#yes i wanted both jay and harley to be hybrids who could be as wild and free as they wanted

[batfoonery]

Badger Banter (Strange Hybrid Batfam! AU)

To the lovely person who asked for more~

Bruce is regularly caught off guard by exactly what lengths Jason will go to in order to give him grey hairs.

By now he shouldn't be, but as a Dad he will never grow immune from--Jason what are you doing?! Giving me a heartattack that's what you're doing. Jason Peter Todd-Wayne, I swear--

Jason, to be specific, is an American Badger hybrid. They aren't the largest breed, but they're still very aggressive and grumpity. Bruce remembers with startling clarity when he accidentally tripped over one of Jay's burrows for the first time. The little cub hadn't meant to claw up his ankle, but he's still got the scars after all these years.

There's webbing in between his fingers and toes. Dick thinks they're great, he loves pinching them and playing with them. Dick gets bitten on the regular.

If you tell him to smile, Jason will just bare his teeth at you. The trick is to distract him with footage of Tim falling over various items.

One time a reporter tried to tell Bruce that Jason wasn't as cute as a European Badger would've been. The other species is more delicate/willowy looking, but Bruce is of the firm opinion that his cub is the cutest ever. The reporter was not prepared to be catching hands and went home with a black eye.

Badgers are made to be digging machines, but Duke was entirely unprepared to find that gossip article focusing in on all the muscles in his big bro's legs and arms. He did not need the phrase "thiccer than tree trunks" haunting him the next time he and Jay dug out a burrow, thnx.

Jason is a part of the waddle squad, although he'll never admit it. Badgers are just built to be muscular with a more squat stature (although, Jason has grown to be surprisingly tall) so their gaits are a bit on the awkward side. Diana regularly demands videos and him and Dami waddling around on the manor grounds.

One day Cass finds an actual badger sete on the manor grounds. She drags Jason out to it, and they huddle around to watch it forage that night. It's the beginning of autumn, so they bring out lots of blankets to huddle under. They're both very surprised, and very honored, when the curious little critter makes its way over to them and shoves its little nose through their blankets and settles in with them with a grunt for a few hours.

Jay isn't the only badger rogue in Gotham....

Years later, Bruce would come to the startling realization that Jason's hybrid species might have been part of the reason he was targeted by the Joker. It makes him sad in ways he cannot put into words, and angry beyond belief.

It's because of one of the insane clown's other former victims, Harley Quinn.

Dr. Harleen Quinzel is an African Honey Badger hybrid. They're known for being the most vicious and cunning in the world, and regularly scare off lions and hyenas.

Despite her cuddly clown appearance, she quickly proves to be an actual menace, when she puts her mind to it and doesn't let anyone hold her back.

So it's a surprise when Bruce stumbles onto her and Jason while on patrol. They're running around rooftops in a strange little game of tag. It all sounds very aggressive, if Bruce is honest. Lots of growls and hisses and puffed up hackles. But they're both laughing in a way that doesn't set off alarm bells, so he figures it's probably a weird territorial thing and leaves them be.

If it's because he doesn't feel like dealing with being bitten, well.... it is a good reason.

It's Jason, to everyone's surprise, who really brings Harley into the family. She's more a fringe aunt or cousin, but there are days when he finds the kids building escape rooms for her and for Jason, because they both enjoy it.

Not puzzle rooms, mind you. These are deep pits filled with various traps and toggles to keep them from escaping. The first time Bruce saw one, it was shaking after a low grade explosion. His heart jumped into his throat, but the badgers just made happy screeches and continued their Great Escape.

"It's like training, Bruce!" Tim reassures him. "They're having fun, and no one will ever catch either off them off guard and be able to hurt them again."

He's still skeptical, up until Black Mask captures the Red Hood after a particularly harsh patrol. Batman is about the storm the building, when his cub pops up by his side. He'd lost his helmet along the way, but otherwise is unscathed from the supposed death trap.

Red Hood and Harley Quinn both end up with reputations of being able to walk through walls. They're un-catch-able. They're wild.