#yes i had to override my other block on tumblr to make this post

[dkpsyhog]

I have a browser extension set to block Desmos after my bedtime because otherwise I will stay up till 2am wasting away while making weird functions and graphs. anyways im still not sure if im really autistic or not, might be making it up

[ynscrazylife]

If requests are open, sorry its another long ass anon prompt, i should call my self sushi at this point.

How about Yn, Stark try to help out on a mission but her dad says its to dangerous. The thing they are working on could kill someone, and yn wants to make sure everyone is safe. She can help, she knows she can. But Stark asks Peter Parker to get her out of there and then he is placed on "baby sitting duty" even though they are both in High school.

Cue yn trying to get back to help using any means necessary and peter trying his best to keep her away from something dangerous. He's trying to calm her down from the incoming panic attack, but she cant seem to breathe. Can't Peter see that her dad is probably going to die? She loves peter but she cannot lose her dad. Everything fades to black.

Yn wakes up in her room after passing out from The panic attack. The whole team is fine, they saved the day. Yn is crying from all of the stress of suddenly being awake after that event when peter cuddles her.

Basically all the angst, with all the fluff right after.

Thanks again 🍣🍣🍣

To be a Hero

Summary: Peter comforts you when your dad and the Avengers are in danger.

Authors Note: I’ve never had a panic attack before so I’ve tried to write it as accurate as I can. Please let me know if I’ve made any mistakes!

Request to be on a taglist (or multiple) here! (Taglists are at the end of the fic)

Main Masterlist | MCU Masterlist

PSA: Do NOT copy, steal, translate, plagiarize, republish, etc any of my works on Tumblr or any other platform. Also, do NOT claim any of my works as your own. All of these works are either requests I’ve gotten that people have wanted me to write or original ideas I’ve had for works. If you happen to take inspiration from anything I’ve written and want to write something inspired by that, please a) ask me firstand b) IF I say yes, credit me as inspo in your post by tagging me and link whatever work of mine that inspired you. Thanks.

“You know, this feels like our first Avengers mission all over again,” Tony said in a dramatic voice as he fires his repulsers.

“If only it was because we were getting shawarma and not fighting another one of Thor’s murderous siblings,” Natasha deadpanned.

You bit back a small laugh as you entered the fight. Thor’s sister Hela had made her presence on Earth with an army of horrid creatures at her beckoning and the Avengers were there to do what they do best, defend and avenge. While the whole team, including your boyfriend Peter, had suited up at the tower, Tony had specifically told you not to get involved. You were only a few months in to being an Avenger and he thought it was too dangerous for you.

But, it took was one override code of FRIDAY’s system to get out of the tower.

“Hey! Technically, Loki was mind-controlled by Thanos,” Thor grumbled.

You smiled, sneaking around a city block before hitting one of the creatures square in the chest. You had a suit that you had designed with your dad along with some pretty cool energy powers.

Unfortunately, the creature didn’t go down with just one blast. You frowned as it growled and turned towards you, starting to advance. The team continued to chatter on comms, trying to keep on joking in order not to think about all the damage Hela was doing. It was nearly getting to be worse than the damage Loki once caused.

It wasn’t letting up, despite your continued blasts. It’d get hit in the face and shake it off (quite literally with a shake of its head). Your heartbeat went off the charts as you stumbled back, panic rising in your chest and your mouth going dry. Shit. This wasn’t going to be the end, was it? That stupid thing wasn’t letting up! It was getting far too close now and you were a second away from going on comms to admit defeat and call for help when suddenly, a blur of red flashed in front of you and then, strong arms wrapped around you.

You let out a shriek as your feet left the ground. “Shh, shh, it’s me,” the familiar voice of Peter soothed you and you calmed down instantly, your arms wrapping around him as he swung onto the rooftop on the nearest building. When you landed, Peter rubbed your back and held you close as he waited you to calm down and get your bearings.

“Thanks,” you whispered, your cheek pressed against his chest, a little embarrassed that he had to come and save the day.

“You know there’s no need to thank me,” Peter assured you in a warm voice, lightly chuckling. After a second, he pulled back and lifted up his mask for a second. “Babe, what are you doing here? Your dad told you stay in the tower.”

You pouted at him. “I want to help, Pete! The whole team’s here, I don’t want to be stuck in the tower,” you said, wanting him to understand.

And oh, he did. He had been unable to attend a lot of the missions when he first started out as an Avenger. He had been annoyed much like how you were now, but he had grown to see that it was for the best. “Y/N, you know we have to tell your dad,” he told you.

Your jaw dropped. “What? No!” You exclaimed, trying to stop Peter from telling KAREN to alert Tony. “What are you doing?!”

Peter finished speaking to KAREN and gave you a knowing look. “Tony would find out sooner and later and I’m not taking the fall,” he said.

You opened your mouth to protest even more, but was cut off by the sound of your dad’s voice. “Y/N Stark!” Tony said, his voice vibrating through both yours and Peter’s comms. “What were you thinking? You know you’re not trained enough to come on this type of a mission.”

“Dad—” you began, not even sure how you were going to defend this.

“No, I don’t want to hear it,” Tony snapped, catching you off guard. Damnit, he really was not happy. Peter squeezed your hand comfortingly. “I’m taking away your ability to override FRIDAY’s codes for now. Peter, please take Y/N back to the Tower. You can return to the fight after.”

You looked away, hot tears of frustration pooling in your eyes. Deep down, you knew that he was justified in this decision, but that didn’t take away your anger or your want to help. “You’re going to take me back to the tower, aren’t you?” You muttered. You didn’t mean to take this out on Peter, but this was one of the times where his loyalty to your dad was working against you.

“Hey,” Peter said gently, grasping your chin in the palm of his hand turning your head so your guys’ eyes met. He titled his head to the side, giving you a knowing but loving look that never failed to make your heart melt. “You know I have to take you back. But you can go to the lab, work on upgrades for your suit, and I promise the fight will be over in no time.” You nodded slowly, not quite believing him even though you wanted to.

Smiling at you, Peter wrapped his arms around you and lifted you into his arms. Usually, his words always did the trick to calm you down, and while he did help to prevent your tears from falling, you couldn’t shake the storm of anger and helplessness that was brewing inside your body.

You were almost like a rag doll in his arms, for once not terrified of Peter swinging you through the streets. Instead, you zoned out, unable to stop the scenarios of your dad and the Avengers getting gravely injured or killed from flashing through your head. You imagined your dad dying and the last thing you said being an argument. It wouldn’t stop and the more the images came, the more tense and frightened you became.

//

It was blatantly obvious for Peter that something was off, something was different. The only time he heard Tony speak like that was when the man had taken his suit away. Plus, when he carried you through the city with his webbing, you were usually clinging to him and letting out squeaks of exhilaration and nervousness. Now, you are still holding onto him tightly, but had gone silent.

He landed on the balcony outside your room, opening your door and leading you inside with his hand bracing your back. He could see clearly that you were deep inside your thoughts and it sent a ripple of pain through him. When the two of you got to the lab, Peter maneuvered himself to stand in front of you, his hands on your shoulders.

“Do you want me to get you water or something? I don’t want to leave you yet,” he said, biting his bottom lip in obvious worry for your state.

The switch from silence to hysteria stunned Peter for a second, but he snapped out of it when your panic didn’t cease. You struggled to control your breathing, body beginning to shake. A sob escaped you and you covered your mouth with your hands. “Y/N, take a deep breath for me,” he said firmly but kindly, mimicking one.

You shook your head so quickly and strongly that it made you dizzy. “I can’t—I can’t—” you wheezed, nearly choking on your sobs.

"Yes, you can. I know it doesn't feel like it, but you can," Peter said, but when he started to see that this wasn't working, he switched tactics. "Come on, let's sit you down."

He tried to maneuver you to the couch, but that backfired almost immediately. Your nails dug into his suit so forcefully that it was enough to make him pause and look back on you. The color had drained from your face and you looked absolutely terrified, a dazed over look in your eyes. "Y/N? Y/N!" He exclaimed, panicking.

You opened your mouth, and that gave Peter hope, but only a small noise, almost a whimper, left your lips before you were falling. What Peter didn't know was that when he tried to move you, he had unintentionally made the dizziness so much worse. That, combined with all five of your senses feeling like they were on fire, was too much for your body to handle at the moment.

Peter's eyes went wide as you dropped quite literally into his open arms. With one hand cradling your head, pressing it against his shoulder, he half-pulled, half-dragged you over to the couch. "Sorry," he couldn't help but apologize, seeing your feet drag.

He got you over to the couch and laid you down, brushing your hair out of your face. At the very least, you looked calmer now, but Peter would much rather you be conscious than unconscious. "FRIDAY, what do I-?" He started to ask, but the A.I was already ahead of him.

"While I cannot diagnose anyone, it appears that Y/N was displaying symptoms of a panic attack and lost consciousness as a result. The best course of action would be to monitor Y/N closely," FRIDAY said.

Peter was no fan of hearing the words panic and attack together, but it did soothe him to know that he didn't have to call 911 or bring you to the hospital. "Thanks," he murmured, watching you for a second. He let out a shaky breath, running his hand through your hair and his thumb over your forehead and cheeks like he knew you liked. A smile came to his face when he remembered how you'd blush normally.

He considered having FRIDAY tell Tony and the team that he wouldn't be going back to the fight, but that would just mean that he'd have to explain and he knew that everyone would be distracted and too worried about you (especially Tony). He sat back, trying to wait as patiently as he could, but couldn't shake the feeling of the need to do something to help or comfort you.

Eventually deciding that you'd be more comfortable on your bed than the touch, Peter scooped you up in his arms again. He tried to pretend that you were just sleeping in his arms, not unconscious, and that brought another soft smile to his lips. He tucked you into bed, not caring that he very much resembled a mother hen right now.

Once he deemed you all cozy, propped up by an absurd amount of pillows and wrapped in fuzzy blankets, Peter decided to change out of his suit. He made FRIDAY swear to alert him if anything about your condition changed, though. After switching to an Avengers sweater and grey sweatpants, Peter made a quick detour to the kitchen to grab you a glass of water and your favorite snack.

As he was walking back into your room, though, Peter saw you start to stir. He quickly put down the water and snack, hurrying to your side and taking a seat on your bed. He placed his hand over yours, smiling as he watched you wake. You looked around, a bit confused at first, before your gaze settled on your boyfriend.

"Peter?" You mumbled, starting to feel a bit nervous as your head was all foggy from fainting.

"Hi," he said sweetly. "You're okay, babe. We're in your room. You fainted. Take a deep breath with me, okay?"

You managed to do that. Peter drew back the covers and slid into bed beside you, wrapping his arms around you as he held you.

"You-you shouldn't be here. My dad-" you began to say.

"-Will be fine. So will the team. I'm right where I need to be, darling," Peter said, keeping his voice calm, gentle, and smooth.

You let out a small puff of air, pausing before speaking again. "He's so mad at me. I-I wanted to help. I'm supposed to be a hero, but I'm not even good enough to stop some creature on my own," you whimpered. As your tears started to come, Peter didn't try to stop them. He knew you needed to let it all out.

Rubbing your arm soothingly. Peter waited to speak. "It was a misunderstanding, Y/N, and you are a good hero-" he began.

"You have to say that, you're my boyfriend," you pouted.

Peter chuckled lightly. "It's true. You are the kindest hero I've ever seen. Some missions just require a little more training and that's okay, it doesn't make you any less of a hero," he said.

You nodded, leaning your head back against his chest. Peter happily continued to rub your arm and hold you.

"I'm still worried about my dad and the team," you whispered.

"I know," Peter whispered back, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. "But if something happened, we'd have heard right now, so try to rest your head, m'kay?"

You nodded again, even if you weren't quite certain that you'd be able to do that. Peter grabbed the water and the snack, passing it to you. That instantly made you smile and you thanked him before practically devouring it. Peter put the glass back on the table when you were done.

The two of you sat there for a while, both happy and content to enjoy each other's presence. After a bit, Peter glanced down and grinned when he saw you asleep. This was like heaven to him, with how cute you were and how he was able to hold and cuddle you.

He ended up losing track of time but soon enough. FRIDAY was quietly alerting him that the team had returned, unharmed.

"Can you tell Tony to come up to Y/N's room?" Peter asked.

A couple minutes later, the man was walking in, still in his suit but without his helmet. "I know you're probably still mad-" he began, running a hand through his hair, only to be cut off by Peter's "shh". He glanced up, not expecting to see the sight he saw. He walked over. "What's going on?"

"Y/N's asleep. Had a panic attack and fainted earlier. Y/N was really scared that something would happen to you and the team," Peter explained.

Tony softened and with a small sigh, sat down. He looked at his sleeping teen, smiling warmly. "Alright. We can talk later. Take good care of my kid, alright Parker?" He whispered, slowly rising from the bed.

"You got it," Peter promised. He'd always take good care of you.

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[jaxtherabbit]

why i deleted the (original) jaxtherabbit blog:

the main reason was that the blog wasn't getting the attention it deserved. back when i started, the posts were getting 50+ notes, but as time passed the blog started to die slowly and every post was not even getting past 1 note. i think i started to notice a trend in loss of notes around about after the dyno arg? which is why i quickly created another arg. and a third arg. keep in mind these were rushed, they were literal defibrillators for the blog so it would stay relevant.

inevitably, the blog was forgotten about, even with desparate attempts such as drawing, hijacking / overriding soup's arg, and interaction bait.

the second reason was the jax ask blog clones. right off the bat, i already had a problem with the clones EXISTING as i have had someone impersonate me before (not a jax clone) and the impersonator left a bad mark on my reputation. so i was like, "nope, fuck this, i'm calling them out and blocking them before it gets out of control" but it felt like every second a new jax clone was created. it just was too much for me, i was overwhelmed with basically copied and pasted souless gimmicky slop. like, with literally any other character, there's at least 7 blogs to interact with. ok cool, i didn't mind that too, bring on the competition. but. there was fucking 25 at one point, i'm sure of it. some weren't even trying to hide the fact that they were a gimmick account.

and to those of you saying that i'm just jealous of other people's success, to that, i say "yes". i am jealous that despite me being the first tadc character blog ever, envy got the better of me and eventually i was too knee deep in getting angry at seeing others perform well that i just couldn't keep my composure.

i hope you understand and respect my decision, it was a tough one to make, and i thought about it for a really long time. i'm sorry if this news does not come to you on a good note.

on tumblr, i will be active on ONLY @putting-zooble-in-places

i will be active on the tadc tab discord: https://discord.gg/vg6cyxwywz

ps: @ciagent8 i give up on the january event, tell me everything /gen /srs

pps: i'm fine /gen /srs

[thesaltyace]

big rant/ramble below, you can safely ignore and move on to the next post in your feed.

Urgh

I shared the results of that autism screener with a quasi-friend who I thought would be "safe" (we used to work together and we connected over his being gay and me being visibly queer) but his response was blergh

Everyone has hints of autism.

okay yeah but this isn't just *hints* of autism. I'm answered yes to symptoms I've had since I was a kid that I've learned to mask or work around as an adult. But I still struggle with them.

He pointed out that he sees me as more ADHD than ASD.

Yeah, fair, and I'd need to see a professional to try to distinguish if my symptoms are ADHD, ASD, or both.

You don't hit the three prongs needed for a diagnosis.

But.... but I do. And the stuff I dealt with as a kid is still stuff I deal with today. I just mask it better. A short and not exhaustive list:

As I kid I had trouble interacting with peers. I didn't have friends, really. I didn't know how to make friends and I didn't try terribly hard to. I acquire friends when someone else "adopts" me and decides that we are friends. And once I became an adult, I have almost never had friends of my own - I share a friend group with my spouse who we're primary connected to through him. I'm okay with that. Maintaining a friendship entirely on my own power sounds impossible and exhausting.

I was okay with not having friends, I liked being alone, but my mom insisted on me being social. She made me join things so that I would have a list of people to invite to parties. I'd honestly have preferred a day of doing stuff I like or just a couple friends. As an adult, I want to be alone on my birthday. I will celebrate with certain friends, separately, usually over a quiet meal. That's it.

I had trouble understanding sarcasm and figurative speech. Like, I understand it now but I still think most figurative speech is annoying. I've been told the way I deliver sarcasm is weird, too.

I liked memorizing movies and quoting them start to finish, I thought it was fun but everyone else thought it was weird. I continued to do this into adulthood but I only quote aloud when I'm alone. Alamo Drafthouse quote-alongs are the BEST. I don't do this with every movie, either, just ones I really like.

Okay actually I also liked to listen to the same album or, in some cases, the same song over and over until I was sick of it (and sometimes even after that point). I mean, just endlessly looping on repeat. Not interspersed with other songs. I do this as an adult a LOT because it's easier with headphones to do this without annoying everyone else around you. Like, often it's fine for me to just put a playlist on shuffle, but I get into Moods where I just want the one album/song over and over. Yesterday I listened to Wellerman about 50 times in a row and only stopped because I had to get up and do something else and that song wasn't "good" for whatever I got up to do.

My special interest as a kid was cats. Literally everything cats, all the time - I sought out obscure facts and could tell you the difference between similar species, and wanted cats involved in literally everything I did. Adults laughed it off as childhood obsession. I was also pretty obsessed with the solar system. I thought asking my peers, as a trivia question, which of Jupiter's moons had its own asteroid (Io, in case you were wondering) was appropriate and interesting and was confused that they didn't know that. That was in fifth grade.

I watched the weather channel for fun. I would watch it for hours and absorb the weekly forecast info just... for fun? I never used it, could never tell you if you should dress a certain way or bring an umbrella or whatever. Everyone thought it was weird.

I was a know-it-all and literally could not stop myself from bluntly correcting people who were wrong. Didn't know or care that it was "rude". I'm still that way but I've learned how to sometimes swallow the urge long enough to find a more tactful way to point it out (but often fail).

I could read on my own before kindergarten, used vocabulary beyond what one would expect for my age, and had a special interest in spelling and grammar throughout my school years. I did not understand how other people weren't interested in learning about it and getting it right. I read at an undergrad level by 4th grade.

I hated loud noises and often covered my ears to block out irritating sounds. I could also hear high pitched noises that even other kids didn't seem to hear (or at least weren't bothered by them). Too much noise sent me into an internal meltdown, I'd just kinda shut down because I couldn't deal with it.

Textures and pressure on my skin bothered the absolute fuck out of me - sock seams, certain fabric materials, socks that weren't equally elastic, one shoe tighter than the other, tags.... all of that. (Also, fun anecdote I just unlocked - when I was 4 or 5 my grandmother started letting me use the soft silk sleep shirt she had as a young woman because I preferred it to anything else. Soft, smooth, no irritating qualities. Bliss. I wanted to wear it all the time.)

Don't get me started on food. Until I was in COLLEGE I mostly subsisted on pasta with either butter or alfredo sauce and chicken. I would eat other things, but pasta and/or chicken was (and still is) my biggest safe/comfort food. I'd eat other stuff mostly if I could control the balance of ingredients, get it made plain, or could confirm the texture wouldn't be offensive (so, like... plain burgers, plain cheese pizza, grilled cheese, mashed potatoes, etc.) I cannot stress this enough - from childhood through COLLEGE I did this. As a kid my mom had to make me a completely separate dish most nights to get me to eat something. My spouse was horrified at what little variety I ate. The only reason I eat so much variety now is that he knows what I do/don't like and tells me in advance if I'll find a texture or taste offensive. Of course, rather than wanting consistent texture like I did when I was younger, I now seek as much texture as possible (so long as they aren't Bad textures) so.... that's fun. But yeah most of my objections to Yucky foods is due to T E X T U R E. Even if I like the taste, the texture overrides it all.

I prefer animals to people. I will seek out animals and interact with them instead of people in the same room. And will pointedly focus on the animal to avoid interacting with people.

I'm perfectly happy with only myself for company. Being with just my spouse counts as me being "alone" though. Always has. I just realized last night that it's because I do minimal to no masking around him because he's a safe person to unmask with and always has been. Never batted an eye at the weird shit I do beyond asking questions about what I was doing or why. And then just "Okay."

Okay honestly just the fact that I want to vent into the void of tumblr instead of actually discussing this with a person - even my spouse! - pretty effectively shows how little it occurs to me to interact with other people directly. o_0

And there are so many more things that I won't list here because I could just go on and on. And like, sure, some of this may certainly overlap with ADHD but my point is that I have enough to point to ASD that it doesn't feel like having a "hint" of autism. And who knows - maybe it is mostly just ADHD and CPTSD stuff interacting in weird ways. Could be!

But just because I can make small talk and make eye contact and do the "normal" shit and I can interact "normally" doesn't mean I LIKE it. I had to LEARN to do those things to avoid having bad social interactions. When I'm by myself or with my spouse, I behave very differently than I do around anyone else. ANYONE. It's not just slightly changing my behavior depending on who I'm with - it's completely suppressing how I naturally would do things if left to my own devices.

Like, the things we recommended to our autistic students who wanted to know how to interact in ways that would help them blend in/be accepted by others ARE THE EXACT THINGS I ALREADY DO. Like, it did not occur to me at the time that neurotypicals literally do not have to think about doing those things. I thought, ah, these students just need to be told what the tricks are. Other people figure these tricks out on their own. It did not occur to me that other people, in fact, do not learn these tricks because they naturally do that behavior. They do not have to actively think about learning the trick, period. I literally thought other people also have to think as hard as I do about interactions. Evidently not.

So yeah, I'm feeling a little upset about the reaction I got from him because I'm like.... honestly, a diagnosis of ASD wouldn't change a lot about how I do things or think of things. But it would make me feel better about interacting with and participating in autism-related stuff if I am actually autistic. I realize I can use the resources and supports meant for ASD regardless, and for formal supports anything I can access due to my ADHD diagnosis likely covers anything I'd need for ASD. But having a diagnosis opens up more community. Right now I'm like yeah I'm ADHD but I totally relate to this ASD content. But I'm not going to interact much because I feel like I don't have the right to join in since idk if I do have ASD.

idk I have a lot of feelings. I had a bad email about the trans insurance coverage thing yesterday and I'm not in a great headspace, but finding out me and my spouse both scored very high on the autism screening stuff was honestly a high point because we ended up sharing a lot of how we view and interact with the world that was very eye-opening about why we interact the way we do, how we relate to others (and how other people think we're weird for how we relate to others), and just...everything. And having someone be skeptical after I've spent a lot of time trying to convince myself that I DON'T have ASD only to conclude that at the very least, I should probably be evaluated because I can't reasonably rule it out. Like, most people do not wonder if they have autism. The fact that I am spending this much time looking into it and trying to find examples to disprove it only to find I overwhelmingly can't in virtually every single diagnostic category.... just..... dismissing it outright is kinda hurtful.

Like, I recognize that ADHD symptoms overlap a fair bit, but seriously. My spouse (who definitively does not have ADHD) scored almost identically to me and we vibed on almost everything when we compared answers. We see most things similarly. We have similar areas of confusion about other people and for fundamentally similar reasons. I can't imagine all of the stuff that points to ASD for me is just ADHD in disguise, not when I vibe THAT HARD with someone else. Spouse does not vibe with me on ADHD content. At all. He can appreciate it since he does live with me, after all, and observes whatever's being discussed. But he doesn't vibe with it. He vibes with autism content, though. And I vibe with both.

idk this rant ended in rambling and I'm just going to go listen to Inside on repeat for a couple hours while I try to calm down a bit. o_0

[lildevyl]

Web Of Lies

Summary:  Mysterious glitches and messages have been popping up on all monitors and TVs all over the Community Hub.  Abbie is in the Record Room trying to decode a hidden message only to be fooled by a Web of Lies.

Based on the FNAF the Musical: Web of Lies and inspiration from this post of the Community Hub by @huffletrax and everyone in the Community who reblogged and participated!  And also inspired by Domino Effect ARG.  I love Abbie’s (@ill-spink) and River’s (@egopocalypse) Marvin in this ARG!  Keep up the good work and every fiend that is a part of it!  I absolutely love this!

Guest Staring:  Abbie, @ill-spink.

Thanks again for guest staring and I hope you like this!

TW:  Mild Gore, Mention of Glitches/Soft!Anit/Canon!Anti, Strings and implied mind control.

(Record Room)

Abbie snuck into the Record Room of the Community Hub and quickly went to the computer.  There was a file that they had to decode!  A message came to them saying that this would help them in their investigation.  They weren’t a theorist but they could easily help out in shape, way, or form.  They were a writer after all, so they could see things from a different point of view.

The Community was on fire again.  It’s been a year, but something was off!  Jack wasn’t acting like himself and they were determined to find out what it was that was causing all this!  Everyone kept saying it was Anit, but Abbie had a gut feeling that it was more than just Anti, they just couldn’t put their finger on it.

(Abbie)

One year has passed since things began to change,

And the JSE Community was cursed  .  .  .

The glitches and messages were all mysterious and strange,

And still I bought it all at first.

Abbie went to the bookshelf that was near them and ran their hand over a few theory books.  They found the one that they were looking for and flipped to the theory that everyone dismissed.

(Abbie)

They denied  .  .  .

A string of mysterious disappearances that’s been implied

No matter what I’ve tried,

I’ve always been

Caught within

A web of lies  .  .  .

The computer that they were working on, came to life.  It looked as if the update that they had ran had finally finished.  There!  There was that mysterious file that someone from the Community was talking about!  Finally!  They were going to get some answers to what was going on!

(Abbie)

A strange hidden file fell into my lap  .  .  .

I need to uncover the truth!

Typing frantically away at the computer, Abbie was determined to figure out what has been going on.  Jack had been acting out of character.  Marvin disappeared and no body has seen him.  Glitches and mysterious messages all over Tumblr and YouTube videos.  Finally, finally, someone had managed to find out what has been happening.

(Abbie)

Access denied?

Yes, override.

Oh no, did I just goof?

(Ego Corp)

The Canon Egos sat around a table in Ego Corp conducting a meeting outside of the Community’s ears.  None of them want anyone to over hear what they’re talking about.  No need to cause the Community to panic.

(Chase)

Jack has not been acting like himself

Ever since he’s gotten that strange call

(Jackie)

He’s acting as if 

He’s complete and utter doll

(Henrik)

Now us three

Need your help to set Our Creator free.

(Jackie)

We’ll find our Creator.

And fight the ebb

Of the web of lies  .  .  .

“JJ, keep an eye out.  I think somethings not right with the other Egos,” Chase said to JJ.

I’m on it.  JJ signed and headed out with the others.  The Egos head out, never knowing that someone was watching them.

(The Community Hub)

JJ headed out with the other Egos and had a blow horn with him to sound the alarm if something were to happen.  Unfortunately, JJ never had the chance to use it.  He was ambushed by the Non-Canon and Fan-made Egos!  He couldn’t sound the alarm to warn the others!

(Jackie)

That’s it! Right there!  Jack’s recording room.

And there’s not a soul in sight  .  .  .

Nobody saw the Non-Canon and Fan-made Egos coming up behind them and from the shadows.  Nor did anybody saw that JJ was with them, with midnight blue strings attached to his wrists and a blank look in his eyes.  Jackie tried the door, but it was locked.  He began to pick the lock and that was when the Non-Canon and Fan-made Egos attacked!

Soft!Anti was no match for them and he went pretty bad.  All of them decided to put strings on him and turn him into a puppet.  Perfect for their master to use him to help gain even more puppets.  Jackie was doing his best to hold off as many of the Non-Canon and Fan-made Egos as possible.  “Henrik!  Quick!  We have to warn the others!”

Henrik quickly bolted down the hall, just as Jackie succumb to the strings and joined the Non-Canon and Fan-made Egos as a puppet.

(Recorder Room)

(Abbie)

Abort!  Escape!  Control, alt, delete!  Stop trying to install!

Forty million kilobytes!

Something’s wrong  .  .  .

This AI’s gotten far too strong  .  .  .

Smoke started to pour out of the computer and the file began to corrupt every data there was.  And glitched in and out on the screen until it went completely black.  Then someone started to climb out of the computer.  No, out of an alter dimension portal.

(Abbie)

You’ve used me all along

To set you free.

Now I see

Your web of lies  .  .  .

“Ah, thank you, Abbie,” the mysterious man greeted.

Abbie was shaking in their shoes.  This man, looked and sounded like Marvin the Magnificent but something was off.  This - this wasn’t Marvin.  Not their Marvin.  Not the Community’s beloved magician.

“What are you?”  Abbie asked terrified and tried to find something - anything to defend themselves with.

“I’m a hidden file.  Or am I?  I guess none of us are quite what we seem.”  Marvin began to approach Abbie and Abbie doing the smart thing, started backing up.  They knew this room better than anyone else.  “Take you for example.  A hard working writer, whom they and their partner are actually undercover puppets for AntiSepticeye.  Oh, come on?  You think you and your partner could really hide the fact that you two aren’t his most loyal puppets?”

“Get away from me!”  Abbie demanded backed up in a corner.  They began looking around and found large pocket knife and held in their hands.

“Oh, hey.”  Marvin said putting his hands up in faux surround.  “You freed me. You deserve award.”  The Non-Canon Egos came in and blocked Abbie in, and Marvin took out midnight blue strings to use on Abbie to make them be his puppet instead.

Abbie with the pocket knife started to go to town with the Non-Canon Egos.  Normally, they wouldn’t do this, normally they wouldn’t be so violent.  But this was anything but normal.  Once they found an opening, Abbie took off like a bat out of hell!  Bursting through the doors, they ran down the hall to the Community Hub.  They had to warn everyone.  They had to warn the Community that this Marvin, wasn’t their Marvin.  He was Corrupted!

(Marvin)

The doors are locked. This Community is mine!

I’m in your reality!

So run and hide!  Cause here’s the bottom line:

You’re all trapped in here with me!

Marvin and the Non-Canon Egos went to the Ego Corp.  They had some Canon Egos they needed to deal with.

(Marvin)

Go on! Shout,

No one will ever let you out!

And lest there’s any doubt

Marvin and the Non-Canon Egos found the room where the Canon Egos were and began to break down the metal door.  Robbie the Zombie braced himself against the door trying to give, the others some time.

(Marvin)

All hope has died,

Trapped inside

My web of lies!

The door crashed down on Robbie the Zombie and Marvin just stepped on the door crushing Robbie.  The other Egos were terrified of this Marvin.  Never have they seen such power except from Anti and Dark.

Canon!Anti glitch and surged with such rage.  How dare someone come into the Community Hub where his puppets were and had the nerve to use them against him!  Canon!Anti charged right at the intruder, only for Marvin to stop him with his magic.

“What is this?  It’s cute.”  Marvin stated deadpan.  Then with a wave of his hand sent Canon!Anti flying backwards to the computer.  Canon!Anti hit the computer, glitching uncontrollably and was absorbed into the computer.  Into the web of the JSE Community where he could communicate from there.

“Ah, the great protagonist Chase Brody and the famous Canon Egos.”  Marvin said with glee.

“Are you going to kill us?”  Chase whimpered.

“No,” Marvin stated pulling out the midnight blue strings.  “I got something better planned.”

====================

Tagging:  @septic-dr-schneep, @egopocalypse, @epicfangirl01, @ill-spink, @isa-ghost, @10th-no-name-person, @weirdmixofweirdness, @dezzydynamite, @thevampireauthoress, @the-scribe-watches, @kisstheashes, @kangaroo-roux@shadowsinyoursoul, @julywinters, @jackjames-exe, @corruptedmetadata, @chaoticcrimsonrose, @a-humble-narcissus, @littlepinkchan, @fear-is-nameless, @huffletrax, @d-structive, @dolphintreasureart, @run-stray-wolf, @thefirsttobreak, @miishae-archived, @nightfuryobsessed, @starlightstarfight

[ask-de-writer]

GONE TO SEA : World of Sea : Science Fiction : Part 8

GONE TO SEA

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

WORK IN PROGRESS (Word count unknown at this time)

copyright 2018

Writing started 2005

All rights reserved.

Reproduction in any form, physical, electronic or digital is prohibited without the express consent of the author.

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Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions. All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

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The disk sailed across to little Mala'klea who did catch it expertly. Beaming, she said, “Thanks, Mom!  This one is for Molly and her team.  We have more and can make them for anyone else that wants one!”

Mister Makle observed, “That is more than I have heard you say even when you were drawing up the boat plan.”

Mala'klea, cringing like she expected to be hit, looked about fearfully, and went silent.  Pele crouched beside her daughter and pulled her into a hug.  Mala'klea hugged back fiercely, tears leaking from the corners of her eyes.

Pele spared a look for the shocked Recycle and Maintenance people in the big office.  Still holding her daughter, she told them, “Klea was one of the children that Mister Angerson was caught beating for refusing to pray to his God during their schooling time.  Instead of teaching them math, he was trying to force the children to follow him in his suicidal mania that he calls a religion.

“He was particularly brutal to those kids that he called pagans.  Since my little Klea follows our family's polytheistic beliefs, he beat her the worst of all.  The station's doctors found two cracked ribs and a hairline fracture of the right radius.

“Mala'klea refused to give in to his assault but he did manage break her trust in most people.

“Mister Angerson has been formally required to surrender his teaching duties and stay away from the children.  He has been forbidden to ever touch or speak to any of them.  His own wife and two children moved into our apartment to get away from him.  Trisha has filed with the station's Executive Committee for a divorce.”

One of the men from Molly's Maintenance crew said, “I know about the schooling problem.  I was on the jury.  What Angerson did sickened us all.  He claimed that God Himself ordered him to discipline the children for their unbelief and that God's orders override the Colonial Charter.  We all disagreed.  The verdict was unanimous.”

Molly volunteered, “That idiot Marcus cornered me once and tried to convince me that we are doomed.  God sent us all here to die by slow starvation for our sins.  Seems that we are all to be the Sacrifice For The New Covenant to preserve all of  mankind's colonies in space.

“He seems to forget that both the thymine and lysine that are our last real stumbling blocks have been spotted from orbit, even if they haven't been isolated to any particular organism yet.  In the meantime, the plants and animals that we brought along are filling the gap.  We will find what we need someday, probably soon.”

Pele nodded to Molly then gave her daughter another hug and asked her, “Do you have any sort of plan or working drawings for the boat that Mister Makle mentioned?  What are you thinking of making it out of?”

Everyone watched silently as Mala'klea went fearfully to Mister Makle's desk and, darting glances all about, brought her mother the pages of sketches.  She took one of the flying disks from Cora and wordlessly handed it to her mother as well.  

Pele's eyes lit up and she sat cross-legged in front of Mala'klea and patted her lap.  Looking meaningfully about at the other adults for silence, Pele said, “This is a wonderful start, Klea.  Please tell me about it.”

Mala'klea began almost inaudibly, “We can use old filter disks and rectangles to make the planks.  See, Mother?  The big side planks are the same width all along their length.  By keeping the angles of the side to bottom planks the same, it is just a long four plank dory, the same way that the old Polynesian voyaging ships were built.”

Mother gave daughter a quick hug and prodded, “How will you make the planks out of the smaller pieces, Dear?”

Mala'klea answered more confidently, “To make the flying disks we had to make a glue out of Moreson's eels.  Because of the messy way that they come apart when we heat them, we call them Goo fish.  We had to try several ways to get the glue right.  We had some of the disks stick together by accident.  That gave me the idea for laminating the parts.”

Pele nodded in happy seeming approval.  “Very observant, Klea.  How will you hold the planks and ribs together?”

The other children of Cora's Crowd almost bit their lips to keep quiet.  Cora stopped one of Molly's crew from speaking by whispering, “We have seen this before.  This is how Pele helps Mala'klea to stop being scared.  Let Klea answer for now.”

The man nodded understanding and held his tongue.

Mala'klea almost eagerly told her mother, “We can get strings from the mussels that grow almost everywhere on the Station's docks.  Cora figured out the glue and filter thing but it was Jason who thought of the string.  It was Matty that thought of making a boat.  I put their ideas together.

“We can use string that we make from the mussel threads to tie the parts together.  Once we are ready, we can laminate more skin over the joints to waterproof them.  We can lock the ribs into place the same way.  It is only a little different from the way that you were putting together the latest big Polynesian ship that you and your friends were building back on Earth.”

Pele grinned at her daughter, and looking her in the eye, pointed out, “Those planks and parts will need to be trimmed to shape, and many holes drilled in them to tie them together.  How will you manage that?”

By now, Mala'klea was answering eagerly and openly again.  “Jason and I made some knives and other tools out of Strong's shark teeth!  Jason brought them down here to show to Mr. Makle.  We can cut and trim the glued skin with them.  We made an awl that can make the holes.  When you were making that big canoe, you had a bow drill thing to make the holes but I couldn't remember how to make one.”

Jason silently handed a roll-up of knives and other tools to Mala'klea who unrolled it to show her mother.  Pele took the time to examine each knife and tool carefully.  She thoughtfully tested edges and checked the orientation of the natural serrations in the fangs that the knife and tool edges and points were made of.  One tool was made from a piece of flat bone with fairly coarse teeth carved into it for spreading and forcing glue into the skin.  The tool had the sheen of a waxy coating worked into the bone.  They all had handles formed of many layers of the skin and glue.  Each handle was carefully formed to fit the hands of the children.  Pele even examined the leather of the roll-up.

Nodding with a smile as she felt the softness of the leather, Pele asked Mala'klea, “Is this made out of some of the Strong's skin with your oil from the Goo fish worked in to soften it?”

Mala'klea smiled at her mother and said, “Yes, mother.  Mikal Novotnoy thought of doing that.  We all worked on different parts of it.  It is stitched with the mussel string.  We needed something that would keep the tools sharp and save us from getting cut on them.”

Pele gave Mala'klea another hug and stood up, holding the child's hand.  She said, “This is a really well thought out project, Klea.  I especially like the way that you gave credit for ideas to the others. I think that this ship will make a great project.  

“It will need you children to do a lot of math to figure out the details. You will need good language skills to present what you figure out to the rest.  We can use this project for a big part of you kid's schooling.  It will make a perfect demonstration of the relationship between what you are taught in class and the real world.  It will also be more fun than any lessons should be.”

Mr. Makle thoughtfully consulted his computer, accessing the Public Announcements.  Looking up he said, “You kids don't need to worry about Mr. Angerson any more.  He is forbidden to even come near to any of you, including his own family or your projects.  If he tries, we can lock him up.  The Executive Order implementing the jury verdict of child abuse was posted about four days ago.”

Pele looked over at Mr. Makle and asked him, “How can we keep him away from this project?  It will need a lot of room to build it and, because of their time in the classrooms, the kids won't be able to work on it all of the day.”

Mr. Makle looked cheerfully at the children of Cora's Crowd and said, “Maintenance will contribute building space for it down on Maintenance Dock C.  Its access ways all lock.  As soon as you are ready for the actual building to begin, let me know and I will formally reserve it for you.  Due to the suspicion of sabotage to the Reverse Osmosis Desalination plant, we have been given the authority to forbid access to ANY unauthorized personnel.  We can arrest trespassers if necessary.  C Dock is already equipped with surveillance cameras and alarms.

“We installed the locks, alarms and cameras because we are storing those new fiberglass boats that you have been making for us down there.  If we do have a saboteur, those boats could become a prime target.”

TO BE CONTINUED

<==PREVIOUS   NEXT==>

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to World of Sea

[starfleetorbust]

Update. Explanation. Story.

So here’s the update that you can skip if you just want to read the story. Jen got into a really really dark place and withdrew from tumblr and from life and from everything. And no one even seemed to notice and that just made things even worse and some... stuff happened. Stuff that isn’t good. And I took solace in writing. Because I had to, because I had nothing else. And I wrote more words than I think I’ve written in my life. It kinda all came out in this huge long story that I never figured I could write so much about Spock and me. And it took all my thoughts and feelings and put them on paper. This is just a tiny snippet of it, the fic is kinda a collection of these short stories as Spock kinda guided me through my thoughts and helped me make sense of them and keep me from making bad choices. 

This one that isn’t as triggery as most of the fic, which gets really dark at points. I wanted to post the whole thing but I didn’t feel anyone wants to read it because its LONG and it definitely READS as personal and its a lot of my thoughts which I know people but if anyone is interested I really still want to post it? If anyone would even want? Because I still am proud of it, but I know it deals with a lot of things. And I mean a lot. So... idk

But explanation: This chapter (?) was my favorite and one of the least painful ones. And one that I love. And one with a good ending. And one I’m proud of. So I changed up this.  I put it in second person and figured maybe this one was worth something to someone.

Warning: Even as the most mild part in this, this is still triggery. It’s got mentions of suicidal thoughts and guns and stuff. I don’t know how to tag it.

It’s about 2000 words, I didn’t check since it was part of a bigger thing. And it’s definitely not checked. I mostly just ran over it with a vague sweep when I changed it to you’s and your’s.

It also reads very.... TOS Kirk when its out of context like this. They’re meant to be AOS? But if you want to read it as TOS that’s fine.

The stolen phaser had put the ship on red alert while the crew searched to find it. Floors had been locked down, every nonessential crewman confined to quarters. Which left you terrified, hiding in one of the back supply closets, with the phaser tucked against your chest as you climbed one of the cabinets in the back to settle on top of it where there was more room. You curled your knees to your chest and took several unsteady breaths, glancing down at the gun you’d stolen. This wasn’t like you, but it wouldn’t matter in a few moments.

The door handled juttered and the gun immediately went from facing my own chest to aimed at the doorway. The lock held and you heard the voices on the other side.

“Come on Jim, why am I coming along with you to locate an intruder?”

You heard the sound of a sigh as he pressed the buttons into the panel to unlock the door. “Because Bones, there’s no ships in the vicinity. No planets. This was someone already on board. And no one in their right mind on my ship would steal a weapon for any purpose. So it’s gotta be someone in their wrong mind. And /that’s/ what you’re here for.”

You heard a groan as the door opened and you immediately saw the small team that must have been searching the deserted hallways. The captain was there with the CMO on his heels and a security with a phaser trained into the room. Spock trailed behind them, barely visible from the doorway.

“Y/n…” Kirk said, taking the entire situation in hand. You clearly were holding the stolen weapon, hidden in a room. He sounded like he didn’t want to believe the situation in front of him. He grabbed his communicator. “Bridge, put the ship on yellow alert.” The alarms went quiet and you saw his jaw set as his voice took on what you could only call his captain’s voice.

“Y/l/n, what are you doing in here with the stolen weapon?”

You shook your head and tried to pull the phaser closer to you, but the security saw the movement and jumped. Startled, you pulled the trigger without thinking and he collapsed to the ground in the room. Your eyes went wide as saucers and you shook your head repeatedly, trying to understand what you’d just done.

“Dammit! Let me see him” McCoy pushed Jim aside into the hall but was caught by Jim’s arm before he entered. “She’s still armed, Bones.”

McCoy held up his hands, tricorder in one. “Y/n, I need to look at him, can I step in.”

You nodded even though the phaser was still aimed in your shaking hands. McCoy moved slowy and knelt next to the guard, running a quick scan. “He was only hit with a stun but at this proximity, I better check him.” He glanced to Jim who nodded and McCoy carefully picked up the passed out guard and slipped out, heading to medbay.

Your eyes went to Spock now that he wasn’t blocked and you saw a mixture of disbelief and betrayal in them. He didn’t understand, you weren’t trying to hurt anyone. He didn’t understand that you just meant to make things better, this wasn’t supposed to involve anyone else. He must have thought you were a monster.

“I didn’t mean to shoot him,” you whispered loud enough Jim could hear.

“Y/n, what are you doing with that phaser.” He stepped into the doorway with his hands in front of him, making sure he wasn’t a threat.

“I didn’t mean to shoot him,” you repeated. There were tears clouding the edge of your vision.

“And I believe you, y/n. But I need you to lower your weapon and talk to us.”

You realized the phaser was still pointed at the doorways and you lowered it, watching some of the tension of the captain disappear now that you were listening.

“Hand over the gun, y/n.” Your eyes were locked on Spock though, who was still looking like he didn’t want to believe the mess in front of him.

You couldn’t hand it over. You knew if you did, you’d be charged with the assault of an officer and the theft of a weapon. They’d throw you in the brig and then you’d never be able to continue with this. You shook your head and tightened your grip.

“I don’t want to have to order you to hand it over. This can be resolved peacefully, y/n.”

You shook your head harder and felt the tears finally break through, and fly from your eyes. “I can’t,” you said through a cracked voice. “I messed up. I can’t go back now, I can’t…”

“Yes you can,” he insisted firmly. Your eyes hadn’t left Spock’s and now he glanced back at the first officer behind him. “Spock, we need her to come down peacefully. I know she’ll listen to you.”

You saw him step into the doorway, face completely stoic but his eyes betrayed his uncertainty. You knew he’d made a promise once to never order you into a situation that made you uncomfortable, and now you could see him trying to figure out how to get your down without breaking that vow.

“Ashayam,” he said slowly, “why did you take it?”

“I needed to go.”

“Go-?” Jim started but Spock shook his head to indicate this wasn’t the time.

“I need to go Spock. I can’t do anything here. I’m useless, and no one cares.”

“You are mistaken if you believe-”

“Am I?” you countered and slumped slightly. “Last week I didn’t show up for three shifts in a row. You know who noticed? No one. I wasn’t even reprimanded. I could have been dead and no one would have even realized. No one cares about me, Spock. No one notices when I’m gone. No one sees when I suffer. I’m better off gone.”

Jim looked like he was going to say something but Spock held up a hand and let you continue your rant. You needed to get this out.

“It wasn’t supposed to go like this. I was gonna take the weapon and then I’d be gone before they could notice and the phaser would take care of the body. They’d find the missing item in a back closet and no one would think twice about it. No one was going to get hurt, Spock. But now I have to do it. I can’t even try to live a life I’ve just screwed up beyond repair. If this goes on my record I’d be pulled from the ship and the only thing that was anchoring me this long. Don’t you understand? I have to do this Spock.”

“Y/n,” Jim said carefully. “If this is about the charges, I can make you a deal. Ericson was only hit on stun, and from your own story, you didn’t steal the weapon for malicious purposes. You hand over the phaser and come down, and I’ll drop both charges.”

It sounded almost too perfect but you glanced to Spock and he knew your apology from your eyes without it being said. You shook your head slowly. You came here to disappear, you didn’t want to stay on the ship like this. “I can’t. No one cares. No one noticed I was gone before. No one will even know but you two.”

You’d learned to read Spock well and his eyes seemed to almost chuckle. It was a sad chuckle but you saw it. “K’diwa. Jim noticed the minute you were late to shift. I asked him not to take any action. I wished to check on you, but your doors were locked and it would have been an invasion to override your quarters. After several crewman expressed worry that you had not showed up to the dining hall, I asked Doctor McCoy to check that you were eating. Once I was assured that you were, I knew you would come to me if you needed. I apologize that I did not make my presence more available to you.”

You tried to process the words, but you couldn’t seem to decide it he was truthful or exaggerating the story to make you come down.

“If dropping the charges won’t make you give me the phaser, what will?” Kirk tried.

“Nothing,” you said shifting your gaze to the tool. You knew you could just end this now but you felt something was stopping you. Perhaps the way Spock was watching you, the disgust now replaced with fear and worry.

“There must be something,” he pressed. “We can get you help once you come down. What is it you want?”

“A kiss,” you shot snarkily before you could think. You needed to think. This was all too much and he was interrupting your thoughts.

Jim chuckled. “You know, I’m flattered. If you really insist on one…”

“Not…. Not from you,” you tried to amend, realizing what you’d said.

“From Spock?” he asked with a chuckle, and you glanced down. You hadn’t kissed Spock yet. Your relationship was new and you knew he enjoyed your company but now after everything you doubted he’d want to kiss you. He probably would want to terminate the relationship of someone so unstable.

“I’ll accept.” He broke your thoughts. When you blinked hard and looked up he nodded softly. “Come down and hand me the phaser and I will kiss you.”

“I’ll even do you one better,” Jim offered. “After you get your kiss, head down to medical with me. If we get you set up with Doctor McCoy, I’ll drop those charges anyways. This doesn’t have to be the end of a good officer. This needs to be the beginning of a healing.”

Glancing between the two of them, you finally slid down and Jim stepped aside as you walked over to Spock. He held out his hand and you hesitantly set it in it, knowing that was your chance. He locked it on his belt out of reach and instantly pulled you into familiar arms. You instinctively pressed your head into his chest. A finger guided your head up to look at him and your eyes locked only a moment before you were caught in the kiss.

His lips were warmer than you’d expected despite his naturally cool temperature. They were soft and gentle as he guided you in the motions you were almost to nervous to think about. You felt yourself dissolve against him until he finally parted and rested his forehead to yours.”

“I don’t ever want you to feel this way again. We will get you help, y/n. I won’t lose you.”

You nodded silently against him and when you looked back up, Jim was offering his hand. “I won’t force you to come with me. But I have a feeling you want to.”

You took his hand carefully, and glanced back at Spock. “Can he come with us?”

Jim nodded. “Of course he can.”

You felt Spock’s arm wrap around your back. You leaned into him as Jim took the lead and guided to you medbay. For the moment you didn’t feel so ignored.