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steve0discusses · 4 years

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Yugioh S4 Ep 24: Someone Actually Called the Cops.

So recently I was like, “I should do something different than my usual” and I decided to open up a little thread for critiquing ppl’s short stories, and I kid you not, the very first story I got was someone’s Seto Kaiba erotica. Which, even in erotica form, did not have very much romance in it. So, now that Yugioh will apparently haunt my every waking move forever until I die, lets get back to S4. Lets desperately get back to canon. I miss canon.

Last we left off, Kaiba lost KaibaCorp...again. Really feels like he loses this company once every couple of years (weeks if we count season 1-3). Except, this time, Dartz didn’t read the fine print in the legal files that says the company must be run by a member of the Kaiba family. While that was a huge plot point with Pegasus, turns out that Seto and Mokuba’s memories have been blended so thoroughly, like a very fine Shadow Realm smoothie, that they just...forgot.

And like I’m positive that Roland remembers, but Roland’s not gonna say something and accidentally reveal he’s the 4th Kaiba brother and have to get abducted all the time and actually work for a living. Anyways, they forgot why Pegasus abducted them in the first place in Season 1, and honestly, so did the writers of this season 4 years later. Not like it mattered, because if Seto and Mokuba did take Dartz to court, the world would end before their case would even start.

Which is how, after one talk with Roland, Seto and Mokuba just sort of laid prone on the metaphorical ground and let it wash over them that yes, KaibaCorp is gone.

I really like this extra-long helicopter, PS.

Both members of Kaiba’s Sunglasses Army decided to align themselves with Kaiba, although honestly, I don’t think anyone else in this company has realized that they’ve been bought. It happened...1 hour ago. Like what do you even do if your company randomly gets bought in the middle of a workday? Like no lead up, no indication, just BAM you’ve been bought?

And if Duke works for Pegasus who got bought out by Dartz and then Dartz bought Kaiba Corp-------What does that make Duke? Is he gonna have to start wearing sunglasses inside?

Anyway, Roland knows better than to tell Seto Kaiba he doesn’t work for him anymore while still in the same helicopter as Seto Kaiba, who already crashed one plane today and will crash yet another plane before this episode is through.

(read more under the cut)

Seto decides to align with Yugi since he needs to confront Dartz eventually. Which is when we find out that Seto always planned to align with Yugi and was just giving him a really hard time.

Because over the last several episodes, Seto has had an entire team at this random museum in Florida in order to take some pictures (that really should have already been on the internet but wtv, it was 2003 so maybe it wasn’t?)

It’s like most of the way through s4 and the biker ninjas still send me. How did he make SO MANY biker ninjas? At what point was Dartz like...and now...all my mooks...will be ninja bikers. Or orcs. Mostly Ninja bikers.

Did Alister or the others ever tell him “hey, Master Dartz, I get that your 10000 years old but like...do you not understand what a biker is?” and was Dartz like

“clearly bikers are the most evil thing in the world, obviously.” completely unaware that most bikers are just 45 year old accountants.

In these scenes we also get a gander at their laptops and, if you ever want to see high level life crippling OCD anxiety in picture form, it’s illustrated very clearly right here:

Not only did they draw this keyboard in 1 pt perspective, they used like a ruler to draw all those letters so they were the same size. Some artist put so much time getting this nice and crisp and smooth...and then this happened.

And I’m pretty sure they died after that. I’m pretty sure this scene killed an artist.

It’s at this point that Yami kinda puts two and two together and was like “WE BOUGHT PLANE TICKET’S, YOU ASSHOLES.”

(It’s been such a long time since we’ve seen Mokuba smile like this, and it’s because he’s been hiding the fact for So Many Episodes that he and his brother prepped like hours ago to get this huge dunk on the rest of the party. He just wants to dunk on them so bad. Look at him. His company was bought today. BUT he gets to spend time with his bro dunking.)

Serious question, will Delta refund your flight if the Great Leviathan appears in the sky and tries to eat your soul to reboot the world from the ground up?

Of course not. They will never refund your flight. Trick question.

We switch back over to Rebecca and Duke, who have been absent from this show for so long, I actually forgot what Duke’s name was and had to think for like...5 entire minutes until I remembered that his nickname sounds like a poop and I was like “oh man, what name of poop would it be???” and then I recalled “Dookie. Yes. His name is literally Dookie. Wow that took way too long!”

Then we start a story arc I’d to call “My Kingdom For a Sharpen Filter” where, much like King Lear, the Yugi crew splays themselves on a battle field just strewn with different ways to sharpen an image, but can’t for the life of them use any other one, but the one deep in the heart of what is now DartzCorp.

And so yes, we are going to fly to San Fransisco, hop into ye Olde KaibaCorp, and log into proto-Noah in order to read a language that Arthur Hawkins can already read.

This is nonsense, but they put it there because it’s something to do. And honestly, it’s not a card game, so I’m down for this change-up. Lets go visit a version of Noah’s brain. At least they won’t drop an orichalcos for the 12th episode in a row.

On the way, Seto decides to try and egg on Yugi.

This backfires as you expect it will because Yami doesn’t freakin care. Like he’s not Yugi, he doesn’t care who the King of Games is, he harnesses freakin Dark Magic. The Wizard never cares if he’s King Arthur or not, and in fact, he probably prefers it....

..................Except in that spinoff where they had Yugi as a reincarnation of King Henry VII.

...................................................never mind.

And then Seto Kaiba says this actual line and I just...

WH.

WHHH

WHAT?

This entire show is just watching Yugi desperately cling to his scary ass hobbies. The tagline of Yugioh is “1001 reasons to go back to school and get a real job.”

What does Kaiba think Yugi does when he’s not around? Does he actually think Yugi attends school or sleeps at night or works an actual job? Like...he thinks Yugi has...NO HOBBIES.

Very interesting insight into what Seto considers a hobby and not hobby.

Especially since this Yami, who spends most of his spare time farting around his scary ass brain castle and getting lost. Occasionally he is forced on a date with Tea and wipes minds. That’s it. That’s all the things Yami does outside of hobbies.

Anyway, what is Dartz doing during all of this?

After this, Dartz pulls back the literal curtains on this room to reveal these candles that each hold the soul of someone he’s murdered.

There are not NEARLY enough candles for this segment.

A very brave man to have candles littered on the floor when his hair is down to his ass and all of his mooks have floorduster coats.

I really want to know what the local arts and crafts store thought when Dartz strode in there and bought every single tiny styrafoam skull during the Halloween sale and was like “can I put souls in these? You sell the kind I can put souls in, right?” and then immediately pulled out like a dozen 50% off coupons like a complete asshole.

Anyway, using this candle hocus pocus, Dartz uses the Orichalcos powers to take advantage of something Yugi did in the first episode. We distantly recall there was a giant eyeball in the sky--turns out if you bust up the eyeball with, lets say, a card that has a dragon on it, the eyeball will explode into many tiny Orichalcos pieces that will fall all over planet Earth.

So apparently Yugi didn’t save anyone at all when he busted that eyeball, because he instead set in motion Dartz’ evil plan to eventually use these many tiny Orichalcos pieces like the one seen here, to kill the hell out of people.

Good job, Yugi. Too bad you missed the Actual Bakura.

In fact, actual Bakura is probably the only one who survived this incident because I guarantee that Ryou Bakura is too busy eating all the contents of his fridge out of stress. He’s probably opened his window at this point, seen the crazy lights in the sky and in the street and was like “Blooooooody nope nopenopenopenopenope” and just locked the windows and doors, turned up Hercule Poirot to max volume, and stuffed his face with cookies.

(Or biscuits, I guess.)

WELL.

I don’t know how to tally that.

Yugioh not only broke the tally I was using to measure the distance they spent commuting this season, it also broke the tally on the amount of people who have died on this children’s show.

That’s a really big number.

We’ve had real duel monsters for a couple weeks but youknow...this time they’re extra, extra, extra real. More so than the last times. Also they’re all Orichalcos versions of their cards so their extra edge now. They’re the hot topic versions of what were already pretty hot-topic ass cards.

MMM. We come full circle, back at a dock, a warehouse, and some huge ass boat.

Right where we belong. Where all friends meet, where we can all finally be one.

Yugioh found one of the only cities that has a very famous and tourist heavy pier/warehouse district in it just so the Yugi gang could finally feel comfortable in their natural habitat. HOWEVER, there’s just one tiny problem in this scene, and it’s that it’s not overlaid with the actual soundscape of a SF pier, which is that of 100000 screaming seals

youtube

I don’t have a seal problem, you have a seal problem.

Anyway, the only healthy adults here attempt to follow the children into danger but someone on the animation team was like “we just lost the keyboard drawing guy to that capslock! We cannot lose any more interns to a crowd scene with 9 people in it and 2 dead bodies!” and they uh...

And we immediately eject Roland and whoever that weird sunglasses guy is out of the script. Mokuba gave them a longing glance as they helicoptered away. Maybe because he missed his Dad stand-ins that he went through such efforts to call in the first place. Or more likely, because Mokuba would have preferred to be on that helicopter and far away from whatever the hell is going to go down on this dock.

Honestly the rest of Joey’s storyline this episode is him going rogue because of Mai rage, and it both comes out of nowhere and also seems very on point for him.

Meanwhile, Rebecca’s unbridled rage towards Yami Muto is still low key hilarious to me.

Witness the only character here who thinks Yami should suffer actual consequences and witness Yami just appear to not give a single damn about it.

Nearly spat out my own drink watching this.

The...

...police...

...exist in this universe?

Anyway, while Tristan and Tea try to locate a payphone to dial 911, Seto and Yugi decide to invade Seto’s own company by going through an elevator that you have to reach through the sewers.

Straight up I don’t think SF even has sewers. At least, not in the sense that you can walk in em like New York or Paris or other cities that have sewers. Our sewer systems are very small cuz we got something called “liquefaction” which means our ground is so soft (and artificial--a lot of the land is fake), that when there is an earthquake, certain parts of the city will...liquefy. It’s Terrifying. We kind of...avoid going and building underground except in certain stable places. (like even BART gives me the heebies.)

I just have a very strong distrust of basements, caves and other underground places in general and it’s not because of spiders, or ghosts or whatever, I’m just afraid of faultlines. It’s like having an active volcano, but you just don’t see it, and we haven’t had a Big One since 1989 so...any day now (I mean, 2020 has been such redic content, that I think we’re finally ready)

Again, Japan has way more intense Earthquakes than we do, and yet they have a billion underground subways and very, very tall buildings, so like, this is mostly a big cultural difference between the two of us. And the bedrock. They probably have better bedrock than we do (honestly, I just have no idea).

MASTER HACKER SKILLS.

Almost as good as that time he hacked into Pegasus’ company by dropping a satellite on it. I’m starting to think Seto actually doesn’t know how to use a computer.

Anyway, Seto is faced with...real cards, real monsters, indisputable evidence, and he decides, it’s time. It’s time to finally face facts.

So, while these two are just flinging cards around willy nilly, Tea and Tristan are ...actually talking to police.

4 seasons. They’re actually doing it.

Although, TBH, they probably should have gone to the Japanese Embassy first? Just throwing that out there.

Ah Yugioh, the only kids show around that tells you point blank not to trust cops. Timeless.

U.S

In some weird underground earthquake hazard, Rebecca proves that she is smarter than Seto Kaiba. She’s maybe even the smartest person on this show. Nice that we gave her nothing to do this season but pine over Yugi who is already taken by Tea who he is also not even dating.

Not that I love Rebecca or anything, I actually have a hard time with her voice, but like...they really dropped the ball on Rebecca.

If she does end up joining Kaiba corp as their back up Felicity Smoak while Seto just runs around aimlessly punching stuff that really is just offbrand Arrow but with cards. And with slightly less resurrections.

So, lets get a gander at that computer.

We didn’t get to see Kaiba pull out 12 other discs to complete the installation process for these all these Hard Discs. Maybe the lure of throwing a very aerodynamic CD across the room like a paper card was so strong that his dev team forced him to switch to these defunct squares?

PS, I am a true millennial, OK? But, I don’t remember Hard Discs.

Hard Discs were SO long go. I stopped using these damn things in Elementary school. The last Hard Disc I ever touched was in college, when I had to put my art portfolio on a disc to submit it to my degree. I don't know even why. Everyone had a mac, so I knew no one’s computer in the department even...HAD a disc drive so it was like...whomst among you has this damn computer from 1997? Whomst among you is still using Windows 95? WHY would I put IMAGES on a floppy when I can just email them to you?

Anyway, I had to get a USB hard disc reader, and to get that reader, I had to call my Dad who had legacy software because he’s a computer engineer, and he had to mail it to me.

In that same portfolio review, PS, I also had to submit my portfolio as slides.

I didn’t even know where to produce slides so I had to ask all these old people and go to the last photo processing store on earth to get digital pictures turned into negatives and then turned into freakin slides.

SLIDES.

I honestly think they just did that to weed people out of the art degree.

Anyway, I tell you this story just to say that there is no way in hell that Kaiba was using a hard disc during the height of the CD era. We were CD or go home since 2000. We had pretty decent jump drives at this point. We had wifi. It was realllly bad wifi, but we had it. Your phone could connect to the internet. It would charge you 50 bucks, but it COULD connect.

Who on the Yugioh team DID this?

Anyway lets see these pictures that for which, we spent thousands of dollars in unused plane tickets, destroyed a Caltrain, killed 2 ancient Atlanteans (and their dog), killed 3 random mid-villains, walked across the entire Peninsula, crashed an international plane, and left both the plane and the train to rot gas fuel into the nearest lake which is right next to a ghost graveyard?

Yeaaaaaaaaaah!

Like he reads it and is all “They’re gonna resurrect Atlantis” and it’s like WE KNOW. Dartz and his hooligans have talked about starting their Utopia to reboot the world since Gurimo. Since Day 1.

Man.

Anyways, there was one plus to the pictures, and it was that Seto Kaiba recognized the Oricalchos logo.

just...

The Oricalchos logo is...

...This logo, Seto?

You...didn’t recognize...seriously? Not until just now? You have been inside of this logo, rearing to lose your soul to Alister 2 times, and he only recognized it...just now.

I mean Seto takes a while y’all. He’s a genius, but his memory is so, so bad, that he will Eventually get smart, but you have to wait until like episode 24. But he’ll get there. Just gotta be patient.

And, when he saw it, he wigged out in a way I wasn’t prepared for.

Y’all I feel like I’ve seen to many weird zooms on Kaiba’s crotch in this show. Or just in life in general, especially after that surprise fic. That’s all.

I don’t know why everything exploded, but maybe the logo is cursed in the same way as God Cards? I dunno.

Anyway, this is when Dartz shows up with his brand new dog.

So they run outside onto the roof.

Now listen, does every Kaiba Corp building need the same weird ass roof? Is it like a McDonalds?

Because I’m just picturing this type of roof in SF and I’m having a time.

Forgive me if I made this lemming joke already. He’s just stood on a cliff’s edge so many times I can’t keep up.

RIP Dragon Jet, who took us from S3-S4, you’ll always live on in our memory, you glorious, wasteful, beautiful death trap.

Seto and Yugi are fine by the way, they just kinda jumped out, as you do when you’re an immortal god possessing a small boy and a...whatever the hell Seto is.

It’s at this point we reintroduce Valon because Joey went rogue and has decided to take on Dartz by himself. This is what happens when Tristan leaves the party. You always need Tristan to hold back Joey by his armpits to keep him from fighting random people.

So I guess Valon’s gonna die next episode. That’ll be nice.

What’s great about this show is each arc is just watching each villain die. You know they’ll die. But...how much?

Anyway, that’s all for today. I’m still drawing a hell ton of stuff so I don’t know when the next update will be...but just now I haven’t dropped off or something. I’ll...eventually get to it.

And if you just got here, this is a link to read all of these in chrono order.

Anyway, I mentioned Hercule Poirot, (because watching a hell ton of BBC was how I spent time with my family when I was a kid, and my very Southern Grandma freakin LOVED Hercule Poirot) So here is the best subplot of that show, which is David Suchet eating stuff.

And which doesn’t want to embed for some reason. Probs can’t embed more than one video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17antzzJrzQ

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buzzdixonwriter · 5 years

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Sci-Fi And The Sincerest Form Of Flattery

I know many of you prefer “science fiction” or “science fantasy” or “speculative fiction” or “sf” or even “stf” for short, but I ain’t that guy…

I’m a sci-fi kinda guy.

I prefer sci-fi because to me it evokes the nerdy playfulness the genre should embrace at some level (and, no we’re not gonna debate geek vs nerd as a descriptor; “geeky” implies biting heads off chickens no matter how benign and respectable the root has become).

. . .

A brief history of sci-fi films -- a very brief history.

Georges Melies’ 1898 short A Trip to The Moon is one of the earliest examples of the genre, and it arrived full blown at the dawn of cinema via its literary predecessors in Verne and Wells.

There were a lot of bona fide sci-fi films before WWII -- the Danes made a surprisingly large number in the silent era, Fritz Lang gave us Metropolis and Frau Im Mond, we saw the goofiness of Just Imagine and the spectacle of Things To Come and the space opera appeal of Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers.

And that’s not counting hundreds of other productions -- comedies and contemporary thrillers and westerns -- where a super-science mcguffin played a key part.

That came to a screeching halt in WWII primarily due to budget considerations and real world science easily overtaking screen fantasy. Still, there were a few bona fide sci-fi films and serials during the war and immediately thereafter, but it wasn’t until the flying saucer scare of the late forties that sci-fi became a popular movie genre again (and on TV as well).

Ground zero for 1950s sci-fi was George Pal’s Destination Moon, which was an attempt to show a plausible flight to the moon (it was actually beaten to the screens by a couple of other low budget movies that rushed into production to catch Pal’s PR wave for his film).

This led to the first 1950s sci-fi boom that lasted from 1949 to 1954, followed by a brief fallow period, then a larger but far less innovative second boom in the late 1950s to early 1960s.

BTW, let me heartily recommend the late Bill Warren’s magnificent overview of sci-fi films of that era, Keep Watching The Skies, a must have in any sci-fi film fan’s library.

Seriously, go get it.

Bill and I frequently discussed films of that and subsequent eras, and Bill agreed with my assessment of the difference between 1950s sci-fi and 1960s sci-fi: 1950s sci-fi most typically ends with the old order restored, while 1960s sci-fi typically ends with the realization things have changed irrevocably.

In other words, “What now, puny human?”

I judge the 1960s sci-fi boom to have started in 1963 (at least for the US and western Europe; behind the Iron Curtain they were already ahead of us) with the Outer Limits TV show, followed in 1964 by the films The Last Man On Earth (based on Richard Matheson’s I Am Legend), Robinson Crusoe On Mars, and The Time Travelers.

But what really triggered the 1960s sci-fi boom was Planet Of The Apes and 2001: A Space Odyssey. The former was shopped around every major Hollywood studio starting in 1963 until it finally found a home at 20th Century Fox (whose market research indicated there was an audience for well-made serious sci-fi film and hence put Fantastic Voyage into production). Kubrick, fresh off Lolita and Dr. Srangelove (another sci-fi film tho not presented as such), carried an enormous cache in Hollywood of that era, and if MGM was going to bankroll his big budget space movie, hey, maybe there was something to this genre after all.

From 1965 forward, the cinematic space race was on, with 1968 being a banner year for groundbreaking sci-fi movies: 2001: A Space Odyssey, Barbarella, Charly, Planet Of The Apes, The Power, Project X, and Wild In The Streets. (Star Trek premiering on TV in 1967 didn’t hurt, either.)

And, yeah, there were a number of duds and more than a few old school throwbacks during this era, but the point is the most interesting films were the most innovative ones.

Here’s a partial list of the most innovative sci-fi films from 1969 to 1977, nine-year period with some of the most original ideas ever presented in sci-fi films. Not all of these were box office successes, but damn, they got people’s attention in both the film making and sci-fi fandom communities.

=1969=

The Bed Sitting Room

Doppelganger (US title: Journey To The Far Side Of The Sun)

The Gladiators

The Monitors

Stereo

=1970=

Beneath The Planet Of The Apes [a]

Colossus: The Forbin Project

Crimes Of The Future

Gas-s-s-s

The Mind Of Mr. Soames

No Blade Of Grass

=1971=

The Andromeda Strain

A Clockwork Orange

Glen And Randa

The Hellstrom Chronicle

THX 1138

=1972=

Silent Running

Slaughterhouse Five

Solaris [b]

Z.P.G.

=1973=

Day Of The Dolphin

Fantastic Planet

The Final Programme (US title: The Last Days Of Man On Earth)

Idaho Transfer

=1974=

Dark Star

Phase IV

Space Is The Place

Zardoz

=1975=

A Boy And His Dog

Black Moon

Death Race 2000

Rollerball

Shivers (a.k.a. They Came From Within and The Parasite Murders) [c]

The Stepford Wives

=1976=

God Told Me To [a.k.a. Demon]

The Man Who Fell To Earth

=1977=

Wizards

[a] I include Beneath The Planet Of The Apes because it is the single most nihilistic major studio film released, a movie that posits Charlton Heston blowing up the entire planet is A Damn Good Idea; follow up films in the series took a far more conventional approach to the material. While successful, neither the studio nor mainstream audiences knew what to make of this film, so 20th Century Fox re-released it in a double bill with another problematic production, Russ Meyer’s Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls, and holy cow, if ever there was a more bugfuck double feature from a major studio I challenge you to name it.

[b] Other than Karel Zemen’s delightful animated films, Iron Curtain sci-fi films rarely screened in the US, with the exception of special effects stock shots strip mined to add production values to cheapjack American productions (looking at you, Roger Corman). Solaris is the exception.

[c] David Cronenberg made several other films in this time frame, but most of them were variations on the themes he used in Shivers, including his big break out, Scanners. Realizing he was repeating himself, Cronenberg reevaluated his goals and started making films with greater variety of theme and subject matter.

. . .

The astute reader will notice I bring my list to an end in 1977, a mere nine-year span instead of a full decade.

That’s because 1977 also saw the release of Close Encounters Of The Third Kind and Star Wars.

The effect was immediate, with knock-off films being released the same year.

1978 saw Dawn Of The Dead, a sequel to 1968’s Night Of The Living Dead, and Superman, the first non-campy superhero movie aimed at non-juvenile audiences.

1979 gave us Alien, Mad Max, and Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

These films were not just successful, they were blockbusters.

And none of them were original.

Close Encounters served as an excuse to do a Kubrick-style light show; plot and theme are about as deep as a Dixie cup, and of all the blockbusters of that era, it’s the one with no legs.

Alien’s pedigree can be traced back to It! Terror From Beyond Space (and It’s pedigree goes back to A.E. van Vogt’s “Black Destroyer” and “Discord In Scarlet” in the old Astounding Stories) and Demon Planet (US title: Planet Of The Vampires) by way of Dark Star (Dan O’Bannon writing the original screenplays for that film and Alien as well).

Mad Max, like 1981’s Escape From New York, differs from earlier post-apocalypse movies only insofar as their apocalypses of a social / cultural / political nature, not nuclear or biological weapons. Mad Max, in fact, can trace its lineage back to No Blade Of Grass, which featured it own caravan of refugees attacked by modern day visigoths on motorcycles, and the original Death Race 2000, as well as an odd little Australian non-sci-fi film, The Cars That Ate Paris.

Not only was Dawn Of The Dead a sequel, but it kickstarted a worldwide tsunami of zombie movies that continues to this day (no surprise as zombie films are easy to produce compared to other films listed here, and while there are a few big budget examples of the genre, the typical zombie movie is just actors in ragged clothes and crappy make-up).

Superman was…well…Superman. And Star Trek was Star Trek.

And the granddaddy of them all, Star Wars, was a cinematic throwback that threw so far back it made the old seem new again.

Not begrudging any of those films their success: They were well made and entertaining.

But while there had been plenty of sequels and remakes and plain ol’ knockoffs of successful sci-fi movies in the past, after these seven there was precious little room for anything really different or innovative.

1982’s E.T. was Spielberg’s unofficial follow-up to Close Encounters.

1984’s Terminator consciously harkened back to Harlan Elison’s Outer Limits episodes “Demon With A Glass Hand” and “Soldier” (not to mention 1966’s Cyborg 2087 which looks like a first draft of Cameron’s film)

All innovative movies are risky, and the mammoth success of the films cited above did little to encourage new ideas in sci-fi films but rather attempts to shoehorn material into one of several pre-existing genres.

Star Wars = space opera of the splashy Flash Gordon variety

Star Trek = crew on a mission (Star Trek: The Next Generation [+ 5 other series], Andromeda, Battlestar: Galactica [4 series], Buck Rogers In The 25th Century, Farscape, Firefly [+ movie], The Orville, Space Academy, Space Rangers, Space: Above And Beyond, plus more anime and syndicated shows than you can shake a stick at)

Superman = superheroes (nuff’ sed!)

Close Encounters / E.T. = cute aliens

Alien = not-so-cute aliens

Terminator = robots vs humans (and, yes, The Matrix movies fall into this category)

Escape From New York = urban post-apocalypse

Mad Max = vehicular post-apocalypse

Dawn Of The Dead = zombies

Mix and match ‘em and you’ve got a nearly limitless number of variations you know are based on proven popular concepts, none of that risky original stuff.

Small wonder that despite the huge number of new sci-fi films and programs available, little of it is memorable.

. . .

It shouldn’t be like this.

With ultra-cheap film making tools (there are theatrically released films shot on iPhones so there’s literally no barrier to entry) and copious venues for ultra-low / no-budget film makers to show their work (YouTube, Vimeo, Amazon Prime, etc.), there’s no excuse for there not to be a near limitless number of innovative films in all genres.

But there isn’t.

I watch a lot of independent features and short films on various channels and streaming services.

They’re either direct knock-offs of current big budget blockbusters (because often the film makers are hoping to impress the big studios into giving them lots of money to make one of their movies), or worse still, deliberately “bad” imitations of 1950s B-movies (and I get why there’s an appeal to do a bad version of a B-movie; if you screw up you can always say you did it deliberately).

Look, I understand the appeal of fan fic, written or filmed.

And I get it that sometimes it’s easier to do a knock-off where the conventions of the genre help with the final execution.

But let’s not make deliberate crap, okay?

Oscar Wilde is quoted as saying “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” but he was quoting somebody else, and that wasn’t the whole original quote.

Wilde was quoting Charles Caleb Colton, a dissolute English clergyman with a passion for gambling and a talent for bon mots.

Colton’s full quote: “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.”

Don’t be mediocre.

Be great.

#science fiction #sci-fi #1960s #1970s #movies #Bill Warren #Keep Watching The Skies

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shijiujun · 5 years

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history3 ep10 summary - POOR SHAO FEI AND TANG YI BB, this is what heartbreak looks like

I JUST ABOUT DIED. I DID. THE LAST PART WAS MAD - just this 30 seconds alone carried the entire fucking episode

We are at the halfway mark - Part of me doesn’t want it to end at all but I need to see the birthday cake and domestic scenes ASAP!! Currently I’m just enjoying the ride and so glad we get to see Chris and Jake and Andy and Kenny and everyone of those other hot and excellent actors in this show. I’ve never done a GIF or subtitled in all my years on tumblr before History3 - life changing this is what this show is and I’m so happy we’re all doing this together! Let’s make it through the halfway mark together omgosh excited guys!!!!!

Shopping scene with Shao Fei + Hong Ye: Hong Ye is telling SF to walk faster they go into a department store and she keeps changing clothes OMG LOL THEY ARE SO CUTE TGT!!! She wears smth with ruffles and then asks SF how it looks and then he’s like ‘why do u look like a seaweed’ and she’s like ‘who’s a seaweed you’re a seaweed’ and then she dances LOL and then LOL HE FELL ASLEEP WHILE SHOPPING WITH HER AND LOST HER omg Shao Fei seriously

They’re playing a game on the escalator this is the funniest shit and OF COURSE she brings him to a lingerie shop and omg Shao Fei so poor thing just sits there and OMG YAS HONG YE SISTER-BROTHER RIVALRY and she buys him UNDERWEAR and she’s like “hang on a second, this is too big for you, you need a smaller one” LOL BURN

Carpark/shooting scene: They’re almost like friends or something, although later after we see the hong ye and bodyguard ah de scene you’ll realise why she was speaking to shao fei like that (because she knew smth was going to happen and she thought everything was going to go to plan but who knew they were coming with guns) and anw, then the bullets start going off and shao fei protects her with all of his body like OH MY GOD - And wow the angle of the shot and how it struck SF is totally wrong and omggg this scene was faster than I thought JESUS CHRIST - is it just me or did Shao Fei get hit on the wrong side? Either they missed a scene or the bullet came from elsewhere

and then we get the scene of tang yi storming into the hospital and he goes straight for hong ye first, hugs her as she cries etc. and then hot doctor is there and when hot doctor is NOT SMILING YOU KNOW SHIT IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN - anyway, the nurse tells hot doctor that the surgery has been prepped, and then hot doctor nods and says ‘let’s go’ - and that’s when tang yi REMEMBERS AND LOOKS UP - “is that for meng shao fei?” And his look of absolute regret is ridiculous

and hot doctor just somberly nods

Police chief STILL DOESNT KNOW THAT SHAO FEI HAS BEEN SHOT omg he’s going around doing his usual shit and everyone is clearing shit with him and fuck he misses shao fei so much I like that they finally show that shao fei is useful in the office and everyone is dependent on him and then suddenly Yu Qi turns up because she somehow got the call that shao fei is in the hospital

Oh goddddd Tang Yi’s face as he sits there AND LOL Dao yi (glasses guy) knows police chief quite well he called him Brother Bao, and tells him to calm down and they will take care of everything but POLICE CHIEF AINT HAVING NONE OF THAT BULLSHIT he pushes dao yi aside and this is one of the only times he can legit grab a mob boss by the neck and not get shot at after - police chief loves Shao Fei so much you can tell he totally lost it and Hong Ye genuinely feels bad and she’s saying sorry over and over to him as tang yi sits there catatonic - tang yi is totally quiet

also not sure if you guys caught it but the older guy in the investigative team, the one who always kind of says smth subtly bad about shao fei, he shot a look to bodyguard ah de when police chief was confronting tang yi in the hospital - they are totally up to something, corrupt police!!!!

The rest of the investigative team - LOL Zhao zi: “wow I’ve never seen police boss chief grab someone so much larger than him by the neck” - Yu Qi really likes Shao Fei, she’s crying by herself at the stairs and police chief is the one who’s standing by Shao fei’s door the moment he’s out of surgery and he scoffs “what ‘they’ll take care of everything’? the moment they heard shao fei was going to pull through they all left’- he tells zhao zi that they’ll start investigating who the fuck was behind the shooting and reminds them all to be careful

Captain Shi: “those who dare to touch any one from the investigative team, I’ll bring them all back to the police station!!!!”

OMG WE GET THE SCENE WHERE TANG YI IS HOTLY WALKING AND RIPPING OFF HIS JACKET AND OH JESUS CHRIST BRASS KNUCKLES?!!! Anw here’s the gem oh my god: Tang yi comes in where the culprit is already seated and he tells everyone to get the fuck out (OMG YOU KNOW HE MEANS BUSINESS)

Ah De is like ‘boss, this is a small thing, let me do it’ - and he’s so damn insistent on interrogating the culprit himself even though tang yi is literally ready to set fire on the bitch you know and i’m like AH DE THAT IS SO NOT SMART YOU WANNA DIE?!

and well, we all called it - tang yi hears that and he’s like wtf and he gets mad, hauls bodyguard ah de off his feet and slams him against the wall and yells: “SMALL THING?! HE TOUCHED MY PEOPLE, AND YOU CALL IT A SMALL THING?!”

and bodyguard is like fuckkkk: “yes i’m sorry boss, i said the wrong thing, i’ll leave now”

and then he goes out and hovers by the door while tang yi puts on his brass knuckles and starts punching the dude who is yelling a bit like... not realistically HAHAHAHA - and omg Jack hit it right on the nail, he asked Brother De why he looks so worried and ‘jokingly’ asks, “why, do u know the person inside?” And Brother De is so angry and defensive - jack totally knows what is up

Brother de and Hong Ye meet up and here we find out that they ordered the hit on shao fei in a sense to get rid of him - they wanted to show tang yi that shao fei can’t protect anyone and then chase him away, but they were supposed to come teach shao fei a lesson with like wooden sticks and not guns - hong ye was a bit stunned by that as well and she asked ah de like wtf did you really want to kill me?! and ah de is like confused also, he doesn’t really know how the plan went wrong?! and hong ye is like, whatever, i will cooperate with you only up to here, if tang yi manages to get any answers, it’s all on you (like not cool hong ye, tang yi would totes forgive you if you just admitted it i think)

anyway, switch to the balcony scene with tang yi and jack, where jack asks who it was that ordered the hit, and tang yi says: “chen wen hao”

okay so my theory is that maybe chen wen hao really has smth to do with this - he kind of derailed the plan and changed it to legitly wanting to kil hong ye and shao fei (more hong ye than shao fei more likely) - but right now they dont know it they just think that they’re safe and their story checks out

Okay so Hong Ye and Dao Yi - Gosh she’s kind of a brat but I get where she’s coming from. anyway she leaves brother de and then dao yi is waiting for her in the carpark - the man knows he way better than she knows herself, and i think he knows that she had something to do with the shooting, but he didn’t say anything except to hint that she better leave shao fei up to tang yi and stop trying to interfere. hong ye is adamant that shao fei is a different kind of person from them, and dao yi is like: “that’s for the boss to decide. the way he treats him... shao fei is different to him”

OH MY GOD THANK YOU SOMEONE SAYING IT AS IT IS FINALLY NO MORE SUBTLE LOOKS AND SMILES SOMEONE SAID IT

and anw, hong ye manages to make this entire thing about her and how dao yi doesn’t love her - sister, i really get you and dao yi really needs to get his shit together, but srsly, a man just got shot for you because you were unhappy with his presence - and gosh unrequited (actually requited) love, but i get her in this part

but seriously, i get that she want shao fei out of the way but they way she did it was totally wrong, does she not know that tang yi is soft for him and cares for him like he has no one else before? she was willing to hurt him to make a point, and then ah de is - gosh dude get a grip

AND OMGGGGGG TANG YI’S FACE AS HE IS BY SHAO FEI’S BEDSIDE - this is what heartbreak looks like guys, he looks like he’s saying goodbye and his fucking expression - wow Chris did a fucking good job he totally looks heartbroken and as if shao fei died or smth, he’s holding his hand and air-tracing his nose and he looks like he’s going to cry - HE REALLY LOVES HIM GUYS - the emotion was really right on point

(and lol the chinese audience - they were scolding tang yi during the first part of the ep because he didn’t seem to have much of a reaction to shao fei’s injury and then when the last part came everyone went BATSHIT CRAZY)

what the fuck is going to happen next episode? i ask, but i know already - tang yi is getting ready to say goodbye to shao fei and push him away because he realised how dangerous it is for shao fei to be around him BUT OUR FAVE CHARACTERS WILL FIND SOME WAY TO BE TOGETHER AGAIN NO WORRIES I DOUBT THEIR BREAKUP WILL LAST MORE THAN AN EP

#history 3: 圈套 #history3圈套 #history 3: trapped #history3: trap #history3 spoilers #summary

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brianjpatterson · 7 years

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SPOTLIGHT: My relationship to failure

If you’re just joining Spotlight, then this is my personal journal of my personal journey as a performer. It’s a kind of way for me to look back on all of my experiences, and lessons I’ve learned, while simultaneously sharing what I’ve learned with you. Disclaimer: The word PERSONAL was utilized twice in the first sentence. Therefore, this is not the gospel or the truth, it’s just me sharing MY experiences in an effort to assist, if possible, in other people’s discovery (end disclaimer). Today, I’m taking a small break from my A+B=C method which focuses on “Brian’s B’s” (Being, Behavior, and Business), to talk about something that I think we all encounter….FAILURE.

I post a lot about success and achievement in this blog site in the form of strategies I have developed, and even my own wins. Recently, I had been feeling like a very big failure. Therefore, today, I’m going to talk to you about my failures. My failures far outperform my successes, and couple of weeks ago I was feeling out of sorts, and had been feeling that way for about a week or so. The day I started writing this, I ended up going to the gym, doing a Zumba class, and afterwards listening to Jem & the Holograms’ “We Can Change It” on repeat (because it’s one of the most positive and uplifting songs I’ve ever heard…Not only that, but it takes me back to a much simpler time in my life, and always puts a smile on my face). So there I was listening to Jem, while doing what I call a “White Boy Workout”. You know, the kind where you lift the heaviest weights possible and angry grunt a lot. White boys, please don’t be offended. As the late, great Joan Rivers said, “It’s a fucking joke!” lol :) At any rate, I often do that kind of workout when I’m letting off steam, and I REALLY needed to let off some steam because I was feeling like a complete and total failure. Why? Well, let me give you some details to set up my current situation. It started with a list of unfortunate events at the end of 2016. First, the big named clients for whom I normally worked, and who provided me with over 70% of my annual income, were not hiring for 2017. I also found out in mid-2017 that they weren’t going to be hiring for the second year in a row. Second, my assistance from said jobs had expired at the end of 2017. Third, my agent, who provided the remainder/other portion of my income (and with whom I’d been signed for the last nine years), decided to shut down the agency and close their doors for good. Fourth, around this time multiple members of my family were contacting me in a near desperate state because my other parent was also experiencing what were percieved as a potential major health concern. Fifth, and last but not least, my living situation had become even more toxic…again (that’s an entire essay in itself, and one I’ll save for another day). The culmination of all these things forced me to make a very big change in my life, which was to move from the nest I’d created for myself over the last 14 years in San Francisco, and try a new market. So I packed up my things, and headed for Los Angeles to live with my adoptive brother. Now I am in a new market, where no one knows me, and no one knows my work history, talents, or my work ethic. Not to mention, I had to utilize my savings and have also accumulated a bit of debt over the past two years just trying to survive and stay afloat. This brings me to my situation from a few weeks ago where I was feeling kind of lost and alone, and without any income or upcoming work. For all intents and purposes, I’m essentially completely starting over in my life in nearly every way. Needless to say, I have been feeling like a GIANT failure. In addition, after reviewing my annual business plan only days before, I reviewed my list of goals. By nature they should take me to the next level of my career, but I am now living in a place where I’m a nobody and can’t see how to achieve these new goals. This for me highlighted the fact that I was once again a giant failure in life…period. Yet, there’s that word ‘once again’. I have been here before, and I’m willing to bet that many others have either felt like this, or have also been in similar situations; Especially other performers. So how do I (we) transform my (our) failures into successes? I’m guessing the answer lies in failing some more.

FAIL MORE TO ENDURE

In a previous post, where I discussed my approach to making a living as an actor, I mention that statistically the average performer (specifically actor) only books 10% of every thing for which they might audition. Utilizing this statistic against the average day rate of pay for the market in which I lived (San Francisco), I calculated that I would need to attend approximately 25-30 auditions per month just to break even on monthly expenses. Keep in mind if you look at this another way, this would mean that I would be failing to book approximately 23-27 times EACH MONTH! That means over the last 7 years, I failed to book a job over 1,900 times. Many of them were very VERY good paying jobs that could’ve taken me many other places. To exemplify, there were approximately 4 big budget SAG national commercials in that mix, all of them paying what would have been the equivalent of my annual salary. I was placed on a hold/check avail for all of them…and I booked none of them; Failed. I won’t even go into detail about the network tv show for which I was being strongly considered. Long story short, the director received my name and resume from a mutual friend, but after reviewing my materials, he said that he “wouldn’t waste putting me in a supporting role”; Failed! Yes, that’s only a couple of examples to help illustrate how my failures have far outweighed my successes. But much like my equation for breaking even on monthly expenses while living in San Francisco, the equation for success is similar. Failing a lot ensures achieving at least 10% success from failures. So I have to go out there and fail s’more! Why? Well, first off it’s how we build durability.

The very first audition I attended was in Pittsburgh, PA and it was for a toothpaste commercial. I had just been introduced to theatre in high school, and was performing in the spring musical for the first time. I went into the audition and naturally I totally BOMBED IT! I was completely horrible and even though I felt as though I was invincible, I had absolutely NO IDEA what I was doing. Needless to say, I didn’t get the job, and I knew it as soon as I left the audition room. I cried for the longest time and didn’t attend an audition again for probably a year. Which of course was next year’s school spring musical audition. While in high school I built up a small ability to endure these auditions and it got stronger and stronger each year. Cut to twenty five years later, I now find the audition process to be a normal thing. Although I still experience nerves, it’s become normal and natural for me and I’ve built up a kind of inoculation to it where I can navigate it much better. I’ve built up a durability to it. Durability is one of the coolest after effects of failing often. The more we fail, the more durable we become so that things don’t have such a crippling effect on us.

FAIL MORE TO MASTER

Another great after effect of more failures, is mastery and/or learning. For this, I always think of one example in particular. I was on set with another actor one day and he was talking about things that inspired him, and how many actors often aren’t very good in their early years. He used the example of Eva Longoria, and he claimed that she wasn’t very good during her early soap opera days. I stopped him and asked him if he knew about the conditions under which soap opera actors operate. He admitted he didn’t know, and so I told him. A lot of the time, soap opera actors are given scripts merely minutes or hours before shooting. This can also sometimes be true of many other episodic television as well. The business side of much of entertainment operates so quickly that it doesn’t always leave the adequate space or room for in depth actor preparation. Specifically soap operas. So when he saw Eva Longoria, he saw someone who was probably new to the business and hadn’t had practice operating under those kinds of circumstances. After hearing this, the actor with whom I was working, better understood the circumstances under which Eva was operating (EVERYONE has different circumstances in life, and it’s always great to keep this in mind). This was a great example of someone who failed in order to master. Once Ms. Longoria had an understanding of the system, she knew how to work with it and even began mastering it. This was evident in her work on other shows in the future as she really kicked some ass on screen!

I have failed like that in many ways. The only difference is that I used San Francisco as my training ground for a lot of it. A few of the things I was mediocre at during the beginning of my stay in SF were: acting for the camera (I started in theatre so everything started too big), TelePrompTer, stunts for camera, and voiceover. When I first began each of these I sucked ass. I was horrible, but I kept working on each of them and became good. Some came easier than others, but I knew getting good was important because by the time I got back to LA I would need to be ready and prepared to work. My previous experience of LA was that the city and entertainment industry was a business and those who were actually working wanted to work with people who could work at their level and could contribute to efficiency and profitability. That means a mastery of job skills. Right now the skill I’m learning is moving to a new market. I’m in the early phases, and I’m failing (EPICALLY) at the moment, but I’m slowly learning how to master it. After I’ve mastered it, I’ll be ready to do the next step, which I believe, is to climb that ladder of success!

FAIL MORE TO CLIMB

Once we are able to build up durability and master our skills, we can then more effectively and efficiently climb the ladder of success. The ladder of success is often a difficult climb without strength, durability, grit, thorough skills, and developed talents. Usually, when ascending any kind of ladder, each step is more and more challenging; Requiring more evolved skills and responsibilities. But know that the more you fail, it’s very likely that you’ll be able to climb faster and easier.

CONCLUSION

Personally, I work hard, which means that I also fail hard. Every time that you see one of my successes, that often (but not always) means I’ve failed exponentially just to get there. In the past, I have failed many many times. I’ve failed at auditions, I’ve failed at tasks, and I’ve even failed at achievement. Currently, I’m failing in a major way in my transition into a new market. However, failure is a natural part of the equation for success. We often think that failures are the end all and be all of our endeavors. However, that mindset prevents us from gaining many of it’s benefits. Because, in fact, the sooner we can perceive and internalize the benefits of failure, the better. The more we fail, learn from our failures, and build up our durability to failures, the sooner we can climb the ladder of success. So I invite you all to look at failure through this lens. Change your conversation about it. Because it’s then, that you can watch failure work in your favor!

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krismousejoy-blog · 5 years

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Food Fight: The Love and the Strife (Part 1)

The Last Five Years. Look at that! Only a theatre nerd like me would get a kick out of making life parallels with musicals. But seriously, the last five years have been life altering in such a divergent way. My little stream of life is now flowing in the opposite direction.

It all started at local Mexican restaurants. I was a regular at both Celia’s and Palo Alto Sol on any given Friday night. I wouldn’t say that they offered the best or the most authentic Mexican food, but they absolutely hit the spot. No question. Solid comfort Mexican food that was affordable and made for a good date night spot. I absolutely love mole poblano and they did a pretty good job with theirs. Warm, spicy, creamy chocolaty saucy goodness. Yes, please! Just briefly describing it now makes my mouth salivate. If only I could have that flavor in my mouth for a moment! Simple joy. I am going somewhere with this story, I promise. Food memories (and food in general) just derail me sometimes. It’s life, what can I say!?!

So what all happened there?

It started slowly with minor stomach pains - the feeling of eating too much, too quickly. Nothing that a little Pepto Bismol couldn’t handle. At first. The weeks went by and the pains worsened, but it seemed only after eating at my favorite Mexican staples. I didn’t understand what was happening.

I grew up on Mexican food. It was not uncommon for me to consume it every day, for multiple meals. And I never grew tired of it. I even prided myself on the heat I could take in my chilies. The hotter the better! Bring on the fire, bring on the tears. My Friday evening treat rituals turned into weekends in bed, in complete suffering and loss. It got so bad that I couldn’t sit comfortably in the car after leaving the restaurant. My stomach would swell to the point where I looked like I was a solid 8 months pregnant, coupled with shooting, stabbing, twisting and jabbing pains; it was an awful experience. Something was going terribly wrong and changing within me. Pardon for being overly dramatic, but I was devastated over this. Food is culture. When you grow up identifying with a particular culture and then something out of your control forces you out of that culture, you experience a true sense of loss. I felt like I was being exiled from my sense of place, my home, my life.

I was determined, however, to continue trying to eat. I thought - maybe it’s some new spice they’ve added to their recipes? But as time went on these terrible episodes extended beyond those two restaurants. It seemed to be happening every time I had any Mexican food - or a combination of those traditional ingredients. The curious side of me started to do some personal investigation with my food. I started withholding things from my dishes - no sauteed onions, no raw onions, no raw peppers, etc. I went to mild salsas or requested to hold the heat in the dishes. (Truly sad moments when your heart and mouth crave those flavors.) It became evident, relatively quickly, that I had a problem with onions. No! They are such a wonderful powerhouse of flavor and a staple in most dishes - Mexican or not. I used to eat them like apples as a child. (I’m not kidding.) How could my body all of a sudden not be able to handle these delicious and quite nutritious bulbs?

I started to research the differences between allergy and intolerance. When Benadryl helped to ease the swelling and calm the pain, I began to realize that my body was developing a food allergy. However, I wasn’t positive or in my heart convinced. I didn’t want it to be true. I just kept thinking that this was a phase, something that was randomly bothering me and that I would just “kick”. But I did what seemed best and most reasonable and started avoiding onions in everything.

That seemed to work for a little bit. And then - SURPRISE - more swelling and pain. Now what?

Even by withholding the onions, I would have further such episodes. Complete debilitating stomach pain. The kind that even the fetal position, heat pads, and a slew of supposed stomach pain medications wouldn’t bring relief. Even the Benadryl wasn’t really helping. However, I was still not willing to accept this body shift within me. I kept making mental excuses - I’m stressed, I’ve eaten too much, I’ve eaten too many varied foods in the meal, too rich of food, etc. You name it, I claimed the excuse. I didn’t want my life of food to change.

I LOVE food. I hate the term “foodie”, but for the lack of a better representation, I fit the bill. I am most definitely not a food “snob”, though I love and value the fine dining experience and truly appreciate every ingredient and the responsibility behind its source and inclusion. I LIVE TO TASTE. I felt that I was losing grip on such a huge part of my being - like sand through a sieve.

And then it HAPPENED. The slap in the face, punch to the nose, brutal WAKE-UP CALL TO REALITY.

As I mentioned, I was already carrying around Benadryl with me to counter the responses my body was experiencing with food. I had a business lunch at a newer Thai restaurant in San Francisco. It was a significant moment for me because it was one of the first business deal lunches I had arranged. I ordered some coconut soup and asked if there was onion in the broth. I was told no. So I didn’t ask for it to be noted to ensure that onion was withheld from the dish. When the soup arrived, it had green onions sprinkled on top as a garnish. I didn’t want to make a fuss at the lunch and send the soup back, so I figured that I would just eat around the garnish. I wasn’t consuming them - I should be fine. Right? You guessed it. Wrong! Within a few spoonfuls I could tell something wasn’t right. I started feeling my body temperature rise, I felt flush. My neck muscles began to clench. I looked at my colleague and she instantly knew something was WRONG. I was flooded with thoughts. I didn’t want the embarrassment of making a scene. So I reached into my purse grabbed several Benadryl pills, quickly swallowed them down and excused myself from the table. I indicated that I wasn’t feeling well and that I would return to the office leaving my colleagues to handle the lunch alone. As I walked the few SF blocks back to the office, the chest pressure and wheezing began to intensify. I just kept thinking - I’ll be ok, I’ll be ok! I just needed to get back to the office to rest. When I got to the office, my breathing was heavy and strained. I laid down on the couch and just tried to remain calm. I didn’t want to make such a fuss by calling the paramedics. I just kept thinking that the feeling would pass. The amount of Benadryl I took made me very drowsy and I obviously went to sleep because I was awakened by my colleagues returning to the office with concern in their eyes. I was fortunate. Very fortunate. At that moment I realized my INCREDIBLE STUPIDITY. That situation could have ended far differently. (For anyone reading this - do NOT do what I did. If you begin to experience changes to your breathing, call 911. Do not wait. You do not know how fast things can change in your body and seconds matter. More on this later.)

That was IT for me. My mind caved to the reality that my body had changed and I needed to get help. The next day I made an appointment with an allergist through Stanford Hospital and it was the start of a whole new life program.

Sweet, caring, and swift-acting Dr. T performed a skin scratch test along with blood work and determined that was indeed ALLERGIC to not only onions, but peppers, tree nut and...corn! (Among a few other things.) It all made sense. Even though I was avoiding onions, I was still having episodes because I was still being exposed to these other allergens. She prescribed me my first EpiPen and told me that I needed to do my due diligence and remove all these foods from my diet. She said she wanted me reading packaging labels, researching ingredient listings and ensuring my food didn’t come in contact with these foods.

I felt like the foundation of my life had crumbled from beneath me and I was thrust into a whole new world, a world that looked scary and dark; I was honestly frightened.

Little did I know that this would be the TIP of the ICEBERG.

As I said, it’s been five years and there is much to tell of my experiences. I know that I am not alone in these, but the more people share, the more is out there for people to learn from, connect to and build a community of support around. That’s why I have decided to put myself out there.

#food allergies #food #sanfrancisco #mexican food #food is culture

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samuelfields · 6 years

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Risk Tolerance Is Difficult To Accurately Measure Until You Start Losing Big Money

I’d like to think that I’d be able to stay the course and go all-in during a stock market downturn like everybody I meet on the internet, but I’d be lying to myself.

Experiencing rapid losses in 2000 as a 23-year-old freaked me out. Therefore, I sold all my after-tax internet and tech stocks within two months after the downturn began because I was losing roughly $5,000 a week. In the end, I lost about 10% from the peak. If I hadn’t sold, I would have lost around 65% over a two year time period. What’s worse, I would have had to wait until Aug 1, 2013 to get back to even! Can you imagine sitting on dead money for 13 years?

Between 2000 – 2013 I continued to max out my 401(k) and buy stocks. But I didn’t have the foresight to go all-in on August 1, 2002 when the NASDAQ bottomed. Instead, I mostly hoarded cash and bought 4.5% yielding CDs as I moved from NYC to San Francisco in 2001. The last people to join a company tend to be let go.

Seeing how violently stocks corrected between 2000 – 2002 made me gun shy to ever bet the farm again. Instead, I bought San Francisco property in 2003, 2005, 2007 (Tahoe, oops), and 2014 because it felt so much better to have a physical asset instead of a paper asset.

After the financial crisis of 2008 – 2009, I again didn’t step up to the plate and buy large amounts of stock or property between 2009 – 2011. All I did was continue to max out my 401(k) and make sure I didn’t get laid off. I became disillusioned with the financial services industry and wanted out. Therefore, I ended up hoarding more cash to give me options just in case I decided to take a leap of faith, which I did.

It wasn’t until August, 2012 that I bought 12X more stock than my normal cadence due to a severance windfall. I viewed my severance as the house’s money, so I figured why not risk it all and see if I could make more in the future. With my non-severance cash flow, I remained conservative.

Despite feeling like we were out of the woods by 2014, I still couldn’t invest aggressively in the stock market. I was again fearful of losing money. Instead, I decided to buy a SF fixer in 2014 because it felt like there was some serious mispricing of SF ocean view property. But the other reason why I bought was because I wanted to reduce my housing expense by renting out my old place.

Still Concerned Today

After selling a SF rental home in the summer of 2017 in order to simplify life, I decided to invest ~$1.2M of the ~$1.8M net proceeds in stocks and bonds. I had already taken risk exposure down by $800,000 by getting rid of the mortgage.

Everything had been going pretty well since August 2017 when I first opened up the account. Then February and March 2018 beat me up.

Even though I “only” lost $22,968.82 in February and $25,361.72 in March, there was a time in February where I was down around $50,000. February was a month that had a violent drop and then recovery. But March ended the month at a low. See the chart below.

Losing $50,000 in a couple weeks in just one out of eight investment accounts I track on Personal Capital made me seriously reassess my risk tolerance. When I was down $50,000, I became demotivated to do any work. For example, being offered $1,000 to sponsor a podcast episode just made me depressed because it let me know I’d have to put in serious hours to recoup all my losses.

I also wanted to start spending money on something before the stock market took all my capital away.

Overall, my mood soured as I cursed myself for taking on excess risk I didn’t need. Things had been going so great in December 2017 and January 2018. I should have sold in January when the market started going parabolic, but I didn’t because I was greedy. I also started to regret selling my former home, despite all the maintenance and tenant headaches.

The only positive this year is that I invested another $175,000 in the market in February to take advantage of the sell-off. But I invested $0 in March because I was too scared of what the future might hold.

Then I looked over to my RealtyShares account where I had invested $550,000 of my house sale proceeds. Ah, no change in principle with modest earnings to date. It felt so nice in comparison, even though the real figure to focus on is the Capital Returned portion of my 14 equity investments. But that will have to wait for several more years.

What I realized after reviewing my RealtyShares dashboard is that I really don’t like volatility. It’s nice to see my stock and bond account go up, but the feeling of loss is at least 2X worse than the feeling of joy when I make money. Instead, I’d much rather have a very stable capital account with a monthly dividend payment so I can focus on writing and spending time with family.

Here’s hoping my real estate crowdfunded investments do indeed return 10% – 15% a year for five years.

Don’t Overestimate Your Risk Tolerance

Look, I know it’s easy to feel like an investing guru in a bull market. Especially if you only started investing a significant amount of capital since the financial crisis. But trust me when I tell you that your confidence to “stay the course” and “buy when there’s blood on the streets” is misguided.

When there is blood on the streets, you will be worried about losing your job or your customers. If you have leverage due to a mortgage, your equity will get zapped away. You will logically go into survival mode and start preserving capital to protect yourself from misfortune.

During a recession, maxing out your 401(k) or IRA, pre-tax retirement accounts you can’t touch without a penalty until 59.5 is easy. This is where everybody needs to stay the course. It’s taking a step beyond and risking significant amounts of capital in your after-tax investment accounts when the markets are going down every day that is extremely hard.

Maybe everything is relative, and those telling me to “stay the course” are simply maxing out their 401(k)’s to the tune of $18,500 a year and not referring to investing multiple times extra in after-tax investment accounts. No matter. Right now, I fear having to go back to work full-time to provide for my family more than anything else.

Evaluating Your Risk Tolerance

Here are some questions you should ask yourself to discover your risk tolerance.

* What percentage of your annual salary or annual expenses are you willing to lose before you start getting extremely uncomfortable? My answer: six months worth of expenses.

* How much longer are you willing to work to make up for any large losses? My answer: three months.

* How much time are you willing to spend away from your family? My answer: no more than three days a year for the first five years.

* Have you been laid off before? If so, chances are higher than average you will be laid off again during the next recession. My answer: yes, but on my terms with a severance.

* How much in after-tax capital did you put to work during the 2000 and 2008 financial meltdowns? My answer: not much at all besides maxing out my 401(k).

* Did your losses in 2008-2009 equate to more than a year’s salary? My answer: yes, many years worth.

* If you lose your job and 40% of your investable assets, do you have enough liquidity and alternative income streams to hold you over for at least a year? My answer: yes, although my alternative income streams will likely decline.

* Does your mood tend to follow the market’s ups and downs? My answer: there is a stronger correlation on the downside.

* Do you confuse brains with a bull market? My answer: all the time.

Whatever you think your risk tolerance is, take it down by 50% and that is more likely your real risk tolerance. Being overly confident is extremely dangerous when it comes to investing.

Why Stocks May Be A Better Investment For Some Investors

Recommended Net Worth Allocation By Age Or Work Experience

Readers, do you think younger investors are underestimating their risk tolerance? How can we get people to realize they aren’t as risk tolerant as they believe? Are you an internet investing genius?

The post Risk Tolerance Is Difficult To Accurately Measure Until You Start Losing Big Money appeared first on Financial Samurai.

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mcjoelcain · 6 years