#years after my birth im finally finding out the genuine joy of making friends

[echo-s-land]

Someone told me that he 'like hanging around with me' and he 'love my smile' today

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 8

a/n: okay so since my halloween special was a flop ill write this instead but uwuwuwuwu its also my birthday today so hehe this is kinda a special request too :D

WAIT YOU GUYS THIS IS TOTALLY IRRELEVANT IF YOURE NOT A POTTERHEAD BUT OMG I SHARE THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS SIRIUS BLACK LIKE WHAT :”) I THINK I SAVED A COUNTRY IN MY PAST LIFE OR SOMETHING :”)

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- IF IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY! omg :0 i think we can all agree that the ramen shop will get GOOD BUSINESS that day. but it was a total surprise when the upperclassmen basically JUMP you after exiting your last class. vball practice? deliberately cancelled cuz today is YOUR day. kyo leading you, iwa making sure your eyes are closed while oikawa keeps teasing you on how you’re letting a group of men take you BLIND (cue the PUNCH). your smile is worth the XXX amount spent c,:

LOOK HOW CUTE MATTSUHANA ARE IN THIS LIKE OMG ITS LIKE IWAOI SPIRIT SWITCHED W THEIRS AND NOW IWAOI HAVE TO PULL THEM APART INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND

okay yay happy birthday to me uwu

i kinda put this request off since my borfday was right around the corner so hahaha to the anon who requested this, here it is!!!

okay anyways!!!

so today is your borfday

obvs this could be any day lmao it doesnt have to be today but it can be any day just pretend the calendar was different lmao

you were born today and your parents and natsu obvs celebrated it the morning you woke up

like you were peacefully holding your squirtle plushie and snuggling close to get more sleep bc it was still early

but natsu quite literally kicked your door down and your parents walked in with a large cake with candles

STEPBRO WHAT ARE YOU-

okay ill stop now

ofc you were startled bc what the hek 

like you were so surprised that you rolled off the bed and landed harshly on the floor

instead of being yanno ‘yey! its my borfday!’ you were like ‘dear asahi kill me’

waking you up at the buttcrack of dawn?

lmao 10/10 not recommend

natsu felt really bad and he pulled you up from the floor and situated you back on the bed while your parents backtracked back downstairs

‘ohmygosh babygirl im so sorry i didnt mean to hulk smash you to the floor’

im sorry sir what 💀

this whore

you waved him off but he still felt guilty so he just pressed kisses to your forehead to soothe it

meanwhile youre just leaning against him, eyes closed, bc you grew up with natsu always doing this whenever you got hurt so it was such a soff moment for you

eventually, he was able to bring you downstairs and your parents were lowkey scared lmao but you smiled at them

‘thank you for the cake’

they breathed a sigh of relief and you sat down on the chair to eat breakfast

‘here darling’

you accepted the bowl of rice from your madre and you ate your birthday breakfast with them while yall are saving the cake for later during dinner

when you finished, you were getting up and shouting up the stairs that you were showering first

hehe natsu was all like ‘lmao why? its like 4 in the morning’

you froze, foot hovering over a step and you sighed

‘excuse me what 💀‘

yea no

you were dragged back to the kitchen and you were all pouty bc duh who the hek wants to wake up that early but your parents saved themselves by giving you your parents early

(literally anything you guys want they gave you okay? but only like 3 lmao not a bajillion things)

you were still grateful for everything and you felt very much appreciated

since it was still early, you just decided to screw it and got ready to go to school early and set up the gym for early morning practice

natsu volunteered to go with you to school but you shook your head

‘nah, im okay. the walk is peaceful’

he huffed, crossing his arms, but nodded anyways

‘fine. only because its your birthday’

hehehehe the amount of freedom during your day of birth

you were of course the first one in the gym but you didnt mind bc you actually liked the quietness that was so rare inside there

you turned on some (f/m) (lmao favorite/music) and you were sweeping, unknowingly swaying and dancing slightly

at around 5:40, the third years have arrived and since theyre the eldest, they usually get there first

omg the blush explosion on their faces when they saw you twirling around with the mop and ofc oikawa being the little poopie head he is, he swooped in and held your waist

you got startled but seeing the soft brown eyes of your captain made a soft smile appear on your face

‘hello, oikawa-san’

you whispered and he nuzzled his face to the side of your head softly

‘morning, y/n-chan’

before he could go on, iwa threw him away behind him and you giggled

mattsun raised an eyebrow at your odd behavior

‘hm? why are you so happy today, y/n-chan?’

you stopped then chuckled

‘nothing much, mattsun-san’

you didnt really want to tell them it was your birthday bc tbh you didnt think it was a big deal or anything

the others werent complaining bc they rarely see you so lively and upbeat and they loved it

you were humming under your breath for gods sake

the other boys have trickled in and again, they also went ‘?’

your soft smiles, giggles, and joy was everything to them 

god bless for this beautiful morning

poor kindaichi cowered in fright as he braced himself for a scolding from you for missing a block but he got even more scared when you just patted his head

‘its okay, yuu-kun. there’s always a next time’

yea there was something wrong

unfortunately, school was starting and they weren’t able to start questioning you and there aint no way kindaichi and kunimi were going to do that themselves without the upperclassmen who could calm you down if you got too defensive

you were skipping down the hallway and you even looped your arms around your first year friends and they shared a confused look before being dragged by you

during class, darling kunimi was too busy and distracted by your quiet singing of some show that takeru watched when you were over

‘KUNIMI-SAN, IS MATH SO BORING THAT YOU FIND INTEREST ON L/N-SAN INSTEAD?’

yes, yes it is

but he didnt say that and instead turned away so fast that you felt the wind beside you

DID A 180 CRAZY~~~

he texted the separate bros group chat about you still being all happy and they were all curious as to what makes you so happy

during lunch time, kindaichi usually went over to go eat with you and kunimi right?

but he was surprised when he just saw kunimi there without you

‘wh-’

‘i dont know’

‘what do you mean you dont know?!’

nah fam we not dying yet

natsu texted you earlier that he had a bento for you that he made himself and he wanted you to eat it instead of the one your mom made

you were passing by the building entrance door thingy and caught the attention of the third years who were at the rooftop eating their lunch

there was also other students outside and they watched your flowery aura skip over to the equally attractive hiroshi natsu

‘y/n-chan~’

he cooed and you smiled up at him

curse him and his tall height

he let you hold the f/c cloth covered box so he could cup your face and kiss over your booboo again

‘wo mow, matsu-’

translation: no more, natsu!

you whined as he kept kissing your forehead and you were turning red at the attention from the other students

dang oikawa crushed his juice box at the sight even though he knew natsu was just a cousin

‘ill save you, y/n-chan!’

he shouted, already flying down the stairs towards you and the other third years after him to keep him from doing something stupid

but they also lowkey wanna see you too

but by the time they reached the entrance, you were already walking away and even passed by the quartet, giving them a close-eyed smile and a cute ‘hello!’

the 3 were distracted by you and were coddling you while oikawa ran out and shouted after natsu’s retreating form

‘natsu! oi, natsu!’

as if the boy was purposely ignoring him, natsu kept walking forward

‘HIROSHI NATSU!’

his scream finally made him turn around and natsu’s face held a teasing smirk

‘oya? chibi-chan?’

KDJFSLFDFKDSJKFD YES YOU CALLED?

oikawa huffed and panted as he firmly walked over to natsu

‘tell me, hiroshi natsu. why is y/n-chan all cutesy and happy today?’

then the smirk fell, replaced by an actual, genuine annoyed look

‘hah?’

oikawa blinked

‘what do you mean ‘hah’?’

natsu waved his hands around in a frenzy of shock

‘so you mean to tell me, you, oikawa tooru, the dude who literally woke up the neighborhood at the buttcrack of dawn a few weeks ago, in love with my cousin, doesn’t know what today is?’

‘was i supposed to,,,, know?’

KSDLFJSDKFJDS THIS DUDE

natsu’s face became a meme and the guy was so disappointed that he just turned around and continued walking

oikawa gasped and clutched natsu’s arm, begging and pleading to tell him

ofc the little shite natsu is, he smirked down at oikawa’s kneeling form

‘hmm, gotta say, chibi-kun. i like this view~’

KDSLFJSDKFJLSDKFJDKS WHOS CHILD ARE YOU, HIROSHI NATSU

‘tell me, natsu-chan!’

the puppy eyes of oikawa tooru not only affected girls but also boys fully socked homosexual boys so natsu had to turn away, fighting down a blush

stay loyal to katsuki

stay loyal to katsuki

stay loyal to katsuki

wait, no, probably tetsu

or kenma

or both

or keiji

‘-me! natsu-chan!’

that snapped the pink-haired boy out of his thoughts and crossed his arms, glaring down at oikawa

‘hm, why do you wanna know so bad? youre on your knees, begging me for information you shouldve already known since you claim to like her so much’

oikawa pouted and he sniffled

‘i wanna know everything about y/n-chan. i wanna know what today is so i can make her as happy as she is today forever!’

‘youre so cheesy’

natsu chided and oikawa pouted even harder causing natsu to sigh and pinch his nose

‘the girl was born today’

oikawa’s face lit up and he hurriedly stood on his feet, hands on natsu’s biceps since he could barely reach natsu’s shoulders bc of his 6′5 height

‘its her birthday today?!’

‘i literally just said that-’

‘oh my gosh! we need to plan something!’

oikawa started but then frowned

‘but we’re in school so it would be too late to do a surprise when we finish’

his mumbles 

filled their vicinity and natsu finally realized where exactly they were so he tugged the still mumbling boy over to the side out of people’s view

ohmygosh if i saw 2 handsome, tall, hot boys there, id be staring too omg

‘oi, oikawa’

he still didnt budge until natsu had to kick him at the leg

rip not his knee yall

tooru flinched and hatefully glared at the boy but natsu pointedly glared at him right back

‘before you start bitching to me, i was just gonna suggest i can help you and your little plan to woo my baby cousin’

as if he wasn’t irritated in the first place, tooru lit up and he excitedly clung onto natsu

‘really? you’ll really help me?’

natsu rolled his eyes and tried to pry the brunette off of him but he felt the grip tighten

‘listen, oikawa, as much as i like having pretty boys hang on to me, i’d really appreciate if you just back off a bit and actually understand what im saying’

can i just say how long their lunch break is?

and not at natsu trying to get with oikawa and oikawa completely missing it

‘you can go do your education scam system thing while i can go set things up over at that one noodle place she likes’

natsu explained

oikawa was about to smile until he paused and leaned away

‘theres a catch. i know theres a catch’

then natsu smirked, confirming oikawa’s suspicion

‘ill think about what i really want but for now, i just wanna see that one doggie boy you guys have. also, your friend with the big arms’

lmao imagine the surprise in oikawa’s face

‘YOU GO FOR THEM BUT NOT ME?!’

‘why? you want me to?’

‘YES! i mean, well-no but YES!’

‘*sigh*’

thats how oikawa ended up telling the boys about the last minute birthday surprise for you and the help from natsu

‘yea, apparently its her birthday. also, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, you need to talk to natsu-chan’

‘hah?! why?!’

‘THAT IDIOT?!’

you were minding your own business during class until you saw kunimi raise his hand

‘yes, kunimi-kun?’

‘bathroom’

normally, you wouldve just looked away but you noticed him grab his bag when the teacher wasn’t looking which prompted you to sigh since he was skipping class

i mean, whats the point of skipping class when the day is about to be over in like 15 minutes anyways?

‘make sure to come to practice’

you whispered when he passed and he smiled, making you raise an eyebrow bc that was a smile you knew that had a hidden meaning behind it

when the bell rang, everyone nyoomed themselves out of there and you were just walking past the door when a body came crashing to you which made you distracted and allowed a chance of vulnerability

there was a pair of hands covered your eyes from behind, hands grabbed your own from in front, and an arm around your waist started to guide you forward

‘um, just so you know, i have the power of god, anime, and iwa-san by my side and i wont hesitate to kick you in the di-’

‘its so cute when y/n-chan threatens us’

a voice from in front of you hums and you smiled

‘you wont think im really cute once youre on the floor clutching your di-’

‘oi, y/n, ill wash your tongue with soap’

‘yes, iwa-san’

you continued to walk, completely trusting at the hands of your boys, when you felt yourself being pulled to turn a corner

‘iwa-san? aren’t we going to the gym? why are we exiting the gates?’

the boys exchanged a look of amazement at your sense of intuition and the accuracy of your guess despite being deprived of your senses

‘dont think you can lie to us, y/n-chan! how could you not tell us its your birthday today?!’

you heard mattsun a few feet in front of you whine and you giggled

‘its not important’

then kyotani scoffed, you knowing it was him by feeling him twitch by the arm around your waist

‘boke, of course its important’

‘so your punishment for lying to us, we’re kidnapping you’

makki teased and you rolled your eyes beneath iwa’s hands

‘oh, shiver me timbers’

the walk continued, you still being dragged around, and you heard oikawa laugh

‘oh dear, its a sight to see, ain’t it? if only you can see the looks people are giving us, y/n-chan~ a group of boys taking a little girl like you? how could you trust us to not do something to you-ACK!’

you cut him off when you lifted your foot to kick right where it hurts the most

forget his weewee

its the knee

poor child crumbled to the floor and had to be picked up by baby watari

‘oh wata-cchi, youre the only one who cares about oikawa-san!’

you heavily sighed at the exagerrated theatrics of your captain

‘the one day. the one day when he could be a normal person for once’

you grumbled but stopped when you heard iwa laugh by your ear

‘he’s right you know. you technically lied to us when we asked if there was something special’

you shivered and you leaned your head back

‘its okay, iwa-san. we can talk about it after this event. make sure to give me my present, okay?’

SKDLFJSDKFJDSKFLDS GIRL NO I CANT I WANNA JUMP-

but iwa chuckled and he promised you that you would love his present

kyotani’s arm tightened around you, as if prompting you that he was still there and he wanted your attention too

‘careful there, pup’

he warned when you almost tripped over air

‘hehe, i know ill always be safe when youre next to me, kyo-san’

you teased and he was lucky your eyes were covered bc you would see the way his cheeks tinted red

‘s-shut up, idiot! maybe i shouldve just let you fall and hit your head! not like its gonna do damage since theres nothing there anyways!’

you just giggled and he retaliated by pinching your waist to which you squealed and gripped his hands

then the smell of the ramen broth entered your nose

‘are we-?’

‘nope! not there yet, y/n-chan!’

oikawa’s voice made you whine and complain but then he stopped, making everyone else stop too

‘okay, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, release her!’

both grumbled something about you being treated like a pokemon but stopped when your eyes widened and contorted into confusion

‘huh?’

oikawa grinned and your eyes met to see the way his eyes crinkled, a tell-tale sign that this one was a rare genuine smile

‘come on! lets go!’

you let him take you inside the restaurant until your feet stopped, eyes wide when you noticed the streamers and the cake by the corner

your parents stood with natsu by the table and a large smile decorated your face

‘you,, you did this for me?’

you whispered and the team made noises of agreement

‘we had to do something for you to celebrate the day you were born. its a special day because you came into the world and we were able to meet you’

yahaba grinned and you gave him a big hug but you leaned back a bit so that the others would know you’re talking to them too

‘everyone, thank you. i love you’

they all scoffed a bit to hide their flustered state but they still smiled and each gave you a hug

‘oi! come here and eat the food! oikawa’s paying today!’

natsu shouted, which caught the attention of some customers in the restaurant, but they just ignored it bc theyve seen you and the team so many times that yall practically lived there

‘what?! i didnt-’

oikawa started but your mother came up to him and clasped her hands to his, sharing the same exact grin you have

‘you must be oikawa tooru. y/n has told me loads about you’

excuse him while he descends to heaven bc your mother is practically another you

iwa was already acquainted with your dad so they started talking and you just stood back, observing your two families interact with each other

you were so unbelievably happy that it hurts

kindaichi noticed you and he slinked away from the debate between makki and mattsun to go sling an arm around you

‘so? what do you think?’

you turned to him with glassy eyes

‘im so blessed. so blessed to have these amazing people with me’

poor babie panicked a bit bc he didnt really know how to comfort a crying girl but he just wrapped his arms around you

‘hehe, its kinda the other way around actually. we’re blessed to have someone like you’

he whispered and you giggled then playfully hit his shoulder

‘so cheesy, yuu-kun’

he leaned away from the hug and gave you an offended look

‘but its true! i dont know what we did to have-’

‘Y/N-CHAN! NO! HELP!’

oikawa shouted from the other side, cutting off your soft moment with kindaichi

‘what are you doing, natsu?’

you noticed your cousin wrapping his arms around your captain and trying to drag him away but poor tooru was scrambling to escape

‘we made a deal, didnt we, darling~? i know what i want now and youre going to have to give me you’

oikawa screamed

a/n: can we please pretend i posted this on november 3? bc i was dumb and forgot to post this and KLDJLSDKFJDSKD IM SO ANGRY but its okay at least i am able to publish this haha

[magebae]

Like Mother, Like Daughter

Rhea and her experiences with two different births. Slight Rhea/Catherine and F!Byleth/Lorenz (dont judge me im soft for their paired ending.

Spoilers for the Golden Deer route and Byleth’s Backstory

When she was born, she had no heartbeat. She was dead, but living. The mother wasn’t as “lucky,” and perished in the night, only having minutes with her unfortunate child. And yet, those minutes were all she needed if she had to go then and there. 

Rhea would never forget that night. That she stood there and watched the woman she herself helped to create, helped to doom, die. Watched as she begged Rhea to save the baby, who was faring no better than the mother. And Rhea did it, not only out of respect for the woman she had once hoped would be the next progenitor god, but out of a greedful wish that maybe the baby would bring back her mother. 

The mother’s name was Ariel. When she was born, Rhea tried everything she could to make sure that her plans would not fail this time. So many attempts, and yet Ariel proved to be another failure. Looking back, Rhea regretted the ways she took it out on the woman. She had been jaded by then, guilting Ariel to the point where the two had grown distant. Still, Rhea had let Ariel stay at the monastery as a nun. In a way, Ariel was thankful that she hadn’t been completely abandoned, but her heart was hurt from those years of shame and hate. 

For most of her life, she was reclusive and distrusted others as a result. It wasn’t until she met Jeralt that she became more open to the world. She had truly began to love the world and appreciate all it had to give. Rhea could feel Ariel’s growing need to leave the monastery, and hadn’t cared. Jeralt and Ariel hadn’t been careful, and a child was conceived between the two of them. And yet, Ariel was still happy to have a child of her own. That was when Ariel had approached Rhea about leaving, but this new child could be the success Rhea was looking for. So, Rhea convinced the couple to stay at the monastery till the child was born. Part of her knew it was wrong, but by that point she had become so desperate that she was willing to do anything.

The pregnancy was rough. Rhea could see how drained Ariel became over time. She had very little energy toward the end, and looked sick. Not many thought she would survive the birth, and yet she and Jeralt still talked about their plans for the future. While Rhea felt sorry for the woman, she was more focused on the child’s potential. As the day of birth came closer, Rhea found herself becoming more hopeful that this time things would work out. That her mother would come back and end her despair. Even if it meant ripping the child away from it’s own mother, Rhea went forward with her plan. 

When the birth actually began, Ariel appeared panicked. Rhea had told Jeralt to stay outside, and though he was very discontent with it, he still complied. Ariel spent her last hours in pain, suffering so that she could finally meet the baby she already loved. The baby she sang to whenever she could, who she promised to give the world to. Even till the end she believed she’d be able to live a full life with her child. But Rhea knew that would never be the case. And it wasn’t until Ariel held her child in her arms, her silent, almost dead child, that she realized that she too was nearing her end. And in those last minutes, Ariel asked Rhea to do something Rhea thought the woman would oppose. 

“Save this child’s life no matter what.”

Ariel didn’t specify what she meant, but Rhea knew. Despite her hopefulness, Ariel wasn’t naive. She was giving Rhea permission to put Sothis’ heart in the baby. Even if it meant she would die. Rhea didn’t know how to respond. All this time, she had been so guilty, so uncaring for Ariel. And here Ariel was, making such a selfless decision. It put Rhea to shame, even made her feel hatred toward herself for how she had become during Ariel’s pregnancy. 

“... The baby is a girl...I’ll have to do it soon… I’m sorry it has to be this way.” 

The other didn’t respond. Ariel had feared death, had cried and cried to Jeralt behind closed doors about the possibility, but at that moment, all she could feel was peace. A darker side of her deep down was happy to have been done with this miserable life, even if she had found happiness with Jeralt. Even if she had lived, she knew the shadow of Sothis would always be cast on her, that she could never run away from Rhea. So with the few minutes she had left, she hugged her baby. She sang a song a nun had taught her, and cradled the almost dead baby to her chest. Despite trying not to, she imagined a better future, one where the three could be a family, far away from crests and gods. Ariel cried for her lost future, shedding tears the infant may never be able to. 

“Byleth. I want to name her Byleth.… My darling Byleth, I’m sorry I won’t be with you much longer. I only hope… you can one day smile, and be free. You and Jeralt… smile, be happy.”

Rhea had to intervene. Despite the scene in front of her, Rhea’s selfishness took over. It was time.

“... Mother...it's time for us to be together again.”

30 years later

The deja vu that hit Rhea was unpleasant to remember. Many years had passed and the woman was still forced to face her guilt everyday of her life. But the past few months had been exceedingly rough for the aged woman. 

After the last battle with Nemesis, she had retired to the Red Canyon with Catherine. They had started a new, simpler life together, Rhea in contemplation and self punishment, and Catherine in devotion. Rhea was not sure what to make of their relationship which had certainly become romantic, but was still awkward. The two had been content to live their lives away from society, Rhea being there for Catherine as the mortal aged. But still, Rhea found herself unable to truly find peace, knowing what she had become. 

It was five years after the battle with Nemesis that Byleth visited the two at the Red Canyon. The child- no, woman- had become a proud, skilled leader of the people. Ruling over the new dawn of Fodlan, she brought about more equality and prosperity with the help of her allies. Though she held the title of Queen, it was thanks to her past students that she was able to mend some of the scars of war. With those years, she had become hardened in appearance. She no longer cared for the length of her hair, letting it grow out. A crown lay upon her head, similar in style to Sothis’ yet different enough to separate herself from the god. While she usually wore clothing more fitting of her new status, she had dressed simple for the long trip to the Red Canyon.

“We need to talk,” is all Byleth said at first, no kind of hello or warmness to the former archbishop. 

“... Of course,” was all Rhea could respond with. 

“My husband and I want to have a baby… But I’m afraid I might run into some complications,”

“... I see.” It was rare to see Byleth’s neutral face crack, but now, she showed her genuine concern. Rhea felt uncomfortable being face to face with the other again. She was drowned in guilt once more, not just from seeing Byleth, but from her talks of pregnancy. It was like she was being brought back to that moment 30 years ago. Along with that, she had not ending things on the best of terms with Byleth five years ago. She understood why, Byleth’s anger at what she’d done was justifiable. When the fighting had finished, Byleth had been able to take in all that Rhea had said, and had responded in rage. She could finally let out her aggressions on Rhea, letting her know how badly she had hurt Byleth’s father with what she did. She hadn’t even been at the wedding between Byleth and… and Lorenz.

Rhea hadn’t expected it either. She had honestly thought Byleth would end up with Claude considering how close the two were. Even Seteth had agreed with her years ago when they talked about Byleth and the lord. And yet, after the war she announced plans to be with Lorenz. It was just another thing that made Rhea realize that she truly didn’t know Byleth. The couple had walked out of the Goddess Tower, hand in hand, looking overjoyed one day after the war had ended. From what Rhea heard, their love only grew stronger over the years, the Lord of Roses helping his wife to fairly rule over the people and help bring about a reformation in the land. 

“I will admit, I do not know what would happen for sure. You are the first of your kind. However, I can still help you during your pregnancy. I am afraid my notes from back then were destroyed, but… I can still remember some of what I learned, and I can use it to help you.” 

Byleth only nodded.

Two Years Later

When he was born, he had a heart beat. A healthy baby boy. Byleth laid on the bed, crying tears of joy as she looked upon her son. 

Byleth’s pregnancy had been very different from Ariel’s. The woman faced some complications, but hadn’t grown sick and weak. Rhea had arrived with Catherine to the queen’s home around seven months ago to help the Queen. Her husband had urged Byleth to rest, but the Queen still tried to be involved in government affairs. While Lorenz had taken on a lot of her work, Byleth found herself talking more with Rhea and the older woman helped her. They would never be friends, but the two reached an understanding of each other. And unlike with Ariel, Rhea had not been invasive with her aid. Both had worked together and learned how to increase the chances of mother and child surviving. 

And so, when Byleth went into labor, Rhea was genuinely helping Byleth not for her own selfish reasons, but because she wanted to do it right this time. She knew nothing could make up for the past, but at least she could be a different person now. It helped her see the beauty she had ignored back then. The birth itself was hard on Byleth. Her screams echoed throughout the building. Rhea knew Lorenz wanted to be in the room, but Rhea knew it was too risky. Thus, Byleth gripped anything she could, creating rips in the blankets and pillows. Byleth pushed and cried until finally, a new cry broke out into the room. It was almost shocking to Rhea. It was beautiful. 

Rhea cleaned the baby, taking in all of his features. There was a dusting of purple hair on the infant’s head. She could see that the boy would look more like his father just from the features he possessed. Despite this, she was also aware of the baby’s slightly pointed ears. Clearly, the child’s blood had been affected by the heart of Sothis. It would make things harder for the boy, but Rhea knew the family would overcome it. She couldn’t help but smile at the child as she finished up and brought him back to his mother. 

“It’s a boy. He’s such a beautiful child.”

Rhea watched Byleth smile and reach for her baby. While Byleth may never be able to express the full extent of human emotion, she had become more expressive over the years. She could smile and be happy. This feeling of relief has rarely ever overcome Rhea like this. 

“Let everyone in,” Byleth managed to get out between deep breaths.

“Of course… Have you picked a name yet?” Rhea asked.

“Jeralt.”

Rhea smiled and walked to the door. 

[susantregre]

You’re Having ANOTHER Baby?

We recently announced to family, friends and co-workers that we are expecting our fourth child.

However, not everyone shared in our joy.

“Don’t you two have anything else to do?”

“Wait, how many kids do you have at home already?”

“Can you guys even afford another?”

“This couldn’t have been planned, right?”

“Wow, a fourth. Did you even want another kid?”

Still, whatever the reasoning, the criticism didn’t catch us completely off-guard. In fact, it was something we had grown accustomed to over the years with each new addition to our family.

The day we announced our first pregnancy, people were shocked. We were too young. We couldn’t afford a baby. We were foolish and should have waited.

We seemed to get a pass on our second child under the guise of it “made sense” to give our daughter a sibling to play with.

We would not be so lucky with our third pregnancy. It seemed that people in my life just couldn’t wrap their heads around the idea of three children, two parents, all co-existing in the same home. Is it really that mind-boggling to society?

As long as we were done, then maybe we could reclaim some normalcy to our family and be responsible, stop having children and try to deal with the chaos we already had on our hands.

But, that was not in our plans.

The day after I delivered our third, I was scheduled for a tubal. My husband and I had this responsible plan laid out for months prior to my delivery. But when that day came, I burst into tears and refused to consent to the surgery. The thought that I had even agreed to this plan in the first place made me ill. My husband tried to calm me and reassured me that it was all of the hormones talking and to trust what we had decided months ago. That day, as I held my third baby in my arms, I knew right then and there that there would be a fourth. It’s incredible what our maternal instincts can speak to us if we pay close attention.

And here we are, a year and a half later, a third of the way into our fourth pregnancy. And with that brings the list of questions that are asked by everyone, including ourselves at times.

How could someone possibly want to add a sixth member to their family? A fourth baby in six years; have we gone mad? Our house is already beyond chaotic, our bank account runs extremely low and too close for comfort by the end of each month, and there are days we search for our sanity, and as hard as we search, it can’t be found — anywhere.

  Another couple years of giving my body over. Nine months of carrying this child to term, endless days and nights of discomfort. Another pregnancy of severe sickness, constant fatigue and more migraines than I can count. Once again my hormones will leave me feeling as if I’m ready to jump out of my own skin at times, let alone the up and down roller coaster my poor family has to deal with. And after this newest member of the family enters the world, I will no longer be a home for him or her, but I will be their only source of nutrients to keep them alive.

I have found myself nervous, revisiting the nights I have found myself hallucinating from not getting enough sleep for not only days, weeks or months, but rather years.

I wonder how I’ll survive as some days, I have found myself completely frustrated over numerous things that are completely out of my control, but must just be endured and pushed through. Will this new addition decrease that?

We had a clear vision of light at the end of the tunnel that has now disappeared. Now we are in for a few more years of buying and changing diapers. We’ll have another toddler to eventually potty train. More sleepless nights and long days of consoling this little unknowing angel of the torments of teething.

Patience and time. Two things that seem to drastically decrease in each of my days. My husband and three other children yearn for so much more of me; how could I find room for one more? I remember falling in love so heavily with each child, I was certain with each subsequent pregnancy I would not be able to find enough love to give to another.

There are days I find myself amazed as I handle certain situations with an evolving grace and patience. And then, more often, there are other days I find myself a mad woman, running about at 65 mph. No one is listening to me, whatever I have tried to accomplish just needs to be completed again and I feel as if I’m about to break.

I go through each pregnancy trying to hold tight to my faith. I try to chase away anxiety and fear with patience and prayer and tell myself time and time again that all of my complaining and worrying will do nothing but make matters worse. I read about tragic stories of complications during pregnancies, child birth and the hardships that all too many babies come into this world facing.

There are already times in this pregnancy when I feel run down, sick and overcome with the most intense rush of hormones. I try to make it through some of my days with white knuckles as I hold on for dear life. As tears come down, I ask myself:How in the world will I handle four? So… why another baby?

  Considering all of this, it’s still quite simple for me. I couldn’t imagine having it any other way. I get to experience, for a fourth time, what some women don’t get to experience nearly enough, or rather, never at all.

When I think of bringing another baby into the world, I’m completely overcome with awe that once again, I get to go through one of the most remarkable experiences that one could undergo on this earth: giving birth to a child. It’s the most intense and painful, yet exhilarating, phenomenon one could ever endure.

I get to find consolation in my children when not one other single person in the world understands me. You never know true peace and the best kind of heartache until your toddler wipes away one of your tears, rubs your head and looks deep into your eyes with the most warm, sympathetic, genuine gaze that any human being is capable of giving.

I get to refuel myself in the most incredible way possible after hours of pacing an inconsolable baby. When your baby finally falls fast asleep, laid perfectly against your chest as your hearts are now as one, their most perfect, tiny breath whispers in your ear. Right then and there, you wish you could hold onto this moment for longer than forever. You find yourself so still, not only for fear of waking this angel, but for fear of losing this moment.

Given the choice, would I choose another baby over a larger bank account? I’d pick a baby any day. Would I prefer to call myself rich in regards to growing numbers in my savings, or in terms of my precious, growing family? The latter has been the easiest decision of my life.

There are times where I get a short break to myself or when the kids are finally tucked in bed for the night when the silence can be almost deafening. I certainly appreciate peaceful, sleeping babies, yet I know there will come a time years down the road where our children no longer want to talk to us or be around us, and to be able to prolong that timeline puts me at such a great ease.

God willing, one day, our children will bless us with grandchildren. This leaves me feeling completely fulfilled with the utmost satisfaction. Big family, big holidays, ‘big’ love… it truly may be one of the best gifts you could receive in this lifetime.

Family, no matter what the size, is the most important thing you will ever have in this world. If only society could see babies just as they are: blessings. Oh, the battles and hardships and stressors that lay ahead for me, this I will not deny. But the abundant blessings that these miracles already have and will continue to bring to my life is truly immeasurable.

So here we are, another baby. Another body to clothe. Another tummy to feed. Another 18 years of growing expenses which then turn into car payments, college costs and weddings.

And let me tell you, I could not be happier.

The Real Deal of Parenting

The post You’re Having ANOTHER Baby? appeared first on Kids Activities Blog.

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This Short Film Aims to 'Rehumanize' Immigrants

New Post has been published on https://www.petlovers.shovelnews.com/this-short-film-aims-to-rehumanize-immigrants/

This Short Film Aims to 'Rehumanize' Immigrants

Caracol Cruzando tells of the journey of 7-year old Anais “Caracol” Cruzando, who leaves her homeland of Costa Rica to immigrate with her undocumented parents to the U.S. En route, she is separated from her family and her best friend, a tiny pet turtle named Tiku. In just 15 minutes, the short film lands a powerful punch about the pain, trauma, resilience and unlikely beauty within this migration experience. 

Writer and director Pamela Chavez shares the heartache, and imagination that went into this touching film. 

The Advocate: What drew you to tell this story? Is any of it based on your life? Chavez: Yes, it’s loosely based on some experiences I had immigrating from Costa Rica to the U.S. I was born in the U.S., but my family was not — they were undocumented. We all lived with the fears of deportation looming over us, a fear many undocumented families feel. My parents decided to move back down to Costa Rica when I was 5, so we caravaned down. Things didn’t work out for them, so we moved back up when I was 8. The airport scenes in the U.S. were true to my memories as a child — it’s similar to what I experienced. When I lived in Costa Rica, I was having a hard time adjusting, and my parents got me a dog and she quickly became my best friend. When we left, we had to leave her behind, along with most of our extended family. As an 8-year-old, I was crushed. I was devastated to leave my dog, to move again, leave my grandparents, cousins, aunties, and uncles. It was a rough transition. I wanted to take those memories and do something with them. I wanted to approach the story through that lens. The memories were very vivid, and I felt that I could use them to propel a sort of healing process for me, to help let go of those memories in a way that felt transformative. I wanted to take control of my narrative, I wanted to express something genuine, heartfelt, and relevant. I didn’t want to just focus on the feelings of despair, I wanted to rehumanize our experiences and offer a counternarrative to the ways im/migrants are portrayed in the media.

The connection between her family and her pet turtle is really touching. How did you conceptualize the dream sequences that show their bond? That scene took several iterations to write — I had some wild alternative sequences! Luckily, I had a talented story editor, Aurora Guerrero, helping me shape the story. We went through several versions, and she gave me honest, helpful feedback. At the end of the day, I wanted to make sure there was a thread between a few important themes- water, nature, and loss. These themes carry throughout the film and serve as a part of Anais’s identity. It’s where she grounds herself. In the whale scene, we see her courage tested. We see that ground shake, and it won’t be the first time. The whale, who she fears, stands between her and Tiku in the sky. Tiku is not afraid and continues to be playful. Anais knows she has to be courageous to meet him in the sky. She confronts this fear, and their final moment of happiness gives us a bit of closure. We don’t know she’s about to lose Tiku, but because she faced her fear and didn’t let doubt linger, she was able to at least have a final moment with him. Loss is like this — we don’t know when it’s coming, but living with courage gives us some peace. Their bond is important, and what she does with it when it breaks is equally important for the story.   How does being a queer woman of color influence your directing and the stories you tell? I learned to be a storyteller by learning from other QWOC filmmakers who create, advocate, and battle in this field. Our narratives are sidelined, so I approach directing and writing with this is in mind. I think about the film from differing perspectives. I make choices about who this might be for or who might disagree with it. The decisions are conscious and thought out — being a QWOC, you have to be aware of how you are going to be perceived. As a director, you make a choice about those perceptions. Every director has their own voice and consciousness around this. Because I follow in the footsteps of politically aware and active directors, my lens is one that centers justice, injustice, equity, identity and transformation. These are all pillars of the QWOC feminist movement. My voice, creatively, is where I add to this conversation. As an animator, as a visual artist, and as a storyteller that wants to mix both the genuine and the imaginative. I also prioritized a team of artists that were queer, people of color, or from marginalized communities. I did my research. I connected with my network — I reached out, and those people reached out to others. People believed in the story and signed up. The talent exists; prioritizing these voices was really important to me. I was given an opportunity through Latino Public Broadcasting  to create this story, and it was important for me to do the same.

Your bio says you want to “highlight the resilience and beauty that rise from these uniquely important experiences.” Why do you want to focus on the beauty that comes from these stressful and potentially traumatic immigrant situations? I want to focus on beautiful, real, and difficult experiences because they exist! This is my reality, it’s what I can tell from a genuine place. It would be odd for me to tell another story. I have experienced trauma and hardship, but there’s also the before, and there’s the after! The moments themselves have passed — for some, they repeat or continue longer than others — what we are left with is the life we live in between. By focusing on the lessons, it may help change future situations.  For example, in this film, Anais loses Tiku. Does it affect who she is? We don’t know for certain, but we have an idea. We see she comes from an identity that relies on nature, on her connection to the earth, on a dream world that brings her joy, on ancient, ancestral creatures that guide her, and all the worlds that exist in between. Her parents have instilled a sense of love and hope. Her father shares with her the story of her birth, of her strength. These are all elements that will help Anais grow from her loss. She’s got some tools! They will help root her, and we see that when she’s facing the moon in the hotel. Even after she loses Tiku and worries about her mother, she still hopes. That to me is beautiful. That’s powerful. It’s the rose that grows from the concrete, to quote Tupac Shakur. It’s character and resilience at play. It’s something our communities are very familiar with. Do we know what happens? No. But we have an idea.

How do you hope your film will impact viewers in the midst of our border crisis? The message being sent by the government during this crisis is that immigrants are subhuman. They’re using children as political pawns, and people see that it’s wrong! These are issues im/migrants have been dealing with for many years; it’s not new, but the purposeful separations are newer. The state’s rhetoric of clear, blatant criminalizing has people taking to the streets, fighting back. This film is not the answer, but it’s my answer. This is my form of activism, and I hope that it serves a rehumanizing purpose. Anais’s relationship to nature serves as a part of her identity as a Costa Rican. No matter where she goes she will always have a connection to that part of herself. It’s comforting — her identity serves a purpose beyond aesthetics. It’s humanizing, and will hopefully build empathy. I hope that families who are immigrating or who have immigrated, if they watch this, can find some semblance of hope. The journey across borders is hard, and we just want to forget. It’s important to remember where we came from, but most importantly the will it took to get here and how we can continue using it to propel us forward.     What happens to Tiku the turtle? This story is told through the perspective of a child. Just like Anais, we don’t know for sure where Tiku goes. Her dad is equally unaware,, and we will never know. If I was them, I would just be happy I didn’t get caught; that’s a lot of attention, and attention garners even more review from customs.  So, as an audience member, what do you do with that that feeling? Does it sink you? Does it frustrate you? Do you tap into parts of yourself that are resilient, after the anger? How do children feel about not knowing? Can this help create empathy? Where does your resilience come from? I had only a short amount of time in the film to build Anais’s resilience, but for her it comes from her relationship with nature. That’s why it’s important for to remember what Ceiba said — “Never lose yourself, or forget, we [nature] are everywhere.”

Caracol Cruzando is part of the PBS online film festival. Watch and vote for your favorite film here.

Learn more about Pamela Chavez here.

Source: https://www.advocate.com/arts-entertainment/2018/7/16/short-film-aims-rehumanize-immigrants