#yeah omfg literally she is in the horror genre

[godfrey-the-chaos-duck]

AIGHT

i was offline for a long ass time cause i was with my gf, we watched the new helluva boss episode and it absolutely fucking RULED (rant under cut)

also i think my shitty luck caught up to me bc i clearly fell apart after this busy week and am currently sick (nothing serious, just a cold but I will be trying to rest anyways)

gonna rewatch the 87 cent solution at some point bc *relate*

but yeah i'll be fine anyway GHOSTFUCKERS RANT

so first of all listen. I'm not a hater often but there's two things I think I will always be salty af about.

"The Full Moon" not being released on the actual full moon in May.

"Ghostfuckers" not having anything resembling 80s synth music. Like obvs they couldn't do an outright parody of the Ghostbusters theme song bc of shitty copyright but I would have thought they'd do SOMETHING 80s-ish. Now, this is purely my love of cheesy 80s movies talking so I'll shut up. FOR THE LOVE OF GAWD, DON'T @ ME.

Now for the non-hater part of the rant

Blitz not coping at fucking ALLLLLL with his breakup (oh no wait you need a relationship for one of those)

Moxxie losing his damn mind over accounting was so fun to see, omfg LET HIM LOSE IT MORE OFTEN

MILLIE'S LORE AND HOW SHE WAS SO INSPIRED BY BLITZ. I'M. I CANNOT BE NORMAL ABOUT THAT cause like. it's literally how I feel whenever I see other queer and neurodivergent people making their way in the world. If they can do it, so can I, and that gives me something to hope for

The horror vibes. Once again, I'm biased as all hell because I find horror as a genre (and the tropes therein) super fascinating. But like. the animation of the fight scenes? TOP TIER. The concept of the infestor demon thing (Rolando? I think that was his name?) being smth thst can possess people and fuck with their memories and make their minds a living hell? Honestly this is my gravity falls hyperfixation talking (yeah that one ain't going away anytime soon, good fucking luck) but he reminded me SO MUCH of bill cipher. Like I seriously want to write Bill doing a "low-light reel" of Ford's or Stan's life with the unfortunate twin in question just sitting there not able to do shit about it. and fuck i'm rambling IGNORE THIS OMFG I always do this agh

And the SONGS. Especially the fact that "I Wanna Fuck A Ghost" (the credits song) was sung by Erika Lenningsen, aka CHARLIE'S VA. 100/10 no notes, the team cooked here

also FUCK YES to Blitz getting character growth

[mountainsluna]

wicked regrets

request: “a seonghwa scenario in which he’s a “serious” looking boyfriend who doesn’t really celebrate Halloween but the reader does, so he gets jealous of her friends cuz she’s spending too much time with them decorating and shopping for costumes”

pairing: seonghwa x reader (gender neutral besides reader in a female character costume)

genre: angst + fluff ending

word count: 2.1k

✩ [author’s note] for those of you that aren’t familiar with the movie the nightmare before christmas, theseeeee are the characters/costumes i refer to in the story! :)

✩ masterlist

✩ requests : check bio or masterlist ♡

One afternoon in late September, you and your boyfriend were out shopping when you passed by a new Halloween store that immediately caught your attention. “Oh my god! Baby we have to go in, can we just look around inside really quick please?” 

“Hmm okay love, but just really quick.” The lack of excitement in Seonghwa’s voice didn’t register with you as you were already halfway in the door before he he could finish replying. You were nearly bouncing off the walls that were filled with scary costumes and spooky decorations. You two had started dating last November so it was your first Halloween with Seonghwa as your boyfriend and he could honestly say he had never seen you this ecstatic.

"Baby look!!! They have the cutest decorations look at these pumpkins and these candles!! Oooh we can get these small skeletons for the living room! What do you think?" 

"Uhm I guess if you want. I don’t really celebrate it...well not since I was like 9. Isn’t it really just for kids anyways?” His words made your smile falter a bit. Halloween was your absolute favorite time of the year, and there were already so many activities planned out in your head that you wanted to do with your boyfriend. However, from the looks of it, it didn’t seem like he’d be interested in the slightest.

“No of course not...Are you telling me you don’t think Halloween is fun as an adult?” 

He shrugged his shoulders as his fingers grazed a large plastic butcher knife in front of him.

“No horror movies?”

“No.”

“Pumpkin carving?”

“Too messy.”

“Decorating?”

“Waste of money, we live in an apartment and if we decorate inside no one will even see it.”

You hated to admit how disappointed you were at his answers. You knew from the start that Seonghwa was a very serious person and you rarely ever had an issue with it. However, you were a couple and wanting to do couple things for your favorite holiday would’ve meant a lot to you.

“So, you wouldn’t even go with me to a haunted house?”

“I don’t see the appeal in literally paying someone to scare me. Aren’t your friends into all that stuff too? I say you should go with them.”

The fact that he wouldn’t even entertain the thought of having a little fun with you made you sad enough but for him to just pawn you off to your friends so he didn’t have to participate made you feel even more disappointed.

“Alright then Hwa, I guess I will.” You said sighing to yourself as you walked away from him.

----------

You decided that no matter how Seonghwa felt, you weren’t going to let his lack of excitement ruin your October. You even made sure he was aware of that the day you visited the Halloween store, leaving with nearly four bags full of decorations that he helped you carry home.

When October 1st arrived, your mind had already begun to wonder about what costume you wanted to get this year. Not wanting to hear Seonghwa shoot down your couple costume ideas you decided to not even mention it to him to save yourself the disappointment. Luckily, most of your friends were eager for the holiday just like you, one afternoon as you all hung out at a coffee shop, you vented to them about your problem with Seonghwa. You added in that you were a bit sad you couldn’t live out your couple costume dream with him by going as Jack and Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas, a movie even Seonghwa knew was your favorite.

“Well I don’t have a costume picked out yet and I know that movie, I wouldn’t mind dressing up with you if you want?” Your eyes lit up at your friend Hongjoong’s suggestion. He wasn’t as tall as your boyfriend to be able to fit the costume as good but he was taller than you and that was enough.

A few days later, Seonghwa had just gotten home, walking in as you were grabbing your keys. “Oh? Are you leaving?” He asked, you never left the house that late on a Tuesday night. 

“Oh, yeah I forgot to tell you my friends and I are going costume shopping. Don’t worry I won’t be out long and your food is on the stove.” You placed a quick kiss on his cheek before walking out the door. He stood there a bit shocked by your exit, but brushed it off. It’s not like it was an everyday thing.

It wasn’t until the week before Halloween that Seonghwa had begun to get frustrated. You had spent nearly every weekend either inviting your friends over or going to their apartments for Halloween baking or scary movies while he kept to himself. The first few times you told him it would be nice if he tagged along but he refused and after the third rejection you stopped asking. But now, he felt left out. Seonghwa swore to himself if you asked him again, he would accept this time, he just missed spending time with you. But you never asked.

The day before Halloween, Seonghwa was scrolling through his feed when he saw an ad for a haunted house that was only open that night and Halloween and he remembered you asking him if he’d go to one, regretting his words, he decided he should be the one to ask you this time.

He walked into the bedroom where you were adjusting your red wig onto your head. “Hey baby”, he started, sitting on the edge of the bed as he watched you at your vanity. “I know you probably have plans with your friends but...I would like to take you somewhere tomorrow night...to make up for everything I’ve missed this past month.” You saw his reflection in the mirror in front of you and you could tell how bad he was feeling, he never looked that sad.

“Where did you want to go?” You asked, turning to look at him directly.

He began telling you about the haunted house he had found but when he noticed your expression change from curiosity to a pout he stopped, knowing you had something to say.

“I...I’m sorry baby but...my friends and I are actually going there tonight. That’s why I’m all dressed up.” You said, spreading your arms to display your Sally costume to him.

At that moment, Seonghwa felt even more embarrassed of himself realizing he never even bothered to ask you what costume you had chosen and what your plans were for that night. He sat there staring at you for a few minutes, not knowing what to say to you. Before he could find the words, there was a knock on your door. You stood up, looking down at your boyfriend as his head hung slightly. “Maybe, we can try again next year?” You said, placing a kiss on his head before walking to the door to let your friends in.

When Seonghwa finally joined he looked over all your friends in their costumes, the laughter that filled the room made him feel jealous that he wasn’t apart of it. He felt his heart nearly drop as his eyes landed on your friend dressed as your cinematic lover. Even with the round mask covering his face, he knew it was Hongjoong. He always trusted him as your friend and he knew you had every right to dress up with any of your friends that you wanted but never did he expect to see this. As you all begun to head out you noticed as your boyfriend silently retreated back to the bedroom without telling you goodbye.

“Baby...Are you okay?” You asked, slowly stepping into the room to see him sitting in his previous position. He could barely even look you in the eyes.

“I’m sorry I didn’t try harder, I knew how much all this meant to you and it’s my fault for not wanting to be apart of it. But...seeing you and Hongjoong made me realize how much I really missed out on.” You caressed his cheek as he spoke, you knew he meant his apology but you weren’t sure how to comfort him. You didn’t want to leave him home all alone to feel bad while you went out with your friends. But then you had an idea, your body shot up as Seonghwa looked at you in surprise. 

“I think I may have an idea...wait here!” you said and before he could question you, you were gone. He could hear muffled exchanges as you and Hongjoong talked in the living room, right as he stood up to go check on you, you opened the door to reveal yourself and Hongjoong’s costume mask and jacket in your hands. “Try these on!” You said, extending the items to him.

“Is...is Hongjoong okay with this?” He asked, hesitating as he lifted up the jacket, inspecting it slightly. 

“Mhhm.” You said, smiling back at him as you two heard Hongjoong’s voice coming down the hallway.

“Oh I’m fine with that.” He chimed. “It’s this I’m not too sure about.” He said, holding out his black and white striped costume pants to Seonghwa as he stood there in his white shirt and gray boxers.

“T...they may be too...short for me.” Seonghwa said, earning a small glare from your friend.

“I’m sure you can squeeze into them, my love. Now change quickly while I help Hongjoong with his new costume.” You said, pushing the smaller boy out as you closed the door behind you.

After fumbling with the other boy’s pants for a few minutes, (omfg that sentence did not come out right hjsjshdkhs) Seonghwa joined you two in the bathroom biting back a laugh as he looked over Hongjoong.

A large white bed sheet and a pair of Seonghwa’s white pants now adorned his body along with a thick velvet pink choker you had worn a few times that matched a dress you owned, and to top it all off, two small bathroom towels tied to his hair with your hair bands.

All Hongjoong could do was glare at the taller male, as he stood letting you adjust the costume around him. “I let you dress me as the dog to help your relationship, I just want you both to know that you owe me your lives.” You smiled as you placed the red clown nose that you had draw a jack-o-lantern face on, on his nose.

“Zero is the best character in the entire movie, it’s not that bad.” You laughed, clapping your hands together. “Anyways, now we can go!”

--------

As you three exited your car to meet up with your friends, you looked over the two boys standing in front of you, Seonghwa’s pants looking more like high waters and Hongjoong’s cuffed nearly three times over to reach his ankle. “Can I ask you guys something?” You smirked as they looked back at you expectantly.

“How does it feel to be wearing each other’s pants?” You laughed, tears nearly ruining your face paint as you dodged Hongjoong’s bedsheet clad arms that were swatting at you playfully.

Once you found your friends you all got in line together, you rested your head on Seonghwa’s arm as you waited, the feeling of having your boyfriend next to you tonight made you feel so happy and the feeling of you in Seonghwa’s arms made him even happier. The entire haunted house was exactly what you had expected. You nearly threw yourself into Seonghwa’s chest every time a zombie got too close to you. Your boyfriend on the other hand practically laughed throughout the entire thing, finding the setups and actors to be quite amusing.

As you walked back to your vehicles Hongjoong told you he was going to ride with your other friends to another haunted house if you two wanted to join but you declined, Seonghwa looking at you confused as you waved bye to your friends getting into your car instead.

“Love, why did you say no?” He asked, hoping he hadn’t ruined your night.

“Because, I want to spend tonight and Halloween night with my boyfriend... If he wants to...” You said your eyes moving to look at him slowly.

“O..Oh, of course I do! But, I don’t want you to miss out on anything with your-”

“I’m not missing out on anything.” You interrupted him. “I wanted to spend Halloween with you and that’s what we’re going to do. We can go home and watch scary movies while we make snacks and I can listen to you rant about the dumb characters and their bad choices.” You suggested as you two pulled out of the parking lot.

“Maybe we can even carve some pumpkins.” Seonghwa added making you giggle as he smiled at you, his gaze focusing back on the road as he drove you two home. 

-------------------

the scariest part about this story is that seonghwa is driving yall home and he doesn’t even have a driver’s license

[silverbastardgoldenfool]

Realm of the Quarantine Reread End-of-Book Questionnaire: Royal Assassin

Any differences between your first/previous reading experience and this one?

Not as stark a difference as with Assassin’s Apprentice, but definitely still there. Apart from all the obvious stuff, like feeling much more attached to the characters already and picking up more details, I think the biggest change was a complete lack of patience for the teen romance drama lol. There was a decent period where I was feeling quite frustrated with it. Not that I loved it the first time round, but back then I had a very different view of how it fit into the story. I saw it as teaching Fitz a depressing lesson of what it really means to be a royal bastard and a king’s man. Fitz’s literal need (for all he knows he would have been killed if not for his deal with Shrewd) and sense of duty to put his loyalty to his king and country first creates a relationship that is toxic, turbulent and built on lies. And teenage horniness masquerading as love. I saw all that the first time and thought it was just something he had to go through. Now I know it’s something he never really goes through but rather grips onto, romanticises and ultimately goes back to. I know the point of that is meant to be that he finally gets to have something for himself, but why it had to be Molly specifically??? I have very few qualms with Robin’s writing choices overall, but why she chose to write their relationship this way if they really are meant to be is beyond me, especially when so many of her other romances are written so well - it feels like it can’t possibly be unintentional. For most of this book they’re either fighting or fucking and honey! That ain’t love! Hell, Fitz all but sees her as just another demand on his time as the book goes on. But he can’t let her go because she’s the one thing he can point to that makes him feel normal. Not happy, not cherished, not safe. Normal. She’s simply a refuge from his real life. He literally says to Chade “I need her.” I find that so telling, man. It’s not really about her, which is a shame because Molly is great. They’re just really not good for each other.

So yeah. It’s just kind of trying to read all the Fitz/Molly stuff when you know and don’t like what it ultimately culminates in. At the same time… Bee… So I will always be conflicted lol. I just can’t separate the events of Royal Assassin from the furious disappointment I felt when I finished Fool’s Fate. Perhaps I’ll have a new Fool’s Fate experience this time that will make the next re-read a bit easier in regards to Fitz and Molly? But I won’t bet on it lol.

Anyway. It’s not as if I haven’t already said just about everything there possibly is to say about Fitz and Molly yet I also feel like I could go on about it forever. Luckily this is kind of as bad as it gets in terms of how much “screen time” they actually get (apart from Fool’s Assassin maybe? But they don’t bother me too much in that) so yay! I made it! And hopefully it’ll be a good few books before y’all have to endure my ranting about it again :)) Also hopefully this doesn’t give the impression that this read was more bad than good? It was mostly just a particular angsty chunk before they properly get together that was a bit of a slog to get through, but overall I really loved reading this book again and got a lot out of it.

Something you can’t believe you forgot

That Molly punches Fitz in the face hard enough that he bleeds and that Fitz fully intended to punch the Fool for asking if Molly was preggo before seeing he had already been beaten. I pretend I do not see it.

Favourite character introduction moments/scenes

Omfg I was just about to say “huh we didn’t really get any major character intros in this book” bitch Nighteyes???? But in my defence I just. Cannot process the fact that Nighteyes is only really in 3 of 16 books he just feels omnipresent to me BUT his introduction is most definitely iconique and god I love him and he made me cry eight thousand times!

Favourite character arcs

Speaking of Nighteyes: what a glow up. He goes from angry, scared, untrusting little bb to……. Nighteyes. Like. How does one even describe the kind of person Nighteyes becomes. He’s just Nighteyes and I love him with all my fuckin heart!! He is Fitz’s constant… He is wise… He is silly… a comedic genius…… a big, open, unconditional heart. Incomparable. I can’t believe I’ve seen ppl saying they dislike/d Nighteyes……. Honey…… it’s called taste xx

Favourite quote/s

Again no tabs so it’s a bit harder to keep track but there were a few that stuck out enough to copy down. There are a lot of iconic quotes in this book that get shared a lot so I only bothered with ones I didn’t remember.

- “I wince to think of the price willingly paid for loving me.”

- “My soft, clean bed beckoned, like a soft, clean tomorrow.” (mood)

- “I looked and saw they were both made of hungers, like containers made of emptiness.”

Favourite relationships

Kettricken/Verity obviously. I was shocked by how little time they actually have together being in love before Verity leaves??? Because all I remembered was how strong their love is. But the whole journey towards that love is what makes it stand out as an actual compelling story in its own right. This is definitely one of Robin’s greatest skills as a writer; giving the minor characters depth by giving them their own relationships that grow and change and have a life of their own outside of Fitz. It makes the world feel so much more alive.

Also Burrich/Fitz in this book continues to be bittersweet, but with a lot more sweet in there than usual! They fully start out this book as a team. Burrich calling Fitz “FitzChivalry” makes me fuckin emo and idk why even. Burrich does seem to start seeing Fitz a lot more as his own person in this book which changes their dynamic in some rly nice ways. The fact that towards the end of the book Burrich even uses the wit to help Fitz is enough to make me cry tbh - and writing this has made me realise that I’m officially past any uncomplicated good times between Burrich and Fitz y’all mind if I fuckin die real quick!!

Fitz/Verity is soy pure and beautiful. Fitz and the Fool is always, always compelling and complex and tender and perfectly mysterious. But overall you’d have to say Fitz/Nighteyes, hey? They are literally meant to be, in a way so straightforward and undeniable and beautifully simple that I never really know what to say about it. Little brother!!! :’) They literally make me cry all the frickin time lol rip!

Favourite setting

There aren’t that many to choose from in this book! Ima go with the skill river bc hey, Robin’s magic systems are so unique and beautiful and the fact that the skill is written as a kind of a place is really frickin cool and deserves a shoutout.

Favourite chapter

The final chapter (not the epilogue) ummm broke my heart but it is written so beautifully, oh my god, it’s like an out of body experience. I feel like this is kind of when RotE becomes RotE - the first time it really goes to that place that is so fitting yet so unexpected, so beautiful, so tragic, so awful, so visceral. Making use of the genre to really test the limits of humanity; to see how far you can bend a person without breaking them and then refusing to turn away from the consequences. Idk man!! I don’t know how to describe it without sounding like a pretentious dick but it really is that intense and strange and overwhelming for me. There is something in that moment, when Burrich pulls Fitz’s body out of the earth and Fitz/Nighteyes is recoiling from it and deeply terrified… Something about the enormity of the existential questions raised converging with the pinpoint specificity of it all being wrapped up in the story of a character that feels so real and who you care about so deeply… It’s almost written like a horror scene, but that’s not quite the feeling. It’s just the RotE feeling; there are multiple throughout all five series, and it’s what makes these books unlike any other.

Most loved character

Fitz, Nighteyes, the Fool all had my entire heart this book. The Fool is just so sad and pathetic and literally must be protected!! I think I’m kind of obsessed with Burrich? Also I think I almost forgot how much I love Kettricken? She’s a complete badass of course but she’s also got the biggest goddamn heart like…. Who said she was allowed to be such a beautiful person???

But god, everyone. I love them all.

Most hated character

What can I say? Regal is disgostang. Wall Ass a close second.

Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimised by Robin Hobb (most heartbreaking and/or visceral moments)

Shall I list just a few? :)

- Burrich screaming at Fitz through the bars of his jail cell, horrible things you can’t help but feel are at least a little bit true

- Burrich sobbing over Fitz’s dead body repeating, “You aren’t dead, you aren’t dead.”

- Fitz going to Nighteyes before everything went down on the night of the coronation and just fuckin hugging him really tight

- Fitz trying desperately to leave his broken vessel behind but not quite being able to disown his body

- The Fool being beaten

- The Fool being beaten again

- The Fool sprawled and weeping across Shrewd’s dead body

- The Fool really believing for a moment that Fitz had betrayed him and killed Shrewd

- Fitz tending the Fool’s wounds………. bitch….

- Chade giving Fitz a chance to escape with them and Fitz going to kill Serene and Justin instead

- Idk why this is even that sad but Nighteyes saying the only person he loves is Fitz!

- The entire incident with the forged ones literally tearing apart a three year old girl, which I had completely blocked out until now :)

- The fact that Fitz continues to be reminded and traumatised by this incident for the remainder of the book beCAUSE HE IS A GOOD BOY. A VERY GOOD BOY WITH A VERY GOOD HEART.

- Fitz repelling at Nighteyes to try and force their bond broken

- LITTLE BROTHER

- WOLVES HAVE NO KINGS

- High off his face Fitz calling Patience “mother” no shut the fuck up!!!!

Details, observations, spoilery notes made with the benefit of the full picture

- I’ve been trying for ages to decipher when the Fool started falling for Fitz, and I think I’m officially putting my money on their last interaction in AA. “I wish I had a place that was as much me as that place is you.” I mean. If someone said that to me… I’m not a slut but who knows, ya know? (I know this is more a note for the last book but I thought of it while reading this book. So shh.)

- It’s so clear to see this time how much Fitz’s sense of self and politics are affected by his time in the Mountains. He obviously feels much more inclined to their way of thinking about royalty and sacrifice and equality and returns to Buckkeep with a self-respect he’s never really had before. Weird how being among people who don’t just think of you as The Bastard will do that.

- It’s no wonder Fitz becomes so fixated on Molly; he literally has almost nothing else to occupy him and no companionship when she suddenly shows up

- It’s gross that he spies on her, obviously, but you can’t not take into account the fact that Chade has been teaching him since he was ten that this is justifiable behaviour; a reasonable way to gather information and get what you want. Fitz’s lack of social awareness goes further than him just being a little awkward; he has literally been trained to believe the only thing wrong with stalking would be getting caught.

- I’ve seen a few people talk about the fact that Regal isn’t appropriately punished as if it’s bad writing and like, while it is frustrating, it is supposed to be frustrating - it is not a plot hole. It made sense to me the first time I read it and it was even more obvious this time; Regal has the loyalty of the inland duchies. If he were to be publicly punished those dukes would rally behind him and raise hell, and Regal would no longer need to play the part of the dutiful prince. Even if Regal died a “natural” death - something I can’t see Shrewd or Verity orchestrating anyway - the inland dukes would feel that they no longer have a Farseer on their side and may, again, raise hell. It’s a delicate balance that would be outrageously difficult not to topple if you removed Regal from the equation. There is a lot more to it than I’ll bother writing here but yeah. I don’t really know how people can read this book and think that Regal retaining his life and position is some sort of lazy plot contrivance. It was all set up in the first book dude.

- Fitz and Nighteyes meeting in this book is the perfect metaphor for our need for connection versus the fear of inevitable loss. Fitz’s experience tells him that entering into a bond with an animal can only end in pain, yet he can’t resist it. In real life this is especially true with humans and our animal companions, since they almost always have a shorter lifespan than us; signing up to love them is signing up to lose them. But the same is also true of our relationships with other humans. And like Fitz, we have all had our fair share of loss and pain. We all have our reasons to be afraid of the connection we naturally crave. Sometimes we give in to the fear to the point of holding ourselves back from it entirely. That’s where Fitz is at when he meets Nighteyes. But what’s so beautiful about their arc as a metaphor is that it suggests that these connections, if we submit to them, are what keep our vital spark alive. Even when Nighteyes dies later in the series, the sentiment always remains, essentially, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.” Ya boi is projecting bc it’s hard to be vulnerable and make friends as an adult, but I think the observation stands. Love and connection and vulnerability are key threads that run throughout all of Fitz’s story, but in this book it is best represented through him and Nighteyes.

- “I hoped I would not become too adept at lying to myself.” Honey, you got a big storm comin.

- Very inch resting (gay) that Fitz finds it hard to meet the Fool’s eyes. I know almost everyone does bc his eyes are weird, but I reserve the right to reach and I will absolutely NOT be accepting criticism.

- I find it interesting that Fitz says Kettricken’s wit is not strong just because she doesn’t use it exactly the way he does

- I know it’s not meant to be funny but……. The way Fitz described losing his virginity had me literally laughing out loud

- Fitz was really like “okay i better go break my bond with Nighteyes” just cos he and Molly fucked. Teenagers don’t deserve rights.

- You know what? I really, really appreciate how fucking weird these books are lol. What other author would use their magic system to have their characters accidentally intruding on each other’s awkward sex stuff? Okay, maybe a few, but they would do it to be like, edgy and sexy. Robin Hobb just does it to make you cringe so hard you lose several years off of your life.

- But seriously, even apart from the cringe stuff, these books get so strange and out there and like! That’s what magic is for! 

- Bruh. When Fitz is like “omg poor Verity…. He’ll never have what i have with Molly” I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone encapsulate the self-important delusion of teen romance so perfectly lol. Wow.

- Okay some Fitz/Fool stuff that made me lose my tiny mind. Sorry.

- Fitz literally said about the Fool “he burned too brightly” I WILL DIE.

- Fitz is always like, irritated by the Fool… yet positively delighted by his presence at the same time…… okay bitch

- Inch resting how Fitz has always been uncomfortable with the Fool getting serious. I don’t quite know how to put my thoughts on this into words so like. I’ll just put it there. Make of it what you will.

- “Sit on my clothes chest and take your shirt off…” i stopped fucking breathing noah fence

- “I ran my fingers lightly down the line of his jaw, and around his eye socket. At least no bone seemed damaged. ‘Who did this to you?’ I asked him.” my GOD this is literally textbook gay/romance. It hurts me. It physically hurts me.

- Straight from my notes: “I can’t even focus on reading this bc it’s the first time they are tending each other’s wounds and I am a homosexual!” and “the gays are quaking!! (it’s me I’m the gays)

- Okay wow! I think that’s it! Hello if you made it this far! Hope this was remotely coherent and I’m always keen to hear your thoughts on my thoughts :)

Anyone doing a reread feel free to fill this out! You don’t have to use the tag :)

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 503

Oh, Outlander. Le sigh.

On one hand, this episode gave me everything I’ve been wanting for 84 years a long time: Jamie and Claire, together, working as a team as the center of the episode. On the other hand, this very much did *not* feel like an episode of Outlander.

Bottle episodes are fine. The Garrison Commander, The Wedding and A. Malcolm were all basically bottle episodes. Two of those three are a couple of my favorite episodes of the whole series. This episode was like if the times the show decided to cosplay as a different genre (horror this time, rather than the political drama and military drama we’ve seen them attempt in the past) was dialed up to the point it no longer resembled an episode of the same show. From the music to the directing to p much everything.

This episode made me think that like if Outlander was a Venn diagram it would have Claire and Jamie working together as a team, them in the bulk of the episode, and a Good Episode™ of Outlander. You could have two but never all three.

(Also I hate horror movies. They’re just aggressively not jam.)

Ok but now that Marsali is Claire’s apprentice, can we have her and Fergus find out about time travel this season? Because in the books it’s like vaguely implied in MOBY but we never actually get to see that convo.

Also, yes, Marsali, Boston’s pretty rad. Not that I’m biased or anything. In addition to apparently “discovering” penicillin, we also invented Amurrica.

Shorter Claire’s VO: Idgaf about the timeline anymore. Don’t see how that can go wrong.

So was the blurry af title card Marsali practicing suturing? Why did they shoot it like that. It looks more like how they shot Mr. Beardsley’s POV rather than through the moldy bread covers or whatever it was through.

That whole intro part felt like it came from a different episode and was just tacked on to remind us that mold shenanigans are still a thing that is happening.

I do love Marsali, and her with Claire, though, but still.

SUPER SOFT FRASER FACE TOUCHING!

Ok so Jamie is only gonna do another cross burning when he calls his dudes to fight the English, right? Because he did the whole big thing like “I won’t light the flaming dildo again until we’re going to war” and now he’s raising the militia but not doing the fire part when they showed the new wicker dildo right there up high on the Ridge. So like, because that whole bit was about the men being loyal to him, he’s only gonna light it for freedom, right?

FLAMING DILDO OF FREEDOM

So Fergus using Claire’s list of medical tips as his note for the printer is def not going to come back to bite anyone in the ass. Nope. Def not.

Also I love that the whisky thing is Fergus’ thing in the show.

TEAM KEEP GIVING FERGUS AND MARSALI STUFF TO DO BECAUSE I LIKE THEM AND THE BOOKS FORGOT ABOUT THEM.

How many pigs is Marsali gonna butcher to practice her skillz? Also is Deadguy McWhatshisface still in the cellar somewhere?

Mr. Trouble! I love Germain a lot and would love more of him with Grannie and Grandda, pls and thx.

Also, would *love* some Bree and Marsali time. Maybe next episode while the bros are in Brownsville and they’re at the Ridge by themselves? Pretty please?

Ah yes, plantation jokes. In the time when those exist. And you’ve stayed at one. Come on, Bree.

Oh look, Jamie and Claire not keeping secrets from each other. Good. Well done, kids.

But they’re keeping it from Bree. Who, as the grown-ass woman at the center of the Bonnet bullshit, fucking deserves to know. So fuck y’all for not telling her.

She knows, I know that, but they think she doesn’t sooo, do better.

Lots of callback references from Jamie this season. The thing about his scars last week, Black Jack, the brand Claire cut off and his dad’s stroke this week. Ngl, the show is so different now that those references don’t even seem like they’re from the same series.

Gonna take this twin bit as an opportunity to remind everyone to watch Orphan Black.

Kezzie leaves-his-pants-for-the-kittens Beardsley, too good for this world. Too pure.

You come across a creepy fucking cabin in the woods, that you know is the home of a physically abusive fuckwad, and you immediately split up? Claire. Girl. You’ve seen horror movies.

OMG HAI CATS! I GOT ALL EXCITED THAT ADSO MIGHT BE ONE OF THE PANTS!KITTENS BUT ALAS. SOON. SOON, MY FLOOFER.

I fucking hate jump scares. Like I knew her face was gonna be in the window when Jamie turned back around, because this episode is the most trope-y horror short ever, but still. I fucking do not like horror movies, y’all, and jump scares are cheap.

Jamie on the other hand has never seen a horror movie and clearly doesn’t know that you DO NOT GO INTO THE CREEPY CABIN WITH THE CREEPY JUMP SCARE LADY.

Omfg with the banging door, it’s like they were like ok let’s read Making Horror Movies for Dummies and then put in ALL THE TROPES.

Also, this might be the one instance where the book name was better. Why the fuck would you name the goat Billy when Hiram is *clearly* a superior goat name.

CLAIRE. WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING UPSTAIRS. YOU ARE THE GIRL WHO GETS KILLED FIRST IN THE HORROR MOVIE. WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS. STOP BEING A DUMBASS.

Oh, hey, another jump scare. I’m both bored and annoyed.

Like we finally get an episode that is centered on Jamie and Claire. Together. Team Fraser. And it’s this nonsense.

I cannot with this show, tbh.

“Poor men bleed for rich men’s gold.” Two hundred and fifty fucking years later and it’s still true, Mrs. Findlay.

Did they borrow zombie noises from The Walking Dead for this episode? I swear to fuck every time Mr. Beardsley makes a noise I’m like uhhh, what show am I watching again?

“What you must have done to deserve this.” Yeah, like don’t @ me. I know abuse is fucking wrong. But you know what? This is fucked-up-past-times. Fanny’s out here by herself with no rights and no help. Go for it, girl. Fuck that fucker up.

This season on AHS: Beardsley Farm, the dulcet sounds of afterbirth squelching.

Here I was, all pleased that we were spared Breast Milk and Periodpalooza in the premiere. I should have known better. And yes, I know it’s natural and a part of childbirth, yada yada. I watch Call the Midwife and even *they* don’t fucking squelch it like that.

The subtitles spell Baltimore “Baltimoe” and now I have Another Op’nin’, Another Show from Kiss Me, Kate stuck in my head.

Is it too much to ask that the show find some way to demonstrate the past being The Worst™ that isn’t women and children getting abused or raped or murdered by shitty men? We already know men are shitty. Men are still shitty.

Like seriously, who the fuck does Mr. Beardsley think he is, murdering all his wives for not having babies, Henry VIII?!

“Having a baby doesn’t make me a mother.” Yuppppp. You do what’s best for you, Fanny.

“And your name is Sassenach.” And she’s not even like and “that’s a weird ass name.” I lowkey love Fanny Beardsley?

I still wish they skipped this whole thing though.

Omfg Jamie. BuT tHeY wOn’T bE wItH tHeIr FaMiLy. YOU *HAVE* TO KNOW CLAIRE’S RIGHT. YOU CAN’T BE THAT FUCKING THICK. NO SHIT THE FUTURE IS SAFER. Also, they’re fucking adults. They are their own family. You left Jenny. Young Ian stayed with the Mohawk. PEOPLE GROW UP AND LEAVE AND IT’S OK.

“Maybe she’s gone to find help.” Apparently Jamie *is* that thick. Really, bro? She left to find help? Really? Fucking dumbass.

“And we’ll seek Mrs. Beardsley as we travel.” “We won’t find her.” That’s a nice way of phrasing “You’re a fucking dumbass, she’s gone and claimed her freedom for the first time in her life. Let her have that, you fuckwit.”

The shot of the leaves blowing is literally like straight out of The Walking Dead.

Also loool at the birds.

Oh hey, next week we get all the dumb Brownsville stuff! And probs little to no Claire and Jamie. Exciting times.

[aspiring-wildfire]

MAG 166

Martin’s so unbothered and curious i love him

God the way Jon talks about killing not!sasha he sounds like he’s trying to convince himself like no!! Babe!!! You did good!!!!

Is Helen coming out of a frickin trapdoor??

Helen: I Will Cause Problems On Purpose

I love my knife wife

I feel like the eye ruling has interesting and alarming implications for the rest of the season and i am Afraid

Jon confirmed as the eye’s favorite avatar

I love how chill Martin is abt Jon being like top eldritch fear entity he’s just like “oh okay dope”

“Because I’m ashamed, Martin! Ashamed I destroyed the world and am being rewarded for it, the fact that I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a fucking tourist, destroying whoever i please, the fact that I enjoyed it and the fact that there are so many others that i still want to revenge myself on!” JON BABY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH STOP THINKING YOU’RE EVIL AND BAD PLEASE (also does this mean Jon is the archives’ new Designated Sayer of Fuck??)

“...no,no i actually think you’re good on that front” “what?” “Yeah, i think we should go for it, get our murder on” FUCK YES MARTIN BLACKWOOD MURDEROUS BITCH OF MY HEART god they’re so perfect together and Martin is just so fucking genre savvy like he’s not abt to start feeling bad for killing monsters fuck that 100000/10, Martin i adore u

“Yes, Martin!” Helen’s so delighted omfg

“If you want to stop them and have the power to, then, they yeah, lets do it, let’s go full kill bill!” fuck it up baby

“...I- I haven’t seen it” god Jon youre such a dork i love you so much

“Oh Martin, I am so proud of you! Can I come?” Simultaneously: “no” (Jon’s exasperation here is adorable) “so that’s a strong maybe then?” Helen is peak chaotic energy she’s just vibin i love it

“Well, I’ll see you avenging angels later, don’t be strangers!” Helen you’re a delight

Did the buried just change people into worms?? I mean thats horrifying but also an odd choice

Poor Sam

“When had the crushing pressure in his chest become literal?” Oof okay that hits a little close to home

Oh wait the idea of the buried just making the metaphorical crushing weight of debt and poverty and stuff literal is... really unsettling and really fucking cool

What would happen if you escaped the buried in this world and just like... tripped into the vast? Like would that scare you or would it just be lik, catharsis?

Jonny’s really coming for capitalism in this season and I for one am absolutely onboard

This has really just further complicated my thoughts on the Buried

Like I’ve always been mostly okay with it and the idea of just having weight on you sounds kind of nice (weighted blankets are literally made for this im not weird for thinking it) but like,,, this statement is very unsettling and the thought of being just crushed and stationary for so long is A Lot

Woah wait the rain in the new world is tears from the eye that is so so cool

Jonny’s worldbuilding is amazing man

Oh god this is so fucking sad and so upsetting like to work so hard to get to the surface and then just be washed back down when you’re so close

Eughh no I get why the myth of Sysiphus is so unsettling

Choosing between fear and despair is an anxiety and depression #mood

Oh god the fighting between Sam and Richard and them chewing through each other oh my god i think I’m gonna be sick

Wow Jonny really said “the poor and working class tear each other apart for the dream of an unreachable future while trapped in the horrifying inescapable system of oppression that is capitalism” and i think that’s very sexy of him

“God i hate the buried” me too Jon me too (also how much trauma did that probably just dredge up for him oh my god)

Martin just being really fucking bored while waiting for Jon is so fucfking funny omg

“Come on Jon, how long does it take to describe scary mud” BABE

The muffled screaming is awful a+ soundscaping Alex

Martin interacting somewhat normally with all the victims they come across is my favorite like he’s really just taking it all in stride

“Seriously? A spade? isn’t that like, kind of insensitive?? Given where you are???” Martin just not having it with the Web’s shit is the best thing and i love him

he’s really just not fucking playing along with Annabel huh what a bitch i love you Martin

“I want to help you, of course” “no, thank you” what a genre savvy angel

Martin really just hung up on the head avatar of the entity of manipulation and pulling strings what a fucking power move

*faint sounds of distant wailing* “i know, right?” MARTIN

Honestly ofc he talks to all these people who cant respond or even hear him he talked to the tape recorders i really shouldn’t be surprised

[ko2vo]

(djdgdfkdjhlk i have to post it like this because tumblr formatted the answer weirdly)

THANK YOU ANON ;w; <33

Ye, I’ve mentioned it in passing but I really don’t broadcast it cuz it becomes somewhat pertinent in the story? But it’s not really supposed to be a surprise either, he just is what he is.

I’m gonna put stuff im thinking about under a read more cuz I’m getting somewhat rambly whilst thinking about how people have done transgender characters in comics before.

Even though I don’t broadcast Ray’s transness, I also don’t really want to sensationalize the outing of a passing trans character by making it a secret until its being touched on in the story cuz I’ve seen it done before with varying results. Of course, there are always a lot of really happy trans people and allies at reveals like that, but there’s also an annoying amount of ‘this character had no hints about being trans, this is a bullshit pc culture move’ to extreme fandom discourse about a character’s actual gender identity once it becomes ‘in question’. A lot of this is stuff I’m remembering from the comics community five plus years ago where it was a spicy subject, but even dabbling in current comics that touch gender, there’s a lot of very heated discussions that comes down to some very strange gender policing.

I remember getting really upset about the discussions around Mutsuki from Tokyo Ghoul RE cuz his was a really fascinating case (I am not caught up so im just going by what pronouns i remember him using). He was introduced as male, an antagonist outed him in a really upsetting panel where his binder was exposed and he was called a woman, and the fandom exploded into some really interesting discourse but also some really REALLY transphobic discourse. This was further exacerbated because the manga went into an arc where all the male characters (including him) crossdressed to go undercover and yea, pre-op trans masc character in feminine clothes really confuses people. Also the antagonist gets really creepily obsessed/stalkerish with Mutsuki and writes love letters addressing him as she/her, while literally every other character used he/him. I actually really wanna catch up and see what went down with all that, but yea it had a surprising impact on me.

However, the first popular webcomic that I read where a major “trans reveal” happened was Prague Race. The artist kept a really tight lid on a certain major character’s status as a trans man and on the page that it was revealed, SO MUCH DISCOURSE omfg. And I think that’s also because this comic had been about five years old at this point? Mutsuki was introduced and revealed only a few chapters into RE, but webcomics take so much longer to make that like, I had fallen behind considerably but my friend who kept up with the comic messaged me about the reveal and i caught up on a couple years worth of backlog pages.

Both these cases were notable too because neither comic was LGBT or romance driven, Tokyo Ghoul was a supernatural horror and Prague Race was a fantasy adventure and I think that’s why the discourse became particularly upsetting for me. LGBT+ persons always seemed to get relegated to romance stories or stories that explicitly were for the community and yea, its easier to find those stories but I kinda really enjoy just stumbling across LGBT narratives in other genres when i least expect it? Especially ones that are trans too!

But trans characters always seem to wind up as the topic of some really heated debates about gender identity, visibility, and legitimacy. I dunno, it’s pretty stressful tbh.

dfkjdflhkj ANYWAY TLDR I’ve rambled a lot, but yeah, Ray is a trans guy and eventually that detail will get touched upon in Bad Seeds but it’s not gonna be a big reveal of any kind. It clears up certain motivations perhaps but I personally wouldn’t consider it a story spoiler. I definitely mentioned it in this post years ago pffff but that is an old old post and also a whole lot of OC rambling in general but Daniel, Poet, and Ray all have their own little sections if ya want some delicious somewhat outdated content wiiiiinks