#yeah i rp'd with myself

[what-the-flux]

Future status of this blog.

Hey you lovely peeps, it's just me giving a bit of an update for those that noticed the slowdown in my posts in recent months. I feel like talking on a personal level for once so if you don't want to read the whole thing and just want the tl;dr, here it is: This side blog will soon be going on an indefinite hiatus. I may come back to the fandom eventually but no telling at this point in time. If you’ve ever enjoyed my art, writing and characters here then you might enjoy yet more of that in original worldbuilding settings and a motley of other fandom or AU stuff then please follow my main @sparkyopteryx, I’ll be getting more active on that page again. I do have a couple more GW2 pieces to finish up and post at the end of this year so I hope you guys enjoy a sort of "last hurrah" from me before I redirect my focus. <3 If you want to read my open diary thoughts as I wax nostalgic and wistful then clicky the read more (DISCLAIMER: there is absolutely no callouts to individuals or guilds of any kind mentioned here and no name dropping. It's all just me and my thoughts and feelings, so hopefully that assuages any anxiety).

I've been here a looooong time. I checked my archive to see how far this blog goes back and whoof, January 2015. February 2015 was me posting my very first GW2 art on here, surprise surprise it was an asura. (technically not my very first asura art, very first asura I drew was Quinn in July 2014). Didn't know how deep the GW2 claws would get me and hold me for a decade, no other mmo had that kind of effect on me. WoW wasn't even close. DDO, Neverwinter Nights, Perfect World, all a piddly drop in the bucket compared to GW2. So much has happened to me since starting this game up to this point. I transitioned. I changed my name. I moved to a different living space. I started new relationships. I acquired two best friends. I went bald and grew a beard! This game rewired my creative brain, and I say that with....mixed thoughts and feelings. I've written SO many character stories and rp'd a ton and made so many characters that in some cases are up there with some of my most important muses I've ever created now. I love so many of them so much I'm picking them up and taking them with me to my other universes because I can't bear the idea of just leaving them behind and many of them are just too powerful to be contained (looking at you Oort, Euphix, Hoskk....yeah a lot of them). I say mixed though because also, it was to the detriment of my original settings. GW2 had me in a choke hold, which normally is fine with hyperfixations but this was a fixation that spanned actual years and I'm really feeling needing a change for a while and I miss creatively living in the spaces from my settings that I've carried around with me since elementary school. There's also the social aspect. I acknowledge the ever-shifting dynamic of fandoms, friend groups and how social media and how a social game like an MMO shapes things over the years. It's all a part of putting yourself out there with other people, I get all that. I have a hard time putting my thoughts into words but I still want to express myself in some fashion so I'm going to do my best but it's a complex, many faceted thing. I've met and made friends over the years but kept a tiny few. I've seen how other platforms and changing social expectations have shaped how people interact in fandom spaces. It's fascinating, to say the least. But as much as I've tried to put myself out there over the years, GW2 is the one that has given me the most dread, anxiety or general feeling of always being in the orbit or outlier. No, I don't care about being popular. But we're always trying to look for somewhere to belong in these fandom spaces you know? I am a firm believer of how we're always creating for ourselves and that is what I always do, every day I create it's cuz it's mine and I want to see it out in the world. Art is also a communal work, that's what makes art, writing, music and such unique. We make something from nothing for us, but also because we do it to share something of ourselves to others. I've gotten all sorts of beautiful comments and feedback and very occasionally the joyous feeling of someone asking about a character or idea. I've also given these things, because I genuinely love peoples' characters and hearing what they think up. I always hoped to carve my niche and feel at ease with a group of people long term. To get that feeling of communal exchange of ideas, characters, really deep rp and character interaction and all that. Ultimately though it's never been a lasting thing here and unfortunately I have a full time day job, finite amount of energy and focus for me to be constantly trying to be the one to initiate, maintain a social presence and be regularly updating with art and posts. NOT me fishing for sympathy or any of that so any of those comments are unnecessary. It’s alright, it’s just a thing that happens anywhere but it’s happened to me consistently here so I’m just not expending my energy overextending anymore and moving on.

As I said before, it’s complex. It’s not all negative, but I’m exhausted and burned out so it means simply putting down things that feel like they aren’t doing it for me anymore or aren’t making me feel fulfilled and happy in some way, because goodness knows I need every scrap of it with all the stuff I’m dealing with in my life these days. This space may be active again one day! Who knows! I sure don’t. I don’t make promises one way or another because no one can predict what will happen a month or a year from now. But regardless of whatever happens I hope to be able to still interact with and share other spaces in other capacities, and if not I wish you the best of luck in all your creative and personal endeavors! If you’re still actually reading this, I want to say that at the end of the day, many of you have given me support even in minor ways and for that I earnestly say thank you, it was people like you that helped keep me going. Even the people that I don’t really talk to anymore, you count too because we shared a lovely if fleeting thing. That’s about it from me though. Sorry if it got a bit rambly in parts, the original draft of this was much longer and probably even harder to follow. These are my feelings and my experiences I’m talking about, not general sweeping statements that should be taken as fact and I myself do not consider them facts, just what I’ve faced and what I’ve observed and felt. In the event this really is the end of GW2 for me, here’s to a decade of art, rp, writing, characters, silliness and good times. Tyria really did a number on me and for that I am thankful, I will keep the good memories with me. Excelsior! --Sparky

[skepsiss]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by @strangersteddierthings, I've never even thought about half of these questions, so.... we're gunna go on a journey together. I MISSED SEVERAL QUESTIONS LMAO. LEMME UPDATE.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

18 (I only post like 1/3 of my fics on AO3)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

66,922. I pay such little attention to this kinda stuff xD

3. What fandoms do you write for?

A lot... and a lot more than what is listed on my AO3. If we're friends I'll literally just message you a 2k+ fic in a DM for funsies.

Stranger Things (TV 2016) (8)

Overwatch (Video Game) (5)

Teen Wolf (TV) (1)

Castlevania (Cartoon 2017-2021) (1)

Critical Role (Web Series) (1)

Promare (2019) (1)

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018) (1)

DC Comics / Batman (Tim Drake / Kon-El)

Orphan Black

Marvel (Steve/Tony)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Basket Ball Shorts

Roadrat: The Fire that Covered the World

The Comfort of Warmth (Lio/Galo)

Fifty-fifty (Roadhog / Junkrat)

Perspective (Caleb / Essek)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes. As soon as I see them I will reply with a thank you or to engage with someone's question/musings/etc.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably a Roadrat one. It's been a while since I've read my work, but The Things They Lost is a Roadrat fic where I explored a bunch of like... when Junkrat lost his arm and stuff like that. Brutal, tbh. Next closest is my Alucard (OT3) Castlevania fic where he is BIG SAD about Trevor and Sypha not being there. Nights Spent Alone.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

UUuhhhuhuhuh..... I mostly write sad shit LOL. Milkshakes has a happy ending. It's a 2 part modern-day Steddie fic about the boys asking each other out on a date over Instagram.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've never seen any hate on my fics before.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Uhh, yeah. I do. PWP or With Plot. I like full stories that have smut that BELONGS there, but then we've got just straight-up PWP. That is what Basketball short is tbh.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No, never written a crossover. I've written lots of AUs though.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No. Dunno how I'd figure that out.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope. Dunno what that would look like tbh.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Steddie; for right now. My other top 3 are Harley/Ivy, Tim/Kon-El, and Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

NO IDEA. Lol, all my unfinished WIPs are either ones I have no interest in finishing (Roadrat), or ones I can complete faith in being able to finish (Steddie)

16. What are your writing strengths?

Speed. I can compose a story very quickly and put it together.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I never promote myself/share. I'm really bad at sharing my works. Additionally, I'm bad at finishing things before I lose interest.... eep.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Uuhh maybe. I def have some Ancient Greek and Latin in my up-coming Robin (Stobin platonic) fic.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I'm not sure... maybe Batman (Tim/Jason or Tim/Kon). I RP'd A LOT from ages 13-18 and had like 5-8 rps going at once for a whole bunch of fandoms. (Naruto, OCs in the Star Wars universe, Tim/Kon, and more I can't remember atm).

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Ooohhh, I dunno. I'm bad at picking favourites. Right now I'm pretty proud of my Because I Want You Steddie fic. It's Steve and Eddie as 30-year-olds with kids. They broke up in their 20s and are trying to get back together in their 30s. Eddie has a complete breakdown in it, but Steve is there to tell him that he loves him.

I don't think about this stuff at all xDDD Fic writing is just a pass time for me. This will be the first time EVER in over 18 years of writing fic that I've EVER participated in an exchange/Big Bang. I'll tag @medusapelagia @oh-stars @br0ck-eddie @kallisto-k

[wuvrevue]

orange indigo and white for the ask game !

orange: do you tend to make your own transparents? if yes, is it hard or do you like it? 

i dont make as many transparents as i used to but usually if it needs to be mad transparent i will try to do it myself. i feel more original that way lol tho i dont enjoy it

indigo: give a few characters you like editing! are these similar characters to your own favorites or are they just fun to edit?

uhhhhhhh in terms of characters i like editing its always like if they have artists that look good in my style or that i like i usually enjoy it more . sour mmd models and wada arco drawn characters are big ones for me... and yeah typically they tend to be characters i like

white: what got you into editing and what motivates you to continue?

i got into editing thru tumblr rping LOOOOL i mean i rp'd elsewhere before being like uguhh and moving to tumblr. the reason i continue wellll i feel like its one of the only things im good at and i like making things that people like :|

[monterraverde]

So hows about yourself! What was it about Rika that drew you to her as a muse?

Also, while i can tell from our interactions that its positive, im still curious what your thoughts are on duplicates.

//To put it really loosely-

"She just like me for real"

But in more detail- The interaction she had with Poppy spoke to me. The big sister/Mom friend energy she has really resonated because it's how I often am IRL. I'm the person who has the sewing kit and first aid supplies in my bag if we're at a convention, and granola bars and water bottles and ibuprofen. I'm the worrywart who loves kids and will leap at the chance to care for them.

And then she just has this amazing aesthetic on top of it, like you can hardly tell she's a ground type expert from how she carries herself and dresses- I thought maybe she was grass type because her hair looks like leaves! But they took the idea of "Grounded' and "Down to earth" and went really thematic with it, and I love that about her.

I also love that they played with the idea of unconventional beauty when it came to her- She's built like a bookmark but her face and the way her hair frames it is STUNNINGLY beautiful to look at... that and I'm a sucker for long as hell ponytails since I have one myself lol, and everyone draws it differently- The amount of times I've seen that thing drawn as a full on whip and waving in the wind is just fun and playful.

I could probably go on gushing about her for hours tbh lol, but she's been probably the muse I've had the most fun playing with in my entire 18 years of RP.

As for dupes: I LOVE SEEING DUPES!! Everyone has their own take and perception on a character and i LOVE seeing where they go!! The one I've RP'd with most is @clodsiremom and hers is Violet verse while mine is mainly Scarlet- But she's also 10 years older then my Rika and didn't have the sister to take care of, so their personalities are similar but also VERY different because of their collective experiences! So yeah! Bring on all the dupes! Let them learn from one another! Sisters they never knew they had!

[bottleofbabes]

UGH UGH UGHHHHH

@lunarxdaydream

For Every “UGH” I Get I Will Say A Pet Peeve I (The Mun) Have About Roleplaying.

I feel like this is a very common one, but vague blogging about other people/blogs is a huge pet peeve of mine in the RPC or in life, really. I am a very firm believer of if you have such a huge problem with someone that you HAVE to talk about it, then it would be more productive if you went to that person and had a discussion instead of gossiping like a coward on dash. That's what cowards do. Be an adult, go to that person and talk it out.

Im not a fan of the "well i cant rp with that blog because they use [insert random fc]" because that's mad childish. If you have certain opinions on an fc/canon character than that is your problem, not the mun's. You might have just cut out a valuable opportunity to write with some of their other muses instead. No one said you had to interact with that particular muse. In addition, 9 times out of 10 you don't own that damn fc anyway lol. So who are you to deem someone unworthy of your time for a specific choice in fc? You're just being mean at that point.

This is a big one; Im very tired of the cliquey nature of tumblr these days. I came back to tumblr Jan 2022 because i missed the beautiful connections I made before i left in 2014. I met some of my best friends in those days, and back then every one rp'd with everyone. Yeah there was drama as in every RPC but as long as you could write legibly and you weren't a jerk, everyone had a great time. Nowadays i just feel like people get in their little groups and rp with the same 3 or 4 people. I understand everyone has standards, I do too and I wont be changing mine for anyone, but I feel like I give most people a fair chance if I see content i like on their blog especially if i go so far as to follow back. Ive seen several of my friends, including myself attempt rping/plotting/become mutuals with people and not even getting the time of day. But replies are flying out to those same 3 people lol. Im not here to tell anyone who they can or can't rp with, but don't become mutuals with people you dont even plan to rp with. If you're going to ignore everyone who attempts to rp with you, then you should move to a more private setting and stop wasting everyone's time lol

[xander-amyntoros]

“We were lovers and murderers, innocents and soldiers. And without us, Alexander would have been only a man. Instead he was a god.”

Location: Temple of Apollo, Elysium With: @kairosxevander,  Achilles, Alexander of Macedon, and @atlasxrose Trigger Warnings: none Notes: This is like a little over 2k words, it’s nothing like Shane’s, pls read with the bar very low, thank u.

“If you wish to become good and upright, throw aside the rag you have on your head and come to me. But you certainly cannot, for you are held fast by the thighs of Hephaestion.”

Diogenes was always Alexander’s favorite. He could remember how the man insulted Alexander to his face, claiming that the only thing he had wanted was for Alexander to “stand a little out of my sun.” Alexander had laughed, the melodic sound that it was, and easily claimed that if he were not Alexander, then he would rather be Diogenes. And then the man had stated that Alexander was only held by Hephaestion’s thighs, and Hephaestion had never let the ruler live it down. 

Hephaestion felt like that moment had been lost to many – but it stuck in his mind as he made his way up towards the old temple of Apollo. As did the memories about how he and Alexander had truly been. As historians fought over what they did, what they said – who they were to one another. None of them had ever bothered Hephaestion. In fact, he hardly paid attention to it throughout the centuries. He’d instead ensured that no one would find his tomb, and no one would find Alexander’s. For if they did, it would be empty. 

It was the temple that offered him a reprieve, something that Xander didn’t know he’d find there. There was nothing but the breeze that filled the air. No voices, no birds – just the wind. The vampire allowed his eyes to close, blocking out most of his other senses. He could finally hear the waves crashing against the rocks along the bay, and with it – the feeling of being watched. It took less than a moment for Xander to turn around, gaze fixed on the man that had managed to catch him by surprise.

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” 

The stranger’s tone was kind, and Xander could only keep his distance out of the wariness he was feeling. Was this a hallucination? The Mati that plagued many in the town below had seemingly caught up to him, now. “Who are you?” 

“I am…you. Kind of? I don’t know; you and Alexander always said you were like me and Achilles. So I think that makes us a little similar.” Blue eyes shined with mirth, and it didn’t take much for the vampire to recognize what his words meant.

“You are Patroclus.” Philtatos, most beloved. A name given to the man before him, in the flesh. The one who could grant him mortality, return his soul to himself – and out of Persephone’s grasp. All at once, Xander could hear Alexander’s voice in his head. Even the setting changed, with the dirt and the city of Susa behind him, as ugly as it had been. Alexander was there, hands firmly placed against his naked shoulders, ”I’ll have to train more to beat you in a fair race, fleet-footed Patroclus that you are.”

Hephaestion had returned the jest, “If you think it would help. But did swift-footed Achilles ever beat Patroclus?”

Patroclus seemingly had made his way closer, sitting on one of the broken pillars not far from Xander. When the vampire was finally done with his own memories, he focused on Patroclus yet again. Broad shouldered, shorter than he – but there was a calmness about him. One that spoke of a tragedy that he’d witnessed, and the victories that he’d seen. 

“I know what you can do.” The words weren’t a threat, more like a fact that Xander was hoping to be confirmed. The fight with Atlas was ever present in the back of his mind. It had been his mistake to think that a mere mortal of less than three decades would know what it was like to love for eternity.

“You do not give him the credit you should.” Patroclus had ignored his comment, instead, gazing at Hephaestion like he could see right through him. “The fury is young. But you love him despite your anger, and he, you. Not many get another love like this in their life.” 

Xander could feel himself getting defensive. After all, what was he to a fury? Another creature that deserved the Underworld. The horrors that he’d unleashed upon those that had wronged him, upon those that had wronged Alexander – the centuries following simply an easy way to pass the time. Kingdoms had fallen because of him. “Atlas has his own life to live, and that’s seemingly all he cares for. Maybe it was selfish of me to wish for a second life with him.” 

The rift looked thoughtful, but the small smile that had been present a few minutes earlier returned once more. “Two souls abiding one body. That’s what Aristotle defined as friendship, right?” Patroclus ran his finger over the spine of the book he held; a weathered old version of the Song of Ilium. It was similar to the one that Alexander had insisted he carry around – the one he’d slept with beneath his damn pillow. “Does he share yours? You, his?” 

It wasn’t a question that Xander expected, and for once, he couldn’t find the willpower to play into this word game that Patroclus was intent on playing. Perhaps Rae’s…? Again, Xander had to compose himself before he acted like a fool. “I don’t love with half my being.” 

“No one said you did. But, anyway, that’s not why I’m here. You know what I can do, and I’m here to offer it to you. Or….I could heal your soul and send it straight to Elysium. There would be no mortal life you would have to live. I know what it’s like to be waiting on the other side. To wonder if you’ll ever see them again.” Patroclus stood up once more, and he stopped a few paces from Hephaestion. 

The vampire had lived hundreds of lifetimes, watched the old world fall, and a new one rise in its place. Truth be told – there was no place for him among the present. He, like the others who were over two thousand years within the city, would only belong to the gods and their afterlife. 

The offer was there, and it was within Hephaestion’s grasp. To leave the world behind, to be transported to a place that he had only dreamed of before – a place that he wasn’t sure existed up until he met Hyacinth. The beloved of Apollo. Perhaps that was the true retribution; to be told of what would happen. After all, Alexander had manhandled Apollo’s pythia once before, perhaps Hyacinth’s message had simply been revenge.

“Why would you do that for me?” Xander had done little to warrant such kindness from the rift, and yet there was no catch. Patroclus wasn’t making him do something for any of this. Truly, the poets were right about his heart. 

“Perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone.” And when Patroclus had been reunited with Achilles in the darkened veil between worlds, their hands had met, and light had spilled in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out of the sun. Patroclus had become complete – he knew the feeling of being barred from crossing the one line that he had deserved. 

The silence between them was deafening. But before Xander could make any sort of decision, wrap his mind around what this would mean for him, Patroclus was placing his hand against his chest. “I can help you make your decision.” 

The rift and his features faded, as did the temple of Apollo. Instead, he found himself in front of a palace. Different creatures were sculpted in silver and white marble along the doorways. Scenes of Perseus and Medusa, of Athena and Poseidon, of Zeus himself – carved out of pure gold that rivaled what the Parthenon had looked like in all of its glory. Persian, and even Egyptian statues littered the courtyard. Water flowed between the cracks of the stones beneath his feet, designed perfectly, like it moved with the structure, not against it. Even the giant gold Athena could not rival this place’s allure, as the sky stretched as far as the eye could see, and field’s that blossomed with flowers between each large cliffside that held hovel upon hovel, temple upon temple, seemed to move with the land. There showed no signs of strife, no signs of death – just a perfection that mortals could not understand without knowing what the rest of the world was like.

Persephone’s domain. Patroclus’ voice was within his ear, but the rift was still nowhere to be seen. 

Elysium. Why here? Xander knew, already, that his soul was his own once again. If Persephone owned it, it would’ve been impossible for Patroclus to push him through the veil like he had. But even now, standing upon dusty ground, Xander felt himself breathe. But this was not just Patroclus’ doing, no. The rift was barred to the other side of the veil – it was another’s doing. This was a projection, his soul into another place while his body remained on earth. But a voice had Hephaestion’s oh so human heart skip a beat, and it drew all of his attention away from his thoughts. 

“I shall erect a statue of a mighty lion here in Ecbatana in your memory. And you will be celebrated in Babylon with its great kings, for you deserve no less and yet so much more.”

For a man whose light burned out far too soon, his presence had yet to change. To Hephaestion, the voice was enough to bring light back into his darkest moments, and for his soul to feel complete once more. Alexander of Macedon had been larger than life to many, and all the energy in any room was pulled in his direction whenever he entered. But to Hephaestion, he had been eromenos: beloved.

“Those were the words I said to you after you died. And yet I thought that when I got here, you’d be waiting for me. Instead, you had the audacity to make the King of Kings wait. Who do you think you are?”

Perhaps it was too human to feel his heart hammering against his ribcage, as over twenty four hundred years had yet to stop the same feeling of love that was all consuming. “I am Hephaestion. And you’re a pompous king who named a city after his ox-head of a horse.”

Alexander’s smile was bright, his mismatched eyes never leaving the features of Hephaestion’s face. “Don’t you think you have made me wait long enough?”

The distance between them was closed within moments, their embrace like water cooling a blazing sword while being forged. After all, Alexander had burned with the heat of the sun, bringing heat but also the possibility of scalding all that he touched. Hephaestion had tempered him, and all was right within their corner of Elysium. “Hyacinth – he told me you…” Even as they broke apart briefly, Hephaestion’s hand curled around the back of Alexander’s neck to keep him close. It was the movement behind Alexander that caught his eyes. Another man stood, a regal glow about him that was so god-like, it was difficult to stare at for longer than a few moments. The armor he wore was forged by the gods themselves, and it left little to the imagination as to whom this could be. 

“I always said I was a descendant of Achilles. But you used to say that not even Achilles could create an ass from a mule.” Alexander’s tone was light, like his purpose had been all but filled. “He came for me. Said it was bad enough that I tried to fight not one god, but all of them. Clearly he didn’t know how stubborn one man could be.”

Achilles mumbled something about how Patroclus owed him – most likely for using his demi-god powers to keep the veil open long enough for their souls to unite. Hephaestion could only imagine how much Alexander had talked – no, fangirled. Achilles certainly wouldn’t be visiting the other any time soon. 

“I’m sorry. I never meant to keep you waiting,” Hephaestion wasn’t even sure it was his own voice he was hearing, the emotion in it almost foreign. As their foreheads touched, it was Patroclus’ voice that interrupted him in his head.

We don’t have much time. Persephone is always vigilant. Make your decision, Hephaestion.

Hephaestion shut his eyes, opening them only as he felt the press of lips against his own. There was a life to be had, here, with Alexander – and yet...as Hephaestion broke the kiss, he could already feel the heartache at leaving behind the one other person who had ever held his heart so easily in his hands. “Alexander...I can’t stay.”

“I have seen you, with him.” Alexander’s tone held only the slightest hint of jealousy, but there was more to it than that. There was gratitude, and even hope, as he placed his hands on Hephaestion’s cheeks. “The joy I see in your eyes – it is what you deserve. I will always wait for you, Hephaestion. And one day, when I get to meet this fury who dares hold your heart as much as I do, I am sure I will feel the same about him.”

Hephaestion had expected more of a fight than he’d been given. After all, it wasn’t often that someone chose another over Alexander the Great. But despite their altercations, and despite the disappointment that had rendered Xander sick with anxiety, he had never loved with half of his being. He’d chosen Atlas once before, and he would do so again. 

“Until then, eromenos.”

With a gasp, Xander felt himself fall against the floor of the ruined temple. The air that he sucked in between his lips made his lungs ache. They hadn’t been used in twenty four hundred years, after all. The cough that rattled his body was also unexpected, and for a moment, he was certain he was going to die simply because he couldn’t remember how to breathe. 

Patroclus’ palm was on his back, however, and he could see how drained the rift looked. Blue eyes met blue, and there was a silent understanding. In fact, Xander was almost certain that Patroclus was smirking; damn these rifts. He would bet that Patroclus always knew what he would choose. 

“You have a great love waiting for you, Hephaestion.” Patroclus helped the human to his feet, brushing off the dust from his jacket, “Now go and forgive him, and forgive yourself.”

It was those words that Xander would hold on to. As Atlas had said, anger was ever present – within them both – but it was love that would unite them.

[bees-for-the-wildmother]

My friends may have thought I was exaggerating, may have thought I was being sarcastic or overdramatic when I told them during the Saturday’s game that I was going to have trouble sleeping that night.  Because when the DM described the setting and turned on the soundtrack for the game--creepy, rainy, haunted house exploration music--and had several additional sound bits on his phone--a little ghost girl talking to us--I knew I was going to have trouble. 

My imagination makes every scary movie, etc. ten times worse than it is, and D&D is all in your imagination, so my brain decided to make it really bad. So yeah, the past two nights I’ve stayed up much later than I usually do.  Because I turn off my light to go to sleep and then immediately turn it back on and say I’m going to read a little bit more to distract and exhaust my brain, so I can actually get to sleep quickly.  And now I’m super tired.

I don’t do scary movies.  I don’t do scary tv shows or haunted houses.   And this is why.

[nepvudum]

“ Merry Christmas, everyone! ”

“ Another Christmas Day in Planeptune has come - I hope everyone, be they in Gamindustri or beyond, has celebrated it well. I wish you lots of food, and time spent with your loved ones. ”

“ - But! If it hasn’t gone your way, don’t let it get you down! Perhaps you didn’t get the presents you wanted, or you aren’t able to see your family, or there may be tension... that’s okay! Keep a smile - it’s a wonderful time of year, and we wish you a Happy one even if it isn’t going perfectly! ”

“ Mm, keep a smile, indeed. It will be a whole year before Christmas time comes around again - make today count while you have it! Merry Christmas - and, well, if you aren’t celebrating it, we wish you a happy day all the same! ”

[noonegetsleftbehind]

17. Have you ever had a roleplay partner who helped you to improve something about your own writing quality?

Roleplay/Writing Habits - Still Accepting

//I have, yes. I'll be sappy and say that Spooper, my wife, has helped me the most. I was so blown away and impressed by her writing that I found myself trying harder and learning more to improve my own writing quality. It's been 9 years now and my writing just keeps on improving along with hers.

And in all honesty??? This entire fandom. Everyone I have come across and RP'd with on here is just incredible. There are so many talented writers in this fandom that just put so much into each reply and into their characters and I am just in total awe. It has really kicked me into gear to improve once again and evolve my writing after having been stuck in the same fandom for so long and in a terrible creative rut.

You all have helped me break that rut. You challenge me every day to write the best replies I can. To have fun. To take care of myself. To be the best version of Chris I can and just keep creating these stories and AUs. You all have been so accepting and so amazing and just yeah. You make me want to keep improving and give you my best. <3

[atiny-piratequeen]

Um yes please!!!

And yeah, I was trying to help lol but I guess it could be seen that way 🤡 I've rp'd longer than playing rpg's

I miss playing dnd and pathfinder 😭

Oh can you not make a session with friends atm? Also i took pictures bc I actually have 50 bots registered for myself alone atm so here u go you or anyone else is free to ask about them and what they do in my rps.

[brassikarts]

☣ Have you ever rp’d with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

I've RP'd with two people who gave me red flags pretty early on, whom I tried to give the benefit of the doubt to because we had mutual friends, or they were well-known and seemingly universally liked. In both cases, it was a mistake. There's no need to name names here, as neither are part of the WoW RPC much these days, but...

Look. I don't make a secret of it: I was in an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship for 6 years, from my late teens into my early 20s. I've come a long ways from that experience but still carry several scars. One of them is a tendency to gaslight myself when I get a bad feeling about a person and assume I'm being oversensitive or ridiculous. Having had that done to me, it's very easy not to trust my instincts (which are pretty good, all things considered) and honestly y'all? If someone gives you a bad or squicky feeling, it's probably for a reason.

The first person was a horrific narcissist. Every plot had to be about them or their feelings; if you disagreed with them or called them out on their behavior, they'd shut you out. They'd stop talking; they'd unfriend you and then refriend you once time had passed with an explanation about their disappointment in your behavior and a long winded exposition of their feelings. When they did it to me? I realized I felt RELIEF in the periods in which they decided to go silent, so that was a block and walk. The subsequent attempt to smear my reputation was proof enough it was a good decision.

The second was trickier. I don't think it was narcissism, but it was definitely a good part privilege and manipulation, and same deal. When they were mad at you, silent treatment; when a plot didn't go the way they wanted, abandonment no matter how many other people were enjoying themselves. Added to the constant, weird witholding and gifting of their presence and the discomfiting interpersonal sense I got from them and... yeah. That was another walk and block.

Both parties had had some problematic interactions in the RPC. Both had played them off as something akin to 'women being bitches but you're not like that, you get me'. If you get that from a partner? Go. Run. Do not engage. Your mental health and enjoyment of RP is worth so much more, y'all. Trust me on this.

Sometimes, whispers in an RPC are little more than petty anon BS but other times? They're absolutely rooted in truth. Look at the patterns - how have their other major plots gone? How much bad blood is there from former groups and RP partners? I'm not saying you need to do a background check, but keeping an eye and ear open never hurts. Just sayin', it might be illuminating.

[gooseberry-darling]

Yeah, like I've been tempted to start one myself but I've never rp'd before and would rather not look like a fool.

Eh,I think you'd do fine! I mean,you'll get the hang of it,so I support your Fem!Dark blogg before it starts!

[dreadfutures]

Okay maybe I should have clarified it up a bit

I meant like uh discord RP type of role plays with characters!

And they are all SFW

I myself am not a fan of NSFW stuff so I yeah I was wondering about that

It could be fandom related or fandomless, that is up to you

It's been 10 million years since I RP'd, so I can't really say how I feel about it now ahahaha.

[huntingbounties]

☣ Have you ever rp'd with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

I have roleplayed with people who had bad reputations here and I tried to see it for myself. Sometimes…yeah, they turned out pretty bad and I got away as soon as I could. There were some who had a good reputation but turned out to be manipulative. Then there have been some who turned out to be good. I’ve had a mixed bag, which is why I do stick to my own opinions over others. 

[shadowraiths-archived-blog]

☣ Have you ever rp'd with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

the salty af munday meme

Uhm, first off.. and this is taking a page from your answer earlier.  I think people misuse words here on tumblr and to call someone abusive is uh, interesting?  Like, it’s the internet.  You can block and move on if it really gets too bad.  So they honestly cannot abuse you unless you allow them to.  

Now, I have noticed that a lot of people here are scared to speak up unless it is behind a set of sunglasses sitting on a lil black and gray circle.  But again, if someone is really treating you badly?  Don’t go on the hidden offensive because at that point, you’re not doing anything to help yourself.  You don’t have to explain your reasons to anyone and if you do, do it “face to face.”

But Oh goodness, I digressed, didn’t I?

Anyhoo, yes..I’ve ended up RPing with some people that were known to be or said to be “toxic” (another term that has been twisted.)  And you know, I gave them all the benefit of the doubt.  Most of them turned out to be relatively normal people who just had different views than those that disliked them.  There was at least one doozy though and tbh, I never want to RP or talk to them again.  You know who they are, and you know why.  Oh wait, make that TWO PEOPLE..whatever. They aren’t in my life anymore and tbh, if I found out someone I was Rping with was them, I might have to distance myself. Yeah.  WILL distance myself.

[kaibaisms]

☠ What does someone have to do for an instant unfollow from you?☢ What fads/trends are you so over?☣ Have you ever rp'd with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?♒ Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in?✂ A fandom that you feel isn't open and accepting?

☠ What does someone have to do for an instant unfollow from you?

Blatantly copying other’s characterizations. Also being homo/trans/ace phobic/racist/sexist/etc

☢ What fads/trends are you so over?

Eh...I don’t really know of fads/trends I’m so over. I do want to bring some back (such as In character Board Game Online/Pretend Your XYZZY game nights) 

☣ Have you ever rp'd with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

I’ve been lucky as one would say that I never had an abusive partner on here. I did have some who broke my heart in the old RP group I used to be in (it was all single verse and they cheated on my character and yeah not the best)

♒ Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in?

We’re not the best/most perfect fandom but we’re pretty awesome at times. I have seen some drama come up about maybe once a month or so from people I follow but apart from that, we’re pretty great. 

✂ A fandom that you feel isn't open and accepting?

I feel at times the Broadway/Musical/Theatre fandom is not as open as it should be. In my experience with the fandom, I’ve noticed “prime RPers” who got a lot of credibility in it and would make a lot of characters but if someone like myself or if someone else make a different version of that character, they don’t get that much activity. 

It is also with the “stick with what you know/who you know” thing but it’s good to reach out to strangers because you never know who they may become after interacting with them.