#yeah he’s a boy yeah he still gonna rock that pink agenda

[pasteilian]

Trans male fem presenting Leo is my bread and butter hes a pretty bitch and he knows it’s

(There’s a few days in every month where he’s the devil but April says that’s normal)

[totallysharkycomplete]

Waiting For You Part Six (Ford Pines x Reader) Home In Your Arms

She awoke before the dawn as usual. Under the blankets was warm. Although the boat was cold Ford’s body, which was firmly pressed against hers, provided plenty of heat. The gentle swaying of the boat would have made it easy to fall back asleep, but since the weather was supposed to be clear today, she decided to get up and watch the sunrise.

Gently slipping out of the covers, and out of Ford’s grasp, she quickly dresses into more layers before quietly stalking up on the deck. She could still hear the heavy breaths and snores coming from the cabin below. The deck was even colder than the cabin, and there was a layer of frost on the upper windows. She quickly made a cup of coffee then downed it, then leaned against the front railing, and waited for the sunrise as the clouds on the horizon turned pink.

She was lost in thought, so when someone wrapped their arms around her waist she jumped. The person behind her chuckled and she let out a sigh.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Ford’s lips are right next to her ears, his stubble is scratchy on her skin.

She lets out a hum, then turns around in his arms to face him. “You could still be sleeping.”

He begins to plant gentle kisses to her cheek. “Couldn’t without you.”

She giggles and places a hand on his cheek, her thumb runs over his stubble.

“Why are you up so early?” He almost whines against her skin, still leaving soft kisses on the small amount of skin exposed on her cheeks and upper neck.

She let out a content sigh. “Weather is supposed to be clear. I wanted to watch the sunrise. Would you like to join me?”

He moves his head up and presses his forehead to hers. “I’d love to.”

She leans forward the inch she needs to so she can plant a kiss on Ford’s lips. It’s soft, but conveys so many feelings. Love, affection, the sense of being home.

Ford tries to lean forward for another kiss but she quickly turns around. He lets out an exasperated sigh.

“Sorry, but the sun rises this way.” She teases.

Ford’s hand is on the back of her neck, moving the hair away from it so he can press more kisses to her skin.

“You’re in a very touchy mood this morning.” She comments, leaning her back against his chest.

“Do you want me to stop?” He murmurs, lips still on her skin.

“No,” she quickly tells him. “Just an observation.”

He leaves a few more kisses on her skin before her hand wraps around his. “Ford, look.”

The sun had just peaked above the horizon, brilliant oranges and yellow began to fill the sky, casting warm rays of light on the small sleepy fishing village they had docked near. Soon the warm rays fell onto her face. “Isn't it beautiful?”

“Not more so than you.” Ford tightens his grip around her waist and rests his chin against the top of her head.

She’s glad Ford can’t see the blush on her face. Even after thirty plus years had passed, he could still make her blush. She was about to say something modest back to Ford until she heard a burp and scratching noises.

“Ugh, get a room.” Stanley had obviously joined them on deck.

“We have a room.” She rolls her eyes. “I think you forget we share sometimes. Your memory is slipping old man.” She teases without moving from Ford’s grip.

“Yeah, yeah.” He waves her comment away before heading inside the upper cabin to the coffee she had prepared.

There's a moment of peace, you might almost call it pure bliss. To spend the sunrise wrapped in your lover's arms, their warm breath leaving them in clouds of hot air, the boat gently rocking them as the morning tide rolled in.

“Everytime I wrap my arms around you, it feels like coming home all over again, to where I belong.” Ford whispers.

She turns to face him again and cups his face with both her hands, and kisses the tip of his nose. “When did you become so romantic?”

Ford leans into her touch. “I mean it.” He pauses for a second. “I don’t think I ever told you, but when I first came back and saw you, my first thought was that I had died and gone to heaven. Being with you again is everything I’ve ever wanted and more.”

“If you had died and gone to heaven then that would have meant Stan was in your heaven too.” She laughs.

“He’s still her now.” He grabs her hand to hold it still so he can tilt his head and kiss her thumb.

She laughs even louder this time, then wraps her arms around his neck to draw him into another kiss. “I love being in your arms. I love being your home, because you’re mine too.”

The boat rocks them gently as the morning sun warms their bodies. Their hearts are full of love for one another. “Let’s stay like this forever, and just let the world drift away.”

Ford is about the respond before Stan interrupts.

“Hey love birds! We gonna explore some anomalies today or what?” Stan barks from behind them.

Ford's eyebrows furrow and he goes to turn his head to snap at Stanley, but her hands catch his chin and turn his face back to her. She kisses him passionately three times and he’s breathless. She untangles herself from Ford and heads towards Stan.

“What’s on the agenda for today co-captain Stanley?” She smiles.

Ford is left standing there speechless and in a daze.

“Are you coming, co-captain Ford?”

Ford looks over at her. She squinting her eyes as the morning sun washes over her features, her cheeks pink from the cold. He has never been more in love with her.

“Coming, associate co-captain.”

---------- By the time the sun was high in the sky he three of them had docked the boat and climbed halfway up the mountain. The town folks had told them about strange flying creatures that lived near the top of the mountain.

The sun beat down on them, and they soon found themselves needing to take off some of the many layers of winter clothes they had dressed in for the day. About an hour into the hike Stan speaks up.

“Hey poindexter, how bout a break?” He huffs as he wipes sweat from his brow.

“We’re very close to where the creatures were reported being seen.” Ford is warm, sweat gleams on his brow, but his attitude is chipper and he’s not as nearly out of breath.

“Even the kid needs a break.” Stan motions towards her.

She rolls her eyes at Stan still calling her a kid. She’s also out of breath, almost as bad as Stan. The high altitude is getting to her, but she wouldn’t voice it.

Ford places a hand on her shoulder. “What do you think? Would you like to take a short rest.”

She smiles and nods. “Let’s take a short rest. We wouldn’t want Stan passing out on us.”

Stan grunts but doesn’t say anything. Glad to finally have a break from hiking. The three of them sit on the ground and drink their water. Ford is sitting as close as he can to her. She shivers as a cold breeze blows past them, feeling a little cold now that they have stopped moving. Ford wraps an arm around her shoulder, she looks up at him and smiles a wordless thank you.

After a few minutes they stand up and begin to get moving again. She groans as she stretches, and once they start moving again she is behind both the boys on the path.

“You alight? You’re normally faster than me.” Stan turns his head to talk to her while they move up the narrow mountain path.

“I’m fine, my legs are just a bit sore.” She tells him.

They continue their hike until they break through the tree line. They can see the horizon on the sea, and far below them is the small fishing village where they left the Stan O’ War II docked.

She’s stunned by the beautiful view and almost doesn’t realise Stan and Ford haven’t stopped walking like she had. She scurries to catch up to them, until she sees a bush near her shake. Looking over she sees a small head of a rat pop out.

“Aww.” She says softly to not scare the rodent away. “Hey little fella.” She coos.

The rat scurried back into the bush at the sound of her voice, much to her disappointment. She turns to catch up to the boys, After a few steps she hears a strange sound. Somewhere between a squeak and a squawk. Turning around she sees the rat has raised itself out of the bush with a pair of wings. This must be the creature they had been looking for!

“Fascinating!” She says to herself and pulls out her sketchbook and begins to jot down a quick doodle on the animal. The sun catches on her silvery pen and flashes a light up at the rat-like creature. It squawks loudly then dives towards her.

Further up the path Ford is mumbling to himself and Stan is tuning him out. Both of them freeze when they hear a shriek. They both stop dead in their tracks and whip around to see she is no longer behind either of them. The brothers share a second of a glance before booking it back down the trail.

It doesn’t take them long to get back to her. When she comes into sight they can see she's using one arm to shield her face, the other is holding her notebook and waving it aimlessly behind her, trying to hit the creature that’s attacking her hair.

Stan is the first to her, he pulls her to his chest with one arm and throws a left hook at the creature, sending it crashing into a tree. There's a moment of silence before Ford is pulling her into his arms. Stan makes his way over towards the tree.

“What happened? I thought you were right behind us?” Ford’s hands are on her face, tilting her head around and looking for any sign of injury. Her hands rest on his chest.

“Ford, I’m okay, promise. You were both further up the path when I noticed the creature. I thought if I called to you I’d scare it off. So I tried to get a quick sketch, and I must have scared it because it started attacking my hair.” She can’t help as a laugh escapes her.

“You could have been hurt.” Ford’s voice is soft as he scoulds her.

“But I wasn’t.” She teases.

“Please promise me you won’t go off on your own again? I don’t know what I’d do if you got hurt.” Ford told her seriously.

She stops smiling when she realises Ford is actually upset, not with her, but by the fact she could have been hurt. She takes his hands, which were still on her face, and holds them in hers. She leans up and gives him a soft, reassuring kiss.

“I promise.” She whispers.

“Check this out!” Stan shouts and holds the unconscious ratbird in between them by its feet.

She shrieks with surprise and jumps away from Ford. “Stanley that’s disgusting!”

“What!? I thought you like rodents!” He laughs, shaking the bird closer towards her as she takes another step back.

“I wouldn’t pick up a wild rat or bird with my hands, or let it that close to my face! Who knows where that thing has been!” She scolds him. “If it wakes up and bites you I’m not helping you.”

In the commotion Ford slipped on some protective gloves from his pack. “Hold it still please Stanley.” Stan complies and Ford gently stretches its wings open and begins to list off observations about it that she quickly sketches down. “It’s wingspan is too small to carry it far. That’s probably why it is native only to this island.” He lists other things off like teeth size and tail length.

Stan gently set the animal down. “Think that’s enough for today right?”

The other two agree and they begin their trek back down the mountain. She is in front of them now to set the pace, and so the boys can’t lose sight of her. When the path begins to get wider, Ford falls back a bit to walk besides Stan.

“Thank you for earlier.” Ford tells his brother.

Stan looks at him confused. “Didn’t do nothing.”

“You were able to get to her first and protect her from the rat bird.” Ford reminds him.

Stan waves it off. “Don’t mention it.” Stan wouldn’t admit to Ford how scared he was to see her get attacked like that, he’d rather not think about it.

When they make it back to the ship the sun is already touching the horizon. It was Ford’s night to cook and the other two went to rest in their beds. When the food was ready Ford headed below deck to find them both asleep. He wasn’t surprised Stan had nodded off. Almost anytime he wasn’t actively moving or engaged in an activity he would fall asleep. But his believed fiance would normally be reading a book or be annotating her notes.

He gently brushes some hair out of her face and she stirs. She smiles up at him and grabs his hand and brings it down to her lips to kiss his palm. His heart flutters at her sweet act.

“I fell asleep.” She murmurs, voice heavy with sleep.

“I noticed.” He leans down to kiss her. “Are you feeling alright?”

“I feel perfect now that you’re here.” She giggles and he frowns. She frowns too, but only to mock him. “I feel fine Stanford. I guess today was just too exciting is all.”

“Well, why don’t we have dinner then we can go right back to bed?” He suggested.

“You’re perfect. I love you” She smiles up at him, eyes half lidded.

“I love you too.”

They stare into each other's eye, and neither of them notice the loud snoring has stopped. There’s a loud groan announcing Stan has awoken.

“If you love him so much why don’t you marry him?” Stan teases, she rolls her eyes.

The next morning Ford is the first to wake up. His love is tucked close to his side, buried under the blankets. He turns on his side to draw her impossibly closer. She makes a noise at the movement but doesn't awaken.

The bed feels a little warmer than normal. Maybe the day will be warmer than the forecast had predicted Ford thinks. Ford lays there for a while, enjoying the silence and warmth for a while until she begins to stir.

He feels her stretch under his grasp and she looks up at him eyes still droopy from sleep.

“Good morning my dear. Would you like to join me for some coffee?” Ford murmurs into her hair.

She shakes her head no. “It’s too cold.” She tries to burrow closer to Ford to get any extra warmth.

“I’ll go turn the heater on upstairs, join me when you’re ready.” Ford moves the hair away from her forehead and kisses her there then freezes. He moves the back of his hand to her forehead, then his cheek to confirm his thought. “You’re burning up!”

“No, it’s cold.” She denies.

“You must have a fever. Do you feel alright? When did you start feeling sick?” Ford doesn’t bother keeping his voice down and clearly wakes up his brother.

Stan rolls his eyes at the commotion and makes his way to the upper deck.

Ford quickly stands. “I’m going to get dressed then go find a doctor in town. With a town this small there must be one to make house calls.”

“Ford, please, there’s no need for that.” She sniffs, still laying in the bed, pulling the covers closer around her.

“There really isn’t.” Stan grumbled, coming back down the stairs, a cup of water in one hand. The other was full of an assortment of pills. “Take these.” He gruffly shoved both the water and pills at her. She obeyed, sat up, and quickly tooked the unknown pills Stan had handed her. “Go back to sleep.” She layed down and closed her eyes, rolling over to face the wall away from the brothers.

“What did you give her?” Ford whispered, concerned.

Stan places a finger over his lips and motions towards the upper deck. They sit inside the cabin where Stan had turned on the space heater.

“She of course came prepared and packed herself cold medicine.” Stan slides the first aid box across the table so Ford can examine the medicine boxes of everything he had given her. “Almost every winter she gets a cold or two. Her legs start to hurt and she gets really tired. Should have seen it coming’ yesterday but was a little distracted by the birds. She must have noticed, but she never says anything. Thinks she can power through a fever.” Stan pauses a moment to laugh. “There was one time I caught her working on the portal shivering and sweating’ bucket. Practically had to drag her back to bed. The older we’ve gotten through, the less stubborn she’s gotten at admitting she’s actually sick.”

It finally dawns on Ford just how much Stanley had taken care of her while he was gone. Sure, she had told Ford directly that he had, but he thought she was just putting in a good word for her friend. Ford knows it to be true now. He remembers once in college she went to class with a fever just to be sent back to her dorm. If Stan hadn’t been here to make her rest when she was sick, she would have worked herself until she passed out or worse.

The cabin is silent for a moment.

“Thank you, Stan.”

“Don’t mention it.”

“No, Stanley, listen.” Ford looks at his brother and there are visible tears in his eyes. “She had told me before that you had taken care of her in my absence. I hadn’t thought much about it, since she's always been so strong and independent. I know she's also stubborn. If you hadn’t been there to make her rest… Thank you Stanley, truly, for taking care of her while I was gone.” Ford places his hand on his brother’s shoulder and gives it a firm squeeze. Stan returns the action, not commenting on the noticeable tears.

“She’d probably be happy to have you back downstairs to keep her warm.” Stan says, looking away from his brother. He doesn't want to see him cry, or he knows he will cry as well.

“I think you’re right.” Ford stands and goes to join her back in bed.

---------- Ford wasn’t exactly excited to go to the carnival on the boardwalk, but her and Stan conveyed it would be fun.

“It’ll be like the one back home! Remember when we tried to join the circus with our pet possum?” Stan laughed a deep belly laugh as they made their way past the ticket booth.

“You never told me you had a pet possum.” She's walking next to Ford, his hand is held tight in hers.

“But he told you about trying to join the circus?” Stan inquires.

“I’d argue he was more your pet than mine.” Ford argues.

They make their way around the attractions, eat some fair food, and play a few games. She has two stuffed animals they boys had won for her in her hands, and is filled with joy.

“You there, miss, would you like to know your future?” A voice calls to her, and she turns to see a fortune teller beckoning her towards their tent. The fortune teller's eyes are glassy and they don’t hold her gaze, they hold a long cane indicating they are blind. She feels an arm tighten around her shoulder.

“Fortune tellers aren’t to be trusted.” Ford tells her.

“It’s just for fun,” she comments. “There’s no way they could actually know my future.”

“I’ve traveled to different dimensions. I think almost anything is possible at this point.” Ford reminds her.

“I say we do it. I’d like to know when I get filthy rich.” Stan begins walking into the tent.

She tried to follow in after him but the fortune teller held up their hand. “Only one person inside the tent at a time please.”

So Ford and her wait outside the tent. It’s only a few minutes later when Stan exits with a huff. “You’re right, total scam, they don't know anything.”

The fortune teller exits the tent again and points over to her and Ford. “The six fingered one next.” Then enters the tent.

A chill runs up her spine. The teller was clearly blind, but to call Ford out like that. She shares a surprised look with Ford, who surprisingly goes into the tent after them.

Stan is clearly still mad about whatever he had been told, so she takes his hand. “I’m sure whatever they said it wasn’t true. Like you said, probably just a scam.”

Stan looks down at her warm smile and sighs. “You’re right kid. Just a scam. I should know.” They both share a laugh.

Ford exits the tent looking lost in thought.

“You’re next girly.” The teller holds open the flap for the tent and she makes her way in. The room looks bigger on the inside and there are two chairs on either side of a table with a fake looking crystal ball.

She sits and watches the fortune teller places their hands on the ball and thinks for a second before speaking. The ball lights up and smoke swirls around in it. “I would ask what you’d like to know about your future, but I already know what knowledge you seek. It weighs heavy on your heart. Knowing the truth might be even more of a burden. Would you still like to know?”

She thinks for a second. If the fortune teller was being honest and knew what she wanted to know, what she always thinks about, then she wants to know. “Will Ford and Stan die before me? I don’t think I could lose Ford again, and well, Stan is my best friend.”

The teller nods their head and hums. “As I suspected. Losing the ones you love is a heavy buren. Unfortunately you must bear the burden again, fortunately you only must bear it once.”

“Who?” Her voice quivers.

“As I said, losing someone you love is difficult, as you know. He cannot see his brother lost again. He will go first. You will be needed to comfort the six fingered one. This universe isn’t always fair, but it seems it will go easy on you, and you will not have to lose him again.” They remove their hand from the ball and the lights and smoke fade. “Now you know, you must live with this knowledge the rest of your life.”

She looks down at her hands and nods, then stands to exit the tent. She finds her boys standing exactly where she left them. Still looking lost in thought and a little angry. She pulls Ford into a hug and draws him from his thoughts.

“What did they tell you?” Ford asks, returning the hug.

She rests her chin on his chest to look up at him with a small smile. “That I’ll get to spend the rest of my life with you, and that’s all I want.”

“They really tell you that?” Stan grunts, clearly not happy with what he was told.

“No,” she confesses. “But they didn’t have to say that for me to know it, and-” She turns to look back at the tent and sees it's gone. She turns quickly to confirm what she sees if real. Then turns back to the twins, whose jaws are dropped.

The three share a look then agree to head back to the ship for the night.

Stan tosses and turns that night. He can’t seem to sleep. What the fortune teller had told his replays in the back of his mind and he’s still pissed about it. He throws off the sheets and puts on his coats and boots and heads to the upper deck. To his surprise, he wasn’t alone.

“Why are you up so late kid?” Stan slumps down onto the bench by her.

“I imagine for the same reason you can’t sleep.” She leans her head against her friend with her sigh.

There's a moment of silence between them. The only sound is the waves gently crashing on the nearby shore and the soft groan of the boat as it moves gently with the sea.

“What did they tell you?” They ask in unison. They both breath out a laugh.

“You first.” She says.

He thinks for a moment. “They told me I’m going to die before you and Ford. Ford, I get, he’s healthy and in shape.” She elbows him. “Not implying you ain’t! It’s just, I didn’t want to die before you is all. I’ve caused you enough suffering.”

She places her hand on his shoulder. “Stanley, don’t think like that. You haven’t caused me any suffering. You’re my best friend.”

He runs his hands down his face. “It’s my fault Ford got lost in the portal for thirty years, it’s my fault you didn’t get to start a family with him like you had planned to. It’s my fault you didn’t get to get married yet. It’s my fault that-”

“Stanley!” She shouts sternly at him and he turns to face her, surprised by the authority in her voice. She takes his hand in hers. “Stan you can’t think like that. You know I’ve forgiven you a long time ago with what happened with Ford. The rest of it… It doesn’t matter, because if it weren’t for you I wouldn’t have him back. If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t have met the most amazing great niece and nephew ever. If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t be sailing the seas right now with the two people I care the most about in the world, discovering amazing anomalies like I’ve always wanted to.”

Stan’s face is turned from hers but he gives her hand that’s holding his a tight squeeze. There's another moment of silence. “What did they tell you?” His voice croaks, she wouldn’t mention how he reached his free hand up to wipe his tears.

“They told me about the same.” She confesses. “That you’ll die before me, but I’ll be here for Ford.”

Stan Turns back to look at her. “Do you…” Stan doesn’t really want to finish the thought. He doesn’t want to think about their mortality.

“I’ll go before Ford. They said it was the universe going easy on me.” She smiles up at Stan, but the smile doesn't reach her eyes.

He pulls her into a tight hug. “Should we tell Ford?” She sniffs as tears sting her eyes.

“No. He wouldn’t want to know.”

----------- “Do you hear that?” Stan asks.

Ford and her are both sitting at the table noses in a book in the upper cabin of the ship. She and Ford listen, share a glance with each other, then look back at Stan.

“No,” they chime in unison.

Stan is driving the boat towards their next destination where there had been reports of strange ocean tides. He smacks his ear with the hearing aid.

“I must be picking up radio waves again.” He grumbles.

An hour later the two bookworms are asleep as Stan still mans the wheel, this time he hears the sound again. His head feels hazy and his body feels warm. He turns the boat towards the sound and begins to follow it.

Ford and her are jostled awake as the ship hits a large wave. They’re both lifted for a second from their seats before landing back down with a thump.

“Stanley what the hell is happening?” Ford is the first to notice the situation. The weather around them is awful. Rain pounds onto the ship, the boat jumps as it passes over enormous waves, going faster than she's ever seen it go. Lighting and thunder crash outside. Stan should have seen the storm coming.

Speaking of Stan. He’s standing at the wheel of the ship, eyes glued forwards, he doesn’t even notice Ford yelling at him. Ford pushes Stan out of the way and he falls to the floor. Suddenly Stan sits up and looks around.

“Where the hell are we?” He asks, hand held to his head.

“We should be asking you that, seeing as you were the one driving the last two hours!” She barks before reaching under the chairs for their life vests. She tosses the boys theirs and secures her own, they quickly buckle theirs as well.

“I don’t, I don’t know what happened.” Stan looks lost for a second. “I can’t remember.”

Her heart hurts for her friend. She knows that must be scary for him but now isn’t the time for comfort. Ford begins to bark orders, she helps Stan to his feet.

They begin securing lines and sails, making sure all objects are secured down so they won’t cause the three of them harm.

Suddenly she hears a noise and freezes. Her head feels hazy and her body feels warm. It seems as if her body is moving on it’s own as she begins to walk towards the door and exits the cabin. A strong hand grabs her arm.

“What are you doing?” Ford screams over the rain. Stan had taken the wheel again.

Her eyes are glazed over and she tries to continue walking towards the railing. Ford begins to drag her back inside but she resits. She freezes and he stops trying to pull her. She turns and points.

“There.”

Ford turns to see what she’s pointing at, and it’s the largest wave he’s seen in his whole life. He quickly wraps his body around her and tries to make it back into the cabin before the wave hits, but he’s not quick enough. The water envelops their bodies and they are thrown against the railing. The ship pops back up over the waves again and Ford looks into her eyes.

She's over the railing, dangling off the ship, her only tether is Ford’s hand.

“Don’t let go! I’ve got you!” He shouts desperately holding onto her and the ship.

Her body is like a rag doll as it’s slammed into the ship with the waves. She looks back up at Ford, eyes still glazed, and lets go of his hand, falling into the inky water below.

The second her body pops back up from water her head clears. Her life jacket inflated when she hit the water. The last thing she remembers was she was on the ship with the boys. A wave overtook her and she pushed back under the water. When she comes back up she realises she hears Ford screaming.

It’s dark and all Ford can see is the automatic light on her life vest getting further and further from them. He’s screaming for her, and for Stan to move the boat in her direction.

She tries to scream for him but is pushed under water again. When her head resurfaces she struggles for a breath before the same thing happens again. Coming back up this time she sees the ship be covered by a wave, then herself. This time when she comes back up she sees the light of the ship are gone. She feels something grab her foot, and is dragged under the water.

Ford feels warmth all around him. His eyes fluttered open and he squints as rays of sun blind his eyes. Waves softly lap and his boots and he quickly sit up as the events that just unfolded flood his mind. He looks around quickly hoping to see his love, or his brother.

Stan isn’t far from him and Ford hops to his feet to run from him. He falls to his knees and sees he’s breathing, Ford begins to shake his brother. “Stanley! Are you alright?”

Stan’s hand comes up to swat his brother away. “Five more minutes.” He mumbles.

Ford doesn't hesitate to slap him across the cheek.

Stan is quick to sit up. “What the hell was that for?”

“Do you not remember what just happened?” Ford barks.

Stan’s eyes grow wide in horror. “She went overboard… Didn’t she?”

Ford slumps forward and his hands cover his face. “I had her, she was in my hands and she… She let go.”

“She let go?” Stan echos in confusion.

“She had the same look in her eyes that you did when we found you steering the ship into the storm.” Ford breathing is quick and ragged, the panic of what’s happened starts to over take him. “I… Oh god, I-,”

“Shut your yap,” Stan commands. “You hear that?”

At first all Ford can hear is the gentle crashing of the waves onto the shore, then he hears it. The distant call of a voice. A very familiar feminine voice.

Ford’s eyes frantically scan the beach both ways looking for the source when he sees her. She must have spotted him at the same time because she begins to sprint towards him. Ford is quick to his feet and meets her halfway. Ford pulls her into a crushingly tight hug as tears fill both of their eyes.

“I thought I had lost you.” He cries into her hair. “I don’t know what I would do if I had.”

“I’m okay. I’m okay.” She sobs. “We’re safe now.” She whimpers against his chest.”

They stay there in each other’s embrace, until Stan slowly walks over to them.

“Glad you’re alright kid.” Stan smiles.

She grabs Stan and pulls him into the hug. He grumbles something but hugs both of them. After a moment they pull back. Ford’s hands are still clutching the back of her wet, sandy shirt. Ford and her look at each other and share a breathy laugh, and begin to wipe the tears away from their eyes.

“Now that we’ve had that lovely reunion, where are we and where’s the ship?” Stan frowns.

“Destroyed, I'd imagine.” Ford clears his throat.

“Actually…” She takes Ford’s hand and begins to lead them down the beach the way she had come. “When I had gone overboard, my mind cleared when I hit the water. I saw the ship get taken over by a wave and thought the worst. Something grabbed my foot and dragged me under, but…”

They round the corner on the beach and see Stan O’ War II, unharmed, anchored off shore. Ford and Stan both notice some splashing around the ship that wasn’t like normal waves. The brothers share a look.

“How is it not damaged?” Ford is in awe of the vessel's perfect condition.

“Turns out, we’ve had a guardian angel this whole trip we didn’t know about.” She smiles.

“Who?” Stan asks.

“Mable.” She laughs as theirs another splash in the water, this time closer to the shore.

The brothers both see the end of a tail then a few seconds later, a head pops up.

“Ford, you might remember what Mable had written in the journal about meeting her friend, Mermando. Turns out she still writes to him and told him about our trip and asked him and his people to look out for us.” She waves over at the head that had popped up signaling to him it was safe.

“It’s the least I can do to repay my friend. If it wasn’t for her then I might still be trapped in Gravity Falls.” Mermando smiles. He had swum over to them as far as he could without leaving the water.

“A real mermaid, huh?” Stan grunts.

“Fascinating.” Ford muses.

“He and a few others were able to pull us to safety after we were lured into the storm.” She tells them.

“Lured?” Ford repeats.

“Yes, unfortunately two of you had been affected by a siren’s song. They’re like merpeople, only they crave violence.” Mermando shakes his head.

“We really can’t thank you enough.” She sighs, giving Ford’s hand a squeeze. “And please, don’t mention this to Mable. I wouldn't want her to worry.”

“She will hear nothing of it. You have my word. Farwell Pines!” And with that, Mermando splashes under the water and is gone.

“Darn it, I should have asked him some questions while I had him here.” Ford brings a hand to his mouth in thought.

She playfully shoves him. “I say we should be happy that we’re alive.”

“You know what I say?” Stan asks and begins stripping his clothes. “I say we have a beach day! Been forever since we were in a warmer climate like this!” He splashes into the water in just his underwear, leaving the other two behind.

“What do you say, my love?” Ford pulls her to his chest.

She wraps her arms around his neck. “Having a nice calm day after almost drowning to death? I think we deserve it.” She plants a soft kiss to his lips before pulling away and begins striping down to her underwear. “Race you to the water.”

Ford doesn’t have to be asked twice before he follows suit removing his clothes.

After hours of relaxing on the beach and playing in the water like children, the sun had begun to set. Stan had made his way back to the boat leaving only her and Ford on the beach.

Ford is laying on his back, her head rests against his shoulder. His arms are tightly wrapped around her. Her fingers absentmindedly trace the knit pattern on his sweater.

“I can’t believe out of anywhere I could be in the world right now, I’m here with you.” She whispers.

He hums and she can feel his chest vibrate under her cheek. She turns her head to look at him. His eyes are closed but there's a smile on his face.

“Are you asleep?” She giggles.

He hummed a sound to tell her no.

She breathes out a laugh and sits up. “Let’s head back before the sun sets all the way.”

He opens his eyes half lidded and smiles at her. She takes his hand and helps him sit up. His hands move to her face to draw her in for a kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

---------- “Alright, there. I think that will work.” She places the tablet down on the table she and her boys are sat at.

“Are you sure you set it up right?” Ford asks.

She rolls her eyes. “I helped build an interdimensional portal. I think I can figure it out.”

“I just wanted to make sure. You remember what happened when you tried to set up our vhs to record Saturday Night Dead.” Ford reminds her.

“That was one time! It’s not my fault the vhs caught fire!” She huffs.

“Can you two stop arguing like an old married for a couple?” Stan groans.

Ford and her share a look and smile. Their attention is pulled away from each other when the tablet begins to make noise.

“Oh, it’s ringing!” She leans forward and presses the green answer button. “Hello? Kids, can you hear us?”

She's greeted with the sound of laughter. “You’re too close to the camera. Move back a little.” She moves back and the screen reveals Dipper and Mable.

“I told you I set it up just fine!” She pats Ford’s chest.

“Kids! It’s good to see you!” Stan greets.

“You guys look so cute in all your boat gear!” Mable squeals.

“Yeah you guys look really cool!” Dipper confirms.

“How has school been going!” Ford asks.

“Great! I got accepted into some senior level classes for next semester.” Dipper cheers.

Mable pushes dipper aside to hog the camera. “And I got a boyfriend!”

Dipper shoves Mabel back to get back in frame. “Yeah, and he’s actually not awful and kinda normal?”

“Congratulations to you both.” She smiles and leans her head against Ford’s shoulder.

They continue to talk and catch up for almost an hour.

“So we can come back to Gravity Falls next summer for sure?” Dipper inquires.

“Absolutely! I've been in contact with Fiddleford and he said we are more than welcome to stay with him in the old Northwest manor.” Ford confirms.

“Soos also said you’re welcome to sleep over at the shack whenever you want.” Stan chimes in.

“I can’t wait to see you two again! You’re really the best great niece and nephew ever.” She comments.

“You’re the best graunt ever!” Dipper and Mabel speak in unison, then begin to giggle and shove each other.

“See you two in a few months!” With that they end the call.

“A month and four weeks, four days, and six hours.” Ford says precisely.

“But who's counting?” She teases.

“And only a month, fours weeks, two days, and four hours until you become my wife.” Ford pulls her close, Stan rolls his eyes and leaves the upper cabin.

“Now that I am counting down to.” She plants a kiss to his cheek. “Mrs.Pines, I love how that sounds.”

“Well then, Mrs. Pines?” He kisses her forehead, then her cheek, then her lips. “Will you do the honor of being mine?”

“I already agreed to marry you, that’s why we’re getting married.” She laughs.

“I know, but I love hearing you say it. I still can’t believe you agreed to marry me.” He jokes. “Will you say it? Say you’ll be mine? Forever and always?”

Her finger came up to trace his jawline and lead his lips to hers. “Forever and always.”

[kuroosdumbslut]

Relationship HCs for more BNHA Bois

Sero:

yall hve late night talks where you lay in bed and just quietly talk about your day or anything really

usually you both end up falling asleep facing each other and by morning, sero’s on his back while youre snuggled into his side, an arm thrown over his stomach with one of his arms thrown over your waist

its a game of rock paper scissors to see who will make breakfast (funfact, sero intentionally loses so he can be sweet and bring you breakfast🥺)

GAMING NIGHTS where you got the console all set up with snacks and drinks and maybe a pizza on the kitchen counter

for the single player games or when you dont really wanna play and just watch, you get to sit in his lap while he games

OH MY GOD IF HES ON CALL WITH THE BAKUSQUAD: seros chatting with the squad while youre watching him play, silently munching on some snacks, when sero says “hold on guys i gotta pause real quick” and then he asks you, whichout putting himself on mute, if he could get up to go to the bathroom. you say “of course” and move off his lap, only to heal Kaminari scream into his mic about how he wants a cute partner to game with while bakugous cussing his out telling him to shut up lmao

late night trips to the store when you both cant sleep

youre walking up and down the aisles with sero, stopping to look through the snacks and drinks section. while youve semi zoned out, he comes up behind you and holds you. you stay like that a moment before you both pick your snacks and maybe some other small things that you need to get anyways and go home

hes a very cuddly boy and he isnt afraid to lightly tease you a bit

i know this isnt original, but hes a dork and 1000% will want to recreate the spiderman kiss: hes taped upside down from the ceiling, dangling in front of you and you smile, coming up closer to him and pressing your lips to his. when you both pull back, hes red in the face, both from being upside down and from the kiss, and youre cheeks are a little pink, but you both have huge smiles on your faces.

bakusquad meets you pretty early on id say and immediately, they all were like: “sero i swear if you hurt them-” so needless to say you are now apart of the Squad™️ and they would all kill for you

when yall invite a couple or all of the squad over, the nights always end in hysterics: kaminari probably short circuited at one point, baku is being baku, kirishimas calming him down while having a laughing fit

its chaos but its so much fun

some days when sero comes home from work as a pro hero, hes exhausted and kind of down: when the door to your shared home shut, you were up and going to greet your man, but stopped short seeing him look so...frustrated and upset. you offered a silent invitation for a hug, to which he accepted, and while hugging, you pressed dozens of little kisses all over his face and once you finally settled your lips to his, he had a small smile on his lips

he probably proposes to you in a really sweet location, like at one of your very first date spots or at a date where you both still talk about how amazing that date was.

Kirishima:

will introduce you to the squad immediately lmao

hes super sweet, he will get up early (hes used to it from baku dragging him out of bed to train) and make you breakfast, meal preps a lunch for the both of you, and starts to plan dinner when you get up from the lack of warmth he provides

hypes you tf up any time you try on new outfits, are trying to get some tedious project done, or if youre just feeling down

takes you on super fun and cute dates like: one of your first dates was going to the roller rink, and oh my god it was so fun! yall would win little tickets when they had games and if you needed a break from skating, you roll off with him to the snack bar area. you both got a thing of nachos and icees. you sat at one of the many tables and proceeded to eat, chatting and laughing over anything and everything. its still one of your favorite date memories

he games as well with the squad and he also lets you sit on his lap, but the difference is, he announces that youve made his lap your seat and for the squad to be “on their best behavior” to which bakugou immediately told him to stfu lmao

youve fallen asleep on him while he was gaming and when he notices that, he will quietly say that he has to get off and says good night to the squad. he will carry you into your shared bedroom and get you comfy in bed before going off to get dressed for bed himself. hes probably brushing his teeth when he feels you wrap your arms around his waist and bury your head in his back

hes so fucking weak for you 🥺

early morning yall have these little talks (if you arent too exhausted): the sun shines through the curtains and onto your faces, waking you both. “morning baby” kirishima says. you smile and give him a little peck. for a loment, you both stay silent, just gently caressing and cuddling each other before one of you starts the sleepy conversation of whats on the agenda for the day. as you both chat, the sleep slowly ebbing away, you lean in and give him a proper good morning kiss, laughing when he returned the affection by pressing hilariously sloppy kisses to your face and neck

there are times where his job really has him down. one of the sadder times he cane home was when he had lost a member of his team. he demanded his whole agency to take at least a week off to grieve and do what they have to. that day, he came in quiet as a mouse and the moment you saw him, you knew it wasnt a good day. as soon as you hugged him close, he started sobbing. yeah, hes a pro hero and yeah he has to deal with death a lot, but that doesnt make it easier to deal with. youre glad he took a week off and you all spent that week relaxing and, for him especially, just letting whatever emotion come over you happen.

after one of those tough days at work, he had come home both incredibly stressed out and grateful. on a mission, he had to call in backup from Bakugous agency and nearly escaped from, maybe not death, but a blow that could have landed him in the hospital for a pretty long time. he came home, minor cuts and brusies all over him, and while you were fretting over him and cleaning all the wounds, he proposed in near hysterics. he had genuinely feared for his life and if he was going to keep this job up, he wanted you as his forever partner

Shinsou:

at any given time when you both have freetime, youre cuddling

one of you is making dinner? the other is behind them hugging and holding each other

bedtime? you fall asleep entangled

i feel like he would work for Aizawa for a while before he gets the urge to start his own agency, and when he does make his own agency, you help him celebrate it by getting his a kitten. he came home and one of the first things that greets him is this little tabby puffball waddling towards him. he’d look up at you and you smile. “congratulations on the new agency baby, and on the newest member of our little family”

he looked like he was gonna cry 🥺 hes so soft for you, he loves you so much

will invite both friends and mr.aizawa (and his fam) over for the mini celebration you put together. youre just so proud of him yknow?

date nights every saturday. if one if you gets called in to work, you push the time for your date back, only rescheduling if one of you got injured and had to go to the hospital or if it was a longer call

he proposes to you in a very relaxed and sweet manner: so yall are home and its one of those rare times where you both have the next week off together. he wakes up first and just looks at you while you snooze a little longer, and all he can think about is how absolutely adorable you are. the kitten is curled up at the foot of the bed, the sun is just atarting to come in, and when the sun illuminates you, he swears you are a real angel thats blessed him. when you wake up, the first thing you see if him looking at you like you’re the most beautiful person in the world. when you gave him a soft morning kiss, he finally snapped out of his trance and pulled you closer to him, pressing small kisses to your head before breathing out, in his sleep ridden voice, asking you to marry him.

the rest of that week was spent telling friends and family that you got engaged. he tells aizawa he got engaged and not 10 minutes later, a knock from your front door is heard. aizawa congratulates the both of you and hands the both of you a basket with wine and expensive looking chocolates. while aizawa didnt stay long, you could tell he was both happy and proud of and for the both of you 😭❤️

[hazkiwislutt]

chapter four: performances, running through the dead of night, and more cuddles

{ hey friends!! it’s athena. i’m sorry i didn’t post last week, but i was just so slammed that it completely slipped my mind. i hope you enjoy this chapter, the plot is going to pick up a little after this, and i’m sorry if it seems a little slow but i promise there’s gonna be all sorts of angst and drama and secrets and all SORTS of crazy stuff that’s gonna give you all the feels. thank u for reading, i loaf u }

“What if they don’t like the way I sing it live?”

Y/N paced back and forth vigorously in her dressing room, hands fidgeting wildly as she pulled her lips between her teeth harshly. She was set to perform her single from the previous month on The Late Late Show, and while she’d performed a good handful of shows and completed her own small tour, she had never performed knowing Harry was there, and Harry was watching.  

“Well then,” Harry mused, “I think their ears might not be fully functioning, right, love?” She tutted at him, shooting him a small smile as she glanced back at him sitting on the couch, legs spread carelessly and floppy hair pushed back by a pair of sunglasses. He was wearing light wash jeans and black vans, with a white t-shirt under an open floral button up.

“I’m serious, Harry,” she whined, fiddling her fingers aggressively as she stopped her pacing in front of the mirror vanity in the room, staring herself down worriedly. She leaned against it with both of her hands, hanging her head down defeatedly and sighing as she closed her eyes.

“M’serious, too, baby,” he replied, low voice right next to Y/N’s ear. She startled a bit as she felt his arms encircle her waist, but she opened her eyes and straightened up so she could lean back into him, reveling in his comfort. “Yeh so bloody talented, an’ yeh song is amazing. No matter wha’ happens out there, yeh know m’always going to be rooting for yeh.”

Y/N sighed once more, leaning back against Harry’s broad chest and lolling her head back to look up at him. He looked down at her adoringly before ducking his head down to brush his nose against hers, which turned into him pressing his lips softly to her mouth. Y/N slackened in his grip, pulling away with a big grin as she giddily smiled at him, reaching up to steady herself by grabbing his arm.

“Better stop that,” she warned, “Otherwise we’re not going to be leaving this room for awhile.” Harry smiled at her, rubbing his nose against hers again.

“Would tha’ really be a bad thing?” He tried to chase her lips with his as she pulled away from him, holding him at arm’s length so she could look at him in the eyes. His dimple was prominent as he sulked for her kisses.

“After the performance, how about?” She reasoned with him, to which he responded with a dramatic groan, flopping his hand to his forehead and throwing his head back.

“Be a big boy and wait,” she scolded, poking his arm with her finger, to which he grabbed and brought up to his mouth, pressing a kiss to it.

“Can’t,” he pouted, “Not when yeh look so fuckin’ gorgeous. Who gave yeh the right?” She rolled her eyes, but she could feel her face heat up a bit at his accolades. Y/N’s song, Flower, was incredibly raunchy and charged, but her outfit was a different story. She thought it added to the dynamic of it.  

She was wearing a baby pink long sleeve that was tied in the middle at the bottom and was unbuttoned a fair amount, showing off quite a bit of what Harry was going to indulge himself in later. She wore a black skirt that stopped a little above her mid-thigh, and the look was completed with fishnet tights and clunky combat boots that looked as if they were made for stomping.

“Look so fuckin’ hot, baby,” Harry breathed, advancing one step so she was pressed up between the vanity and his body. Her breath caught in her throat as she felt Harry’s hands sear her neck as he situated them there to make her look up at him, only to make their way down toward her thighs. His gaze was almost too intense for her, but she stared unblinkingly back at him. He began to lower his mouth down to hers once more.

“Y/N!” A loud knock on her dressing room made Harry jump nearly nine feet in the air as he quickly broke apart from her and scurried into the dressing room closet. It was Celeste, probably giving Y/N a time update on her performance. Although Y/N and Harry had been inseparable since their first date, the only people who really knew were Andrew, Hannah, and Niall. They wanted to keep it that way, so that what they were trying to do together wouldn’t be ruined by anyone before it was even started.

“Yes?” Y/N called back weakly, leaning back against the vanity in slight irritation and a good amount of worry.

“You’re on in five! Get out here, what’s taking so long?” Celeste pounded on the door once more before her footsteps trailed off down the hall. The dressing room closet creaked open slowly, revealing a very sheepish Harry. Y/N glanced at the clock above the dressing room door which revealed that she was, in fact, set to perform in five.

“Duty calls, bub,” Y/N said, opening her arms to him, “Gimme a good luck kiss. I’m going to need it.” He chuckled, walking toward her and enveloping her in his arms, swaying her back and forth lightly before pulling away and pressing his lips to hers fiercely.

“Yeh don’t need it, love, I promise yeh. I’ll be watching from in here, but m’going to have to leave as soon as yeh done so no one sees me. I’ll see yeh back at mine, right?”

Y/N nodded, smoothing out her skirt and adjusting her blouse, which caused Harry’s eyes to dart downward and darken. She tutted and put a finger under his chin, causing him to look back up at her.

“Uh, uh, Mister. Eyes up here.” Harry giggled before kissing her once more, pulling away and prodding her toward the door with a light spank. She gasped, turning around and holding her bum.

“No time to chastise me,” he wheeled, “Go put on a show, love o’mine!”

...

Harry was in pain. Anyone would be, too, he thought, if they saw the way Y/N performed, especially the way she did tonight. He had sat in anticipation on the dressing room couch, biting the inside of his cheek excitedly as his knee jittered and he watched the show from the TV in the dressing room, James’ voice cheerfully announcing his girl.

The stage was completely dark as the soft guitar solo’s vibrato began and ended, and suddenly, Y/N stepped out of the shadows into the singular spotlight where the mic was positioned, grabbing quickly and clutching it to her body as she let out a lewd moan and breathy “yes” before sliding down the mic with her knees slightly parted while the rocking beat of the song came in.

Harry’s eyes bugged out of his head as he felt his breath leave him; he hadn’t watched any rehearsals, and he knew Flower was raunchy in nature, but he didn’t expect a performance so bold right off the bat.

Harry growled as he watched Y/N lick her teeth seductively before pressing her lips to the mic and beginning to belt out the words to the song that inspired their second night together. His jeans were too tight, and his body began to warm up as he watched Y/N strut, and dance, and sway deliciously.

A few times, she looked directly at the camera that catered to the view Harry saw on the dressing room TV, smirking and tossing her hair as if she just knew how much pain Harry was in waiting for her performance to be done.

Well, Harry thought, as his forehead began to bead with sweat and his lips began to sting from biting them so ferociously, she was going to know pain when he was done with her, too.

…

“Harry!” Y/N gasped in surprise as she was pinned up against the door of the dressing room by his body, hot and desperate. She’d walked down the hall, buzzing from the performance she’d just given. Harry had told her he was going to leave and meet her back at his home, but she was pleasantly surprised to see he was still there, even if he was gently rutting against her as he praised her performance.

“Thought you were going to go home, babe,” she asked, squeaking as he rolled his hips into hers harshly.

“Couldn’t.. I couldn’t...God, who taught yeh to be such a fuckin’ tease,” he whimpered, burying his face in her neck as he moved himself against her body. He was breathing hard, and Y/N was rendered speechless, because she’d never seen anyone so desperate for anything, ever.

“F-fuck, gonna,” he swore, swallowing harshly, “M’gonna cum in my pants like m’fuckin’ seventeen again, what’re yeh doing t’me, love, I-”

“Hey,” Y/N soothed, placing her hands on his heaving shoulders, causing him to pull back and look at her, eyes wild and lips bitten red, hair tousled and shirt crinkled, “Baby, calm down, come on. Come back to me, that’s it.” She gently ran her fingers along his cheeks as he closed his eyes and breathed her in deeply, relaxing a bit.

“M’sorry,” he apologized lowly, eyes fluttering open,”Yeh just looked so good out there, in front of all those people. The world was watching yeh, an’ just knowing tha’ m’the only one who gets yeh at the end of the day, knowing tha’ yeh mine, m’girl…” Harry trailed off, peering at her worriedly, because ever since that night they’d run into Daniel, they hadn’t talked about their relationship much. Pet names and cuddles were always a part of the agenda, but there was no substantial talk of how either of them were progressing in their emotions, and Harry hadn’t wanted to scare her.

Before he could apologize again, Y/N kissed him softly, laughing against his lips before whispering, “I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I really like the sound of me being your girl.” Harry’s eyes lit up and his lips parted in a brilliant smile, giggles bubbling from inside him out into the air.

“Yeah? Yeh wanna be m’girl?” He nuzzled his nose against hers, grinning when she scrunched her nose cutely and said his name.

“I’ve always been your girl, Harry.”

They stood together for what seemed like ages, even if it was only mere seconds, before Harry piped up questioningly, “S’this mean we’re… tha’ we can be serious?”

Y/N shifted from foot to foot before humming in affirmation, carding her fingers through his hair. “Would it be okay if we kept us a secret, still?”

Harry smiled in relief as he pressed his lips to her forehead. In all his life, privacy was a point of contention between anyone he had ever dated or wanted to date. They just didn’t get it. They wanted to be public with him, but that wasn’t something he was willing to risk, so it would never work out. He should have known (and he was endlessly thankful) that Y/N would be different, and would be on the same page as him.

“F’course, love. Anythin’ for m’girl.” He smiled as he said it, and he could physically feel her swoon. Another loud knock interrupted the moment once more, and Harry practically flew into the dressing room closet, shutting it softly. Y/N was stunned; she’d never seen anyone move so quickly or silently in her life. It was funny.

“Y/N? There’s complications with the car. Brian can’t get through the fans that are crowding the street. It’ll be awhile until we can get you out of here safely.” It was Celeste, once again.

Harry opened the closet door, waving wildly at Y/N, mouthing “me, me, me” over and over again, as if she didn’t already get the message.

“Celeste,” Y/N called, “Tell Brian he can turn around. I’ll find my own way home.”

“What? Are you sure? Y/N-”

“I’m sure, Celeste. Please, don’t worry about me.”

…

“When you waved at me from the closet, I thought you meant we were going to take your car, go back to your place, maybe watch a movie and cuddle… I didn’t know we were going to run through the back alleys and hide every time we see a car light, like rats.”

Y/N was huffing, her performance outfit had been exchanged for a pair of jeans and a t-shirt with some Vans. The summer wind was slowly changing into a fall breeze as the season prepared to shift. Harry was dragging her through the back alleyways of downtown LA. He had driven them in an incognito car to Downtown LA, only to park in a nondescript lot before pulling her out and taking off.

“M’hungry, love, an’ there’s only one place open right now tha’ I trust we could get a burger without being swarmed. We can watch a movie and cuddle after. M’not letting yeh out of m’sight.” He looked back at her, flashing her a bright smile, before repeating a little quieter, “M’not lettin’ my girl out of my sight.”

He tugged her down one more alleyway, where she squawked as she splashed into a random puddle, only to come out on a sidestreet that was dimly lit by two streetlights. A dilapidated burger joint had a flickering sign above the entrance, and Harry hurried them in.

“Laura,” he called, as soon as they burst in through the creaky door, “M’so hungry tha’ my stomach’s about to eat itself. Yeh got enough time left fo’ two more orders?”

Y/N peered around at the small shack, with two or three booths complete with cracked seats and a jukebox at each. The ordering counter was in front of a long grill and an ingredient and condiment bar, with rusty barstools situated at the counter. Harry led Y/N over and prompted her to sit. There was no one at the counter, until the backroom doors swung open and a middle-aged woman waltzed through, smiling warmly. She had medium-length, mouse brown hair that was pinned back sloppily in a black clips, and she wore jeans with a red t-shirt sporting the logo of what seemed to be a daycare.

“No, Harry,” she said airily as she fired up the grill, “I’m about to kick you out.”

Harry laughed, before pulling Y/N out from behind him. “Laura, this is-”

“The girl you keep talking about? Finally. I was wondering if I was ever going to meet her.”

Y/N looked quizzically at Harry, who bashfully looked at his feet.

“This one talks about you loads. He’s not normally here when he’s off other places, but when he’s in LA, he always makes sure to stop by a few times. I didn’t know he could actually talk that much. His mouth is normally used for eating my food, and belting out his lyrics. It was a little unnerving to hear him actually use it to talk, and even more unnerving was the fact it was about someone special.” Laura had put two burger patties on the grill, talking over the sizzle of the meat. She turned around while they cooked, leaning against the counter with her forearms and smiling at Y/N.

“I’m Y/N,” she said, offering her hand out timidly. Laura shook it, still smiling, and turned back to the grill to flip the burgers.

“I, uh,” Harry began, “I was at a party when I was like, eighteen, maybe? The boys and I had time off, an’  I’d gone to a party in Downtown, but I had an anxiety attack and jus’ ran. Ended up here, an’ met Laura. S’been like, one of my LA moms ever since. The route we ran together was the same route I’d taken to get here. Jus’ wanted to show yeh.” Y/N reached for Harry’s hand, squeezing it lightly and smiling softly at him. She mouthed “thank you” to him, before leaning in and kissing him on the cheek. She wasn’t scared to; it seemed that Harry trusted Laura enough to bring her here and talk about her, so she figured they were in the clear to act like a couple.

“Poor thing was shivering and sweating, so I offered him a burger and he scarfed it down. I was pregnant with my first kid then, and the father had just run out on me earlier that night. Harry was a godsend, he just sat and talked to me. He’s about fifteen years younger than me, but it felt like he was light years older.” Laura served them their burgers, complete with fries that looked so good Y/N swore she saw a piece of heaven. “Milkshakes, anyone?”

“Mmmph mm mmnnp!” Harry choked out through a stuffed mouth, to which Laura rolled her eyes and handed him a napkin.

“Um… what did he even say?” Y/N laughed, chomping down on a few fries as she watched Harry struggle to swallow down his mouthful.

“Cookies and Creme, dear,” Laura replied, already turning to scoop ice cream for Harry’s drink.

“I’ll take one too, please,” Y/N decided, before sliding her eyes to Harry, who was shoveling food into his mouth as if he wasn’t going to have another chance. She was so… she had fallen so hard for him in such a short amount of time, and everyday she found out more about him that captivated her entire heart. He was so kind, and interesting, and sweet, and she couldn’t believe he was a real person. She couldn’t believe he was her person.

She couldn’t imagine a life without Harry anymore, and she hoped with all her heart she wouldn’t have to experience one.

“Yeh staring, love. S’not nice.” Harry had finally pushed down his burger and was working on his fries. He cocked an eyebrow at her as he tossed a fry into his maw.

“Is it a crime to stare at my boyfriend?”

“Well, when yeh put it like tha’, s’not bad at all.”

��

“Harry, I really, really like you.”

Y/N’s voice was muffled where she pressed her lips against Harry’s bare shoulder. They’d made it up the stairs into his bedroom, only for him to toss her on the bed and ravage her the way he’d wanted to after her performance. They were tangled up in the sheets, pressed together skin to skin, breathing in the beauty of being with each other.

“Yeh like an old man like me?” Harry was joking, but there was a bit of truth to his question. He was eight years older than her. He didn’t see it as a perpetual problem, but it did cross his mind every once in awhile.

“You aren’t old, Harry. You’re twenty-nine. But if you think you’re old, then yes, I do like an old man like you. Ew, that sounds weird.”

Their bodies shook with their giggles, and Harry encircled his other arm around his waist so she could be pressed against him completely with no escape.

“M’lucky to have such a talented, intelligent, beautiful, powerful, an’ strong girlfriend… Even if she made me wait for it.” Y/N gasped and sunk her teeth into his shoulder, which made him squawk and tap her nose with his pointer finger.

“Asshole, it’s been only a month. If that’s a long time, we’re going to have a few problems.”

“Wha’ problems?” He shifted so he could look down at her a bit more comfortably.

“Well, if a month was a long time to wait, I don’t know how we’re going to do this, ‘cause I plan on keeping you for a lot longer than a miniscule month.” Y/N mumbled, and began to turn her face into Harry’s shoulder so he couldn’t see her.

“Oi, yeh always do tha’. M’pretty girl’s always running from me. S’enough. I plan on letting yeh keep me for a lot longer than a month, ‘cause I want to do the same.”

Y/N turned her face back toward him, one eye still smushed into his shoulder cutely. Harry cooed and brushed his fingers against her face, causing her to keen.

“Really?”

“Silly girl. Gotta realize m’not going anywhere.”

{ @lovableah }

[mateoshea-blog]

Pink Clouds & Pocket Lint

Part I

            “Grabmeuhcouplecokes… cotton mouth y’kno?” as Fast Eddie chokes out the last toke of the roach. Quickly, Fast Eddie stashes the funky skunky stuff into an old oxidized ALTOIDS can – MADE IN GREAT BRITIAN, NT WT 1.76 OZ (50g). Fast Eddie had this logic that if he collected all his roaches, he could pawn off the “1.76 OZ of homegrown” to some free-lancing left-brained Polo wearing yuppie college kid for 50 bones. If anyone could pull a stunt like that, it was Fast Eddie.

“Yafuckinkiddinme! ‘Spose I’ll hoof it across the street to PAULIE’S CORNER STORE since Pizza Face and Pretty Boy both got Cerebral Palsy all-a-sudden” – Yeah, that’s the villain I been scheming with since I got clipped from the umbilical cord. Fast Eddie, guy was a maniac with a potato head. But, his barber scalped a fade around his temples to precision. Jesus, I mean his barber was his actual wingman. He’d tell us to go to the gay barber. We’d be sitting in at SPEEDY’S CUTS while Fast Eddie was choppin’ the locks and we’d overhear,

“Fast Eddie what work will my soft hands be doing today?”

And Fast Eddie would dish it right back, “If you wanna play with more than these locks later, what would you want my sex hair to look like in the morning?”

Just like that, Fast Eddie had undercooked and greasy golden French fries atop his potato head. Slicked back and thin cut, ready to serve. Ready to be swallowed into a cheap customer’s mouth.             That’s why the drunks, gays, straights, in betweeners, freaks, creeps, geeks and neighbors all liked the fucking guy. Blue collar, told it how it was, and even offered a third hand when his other two were tied up someone else’s ass!

            I could see Fast Eddie still jerking around across the street. Shootin’ the shit with the local folk. More than just a “It’s so warm in here!” small talk guy. Nobody remembers the shmuck with a dull personality. Fast Eddie could make a blind guy fantasize about the cashier at PAULIE’S just by the way he worked his tongue into imagery. He had it.  Coupleuhcokes turns into Fast Eddie holding the door open for any pretty broad that gives him the slightest amount of eye contact (the polarizing effect of a good haircut). Perfect case study for Freud.

 The musty haze of the hotboxed jalopy paranoid the living daylights outta me! We could get high in any partatown and Fast Eddie always coerced us to smoking in his car. Never got to enjoy my high, could never even tell if I was even high at all. The mirrors read “OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR” – that’s for damn sure. Mirrors were always staring at me with a never-ending time-warped nightmare. I’d get stuck in the mud with the Piggy’s that busted me with the joint that was burning away my dreams of CALIFORNIA COAST. I could only roll in this mud pit for so long until the objects in the mirror become reality.

            Julian senses that one of my classic paranoia episodes is imminent. An observant learner, personal therapist, and mediator. Some of his unpaid roles. He uses the crank on both doors to roll down the clouded condensated windows.

“Carlton man, you love riding on the shoulder” chuckled Julian as he lounged in the plush back seat of the Caravelle.

“This is why I hate smokin’ grass, now you’re speaking straight from the hole that I call your CHAFFED LOOSE ASS!”

“Naw man… see listen, you ride the shoulder too much. That motherfucker ahead is always driving 5 miles per hour under the speed limit. You let him. And he owns you. He holds you back. He controls the rate at which you reach your destination. Shiiiit, if you ever reach it. You can’t pass him, you stay leaning on that white cozy shoulder called COMFORTABILITY. When you gonna pass the mothefucker ahead of you that’s been controlling you? When you gonna take EXIT 52 towards IMFUCKINFREEVILLE?” 

I can’t even flip this one on Julian, “Yeah well I can’t ride yours and Fast Eddie’s coattails for too long now. IMFUCKINFREEVILLE has a population of some twenty million people. Once the weather vane in my oversaturated brain oozes out some hope and blows WESTWARD, I will pass that motherfucker ahead of me. No turning signal either. Imma trade in the cozy white shoulder for some dotted yellow cheese.”

“Carlton… that motherfucker dragging ass is YOU. Pass him with a prayer, leave him in the rearview.”

Julian, the backseat monk. Met him after I graduated high school. P.F. Flyer’s always crispy white, not ever one crease, not ever one scuff. Always thought he would become some materialistic rich prick. Prejudgment without contempt. Stupid me. Materialism attached to the developing brains of us high schoolers. Some shake it and others go to Universities to chase degrees that breed greed. Julian didn’t let the manmade cancer infiltrate him. He ended up rolling with us Proletariat outlaws. Somewhere, Karl Marx is grinning at me for my recruitment.

We had 30 minutes, precisely, to make it to the liquor store. Saturday’s were always the night for our bender.

Fast Eddie had this shit-eatin’ grin on his face when jogged back over the ’85 Caravelle, “Christ Almighty! Fast Eddie were you rubbing one out in PAULIE’S bathroom or sumthin’? We’re alloutta Jameson and you know we are 20 miles from the liquor store and it’s already 8:30!”

Liquor stores were no joking matter, we only found one that never had us show I.D. Plus, Fast Eddie grew a liking to the geyser that worked there. A sad babbling sack of space that got comfortable and stuck with one job his whole life. Bubbling and babbling, day in and day out. Shook so many times that he eventually became flat too.

“Pizza Face and Pretty Boy… always so self-interested. Gonna catch up to you shits soon enough.” Fast Eddie inserted the crusted key into the ignition of the Caravelle – DOOOP, DOOOP, DOOOP. God knows how many germs were on that steering wheel. Thick coats of compiled grease, excess secretions, and the fluids from various estranged females that Fast Eddie coxed in to his traveling fuck-pen. Law of superposition says oldest layers were on the bottom. I’d rather not know these things, but the smell invades my nostrils like the troops on D-DAY. Can’t even condition or desensitize myself to this aroma. Unrelenting attacks by the smell of Fast Eddie’s ball sweat and lingering remnants of a poor mans weed. I want to take a shower. 

“Saturday Night. Dropping the needle down on a dusty B-Side for all you crazed, erotic, and hormonal souls cruising around looking for trouble. How about that L.A. WOMAN track… 1971. The Doors.” Slick Tom, our favorite disc jockey the night of a bender. Always reliable to set the tone.

Fast Eddie pounced on the pedal as Jim Morrison screeched sonic sex through the speakers, “Oh shit yeah fellas, we’re on the move. ‘MR. MOJO RISIN!’”

We punched it onto RT. 5. The faster route according to Fast Eddie, but it was actually the scenic route for him. He loved cruising past the prestigious Victorian style homes and dissecting what kind of conversations happen between the walls of those monasteries.

Fed up with the scenery after 3 miles, Fast Eddie barks “I bet these rich prick Dad’s just read the STOCK MARKET page in section B5 of the WALL STREET JOURNAL and ask their rich prick wives and rich prick kids where they wanna go on vacation next once the rich prick Dad’s inside trade deal hits on Monday morning.” 

“Put the boner back in your pants, you’ll get your dividends too once you start pushing your roach filled ALTOIDS cans to the future homeowners of these fucking houses!”

Fast Eddie snapped right back at me, “I swear I’ll ash my next roach on that smirk of yours, Pizza Face. Maybe that’ll make you look more appetizing.”

Julian leaned in from the backseat, “AN ENDLESS PISSING MATCH, don’t your sacks ever go dry? Your testicles are attached right to your egos. Big swollen ball sacks swinging back and forth back and forth. Blowing your load all over one another day in and day out! It’s exhausting, your egos need a vasectomy!”

Just like that, right when Fast Eddie and I erupted, Julian cooled us down at the surface like molten rock. Crystallizing and metamorphosing into conglomerate. Needed him to flush our egos out. Needed to stop treating him like my urinal cake.

Fast Eddie swerved and weaved around the slow-moving masses of society that had no agenda for the night. Maybe they did. Maybe this is my self-interested motivations speaking again. I hated how maliciously Fast Eddie rounded the corners. Guard rails could’ve skinned my fingertips if I cracked the window open. This was Fast Eddie’s route. Knew every stop sign, timed every red light, and new all the lucrative hideouts where the Piggy’s patrolled.

            It was 8:47, the odometer of the Caravelle twitched another mile on the dash. Only two miles remained between the three Proletariat outlaws and our enabler.

            My second paranoia episode ensues, “Holy Shit Fast Eddie, you’re doing 55 in a school zone!”

            “Who says I wanna choke down Jameson tonight? I’ll turn into De Niro from TAXI DRIVER if you don’t shut the hell up”

            Just like that GUMBALLS GUMBALLS GUMBALLS flash in the mirrors. Objects in the mirror are becoming closer than they appear. Nightmare come true. I’m fucking doomed. We are fucking doomed. My self-interest putting me first.

            “GODFUCKINGDAMMIT EDDIE! Mile away, no traffic, all interstate and now I’m gonna get jammed up with the Pigs!”

            Fast Eddie retaliates, “Me, me, me! You squeal just like a fucking pig!” He takes the pressure from my brain and applies it to the pedal, POUNCE.

            Julian has been around Fast Eddie enough to know that he will go to extremes to prove a point, “Fast Eddie c’mon man be cool, WE all ain’t trying to get canned. WE got living to do.”

            Fast Eddie has that same shit-eatin’ grin that I seen earlier, “Fine I’ll pull this piece over. But, you don’t speak Pig Latin, got it?”

            “What the hell do you mean!”

That’s all I was left to work with during my waning moments of freedom. The cop high tailed it over to the Caravelle. Tiny hairs, all a half inch long stick straight up and down on the officer’s fat head. Level one blade to navigate his temples, had to be Fast Eddie’s barber. I’m sweating bullets. The plate tectonics of my face begin to emerge. Premature pimples surface and I feel the magma boiling under the crust of my skin.

            Fast Eddie rolls down the window, “HANDS ON THE WHEEL OR BRAINS ON THE WHEEL NOW”

            My stomach launches acid into the back of my throat. Fast Eddie complies. Answers to an authority figure. No finger-fucking around.

            “NOT ONLY ARE YOU THREE LITTLE SHITS A LIABILITY ON THIS ROAD, DO I HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE YOU WERE SMOKING MARIJUANA?”

            Julian hasn’t flinched and Fast Eddie’s mute. Fast Eddie’s still got that shit-eatin’ grin on his face.

“AM I SPEAKING FUCKIN GREEK? IS THERE MARIJUANA IN THIS VEHICLE, THIS IS THE LAST TIME I WILL ASK BEFORE I SHAKE YOU DOWN TO YOUR PALE PEACH FUZZED ASSES!”

            In my peripheral I see the ALTOIDS can staring at me. Rusted smile, MADE IN GREAT BRITIAN. 1.75 OZ – damn near weightless. But, enough weight to land me in the sin bin.

Enough to land us in the sin bin.

            The Cop begins laughing, I mean really fucking laughing. The wild Pig chased his pray down and now he is foaming at the mouth. Ha-HA-HA-hahaha’ing until there is no oxygen remaining in his bloated stomach. Almost as if the funky stuff has protruded from the ALTOIDS can and immediately hit his bloodstream.

“ALRIGHT FAST EDDIE, THESE ARE THE PROLETARIAT OUTLAWS EH? OUR MOUSE TRAP COULDN’T CAPTURE A RAT!” 

Fast Eddie’s dimples break out from his skin for the first time in a decade, “Thanks OFFICER LAFFERTY! Next hoagie from PAULIE’S CORNERSTORE is on me!”

“I’ll take the ALTOIDS can instead… when it’s full.” He replies. Walks away, swinging his Billy-club.

Fast Eddie peeps his dilated eyes into the corner of  the mirror, glancing at Julian. “Pretty Boy whatsamatta! You didn’t croak! You didn’t squeal! Conglomerate don’t crack!”

Julian boasted,“Yeah, RATS don’t survive by scurrying on the shoulder. Too scared to chase the dotted yellow cheese if ya know what I mean. I gotta eat, I mean… WE gotta eat.”

“Amen.”

And, just like that comfortability didn’t appeal to me anymore. Lit the roach, took a toke, exhaled. Puff puff pass to Julian puff puff pass to Fast Eddie, and back to me. Repeat. Fast Eddie inserted the rusted key into the ignition – BOOOP BOOOP BOOOP. Slick Tom was steady playing them classic B-Sides. Liquor store was closed. Detour: EXIT 52 towards IMFUCKINFREEVILLE.