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#yea its a symptom that u have to unlearn. im sorry its such a fucking vibe kill
wizardyke · 11 months
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i think one thing that will always piss me off is people declining someone else's kindness or act of sercice or whatever because "they'll feel bad". like one time i could offer my friend a lift home, and they were like nooooooo dooont ill feel badddd. so do you want me to leave you in the middle of town at midnight? or im talking to my friend rn, and theyre saying that even though theyre a broke college student and their friend offered to pay for soemthing for them, no strinsg attached, they declined bc they felt bad. idk maybe its cause im azeri where we fight over on whos gonna pay. like.
realistically with my friend and lifts; they had no koney for a taxi and there were no buses running at that hour and its moronic to walk. of course they were gonna get a lift with me. but now you've made the outreach of my kindness some sort of transgression against you so much so that you feel bad. it makes it uncomfortable for everyone involved now. or my friend who's going hungry for the sake of not bithering their friends, now youre making your friends helpless bystanders and you hungry and miserable for like... ur pride?
and i HATTTEEEEE how non resolute it is. like when i dont want to eat where my friends want to i fet ny food from someplace else. or when my friend pays for something ill go out of my way to pay for something for them. or whej someone just generally does something nice for me, i thank them and show as much appreciation for that action & them as a friend! why on EARTH when someone doing something nice for you want to hear how fucking bad you feel about it???????? thats the opposite of why they want to do it for you. and its not even an alternative, its just a sitting down pity party. maybe id get it if it was some alternative solution ("ill cover the bill" "no we can split it evenly") but its just. self pity and flagellation ("ill cover the bill" "noOOoOOoo ill feel baddddddddd") youre not a monk youre not the pope and if you REALLY feel THAT bad then go to your fucking place kf worship where you can indulge in your bizarre martyr? complex in peace and stop ruining the fucking vibe
tldr: accept peoples kindness and help without making a big stink out of jt cause then ut makes the situation at hand a fucking downer & makes people not wanna help you in the future jf you need to be dragged by thr collar to make the right decision
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