#yall not gonna like dis one
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wrotelovelytears · 2 years ago
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I wake up and choose violence
Was going to add this to an observation post but fuck it we ball
I personally can't not stand the term "unevolved/toxic *insert a sign*". There's literally no one on this damn planet who never had/ doesn't currently have toxic traits. What one may define as toxic may not even be harmful for another individual. Toxicity only applies to self, it's not a one size fits all thing. No one was born knowing everything, nor will anyone die knowing everything. You are having human experiences and you will act on human behaviors and your socialization, simple as that.
For example:
"A toxic Scorpio may not be open to vulnerability".
A less judgemental way of phrasing that:
"Due to life circumstances (because that's what breeds toxicity in a being), Scorpios may struggle with vulnerability".
The second wording takes the blame off the individual and has a more humanizing approach. You are not your toxic traits, you are the changes you make to better (or worsen) yourself. It also acknowledges that it's a general thing less than an individualized one. To me it just makes people feel more seen and heard not judged and misunderstood.
While they both point out the same thing, it's not a matter of pointing something out it's a matter of explaining in a way that doesn't feel like an attack on a person's character.
Another thing with unevolved is what one might find to be "uplifting" for them, it may just not work out for others.
Both terms come from a place of judgement and bias, rather than understanding and acceptance.
I'm not saying you have accept everyone else's behaviors, it's just a tad hypocrital to say "xyz" is toxic because it's a trait you (no longer/don't) have. I can guarantee something you don't think is toxic is something that someone else thinks is. And yes, you have in fact harmed another person, willingly or not. That is why judgement based anything will not change behaviors and attitudes but rather inflame them. If you never learn something is bad for you, how can you understand when someone else says it is.
We all are doing the best we can with the tools we have, it's a matter of how one chooses to use the tools not if they use them.
Because being honest, everyone is toxic in their own way. It won't matter what the stars, a textbook or you say, we could all do better.
I truly think astrology and psychology should be used together for the betterment of individuals not to point out who does or has it worse. I'm glad I learned more about psychology before getting deep into astrology because if I didn't learn more about myself, yeah I would be thinking "damn I'm toxic according to this person's explanation".
Astrology is based on personal interpretation like most things in life. It's a social science meaning society has influence over the meaning not it has one and only one meaning. That's why we can all disagree and agree with things, it's our social and personal upbringing that impacts if something has certain meaning.
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On a side note,
That might be why so many people like the story of Lilith, not because of the tale or message (however you interpret it) , but because they can see parts of them in her. I won't sit her and say I've never acted in a "fuck everyone else my problems are theirs now" way because I definitely have, I just learned that it doesn't align with my personal values and brought more problems than ever solved them. So at some point yes, I was what one would define as *toxic Scorpio (or Plutonian)*. I didn't change because others wanted me to, I changed because I was sick of having temporary solutions to long term problems.
I just know people would never say they see parts of Narcissus in them. It's only because of societal interpretation. We've all put ourselves before others before, and sometimes it had a negative consequence.
Lilith is seen as a hot bad ass. Narcissus is seen as a self centered prick. But if you look at the stories they ain't that different. And you not that different from them either.
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bree-paints · 4 months ago
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My copium where they all survive and they are an iconic one eyed trio
Also some random sketches because 266-267 have been killing me emotionally thank you
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arolegos · 3 months ago
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mor of my cowboy ninja bullshit haiiiiiiiii . happy lesbian day!!!!
+ extra non cowboy amberpenis stuff!!! woohoo yuri!!!
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hideousvampire · 7 months ago
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you should… you should totally draw Johnny C, Daniel, Teddy, and Jeremy as the abbey road Beatles album
hehe 😁😁
you are very right for this
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mediumgayitalian · 10 months ago
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part one
———
Nico’s memory is…screwy.
The Lethe warped things, but the body stores memory in strange ways. The only image he has of his mother is the gentle swish of her skirts as Zeus incinerated her, the echo of her fond scoff and curled r’s. Even that memory was shown to him. Most of his childhood memories are from the Lotus Casino, really, running after Bianca through the flashing games and then running away from her, laughing, when she forbid him from driving on the racetrack. His sister is the centre of his memories. He keeps them under lock and key, buried in the same place he keeps Mythomagic stats and his constant string of fear.
(The key is rusted and the lock is loose. He sees her in every mirror, now, in every mirror. She was pretty. Beautiful. He always thought so. She hid herself in too-large sweaters and shapeless skirts, crooked stockings and her floppy green hat. Kept her hand curled around his, turned away from the boys who smiled at her, touched her shoulders. She was his entire world, and he is beginning to realize that he was her world, too, only she had no one to care for her. It makes Nico ache to think about, the tears he sometimes saw welling up in her dark eyes, the creases in her angular, beautiful face. Her pain is as familiar in his reflection as the shape of her nose, identical to his.)
(Gorgeous, Will called him.)
Warped as his memories are, Nico isn’t completely stranded — he has dreams.
His dreams, although rare, are clear. He is a spectator of himself, and voyeur of his own life. He does not remember Venice, does not remember his bedroom, the country side, the kitchen table. But he remembers every dream he has.
Including, embarrassingly, a lecture that had both him and Bianca red-cheeked and scowling.
“You-a smart, bambina,” Maria had said to Bianca, squeezing her chin with flour-covered hands. “Una belladonna giovane, si, Niccolò?”
Nico had snickered into his hands, legs kicking, looking at his sister cross-eyed with his tongue sticking out.
“Bianca è una picchia,” Nico had teased, repeating his mother’s words from the last time she’d been scolded. “Una piantagrane!”
Bianca’s eyes had flashed. “Nico, I’m gonna sell your stupido toys —”
“Sonno worries forra my Bianca,” Maria had interrupted, eyebrows raised. “Ragazzi comma running. But you, Niccolò.” She dragged him back by the cuff of his shirt, cutting off his escape attempts. ““È importante, capisci? Lookame. Niccolò. Lookame.”
He spent a lot of time fidgeting, he remembers. Bouncing off the walls.
His mother was patient.
“You gonna be uno marito, un giorno. Gonna marry a nice-a girl. You gotta sai come fate.”
He wakes up from the dream embarrassed.
He knows why it was brought from the depths of his subconscious. He’s not dense. But he wishes, as he rips the sheets off his sweaty body, that it had stayed in those stupid trenches.
His mother’s raspy, cigarette-smoker voice twists with Will’s smooth rumble: You gonna be uno marito, one day. I’ve had a crush on you for forever.
He buries his burning face in his knees. What is Will’s problem. Who says that?
Nico has had crushes before. Telling Percy made him nauseous for three days. And Will just — said it. Said it!
He rolls onto the floor, refusing to think about it any longer. He has things to do today. Children to humble. He cannot afford — distractions.
Of course, he is distracted anyway.
He hears the kids in his sword fighting class whisper to themselves. They usually do, but there’s an audible difference to it; they sound more like the giggling naiads than nervous kids. Nico spends all three of his classes tense as a rod, stiffer than he usually is a suffering for it.
He dismisses each one of his classes early.
By lunchtime, he’s exhausted. He’s tempted to skip all together, but yesterday he ran out of snacks, and if he skips two days in a row Will’ll come marching, which is the last thing he needs. He lingers in the amphitheatre, biting the inside of his thumb, weighing his options. Eat with a crowd of people, go hungry.
In the end, the choice is made for him.
He startled when his name is called by a group of people, each with similar levels of enthusiasm. Leo, Piper, Jason, and Annabeth — Percy is with his mom this week, Nico recalls — approach him, waving.
“We are flagrantly breaking the rules and eating at Jason’s table,” Piper says, smiling. “Sit with us.”
She says it like an offer, but Nico has a feeling it’s more of a command. He nods, hesitantly falling in step with Annabeth.
(His friendship with her startled him. So many years seething with jealousy, simmering with misplaced hate and pain; only to find out she’s stubborn, like he is, and kinda cagey. She knows what it’s like growing up glancing over your shoulder. They stand the same, shoulders loose but knees locked; and eat the same, like they’ll never see food again. She knows when to let him have his silence. He knows when to let her have her space.)
She nods at him, smiling slightly. Her grey hairs are dyed with pink, today. It clashes horribly with her camp shirt. It suits her.
“Kids do alright today?”
“Yeah.”
“Harley blow anything up?”
“Yeah.”
“Impressive, that one.”
Nico smiles. “Yeah.”
They’re the last ones to the dining pavilion. Most tables are already full, conversations rising and lulling, food disappearing from plates. Several people duck close to their friends as they walk by, whispering. Nico pretends not to notice, pretends not to see Annabeth’s frown.
“Nico! Hey! I was just about to come find ya!”
Tripping in his haste to get up from his table — or maybe over his snickering sister’s extended foot — Will bounds up to meet him, hair flopping into his eyes, grin wide and blinding.
Nico’s palms begin to sweat.
“Will,” he acknowledges, after a beat too long.
Will doesn’t seem to notice.
(Everyone else does.)
“Just wanted to let you know that I was up last night digging through the records, and I found a hymn that’ll fix up your face faster. Not that it needs fixing.” He winks, or maybe tries to. What he really does is blink both eyes, beam so bright it forces smile lines. Nico goes bright red. “So just drop by whenever! I’m not on duty today, but it’s cool, just come find me. Better sooner than later, right?”
He doesn’t wait for Nico’s response, already half turned away by the end of his sentence. “See ya!” he shouts, too loud for the limited size of the dining pavilion, already stumbling back to his table, halfway through a new conversation with Austin. He watches him, amused, indulging.
“So,” says a teasing voice, dragging out the vowel, gleeful. Nico turns to find four identical smirks. “He sounded eager.”
“Nope,” Nico says immediately, turning back the way he came. His face continues to grow exponentially more red, which at this point must be some kind of hazard. “Food is overrated. I’m gonna —”
“Oh, no you don’t,” and then there’s a hand clenched in the back of his jacket, pulling, and four echoing cackles, and he’s dragged over to Jason’s table kicking and hissing. “Time for you to spill.”
———
part three
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wow-an-unfunny-joke · 2 months ago
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Dazai leans over the edge, a strong gust of wind is all it would take to push him over, to send him falling to his sweet, ultimate demise.
Chuuya grabs his arm in a strong grip- but he doesn't pull Dazai away from the edge. Chuuya looks Dazai straight in his eyes. Bright blue eyes meet Dazai's and he says in a firm voice,
"If you jump, you'll kill both of us."
And it's clear, right then, how deeply Chuuya trusts Dazai.
And Dazai doesn't jump.
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god-tier-bastard · 9 months ago
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PLEASE tell me someone else realizes that the push for kristen specifically to take the Last Standard is so scary because if she dies (which is pretty likely given that they all went ham on the first turn and it's an endurance test that no one's ever seen the end of) the LAST LIVING PERSON THAT BELIEVES IN CASSANDRA AS SHE TRULY IS DIES.
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darewolfcreates · 5 months ago
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round and round and round it goes
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the original colors before the scanner butchered it.
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moonlitlex · 6 months ago
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honestly i could write essay after essay about everything that made that finale bad. and i will. however comma i genuinely do not care about any of these characters enough to want to do that. i don't want to spend my time critiquing and analysing a show where all the characters are boring and the plot is all deus ex machina.
LIKE. WHO IS RUBY. WHO IS SHE. WHO FUCKING IS SHE.
she's done with the whole SEASON. she was in EVERY episode. and we literally don't know anything about her apart from the whole mom mystery thing which is all for the big reveal at the end anyway?
and i can talk about the ways in which that was unsatisfying and so on. but like what does that tell us about RUBY? what do we know about HER
and the answer is honestly very little. ruby is such a stock doctor who companion that it's just kind of boring. she gets a big mystery, because of fucking course she does, and who is she outside of that? nice?? sweet?? does as she's told?? (this one is fucking boring btw) kind of like the chibnall companions, she's whoever she needs to be for the situation at hand. the writers say ruby needs to be shocked by landing on a planet after 6 months of travelling with the doctor, so she is. she isn't a person. she has one desire, which is to find her mother, and the only reason she gets to have that is that rtd needs to set up whatever the fuck was going on with her mom for the finale. that's it.
and the doctor. like why should we care about this doctor specifically, outside of the fact that this is the character we have been following for the whole show? who is he??? like seriously who is he? he doesn't get any character development? what makes him different from other doctors? who the fuck is this guy????
i said earlier that ncuti's doctor is what you get when you throw all the doctors in a blender and i stand by that. he's definitely the doctor, but he's like an average of all the other doctors with nothing particularly unique or special about him. ruby is what you get when you throw all the companions in a blender. definitely a companion, with nothing unique or special about her either. much like chibnall's companions, all she gets to do is stand around and watch.
and the crucial missing factor is we don't get to see what they see in each other. which from the companion's perspective is still excusable because here's a dude with a spaceship time machine and that sounds kind of sick so lets go and travel with him is an understandable motivation. but what does he see in her? because there's always a moment where you can see the doctor sort of think, oh yeah, i should travel with this person.
but there isn't really this moment with ruby. it's kind of like with how thirteen meets her companions. she just sort of runs into them, and now they're stuck together. and ncuti does get to emote more than jodie, so at least you can see that ruby and the doctor do like each other, but their relationship isn't really fleshed out ever. and like i can buy ruby risking her life for him, because that is just sort of what happens on doctor who, but it's not based on anything. we don't see them develop this trust of each other. their relationship doesn't get developed. it just appears fully formed.
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bugwolfsstuff · 5 months ago
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I will not take any Chiron slander
That centaur is blameless and tired.
The only criticism i agree with on him is the fact that he really shouldn't have made Percy tell Nico Bianca fucking died
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smol-tired-binch-blog · 2 months ago
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OC x Canon ship chart time :)
The OG boys are sickeningly adorable with their yearning and pining and There's These Two Cunts
Blank version for anyone who wants a go
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rainbowpotatocakes21 · 2 months ago
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bury your gays still being a thing in 2024 is wack
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sea-buns · 4 months ago
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Gonna miss the cr ep tonight cuz I'm out of town but u bet ur ass I'm liveblogging that monday upload
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svnflowermoon · 7 months ago
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why can i literally not function at school like i swear i'm trying i just can't focus????
#luc posts#like i take notes but then i get bored and the doodle on the side of my page thst was meant to take 5 seconds took 10 minutes :(#and then im lost and bc im lost i get all fidgety and i keep doodling and then jts just a cycle#if i work for 20 minutes i feel like ive ran a marathon and i have to take a 40 minutes drawing/staring into the distance break#and im gonna fail maths but theres literally nothing i can do no matter what i do I can't focus for over 20 minutes at a time#and then its the end of class and i feel guilty bc oh i didnt do any work :( like i feel bad and i want to fix it but idk whats wrong so ho#can i fix it if i dont know whats wrong with meeeee#ugh#it literally makes me want to cry am i just lazy is that what it is am i literally useless why cant i work#like i was so ahead kf the average grades and i never learnt to study and now ugh i dont know how to function so i just dont#and it doesn't help that my friends are all geniuses#like they complain about their one mark away from full marks and im just like OH MY GOD if i could just focus then i coukd do so well#likr ok i guess i wont mention tjst i failed that test bc yall sre complaining about getting one mark off fukl makrs#likr fuckkkk okay i have so mucb potential why di i waste jt :(((((#i hate school so mucb#i genuinely consider dropping out sometimes like I CANT DO THIS hiw do these peiole di ut how hiw how someone tell me how to function#like these peiole getting top marks withiut eben truijgn and i tyr and i cant fishcis so i fail snd then ufh i want to die#bc its so embarassing i eas like top 10% of the class a few years ago and now i just cant function like how do these peiple do itso#someone explain ot me how oieolem focus and dony get distracted and ginish things kike ugh
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REALLY IMPORTANT UPDATE PLEASE READ
Hey y’all, so this blog is probably gonna be on a VERY SHORT hiatus. Just like. Literally less than a week.
The short long of it all is that my parents are coming in tonight for the holidays and unfortunately as much as I tired I didn’t have time to queue up enough stuff for that period of time.
The ask box is STAYING OPEN during this period of time! So you CAN keep sending stuff in there just won’t be any polls for a hot second! Holidays are just kinda hectic, you know? Lol
But thanks again for everyone’s support and I’ll see y’all after I’m done showing my beach parents around the mountains haha
Also! In case anyone is interested! Cartoon Network is on YouTube streaming Holiday Special reruns of their cartoons for FREE for this month! Here’s the link! Happy Holidays and go watch cartoons!!
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vanlegion · 7 months ago
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Eh, I was in a weird experimental mood. Have this. Dubbed 'Who Are You?' Pretty sure I've said this but I love characters that either are not human or beyond human... because existentialism is fun to think about.
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My monitor makes this look 3-D which is awesome.
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