#ya i know i only listen to the same three genres fuck off

[effy-writes]

Addict (Blitz x Reader)

6: Spring Broken: Craxk

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I love this song!" Blitz chimed, turning up the volume. "You were a spicy little- uh- Demon with the- uh- bleach blonde haaaair!"

Loona looked annoyed, Moxxie was covering up his "ears", you and Millie was looking out the window smiling.

The van came to a sudden stop, giving everyone in there whiplash. A pink car with the words "Sucks 4 Life" was in their original parking spot.

"Oh, you "suck for life", do ya? Listen up, you unoriginal pink cum dump! You have three goddamn seconds to get your tits out of my parking spot!"

The passenger of the car stepped out and Blitz's jaw dropped. "Oh, shit! Verosika!"

"Blitzo" She smirked.

"I should have known you'd be here. I could smell fish for miles, which is odd. Because, I believe the nearest ocean is..." He stepped out from the car and fell flat on his face. "three rings down!"

You turned your head to Millie, "How do they know each other?"

"Beats me." She shrugged.

You were familiar with Verosika, you saw her at that rehab place that you were at for two months, but you only saw her once or twice before Verosika left.

"And I should have known you'd be here when I heard the Amber Alerts."

"Oh, yeah? I'm surprised they let your fat ass outta rehab. I can see you're still a drunken whore, clutching onto that Beelzejuice bottle like it's the last cock in Hell!"

Verosika pulled out a flask, "They let me out because I'm still famous. And rehab is for sad, loser wash-ups. So, your sister says "Hi","

Oh shit, I completely forgot about Barbie. Can't believe I forgot about her. Does Blitz know about it?

The two bickered about the parking spot while you were deep in your thoughts.

Loona got out of the van, "You know Verosika Mayday?"

"Huh...? Oh, yeah. Her, yeah. We dated."

You jumped out of the van, "You guys dated?"

"Oh shit, Y/n. When did you get out of rehab?" Verosika laughed.

Loona, Millie, and Moxxie looked at you, "You were in REHAB?" Moxxie shouted.

"Long story." Fucking hell.

"Okay let's get back to the main point, our fucking parking spot! Let's go handle this shit."

~~~

Loona, Vortex and Blitz was engaging in a conversation about the office that's right across from I.M.P.

"Oh, no you don't, bitch." Blitz muttered.

"Sir... how about you let me go in and try to reason with her? I don't really listen to what's classified as "pop genre" music, so her status to me is name recognition alone..." Moxxie suggested.

Blitz glared at Moxxie, "In my opinion, her music is a bit derivative of-"

"Shut the fuck up!" He interrupted.

Moxxie sighed and walked through the door to talk to her gang.

You turned towards Blitz. "When did you date her?"

"Like 2 years ago probably. Did you see her and my sister?"

"Yeah.." You mumbled. "I was in there for about two months or so, I only saw Verosika once or twice, she ended up leaving way before I did."

"And my sister?"

"She was still there when I left. We didn't talk that much, I think we were both in shock."

Blitz changed the conversation. "Moxxie, don't let her access any of your holes!"

Moxxie quickly ran out of the room, lipstick marks all over him. "I... I gotta go lie down... now."

"Oh, this won't STAND!" Blitz rushed into the same room, you following behind.

"Alright that's it, If you're gonna be shitty to my employees, then I challenge you to a fuckin'... challenge! Fuck, I said that twice."

"Mm this imp boy starting a duel?" One of the succumbs said.

"I think he is!" Verosika laughed. "And brought his crack head wittle fwiend with him!" She baby talked.

"Oh shut the fuck up."

"Just speaking the truth, so, what's the game Blitzo."

"Every year, you STD spreaders go up topside for easy pickin's while spring break is a prime time for crime of all kinds! So I bet... you succu-bitches can't fuck as many people as we can off by the end of the day."

Everyone laughed, Verosika got down on his level, "Game on, bitch."

~~~

"Alright, shut your assholes! Here's how we're gonna do this shit! First, we find a fuck ton of clients."

Blitz proceeded to draw out the steps with poorly bad drawings.

"...Do you have... any questions?"

"Uh, yeah. What was that nonsense?" Moxxie stood up.

Blitz argued with Moxxie, you on the other hand stood up to go to the bathroom to snort adderal that you found behind a dumpster, Hope this isn't laced.

"Uh where are you going?" Blitz questioned.

"Bathroom."

"No. Any more non dumbass questions?"

Loona spoke, "Hey, is there a way where I can come?"

You got an idea, tons of college students has drugs. "Yeah me too!"

"Absolutely not, I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry, sweetie. Spring break is no place for young, vulnerable goth girls. And Y/n you said it yourself, you're a janitor."

You shrugged, "I can help lure people in."

"Well, I can blend in with humans easy enough. Just let me tag along." Loona added.

"Wait...you can blend in?" Millie asked.

"Yeah? Don't you guys have human disguises?" Nobody said anything, "You three have been screwing around on Earth this whole fucking time... without human disguises? Y/n what about you?"

"I only been up there once against my will. So don't drag me into this." You put your hands up in defense.

"Alright new plan! Loonie can help lure the humans to us, and we'll take care of the rest. Okay, how about that?"

"What about me?" You questioned.

"Bring your fucking broom and start WACKIN!"

"I think you're missing the biggest issue, sir. Isn't it crucial to have a client who demands enough kills to win this bet? We aren't just going up to massacre!" Moxxie intervened.

"I got that covered, Mox."

~~~

"Now, remember, we can't be seen, alright? And loose shots will likely cause a panic, so Loona can help with leading targets to a better spot to off 'em. You got the list, Loonie?" Blitz got his gun ready.

"Got it."

Loona transformed into a human looking version of herself, as your eyes widened, "You look beautiful!"

"You look...downright awful!" Blitz dawned. "I am so proud, now fetch!"

Loona and the rest got targets, while you were staring at the crowd, trying to see if you can find anybody snorting or even buying drugs. In order to not get caught of you obviously being an imp, you put a beanie on to cover up the horns and wrapped your tail around your waist. However you being red doesn't do you justice.

"Alright, spring breakers! Y'all ready to get fucked up and make some BITCHIN' BAD CHOICES!" Verosika shouted from the stage, inducing the crowd to roar her name.

You walked in between of people, trying to find just anything to get your hands on. With Verosika singing her mating song, everybody stopped what they were doing and started to get all sensual.

"This is my chance." You muttered. You found a couple smoking something out of a pipe. As you got closer it looked like was a crack pipe. "Bingo."

You walked over to them, and since they were too caught up making out you were able to grab the pipe and the lighter from their hands and lit it up, inhaling the stimulate. Within seconds your eyes dilated, heart raced, and you've been waiting for this feeling for a long time.

You saw Blitz and Loona in the distance arguing and turned the other way so you wont get caught with Blitz.

While walking away from the crowd you wanted to run and dance, but was afraid of Blitz catching you. With each second the drug took over and you started doing tricks and flips with the broom that you have. I probably look crazy as hell right now, you laughed.

You ended up tripping on the broom and fell in front of Millie and a very drunk Moxxie.

"Hey Y/n! How you been?" Millie smiled.

You stood still and gave her a thumbs up with a crack out smile.

Moxxie laughed, "Fish."

Confused, the two of you turned around and saw a huge monster-looking fish grab Moxxie.

"Moxxie!" Millie shouted before running towards the fish.

You had so much energy you needed to run and fight along. The two of you wrestled with the fish and with your cracked out strength you opened its mouth.

"Let's go Y/n!" Millie cheered, helping Moxxie out of the fish, and by helping she threw him.

In the distance Blitz was holding Moxxie, watching this fight.

"I love that woman," Moxxie smiled.

"Oh, she totally pegs you, doesn't she?" Blitz dropped his face once he caught a glimpse of you. "Holy shit, since when did she start to fight?"

You and Millie swam to shore, Millie out of breath, and you were still pumped up with energy.

"Oh my god that was amazing!" You shouted, jumping up and down. Blitz dropped Moxxie and walked over to you.

Your smile dropped and turned to walk away but he forcefully grabbed your arm, "Oh fuck you." He spat.

"Wait, Blitz I can explain!" He let go of your arm.

"You were clean for so long!"

He still doesn't know about the adderal, but you decided to keep it a secret. "I'm sorry-"

"Don't." He jabbed his finger into your chest before walking away.

"Blitzo." Verosika walked up to him, "Leaving Y/n like how you left me?"

"She left me first." He gritted through his teeth.

Millie interrupted this dispute about you and Blitz. "I don't think this belonged to any of us." Millie showed Verosika her flask. "Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys were behind a giant monster fish in the human world."

"Oh, Satan! You're gonna be so... FUUUUCKED!" Moxxie drunkly laughed.

"Y'know, we could keep this little B-movie scene on the down low if you agree to let us use that parking space." Blitz smirked.

"Fine." She agreed, crossing her arms.

"But we won! In your face bitch!" He flipped her off. "Come on, Loonie Tooney! Let's go back and park our fat fuckin' car in our fat fuckin' space!"

Everyone jumped into the portal, you following behind of Loona.

~~~

"Going to my room don't bother me!" Loona shouted before slamming her door.

You laid down on the couch, back facing Blitz. He sat down on the other end, neither of you saying a word to each other.

"Why did you do it?" He broke the silence. You just shrugged.

"Planning on being a coke and meth head? Planning on leaving me?" He raised his voice.

"I don't know why I did it." You mumbled. Blitz exhaled and rubbed his face.

"Don't ever pull that shit again, okay?"

You wanted to ask him if he even cares about you and if this is why he's mad other than his fear of you leaving him again, but you don't want to know the answer, you don't want to get hurt.

[gougeandkill]

tagged by @treago write 10 songs that you like/love and then tag 10 people (or not); new rule: only one song per artist/band (i really really like my music ok guys so i gave a short nerdy blurb about each song lol)

1) (x) 豊聡耳のヘッドフォンにブレイクコア流して鼓膜破壊し隊 // kyou1110  - - kyou1110 is like my fav artist rn and it was really hard to choose a song from him but i decided on this one cause reasons

2) (x) Mdrqnxtagon // Frums  - - tbh 1:14 to the end is one of the most beautiful pieces of music ive ever heard

3) (x) OTENAMI Hurricane // t+pazolite  - - combines my two favorite genres (speedcore and breakcore)

4) (x) Love Love Love You I Love You // DJ TECHNORCH  - - reminds me a lot of amon tobin, this song is a bit like dubstep but abstracted and more noisy with a some gabber elements thrown in, its really cool

5) (x) firstmode // Kobaryo  - - short and sweet speedcore, high energy, and samples the amen break so honestly this is the quickest way to my heart

6) (x) sakura+sakura // moro  - - this song is so fucking pretty and elegant honestly?? i love the minimalist melody

7) (x) DEPROGRAMMED SUN+ // RYUWAVE  - - okuu’s theme is like, perfect for this genre honestly, and i never realized until i heard this banger

8) (x) β (Camellia’s “βlΑst-Ωff” Remix) // BlackY (remixed by Camellia)  - - hhhot sexy speedcore

9) (x) Dying Breath of Stokesia // Yuuyu (i cannot find this song anywhere else for the life of me so the link is to the itg video)  - - these last two choices are much less noisy and obnoxious than my others, this one is really pretty, it almost makes me feel nostalgic? idk but its a very specific emotion i can’t describe, i love it

10) (x) Pernicious Deed // SABREMISSILE (another song i found thru srt)  - - a rare electronic song that i really love that isn’t speed or breakcore, honestly this is one of my all time favs, i love the faint vocal samples and how smooth the song’s intensity changes

i will tag some mutuals, sorry if you don’t like being tagged, y’all don’t have to do this but if you like~ @dogecream-sundae @droolphobia @enjoythepetrichor @flurplemurpmurp @danthemanramos @fuckshitavenue @faeline

[inkofyoonkoo]

Into my bones

🌸 Wordcount: 15k

🌸 Genre: Fluff/light angst/smut | From FWB to lovers!AU

🌸 Min Yoongi x Reader

🌸 Description: Small slice-of-life scenes in non-chronological order that describe the slow growth of your relationship, started as a friends-with-benefits affair. Aka, Yoongi is dumb and learns that love can’t be controlled.

🌸 A/N: To celebrate my return here, here’s one of my Yoongi’s stories I love the most.

Hope you’ll enjoy it!

Good read ♥

Day 2

When Yoongi kissed you at the Halloween party, it’s not like he wanted anything from you.

He was there only because Jimin had to introduce him to one of his classmates; soon after, Seokjin discovered it and decided to accompany him to give him some moral support (but Yoongi wasn’t born yesterday. It was crystal clear that his best friend followed him only to hit on Park Byeol, who, in turn, was there to hit on Kim Taehyung). And Jimin’s friend, in the end, turned out to be the most boring girl in the solar system, so much that he prayed that the alcohol could knock him out instantly.

It wasn’t in his plans to find himself on the balcony with his hands on your hips and his lips sealed on your own.

Frankly, he was very veeery drunk and very veeery pissed off for being stuck in that living nightmare; and you were very veeery sexy in that pretty banal, pretty tight latex suit of Catwoman.

You were a side-effect of three beers, two glasses of wine, and your heart-attack ass, that’s all.

But… ugh, well… ok, honestly, it’s almost a year that Yoongi doesn’t fuck, and once back in his dormitory he touched himself under the sheets after six months not doing it, thinking about your body against his own. And it happened again this morning, under the shower, still replaying you in his mind.

This has been a more than enough reason to reply to your message sat in his phone for a few hours –he didn’t even remember you exchanged numbers- and agree to meet up at the bar close to the KUN of Arts –he didn’t even remember you attended the same university- oblivious of what might happen now that you’re both sober.

And so there you are, barely fifteen steps away, some soft music playing in the background, and definitively different from the sexy kitten that he treasures in the back of his mind: your hair is worn in a tidy ponytail, a light touch of eyeliner sketches your eyes fixed on a book, and a turtleneck sweater accents the soft line of your breast.

You’re less glitzy, but still able to set his lower abdomen on fire.

His heart does an annoying flattering thing in his chest as he approaches you, the body shattered by a nervousness he hasn't felt since he stopped dating girls. He sees you take the mug to your mouth, a simple and not-so sensual gesture that throws him back to the instant before you kissed -when you drank straight for his bottle of beer and he thought that your lips would look amazingly on his own, or around his dick–!

“Holy shit!” The collision with the edge of the table snaps him back down to reality. He rubs his hip and lays his stare on you, who finally took notice of his presence. “Hi,” he mumbles, nose scrunched for the pain.

You divert your wide stare and badly squelch a laugh, risking to choke on your coffee -the tonality of your laughter is annoying, now that his brain isn’t soaking in the alcohol anymore.

He pokes the tongue on his cheek. “What?”

You moisten your lips. “Nothing, but your hair… I thought it was a wig.” You watch him  take a seat beside you, amused by his pout. “Purple… it’s pretty cool!” You reach out to touch his fringe.

He moves away. “Hands off! I don’t like to be touched by strangers.”

“You didn’t seem to mind, yesterday,” you tweet.

A line appears between his knitted brows. “Listen, ahm… you, I was blind drunk! I didn’t know what I was doing!”

“And do you know it, now?”

Of course he does! More or less? The fact is that he isn’t so sure about it anymore. Actually, he wasn’t really sure even when you sent him a smiley emoji at his “See ya at noon.” It must have been the booze, the atmosphere, but you seemed more meek and nicer at the party… but now, you look like one of those girls he avoids like the plague because he just doesn’t like them.

He feels it right into his bones that this bullshit won’t do him any good.

He scratches his hair. “Yeah, sure, otherwise I wouldn’t be here.” He twiddles with his ring. “What about you, instead?”

You pause, long enough to catch every detail of his face, the curve of his thick brows that give him an always-pissed-off look. Then, you smile amused. “Funny… not only you forgot my name, but also that you’ve been the one to ask me out, yesterday.”

… ok, it’s decided, he hates you!

“Let me refresh your memory: you had a little thing in mind. Something that has to do with us and the backseat of your car.“ You rest your chin on your palm, munching the corner of your mouth. "I’m curious to know if it’s true what you told me about your tongue technology.”

A flush spreads from the collar of his brownish sweater to the tip of his ears.

Oh, shit… he didn’t say that bullshit since high school! He can’t have said it! But he told you, apparently?! Holy. Fucking—!

“I’m (Y/N), anyway. You know, I’d like you to not scream someone else’s name. It’d be… embarrassing. My self-esteem could be badly affected.”

Despite himself, Yoongi squelches a rocky chuckle, lowering his head to hide the small smile that’s running from cheek to cheek. He goes back to scrutinizing you only when he doesn’t feel your stare boring through his skin anymore: you’re reading your book, peaceful, as if you were used to discuss with a complete stranger about where and when to fuck.

“I’m Yoongi, anyway.” He unconsciously spreads his legs, hand softly resting on his groin. “But you can call me ‘Your majesty’. Otherwise, my self-esteem could be badly affected.”

You rip your eyes off the pages, engulfing your stare into his own. A myriad of sparks are floating into them, the same ones he caught when you were on the balcony, basking in your silence, contemplating each other. 

“So, my class will start within two hours…” you shift your stare from his face to his legs. “Do you want to fuck me at my place or yours?”

Yoongi runs the tip of his tongue on his lower lip, then tights it between his teeth.

You tuck some hair behind your ear when you receive back only silence. “You… you wanna fuck me, don’t you?”

Holy shit, he wants to fuck you so badly.

He swallows. “Your house is ok.”

Yoongi rips his eyes off the Anthropology of Music book, his somber stare now fixed on Jin’s curious expression as he waits for the new Super Mario’s level to load. “Nothing.”

 11 months 20 days

“Oh, you’re running out of ideas? If you want, I can teach you a good recipe for a romantic dinner–”

“What are you going to organize for your anniversary?“

“No. I won’t do shit,“ he interrupts, going back to reading. "It isn’t serious between us, why should we celebrate something that doesn’t exist?”

Jin’s stare widens. “You… it’s a joke, isn’t it?” He snorts a laugh, and yet there’s a glint of annoyance in his calm voice that obliges Yoongi to pay his utmost attention. “You’re seeing each other every day for almost a year—”

“Only for fucking. More or less.“

"You go out for dinner, she spends her weekends here, you spend whole weeks at her place, you go shopping together, you’re exclusive. Oh, you also take her to your studio and you don’t allow anybody to go there, even me–”

“Only 'cause you’re annoying and you distract me.”

“And you’re telling me it isn’t serious?!” Seokjin gives him a sidelong glance. “You’d be less embarrassing if you’d admit you love her.”

Yoongi grimaces. “For goodness sake, what’s with this bullshit now?! I don’t love her! It’s just… what it is!” He scratches his blond hair. “Two people who often meet up and happily fuck, that’s all!”

Seokjin arches a brow. “You know it stopped being 'what it is’ when you left some room for her clothes in your wardrobe, mh?”

Before Yoongi could reply, or metabolize the bullshit his friend said -and smother him with a pillow- you peep out in the living room and say, “Yoongi-chi? I’m going out to buy some meat.” You’re calm, you don’t seem to have grasped their delirious conversation. Your stare flickers from him, curled up to the corner of the sofa, to his friend. “Jin, are you going to stay for dinner?”

Yoongi squeaks, “Hey, this is my home! I should–”

“I’d love to, (Y/N). Can I help you cook?”

“Yes please. May you cut the vegetables? I’d like to cook some Japchae.”

“You can’t cook it!”

“That’s not true. The other day, you told me it was delicious!” You tweet.

“You made me drink! I wasn’t lucid!” Yoongi stands up, following you to the front door, the sound of your airy laugh makes him smile. “Put this on, it’s pouring outside.” He takes his beanie and puts it on your head. “Treat it well, it’s my favorite.”

“I know. I bought it when you passed your exam.” You fix it, delivering him a beaming smile. When you notice he’s about to fish out the wallet from his pocket, you stop him. “You paid last time already. Today is up to me.” You give him a light kiss. “See you later, Yoongi-chi.”

He watches you go and closes the door only when you disappear from his sight. When he turns, a soft smile gracing his face, he notices that Jin is leaning against the wall with crossed arms.

He arches a brow. “What?”

He rolls his eyes before going to the kitchen. “I was right, you don’t deserve someone like her.”

You’re annoying.

You spent more than an hour in a music store -his favorite, actually, not just an ordinary music store- discussing on who is better between Depeche Mode (you) and The Clash (him); but despite his strong desire to take your head off whenever you breathed, he had lots of fun.

 2 months 24 days

Now that he thinks of it, he doesn’t often talks about music with one his fucks. He usually lets things die without deepening the acquaintance, but with you words fly out his mouth naturally, as if it was a habit to turn to you when he’s still shaken by the orgasm and tell you about the last concert he attended, or the last exam he’s preparing…

However, today, he regrets he didn’t go out of bed with his dick still wet and didn’t leave as he usually does. “Holy shit, why did I fuckin’ bring you here?!” He crosses his arms harder.

Really, Yoongi has never met a girl more annoying than you: you’ve always to have the last word, you’ve to retort to everything he says and, obviously, you’ve to have different music tastes.

“Because I asked you if you wanted to come with me and you told me: ’yes’.”

“It was an orgasm, not a yes.”

“Aw, I thought it was the same,“ you tweet, looking at a box of headphones. “And, anyway, you’re still in time to go. I don’t think I cuffed you at me.”

But Yoongi doesn’t go. He mumbles, curses under his breath, he huffs… but he stays, beside you, elbow to elbow. There’s something -something in the way your eyes crinkle in the corner, in that smirk tugging at your lips, in the peacefulness in your voice when you reply to him, or how you lightly hum the songs passing on the radio- that makes him stand still in his favorite music shop, waiting for you to do… whatever you have to do.

He jams his hands into his pockets, scrutinizing the various types of headphones tidily disposed of on the shelves. “What are you searching for, exactly?”

“Dunno… what would you buy for a friend who’s been accepted to the Universal Ballet?” You rest your hand on your cheek, lips curled. “I wanna buy him something nice.”

Many questions race through his mind right now: who’s this dude? Do you two regularly fuck just like you do with him? How many guys are you seeing other than him? What the fuck is the Universal Ballet?!

Yoongi gives you a sidelong glance. A soft smile brightens your face, a sublime sight that never graced it during your assiduous encounters. He feels his heart weirdly writhe in his chest, as if it got offended for this lack of consideration toward him after all the pleasure he made you feel for all this months.

“Do you fuck?” He averts your stare before you could notice the wrinkles on his forehead.

“Sometimes,” you merely say, “Someone’s jealous here, I’m flattered,” you add, giggling when a curse escapes from his pouty lips.

“In your dreams!” he tears the box away from your hands, putting it back in its place. “This brand sucks! If I were him, I’d thrust it into your ass if you’d ever gave it to me!” he grabs your wrist and starts dragging your amidst the customers, along the room that he knows like the back of his hand, mumbling how much of a disgrace you are for the music world –with your annoying, airy laugh in the background, ugh! “Here!” he stops in front of a shelf full of last-arrival headphones. “These are great!” He starts rattling off all his knowledge of this topic, from the finest ones to the most comfortable; from the brand he’d buy with closed eyes to the low-quality ones. His fingers meander upon every device lightly, as if they were made of crystal, and words fly out fast, animated by a passion that only the music can emanate.

“You sure know a lot,” you comment, taking advantage of his brief pause.

“It’s my sector. Well, not really…” he scratches his scarlet ear, twiddling with his earrings. “I study composition, I have to do with music every day.”

You tuck some hair behind your ear. “Jimin told me you have your own studio.”

“It’s not mine, I rented it with some friends. And it isn’t properly a studio, it’s more… a sardine can.” He chuckles. “I’d love to become a producer, some day.” He gives you a gummy smile, sinking in your wide, sparkling eyes. But it flips off his face when he actually realizes what he’s just told you: did he really disclose his biggest dream with so much ease? He goes back to watching the headphones, dazed by his own behavior. “I’d buy this, anyway.”

Your stare lingers upon his face, his teeth convulsively munching on the corner of his mouth. Then you lean forward, staring at the prices. “Too expensive.”

“Well, someone who probably gives you some orgasms deserves more than some shoddy earbuds.”

“Yeah, probably. I mean, if he’d give me multiple orgasms like you do, I’d buy it for sure.”

Yoongi turns to you, goggle-eyed and parted lips. He should be shocked by the pureness you use to reveal certain secrets; but he’s even more astonished by the fact that his heart throbs frantically in his ears, loud and hard, muffling every other sound.

“Suga?” a familiar voice breaks through his consciousness, snapping him back down to reality.

He gazes over his shoulder, taking notice of Jin’s tall figure at a few steps from the pair of you. His stare dances from you to him, and when it lands on his hand still holding your wrist, a hint of a malicious smile etches itself on his face.

Yoongi loses his grip as if you were going on fire, rubbing his palm on his baggy jeans. “What are you doing here?”

He laughs, that damn bastard! He’s having the time of his life, seeing him in difficulty! And, anyway… why does Yoongi have the urge to go on the defensive? C’mon, your ‘love-affair’isn’t a secret, all his friends know he fucks you regularly at least four times a week… and yet, he feels as if this thing between you two just cracked.

“I’ve to buy a new plectrum,” he replies, shifting his attention to you, who’s kept silent until now. “Ahm, hello, I’m Seokjin. His best friend.”

“I’m (Y/N), the one he fucks when he’s bored,” you genuinely say, bowing a little, eyes crinkled in the corner.

Despite himself, Yoongi finds himself reddening to the tip of his ears. Despite himself, he finds himself hardly trying to refrain a stupid smile to pull his cheeks up when Seokjin bursts out laughing.

“Listen, Yoongi-chi—“

Yoongi cracks his eyes open, clenches his jaw. “I told you a billion times to not call me like this, you gimme the chills! What a fuckin’ nickname—”

“I go searching for a shop assistant. So I can put an end to your torture.” You graze his arm, with the same delicacy you use to caress his hair when he collapses on you, spent, irregular breath and sparks in his liquid eyes. “It’s been nice to meet you, Seokjin. Have a nice day.” You wave at him before nearing the counter.

Jin observes you walk away, then he goes back to look at Yoongi goggle-eyed. “I can’t believe you fuck a wonder like her, you! You-you don’t deserve someone like her!” he slams his arms on his hips. “Geez, don’t be dumb and date her seriously!”

Yoongi rips his eyes off your amazing butt. “Forget it.”

“If you don’t do it, I swear I’ll ask her out!”

Yoongi chews on his bottom lip, squelching a smile. “Forget it.”

It’s a crappy day. Giant-crappy, actually. You know when everything goes down the pan since the very instant you put a foot out of the bed? Here, Yoongi is going through one of those days: his clock decided to stop working exactly on his exam-day, he stained his jeans with marmalade, he burnt his tongue with hot coffee, he arrived at the class in the nick of time and didn’t answer to half of the questions because his brain decided to go on holiday and he felt the weight of a month of sleepless nights cascade upon his shoulders. On top of that, he missed the bus and started to pelt down as he was on his way home by foot.

So here he is, in front of his door, drenched to bones, chilled… and with tears tugging at his eyelashes. He convulsively gnaws on his bottom lip as he fishes the keys out his pocket. Then, once inside, he bursts out crying, he doesn’t even know exactly why. 

 6 months

He’s nervous, and angry, and frustrated.

A light ‘clack’ coming from the entrance makes him stiffen. He gazes over his shoulder, a chill running down his spine as he sees the door slowly open… great, a thief, the cherry on the cake of his day! But a few seconds later, your figure takes shape beyond the glassy patina in his eyes and for a very infinitesimal instant, the pain gets sucked in a hole  in the pit of his stomach… until he remembers that today is a shitty day and he doesn’t want to see anyone.

Less alone you.

A smile blooms on your face when you notice him. “Oh, Yoongi! I thought you wouldn’t come back—“

With a terse gesture, he takes off his jacket and throws it on the floor, flinging at his feet also his beanie. It’s one of those nights where he feels completely useless and wants to lock himself inside his room, staring at the ceiling and crying himself to sleep—!

“The key is only for the emergencies!” he interrupts, curt.

“It is, in fact. I forgot my laptop with all my notes and—but…” you stop, head tilted to the side. “Are you… crying?”

“What?! I’m not!” He rubs his eyes with his sleeve. “Take what you have to and leave! I wanna stay alone!” He shuffles to his bedroom, and slams the door so powerfully that a pair of your books on his bedside table fall on the ground. He sits on the edge of the bed, shoulders shaking at every stutter breath.

The fuck are you doing here?! Showing up at his place as if it was your own, and without warning him! Ok, this isn’t the first time. It often happens that he comes back home and finds you already here, busy cooking, studying, watching the television… but today it’s another story! Today he isn’t himself—or better, he is someone you’ve never seen before: the one he doesn’t like at all, the fragile guy that let himself devour by his own worries, the one he rarely shows only to his friends… he doesn’t want you to get acquainted with that side of himself he hates with every fiber of his being.

He lowers his head, bites his lower lip to squelch hiccups. Abundant tears roll down his crimson cheeks, falling on his trembling hands. He stiffens when he hears the water running from the bathroom, and his muscles tense all at once when the door opens, revealing your figure; you’re tightening the clothes he threw in the living room a few minutes ago.

He sniffs. “Now you want to use my bathroom?! Fuck off, (Y/N)! This isn’t your home!”

You pause –he can already picture the curve of your lips, your scrunched nose, your brimmed with anger. But then, there’s your light sigh, and your soft steps becoming closer and closer. “It’s for you… a hot bath will do you good.” You put his belongings on the unmade bed, and crouch down before him to take off his shoes and socks. “C’mon, come with me.” You gently take him by the hand and guide him to the bathroom.

You start unbuttoning his shirt, helping him to slide it down his arms. You tuck his vest out his jeans, goosebumps arises on every inch of his skin as your fingertips climb up on his sides, and when you unzip his trousers and your fingers curl around his boxer, a piping hot warmth spreads from his tight chest to the tip of his ears. Yoongi lost counts of how many times you saw him naked, how many times you contemplated him intoxicated by pleasure as he improvised a striptease, your airy chuckle lingering in the air; and yet, there’s something different in the softness of your gestures, or in the way your stare meanders on every tensed line of his bare body.

You’re more delicate, as if you were taking care of a soaked kitten picked up from the street; and no matter how hard he bites, how hard he scratches… you don’t abandon him.

“What happened?” your hands find home on his hip.

He shakes from head to toe. “It’s been a bad day,” he barely whispers.

“This seems more than just a bad day.” You clean his tears with your thumb. “You can talk to me, if you want.”

But Yoongi doesn’t want to talk about it. Not with you. You don’t deal with important issues, you don’t show each other’s fragilities, you don’t cuddle each other’s fears to give you mutual solace. You aren’t a shoulder on which he can lean on to cry, he isn’t a warm embrace in which you can refuge when things seem to slip through your fingers. You aren’t this… intimate. 

He feels the anxiousness pouring from his pounding heart and tugging to his bones, so smothering that he’d like to shove you away. But your lips brush against his scarlet cheek, your thumbs draw circular patterns on his hips and he blesses the moment he gave you a copy of his keys..

He clasps his lips, tears keep rolling down, unstoppable. “You know I’ll have to kill you for seeing me like this.” He sniffs. 

“Uh, you made a joke in your sadness. It means you’re feeling better!”

Yoongi lets out a small chuckle. He feels his heart smashing in his ribcage, and his stomach is twisted.

"Relax now, ok? I’m gonna cook something warm.” You kiss the tip of his nose. “Take all your time.”

The icy-cold that paralyzed him all the while melts only when the door closes. In the silence settling in the small room, as he sinks in the hot water -not as hot as your stare, your hands, or your body- Yoongi feels the tears running down his cheeks once more, until everything placates.

Both pain and throbbing heart.

  He doesn’t know how long it is before he’s finally able to go back to the living room, wrapped in fresh and clean clothes, and welcomed by a good smell of  grilled meat -his favorite. The corners of his mouth quirk up when he glances at your figure, but the smile flips off his face when he takes notice of the table already prepared. Only for one person…

He arches a brow. “Where’s your plate?”

“I’m not eating here. I gotta study, and I think you prefer staying alone.” Your eyes become two sweet half-moons before you recollect your trench-coat and fix your bag around your shoulder. You approach him, tucking some hair behind your ear. “I’m sorry you had a bad day, I’d like to be more helpful.”

“You’ve already done a lot.” Words escape sweetly from his mouth. He runs a hand through his reddish hair, still damp. “I didn’t want you to see me like this. I mean, you’re always so… perfect. It seems like everything is going well for you.”

You look at him goggle-eyed, then you squelch a laugh. “Hey, I have my shitty days too! Ask to Jimin how many times I cried. Like, today I fell two times and my professor turned berserk. He also threatened to replace me with another dancer.” You shrug. “I just try to not let you see it, that’s all. I don’t want to bother you. And about bothering…” you avert his gaze, cheeks red for the embarrassment. “I’m sorry for earlier. You’re right, this is your home, I should’ve called before showing up here.” You pause, staring at his red, puffy eyes. “Well, eat and rest. You’ll see tomorrow will be better.” You give him a light kiss. “Night, Yoongi-chi.”

Yoongi reaches out and grabs your sweater, impeding you to move. He doesn’t know why he does so, if it’s because of the sweetness of that silly nickname or the sense of guilt creeping out his heart, but he isn’t ready to see this bubble of sheer joy explode.

“Have dinner with me,” he whispers.

“I cooked for one,” you reply after a brief moment of astonishment.

“We can share it. And there are lots of things in the fridge, we’ll find a solution.” His stare engulfs into your own. “Stay.”

“No, I–” you lower your stare. “I don’t want to have sex, tonight. It’s been a hell of a day for me too. And tomorrow I gotta go early to the rehearsal.”

“No sex. It’s ok like this… and I can give you a ride, so you can sleep a bit more.” He wraps your hips and pulls you closer, sinking his face into your hair. He inhales sharply through his nose. “I want you to stay.” Voice is muffled as he presses his mouth on the top of your head.

There’s silence, the frantic beat of his heart. Then, your hands, resting on his back, fingers curling around the fabric of his hoodie as your lips softly rest on his neck.

“Ok,” you say with a low voice.

None of the two will ever speak about that tight hug.

Yoongi presses his toes on the carpet of your bedroom, stretching. His heart still races at a noticeably race inside his chest as he searches for his boxer, dazed by the post-orgasm sensation.

“Can I make myself a coffee?” He picks up his boxer from under your dress.

 26 days

“Sure, make yourself at home. You already know where everything is, anyway.” You stretch out to collect your slip.

He puts on his boxer, then he goes back to searching for his clothes; his stare lays on your figure, still half naked, as you wear your hair into a messy bun. 

Yoongi contemplates every line of your body, lower lip clamped between his teeth, as the images of that good, satisfying sex you just had flash before his eyes like movie scenes: the way his mouth slid down your neck to find home on your breast, the slow movements of his tongue around your turgid nipple, his fingers grazing your wet folds as you begged him to stop with these annoying preliminaries. He took you from behind, today. Like, he didn’t plan for it to happen. He just grabbed harder at your buttock and you instantly turned, as if you caught something in the way he touched you.

He shakes his head to swipe away those thoughts, refraining himself from taking you once more on your unmade bed. He takes a quick glimpse at your bedroom, staring at the trophies disposed on a shelf, photographs of you dancing some classical ballet music, working out to the bar, you standing on your toes, a small child with makeup on and a beaming smile…

You seem to belong to a different planet. It’s enough to look at his worn out jeans and at your bandaged toes to think that those like you, usually, don’t look at the guys like him.

“Why me? At the party, I mean…” that question, running through his head for quite some time now, escapes from his mouth before he could stop it.

Yoongi never felt so in control like tonight. He held on firmly to your hips as he pulled himself inside of you, looking at the graceful curve of your back as he thrusted slower and deeper, setting the pace, your light moans like a melody shattering the silence. It didn’t take him much to come, but it must admit it’s been a while since he’s reached his climax with so much intensity, to the point he could feel his legs shaking as your warm, slick walls squirmed around him–!

“You were the only Batman around. A perfect match for Catwoman.”

He knits a brow. “So you chose me for my ridiculous suit.”

“That. And the fact that you kept staring at me.” You turn. “I bet my beauty spellbound you!”

“No, just your ass. And you’re pretty bitchy, anyway. This is the last time I fucked you.”

“You said it also two days ago. And last week too.” You pick up his shirt. “I start thinking you don’t really mean that.” You near him, an amused smile dances across your features as you hand out his garment. “Why were you there, instead? Jimin told me you hate parties.”

He takes the shirt, wearing it. “He had to introduce me to one of his classmates. Chanri-something, a bore.”

"Chanri is one of the best dancers I know. And she’s beautiful.”

He pokes his tongue on the cheek, scrutinizing the expression of expectation dawning on your face. “If you think I’ll tell you that I chose you because you were beautiful, you’re dead wrong.”

You chuckle. “Then, why?”

He shrugs before disappearing in the kitchen. “Because you kept staring at me and you were available, what else?”

Yoongi never gave a damn about ballet.

He doesn’t understand shit, it seems like watching a bunch of idiots wearing tights flutter around on their toes -as much as it seems to you to see a bunch of idiots running behind a ball when Yoongi watches basketball. But as matter of fact, he likes classical music, he likes that Jimin was chosen as main dancer for the 'Swan Lake’, and he likes that his friend keeps inviting him to his shows despite his complaints, aware that he’ll probably fall asleep after five minutes.

 7 months 9 days

What he likes less, though, it’s discovering that you are here too. No, not amidst the ocean of heads in the audience… but on that stage, dancing as 'Odette’.

Unable to take his eyes off your figure moving with gracefulness as if you were a leaf carried by the wind, Yoongi felt something akin to rage brewing in his stomach.

Why the hell didn’t you tell him anything about it?

C'mon, you had so many occasions! When you woke up with your face on his chest, when you escaped from his tight embrace and took off his shirt you use as pajama before taking a shower; when he gave you a kiss on the top of your damp head before shuffling to the kitchen and make you breakfast; when you spent the whole morning talking about Namjoon, how he lost the ring he bought to Hyerin, as you were cuddling up on his sofa; or when he gave you a ride to the university and gave you a long kiss before meeting up with Jungkook, to help him to finish a project.

Days, weeks, months in which you could’ve said: “Would you like to come to my show?”

He waits in a corner, hands clenched into fists inside his pockets, feeling like a fish out of water surrounded by people dressed to the nines -while he showed up with a sweater, ugh.

But you suddenly turn, take notice of him among many, and you approach him as if nobody else was in that room.

Sheer surprise dances across your features, and it melts in the beaming smile you’re delivering him, closing the gap between the pair of you. Despite the rage, he can’t help but think that you’re pretty divine with your makeup on, hair still worn in a chignon, and eyes full of galaxies.

The disappointment pouring out his heart spreads to his eyes, now fixed on your figure tightened in the arms of a pair of dancers busy complimenting you. You pay attention to not smash against your chest the huge bouquet of flowers you received once finished, under a cascade of thundering applause, while you make your way through the people crowding offstage.

You always look at him like this, as if you were staring at the Earth from space…

“Hi… I didn’t think you would’ve come,” you start.

”Jimin invited me.“ He runs his tongue on his front teeth, delivering you a caustic glance.

You seem to catch the delusion swimming in his eyes, because you immediately lower your head. "Sorry, I wanted to tell you but… you hate ballet. You hate it so much I wanted to spare you this torture.” You lightly chuckle. 

In a heartbeat, all the rage simmered until now vanishes. There’s only you, your genuine smile, your shining eyes, your scarlet cheeks, and Yoongi doesn’t feel like ruining the bliss of this very moment.

He doesn’t have the heart to shatter your happiness.

“I do. But I’ll probably come the next time, because I had fun. And because you, well–” he moistens his lips, scratching the back of his crimson ear. “You were amazing, up there. A work of art. Seeing you dance, I don’t know… I can’t miss it for anything in this world.”

Your hands curl more around the bouquet. Your lips are parted, your eyes are big, you seem genuinely surprised by his compliment. The very first one in months. Because he isn’t the type to say sappy things, even when he can feel them jump on the tip of his tongue. And he’s almost certain that he’ll write a song, once back home; about you and how you were air on that stage, how beautiful your face is even when a few tears roll down your cheekbones.

You instantly clean them. "Sorry, sorry, I’m so emotional tonight. I’m embarrassing.” You squelch a laugh, taking your hand on your mouth. “But thank you, Yoongi-chi. It feels like a dream, told by you.”

There’s something, resting at the bottom of his heart.

Something akin to joy. Something vague, with no shape, that touches his soul and makes him smile as you wrap your arms around his neck and he pulls you closer, caressing your back. It’s something that pinches him, makes him laugh, and makes him want to spend all the night on your lips, now pressed against his own.

Something that Yoongi never felt before, not even with one of the girls who previously grazed his existence, and that’s probably the reason why he can’t give it a name.

But he likes it. And he likes that he’s feeling it with you.

You always lift your left leg, when you’re about to come. You curl it around his waist, and curl your toes so tight that your muscles tense. Your hands grip at his shoulders, or his damp hair, you pull it so hard he can feel his skin tingling.

You always cling to him, running out of breath, begging him to go faster, to go deeper.

 4 months 15 days

Yoongi finds all of this pretty exciting.

He sets the pace, you follow the rhythm of his pelvis colliding against yours as if you were dancing on your favorite song. He moves inside of you without taking his sparkling eyes off your scarlet face, feeling the pleasure climbing up to his brain, fogging it. He tries hard to hold at that grain of lucidity that’s left, as his cock gets squirmed between your contracting walls, but it’s not really that easy if he keeps sinking in your dilated pupils.

He bites his bottom lip, plumper for the kisses, increasing the pace of his thrusts. He stands on his elbows and leans forward. “I’m about to come–ah, (Y/N)–!” The tip of his cock grazes your deepest part and he can tell by the way you moan, mouth to mouth, that he’s finally reached that sensitive part that will make you lose yourself into his arms.

Your walls squirm around him harder, convulsively, as you arch your back more and curl your legs around his waist. Your orgasm is intense, so much that you can barely contain your voice. You tilt your head back, and Yoongi’s mouth finds home on your neck as he finally comes, legs trembling as he releases himself inside of you with a rocky groan.

He slows down the pace of his thrusts, your feet grazing on his legs as you finally unwrap him from your tight, warm embrace. He stays there, trying hard to not weigh on you.

There are his own pants, your stuttered breath. The frantic beating of his heart that’s dazzling him, throbbing against your chest that rises up and down fast. There’s one of his numerous songs playing on his pc, music he loves and that accompanied every second of that long, lazy sex you had on his studio sofa.

He cracks his eyes open, realizing where you actually are. You’re the first one he takes to his workplace. This is his small world he’s building little by little with the few money he saved, his sanctuary on Earth… This place is too important to let a fleeting soul in.

“So you work here,” you suddenly say with a sleepy voice, caressing his hair. “It’s nice, I like it. It’s way more comfortable than your car.” You smirk. “I’m almost honored, you told me you never bring any girl here.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he replies, a smile etches itself on his face. He closes his eyes, moves to find the right position as he still stays above you, still inside of you. His legs entwine with your own. “Five minutes and I’ll take you home.”

“I can take a taxi. Or the metro.” You kiss his shoulder.

But this was an emergency: Seokjin asked him if he could use his place to have a nice dinner with a cute classmate, your roomie is half-died on the bed for the fever, and he’s fucking sick of doing it on the backseat of his car. 

He frowns. “Are you joking? I won’t let you go alone at this hour.”

“Aw, now I’m flattering myself!” Your lips brush against his damp hair. “Are you receiving many requests, anyway? Like… Do you already have some clients?”

He shakes his head. “Just some friends. Or some classmates, nothing serious.” He presses his ear more on your breast. “Dunno if this thing will take off, but I like it. I… don’t know what I’d do without music, I’m not really good at anything,” he confesses, staring at his desk full of music equipment.

“Never thought about a porn-star career? I’d recommend you.”

Yoongi lets out a rocky laugh. Then, when a new song starts playing, he lifts his head up like an animal that sensed danger. “Oh shit!” He jumps down the sofa and nears the pc, pushing the stop button. He can feel his heart throbbing in his throat, while a flush spreads all over his face.

He can’t let you hear it. This isn’t a normal song… this is his song. Something he wrote when he couldn’t sleep, a bunch of notes in which you can clearly see a piece of himself.

“Why did you turn it off? It seemed nice.” You huff. “C'mon, put it back!”

“No! I wrote it, it’s embarrassing… I don’t want you to hear it,“ he admits, his muscles tens all at once as your stare bores through his skin. He gazes over his shoulder, notices the curiosity dancing across your features, until something else catches his attention. You. Just you. You’re naked, curled up on his leather sofa with your crossed arms as a pillow, an encouraging smile pulling up your red cheeks, and for a brief moment he finds you breathtaking like a sculpture. He always paid little attention to how beautiful you’re indeed, but his brain seems now unable to let this thought go, as he sizes you up, munching the corner of his mouth.

"It was for a noona’s project, she wanted me to arrange everything. I… never let anyone hear it. It’s personal.”

“Uh, I see… I swear I won’t flatter myself. Not too much, at least,” you say, after a brief pause. “Hey, you once told me you wanted to be a great producer, hearing your songs on the radio while you’re on the subway, in a bar… you can start from here. I’ll be your audience.” you add, softly.

Yoongi snorts a laugh, shaking his head lightly. He stares at the screen and after a few seconds of hesitation, he pushes play.

“What’s the name?”

“Suran. You should listen to her, her voice’s outstanding! I didn’t sleep at all when she asked me to compose a song for one of her projects and—“ he interrupts, hit by your airy laugh lingering in the air.

“I meant the song.”

“Ah… Wine.” He scratches his nape, catches a deep breath, and finally turns. The awkwardness for hearing his own song playing for an 'audience’ gets replaced by another kind of embarrassment. Something that has to do with him, standing naked in the middle of the studio, with his dick still wet; and you, looking at him with half-closed eyes. It's… satisfying, and beautiful, it makes him feel tremendously sexy in a body he doesn’t like much.

Namjoon once told him that eyes speak louder than words, sometimes. He never believed him, until today… it feels like you’re screaming that he’s the most handsome man who’s ever walked in your life.

Yoongi swallows hard and finally approaches you, as you make him some room on the sofa. He lays down and you hover over him, crossing your arms on his chest and resting your cheek on them, enraptured by the melody. Yoongi stiffens, at first, but the more the seconds elapse, the more his muscles relax. He places a hand under his head and the other on your shoulder, drawing lazy doodles on your skin.

“Did you fuck her?” you ask with a low voice, genuine, as if you’ve just asked him to buy some milk.

“I don’t fuck those I respect too much.“

You turn, wide eyes and hardened features. There’s no trace of rage, or disappointment dancing across them… but he can read in your irises that something cracked in the moment he said those few words. 

He shouldn’t care. He’s so used to saying whatever whirls in his mind to not care about the consequences; and yet, with you, he feels guilty for saying something like this.

For even thinking about it…

You stare back at him, hard and long, before resting once again your cheek on his chest.

He racks his brain frantically to find a good topic that could swipe away this thick air between the pair of you. “You… what do you do, exactly?” he manages to ask, the anxiousness grips at his heart as the silence grows bigger. “I mean… Why did you decide to become a ballerina? Like, Jimin says that it’s like breathing to him so—“

You lightly chuckle, interrupting him. “I've been studying ballet since I was very little, it’s the reason that makes me wake up in the morning. I’d love to become a teacher, some day.” You curl more in his one-arm embrace. “Actually… My dream is to be accepted at the Universal Ballet, but the auditions are hard. Every time I’m about to try, I give up. They would never choose me…”

Yoongi stares at the ceiling, recognizing a bit of himself in your words. “How could you know? It's bullshit, you didn’t even try yet.” His fingertips slide up your nape, run through your hair. “Jimin says you’re talented.”

“Chimchim is my friend, he’s obliged to say it. It’s in the unwritten-friendship-code.”

Something pinches his stomach, when his brain assimilates that nickname. He curls his lips and nose. Imperceptibly, but he does. “You give dumb nicknames to everybody, don’t you?”

“Only to the ones I respect the most.” You turn, the left corner of your mouth pulled up. Then, your eyes get softer, the curve of your lips turns sweeter. "Yoongi-chi? You’ll see this thing, the studio and all… it’ll work amazingly. Your songs are beautiful, don’t be ashamed of them.”

  After sex, Yoongi is one of those guys who lights a cigarette and smokes in bed, staring at the ceiling. This, if he was a smoker, obviously. But he hates smoking so he usually turns on the on other side, spent, hearing the water running as his last fuck takes a shower before going away while he’s asleep. On other occasions, instead, he collects his clothes and disappears before that delicious silence could be broken by uncomfortable questions, leaving the girl wrapped in crumbled sheets.

Whatever it is, he leaves or lets them leave.

But that Friday night, Yoongi doesn’t let you go.

Just like he didn’t the last Wednesday night, or that Thursday of two weeks ago, or many, many other times before…

He always found it pretty pathetic and embarrassing the way Namjoon still observes Hyerin as if flowers bloomed at every step she takes.

But after the third beer, Yoongi can’t help but watch him and feel an abyss open in the pit of his stomach. He stares at the sparks in his eyes, the dimples appearing on his cheeks as he sweetly smiles, the way his hand tucks some of her hair behind her ear, the vivid interest that crawls in his brown irises when she talks.

 1 year 3 months

It’s a loving-look too intense for someone who stays with the same person for three years now…

“How can you still look at her like this, after all this time?” Yoongi looks at Hyerin’s retracting figure, approaching the bar to take another cocktail. 

Namjoon furrows. “What are you talking about? You have the same look when you stare at (Y/N),” he analyses, confused.

Yoongi scrunches his nose. “I don’t.”

His friend holds his stare, then he shrugs. “Sure, you don’t…” he doesn’t go further, changing topic instead. “So, (Y/N) won’t come?”

He shakes his head. “She’s still having dinner.” He pokes his tongue on his cheek. “She’s with the dancer dude, Hose-something. He came back from his tour or whatever bullshit.” He throws a glance at his phone. On the screen, there’s your Instagram page open: more than three hours ago, you posted a selfie picturing you and your friend wrapped into a tight hug, both smiling, both too much happy. 

And his already-shitty mood ended up six feet under.

“Hey, it’s normal for you to be jealous. I would be too if someone would ask my girlfriend out for dinner—“

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Yoongi retorts with a low voice, like a script that repeats itself over and over.

Yoongi should yell “Absolutely not!” as he usually does, flip the table over, toss his glass of beer at him and run away. He should react as he used to do during these heart-to-heart chats. However, this time he stays silent.

He thinks a lot about it, seriously, and then says, “No, don’t think so…” he scratches his head, sighing. “I mean… how do you understand it?”

Joonie shrugs. “I think it’s different for anyone. The way I love Hyerin will never be the same way you love (Y/N).“ His friend casts a glance upon his girlfriend. “I can’t see myself without her. I don’t know if we’ll ever live together, if we’ll get married… but I’m sure I want her to be a part of my life.” He rests his chin on his hand, smiling. “The future seems so dull and boring without her.”

“But… you love her, don’t you?”

Yoongi rarely thinks about the future. It makes him anxious, that sense of uncertainty that could not match with the expectations he built throughout all these years. 

But at the question: “How do you see yourself in ten years?”, he always imagined himself on his own; a billionaire living in a giant loft, a successful producer whose songs climb the world rankings, whose fame flies from mouth to mouth at the same rate as his heart beats in his chest when you are there, into his arms, while you’re taking a bath and talk about your day; when you hug him from behind as he sits at his desk, working on some songs; when you are having sex and he thinks he wants to make it only with you.

Will you still be here, in ten years?

Ten years is a very long time, and he gets bored easily, or feels smothered. He never lived with anyone, he never was so viscerally in love with someone to tell them: “Take my keys, use them whenever you want”—but he gave you his keys, actually. It’s been natural, just like picking you up from your rehearsals or inviting you to eat something at his studio. Yeah, he can actually see you into his home: your clothes piled up on his, your dancing-shoes next his Nike; you reading a book on his bed as he works on his laptop, or you showing up at his studio with some hot coffee, fresh clothes, and shampoo to make sure he’s doing fine; or him buying you some flowers after your show and you hugging him as if he’s just taking you on the moon.

Ten years as good as the one you’re already living…

The vibration of his phone distracts him from his thoughts. You sent him a message, asking him if you could spend the night at his place, and Yoongi answers back with a simple ”Sure“, without even thinking.

In that moment, he gets hit by the realization that the small smile blooming on his face when it comes to you, isn’t so different from the one that Joonie is now delivering to Hyeri.

Yoongi doesn’t love you. For sure, that explosion of affection he feels only by thinking of you can’t be called love. But it’s there, and it’s different from all the other emotions.

And he’s aware that it was good even when he was alone, with his music, his dreams… and an empty home. C'mon, it’s not so bad to go back home and be welcomed by silence. Even if the one that settles upon you when you’re there, and you hug him tight, it’s of another kind.

Silence is good, silence does him good… but he wouldn’t mind if you’d still fill it with your presence, within ten years.

Yoongi is sure about three things in this world:

1) Namjoon will lose the rings on his wedding day;

 1 year 10 days

2) the music world will die when Epik High will disband;

3) you’re standing on his doorstep at 3:00 AM. Clearly drunk.

He immediately notices when you are: a stupid smile runs from cheek to cheek, you swing from a foot to another, and you can’t control your voice tone.

"Do you know what time it is?”

“Late. Or early.” You giggle. “Did I wake you up?” You ask–well, shout…

“Lower your voice, geez.” He grabs your wrist and drags you inside, closing the door behind his shoulder. He leans against the wooden surface, crossed arms and knitted brows. “And who would ever sleep at three am on a Thursday morning? I don’t have to wake up early for an exam, not really,” he says, surly. And yet, you laugh as if he’s told you a joke. He sighs. “What are you doing here?”

You tap your fingers on your temples, as if your brain was recollecting all the thoughts. “Today we had the auditions for The Nutcracker and we went to celebrate. Actually, I didn’t even pass them, but Byeol did, so I went and pretended I was happy for her.” You giggle. “I was having fun, but then I couldn’t take it anymore… so I went away.” Your smile shakes, as much as your eyes do.

Yoongi feels a strange vibration brewing in his mind: rage, he distinguishes it clearly… but he can’t tell why he’s feeling it now, with you. Maybe because you showed up here without warning, waking him up. Or, maybe, because he didn’t even know you had an audition.

“You could’ve come home.”

“But you’re here,” you merely say, “I didn’t want to stay alone, I… wanted to see you.”

He pokes his tongue on his cheek. “Really? You didn’t even tell me about this Nutcracker bullshit.”

“Hey, slow down…” he rests his hands on your hips and closes the gap between the pair of you, placing a long kiss on your forehead. “You aren’t a failure. Did you hear me? You aren’t.” He brushes some hair away from your face. “You’ll have many other occasions, they’ll notice you someday 'cause you’re a wonderful dancer. It’s all right, (Y/N). Shh, don’t cry… it’s all right.” Another kiss on your forehead, on the tip of your nose… soft touches, light like butterflies, that sketch every inch of your scarlet face.

“I-I trained so hard, I always do. But it wasn’t enough.” You sniff, your breath stutters as you hug him back. “I’m tired, and I’m hungry. And I’m sleepy and my feet hurt. And I wanted to see you, I… I want to stay with you, Yoongi-chi. Always, a lot, and long.”

Yoongi sinks in that sadness made of hiccups and tears and hands curling around his shirt.

You lower your stare. “I didn’t tell anybody. Nor to Jimin, nor to my parents… I feel under pressure, if people know about my auditions. They get excited, and they put so much expectation on me. ”How are you feeling? You’ll do amazingly! You’re so talented!“ But I’m not and if I don’t pass it they’ll be disappointed—“ your words, slurred and brimmed with sadness, hit him like a sudden wave. "I-I trained hard every day for four months for the Sugarplum fairy part, and I wasn’t even chosen to be a Snowflake. T-they told me my technique may be perfect but it’s useless if I can’t convey anything. Nothing at all.” You huff, cleaning your tears. “F-forgive me, I should’ve told you. But then you’d see me as a failure and you’d pity me and I hate when you do—“

He cups your face and seals your lips with his own. Once. Twice, thrice… he kisses you softly, slowly, as if in this way he could swipe away your sorrow. 

Your words whirl into his mind; a confession that dazes him because this is the first time that you seem to really need him.

As if he was the only one who could make you feel better…

“It’s ok, (Y/N). Stay…” his fingers meander through your hair, his mouth lays on your ear. “I… can make you a hot bath. And something to eat. Ok?” He inches away, cleans your cheeks with his thumbs and delivers you a small, sweet smile. Then he takes you by the hand. “Come with me.”

  Yoongi has an exam. He should fly out the door and run to the university, review his notes… and yet, he can’t move a single muscle. He stands beside the bed, watching you curled up under his sheets. He’d like to stay here with you all day long, make sure you’re feeling well, take care of you; but the last alarm clock is ringing, warning him that he must go if he wants to arrive on time.

He snaps back down to reality when you stretch your legs, fixing your bleary, puffy eyes on his face. He huffs, fixes his beanie on his mint hair -you told him you love this color, it suits him divinely. He’s thinking of keeping it a bit more- and rests a knee on the edge of the bed to bend over you. He sinks his face in the crook of your neck and you put your arms around his shoulders, whispering, “Good morning.”

“Morning…” his lips slide up on your jawline, finding home on your ear. “As soon as I finish the exam, I come back home. You… can stay here, if you want.” Reluctantly, he pulls away, sinks into your sparkling eyes and stumbles on your tender smile. He gives you a light kiss, then he walks away from that warm embrace.

Yoongi thinks about that night a lot. At your hiccups, at your tears, at your shame. How he held you tight while lying in the bath, your ear pressed against his chest and his lips brushing against your hair; how you seemed so small as he dried your hair with a towel, cleaned your makeup and helped you to wear one of his hoodies. How he couldn’t refrain from a small smile brimmed with tenderness to bloom while watching you devour the ramen he cooked for you. How he spooned you once in his bed, and you thanked him, and you told him you were feeling a bit better.

He never saw you like this, you made him feel impotent.

But then he thinks about your smile, your words, that “I want to stay with you” that scratched the back of his mind during the exam. And when he comes back home and finds you there, sprawled on his sofa, hearing the songs he wrote, and you question him about his exam with a beaming smile, Yoongi thinks he wants to stay with you too.

Always, a lot, and long.

    1 months 16 days

Small moments.

There are small moments that make him hope that this thing between you two doesn’t end soon: furtive kisses on the balcony during a boring party, the ringing in the middle of the night after he called you; the way his name escapes from your mouth when he thrusts hard inside of you, the slow sex on your carpet, a quickie on his desk, the scratches on the skin, the bites, fucking as you weren’t seeing each other for ages and then leave with no promises; or the lazy and superb blowjobs you give him without him asking for them…

Tonight, it’s one of those moments.

He sits in the backseat of his car, some rap music in the background, his legs spread and your head between them. You’re going slow, take your time, a present as good as any for accompanying you to the cinema. Your fingers are curled gently around his hard length, your warm mouth is wrapping the head, and your tongue is swirling over it, making him lose track of where he is and who he is.

A few, soft touches and the pre-cum is already glistening at the top of his cock. 

A few, soft touches and his back is already arching, eyes rolling in pleasure, his moans already filling the air.

He rests his hand on your hair, grips at it harder when your tongue gives light darts just under his head, while your hand starts moving up and down, quickening the pace gradually. Your other hand finds his balls and pulls gently on them, as your tongue continues its movements.

Geez, this is a blowjob that makes him see the Milky way…

Yoongi opens his eyes, stare fixed on the roof. He’d like to lower it but the last time he did -it was your third encounter, at your place, in your shower- he came immediately. No, really, he couldn’t hold himself back. You were there, staring back at him with no sense of shame as your pretty lips gently wrapped him, and he lost every grain of lucidity on your dilated pupils. He released himself inside your throat, groaning loud, relishing the sight of you swallowing to the last drop without ripping your eyes off his face.

You left him so satisfied that he didn’t feel any desire to empty his balls for three days -he wonders who might have been your teacher, because you’re pretty talented.

He thinks there’s nothing better. As his chest rises up and down fast, as his breath gets heavy and frantic, as he feels his dick brushing against your palm as he wobbles his pelvis, Yoongi thinks he’d love for his love life to be made only of glorious blowjobs and dreamlike fucks: no frills, no compliments, no sweet nothings, no cuddles before or after sex.

Just two people enjoying each other’s body heat.

He wonders if it’s the same also for you, as you inch away to take some breath, because it’s more than a month that you meet assiduously but you never made things clear. You don’t seem to want anything from him, but things usually tend to escalate quickly and he finds himself caught in a relationship he wasn’t searching for in the first place.

“W-what’s this?” He asks, casting a glance upon you.

You lick some precum away from the tip. “A blowjob…?”

He lightly chuckles. “No, I meant… this thing between us.” He pulls his hair back, swallowing hard. “I don’t want things to change. Grow. Whatever. This isn’t serious, is it?”

You arch your brows. “No… unless a blowjob wasn’t a marriage proposal.”

Yoongi laughs again, moistens his lips plump for the bites. “I… don’t want it to be serious. It’s ok as it is.” His stare engulfs into yours, there’s a strange glint crawling into them.

You lower your head, your hand gently moves to not let it become limp. “Would it be so terrible if it became serious?”

“No, not terrible… but it’s not what I want.” He runs his fingers through your hair. “Relationships are a mess. And they hurt. I-I’m not cut for them. I’d make you suffer, I get bored easily. I… want to focus on my music, my projects. There’s no room for anyone else.”

“Same here. I want to focus on my career too.”

“No, because girls always agree with me, but then they want more and—“

“It’s ok, no strings attached. It’s ok by me… now, can I make you come? It’s late, I’m tired, I have an exam tomorrow and my mouth hurts.”

Yoongi tilts his head back and lets out a throaty laugh. He closes his eyes, sighs when you wrap him again with your warm mouth and start sucking, quickening the pace.

He prays that things will stay simple like this forever.

It’s strange how relationships slowly built in months, years, could crumble with so much ease in a bunch of minutes, in a bunch of words.

Few, infinitesimal instants, and everything that has been between two people becomes one of those memories that scratch the back of your mind when you’re a bit drunk, when the nostalgia catches you off guard; when, simply, you realize that  an important piece of your life just detached.

 1 year 6 months

Few, infinitesimal instants, and the heart shatters in pieces so minuscule you wonder if it can be patched up. And, in a sense, you can do it but it’s not the same anymore.

It’s been days Yoongi is trying, but it’s useless. A patch here, a patch there; a stitch here, a stitch there… but every time your image suddenly emerges –while writing a song, while eating, while sleeping- his heart beats noticeably harder than usual and it immediately bleeds, screwing everything up.

How could he arrive at this point? To lay on the leather couch of his studio, staring at the ceiling, eyes swollen with tears and the heart bursting with sorrow, facing one the most excruciating break-ups of his love life. Because you two broke up, didn’t you?

When the fuck did you become something?

You two were supposed to have fun, put an end to this thing as soon as you’d grow bored of each other…

Why did he let everything take this sudden turn?

Yoongi doesn’t know. He only knows you fought like animals. He shouted so loud that a vein appeared on his scarlet neck, you yelled so loud that your temple started pulsing. You hurled every possible, mean word at each other, walking around the room like two wild beasts that scan each other’s movements, keeping themselves at a distance.

He isn’t the type to put up a fight, he tends to avoid discussions, waiting for things to calm down naturally. The fact is that you yelled something like: “You should be happy for me!” and it made his blood boil.

He vibrated from head to toes, as the rage sucked in every ounce of lucidity. How could he be happy for you? What about his happiness?

Everything started normally, peacefully.

He woke up beside you, curled up in a routine that smoothly proceeds for more than a year now; you kissed him on his doorstep, promising him you’d cooked because Jin taught you a new recipe you couldn’t wait to try; he texted you he’d be a bit late, because Jungkook asked him some help on a video he was editing, but that he wouldn’t have missed your dinner for anything in this world; on the way back home, Jimin told him you were admitted to the Universal Ballet and Yoongi saw his whole world crush down.

Jimin already knew it for two weeks… but he didn’t, you didn’t tell him shit.

He should’ve done just like he always does on these occasions: shrug and move on. He would come back home, he’d fuck you one last time on his sofa and you’d both go your separate ways. But when he opened the door and saw you there, making dinner, beautiful and happy as you always are, he couldn’t turn a blind eye.

Are you still at his place? Who knows how you feel. He treated you so badly… 

Geez, a week has already passed and still he feels awful. In the back of his eyelids, he can’t still see the exact moment in which he broke your heart, the expression of sadness and astonishment when he started spitting words, the way you hardly tried to keep tears at bay as you retorted to every single insult.

He rubs his puffy red eyes with his index finger and thumb when a light knock of the door breaks through his consciousness. Reluctantly, he puts himself into a stretched position and presses his bare feet on the floor, feeling dizzy. He runs a hand through his rough bluish hair and rests his other hand on his stomach, kicking the clothes and empty takeaway boxes he meets along his short way to the door.

Yoongi can’t clearly remember what he told you. He attacked you, without caring about the consequences. He probably told you: “It was better when you were just a fuck! Fuck off you and your fuckin’ ballet!”, and probably added: “I bet that Hoseok-dude is waiting for you with spread legs! Why don’t you go to him? You’re good for nothing but to empty someone’s balls” and finally said: “I regret the day I met you. Fuck off Jimin and his fuckin’ parties! And fuck off you! Bring your things, I don’t wanna find you here when I’ll be back.”

Tightening the handle, he expects to see Joonie’s dimples, on the other side; or Jin’s somber gaze, or Jimin’s sweet smile, or Kookie’s big eyes… for sure, he wasn’t expecting to actually find you.

His heart skips a beat, as soon as his brain takes notice of your figure, and it lurches into his ribcage before starting to throb at a frenetic rate. You’re as tired and sad as him. You’ve bags under your eyes, teary and swollen, your fingers curl around your bag, and your teeth bite convulsively your bottom lip.

He pokes his tongue on his cheek, scrutinizing the expression of embarrassment dancing across your features. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see you. Talk to you.” You catch a breath, staring at your toes. “It’s been days since I came here, but I always end up going away. I-I lack courage to face you… but Jin told me you aren’t eating properly, you aren’t sleeping, you’re always angry and I—“ you interrupt, shifting your stare to his face. "It’s been almost a week since you came home and I’m so worried I can’t sleep…” you keep biting your bottom lip to keep tears at bay. “How are you feeling, Yoongi-chi?” Your voice cracks, but still that nickname is brimmed with sheer tenderness and sweetness, as if you forgot that once you were mad at him.

As if you forgot he practically told you you were good only to open your legs…

Guilt creeps out his heart, making him avert your gaze. “Disappointed, pissed. Disappointed, mostly.” He clenches his fists. “Why didn’t you tell me anything?” he knits his brows. "You’re about to live your biggest dream, and I had to find out from Jimin.” It’s a barely whispered hush, but it hits you as if he’s just yelled at the top of his lungs. “I felt cut out of your life.”

You pause, tucking some hair behind your ear. “I was about to tell you. Every day. Like, that night we couldn’t sleep so we took a walk on the Han River. Or that day I cried on the phone because my teacher yelled at me and you came back early from work to cook me dinner. O-or when we made it in your shower and then you told me if I wanted to come to your studio because you wanted me to listen to some new songs you composed, or after my shows… I wanted to tell you, whenever I was happy but… I panicked, because I knew I was about to lose all of this. You.” The first tears tugged at your eyelashes roll down but you immediately clean them with your hand. “Being accepted into the Universal Ballet has always been my dream and when they asked me if I wanted to join them, I was about to say no.” Your hands curl so hard that your knuckles become white. “I was about to give up my dream for a guy. For you. And I couldn’t do this to myself, I worked hard for this, I have my own projects… so I accepted. But believe me, it kills me to not see you for a year because I love you, Yoongi-chi.” You cover your mouth with your hands, wide stare and shaky shoulders. “Oh damn, I love you so much. But I love ballet too. And I want to go to the Universal Ballet, but I also want to stay with you—” words falter and die in the back of your throat, when you get caught in his warm embrace.

The majority of the girls who graced his existence confessed their love for him, at a certain point. But this the first time he actually feels something. Something akin to happiness, a Supernova explosion that produces a burning warmth, a shock wave that swipes away all the rage that kept him away from you for all this time.

He never hugged you so tight, but he’s damn scared you might vanish in thin air if he’d only loosen the grip. 

Your voice is muffled against his shoulder, but he can clearly hear you say “I love you” over, and over, and over…

He’d like to tell you back, that he loves you, but those three little words don’t want to fly out. This isn’t the right moment, probably.

Your fingers curl around his sweater. “There hasn’t been anyone after you.” You pull away, staring at him. “As if. I don’t want anyone else but you.”

“I know…” he sighs. “Forgive me. For all the things I said. I’m a dickhead and I was mad and–“ he cups your face, leaning his forehead on yours. "Jin was right: I don’t deserve you,” he whispers, sinking in your liquid eyes. “But I’ll try to make things work, even if you aren’t here… I’ll wait. I promise, (Y/N). You’ll find me here when you're back.” He brushes some hair away from your face.

You munch the corner of your mouth before placing a long kiss on his lips. Yoongi inhales sharply through his nose, runs a hand through your hair while the other searches for yours, fingers intertwined. He doesn’t know how long it is before he’s finally able to inch away from, breathing on your parted lips, lost in your eyes full of stars.

“It didn’t have to go this way. It had to be a game…” he whispers.

You kiss him lightly. Once, twice, thrice. “Would you like to turn back time?”

Yoongi’s stare engulfs into yours. He thinks that a year away from you will pass in a heartbeat, if compared to a whole life with you. “No.” He dimly smiles. “It’s more than ok like this.”

Small moments.

There are small moments that make him hope that this thing between you two could last forever: coming back home and finding you asleep on his sofa, hug you tight and sink his head in the crook of your neck; your fingers running through his hair, your stare brimmed with love while he’s writing or explaining you one of the new equipment he bought; preparing a warm bath and lay there, hugged and naked; helping you to bandage your toes and cuddle you when you’re upset. You, taking him by the hand and obliging him to dance while you’re cooking, his laughter filling the air, his huge smile running from cheek to cheek.

 2 years 2 months

Five months have passed since you greeted him at the airport, and Yoongi cherishes only some memories, replaying them in his mind when your absence smothers him.

Tonight, it’s one of those nights.

Yoongi rarely gets drunk, only on very special occasions. And being chosen to produce the new XXX’s album, a group he saw grow with his own eyes when he still was a college student full of dreams, it’s definitive a good reason to go out celebrating together with his best friends and guzzle down an entire bottle of wine.

He stumbled on his feet a couple of times before reaching his bedroom. He plops down on the bed, pressing his face on the mattress and curls his fingers around the crumbles sheets on your side. It’s empty, cold, still made. He lifts his head up a bit, enough to catch a glimpse of it with his bleary liquid eyes.

He tightens the grips around the fabric, the knuckles already white.

When the fuck are you coming back?

He misses everything about you.

Fumbling around, he fishes his phone out the back pocket of his jeans. He dials the first numbers of your phone, stopping before he could digit the last one. His mind is vacant as if a typhoon passed and swiped away every tiny thought, but he’s pretty sure that words will fly out naturally the moment he’ll finally hear your voice. He thinks. He hopes. He sighs, finally pushing the last number. His heart flip-flops at every ring, and it placates only when he hear your voicemail asking to wait for the *beep* before talking.

He coughs when the sound announces his turn to speak.

“(Y/N)? It’s me, Yoongi-chi, ya know, your… boyfriend, I think? C'mon, the one who fucked you on his table before you departed. Mh, I should throw it away, it reminds me of you. Ugh, everything reminds me of you here.“ His voice is slurry. "And I’m drunk, because your voicemail is talking with the new producer of XXX and I wanted you to know that I’m happy. And that I miss you. I miss you more than I love you, right now.” His eyes get swollen with tears, his lips tremble. “I love you, I think, I know… I feel it right into my bones. And if I’d ever be able to turn back time, I’d go back to that balcony a billion times again, only to meet you.” He rubs a sleeve on his eyes. “Come back home soon, (Y/N).”

  10 days

[Y/N]: I was wondering if you’d like to redo that thing you did with your tongue the other day

[Yoongi]: I thought you didn’t like me so much

[Y/N]: Indeed. I like your tongue better

[Yoongi]: you ain’t that great too

[Y/N]: you’re so touchy o(TヘTo)

If it can make ya feel better, I really like your dick.

It’s meek, it does what I want, and never complains

[Yoongi]: you’re worse than a kick in the balls

And it’s pretty cute too!

Yoongi laughs, despite himself. You’re weird, and annoying… and incredibly charming.

[Y/N]: wanna try?

I have a ballbusting diploma!

Some guys seem to enjoy it!

So he finds himself giving you his home address, because he actually enjoys the way you grip at his hair as his head finds home between your legs, or the way his name escapes in a broken moan as you reach your climax; or the way the tip of your tongue caresses the tip of his dick, licking away to the last drop as his fingers curl around the sheets.

He does it only for your orgasms and his own.

But after today, he puts an end to this thing, and that’s that.

It’s another shitty day. 

And the fact that today is his birthday, makes everything even more terrible. He never likes to celebrate it, it’s a way as good as any to remind him that another year has passed and still he hasn’t done shit with his existence. Cherry on top, his laptop decided to die while he was working, screwing up sleepless weeks of work.

 2 years 4 months

Yoongi huffs, fishes the keys out his back pocket as he pays attention to not spill his coffee, tightening the bag with his notes under his arm.

Frankly, he can’t wait for this day to end in a heartbeat. He wants to come back home, hide under his sheets and maybe cry a bit in the darkness of his silent bedroom. 

He wants to come back home and hear once more the last message you left on his voicemail, and maybe call you, tell you he’s doing fine even when he doesn’t, because he hates to make you worry. He wants to question you about your tour, tell you that Jimin sent him a video of your last show and you were breathtaking on that stage.

He wants to ask you when you’ll be back, because even his love for music can fill the emptiness you left behind. 

He puts the key in the keyhole and opens, hearing a light music that swipes his thoughts away. 

He catches a breath. “(Y/N)…?” he whispers, as if saying it out loud could make you vanish in thin air. But you stay there, with your beautiful shining smile, your eyes full of stars, and the beanie he gave you before your departure. He takes his sunglasses off, blinks a couple of times… but you don’t disappear.

This must be a joke of his imagination. A very bad joke on a horrible, shitty day—!

“Hello, Yoongi-chi…” but then, your voice lingers in the air. Sweet, a bit trembling, brimmed with that love you show him with no shame. You stand up, nearing him slowly. "You dyed your hair again.” You caress his fringe. “Blond… I like it.”

Yoongi would like to graze you, hug you, but he’s paralyzed. Muscles tense all at once when your fingertips meander on his face. They slide delicately on every line, on his closed eyelids, the thin eyelashes, his parted lips… he’s crossed by a piping hot warmth that makes his heart throb harder. 

He frowns. “Joonie?” he lets out a sigh. “There was no need to come. I sent you a message just to warn you but—“ words falter and die in the back of his throat when the chair turns, revealing the figure that’s occupying his 'throne’ -as Jungkook likes to call it to mock him.

“Joonie,” you interrupt, caressing his red cheek with your thumb. “I told him I wanted to surprise you. I arrived yesterday night and he hosted me.” Your warm breath tingles his chin. “Today’s your birthday. I would have never lost it for anything in this world.“ 

He cracks his eyes open, beyond the layer of sparks he sees your sweet smile. Geez, he missed it so much…

“How are you feeling, Yoongi-chi?”

“W-what are you doing here? How—!”

“Better,” he manages to say. "I… I had a shitty day.” He tilts his head to the side, enjoying your soft touch on his skin. “W-what about you?! How’s the tour going?! And—“

You gently touch his lips with your own. "Shh, calm down. We have two days to talk about everything.” You laugh when he pouts. “I know you’ve to work, I won’t bother you. I’ll take some rest on the sofa and—“ your words vanish on his mouth, now pressed against your own. 

Yoongi inhales sharply through his nose, so much that a line appears between his knitted brows. He enjoys the consistency of your lips, the way they mold against his own. He enjoys the slowness of that kiss as if it was the last one, the way the tip of his tongue gently caresses yours, feeling the electricity cross his whole body at every light touch. 

He’d like to tell you that he loves you, like he always does before concluding one of your phone-calls, but those three little words stay there, curled up in the corners of his mouth.

"I know. And I love you too.” Your eyes become two sweet half-moons when he tries to cover a gummy smile with his hands. Then, you inch away, resting your hands on your hips. There’s a strange glint crawling in your eyes as you size him up, munching the corner of your mouth. “So… do you want to fuck me at your place, or mine?”

He bites his bottom lip, squelching a laugh. The left corner of his mouth quirks up as he stays still, silent, scrutinizing the expression of uncertainty now dawning on your scarlet face.

“It’s ok. I-I need a small break,” he says with a low voice, inching away from you. “I’m so glad you’re here, (Y/N).” He rubs his nose against your own, letting out a small chuckle. “I missed you so much. More than I, well, you know—“ he swallows, feeling a weird anxiousness creep out his heart. 

“Because you… you still want to fuck me, don’t you?“

Holy shit, he wants to fuck you so badly. Just like he wanted that faraway day of December, when you were just a girl he kissed on a balcony and he was just a guy with weird purple hair.

Yoongi laughs, delivering you one of those gummy smiles that didn’t bloom in a while. He breaks the ocean between the pair of you and bends over, melting in your warm embrace.

"Our home is better.”

Your lips taste of tequila and orange juice.

Yoongi never liked Tequila, it’s too bitter, it sets his throat on fire, and leaves a bad taste in his mouth that lasts for hours. And yet, he’s unable to pull away from you. He squeezes your hips, presses your body against the wall, and follows the slow rhythm of this kiss he gave you a long time ago, unplanned.

 Day 1

Your tongue moves languidly and delicately against his own, with no rush -although your friends already showed up on the balcony twice and threatened you to abandon you here if you don’t move. He rests his fingertips on your jawline and tilts your head to the side, deepening the kiss.

“What are you doing here all alone, Dark Knight? Are you also watching over the city on Halloween?" 

It started like this.

A terrible joke that made him laugh lightheartedly. A silly question that mixed with the loud music coming from the living room, followed by your giggle as you almost tripped on the little step, spilling some of your orange cocktail. You swayed while approaching him, in a kind of I’m-trying-to-be-sexy move that made him chuckle once more; and when you situated yourself beside of him, he swore on his precious –and expensive- Genelec 8040A Studio Monitor Speaker that you were the most marvelous creature who’s ever spoken to him.

You inch away to take some breath. You’ve got shiny eyes that remind him of the lights sketching the city skyline when the night falls down, and warm hands that make goosebumps rise on his arms at every light touch. You tug at his bottom lip delicately with your teeth before going back to kissing him softly.

You tilt your head to the side when Yoongi starts leaving butterfly kisses on your jaw, sliding up. With the tip of his tongue, he traces the line of your ear, gently tugging at the earlobe. You instinctively spread your legs a bit more and he pulls his thigh between them, brushing it against you.

"I-I really gotta go now,” you whisper, gripping at his shirt as he keeps doing his ministrations.

“Why don’t we continue this tomorrow? I have a little thing in mind. Something that has to do with us and the backseat of my car,” he blows against your ear, your small chuckle makes him shake inside. “You know? I can make you see the Milky Way with my tongue technology… wanna try?”

There’s a glint of curiosity in your eyes brimmed with sparks. The same you had when he recounted you about his classes at the Music Department, the same you had when you told him: ”You’re the guy who always dyes his hair, I often see you at lunch with Chimchim!“; the same you had when his face kept gravitating toward yours as you were talking, closer and closer, bottom lip tightened between his teeth, until his mouth finally found home on yours.

The same you had when you noticed him staring at you, intensely, from the other side of the room, a few hours ago.

"Sounds fun.” You poke the tip of his nose with your finger. “But you should gimme your number first." 

"Sure. Later…”

You cling at his neck and seal his mouth with your own, running your hand up to his nape and through his hair, pulling it gently in your fist. A light moan escapes from the back of his throat when you press your breast against his chest, so close he can’t tell his heartbeat from yours anymore.

“I’m Yoongi, by the way,” it’s a barely whispered hush on your lips, followed by a deep long breath as you curl some purplish locks around your fingers.

You let out an airy laugh. “I’m (Y/N), by the way. But I highly doubt you’ll remember it.”

No, he probably won’t. Perhaps, you’ll be a fogged memory between a billion of fogged memories. A blurry face between a billion of blurry faces. A voice between a billion voices that will whirl in his mind once he’ll be on his bed, feeling dizzy, wondering if this night has been just a figment of his drunk imagination.

You’ll only be a girl he kissed on Jimin’s balcony.

But something -something in the way you look at him, in the way your tongue languidly follows his own, in your fingers still gripping at his hair, in your airy laugh when he whispers in your ear, in the way his heart spikes up and flip-flops when you make him smile- tells him that this won’t be your last time together.

He thinks. Or he’s sure. 

Yoongi feels it right into his bones.

[iwadori]

So I'm reading your works and I love them !! I was thinking of requesting some kind of drabble or whatever you like, about a female reader who has thick thighs and is somewhat plump and is in love with Tsukishima but he makes a comment about the food and she feels bad and when she meets Bokuto in the boot camp Bokuto is too cute and attentive to her asking for her number and a date. If you don't feel comfortable with this, just ignore it and good luck with your blog. Sorry my english is bad<3

When they make you insecure PT 5 (tsukishima,bokuto)

Part One Part Two  Part Three Part Four  Part Five Part 6

Word Count: 2.6K

Genre: Angst to Fluff

masterlist

Tsukishima

You and Tsukishima have been dating in your first year (as you both went to the same middle school together.)

You were in love with Tsukishima, you always have been to be honest, but once you became officially boyfriend and girlfriend your feelings amplified.

But recently, Tsukishima hasn’t been so nice.  

“Y/N we’re going on another training camp at Nekoma” Hinata exclaimed running up to you, as you leaning against Tsukishima “and you get to come too this time!”

You recently became the new trainee manager as the third-year manager, Kikyoko, is going to graduate. Tsukishima acted as if you being around all the time in practice was the worst thing in the world, but Yamagucchi always assured you that ‘Tsukki’ was just joking.

“Oh well that’s fun...” you say entertaining Hinata’s excitement. You were kind of excited to go to the training camp too, as it was in Tokyo after all. You were always a big fan of volleyball as your dad used to play for the national team and you were planning to play on the girls team this year but you felt that you didn’t have the body for it (which was obviously not true.)

Hinata kept on rambling on before Tsukishima insulted him. “Gosh Kei, you don’t have to be so rude.” you complained, he slightly nudged you off of him and put on his headphones showing you that he was not in a good mood.

You let the rest of the practice continue, making notes of things and basically being Kiyoko’s shadow. As it ended, you waited outside for Tsukishima to walk home with you, but one of the guys told you he left 5 minutes ago. You knew there was no point of chasing after him so you just walked on your own, making you sigh in defeat.

Tsukishima was what you would describe as hot and cold. Some days he was fine a ‘perfect gentlemen’ but other days, days like this Tsukishima was just Tsukishima.  

When you got home, you decided to watch matches of all the other schools just to get some insight. You were watching a Fukarodani V Nekoma match from a few years ago and something caught your eye, well someone did to be more specific. A beefy, bicolour haired boy who was hooting like an owl was mesmerizing to watch.

You saw that his name was Bokuto Koutarou which triggered your next actions, which were to internet stalk him. You learned that he was the captain of the team and the team’s ace and the 5th ace in the country which piqued your interest in the boy even more.

‘This is going to be an exciting training camp’ you think to yourself before going to sleep.

`Kiyoko gave you an itinerary of all the things you should bring, since you weren’t going to be joining in any of the matches you were reminded to bring things that would keep entertained.  

You get to the bus at the crack of dawn, ready to be driven to Tokyo. Hinata and Kageyama were already arguing (let’s pretend that they didn’t have to do the retakes in the test) Tanaka and Nishinoya were being loud, and the rest of the members were already asleep. You wanted to sit next to Tsukishima but when you were about to sit down, he put his carryon bag in the seat next to him.

The bus ride was around 4-5 hours, and you spent your time reading and sleeping. Daichi got the loudmouths to calm down making the bus ride more tolerable. You suffered from slight motion sickness but you powered through.

When you arrived there, you saw all the other teams and their buses too. You felt a bit overwhelmed, seeing these tall boys just crowd around an entrance way. But too your surprise, noticing your slight anxiousness, Tsukishima grabbed your hand in a hand-hold.  

The Nekoma coach, explained how the day would pan out and where each team would be residing for the week. There was a lot of commotion getting everyone settled, Hinata and Nishinoya were basically bouncing off of the wall commenting on all the people and the place and how they’re going to ‘crush the competition.’  

You could tell that when the other teams were looking at Karasuno they were all staring at Kiyoko. Inquisitive about how there wasn’t only one girl manager but there was two. As you were walking your eyes locked with Bokuto Koutarou’s making yours widen, you blush and turn your head quickly.  

What you didn’t know was, after your small interaction, Bokuto elbowed Akaashi and said “Akaaashi AKKAAASHI, did ya see that? did ya?” he was flying with happiness “That girl from Karasuno smiled at me. She’s really pretty.”

“I think she’s from Karasuno” Akaashi said “So maybe you’ll see her around”

Bokuto stared off in the direction you were walking in “Yeah, hopefully.”

The first day, everyone got settled in and then the teams went straight into games. There were two different gyms and today, in gym 1, you were watching Karasuno V Nekoma. (By the way I literally don’t remember the teams at the training camp besides Nekoma, Karasuno and Fukarodani.) The game was very back a point each team making point after point, you already knew of Nekoma’s captain, Kuroo Testurou and the setter Kenma, you’ve actually played games with Kenma online before so you were fairly acquainted with him already.

The games ended and it was now dinner time, the canteen was packed with all the boys rushing to line up for the food. You waited at the back of the line, not really caring about when you got your food. Suddenly, you felt a tap on your shoulder and you looked over to see Boktuo,  

“Hi.” he said “I’m Bok-”

“Bokuto Koutarou!” You finished “I'm a big fan..” you cringed immediately at your excitement ‘pull it together Y/N’ you scold yourself.

“Oh well hi, I’m glad you know who I am” he said “and may I ask for your name?”  

“Oh I’m Y/N L/N” you say with a slight blush “I'm the trainee manager from Karasuno.”  

“Cool! Well I hope to see you aro-” he starts  

“Y/N, I’ve been looking all over for you, I already got your food for you.” Tsukishima said pulling at your arm a bit harshly, dragging you over to a table with the Karasuno team.

“Gosh Tsukki, no need to be so harsh” you say rubbing at your wrist, he didn’t apologize and just started eating his food.  

You look down at your plate and see the small portion that Tsukki got for you. The Karasuno bunch was being loud, as they usually are, so when you whisper “Tsukki what the fuck is this” whilst nudging him in the side, he didn’t hear you (or atleast he pretended he didn’t.) You tried again but a little louder saying, “Tsukishima what the fuck is this.” you realised you said it a bit too loud as the whole Karasuno table stopped their conversations to look over at the slight commontion you caused.

“What do you mean Y/N?” he said with a slight smirk on his face.

“I mean what’s with the portion size of a bird that you gave me?” you ask getting upset “Do you really think im that big?”

“Well, you could start eating less that’s for sure.” he said earning gasps from you and some of the people sitting at the table “Y/N let's face it, you eat like a pig and you look like an elephant, me making your food portion smaller is the least I could do.”  

By now you had tears in your eyes, Tsukishima was a dick. You knew this, everybody knew this to be honest, yet you still loved him. He wasn’t like this in middle school, yes he was a bit snarky and rude (but wasn’t every middle schooler?) High school Tsukishima was like a completely different person. As much as you wanted to run away and hide, you knew you couldn’t.  

So you stood up and said “Tsukishima, I’ve spent 3 years loving and pining after you, because I thought you were this great guy, but turns out you’re a huge asshole” you start making some of the people listening in smile in laughter “Tsukishima, I’ve hated this past year dating you, you’ve been such a huge dick and I’m finally stopping you. I can’t do this anymore. I won’t.” You start making your way to exit before finally saying “Oh and by the way I’m not the pig here, you are... oh and I’m breaking up with you.” You left, hearing a few laughs and some claps behind you.

You felt relieved, like the massive cloud that’s been over your head is finally gone. You went to the gym since you knew it was empty and picked up a ball to just throw it around a bit. After a while of ‘de-stressing,’ you hear someone else enter the gym.

“Oh I didn’t know you’d be here.” said Bokuto  

“Well here I am,” you say awkwardly “I can leave if you want me too, I know this is for actual volleyball players.”

“No no it’s fine you can definitely stay, in fact do you mind setting for me?” he asks  

“Sure, of course I don’t mind” you reply, excited you get to play with someone.  You haven’t played in ages, you always begged Tsukishima to just throw a ball around with you but he never did.  

You set to Boktuo a lot, with him always asking for ‘another one’ everytime he spiked the ball. Eventually, you were tired of setting and wanted to spike. You originally was a spiker to begin with taking after your dad. Thats why you took a liking to Bokuto in the first place cause he reminded you of the joys you had when watching your father play.

Bokuto set a ball to you and you spiked it with great strength and accuracy smiling at the burning feeling you felt in your palm.  

“Woahh” Bokuto shouted going towards you in amazement “Where did you learn how to spike like that?”

“From my dad, I don’t know if you heard of him before but my dad’s name is D/N L/N...?” you say

“D/N L/N, Y/N he is my idol!” he shouted again “I want to be just like him.”

“I think you can, I see a lot of similarites in the way you both play.” you say

“Really! And you’ve seen me play before..?” he asks

“Yeah, I watched some of your games before coming here... you’re really good” you shyly admit.

“Wow.”

You and Bokuto spend the rest of your time, talking about volleyball you’re interests, things you have in common, your likes and dislikes. Talking to Bokuto was refreshing, he didn’t randomly insult you or make snide comments about your weight or your looks. He just genuinely looked happy to be there talking to you, unlike Tsukishima.  

Seeing your change in mood, Bokuto stops talking and asks “are you alright? I forgot to ask earlier, but I saw what happened in the canteen and I hope you’re okay.”  

“Yeah I’m fine, it’s just things with me and Tsukishima reached a breaking point, I guess...” you say sniffling a bit talking about it “But it’s fine now I’ve broken up with him and I feel better already.”

“So you’re saying your single...?” he asked blushing a bit

“Yeah I guess I am...” you smile blushing also.  

“Okay great...well I hope this isn’t too forward after everything happened with Tsukki and all but...” he starts “but would you like to go on a date with me?”

“Who me?” you ask as if you weren’t the only other person in the room

“No the volleyball” he responds sarcastically “Of course you Y/N.”  

“Are you sure, cause to be honest Bokuto you’re a really good-looking guy” you say making him smile widely “so I think you need someone to match your level in attractiveness” you look down and his smile drops.

“What do you mean?” he asks before realising all the stuff Tsukishima said about you “Y/N you’re beautiful, your face, your body just you.” you blush at his words “when I first saw you when you were walking past us in the entrance way the first thing I thought and said about you was “Akaashi who is that girl she’s beautiful.””  

“Really?” you ask with disbelief

“Mhm” he nods excitedly “So will you go on a date with me?”  

“I guess so...” you say a bit unsure

“HEY HEY HEY!” he exclaims “I gotta go tell akaashi!” he runs out of the gym in a hurry making you laugh, but he comes back to give you a quick unexpected kiss on the cheek making you smile.

You checked your phone for the time realising that you’ve been with Bokuto for 3 hours and you knew that everyone would be going to sleep now. As you are the manager you slept seperately from the rest of the team but before you went to your sleeping quaters you went to Karasunos.  

“Y/N where have you been? We’ve been worried about you.” asked yammagucchi  

“It’s fine yams don’t worry about it, guys” you say catching everyones attention “I just wanted to apologise to you for my outburst at dinner, it wasn’t my intention to cause a scence.”

“It’s fine Y/N” said sugawara “He definitely deserved it.”

“Yeah as your marvellous senpai we gave him a good telling off” said Tanaka and Nishinoya  making you chuckle.  

“Okay well thanks guys, I’m going to sleep goodnight.”

“Wait Y/N can I speak with you.” asked Tsukishima gesturing to outside the room

“Umm sure” you respond following him into the corridor.

“I just want to say I’m sorry for the things I’ve said and done over the past year and how I’ve been a terrible boyfriend, you don’t deserve that. So, I’m sorry.”  

“I can’t say I can forgive you yet.” you say making Tsukishima look sad “but maybe with effort from you we can become friends possibly?”  

“Just friends?” he said with hope in voice thinking that you could be something more.

“Just friends.” you repeated and confirmed “Besides I have been asked on a date”  

“With who?”  

“None of your business stingyshima” you mock the nickname that Hinata calls him making him scowl and you smile “Goodnight.”

After Bokuto’s confession and Tsukishima’s apology, the rest of the training camp went off without a hitch. In your breaks and lunchtimes, you got to know more about Bokuto and with Kuroo’s help you even got to sneak out to actually go on your date. You sometimes even went to practice with them getting to show off your skills, with Bokuto cheering you on and complimenting you every single time.  

Tsukishima kept his distance for the most part, and kept the snarky comments about you and Bokuto to himself (even though he was dying to say them.) You eventually fully forgave Tsukishima in your 3rd year but you definitely weren’t as close as you used to be. Tsukishima’s comments and actions did affect you for a while however with the help of your loving boyfriend, you were reminded how beautiful you are no matter what weight, shape or height you were.

You and Bokuto stayed together, you made sure to come to every one of his games and when you introduced him to your dad he fainted on sight. Your dad and Bokuto got along, and became very close friends, Bokuto always came to him for advice (especially volleyball advice.) You loved Bokuto and he definitely loved you too.

AN: I hope you liked it, since I didn’t want to make it too similar too the Atsumu insecure one. And I feel like it dragged out a bit but got rushed in the endd....but oh well...

[tobi-momo]

A Misunderstanding

PAIRING: Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader

GENRE: Angst | Hurt/Comfort | Reverse Comfort

WARNINGS: a lot of crying from both you and kuroo | cursing | mentions of sex | cheating (kind of? youll know when reading) | angst | mentions of drinking/being drunk | nothing is suggestive!! oh ya yall are married btw

WORD COUNT: 3k

A/N: ok ik this is long but this idea came from literally nowhere but i decided to write it thank you @combat-wombatus for helping me you helped put ideas in my brain<333 now i wasnt originally going for a happy ending but im really bad at angst so enjoy the shitty ending :)

“Please, Y/n, you know I didn't mean it,” he pleaded, his large hands desperately grabbing at your form while you push him away, your breaking sobs making his heart shatter. “Please, baby, don’t leave me,” he begs, falling on his knees in front of your trembling body, not being able to tear his eyes off of your heartbroken ones. He needed you to stay. He needed to show you that he isn’t that guy and that he would do anything for you. It was a one time thing. He wasn’t even sober. It wasn’t him. It was the alcohol. He wasn’t thinking straight. Please forgive him, please, please, please.

But you couldn’t. No matter how hard or how much you loved him and wanted to, the pain that ripped at your heart every time you looked at him was too much to bear. So you didn’t. You turn your blurry, glassy eyes away from him as he grabs your hand and forces it into his; your lips quivering and knees shaking. You couldn’t keep the betrayal and agony inside, whining and weeping at him, your knees giving out before your legs slam against the floor, your head near the carpet as you try and keep your affliction at bay.

“Y/n, please,” he whines, tears streaming down his pale cheeks; his admission of his unfaithfulness drained the color from his face. “Please forgive me, I need you, I love you so much.”

“W-” you sniffle, not knowing what to say. You knew you didn’t have to say anything at all, that you didn’t owe him any words, but you just...you just needed to know. “Why,” your voice quivered and cracked, your throat sore, “why did you,” you take a long breath, grabbing your chest to try and stop the heartache, the sudden cramp that formed where it used to be filled with warmth and love, “do this to me? With her?” You look up at him once with wide, searchful eyes as you ponder the reasons and look for the answers in his empty pupils.

“I wasn’t thinking straight, baby, I didn’t know what I was doing, please,” his voice stammers, trying to get you to understand that he really didn’t know what he was doing. “I would never do this to you, I-” “But you did.” Your tone is no longer sad and confused, but angry and fed up. His head backing up quickly, not expecting the response. “You made a promise, Tetsurou, remember?” You glare at him with menacing eyes as you hold up the very finger he kissed and placed the ring on on your wedding day. The beautiful diamond ring that had his initials carved in the interior and little gorgeous jewels that made the walls sparkle once hit with the hot sun was no more; the dark, gloomy piece of rock and metal meaning nothing but lies and mistrust.

“No, Y/n, please. Don’t do this to me,” he adjures guiltily.

“Don’t do this to you?” Your voice laced with deadly venom, standing and backing up, wiping your mouth with your hand in annoyance, placing it on your hip. “You did this to me! You did this to us! You went out! You got drunk! You fucked someone else! And not even a random girl! No! You just had to fuck your ex!” Your voice cracked again before you inhaled sharply and covered up your struggle.

“Y/n, I didn’t know what I was doing!”

“And that’s an excuse?? What, so now you can go fuck whoever you want and say ‘I didn’t know what I was doing!’” you mimic, “so you can get away with it every time?”

He didn’t answer. He looked at the ground, understanding exactly where you came from.

“Hm? Are you gonna answer me, or sit there like a coward?”

He could tell fully well you were just saying this because you were hurt. You didn’t mean any of it. You loved him. No matter what, you will always love him. Trusting him was out of the box for a while, maybe forever. But he can’t lose you. He knew you were soulmates- he knew you were made for each other. There was a reason you guys made it this far and only had big problems now. He needed to find that reason and use it for himself to win you back. He needed you back.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes, your dramatic hand gestures coming to a halt at his words, your figure coming to a stand still as you wait for him to finish. “You don't deserve this. You don’t deserve me. Please know that it was a mistake and that I’ll never do it again ever, ever, ever,” he repeats, wanting it to sound as sincere as he means. “Just please give me a chance to make this up to you, please don’t leave me by myself without you,” he sobs out, putting his head in his hands.

You knew you shouldn’t feel bad for him. But god-fucking-dammit are you feeling bad for him. You knew you still loved him, you knew he still loved you- that much was obvious. You couldn’t see him for a while, no. Could you guys work it out? Maybe stitch the wound? Wait until the scar is barely visible anymore? Would that even work?

“Tetsurou,” a single, hot tear dripping down your face as you point to the ground. “I don’t know if I can ever trust you again.”

“I know, I know, just please give me a chance to help fix this!” He cries at your feet, his body bundled in a ball of self hatred and guilt. “I can do it, baby. I can help things go back to normal.”

“I don’t think they ever will be normal again.”

He whines, trying to negotiate with you as much as he can. “Let me fix us. Let me give you my everything again, let me show you that I’m all yours and no one else's, please,” he moans in anticipation for rejection, knowing the chances of you agreeing were next to zero.

The next few hours are silent. Him alone in the bedroom. Crouching on the floor as he ponders your possible answer. You work in the kitchen, making food to satisfy your appetite. He could hear your sniffles from the bedroom and picture you wiping your tears as you carry the pots on the stove. God, he was the biggest piece of shit ever known. What the fuck went through his mind when he was fucking his ex? He only remembers some of it, them waking up in bed together after, only wearing undergarments underneath the sheets and him holding her waist as if she were you. He thought they had ended on good terms, knowing that they were better as friends. He rushed out the door, not being able to stay in the same room without getting sick. He knew what he had to do.

He opens the door to the living room, a slight creak gaining your attention as you stir the sauce in the pan. Your eyes are puffy, your lip still trembling as you try to turn away from him. He only takes about two steps forward before he stops, trying to find the words he wants to say.

“Listen, I know you said you needed time, and I’m not rushing you at all whatsoever. I want to give you all the time in the world to think this over. If you need, I can go to Kou’s house and stay there for a while. He won’t mind. I just want to give you the space you deserve.”

You nod in response, your head still facing away before he whispers an “I love you” before he slips out of the apartment.

~.~.~.~

The next few days were tortue. Not being able to sleep in the same bed he would sleep in with you, not being able to watch the same tv shows, not being able to even be in his presence at least once a day like you used to melted a hole of despair inside you: eating away at your emptiness, taking away the numbness that you so desperately needed right now. The feeling came back- the one that you tried shutting out three hours ago. It crept up at you, flipping your stomach and weighing your lungs down to the floor, your throat sore and dry. Your eyes wet with a blurry wall as your tears build up once again, missing your cheeks as you crouch down looking at the floor, falling on the tile. The droplets containing your anguish splatter on the ground, your raggedy whimpers echoing throughout the vacant apartment, making it all the more obvious he wasn’t there.

Knock knock knock

Was that the door?

Your wide, unbelieving eyes turned to the wooden door frame; the knocks getting louder and faster. You quickly stand up and try to collect yourself, preparing to have a long talk with Tetsurou. You grab the handle, turning it- the door opening with a tiny creak.

Oh.

“Hi! Kuroo left his jacket at the party the other day, is he here?”

Oh, that bitch.

“No. He’s not.” You deadpan, not finding her cheery, happy expression amusing.

“Oh no! Uh, well, here, can you give this back to him for me?”

“Stop smiling at me like you aren’t part of the reason he’s gone.” You snark, glaring at her with sharp eyes as she backs up, confused.

“W-what?”

“You heard me. Don’t act fucking clueless.”

“Excuse me? Who are you to talk to m-”

“Oh, cut the shit,” you roll your eyes, “I know you slept with Tetsurou, you don’t need put on whatever the fuck this is,” you gesture at her.

“What the hell are you talking about? What are you, fucking crazy?” Your eyes narrow in confusion, your disgusted scowl lessening at her words.

“Right. You probably don’t remember because you were blacked out,” you add sarcastically. “He told me what you guys did. Now you know. So, I would love it if you would just leave.”

“What are you- Me and Kuroo didn’t do shit last night. I drank like two beers and was hanging out with another girl the entire time,” she explains, looking offended. Your face loosens into an expression she couldn’t read. “He blacked out early and passed out on the couch while I was busy talking with the other girl.”

“Huh?” You whisper, your disoriented thoughts not aligning to a proper conclusion.

“I didn’t go to bed until like,” she thought back, “I don’t know, three in the morning? There were people passed out on the floor so I decided to take the guest bedroom with her. I was still awake when Kuroo came into the room, I’m guessing because he thought it was yours, based off of how he kept mumbling your name and shit,” she exhales, “he grabbed onto me once he got in and just clung.” You glower at her, huffing. She sees this, sighing before continuing, “Calm down, remember nothing happened. Remember that girl? She ended falling off the bed because I was scooting away from his clingy ass.” You look at her blankly, trying to fit the pieces together. “She ended up leaving the party completely,” she mumbled in embarrassment before you speak up.

“Then why did he tell me you guys had sex?” You mutter quietly, although assuming she heard since her head backed up while she quickly scoffs.

“I swear to God, that man. Listen.” You look up into her eyes- her genuine eyes. “Me and Kuroo didn’t do a single thing. I didn’t do anything to him and he didn’t do anything to me. I’ll have a conversation with him later because he is an absolute dumbass,” she breathed.

What the fuck?? You were just supposed to believe her?

“How am I supposed to believe that?”

“Me and him ended a long time ago. I don’t like him like that and I haven’t for a while. And seeing he was bragging about you the entire time at the party, he’s over me, too. Besides, I’m not even into guys that much anymore anyways,” she grinned and winked at you. The shock and realization hit you like a truck. She wasn’t even- oh my God. She chuckled at your expression; you ran away from her to the counter to get your phone, quickly unlocking it and tapping on Tetsurou’s contact.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you mumble over and over. To tap the call button, listening to it ring as you bring your phone up to your ear, hearing him pick up the phone almost immediately after.

“Y/n? Are you okay?” He sounded worried. It’s only been about a week, he had hoped that you weren’t going to leave him.

“Get over here, right now, Tetsurou.” Your voice made it seem like it was urgent, so he quickly picked up his jacket from the couch, and you could hear the jingling of his keys as he grabbed them and opened the door, almost slamming it shut once he left.

~.~.~.~

“Y/n?” He asked at the open front door, wondering why it wasn’t closed. “Y/n, you have to be careful and close the door, we have them for a reason, you know,” he said as he walked in. Even after being at the line of a break-up, he still cares for your well-being. He didn’t even do anything wrong and he was still caring for you as a loved one should. He always did everything to make you feel comfortable and safe, so once he knew that he had slept with his ex he was completely devastated to his core. He didn’t want to do this to you, but you had the right to know.

“Tetsu.” You called. Already back to nicknames? This is good, right?

“Yes? Y/n?” He was scared, to say the least, feeling awkward and not knowing what to do. He walked scarcely towards your figure sitting on the couch, not caring to drop his keys and jacket on the counter. He had a feeling this might go wrong.

“We need to talk.” Shit. This is exactly what he didn’t want to hear. Hearing those words he couldn’t help but think that you were going to make him pack his stuff and go. “So, I talked with your ex.” You speak slowly, not wanting your words to come out wrong. You don’t want him to take any of this in a bad way at all. Yet his eyes widen drastically, his heartbeat racing and his nerves pricking him. “You are just one big dummy, aren’t you?”

What? What are you talking about?

“What?”

“You didn’t sleep with her. She told me everything that happened that night. She’s not even into guys anymore. Tetsu-”

This couldn’t be happening. Not only did he accuse himself of cheating, he accused himself of cheating with his ex, and that he cheated with his ex at a party, while you two are married. And then it turns out it wasn’t true? What the hell was wrong with him? He jeopardized your entire relationship because he was too drunk to know what was going on.

“Wait, what?” He yells, angrily sitting down on the couch, “so you’re telling me-” you nodded and hummed an ‘mhm’ in response. His hands find their way to his hair, pulling at the roots and scratching his scalp, his low grunts of pain and fury seeping out of his throat as he frustratingly comprehends what he just did.

You rush over to him, grabbing his wrists and pushing them down to his lap as fast as you can, making his eyes find their way to your blown out pupils. You can see the hot tears prickle down his cheek as he frowns at you, completely and utterly defeated.

“Tetsu, I don’t want you to hurt yourself, it’s okay,” you reassure, giving him a happy smile. He wanted to smile back, but he couldn’t control the broken sob that escaped him. “Hey, hey,” you try to grab his attention as he pulls his head down, crying. “It’s okay, baby, it’ll be okay.” You wrap your arms around his head, protecting him as you softly coo and ‘shh’ him quietly in his ear. ‘I’m sorry’ kept coming out of his mouth as he clinged to you, not being able to help his want to be closer to you. The realization that he just almost broke your heart completely and he had worried about divorce for this shit made him want to just rip his scalp out. He was so stupid. So, so so, stupid. “Tetsu, look at me, please. Look at me,” you whisper, bringing your hand to his chin, dragging it up so you could catch sight of his hazel irises. His eyes red and puffy, his cheeks wet and his eyes droopy, you couldn’t do anything but frown at the sight. He hated himself right now, not wanting to face the embarrassment and the humiliation of the situation.

“You don’t deserve me, I’m so sorry,” he whimpered in your arms, gripping them tighter and tighter for comfort- you knowing that he needed it right now. You had already pulled him into your chest, feeling his wet tears soak your shirt, your hands rubbing his back and your fingers gently grazing his throbbing scalp.

“It’s okay, I forgive you, Tetsu, you did the right thing by telling me you did it instead of hiding it from me, and then it turns out you didn’t do it at all.” Your cheeks start to feel hot, and you don’t even realize your sniffles until you could feel a dam break at your water line. You couldn’t stop them, the tears of relief. You didn’t want to stop them. You were glad that they were her, glad that they were for him, glad they were because you knew the truth, glad because you knew you two would be okay.

You looked back at your ring, watching it bloom like a flower in the spring, the meaning coming back to your marriage. It wasn’t just metal and rock anymore, it was a gorgeous promise.

“I love you, Tetsurou. Don’t forget that. You’re staying with me, alright?” you whisper into his hairline.

“Thank you,” he cries.

taglist: @solar3lunar @flattykawadoorusmilkbread @toosharkinternet @hitosushi @alpha3113 @awmahleebkg

haikyuu taglist: @pies-writes-and-more @luvrboykento

REQUESTS: OPEN

reblogs are appreciated :))

[luminari-mc]

(Mammon x MC/Reader)

Prompt: "She doesn't compare to you. No one does.”

Genre: Angst, hurt(emotional)/comfort.

Pairing: GN!MC/Reader x Mammon

Summary: You and Mammon finally get to enjoy a well-deserving shopping trip just between the two of you. Just as you are about to hit the next shop, your attention is caught by an image advertised in the street.

Warnings: N/A

A/N: I wanted to try my hands at a prompt that is tagged as "fluff", but of course I ended up turning it into something angsty instead. But I like sad stuff, so that still works for me.

-------------------------------------------

It wasn't often that you got to spend time with Mammon without having any of his brothers around to bother you. But you had made it very clear to them that these few hours after school would be spent with Mammon, and only him. And for today's trip, you two had decided to go shopping in one of the busiest streets in the Devildom.

Clothes and jewelry stores, malls- you had done them all. When most of this time had been spent doing window shopping, Mammon had still insisted on getting at least a few bags of purchased goods for each of you by the end of the day. After all, what was the point of going on a shopping trip, if you didn't end up emptying your bank account only to regret it later?

And so, thanks to the demon's wonderful influence, your arms had now several bags hanging off of them. There was a certain guilt still looming over your head as you realized way overboard you might have gotten with your purchases, but Mammon promised he would take care of any financial problems you could encounter in the near future because of that. You still wondered how he was going to manage it, him being Mammon and all...

"Damn, now THAT'S what I call a good haul! Look at ya!" The white-haired demon grinned as he watch you hop out of the store, the glass doors opening automatically at your presence to let you out. He placed his wrists on his hips as his own bags dangled in his hands. "What'cha got for yourself this time?"

"They actually had that jacket I saw in a magazine the other day!" The doors closed behind you as you showed the white bag which contained the jacket. "You were right, that store was amazing. I can't believe you never showed it to me before."

"Ha! Told ya the Great Mammon knew where the best treasures were! Consider it an exclusive info, because I ain't gonna share more if any of my brothers are around next time." Mammon turned around before flipping a few of his bags over his shoulder, as you instantly began to trot to get to his level.

"What? So all this time you knew about it and you didn't tell me? Just because Asmo comes with us sometimes?" You expressed shock, right before your eyebrows joined together. "Really, as if you couldn't have told me over text or something."

"And have you go without me?! Nah, ain't gonna happen- you'd just get lost and end up in the worst store possible." Mammon glanced your way, and you could only smirk at his poor excuse.

"Sure, you're right. I forgot that humans don't have the same flawless sense of orientation as demons do." Despite your obviously sarcastic tone, Mammon didn't seem to register it as he nodded at your words.

"Exactly! Even if I gave you the full address, who knows where you'd end up? I don't want ya to come and complain to me afterwards, so it's gotta be with me or nothin'."

Even as you rolled your eyes, you noticed Mammon's face slightly turning away from yours, probably to hide the extra shade of color that had appeared on his cheeks ever so discreetly. Even when he was in his usual tsundere mood, it was endearing to see how concerned he was for your safety. And just how badly he wanted to be alone with you.

"So, where to next?" You asked without really thinking, surprising yourself that even after your extensive purchasing, you still wanted to do more. Or maybe it was that you didn't want this date to end right away. The past few weeks had been nothing but the brothers interrupting each other when any of them found themselves alone with you, so getting to spend some alone time with one of them, especially with Mammon, deserved to be extended a bit more.

"Glad ya asked!" As if a battery had been plugged into him, the demon brandished his arm into the air, the bags swinging by his face and missing him by a few inches. "I got this whole place where they're sellin' tons of stuff for pretty cheap, but it's actually authentic branded things. See, they're actually sold to that one guy who then has to sell them to another guy, and..."

As you listened to Mammon explain how he was able to find "authentic stuff" (probably not that authentic, you were pretty sure about that) for less than a quarter of its original price, your eyes found themselves drifting to an impressive ad plastered on a building the two of you were walking by. Recognizing the habit of Majolish to put their models on display for everyone to see was pretty easy, but that wasn't what caught your eye in the moment.

What tuned Mammon down completely in your ears, were the models themselves. The second born, sitting on a stool with a ripped shirt and pants, a few accessories hanging off his neck and barely covering anything of his exposed chest. He looked serious, staring straight at the objective- and at you, while the light shined on him to completely capture his frame for the picture.

And sitting down in the middle of the shot, between his legs, was a female demon wearing a red leather dress, her head resting on top of Mammon's leg. The clawed hand dangling off his knee- covered in golden rings, seemed to taunt you, as well as the piercing yellow eyes she had. Saying she wasn't beautiful would be lying. In fact, she was absolutely stunning. A perfect model for a perfect shot. Just looking at her made you feel small, like a prey that was about to be devoured by a hungry beast, the longer you were looking at her.

But that's what demons were supposed to make you feel like, right?

"Hey!" Mammon called out from the distance he had put between the two of you since you had stopped walking beside him. "Yo, MC!"

Watching as you kept staring into nothing, Mammon rolled his shoulders with a furrowed brow before walking back toward you, his head tilting to the side as he noticed your dead expression.

"Huuh hello, Devildom to MC? In which realm did ya get lost this time?"

"They replaced it." The words that left your mouth were weak, almost too silent for him to hear. It's as if all of the energy you had had evaporated from your body in an instant.

"Huh?" Mammon grew a bit concerned at this sudden change. His eyes perked up at the ad you were looking at, as you continued.

"The shoot we did together." Finally, you spared yourself from the sight, your gaze dropping to the ground. "They already replaced it with another one."

As soon as Mammon understood why *this* ad in particular seemed to be upsetting you so much, his jaw was already clenching. He remembered the stars he had seen in your eyes the previous week when you saw yourself on the Majolish ad, posing beside him- a shoot opportunity you had gotten while accompanying him after RAD a few days prior. In the middle of his shoot, he practically didn't leave any choice to his agent and had insisted that you be included in the shots to promote one of the new pieces of jewelry the brand was planning to release in the upcoming months. Asmo, who was there to witness your reaction on that day the three of you went out, had even taken a hundred pictures or so of you posing in front of the ad.

Except that, the jewelry you had posed with, was now present on the new model posing alongside Mammon.

He had made sure to engrave that smile of yours in his head at the time, even going so far as to snap a picture of your face while you were too focused on Asmo to notice him. But now, there was absolutely no trace of that same happiness anymore.

"The fuck?" The snarl that left him shook the walls of his throat. "That wasn't supposed to be advertised before another month! Why'd they have to take ours so soon?!"

"It's okay, Mammon." The demon stopped growling as his eyes lowered on the hand that was clutching his arm. "I mean... I'm not a model. Figures they wouldn't put it up for long... I-I mean, look at me. Seriously, who would want to see my face being exposed for longer than they can bare? It's hard to imagine. I wouldn't probably have sold their product anyway, so... it's okay."

The look on your face was devastating. Despite trying your best to smile, the tears pricking in your eyes were threatening to roll down your cheeks at any second. Mammon felt his heart being stabbed with a thousand invisible daggers, he couldn't bear to watch you feeling insulted in such a way.

His bags were immediately dropped onto the floor, the demon no longer caring for any of the fragile items he may have bought. His hands swung forward to cup your cheeks, forcing your face up to look at him straight in the eyes.

"Hey hey, MC. C'mon, look at me."

You did your best not to let your vision turn blurry because of the upcoming tears, and stared back at Mammon, your bottom lip trembling weakly.

"I don't care what anyone, model agents or not, can say- you'd sell a thousand more times than any fuckin' models out there, okay? In fact, you're worth even more than their stupid jewelry!"

His thumb quickly brushed away a tear from the corner of your eye as his other hand came to rest on your temple.

"They just put that one up there because that model is famous. They don't care about what's really beautiful, they just want to boast their popularity to the rest of the world." The blue of his eyes seemed to radiate the closer he moved towards you. "But I know what's beautiful. And her? She doesn't compare to you. No one does."

You could only look down in shame as his hands never left you, closing your eyes shut to let a couple tears out before Mammon grabbed a tissue from his pocket to dry your face. He patiently waited a few seconds for you to calm down, soothing you with slow caresses of your hair until your shoulders stopped shaking.

"I'm sorry..." you muttered, sniffling as you passed a wrist over your eyes. "I don't know why that upset me so much..."

"Ya got nothing to be sorry about." Mammon retrieved his hands from your head, only to grab the bags that were hanging off of your arms. He somehow manages to hold them alongside his own behind him, before wrapping the other arm around your shoulder.

"Hey, I'd call this a day. How about I prepare ya a bath when we're home? Courtesy of the Great Mammon."

You nodded, your lips arching into a smile as you grabbed the hand hanging off your shoulder. The day was cut too short for your liking, but you didn't feel up for any additional purchases, or to properly enjoy your outing anymore.

"Will you wash my hair?" You entertwined your fingers with his as he gave them a gentle squeeze.

"Pah, of course! Who else but me could do that?" He huffed through his nose, shaking his head at such an obvious question. Your laugh ringing in his ears gave him a brief moment of respite.

But the demon furrowed his brows as he lead you into your walk back home, keeping you snuggled at his side. Holding the bags in his left hand, his white nails sharply digged into his palm the more steps he took alongside you.

Making them cry? Such a big, big mistake. One thing was sure, Mammon wasn't about to let that one pass.

"But before that..." The hiss that escaped his throat went unnoticed by the two of you as your head rested against his shoulder.

"I'll have a few calls to make."

[tyongxnct]

𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑚𝑒 - 𝐽𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝐽𝑎𝑒𝘩𝑦𝑢𝑛

pairing: Jaehyun x reader

summary: After your break up with Jaehyun, you were always on his mind. It’s been almost two years and he missed you so much, it was torture being without you. Nobody loved him like you did and no matter how much he tried to get you off his mind, he only wanted you. Every night a different woman in his bed but he always imagined you. Jaehyun wanted you back but were you ready to face him?

song: feel me - Selena Gomez

genre: angst, exes-to-lovers!au

warnings: mentions of cheating, swearing, alcohol consumption, mention of sex

word count: 3,7k

A/N: this is part two of lose you to love me  I hope you like this, I literally wrote this in five hours lmao, have fun reading and don’t forget to listen to feel me by Selena Gomez! 

taglist: @fluffyjaes​ @m1na4u​ @cosmiclatte28​

© tyongxnct on all platforms

No one love you like I love ya Never cheat, never lie Never put no one above ya I gave you space and time And now you're telling me you miss it And I'm still on your mind We were one in a million And love is hard to find

Do you stay up late, just so you don't dream?

“Hey buddy. Are you ready to go home?”

Johnny looked at his friend with worry in his eyes. “Let’s stay a little longer. Please Johnny.” Jaehyun begged Johnny. He needs the distraction. He needs the alcohol to feel numb, the pain he feels is slowly killing him.

“Come on, it’s late. You need some sleep buddy.”

“N-No Johnny please- I don’t want to go.” Jaehyun mumbled.

“Jaehyun-“

“You can go home if you want. I’m going to stay.  I don’t want to be alone.”

Jaehyun and his wife, his ex-wife now, divorced almost three months ago, about five months after their wedding. Jaehyun met her one night at the club and she wrapped him around her finger and one night became many sleepless nights together. He should be with you, his girlfriend, but the woman in his arms was someone else and after spending so much time with her, he was confused and thought that he fell in love with her.

Breaking up with you wasn’t an option, he was still in love with you, he was just bored after spending years with you and he wanted something new, something exciting and cheating behind your back was the only way he could feel the thrill.

Jaehyun really wanted to marry you, but not while he was cheating and he couldn’t stop, he couldn’t stop secretly meeting her and talking to her when you were sleeping. Jaehyun didn’t want to let go of that thrilling feeling and whenever you talked about marriage, he feared loosing the excitement he felt when he was with her and not with you. But Jaehyun never thought that the option of you leaving him was there. He never thought about how you felt and how he treated you. Jaehyun thought you’d stay with him forever, no matter how long it would take him to breakup with her and marry you.

You were always there and when you told him that you want to breakup, he didn’t know what to feel or what to do. Should he stop you from leaving? Should he break up with her and just marry you?

After you left he spend more and more time with her and when he did the mistake of asking her to marry him while he was totally wasted, she agreed and it didn’t take long for them to say yes.

Jaehyun did many drunk mistakes in his life and he slowly realized that everything leads back to her, his ex-wife. Your relationship was destroyed because he cheated on you with her, your relationship was destroyed because he told himself that he wanted her and not you, your relationship was destroyed because he couldn’t stop his affair and his relationship was destroyed because he let you go to be with her.

Jaehyun realized while he was married, that every decision he had made was wrong. Everything he did to push you away was wrong. The thrill he always felt was wrong. The excitement he felt when he was with her was wrong, everything turned upside down and he regrets chasing that weird feeling he felt when he first met her. He regrets letting her in and letting you go. The love of his life.

How could he? How could he do that to you? How could he destroy the best thing that had happened to him?

After the divorce, Jaehyun felt lonelier than ever, but he didn’t know why. He didn’t know that the missing puzzle piece was you and that it was always you he needed and loved.

He didn’t know that you were the one his heart longed for, but after seeing you one night with your friends at a bar, after seeing you smile so happily, he realized that the missing piece was you. Jaehyun realized how lonely he was because you weren’t there, because he didn’t see your face and that beautiful smile you have.

Jaehyun’s chest tightened and he left the bar before you could see him. Jaehyun was ashamed, he couldn’t face you after everything he did to you.

Jaehyun missed you every passing day more and more. He was thinking about you and every time he remembered the way you looked at him when you broke up with him, he found himself crying and suffering because you didn’t deserve any of that. You didn’t deserve to be treated like how he treated you. You were everything and so much more.

Jaehyun regrets leaving you alone all the time and the one time he asked you to stay longer at Yuna’s makes him so mad, because back then, he missed you so much but he ignored the feeling until you left him forever.

“Dude, come on-“

“Seems like your friend doesn’t want to go home yet.”

Jaehyun and Johnny looked at the person talking. A pretty woman, her body barely covered, and the look in her eyes was enough for Jaehyun to stay and not go home.

“Don’t worry, I can keep an eye on him for you.” She winked and Johnny looked at Jaehyun who was so drunk that he didn’t mind staying with her.

“I don’t think-“

“Go home Johnny. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jaehyun turned away from Johnny to the woman and next thing he knew was how she sucked his dick in her bed.

Jaehyun couldn’t sleep at nights, whenever he closed his eyes he saw you and you followed him in his dreams. The painful look in your eyes was burned in his mind and every dream was about you and losing you. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want to wake up from another dream.

Do you stay up late, just so you don't dream?

Every time your lips touch another I want you to feel me I want you to feel me Every time you dance with somebody I want you to feel me I want you to feel me

Jaehyun spend nights with many different women under him. He tried to replace you, he tried to keep you off of his mind, but he failed every time.

He closed his eyes and pressed his lips on hers, he didn’t even remember her name but he also didn’t care. Jaehyun imagined you under him, he imagined your lips kissing him and your hands on his chest. Jaehyun’s favorite position was fucking from behind so he wouldn’t see their faces when he fucked them.

“F-Fuck Jaehyun.” She moaned when he sucked her neck and slowly fingered her.

“Don’t talk or I’ll stop.” He mumbled as he kissed her again to shut her up.

Jaehyun always told them to stop talking so he could imagine it was you he was fucking. Sometimes, your name slipped his lips but he didn’t care. If this is the only way he could feel you again, he wouldn’t stop.

Do your days get a little bit longer? Nights get a little bit colder? Heartbeat a little bit louder?

His friends were worried. Especially Johnny, his best friend.

Jaehyun would spend all of his free time in clubs and bars and drink until he couldn’t even walk properly. With no sleep, his days got longer and he felt stuck. Jaehyun felt like he was stuck and there was no escape. Every day was the same but the pain in his heart got worse and worse.

He was so drunk, he could hear his heartbeat in his ears and he thought he was going to die. Jaehyun really thought that it was the end of everything. The end of his suffering and the pain and the end of your story.

But when he woke up in the hospital, he knew that it wasn’t over. He still needs to suffer because you were also suffering for so long. Jaehyun knew that he needed to suffer more than you did, he knew he deserved all of this.

“Finally awake huh?” Johnny said.

Jaehyun looked to his left and saw Johnny sitting on the chair next to the bed.

“What happened?” Jaehyun couldn’t remember anything.

“Alcohol poisoning. You’ve been sleeping for three days.”

Jaehyun closed his eyes. His stomach hurt.

“I didn’t see her in my dreams. I didn’t see anything in my dreams. Maybe-“

“Don’t you fucking dare finish that sentence.” Johnny hissed.

Johnny knew that Jaehyun thought that this was the only way to sleep without dreaming of you.

“But-“

“No fucking buts, god, Jaehyun. Don’t you see how much you are destroying yourself?!” Johnny said a little louder.

“I deserve this.” Jaehyun whispered.

“No! No one deserves something like this. Okay, we both know you did some dumb shit, but why don’t you talk to her? We both know that she won’t kill you. Grow the fuck up now and face the fucking truth.”

Johnny was right.

Jaehyun is a coward.

He’s fucking scared to make things worse if that’s even possible.

Facing you? How could he do that? He couldn’t even look in the mirror, how could you look at him?

“I know where she lives, Jaehyun. And I can’t keep watching you destroy yourself more and more. Please, go talk to her.”

Jaehyun knew that sooner or later he had to talk to you. He always chose later but things got worse and he needs to do something.

When you're running, who you run to? Where do you go to hide? When she ain't giving you enough to get you through the night Won't be caught up in the middle Of your highs and your lows Baby, 'long as you're not with me, you'll always be alone

Do you stay up late, just so you don't dream?

After Jaehyun was released from the hospital, it took him two days to knock on your door.

It’s been months since you saw Jaehyun and when you opened the door, he was the last person you expected to see.

It was silent for almost ten seconds.

Jaehyun’s legs felt like jelly and his eyes got teary. You looked so beautiful, you were glowing. You looked so much healthier and just happier. Jaehyun didn’t know what to say and was so nervous he almost turned around and ran away.

“Jaehyun?”

Oh, how he missed to hear his name coming from your mouth.

“H-Hi.”

Hi? Seriously Jaehyun?!, he thought.

“What are you doing here?” you asked.

Jaehyun tried to talk but he was so fucking scared of saying anything wrong that he didn’t talk.

“Jaehyun?” you said his name again.

“I-I wanted to talk… to you… if that’s okay…” Jaehyun scratched his neck awkwardly.

“You want to talk?” you asked, still in shock that he was standing right in front of you.

“Y-Yes.”

“What do you want to talk about?” you leaned against your door, arms crossed in front of your chest.

“U-Us?” he said unsure.

“There is no us though?” you said, raising an eyebrow.

“I mean, about y-you and me.” You never saw Jaehyun this nervous.

“What is there to talk about? Oh, congratulations by the way, I heard you got married.” You said sarcastically.

Jaehyun gulped, he looked at you and licked his dry lips. “I-“

“Was it the girl you cheated on me with? Or someone else?”

“Y-you knew?” he thought you didn’t know that he cheated.

“Of course I knew. You really thought I’m a dumb little girl?” you spat.

“N-No never it’s j-just-“

“What? A secret you never wanted me to find out? So tell me Jaehyun, did you marry her?”

Jaehyun looked down and nodded. “I-I’m sorry.” He whispered.

“Did you get her pregnant?” you asked.

“No! I mean, no no it wasn’t like that.” He shook his head.

“So you married her because you loved her?”

“Fuck, I don’t know why I did that, I-I thought that after you broke up that she was the one and I t-think I was scared that she’d leave me too s-so I married her.” He explained but you just laughed at him.

“W-We aren’t together anymore. We got a divorce five months after the wedding.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“I just want to e-explain everything and… and I’m sorry. For everything. For everything I did and everything I didn’t do.”

“Come in. I don’t want to disturb my neighbors.” You really wanted to know why he did what he did.

Jaehyun smiled as you let him in.

He looked around your apartment and saw many pictures of you and your friends and family. When he looked at your couch, he saw a little cat sleeping.

“You have a cat?”

“Yes, cats don’t hurt people like humans do.”

Ouch, Jaehyun felt a pang in his chest.

“You can speak.” You said ignoring the look on his face.

“I met her when I was out with the boys, a-and I was drunk and next thing I knew I was in her b-bed and I-I couldn’t stop. I just couldn’t stop a-and we were together for so long I thought I needed something… new. It went like this for a year and then your broke up with me and I know that you had every right to do that after how I treated you. I kept the affair a secret because I couldn’t break up with you. I loved you and I wanted to have a family with you, you were my everything b-but I felt like I was stuck with you forever. We were dating for years a-and I needed something new, but I couldn’t let you go. I couldn’t stop either. I-I thought I’d stop seeing her one day and we would get married but I-I…” Jaehyun hid his face in his hands as he told you everything. “I-I didn’t want to lose you but in the end you still left me a-and I didn’t want to be alone so I married her and I swear to god I hate myself so much for doing that to you. I hate myself so much for hurting you like that.” He sobbed.

You didn’t say a word.

“T-There’s no one like you. Nobody is enough for me, they’re not y-you and I feel so, so fucking alone without you. My heart hurts and I can’t sleep. I don’t know what to do anymore. I need you so much, I miss you a-and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I can’t believe I-I lost someone as perfect and rare as y-you. I love you so much.” He whimpered.

He wiped his tears with the back of his hand and looked at you. Jaehyun’s eyes were bloodshot red and his lips were trembling, just like his hands.

You didn’t know what to say or to do or to think.

“Jaehyun, look. This, all of this is confusing me. And I really don’t know what you want me to say. You broke every promise, my trust, and my heart. You have no idea what I went through. You have absolutely no idea how hurt and broken I was. You’re suffering? You’re missing me? You’re crying because you are sad? How would you feel If you were me. How would you feel If I did that to you? Hm? This is not a game, this is real life, and you made your decisions. Jaehyun, you chose to hurt me. You chose to cheat on me and you chose to marry her. This had nothing to do with me. I loved you. I waited for you and I was always there for you.” Your voice was calm and you didn’t feel the need to cry but Jaehyun on the other hand was still crying and hating himself even more after he heard your words.

Jaehyun stepped closer to you but you didn’t move away and you looked down to the floor.

“D-Do you hate me?” He whispered.

“No.”

“So you still l-love me.” He hoped you did.

“No… Jaehyun-” you looked up with empty eyes.

This hurt Jaehyun even more. You felt nothing for him. Nothing.

“I love you, Y/n. And I will always love you. P-Please don’t let go of your love for me. Please love me, please- Y/n- please love me again. I can’t live a life without you. I can’t- I just can’t move on. I’ve been trying- I’ve really been trying to move on but it’s impossible. My heart screams for you and only you. I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry.” He hugged you tightly and you just let him, you didn’t know what else to do. “Please y/n. One last chance please. Y-You know what? L-Let’s get married. Right now. Marry me, Y/n. We’ve been waiting so long to get married, let’s do it now- please Y/n- marry me. Be my forever- please.” He cried out.

“Jae-“

“No, please no, just think about it. Just you and me. Forever. You and me forever that’s all I want. I’m ready y/n. I’m ready to spend eternity with you please give me one last chance to make things right. Please let me fix this and let me love you again.” Jaehyun cried his heart out as you slowly caressed his back.

“I-I know you still love me. D-deep inside you still love me. We’re meant to be together. Please give me a chance to show you how much I love you. Please marry me.”

“Jaehyun we can’t get married just like that.” You told him.

“B-but,” he let go off you to look at you, his face inches from yours, “So y-you still love me, right?” he looked hopefully at you.

“Jaehyun t-this isn’t as easy as you want this to be! I-I don’t trust you, I don’t know what you want me to say. Let’s forget everything and start over? It’s not working like that, relationships are more than just I love you’s! It took me so long to get back on feet, it took me so long to accept that you did this to us. I always blamed myself, I thought I did something wrong but it was always you. You’re the reason this relationship or whatever that was ended. So, I can’t just get back with you after everything I’ve been through. Not… Not like this.” Maybe it was time for you to cry, too. Tears fell down your eyes, you couldn’t hold them back anymore.

Remembering the pain you felt, the betrayal you felt and how miserable you were, hurt you.

“Jaehyun I was so fucking hurt y-you have no idea, I just wanted to die and n-never wake up.” You were the one sobbing now.

Your body stopped working and you fell in his arms. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” You heard him say.

“The love of my life married someone else, Jaehyun. You married someone else b-because you d-didn’t want to marry me… You didn’t w-want to marry me. You didn’t want me- y-you didn’t want me.” You repeated the last sentence over and over again and it felt like a knife was stabbed in his heart every time you said that.

Jaehyun held you in his arms as you were both sitting on the floor. This time he caressed your back and tried to clam you down. You bawled your eyes out and you hate to admit that, but you felt safe. You felt safe in Jaehyun’s arms.

“Y-You never l-loved me…” you whimpered.

“T-That’s not true, I always loved you. Do you remember the first time we met? You fell on your butt because we crushed into each other and ever since, I had this huge crush on you and when I asked you to be my girlfriend and you said yes, I was ready to fight the universe for you.”

“B-But y-you didn’t. You fought against m-me.”

If Jaehyun’s heart could break again, it would. He didn’t say anything, he couldn’t. He hates himself, how could he make you feel that way? How could he hurt you so much? How could he break you like this?

Jaehyun wished he could turn back time and change everything. But that was impossible. All he could do was do the right things now, it was his last chance to have a perfect future with you. 

“Please. One chance, all I need is one last chance to show you how much I love you. Let me fix this, please. Please let me treat you like how you deserve to be treated. Let me love you until my last day on earth.”

“I-I’m so scared, J-Jaehyun. So scared.” You whispered.

“Don’t be scared. I can’t lose you again- I won’t lose you again. I love you. I’m so in love with you.” Jaehyun pressed you against his chest and kissed your temple.

You looked up to him. His face so close to yours after months. It felt surreal, you couldn’t believe that it was really him, holding you so tightly because he was so scared that you’d slip away.

He wiped your tears with his thumb and leaned in. You closed your eyes and let him, after so many months, kiss you with his soft and warm lips. You could feel how much he longed for you just with a simple kiss. You could taste both of your salty tears in the kiss and neither of you stopped crying.

Allowing Jaehyun back in your life didn’t change anything about you. You were still confident and strong, and you could be confident and strong with Jaehyun, too. Jaehyun would never dare to take that away from you. He would never dare to hurt you and make you feel small or vulnerable. Jaehyun loves you and you slowly let him back into your life. Your breakup with Jaehyun helped you so much, no matter how much you suffered and how hurt you were. You learned how to love yourself and how important it is to put yourself first and that is something you’d never learn if you hadn’t gone through the breakup.

Feel me Feel me Feel me

[mingishoe]

𝓝𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓮𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓷 | 𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓮 [22]

Summary: You finally go to the studio with Mingi and Jongho and maybe Seonghwa isn't as scary as you thought...

Genre: social media au

Word Count: 2k

a/n: lowkey a filler but it's important for the next few chapters

You nervously looked out of the window as you, Mingi, and Jongho drove to the studio to meet up with Hongjoong.

You haven’t talked to him in a few days since the two of you kissed and you hope it’s not awkward. You don’t think it’s going to be but you never know until you’re in the same room as him.

“Y/n.. take a few breaths. It’ll be okay. I’ll try to be with you as much as possible, okay?” Mingi let one of his hands fall on your thigh as he squeezed it to comfort you.

“I would comfort you too but I don’t trust Mingi when he’s driving so…” Jongho pats you on the shoulder.

You’re ready to tell Mingi to just drop you off on the side of the street but before you were able to contemplate it any further, Mingi pulled into the parking lot. You look at Mingi with a pout, “Hey it’s okay. I’ll be with you as much as I can, yeah?”

Mingi had his arm wrapped around you as he led you to Hongjoong’s room. The door was opened and you took a deep breath as you walked in, “Hongjoong!”

With Mingi’s voice, Hongjoong turned around with a smile, “Mingi! It’s nice to see you again.” His eyes shifted to meet yours and you immediately looked away, “I’m glad you could make it, Y/n.”

You nodded with a soft smile as Hongjoong took you into a hug. Your arms wrap around him tightly and you almost don’t want to let go. It was only when Hongjoong rubs your side softly and whispers into your ear you feel at ease, “Hey, it’s okay. Seonghwa is gonna be late… and there’s no reason for us to be awkward, yeah?” Your grip on Hongjoong tightened before you nodded and pulled away.

You made your way to sit on the sofa as Jongho and Mingi sat with Hongjoong. You scrolled on your phone for a couple of minutes as you listened to the three of them talk softly about lyrics.

Right as you were about to all Mingi, the door opened. “Oh my God-” You immediately looked down to avoid all contact possible. When you look up, Seonghwa is standing in front of you and you immediately stand up, “Y/n! Nice to see you again.”

You let out an awkward laugh as you greet him. You were ready to bow but your entire body stiffens as Seonghwa pulls you into a hug. You let out a noise close to a squeak and Jongho laughs at your facial expressions, “Y-Yeah. Nice to- Nice to see you again.”

Hongjoong smiles at the two of you before leaning in to whisper in Mingi’s ear. You pull away from Seonghwa and your entire body is tingling. Seonghwa smiles at you and your heart feels like it’s about to fall out of your ass, “Mind if I sit with you?”

“Oh- uhh… nonono it’s okay. Here uh-” Everyone in the room watched you with amused expressions as you hurriedly grabbed your things to make room for Seonghwa.

“S’Okay. I don’t bite.” Seonghwa patted the seat next to him. You were still stand up as you looked around awkwardly. You immediately look towards Mingi and he looks as if he’s about to burst into tears from laughing so hard. He nods his head and you sit down while trying to hold in your laughter. You can’t believe this is happening.

You sat next to Seonghwa quietly as you looked down at your feet awkwardly. The three boys went back to talking so it was just you and Seonghwa. “So how did you meet them?”

You watched Seonghwa point to Jongho and Mingi. “Oh… we’ve been friends since we were little. I met Mingi when we were like 6 and then later we met Jongho when we were 8. I guess we’ve been friends since then so I’ve been here for their entire music career so…”

You look at the two of them with a smile and then back at Seonghwa, “That’s nice! I wish I had friends like that. The closest I have is Hongjoong over there, Yeosang, and Yunho. Do you know them?”

“Yeosang and Yunho?” Seonghwa nods, “Yeah. They’re both cool- I mean obviously I’ve never met them but…”

Seonghwa laughs softly but nods, “They are. I guess Hongjoong is too.”

“Hongjoong is! I think Hongjoong is really cool. Look at him… The way he dresses makes me jealous.” You pout but laugh soon after. You feel a large weight lift off of your shoulders as you feel a lot more comfortable.

“Do you want to go get some coffee or like something to eat?”

You blink at Seonghwa for a couple of seconds, “Like right now?”

“Yeah, Come on.” Seonghwa flashes you a smile before patting your knee. You stand up and look at Mingi with wide eyes like you’re asking for him to save you, “Hey we’ll be right back. Do y’all want anything?”

“I do! Go ahead and get me and Jongho an Americano.” You nod at Mingi and Hongjoong agrees.

Seonghwa guides you out, “We can go to the coffee shop next door. It’s really good, we go there all the time.” You stay quiet as you follow closely behind Seonghwa. Once you get outside it’s extremely crowded and your eyes widen as you’re suddenly worried someone will see you out with Seonghwa.

You grabbed onto Seonghwa’s arm as people crowd around the two of you and cameras flash around you and in both of your faces. Seonghwa pulled you towards him before the two of you pushed into the shop.

You weren’t fully able to comprehend what happened until Seonghwa brushed you off, “Are- are you okay?! I didn’t expect- I’m sorry. Are you hurt?”

You looked at Seonghwa with wide eyes before you slowly shook your head, “No- no I’m okay. I just didn’t expect that…” You hurriedly let go of Seonhwa with an awkward laugh, “Sorry-”

“I’ll go ahead and order… do you want anything else?” You shook your head as Seonghwa went to order.

What the actual fuck is happening. Your out getting coffee with Seonghwa?? And got mobbed by crazy fans???

You move to sit down at one of the tables and you watch Seonghwa as he orders. He smiles brightly at you as he brings a sandwich, “Here you go. I know you said you didn’t want anything but we can share.”

You nod and look down as you try to hide an obnoxiously large smile. He hands you your coffee as well as he sits down in front of you. You take a bite of the Sandwich that Seonghwa handed to you before you choke with wide eyes as there’s a flash right in your face, “Did you- Did you just take a picture of me?!”

Seonghwa’s face mimics yours as he looks just as surprised, “Yeah- sorry. I-” Seonghwa laughs loudly, “I didn’t know the flash was on.”

Your hand flings on your mouth as you start laughing, “Oh my- I mean- It’s okay.” Seonghwa’s face flushed in embarrassment, “So uh… does that happen often?” you refer to the mob that was outside.

Seonghwa shakes his head, “No! And I’m really sorry that happened! This is the first time this has happened in like a good 6 months… whenever we go back just stay close.”

The two of you sit in comfortable silence before the rest of the drinks are finished. Seonghwa wraps his arm around your waist and you tense up. You hold onto Seonghwa tightly as the two of you leave the cafe.

Almost immediately cameras flashed in your face and people crowded around you and Seonghwa. You attempted to hide your face in Seonghwa’s arm as he pulls you closer to him. You can hardly focus on your surroundings because the only thing you can feel is Seonghwa’s touch.

Your eyes were squeezed shut and you let Seonghwa guide you before he whispered softly in your ear, “It’s okay. I got you. We’re almost there.”

Songhwa hurriedly types in the password before the two of you push it in. Neither of you let go of the other but you pull your head away from his side and clear your throat. His arm is still wrapped around your waist and you’re still gripping onto his shirt as the two of you walk back into the studio with the rest of the boys.

Once you walk in all eyes turn to you. Mingi and Jongho have big eyes and you look at them with even wider eyes. You pull away from Seonghwa and take the drinks from him, “Here you go.”

Mingi stands up and pulls you with him as he sits on the sofa. He pulls you on top of him to sit on his lap and wrap his arms around you. Hongjoong and Seonghwa watch the two of you for a minute before looking at Jongho with a puzzled look.

Your arm is wrapped around Mingi as he whispers in your ear, “What the fuck was that?”

“We got like mobbed- he’s a celebrity, remember?” You whisper back and Mingi pushes you gently as he rolls his eyes.

“You were getting mobbed on the entire walk back into the room?” Mingi raises his eyebrows at you.

“Well no… but- but like I don’t know?!” You and Mingi both burst out in laughter and you throw your head in his neck.

“What did I tell you? You and Seonghwa…” Mingi wiggles his eyebrows seductively as he makes a kissy face at you.

“Stop! I can‘t stand you! Now be quiet and what about you and him over there…” you tilt your head to Hongjoong as you exaggerate winks, “He’s nice isn’t he?”

“Bye- get off of me.” Mingi jokingly pushes you off of him before pulling you back into him, “I mean yeah but is he… ya know…”

You swallow harshly as the image of the two of you making out pops in your mind, “I don’t know? Maybe he- I‘ll find out for you.”

Mingi’s eyes go wide, “No!! Don’t like ask- I don’t want him to think I’m weird or anything!”

“Hey, Mingi-“ Jongho had called Mingi so you slid off of his lap. As Mingi moved, Seonghwa took the place next to you.

“Hey uh… I don’t mean to like jump to conclusions or anything but you and Mingi… are dating or…?” Seonghwa leans in close to you as he whispers.

You completely stop in your tracks as you look at Seonghwa with a puzzled expression, “Sorry?! Me and Mingi?” you literally laughed in his face, “No- I mean we joke with around but he’s- uh… we’re just friends.”

“Oh okay cuz it looked a little bit… yeah and then you and Hongjoong so I was a little confused.” Seonghwa’s eyes immediately widen and his mouth slightly parts.

You immediately turn to look at Hongjoong, “Right- me and Hongjoong… You know that was like nothing right? The heat of the moment and like we talked about it so like.” Your face gets hot and you stand up, “Hey uh, I have to go.”

“And you’re going to get home how?” Mingi raises his eyebrows at you.

“Seonghwa take her home.” Hongjoong pipes up and reaches for his keys in his pocket.

“Nonono it’s okay. I can call someone…” You attempt to stop Hongjoong but he successfully gives his keys to Seonghwa. You stand awkwardly before you take Hongjoong and Mingi into a hug. You ruffle Jongho's hair before you and Seonghwa walkout.

Seonghwa guides you through the back door and the two of you go into Hongjoongs car, “I didn’t make you uncomfortable or anything, did I?”

You shake your head, “Nonono. I’m just tired. It’s nap time.”

Seonghwa laughs softly, “No I totally get that. Naps are my favorite. Um but I wanted to tell you that I’m having a party- hang out this weekend with a couple of friends and I wanted to know if you wanted to come? Mingi, Jongho, and the rest of your friends can come too, of course.”

Your eyes widen, “Oh! That seems like so much fun… if it’s not a burden of course.”

“Of course not. I’d love to see you there.”

♡ masterlist ♡ previous ♡ next ♡

@wootf @thelargefrye @ateezappreciation @hwaseongsbabie @flowerboykun @jin-neck-shaft @etherealbyeol @alliecoady98 @dazity @yunkiwii @nervousfestivalcashdonut @sunwooyoung @jung-wooyoungie @nycol-ie @multistan-net @jeonjungkaka @skmoonchild @lauraneuuh @a-soft-hornytiny @sktbzc0re @saxtaee @songminji @funkywinkyboy @hoerangdan @uwu-minho @cixrosie @lizcvcks @empirxn @yunhoscafe @luckyjoongie

[onmyyan]

Hi its me again. I love your writing and the fact that there isn't as much abuse like there is in others. It reminds me of old yandere stories were it was genuine lovesickness. Anyway, how do you think jjba yanderes would react to a darling that is taller and more muscular than them by quite a bit. You can do whoever you like I don't mind.

A/N: Omg ily🥺 it means a lot you said all that because I really love this genre it’s my comfort trope anyway thank you for the request n I hope ya like it!! Kira should be a trigger warning in an of itself but dw he’s just weird, not mean. Mentions of his past ‘girlfriends’, a curse word or two, lil suggestive in someplace’s Mista murks a few people, tw//gun violence

Characters: Pt2 Joseph, Josuke, Kira, Mista

Joseph was used to looking down on people, standing at a proud 6’5” he was literally and figuratively knocked on his ass when he’d first laid eyes on you, his immediate thought was you were a forgotten pillarman coming from nowhere to get revenge for your masters only to quickly realize you were just a stallion. You were strong enough to put him on his back after one too many cheeky comments. Unafraid to speak your mind and keep him in check, You would stare down at him with that mind melting smirk, all too aware of his frustrations, you assumed he was just being a man, ashamed to be outclassed by someone other than himself, oh honey how wrong you were. You enjoyed teasing the behemoth of a man as no one else really could, at least not as well as you did, throughout your little jabs and snark he always had a retort, a response on the tip of his tongue, eager to do this dance of yours until one of you broke, to you he was a way too cocky dangerously self assured pretty boy who was entertainingly easy to rile up, but to Joseph, you were his everything. Someone he could proudly take home to Granny Erina once he’d finally tamed you. He had a plan, a three step plan to steal your heart just as you’d done his, and this little game of who could annoy the other the most was just step 1. “It’s been fun JoJo but you’re gonna have to find someone else to bother.” You’d jokingly said one day out of the blue, an odd friendship had formed through the month you’d been in town and it felt wrong to leave without notice, an act of kindness you’d learn to regret. “Is this one of your famous jokes (Y/n)? Not so funny to play with a mans heart like that I nearly believed you.” He finished with a scoff, his signature smirk not reaching his eyes. “It’s true Joseph, my flight leaves tomorrow, I didn’t wanna leave without saying goodbye, because as much as we fuck around you’re pretty fun to hang out with.” Your sincerity almost made him feel bad about rushing the next few steps of his plan, he’d have to cram months of planning into a night but he’d accomplished more with less time on his side. He huffed, his grin stretched wide across his handsome features. “Then we outta make tonight count eh?” A thick arm was tossed around your neck, you had to bend awkwardly for this to be possible much to your amusement. “Okay you weirdo, whatever you say.” You let him lead you around town with a grin, unaware you’d be missing that plane, and any other one you tried to take without him.

Josuke watched you eat with the dopiest grin on his face, he’d spent an extra hour in the mirror this morning in preparation for your first official date! Well you didn’t exactly know it it was a date and Okayasu was eating rather messily beside you two but still! You’d actually agreed to come to Toni’s with him! You’d been an enigma since you transferred to the bizarre town, choosing to keep to yourself, and despite the intimidating height and mass you possessed, he saw through your act in seconds. There was a huge softie under all that muscle, he’d watched you enough to know this as a fact, you were a gem and he was intent on showing you his appreciation and adoration for the rest of his days, a vow he’d silently taken the day you’d stolen his heart, the moment was brief in reality but it lasted forever in his mind, you smiled at him in passing, he could feel time slow down, everyone around you faded in the background, a backdrop to the beginning of your story. He could imagine telling your kids how you’d met, something about the way you’d stare down at him, eyes sharp and attentive, like you truly listened when people spoke, your laugh was loud when it was real and every time he heard it he felt 10 years added to his lifespan. At the same time that icky feeling at another person making you laugh was conflicting, he’d never been in love before but he suddenly understood why his mom had never given up on his dad, love was weird but he wouldn’t give it up for anything. You’d accidentally snapped your chopsticks laughing too hard at a joke he’d tossed out, your face scrunched in embarrassment before chuckling at yourself and switching to a fork, his stand came out on its own, pocketing the shards to fix later, a new item for his ever growing collection, what a cute little memento from your first date! His thoughts swirled happily with the stories you’d be telling your kids. Thankfully neither of you noticed his little pickpocket moment, dangerous plans forming as he stared at you with those misleadingly soft puppy dog eyes.

Kira could die in this moment, happily I might add, as your firm but soft hand was wrapped oh so deliciously around his throat threatening to crush it with ease at the slightest movement. He’d been watching you for a while now, the longest he’d ever spent on someone he didn’t plan to kill, it become sort of hobby he’d picked up recently, the morally upsetting activity bringing peace to his day to day, usually he used his stand to carefully observe your routine, eager to learn all he could about his future spouses likes and desires, but he was getting greedy. Of course he could always introduce himself but he resisted, knowing there was a time and place to get exactly what he wanted. He liked to think he knew everything about you by now, your favorite color, how you liked your coffee, your love for cats, but he didn’t anticipate this. You were much more observant than he’d given you credit for, while you couldn’t see his stand you could sense yourself being watched, and seeing the large blonde lurking indiscriminately in the crowds throughout the day was enough to set you off. So you trailed off into the less crowded parts of town quickly entering an alleyway, he followed in pure confusion only to be roughly slammed into the wall, his stand came out on reflex but simply stared at his attacker, it seemed almost confused as what to do. “Why the hell are you following me pretty boy?” His eyes rolled to the back of his head at the feel of your fingers tightening, god he’d never felt this rush of exhilaration, none of his past ‘girlfriends’ could pull such an illicit reaction from him with a simple touch. When he didn’t answer you simply scoffed and tossed him aside like it was nothing. You left with a threat to stay out of your sight, yet all he could do was smile, the faint imprint of your fingers burned in his skin deliciously, how lucky could one man get?

Mista observed you with hungry eyes. His stare was unapologetically locked on your form. He made no intention to hide his attraction for you. The day you’d joined Buccarati’s crew was the day his world flipped. He assumed his new teammate would be no one to fuck with based on what Bruno told him about your stand, but when you walked in? Needing to bend down slightly just to enter the doorway had him sweating in his seat. He didn’t know what to say as he watched you happily interact with his fellow teammates, immediately you blended with the group, but all that was running through his mind were all the fun things you could do with those muscles. He usually stayed silent around you, not out of dislike as one would assume from his piercing gaze, but fear of accidentally voicing one of those nasty thoughts kept him quiet. You didn’t seem to mind though, always including him in the conversation, you even understood his very valid fear of that dreaded number! How could god plop such a perfect person in his lap and expect him to not do anything about it? Alas, Bruno had specifically told them not to make you uncomfortable with any flirting so he bit his tongue. Your aura was calming, a contrast to your powerful stand, speaking of, he couldn’t get his under control. Whenever they could Sex Pistols was out and all over you. They climbed and clamored for your attention, thankfully you didn’t seem to mind, always entertained their antics when you could, even giving each one a small peck when they wouldn’t let you leave for a mission without Mista, to say he was done for was an understatement, it took one mission going foul for his resistance to snap. His stand moved faster than it ever had, piercing the skulls of the idiots who brought you pain. He left the last one slowly bleeding out kneeling down to wipe the matted hair from your forehead, “You okay baby? Don’t worry honey I’ll make the bastard hurt.” He spoke not breaking eye contact, his hand pointed behind him, grip steady as he unloaded in the poor fool who thought it was a good idea to make you bleed, the wound was small, not even deep enough to trouble Giorno but that didn’t matter to Guido, any slight against you was disrespecting the future parent of his children, and what kind of man would he be if he didn’t defend your honor?

[amor-immortalem]

You’re Important to Me

Warnings: thoughts and ideations of the un-aliving variety

Genre: Angst but it gets a lil fluffy at the end

Pairing: Mammon x oc

Summary: The way the witches and his brothers treat him leaves Mammon feeling replaceable and unimportant. His human takes it upon herself to try and make him feel better after finding out something heartbreaking.

A/N: since I hit 150 followers either last night or the day before, I figured I would do something a little different for tonight’s post and give y’all a little 2 part fic instead of art. I haven’t written in a long time and this is not proofread so please excuse any typos. I’m a little rusty.

Part 2| Part 3| Part 4

———————————————————————-

Another day full of studying for upcoming exams at RAD completed and Arella couldn’t be more greatful to finally shut her texts books. Sure, she technically didn’t have to meet the same standards as her demon classmates this time around, but if only one thing could be said about Arella, it was that she was a perfectionist at heart. She’d put in the hard work to get the best possible score- seeing the look of surprise on Satan’s face as she scored better than him would be worth it too, as much as a pipe dream that that would be.

With a soft yawn, Arella pushed away from her desk before grabbing a nightshirt she had stolen borrowed from her boyfriend and stumbled to her bathroom for a quick shower. As she brushed her teeth, she could feel a presence enter her room- well more like she could hear him. Mammon was never all that quiet or stealthy to begin with as much as he’d like to claim otherwise.

Peeking out from the small ensuite, she saw the demon sprawled out on her bed, his face buried in her pillows. Something didn’t feel right. Deciding the shower could wait, Arella made her way across the room to where the bed was located.

“Hey,” She started, gently placing a hand on his back to let him know she was there, “I thought you said you’d be out late with the Witches. Did something happen?”

“Not really….” Mammon starts, his voice muffled by the pillows before he turned to face her. “They got all they could get out of me so they jus’ let me go and I wasn’t havin’ a good time anyway so I jus’ came home….”

Arella frowned at his tone. He sounded upset, depressed almost.

“An’ then the moment I walk in the door, Lucifer’s on my ass ‘bout some stupid fuckin’ bill that came in…. So I got to sit there ‘n listen to him go on an’ on about how I’m such a fuck up and what worthless scum I am, not to mention the rest of my brothers took the first chance they could to hop on the bandwagon and I’m….. I’m just so tired.” At this, Mammon flops over onto his back, throwing an arm over his face.

“Mammon…” Her voice is soft, full of concern as tries unsuccessfully to pull his arm away so she could look him in the eyes.

“Arella, Am I important….?” Mammon asks as he tries -but fails- to hide the way his voice cracks. “Would everyone just be happier if I was….. gone?”

Its that question that shatters her heart to tiny fragments.

“Wha- Of course you are, Love. Why would you say that? I know your brothers take things too far sometimes but they’d be devastated if something happened to you. I would be heartbroken if anything happened to you. We all love you so much, Honey….”

“It doesn’t feel like it,” Mammon barked out a laugh that sounded bitter. “Not with the way they rag on me like they do…. Actually, they’d probly be jumpin’ for joy if I were to off myself- don’t know why I ain’t done it already….”

“Mammon, don’t talk like that. You’re scaring me.”

“Its true though. If I take myself out, then they won’t ever have to deal with the consequences when I fuck up. Won’t have to worry ‘bout me stealin’ their shit to get my hands on some extra grimm.

“Stop it right now, please.”

“It’s not like they’d miss me much anyway. You probly would but let’s face it, ya could do so much better than me anyway... Ya know, I got this pills that I swiped the other day, plannin’ ta sell ‘em an’ all but I think-“

“Mammon, stop!” Arella pressed her hands over his mouth to keep him from finishing his sentence “Please. No more….. No…. More.”

She collapsed down to his chest as violent sobs erupted from her. She had lost someone to suicide before, she couldn’t and wouldn’t go through that again- especially not with the person who was most important to her.

“I’m here for you. I will always be here fir you.,” Arella tightened her hold on the demon beneath her, her body still shuddering with each breath she took in a miserable attempt to compose herself. “So please. Please just don’t do it.”

At her tears, the demon could only react with silence. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting when letting his feelings out but it wasn’t a reaction like this.

Maybe part of him was hoping for her to agree with him and let her words feed into his terrible mood, or maybe part of him wanted Arella to scold him for daring to even think about taking his own life but there wasn’t any part of him that wanted her to react with sobs and wails, with her begging him not to go through with it.

Slowly, Mammon brought his arms to wrap around her, holding her tight against his chest. They were quiet for a long while as they just held each other.

“I’m….. I’m sorry….” Mammon was the first to speak, to break the silence that had suddenly become suffocating. “I don’t know what I was talking about….”

Arella didn’t reply right away, choosing instead to hold him just a little tighter a bit long.

“Do you feel better now that you’ve talked about what’s going through your mind?” She lifted her head from its place on his chest to look him in the eyes for the first time that night.

She smiled softly as he nodded, leaning down to press a kiss to his cheek. “You’re so important both to your brothers and to me. There’s no one like you in the all of the three realms. If you weren’t here our lives would be so much darker and so much more boring, do you know that?”

“Yeah, I doubt that.”

“No it’s true,” Arella hums, as she pushes his hair back and places a peck to his forehead. “You want to know something else?”

“What?” Mammon arches a brow, “if it’s something cheesy, I’m leaving.”

Arella laughs at that. “I love you more than anything in this life or the next, and, no, you’re staying in here where I can see you.”

“What? C’mon, babe, I won’t do anything stupid, so don’t worry ‘bout me. And the last thing I need is Lucifer gettin’ at me because I spent the night in here when I shoulda been in my room.”

“Then I won’t give you a choice.” She starts matter of factly, “I’m invoking our pact. You’re sleeping in my room tonight where I can keep you close and pamper you all night. Also you’re going to tell me where you’ve hidden those pills you were talking about earlier and if their in one of your safes, you’re going to tell me the combination to it.”

“Arella, I-“ he groaned starting to complain

“No. This is important, Baby. I’m doing this because I care. Not to mention if Lucifer were to somehow find you in possession of those pills….. his rage would be so great that not even I would be able to stand between you two.”

Another moment of silence happened between them as Arella’s orders went into effect. Mammon let out a soft, discontented growl before finally breaking the silence.

“Fiiiiine. They’re in the safe that’s hidden in my pool table. The combination it 0127. Happy?”

“Very.” She replies cheerily. “Now, you’d better get comfortable, sir, because I’m going to remind The Great Mammon just how amazing, how wonderful , how special, and how loved he is.”

“Whatever, you dork, jus’ get off a me so I can move to a better spot.” He huffed as he shifted around under her, trying to hide the faint blush was already threatening to make itself at home of his cheeks.

———————————————————————-

Masterlist 2

[side-writes-fanfics]

“Could you just fuck off?” || One-shot

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x fem!reader

Word count:  ≈1700 words

Genre: angst (slightly less at the end)

Tw: mention of death and (accidental) homicide, crying, therapy, yelling

Summary: You’ve been out of the field for four years. A traumatic event caused you to retire and live the rest of your days away from curses to the best of your abilities. At the last year of college you finally feel like life has taken a turn and maybe you’ll be able to feel at peace with yourself once more. However, your happiness was interrupted by the man himself and his new student.

Feel free to leave a or two or more request in my asks!

Masterpost | Asks/Requests

ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ

You were a ex-jujutsu sorcerer. Some take the day you took your leave as retirement, having done a plethora of work in the years you were active. Others, however, took it as you quitting and running away from your mistakes and problems. That didn’t bother you though. You left that life for reasons important to you and are now, four years later, you were on your last exams of your educational degree and you felt no guilt about leaving. Of course, the reasons you left will haunt you until the day you die.

You swore off using your techniques ever since you left as well. Nothing from that life remained anymore, and you wanted to keep it that way. You may still remember a few tricks here and there, but you haven’t used them since the day you resigned and you never will. 

Sitting in your dorm room, drinking a(n) [favourite unhealthy drink] and staring at the same papers you had been staring at for the past week, you prepare for this week's exam. This exam meant it all and if you flunked this one, your educational career would continue on for a little while longer with a little bit more pain.

 As you began to revise your papers one more time, your roommate called out for you: “(Y/N)!?”

“Yeah!?

“There’s some people here to see you!” An eyebrow raised at her response. No one ever came to visit you these days unless you asked them to. They knew you were going to be busy for a little while so they knew it was best to let you be and focus on your work. 

“Just send them into my room, please!” As three pairs of footsteps walk closer to your door, you hastily rush to scribble down the last bits of information you needed to revise one more time. The door opened while the chair twirled around at your command to reveal your roommate opening the door to let the people in. “Thanks Emi!” you say in a cheerful tone as but your face and joy quickly dropped spotting a very familiar man behind her. “You can leave us be now.” she listened to you, closing the door on her way out. 

“What the absolute fuck are you doing here.” you say, begging the dear lord to wake you up from this hellish nightmare. 

“(Y/N)-chan! How’ve you been in the time you were away from me, sis?” Gojo said, making your blood boil in anger. Still, you kept your cool as best as you could.

“Do not call me that or I’ll throw you out of the apartment myself. I am and never was your sister.” You crossed your arms, taking his presence in more carefully. He hasn’t changed a bit since the last time you saw him. He only looked older, more mature almost, but he still kept that young charm he’d had since the day you two met. However, you know well that this man hasn’t aged a single year when it comes to mental age. He has and always will be the egocentric dickhead you knew back then. 

“Well you’ve changed a lot, got a little kick to ya now.” He teased, letting out a chuckle. Your eyes wandered away from him and to the figure behind him. A young boy. Pink hair; tall-ish; looked way older than he most likely was. He had little scars under his eyes that you noticed instantly. ‘I wonder what those are…’ you thought, but kept it to yourself.

“Who’s the kid?” you asked, not taking your eyes off of him. Something didn’t feel right. You just knew his aura was off. 

“Oh right! I didn’t introduce you to my student! (Y/N), this is Yuuji Itadori. Yuuji, this is (Y/N), the nice lady I told you we were here to get.” As Yuuji waved to you and said something, you became confused. 

“You’re here to get me?” only a seconds pause happened before you connected the dots. “No.”

“Please, (Y/N), we need-”

“You don’t need me for shit.” 

The two of you argued back and forth quietly enough not to disrupt your roommate while Yuuji stood there confused and slightly scared. Neither of you was going to give up, strongly believing that they were going to win for their reasons were valid. This carried on for five minutes before your temper snapped.

“ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GOING TO COME TO MY APARTMENT AFTER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED? FOUR YEARS WENT BY, WHY COULDN’T YOU ALL JUST FORGET ABOUT ME AND MOVE ON!” You screamed at him, causing both of the males to flinch. Neither of them expected this from you. Yuuji heard about you from his sensei and never once did he mention you having burst like this and that was because… well… Gojo never saw you like this. You never were like this before. When he worked with you and studied with you, you always managed to keep yourself calm, no matter the situation.

“Yuuji can you… go talk to Emi for a bit. I think (Y/N) and I need to talk about this alone…” Gojo asked Yuuji and while Yuuji wanted to stay and find out why she was like she was right now, he knew that he would only cause trouble to both of them.

“The only thing I’m over is jujutsu and being a sorcerer.” your words shot through him with a feeling he’s never felt.

Once the door closed, both of you stood/sat there in silence for a moment, gathering your thoughts up. Gojo was the first to break it, letting a sigh escape his lips. “I thought you were going to be over it…”

“It’s been four years… Please… Come back...” Gojo held back his cocky remarks, knowing that they could ruin a chance in convincing you. They really did need you at that moment and without you, a lot of people would die. The only problem is that you thought differently. Still shaken up over the reason you quit.

“Yeah, it’s been four years. So?” She spat, “Do you know that in those four years, going to therapy twice a week barely made a dent in the guilt and hatred I’ve been feeling ever since that day. I’ve been lying to her, trying to tell her as much as I could without revealing anything about curses and all that bullshit, but after four years of constantly trying to feel at peace and feel like I wasn’t the cause of everything that happened I still feel like a criminal who doesn’t deserve to walk this planet.”

“(Y/N), you know The Incident wasn’t your fault.”

The room fell silent. Gojo couldn’t say anything. He physically couldn’t break himself out of the guilt he began to feel. Slowly, carefully chosen words began to come out of his mouth. “Sorry if this isn’t the right moment, but… Can I ask you something?”

“It wasn’t my fault!? Gojo, 17 people died because of me. 30 people were crushed to death because of my poor evaluation and aim. You cannot tell me I wasn’t responsible for those deaths!” tears threatened to fall off her cheeks at any moment, but she tried to remain strong. “And even if you still believe that I am not at fault, the meer fact that I couldn’t handle death, after everything I’ve been through, death still hurts me and taunts me and makes me feel guilty even if there’s nothing else I could have done. And for that I don’t deserve to be called a jujutsu sorcerer. Because as a jujutsu sorcerer you have to be prepared to face death each and every single day and I, (Y/N) (L/N), cannot do that.” you didn’t even feel yourself beginning to cry but you weren’t going to acknowledge it. “Do what you will, but I am never again going on the field and causing more harm than good.”

“Sure, why not.”

“Do you… still see curses?” You nod. “So you see the curse on your roommates back each and every single day, yeah?” You nod once more. “And the thing in the corner of your room?” both of your gazes shift to the corner.

“He’s just chilling there.” the words came out cold. Gojo instantly knew you were lying. 

“Are you sure about that?” You didn’t want to admit that both of those slimy little creatures annoyed you. They annoyed you like crazy. But in reality you were too scared to exercise either of them. Your gaze shifts downwards, averting itself from Gojo. He caught you. He caught you in a straight up lie. You still saw it all, you could not not see it. Every day, every hour you see the curses around you; next to you. But you tried to ignore them because of internal fear you felt. You didn’t hate jujutsu, you were scared of them. Your internal hatred started as a coping method to help you through the feelings you couldn’t tell anyone. Tears began to fall faster as you tried to breathe. Though, that breath turned into a silent sob. Your world came crashing down as you realised that the reality was you weren’t happy. You were terrified. But that fear became a norm to you. Something you couldn’t escape. And now that you realised it, everything came in like a bomb, spiraling out of control. The veil was lifted over your eyes, allowing you to see the mess your life actually was. The realisation you lived with two things you were supposed to hate the most. You lived with a curse, no, TWO curses, and you did absolutely nothing to get them out of your life even though you could.

Gojo approached you, hugging you softly. This was the first time you two had seen each other in 4 years and he already had to comfort you. He didn’t even have infinity around him, knowing you couldn’t hurt a fly. Some people put up an act but he knew you weren’t one of those people. Even after a long time you were still the same old (Y/N) he knew.

“You don’t have to come back if you don’t want to, we just thought you would be the best solution to our problem.” Gojo said as he softly rubbed circles in you back while you silently cried into his shoulder. “If you’re not up for it, I’m sure there’s another way”

“What do you need?” you mumbled into him.

“Excuse me?”

“What do you need me to help with?” Gojo paused to realise what you said before smirking. He hugged you tightly before explaining the situation to you. 

ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ

[hongism]

put in place - c. san 18+

day 9: spit play - choi san warnings: explicit smut, oral sex: m, deepthroating, face-fucking, spit play, spit in mouth, humiliation/degradation, cum swallowing, dirty talk, hard dom san, pls pay attention to tags this one is intense compared to my other stuff!!, also talk about this stuff with your partner before you do it, talk about boundaries!, what’s okay and what’s not!, the underlying understanding her is that san and reader have a relationship where they agreed to this and are both comfy with it! wc: 1.5k genre: pwp, smut, 18+

“I didn’t give you permission to look up.” San pushes your chin to the side with his index finger, forcing you to look over to the wall instead. You bite back the small whimper that threatens to fall from your lips. It’s a desperate attempt to gain back a sliver of control, but at this point, you aren’t sure whether you want any control at all. San drags his fingers through your hair, gripping tight at the roots to where it leaves a pleasant burn across your scalp. You let him push your head around a bit more all while trying to keep your eyes off him until he gives you permission to do so. “So the slut knows how to listen after all. Fascinating. Couldn’t listen to me earlier.”

He pushes your head away, and you jerk with the motion. When he grabs hold of your chin again, it’s in a tight grip that pulls you forward, but you snap your eyes shut rather than looking at him. It is exactly what San wants, and you hear the slight chuckle that passes through his lips in acknowledgment. Something wet hits your face a second later. You release a choked moan when you realize what San just did; his spit trickles down your cheek and catches where he’s still gripping your face. The sound betrays you, and San once again shoves your face away from him.

“Remind me of what you did wrong, whore,” he commands. You can almost picture the way he lifts a brow and grins down at where you kneel before him.

“I came before you, sir,” you recite for the third time this night alone.

“And?”

“And I teased sir in front of others.”

“Good girl,” he hums. “Look at me.” You do as asked in an instant, snapping your chin back towards San and looking him in the eye. Those dark eyes are clouded with lust and desire, but you can’t figure out what is going on in his head. The glint is almost playful, which means that he’s about to give you something you want, something you like, and sure enough – his lips purse, and he hurls another wad of spit at your face. You barely flinch as it hits your forehead this time, lashes fluttering but staying open and remaining on San. “Where do you want my cock, kitten? I’ll even be kind enough to let you choose.”

You opt not to respond with words and instead let your jaw go slack, tongue poking out as you put your mouth on display for San. He huffs a laugh through his nose then presses three fingers into your awaiting mouth.

“Such a good little slut,” he coos. His fingers pump in and out of your mouth like it’s his cock, and you give the same amount of attention and fervor in return. He keeps that hand deep in your mouth while he tugs at the band of his sweatpants, pulling the material down along with his underwear so that his cock springs loose. Despite wanting to take him between your lips and suck him to high heaven right away, you wait for permission to do anything, already too overwhelmed by the control he exudes. “You want me to fuck your mouth? Use you like the hole you are?”

“Yes, sir, p-please.” You try your best to speak around his fingers, but he keeps pushing down on your tongue. It triggers your gag reflex, causing you to choke on saliva, and San huffs out a loud laugh at your struggling. He slips his fingers out of your mouth. You jump at the opportunity to speak clearly, rushing your words to get your point across, “Use me, sir. I’ll be good for you I promise.”

“I know you will,” he hums. “That’s all my little slut is good for, after all.”

The word have you whimpering, shoulders drawing together almost painfully. San presses forward, and his cock hits your mouth. Precum smears over your wet and swollen lips. He doesn’t need to give the order for you to know what he wants; it’s what you want too so you drop your jaw and take him halfway into your mouth in one swift movement. He groans as your wet heat envelops him, head tipping back to expose the sweat that paints his neck. His hand snakes around the back of your neck to dangle in the hair by your nape. It effectively renders you useless, and you release the tension in your face so that he can fuck your face with ease. San rocks his hips forward, dick careening further into your mouth until he hits the back of your throat. You choke around him, a small noise of complaint follows, and San quickly pulls out of you to look into your eyes. He waits and waits without saying anything. It takes a bit for you to realize that he’s waiting for a verbal confirmation from you, so you provide it through a gasp and a stutter.

“I’m o-okay, I’m okay. I wanna keep go-going. Can we keep going?”

San offers a gentle smile in return and nods. The softness in his features dissipates the next second, and he slams his cock back into your mouth. You’re more prepared for it this time, taking him deeper without choking, and you try your best to just focus on relaxing your throat around his member. It works like a charm. With San controlling the pace and your mouth, you just sit back and concentrate on breathing when you can and staying loose for him. Each time his cock breaches your throat, you tighten a little – an involuntary reaction that you can’t keep from doing, but San appreciates the way your throat squeezes his tip. Precum dribbles down as well, leaving a salty and bitter burn in the back of your mouth.

More than arousal and pleasure, there remains a lingering pit of shame in your gut. Embarrassment at how much you love this kind of treatment from San, and how much you love it when he calls you names. Just how filthy the whole thing is causes humiliation to burn in your stomach, but at the same time it’s that humiliation that heightens your arousal and makes you squeeze your thighs together to get some sort of pressure on your clit. San’s thrusts maintain their brutal pace, and he fucks into your mouth with reckless abandon until they grow sloppy and staggered. His breathy moans and gasps have fallen into a state of disarray, and they aren’t even coherent at this point. Thus, it doesn’t surprise you when San spills hot cum down your throat with his next thrust, cock twitching deep inside you and hips coming to a halt. You can only release a quiet whine and gulp the semen down like it’s your last meal.

“Good girl,” San purrs from above you, and he brings his fingers forward to brush the sweat off your forehead. Those same fingers slip down to tug at your lips, and he pulls his cock from your used mouth with a sigh. “Keep it open.”

Your jaw remains limp as San bends over you with his mouth hovering about a foot above yours. The gleam in his eyes remains ever-playful, and you don’t dare look away. Then, he pokes his tongue out, and spit is suddenly dribbling onto your awaiting tongue. The humiliation you feel grows tenfold because you clench your legs so tight that it causes an unexpected orgasm, and you hunch over as you cum, shoulders trembling the whole time. San is just as caught off-guard as you are, a laugh of disbelief slipping out, and he squats down to be eye level with you.

“You’re such a slut for me, it’s unbelievable. Right when I think you can’t get any more desirable and perfect, you prove me wrong,” he murmurs, letting his gaze slip over your features. You’re still recovering from your orgasm when he leans over you and presses the softest kiss imaginable to your forehead. “I love you so much.”

...

a/n: dhuiagfdygafgjkhgfkdhlj nice!

link to kinktober masterlist

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unable to be tagged: @sailing-goddess-of-ateez @gingerale-addict

[oikadori]

A/N: No one asked for this but I really wanted to write some angsty fic...so this is the outcome of listening to Callum Scott and Conan Gray for three full days asfkasjk sorry this is the longest thing I’ve written Hope you like it!

Miya Atsumu x f!Reader

Summary: He was your best friend and she was perfect, but still you fell for him

Genre: angst, unrequited love 

Warnings: self-doubt, insecurity, swearings 

Now playing: Dancing On My Own, Heather 

WC~2,6K

You should already be used to hear it, but every time Atsumu let out a booming laugh you couldn’t help staring at him with dreamy eyes.

“Oi, Y/N!  Are you even listening to me?” his hazel eyes open, looking at you playfully.

“Yes, I’m hearing you, and no, it wasn’t as funny as you think” he frowns, pushing you from your chair almost making you fall if it wasn’t for his quick grip on your forearm, “You asshole!”

“Why so harsh on me today, sweetheart?”

Yo feel your stomach twist at the nickname, making Atsumu smile at the way your cheeks get a dark red.

“Because you were a total dick with those poor girls” he sighs, tired, stretching his arms behind his head, “You could’ve been nicer, you know?”

Biting your lip, you remember the teary eyes of those girls as they ran away sobbing after they had told him their love confession. Would you have the same luck if- No, no way you had a crush on him.

“They have a crush just on my looks, it’s annoying”, he spits, “Why do you care so much anyways?”

“I…-” he looks at you with curiosity as you carefully think your words, “-I guess I would feel horrible if I were them and confessed”

“Don’t tell me you have a crush on someone Y/N”

“Of course not, all of you ,men, are idiots”, he place his hand on his chest with a wounded look, making your eyes roll, a smile tickling your lips, “Now, hurry with your homework, you’re stealing my lunch time”

He reaches for his bag, taking out his lunch box to hand you the extra Onigiri he had. You smile fondly even if it is not the first time he brings you food during your study sessions.

He was your best friend, yet his gestures never failed to dazzle you.... Maybe you do have a crush on him.

 ///

You enter the gym with a tired look, a yawn slips pass your lips before sitting on the bleachers, you plug your earbuds and take out an unfinished assignment from your bag. The second years wave at you, Atsumu sticking his tongue out, you wave back before locking eyes with him and returning the gesture, making the setter grin.

The next time you lift your eyes from your work, you open them wide before taking off your earbuds to listen to the scene in front of you.

A girl wearing the team’s jacket enter the gym alongside the captain, making it feel as if the time stop. The team look at them in surprise as she bows.

“I’m eager to be your new manager! I used to play but-” she points at her wrist with a shy smile,” I got pretty bad injured so I hope I can be helpful here”, you advert Atsumu’s gaze, making your heart flinch a little.

“I’m Miya Atsumu, setter, I haven’t see ya around before” the girl looks at him with an eager look, leaning closer, a happy smile on her face as Atsumu stands still, the smirk on his face fades as she erases the gap between them. ‘The hell is she doing?’

“Oh, I know you! The star setter, guess what they say about you is truth-”, you wait for the usual compliments girls told him all the time, your lips curve up a little remembering Atsumu’s usual reaction at them, “-your serves are truly monstrous, your technique is impeccable”

His eyes glimmer with curiosity and you notice the light blush on his cheeks as he gives her his best smile. In all the years you’ve known him, you’ve seen him flirting with girls, hooking up with one before getting another, but this…this was different.

You stand up before properly thinking what you are doing. You haven’t felt jealous before and you didn’t have the right for it, but an overwhelming despair sets the pace of your feet as they move towards them.

“I used to be a setter myself but-“

“Hey, Tsumu, see you after practice to finish our chemistry homework?” you peek your head between them, making the girl take a few steps back, a surprise look on her face. Atsumu looks at your innocent smile and blinks.

“Y/N, I told you not to call me that in practice-” he whispers to you, hiding it with a few coughs, “Uhmm, sure” the couch calls them and he waves at you before jogging off with the new manager to line up with the rest.

Your eyes linger on them a few more seconds, he laughs with her, making you furrow your eyebrows together, noticing just now, how beautiful she was.

///

“You still look like crap”

“Shut up, Samu!

You stand between the twins near the main door of the cafeteria, watching Atsumu run his hand through his hair multiple times as he stares at his reflection on one of the windows ‘All that… for her?’

A voice that comes from behind you, makes Atsumu look over your shoulder with a nervousness you haven’t seen before.

“Tsum Tsum!”

He gasps at the sight of her, the short dress she is wearing frames her figure perfectly, and you can’t help to look at your own clothes wondering if you couldn’t have dressed more casually.

You remain silent as she reaches for his hair and ruffles it friendly, the display in front of you feels surreal, suddenly your limbs are numb and your eyes can’t seem to drift away from Atsumu’s happy smile as he grabs her wrist to kiss her hand.

“You look stunning”

“What a gentleman – Oh, hey ‘Samu and-“

“Y/N” the words come sharper than you intended, the girl just let out an innocent giggle

“I’m so sorry! I don’t get to see you a lot in school, you’re in the advanced classes, right?”

“Y/N is a genius, they wouldn’t allow me to play if it wasn’t for her”, Atsumu says pointing at you with pride while his other hand rests on the small of her back guiding her to your table. A lump forms on your throat, making it impossible for you to reply, you  manage to pull an empty smile.

On the table you are silent as ever, nodding at all the conversations the second years try to include you in. Your mind is already far away, wondering all the possibilities that could happen if you were brave enough to confess right there, right now, but the sight in front of you snaps you to reality again.

Atsumu lips gets stained by some red sauce and before you can point it out, she licks her thumb before pressing it on his lips. His cheeks turn bright red and his jaw slightly slacks open.

“How is that you aren’t already dating? It’s been almost three months since you are all over each other” Suna casually says

Three months indeed, and she entered more and more in their small circle. But how could you stop it when she was just…so lovely?

 Atsumu stayed until much later in practice but still you chatted together. Late night texts, becoming in late night calls to check up on each other.

‘I want to ask her out. Fuck, I want her so badly, but what if she rejects me, Y/N!’

‘Tsumu, you’re Japan’s top high school setter. Believe me, she won’t reject you’

Now you want to hit your head against the nearest wall, remembering your stupid words.

“Would you say yes if I ask you out?” 

“I would say yes to more than that” the table falls dead silent at her words as if they waited for the next scene of a movie.

 Suddenly Atsumu press his lips against hers with ferocity, she pulls the collar of his shirt, deepening the already heated kiss. You almost choke on your water, earning a concern look from Kita, you find yourself standing up violently before rushing to the restroom.

You close the door behind you before looking at yourself in the mirror, ‘I could have never competed with her’. You bite your lip, and shut your eyes tightly, your hands grasping both sides of the sink, you let your head fall forwards, eyes fixed on the white of the porcelain as they water.

“Y/N, are you okay?” you stiffen at the soft female voice coming from the other side of the door, “Do you need help?”, you let out an humorless laugh. ‘A sweetheart with everyone, huh?’

“I-I don’t feel good, it’ll better if I head home. Please tell the others, I had an emergency or something” your throat feels extremely dry all of sudden and your voice comes out shaky.

“Oh! I can take you home-“

“I’ll rather go alone! I don’t know if I’m sick and I’d hate to…infect you. Thank you, tho”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes”

“Okay…text me when you get home!”

When you hear the footsteps fading away, you wait a few more minutes to walk out the restroom, just to find Atsumu talking cheerfully, his eyes filled with adoration for her. He didn’t even look at your direction as you left the cafeteria, and in that very moment you realized he would never look at you that way.

 ///

“Where is Y/N, I haven’t seen her in years?”

“I think she is tutoring some first years”

“Oh” Atsumu finds himself looking at your usual spot on the bleachers, he barely got to see or talk to you in the recent weeks. 

You’ve been missing his calls on purpose. Since that dinner, you had to put all your energy to smile at him when he waved at you in the corridors as he held her hand. It had been almost a month of hearing him talking about how gracious she was and weeks of looking how they made out on the couch in the end of the library or against one of the gym’s walls.

You thought that if you put distance with him, you’ll manage to get over that soreness that felt heavy on your chest each time she made him laugh. But no matter how many extra classes you took or how many first years you tutored, your mind always came back to Inarizaki’s setter.

The sky was dark by the time you finished tutoring the last first year, he bowed at you and you gave him a brief smile before locking the classroom. You handled the keys to your teacher and walked out of the building.

The cold wind hit your face, making you shiver, you search for your jacket in your bag, finding only a scarf. Atsumu gave it to you. You haven’t used it in a while now, but the cold was too much to bear with for your thin uniform. You place the material carefully around your neck, caressing the fabric begore sighing, watching your breath fading into the air and start walking.

“Oi” his voice makes you turn instantly, and you catch him jogging to you, “It’s fucking cold out here!- Uh, you still have it?” he points at your neck with a cheeky grin.

Atsumu looks extremely handsome like this, a little pink on his nose and cheeks and the few lights highlight the hazel of his eyes. It makes you gulp before replying.

“Of course, I do. It was my first two-digit birthday!”, he laughs remembering the chaos you both made by that age, you smile a little before looking at him with concern, “What are you still doing here? Something happened?”

“No! I-I just wanted to walk home with you, like we used to” he looks at the ground and sighs, “I know you’re busy, but I missed ya” the words make your heart warm even when you can’t stop shivering, “You are freezing” he takes his volleyball jacket and place it over your shoulders

“No, I’m fine, really. You should-”

“Stubborn as always. What am I supposed to do with your freeze corpse?”, you huff, putting the jacket on as he starts walking.

“What about your girlfriend?”

“She already left, don’t worry she knows you’re my best friend, she won’t act bitchy at you” you just nod and start walking alongside the setter, not caring about the sting that ypu just felt in your heart.

The walk is long and awkward, Atsumu finally getting hit by the way your friendship had changed. Your brief answers and forced smiles make him more and more annoyed, becoming more silent with each minute.

You didn’t have the energy to keep up with his drollery, each time you looked at him you just felt the urge to be held by him and tell him the painful truth: You didn’t have a crush on him. No.  You loved him.

“What is wrong with you?” he says, suddenly stopping.

“Excuse me- “

“If you don’t want to be friends with me anymore, just say it! Jesus!”, his exasperated tone makes your eyes narrow, “-But don’t have me fooling around, worrying about you for almost a month” your mouth twitches downwards as you realize your indifference had hit a spot on his pride. 

For a solid minute you don’t hear anything, you just stare at him with a flood of thoughts rushing through your head until you manage to pull one of them out into a dry whisper.

“We shouldn’t be friends anymore- “his clenched fists loosen, and he watches your lips carefully, “I can’t do it anymore – thought I could but…is too much”,

The crack of your voice makes you stop for second, giving you time to gain a little bit more of air before feeling again as if you were drowning.

“I can’t be friends with you anymore, because I want you!… The worst part is that she is so FUCKING perfect!” your arms move in the air letting out all the feelings you had bottled up.

“I thought I could brush away the feeling, but I realize – I  love you, Atsumu” his mouth opens slightly not able to produce a sound as your arms fall to your sides, a tear streaming down your cheek.

You take his jacket off, the cold air embracing your body, but you can’t care less. He motions to you, but you lift your hand, stopping him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Would it have changed anything?” his silence tells you all you needed, making your heart clench, “That – That’s what I though…It’s okay, really. I wouldn’t choose me either” your breath becomes irregular and you bite your lip, capturing a sob, “This is my fault, falling in love with you…If being friends makes you happy, I-I will do my best to be your friend, then”

Atsumu was usually selfish with the things he wanted and proud about the things he made but seeing you there, shivering with red eyes and swollen lips, made his heart ache.

And he couldn’t be less proud about the things he was about to say.

“You were right before. We shouldn’t be friends anymore. I do not want to deal with you being in love with me and my girlfriend”, you hiccup, fixing your sore eyes on his, “You made things so fucking complicated, it’s better to end this now”, he hiss, gritting his teeth, waiting for you to storm out.

 But when he feels your cold lips on his cheek, he bites his bottom lip harshly.

“Sorry, I never meant-”, ‘To fall for you’, it takes all his will power to not envelope you in his arms, so he only turns his face away, hearing your sobs. He loved you but not the way you did. “-to mess us up”

You walk away quickly, tears running down your cheeks as you press your hand firmly against your lips, drowning the uncontrollable sobs. Atsumu stands there watching you disappear into the coldness of the night, shutting his eyes tightly, understanding, he had lost his best friend.

❀ Please reblog if you like it! ❀

Thanks for reading ♡♡♡

↳ ∴ Master List ∴

[binniesthighs]

multifandom soulmate aus ✨

soulmate (n): a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner.

✨ a/n: hello hello!! today on, “Ro’s self indulgent fics” ehehe i’ve been thinking a lot about some of my favorite kpop besties and how i feel like sometimes in a group, there’s the members who just stick like glue and it’s kinda like they were destined to meet that way! anyway hehe this concept is so fkn cute to me so i wanted to make some poly r-ship headcannons with some of my favorites! 

➛ disclaimer: the pairings that i use are def not all inclusive of all “soulmate” pairings out there, just the ones i know of atm! also, i know some of these groups better than others, so some will be more specific, and others a little more general! 

✨ groups included: stray kids, ateez, the boyz, monsta x, seventeen, txt, bts 

✨ feedback is always appreciated! who’s your favorite?✨

➛maybe if we’re feelin’ spicy i can do a part 2 with the ones i haven’t done yet ;) 

Pairing: idol x female reader x idol (see fandoms above!) 

Genre: fluff n’ smut

Tags: established r/ship au, poly r-ship, sexual content (the usual stuff also including unprotected sex-please stay safe!) comfort ahhh, mentions of food alcohol  

*all photocreds go to ops :) 

both sfw and nsfw under the snip snip! 

♡ chanlix ♡

sfw

omg where the hell do i start with chanlix we love our cannon soulmates 

arguably the softest fkn pairing on this list; being soulmates with chanlix is like meeting your other halves (thirds?). there’s some serious destiny at work here!! 

the three of you understand each other on a spiritual level--almost to the point where you could likely read their minds if you wanted to try haha. there’s also a really, really strong type of emotional intimacy that you share with them that’s out of this world. 

this soulmate bond is so fkn strong, the three of you could go through any hardships and come out of it stronger than ever! 

the three of you have cute lil nicknames for eachother that you thought up yourselves! 

 your families are close as heck! it’s really pure how by the three of you so many people can get close ahhh 

i think that chanlix would be really into more outdoorsy dates? camping, swimming, hiking, sightseeing, stargazing, picnics etc! felix also loves taking you on food tours! 

bc chan is chan, he really takes on such a protective role over you and felix, he would quite literally do anything for you two: forgot your notebook or documents on the way to work/school? he’ll drop everything to bring them to you. sad? he’ll get you your favorite food, tons of blankets, his hoodie to wear and your favorite movie/tv show to watch with you! if anyone hurts your feelings too he will square tf up. 

felix is the world’s most adoring boyfriend in so, so many ways. not only is he such a cuddle bug, he shows you that he cares with tons of acts of service similar to chan! this comes in the form of his baking of course and other silly little gifts he sees that reminds you of him. he isn’t the best at words sometimes, but will soothe you by giving you a little massage or by playing with your hair! 

nsfw 

okay...😏 damn i’ve been wanting to write some poly chanlix so fkn bad ahhhh 

once again i really see chan taking the lead in more intimate situations. he really likes giving directions and seeing both you and felix carry them out! honestly he gets a bit of an ego boost seeing the both of you all whiny and fucked out ahhh 

here i come with my softsub!felix agenda oops hehe but this boy is frickin’ angelic for you and chan oml, he always asks for permission before he does things and eats praise up with a fkn spoon. praises alone really get him off: “does lixie like it when i play with his cute cock like this?” 

there’s something that gets the three of you ridiculously amped when you do all kinds of roleplay scenarios FRICK some favorites are pet play (you and lix being the kitties) teacher/student, roleplaying strangers, sex slaves, artist/muse, oh my god there was a halloween where you once did vampire roleplay you still think about it 🤤 

since the three of you are so comfortable with eachother, experimentation feels really safe! for example, the suggestion of shibari came up and now....let’s just say lix looks really pretty tied up ;) 

chan’s got a huuuuge (cock) and size kink!! he really likes topping both you and lix and seeing a bulge omg.... also when he can bulge your throats mmmhm! 

felix loves it especially when you ride his face, and he cold do it for hours! he looks so cute between your legs when he licks over and over your clit. he’ll ask you too if he’s doing good and you better say yes ;) 

favorite position would be all cuddled up and cozy with the two of them double penetrating you real nice and slow with tons of kisses and just touchin’ all over 

cockwarming cockwarming all day, every single time, without fail, it feels wrong if you finish without it! 

♡ woosan  ♡

sfw 

idk why but the first thing that comes to my mind is that in certain settings, ya’ll are loud as fuck AHA i guess what i mean to say as that as a trio, you are all super, super unapologetic and confident when around each other! this might have lead to you getting kicked out of a couple bowling alleys and karaoke places before... 

there’s a type of unspoken understanding that the three of you have that makes your bond so special. while you love eachother so dearly, it isn’t something that you really feel needs to be said out loud, it kind of just is! 

woosan are already really clingy on their own and when you come along?? you all can’t keep your hands off each other!! ya know how in movies there’s the whole “hand in the back pocket of your jeans???” woosan!! 

their energy together is so fkn chaotic but that's why you love them! they never fail to make you laugh and this is also the best way that they know how to cheer you up! 

Bc the three of you are a bit unbridled, it’s a bit hard to be serious at times when you go on dates/hang out with friends together so often you get some affectionate eye rolls haha 

wooyoung is someone that will try anything with you! hehe even if he knows that he mind not be that into it, he’ll still go with you! of course, he might say something snarky but he really does love just spending time with you! wooyoung also shares you with all his friends (changbin, yeonjun) so lowkey it feels like you’re one of the bros at times LOL 

san is a big fan of giving you gifts! oh also! words of affirmation too, san is someone who knows your insecurities well, so hypes you tf up all the time!! he especially loves buying things for you that he knows you’ll look pretty in just so he can compliment you ahhh 

at the end of the day however, there’s nothing more more that the three of you love than the tightest cuddles ever as you fall asleep! honestly, sometimes its a little too tight haha 

nsfw 

THESE BOYS FKN RAVISH YOU LIKE YOU’RE A FIVE COURSE MEAL 

and of course they expect the same from you as well! i mean....can you blame them??? these boys are sexy as hell and they frickin’ know it!! 

i have this super clear image of both of them stripping you down and rubbing massage oil all over your body and then giving you the turn to do it to them my lord...

sort of along this line, temperature play makes these boys feral. wax, ice, blowies with popsicles you name it 

both of them really just like being touched all over because they have the prettiest dancer’s bodies and just feeling hands on their muscles makes them loose it. 

wooyoung loves to mark the hell out the both of you in a really territorial way: all over your chests and necks even on your thighssss 

san, while he often does find himself in sub space, really easily can switch to dom you in the most beautiful way. everything with him is really intimate and raw: if this wasn’t already obvious haha he would like have a hand kink and loves seeing the way that his fingers look pumping in and out of your entrance and how your juices look as well. 

back too wooyoung, he’s the king of oral. whether it’s going down on you and sucking at your clit or deep throating with master level skill...foreplay is never boring with him! 

in my brain, i can see the both of them filling nearly position so this makes for an interesting dynamic to say the least AHA 

every once and a while, they’ll let you take complete control of the both of them while they just sit back and watch you with the most smug-ass grins that you’ll see in your life! 

AH another thought: woosan fkn love when you squirt on them, in any way this might look: when you’re nearly screaming in your overstimulation they want it all over them. 

favorite position would be 69 threesome style with all of your sloppy moans in-between <3 

♡  moonbae  ♡

sfw 

HEAR ME OUT the king of soulmates that know that they are soulmates but don’t take it seriously in the slightest istg this is my most favorite dynamic ahhhh 

there is not one dull day with these two boys, they’ll have you laughing in stiches until you can barely breathe like, the best kind of wheezy, silent laughter ya know what i’m talking about 

INSIDE JOKES literally so many inside jokes with the three of you 

Kevin is never scared to call your ass out, but that’s bc he knows you so well!! it’s all just jokes don’t ya worry ;) 

Along this line, your groupchat like has some random-ass name that’s also an inside joke

Jacob on the other hand is the biggest sweetheart when it comes to you, boy frickin’ melts. There is not a day that goes by when he hasn’t told you he loves ya morning and night. 

Also the best listener in the whole world, you can tell him anything and everything and he’s just sit and listen and give advice. 

Kevin loves you a ton a ton but just shows it differently! He remembers all the little things about you that you tell him to the point it’s scary how he does it so well 

Meme king Kevin would send you memes that remind him of you and Jacob

Lowkey i can see the both of them getting into the cutest petty arguments like which one of them you love more or think is more talented AHA again it’s all in good fun hehe 

it goes without saying but...it’s cuddle central up in here. 

THEY WOULD SERENADE TF OUT OF YOU oh my god it’s literally heavenly, Kevin would play piano and Jacob would play guitar FRICK 

You have oddly specific dates?? Like they would pick a movie to go see that the three of you would all hate just to meme the whole time. Jacob would still get invested accidentally tho. 

The way to both of these boy’s hearts is their stomachs so when you cook for them they would quite literally do anything for you 

nsfw 

ok ok so i’m a baby deobi so this is the gist of what i’m getting (i also did a little research LOL thank you @ deobi smutblr hehe) 

firstly i would like to say that i’m manifesting thigh riding with Jacob and i literally can’t think of anything else for some reason just p h e w and BOY does he love it too he thinks its so fkn cute to watch you! 

i get heavy, heavy switch vibes from Kevin with maybe some sub leanings??? either way, jacob def has soft dom vibes (oh god and occasional soft sub) to me but also has no problem with you taking control and doing what you like to him if that’s what you desire! 

kevin is impatient impatient and does not do well with your teasing. also...loud as hell, like, sometimes you have to tell him that he needs to calm tf down hehe (but of course you love it when he gets like that) 

separately, both of them are very different experiences i think: kevin is a fan of hard and fast, kitchen counter over the sofa type stuff sloppy toppy in risky places, and he loves to experiment too! 

jacob is also really different where he likes much, much more slow and intimate stuff like missionary, shower sex, real atmospheric stuff like candles and nice scents ahhh BIG fan of really fluffy pet names too like baby, princess, angel etc. super visual too omggg gets hard when you strip for him i think ;) 

together it’s a fkn whirlwind i’ll tell ya that. its like, honestly the most unique experience i can think of on this list because the two of them are so different. i will say that it can end up being really giggly and sweet tho! 

when it’s the three of you, kevin’s dom side comes out a little more so you’re left with these two lovely boys who want to give you all the attention! it’s lowkey a competition lol 

favorite position is when you’re sucking jacob off and kevin gets to do literally whatever the hell he wants with your pussy...i imagine that it might have to do a lot with edging if you ask me ;) 

♡ jookyun  ♡ 

sfw

oddly, i find myself soft af for jookyun and idk how to describe it haha (considering that they can often be hard as hellll) 

the three of you are also really nonchalant, but this is really in the way that you just feel as if you’ve known eachother for a really long time! 

as we know, jookyun were a bit of an enimies to lovers arc (AHA) so with the time that they’ve spent building their bond, it’s strong asf! 

i like to think that jooheon and changkyun would really get a ton of artistic inspiration from you for their music. since both of them write and often reflect bc of this, you’re totally their muse! (they’ll write some nasty as hell lyrics thanks to you too LOL) 

while our lovely thicc mx boys have unbridled confidence at times, really, they are babie. and they are frickin weak for your pampering. 

because of this, the two of them would become flustered as all hell when you do lil things for them!! this could be making them some lunch or just giving them the off compliment that they look a lil extra handsome that day. 

your safe place is with them!! ahhh i would also like to add the number of slick ass grabs when you’re in public is a bit off the chain at times ahah 

the duality of this r/ship is really something to note LOL when you go out and about when the two of them you certainly get some stares bc they look a lil intimidating at times but when you and your boyfriends cuddle up on the subway you give all passerby's whiplash haahah

Kyun is someone who is insanely romantic. almost to the point that it is cheesy haha he’d treat the both of you to expensive ass dinners, beach vacations and maybe even matching couple’s jewelry like rings or bracelets! 

jooheon on the other hand is a little more toned down haha but has another side to him that fkn swells with pride knowing how breathtaking you both are...frankly, his ego skyrockets knowing that he’s got you both for arm candy if this make sense teehee 

the three of you call eachother “babe” interchangeably, so it can get a bit confusing when you’re all in the same place and someone says “hey babe?” you need a new nickname ooP 

nsfw 

hello and here i am to push the sub!changkyun agenda. first and foremost i would like to explain how this man is such a pillow princess with the most lovely bratty edge *sighs* all that kyun wants is for you to fkn use him and do literally whatever the hell you want!! this man daydreams about you riding him right then and there wherever the hell he is. 

also, kyun is the king of toys, both using them on you and on himself! need i also say breath play as well in the same giving and receiving form? more than anything he loves it when jooheon wraps his hand around his neck hooooly ahhh he prefers it when you tease his tip with a vibrator until he’s angrily red and begging for you to give him a break just for you to bend down and give a kiss to his pearly head which makes him jolt 

jooheon is often more of a soft to hard dom if you ask me and takes care of both you and kyun really well. also... he will manhandle the hell out of you if you feel up for it (cough cough your arm kink for him ) oh shit and his thighs....don't’ even get me started 

while the three of you often opt for the hard and fast (even in some more risque places--such as in the recoding studio) there are really some more intimate times that you share too! 

on one of changkyun’s vacations, in the middle of the night, when no one was in sight and the hot tub was free for use...it started out as a bit of making out but then turned into something else when you decided to straddle jooheon and he let his hands creep under the straps of your swimsuit...needless to say you were bouncing on both of their dicks while you were warmed by the crackling bubbles 

at times, jookyun can get a little needy and impatient without you, so this has lead to a couple situations where you walk in on them letting out their frustrations ;) of course, immediately then they’d love for you to join! 

kyun has an oral fixation too, sooo he may or may not love cockwarming with his mouth or sucking your fingers lightly when you go to suck his dick~ 

♡  junhao  ♡

sfw

here me out with this one...but...there’s something really intimate about this relationship?? oh how to put this into words LOL junhao also have an insanely deep bond that really transcends if ya ask me haha 

while they both can be really goofy around eachother when comfortable the soulmate vibes are just...immaculate! this is all i can say? all three of you are just so connected in the way that you accept each other for all that you are and just kind of naturally gravitate towards each other even before you really knew that there were romantic feelings involved! 

first, i would like to say that out of all the pairings on this list, you three are classy as FUCK. seeing the three of you next to eachother is like seeing literally three models in the flesh. the way that you dress (sometimes even to match a little) is unbelievable bc you all just look so good? 

hand holdingggg wherever you go! holding hands across cafe tables, playing with each other’s hands absentmindedly hehe 

TRAVEL BUDDIES you would go anywhere with them and take tons of pics!! i mean the prettiest pics 

hao shows his love for you in the form of so many things, all of which he makes himself!! you inspire his physical art and drawings which he shares with you and he also loves to take clothes too and personalize them for you! 

jun on the other hand would take you to the studioooo and you could watch him danceee oh my gosh he’s literally so breathtaking and he would be dancing just for you with every curve of his body he’s so magical :’) then he’d ask you for feedback and you’d just be speachless...also loves to make you smile!! just being his goofy self he’s the best at it and thinks you’re so cute! 

there’s a ton of adoration in this relationship! tons of cute little displays of skinship that might look like a poke in the cheek or the fluffing of their hair ahh 

still, i feel like you would have kind of silly little nicknames for them that match their personalities and perhaps...you could have matching phone cases with these nicknames.... 

in this relationship there’s a ton of quiet moments that are really peaceful and indulgent such as watching sunsets, drinking wine together, just talking about life n stuff like that! 

nsfw 

hellz yeah we’re in for some more intimate-ass fuckin! but also....😏

this boys are kinky as shit but in like a really classy ass way lolll this is so hard to put into words. 

well, i’ll start with junhui catboy agenda so there’s that hehehe he would most def be into pet play: that could be like ears or pretty collars and of course calling you (or him) kitten. 

minghao is really versatile and doesn’t really like labels of dom and sub, he just does what he wants and what feels good to him! bc we’re talking about how intimate everything is, the kind of sex that you share with them is often never rushed but really purposeful and even planned sometimes! 

i also see there being TONS of sensory items that would come into play with junhao such as flowers, fragrances, aphrodisiacs, all kinds of fabrics for sensory deprovision such as velvet, silk, hemp rope, and so much more! 

BOTH OF THEM WOULD SOUND ANGELLIC i see hao as letting out really pretty soft moans that kind of trail on his tongue and jun sort of choking out gasps with a bit of a rasp to them when they cum or they feel turned on

oh god MIRROR SEX that's what i have to say about this 

it doesn’t happen often, but sometimes when any one of you would be feeling needy or pent up they can certainly do hard and fast with you between the two of them. especially when this happens, oh my god hao loves it when you moan really breathily into his mouth when you’re pressed against him ooooh shit 

and jun loves it when you bite into his shoulder too when he fucks you it just makes him feral 

actually, i could really see the three of you recording yourselves, or even taking pictures when you have more intimate moments to look at later, just for your own enjoyment or to get off when you’re without the others 

favorite position: hmmm mirror sex with you on top of minghao literally just kissing him and marking his body as jun eats you out until you’re dripping down to minghao’s cock which he jerks off too~ 

♡  yeonbin  ♡

sfw 

DON’T TOUCH ME IM SOFT  

admittedly i don’t know too much about this pairing but i do know a lil so i wanted to add them!! i also did a lil research hehe 

FIRST i would like to say that the three of you would without a doubt have the cutest puppy together, if not one, then two!! they would be little dogs with perfect haircuts and likely have their own instagram account which the three of you would run! they’d be instragram famous of course 

LITERALLY EVERY DAY ITS A FIGHT OVER WHOS CUTEST i kid you not this is an ongoing battle you’re all just...so weak for the other ahaha 

being in a relationship with them is like being in a relationship with your bestfriends! 

dates with the two of them can really range all over the place bc you just like having fun together! movie dates, breakfast dates, ZOO OR AQUARIUM DATES, taking little trips to places you haven’t been before or stay at home dates like having a little indoor picnic! 

soobin is really low energy, and would often opt to hang out with you at home or at a cafe while the two of you do your thing together! he lovessss when you bake or cook for him, literally whatever it is he’ll eat it! 

his smile is instant serotonin and the reason why you fell in love with him! the two of them together all smiley is your lockscreen! 

yeonjunie prefers going out with you clothes shopping and would DEF enable you to dye your hair a color that you’ve always been dying to do! he also loves showing you new music and blushes like heck when you tell him that you like the songs that he picks! 

in their own playful ways too, they’d always call you out on your bs LOLL but they just wanna motivate you! they’re your biggest cheerleaders! 

Deep down though, both of them are quite cheesy and would love to shower you with alll the stereotypical romance that you can take even if it makes all three of you cringe ahahah 

nsfw

NEEEEDY and literally so mf horny on the dl like it’s comical to how soft and shy they can be in real life situations 

oh my god this is a godly thought but i see both of them being both switchy as heck but not really bc they like how it feels to be in those different postions but literally....bc no matter what it is they are getting off lolll 

i see both of them having sub leanings but can get real bratty if they’re feeling it. 

yeonjun does have a dom side to him that just comes with his general confidence that he gets around you! when either of you beg from him he’s ready to let himself loose. 

im so sorry but they literally handed pet play to me on a silver platter with cat & dog and there is no going back for me. SO you’re in for puppy, kitty and bunny play (shhhh yeonjun’s got his fox ears too) 

WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT HOW ALL OF YOU WOULD LIKE THIGH HIGHS

both of them love being edged to high hell by you...no matter if it hurts...they kinda like it? 

at the same time, both of your boyfriends also love giving you all the attention at times too! i’m talking about one of them playing with your breasts while the other trails kisses down your body all the way down to your pussy aching for attention too

FUCK this might be just me but soobin eating you out>>>> a GODLY sight. 

i have this other fantasy of yeonjun with either lip piercings or nipple piercings or even a dick piercing someone plz tell me to calm down 

oh please...bubble bath with the two of them holy shit baby pink bubbles all around you while you take turns givin’ each other cute kisses ahhhh 

one more thing to the pile here would be hella mutual masturbation soo much of it. the three of you get off just simply watching eachother too and dirty talking how much you love the way the others look with hands rubbing themselves away with cute whiny moans~ 

♡ taekook ♡

sfw 

omg! this is my first time remotely talking about bts on my blog hehe this is so exciting!! i don’t really read too much bts ff so this is going off of my own perception! 

i just wanna say....there’s so much to unpack here LOL but like many of the soulmates on this list, these boys are ~whipped~ for you and eachother!! its so stinkin’ cute 

another thing about these expensive boyfriends is that they loooove to sing for you too! they’d sing you to sleep, when you’re sick, sad, or just had a hard day allllways hehe 

the three of you have sickeningly adorable nicknames for eachother, the kind that honestly make heads turn LOL 

jk would without a doubt get tattoos with you!! and wine drunk lollll he’s also a huge enabler so if there’s anything that you’re considering buying or doing he’d hype you up so bad you barely have to think twice heheh 

kinda like junhao they’d also make amazing travel buddies but less for the aesthetic, but for the luxury. you’d stay at amazing hotels and eat at Michelin star restaurants wearing luxury brands that they bought for you

i feel like this goes without saying, buuuut in this r/ship, its alll about the adoring glances from afar or even just right next to you bc they love you so much!! 

i also get a very protective vibe from them as well, you’re very special to them, and they never wanna see you in harms way or disrespected by anyone! this could even look like having their arm around you on the bus or on the small of your back in a crowd 

together, they’re the biggest jokesters and flirty as HELL they think that it’s so funny when they flirt out in public AGRESSIVELY just to make you a lil embarrassed hehe  

forehead kissessss and kisses on the back of your hand! 

nsfw 

luxurious in this area tooooo 

they would rent out the penthouse or presidential suite to make an evening for you and pull out all the stops: expensive champagne, lingerie selected just for you, a breathtaking view of the city ahhhh 

ya all know how much i love my soft and intimateeee body touching and there would be plenty of this! they take their time undressing you and eachother and would plant kisses into the nape of your neck and shoulders as you do so! 

i would like to contribute to this conversation sub!jk bc this is something that ahhhhh i really like to think about as well as soft dom tae bcccc why not heheh 

these boys are utterly gorgeous under soft lighting and prowling all over your body too tho ahhh 

BUT! imagine teasing the hell out of jk, barely letting him feel your mouth besides fleeting kisses while tae drives his hips into you from behindddd 

in fact, these boys actually don’t mind a little voyeurism with the wide windows in your suite, opting to leave them open so there's a bit of thrill in the way that they fuck you too~ 

tae has a bit of...dare i sayyyy a power kink, so when you call him names such as sir, daddy, master etc oh boy 

jk himself is bit into sensory dep specifically with blindfolds especially when its your hands travelling all around his body making him shiver. 

both of them just looove cuming all over you as well: face, ass, thighs, belly, literally anywhere, they just think that you look amazing like that! 

there are a couple times here and there when the three of you also do a bit of cam work together for other people to watch--although it isn’t often, you rake it in when you do so. the three of you are a perfect fantasy! 

sex also can happen in odd places with you three too since you can just start feeling it and don’t really care ;) strangest place....hmm i’d say when you joined the mile high club with them~ 

~🌹~

Bunch of (Ro)ses! 

@minaamhh @dazzlehoseok @synnocence @jjewibeans @hyunsluvv @unexceptional-h @bobawithchaitea @lechanters @sailorhyunjinz @silencefavarchive @lunarskzzz  @yourdaddychan @bubblelixie @spnobsessedmemes @lmhmins @eunaeiekim

[tsumtsumland]

“bittersweet”| m.osamu x reader

genre: smut, enemies to lovers

warnings: public sexy time, blowjob, you know...smut... (as you can tell, I’m really bad at this lol)

author’s note: I’m so sorry that this installment is bit late, I’ve had quite a trying week and my motivation has been super low, anyway, I hope you guys enjoy!

As a confectioner, high quality cocoa is an absolute must, especially around this time of year, one day until Valentine’s. The problem with that is: almost everyone is looking for high quality cocoa around this time of year. Which is how you find yourself in another part of Hyogo Prefecture, in a little-known gourmet store, which, unfortunately for you, is also full to the brim with people.

You manage to push your way through the crowd just enough to find a spot in the baking goods aisle. Your eyes frantically read through all the labels of items trying to come upon what you need. At last, when you do zero in on your precious cocoa, there’s only one left and you dash towards it.

Eyes on the prize. That’s the only thought in your head right now.

Just as you’re about to grab the tin of cocoa, another hand reaches for it. You lunge forward and grasp on at the same time. Both you and the other person’s grips are tight on the lone tin, and you refuse to budge.

“It’s mine!” you growl under your breath, not looking away from your coveted ingredient.

“I grabbed it first,” comes the low rumble of a man’s voice. Wait…a man???

That has your head snapping up, and what you don’t expect to meet is the apathetic gaze of a tall, (and you begrudgingly admit) handsome, man. He blinks at you with the same expression, as you flounder for a comeback.

“Yeah, well, well I NEED it!” you groan on the inside at your pathetic attempt at a rebuttal.

“I don’t care,” he responds, in the same tone, which only serves to rile you up more.

Both of your grips loosen on the tin, and it’s then you see it, it’s almost imperceptible, but there’s a challenging fire in his grey eyes. Not one for giving in, you match it with a glare of your own, refusing to back down even though his strangely dominant look has you wanting to retreat.

While both of you are caught up in your stare down, you completely miss the other hand that snakes behind you both and snatches the cocoa off the shelf.

“Listen, I don’t have time for this, I have chocolates to make!” you grit out at him, glancing at your watch.

“With what?” is his response as he raises a questioning eyebrow.

“Wha-?” you follow his gaze as he nods toward the empty shelf behind you.

All the colour drains from your face, and an almost inaudible squeak escapes your mouth at the barren shelf.

He snorts quietly, “Looks like someone got the one up on us both,” he shrugs.

The nonchalant way he moves makes your blood pressure skyrocket, and you quite literally want to dive at him and clobber his stupidly handsome face.

“This is all your fault,” you mumble under your breath, begrudgingly, letting your shoulders drop in defeat.

“What was that?” he stops, and turns to look at you with a raised eyebrow.

“Nothing,” you hiss and push past him, making sure your shoulder nails him in the chest as you do.

You miss the amused smile on his face as you go.

It had been a while since Osamu met someone that piqued his interest. You had done what Suna and Atsumu like to call “the impossible.”

_____________________________________

The atmosphere in the club is hazy, and the heavy bass pounding through the speakers makes everything vibrate. You don’t want to be at this club right now, you’d rather be anywhere than here on Valentine’s in fact. Being the only single one out of all your friends, you’d somehow managed to get dragged here. Now you were stuck sitting by yourself at the bar glancing around hoping for an early escape.

The bartender places your glass of vodka cranberry on the counter, and you almost sigh in relief. At least the alcohol was making this disaster of a night, bearable. When you reach out for it, another hand does as well, gripping the glass at the same time you do.

“That’s mine,” you both say in unison.

The feeling of deja vu almost makes you choke on air. That all too familiar voice is closer to your ear this time, making the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. It washes over your skin like velvet and makes you shiver.

Osamu doesn’t miss the way your grip on the glass tightens when he moves a little closer.

“We meet again,” he smirks, enjoying the way you bite your lip at his voice.

“I wish I could say it was a pleasure,” you snap, eyes narrowing at him, still bitter over your cocoa. You had to make do with regular, cheap, cocoa, for your Valentine’s truffles, and you hated it.

“It could be,” he mumbles into your ear, sending sparks shooting up your spine, “I’m Osamu, nice to meet you…again.”

You scoff and roll your eyes, “Y/n…and I wish I could say the same,” you brush your hair over your shoulder and try to turn away from him.

“Don’t tell me you’re here alone, dressed like that, on Valentine’s Day,” he adds, giving you a once over in your strappy black mini dress. He was hoping you were. It was sheer dumb luck that he ended up running into you at this club his brother dragged him to, on Valentine’s Day nonetheless.

Your mouth feels dry all of a sudden when you meet his gaze, his eyes are smouldering, and they have you clenching your thighs together.

You think maybe that’s how you ended up here...crammed into a tiny, rather fancy, bathroom stall, on your knees with his cock stuffed down your throat.

Osamu’s got one of his hands gripping on to the door of the stall, and the other is tangled in your hair guiding your head back and forth

You moan in the back of your throat and the vibration on his cock makes him grip your hair even tighter. He’s biting his lip to hold back his own noises when you take him even deeper. You pull back until only the tip is in your mouth, and swirl your tongue around it, then take him back halfway in, flattening your tongue against the sensitive underside of his meaty cock. Something akin to a growl is heard from the sinfully handsome man above you, making you look up at him from under your lashes.

The top three buttons of his fitted, black dress shirt are undone, and there’s a light sheen of sweat on his exposed chest. The red lighting from the club extends to even the restrooms, and it makes him look even more delicious…like something out of a movie (what kind of movie is up to you). He’s breathing heavily and looking down at you with that dark, but fiery gaze again. You rub your thighs together, trying to give yourself some friction.

Osamu smirks devilishly when he notices your movements, “You want to cum too, baby girl?”

You can only whine with his cock stuffed in your mouth. He yanks your head back by your hair and meets your eyes.

“Answer me when I talk to you,” the tenor of his voice is low but commanding.

“Y-yes,” you gasp out, taking the time to wipe a stray tear from the side of your face.

Osamu’s thumb grazes over the tear track almost gently, before he pushes your head back towards his cock.

“I’ll give you what you want, don’t worry,” he promises.

That fuels your need to get him off even more, you want to see this calm and collected man fall apart in your mouth.

It doesn’t take long either, a few more thrusts into your mouth that have you gagging on his length, and spurts of hot cum are flowing onto your tongue, you swallow eagerly. He pulls back when you claw at his thighs when it becomes too much.  He lets the rest paint your face and exposed cleavage.

When his orgasm fades, he fixes his clothes and helps you off the floor, making sure you’re steady before letting go. He grabs some of the toilet paper, cleaning up your face and chest as much as he could.

“Well, that was…” you begin awkwardly, taking the tissue from him and tossing it in the bin.

“Fucking amazing,” he finishes unabashedly, making a blush crawl up your neck and cheeks.

He tiptoes and looks over the stall to make sure the coast is clear. It isn’t, but it’s less people than there usually is. He drags you out with him despite your squeaks of protest.

You apologize to the few women scattered around the sink and quickly wash your hands and mouth and try to look presentable again. It didn’t exactly work, but hey, at least there weren’t any tell-tale signs of cum on your black dress.

He chuckles when you drag him out of the restroom quickly, trying to lose yourself in the throngs of people. You don’t get far before he pulls you back against him, pressing your ass flush against his prominent erection.

“I owe you an orgasm,” he mumbles against your ear, as if it’s the most normal thing to be saying.

One of his hands snakes over the front of your thighs and up under your dress, ghosting over your embarrassingly soaked panties.

“For me?” he hums lowly, his pointer and middle finger tracing the slit between your legs.

You can’t help the moan that falls from your lips, grateful that the room is so loud and crowded that no one notices, your head nodding involuntarily. You gasp and swat his hand away when you feel his finger dip in between your folds.

“Not here!” you hiss, regaining control of your brain momentarily.

Just as he’s about to respond, someone calls his name and he looks up, removing his hand swiftly and pulling you to his side.

Your eyes widen to the size of saucers when you see an identical copy of the man standing next to you, in front of you, the only difference is his hair colour.

“What do you want Tsumu?” Osamu drawls.

“Ya! Where’d you go?!” Atsumu asks. “Oh hello,” he flashes you a grin and slides closer to you, only stopping when his brother puts a firm hand on his shoulder and shoves him back.

“Back off!” Osamu glowers at him.

Atsumu smirks knowingly at the both of you, though you’re nothing but confused by this entire encounter.

“Go on then,” he tells you both and turns to lose himself in the crowd of squealing girls behind him.

Osamu rolls his eyes and shakes his head. He grabs your hand and follows a different pathway to the exit.

“Where are we going?” you ask, already knowing the answer.

“Home, I’m hungry,” is his reply, and it makes you clench around nothing in anticipation.

Taglist: @kiyoo-omi @vs-redemption @mitzuya

[theinariakuma]

Idk if you're still doing the prompts uhhh idk if this one is on the list but what about overstimulation with Mammon? 😳🥵

Rated: NSFW

Genre: Mammon x Fem!Reader

Prompt: Overstimulation

A/N: I am so sorry this took so long. This one escaped me for writing for a while, and I was finally able to finish. I really wanted to do right for Mammon. ♥

I hope you enjoy it. 

Prompts are still open, see here.

Three days. 

It had been three fucking days since Mammon got some alone time with her. Every time he was about to take her away to spend some time with her, someone snatched her away. 

He may not have been the representation of Envy, but he sure as hell was annoyed and jealous. 

She was his first. 

He didn’t wanna keep her from doing things. She was her own person with her own life and he loved that independence of hers. But sometimes he liked knowing that she was his too. So watching as Lucifer guided her away only made him narrow his eyes. 

His brothers had never been this annoying before. 

He swore the next person that tried to take the one-on-one time away from him was getting dragged off. 

The impulse purchases that were coming were mostly because he was using it as a distraction rather than attempting to beat his brothers, stealing the woman they were keeping busy, or making schemes for more money to go into his wallet.

Before he knew it, he was out a good load of Grimm and his annoyance hadn’t calmed, just turning to annoyance at both his brothers and himself with his buyer’s remorse. 

“Oi! Ya done?” He saw her finally, finally alone. 

“Mhm!” The bright smile she gave him caused him to soften a bit. She was an amazing person… she didn’t treat anyone different, human, demon, angel. It was what made him like her so much. He couldn’t get too frustrated that it drew in others. 

“Come on.” His hand grabbed hers, red staining his cheeks. “You’re all mine tonight.” His voice was rougher than he meant it to be, almost nervous that if he went too far, she’d be snatched away again. 

Mammon didn’t take her to his room. Her room was always warmer, more inviting. His room was a paradise to him before he met her. All his belongings--his collection of shiny toys he bought. Now that he had more he didn’t really care about them as much as he used to. He found a new thing to treasure. 

All of the earlier jealousy and annoyance were melting away with the warmth of her hand in his. 

Sadly, it came back with a vengeance when they got up to her room when he saw Belphegor asleep in her bed. 

Angry did not seem to cover what he was feeling. One fucking night. He wanted one fuckin’ night with his human.

“Maybe we should--”

“Stay.” The demand was short, sharp. 

His focus was too locked on his younger brother as he hauled him up and over his shoulder, that he missed the way the woman bit into her lower lip, watching as he showed both his frustration and strength in the same moment. 

“Fuckin’ keep the bastard, Beel!” Mammon’s sharp growl caused the Avatar of Gluttony to look to his twin, who was currently glaring at Mammon while rubbing his head. He hadn’t woken up when Mammon carried him like a flour sack--no, Mammon did that too often when he was a kid for Belphie to really notice it anymore, rather he woke when his face met the hard flooring of his and Beel’s shared room. 

When he returned, he saw she was sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting on him. A small smile on her lips when she saw him return

“Mammon, are you--”

Before she could finish asking him if he was okay, the man cupped her face and kissed her roughly. Aggressively pressing into her, using his tongue to push past her lips. He felt the way that she melted and silently obeyed his demands. 

As soon as it seemed like he’d stop like he was about to pull away, he’d press closer, drawing her back into the kiss as his fingers slid away from her face but into her hair. Every so often he'd pull away from the kiss to lightly nip at her lower lip before moving back to a kiss.

He was going to remind her of who she belonged to. 

When he finally pulled his mouth from hers, her face was flushed and her eyes were hooded. Her lower lip reddened from his attention. 

"You're mine." His voice was low. "I don't care what ya do, where ya go. You're a big girl and I won't control ya. But when they take my time with ya." A low growl escaped his lips as he moved to push his knee between her thighs, his body climbing over hers, pinning her to the bed. There were no more words he needed to say, she knew what he meant. And knew he planned to show her. 

It felt like hours... had it been hours? She felt too good and her mind was too foggy to focus on anything but the man touching her. 

Deep, trembling breaths left her, her body was trembling as her hands twisted in the sheets. “Mammon…” Her voice was breathless, her cunt was trembling and dripping. Since pinning her down, Mammon had been working her over, making her see stars time and time again. 

“Look at you… So beautiful and perfect. I haven’t even had to put my cock in you and you’re already a mess.” Three climaxes. Two from his fingers, one from his tongue. He was enjoying her every climax, her sounds, every bit of her. 

“Please Mammon… Please... I need you.”

“Need me to what?” Mammon was behind her as his hands drew her hips higher, his cock soon pressing to her trembling cunt, the length of his shaft brushing over her swollen clit, earning low whines from her. 

“F-fuck me… I need your cock inside me…. I need you to fuck me, Mammon.”

Hearing that made the demon nearly purr with excitement at his lover, watching as her hips wiggled a bit under his teasing. 

“Such a good girl.” His hips drew back before he was filling her. Listening to the low cry that left her. She was already so sensitive from cumming so much, her cunt clenching and squeezing his cock. “Relax…” He crooned a bit, taking his time, trying to coax her to relax before she came again just from him filling her. 

Once he was fully pressed into her, she was clawing at the bed, the dark sheets tugged between her fingers. The woman couldn’t help her moans as his hips began thrusting in and out, short bursts through the tight clenching around his cock. 

It was obvious by how her breath caught and her little gasps when he moved that she was too sensitive, however, it didn't do anything besides encourage him. 

His beloved little human learned time and time again that his greed was not only with objects but things like time, attention, and making sure he out did anyone in the number of climaxes he gave her. 

A hand slid along her back as it arched, hips thrusting to meet her. His cock hilted deep inside her with every thrust. The languid moans that spilled past her lips were something he could get lost in. He knew how tightly wound she was. Too sensitive from so many climaxes so quickly, overstimulated from both attention and pleasure. 

"I-its too much…" Her voice was a gasp, her body writhing under him. 

Mammon could feel how tight her cunt gripped him. 

"Shh baby. I know you're my strong girl. Just a lil' more…" His voice was smooth and soft, the charming sort of voice that got him deals with Witches and into Casinos. 

Swallowing hard as she weakly nodded, "I'm trying… I'm trying..." Her voice hiccupped with pleasure and Mammon smiled as his thrusts began moving harder, faster. Her moans mingling with the desperate words.

When she came, she couldn't stop her body as it convulsed. Her thighs and hips shaking as he leaned over her gently, holding her as her climax wrecked her. He was enjoying the way he broke his sweet human with so much pleasure. His own climax causing warmth to pool in her belly. 

"That's it, baby." He gently rolled them to their sides on her bed, her body still cradled by his when he began drawing out of her. Fingers brushes sweat dampened hair out of her face to kiss her forehead. "You were perfect. Always are."

The soft praises made her lips turn into a tired smile as her mind was left fuzzy from all the pleasure. "Love 'ou, Mammon…" The way her words were slurred with a mix of exhaustion and satisfaction brought him so much pride. 

"I love you too. Get some rest. I'll clean us up."