#y'all theatre kids are something else and I mean that in the best way

[spineless-lobster]

Just finished watching newsies, by god those boys were flying

[organic-guacamole]

showtime

episode 211 let's go

ok first of all, this is the second to last episode guys... I don't even wanna think about how much pain I'll be in after next week's episode

mr mazzara doing the recap-

this is so weird to me and I don't know why

WHY DIDN'T YALL JUST ASK BENJAMIN FOR HELP, THATS LITERALLY HIS THING

is Nini giving out the cards a callback to season 1 when Natalie Bagley said that Nini gave her a card or something on opening night of another musical?

STEPHY AS THE ENCHANTRESS OMG YES

Ricky in the crown gives me Harry styles in that photoshoot vibes

he's so pretty.

ok but why did we never see Ricky and Ashlyn interact before? it's been like 5 seconds and I already love how they bounce off each other and it's just so natural

OH THEY REALLY DON'T HAVE ANY UNDERSTUDIES-

well that explains a lot...

so Ricky fell on top of Ashlyn and all that broke for both of them was their wrist-

insert Jake Peralta *coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool no doubt no doubt no doubt*

of course howie was amazing as the beast, were we expecting anything less??

Ricky is so beautiful and I will not shut up about it....

let me enjoy this before the makeup crew slaps mud on his face.

Nini and Ricky talking to eachother? in a civil manner? wasn't she avoiding him just in the last episode? hm ok

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH THEY CANT EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS JUST LIKE ME HAHAHAHAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS, WHATS NEXT? THEY CUT EVERYONE OFF CUZ THEY CANT HANDLE EMOTIONS? ...ha

yes Kaden and Rico, my favourite east high boys 🥰

I mean....where's EJ?

THERE HE IS

EJ AND GINA IN THE BACKGROUND... doing something idek

KOURTNEY'S MOM IS BACK YAY

Howie is a shining star, ofc ofc

the smallest fOrk

can't wait to see the fork burst into song about how she deserves more than to be used to eat salad😌

the duster and the bluster.... ok😃

hi Gina!

hi- oh wow I didn't know Robbie Rotten was in this show!!!!!

the portwell look.

that my friends, is a married couple's look✋

GOSH EJ WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU

aww Gina's so excited for this

D word?

Die?

Delicious?

Dom Toretto?

"good, clean fun all alone with someone I dig...a lot"

sir that does not sound very clean to me

SEBLOS

Seb looks so cute standing there next to pope Carlos

DID THEYEY REALLY LIGHT ANTOINE ON FIRE-

I NEED TO SEE THAT

Seb's reading Carlos better than big red read the script in episode 102, this is great development after the "fight"

Kourtney really just made the best outfit for herself and let the rest of them suffer

the way Gina immediately goes to hold on to EJ after the announcement

"tonight we're going to put the U in UTAH"

...

"hey where are you from?"

"TAH"

SEB'S SINGULAR CLAP KILLED ME-

he's officially salt lake city's resident thanos

just wity clapping because for some reason I have a feeling he doesn't know how to snap his fingers...don't ask why

Ms Jenn do you mind encouraging your leads before the show? idk just an idea

pepto bismol product placement smhsmh

those flowers are bigger that big red himself-

*bops along to the opening theme*

that whistle at the end slaps everytime

WHY IS THE AUDIENCE SO MASSIVE

I guess they're all here to see Ms Jenn go on as a fork after Nini decides to *go her own way*

wow i am so funny

so they couldn't do many group scenes cuz of covid, but this 300 person crowd is cool? nice

OO THE VIOLIN GIRL FROM EPISODE 6 IS IN THE ORCHESTRA

HOWIEEEEEE

"Mr Caswell", he said, in the loudest voice possible while backstage at a show that's about to start.

Mazzara what are you trying to pull-

I usually like Benjamin but I don't like his tone

"iS yOuR wHoLe FaMiLy HeRe?" LIKE YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THATS A SOFT SPOT FOR EJ

"we've had some good conversations these past few weeks"

right so what's going to happen after you graduate?

what does he think of you not going to Duke?

what did he say about you giving the sweatshirt that's been in the family for 3 generations to a girl you're not even dating?

good old Mr. M

therapist Mr. Mazzara, they all need it.

start with Ricky though.

"Michael Bowen"

dude why did you shave, now you look less like "hot lumberjack" and more "creep at the gas station"

OH-

does she not like Mike anymore?

why does it sound like jennzzara started dating and now they just sit back and talk smack about everyone in their freetime

break the fourth wall-

uhhhh im scared

why am I scared

he's scary

hehe flowers for Ricky, obviously for Ricky, ObViOuSLY

oh boy poor Michael

this man is in love, rip

why does Ms Jenn always look at people with her eyes open so wide

LILYYYY

I'm only excited because I really like the idea of lily and Ricky being friends, nothing more.

ha this guy's got jokes

a MOAT AROUND THE SCHOOL

wheeze

also he's very pretty.

"the wolves and very talented humans"

how dare he forget to mention the very talented wolves and normal humans, smh erasure

"being nice, what a concept" ted talk by Lily who still doesn't have a last name

did she just say lol out loud

same with the hug emoji last episode-

go touch some grass babes

the way he didn't say no, but said he didn't know how the east high kids would react-

not saying he does want to date her but that's an interesting thing to think about, also another thing to write an essay analysis on just to leave it in my drafts for a few months

awww lily genuinely trying to help him

sorry guys, I've been taken by the Lily charm (didn't know it existed until now but oh well)

REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I'LL NEVER SHIP PORTWELL?

just look at me now

the Lily wink I can't she's so cute-

HELP ME I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY LIL-

David Attenborough?

oh nvm it's Benjamin narrating the show in a really weird British accent for some reason.

STEPHY GOT MORE LINES YAY GOOD FOR HER

also is this to show that Nini doesn't care about being the star of the show anymore? the way she's supporting everyone else even though she's a fork?

I would pay for a special of the full musical ngl

OOO THE TRANSFORMATION WAS SMOOTH

shockingly

yo where did the makeup come from

man I wish I was a theatre kid

THIS IS STEPHY'S EPISODE NOW IDC✋

my girl is starring

"needs an X-factor"

Simon Cowbell creeps in

"it's a yes from me"

and them boom, he takes Nini and mistreats her horribly and then she comes back to theatre after deciding music isn't for her👍

"I thought she just hog-tied him?"

don't ask sebby, it's better if you don't know.

imagine they spotlight the wrong person and this dude is just some random person that likes writing down stuff during shows.

Ms Jenn just let them do what they rehearsed (at some point we never saw) or else this is gonna end horribly wrong

"help"

same Carlos, same

I love how seb is just his translator rn

I thought he said "great displeasure" instead of "greatest pleasure"....help?

big red coming out from throwing up to see his girlfriend star is the cutest thing in this show.

Ash and Gina dancing is so fun

I'm imagining them practicing at night at their home, watching the movie for the 100th time and making sure their one dance together is perfect

KOURTNEY YES

HOWIE IS IN LOVE AHHHH

I LOVE HOWIE SO MUCH

SEBBY

THIS SCENE HAS SO MUCH GOING ON I CAN'T KEEP UP

THIS IS SO GOOD

HOW???

no because I'm actually crying

I'm dead serious.

we need this musical released as a special

big red is so proud and I love to see it

Natalie: "if you do not by at least 20 dollars in concessions, you do not support art"

rando in the audience: "but I pay for ad free Spotify"

Mr Mazzara clapping in the distance

Gigi, the guy you like is talking to you, complimenting you and hyping you up

YOU LUCKY LITTLE FEATHER DUSTER

aw EJ teasing her about the chocolates in a way that doesn't make her feel bad? take notes Richard

JORDAN FISHER

there is no rest of the show idc Jordan is it for me

THE WIG CAP ON RICKY OMG

they look like they're high and having "deep" conversations on the floor

THE MEAN GIRL WITH THE EYES-

@sunshine-julie-molina YOU HEAR THAT

Natalie really just be coming for them all

Howie what is happening rn

I'm scared

"did you enjoy it"

"very much"

dude wants a kiss so bad

ASHLYN OMG

NO DON'T DO IT BECAUSE OF LILY, PUT YOUR OWN TWIST ON IT

I want a Jordan autograph please

just keep swim- oh pushing...

Gina is literally a giant next to him and I live for it

am I about to cry for the 3rd time in this episode?

yes.

Ricky's leg kicks under the table makes me so happy aw

the portwell glances will kill me.

ah yes, mashed potato snow

Mr. M.... I'm not a theatre kid but even I know you can't have your phone on backstage.

Howie please just do it

CHIP'S BIG LINE I CANT

I LITERALLY HAD TO PAUSE IT AMD SCREAM INTO MY MASK FOR A SOLID 2 MINUTES (I'm not at home rn) HES SO CUTE

oh ok bye Jordan

oo tea

NOT HIM BEING STARSTRUCK BECAUSE HE'S MEETING HIS FUTURE BROTHER IN LAW-

"we're all just glad Gigi has a big brother figure in her life"

excuse me for a few thousand hours while I laugh hysterically

THE CAMERA ZOOM ON EJS FACE AND EVERYTHING-

STOP EJ LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA CRY BUT I CAN'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY WITH THE STAGE MAKE-UP

someone else said this already but I think it's hilarious that they had to bring in 2 guest characters to create some portwell angst

omg this really is Cici's episode, found family is their thing

elevator music lol

I'm gonna bet that big red took the harness for his surprise for Ashlyn without realising what it was

did Ms. Jenn just....tell her most mentally unstable student....to commit suicide....on a disney show...was that....I'm very....well....what the actual-

oh and there she goes running off instead of trying to make it right

oh wow Nini's the hero, she's gonna save the show 🤩

😐

the judge is doing a sudoku

honestly if I went to the hsm show as well, I'd come prepared for this one too

Lily why are you looking like that-

I WAS JUST STARTING TO LIKE YOU DON'T MESS THIS UP

wow ok, there goes that.

omg

what if Howie was acting weird because he knew what Lily did and wanted to tell Kourtbut Lily threatened him so he was scared to-

anyways see y'all clowns next week when we all simultaneously lose all motivation for the week without Fridays to look forward to.

[anotherfandomok]

Interactive Introverts Richmond Summary! (Part 1 bc rambling)

Ok. My experience and a general summary. I'm gonna do my best I couldn't believe it was happening, before, after, or during it, and now I can't believe it happened. So.

I didn't get ready way too early this time! I loved my outfit it was so cute, and I drew whiskers on my wrist and my cousin did too :). I went over to my cousin's, and my aunt drove us to my uncle's office in Richmond. He took us to II it was so awesome of him. I was flipping out.

We got there and took pics with the signs and stuff I was vibrating and bouncing and shit I was so excited. We lined up and got in doors opened at six and it was a lot of little short lines so we got in really quickly. Immediately I wanted to go downstairs for merch.

We got in the merch line and like really like ahead in the line I was so proud of getting there so fast.

And I saw the like stand up thing background for the m&g?????? So I was like um wtf are they actually right there like thirty feet away from me? So I was watching it and had my phone ready to video. I SAW PHIL LESTER WITH MY OWN EYES LEAN FORWARD AND HUG SOMEONE. y'all you don't understand his hair is SO. BLACK. like it actually shocked me how black it was I guess it doesn't translate.

But anyway they had the last few people do the m&g, and then they left and Dan waved really quick and we all cheered and I GOT A VIDEO OF THEM AKFNDJSFBWJD.

Also, fan project tonight super cute just a pic of Virginia that said "VA LOVES YOU" I didn't know about it until I got there, but someone handed me a stack and asked me to pass them out and I was like um hell yes so I did that.

Anyway, we moved forward in the merch line and yo the line got so long I was so happy we went straight there omg. The merch setup was like really good! Very efficient they had a long table and everything up with prices and stuff it was so well set up and the guy who helped me was super nice.

I got both short sleeved shirts and the long sleeved shirt, as well as a hat and a poster, and my cousin got the hoodie, a poster, and the marble shirt. Cute as hell! It went really smoothly and quickly it was awesome and we just got right through.

We went to the bathroom and it had a lil ledge so we folded and organized our stuff and then went to the bathroom. Tbh the bathrooms there were REALLY nice, and not crowded at all when I went! The theatre itself was so nice you guys like I can't even believe how nice it was it was so fancy like pretty carpeted soft stairs and everything was so ornate and detailed and pretty. Just omg.

Anyway! Then we went and stood by the front doors for a bit and I handed out signs (if you saw me in the lacy white shirt and black shorts with short blond hair aye!). We sat in balconey D, so we went up (a LOT of stairs) and found our seats!

Seriously I can't overstate how gorgeous and amazing this theatre was so fancy with super soft seats and good room like it was so pretty and it had a ton of like Egyptian stuff on the walls omg it was so cool. Y'all. The set was GORGEOUS. Like the lights and the background and just. Wow. I felt so close even though we were the highest up, because everything was very stacked. We really weren't that far away even though we were towards the back like I could see the stage really well.

The set is so gorgeous wow. And I just jammed to all the songs on the preshow playlist it was so amazing I couldn't believe it was real.

Also Dan's Siri came on like twice and was like hi there's really nice merch downstairs and Dan left me to look at memes and stuff, and told us not to film bc iPads are bad lmao. (I filmed anyway don't arrest me).

Everyone FLIPPED SHIT when Welcome To The Black Parade came on oh my god it was so loud and amazing. The lights dimmed and off we went.

They opened with the really adorable video being projected omg my heart and then they rode in dramatically with their steam and everyone LOST THEIR SHIT it was amazing the crowd was so loud all night.

Phil read the Richmond Wikipedia page apparently (wow, nerd) lmao and talked about the rat basketball team. They literally mentioned the rat basketball team like at least six times throughout the show tonight y'all I'm.

Dan said shooketh at something at the beginning and I don't remember what it was but like djfndjsdbrb. Also he did the Naruto run the first time he ran off stage, and we all sCREAMED.

They did a smol duet of A Whole New World which I now know was inspired by the venue - it was so great though and Dan was like that's not what you want trust me it would start off good but it would quickly become horrible. It sounded really good though like I love them they should sing more.

I hadn't seen any spoilers about the beginning! They talked about what an introvert is and asked the introverts and extroverts in the room to cheer sjfbwjsj.

Dan had a six second challenge to pretend to be a llama sitnfndntkejr he pranced and did a noise we all DIED and then he was like "-NO!" it was hilarious sjfndjsnebd.

The segment about what they weren't gonna do had me shook I nearly died. "Please be gentle with the handcuffs; I have sensitive skin" IM DEAD.

Also when they went to walk up and pretend to strip and then they RIPPED OFF THEIR SHIRTS TO REVEAL IDENTICAL SHIRTS UNDERNEATH YOURE FUCKING KIDDING ME WHAT THE FUCK.

We were all really sad about the puppies so Phil said we'd get to see more puppies later in the show and we all screamed and Dan said if you're gonna promise puppies you better follow through.

When they offered to let people touch their hair I was like sjgbdjdbdjabfsn. Pastel personas skgbsjfkekfje??? They put on flower crowns and brought stuffed animals up to the front of the stage wow my heart.

They were like we're not gonna bring up a whole bunch of other YouTubers - because we have no friends and no one replied to our messages.

I can't remember for shit, but the whole beginning segment was just amazing. When they finished talking about how the show was interactive they were like "so that's why now we're going to make one of you stand up at random!!!!!!!" And they shined all the lights up and for a second it was chaos and then they were like kidding kidding we're just kidding and Phil was like your faces were priceless and Dan was like okay you can tell who the introverts and extroverts are the introverts are like crawling into a ball in their seats like "DONT PICK ME" I've never seen 3000 people curl up into a ball before. It was terrifying but also amazing!

Truth bombs! Honestly, I thought they were gonna do all the ones from the website, but they only did one each.

Phil's torture confession would be being bathed in cheese (Dan talked about if that included scrubbing, or if it included scrubbing under flaps y'all I was so done oh my god), but other options were mouth noises in headphones in his ears (to which Dan then did HORRIBLE and horribly loud mouth noises into his mic oh my god it was the worst thing my ears have ever heard ajtbcjejgsj *vomits* he said "not the asmr you came to hear, sorry") and ??? (Help I forgot)

Dan dreams about Nick Jonas in a fursuit at night ("the two things I lease wanted to hear right now, combined), but other options were a dark abyss ("no that's what I see when I look in the mirror") and a one direction reunion.

They would die from "Bees?" But other options were Dan falling out of the gaming chair and taking Phil down with him, and burning down the flat after setting a fire during a baking video gone horribly wrong (both of the runner ups they said were extremely realistic and plausible and they were like are you guys surprised we aren't dead yet we were all like yah). Dan was like where are the bees going to come from???? THAT FLAP keep you eyes on it.

We're real people with free will so you can't just make us do whatever you want, BUT we have made a simulation with a tiny Dan and Phil where you choose what they would do in completely normal, everyday situations that we experience in real life. Remember, tiny Dan and Phil still have emotions and can feel shame and guilt, so this is our test to see if you are responsible enough to be in control during this show - please do what you would actually want us to do if you were controlling us in real life.

Simulation! They have been working on this since they were FETUSES. Not babies, fetuses they were up in their mom's bellies with laptops editing this, and they spent billions of pounds and thousands of Richmond dollars (idk why they said Richmond dollars so many times during the show but sjtbsjdjd it was cute) on it.

Phil first he went to Barstucks (the simulations didn't want to get sued) and got a unicorn death frappe, with lots of sugar so he was vibrating, and he accidentally tweeted a picture of him in his underwear. Shirtless Satan appears and we all cheered for Satan they were concerned and Phil sold his soul to Satan to take the pic down bc he dropped his phone in his drink lmao. SATAN TAKES HIM TO HELL AND THERES DEMON DAN AND HE HAS A POTATO AND HE POTATO PRESSES PHIL TO DEATH FOR ETERNITY. then Phil was like "I still remember the feeling of a wet potato being pressed to my back" I was like sjbsjsjdsj ew.

Dan talked to the furry in the park and went to a furry rave (didn't show him the good Shiba Inu memes he had) and did body shots off of an otter and entered the ladydoor and slipped on the floor and died in his slothbear fursuit. Lmao rip (I'd already heard that ending though). Dan said the show was officially demonitized, and also said "there was an attempt" after people cheered for the good option lmao.

At the end they were like what a waste of all our billions of dollars and all the time spent editing as fetuses.

At the end of the simulation Phil talked about it being like a mob mentality and Dan compared it to fandoms and how if you like something and everyone else seems to have the same reason for liking it or whatever, the people who it especially means some thing to, their voices can get lost. And that's what this show is all about giving the people what they want and getting all the voices and stuff. Fandoms are often seen as one collective unit but you can't expect them all to want the same thing because they're all made up of very different individuals. Etc. It was good.

Our collective name was Kevin. We did a coordinated clap ("the asmr you do want to hear") it was the coolest fucking thing ever ajrnejfnej to build the hive mind. Then we chose a breed of dog for them to get "they just want us to get a dog Phil that's all they want" and Phil led it he was like I think I can get everyone to think the same thing, and we chose Fluffy the very terrifying Chihuahua it was so cool how they did it and that was the one I got so yay! They asked who didn't get fluffy and then they were like "that's okay that just means you aren't part of Kevin... YET." And then they just kept saying how we needed to get inside Kevin and stuff it was like okay wow.

Then we had the WHATS UNDER DANS BED. First of all that box is fucking hilarious, and I think Dan mentioned Phil just wanting an excuse to use props lmao. They explained it and then Phil brought out the audience participation balls "Phil has three balls." Okay. But they really emphasized how if you didn't want it you could just throw it to someone who did like they were so nice and understanding about it and when the music stopped Phil asked and made sure everyone who had one wanted it :). Also they were like keep the answers like amazingphil channel okay keep it PG. But it was actually a really cool concept and the lights went rainbow when they were throwing them around, which I LOVED! The three answers were an anthill but the ants are tiny dogs, a fursuit made of maltesers, and "I think he's trolling us and it's empty"/nothing. Y'all Phil was like has anyone seen a key under their seat and Dan was like wait what are we talking about wait no no I have the key akfnfjejd. They opened it, got the silver tube, opened that and got the scroll, and then they were like this has been in the tube in the locked box on the stage the whole time how could it possibly say what three random members of the audience said, and then they SLOWLY UNROLLED IT AND IT SAID TINY DOG ANTHILL, FURSUIT, AND NOTHING YALL I WAS SHOOK OUT OF MY MIND LIKE THE ONLY THING THAT COULD HAVE MADE THE SHOW WAS MAGIC AND THEY JUST DID THAT OH MY GOD. I'm still shook about it.

Then Phil took the banner and tore it up into like three or four big pieces and was like okay guys tear it up and pass it around tear and share I was so shook I was like oh my god I want a piece of that banner but obviously I was balconey, so they were ripping off pieces and passing it around and Dan and Phil were like omg it's like the walking dead down there "oh my gosh... That is.. violent." I was so shook that they did that like that was so nice and good like snejdbdabfbo.

Survey! Dan dabbed when he said statistics and Phil was like don't dab to statistics and Dan dabbed again and was like math *dab* there was so much unnecessary dabbing it was wow. Phil likes to use props and costumes so the brought out the glasses and clipboards YALL THEM IN GLASSES IN REAL LIFE 😭. Phil read the options for the audience participation one really dramatically and Dan was like "Phil wrote all the answers to these questions obviously" to which Phil replied "I wanted to make them spicy." 68% like audience participation, sixty some feel like they really know Dan and Phil (8% said who are Dan and Phil and Dan was like where do you think you are Shrek the musical? It was so good. I think Phil said maybe that's the parents. Incredible.) (Unnecessary third option bc Phil wanted to see what would happen - it used the middle screen) 40% like the sims the best, but pinof had 36%. Ditl had 16%, and baking and crafts both had four. They ROASTED the four percent who love crafts lmao it was great. (They spent the whole tour budget on the pie chart for the video series lmao it was FANCY) Sixty percent of people whlant Dan and Phil to give the people what Dan and Phil want, so I was really proud of us and Dan seemed surprised and happy about it he said Augusta was like ninty percent what the people want lmao.

ONE FINAL QUESTION WE ASKED YOU DAN OR PHIL BUT THATS TOO EASY NO WE ASKED YOU WHO WOULD YOU SACRIFICE BUT DAN NO ONES REALLY GOING TO BE SACRIFICED RIGHT THIS IS JUST A QUESTION ON A SURVEY IN A STAGE SHOW "I CAN SAY WHATEVER I WANT ABOUT DAN AND PHIL THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES... RIGHT?"

SUPER DRAMATIC SACRIFICE DAN OR PHIL "YOU MIGHT SAY I CANT CHOOSE TOO BAD THE WORLD IS FULL OF HARD DECISIONS ONE OF US WILL BE STRAPPED TO THIS WHEEL" PHIL SAID "ONE OF US IS GOING TO BE PUT IN MORTAL DANGER RIGHT NOW" AND THEN THEY BOTH JUMPED ONTO THE PLATFORM WITH THE WHEEL AND RODE IT BACKWARDS AND THEN INTERMISSION HOLY FUCKING SHIT THEYRE SO DRAMATIC AND EXTRA OH MY GOD IT WAS INCREDIBLE.

I'm forgetting so much but I'm gonna do this in two parts. Intermission seemed to come so quickly! It was at almost eight forty. Intermission was cool I stood up and stretched my legs bc as soon as I sat down my left leg fell asleep and it's still fucked up the. Some more jams though, and the last song they play was The Final Countdown lmao.

Quick note they are both so beautiful ??? Like?? I couldn't stop staring at their fucking legs oh my god and Dan's knees with his ripped jeans help. Also, I was mesmerised by the way Phil walks? And the way he runs and skips and does little jumps and shit? Like it's actually really graceful his legs are So Long and I'm just obsessed with watching him walk around omg. In summary - Legs ™

Edit: I totally forgot about the airhorn during Truth Bombs ajgbfjrnfsiej it was WILD Phil kept playing with it and pressing buttons to make noises before we even started doing Dan's, and Dan was like omg stop but we were all cheering because obviously it was amazing and Dan was like don't cheer when he does that you're encouraging him and we just cheered louder. (Phil also stroked the airhorn remote - the number of times some variation of the word stroke was said tonight..... So much)

At some point during the beginning they talked about why everyone loves the sims bc you can make people and make them do whatever you want and Phil was like like put a hundred sims in a swimming pool and remove the ladders and watch them drown slowly and I used to do that a lot as a kid does that say something and Dan was like that would explain a lot actually (I swear to God he said that phrase about Phil like three or four times throughout the show like wow). And Phil was like you could also make them woohoo with a skeleton or an alien and HE THRUSTED TO EMPHASIZE HIS POINT I WAS LIKE JESUS FUCK STOP PLEASE.

[dctrplmr]

      IF YOU SEE THIS, I LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE. YOU ARE SO GOOD AT WHAT YOU DO AND THE FACT THAT YOU’RE CONTINUING WITH IT IS SO GREAT!! I KNOW THAT THE DEMON BRAIN CAN GET THE BEST OF YOU SOMETIMES BUT PLEASE REMEMBER THAT PEOPLE FOLLOW YOU FOR A REASON! AND THAT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE RAD AT WHAT YOU DO, NO MATTER WHAT! I LOOK AT RPING LIKE THEATRE (HI, SORRY, THEATRE KID HERE) JUST BECAUSE THE WAY YOU PLAY SOMETHING ISN’T THE SAME AS SOMEONE ELSE’S DOESN’T MEAN THAT IT’S WRONG! IT’S JUST DIFFERENT, BECAUSE WE ALL WRITE AND ACT FROM WHAT WE HAVE ALL EXPERIENCED. IF YOU’RE HAVING FUN, THAT’S ENOUGH. I LOVE Y'ALL. YOU’RE DOING GREAT.

[deadlyfierce]

IF YOU SEE THIS, I LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE. You are so good at what you do and the fact that you're continuing with it is so great!! I know that the Demon Brain can get the best of you sometimes but please remember that people follow you for a reason! And that is because you are rad at what you do, no matter what! I look at rping like theatre (hi, sorry, theatre kid here) just because the way you play something isn't the same as someone else's doesn't mean that it's wrong! It's just different, because we all write and act from what we have all experienced. If you're having fun, that's enough. I love y'all. You're doing great.

[praphit]

IT vs Glenn Close

Look at that mug...

Scared? If you're not scared of that face, I guarantee that you'll be annoyed by that face come Halloween - as you see this face try to snatch all of your candy, rub up against you at Halloween parties... or you might connect your elbow to that face as someone thinks they're being funny when they're actually being obnoxious. Prepare yourself!

If you don't know who this is, it's Pennywise (the dancing clown), and Pennywise feeds off of your child's fear... as well as your child.

Fear is an interesting thing - it's level of effect on us is usually based in knowledge or the lack of knowledge.

Ex. Have y'all ever seen the old movie "Fatal Attraction"? (Glenn Close and Michael Douglas).

Pretty much, the movie is about Glenn Close not being able to accept that M.D. is not that into her, and she becomes criminally obsessive. I saw this movie when I was a kid, and I didn't really get it; it's not thrilling at all - just two adults fighting. Adults are always fighting over something. Now, I'm an adult, and I get it... this movie is scary as hell. The Glenn Close's of the world (and the male equivalents as well) are scarier than any other that paranormal stuff and those Saw movies combined! Watching this movie should be a requirement before using those dating apps. Scary stuff!

I'd take the clown's face over this expression Glenn is making (the "you know you just effed up right?" face) any day.

On the flip side, when I saw "It" for the first time as a child, I was terrified.

But, if I were to watch it today, with the knowledge of how silly clowns actually are, and the knowledge of my kung fu hands...  no fear at all; if anything I'd be angry. Plus, he looks like any old perv...

... just wearing clown makeup. Not only am I not scared, but I'll beat a clown's ass if it shows up in my home! They'll have to make a horror movie about me!

BUT, this is a new day, a new clown, new special effects, new errthang; perhaps all of this newness will renew some fear.

And what's the best way to test out the upgrade of any monster? - surround it with dumbass, defenseless teenagers.

Let me tell you about these teens - they don't come any less innocent than this group of losers here (they call themselves "losers" - they made a club of it! We're living in a world where people are too sensitive. Everyone shouts "don't shame me!" These kids are losers and they know it! Embrace your shame!).

Good actors in this bunch. They really made me believe in their loserdom.

We've got Stranger Things over here.

I mean just look at him. A face that says "please bully me!" Hell of a mouth on that kid though. I don't think I've ever heard a kid use so many F-bombs before. Still he was really funny.

We've got this kid (Bev)

who in her first scene is getting trash dumped on her, as rumors spread that she's been kissing every boy in the neighborhood.

A germaphobe who leaves mama with goodbye kisses in public, a stutterer, a religious kid, my boy chubs...

 and the black kid (I'll get to him in a sec.) Most of these kids acted well - to the point where I felt like picking on them myself. But... why did they have to do the black dude like this?? - he barely had any lines. Throughout the movie I would forget that he was even in it. Every now and then, you hear a "Yeah!" or a "Let's do it, guys!" or a "Shiiiii" - and it's like "Oh right... him."

This actor has a cool name (in real life) though "Chosen"

Lookin like a mini Muhammad Ali - in his endless fight for lines.

But, you get the idea, a group of cool nerds. Well, cool in their own minds, and that's all that matters right?? - until they get beaten up by a group of psychopath white supremacist kids

- I hated these kids.

Takes me back once again to my youth counselor days. It's lesson time: you've gotta have a swear jar for your kids. Slap them upside the head and collect some money. I also used to have a lust jar for when they can't control themselves (and I was a CHRISTIAN counselor, so when I didn't feel as though God was getting enough breathing room - that's right, I collected money.

A fighting jar as well!

And I had a jar that was really for collecting a dumbass kids tax. Then I'd take them out and spend all of the money in front of them (games, clothes, ice cream), but I did it all in love! You can't be soft on kids like these!

Otherwise, you'll have the white supremacist kids, you'll have Stranger Things cursing up a storm; telling dick joke after dick joke after sex with yo mama joke.

You'll have kids like Bev walking around with no clothes on (in a group of boys). Look, I want the young ladies to feel free too, but too free equals babies. NOT ON MY WATCH! Put some clothes on, and throw some money in the lust jar!

I miss those youth counselor days - it was lucrative.

These kids were victims of a lack of counsel. Where were the parents you ask? The parents in this film are terrible. If they're not abusing their child in some way, they're neglecting their child. My boy Chubs gets cut up and beat up nearly everyday. How is that going unnoticed by the parents?!

But, I'm no parent, so maybe what I perceive as neglect is normal. Maybe around the dinner table, when a parent asks their child how their day at school went, and they respond "I got beaten up a lil less by bullies, wrestled with a monster clown, got half naked with my friends, and passed a test." and that's simply typical, and the family proceeds to eat and watch tv. Idk.

If you ask me, the clown has got villainous competition with the parents of the town.

Penny wise, despite all of the smack I was talking about the old version, is a scary ass clown.

Everything they did with the clown in this movie works well. The clown makes the kids hallucinate in public with all kinds of horrific images. And after he scares the kids half to death, he appears with all of the antics you'd expect from a clown who like to eat children.

Even when he's not trying to be creepy, he's being creepy. The director does a good job of sneaking Penny wise up on you. You'll be paranoid when you leave the theatre, that around the corner you might find the clown.

And the actor (BIll Skarsgard) - excellent. I don't know what he had to do to prepare his mind to play this role ( and I don't want to know), but he was perfect.

I'm still more afraid of Glenn Close, but upgraded Pennywise is on a scary level as well.

The only thing I would have liked more of in the movie would be more interaction with the rest of the town and the parents. But, I'll let that slide because the movie is already over two hours long. If they took the time for all of that, it's be close to three hours. I'd also say that if you're comparing this to the old version, you might be slightly disappointed in the lack of back story on the kids, but they're acting makes up for it.

Grade: A, baby!

Another thing that I let slide:

Pennywise has a house in this movie. This clown owns property. I mean the house is all dirty lookin, but it looks like someone is mowing the grass... inside he's got furniture... he's got possessions (fridge, couch, Tv) and a decorator... I'm just sayin that it's funny.

I'm starting to think that the parents of the town know all about Pennywise, and are in fact in cahoots with him. Why else wouldn't they tear down that house?! They don't want those kids! You mean to tell me that kids go missing every week, and the town just functions as normal? None of the adults are concerned. Chubs comes home bleeding talkin bout he got in a fight with a clown, and that's just another day? NO! Cahoots I tell you! Cahoots!

[theworstbob]

the thing journal, 6.11.2017 - 6.17.2017

capsule reviews of the pop culture i took in last week. this week: venice, witness, 1989, gilded, punch-drunk love, sucker, bloody bloody andrew jackson, gone now, boomiverse, melodrama, before sunrise, pinata, whiplash

1) Venice, by Anderson .Paak: Paak might be really close to Greatest Living Songwriter status. Like, Malibu and Yes Lawd! are both undeniable classics, but this is ALSO so solid, solid enough that I feel like, if we get someone in the room with Paak to say, "Hey, dude, maybe don't put a bad butt pun in this one?" Paak could be running the world. Every second of this album is wonderful. Like, .Paak makes songs that make an indoor kid like me wish he was at the beach, that's like the only thing I can say about this album. .Paak' great. I don't have enough words to describe what makes him great.

2) Witness, by Benjamin Booker: ...So, this is the last thing I'm writing? And this was a nice, bluesy rock album that made a Sunday morning slightly doper. I liked it, it was nice, listen to it if you like nice rock albums.

3) 1989, by Tay Tay: I sure do have a lot to say about this album that wasn't said two and a half years ago! I liked it. The first five songs are as good as any five songs on any album that's ever been, and then the rest of this album... Exists? Like there's no way I'm going to call an album with "Shake it Off" and "Bad Blood" on it a classic, and after hearing Lana del Rey songs I can't get behind the Lana del Rey impression that is "Wildest Dreams," like it was already an enh song but knowing it was ripping off an enh thing gives it a firm "no," but any album with "Style" and "Blank Space" and "Style" deserves plaudits, and the album does pick up with the last two tracks, which are up there with the first five tracks as the best stuff Tay Tay has ever done. End of the day, though, To Pimp a Butterfly still should have won Album of the Year, and if at the end of 2014 Catch-Up 1989 is still in the top ten for 2014 (#9 as I write this), I'd be stunned.

4) Gilded, by Jade Jackson: This? was somehow recommended to me by Amazon because I enjoy the music of Paramore. I cannot claim to have heard the Paramore in this. I heard a pretty decent if slow-moving country album! That was a fun surprise! One of my favorite things about country music in 2017 is how, like, we typically associate rebellion with punk and rap, y'know? Loud music that moves fast and is always shouting. And rebellion in country is sitting with just an acoustic guitar and singing sad songs about small towns. Like, a lot of country music is about what a small town home town dirt road party it is to be in the sticks, so the outlaws have to slow it down and reflect on whether they're truly happy where they are. So like, this album has incredibly little in common with Paramore from a music standpoint, but they share an attitude which has to manifest itself differently because of their respective genres. Basically, I'm incredibly down with this album.

5) Punch-Drunk Love, dir. Paul Thomas Anderson: hey. hey guys. did you guys know about this paul thomas anderson dude. he's pretty great. like, everything about that scene where he asks the woman out, the warehouse collapsing, the calls from the phone sex scammer, his sister haranguing him, the woman not knowing how to respond to this, him clearly not knowing how to handle the situation, the pudding the so much pudding, the score building as everything falls apart, it's so fucking good. i remember, when i was 12, this movie had like two whole shelves at hollywood video, and when my dad and my family were looking at this movie, we were like "we love little nicky! but this might be more serious? and poor innocent caralin," and i just, i wonder what a younger me would have thought about this film. i wonder how i would have reacted to this, if we actually had pulled the trigger on punch-drunk love before i was anywhere near ready to handle it.

6) Sucker, by Charli XCX: hahaha i need to do theme weeks or something like i'm supposed to think about a paul thomas anderson joint and then try to come up with a decent opinion about a fine, just a tich below great pop album. i should've eased myself into this, it should've gone punch drunk love, the kimbra album i added to provide the bridge from film master class to pop, and THEN charli xcx. i mean, i enjoyed this a lot, i had a solid, solid bus ride, but like i just need to structure the sequencing of thing journal better. like, maybe don't put the slap-hitting second baseman after the cleanup hitter, but the jason kubel type in the fifth spot, the chunky dude who kinda sucks at baseball but hits dingers more often than not. gotta think about my lineup, guys!

7) Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, wr. Michael Friedman: Well, this was good stupid fun. I think "Ten Little Indians" is a standout track, so clear a standout that it honestly belongs in a better work. It's a distillation of Native American history that doesn't seem to have any place in a musical recasting one of the shittiest presidents as a vain, morose emokid rock star, but then again, I listen to soundtracks and don't watch the shows, so fuck do I know about context. So, yeah, I dug "Ten Little Indians," and then everything else was fine and silly and took itself just unseriously that it never felt like American Psycho. Theatre in general isn't a good home for irony, but at least here, the sarcasm wasn't subtle, it was waving a giant flag the whole time saying "THIS IS DEF JOKES."

8) Gone Now, by Bleachers 9) Melodrama, by Lorde See, if I were a decent listener, I might have tried following up Gone Now with Melodrama. These reviews aren't being indexed in chronological order; I listened to Boomiverse before I gave Melodrama a spin, and looking back, I should've saved Gone Now for Friday to do a Jack Antonoff Power Block. I wonder if my opinion on these albums is colored by the interview I read where Jack Antonoff says he originally imagines all his songs for female voices, he writes his songs for women, then pitches them an octace down should they become Bleachers songs. And I found both Strange Desire and Gone Now to not really resonate with me, neither album really hitting me in the way an entity such as Bleachers should hit me. Bleachers is fun, '80s-inspired pop music -- I love that! But there's this weird disconnect I feel between the voice and the music, and I can't tell if that's a conclusion I arrived at on my own or if it was informed by that article, because while I didn't like Gone Now, I really loved Melodrama. Lorde and Antonoff work perfectly together, her voice gives life to a lot of things I heard but wasn't enthralled by on Gone Now, and they had a vision for this album -- songs have part twos! There's a reprise! ("Liability" is DOPE in the context of this album, y'all) -- which they executed sublimely. It's a complete, cohesive album that feels so much bigger than 11 songs, so full of weird ideas, and while I'm not sure how the mainstream is gonna react, I thought this was dope as hell, "dope as hell" being the highest praise my limited vocabulary has to offer.

10) Boomiverse, by Big Boi: One benefit of being just a dude on tumblr chronicling his experiences is that I didn't have to listen to and write a thinkpiece about a 70-minute Lil Yachty album. I only have to experience Lil Yachty through his features on other people's songs, do not have to contend with the totality of his vision. But, it is disappointing that professional music people DO have to write extended thinkpieces about Lil Yachty, when those words and thoughts and energies would have been far better spent on this album. This album is just good. There's no frills, minimal use of the obligatory Atlanta trap beat, clever rhymes, only occasional misogyny, and maybe the most jubilant rap track of 2017, "All Night." I honestly can't remember the last time I heard a hip-hop joint as joyous as "All Night." So much of my favorite hip-hop of the last few years hasn't been happy, and not even the justifiable "shit's fucked up" unhappy, the "sadness is the only valiid emotion" unhappy, and "All Night" is a statement that darkness is nothing without light.

11) Before Sunrise, dir. Richard Linklater: "Hey! I've been up since 1 AM, and it is presently 4:30! I'm going to put on this quet movie about a quiet night in Vienna so I can watch Before Sunrise before sunrise, LOL!" Yeah so I fell asleep during this one, team. Not long enough to feel like I missed a lot, not long enough for this film to lose its impact, but enough to feel like I failed this film. What I was able to see was great. It was like someone shot a podcast in Vienna, and that sounds like an insult, but I'm into movies that are just two people talking to each other, and I'd be into a podcast where two strangers try to fall in love in two hours, two people bullshitting about love and relationships and the future while wondering if they could be happy with the other person outside of the podcast. It didn't feel at all tempered knowing there's a sequel in the queue. Like, knowing these two people see each other again is disappointing, only in the sense that I don't get to live with the ending for 10 years before learning about the sequel, but at the same time, the characters don't know they're going to see each other again, and that last goodbye at the train is so heart-wrenching, the way she disappears behind the wall and the guy just follows her, trying to stay as close to her as possible.

12) Pinata, by Freddie Gibbs & Madlib: I will let nature review this album for me: I live in a garden level apartment, and outside my bedroom window, where I stationed my new computer, there's a bucket beneath the gutter in which water rests. Squirrels will occasionally come through, take a sip, and bounce. But as I was listening to this album, I saw that the squirrel was lingering outside my window. I assumed it was responding well to the vibrations created by Freddie Gibbs' pleasant, deep-voiced flow and the low-key production, and that it was enjoying the things it was feeling. This is music squirrels can enjoy, man, what more do you want. And then a Danny Brown feature came on, and that squirrel RAN, man. Like, I get it? I wouldn't expect a squirrel to respond well to Danny Brown, but I still feel that squirrel is missing out.

13) Whiplash, dir. Damien Chazelle: When I listen to music, I've found I connect to the drumming more than anything but the lyrics. Part of the reason I still listen to pop/punk is because literally every single pop/punk drummer is amazing, drumming so so fast every time. I also watch sports and speedrun streams, and one of the things that fascinates me is the maniacal drive to be great, this obsessive need to push yourself to some limit most would find unnecessary. So of COURSE I'm into a film which would marry the two, and which had the performance of a lifetime from JK Simmons, JK Simmons deserving all the plaudits he got for playing Malcom Tucker's long-lost American twin. I think Miles Teller was cat perfectly for the scenes where he's with JK Simmons, an arrogant nothing-boy who can convey talent and cluelessness, but Miles Teller is such a zero that the scenes with his family and girlfriend, where we're supposed to say "no nice boy don't isolate yourself from your loved ones to drum so good," just felt like "god shut the fuck up you whiny jerk." The film also didn't really address a couple of questions I thought might be relevant to the JK Simmons character. Does music still retain its meaning if you obsess over it to the extent that Fletcher does, do people still respond to his performances on an emotional level, or do they appreciate it on a purely technical level? There's that dinner scene, where someone in Miles Teller's family asks, "How can you have a music competition? Isn't it subjective?" and Miles Teller says, "No," but it never explores the idea of what chasing the parts of music which can be judged objective does to the music. The other question is, what right does Fletcher have to the next Charlie Parker? How does this white dude think he can own jazz? But I've spent more words finding what's problematic about the film than I did on what I liked, which is usually the sign of a great film, one I wanted to spend a lot of words thinking about.

[theactor007]

101 questions: Answers

Ok since SOMEONE wanted me to answer all 101 questions...( if it's the person I'm thinking it is...just know you suck). It's almost 6 in the morning be grateful. So here we go! Long add post ahead just a fair warning. (I need to stop reblogging this crap.)

1. I have white walls, blue carpet, black desk, and a variety of colors and hues due to posters, pops, collectables, etc.

2. Probably my drama/ Chorus teacher, Mrs. Monahan. She's the one who taught me the most about my life.

3. Theatre, Kingdom Hearts, learning, laughing, Lilo and Stitch, (wow I'm a dork)

4. Lol I don't drink coffee

5. My so called "dad bod." How I am with women I like.

6. Accept that you have flaws. They are as much a part of you as the good stuff. But don't focus on the bad focus on what makes you strong, unique. You are you and that's beautiful.

7. I do not have stuff animals.

8. Probably drawing.

9. Usually in the fetal position on my right side on the left side of my bed.

10. Being on stage, the imagination of kids, making someone else smile.

11. Small town easily.

12. Two story house on the beach. Hardwood floors, a balcony overlooking the water, and a game room.

13. I'd honestly love like three dogs. A husky/wolf mix, Tibetan Mastiff, and a Shepard.

14. I have not dyed my hair as of now. But I am looking into getting some darker low lights. I'm yet.

15. To each his own. I personally don't have one, but I'm not gonna judge if you do.

16. Look at 15.

17. Art is all around you. Just use what you see and feel to guide your pen/brush/body etc.

18. I was in middle school. I just got off the bus, was in a really good mood bopping along. I walk in the house, didn't even lay my bad down when I saw my sister with tears in her eyes. She looks at me and says We're picking Funeral music now. My Great Grandmother. So yea.

19. Not so much playlists as much in the order they are in my phone.

20.

My best friend, Nate, Kerry, a few others.

21. Honestly as much as I try to, no. My main priority is making Every one else happy. Usually.

22. Usually typos.

23. Demon Hunter if you like metal. Dear Evan Hansen is amazing. I've been listening to Gorillaz recently so them too.

24. Plain.

25. Yea it's worth a shot at least

26. Nah I didn't see the eclipse. Tried to. But nope not really.

27. Nature is peace. Makes you realize you a part of something bigger than you. The birds chirping, the breeze, just beautiful.

28. Well I'm a hardworking, kind-hearted, socially awkward 22 year old. I enjoy theatre, video games, and making people happy. I will do anything and everything for my friends. I'm a proud dork, but with a wise mind.

29. I listen to basically anything. My music goes from Heavy metal to rap To Game music to Broadway to Disney to 80s.

30.

Probably Hot Topic. Most of my wardrobe is graphic tees. And no better place to get it from Hot Topic.

31.

I really don't shop at either. Name brand I guess?

32. What are s.o clothes?

33. I started Tumblr 2-3 years ago..something like that. I made it cause the girl I liked said I should make one. She help me make it and everything.

34. Wash my face every now and then. I really don't have a face care plan tbh

35. I prefer freckles, but both are equally cute!

36. Hate. And peas.

37. I used to have hot wheels cars. I loved organizing them into lines. Drive em around and line em up. Idk I was wierd.

38. Eh depends on the day

39. Games I use. Pops just sit there. I really don't buy a whole lot of expensive things.

40. Standardized testing in schools. Don't get me started.

41. I am constantly asking for advice. Can't learn if you don't know.

42. I mean prefer bras off but anyway!

43. Lol comfy. T-shirt, shorts, and flip flops is where it's at!

44. Honestly one of the better dates I've gone on. We went to the jazz festival and ended up going to a very nice restaurant. Watched the band play for a while. Went to the movies after and then went back to her place and we talked for like 3 hours. It was a good time. (She later went on to break my heart, but moving on!)

45. I am Christianso that should answer it.

46. I don't drink nearly enough water. I should drink more but I don't.

47. I mean it's good. It's unique. My hair naturally makes a nice little swoop so that's nice.

48. It's cloudy but the sun should be rising here soon.

49.

I'd like to think of be a King, but chances are I'd be a Prince. More like the Other Prince in Into the Woods. The one who isn't Charming.

50. If I'm dressing up it's my black button up, blue jeans, and whatever the nicest pair of sneakers is. (I don't dress up a lot)

51. My hair, my kind-heart, my ethics,

52. I'd like to think I'm open minded.

53. I don't judge. Come as you are. Everyone's got stuff that has made them who they are. If I can be one person who they can talk to about that stuff then I've done my job.

54.

I like to plan ahead as much as I can, but I have ADD so you do the math.

55.

Love learning, Hate the education system.

56.

German Shepard/Sharpei mix named Stitch. He's about 70 pounds of fluff and is as much a dork as I am. He's all bark no bite. Hes loves whoever comes in.

57. I don't like milk.

58. Kingdom Hearts, Disney, Overwatch, LOZ, Assassins Creed, oh and Lilo and Stitch.

59. Pandora.

60. Brave.

61. LILO AND STITCH!

62. (I'm getting my questions from my gallery cause I'm on mobile and I didn't get 62 so yea)

63. Once I get the notification that it needs to be updated it takes me like two weeks of ignoring it to actually update. Once I get tired of the notifications like 20 min.

64. I'm in mobile so it's this stupid question list. I still hate you.

65. Lilo and Stitch probably. STITCH and I have a lot in common. The themes, soundtrack, artwork absotuly beautiful. The jokes are still funny. The characters still amaze me. Just amazing.

66. I've seen one Studio Ghibli movie, Princess Monoke and I enjoyed it.

67.

If I'm playing games headphones are off. If music it's cranking loud as it can get!

68. All the time if by doing small things even If I don't say it verbally.

69. Kingdom Hearts, pops, Lilo and Stitch, I feel like I've answered this question a couple times.

70. God I want a partner. Someone to cuddle with, talk about life with, someone who will listen to me and support me. Someone I can be me around with.

71. Dr. Pepper

72. I'll talk to anyone who will listen. But the person who knew me the best and most intimately was the reason I created this Tumblr. Hope your doing well kid.

73. Ok let's see. Thomas Sanders' personal blog, FuckyeahKingdomHearts, the few mutuals I have, y'all know who you are,

74. To be truly happy with the one I'm supposed to spend forever with.

75. Of course! Is there any other place to sing?

76. I shave like once a week maybe. Mostly the cheeks. I trim my mustache and goatee if needed.

77. Over worrying.

78. Sometimes.

79. There are good and bad days. I try to.

80. It was like freshman year ( maybe 8th grade.) But I went with some friends around a riche part of town. Lol I went as Joseph from the Bible, like no joke. Got a lot of candy. It was good time.

81. It was the last day of third grade. I went to climb the monkey bars. I got to the first bar and fell cause my hands were sweaty. Bit my head on all three rungs to the ladder on the way down. Busted my head open and went home early. I think I still have the scar.

82. I'm tired man it's late for me. Long night at work.

83. My stupid ass had to reblog this. And I was expecting like answer like a few questions. No big deal. NOPE!! Some anon was like hey do All of em! So here I am on mobile, without Wi-Fi, I've been working all night, I've had to take pictures of this just so I can get it done. And I've been going at this now for like 2 hours. It's past my bedtime! I'm pretty sure I know who asked me this, because they have a habit of asking this type stuff. And if it is just know you suck so much. Ok end rant.

84. I say i don't care what people think, but I do. A lot. I worry that I'm being annoying or that I'm being that kid that everyone says hi to out of pity. I worry that I may bother some people. When in a relationship i constantly worry that I'm not doing my job right. That I've made her unhappy or something. It's a bad habit.

85. If both parties are working at it yes. Long distance can work. You gotta have a lot of trust. If there's the slightest bit of mistrust it can crumble in an instant.

86. Depending on how much younger. And yea if date someone older. I went on a date with a 35 year old once. Granted didn't know she was 35 till the date but she still had a great time.

87. Jim Carrey, the late Robin Williams, my great-grandfather whom I was named after, Obama, Hayley Joel Is many, the voice of Stitch.

88. I honestly don't remember.

89. 21st. I got my tattoo on the day before. Then me and my friends went to Disney Springs for the day and had a great time. A lot of laughs. I didn't drink but still had a great time!

[xwing-baby]

I got Tagged!

I got tagged by the ever lovely @bcr36!

1. Coke or Pepsi? Pepsi 2. Disney or Dreamworks? Both! 3. Coffee or Tea? Tea! All day everyday baby! 4. Books or Movies? Both… 5. Windows or Mac? Windows but Mac’s are so pretty :) 6. DC or Marvel? Marvel 7. Xbox or Playstation? I mean, I had a playstation 2 when I was a kid so does that count?? 8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect? Neither. 9. Night Owl or Early Riser? Both, because I get up early and stay up late haha 10. Chess or Cards? Cards. 11. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate! 12. Vans or Converse? Can I have both?? 13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash or Adaar? Bless you. 14. Fluff or Angst? Reading? Both. Writing? Angst. 15. Beach or Forest? Forest… unless I can just sit on the beach and not go in the water, the sea TERRIFIES me. 16. Dogs or Cats? Dogs! I have two and they are my babies and my brothers. 17. Clear skies or rain? Clear skies, nice and warm too thanks. 18. Cooking or Eating out? Eating out! I get so bored cooking, definitely going to have to marry a chef lol. 19. Spicy or mild food? Spicy 20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: Christmas (though I really am not bothered by any of them tbh) 21. Would you rather be forever a little too cold or a little too hot? Too cold! 22. If you could have a superpower, what would it be? Teleportation so I could go visit my friends and family around the world for free. 23. Animation or Live action? Live action! 24. Paragon or Renegade? A who now? 25. Baths or Showers? Showers because I’m too tall to fit in my bath comfortably :( 26. Team Cap or Team Iron Man? As much as I love Iron Man, Team Cap all the way! 27. Fantasy or Sci-Fi? Sci-Fi! Give me Star Wars any day lads! 28. Do you have three or four favourite quotes? If so what are they: “I am inimitable, I am an original,” -Hamilton: An American Musical.

Thats the main one really. Sorry haha 29. Youtube or Netflix: Both! 30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson? Harry Potter!! 31. When you feel accomplished? When y'all like and reblog my work and when I finally finish or understand something hard at school. 32. Stars Wars or Star Trek? Star Wars ftw! But Star Trek ain’t half bad either 33. Paperback or Hardback books? Paperback, I’m mean to my books and bend them a bit (I know what a heathen) so paperback is easier! 34. Handwriting or typing? Depends. 35. Velvet or Satin? Satin. 36. Video games or Movies? Movies. 37. Would you rather be a dragon or own a dragon? Own one! 38. Sunrise or Sunset? Sunset. 39. What’s your favourite song? Changes all the time can’t pick. 40. Horror Movies? Yes or No? Nope nope nope nope nope nope. 41. Long or short hair? Short, I cut 10-12 inches off my hair last summer and its the best thing I’ve ever done. 42. Opera or Theatre? Theatre but I’d love to see an opera one day… 43. If you had to eat one thing for the rest of your life what would it be? No idea… maybe digestives? 44. Older guys or younger guys? Older. 45. If you could erase one show from history what would it be? TOWIE 46. What’s one thing on your bucket list? Meet the Queen of England.

Tagging my normal squad but anyone else can play too!! @bethany @lindsaylove1226 @mybittersweetbullshituniverse

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs, 4.14.2007 + 4.15.2017

the songs that debuted on the billboard chart this week and ten years ago this week. today: buttrock confessions

4.14.2007

40) "Ticks," Brad Paisley

So I watched the whole entire CMAs instead of Game 7 of the World Series and don't regret a single choice I made (the game went into extras, you don’t really have to watch baseball until the ninth inning tbh), and it struck me how much of a dorky theatre kid Brad Paisley was. He's objectively a great guitarist, like hokey as this song is and as little I know about music I think that's a dope fucking guitar line, but gosh darn, he was trying so hard the whole time at those CMAS! And that puts a song like this in perspective, because, like I said, it's hokey as fuck, but if you can just understand that Brad Paisley's sense of humor is that of someone who understands that being funny is a way to be Liked and is trying his best to be Liked, it sort of comes together and you can brush it off.

75) "We Takin' Over," DJ Khaled ft./T.I., Akon, Rick Ross, Fat Joe, Lil' Wayne, Baby

FUCK DUDE LIL' WAYNE USED TO BE GOOD. Like OK I think we all know I wanted to come here and be like "look at the humble beginnings of the meme man! He wasn't such a meme in these days!" but then there was a Lil' Wayne verse where he wasn't fucking around with Auto-tune, he was just rapping, and he was such a good fucking rapper that I'm actually angrier at the two "verses" he had on those Nicki Minaj songs a couple weeks back. It's not even one of his more notable verses, I don't think, it was just a normal 10-year-old Wayne verse, but I'm still here like, what a treat, a Lil' Wanye feature I don't mind! How lucky we were in 2007!

78) "Little Wonders," Rob Thomas

it is good to remember things that are nice! the lyric video i watched for this song ended with this message from the editor: "Believe in yourself, follow your dreams, and never, EVER give up =)." i would have much rather someone had just repeated those words over and over for three and a half minutes than listened to this song. DANNY ELFMAN?! fuck are you doing here, danny elfman? are you lost?

79) "Hey There Delilah," Plain White T's

There is nothing I could say about this song that would be worth saying.

82) "I Tried," Bone Thugs-N-Harmony ft./Akon

a'ight, see, now i feel better about bumping pink and jordan pruitt from the top 20, because it won't be some buttrock heroes what bumps 'em, it'll be a legit impressive, heartfelt song. i'm kinda surprised i don't remember this! now i just gotta contend with the fact most of both top 20s are gonna be dudes. but like most of these songs are dudes. this week is all dudes. next week is a 7:2 dude-to-lady ratio. last week was 2:1. maybe less dudes? idk, recency bias is doin' work, but at least two weeks from now, we're gonna get some dope tunes.

87) "Get Buck," Young Buck

HOLY SHIT THIS FUCKING BEAT THE TUBA HAS NEVER HAD A BETTER DAY IN ITS LIFE. OK, this is the first 2007 track I think has been unjustifiably forgotten by time. “Say OK” hit me, but I think that was just a moment for me. This is objectively a classic, this fucking beat, man. Young Buck doesn't add a ton to the proceedings, but he doesn't ruin anything, his gruff, shouty flow is perfect for the beat, and I'll admit, I got a dark chuckle out of the "I can serve Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown" line. This was fuckin' rad, y'all, the best "new to me" song I've heard so far. Seriously this beat, how have we not found a better home for it, how did no one else latch onto it. A strong silver medalist in the "Southern rap songs with the word 'buck' in the title" category.

89) "A Woman's Love," Alan Jackson

Alan Jackson, last seen walking out on Beyonce's performance at the CMAs, is here singing a jaunty tune about how one time he fucked.

91) "Love Today," MIKA

i mean it's just a good song, man, i dunno. i'm allowed to just say when a song is solid and something i can jam to, right, when i don't think i have anything to justify? it's low-rent scissor sisters. I'LL TAKE THAT ANY DAY OF THE WEEK. solid week.

95) "Forever," Papa Roach

...oh goddamnit i love this song. No, you don't... Lemme explain. I need to explain, so lemme. So, I listened to a lot of the local buttrock station in my teens, because that's what the radio at the auto shop where I worked was always tuned to, was 93X. And, I dunno, there's a lot of bullshit I forgot and a lot of shit too horrible to purge from the mind, I've heard the acoustic version of Staind's "Outside" more times than any man ever should, but there were some songs where the Stockholm Syndrome hit, and you were like, "Well, maybe Chevelle isn't ALL bad." This was definitely the point where I was like, "Hey, this is the one decent Papa Roach song!" I was legit angry when I realized this was that song, I forgot I ever loved a Papa Roach song, I was 10000% sure this was a cover because there was no way I was going to go anywhere but IN on this song, but no, this is a song I shouted in the shower at least five times. I'm so disappointed in myself right now, but... But, yeah, this is, I can’t quite place where they cribbed the verses from but they cribbed well, the chorus is shouty and fake-deep like all the great buttrock songs, and I love that ending, the “one last kiss” thing over that bass line, without reservation. We have to be true to who we were, and who we are is never fully removed from who we were. I hate this. I hate having to admit this. THE ONE PAPA ROACH SONG I FUCK WITH, AND IT HAS TO BE PART OF THIS PROJECT. I HAVE TO TALK ABOUT A KENDRICK LAMAR SONG SOON, AND HERE I AM, FUCKING WITH A PAPA ROACH SONG, THROWING MY CRITICAL AUTHORITY OUT WITH THE BATHWATER.

97) "Breath," Breaking Benjamin

I have less reservations about loving a Breaking Benjamin song, though, because Breaking Benjamin wasn't fake-deep like Papa Roach. ("My feelings for you are forever." God, that's stupid. I love a very stupid thing.) No, Breaking Benjamin was legit dark, they were a buttrock band I knew was OK because my friend who ended up going to a semi-prestigious art high school of some renown was into them. Is it the same song as "The Diary of Jane?" Yeah, kinda, there's more than a little resemblance, "THE DIARY OF JANE" IS A LEGIT GREAT SONG AND BITING THAT SONG IS A SMART MOVE.

At least Papa Roach couldn’t crack the Top 20. 2007: gaining strength! 20) "Get it Shawty," by Lloyd (3.31.2007) 19) "Break 'Em Off," by Paul Wall ft./Lil' KeKe (3.10.2007) 18) "My Oh My," by The Wreckers (1.27.2007) 17) "Mr. Jones," by Mike Jones (1.27.2007) 16) "Settlin'," by Sugarland (2.17.2007) 15) "I Tried," by Bone Thugs 'n Harmony (4.21.2007) 14) "Movin' On," by Elliott Yamin (3.17.2007) 13) "U + Ur Hand," by P!nk (1.13.2007) 12) "Doe Boy Fresh," by Three 6 Mafia ft./Chamillionaire (1.20.2007) 11) "Breath," by Breaking Benjamin (4.21.2007) 10) "Beautiful Liar," by Beyonce & Shakira (3.31.2007) 9) "Cupid's Chokehold," by Gym Class Heroes ft./Patrick Stump (1.13.2007) 8) "The River," by Good Charlotte ft./M. Shadows & Synyster Gates (2.10.2007) 7) "Say OK," by Vanessa Hudgens (2.17.2007) 6) "Alyssa Lies," by Jason Michael Carroll (1.13.2007) 5) "Get Buck," by Young Buck (4.21.2007) 4) "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going," by Jennifer Hudson (1.13.2007) 3) "Candyman," by Christina Aguilera (1.13.2007) 2) "Because of You," by Ne-Yo (3.17.2007) 1) "Dashboard," by Modest Mouse (2.17.2007)

4.15.2017

22) "The Heart Part 4," by Kendrick Lamar

I mean, with the way I do this thing, everything that's been said about this song has been said, and I'm hella late to the party, trying to get another round of Pin the Tail on the Donkey started. "You didn't have fun without me, I'm about to have fun WITH you!" No Bob! we already played that game Bob!. "BLINDFOLD ME!" I think it's vitally important that Kendrick Lamar remind everyone that he's the best MC alive right now, because he is, and gosh, he just fucking raps for four minutes. Barely a hook, just Kendrick Lamar verses and flows for a solid four minutes, and I'm really curious how many rappers could sustain a song for four (mostly) uninterrupted minutes just on their own. Minimalist production, it's just your voice and your words. I'd put Danny Brown in that category, but it'd be a bleak-ass four minutes. I want to put Killer Mike in that category, but I have to think there's a reason he works best in a duo. I'd want to listen to what four minutes of undiulted Young Thug would sound like?, but more out of curiosity than belief in his ability. And I mean Kendrick's the only one in the popular consciousness who could do it, no fuckin’ question, there's no one in the mainstream rap world anywhere NEAR his level. (Kendrick Lamar is barely mainstream, of course, and that fact is a source of much consternation on this song, like there's no way the entire Kendrick album breaks the Hot 100 like the entire Drake album did, but he was in a Tay Tay song the one time and that's enough.) Just listening to Kendrick Lamar rap is one of the most thrilling songs I've heard for YAS 2017. Honestly, I'm ranking it too low in the Top 20, but only because I have to think better things are on their way and am wary of that recency bias wave.

49) "XO Tour Lif3," by Lil Uzi Vert

Congratulations on being the modern rap song which followed "The Heart Part 4!" You were always going to suffer in comparison, and while I regret that it happened to you, I hope you understand it had to happen to someone. I mean, this is a three-minute song, and at some point I got bored enough that I forgot I was supposed to be paying attention to come up with an observation and/or a joke and did other things. Not even shit I needed to take care of, I checked Facebook and thought about getting a glass of milk until he started saying all his friends are dead, like what?, oh okay I guess that's how this song ends then, OH FUCK well prolly not worth dipping back in if I got that distracted.

61) "Speak to a Girl," by Tim McGraw & Faith Hill

So over the last four weeks, only three women have had tracks debut on the Hot 100. That's pretty cool. One of the three dudes who wrote this song, about what a girl REALLY wants from a man, was also a co-writer on Jason Derulo's "Wiggle," which is, I mean, I'm going off Wikipedia, I'm hopeful this is too awful to be true, but if it isn't, how does that dude sleep at night? What does that dude believe in? Who is his god, just, to what moral authority is our man Joe London holding himself accountable? Do Not Trust Joe London. Another of the songwriters worked with a band called Confederate Railroad. Country music is the coolest. I'm so proud to like this genre.

66) "Still Got Time," by ZAYN ft./PARTYNEXTDOOR

First of all, we need to take a minute to discuss the sheer disrespect for the concept of caps lock expressed by ZAYN and PARTYNEXTDOOR. This is a mumblecore pop song, and I must insist these dudes cease using all capital letters until they prove they're capable of expressing excitement. Other than that gripe, though, I dunno, I didn't have a bad time! I enjoyed it about as much as I did "Running Back" a few weeks ago, it didn't light this Tuesday evening on fire, but it was a chill groove, and I appreciated the B+ to which all involved contributed. Also, new favorite Wikipedia line: "Shane Lindstrom, professionally known as Murda Beatz." One, professionally known. Two, imagine ever asking someone to call you Murda. Gosh, what a stupid fucking stage name. (Stage name? Backstage name? Why do you need an alias bro you're a fucking producer, you don't get to have a fake name, the fuck makes you think you can have a fake name. Even Swizz Beatz rapped sometimes, what is your goddamned problem Murda Beatz.)

2017′s Top 20! I lowered “Run Up” again. I miss it dearly but I can’t pretend I liked it more than “Green Light.” 20) "Swalla," by Jason Derulo ft./Nicki Minaj & Ty Dolla $ign (4.8) 19) "Light," by Big Sean ft./Jeremih (2.25) 18) "Everyday," by Ariana Grande ft./Future (3.4) 17) "Draco," by Future (3.11) 16) "Guys My Age," by Hey Violet (2.11) 15) "Good Drank," by 2 Chainz ft./Gucci Mane & Quavo (2.11) 14) "Yeah Boy," Kelsea Ballerini (3.4) 13) "Selfish," by Future ft./Rihanna (3.18) 12) "Slide," by Calvin Harris ft./Frank Ocean & Migos (3.18) 11) "It Ain't Me," by Kygo x Selena Gomez (3.4) 10) "Now & Later," by Sage the Gemini (2.25) 9) "Shape of You," by Ed Sheeran (1.28) 8) "That's What I Like," by Bruno Mars (3.4) 7) "The Heart Part 4," by Kendrick Lamar (4.15) 6) "Chanel," by Frank Ocean ft./A$AP Rocky (4.1) 5) "Run Up," by Major Lazer ft./PARTYNEXTDOOR & Nicki Minaj (2.18) 4) "Green Light," by Lorde (3.18) 3) "Despacito," by Luis Fonsi ft./Daddy Yankee (2.4) 2) "Issues," by Julia Michaels (2.11) 1) "iSpy," by KYLE ft./Lil Yachty (1.14) how the fuck did “swalla” make it two weeks Also, I know there was a new Iggy Azalea song, and I’m just gonna say, if having to listen to 21 Drake songs was the price I paid to not have to hear 1 Iggy Azalea song, I will have been glad to have paid the toll. That is a reasonable trade, one I would never say no to. Boy I hope it doesn’t debut next week! Also: “iSpy” in the for-real top five! That’s so dope! I’m happy for that song!

Who won the week?

2007 had the stronger showing this week, and let’s be real, I think it’s out-paced 2017 at this point. 2007′s at the point where “Get It Shawty” is hanging on by a thread while “Grace Kelly” and “Outside Looking In” are outside looking in. 2017 needs to step its game up. We’re two weeks from “Umbrella.” Is that so much to ask, is for just one instant classic era-defining monster jam that shatters the world? Come on, 2017! 2007: 2 2017: 1