#y'all know I can't be normal about these two what do you expect

[the-14th-ghost]

Alright, I'm fueling the fire, ya freaky weirdos

Henry Hotline SFW alphabet headcanons

Henry Hotline x reader

☎️Affection-

This man sezies every opportunity to show you that he loves you. Even if you're doing nothing. He'll compliment you, hug you, kiss you

Even if he is around Frankie or Deputy Duck, he doesn't care. Expect the best hugs you can get out of a cartoon character.

His go-to form of affection is definitely compliments and physical affection

☎️Best friend-

If he's just your best friend, he'll always have your back. Need someone to vent to? Oh wow, he just so magically appeared next to you! Or you just want a buddy to hang out with? Well, good thing his show is just so happens to be canceled. He'll do anything for his closest friend

☎️Cuddles-

This man LOVES to give cuddles. Even if he's busy with something like planning out his show or spending time with the contestants. He'll drop everything for you.

And let me tell you, when he hugs or cuddles you, he does not let go for hours. You could always ask him to let go whenever you want to, but we all know he doesn't want to lose you.

☎️Domestic-

The truth is, he'd only do stuff if HE wanted to do it. If you ask him to mop the blood off of the floor or something, he'll look at you like you just lost your mind. Maybe if you give him a kiss or two, his might do what you ask him

But we all know he's a sucker for making you happy. So he'll do some chores only when you're not looking.

☎️Ending-

Over the phone. Yes, that is a stupid way to break up with someone, but he doesn't know any other way that feels right! But don't worry, he'll never break up with you, he loves you too much! But he still has a plan, just in case

☎️Fiance(e)-

Y'all really wanna marry a cartoon character? Same

He's not too big on the whole "Settling down, getting married, and starting a family" trope. He's fine if you REALLY wanna marry him. As long as it won't hinder his work and he still gets to talk in his talk show, then by all mean, slap that ring on his finger pronto! He doesn't have all day! or if you ever want him to give you a ring, just let him know

☎️Gentle-

This phone guy wannabe loves you too much to hurt you. If there is ever a time when his headaches just get to him and he needs to let out some anger. He's leaving the room, and you won't see him until he's fully calmed down

But in normal situations where he's chill, he's so gentle around you. Kisses so light that you'll think you're touching a feather. Hugs so gentle it feels like you're hugging a teddy bear.

☎️Hugs-

Like mentioned earlier, he gives the best hugs. It'll literally leave you craving more like some sort of sweet candy.

If you ever need a hug, you know he'll always give you one

☎️I love you-

That's how he confessed, goofy! He was so nervous about asking you out that he just blurted out his feelings!

And don't you worry, he always reminds you anytime you need it. But when you don't, he still says he loves you! He loves you so much!

☎️Jealousy-

Due to his massive ego, he tends to get quite jealous. Mainly around Deputy Duck and Frankie. Especially Deputy Duck. He can't help it! He just wants everyone to know that he's the one who loves you the most

☎️Kisses-

Very very soft and passionate! Almost as if he's afraid to scare you. He knows how easily angered he gets due to his headaches, so he's just trying to make both of you happy.

He's angry? Give him one small smooch and he's floored

☎️Little one-

Surprisingly, he secretly hates kids. Especially if they try to call him. Over and over again he has been called. He can't even look at a child without getting a headache.

☎️Morning-

He does the most goofy lovey-dovey shit every morning. If you guys share a bed, he is kissing your face every morning. And if you don't share a bed, he always wakes you up with a kiss on the forehead and a soft "good morning, my dear"

I'm sorry but him saying "My dear" sends me

☎️Night-

He has the most elaborate bedtime routine ever. Skin care and all. And he'd obviously sleep in one of those fancy pink night robes, also with a face mask.

Also, he sleeps like a rock. Nothing can wake him up. Not even a train horn. Except maybe a kiss or two

☎️Open-

It'll take him a while to open up to you. Not because he's scared, it's because he's too flustered to say anything. But once he finally gets used to dating you, he starts talking to you about everything. His talk-show, his rivalry with Deputy Duck, his splitting headaches, and the list goes on and on

☎️Patience-

Due to his constant headaches, he gets angered quite easily. And it can lead to some arguments here and there. Nothing too bad, just some petty words thrown. All you have to do is let him calm down with some time by himself. Once he's back to normal, he'll mumble about how he's sorry for being so rude to you and how you didn't deserve it. He'll never hurt you :)

☎️Quizzes-

This guy remembers nearly everything about you. Your favorite restaurant, color, song, book. Anything! It'll honestly leave you speechless. Like, if you mention something you like a month ago, he still remembers it to this day. He really does love you.

☎️Security-

If someone is bothering you, his hand is immediately on your waist or back. This man has to let everyone know that you're both dating. Not a single soul can split you two apart.

But normally, he's chill when it comes to being protective. He's not too overbearing about it

☎️Try-

He goes all out when it comes to birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays.

On anniversaries, he lays flower petals all over, lights candles, and treats you to a well-deserved meal.

With holidays, he would help you set up anything. Need help putting lights up? He's tall. He's got it! Need help making food? Well, he'll give it a shot!

☎️Ugly-

His ego. Sometimes you two get into petty arguments and he can't see past himself. It's what HE wants. It's all about HIM. But like I said before, he'll apologize for any negative things he's said to you.

☎️-Vanity

This man spends HOURS in the morning just making sure he looks good. Even if you tell him he's perfect the way he is, he'll be flattered but he won't stop. Sometimes, he might even put on black lipstick or eyeshadow. He likes it when you kiss him and he has to redo his lipstick over and over again.

☎️-Whole

He gets so lonely when you're not around. Yeah, he'll still go on with his day, but he'll be a lot less talkative and sassy. But once you come back, it's like a child receiving a puppy for Christmas

"My love! Where have you been?!"

"I was in the bathroom. . ."

☎️Xtra-

Dance with him! He loves it! You could put on some swingy jazz or a soft romantic, he doesn't care! He just loves having you in his arms and spinning around with you!

☎️You-

He talks about you all the time. With Frankie, with Deputy Duck, and in his talk show. He loves babbling on and on about his beloved! Everyone knows he's one for showing off, especially things he likes!

"They're so cool, amazing, glorious, funny, outstanding, and-"

"GET OU-"

☎️Zzz-

OK this might sound weird but, he does snore but like not normally. Instead, his phone rings. Every time he breathes out his phone rings. And loudly too. If you share a bed, you'd probably have to either tolerate the noise or wear ear plugs

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Aaaaahh I'm sorry if this sucked. This was my first time ever writing something like this 🫠

Anyway, Henry is hot, you're cool, and goodbye

[peaches2217]

"Say, Peaches, what sorts of picturesque scenarios are bouncing around in that big brain of yours tonight?" Oh I'm so glad you asked!

The answer: Mareach Honeymoon, Day 1.

Little private island getaway somewhere near Bubblaine, because Peach doesn't know the meaning of the word moderation and wants to give herself and her husband the most laid-back fun week of their lives. A Princess-now-Queen Regent and a world-famous war hero dressed like absolute tourists, aloha shirts and board shorts and floral sundresses and all, oohing and ahhing while a travel agent shows them around their accommodations. Looking at each other and just giggling in uncertain anticipation because wow, when was the last time they had a whole week to themselves??

Deciding after a bit of tittering about that hey, it's getting dark, how about we break out the wine and watch the sunset to kick this vacation off? And the alcohol does wonders in loosening them up; by the time they go back inside, they're still (mostly) sober but pleasantly carefree. There's a gramophone and a stack of records tucked into one corner of the living room, and Mario puts one on at random, then the next thing Peach hears is staticky light jazz and "Dance with me, amore!" And already this is like the best night ever, because usually she's the one having to cajole Mario into a dance.

Two slightly tipsy dorks in love dancing aimlessly (and a bit clumsily, if we're being honest) around a spacious beach house, laughter fading into sighs, twirling dying down into swaying, adoring gazes giving way to soft, slow, meaningful kisses. Some hours later, they're curled up together with the windows open and a sea breeze cooling their bodies, drunk on bliss and maybe even a little dumbfounded, because wow, this is real. This is real. And somehow, reality feels so much nicer than either of them could have ever dreamed.