#xfwritingchalgne

[greekowl87]

Fic: Resentment

Author’s Note: writtern for @leiascully resentment fic challenge. Hooray wine!

i. 1993

He resented the fact they forced a new partner on him.

He remembered his stint in VCU and under Bill Patterson. Partners did not suit him well. He was a loner and made every single attempt to appear as so to anyone who may or may not try to entangle themselves into his tragic life. He did not want a partner. But he got one.

But the moment she walked into that basement office…wow.

He won’t openly admit it. To do so would assume that they won on some level. She was just too…green. She argued with him whenever she could…Agent Scully and her science. While he resented her, her science, and why she was sent down into this abysmal hell hole of an office, he secretly rejoiced to have someone in search of the Truth.

ii. 1994

She should resent him. For everything.

Scully sighed heavily as she shifted restlessly in her hospital bed. How did she get here? What had happened? It bothered her. She did not know. It scared her. Fear of the unknown. It was funny. That was why she was on the X-Files. To discover and investigate the unknown. But she was scared with what had happened to her. She should resent her new partner. But she couldn’t. Not after he showed up with that stupid VHS tape.

iii. 1995

She shot me, he thought numbly.

He blinked, trying to clear his eyes from the pain and drugged induced his. He resented her for shooting him. Who the hell would shoot their partner?

But, she was a great shot. The best shot in the Bureau.

He winced and gasped for air as she applied pressure to the new gunshot wound.

“Ssshhh,” she whispered, caressing his cheek.

“You shot me.”

“If I wanted to kill you, you would’ve already been dead,” she said, taking care of him. “Stay still.”

“Scully.”

“Hm.” She was distracted by his bleeding shoulder.

“I don’t resent this.”

iv. 1997 pt. 1

Cancer. Fucking cancer.

She sighed and hung her own x-ray up onto the lightbox to see exactly what she was up against. What was the cancer again? She couldn’t remember. All that she could remember is that is was rare and normally affected Asians who smoked cigarettes. But look at her. She took a piece of metal out of her neck and she was dying.

Did she resent the risks? Yes. Did she resent him? No.

v. 1997 pt. 2

She resents me. She hates me.

Mulder bent down in the dark of the hospital room, trying to silence his sobs.

I’m sorry, he wanted to say.

But all he could do was sob, grasping her hand lightly. She was so small. Tinier than normal. The cancer had ravaged her body. Feeling guilty, he crawled into the the small hospital bed and swallowed her small form.

“Mulder?”

“Ssshhh,” he whispered, kissing her brow.

“I regret nothing,” she breathed, relaxing against him. “I resent nothing.”

vi. 1998

Resentment. Her brother resented him. Her mother, obviously too kind to say anything, resented him. The FBI resented him. But she didn’t. His quest had become his. Her quest to find out who and why had done this to her had become his. It consumed them both. Did she resent him? No. If anything, she felt herself growing more trusting of him and him alone.

vii. 1999

How did she not resent me, he thought, or does she?

Mulder nuzzled her naked shoulder blade and sighed happily. His hands traversed her nude body, like an explorer marking his territory. So much had been taken from both of them. But they had each other. How did she do it?

viii. 2000

I hate you, Mulder. I resent everything. I hate everything. You took everything.

She rubbed her swollen belly absently as she wandered her cold Georgetown apartment in search of ice cream at three a.m. He was supposed to be here. That was always the plan. He was always supposed to be there, with her. Now it was just her and their unborn son.

Why did you abandon us, Mulder?

viiii. 2001

Do I resent all the lousy curve balls I have been thrown in my life for this moment? No. Hell fucking no. I have all that I ever wanted. I have my son, I have Scully. I am loved and I love the two most important people in the world. Do I resent what I had to go throughout to get there? Hell no.

x. 2002 pt. 1

Do I resent giving him up? Of course, I do. He was my miracle. Our miracle. But I had to give him up, Mulder. Don’t you understand that? I couldn’t keep him safe. I couldn’t do it alone. Do I resent giving him up? Yes. Oh god, yes. If I realized we were on the run…together…we could have taken care of him and kept him safe. Together. As a family. Do I resent my choice? Hell yes. Do I resent us? No.

xi. 2002 pt. 2

I’ll never resent you, Scully. Never. We’re on the run together. You gave up everything. For me. You gave up your life and freedom. For me. You gave up our son to keep him safe. Do I resent you? Never. Never doubt that. I’ll always love you.