#wuuuuu rubs my eyes. do i want to keep writing or do i want to go pet my dog. might pet my dog n see how i feel

[dnangelic]

it's not exactly a singular passage within leroux's novel so i can't really post it but occasionally my thoughts will drift over to the way that erik basically traps and confines christine to live and exist only within the opera house with him (alongside its underground allusions to hell/erik being death itself and both a life-draining yet divinely inspiring spiritual influence) is also what inevitably happens to daisuke thanks to dark. don't get me wrong; daisuke obviously isn't 1:1 christine. dark isn't ANYWHERE on the same level of insane as erik, and daisuke does want dark, dark is infinitely precious to him. he'll always reach out for dark if they're ever separated, he doesn't want to leave dark behind. but, that doesn't solve the issue of BOTH of their retained thematics of social isolation, the struggle of an outcast, a loser, and solo performer who doesn't feel the need to ever explain himself.

healthily, this is their independence, the fallen angel's will and rebellion showing: they're allowed to do as they like because nobody can dictate them; heaven and worldly order is defied. unhealthily, they're stuck constantly trying to solve problems that are beyond them all by themselves; heaven and worldly order are both too great for them to truly change or conquer. also, because dark takes hold of daisuke's entire life, many other opportunities also end up lost to him. it's not readily easy or plausible for daisuke to ever be anything but truly a phantom thief, and to exist (strangely, given their chaotic good personalities,) within the realm and boundaries of criminals, if not his own isolated territories; the niwa family and its household of overall misfits.

either way, no matter what, daisuke is always going to have to lie to others, for the rest of his life. like christine showing raoul her 'country' of the opera house and its various fake sceneries or the two of them playing pretend as a couple while erik watches over them both, daisuke can never escape the 'stage' that is being dark and a phantom thief. he's trapped in the opera house; he has to suffer being stolen and isolated by dark's shadow and persona just as much as being dark gives him (hey, even literal) wings to dream, be inspired by, and to fly with.

good to note that daisuke at least has a very good support system available to him in his family and that dark himself would also do just about anything for daisuke, but daisuke himself doesn't always open up to it, be it out of stubbornness, his strong desire to be independent (and thereby useful without relying on dark, who, again, actually does want to be called upon and relied on asap,) or just the sheer discomfort and worry bringing anything up generates in comparison to lying and attempting to brush things away. things aren't hopeless for him, and they never are, but there are moments where dark's loneliness; the curse of an inhuman monster, an outcast exiled from its origins, a wounded black sheep and betrayed lucifer figure, inevitably become daisuke's. dark is also deeply aware of this; he can admit it, to taking daisuke's entire life away, but he doesn't enjoy it.