#wtf is YEAR 11 bitch it's grade 11
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openheart12 · 2 years ago
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Replay
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A/N: used this generator to create texts, but just some lighthearted fluff
Summary: Texts between the FBI besties.
WC: 1,160
Warning: swearing
Power Rangers
6:12 am
Stuart: good morning
Tiffany: good morning
Jubal: good morning
Maggie: you all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit
OA: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS
Maggie: not that much. it’s 6 in the fucking morning
5:38 pm
Tiffany: my god, would you two just get a room already?
OA: excuse me?
Tiffany: you both keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else’s misery. so seriously, when’s the wedding?
Maggie: there is no wedding, we’re just besties
Stuart: I SHIP IT
Jubal: can you all not???
7:14 am
Stuart: how would you like your pancakes?
OA: plain
Tiffany: with sprinkles 
Jubal: chocolate chips
Maggie: potatoes 
OA: wtf maggie
Maggie: what? they’re good
5:39 pm
Jubal: what does rainbows mean to you?
Maggie: gay rights
Tiffany: there’s money
Stuart: the sign of god’s promise to never destroy the whole earth with a flood
OA: it is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops
12:21 am
Jubal: what’s the worst thing you guys have done?
Tiffany: rickrolled my teacher in 4th grade
OA: i kicked stuart in the shin 
Stuart: so i kicked OA between the legs
Maggie: i burned a town down
Jubal: what?
Stuart: what the hell is wrong with you?!?!?
Maggie: a lot of things
OA: no shit
F is for Friends who do Stuff Together
3:13 pm
OA: my life is a little too much panic and not enough disco
Jubal: my life is a little too much fall and not enough boy
Maggie: my life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance
Stuart: my life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons
10:04 am
Maggie: my stomach growled super loud in french 
Maggie: i’d like to clarify, my stomach did not speak in french, it growled during french class
Jubal: bonjour 
Stuart: le growl
OA: hon hon hon, feed me a baguette
4:58 am
Stuart: what is love?
Jubal: an emotional minefield 
OA: a neurochemical reaction 
Maggie: baby don’t hurt me
4:24 pm
Juba: LOWERCASE LETTERS ARE FOR THE LOWER CLASS
OA: and here we have a capitalist 
Stuart: did you just-
Maggie; let us all take a moment to appreciate that all of human history, human language, and the universe itself aligned to make this joke possible
5:28 pm
Jubal: i still don’t have a new years resolution 
OA: you could lose a few
Stuart: you could be less lazy
Maggie: don’t be such a bitch
Jubal: okay DAMN SHIT
Federal Besties of Investigation
4:38 pm
Maggie: either buckle down and do your work or you’ll end up at mcdonalds 
OA: we’re going to mcdonalds if i don’t do my work?
Maggie: no
OA: and what do i get out of this?
Maggie: a dollar
OA: what do you think i am? a chump? i would never do it for a dollar
Maggie: 2 dollars?
OA: you got yourself a deal
11:11 pm
OA: O
Maggie: what?
OA: don’t read into that
Maggie: but i will read into that
OA: HOW??? IT’S A LETTER
Maggie: why is there a space after it, hmmmmmm????
OA: dude, really? it’s a fucking letter
Maggie: it could stand for something
OA: IT DOESN’T I PROMISE
Maggie: like oppression or worse…
OA: i just typed the letter O, it means nothing :/
Maggie: optometrist 
OA: omg
8:29 am
Maggie: as usual, maggie has to save the day
OA: as usual, OA has to hear about it
7:02 pm
Maggie: treat spiders the way you want to be treated
OA: killed without hesitation 
2:42 am
Maggie: strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry or milk
OA: go the fuck to sleep maggie
Maggie: you’re an asshole, man
OA: you are what you eat maggie
Maggie: i don’t think i can handle any more of your tomfuckery 
OA: oh yeah? well i can keep going until you’re all tomfuckered out
12:48 pm
OA: remember what i told you
Maggie: don’t be a cunt
5:18 pm
OA: between tiffany, stuart, jubal, and isobel – if you had to – who would you punch?
Maggie: no one, they’re my friends. i wouldn’t punch any of them
OA: jubal?
Maggie: yeah but i don’t know why
1:17 am
Maggie: OA, i screwed up big time
OA: given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific
Avengers Dupe
5:27 am
Isobel: well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear motives and good hearts! let me guess, you’re out to save the world
OA: well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment
Jubal: more or less, i guess
Maggie: that sounds awesome. let’s do that
Stuart: i’m new here, but i am open to the concept
Tiffany: i thought that’s what we were doing
9:40 am
Isobel: if you got arrested, what would be the charges?
OA: theft
Jubal: disturbing the peace
Tiffany: aggravated assault
Stuart: arson 
Maggie: all of the above, probably in that order
7:25 pm
Stuart: rules were made to be broken
Jubal: they were made to be followed, nothing is made to be broken
OA: piñatas
Maggie: glow sticks
Tiffany: karate boards
Isobel: spaghetti when you have a small pot
Stuart: rules
Jubal: …
10:51 pm
OA: fine, judge me all you want but stuart married a lesbian, isobel left a man at the altar, maggie fell in love with a gay ice dancer, tiffany threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, and jubal lives in a box
Maggie: damn way to air out all of our dirty laundry 
2:58 pm
Stuart: imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life
Isobel: it would be nice to have my sense of purpose back…
OA: oh wow, you found my childhood innocence! thank you for finding it
Tiffany: my will to live! i haven’t seen this in years
Maggie: i knew i lost that potential somewhere 
Jubal: mental stability, my old friend
Stuart: jesus, could you guys lighten up a little
4:48 am
Isobel: who else is hiding in the laundry room trying to listen to jubal and stuart’s convo?
OA: me, i’m in the laundry basket 
Tiffany: i’m in the washing machine
Maggie: i’m in the closet
OA: we accept you maggie <3
Maggie: no, i’m literally in the closet 
OA: love is love <3
Tiffany: ALLY
8:37 am
Maggie: you guys don’t wanna mess with me
OA: yeah, maggie will straight up cry in public. don’t try her
Maggie: exactly, i will straight up…
Maggie: why would you say that? :( 
Jubal: great, now she’s crying in the middle of the JOC 
4:39 pm
OA: i’d die for you guys
Stuart: then perish
Tiffany: you will
Jubal: please don’t
Isobel: cool
Maggie: i’d die for you first
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realmadridx14 · 5 years ago
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Bro i try SO hard to not use british words and spelling but 9 years of british school really did its work on me 😔😔😔😔
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deantransgressions2 · 4 years ago
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8x23 sacrifice
#1: “which pretty much means that you’re our bitch” (said to crowley)
time tag: 10:41
#2: sam: “i have no clue what to say now” (about confession) 
dean: “well, i mean, i could give you suggestions if you want.” 
sam: “o-okay. yeah. sure.”
dean: “all right. well, i’m just spitballing here, but if i were you, uh...ruby, killing lilith, letting lucifer out, losing your soul, not looking for me when i went to purgatory, for starters.”
sam: “thanks.” 
why did dean offer to give sam suggestions? what possessed him to think sam would ever wanted him to?
time tag: 13:54
#3: dean: “or, hey, h-how about what you did to penny markle in the 6th grade? why don’t you lead with that?”
sam: “well, that was you” 
ok. remember how i said in the s5 episodes how dean always shifts blame onto other people, so he doesn’t have to deal with his own guilt? yeah, here’s an extreme case of that. also, wtf did he do to penny?
time tag: 15:00
#4: “now, if anyone needs a chaperone while doing the heavy lifting, it’s sam.” 
what did he say in the last episode? what. did. he. say. ill tell you :) 
“over the past couple of months, i’ve seen him do crap that i didn’t even think was possible...there’s not a doubt in my mind that he’s gonna cross that finish line. not one.”
so what is the truth? who fucking knows.
time tag: 18:03
#5: tells sam that if he is not back in 8 hours, to finish the trials. very odd behavior. why does sam have to wait around for dean? if sam wants to cure a demon before lunch, then hurray! bc it’s his own decision, not deans.
time tag: 18:15
#6: tells kevin, who is clearly exhausted and mentally drained, to “translate. that’s what you do”. as if kevin is their slave and not an 19 year old kid. 
time tag: 19:51
#7: “you did a lot of damage up there, man.” (said to cas, for no reason)
time tag: 23:01
#8: dean having an existential crisis at the realization that gay people are real. 
time tag:  24:18
#9: tried, and succeeded to get sam to stop the trials. dean has been saying all season how sam isn’t strong enough to complete the trials. how he can’t be trusted. but in the end, it’s dean who can’t complete the trials, huh?
time tag: 35:40
-----------okay i’m gonna pick apart the speech bit by bit and make each section a different transgression because there is a lot wrong with it, all for various reasons. ------------
#10: sam: “so?” and dean is shocked as if he isn’t the #1 person responsible for making sam feel this way...
time tag: 35:57
#11: “think about what we know, huh? pulling souls from hell, curing demons, hell, ganking a hellhound” he never does any of these three things ever again after this. 
time tag: 37:28
#12: sam: “you can barely do it with me. i mean, you think i screw up everything i try. you think i need a chaperone, remember?”
dean: “come on, man. that’s not what i meant.”
sam: “no, it’s exactly what you meant. you wanna know what i confessed in there? what my greatest sin was? it was how many times i let you down. i can’t do that again.”
dean: “sam-”
sam: “what happens when you’ve decided i can’t be trusted again? i mean, who are you going to turn to next time instead of me? another angel, another..another vampire? do you have any idea what it feels like to watch your own brother just...” 
all the reasons why sam wants to kill himself, dean put in his head. look back at 8x01 and see how happy sam was. how healthy he was. now watch this. 
time tag: 37:35
#13: “hold on! hold on! you seriously think that?” uh yeah. you literally told him this not 8 hours ago....
time tag: 38:23 (use this time tag for all below)
#14: “because none of it..none of it is true.” so why does he say it? all the time?
time tag: ^
#15: “look, i know we’ve had our disagreements, okay? hell, i know i’ve said some junk that set you back on your heels” odd way to say suicidal
time tag: ^
#16: “but, sammy....come on. i killed benny to save you. i’m willing to let this bastard and all the sons of bitches that killed mom walk because of you. don’t you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that i would put in front of you. it has never been like that, ever! i need you to see that. i’m begging you!.” 
hey, do you guys remember when dean was gonna let sam die alone just because he had an addiction? haha yeah. good times....amnesia is my only explanation for this. 
time tag: ^
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moons-and-stars-and-shit · 4 years ago
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Hii! May i ask for a slice of cake? (If you can ofc)
So im a INFP-T virgo im also 4"11 i have dark brown hair it because wayy lighter near the sun. Also dark brown eyes my hair is cut kinda like a shag like the front is cut but the back isn't (bc of my parents) my style is grunge ig? Im very inlove with fairy style Smm but because im broke i cant really fulfil my love for that style (also probably because of my parents). My body is???? Okay my boobies are medium size and no unfortunately I don't have a fat ass 😕 im not chubby but at the same time im not skinny. Like the most fat goes to my tummy I get rolls when I sit down bath blah you get my point (im pretty insecure about it lolol). One of my two main dreams is to study abroad and become an interior decorator.
I dont know how to describe my personality but I will try. My best friend always tells me that my sense of humour is downhill BAD. I would laugh at the dumbest shit ever for example i laughed one of those pixilated bugs pics with random names on the bottom 💀 also I laugh at my own trauma and stuff that shouldn't be laughed at. I kinda have anger issues 😕 I get unmotivated pretty easily. I rant to my best friend alot and she says that im ✨depressed✨ and have ✨anxiety✨ and that i need therapy. Im scared to rant to my parents because im "too young and its just my hormones". Something that I found out about myself this year is i have chill tics 😦 (from anxiety). Outside im nice and sweet but on the inside my mind is just saying other things. Im SOMETIMES cold and say what's on my mind but thats to my close ones like my mom dad or friends. I dont lie going Outside alot I think school is kinda useless. I like to draw and listen to music my fav artist are mother mother and mitski.
I hope i didn't say TOO much anyway thank youu I hope you have/had a great day :)
🍰 for @shotosimp2
Romantic Matchup
Oikawa Tooru
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How yall met
Ok im ngl
Y'all had know clue who each other were
Well that's a lie
Of course you knew who Oikawa was
But you just didn't care
Now Oikawa always saw you around school
You know...in the school uniform
But one day
He saw you outside of school in all of your grunge glory
And apart of him was like bitch wtf
And the other was like ok queen i see you 😗
So he approached you and complimented your outfit
And you said thanks and then ran off to wherever you were heading
Wait
You just said thanks???
No fan girling????
Not even a blush??????
Nothing????????????
OIKAWA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING
Ok he would understand that reaction if you were just a stranger on the street
But you went to school with him?
So you had to know who he was right?
Yeah my mans had a whole ass crisis because you didn't have a bigger reaction
The next day he went to Iwa and told him about his interaction with you
And he was just like not everyone was to like you ya know
Oikawa: >:o
Then Iwa had a brilliant idea
Get this
Maybe
Oikawa should BEFRIEND you before expecting you to want to talk to him
Wild theory I know
So now Oikawa had a new goal
Befriending you
It actually wasn't that hard since you both had a lot of classes together
Soon enough you guys became close friends
And oikawa was happy with just being your friend
At least...he thought he was
But everything changed when you told him you were going to study abroad for 3 months
And even though you had each others numbers
Everything without you just seemed so dull
Omg
Did he really have feelings for you?
The more time that passed by the more he was sure that he liked you
Like LIKED liked you
So the day you came back to Japan is when he confessed to you
And well you'd be lying if you said you hadn't caught feelings for him too
So you said yes
What they love about you
He loves how normal you treat him
Now hell admit when he first met you he kinda wanted you to treat him like a celebrity
Expected it even
But the more time he spent around you
The more he realized how much he liked being treated normally
Ok screw what your friend says
He loves your humor!
Yall will laugh at the dumbest shit
If we were to look at you and Oikawa's messages
85% of it would be dumb ass memes
And honestly
This boy makes jokes about his trauma too
“Hey Y/N you wanna hear a joke?”
“Sure”
“My existence”
“...”
“...”
“Ayyyyy”
“Ayyyyy”
He loves how easy it is to talk to you
Like he's told you things he hasn't even told Iwa before
And Iwa is his CHILDHOOD BESTIE
So yeah
Trust between you two
ASTRONOMICAL
What you love about them
You love how supportive he is
If you say you wanna do something
He is right behind you cheering you on
You could tell him you want to commit arson
And he'd just be like
Period queen ill bring the gasoline 💅
You can always count on this man to be in your corner
Speaking of
You can always count on oikawa period
Which is another thing that you love about him
If oikawa is anything
He is a man of his word
If he says hes gonna do something
You know he's gonna do it
He's just overall a really reliable person
You love how he just seems to motivate you to do better
Fr after you guys started dating your grades went
Partly because you felt like you needed to compete with him
But mostly because he just motivates and pushes you to do better
And if you do improve on something
He is HYPING you up
“That's my baby! I knew you could do it!”
Favorite things to do together
Yall love to just go to the store and window shop
Im sorry but yall are some broke hoes
So most of the time it's just you guys trying on clothes in the dressing room
Taking pictures of your outfits
Then leaving
Yeah the store employees kinda hate you…
But who cares what they think
And if you two do have some pocket cash you'll buy one or two things
Then blow the rest of your money on that good mall food
Cause why not
Random Hc
He makes fun of your guys height difference ALL THE TIME
But like, can you blame him????
You're not even 5 feet tall!!!
“Imagine being the size of a 10 year old, couldn't be me”
Imagine being taller than the national average height 😐, couldn't be me”
“Touche”
He let you dress him up as an E-Boy ONCE
Ngl tho he dug the eyeliner look 😗
He called you every day while you were studying abroad
He even sent you a oikawa plushie
You may or may not have sent him a video of you drowning it
When you came back to Japan he legit TACKLED you in the middle of the airport
Astrology
Virgo + Cancer
Compatibility 80%
Cancer and Virgo can have a wonderful connection and are usually brought together by sexual understanding.
The main problem of their relationship is in the possible conflict between emotional Cancer and reasonable Virgo.
If they manage to overcome this, accepting each other’s shortcomings and learning to incorporate some rationality or some emotion into their lives, they could end up in an inspiring relationship that will last for a very long time.
In a way, they complement each other as much as the heart complements the mind.
If they share a spark of love, it would be a shame to miss the opportunity for happiness just because of someone’s irrational expectations or someone’s closed heart.
If someone can help Virgo build their trust, it is their Cancer partner.
Although Cancer is a cardinal sign, they are stable by nature, especially when it comes to emotional decisions they have made.
If they have chosen Virgo to be their loving partner, they will have no reason to lie or cheat.
This behavior would only endanger their vision of a shared life and a loving family they want with the partner they chose.
This is also a reason why Cancer won’t have an initial problem with trusting Virgo.
Their convictions are stronger than their doubt.
Overall Aesthetic
Grunge Glamour ✨
Songs -
Tia tamera (Doja Cat)
Verbratem (mother mother
Literal Legend (Ayesha Erotica)
Hayloft (mother mother)
Stupid (ashnikko)
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milks-writings · 5 years ago
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Yeahhh!!!, okay can I request a Aone, Kyoutani x female reader. How there friendship started and how they was scared to confess to (y/n) because they thought they had scared her away because they was having a bad day on top of trying to confess to her. Years later they have a baby.🥺🥺🥺Something cute like that❤. Thanks, hope it makes sense 🤷🏽‍♀️
✿.。.:*☆.:*:.☆*.:。.✿.。.:*☆.:*:.☆*.:。.✿.
☆*.:。.✿ 𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘: Takanobu Aone x Fem!Reader;  Kentarō Kyōtani x Fem!Reader
☆*.:。.✿ 𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: swearing but I swear one day imma stop
☆*.:。.✿ 𝕒/𝕟: OMG YASSS I LOVE THIS,,, and sorry for making you wait so long honey🥺💕
☆*.:。.✿ 𝕞𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥
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☆*.:。.✿ Headcanons: Aone and Kyōtani from friends to lovers (+child bonus):
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AONE:
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ How did your friendship start?
So you arranged a study group with a few other guys from the Volleyball team and aone was there too!
AND YOU WERE LIKE AJSDF AONE WHOOO???
Honestly, you knew who he was you were just scared to talk to him rip
I mean have y’all seen him? ScarYY
So while studying with the other Aone came up to you to ask you something aND HE WAS SO NICE ACTUALLY???
Like he bowed n shit and suddenly you weren’t scared at all
He do be softie af so you decided to exchange numbers in case he had questions to any topics!
He helped you a lot too for studying and also for many tests and over the time you just started to meet up alone, to study aojsdfx
But after a while, you would stop studying and would just talk to each other about anything and that’s how your friendship started
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ Him trying to confess
We all know that Aone is baby and honestly,,, he would be so scared to confess to you :(
Like you were already having a bad day since you got two bad grades on your tests and on top of that your teacher got mad at you since you forgot your homework that day
AND HE DIDN’T KNOW YOU HAD A BAD DAY
So after seeing you just going out of his way he was like fCk did I scare her? :((
Tbh he wanted to confess this day since he got mentally prepared the whole week for that but YOU ARE SO PISSED
“Hey Y/N” “What?” the way you spat out the what made him freeze on the spot and he immediately turned around and was like NVM
“Now tell me aone, what is wrong?” you asked a little annoyed, tilting your head
N HE WAS LIKE NOW OR NEVER
“I really like you” wHat???
“Uh, sorry, I didn’t understand you, what?”
“I really like you!” And he turned around again to face you, HIS FACE BEET RED OMG
“Oh” you were so surprised LIKE YOUR CRUSH LIKES YOU BACK AHHH
“I- uh- I like you too” whaAA
He is not okay
His heart stopped beating tbh and then it started to race
YOU LIKED HIM BACK AOJSDF
rip him and his soul
“uh, eh,, ugh,,, I- what??”
DID I STUTTER???
“I like you too” WHAAAOSDJFOSJFD
He tries to stay caLm but uGh
“I uhm,,, thanks,,, I guess,,,,,”
bitch wh0t why did you say thanks???
n E WAY THAT’S HOW YOU TWO STARTED DATING <33
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ Having a child with him:
Soft hours: open
I AM NOT KIDDINGA OSDFJ
He is just,,, so soft for your kid :((
After you told him about the kid he was like wh0t we will get a chILD?
I WILL BE A DAD???
EHHHH
10/10 he would tear up out of happiness and would tell EVERYONE OH MY GOD-
You are lowkey embarrassed but high-key happy too
THE BEST DAD LAJDSOF
He can scare everyone away if they are mean to your kid with only a glare and he will treat your kid like a god/ness
Everyone wants a dad like him lets be honest
He is pretty funny too idk how he does that,,,
Also has a mf dad instinct
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KYŌTANI:
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ How did your friendship start?
Ehh so you were friends with Oinkawa tofu Oikawa Tooru and he invited you over to one of his games n you were like,,, ok???
You low-key prayed to not get killed by his fangirls tbh
N E WAY
So on his game, there was this hOT GUY AND I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT IWAIZUMI
It was Kyoutani ugh
Let’s be honest we all have a crush on him whenever we want to or not
N AFTER THE GAME YOU JUST ASKED HIM FOR HIS NUMBER BECAUSE WHY NOT
Baby got so shy but also tsundere and he was like,,, maybe,,,,,
In the end, he gave it anyway ugh
So you started to text him v often and visit him by his games <33
11/10 you had a crush on him before he crushed on you
And thanks to Oinkawa Tofu you guys started to get even closer and closer since Trashykawa wanted to set you guys up!!
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ Him trying to confess
He would just straight up tell you
OR AT LEAST HE PLANNED TO DO THAT
But after you had to walk through the rain only to know that your first class wouldn’t take part since the teacher was sick and you had to wait alone in the cold your day was d o n e
So after he tried to talk to you he was sO shy
He tried to talk to you but you snapping on him got him anNOYED TOO
and I have the feeling that whenever he is mad he is even blunter and would not think about his words
So he just straight up spat out “I wanted to tell you that I like you but according to your snapping you don’t like me back” TSUNDERE AF
“I am sorry, what?” “Nothing” and he HAD THE AUDACITY TO HUFF OASDOIFJ
N e way it kinda ended up as a small fight
BUT YOU ENDED UP YELLING “I have liked you since the day we met” so rip you and your whole existence
So that’s how you confessed oasjdf
• ₊°✧˗ ♡ Having a child with him:
He is even tsundere to his kid's wtf
So not like that he didn’t like your kids or wouldn’t treat them right just whenever someone asks him something about your kids he is like ‘None of your business’ and uGh
He is a sweetheart to your kids and raises them so well!!
No one would want him as a father but that’s only because they do not know him :(
Your kid is so happy to have him and you are of course too!! <3
Once he found out about being a dad he cried ok
He was so happy but told almost no one aohsdf
I mean it is not their business
Oinkawa Tofu is their uncle
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«𝐛𝐲 𝐄𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞»
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☆*.:。.✿ 𝕃𝕠𝕪𝕒𝕝 𝕡𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕤: @yams046 @shouyouwrites @sugawsites @kara-grayson04 (send an ask to be tagged in the gen. Taglist! <3)
☆*.:。.✿ 𝔹𝕖𝕤𝕥 𝕔𝕙𝕖𝕖𝕤𝕖𝕔𝕦𝕝𝕥 𝕡𝕖𝕖𝕡𝕤:
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sunflowrhaz · 4 years ago
Text
I was tagged by @theleavesoflorien​ to answer a few questions that dig a little deeper. thank you darling!! (this is literally months old oops) 💛
1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or a blue pen?
both really, i don’t have a preference
2. Would you prefer to live in the country or in the city?
country! i hate cities so much! i grew up visiting my grandparents farm all the time growing up! although instead of the country preferably a seaside town such as the one i live in. it’s not too busy but not far away from everything.. plus i couldn’t part from the sea! 
3. If you could learn a new skill, what would it be?
picking back up painting, continue learning norwegian (don’t look at me like that marianne i keep saying i’m learning it but i’ve been so slack asdfdsasdf), get back into marimba
4. do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar?
tea with sugar is so gross! i only drink herbal teas. my favourite is spearmint
5. What was your favourite book as a child?
the harry potter series!! and the rainbow magic books asdfgfdsa, the princess diaries series, anything roald dahl, anything dr suess, captain underpants lol, hairy maclary, mr mcgee and the biting flea asdfdsadf soo many i was such a loner as a child and literally read every single book i could find
6. Do you prefer baths or showers?
showersss
7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be?
a mermaid so i can live my h2o fantasy adfasdfds or a dragon 🐉
8. Paper or electronic books?
paper always! i love the smell and i would love to have a giant bookshelf filled with books one day! i read on my phone for fics of when i get a free ebook but my right eye is so blind it’s like bitch no stop please lmaoo
9. What is your favourite item of clothing?
all my flowy boho cotton blouses and pants! and my fave blue jeans and grungy tshirts
10. Do you like your name? Would you like to change it?
i used to wish it was a little more unique like shortening it to ren/wren instead of lauren because i had 4 other lauren’s in my grade at school 😂i was literally friends with two lauren’s asdfgfdsa
but in the end i do love my nicknames lozz,lozzy, lozza so it’s not so bad!
11. Who is a mentor to you?
my mother and my grandfather! my grandfather is my biggest inspiration 💛seeing all that he has achieved and his views and mentality on life.
12. Would you like to be famous? If so, what for?
nooo thanks. the only famous i would want to be is for activism/humanitarian/environmentalist stuff but even then i wouldn’t want to be super famous and known?
13. Are you a restless sleeper?
nope! once i’m out i am out! i love my sleep and do everything i can to ensure i get the best sleep ever! now if you’ll excuse me i’m off to listen to harry’s calm meditation 😂
15. Which element best represents you?
fire and air
16. Who do you want to be closer to?
my brother! i feel like i don’t see him as often anymore what with his work and living in seperate houses. he is my best friend so i miss just always having him near me all the time.
17. Do you miss someone at the moment?
no one so much as just not seeing my family as often even though i do see them every week. i just want a big family holiday to spend time with them. and i’m missing some of my mutals atm who are busy lately 😞
18. Tell us about an early childhood memory.
i blocked out so much of my childhood eeep ummm probably visiting my grandparents farm, riding horses, my grandfather driving us around on a trailer on the back of a tractor, collecting cicada skins with my brother and starting a collection of cool bugs, stealing berries off the mulberry bush ahaha, finding snake skins (why did we like collecting skins wtf asdfd) 
19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten?
snails? crocodile? i don’t even know ahaha (snails are amazing btw yummm i used to eat them all the time in vanuatu growing up)
20. What are you most thankful for?
my family, my health, the beautiful country i live in, the friends i have made on here 💛so many things
21. Do you like spicy food?
yummmmmm yes! just not super duper spicy i can’t handle that asdfgfsa
22. Have you ever met someone famous?
no i don’t think so? wait patty walters from as it is i got a pic and a hug from him <3 other than that no i don’t think so i mean i’m in the middle of nowhere asdfdsa woohoo australia
23. Do you keep a diary or journal?
i kept a super embarrassing diary at 12 but apart from that nope! like seriously that diary haunts me i don’t know what happened to it please for the love of god i hope it got thrown in the trash asdfdsa the CRINGE 
24. Do you prefer to use pen or pencil?
pen! 
25. What is your star sign?
sagittarius sun, capricorn moon, libra rising 
26. Do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy?
CRUNCHY! wtf who is eating soggy cereal you are seriously disturbed asdfgfdsa
27. What would you want your legacy to be?
this is so tough ummm just bettering humanity and the environment idek 
28. Do you like reading? What was the last book you read?
yes!! i was the loner kid in school who sat in the library at lunch reading all the books asdfgfdsa. the last book i read was the raven king by maggie stiefvater because LIBBY got me totally obsessed with this series god dammit what have you done to me and i am currently reading call down the hawk which is a sequel to the raven king (dammit libby asdfdsdfdsa)
29. How do you show someone you love them?
i always seem to cater to them with acts of service? so like cooking for them etc.. just doing stuff for them and looking after them in general? idk how to describe it. also sweet little messages and notes and cuddles! oh BOY will i tell you how much i love you in a birthday card or message asdsa like i will bring a tear to your eye baby just made my grandpa cry with his bday card asdfdsa
30. Do you like ice in your drinks?
crushed ice mmmmmm
31. What are you afraid of?
losing my family, never travelling, being stuck/tied down
32. What is your favourite scent?
the ocean, rain, books, sea breeze, wet grass, coffee, lavender, clean sheets, spearmint
33. Do you address older people by their name or surname?
mostly their name? i mean i feel like where i live in australia it’s pretty chill and not so formal? i even call my grandparents by their first names adfgfdsa mainly because my grandma did NOT want to be called grandma 
34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life?
OH BOY! i would be travelling non stop! i would literally never come home, i would be travelling around the world, living overseas etc... literally i would just be living on a boat sailing around greece or wherever. omg how i would love to do that :(
35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean?
it depends. i would say the ocean (i love her so much) but also i was a swimmer for over 10 years so i love the pool too. i love sitting on the bottom of the pool, it’s so calming
36. What would you do if you found $50 on the ground
keep it but if i knew whose it was i would return it
37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? Did you make a wish?
no :( hopefully one day
38. What is one thing you would want to teach your children?
i’m not having children
39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it?
maybe a quote/word or something on the back of my arm above my elbow idek i have an entire tattoo board on pinterst asdfdsa even though i know i would never get one i am too indecisive  
40. What can you hear right now?
 i’m listening to a pop punk playlist on spotify
41. Where do you feel the safest?
at home with my family
42. What is one thing you want to overcome/conquer?
my procrastination habits omg i am the worst!! certain family relations
43. If you could travel back to any era, what would it be?
dinosaurs mate, straight up, jks jks... no but really dinosaurs would be soo cool though, or maybe ancient greece?
44. What is your most used emoji?
💛✨😂
45. Describe yourself using one word.
more than one came to mind so giddy, optimistic, cheerful
46. What do you regret the most?
not travelling heaps after school ( i mean i was broke but still i should have worked more *sigh*) travelling looks really bleak now thanks to covid :(, losing touch with 3 certain people from high school i suck at staying in touch with people i am such an introvert 😞
47. Last movie you saw?
enola holmes and i loved it so much!
48. Last tv show you watched?
the mandalorian
49. Invent a word and its meaning
wobmap - intense affection and wonder for nature and the world
asdfgh what even
i tag: @pridesobright @sunflower-vol14 @rnbziamau @dailylouis @boobear-harold @princessparkhl @rosegoldeyelids @echoedsparks @angelharry (it’s been a while my secret santa pal ahaha hello!) and whoever else want’s to do this please feel free to say i tagged you! :) feel free to ignore 
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doc-pickles · 5 years ago
Text
it’s nothing funny just to talk (p.2)
What happens when you text that random number graffitied on a bathroom stall in your favorite bar? Jo Wilson is about to find out. - In which Bar Princess and Doctor Evil Spawn meet via text.
Saturday 12:09 PM
you know what might be worse than pyramid schemes?
bridal showers
this is horrendous 
Same woman you were drinking in solidarity to?
obviously, I have like four friends 
I thought teachers were like outgoing and bubbly?
oh hell no, socializing is not my cup of tea
one of the other bridesmaids just asked who i was texting so I told her jack the ripper
Oh you couldn’t even give me a good one
i’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that 
My day off and the weekend finally coincide, which means I’m not leaving my couch all day. 
I wish I were you this shower is gonna kill me 
teachers on the weekend are a fun sight to see
You’re not partaking this time?
no i’m DD
it’s for the best, I did throw up on my shoes last weekend 
How crazy is a bridal shower that you need a DD?
there’s a mimosa bar and they’re already playing never have I ever
the mother of the groom is starting something with the mother of the bride
I gotta deal with this 
  Saturday 3:11 PM
I deserve bottle of wine for all of the shit I dealt with today
I never wanna be a maid of honor ever again
Maybe we should rename you Maid of Dishonor?
wooooooow
I throw up on my shoes ONE TIME
How’d the battle of the mothers go?
oh it was horrendous 
groom is from a rich family and bride grew up on a farm… you know how it goes 
Doesn’t sound fun. Glad you made it out. 
barely
how’s your day off going
Amazing. I get to watch baseball and sit on the couch with a bag of chips and a beer. I’m living the dream. 
I envy you
they’re making us go out again
Do you get to drink during this escapade?
yes thank god
manhattan or moscow mule?
A whiskey drinker? You might be the perfect woman. 
don’t try to butter me up, i’ve never even met you in person
We can change that. 
  Saturday 6:14 PM
Do you think birds have dreams?
I thought I was supposed to get drunk
You were talking too long. And I’m not drunk. 
I can’t think of another reason why you’d ask me about bird dreams
You’re a teacher. I was curios. 
i’m not a bird specialist
personally I do not think that birds can dream
I’m telling them you said that. 
the birds?
Yes. They deserve to know the truth. 
have you just been sitting on the couch drinking beer all day?
did you even eat
Yeah I had pizza for lunch 
what about dinner?
It’s not dinner time yet. 
dude it’s 6
Oh shit really?
Hahaha that explains it 
psh and you said I was bad when I was drunk
you’re freaking Snow White 
Is this ebcause I asked about the birds 
yes it is
I gotta go, Maggie says i’m not netting the quota for fun
Maggie sounds like a buzzkill
she’s the assistant principal, i’m scared she’ll fire me if I don’t listen
jk… kinda 
  Saturday 12:32 AM
Incoming Voice Call
  “Jo! Put the phone down! You should not be calling anyone right now!”
“Hello?”
“Doctor Evil Spawn! I’m so glad you picked up.”
“Are you drunk now?”
“Noooo….. maybe. I just wanted to say hi.”
“Hi princess.”
“Your voice is nice. It’s a good voice, it’s sexy and I like it.”
“You’re kinda crazy, you know that?”
“Josephine Wilson! Give me the phone!”
“Woah who full named you? They sound angry.”
“That’s Maggie, she’s trying to get me to go home. I can’t go home Maggie, I’m talking to a hot doctor! And he has a sexy voice!”
“You’ve never even seen me, you don’t know if I’m hot.”
“I’m judging off your sexy voice and what few characteristics I know about you. I’d be shocked if you weren’t hot.”
“You have too much faith in me.”
“I have to go, Maggie is dragging me out of the bar. Byeeee hot doctor!”
“Goodnight princess, don’t throw up on your shoes this time.” 
  Sunday 9:58 AM
How’re your shoes looking?
  Sunday 11:22 AM
You’re still dead? I mean you did call me half past midnight… but I thought you’d be up by now.
  Sunday 1:46 PM
Are you embarrassed because of what you said on the phone? Frankly I found it endearing. 
  Sunday 3:18 PM
As a doctor, I’m advising you to drink more fluids and get food in your system. Maybe a banana. It’ll make you feel less shitty, trust me.
  Sunday 6:17 PM
Hope you’re not dead in a ditch somewhere. 
  Monday 7:23 AM
oh my god I am so sorry
I dropped my phone in Maggie’s car and I just got it back
wait you were worried about me weren’t you
Well you fell off the face of the earth… so yeah. 
awwww well it’s nice to know that someone would notice if I was kidnapped and murdered 
Didn’t you say I was the one that would kidnap and murder you? 
yes but i’m having a change of heart
Is it because of my sexy voice?
I was kinda hoping I didn’t say that out loud
whoops
I told you I found it endearing. 
flattery will get you everywhere
gotta go, class is lining up and they’re already screaming
I’ll pray for you. 
  Monday 8:08 PM
dude the thai place on 7th across from old navy?
amazing
i’m in heaven
Oh so we’ve reached the stage of giving each other food recommendations?
obviously 
this is a serious relationship 
Chinese place across from Joe’s Bar has the best egg rolls. Perfect drunchies. 
i’ve never been to joe’s 
I live right around the corner from there
So we’re neighbors then? I’m off of Fullerton. 
I guess we are
that’s exciting, i bet i’ve seen you at the grocery store 
Bold of you to assume I make it to the grocery store. 
honestly same
I usually guilt steph or izzie into it
You’re the chaotic good of the group aren’t you?
obviously 
I keep things balanced 
what’re you doing?
On a break, almost done for the night. I have to round on post ops and then I’m done. 
nice!!! did you get anything fun today?
Not really just surgeries I could do in my sleep. 
typical monday’s
I have to go, we have a field trip tomorrow and i’m not emotionally prepared
Oof. Have fun, don’t die. 
who the hell ends texts like that?
A doctor. Obviously. Night princess. 
goodnight Snow White
  Tuesday 12:18 PM
whoever decided to bring 42 fourth graders to the science discovery museum should be fired 
Isn’t that you?
maybe
maybe not
It was totally you. How about a deal?
deal with an internet stranger? 
fine but if I die i’m gonna be pissed
How about I drop off a bottle of wine on your porch on my way to work? I work the night shift again. 
hmmmm I don’t think i’m supposed to give my address to strangers
but i’m pretty sure if you were going to kill me you would’ve done it by now
See you’re getting the hang of it. 
okay i’ll give you my address
but if there’s a bomb we’re going to have words
If there’s a bomb you’ll be dead. 
  Tuesday 4:54 PM
red wine AND egg rolls?
if I didn’t know better i’d think you’re trying to woo me
I think I need to meet you before we can say that. 
thank you!!! 
my roomies are teasing me about taking wine from a stranger
You’re welcome. And I’m not a stranger. I know your name and where you live. 
aaaaand way to make things creepy
BTW your blonde roommate was checking out my ass. 
hahahahaha that’s izzie for you
she has a boyfriend don’t worry 
I wasn’t too concerned about her, just thought you might want to beat her up or something. 
intentionally trying to start a cat fight? classy
she says you’re “super dreamy” so that’s a plus
Glad to know I passed the checkpoint. Does this mean I get to meet you now?
maybe maybe not
we have learned one good thing though
And what’s that?
even if you are a serial killer, you have a good taste in wine and your attractive
i’ll die happy
  Tuesday 7:32 AM
If I never work another overnight again it’ll be too soon. 
yeah you’ve been working a lot of those 
wtf is up with that
I lost a bet with Arizona. 
oof that doesn’t sound fun
at least I have nice stable working hours
summers off
i’m living the dream
Why do you do that?
do what?
Send forty texts. There’s a button to put in a period and start a new sentence. In the same text. 
you really do text like a 60 year old
I’m sophisticated, obviously. 
I know we’ve never met but I need a favor
Oof. After I dropped off wine for you?
the favor includes free food and alcohol
I’m listening… 
that wedding i’m in is next weekend
and I don’t have a date :-)
I wish I could, I’m going out of town. 
booooo
it’s okay, after i’m done being a brides bitch my weekend will open up
i’ll also be done with school for year
So I can take you out on a proper date? Instead of texting you all day? 
you do realize that you’re texting a girl who found your number at 11 pm while shit faced in a bar right
That’s always how I pictured meeting the woman of my dreams. 
oh shut up
I suppose i’ll go on a date with you, man I know nothing about 
I’m Alex, I’m 27 and I don’t think pineapple belongs on pizza
deal breaker sorry
pineapple + pizza = deliciousness 
Well at least you know more about me. 
that I do
jo, 25, who’s favorite color is purple and eats cinnamon toast for breakfast everyday, has to go educate the tiny humans
talk to you later old man
Oh come on you’re two years younger!
  Tuesday 1:26 PM
have you ever had to hot glue rhinestones to candle votives 
because I am
and I hate it
WTF is a votive?
those tiny little glass things you put a candle into
Oh. Why are you bedazzling them? 
wedding prep
today is a half day so bridezilla has us crafting for her 
Are all of you brides bitches teachers?
yes
it’s hell
you try to talk about your class and all you hear about is peonies and roses and baby’s breath
I’m glad I’m a dude then. 
ha! you better be 
oh my god, she’s gone psycho
if I don’t text she took my phone
Don’t die, I’m looking forward to our date. 
  Tuesday 7:17 PM
RIP Jo, Avid Cinnamon Toast Eater 
Killed by Her Insane Bride Friend  
I made it out!!!!
barely
Nice, I’ve heard a rabid bridezilla is hard to escape. 
it was the worst 
but she let me go when I told her I had to finish putting in grades for the year
(I finished last night)
I for one am proud of you. That’s badass. 
lol i’ll keep that in mind 
thursday is our last day before freedom
I think I might get shit faced as soon as I leave work
I support it wholeheartedly. 
good because you’ll probably get more bar princess texts
Or if I’m lucky a phone call where you call me sexy again. 
hey hey I didn’t call you sexy
I called your voice sexy
there’s a difference 
Oh sorry, I don’t know how I overlooked that. 
mhm sure 
tomorrow is crazy hair day 
Does this mean I get to see a picture of you? Because I’m definitely interested in seeing what you do with this spirit day thing. 
i’ll save it for when we meet
I’m determined not to see you until our date
Suit yourself. Gotta go remove stitches. 
oooohh how exhilarating!! 
  Wednesday 9:42 AM
How goes the crazy hair?
oh just dandy 
half my hair is pink 
You seem like the type to be able to pull of pink hair. Plus it’s pretty rad. 
you’re too kind 
I bribed the kids with cookies and a movie 
i’m totally winning today
I just took out an appendix, I think I win. 
just saying I don’t think that our jobs are comparable 
but taking out an appendix sounds cool
Not as cool as cookies though. 
I have a bunch left over
should I drop them on your doorstep? 
Only if you want to. I wouldn’t say no to a good cookie. I’m here till 5. 
i’ll stop by after work!! 
we have another half day
Sweet. I’m glad you’re the one that found my number. 
  Wednesday 12:56 PM
Dude. George says you look like an adorable preschooler. 
I FORGOT I HAD MY HAIR LIKE THIS
he was very understanding 
Rave reviews on your “kindness and beautiful eyes” 
oh my god 
I have to die now 
He might’ve mentioned your ass too. I’m painting a beautiful mental picture. 
oh lord
brb gotta wash out this stupid hair dye 
maybe bang my head against the shower wall
Oooh tell me more. I love a dirty shower fantasy. 
oh booo
you’re not even trying anymore 
  Wednesday 5:55 PM
remember the titans is on tv
and it’s really good 
in case you didn’t know 
That movie is 20 years old, of course I know it’s good. 
well clearly I didn’t 
i didn’t have cable growing up 
Oh neither did I, I just stole it from the neighbors. 
that’s pretty bad ass for a kid 
Had to keep my siblings entertained. You know how it is. 
nope i’m an only child
That sounds like a dream. I have two younger siblings and they’re both a pain in the ass. 
if you knew the half of it you’d be begging to trade places with me 
I’m looking forward to hearing all of it. 
  Thursday 11:53 AM
FREEDOM!!!!!!
I AM FREE!!!!
HALLELUJAH!!!!!
I’m assuming school is out?
Y E S
$20 says I can sneak out of here without bridezilla roping me into a stupid arts and crafts project 
I hope so, I’m enjoying talking to you today. 
aren’t you at work??
Nope. Today is my day off. 
and you’re not watching baseball and drinking beer?
It’s not even noon yet. 
time is an illusion
it’s shots o clock somewhere or whatever they say
I’m now learning that the only cultural education you have is the Backstreet Boys. I think our second date will have to be a movie marathon. 
already planning our second date?
ambitious 
I like it
My conversation is fairly limited if I can’t drop a pop culture reference or two during the day. 
I can see your points and i’m willing to sit myself down and watch the classics
okay gotta sneak past bridezilla… wish me luck
Good luck 
  Thursday 4:35 PM
Pork shoulder, corn, and potatoes all on the grill. 
i’m jealous
I can’t cook to save my life 
thank god we’re going out tonight
To celebrate finally breaking free for the summer?
exactly!! steph and izzie decided we needed to go to a club after dinner
i’ve never been to one before 
Overpriced drinks and random guys grinding up on you all night. Not the best experience. 
oh so random guys grind on you when you go out?
Shut up. 
hahahaha 
I’ve never even been to a club before. Not my scene. I just live with women so I know these things. 
well i’ll update you on the happenings
let you know if I have to pay $20 for a drink
who’s grinding on my ass
you know normal everyday things
Woah woah woah. 
what??
are you jealous??
I’m just saying if you’re gonna be shaking your ass, you might as well get random guys to buy you overpriced drinks. 
you’re making some very good points 
Of course I am. By the way, George wants me to tell you that you have a very shakeable ass so you should be taking in free drinks. 
great I have to go die again 
brb gonna drOWN MYSELF IN THE SHOWER 
  Thursday 10:38 PM
good news
i’ve secured three free drinks and a round of shots for all six of us
this ass is making money baby
I’ve created a monster. Who else is there?
steph, izzie, april, maggie, and levi
You brought the whole staff out didn’t you?
yes and I’m quite skilled at getting them drunk
You’re three drinks in and still texting correctly?
I think I danced it all off
need more fireball
And that’s another thing. Who willingly shoots Fireball?
me bitch
Ohh I love it when you call me names. 
mmm i’m sure you do
okay i’m gonna go get more drinks
wish me luck
Good luck, I’m sure your ass will take in more than enough. 
  Thursday 11:57 PM
Incoming Voice Call
“Helloo?”
“Hi, it’s me.”
“I can afford caller ID, I knew it was you.”
“Were you sleeping?”
“No, I was about to head upstairs but I’m not tired.”
“Oh good. I just got home.”
“You sound tired. Did you have fun?”
“It was nice, Steph went home with some guy she met and Izzie went to her boyfriends so I’m home alone.”
“So you decided to call me?”
“I missed your voice, I told you that you have a nice voice.”
“You said that I have a sexy voice.”
“Oh shut up. I wanted to call before I went to sleep.”
“You’ve grown fond of me haven't you?”
“If you’re gonna say it like a weirdo then yes… I have grown fond of you, Snow White.”
“I guess I can say the same about you Bar Princess. Are you yawning over there?”
“Just a little bit, but I like talking to you.”
“It’s midnight, I wouldn’t blame you for falling asleep.”
“I don’t wanna fall asleep, I wanna keep talking to you.”
“How about I tell you the story of the time I was bridesman and I had to go to a bachelorette party?”
“Okay I’m listening…”
  Friday 10:15 AM
I feel like a teenager 
who the hell falls asleep on the phone
i’m in a bad rom com aren't I 
Your snoring is really cute. 
oh christ
well at least I didn’t take body shots off a male stripper
I was really hoping you’d be asleep before I got to that part. 
oh nooo I remember that very clearly 
i’ll be filing that away for blackmail
Rude. I guess I’ll save your snoring in that file too. 
touché, I like the way you play the game
I’m an experienced player. Gotta go scrub in on a fundoplication. 
have fun!!!
  Friday 2:41 PM
I got bored and googled a fundoplication
that’s some crazy stuff, you’re kind of a badass
Easy peasy, all in a day's work. 
nooo that’s amazing stuff!! 
i’m in my classroom scraping gum and glitter off of the desks
Well you’re the reason people become doctors so I'd say you’re pretty important too. 
awww you’re still trying to impress me
it’s a good look on you
I’m trying to be a gentleman. Maybe I’ll bring up your puke shoes just to be an asshole. 
you know what even the mention of that can’t bring down my good mood
do you think I could get in trouble for drinking wine in my classroom?
Well there’s no kids around so… no. But I like the rebellious attitude you have towards the situation. 
if i’m gonna sit in a classroom with no AC and scrape boogers off desks all day then I deserve some damn wine
You’re right and you should say it. 
I DESERVE MY WINE I EARNED IT
oh shit maggie is outside i’m so fired
Hey you got her free shots last night, she should be thankful. 
you know what you’re right
oh shit it’s bridezilla
Run.
whew
forgot we have our final dress fitting tomorrow
i’m not dead yet
Oh good. I kinda don’t want the first time I see you to be your funeral. 
hahaha very funny
gotta go, we have to do this stupid year end meeting
I hate it here
Have fun, and remember don’t stab yourself with a pen!
  Saturday 8:13 AM
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING
I wanna die 
bridezilla is making us jog
and she took away my donuts
  Saturday 9:53 AM
Jesus Christ. You need new friends. 
honestly she’s not that bad when she’s not stressing over this wedding 
she’s crying because she has a pimple
Oof that’s a tough run. Unfortunately, I have to spend the day out on a boat. 
boohoo I don’t not feel bad for you
unless like… you have some childhood trauma from a boat
Nope. I get to relax and drink beer all day long. 
yeah well then screw you
I have to try my stupid dress on and go to a stupid lunch and I CAN’T EVEN HAVE DONUTS
Aren’t you at home?
yes, steph invited everyone here since we have the space
why?
Check your porch. 
YOU BROUGHT ME DONUTS?! 
you’re my favorite
thank you thank you thank you 
You’re welcome, I’m happy to be of service. 
ohhhh I might just kiss you when we finally meet 
I wouldn’t say no to that. 
okay I gotta go hide in the closet and eat my donuts 
thank you for thinking of me!!
It’s all I ever do. 
  Saturday 2:16 PM
How goes the dress trying on?
it was good!! mine fits and we have a beautiful bride on our hands 
Good. I’m glad your day is getting better. I think I’m getting a sunburn. 
you better not
that shit is dangerous 
go find sunscreen 
Now you’re concerned about me huh?
always
did you put the sunscreen on
Yes because I knew you’d spontaneously implode if I didn’t. 
good 
I didn’t want to you to burst into flames sitting in the sun
As a doctor, I can tell you that most likely would not be what happened.
now we have to sit through a boring ass lunch
it’s what the mother of the groom insists on
Is she paying for it though? …. yes
Well then stop complaining.
okay okay fine
hey quick question
which fork do i stab myself with
Go order a steak and drink an expensive glass of wine.
  Saturday 10:39 PM
Incoming Voice Call
“Well well well, how the tables have turned.” “Bar Priiiiiincessss.” “Oh my god. This is so going in the blackmail file.”
“No don’t do that. If Jo finds out I was singing to another girl she’ll be mad.” “And why don’t you want Jo to be mad at you?” “Because I want to kiss her. And hug her. And see her face.”
“Well do I have a surprise for you.” “Oh I love surprises!”
“Jo and Bar Princess are the same person. I’m Jo.” “Holy crap! NO way!”
“Yes way, isn’t that crazy?”
“Can you tell Jo that she’s the nicest person I’ve ever met.” “I will relay the message. Jo is going to bed now though. Goodnight Alex.” “Good night Bar Princess, I miss you!”
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lovemesomesurveys · 5 years ago
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1. Have you ever bought 99 cent chicken nuggets at Wendy’s? Yeah, back when I could still eat spicy foods I used to get the spicy chicken nuggets there. They were bombbb. 2. How much would you charge to pet-sit a Chihuahua for 5 days? Oh man... I don’t like the yappiness, I’m sorry. :X I don’t know if I could do it. Especially 5 days... that’s a lot. 3. Have you ever played Bejeweled? I probably have at some point. 4. When was the last time you slipped while taking a shower? I haven’t had that issue. 5. Does your mom have a Facebook? Yep.
6. Who would you never give a kidney to? A close friend/family. <<< I’m assuming you thought this was asking who you would give a kidney to, yeah?  Anyway, I don’t know if I could give a kidney to anyone. Like, I don’t know if mine are strong enough to function with just one. I I used to get them checked once a year growing up, but not as often since I became an adult. I mean, they seem to be doing their thing. I just don’t know how my body would react with just one. So yeah, possibly no one. 7. What was the last show you watched on Nickelodeon? On TeenNick I often watch their 90s segment at night. They air Rugrats, Doug, Hey Arnold, and Rocko’s Modern Life. I only like the first 3. 8. Have you ever been bitten by a rat? Nooooo. 9. Do you feel sticky right now? ...No. 10. Why do you not wash off your makeup on some nights? I haven’t worn makeup in like a year, but anyway when I did I admit I didn’t always wash it off at the end of the day. It was just out of laziness, honestly.  11. Do you think that's healthy? I know it’s not good for the skin, ya gotta let it breathe and whatnot. 12. Then why do you do it? I was a lazy bitch. 13. Who is the most annoying person you know? Me. I get on my own damn nerves. The other night I don’t know wth was wrong with me, but I was in a really chatty mood for some reason and I was like, ‘oh my god SHUT UP’  14. What does he/she do that makes you annoyed by them? I’m just annoying. I’m moody, sensitive, whiny, clingy (when it comes to my mom), I randomly get in chatty moods, and I can’t seem to get my shit together.  15. How often do you use a film camera and develop pictures? I don’t.  16. Do you like Smiley Central? What’s that? 17. What do you like/dislike about the show, One Tree Hill? I never watched it. 18. Why do people watch that stuff? They like it? We all have our preferences. I watch other shows of that type/genre, I just never got into that one. 19. Why are headbands coming "back in style”? I didn’t know they ever really went out of style.  20. Did you wear headbands when you were younger? Sometimes. 21. How many people do you know are on vacation right now? No one that I know of. 22. Do Uncrustables look disgusting to you, or is that just me? They’re good. 23. How are people's personalities living in the north, as opposed to the south? Uhhh. 24. What has been the corniest thing you've seen/heard today? Nothing so far. 25. Do puppy dog faces work on you? When actual dogs make them. haha. My doggo knows this. 26. What do you think nudists do when they are on their period? Why are you even thinking about that. 27. Don't say tampon, what if they just did not have the ability to use one? Wtf. 28. Well...would you ever try a nudist cult for a day? Noooo. 29. How about Amish...for a month? No. 30. Describe the shirt you are wearing. It’s a powder blue Adidas hoodie. 31. Would you ever go streaking? Noooo. 32. Right now? No. I don’t like being nude if you didn’t pick up on that by now. I don’t feel comfortable and I’m waaaaaay too self-conscious. I don’t even want to look at myself. 33. When was the last time you cut your hair and fucked it up? I used to cut my own bangs back when I had them and I did an okay job.  34. When was the last time you tried to be seductive? Ha, there’s nothing seductive about me. I’m awkward af. 35. What is your favourite kind of wallpaper? I don’t have one. 36. Do you ever joke with your friend about humping? Uh, no. 37. What was the last research paper you wrote about? I don’t recall. 38. Did you ever buy those pencils with your name already printed on them? I’m sure I had some when I was a kid. 39. Did it piss you off when you couldn't find your name? I have a very common name. 40. Do you have a curvy tummy? No. 41. Doesn't internet on the cell phone suck? It works great on mine. I think you just aged yourself with this question, survey. The internet on smart phones works good. 42. When was the last time you bought cereal for the prize inside? Not since I was a kid. The prizes were always cheesy, but I did like the color changing spoons that were in some. That was cool, ha. 43. Why do some Mexicans down the street look at you and everything… Wtf. 44. How many frames are in your room? 3. 45. What was the last fight you had about? Blah. 46. Have you ever had any doctors come to your house to check up on you? For a few months last year I had an in-home nurse that came twice a week. 47. What is the weirdest thing you have done in 7th grade? Pfft, who knows.  48. Are those mice with little red balls on it hard to control? You’re an odd one, survey maker. 49. What makes you ticked, get pissed off easily? I’m an irritable, moody person and some days it can really be anything. Nagging and getting lectured about things I already know and don’t need to be reminded of/lectured to about will definitely do it. I also don’t like being told to “chill out” or “calm down.” 50. Does blueberry syrup sound good to you, right now? I’m good right now, but I do like it.
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mmjina · 6 years ago
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hi guys !! i’m ume (21+, pst!) and this is another one of kwak jidam’s unfortunate children !!! ( i’m kidding but rly not their whole family is a lit revolt and we LOVE it ) aka kwak jina, she’s the second to last child! there’s more info under the cut as well as plots but pls like and i’ll definitely jump into your dms for some quick one on one 🤪🤪🤪
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again, kwak jina : mambo numba 5 kwak 5 canon for ref!
another one of kwak jidam’s kids ( probably among the ones who resent her the most)
don’t get her wrong she Loves her family ( but they can overwhelm her )
safe to say that her childhood wasn’t Great bc of her mom is an understatement
she lost a LOT of friends bc of her mom aka a lot of kids’ parents would tell their kids to not play with her which led to a lot of sad conversations of “sorry jina, we can’t play anymore bc my mom said your mom is a bad person” and as a kid you just think bad person = Evil aka jina slowly becoming to resent her mom more and more bc of her ‘Evil’ ways
she kind of has it twisted in her head that her mom is selfish and greedy but she also doesn’t quite Get her mother or her reasoning behind doing what she does ( nor does she really care at this point )
she never really grows out of that same resentment but it’s more like she just ignores her mom and goes out of her way to Disassociate herself from anything that has to do with kwak jidam
aka the reincarnation of kwak jina !!! aka straight O’s in all her exams ; definitely part of the top 5% of her class because what is kwak jina without her sparkling grade point average !! 
an over-achieving sob who’s a tad catty but y’know what if people are talking about her grades or the cute boy she’s dating or her pretty smile the less they’re talking about her Ruined family
her attitude isn’t all that great tbh she’s a bit blunt and not at all Grade A Friendly when it comes to first encounters but first impressions are always blown away by her smile !!!
but when a bish opens her mouth it’s like Lmfao, who you ???
she’s really self-conscious and it shows a good 66% of the time, she’s always making sure she’s not catching herself slipping bc girl always has to be Pretty, Perfect, Poised !! 
aka her trying her hardest to Not be like her mom
( but lbr she’s probably more like her mom than she realizes but like Hell will she ever admit or see to that reasoning )
personally she’s 0 to 100 on the hostility scale if you say her name and her mom’s name in the same sentence
she wishes she was the hbic but she’s so much of a try hard that she’s just a Bitch
but like an ogre, jina has layers and at her core i promise she’s as sweet as cotton candy
but lbr she probably reserves that spot for her siblings and like 2.5 others
HC: like the rest of her siblings she’s got divination down to a Pat but girlie hates her mom so she Purposely failed divination class once ( bc thats all her pride would allow her ) as a sign of protest
also some yosul info:
fourth year , cheong ryeong , kwak family legacy ( ew lmfao )
electives: dada, wizarding literature, care of magical creatures
PLOTS
old childhood friends who’ve since became estranged because of familial influence aka among the throng who slapped a “i’m sorry jina, my parents said your mom is icky so i can’t play with you anymore” and yeeted outta there
thick as thieves friends ( bc we all know jina doesn’t have a lot of them ) but pls give this Gross girl a friend who’ll stay w her through thick and thin she’s sick of ppl leaving her
ppl she can actually break down in front of bc she feels stress keeping up w everyone’s expectations of who she is and how her family is and she’s kind of SIck of pretending to be this Perfect Person but she keeps it up bc it’s better than hearing the nasty things about her
self-preservation at its finest
so someone who just breaks it down to her that she doesn’t need to be this person ( while she won’t listen,, u know Effort Counts )
exes? girl has trust issues that’s for sure and that has definitely leaked into her love life making most if not all her rls not work out bc she fears they’re going to leave her or find something about her that they suddenly don’t like so she’s really out here beating them to the punch
ok but an ex who she was so reluctant to break up with but she Did it anyways because she’s hard to please but she’s lowkey still in love with them but she’s too Stubborn to fuckin!! admit!! she !! was !! wrong !!
ok but pls give me someone jina punched bc she was angry and she misplaced her anger onto you by accident !1!! has she apologize d ??? oof we dunno 👀
ok but also someone who fucks around w jina bc they know this complex of hers and just has fun with playing w her heart ( yes Destroy Her !!! )
fwb !! cute fluffy rls ( for the 2.5 ppl who were able to peel her layers ) !! 
people she tutors bc jina w that sparkling gpa doesn’t mind doing God’s work and helping the unfortunate 
omg pls give me pureblood family turmoil aka if your pureblood family hates jina’s mom lMFAO RIP INTO JINA even tho jina would be like dude you don’t like my mom? Lmfao Same! but that would be funny
an extension to the last bullet = ppl who view jina as an extension of her mom and her reputation ( jina would grow to hate you but lbr we think you deserve it a little if you do this )
if you’re on the varisty quidditch team ,,, you’ve probably seen her with her brother junsu checking out the Talent 👀aka You, you’re the talent
insert: you said something and jina just RiPPED into you and to this day you’re like wtf? u crazy fsadjkasda*sfhdsjf
HER FAMILY PLS COME !!11! CONTROL JINA !!1! bitch needs to chill but she can’t find her fucks
tbh we’re down for anything and everything !!1! we’re just Hyped to be here !!!
shit this got long im Sorry fam
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that-one--book-nerd · 5 years ago
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My middle school did “Cats” when I was in 7th grade and here’s what I remember
this is unfortunately true and I will now document the vague memories I have of a time that I’ve either consciously or subconsciously blocked from my memory all alone in the moonlight. With the recent release of the new Cats movie trailer, I thought it would be fun to reflect on this…time…in my life
CONTEXT:
it was 2013; I was in 7th grade
the director didn’t cut anyone after auditions which left the cast really big and not all that great
alright yeet let’s go
I was in the ensemble and was a Pollicle in the Pekes and Pollicle song
basically, I was a human pretending to be a cat pretending to be a dog in a musical called Cats
seventh grade me thought this was hilarious
I was also in the “rum tum tugger” song, and our director told us ensemble girls to fangirl over rum tum tugger like he was one direction or Justin Bieber, prompting all of the 11–14 y/o girls to scream at the top of their lungs, myself included. I am not proud.
it was 2013 please cut us some slack for this at least
the production was done in the round, meaning there were audience members on all four sides of our square “set”
so instead of having a “backstage” area, the ensemble just fucking sat around the stage, mere inches away from the first row’s feet
we were all supposed to kneel on our knees to make room for everyone
since there were like…I don’t even remember, like at least 35+ kids in the cast??? I’m probably wrong but it doesn’t matter
but some fucking assholes just pLOPPED THEMSELVES DOWN CRISS-CROSS APPLESAUCE and left the rest of us with vague claustrophobia from being tightly compacted next to each other like a bunch of sad cat-looking sardines
okay well there was some kind of “backstage” area bc some ensemble members had to add extra accessories to their costume for whatever number they were in and the pollicles and pekes had an area and this one bitch that sat next to me always took the shit that I wore for the pekes/pollicles number and I don’t remember if we had assigned shit or not but basically I always used the same things and this bitch kept taking mine and she’d look at me right in the eyes as she’d take my empty tissue box (it was a prop/costume piece) and leave
I don’t know why this particular moment is filling me with unsettled rage even after 6 years and yet here we are
I was also in the fucking train song and we made the “train” out of hula hoops covered in cloth and shit and other things whatever and maybe I’m remembering this bc I was always a part of the train so I never really saw how it looked but from the memories of the director screaming at us, the train always looked like shit and I felt like I was always pulling my weight
in the opening song(s) we were told to make eye contact with an audience member and I still feel guilty for everyone who had to deal with that
a girl who pretended to be my friend but was really a huge bitch and made me want to kill myself the previous year had a lead (one of the sneaky twin cats, who cares) and I hated having to watch her have fun performing while I just sat there pretending to be interested in what she was doing
there were strobe lights AND fog during one song and i hated them
our director straight up told us “Cats ran for so long because people loved the dancing! They didn’t give a crap about the story!” as if there was/is a story
the experience as a whole scarred me for years to come
okay now here are some fun and positive things I remember!
props to my friend Taylor who years later during a rehearsal in high school this:
“yeah Cats at [our middle school] was the first show I was ever in and I thought you were supposed to feel embarrassed on stage and I didn’t really like it. I don’t know what made me come back and do the music man next year but I’m glad I did because it’s not really fair to judge the whole of theatre on one singular shitty show”
she went on to do shows in high school and scored some great leads IMO and I’m proud of her for sticking with theatre especially after a traumatizing experience like middle school Cats
the best part of the show was “memory” and it was sung by my friend Eliza who was and still is one of the best singers ever. like i had no clue what was going on half of the time bc wtf even is the plot of cats but memory genuinely brought 13 y/o me to tears
ONCE DURING A SHOWOUR BAND DIDN’T START PLAYING “MEMORY” FOR SOME REASON (IT WAS EITHER A LIVE BAND OR A RECORDED TRACK WHATEVER) SO *I* STARTED HUMMING THE OPENING NOTES TO KEEP MYSELF ON TRACK BUT SUDDENLY THE REST OF THE CAST (WHO ARE ALL STILL SITTING AROUND THE STAGE, REMEMBER) STARTED HUMMING TOO AND THE NEXT THING I KNEW WE WERE ALL HUMMING THE SONG AND TRYING TO KEEP THE SHOW ROLLING BC THE SHOW MUST GO ON AND SOON ENOUGH THE REAL MUSIC STARTED PLAYING AND THE NEXT DAY ELIZA TOLD EVERYONE
“I don’t know who started that but seriously thank you SO much I love you”
AND I NEVER TOLD ANYONE EXCEPT LIKE MAYBE 2 PEOPLE THAT IT WAS *ME* UNTIL I WENT TO ELIZA’S GRADUATION PARTY FIVE YEARS LATER AND WROTE A NOTE TELLING HER THAT I DID IT AND YEAH
A good friend of mine to this day did make-up for the show (just another fun and positive thing) and did a great job and is still a great artist :)
every time I’m talking with some fellow theatre friends I love to whip this tidbit out when we’re talking about the Worst Shows we’ve been in. I always get disbelieving stunned silence
sorry for the long post and thanks for coming to my TEDTalk and tbh I can’t wait to see Cats when the movie comes out because I can’t wait to make fun of it lmao
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dorkylittleweirdo · 5 years ago
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Last giant camp post unless i think of more stuff and I probably will
So this is from the last day
~
We were all in a huddle before any of the kids got there (so all the instructors and assistants) and everyone was saying at least one good or memorable thing that happened to them this summer. SV goes "AL FARTED RIGHT. HERE AND THAT WS THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME" and AL is like oml and our little cheer we did when put our hands in was "AL FARTED"
~
One of my girls brought me starbucks and another gave me a popsicle
~
Assistants and instructors were playing this game called assassin and we had to mark someone's hand with a sharpie to kill them and everyone had an assigned person so it was a mess
~
So SB had me bc she tried to get me twice then DENIED that she had me so I obviously called bs but ya know
~
So me and J were in the classroom helping with retakes and NOTHING was where it should be. So 3 different people came in and told him what to do and he got fucking stressed as shit and I was gently like "hey go outside for a sec and take a breather, I can handle everything in here" and he's like "nah I got this" but then someone else came in and told him what to do and he lost it and yelled and said he quit (he didn't actually he was just fed up) and I was like "ok go outside, go to the break room, go somewhere outside of this room for a few minutes and I'll take care of everything and come back for you when it's all set up"
So he agreed and walked outside for a while and holy fuck there was so much to do and so little time. So I was running around making copies and passing out tests and telling people who needed to do what and 2 other assistants came in (SB and ST) and started fucking around and I was like "if you're not going to help, LEAVE" and they never see me pissed off and stressed to that extent so they were freaked. ST left and SB stayed and I was like "ok you need to do this, and this is your one and only warning, my fight or flight instinct is HIGHTENED rn so if you touch me in any way, I WILL hit you with whatever's in my hand and probably apologize later" and she's like "oh shit ok"
so I have a folder in my hand, I'm calling out names, what's this bitch do? Comes up behind me and marks me with the sharpie, I wheeled around and smacked her with it and glared at her and she's laughing like ok bitch sorry this fucking game was more important to you than me not having a fucking panic attack. So I go "leave" and she's like "oh come on it's the game-" "I told you if you weren't going to help, then leave. So get out. Now" and she's like "ok damn" so I FINALLY finished everything and I went out to get J and he's like "damn how bad did it go" and I'm like "what" and he goes "idk man you looked pissed off and you're shaking" and I'm like "oh yeah bc SB and ST were fucking around and ST left but SB stayed and pretended to help so she could mark me after I literally said I was super stressed and to not touch me or Bad Things would happen and now Anxiety Has Peaked" and he's like "oh shit sit down when we get in there"
So I be sitting and then SB comes back in and I'm still pussed at her I'm like "you're grading the tests when the kids give them to you and putting the tests in the folders" and me and J helped answer questions after J explained how to grade the tests
So she finished grading then left and me and J high fived like "we almost fucking died but it's all good now"
~
Our boss brought us food and it was Really Fucking Good
~
Gave a child my stand up paddle board in exchange for his normal board and he was hype and so was I bc i hate SUPs
~
Found out at the end of the day that SB graded the tests WRONG and we had to regrade them
~
Dumped ice on SB
~
So I never left the lake yesterday and neither did my friend H bc it be like that sometimes. So we went to a burger place and got fries and shakes and banana splits and it was really good
~
Got cough drops at the 7/11 and H got a slushie and wouldn't stop singing freeze your brain and I was dying and I joined her but then like 4 other people joined in including one of the workers and I was crying
~
So we were doing our rewards ceremony and assistants sit with the instructors up front so we all had to introduce ourselves when our group went up. E and J introduced themselves and people cheered, the other 2 assistants said their names and how long they've been there and stuff but nobody did anything, then it was my turn and I was like "hey what's up I'm JC-" and it was too loud for me to finish right away bc ALL my kids were SCREAMING and the top of their lungs like normal screaming, "woooo", "we love you", normal stuff, then when it was dying down and I was about to finish my thing one of my boys screams "CHEESE BUTT FUNGUS" bc that was our inside joke for the session bc reasons and I was laughing while I finished and one of the supervisors is like wtf
~
I won a leadership award ^-^
~
All my kids ran for me and were crying and hugging me and I'm like "I'll see you guys next summer it's oK"
~
I thanked all the instructors for everything and they're "oml child ;0;" and there was a lot of hugging and crying
~
TL pulled me aside and was like "ok so I might not be here next summer-" and I was like ";0; nooo TL-" and she's like "bruh I'm not done" and told me how proud she is of me and how much I've grown since i was a tiny 12 year old and she hopes I'll have a good life and be more confident with myself and that she can call me her for real coworker in a couple years and I was Crying and so was she and it was a mess
~
I was the last assistant left and I was helping clean up and JJ saw me taking in the last few paddle boards and it like "JC what are you still doing here??? l e a v e" and I was like "oml fine" I said bye to everyone and that I'd see them next summer
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dreammutual-remade · 7 years ago
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best friends to lovers!lucas
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request: ok ur SO FUNNY when i was reading ur hyunjin scenario i almost pissed my pants istg ur fckin hilarious !! and could you do like a best friends to lovers type trope with lucas from nct? love ur writing and please go nuts my guy <3 <3 - @nctro​
word count: 3.7k
a/n: djfhgkhdj thank u sO MUCH everyone who compliments me on here makes me blush dhbfkhsbdk anywhom I actually enjoyed writing this so much mainly because I love big dumb boys and Lucas is one of those !!!! I hope u like it bby<3
warnings ?: cursing and brief mentions of underage drinking 
okie doke babe
l e t s d i v e i n
let’s set the scene fellas
you’re in like the second grade right
boys are: disgusting and mean
but this is when you meet your bestie !!!!!
lucas was a new kid all the way from china and he was , the only boy you’d ever found cute
(i mean y’all have seen those baby pics oh my gOD HE WAS SO CUTE)
and when the teacher introduced him he was obviously a bubbly kid but none of the others in your class seemed to warm up to him
:((((
later when you all are at recess he keeps trying to join the boys but they won’t let him because as previously stated
THEYRE MEAN AND GROSS
he looks so so sad and lonely and you’re a Sweet Baby Girl so you go up to him and ask if he wants to play w/ u :)))
he’s so excited !!!! hooray !!!!!!!!!!
you guys play house and BAM
BEST FRIENDS FOREVER
your friendship lasts all through elementary school !!
even in fourth grade when you guys were in different classes he would come find you at recess and your moms would arrange play dates :))))
middle school was,
middle school
we don’t talk abt that
all you need to know is that it was embarrassing
and yeehaw we’ve made it thotties aLL THE WAY TO SENIOR YEAR
let’s do a brief summary of 9th-11th grade
9th grade:
lucas is taller than you but only by a little and his voice breaks every other sentence
his ears are still too big for his body :(
you are a late bloomer and still look 12 but you’re , TRYING YOUR BEST
you guys have about half of your classes together but remain really close since you eat lunch together and hang out after school too
lucas attempts to join the basketball team
he . doesn’t make it and is v upset so you have to come over and comfort your Pitiful Man Baby
he cries a little and ouchie yOUR HEART hurts
but then he’s like u never saw that THOT
and so you are forced into silence rip
10th grade:
lucas FINALLY gets his permit halfway through the year because he fuckinh forgot to do it last year and you’re TERRIFIED but it’s fine
you’re starting to look more like a female and less like a fetus congrats !!!!!
lucas has now grown to almost 6 feet tall what the FUCK BRO
he grew at least 6 inches over the summer and you don’t really notice until one day you’re like uhhh excuse me since when are you half a foot taller than me
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
and this boy LORDS his height over you
purposefully places things where you can’t reach it so he can be like
*tips fedora* m’lady , are u in need of assistance
after this you have perfected the art of pinching his arm til he screeches
also his voice has gotten sooooo so so deep
like okay darth vader CHILL OUT
with all this height though he is even clumsier than before
it’s like he forgets he’s now a giant 15 yr old
he’s always covered in scratches and bruises so you’ve taken to carrying disney princess bandaids
they’re disney princess because you thought it would embarrass him and encourage him not to get hurt but
he loves them so it didn’t work rip
he tries out for the basketball team again and genuinely makes it based on height alone
i mean the boy can barely dribble but ??? he can learn i guess
he calls you when he makes it and screams for 45 seconds straight
you don’t know wtf goin on so you’re like oh mY GOD ARE U OKAY
and he’s like yES BITCH I MADE THE TEAM
and then you scream for 45 seconds
next time you see him in person you tackle him with a hug and he lifts you up and spins you around because wow !!!!! so happy !!!!
11th grade:
ah, yes
the year of PARTYING
you always go to parties together and switch who’s dd each time
eventually more friends start coming with you so that you can both get drunk tho ayy
but for the first couple times it’s either drunk lucas half draped on you as you drag him home or sober lucas carrying your lightweight ass to the car
he’s a real one so he won’t say anything about the time you were really drunk and got separated from him so you stood on a table and screamed his name til he came and snatched you down lmao
lucas has reached full height as well so he’s like, so much bigger than you
also he’s gotten so much better at basketball and is practically the star of the team
you go to every game and cheer as loud as you can bc that’s your BOY
puberty is Complete for you and you look female and everything!!!! go off queen 
lucas is now on Protective Mode since you’re really cute and a very agreeable drunk and under no circumstances will he allow you to be taken advantage of
NOT on my watch- lucas
alright we’re gonna make senior year the present timeline bc
YOLO
lucas is officially more popular than you
BUT
he actually sticks around because he’s The Best
okay also this guy just keeps getting larger
like he got all tall but THEN
he was doing basketball so much and just genuinely enjoyed doing sports in general that our boy was thicc with two(2) got damn c’s
you don’t notice that much until he gets into a habit of throwing you over his shoulder whenever you won’t pay attention to him
and it’s , unnerving how easily he does it
he’s started wearing shirts that show off his, eh hem, assets
long story short he’s hot as fuck and even you see him and you’re like DAYUM
also every female in your school is. ALL OVER HIM
it’s hard to walk next to him in the halls because people genuinely shove you out of the way to get next to him
at first you just kind of let it happen and he didn’t notice the first few times
that made u hella emo :(((((
but now he INSISTS upon holding your hand and dragging you behind him through the crowds
you highkey blush the whole time and everyone is all ArE yOu GuYs DaTiNg ?!/&:&:$
lucas is like NO.
:))))
ouchie
you start overthinking things because ??? would it really be so bad to be dating you jeez
you’re not terribly ugly or anything ???
at least you don’t think so
oh my god he thinks you’re ugly and annoying and he hates you
self hatred commence in 3,2,....... someone play the icarly theme song
you lowkey start distancing yourself and he himself is busy busy bee so
you start seeing less of each other :/
and you miss him soooo so much (this is your own doing BITCH) but it doesn’t even seem like he misses you at all wtf
he’s just having a great time w/ his basketball boy(friend)s and everyone loves him and you’ve been hashtag left behind :(
he really didn’t mean to he just !!!! has so much going on aaaa
and like in his absence you start realizing a lot of things
like how much you actually liked his cringey ass flirting
you would always smack him every time he was like “oh sorry, just got lost in ur eyes what did u say :3”
you miss his hugs because they were really rEALLY GOOD
he tucks you under his chin and squishes you or he’ll just wrap his arms around and pick you up
your feet just ???? dangle
you miss when he would show up at your house at like 11 with a bunch of shitty foreign films and force you to watch them with him
you miss when you both would fall asleep in a pile on the couch and he would wake up and carry you to bed
because he’s an angel THATS WHY
anywhom
you miss everything about him and you just are so upset that he doesn’t pay that much attention to you
it gets WORSE when you notice some other girl hanging out with him
and she’s prettier than you and apparently good enough for his attention when you aren’t and you’re just so full of
what’s the word
JEALOUSY.mp3
go listen to jealousy by monsta x
but obviously you’re not going to acknowledge that because what’s a good friends to lovers story without a hearty helping of denial
he still tries to hang out with you so you guys do see each other in class and at least a couple weekends out of the month but :(((
it’s nowhere near how close you were
it all comes to a head when one day you’re walking in the hall and it’s hella crowded
way worse than usual
and in the center of the crowd is
you guessed it :’-)
our boy yukhei
and he just asked this girl to the winter formal and she’s nodding and smiling and hugging him and he’s smiling too and you
gotta go
your eyes are already starting to water and you start skirting around the edges of the crowd to get to a bathroom
one of your other friends jeno who also plays with lucas on the team sees you and smiles and lifts his hand
but it immediately shifts into a frown when he sees your face
he reaches out to grab your wrist and asks if you’re okay and what’s wrong
you just bring your other hand up to sloppily wipe at your watery eyes and whisper that it’s nothing
the hand he’s got in his grasp has started to shake and he looks really worried so he tugs you around the corner until he doesn’t see anyone around
and he turns to look you in the eyes all Serious
“alright. spill”
and you just
BURST INTO TEARS
he panics and hesitantly puts an arm around your shoulders to pat your back
you just press your forehead into his shoulder and cry
it’s a short cry though because although we are dramatic out here we aren’t doing The Absolute Most
you pull away and wipe your eyes and take a few deep breaths before you apologize
jeno smiles sadly and pats your head and says it’s okay and that he hopes it helped
you stand there for 37 seconds exactly in silence
jenos been counting
and then you let the cat out of the bag
you adMIT FINALLY !!!!!
that you are really in love with your bff/sort of ex-bff and you’re really jealous and sad because he doesn’t even CARE about you anymore
at first jeno is quiet but then he starts laughing
and he won’t stop
and you’re like if you keep going i’m going to cry again please i’m so sensitive
and he shuts up immediately and is like o_o
but then he grips you by your shoulders and is like hEY
“guess what”
“god jeno i am really not in the mood”
“no for real guess what the fuck is up”
“what is up ???? what is up you asshole ???”
“yukhei is in love with you too”
you scoff and roll your eyes
“this is a really lame attempt to make me feel better”
“no really i’m not even lying i swear he talks about you all the time in the locker room and he literally thinks you’re an angel”
“okay but its platonic as hell like obviously we love each other after all these years but he doesn’t like ME in the way i like HIM”
“how do you know??”
“how do YOU know ?????”
“,,,,,, you got me there”
you pat his shoulder and you’re like listen i really appreciate you trying to make me feel better but it’s time for me to accept my fate
now you and lucas still text semi regularly and send each other memes and stuff
but you just, cut him off because you physically can’t move on if you interact with him at all you LOVE this boy
he def notices and texts you a few times like
y/n ??? hello? is your phone broken?
but when you stop waving back at him in the hallways and actively avoiding him he realizes you’re not talking to him
and this poor boy cannot for the life of him figure out why
he doesn’t UNDERSTAND
god he’s dumb but we still stan
he figures you want him to leave you alone so he just stares at your forlornly from afar
this just pisses you off bc like wtf nOW YOURE GONNA PAY ATTENTION TO ME ??????
a couple weeks pass and it’s time for winter formal
yay.
you’ve been dragged here by jeno who is SURE that something important is gonna happen tonight and lucas is gonna Fix Everything
yeah OKAY
SURE
you may not want to go but you wouldn’t be caught DEAD not stunting on these hoes
you show up looking absolutely SPICY
QUEEN OF WINTER
you know you had to do it to em
jeno forcefully pulls you into the doors of the gymnasium and then disappears after he threatens you with an
“i told chenle not to let you leave”
and you turn to look at chenle who is SGA and helping with the dance and he gives you an “i’m watching you” hand motion
god this is ridiculous
you sigh and go find some of your other friends
you hate to admit this but. you actually had a little fun
and then of course
a slow song was played
and the dj is all yo everyone find you a honey it’s time to slow it down for a bit
sigh
you go to walk off the dance floor or find jeno or do SOMETHING other than stand around looking awkward surrounded by couples
but someone has snatched your hand up yo wtf
it’s LUCAS
and you just look at him with confusion
“dance with me, please. just this once,,,”
and you’re like hmmm pls don’t make me do this
but he hits you with Them Puppy Dog Eyes and you’re a goner
so you let him pull you close and hold you against his chest and rest his chin on the top of your head
you lift up on your toes so you can talk in his ear
“where’s your date?”
“dancing with her girlfriend”
“um. what”
“she’s not super duper out yet so i’m being her beard for the night. it was mainly to get her parents off her back”
“oh. huh”
“plus i missed you :(((( you disappeared”
your hands tighten in the fabric of his button up bc you’re like aw FUCK
you just shake your head and rest it back on his chest and close your eyes to enjoy it while you can
as much as you want to be convinced that things can go back to the way they were now
they cANNOT because you still love him and he still just thinks of you as a friend
maybe not even a best friend anymore :(
(again,, YOUR FAULT BITCH)
his GIANT warm hands slide across your waist to press you forward by the small of your back
at this point you are pressed together basically head to toe
and you can’t tell for sure but , you think he kissed the top of your head ???
maybe you were freakin hallucinating though since you’re losing oxygen fast due to his close proximity
the song ends and you slowly stop swaying and pull apart while everyone gets back to being wild
“can we.. go talk outside”
this sentence strikes FEAR in your heart but you take his proffered hand as he leads you outside
it’s cold as hell so you’re already wound up tight and wrapping your arms around yourself to keep warm
he notices quickly and wraps his jacket around you before turning to face outward towards the road
it’s quiet other than the muffled music from inside and crickets and other night noises
he opens his mouth to say something but you just blurt out
“i like you!!!!”
and he whips around to face you and you just. keep talking
“it’s oKAY i know you don’t like me back like that and i would never be mad at you about that i didn’t distance myself from you bc of that!!!! i just had to because it was hurting me to be around you and see you be with other girls and i really wanted to move on so that we could get back to being best friends if you even wanted that i just !!! IT JUST HAPPENED OKAy i’m sO SORRY AND I ComPLetely understand if you never want to speak to me again”
and he’s just staring at you and panting
why is he out of breath he’s just been standing there
you’re getting super duper nervous because he hasn’t said aNYTHING and it’s been at least a minute
and then he just goes
“you… like .. me ???”
and you’re like ugh YES you dumbass have you even met yourself you’re so cute and sweet and such a goofy boy and you’re way too nice to me and also HOT so like. you were asking for it
and he immediately swings you into his arms and gives you a big sloppy kiss on the cheek and buries his face in your shoulder and squeals
this man. SQUEALS
and you giggle because it’s tickling your neck hey stop that
and he’s laughing that loud ass cackle of his so you’re laughing too i mean have y’all heard that shit
GOOFY AS HELL
also he’s hugging you almost just like he used to with your feet dangling off the ground
and he pulls back to set you down but then
HE GRABS YOUR FACE
AND KISSES YOU  ??!/&8:$:$:92&
b i t c h
he’s so gentle and is patient when you kind of freeze at first, pulling away and pressing his lips very gently to the corner of your mouth before going Back In
and even though he’s given you NO EXPLANATION FOR THIS you kiss him back because this may be a one time only opportunity and you will NOT be wasting it 
he goes very slow and sweet and right before he pulls away he presses a cute lil smooch to your bottom lip and presses his forehead against yours
“what was that for?”
“oh yeah, i forgot to tell you!! i’m in love with you”
“oh hEY me too ??!!?!&/&”
and you’re both pressed together and giggling
“hey, you wanna ditch and go get some ice cream”
“absolutely”
so he lets his date know and you text jeno
(you: bIIIIIIIITTCHHHH    jeno: I KNEW IT)
and you’re off
he holds your hand the whole way there and when he parks he spRINTs around the car so he can open it for you
you each get an ice cream cone and sit next to each other at a picnic table and just talk and catch up with each other since you haven’t been talkin :/
one of your hands is laced with his and your head is leaned on his shoulder and he’s like hEY watch it this is my favorite shirt
and he flexes his arm with your head on it and you’re like god dAMN that’s a bicep
and he’s like ayy lmao arent u glad ur dating a greek demi god  🤪🤪
and you smack HIM
“i cant believe you just declared us as dating in the same sentence as calling yourself a greek demigod”
“are we ,,,, not dating”
“i mean personally, i haven’t gotten asked on a date yet. hmmmm, have you? :-)”
and he sighs dramatically before wrapping an arm around your waist and leaving a somewhat sticky kiss on your temple from the ice cream
he leans down to your ear
“hey so there’s this girl and her name is y/n and she’s so beautiful and funny and i love her so much do you think she would go on a date with me ? :3”
“hmmm well i guess so,,, she could give you a chance…..”
you hold a straight face for less than 5 seconds before you get all blushy and smiley and he squeals at you
......again
and grabs your face with his hands since he literally dEVOURED that ice cream cone
he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose and then to your lips and says against them,
“please~”
another kiss
“for me?~”
another
“cmon~”
and he goes in for another but you’re like oKAY okay i’ll date you you giant pain in my ass
and he���s like :-(((((((
(DONT BE MEAN TO THE BABY BOY)
and you’re like aw i’m sorry you’re MY giant pain in the butt
he seems pretty satisfied with that and after you finish your ice cream cone he is already at the door waiting with the door open
“if you dARE say m’lady i will walk home”
“of course ,,,,,,,,, m’lady”
“alrIGHT THATS IT”
he grabs your hand and pulls you back toward him to keep you from leaving and presses a kiss to your forehead and ruffles your hair a little
before he kindly and gently shoves you into the car
he drives home with one hand on the wheel while you mess with the fingers of his other hand because wow
that shit is amazing he’s got some big ole beautiful hands
when you arrive he walks you to your door and
this mf presses you against it and presses an absolutely SINFUL kiss onto your lips before turning around and heading back to his car
“bye, baby!! i’ll see u tmrw at school :-)))))”
and first of all: KKDKDNDKDJ
second: he called you baby it’s officially over for you bitch
you wave back blankly because what the hell just happened and then you go inside
you press yourself against the door after you close it behind you and press your hands into your warm cheeks
and woooo bOY what have you gotten yourself into
a supportive and caring boyfriend who LOVES YOU THATS WHAT !!!!!!!!
okay goodbye i really love wong yukhei xuxi lucas whatever the fuck his name is
739 notes · View notes
deathby-discozombies · 6 years ago
Text
A little more about ME
1. If you could buy any type of food what would you buy?
-right at the moment I would have to say cheese fries and wings from the hood store where I used to live.
2. What color is your tooth brush?
-magenta
3. If you could be any animal what would it be and why?
-a kangaroo, they have strong ass legs and I have a few people I would like to kick the shit out of
4. What is one of the things you would put on your “bucket” list?
-travel to Greece
5. Who is your favorite super hero and why?
-I'm more of a villian fan tbh. My favorite is Heath Ledger as the Joker
6. Who do you admire the most?
-my mom
7. What is your favorite summer activity?
-swimming
8. If a movie was made of your life what genre would it be, who would play you?
-I feel like they would ruin my life story and try to make it a lifetime movie or some shit. And some skinny bitch would be horrible at capturing my essence and thickness lol
9. If you could be any flavor of ice cream what ice cream flavor would you be and why?
-brownie batter, because I'm chocolate and chunky
10. Who is your favorite cartoon character and why?
-Tina Belcher, she's awkward and misunderstood. She just wants to be loved for who she is
11. If you could go any where in the world where would you go and why?
-Greece, because it is breathtakingly beautiful
12. What is your dream job?
-author of a best selling book series
13. Are you a morning or a night person?
-nightowl #vamplife
14. What is your favorite hobby?
-crafting or watching horror movies
15. What is one thing that annoys you the most?
-people who judge other people because they don't agree with their life choices
16. What is the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten?
-olives and nutella when I was pregnant with my youngest daughter
17. What is your favorite thing about someone in your family?
-they are unapologetically themselves no matter what
18. What is one of your weird quirks?
-I'm awkward?
19. Describe your self in 3 words.
-GIVES. NO. FUCKS
20. If you could trade lives with anyone for a day who would it be and why?
-my youngest daughter, because she is still so young and oblivious to how fucked up the world is. And I'm tired of being an adult
21. If you could talk in your sleep what would you say?
-I do talk in my sleep and I say random shit. I wake myself up sometimes
22. What is the first thing you do when you get up in the morning?
-kiss my baby girl
23. What is your favorite movie quote?
-You is kind. You is smart. You is important.
Annnnnndddd: ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU SPEAK IT?!
24. What is your favorite joke?
-how do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
25. What would you do on Mars for fun?
-Fuck martians, get money
26. If you could get yourself anything, what would you get?
-the will to live 😂😂😂 nah but seriously, a billion dollars
27. Where is the worst place you could get stuck?
-anywhere with my ex
28. What would you do with your “15 minutes” of fame?
-be too afraid to say anything
29. Where would you go if you where invisible?
-a bank vault
30. What is your favorite flavor of “Berty Bots every flavored beans”.
-watermelon
31. What is the one thing you own you wish you didn’t?
-a cell phone
32. Describe the perfect kiss in 3 words.
-Passionate. Long. French.
33. What is your biggest addiction?
-it was weed. Now, I guess it's my phone
34. Do you have a song that reminds you of a relationship if so what song?
-3005 by Childish Gambino
35. How many books have you read so far this year?
-zero and that makes me really sad
36. When I dance, I look like…?
-like a hot mess
37. Who have you met that you wish you hadn’t?
-any dude I've ever fucked
38. If you were famous what would you be famous for?
-writing
39. What is the worst job you could have?
-call center. I hated all the call center jobs I've had
40. What is your favorite T.V. channel?
-I don't really have a favorite channel
41. What is the thing your most afraid of?
-losing my mom or my kids
42. If you could paint anything what would you paint?
-a galaxy far away
43. What celebrity annoys you the most?
-any of the Kardashian's
44. What is the most interesting thing you have in your purse/wallet?
-my keychains
45. What is the meanest thing you’ve ever said to someone?
-I don't care what happens to you anymore, you're someone else's problem now.
46. If you could get a yacht what would you call it?
-Rocket Juiceboxx
47. What is your life long dream?
-for me and my family to never ever have to struggle financially again
48. If you could talk to the President what would you talk about?
-I'd only want to talk to Obama, Trump can kiss my natural black ass
49. Have you ever tried to do something you know you would be really bad at, what was it?
-riding a bike. Which I cannot do btw
50. On a scale of 1 to 10 how “cool” are you?
-10, duh
51. What is the best advantage to being really tall?
-I wouldn't know
52. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
-it depends on what I'm getting ready for
53. What is the one thing you have always wanted to do?
-runaway and start over where no one knows me
54. What TV sitcom family would you be a member of?
-Black-ish but only because I would be the one who would need to put Dre in his place.
55. What store do you shop at the most?
-Kroger lol
56. What new technology will transform the future?
-none of it, technology will be the future's downfall
57. What supply in your house is running low?
-patience
58. If you could be any nationality what would it be?
-uhhhhh..... Egyptian???
59. What is the most delightful word you can think of?
-fuck 🤷
60. What is your least favorite beverage?
-beer 😷😷
61. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
-if they have a nice beard
62. If you were stranded on a tropical island what 2 things would you want with you?
-fresh water and a fucking boat!
63. What is the first thing you notice about someone when you first meet?
-their vibe
64. If you where running for office what would your campaign slogan be?
-I know some of these words!
65. What was your favorite book growing up?
-The Napping House
66. What city in America should not be included on a map, why?
-Roanoke, Va. Because it's a piece of shit
67. What compliment does people give you the most?
-I have a beautiful smile
68. What word would you add to the dictionary if you could, what would it mean?
-shizzle dizzle fizzengarr it's a cool way to say "shit"
69. What product would you refuse to promote?
-Iphones
70. What is your favorite pet’s name?
-Zero, RIP Old man 😭
71. Use one word to describe your computer ability?
-proficient
72. If your plane was about to crash, who would you want sitting next to you?
-nobody, I wouldn't want someone I know to die with me
73. Which of the presidents was your favorite?
Obama
74. How long of a consecutive time have you spent in a car?
-5 hours
75. What is your favorite Halloween costume?
-when me and my oldest went as zombie nerds. It was our own "revenge of the nerds"
76. How can you tell if some one is a nerd?
-wtf kind of question is that?
77. If you could teach any grade or subject what would it be?
-kindergarten art
78. What fashion trend do you just not get?
-cowboy boots and dresses/skirts/shorts. Or fucking Crocks
79. If you where a wicked tyrant what country would you rule?
-France
80. What is the lowest grade you have ever been given what class was it for?
-like a 35 and it was probably chemistry or algebra
81. If you could choose your nickname what would it be?
-Rain
82. What is your best feature?
-my smile (when it's real)
83. If you could swim in any liquid what would it be and why?
-and not get hurt or die? Lava maybe? I think that'd be cool
84. What is the song you hear most often?
-Baby shark, Carl Poppa, Ew by Jimmy Fallon and Will.i.am, and Perm by Bruno Mars
85. What have you done that you are most proud of?
-divorced my ex. I got out of an emotionally abusive relationship and I'm raising my two daughters by myself
86. How many keys do you have on your key ring?
-4?
87. What is your favorite song?
-Peace sign/Index Down by Gym Class Heroes and Busta Rhymes
88. How old where you when you had the worst hair cut ever what style was it?
-I don't get hair cuts
89. What advice did you get that was the most rewarding?
-know your worth
90. If you could change one thing about your looks what would it be?
-grow 3 more inches
91. What is your least favorite type of music?
-country
92. If you where a super hero what would your powers be?
-shape shifting, mind reading, compulsion, and super strength
93. What fortune would you want to get from a fortune cookie?
-Your soul mate will find you within the month
94. What is one food you wouldn’t want to give up?
-burgers
95. If you won a million dollars what would you buy?
-a big house
96. If you had access to a time machine where and when would you go?
-whenever and wherever Woodstock was
97. If you could add a person to Mount Rushmore who would it be, why?
-Barack Obama
98. If you could win any award what would it be, why?
-I'm not sure to be honest
99. If you could teleport where would you go, why?
-to the bathroom because I need to pee right now but I don't want to move
100. What was your favorite cartoon growing up?
-Rugrats
1 note · View note
edelwary · 7 years ago
Note
when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.
REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS : 
TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part 
mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah : 
I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !
around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x) 
For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!
Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls). 
I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !! 
Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper) 
This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING. 
And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there. 
Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is
 HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW : 
I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why : 
You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3) 
You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved
It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong
Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones. 
Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.
I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage. 
You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you. 
Use. References. 
Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support. 
I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff ! 
Make it harder. 
No eraser. 
Paint. 
I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds. 
Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.
And if you make mistakes :
New page, restart
It’s okay
It’s for you
I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades 
You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit
Draw as large as you can 
There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines
Thin lineart helps
Thinner. Make it even thinner
Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art 
Big lineart ? Why not
Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty
Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think 
Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great. 
Don’t be afraid to do nothing
Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know… 
Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :
Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style
Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back
Take breaks. Breath. 
Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different
I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard 
But I really, really think it’s worth it 
MOTIVATION :
My main bitch 
I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-
Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work
Actual advices : 
I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later
Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic. 
Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.
Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf. 
Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool. 
Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT. 
Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry. 
Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more
Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF 
Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford 
MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol) 
Prompts blogs are cool too 
Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !
That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT
Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it
Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see. 
Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you. 
Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer 
Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it. 
FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one. 
Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them. 
WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!! 
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untieddiamond-blog · 6 years ago
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Daddies Girl
My parents use to always tell me stories about when I was younger I use to wait up for my dad to watch wresting with him, and I would get super excited whenever he came home with some snacks ready to break night with him. From what I can remember as a child, my dad has always been my go to. You know as a child you are so innocent and barley know right from wrong. My dad to me anyway was a super dad; you know the kind you see on TV. It wasn’t long until that changed though.
 *between ages 6-12
 I never understood why my father was so mean to my sister all the time, I knew she didn’t like him very much, but it was always because she was getting in trouble all the time, she lied all the time, she snuck out all the time, but then again, he never really let her do shit. So what would any normal teenager do? Exactly does it behind their parents back. I remember what it seem like every night he would cuss her out so bad like she was a bitch from the street. This one time she got caught by a family member talking to a GROWN ASS MAN, she however was only 16 at the time. You can only imagine the amount of trouble she got into.  At times I felt really bad for her, and at other times I didn’t. She was so mean to me ALL THE TIME, I was her punching bag. Who else was she going to take her anger out on? Not him, not my mother and most dainty not my 3 year old baby brother. So now I get it. I do. She finally got tired of his shit and got her shit together and off to college she went. Personally, that was the best thing she could have done. I don’t blame her.  But this isn’t about her, back to him.
 *When shit got real
 I ember like yesterday, It was my very first time going to a physiatrist, we talked about so much. She asked me what made me sad or made me cry and different things in that nature. After the visit was over, she diagnosed me with manic depression. At 13 years old wtf is that!? I came home that evening he asked my mom how my appointment went, she responded, “they diagnosed her with depression.”  His response was, “DEPRESSION?!? WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DEPRESSED ABOUT?” I think this is the day I started to look at him every different. He asked me very aggressively, but worried at the same time, “what are you depressed about??”  “YOU” was my response. After that day nothing was ever the same
    My sister was back home from college, if I can remember she was taking a break or something, anyway, I was in about 6th grade, I was always getting into fights (not my fought, I was highly bullied in school) close to the end of the school year mainly, my sister and a high school friend of hers deceived to stop by my school to talk to some of the students. A former teacher of hers, Ms. Carealot to be exact, told my sister she “heard rumors about me”, I was sneaking out of class to meet boys, some of the students heard I was sucking dick in the bathroom, oh here’s the best one, I WAS PREGNANT! Ha-ha. Pregnant, sucking dick in 6th grade, 11- 12 years old. But for whatever reason she felt the need to go to my dad and tell him. Little did I know some of the girls in 7 and 8th grade had plans to jump me after school, one of the mentors there got word and kept me after school? Only until the school yard was clear for me to walk home, to my surprise while walking home, guess who pulls up to the light and is cussing me out from the car. He was literally making a scene and told me to get the fuck in the car. I thought maybe I was in for staying late after school. But he didn’t give me any time to explain. We only live 2 minutes away from the school, it was a summer day and everyone is outside chilling on their porches and kids are playing. But of course has still yelling at me and making a scene and told me to go the fuck to my room. I was so scared; I didn’t know what I did or why he was yelling at me. Maybe 3 minutes later, he storms in my room and whooped my ass like he never did, oh yea WITH THE BELT. I had welps and bruises all over my body, shortly after my mom came to comfort me and then gave me details on why I got beat in the first place. I was livid that I got beat so bad over a lie my sister and a teacher made up! At this point I started to grow hate for my sister as well, I started to think maybe this was her way to pay me back. *The Next Day*
 I got ready for bed. Begging of June. I was still very pissed off from the day before. I was ready to release all my anger and hate. Around lunch time. My best friend pulled me to the side to warn me that the girls in her classroom were still planning to jump me after school. I was ready. It seem like time was growing slower by the minute. He took my phone the day prior, so my cousin, who picked me up from school every day couldn’t confirm with me that she wasn’t going to be able to pick me up that day. Finally I got tired of waiting for her, I picked my brother up from his gate and off we started to walk home. Half way home I realized the whole school was behind me. At this time I knew I had to put my big girl panties on and fight my battle. In the middle of getting jump by 6 or 7 girls the only person who tried to help me and jump in was my 6 year old baby brother!  Aint that some shit!  Some “friends” I had. I went home and let out all my hurt and I cried and cried. That’s all I was able to do! And guess who was there to comfort me? Mom.  I was still upset from the day before, and now at the fact of being jump, and to be honest I blamed him for everything. Oh yea, can you believe that bitch Ms.Caralot was behind all of that? So here I was not only being bullied and attacked physically and mentally at school, but at home as well. The only person I ever really had in my corner was my mom. Speaking about mom. That brings me to my next chapter.
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sunfish999 · 6 years ago
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if y’all ever wanted to know anything about me... i tried
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hm I’m bored (i say this as i should be doing geometry homework
1. read: probably the paladin prophecy, or the finisher (just books i’ve read like 500 times, idk about understanding but--) watch: the vampire diaries? (idk i watched the entire series in 7th grade wygonnad) or aquamarine movie? listen to: XYLO, LUME, more specifically Need Nothing by Verite 
2. bro i have no idea who they are actually but I’ve seen like 2 fanfic writers who write exactly like me and seem to think exactly like me i love that. also a reg writer? uh probably mark frost? i aspire to write like f scott fitzgerald but it never gonna happen hun (cos i wanna major in physics not literature lmao)
3. holy fuck lets pick like 3 fandoms, aight? uh first lets go w my hero academia? tokoyami ofc? next... percy jackson bich-- nico LMAO no maybe bianca? hm HARRY POTTER -- ginny prolly although i dont want to date harry (oops) The maze runner? tommy actually ;; naruto? fucKINH ROCK LEE BABE uhhhsdfhh star wars is anakin and voltron is lance (or pidge actually) i should stop buuuut yeao ok
4. i think my name is fine but i aint gonna share it here (also kinda wish my nickname was charly though thats all im gonna say ALSO yes laurel is a faux name yes 
5. human being because i do nothing. lol but yes i think that who i am as a person should be based off my actions, for it is how i act that shows other people who i am, not ‘who i am inside’ dont make fucking excuses for your actions people 
6. yea i believe in 1 god and i was raised as a catholic christian but i am accepting of all religions and views
7. i mean kinda??? idk im very polish and so i eat lotta polish food (gr8 stuff right there) but im just american so yea 
8. muscial artists, well bitch i only started actively listening to lots of music (aka spotify) like last year but i listened to ari grande when i was young ofc but i dont rlly feel connected to her. maybe like, adele? probably her yea 
9. yes i am a visual artist (preferred medium is watercolor) i looooove singing although i suck so i just do it for fun, i played the french horn for 2 years (also suck so not really lol) um i also write for fun and im good at writing informative essays (my school is big in the english program lol) i was also in 3 plays but i dislike theatre so no. also i like clothes i am a fashion artist wow
10. tf? idk? i have like 3 mottos: “if you want something done right, do it yourself” “the answer to existence is not why we are here, but how we affected others during our time here” “jack at all trades, master at none, better than a master at one “ “you don’t have to speak to be present” “consider how hard it is to change yourself and realize what little chance you have in trying to change others” “do the scary thing first, and get scared afterwards” “the very fact that you're actively looking for ways to become kinder, and attempting to understand your flaws and change them for the better is fair proof that you as a person, are kind.” OK YEA MAYBE I HAVE A CREED SO WHAT 
11. ideal day lol art, reading, and binge watching tv in bed while eating. otherwise spending the day meditating in a forest in spring where its warm but not too warm and just not speaking the entire day 
12. both. i have 3 cats and 2 dogs. love all of them dearly though i’d consider myself a human puppy vs a human kitty (im not a furry calm tf down)
13. outdoors, if you mean nature. if you just mean social activity, then indoors 
14. as i said before, i like singing even though i suck, in grade school i learned the ukelele, piano, and french horn. i remember none of that now 
15. influential books my ass. LETS GO: 1. into the wild (krakauer) 2. Fahrenheit 451 (cant remember author name but its fucking iconic and a classic and it made me think) 3. just gonna go an put harry potter because that shit changed my life 4. the hobbit? idk, iconic 5. i wanna read more literature-y books soon but whatever, i feel like i should say the great gatsby but honestly with writing my essay and everything i just dont give a shit anymore
16. ok i feel like if my parents werent as strict when i was younger id have less depression and be less stressed but then i would also care less about my grades and being kind and i like that about myself sooooo 
17. lol this is EXACTLY me guys because its fucking anonymous as hell because i know none of you (except for like 2 mutuals but ive never met them irl but they’re cool) i dont trust my friends. or family, for that matter
18. my patronus is a wolf thanks for asking; and my power animal: symbolizes instinct, intelligence, and an appetite for freedom. embody personal power and balance between self-control and animal instincts. a guide to inspire you to live more freely
19. im a gryffindor, i took the pottermore test twice and got it both times, also, i took it doing the opposite and got slytherin, so i aint them (but i love slytherin sooo)
20. fuck are you serious? honestly hogwarts would be awesome as hell but probably middle earth because it still got the magic but it gorgeous as hell 
21. yea i’d probably say i love easily since i like barely talk to my crushes and yet i think i really really like them because GODDAMN 
22. school. daydreaming. eating. phone. drawing. 
23. i feel like once i move out for college i’d like em a heck of a lot more, so probably like at least once a month? when i’m older? like at least once every 2 months? i love my extended fam though
24. oh fuck my friend from school and i fucking liked chinchillas when we were little, we always text each other the same thing at the same time, i always know what shes thinking and what the basis for her actions is. shes the bff that doesnt always act like it all the time 
25. fuck yes 
26. pansexual and PROUD but still in the closet except for the whole internet and 3 friends 
27. ok honestly i feel like i dress kinda like a basic girl just more minimalistic and modest but i kinda totally want the gays to recognize me and also i fucking want those patterned polos because hell to the yes. and also i want bangs but i do sports and i feel like id look ugly because everyone says they would (waiting til college, naturally) otherwise love my freckles and real dark eyes
28. honestly, probably like a 2-3. i don’t care SO much about what people think, but i’m fucking annoyed by really dumb things super easily. i’m just really good at hiding it so no one ever knows 
29. why music wtf OK: 1. need nothing - verite, 2. lover like me - off bloom 3. strapped - FOOL 
30. why the FUCK all my quotes are in my creed bitch lemme search :
“growing up is giving up” 
thanks for listening to my TED ED talk aaaaand i hope you know me a bit better and i hope i didn’t accidentally give away too much info and someone will come kill me ok BYE 
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