#wrote this ina haze on the bus and very nearly missed my stop

[lost-in-fandoms]

Max finds out about Josh's announcement from the gossip channel in the server he has with the redline boys.

He doesn't often go there, he doesn't really care, but he's on holiday and he's already bored, so he spends more time than usual fucking around on his phone and he ends up there.

The announcement is simple, cute, and normally Max would just move on, he doesn't care about Josh or his life, but...

But this makes his fingers tingle with the need to text Daniel. To ask how he is, how it happened, when the last thing Max knew was that Daniel was the one in Josh's bed.

He doesn't, both because it's none of his business and because he doesn't want to open their text thread just to see the last three messages he sent gone unanswered, Daniel leaving him on read, not even congratulating him on his championship.

And even worse, the ones above that, the picture Max had sent, baring himself in every sense of the word, offering his body and heart to Daniel, just for Daniel to say no. No, it's not right. No, it's too much. No, I don't want this.

Two days later, Max had seen the pictures, sent by Gianni with a question mark, of two men kissing at a party, not blurry enough to not be recognisable, Josh's big hand cradling Daniel's jaw.

And now Josh is engaged. The hurt curdles into anger in his stomach, making him feel vaguely sick.

He had always known Josh was stupid, but now he has the proof, because who, given the chance, would choose anyone over Daniel?

Or maybe he's still fucking Daniel, behind his pretty girlfriend's back.

Or maybe with her.

Max stands up, leaving the phone on the couch, and heads straight for the sim. He had promised not to get on it for a while, to call Victoria later, to just relax for a while, but he needs to shut his brain off right now, before it veers into too dangerous thoughts and he ends up doing something embarrassing, like crying.

When he emerges, nürburgring probably forever imprinted on his retinas, the house is dark and the cats are asking for his attention, hungry and disgruntled. He stumbles to the kitchen, feeling slightly dizzy and dehydrated, blurry around the edges, but no longer on edge as before.

He feeds the cats, grabs a bottle of water from the fridge, and then goes to look for his phone again, ready to face Victoria's wrath for missing their call.

He finds a bunch of notifications waiting for him, including two missed calls from Victoria, followed by several threats to his life if she finds out he was on the sim, but his eyes stop on two different messages which make the water feel like acid in his throat.

Hey Maxy, sorry I've been MIA you know how things go!

Is the offer still on the table?