#wowzers im so happi for you

[gumilac]

I HAVE SO MUCH TO TELL YOUUU;

so,,,,, im a COSPLAYER NOWWW!!!!!!!! today i actually just attended an event (just got home, rly exhausted) :DDD

ITS SO MUCH FUNNN AND I HAVE,,,,, A LOVING BF WHO SUPPORTS ME NOW!! WOWIE I GET BITCHES???? LMAOO and and and and im already working on a csm fic 🤯🤯 gonna post it sometime around this week bc,, im lazy BAHAHAHAHA BUT YEAHHH ITS BEEN GREAT AND IM HAPPY TO BE BACK!!!!

OH WOW!!! that's so amazingg, do you mind if i asked who you cosplay? waaah i'd love to know that's so exciting <33

OH WOW AGAIN–!! I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, I'M GLAD YOUR BF'S SUPPORTIVE!!! as he should be 😤 but, that's amazing,, ofc you pull bitches! HAHAHAHAH i mean you're vv sweet and who wouldn't love you

ooooo i haven't gotten around to watching csm but, i've heard it's good! so far who caught my eye is aki (people say he's like megumi 😳) i call him onion top tho HAHAHAHA

IT'S GREAT TO HAVE YOU BACK ON HERE,, glad life has been treating you well mwamwa!

[peachy-wolfhard]

dating yuta okkotsu

a/n: wowzers more than one post a year??? also HAPPY BDAY YUTA LUB U BABYBOY

Warnings: swearing, sims death, yuta gets elbowed accidentally, a little angst

Word Count: 823

My literal bf

He's so in love

Heart eyes whenever someone even slightly mentions you

Yuta will be talking to someone and if they slightly mention something you like he starts rambling about how amazing you are and how much he loves you while blushing and borderline giggling and kicking his feet

He's so sticky too like anything you do he's right there like a shadow

Yuta is also really quiet when he is being your shadow so 99% of the time he ends up scaring you when you turn around 

One time after a mission, you're nerves were still on edge and Yuta just happened to walk behind you and ended up getting an elbow to the eye (Rika beat ur ass sorry)

Yuta isn't that big of a gamer himself but he LOVES to watch you play the sims, especially if you made you and him

Speaking of the Sims ! Whenever Yuta is away for missions you always update him about what's going on

hi yu! Update ab our sims…OUR SON DIED HE DIED IN A FIRE IM SO SAD!!!!!! BUT ITS OK WE CAN MAKE A NEW ONE ;) wink wink anyway we moved to a farm and ITS HAUNTED. ok bye bye baby ilysm MWAH

VOICE MESSAGES!! Yuta can't get enough of them he loves sending them to you and he loves when you send them

yuta

“Hi honey, I just saw a really cute cat that reminded me of you. I swear it looked almost one hundred percent like you, not even joking…ok i gotta go bye i love you!”

Facetimes are another thing that is pretty regular. Its either you walking around campus showing him to all your friends or him show you around wherever he is

“Yuta, look at these freaks. They’re going crazy without you here…me too honestly”

“I know I'm losing my mind not being around you guys but especially you.”

Another thing he loves is sending random pictures to each other

*picture of yuta being cute* 

y/n

OMG IM SOBBING MWAH MWAH IM GONNA EAT U I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND

*picture of you doing something*

yuta

Cries sobs screams throws up I MISS UUUUUUUUUU <333333 :333

ONE LAST THING

Yuta barely uses emojis, he's an emoticon boy :3

He always brings you presents back from wherever they send him

There's always a big dramatic reunion when he returns. Running into each other's arms, fake loud crying, one of you carrying the other (translation: you carrying Yuta) …the works

Nights after he gets home are very chill. Ordering take out and watching reality tv while just enjoying each other's company. Ending the night by cuddling each other to sleep

Yuta has a note in his notes app of EVERYTHING you like and dislike

Everytime you slightly mention something you like or dislike he makes a mental note to write it down

Even if he doesn't write something down, he memorized it. Remembers what kind of candy you like, what your favorite flowers are, your orders from take out and restaurants

While your guys relationship is lovely and amazing it does get hard sometimes with Yuta always being gone and you having missions and school

Going days without hearing from the other because the two of you are so stressed and busy then having to update each other all at once in one message then repeating the process

Trying to facetime each other but when he's in an entirely different timezone it's hard. You'll be almost asleep and his day is just starting

After a while it started to get to you, that your boyfriend was away for so long, you weren't able to see him, and when you were you had to prepare for him to leave just a few weeks after

Even though you were surrounded by your friends and teachers that love you, you felt so lonely

Finally you talked to him about it, about how all his traveling made you feel so alone and he agreed with you. That he too felt so alone (because most of the time he was) and that he just wanted to stay home for at least a year

Loves snuggling with you but only in private (Maki beat his ass)

Holds you so close at night to the point it feels like he's trying to get into your skin

Seems like the type to either wear minimal clothes to bed or pajama sets, no in between

Kicks the blankets off then curls up to you when he inevitably gets cold

Yes he's very sweet but he still likes to mess with you ESPECIALLY at night

His favorite thing to do is putting his cold hands or feet on you and asking “are my feet/hands cold”

ONE LAST THING

He 100% gets you guys those Lego roses so you can build them together

Overall he very much loves you and cant get enough of you

[devotion-disorder]

First of all WOWZERS I LOVE YOUR ART AND YOUR BOYS!! I know he's an absolute creep but Kuuya is my FAVORITE kind of yandere sndndndbd Kuuya sir your hand in marriage NOW 😤😤👇🫴

Second of all I... Cannot draw... Not even to save my life. But I can write!! Would you be okay with some reader insert fanfic of your boys being written?? 🥺👉👈 (I have IDEAS for Kuuya specifically 🤤🤤🤤 but I can totally do something for Noel to be fair 💞💞) ALSO IT MAY TURN INTO SMUT BUT IM NOT SURE YET ID SEE WHERE THE FLOW TOOK ME IF YOURE COOL WITH THAT TOO!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

THANK UU!!!! You are so sweet asdhalwuidhawhk 🥺🥺💖 and if you look closely you'll see that actually kuuya has been holding YOUR hand for marriage before you even asked... so checkmate 😤😤😤

And yes! fanfics are welcome! be as clean or as nasty as you want! in fact im very happy that anyone would even go out of their way to make something of my silly boyes TwT

[girlbowser]

sorry for taking so long to get back to you (im the "wowzers" anon) but yes! i can totally scream your ear off about this!

you talking about the routes in this game being a metaphor for college and purposes in life reminds me of what playing pqr has meant for me personally. i first found this game when jade's route was still being worked on (the "anticlimatic" update specifically) and its really so strange to see how much of my life has changed. a couple days after i started playing pqr i realized that i was going to have to move and it basically uprooted my life (realization not brought on by pqr just happened to be at around the same time). most of my plans for how i wanted to spend my life, seeing my friends, my career paths, kinda felt like they got eviscerated because of stuff out of my control. but i just like. ignored it and didnt really think about it :) at least until the move happened and it all came crashing down. im sorta better now, but still going through it. and. just seeing jade talk to kanaya and talk about not knowing where to go next or who exactly you are now plus the jade theme music playing in the background that i had listened to constantly while playing, replaying, and rereplaying jade's route. actually made me want to bawl my eyes out (in like a good way though lol). this game is so special to me. its been one of the main things in my life right now thats been keeping me going through it all. i love to go back to it and replay it comparing the older routes to the newer routes and see what references i missed. everytime i play it, it feels like a find something new. and i think even years after now and even if homestuck becomes a smaller part of my life, this game is going to stick with me forever. thank you so so so much.

also, on a sillier note, what the heckadoodle do you mean the fucking hampsters movie was real? i was just like oh haha thats a silly idea! a hamsters movie with the hamster dance! such a funny and fake thing to have in a homestuck fangame! its like guy fieri being the antichrist or gushers being made by a genocidal fish! silly fictional stories making up silly fictional things!

but like i looked it up and its real??? its fucking real????? its a movie i can watch with my very own two eyeballs. apparently fucking saberspark made a video about it?????? huh??????

actually i just realized this is probably very congruous with homestuck. because i do not know how to convey the shock i felt when i was in a convenience store and found out that faygo was real. and then the further shock when i realized that tab was real after telling myself that SURELY at least one drink in homestuck was fictional.

im not sure if you meant to send this to @pesterquestrewritten or not but. holy fucking shit this is one of the sweetest asks ive ever gotten of all time????? jesus christ. oh my god.

i dont think i need to say it but pqr has been a very similar lifeline for ME as well. like, ive been dealing with some pretty schnasty depression since/before leaving school. and, like, working on pesterquest rewritten, HAVING that outlet, that creative place to put my energies, its been so vital for me. and then hearing that its been the same for my READERS????? crazy. crazy wild shit

speaking of older routes, i DID actually go back and add one thing to the rose typewriter ending in the prologue, it uses a new renpy feature that i'd been asking for for months hahaha

and also, if you have the technical knowhow and youre curious, feel free to dig around the internals and find the hidden beta for bonus route 3. im not gonna tell you to not play it lmao

aaa

yeah! yeah yeah yeah yeah. im incredibly happy my writing has resonated. and that the silly puppet show i put on next to my writing has also resonated. its. yeah. waow

wawowawoawoaowoaowaw.

fun fact about the hampsterdance movie. one time when i was in high school i had a professor who was like "yeah i composed music for hampsterdance." and i was like ???? okay man. sure. because at the time that movie was lost media and nobody knew it existed. so i had no fuckin clue what that guy was talking about.

of course YEARS later it turns out that the movie DOES exist. and i looked up the credits and i dont THINK i see his name there? but its probably what hes talking about. if it isnt what hes talking about i have less of a fucking clue than anything at this point lmao

pqr likes to reference my other works a lot! for example, the chatroom called "the nexus" first appeared here, in my first published fic that was textually about ultaradia. youll sometimes find quotes or phrasing that match whatever other fanfic i was writing at the time, or, i mean, obviously, you've got the entire A Bed of Roses section, which USED to be a tribute to my longest work, and now is only a neat reference to my second-longest work. god damn, did pesterquest rewritten ever grow out of proportion lmao

yeah. i think the main thing is that i really could never have gotten as far as i did with pqr without my friends and creative collaborators, who have encouraged me forever one thousand years. pqr is a game about friendship, obviously, but the friendships that were integral in the CREATION of the game are even more important to me than the virtual ones tbh. i love everyone whos in the credits of the game very dearly

thank u all :,)

and thank u for reading and enjoying!!! i'll try and put out more for the kanayaroute bad end tonight :D

[spitinsideme]

hi hi. soery thag I haven't been rebloggin andtagging as much recentlt. been really off for the past couple weeks. just wanted to say i still check your blog all the time and see the gals and tgo wOag awOoGa wowzers and feel a bitr better . you're doing really good!!! glad to see wso many more people finding your art. ah hope you're doin well

p.s. you,re a gosh darn poet for wtriting thar trolls delta thirst post. you madr me realise i have .uch training to do if i am become as powefrul as you

p.s.p.s i really like the demon x nun au drawing where ragatha askds pomni why she loves her. that wad very crunchy and gay of u

i literally like cherish you so muxh you havr no idea you donr need to apoligise for anything yoire perfecr and i just hope you will feel better !!! im glad my silly little gay art can make you feel betterbthat is all i do this for but honestly i cannot say this enough and more genuinily when i say that i am literally like .. i lovebyou so much i honeskly look flraard to seeing you reblog my posts at this point im posting art and just going yay !!hooe they see detaia sees its soon 💪💪 becahse yourlittle tags in the reblogs make me so happy

the kep to that delta rroll post was honestly just being horny and god was i holding back i had this whole segment on dildos that woulf have expanded everyrhnf anf i chose to go no ... too much ... not yet ... andbalso i really like the little poem thingd you put in the tags i alwyas read them and go !! so poetic !!!

im glad you liked that littlw srt piec3, i did my best 💪💪 glad to see you enjlyed it ❤️

[irisxstardust]

1 | Shut Up

SUMMARY: You and Ellie used to be friends until one day when she decided she was done. You hadn't spoken to her since and now, five years later, you are given the unfortunate task of going on patrol with the girl. A little argument and one stalker later, you're playing her hero. But is it enough to repair the damage made to your relationship all those years ago?

A/N: wowzers. ive spent like two weeks going back and forth on this piece bc UGH i want to get into the cutie stuff but i like want that angst and slow burn yk. and i also want it to be good like this is my first real tumblr post and yall are such good writers ive got a lotta standards to meet. ugh pls tell me its not boring i dont want it to be boring since its not fluff. anyway there will be more but im not sure how fast ill be able to write it. i like really dk how many more parts i could make of this ngl like i just wanna make a happy amazing pt 2 where reader and ellie just like live happily ever after. also this is my first time writing in second person so pls give me grace if its bad lmfao. love you🫶🏻

CW: cursing, angst?/slow burn, fem!reader (she/her), CAT (🤮🤧😵‍💫)

WC: 3,688

You didn’t hate Ellie Williams, not in the slightest.

In fact, when you first met the girl you were impressed by her nonchalant attitude and how quickly she adjusted to life in Jackson. You admired the bond she shared with her companion, Joel - the closeness they shared, the softness of his voice when he spoke to her, the glint in her eyes when she looked at him. That didn’t mean you missed the way she stared off distantly in her free time, or the way she would talk to others with a certain tiredness in her voice; but it wasn’t like you could talk to her about it.

You weren’t friends with her. Well, not anymore.

Ellie and you were friends when she first arrived, you made sure of it. You were always bringing her things to make the adjustment easier: blankets, sweaters, new socks, ammunition, and a new hairbrush, among other things. She was grateful for it at first, always thanking you, hunting you down for movie nights, and inviting you over for dinner with Joel. But at some point you messed up - you did something wrong.

She slowly began to ignore you, she started returning your home-baked goods and stopped inviting you to her house to watch movies. She started to talk to you just as cold as she talked to the others. She didn’t like you anymore.

Eventually, probably tired of your haphazard attempts to fix your friendship, she snapped. You left her house in tears that day with your head down, shoulders hunched and wobbly, trying to cover the tear streaks with your hair.

Ever since you’d tried to ignore her, her words, and the wounds they made. It was hard when she consumed your every waking thought. You thought about Ellie all the time - what you did wrong, the way her hair bounced as she walked, what you said to make her hate you, that one time at dinner she accidentally choked on water and spit it out her nose, the look in her eyes as she yelled in your face, all of the science stuff she had hidden away in every crevice of her room.

Every thought you had about Ellie contradicted the other and it was all so confusing that every time you thought too hard about it your head spun.

So you quickly found yourself doing simple, menial tasks to keep your thoughts at bay. You were picking up every patrol you were allowed, volunteering at the daycare to help your mom care for the kiddos, spending any and all free time at your friends houses instead of yours. You always finished your house chores early in the morning, always walked your neighbors dog once before noon and once after, always doing whatever you could to stay out of your own mind.

So you forgot about Ellie - as best as you could, at least.

It almost worked, too. Five years you got away with it, hiding from your mind and from Ellie. Until today, the one day you had been dreading for years. The day you knew was coming.

You were partnered with Ellie for patrol.

At first, you'd spent the first three hours complaining to your friends - Jesse mostly ignored you, only cracking jokes here or there, and Dina just didn't understand why you hated Ellie so bad. Eventually you just gave in and stopped complaining, finding some solace under the heavy duvet on your bed.

Before Dina left your home she gave you a warm smile and said, "You're gonna do great." And then left you to your own devices, not realizing she was leaving you to rot in your own brain.

When the time came to get up and get ready, you found yourself picking through your clothes, trying to find the cleanest shirt to wear and the pants that fit you the best. You wanted to look nice, most people would, but you weren't sure if it was for you or for her.

You walked nervously towards the stables, taking firm, heavy breaths as you shoved your hands into your jacket pockets.

"It'll be okay... It'll be okay," you chanted the words under your breath as you neared the stables, clenching and unclenching your sweaty fists.

When you arrived, Ellie was already leading Shimmer along to the exit, hardly glancing at you.

"You're late." She said, sucking on her teeth.

You nodded slowly, inhaling sharply, "I am aware..." speaking slowly and cautiously, trying not to poke the bear. "I kind of have my own stuff, though," the pitch of your voice raised slightly, as if you were unsure of your own words, "so I got here as fast as I could."

She scoffed, her head shaking slightly which sends her short strands of hair bouncing around her ears. "Just get the fucking horse."

You walked off hastily, unfurling Japan's reigns - when Dina didn't take him out, you did, because you both liked to make sure he had enough exercise everyday. You walked him down to meet Ellie at the gate.

Ellie was standing on one foot, shifting her weight every now and then and rubbing her palms down the length of her thighs; almost as if she was rubbing something off of them. She rubbed her thumbs on Shimmer's reigns nervously, head darting back and forth to see if you were close or not.

When you came into her line of sight, she hardened up and stood taller. Her face sharpened and her eyes filled with the same distance that kept you up at night, though today they also harbored another emotion, one you were no longer privy with.

It filled you with a sense of confusion and dread, causing you to mumble incoherently under your breath.

"Fucking Williams... cold as shit... pain in my ass..." you muttered as you mounted your horse.

Giving you one last weary look, Ellie also mounted her horse. She pulled her fingers through her hair, tucking it back behind her ear as the two of you left Jackson.

The horses trotted slowly, easily stepping over the tree roots in the ground as if they had the whole route memorized.

For you, this was one of the few routes you hardly visited. It wasn't too far from Jackson, but it was just far enough that you knew it'd take up the rest of your day.

As your eyes danced between the trail ahead of you and Ellie beside you, you didn't know what to think.

Sure, you'd thought of all the ways you would yell at her and all the things you'd say if you ever got the chance again; but you'd also thought of all the ways you'd make it up to her, all the things you wanted to say to let her know you weren't the same person you used to be.

What did it matter, anyway?

You were stuck here, letting your old wounds sit and fester in the bitterness of it all. You were stuck here, next to her but unable to fill the empty silence with words. You were stuck here, on patrol with the one person who hates your guts and you couldn't do anything about it.

"It's not polite to stare, you know."

Her voice echoed through the dense trees, bouncing off branches and leaves only to worm its way back into your brain.

"I'm sorry?" you hummed, caught off guard by the sound.

Her head slightly turned in your direction and Shimmer slowed down to a light trot, matching Japan's speed. "It's not polite to stare."

Her words were much sharper the second time around, with much more emphasis placed upon them.

She's angry. Amazing. You scoffed to yourself, trying to keep hold of your composure.

"I wasn't staring..." you paused. You almost said her name, but the word caught in your throat. "At you. I wasn't staring at you."

She glanced at you sideways before she continued, "you were."

"Was not!"

"Were too."

"I wasn't staring-!"

There it was again. You'd almost said her name, but it got caught in the back of your throat, which left you to haphazardly cut off your sentence and leave her hanging, waiting for it.

She scoffed. "Yes, you were."

You closed your mouth and pressed your lips into a line, "I wasn't fucking staring at you, Williams."

"So you stare at me, deny it when I tell you it's impolite, and then can't even use my name?" She stopped her horse, leaning back in the saddle as she spoke.

And the words get caught in your throat. Your mouth dried as you slowed your own horse.

"I used your name," you whispered, blinking away the wetness in your eyes.

She laughed sourly, pulled on Shimmer's reigns and began to trot ahead of you again.

You sighed at the bitterness brewing in the pit of your stomach. You certainly fucked that up - but was it entirely your fault? Surely some of that had to go to Ellie too - I mean she's the one who broke off your friendship... she's the one who yelled at you for "staring." You weren't staring in the first place... right?

You began to question yourself, yet again, as Ellie spoke up once more.

"You're still staring."

And suddenly it's almost as if you could hear the smirk she had on her face.

"Could you fucking not? Please? I'm just trying to get to the tower and go home alive. I don't want to deal with this bullshit too."

"Stop fucking staring then," she whipped around to face you. "I definitely didn't ask for this either, so stop being a baby and get over it."

You clenched your fists and brought one to your face, rubbing your eyes with your palm.

"I'm not staring at you, El-"

You stopped talking after you finally looked directly into her eyes, catching sight movement behind her.

She began to scoff but suddenly stopped as your face changed.

"What?"

"Shut up."

You tilted your head to the side, narrowing your eyes as you focused on a shadowy figure hidden in the trees.

The figure stilled under a long branch, the leaves creating long shadows which warped around the curves of the figure.

Slowly, you reached for the pistol strapped to your thigh. Ellie's face scrunched in a mix of confusion and worry.

"Don't," you breathed, "move."

At the sound of your sharp exhale the figure screeched and aimed for Ellie, its dark eyes fixated on her.

You brought the gun up, aiming and pulling the trigger as fast as you could, but the stalker was hardly affected by the single bullet.

Ellie whipped around, yelping once before the stalker jumped on her and yanked her off of Shimmer. The stalker pinned her to the ground, its teeth already bared and ready to bite.

You pulled the trigger again. And again. And again. Until eventually the stalker slumped down above Ellie.

She pushed it off and brought herself to her feet, head whipping around to look for others.

"Do you see any more?" you asked as you scanned the area.

She shook her head, "I don't think so... holy shit."

You both sat quietly for a moment as you tried to process what just happened.

"Thanks- thanks for uh, for that," she panted, mounting Shimmer again and looking around, "that was close."

For a moment you were rendered speechless, trying to piece the puzzle back together in your brain before responding. "Yeah... of course," you paused, adding lightly, "s'what friends do." It came out a little mumbled but you knew she heard it.

You didn't keep your eyes on hers long enough to gauge her reaction, but you figured it was one full of something negative. You looked up one last time and caught her eyes, the strangest look on her face, before turning back down and looking away.

"The tower's just up that way," you hesitated, waiting for her to say - or do - something. To do anything. But she didn't, so you continued, "there shouldn't be any more in the area, they just cleared it last week."

You shifted on the saddle, cringing slightly, urging Japan to move forward again.

The rest of your route went okay - you didn't encounter anymore infected and the area is mostly barren anyway so you didn't find anything worthwhile. The tower was cleared already, too, so you and Ellie mostly found solace in your own thoughts for the rest of the route.

She didn't mention the staring thing again, opting to keep quiet instead, but you could feel her eyes meeting the side of your head every now and then.

You didn't say anything to her as you re-entered Jackson, walking side by side to the stables to put the horses back.

Ellie was brushing out Shimmer's mane as she opened her mouth to speak, "hey, thanks for earlier. Seriously. It means a lot."

You nodded, "no worries," and you paused, unsure of what to say next. Before you could, Ellie spoke up again.

"And sorry, by the way," she said, eyes darting around the stables, "for being mean."

At that, you found yourself completely dumbfounded, eyes wide, staring across the stables at her. And before you had the chance to recover from the shock she was flying out of the stables, probably heading back to Joel's house.

Within the next four minutes you'd rushed to Dina's, tripping and stumbling over your own feet, heart pounding and mind racing.

"She apologized?" Dina asked incredulously, eyebrows raised and lips turned downward, "for real?"

You shrugged, "I guess. I can't believe it either."

"Yeah, dude, she hated you for years but you play hero once and now she likes you again?" Jesse laughed, shaking his head, "bullshit."

"I never said she liked me again, Jesse. I was just telling you what happened. She apologized. That's what happened."

"Maybe she realized you aren't that bad," Dina smiled.

"Oh thanks, Dee, I'm honored."

Dina chuckled, leaning towards you and smacking your shoulder playfully, "and it's about time."

You paused, chewing on your lip as you thought of the day's events over and over and over again.

"I hope this is a new beginning for you guys, you deserve it."

You stopped your thinking, pulling yourself out of your thoughts to respond with a smile, "thanks, Dee."

"So, now that that's out of the way," Dina smiled suggestively, narrowing her eyes and raising her eyebrows, "you want to come to the bar with us later? Everyone's gonna be there."

You couldn't miss the suggestive tone in her voice, the way it dropped a pitch and she gained a mischievous glint in her eyes.

You hummed, "are they? Good for them."

Dina sighed exhaustedly, "c'mon! You never come with us! It'll be so much fun, I promise!"

"I don't know, Dina. You know I'm not one for parties."

"Well, you are tonight," she tapped the palm of her hand against the table, "because you are coming with me and we are going to dance all night and have so much fun. So much so, in fact, that you're going to completely forget how much you hate parties!"

"Oh, is that right?" You smiled as you began to chuckle.

She hummed, a particularly big grin splattered on her face.

"Yeah, your new best friend might be there too," Jesse added, which earned a nasty look from you and a disapproving look from Dina.

"Shut up!" Dina shouted, turning her attention to Jesse - which only threw you right back into your own head.

After Dina snapped you out of it, and after a lot more begging and pleading on her part, you agreed. It couldn't be that bad - right?

The party was nothing short of what you'd expected.

It was loud, crammed, kind of smelly, and definitely not the place you wanted to be spending your time.

But every time you caught Dina's eyes or you looked over in her direction, the smile on her face was enough to make you feel so deeply guilty that you stayed put. You stayed with her if she brought you out to dance and you stayed with her if she brought you to the bar to get a new drink.

It wasn't a surprise when you noticed Ellie at the bar, nursing a cold cup, staring at you with a conflicting expression. It also wasn't a surprise when Dina grabbed your hand and started dragging you in her direction, giving you one last reassuring smile.

It was a surprise, however, when Ellie greeted Dina with a hug and you with a smile.

She smiled at you.

Completely unable to quickly recover, you let Dina do the talking, trying to calm your racing heart.

"Hey, El! How're you doing?" she had to shout over the music but you knew Ellie could hear her - everyone could hear Dina.

"Pretty good! You okay?"

They began to exchange pleasantries and all the usual small talk, so you spaced out for a moment, waiting for the moment Dina would pull you away again. That moment didn't come, however, because Dina ran off without you.

"Wait - where's she going?" you yelled, eyes finally meeting Ellie's.

"Said she was gonna grab Jesse," Ellie began, eyes scanning over your outfit. "You want a drink?"

You hesitated, thinking over what happened during patrol. You lost yourself, again, and began mulling over what you could say and how she would possibly respond.

But then you began speaking, your mind not caught up yet.

"Sure!"

Ellie's face relaxed a little, and she waved you over towards a quieter area of the bar. The flannel tucked up to her elbows showcased the way her muscles flexed as she signaled Seth over to your side of the bar.

"You doing okay?" You asked as Seth walked away. "It just... looked like that stalker shook you up a bit."

She nodded, "Yeah, yeah. It was a little," she shrugged and let out a mangled noise, "nerve wracking." You both laughed.

Seth dropped your drink in front of you, giving you a sideways glance before returning to the packed end of the bar.

"You know how it goes, though," she finished. "I'm good."

"Well, that is certainly a plus."

Her lips tugged into a small grin, making you mirror the expression.

"Thanks again, by the way."

"Hey, we were partners. It was my job to have your back."

You both laughed again.

And you fell back into it. Into that easy-going, comfortable rhythm you had with her so many years ago. It was like no time had passed at all; like you were fourteen again.

And even when Dina came back she didn't hide it. You were finally able to openly talk to your two friends together again. It was like a dream.

"Hey, Ellie!" No. "I haven't seen you in forever!" No. "You look so good!" No.

"Oh! Hey, Cat!"

No.

You could almost taste the tension that had suddenly built up around the three of you; the sudden change in the air sending your head reeling and heart pounding.

Ellie and Cat exchanged pleasantries (not like you were interested or anything) as you suddenly honed in on a weirdly shaped ice cube in your drink. Poking at it with your straw, you waited for Cat to leave, holding your breath.

And in less than five minutes, you fell out of it.

You fell out of your rhythm, Ellie already ten beats ahead of you while you seemed to have changed rhythms completely.

When Cat did (finally) leave you let out a shaky breath, watching as even Ellie noticed the shift in you.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly, mostly directing the apology to Dina. She turned to face Dina straight on now, no longer moving her eyes between the two of you.

"You're fine," Dina brushed it off quickly, seemingly unaware of the sudden awkwardness.

"I should uh... go anyway. Joel's waiting for me, so... you know."

"Oh, yeah, sure. We should go soon too," Dina draped an arm around your shoulders, "I have kept someone here for way too long. She's getting a little antsy." She gave you a pointed smile, a teasing tone lacing her voice.

Ellie gave Dina a half-hearted chuckle before standing and hugging her. She gave you a very awkward, sideways, one armed hug before turning around and almost running out of the building.

"You want to go now or wait a little-"

"Can we go, Dina?" you rushed, clenching your eyes shut as you rubbed the balls of your palms into your eyes. "I'm just... really tired."

Dina stared at your face, her eyes scanning yours, for an extra beat before nodding, "Yeah, of course."

At home you spent the rest of your night hiding under your duvet, pulling at large chunks of your hair with your fists, digging your heels into your bed; all the way until you finished the night tiredly blinking away tears and chewing at your lips.

It was all so confusing. One minute you're dreading even looking at her and the next you're talking and laughing with her like you're best friends - and then? Then you're sitting there like the two of you never started talking again at all, all because Ellie said hi to an old friend.

One minute she's talking to you, then the next she's talking to you through Dina.

You woke in the morning with blood dried on your lips and dark bags under your eyes. You found it hard to keep your eyes open as you brushed your teeth, and one look in the mirror showed that you were in no state to leave your home anytime soon.

Your parents left quickly for work, not giving you a second glance even as you asked them to clear your schedule for the day.

Around noon you received a familiar knock at the door, and when you opened it you saw a face that hadn't graced your porch in a few years.

"Hey, Ellie," you paused, panicking internally. "What's up?"

"Do you want to talk?"

[chuchuminn]

just realized its been really really long since i posted (so sorry for being rlly lazy some stuff happened)

new content!!!!!

what if aruji sama was a DEMON??

smth ive been thinking abt!

im gonna come up with smth like whtever

name = ELENORA STEINE (nora, but none are her real name *its actually ____*

age = VERY OLD.

height = might be crazy... 6'2

facts abt nora:

- very bad memory (no she wont remember where her fork from dining went after going to the bathroom but its ok bc shes a grandma /j)

- came from germany (has a slight german accent wowzers)

- doesnt rlly like sweet but likes sweet if theyre not too sweet...??

- though rlly follows the main story of living in the modern world she just moved in recently 😔

- physically, magically, and mentally capable of murdering someone (any weapon works they should just be dead)

- if shes angry at you kill her or youre the one killed!!! waa waa waa. waa waa waa waa.

buh buh backstory!!! before butlers stuff

-----------

Back when DEMONS, HUMANS, and ANGELS still thrived..

"Is there really such a thing as a war anyway? That would never happen."

Nora says, looking at her two best friends, Kium (ANGEL) and Leon (HUMAN).

"Maybe! Theres a chance, y'know?"

Leon says in a cheerful tone, as Kium speaks up.

"I guess there's a chance as well."

"Anyway, aren't you hungry? We've been sitting in this tavern for a while."

All three nod and go get some food.

---------------

BANG!

Rings the sound of crashes and falling debris, scattering on what was once called the Human territory. Nora, Kium, and Leon were all called back to their own races. One thing was sure. It was war. Noone knew why but the lords of all three races. The three friends were all worried for each other.

They were all on the battlefield as well.

CLANG! CLANG!

The sound of swords clashing rang in Nora's ears. Whooshing of magic from demonic mages and angelic powers fly around.

"Oh, curses.. Why do I have to be doing this..- Leon..?!"

Nora sees Leon, collapsed on the ground. He's.. dead. Someone killed him.

"....Isn't this normal, though? Everyone would die someday."

*Kium says, facing Nora. He has tears running down his face, and he points a spear at you.*

"I have to do this, Nora. I'm so sorry.."

*He tried plunging his spear in Nora's body, but she managed to stop him in time, holding the blade. It couldn't be stopped anyway. Bound to be. She threw the double edged spear at Kium, killing him.*

"It's normal.. Right? Normal. Totally normal.."

*Nora fell down om her knees, and sobbed for a while. She returned back after war was over, and spent life until the modern world.*

--------------

butlers stuff abt NORA time!! (the story was rushed i am sorry)

Berrien:

☆ would love to learn her favorite snacks for tea time!!

☆ when shes sick (its possible ok.) he gives her Tea. (tea tea tea tea im like tea tea ooh just like tea tea ooh)

Lono

☆ he will make every single food she wants no matter the time because when shes rlly hungry she walks around to eat something that is probably edible for demons but not for humans

☆ knows all her favorite foods (hmm, let me guess.. nora's fav food is... Meat)

Bastien

☆ woodcarves her favorite things for her (maybe not a whole house but yeah) mistakenly sleeps in her room if he ever changes her bed (beds, right?)

☆ she teaches him sometimes for fighting stuff but again shes old. her bones are becoming nonexistent. every step you hear some cracking (/j)

Haures

☆ tries his very very best to cook for her (spoiler: it lit the kitchen on fire)

☆ decorated the garden with a lot of stuff because nora said she likes them at a really random time (eg: haures, i like ___.)

Fennesz

☆ reads books with nora then nora starts telling him about what happened during the old times when demons and angels had coexisted

☆ sometimes lifts weights with her because she got a bit bored of standing around (wants her muscles a lot)

Boschi

☆ nora asked him to put a giant pating in her room and it went on the ceiling but nora is happy because its still there (its kinda scary)

☆ flower arranging with boschi time every weekend even though nora gets headaches from them

Ammon

☆ when nora saw THAT scene (spoiler warning: the whip thing) she felt pretty bad for him and wanted to explode his mom

☆ constantly reminds nora not to touch the roses even though it won't hurt that much because he still doesn't want to see her hurt

Lucas

☆ scolds her because she doesn't yap when shes bored but actually runs around and ends up getting hurt

☆ wine lovers (theyre drunkards but nora has more tolerance than lucas because she had drinking competitions before)

Lamli

☆ one time nora ate a red mushroom because of hunger and became as silly as lamli

☆ lamli likes playing with frogs but nora would like to dissect them because its interesting

Nac

☆ nora doesnt understand nac and doesnt know why (his way of words make her brain become water)

☆ scolds her a lot for drinking lots of alcohol because he normally finds her throwing up

Miyaji

☆ doctor also, so... also scolds her with lucas for getting hurt a lot (only thing they can agree on)

☆ nora ate his cooking once after drinking the day before and started vomiting a lot (new rule: never let nora eat spicy after drinking)

Lato

☆ braids her hair but it kinda became a big mess but its fine because nora fell asleep

☆ other than miyaji and flure nora is the only one he likes + nora isnt very scared of him just thinks hes silly

Flure

☆ designed a lot of noras clothes because she really doesnt have that many

☆ nora tried sewing clothes with him once and it turned out pretty good but she stabbed herself a ton

Yuuhan

☆ sparred with her once, stopped because she had a stomach ache in the middle (he will try again)

Hanamaru

☆ talks abt his kids a lot to her and she listens while drinking green tea

Teddy

☆ kinda stalks her and has all her information in his notebook

conclusion....

sorry abt less content for villa butlers bc im not rlly familiar with them 😗

planning on making a new au sooner or later when i have time

thankz so much for reading all this pooks

[flwoie]

please read!!

helloo. i don't announce stuff like this because 1. i keep my words to myself and 2. the majority of my audience are engenes. however i just want to say that i no longer want to write for enhypen (after almost two years of writing for them wowzer). i have no hate against the group itself but i've only been a casual listener of kpop and the only groups ive been keeping up with are my ults (loona, svt, and &team) so im not following enhypen content lately and i don't know what their current personalities are like so i'm writing with what i remember.

however, it's mainly due to the community. ever since joining enhablr, despite all the nice people ive seen with, most of it was just filled with drama and it was just a toxic environment. although i was never involved in situations that happened, i see others getting involved when they haven't done anything wrong and it always pained me to see them go through that. i hate having to bring these situations up, but since last year, i've seen stuff like sexualizing idols and minors, doxxing minors as well, hating on others because of their age, encouraging racism, and a lot more deep stuff. stuff like this still surface on the community and it just disgusts me.

you might be wondering why i can't just keep writing for them but not interact, and that's impossible for me since tumblr is all about interacting with others as a writer (meaning talking to readers, supporting other writers, etc etc). in other terms, i'd have to include myself in the community either way which is the last thing i want.

plus staying longer in a community like this killed my excitement and motivation to write for them because what was the point in satisfying them when I couldn't get the same feeling in return. call me petty, selfish, or whatever horrible things you can say about me, i don't care and i will never apologize for speaking the truth. you have ruined the happiness of not only me, but for writers and readers in this community.

i am not discussing this for myself, or to cause some sort of dramatic leave, but im doing this for the ones who are afraid to speak about this issue and for the ones who are not aware. and before someone calls me out and says i'm a part of the toxic side of enhablr, i have never once started drama or been involved in one and most of the time i was inactive or went on other sides of tumblr (because if you haven't noticed, the last time i wrote for enhypen was back in december, excluding love in disguise).

if you feel offended by my words, maybe it's cause you're the one who's engaging in the toxicity, so feel free to block me or unmoot me, i don't tolerate this behaviour on my blog. i'm not saying ALL parts of enhablr is toxic but if you want to make a community be seen in a good light, start by being aware of what your peers like and dislike and put consideration into how they feel, because at the end of the day, we're all just imperfect humans living life. so please, learn how to be a better person for yourself and others.

after i finish love in disguise, it will be the last time i'll ever be seen in and want to see enhablr.

[applesjuice]

How will the reunion between Akari and Juliana go? Or Carmine?

So this is like, two years post Indigo Disk at this point. Carmine is about 19 here, and Juliana/Florian as being 17 and Kieran as 16 here.

Carmine travels for her job, she works with researchers as a sort if body guard against wild pokemon in dangerous areas they're studying. Pretty much what she did with Briar as a student. So she is out of the region when Akari gets reverse eebied back. They're staying with Drayden in Opelucid City, since Ingo is staying there too (and Emmet he's not going anywhere). After Carmine finally finds out what's up from Drayton she demands to facetime immediately to see Kieran.

Akari vaguely remembers her, their memories are sort of coming back. They just feel kind of seperared from them. Staring at the face of god kind of scrambles your brain.

So they initially reunite over facetime but it's not exactly a coherant conversation on Carmine's end. She's too busy bawling so Drayton winds up having to have a private conversation with her about the situation. After that she drops everything calls her grandparents to tell them whats up and then THAT'S it's own situation becauase poor grandma thought she was having a stroke when they heard the news.

When she gets back to Unova and finally sees Kieran in person she's bawling again and appologizing to them like Drayton did so Akari is finally like why does everyone keep apologizing to me? I dont get it. So then she's even more upset lol. But Akari really matured in Hisui and does kind of remember a big sister so there super happy someone they're related to actually wants them. (Akari went through a phase where their memories of indigo disk era had them thinking they were a terrible person and everyone back home was better off without them)

She also has a few of Kieran's pokemon on her like Furret and Hydrapple and they are very emotional seeing Kieran again. It takes her a few days because she's so overwhelmed but she eventually reaches out to Briar and the Protagonist to let them know Kieran's alive.

Im just gonna use Juliana in this to make it easier, but Juliana is shook. Like she's moved on with her life, mourned Kieran, still has nightmares about the incident. Kieran is the ghost that haunts her. So she's beside herself too and Carmine gives her time. She tells her friends who like, all vaguely know Kieran through osmosis since the whole thing kind of broke her, and they help her work through what she's feeling. Same with her mom, her mom keeps a picture of Kieran in their house even though she never knew them. But like the fact that this kid died and her own kid almost did too is pretty devastating to think about.

So Juliana facetimes Carmine and Carmine shows her Kieran (they don't talk yet, the whole situation is a lot for these two) and she starts crying too lol. She's like "do you think he'd want to talk to me?" And carmine is like "well, they've changed a lot but its more like. Theyre back to their old self just, more sure seeming? Also i honestly dont know if they remember you"

So its a whole shitshow essentially. Just a bunch of people navigating a difficult situation. Akari is kind of facinated by Juliana like "wowzers i was friends with someone so cool? I cant believe i was so mean to her i should appologize" and theyre like kieran i think sort of dying kind of negates that you're fine.

Then comes the big bomb that Akari has a SMART PHONE. That is the biggest change of all. Cannot believe you went to the past and came back with knowledge of memes.

Eventually the two talk and they're like pen pals for a while (through texting) while Kieran is healing and doing rehab for some injuries in Opelucid. Carmine is staying in an air bnb there to help out. Eventually Juliana gets the courage to come visit and when they meet she's half crying in joy half having a bi panic because Akari is very pretty.

The end

[nerves-nebula]

Not to be abnormal but the art you added for the commissions post with Don and Abe. Gee Whillikers. Goodness Gracious. Wowzers. Holy Guacamole AND Chips. What in the Sardines. you color very pretty (if you don’t mind me asking what’s ur process??)

it was an abe and donnie post first fdsfds i just added the commission stuff cuz i need money so bad-

but thank you!!! uhh the process really depends on the art piece since theres a lotta way things can go, but for this one here's a quick breakdown

first I doodles some thumbnails and wrote down the main colors I'd use (red & green)

i made a really rough sketch and then went over it on another layer. i dont really do line art so its more like a refined sketch tbh

then i blocked in the base colors and figured out the lighting, adding those in big blocks as well in a different layer

this piece is more painterly than i usually go for and i kinda wanted to honor that, so once i was sure about the base colors and the lighting colors, I merged them all together and kept refining the specific shapes.

Then once i was happy with that, I merged THAT layer with a copy of the lines so that I could treat it all like one big painting layer

the background actually came about last and after i made it I didn't like the colors I'd chosen, so i fucked around with some blending layers until I got it looking the way I wanted it to. here's the original background (left) with the edited one (right)

for a finishing touch i just added a paper texture and set it to multiply. i like adding textures i just usually forget to do it unless the texture is a brush im using

this isn't my usual process, but tbh i dont really make finished pieces all that much these days. i mostly just do like, sketch comics & shit.

but yeah i dont have one process so much as a bunch of ways that i could potentially do it, which I then pick and choose from as I desire. i almost always start with a thumbnail/pre sketch these days though.

[shaycowboy]

WOWZERS WHAT A FUN NIGHT

the person responsible for me realizing objectum is a thing and i could choose to be a computer FOLLOWED ME?? (hi omg computer handshake) 2. my partner just reblogged some computer stuff and im like "heehee you love me so much im so happy" 3. i rewatched my favorite new movie and rambled sooooo sosoooo much about it and how painful its conclusion is (sad tears can also be happy tears, fanart helps) (also um if anyone objectum/posic has followed i do have a whole blog for my more unhinged feelings and some lamenting about dysphoria but maybe thats relatable ((although it is adults only. i am an adult. i have adult feelings about some things)) SO UM YEAH! ANYWAYS LOVE COMPUTERS SO SO SOO MUCH and hopefully im getting a silly brickbuilt one for the holiday, if i do im gonna take pictures and gush probably a big thank you to E for being here as i figure out more stuff about myself, love you so much

[lilliannoco]

hello i am lorna and i habe been wayching lost for the first time w my bff ever rain. here are my ratings so far . will be updated.

ep 1- 7/10. loved shannon. loved sawyer. too much jack. hated charlie and his singing. “you all everybody! you all everybody!”

ep 2- 9/10 more sawyer i love him so much i actually am going crazy i dunno what else to say an this one

ep 3 - hurley is so funny and i love kate 10/10 no orher comments

ep 4 JOHN I LOVEEEE YOUUUU THIS IS FONNA KILL MEEEEE UGHHHHH 10/10. loved walt and sun. i love walt. hes so cute. ialso “the mighty huntress returns”. died a little. jack shut up btw. rose i love you . john badkstory killed me so so so much so harshly.

ep 5- “shouldve stayed down jack” yeah beat his ass i hate u jack. also i hate the way he swims why r u doing that. boones sideburns make me giggle why is he so. sun youre gorgeous and i love you. “are you a gemini?” claire youre amazing . “dogs can find pot and bombs so im sure they can find water”. way too much jack so far hes so uninteresting to me. i cant. jack pls stop running. also more suit guy! SUIT GUY IS ? JACKS DAD? wowzer. claire i love u. i love u claire. “hell, i’m an optimist” SAWYER I LOVE YOU SO MUCB I LOVE U SAWYER IM. “crazy people dont know theyre gettin crazy, they think theyre getting saner.” john ur so 💕💕 jacks dad is ? dead ? wow that was ssometjing. hi again sawyer. 9/10

ep 6- SUN!!!! SUNNNN!’!!!! charlie shut up. MICHEAL OH MY GOSH?? THATS?? IM??? “drugs. right” SHUT UP CHARLIE. SUNNNN SUN I LOVE YOU SUNNN. “whens your birthday?” odhsjdhsks 7/10

ep 7- already hate it. charlie i dont like u. SAWYER!!!!! sawyer snd kate are kind of … i like them maybe … jack and kate too thiugh cayse yk ANYWAYS charlie religious? i relate to him more everyday. “relax, choir boy” “i want my drugs back. i need em. im sick man, cant you see that?” hes so . hes so. okay i. yeah i get you charlie. yeah. sideburns is back! alrighty! SAWYER!!!!! sawyer and kate I LIKE THEM A LOT. A LOT. “oh, you’re feeling sorry for me.” “i dont feel sorry for you. i pity you.” “all you had to do was say please” SAWYER PDHSJRHWKDBAMBEMS. maybe not hating charlie so much. i love him actually hes so me. excrpt for his band. “you all everybody!” AGAIN!!! i cant be the only one who thinks shannon and boone are kind of weird to be siblings srry. “i want to stop feleing like this” CHSRLIEEEEE. “it was about the music, liam. you took that from me.” dude charlie is so. the way i hnderstand why he talks ab his band so much now! jesus chirst i LOVE U CHARLIE. “dude you rock!” charlie. NO CHARLIE. OHHH OKAY. im so happy for you. 1000000/10 i died

ep 8- SAWYER. SAWYERRRR. SAWYER! “thus my hat!” claireee 💕💕💕 “you wanna know what kinf of human being i am? read it. out loud. 😡” sawyer. cmon sawyer. sawyer ur the prettiest man ive ever seen. Sawyerrr. sawyer and kate kiss. wouldve been much better if it was under any other circumstances ever. sawyer. ur such a cunt i love u. the LETTER. CLAIRE AND CHARLIE!!! I LOVE U GUYS!!

ep 9 - sawyer 💕💕💕💕 SAYID ?! SAYID??? sayid. GOLF COURSE! SAYIDDDDD!!! SAYID I LOVE UUU ! SHANNONNN!! SAWYERR!’ MUSIC BOX! SAYID AND NADIA OH MY GOD. THE. THE. HIS. HE. IM. NDIDHEIRHSJDBSK I CANNOT. DANIELLE. IM. “i cant let you go. dont you understand? to have someone to talk to. to touch.” THIS IS PEAK “ive been holding on the past seven years to just a thought.” CHARLIE PLAYING GOLF!!! hes so great i love him. SAWYERRRR !!!!! SAWYER !! 10.3/10

[ferlost]

Tumblers algorithm put one of your comics on my dash "based on my likes" I had no knowledge that Thomas The Tank Engine had a fandom.

I have so many questions but honestly I'm following you because anyone who spends this much time making dramatic train drawings is fucking awesome. Plz keep drawing trains.

haha wowzers, thank you for the kind letter anon🙇 and sorry for the late reply. im glad that you enjoy the comics ! im happy to try and answer questions when i can if folks have them.

[ask-scroll-and-quill]

HI SCROLL HI QUILL, IM SO HAPPY!

-@ask-box-wowzer-kabowzer (forced happiness)

Hi, glad you seem to be feeling better.

-🪶

*cat-scroll meows*

M!A - 12/22

[cgtg]

listened. big faves are skyscraper, triumph, fool (had a Moment w this while exploring my friend's new mc server), 3030, apt. a, spitfire, unemployed black astronaut (BIG WOW tho i am a sucker for some acoustic), get wet, skrenth, the otherground pizza party, and small mr man pants. now i am picturing dave doing the nae nae. wowzers. out of curiosity, what was the original last song going to be on the playlist?

lets foucking goooooooooooooo

those r sum of my top favz in there 2 i fuckig love doseone & busdriver & del . raugh !!!!!!!! skyscraper is prob my fav song in the whole playlist atm, i am obsessed w it and the grandfather clock.

otherground pizza party is so funny, the reason i wanted 2 include r.a.p. ferreira n stuff is bc their lyricweaving is so good like a goddag wizzard. loooove it br0 im so happie u found stuff u liked in there <3

this is guna sound so dummy but i actually forgot. wat i had set up as the last song originally. i was always gona end it with You Go Dave but i had a diff sawng b4 that. i think it wus mebby a droop capone song? defo wouldnt have been as gud as small mr man pantz so im glad youtube sabo'd me

omfg man coe... thank u 4 listening 2 da whole thing u r such a real 1 ily. i spent so much time on it hahah.

edit: actually i think it wuz a subtitle song. checks out w the fact i only ended up w/ one subtitle song in the playlist.... only 1 of subtitles albums is on youtube i think

[thegoober010]

HELLO HELLO! Tis I!

A non-undertale related one today, which is,, insane for me.

Can you write father figure Shane stardew valley and his child who started drinking? And Shane is like “I know how that feels but you dont have to do this” and and and JADJFJFFJFJ

my daddy issues show whenever i request father figure writing because its always angsty

It can be a one shot or headcanons :3

-🐾

OMG GRAAAAA HEY PAW PRINT ANON I MISSED YOU SNOOKIE 😻😻!!!!

ALSO WOWZERS NON-UNDERTALE RELATED!!! SHOCKING!!(IM FOOLING AROUND TEEHEE) AND OMG OFC I CAN!!!

I WOULD NEVER EXPECT SHANE TO BE FATHER FIGURE MATERIAL BUT REAL !!!

IMA DO A ONE-SHOT AS A SORRY FOR MY ABSENCE GRAAAAAAAA!!

GENDER NEUTRAL READER AS USUAL <3!!

characters -> Father figure Shane (that's all-!!)

TW/CW -> substance abuse, mentions of depression, using alcohol as self-harm, and swearing- obviously-!

word count -> 2k/2192

On a serious note, if you or anyone you know is suffering from depression and is using unhealthy coping mechanisms such as drinking to try and drown their sorrows, please know that there is resources, there is help, and you/they are not alone. Please talk to someone or listen to them, because it's obvious you/they need it. Speak up before it is too late and leads to more risky behaviors. You're not alone and neither should they be. Things will get better, without happiness there won't be struggle, but without any struggle there will be no happiness. Things may be bad now, but it will turn out okay. You never know when your day of happiness shall come, so please don't give up and please do not use such unhealthy coping mechanisms, all they do is cause even more harm dear. Please talk to someone 💗.

now that, that's outta the way uhhhh onto the one-shot -!

"I know how that feels but.. you don't have to do this."

Just one more bottle. Just one more! What's the harm in one more drink? After all it's not like you're addicted or anything! No, no of course not! It's just for some temporary relief, it's not like you drink almost every damn hour of your life and waste your days lying in bed. Fuck. You allowed a soft sigh to escape your lips as you laid in bed on your side, hugging your knees and covering yourself with the blanket. You were in your room, per usual, you just finished your last bottle of alcohol yesterday and were hungover. You had a huge headache, you felt like throwing up and your stomach hurt, bad. You kept on over drinking even though you knew how it would affect you later, you kept drinking because it was your only escape from this shitty place. This town fucking sucked if we're gonna be honest, you felt like no one liked you, no matter what you did nothing was ever good enough, you wanted to leave, go explore but you couldn't you were stuck here due to the fact you don't have enough money to actually live yourself. Not only that but the people sucked. The mayor? He's absolute shit, making the farmer do all the work at this point. The people? Well some were nice but other times they're assholes if they don't know you well enough which sucked, a few were nice but... the town just sucked in general. All you could really do was just wallow in pity and drink your problems away, all your insecurities, it all felt like they were gone once you grabbed that bottle. You know it's wrong though, it hurt and tasted awful at first but you're slowly getting used to the feelings, sometimes you wonder if you should upgrade from alcohol to something more strong... maybe it'll help more? Right..?... fuck.

You groaned as you rubbed the side of your head. It hurt like hell. You had dark circles under your eyes, your hair was all messed up and frizzy, your lips were chapped and dry. It was quite obvious you weren't properly taking care of yourself, it could be spotted from a mile away. All of a sudden as you twist and turned in your bed you spotted your father, Shane, entering the room. You groaned and got up, quickly rubbing your eyes and fixing up your hair. "Hey, kiddo, you alright?" Shane asked. You nodded, giving him a quick hum as you put your shoes on, you didn't want your dad seeing you like this, you'd rather make a quick get away than let him see you not taking care of yourself because you know damn well he'd give you some long ass talk that you just don't have the patience to deal with today. "Mhm, I'll see you later dad." You mutter as you lazily tied your shoelaces, you quickly left your dad there with a concerned look on his face.

You made your way over to the Stardrop Saloon, as you made your way there you checked your pockets, quickly looking at the money you had to make sure you had enough to buy a beer or something of that sort. "Oh fuck yeah." You mutter as you saw you had just enough for one! You hummed as you made your way to the Saloon. You quickly threw the door open, making Gus raise a brow as he looked at you, he let out a small groan as he saw your face, even he was a bit concerned since you had been coming there more often. "The usual?" He asked earning a quick nod out of you. You sat down on one of the seats, quickly handing him the gold. He counted it before he raised a brow once he finished. "Uh, it's not enough, you're missing 2 gold." Gus said before he handed back the money, going back to cleaning a cup. You give him a confused stare. "The hell you mean I'm missing 2 gold? It's the same amount of money I gave you a week ago for a beer!" You exclaimed, you quickly lowered your voice as you saw the strange stares some of the people gave you. You cleared your throat slightly before shutting up. "Mhm, well the prices were raised recently." explained Gus, causing you to roll your eyes. "It's just 2 gold, come on! I'll pay the 2 gold tomorrow!" You negotiated, all Gus did was shake his head. "Sorry, I can't trust you to pay it tomorrow." Gus replied. You scoffed as you got off the chair. "Ugh.. fine, I'll see ya tomorrow I guess. Bye Gus." You grumbled as you made your way out the door. You let out a yawn, making your way back home.

You uttered curses under your breath as you made your way home. You leaned your head back, looking up at the stars as you followed the path back home. The sky was beautiful, sometimes you wondered what it would be like to be up there. Perhaps you would make a beautiful sky? Fuck, why are you thinking like this? Damnit. 'Just.. just focus on making it home' You thought to yourself. You turned your head to the side, taking notice of how the grass was blown ever so slightly by the gentle wind. Crickets chirped and the moon's light shun onto the grass and onto a lonely, empty bench. You stared silently at it for a while. 'A break from walking isn't so bad.' You though before making you way and plopping down onto it. You kept your hands in your hoodie pockets, your head leaning to the side as you looked up at the night sky. Your headache slowly started to come back as you finally tried to relax. Your eye-lids started feeling heavy, a soft sigh escaped as you your head leaned left, you felt so damn tired, you could just sleep right then and there. As you started to shut your eyes you felt a tap on your shoulder, causing you to almost immediately jump. "AH WHAT THE FUCK-" You yelled when you felt a hand on your shoulder, causing Shane to stare a bit shocked from your reaction. "Wow, calm down there kiddo." Shane said, taking his hand off. You let out a relieved sigh realizing it was just your dad. You clutched your chest as you calmed your breathing. "Ah- shit.. sorry dad you scared me there." You uttered.

Shane nodded in acknowledgment. "Is this spot taken?" he asked, obviously knowing the answer but wanting to check if his child was comfortable enough to let him sit near them. You shook your head. "No- uh no, sit if you want." You reply while rubbing the side of your neck awkwardly from the earlier exchange. You did not mean to scream that loud, damn. Shane nodded, quickly taking a seat next to his kid. You kept your obvious distance from him though, and it was quite obvious form the space between you two. "Uh, hey kid. Look, we gotta talk." Shane spoke softly, yet there was a hint of concern in his tone, he looked over at you. You raised a brow, you looked up at him for a bit before quickly looking away, leaning your head the opposite of where he was sitting. "Hm? 'Bout what?" You asked, crossing your arms and biting the side of your nails. "About your... problem with alcohol." Shane said bluntly, damn, just straight to the point. You almost choke on your spit, you continued to bite the side of your nails, your eyes grew wide before you shook your head, calming yourself down ever so slightly. "The hell are you talking about dad?" You ask, playing dumb. He furrowed his brows before placing a rough hand on your shoulder. "Don't act dumb, I know what you've been doing." Shane said, he was trying to be as calm as possible, his tone showed how worried he was though, you were going down the same path as he did before he had you, and he can't bear to see that. You tense up as his hand was roughly placed on your shoulder. You immediately pull his hand away. "THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM? I told you I'm not doing anything!?" You yell. You furrow your brows, your eyes squinting slightly as you did so. He seemed a bit surprised by your sudden snap. "Hey, calm down." Shane said calmly, he put his hands onto his lap, understanding you didn't want to be touched right now.

"Look, I know you want to act like nothing's happening, but I can tell when somethings wrong. You're my child, I don't want you hiding things from me, especially if it's making you make the same mistakes I did before." Shane explained, he stared at you while you looked away from him. "What are you talking about?" You ask, "I found the bottle under your bed kid. I know what you've been doing." Shane replied calmly. You immediately turned your head to look over at him, eyes wide. Fuck, you forgot to throw that bottle away. "Fffuck." You muttered, you rubbed the bridge of your nose in frustration, slouching as you rested your elbows on your knees. Your breath got shaky as you started to feel tears swell up in the inner corners of your eyes. Shane almost immediately noticed, he quickly placed a hand on your back, rubbing your back in circles. "Hey, hey, it's okay I'm not mad nor am I disappointed, okay? Hey it's okay." Shane reassured, yet you couldn't help but feel like such a disappointment. How could you be so damn stupid and let him find out? How could you let your dad down like this? You couldn't help but cry.

Shane took immediate notice, although he wasn't the best when it comes to comforting, especially comforting people, he tried. He pulled you into a quick embrace. Rubbing circles on your back as you cried. "Hey, it's okay. I'm not mad, I'll never be angry at you for something like this kid, so don't worry about whether I am or not, because I genuinely inly am not. I'm just worried on why you would look for comfort in drinking instead of telling me how you feel. Do you not trust me maybe?" Shane asked as he continued to keep you in a warm embrace. You shook your head. "No no no no it's not that... it's not that at all, I hic- just I.. I can't bring myself to.. to tell you any of the things I feel I-I feel bad doing that I don't want to burden you pa." You explain between sobs, trying your best not to make Shane feel like a bad father, because he wasn't he tried his best to stray you from the same path he had gone through yet here you were, going down the same road. You couldn't help but feel like you disappointed him because of that. Shane nodded in acknowledgment, he grabbed your cheeks and wiped away your tears gently with one hand while the other kept rubbing circles on your back in a calming motion. "Alright alright, I understand. But please, please for the love of god tell me whatever is happening, I don't want you to end up like how I did. You don't deserve that kiddo, you deserve to be happy. I learned from my mistakes which is why I never wanted you to go down the same path of addiction I went through. Please, whatever's happening tell me and I'll support you through it, not just because I don't want you to end up like how I did, but because I'm your dad. That's what I'm ment to do, help through difficult times. I know you can't help it but don't feel bad for reaching out to your own dad." He reminded you. "I love you kiddo, I'm your dad and I'm going to help you get through this alright, we'll get proper help because I don't want to lose you. I've gone through the same thing and this.. I know how it feels but... you don't have to do this kid."

You nodded in acknowledgment, it felt good to have him reassure you like this. It helped you realize how much you really mean to him. "Thanks dad..." You mumbled, your voice cracked ever so slightly, your voice also showed how tired you really were. You clung onto him. He sighed before picking you up like a child, although you were an adult he could kinda carry you easily. You let out a muffled sigh as you clung onto him, your eye-lids feeling heavier. You closed them and felt close to drifting off to sleep, but your headache would not allow you to. "My head hurts." You mutter. Shane nods in acknowledgment as he carries you back home. "Don't worry kiddo I'll give you medicine when we get home." Shane replied. You nodded slightly before giving him a hum of acknowledgment.

"I love you kid, and I'm going to help you no matter what"