#wow also these models suck. I fully spend and hour on them but...

[gaywarcriminals]

Fish when will you create the Qijiu Sims and have them married only to divorce and then marry again. When will you get the Sims omegaverse mod and have Qijiu be omega4omega?

I did actually do half of this last year. I was looking for the evidence but apparently I only took screenshots of SJ being mean to YQY. I also set YQY to be able to get pregnant (in theory)(I'm not letting qijiu have children), which is sort of like an omega--

Bonus half-finished house, and painting SJ did of definitely maojiu and qigou.

[quicksilversquared]

Plagg’s School

Plagg isn't much interested in being any sort of teacher, but when the opportunity arises for him to spend some time with Marinette, he jumps on the opportunity to try to unteach some of the less healthy lessons that she's been taught.

He didn't expect it to be this hard, or for there to be so much for her to unlearn. But he's no quitter, and Paris needs Ladybug to be at her best.

A continuation of sorts for my story Superhero Lessons

Plagg hadn't thought that this would be so hard.

When Tikki and Master Fu had decided to have Marinette and Adrien switch Miraculous temporarily (thanks to a subtle suggestion from Plagg, but framed so that they thought that he was kidding), Plagg had thought that all it would take to knock her out of her mindset of having to feel responsible for everyone else's actions and reactions all the time would be to just make some snide comments when he saw adults behaving badly. Marinette- Ladybug- was smart, surely she would pick up on the clues fast enough and then Plagg could sit back for the rest of the week, relax, and enjoy the plethora of cheese bread that came along with living in a bakery.

He was wrong.

Sure, there had been plenty of opportunities for side-eying and "offhand" comments, and Plagg had taken pretty much every single one. But Marinette had brushed the comments off or repeated the party line of "I have to be the bigger person" every. single. time. It was enough to make Plagg want to scream.

Not that it was a bad thing for a Ladybug to be kind and caring and self-aware, of course! Those were very good things. And yet. And yet.

Marinette's parents were caring and loving, sure, but they seemed to have higher expectations for Marinette than they did for actual adults sometimes. They- and Tikki, and probably the teachers in Marinette's life, too- had drilled in the lesson that Marinette had to be kind, had to be understanding, had to be accommodating and giving and accepting and not hurt people's feelings and always apologize when she did something wrong and-

Ugh. There was such thing as too much. Teenagers would make mistakes and have honest reactions sometimes, and it was supposed to be up to the actual, literal adults to understand that and not get disproportionately upset about it. Maybe an apology would make sense some of the time, but when Marinette was the only one apologizing for an honest misunderstanding?

It was just one more thing on the pile of stuff to stress about, one more subtle push towards you have to be perfect, you can't ever make anyone upset ever, everyone else's feelings and reactions are your fault.

Plagg had had kittens who were sensitive and anxious before. He knew how they thought. There most definitely was such thing as taking on too much of the blame and too much responsibility.

If a grown-ass adult got akumatized because of something a frustrated teenager said... yeah, that was definitely on the adult.

So that was annoying, and Marinette seemed to be slipping further and further down the path of fully believing what she had been told, always careful to try to keep her own emotions under control but taking what seemed to be full responsibility for when other people couldn't manage to do the same.

And then there was the whole overworking thing.

Plagg had thought that Adrien was busy for his age, with all of his activities- the fencing, the basketball, the Mandarin and piano and modeling and commercials. But Adrien at least had plenty of time set aside in his schedule for homework and studying and projects. If he was scrambling to get stuff done, it was usually because the akuma attacks at that time had been longer than usual (or more numerous than usual) or because Adrien had spent too much time on the Ladyblog. If Adrien mentioned that he didn't have enough time to study or do a quality job on his homework, Nathalie would rearrange his schedule at once to give him more time, canceling extra lessons for a week or two while Adrien got himself caught up.

Marinette's activities could largely be framed as self-imposed, but there were so many of them that it was honestly a miracle that she could balance everything.

Or...maybe less a miracle and more a necessity, because she just couldn't say no and people took advantage of that. Like, a lot.

"It's not that bad this week!" Marinette told Plagg on their third evening together as she finished hand-sewing a seam on a doll that someone- Plagg had neither caught the name nor cared- had commissioned from her so that they would be done and put away before Alya and Nino brought their siblings over for Marinette to babysit so that the two of them could run off and suck face together instead of being responsible older siblings. "Sometimes I have commissions and tests and other stuff all in one week. Tikki helps me study, sometimes. And then other weeks, I have almost nothing and I can catch up."

...seriously, how was she living like this?

"I didn't hear them asking you to babysit," Plagg said instead of vocalizing any of his concerns, because he couldn't give away his lazy cat reputation right away. "What, did I sleep through that or something?"

"No, it's... it's kind of an ongoing thing, I guess." Marinette didn't look at all enthused about that. "They asked once, a few months ago, and I said yes then because they sounded so excited about this movie that was running and they wouldn't be able to catch it during their normal date time on the weekend, and they, uh..."

"Took that as a standing invitation to keep doing it," Plagg filled in, entirely unimpressed. "Wow. Great friends you have there. What if there's an akuma attack while you're babysitting? What if you have stuff to do? Don't you have a test to study for on Friday?"

Marinette's shoulders hitched up, just a little. "I just- I'll study tomorrow, over lunch. Then I can catch up. And I'll tell my parents that I can't play video games with them until Friday evening at the earliest."

"So let me get this straight- you don't get any free time so that your friends can have more free time to go groom each other's faces?" Plagg demanded. "Fun trade-off you have going on there. Also, I didn't hear an answer about the akuma thing."

"I just like helping!" Marinette protested. "That's- that's all, really. I can handle it."

And that was the end of that conversation. Even with Plagg's increasingly heavy-handed comments, Marinette seemed determined to ignore the issue and assure him that she could handle it. Even when Twin No. 2 pulled the pinned pieces of fabric off of Marinette's mannequin and spilled a box of sewing machine threads, taking away an hour of Marinette's sleep as she tried to put everything back together. Even when one of her classmates asked Marinette to fix a torn shirt right away, eating up half an hour of her study time. Even when Manon got dumped on Marinette for a bit of emergency last-minute babysitting with absolutely no warning and without really asking her if it was okay.

Seriously, did no one else notice how much work they were dumping on her? Even without taking her superhero activities into account, it was a lot. With the superhero activities, it was crossing the border into too-muchland. And if Marinette wanted to do anything fun? Anything for her?

There just wasn't any time.

Had Tikki said nothing? Plagg knew that she was all about being productive and staying busy and making the most of opportunities and potential and helping people, but not to the point of running her Chosen into the ground!

Thankfully, Plagg was going to get another week with Marinette. Tikki had requested an extension under the guise of Adrien needing more time to actually figure out how to use Ladybug's powers, since during their one swapped-Miraculous battle so far, Lady Noire had told Mister Bug how to use the Lucky Charm that he had gotten. To Plagg, she had said something about teaching Adrien to enforce his boundaries.

Well, okay, maybe she had been a little more specific than that, but Plagg had gotten distracted by the news and had been trying to think of how he could knock Marinette out of the frankly toxic mindset that she had been pushed into when Tikki was talking and so he hadn't quite caught all of the details. But the gist of it was that Adrien didn't push back enough when people made him uncomfortable and Tikki was working on changing that somehow.

Plagg wished her luck. His advice whenever Adrien had commented on people clinging to him had been to bite them. Or, alternatively, shove them off. Adrien had been horrified by both suggestions, and that whole thing had gone nowhere.

Nowhere, like how things with Marinette seemed to be going. But it was the weekend now, and so Plagg had time to absolutely drive Marinette up the wall until she cracked enough for him to drag her frustrations out and actually push her towards doing something about them besides just "work harder".

It would be more effort than he normally put in, but Paris needed Ladybug to be rested and focused and not overwhelmed with responsibilities. If she fell and Adrien was left to fight on his own...

Plagg wanted to believe in his kid, he really did, but Adrien had a habit of relying largely on Ladybug to lead the battles and decide a course of action. If Ladybug fell in battle, or if she ended up akumatized because of all of the pressure that was being put on her...

Well, it wouldn't be pretty.

So naturally, Plagg decided to antagonize Marinette. And by that, he meant that he presented her with a list of completely unreasonable demands for her to fulfill since they were going to be spending a second week together, and he kept ramping it up until she had gone from being mildly irritated to gritting her teeth to being so frustrated that she was on the brink of screaming at him.

And then, very deliberately, he pushed her that little bit more.

"I can't!" Marinette finally snapped at him, glaring at Plagg with a poisonous expression. "I just can't! You're asking too much- I'm busy, and you know that! I need time to sleep and study and get caught up on my school projects and work on that draft of Clara's dress and do my class rep duties and I just told you that I have to remake Ivan's Kitty Section mask because it fell in the river and I don't! Have! Time! To do a special run to the cheese market all the way across the city to find some really rare cheese that might not even be in stock this week, and I don't have time to make you a special embroidered bed with thirty-three pillows or a monogrammed bathrobe, and I don't have time to do anything on your list, really! I already don't have any time to myself, and you're not! Helping!"

"But I require it," Plagg said haughtily, though he was keeping a careful eye on the window. If he was going to wind Ladybug up, he had to make sure that he could pull the plug if needed. "You make everything else work, don't you?"

"Barely!" Marinette was barely holding it together, he could tell. There were frustrated tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. "I'm so busy this weekend, and I have more tests this week and I'm already so worried that I'm going to fail because I don't have time to study, and if there are any akuma attacks this week then I'm absolutely screwed, because I'll fall behind again and won't have time to catch up!"

Very deliberately, Plagg yawned as wide as possible and then made a show of inspecting his (nonexistent) claws. "Mm-hmm. So...about the cheese-"

"NO!" Marinette half-shrieked. "No, no, no, I refuse. I can't, I literally can't, so no, I am not eating up even more of my sleeping time just so that I can go across the town and comb through some out-of-the-way cheese shop to find some cheese that they might have. I cannot. I'm tired of giving up all of my free time to bend over backwards and meet everyone's expectation, okay? Enough!"

There was a pause, and then Plagg smirked.

"So you can say no. I was starting to wonder."

Marinette's eyes snapped to him, still glimmering with frustrated, stressed tears. The first one finally broke free and started to make its way down her cheek. "Huh?"

"You say yes to everything that people ask of you, no matter how much it inconveniences you. No matter how busy you already are. Even if you want to do your own things, and other people are being selfish in their requests on your time." Plagg zipped around Marinette's head, forcing her to spin around to follow his progress. "How many of the things that you have coming up this week aren't necessary? How many are other people's responsibilities that they're shoved onto you? Aren't you supposed to have a vice president to help you with your class representative duties? Why is other people's free time more important than yours? Why are other people setting deadlines for you when you're the one who has to work under them and you'd prefer a deadline later on, so that it doesn't coincide with tests and result in you pushing yourself so hard?"

Marinette swallowed hard, not saying anything as she stared at him. She was still shaking, and even if Plagg wasn't nearly as attuned to emotions as Nooroo, he could still tell that she was brimming with frustrations, all ready to come out.

So, if Marinette was actually being truthful with him and with herself, he might as well get it all out.

"So if we're being honest, how do you feel about the babysitting?" Plagg prompted, zipping closer. "About giving up your free time so that your friends can run off and suck face more? About having three rambunctious kids running around your room for hours and tearing everything up? Do you like that?"

Marinette wavered for a moment, but clearly he had done a good job with pushing her frustrations to the top. "I hate it! It's fine some weeks, but most weeks I don't have time to deal with getting distracted for three hours and then having at least an hour of clean-up afterwards! I have homework and commissions and superheroing and- and everything to do! And Alya has the Ladyblog, but clearly she's not lacking for time to work on it considering some of the highlight videos that she's put up recently. And there are weeks where they ask me to babysit more than once, even though I don't have time for it, and- actually, it's not so much asking so much as telling me that they'll need me to babysit, because they just assume that I'll be able to do it!" Another frustrated tear slid down her face. "And then they have more free time and I have less, and I'm already starting with less free time than they have, and they- they know that!"

Plagg hovered and waited for her to get it all out.

"I thought that the babysitting would be a one-time thing, that's why I agreed- well, that and the fact that I just can't- can't say no," Marinette said, finally starting to sound actually angry. "And they know that, and it just feels like they're taking advantage of that because they want more than one date per week- and it's more than two, too, if you count the times when they eat lunch together at the park or outside of school! And they always talk about what a fun time they had, and how nice it was to be able to spend some time together and relax, and then here I am, not having fun or relaxing at all!"

...okay, so there was maybe more frustration there than Plagg had been expecting.

"I'd be much happier if I didn't have to babysit anyone besides Manon, and only Manon if I get some warning and actually get asked," Marinette continued, fiercely wiping away yet another tear before it could get too far. "I'd get some time back to myself. It wouldn't make everything better, but it would take off a lot of stress- but they don't see that! They're apparently blind to everything except for their dates! Never mind that Marinette is falling asleep in class or that she's working on homework literally whenever she can fit it in, let's add some more stuff to her plate!"

If Marinette got akumatized while Plagg was with her, Tikki would actually kill him. So maybe it was time for Plagg to step in.

"So say no," Plagg cut across before any purple butterflies showed up. "You can, I know you can. Set boundaries. I've seen you stand up to people before. What's different this time?"

Marinette glanced at the floor, worrying her lip. After a moment, she sighed and looked up. "Because they're my friends. And when Madam Chamack shows up with Manon, she's a family friend and an adult. And I don't want to let them down."

"Yay! Honesty! Almost as good as cheese." Plagg smirked at her eye-roll. She was still a little wobbly-looking, but a small distraction was good. "If they're taking advantage of you to the point where you're stressed and strung out and they still don't back off, then is letting them down a little really the bigger evil?"

There was a pause, and then Marinette shook her head.

"Are you the only babysitter in Paris?"

That got a laugh out of Marinette. "Not even close."

"Is there some law that says that they can only ask you to babysit?"

"...no."

"Do they need to respect your needs and boundaries if they're your friends?"

Finally, Marinette smiled. "Yeah. I- I'll tell Alya next time I see her that if they want to go on a date when they're supposed to be babysitting, they need to find someone else. I can't do it anymore. Even on my slower weeks, I just- I need a break from their siblings." Then she paused, suddenly unsure. "Is- is that selfish? To not help out on weeks when I can spare the time?"

Plagg paused for a moment, still stuck on that when they're supposed to be babysitting. That sounded a whole lot like Alya and Nino were shirking their responsibilities without their parents knowing, which made the whole situation even worse, but that- that was beside the point right now. He could pick at that little tidbit later. Instead, he yawned, flopping down on the desk. Now that Marinette's emotions had stabilized again, he could get back to his normal careless persona. "Who cares? If you get a slow week, in my eyes, you earned it and get to enjoy it. Sit back, sleep in some sunbeams, eat some cheese..."

Marinette laughed at that, her shoulders relaxing just that little last bit. "Thanks, Plagg." Then she paused, glancing over at him. "I'm still not getting you your crazy fancy cheese, though. Or any of that other ridiculous stuff."

Plagg did his best to hide his grin. "Ah, well. It was worth a try."

  By the time Monday rolled around, Marinette had gotten all of her pent-up and packed-away emotions worked out and had started an action plan list on how to become less stressed. The name had made Plagg gag- action plan? That sounded like a lot of work!- but after seeing the list, Plagg had to admit that it wasn't nearly as bad as it sounded.

First of all, there was the end of all babysitting for her friends for her foreseeable future and Marinette had told her parents that she would only babysit Manon when it was an emergency, and she reserved the right to say no without being questioned as to why she couldn't do it.

That was important for her to say up front so the adults wouldn't try to make her feel guilty by questioning why she wanted her free time for herself, and Plagg was proud of her for doing it- not, of course, that he was going to let that on too much. She would think that he was getting soft on her.

The second part of her plan was entirely Marinette's idea, though she was giving Plagg the credit. No longer was she going to let other people set inconvenient commission deadlines for her when they could easily wait a week for their pieces and put not even a quarter of the amount of stress on Marinette. And while she was more than willing to help people with their problems, she wasn't going to take over their responsibilities for them, and if they had something that, say, needed mending but wasn't needed right away, it might have to sometimes wait a day or two until Marinette could actually spare the time. She would actually use her calendar for keeping track of her own deadlines out a ways, and then all of her activities and responsibilities would be spread out and more manageable instead of hitting her with all the grace of a brick wall.

All of this, of course, was easier said than done. People had gotten used to Marinette shoving aside absolutely everything that she was doing to help them that second, and no doubt some people might question the change and that might be hard to stand up to- especially if Tikki was in Marinette's ear and trying to convince her that she could manage just one more thing. But Marinette seemed determined to stick to her plan.

Which was great! Now Plagg could just sit back, relax, and enjoy the cheese bread that he was getting in place of his Camembert (he would have asked for a baked Camembert bread bowl, but, well, Marinette did have exams coming up and even without the babysitting and with the deadlines for her other, non-school stuff pushed back, she was a bit busy). Marinette seemed to have a handle on how to most effectively use his powers, which wasn't surprising. Back when she and Adrien were starting out, she had given him directions on what he should be using his Cataclysm on more often than not. Learning how to use the staff to helicopter herself around had taken a little practice and it was obvious that she didn't have the fencing background that Adrien did, but she could batter stuff into submission just fine.

In fact, just fine was maybe a little bit of an understatement. Her battering was actually kind of terrifying. Not that Plagg was worried about his own life, of course- the ability to phase through things came in handy at times- but, well...

Adrien had made a mistake. Or perhaps Plagg should say Mister Bug had made a mistake.

During the previous akuma battle, Lady Noire had apparently made some comment about how Mister Bug's outfit was more interesting than her usual one, just as a little side comment. Plagg was willing to bet that she had been glancing at Mister Bug's outfit to try to get ideas to change her own usual suit, but that was neither here nor there. Instead of simply accepting the comment and moving on, Mister Bug had said that he was close to the fashion industry, so of course he had creative design ideas and did she maybe want him to help her come up with a new design for her Ladybug suit?

Plagg had winced at both that and the dog-whistle pitch that Marinette had reached while relaying that particular comment. Mister Bug was really, really lucky that the akuma had made a reappearance right then so that Lady Noire hadn't had time to respond.

"Okay, so I gotta have a talk with my kid and tell him to shut his big fat mouth, got it!" Plagg said loudly before Marinette could descend any further into displeased mutters. He had frankly been incredibly surprised to find out that Ladybug's civilian self was so interested- and so successful- at design and fashion when he first learned her identity, but after talking with Tikki and finding out how unsure Marinette had been when she first transformed...yeah, okay, he could understand the footie pajamas look. It probably had just become too engrained for her to consider changing it before. "Though I wouldn't be surprised if Tikki has already told him the same thing."

Marinette finally giggled, some of her murder look finally slipping off of her face. "I can't see Tikki ever telling anyone to shut their 'big fat mouth'."

"She might word it a bit differently, whatever." Plagg landed on Marinette's desk, confident (at least for the time being) that she wasn't going to go berserker on him. "So, redesigning the Ladybug suit?"

"I didn't realize that I could, before." Marinette tapped her fingers against her desk before reaching for her notebook and a pencil. "I just- I'm used to what I have now. And I know that I shouldn't design anything that could snag, or get in my way, or- I don't know." She frowned. "That leaves me with- what? Black paneling and trim?"

"And armor and padding," Plagg added helpfully. He paused, then lowered his voice conspiringly. "My kid doesn't actually have a six-pack or ripped arms. The suit just makes it look that way, because that's what he wants."

Marinette giggled some more.

"And the way his costume looks has less to do with design and more to do with his obsession with all things anime," Plagg continued loftily, yawning widely. "And comics and magical girl cartoons. I just put his wishes together in a tasteful manner."

"I like this whole exchange kwamis thing. I'm learning quite a bit." Marinette tapped her pencil against her lips, then started sketching. "I want to be careful about where I put any armor, I think. I need to stay flexible and not have excess resistance when I'm dodging. But maybe some protection on my arms and legs would be good, and if I put some black here..."

Plagg let out a relieved breath as Marinette threw herself into her sketches, Mister Bug's comment apparently forgotten in favor of designing, and tried not to think of how close Adrien had come to getting gutted for implying that he was better at design than a contest-winning aspiring fashion designer.

Hopefully that was all the drama there would be for this week, because Plagg wasn't sure how much more he could take.

  Plagg clearly needed to stop thinking that his job was done. Every time he did- every time that he thought that maybe now he could nap the day away instead of sitting alert and making sure that Marinette wasn't crashing and burning with her resolution to not get herself crazy overworked- something came up.

Thankfully, it wasn't the reporter girl trying to get Marinette to change her mind about babysitting again after having taken the day before off. No, she seemed to have accepted Marinette's decision well enough. But it did have something to do with the reporter girl. The reporter girl, and his regular Chosen.

So naturally, Plagg had to get involved.

If someone had asked Plagg before to describe Marinette, he would have said that she was confident, yet sometimes randomly turned into a tongue-tied mess around Adrien.

...there may have been some misconceptions there.

He was partially right, of course. It would have been hard to be completely off, considering how much time his Chosen spent talking about his friends. But the panicking...

Yeah, not random. Not random at all.

Plagg watched with no small amount of bemusement as Marinette got pretty much railroaded into coming along on an outing with her friends where the goal was clearly to shove Adrien and Marinette together so that Marinette would have some space to ask Adrien out. Marinette clearly wasn't comfortable with the idea (and Plagg didn't blame her- he had, unfortunately, seen the results of what he could only assume were similar set-ups), but Alya clearly wasn't taking no for an answer.

...seriously, was this the girl who had pretty much branded herself Best Friend of the Year? Couldn't she see how panicky Marinette was getting?

Plagg sank back into the bag, frowning at the air. Okay, so he couldn't be his usual brush-off self here, that much was obvious. That was not what Marinette needed. Her emotions were already high enough, and that was dangerous.

What was Tikki doing in these situations? Was she just encouraging Marinette along? That seemed likely, but couldn't she tell when endless encouragement just wasn't helping? It seemed like Alya shoving Marinette into situations she wasn't ready for could easily turn into prime akumatization territory, considering how often it seemed to end in anything ranging from embarrassment to full-on humiliation. Add in the fact that both of them knew that Adrien was pretty much entirely hung up on his superhero partner (and had been minorly distracted by Fencer Girl, but that- Plagg knew that that wasn't serious at all), and trying to get Marinette to confess just didn't seem like a good idea at all.

Seriously, when had he turned into the kwami who did all of the advice stuff? It was weird and he didn't like it.

"How often does that happen?" Plagg asked as Marinette dropped her phone back onto the desk with a groan. "When she tries to set you up when you don't want to, I mean?"

Marinette had to think about it. "Bigger set-ups like this? Every other week, maybe? Smaller things at school...whenever she can manage it, really. And since she's dating Adrien's best friend..."

Plagg could fill in the blanks there. It was happening really, really frequently.

Well.

"Doesn't seem like she's being that great of a friend if she's not listening to you when you say no," Plagg said, making sure to adopt his laziest voice. He threw in a toothy yawn for good measure as he rolled into a ray of sunlight. "Especially when you're practically melting down over the idea."

"I just- I just need a push or I'll never do it, that's all!" Marinette defended at once. Plagg suspected that that was what she had had Alya tell her over and over before, and ugh, how had Ladybug ended up with so many bad lessons drummed into her head? "I mean, maybe I'll be uncomfortable when I confess, but if I actually manage it- and if things go well, I guess..."

By the way she trailed off, Plagg deduced that she was trying to convince herself, too.

"Do I gotta make you cry again so that you'll be honest with yourself and with me, or can we skip the excuses this time?" Plagg asked bluntly, and was faintly amused to see the startled way that Marinette blinked at him. "How do you feel about the whole situation?"

There was a pause. Plagg waited. Then...

"I don't like it."

He cocked an eyebrow at her. "Sorry, I didn't hear that. Repeat louder, please?"

"Ugh, you're so annoying!" Marinette scowled at him, but that didn't last long. "Fine, I don't like it! I always feel so uncomfortable and make a fool of myself and maybe Alya finds that amusing, but I don't! Adrien is going to think that I'm a complete nutcase and then even if I ever do manage a confession without immediately walking it back again, he's not going to be interested! Not that he's interested now- I know he likes someone else, but Alya always insists that maybe he would change his mind if he knew that I liked him, which- how likely is that, really? Maybe it worked for her and Nino, but that's an exception to the rule!"

Plagg settled in. It seemed like this was going to be a long rant.

"And I tried letting Adrien go and moving on before, but they said that I couldn't give up!" Marinette continued, and Plagg cocked a brow at that. Oh, THAT was interesting. Also something he could use. "And I don't- I mean, I understand the value of staying positive, but I just don't..." She sighed, her shoulders slumping. "I don't know if it's realistic anymore."

"Well, at least we've gotten past the denial stage," Plagg commented. He had wondered. Instead of saying that, he shuffled into a more comfortable position and turned an eye to watch Marinette. "D'you ever feel comfortable around model kid?"

"Yes! We're friends now, and we can talk most of the time. It's just when I'm expected to be trying to ask him out that I get all tongue-tied and make a fool of myself." Marinette flopped back in her chair and- yeah, she and Adrien were meant to be together. They were both crazy dramatic people. "I just don't know what to do."

Plagg snorted. "Isn't it obvious? Don't try asking him out, duh. Problem solved."

Marinette narrowed her eyes at him, suddenly suspicious. "Why do I get the feeling that you're trying to get me to give up on my crush so that I'll date Chat Noir instead?"

Plagg snorted, resisting the urge to bash his head against the wall. "D'you really think I want my kitten dating? He's sappy enough when he's just at crush stage. And he would be even more self-sacrificing if you two were dating, and that's already gotten real old, real fast."

Marinette's wary expression stayed in place for a minute longer, and then it dropped as she glanced away. "I- I can see where that would make sense, but if I don't at least try, I just feel guilty for not making use of the opportunities Alya sets up for me. Like, that just feels rude somehow."

Plagg snorted. "The opportunities that pretty much get dropped into her lap because of her boyfriend and that she's set up even though literally everything about you is telling her no, you don't want to and aren't ready? How very generous of her to keep going against your wishes."

He didn't get a response to that. He hadn't expected one.

Plagg forged on anyway. "Like, kid, I've been with you- what? A week and a half? And I could tell that you didn't want to get pushed into confessing again, so it's not as though you aren't being plenty obvious about it. And clearly the 'shove you in the deep end and hope you swim' method isn't working. It's not suddenly going to start working. And if model boy already likes someone..."

"Then I'm just setting myself up for disappointment and failure," Marinette finished. Her expression- no, her entire being- drooped, but then she straightened back up, and this time, it was like a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. Which kind of seemed like the opposite of what should have happened, but maybe the whole 'keeping her hopes up' thing had been harder on Marinette than he had thought. "So I should just give up on my crush, then."

"I mean, it might be a good idea." Adrien would 100% chop Plagg's cheese supply in half if he knew that Plagg was encouraging Ladybug to stop crushing on civilian-him, but it was better than Marinette actually working up the courage to confess, only for Adrien to reject civilian-Ladybug and potentially mess up their friendship. "Or at least, like, not act on it. If your friend sets up 'opportunities', then just hang out with model-kid as friends. And, uh." He waved at the pictures on the wall. "I mean, if you want this kid to come over and hang out..."

Marinette drooped, and seriously, her spine was getting one hell of a workout with this conversation. "He's already seen them. When we had Jagged Stone over here, he missed seeing the bathroom and came up here and broadcast live to all of Paris. And Adrien was watching. But now he thinks I just have them because I'm a fan of his father's designs!" she added quickly, as though Plagg didn't know that already. Adrien had been rather puzzled by that explanation at first, Plagg knew, but had decided to just accept it eventually.

"It might still be weird for him to come over and have his face staring back at him all over the place," Plagg said helpfully instead. "'Specially if he's the only model that you have featured on your wall."

That made Marinette pause.

"Just something to think about," Plagg added airily. "That, and the fact that I've already heard your friend complain twice about you missing stuff when you were out fighting akumas, so if you were dating someone..."

Marinette caught on right away and she threw her head back and groaned. "You're so right! How did I not think of that? Even if Adrien did like me, even if I did actually successfully ask him out, even if he did say yes- I would be just like his father, flaking out on him all of the time! We'd never last, and I'd just end up hurting him in the process. And that means that it wouldn't ever have been a good idea to try to move on from him with Luka," she added. "And I shouldn't even think of dating before Hawkmoth is defeated."

Plagg breathed a little internal sigh of relief. Thank goodness. Crisis averted. Marinette wouldn't date anyone until Hawkmoth was defeated, then they could do their little reveal, find out that her partner had been model boy all along, and start dating and being all mushy. No one would be dating anyone else and mucking things up, and they would be in a good enough mood that he might be able to persuade Adrien to buy him the really fancy cheese.

...or they would be so busy being mushy and gross with each other that they would forget about Plagg and he would go unfed, but he was trying to think positive.

"So what are you going to do on your little outing tomorrow?" Plagg asked, rolling over so that he would stay in the middle of his sunbeam. "Are you going?"

"It would be nice to. I have time." Marinette sent him a small smile, and Plagg grinned in response. "Besides, if I don't go, then Adrien will be third-wheeling for Alya and Nino, and that's no fun. I would know, I've definitely done it plenty. And the last time he got to come out, it was on a group outing and Lila spent most of the time clinging to his arm, which is also no fun."

"Mmm."

"Lila was Volpina and Chameleon," Marinette told him, as if Plagg didn't already know that- and okay, maybe he wasn't supposed to know that, whatever. "The liar. She's been pretty much completely discredited now by our class, but she still likes trying to cling, even though it's obvious Adrien hates it. Last I heard, she was trying to claim that she just wanted to fit in and that was why she had made up all of the stories she did, but I don't think anyone has bought that."

"I'm surprised she got to come along on the class outing at all," Plagg commented. He had said the same thing to Adrien at the time, and-

Marinette sighed. "We don't really exclude people when it's an entire class outing, or Chloe wouldn't have been invited to most of the stuff we've done. There's some stuff like birthday parties where we don't have the entire class come, but everything else..."

-Adrien had given the exact same excuse, almost word-for-word.

"At least Chloe's been better recently," Marinette added absently as she reached for her mouse to wake up her computer. "Ever since Adrien put his foot down with her, she's really been trying to improve. And then when Chloe behaves better, Sabrina behaves better. So we don't mind having them along as much, it's just Lila being an annoyance now."

Ah-hah. An opening! Tikki was apparently still having trouble with getting Adrien to enforce his boundaries (because he was dense as a fruitcake and didn't understand that he could have boundaries, seemingly) and Master Fu had said no on a third consecutive week's swap, which meant that they had to try something different. And different might, in this case, mean using a friend as their mouthpiece.

"Maybe you could help Adrien get Lila off of him," Plagg suggested. "He would probably appreciate that."

Marinette paused, glancing over at him. "...I guess that would be a good idea. I mean, I know Nino's mentioned it a few times before, but..."

Okay, maybe this would be harder than Plagg thought. But Adrien had to catch on eventually. Maybe. Hopefully.

...a kwami could hope.

  By the time Plagg was returned to Adrien on Sunday evening, they had accomplished several things.

First of all- and most importantly, in Master Fu's eyes- Ladybug and Chat Noir had a deeper understanding of each other's powers and would be able to use the other person's Miraculous in an emergency. Adrien had used Lucky Charm without help from Ladybug several times in a row now, and well, Marinette had mastered the baton. But that wasn't all.

Marinette had gotten her schedule sorted out and the perfection complex addressed, and seemed to have figured out how to use the word no. She had successfully gone on their friend group's outing without stuttering at all around Adrien, and while Alya seemed a bit miffed that Marinette hadn't even tried to ask him out, Adrien seemed plenty pleased to have been able to hold a normal conversation with Marinette.

(Although a 'normal conversation' was not what Plagg personally would have called it. They had started out a little awkward after Alya unceremoniously dragged Nino off- and that was something that maybe should have been addressed, because Plagg knew that Adrien was missing spending as much time as he used to with Nino- but after Marinette had accidentally punned and Adrien had lit up in utter delight, they had ended up spending a great deal of time giggling over absolutely ridiculous puns together. Then Adrien had decided to be dramatic about something- a pun that Marinette had pretended not to be impressed by, if Plagg's memory was serving him correctly- and, well, they were pretty hopeless after that. Calling them normal would be completely and utterly inaccurate.)

Marinette had even managed to score a point on the 'enforce Adrien's personal space' board by commenting on Lila's insistence on clinging to Adrien's arm when he was clearly uncomfortable with it and throwing in the word 'harassment', just loud enough for a nearby teacher to overhear. Madam Mendeleev had been on the case at once, and from what Plagg had heard, Lila had gotten detention and Adrien had finally been convinced that he didn't have to put up with unwanted clinging, thanks in large part to their teacher's intervention.

It was a very devious way of going about that, but Plagg couldn't say that he didn't approve, because he very much approved. If he had been assigned to Marinette from the start- well, she might have been a better fit with Tikki, but she would have made a fantastic Black Cat as well.

"Did you have a good week?" Adrien wanted to know as Plagg wolfed down a giant wedge of Camembert. Cheese bread had been good and it was always good to mix things up, but Camembert was always going to be Plagg's true love. "Tikki was loads of fun!"

"Oh, yeah, all smooth sailing," Plagg lied at once, choosing not to tell Adrien about having made Ladybug cry. It was all for the greater good, after all. Besides, Tikki would probably end him herself once she found out. Then, a thought struck him, and oh, yeah, he probably should say something before Ladybug transformed again with her new suit and Adrien decided to open his big mouth and comment on it. "But Adrien?"

"Yeah?"

"Do me a favor and don't say anything that might sound like you're implying that you're a better designer than Ladybug," Plagg demanded, remembering the absolute ire that he had felt zing through Lady Noire when Mister Bug had made his comment. "If you value your life. Seriously. Don't."

Adrien has the audacity to look puzzled. "Wait, why? I was just trying to offer some help!"

"Can't tell you. Identity stuff." Adrien would be kicking himself as soon as they did the reveal, whenever that was, but he just had to have an ounce of self-preservation between now and then. When they did, though...

Well, based on what Plagg had seen over the past two weeks, the reveal would go really well. By the time it happened, Marinette and Adrien were pretty much guaranteed to be fantastic friends. There would be feelings on both sides, he was willing to bet, and while Plagg was already gearing himself up for plenty of moaning about how gross the two of them were together, well...

After doing so much to save the city, the two of them deserved some cuddly mushiness. He could tolerate it.

[the-amazing-spider-bi]

the coffeeshop au no one asked for (now with a part 2)

“So, May, what do you want?” Madison asks the customer.

“That’s not even close to my name,” the other girl says, but she grins anyway. Weirdo. “One Iced Coffee for Zoe, with a little caramel twirl thingie, please.”

“Sure, Zack,” Madison says, and grabs her cup with a little more strength than necessary. Zoe snorts. She probably has some sort of insult kink. She and Kyle are going to have the worst sex ever.

(In which Madison does not have a crush on the cute hipster girl who keeps coming to the coffee shop, she and Kyle are definitely not competing for the girl’s attention, Cordelia thinks they are all model employees, and all of the above is a lie.)

Read on ao3 I Following prompts by origami-teacup 

october.

“He fucking folded her napkin as a rose, and then gave her to her and said, I’m sorry, I didn’t have time to buy you flowers,” Madison groans before she kicks an unfortunate plastic cup which has absolutely nothing to do with this.

“Wow, the guy has got so much more game than you,” Queenie says, and Madison snarls at her, the bitch.

They’re sitting in the back alley behind the coffee shop, Madison being on trash duty again. (At Coven Café, waitresses get to throw the trash out every time they’re uncivil to a customer. Obviously, that means Madison gets stuck with it every night.)

(She should have stayed at fucking Starbucks.)

Anyway, they’re sitting on the bench in the smelly, gross back alley. Like every bit of having a service job when you hate pretty much everyone you meet, it sucks, but at least here no one is bothering them. It’s not even six p.m. yet, and already the sun is setting behind the city buildings and lamp posts are lighting out all over town. Queenie tightens up her coat while texting whoever she’s dating this week. Madison is smoking through a pack of cigarettes she only got yesterday to keep warm, because she wore her sluttiest skirt to work today, for reasons totally unrelated to the cute quiet girl who keeps coming back to the coffee shop every afternoon, of course. (According to Queenie, if Madison quit smoking, she could probably leave C.C. altogether and survive on her acting gigs, but what do you want, a girl loves her bad decisions.)

“He’s so fucking lame. How long do you think he spent last night watching Youtube napkin-folding tutorials? Like, god, Kyle, way to show her how gay you are.”

“Yeah sure, Madison. Hey, by the way, I like your new outfit, how much money did you spend on that?” Queenie asks.

“Shut up, it’s completely different,” Madison says. She did not buy these clothes to impress the cute girl, because that would be ridiculous and pathetic, just like she does not think about how the girl’s hair looks like liquid honey when the sun shines on it through the window, or how pretty her dimples are when she laughs open-mouthed at one of Kyle’s bad lines, or how much better her lips look when she smirks at Madison’s snide comments.

“Of course.”

Madison keeps up the sullen silence though, before Queenie sighs, finally pockets her phone and says, “You know what would help your situation?”

“Hum, hello, did I ask for your dumb advice?”

“If you actually showed her how gay you are,” Queenie says. “Also maybe - maybe -  stop insulting her.”

“Hard pass,” Madisons says, and she throws her cigarette butt to the ground, crushes it under her heel, and leaves with a brisk pace.

“Bitch, just because you’re Los Angeles trash doesn’t mean the street is too!” Queenie yells at her retreating back. Madison doesn’t even turn around when she gives her the finger.

Queenie sighs.

november.

When she clocks in today, Kyle is already here, leaning on his elbows pressed against the wooden counter, flirting with her. Her, who leans on her elbows too, close to him, chuckles and blushes and hides her face behind chestnut brown hair.

Madison rolls her eyes and hip checks him as she goes by. “Go away, you’re not even paid for these extra hours.”

“Maybe I just really love making coffee,” he says. “Model employee, three months running, yay.”

When the girl smiles up at him, she crinkles her eyes. Madison pretends to gag.

“What a nerd,” she complains when his back is turned to fiddle with the coffee machine or whatever. “I swear to god, it’s like working with an overexcited puppy. He’s that close to pissing all over our hardwoods.”

“I think he’s nice,” the cute girl says. “I mean, isn’t that the whole point of independent coffee shops? Having friendly waiters, not being rushed by twenty people who want their Venti Caramel Macchiato?”

“Nah, the whole point is attracting all of you lame hipsters who want the Starbucks experience but not, like, to support capitalism or whatever,” Madison replies. “By the way, the homeless guy up front called, he wants his twenty layers of jackets back.”

The girl looks at her like she shot her puppy. Madison shrugs. “What? I’m just being honest!”

“Madison, stop bullying our best customer,” Kyle jokes, trying to come back to the counter. (She sneers at him. He is wise enough to be afraid of her and stay back. So he is not completely stupid then.)

“So, May, what do you want?” she asks the other girl.

“That’s not even close to my name,” she says, but she grins anyway. Weirdo. “One Iced Coffee for Zoe, with a little caramel twirl thingie, please.”

“Sure, Zack,” Madison says, and grabs her cup with a little more strength than necessary. Zoe snorts. She probably has some sort of insult kink. She and Kyle are going to have the worst sex ever.

She’s already onto the next customer when Zoe sees the shape of the caramel twirl on her order, laughs, and shouts thanks, Madison! from the other end of the room. Madison rolls her eyes at her and totally doesn’t blush.

(Kyle pesters her for an entire hour the next time their shift coincide for her to tell him what she drew on that poor girl’s cup because something you’ve probably never seen in your entire, pathetic life was not clear enough for him. It’s only when Zoe comes up to her and says her thanks for the capussyno that he gets it, and no, Madison does not laugh at that terrible, terrible pun.)

december.

“Hi Madison, did you have a nice Christmas?” Zoe asks as Madison is crouched under the counter looking for vanilla extract to serve that twink who only drinks decaf half-soy half-low fat milk extra whip cream double shot vanilla lattes.

She stands up so fast she hits her head against the cabinet and lets out a slew of swear words that would make her mother ashamed. (Or proud. Madison’s family isn’t exactly filled with role models. She’s a chainsmoking wannabe actress who works at the only coffee shop whose owner pities her enough to accept her constantly insulting customers. Of course she’s got mommy issues.) Her head hurts, and her dignity too.

“Madison, are you hurt?” the other girl asks, with real worry in her voice, because she’s a saint. Kyle and her sure deserve each other.

“No, everything is fine, I’m peachy,” Madison bites back with as much venom as she can muster.

It takes a few seconds for her vision to work again, once the blurriness of tears passes. When that happens, Madison discovers that sometimes in the last minute or so, Zoe bent over the counter to look at her closer. She puts her hand on top of Madison’s head, fingers ghosting over the spot where she hit herself, digging into her hair slightly. Her face is so close now, brown eyes blown wide open, pink lips slightly parted, thin eyebrows raised, and this is usually the point at which Madison finds something disparaging to say about her, like how measly her face looks, but her brain shortcuts again, thanks for that, and the only sound to get past her is a shrill whine.

“Shit, do you have a concussion or something?” she says, and steps back, wriggling her hand. As Zoe moves away, Madison’s big sapphic meltdown stops. Mostly. “I don’t know anything about medicine, I’m a History major, I should look for a doctor-”

She suddenly remembers that she’s Madison Montgomery and doesn’t get tongue-tied around anyone, ever. “Stop, you weirdo! I’m fine, god, you’re not my mom.”

“Oh,” Zoe says.

“Yeah,” Madison says. There’s a very awkward pause before she speaks up again. “So, I’m gonna serve this guy his stupid drink.”

“Yeah, sure.”

She gives her one last look as she walks away, and Zoe is tugging her sleeves above her pale hands, looking down in a way that makes silky hair cover most of her face. Madison finally makes that decaf half-soy half-low fat milk - something, calls for Behold, what kind of a name is that, ugh, who looks at her like he’s deeply unimpressed.

“Oh honey,” he says. “That was physically painful.”

“Excuse me, I don’t take advice from people who wear cardigans,” Madison snarks. “So shoo, Doctor Love.”

He scoffs at her and rolls his eyes but leaves anyway. When she gets back to the front, Zoe is gone already, taken care of by Queenie, who’s very unapologetic about it all. Madison bangs her head against the wooden counter.

january.

This time, Madison doesn’t even try to intercede when Kyle rushes to serve Zoe the instant she appears with a friendly expression, a gush of cold wind and a few snowflakes. She is done with this whole crush affair. Done. She is not going to embarrass herself striving to get Zoe’s attention anymore. New year, new her. She got the number of this very hot guy during a New Year’s Eve party, with long blonde hair and a smile like a shark’s, so she has no reason to pine anymore when she’s got herself a regular booty call. Queenie told her she was an idiot, but what does Queenie know about anything, really?

She watches as Kyle scribbles down a pick-up line on her to-go cup in a way he thinks is subtle and passes it to Zoe. She fully expects her to chuckle, again, as she always does when he uses one of his dork moves. It would make for a perfect picture: seven a.m., the sun rising, the snow falling softly out their window, your classic boy-meets-girl story.

Instead, Zoe says, “Oh, Kyle, that’s very flattering, but uh, you know,” and bites her lip.

Kyle looks at her blankly. “Uh, what do I know? I don’t know anything.”

“It’s true,” Madison calls from where she’s sitting at one of their booths. “He knows nothing.”

(So, yes, she was supposed to stay silent and let it be. How can she let opportunities like that pass her by though? She has a reputation. A reputation as a queen bitch.)

Zoe jolts at the sound of her voice, and Kyle glares, which, kudos to him, Madison didn’t think he was capable of that. The other girl moves a bit closer to him and speaks softly like that doesn’t make Madison lean closer to listen, which once again is not a desperate move, alright, she might have given up on Zoe, but she still feeds on drama.

“I’m gay, Kyle,” Zoe says. She gives him a small, pitying smile.

Kyle’s mouth falls apart on a silent oooh. Madison’s brain goes blank. Again.

She probably did get a concussion from that hitting-the-counter thing after all.

“Oooh,” Kyle finally lets out. “I see.” To his credit, he is back to his normal, cheerful persona already. “Do you want Madison’s number then?”

Madison chokes on her coffee and starts coughing desperately. Zoe turns back to look at her like a deer caught in the headlights, then at Kyle, then at her again. They both start to shake their heads no, but Kyle grins at them like he’s the Chester cat and he caught a canary and that canary happens to be Madison and she doesn’t know where the fuck she is going with that metaphor but he jots her number down on a napkin anyway.

When Zoe runs away with her to-go cup and Madison can process words again, she stomps towards Kyle, intent on saying something scathing to destroy his ego, but instead asks, “How did you even get my number?”

february.

“Madison Montgomery, are you the one drawing dicks on the chalkboard? The chalkboard outside the shop? The chalkboard outside the shop that we installed yesterday to promote our seasonal drinks?” Cordelia asks.

“What? No,” Madisons scoffs. “Why are you asking me this? Is this some kind of profiling issue? This is clearly biphobia. We’re not sex-obsessed skanks, you know.”

Misty snorts, because she’s a terrible manager.

“Madison,” Cordelia warns and does that thing when she looks at you and you feel like she sees all the dark, terrible secrets you’re hiding.

“What? It’s not me! Do you even have proof? Are you going around asking people-”

“Hi guys,” Zoe says as she comes in, her face almost entirely covered with scarf and beanie and hair except for her reddish nose. Cordelia smiles at her more warmly than she ever smiled at Madison, which is bullshit, since she’s been Madison’s boss for months and she’s known Zoe all of three weeks. (Although, maybe being Madison’s boss for months is reason enough to look disapproving all the time.)

She steps up to the counter and the other waitress on duty starts making her usual order without any prompting. It's still an Iced Coffee, despite it being freezing cold outside, and Madison doesn’t know how she didn’t figure out the whole lesbian thing sooner.

Then again, maybe she’s not the brightest bulb around her. Yesterday, when Zoe smiled at her as she carried a tray full of empty cups to the counter (seriously, it’s so easy to bring them when you’re done drinking, why are people like this), she tripped and almost broke it all. Queenie is still giving her shit about that.

“Hey, that’s a nice dress, Zoe!” Misty says and smiles her special Misty Day smile that is like staring directly into the sun.

“Oh, thanks! I got it on sale at a…” Zoe hesitates and glances at Madison worriedly. “A thrift shop.”

Madison cackles at that because Zoe is making it all too easy for her to mock her (the others waiters call it flirting, which is why they are all single and desperate). Misty speaks up before she has an opportunity to talk though. “It looks good on you! Doesn’t it, Madison?”

Her mouth opens and closes without a sound. She lets out: “It doesn’t come from the Gap, so, it’s always an improvement.”

“Aw, thanks, Madison, that’s very big of you,” Zoe says with fake cheer. “Really liked your penmanship from this morning out here too. Obviously the proportions were kind of wrong, but self-portraits are tough, aren’t they?”

Cordelia twirls around to face Madison with an I knew it expression on her face, Misty cracks up, and Zoe slips away from the shop with a winning smile. Well played, Benson.

(Later, the waitress will harass her about sexual tension and nonsense, and Madison will stomp and say why are you obsessed with me, and the staff will find something else to yammer on about.)

march.

Zoe is back in the corner booth at C.C., reading some boring History book with a ridiculously long title about witches, whose name Madison would usually never remember since she’s not a nerd, yet somehow knows because Zoe is really passionate about it and keeps calling it Six Women of Salem: The Untold Story of the Accused and Their Accusers in the Salem Witch Trials instead of That Nerdy Salem Book Thing like a normal person, and unfortunately, Madison listens to her. It takes three hours before Madison can clock out, and feels like three years. This is not unusual, as she always hated service jobs. What is unusual is how, even though it is only two p.m., she doesn’t hurry out of the shop to go literally anywhere else and instead slides next to the other girl and peers over her shoulder.

“Ooh, gory shit,” she says, and Zoe doesn’t even turn around, which is ungrateful since Madison looks fucking stunning today, just leans backward on Madison and hums.

Madison finds herself with a shoulder full of chestnut hair and mango shampoo smell. Her heart starts beating like a drill. It’s really annoying. She can’t even be angry properly, though. The other day Queenie told her she got almost tolerable now that she’s in lesbians with someone, which, no.

She sighs dramatically until Zoe is done with her chapter and lays down her book to pay full attention to her. By which she means roll her eyes at her and makeout. When Queenie hurls napkins at them so that they stop being so fucking disgusting, ugh, Zoe traps Madison’s hand between her thigh so she doesn’t give her coworkers the finger.

When her boss Cordelia comes in to kick them out, they have sex at Zoe’s place (twice) and talk about her next audition around Thaï takeout afterward. They even agree to watch The Tudors so Zoe can complain about historical inaccuracies and Madison can get turned on by the hot people and shut Zoe up accordingly.

All in all, it’s not so bad.

Now with a part 2!

[fmdxjerome]

hello people from old and new! naomi is back in action with her son jerome. i’ve been stuck in my sisters house for the last weeks of my absence because she went on vacation and i had to take care of a sick rabbit who peed everywhere. i might have a disease now at the amount he bit me but what can you do. im joking. you might ask “but naomi doesnt your sister have wifi” yes she do but i’m an anxious wreck so spending my days on a first floor apartment  with my sister on the other side of the world w an infected foot had me fucke d upppp boiii but now i’m back in my own home and my sister + her boyfriend are safely home!! foot all fine!! and everyone is calm again!! so!! i can return with a good heart. i’ll be sliding in the dms of the people who bear emoticon’ed me 600 years ago and bc i suck w introducing myself to new people i’ll just hi!!!!! i think when i wake up i’m gonna do a “bio reading” marathon as i write bc i need to appreciate. also shit i need more threads wow i suck might see me replying to some open starters and def need to get back to plotting bc there are some people i’ve been dying to thread with ;^;

its like 6am now so i might b heading 2 bed now but under the cut there will be a reintroduction to jerome (one i promised in januari i believe) as im rewriting his bio (no major things change really its just minor things nd its time for an upgrade) so yes! hello (ims will come tomorrow as well ;3;)

also fact. mullet daddy jaebum is jerome rn dont drag him dont @ him its gone before you know it. probs after idolized its a look tho wow i love- a chic farmer (... the short bangs are tragic tho jerome honey i kno u liked them on wren but ur not wren. jerome: but i- me: no. this this not this jerome: :( ok fine me: fuego 

anyway before i pass out here is reintroduction. the triggers are; adoption, racism themes??? like yeah ok!! apologize if this is shit. hope everyone is having a good day though you all are great!

Jerome Gauthier aka Yuddy

-Anti idol

-Has an okay reputation but that’s because he’s smart about things.

-BC eyeing him tho *eyes fake friends with good reputation for him to hang out with* (hmu for fake friend plots. funny the person w the best rep of all actually likes jerome. bless jisoos christ. guess that praying on knees worked out in the end huh jerome. /dont/ sainthood is waiting)

-Talented™. (ask him to write songs for you) (Actually have a few songs in my library i want him to write but not sing so *eyes*)

-Passionate as fuck don’t mess with him in the studio (passionate all over tbh)

-Adopted and in search of his bloodlines

-Hoe but not really

-Actually, scrap that. Nicknames him JerHOEme

-Is actually lovely

-But acts like a shit

-Slips up and is soft to people sometimes before being a complete and utter asshole the next second

-bc soft jerome whOMST i only know deMON

-Suave Fuckboy who’s nonchalant about everything

-French™

-Will call you baby at some point in your life

-Signature smirk

-Egotistic???? Narcissistic??? a lil bit don’t stroke his ego

-Secretive™. not much info on his time in france

-Secretly a dad without children (except for his actual biological son insoo aka chorizo sausage who he goes to play ball with- i mean work on songs in the studio. seriously catch him picking up his son from soccer practice i mean shit no i mean- ok insoo is really his son dont fight me on this.)

-And also has a daughter an Oriental shorthair cat called Edith who he is so soft with he kicks out girls to cuddle with her. (one meow and he’s home)

- we support WISH hating jerome in this household. please people who have girls in WISH dont let them like him (or be a rebel and go against the mothers wishes but you’ve been warned)

-Dont let him get in your pants too like ask wren you dont want that (or i mean with the list of kinks i peeped maybe idk who am i to say what your muse wants or does not want idk im just protecting people from satan)

-Unlikely he’ll get in any pants now anyway tho bc he a proud shopper at papa juliens pizza and y’all some other brand type ish domino lookin asses NAH *throws hands up* rome’s in the house (no but guys. this is his soulmate THIS IS HIM. dISgUStiNG- )

-In 2016 interview took him out of context and it looks like he hates all idol rappers but is not true. He just doesn’t like companies making rap out to be like this thing you can do if you’re pretty and you can’t sing and he doesn’t like it when said pretty idols know nothing of it. he gets the grind but will side eye (benjy nd jerome already have a rivalry bc of this shit thank u interviewer)

-Dating scandals?? EHH. He almost had one with a Japanese model called Momo in the beginning of his career but BC did well of spinning them as friends and he legit had one with his ex last october which?????????? shit she touched his *spoiler* and it was *spoiler* . BC about to ban him from fashion shows damn. yoonah and him have to go to paris fashion week quick

-BC has yet to force him into a relationship tho. but damn he gonna be angry when that ever happens yoo. 

-Studied to become a cinematographer. Now is annoying as fuck during recording MV’s bc he butts into everything (BUT thats why his his mvs so AESTHETIC. eye for beauty bois)

-Holler at ya boi if you want a nice mv he’s involved like that

-Also to the girls who have been in an MV with Jerome.. know he probably flirted with you between takes bc during he’s grade a professionalism but he still a ho

-Actual catlady no questions asked (he feeds stray cats and gets cut up by edith when she smells other cats on him rip)

-Actual wife material no questions asked (to quote the great Halit Yilmaz during that time Jerome stood in the kitchen for hours making baklava and other Turkish treats for Halit’s Eid al-Fitr: “Shit, Jerome if you were a girl i’d marry you in a heartbeat.” and its true. we would ALL marry jerome. who says no is lying. )

-Smooth™

-Ok the ego thing btw its weird its an act but hes weird about it dont ask

idk what else to write ok short rundown of his bio as again i’m writing a new one and i cringe every time i look at my old one. im probs forgetting a lot but EYO ITS 6AM WHO CARES

CHILDHOOD age 0 to 10

-Born to a single mom who got fucked over by a smash nd dash dad. (we side eye Ok Chanwook in this household.)

-Moms family discouraged her from taking care of him herself so putting up for adoption it is.

-Very emotional not ok mom boram cry a lot pls. (got v angry too like boi if she ever sees chanwook again he can change his name to no dick larry)

-Adopted by a French couple called Lucas and Daphné (previously named Annelies). pretty kool peeps

-JK racist assholes who fetishize jerome a lot. PLEASE. the yellow fever runs deep. take him away from them,

-Raised in a small town in France and knew 0 Asians growing up. so thats nice

-Loves his adoptive grandpa to death tho (who’s he named after u3u)

-Actually hates the rest lol

-Ok uncle Rémy pretty cool bc he laughs at teen!Jerome shit talking his parents and aunt Camille. She a sweety ;3; a bit odd but a sweety #stanauntCamille

-Basically the people on the Gauthier side and born from Jerome and Clemintine are ok, the rest is shit (except for his dad Lucas. He a Gauthier but he shit)

-Junior/Senior relationship w granpda ;3; “Pépé!!” “Junior!!” *tiny jerome swings around grandpa’s neck* LOVE

-Grandma passed when he was 9. (he loved her very much and would always show her his drawings on her bed ;-;)

-Hard time adjusting at first when he was a tiny toddler. had a lisp talking french. ;3; baby rome

-young jerome had a bad case of the abandonment issues he literally held onto his dads leg for like 30 minutes before the teacher finally peeled him away from him. my smol boi

-Elephants. remember this. is important. /sob

-TLDR; biological mom didnt want to loose him. adoptive parents and dad are fucks. grandpa is kool. jerome had a good childhood until he didnt. thank u ignorance

TEEN YEARS age 10 to 20

-middle school very nice

-j FUCKING KKKKK EMO JEROME INBOUNDDDD

-kids are mean. teens are mean. young!jerome v lonely

-honestly he had no friends. except for like maybe this one kid on his sport called mattheo but he kinda a weeb so uhhhh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-the time comes that he feels uncomfortable with everything korean. he already learned korean along side french and english when he was growing up but now distances himself from further learning. he clings to french culture a lot and even to this day he refers to himself as french and european, and rarely refers to himself as korean or asian.

-feels disconnected from both though. its like.. his parents took his korean culture away from him by using it for their own amusement. it was not his to have basically. and french- a lot of people around him give the vibe he’s not “allowed” to call himself fully french. they see him as korean, korean-french but never just french. he feels very misunderstood. lack of identity and just not fitting in

-around this time (or earlier i’m musing still) his cousin Antonin (moms side) kind of fell out on him. like. wow. not good. fucked jerome up a lil. (issues intensify)

-inferiority complex inbound/ is he ok? no he isnt. he starts writing to get his emotions out.

-Blessed Freddy rolled in teen jerome’s life like: guess we need to do history homework together jerome: aren’t you gonna make a ‘do my homework bc you’re asian’ joke freddy: why would i jerome:

-they bond over music, freddy is the one who gets him serious about getting into it (we thank our lord freddy for this gift of life we call singer/songwriter jerome. pray to freddy 10 times a day *srry jisoos christ but ur out*)

-literally young jerome would be a great soundcloud artist in this day and age. he was like joji meets rei brown with more of an rnb tinge. he liked ambient because it calmed him.

-in his old bio thats still up bc im a slow writer his old name was some dumb shit like l.only DUMB its romeles now (get it.. jeROME LESlie gauthier. im smart)

-OK IM GONNA GO QUICKER NOW

-eMO FOR A LONG TIME BC OF LONELINESS AND OTHERING FREDDY IS HIS BEACON OF HOPE WE LOVE FREDDY IN THIS HOUSEHOLD!!!!!!!

-had a big ass fall out with his parents when he was around 15? was like “UHHH FUCK Y’ALL” and moved in with his grandpa (he was very disrespectful like damn boy but you know what. i support)

-best decision of his life because grandpa v lonely after his wife died and Jerome^2 is… so soft.

-Jerome dancing/singing to old tunes and being engrossed with old movies

-Learning how to cook ;3;

-I mean bc his middle and highschool were in Laval he spend a lot of his time w his grandpa already so he already had a bed and ;-; #jerome^2

-Halit rolls into his life. Braces, huge smile, lil prepubescent stash ohmygod. My child.

-BLANC is born. Freddy/Jerome/Halit’s musical trio. Stan the Three Musketeers

-Found his first best friend and a purpose in Freddy. Found a home in Halit. (sob)

-Finds solace in rnb and hiphop. People start noticing him because of it. Writes songs and performs them in café’s. Found his niche. 15 to 19 where his “best”  years

-THE BIG MOVE. After a concerned halit mom, a proud freddy mom and a “WHAT THE FUCK JEROME NO DONT GO” jerome mom they pack their bags and PARIS HERE WE COME

-Enter ex who haunts his life, Seo Yumi aka Marie (now model, v pretty, makes me cry)

-Spots her in the summer doing yoga in the park and boi he an assman so he got fucked up (jk he saw her face and was like wHAT love at first sight

-enrolls in film school, meets her there again and wow falls in love hard like wow calm down boy

-Dating~~~v possessive not good at ALL cALM DOWN JEROME

-ok he got his issues nd marie was the first one who openly listened to his problems and understood and made him appreciate his korean heritige bc she’s korean and showed him cultural aspects without the gross fetishizing that came with his parents and he just- he got intense ok. he already got a v intense personality so- still not good tho he needs to dial it down

-she thought so too and like after a year she was !!!! what the fuck. she is not one for serious relationships but jerome was like ehhh why not in the beginning its v nice to hear nd be seen as the most beautiful ok but then it got suffocating but instead of breaking up with him she kept him around. he a safe haven ya know. reliable. someone to built on later. *i wanna say she also didnt break up w him because his emo stories but marie,,, eh...* (funny tho like she got a thing for bad boys so she just “this is the fifth time you called me beautiful just degrade me lil like choke me idk” and jerome just “w-why would i do that you’re beautiful i dont want to hurt you” ah *looks into the future* ohhowthetableshaveturned.mp4 )

-Marie cheated on him the second she got the chance which was when jerome went to america w his bros

-Got offered a job as a songwriter when in ny. Wouldnt think he’d take it but after getting kicked out of school for beating the shit out of the guy marie cheated on him with and with marie out of the picture nothing held him back from starting a new life.

-TLDR; emo era. silver era. emo era 2 emo harder

ADULTHOOD age 20 to now

-Seoul make way for the rise of YUDDY™

-the name yuddy is from the film days of being wild. the character is kinda yuddy-ish too so he saw the film again and yep. thats my name

-Fuck_love.mp3

-Visits his orphanage. they like “nah boi u aint got no papers boi”

-Parents can give him access to his birthmother btw, aren’t doing it lol

-EMO

-Drinks. Sleeps around. Gets a reputation. You kno how it is. (gr8 ride tho. highly recommend. 5 out of 5 stars on yelp)

-SMASH ND DASH. Chanwook is that u??????

-One girl who he got with multiple times reminded him of Marie tho and that fucked him up for a bit (PSST ITS A PLOT WINK SO IF YA GIRL OF AGE IN THE 2013′S HMU BC ITS DRAMATIC HE GHOSTED THE SHIT OUT OF HER)

-Writes a lot of songs, a few for BC (knight baes). BC like *eye emoji* who dat boi who him iz

-Gets sign w BCreate and is like eyy life pretty good

-but lmao he debut and oh who’s that pretty girl promoting that lipstick?? oh.. its marie ;3;

-imfine.jpeg

-Joins main label and literally joins w a blessing stream limbo on spotify

-wgm era was a great era of jerome lmty his hair was great, shared cute personal things, manager was happy, slept with his best friend, was married to a sweet beautiful girl ya know the good stuff  👍 no im not crying you are

-triple fantasy era was awful we dont talk about that he looked like his brother and i’m still emotional about him wow. 

-instagram is a great song

-Interviewer: u mention an ex in ur song tell me more Jerome: *SWEATS*  

-Marie: my short hair DOES look pretty thank u babe ur red hair was cute too <3<3

-The fact she linked to him now is spook

-But ok he still flirty, still daring, still yuddy™ but definitely less of the whole “sleeping around” thing now bc he… he uhh closetoyou.mp3

TLDR; he turned into his dad but romeo is rising AND HE IS SCARED!!!!!

also never forget jerome is the messiest king in this ok non y’all are as messy as him. he fucked his ex’s friend oK THERE IS NOTHING MORE MESSY. dONT COME FOR HIS CROWN

[punkwhodrinkstea-blog]

Generation  Neglect and Neglected

Hey guys, I wrote this a while back but I have a lot of good posts on the last site I used for my blog so I’ll be sprinkling a few on here even though they were technically written weeks or months ago, heck maybe even a year ago. Anyway I have more writing to do which will be posted immediately after this :)  Enjoy.

Oh it's good to be back. It feels like it's been a long while since I've posted anything for some reason. So my depression has actually been pretty nice to me lately, I have even been able to sleep normally-ish. Usually in order for me to sleep I have to tire myself out or stay up until 4 or 5 am or I just lay there while my depression consumes me. But lately I've been going to bed around 2am with little dark thoughts. I would like to be optimistic and say that maybe I'm getting better but last time I thought that I went to bed shaking and woke up sweating. Anyway folks I have a topic that has been stirring up ever since the younger generations got smart phones and social media and the generation who raised them got alcohol and lost their motivation. So let's get started. In case you didn't know but for those people who have kids in early college or younger, those parents are called "Generation Disconnect" and it's not hard to imagine why. For example there's a whole world of social media and technology to connect with people that generation Disconnect doesn't fully understand and even if they did, it's easy for teenagers, young adults and even kids to hid their actions, words and reputations from their parents on social media. I'm a pretty good example, however I did have a social life... still don't really but instead of social media I took to Gaming. I've easily spent over 30k hours in the digital worlds of gaming and where were my parents or older siblings? I don't know and I didn't care. I learned to think without them, I learned to think for myself and see things differently, I made relationships through games and did things that my family didn't think was tangible or even possible, I was growing up in a different world from them. After years of doing this I had a completely different mind set and thought pattern from my family, they were... Disconnected. I see a video game and I see people, community, relationships, problems with logical solutions and I saw my friends. My parents have no idea that I have a secret blog, they didn't know I like to write until a week ago, they didn't know how many online relationships I have. None of this was real to them until one day one of my gaming buddies from the USA came up here to Canada to visit. You should have seen their faces to see this guy who I have been gaming with for about 5 years and now here he is, a real person... My parents and their generation is very behind, but its not totally their fault. I mean making friends and meaningful lasting relationships through a game or through the internet was even a thing back in their day. One time I was at a family reunion and everyone was talking about sports and I mentioned that I didn't care for sports so my uncle (big sports fan) asked me what it is I like to do. So I told him I spend my time Gaming and he asked how much I play (this was back in grade 11 so I had a lot of spare time). I perked up and said... always. I told him I play night and day which was true. He then asked if the noise from the TV keep people up at night. So then I had to explain the whole story. I explained that I have a headset with full surround sound a mic, I play in my room alone in the dark with an expensive computer not a Wii or Xbox, I play for competition and socializing. I mentioned the social stuff and all the parents fell silence and watched me. I explained all the friends that I have all around the globe and that I play all night through until I am falling asleep at my desk. This is where I get to the point of this story. He then said out loud to everyone who was now listening, "wow we always hear about these punk but I never thought I'd be related to one haha"... he laughed and I walked away. The point is, this stuff online has been fantasy to the last few generations, even my older brother doesn't understand... and he's a computer programmer. So yeah guys there is this great wall of technology that has divided the people who don't know how to use technology for socializing and those who do. There are teens sending nudes while their parents still believe they have perfect kids. There are people being bullied through the internet and no adults know. There are real, genuine friendships and couples being made in digital space. There are people like me who aren't allowed to speak their mind freely because it might be dark or too blunt and honest or maybe we feel like a problem or an embarrassment so we hide in the digital world where no one can hurt us and if they try then we disappear again. Meanwhile the generation that raised my generation (I'm 19 yrs old FYI) gives us stuff like phones, video games,  Netflix, alcohol and even porn and then says shoe, go have fun on your own. I think that a very large portion of the last few generations have given up trying to keep up with technology and the new way of connecting with others so they have also given up on trying to connect with their own kids and the kids have the ultimate tools to be two faced (or 3 faced or 4, etc). Once again I can be an example, who I am here on my blog is the real me, I don't have to hide anything and I am proud to say I have found some people in my life that I get to be the real me with but at home or with most people, I am not the same.  We hide some things or twist things or whatever to fit with what we think is best expected of us depending on the scenario. I find that people on the internet that can hide behind their Username or Gamertag are really more of their true selves then they are in real life, let me explain. When I say something here I have no filter, nothing to hold me accountable, no reason to treat other people well, I can truly be who I want to be with nearly no limits. Online I can treat someone badly and my reputation isn't ruined because, who's gonna find out? no one. We see this a lot, people fight with words all the time online in chats, forms, comment sections, etc. They are revealing who they really are and I can already bet that their integrity sucks. Now my girlfriend and her family say I am a genuinely "good" person, that's nice. Now I guess they must be right because even online where no one is watching, I still treat other people with respect. Not to pat myself on the back but I think I can say that I have fairly decent integrity. Another example is that when I walk around in real life at my church, work or school (when I was in school) I keep my head down and my nose in my own business because I don't really feel like I belong but meet me online... WELCOME TO MY WORLD! I am free here and I can be myself especially since no one is watching, well actually my girlfriend reads my blog but I am free to be myself with her so it makes no difference. I think a lot of other youth take advantage of this whole "no one is watching" thing, they can do anything and get away with it. Now old people try and scare young people by saying, "even when you delete it *insert social media site*  still has a copy and can see everything you do." yeah sure, that's true but it's not like Facebook is gonna call up their parents and tell them all about how noddy their teen kid has been. Now I wanna talk about how those of us younger folk have neglected others or just kinda kept our distance from those who are suppose to be close to us. I have already told you about how I neglected my family by running off into the gaming world but what causes us to do this? I did it because I didn't feel wanted and I felt like a problem, it quickly evolved into me feeling so out of place that I didn't even fit in with my own family anymore. I think that a popular reason for my generation and younger do this because we don't think our behavior or desires would be approved by our parents. Lastly a good reason is because we do it because this is just how it works these days. I mean is there a better way to talk to all your friends? not really, plus this way you can filter even what they see, you can have the image that you want. The only cost is your integrity, genuine loving relationships and self respect. No big deal. Speak'n of which, where does that leave us when it comes to loving relationships? When the youth and the people who are suppose to be teaching them are so disconnected and sometimes completely absent. What happens? Well just take a good look around. Who seems to be teaching kids about relationships? Movies, TV and Porn... that's right folks. Chick flicks generally show a good deep trusting relationship which is very rare mean while lots of TV and of course porn show the next generation that the physical relationship is expendable. I know lots of people and I see lots of posts on the internet saying that they want that relationship where they have "total trust", "feel safe with one another", "tell each other our secrets" and blah blah blah. However I know almost no one who is actually willing to fight for the other person, no one is willing to fight with each other to settle a difference for the sake of their relationship. But no one hesitates to climb into bed with someone. The point I am making is that my generation's idea of a relationship is crap! And the last generation didn't do such a great job at being "role models". A long time ago there were 2 parents and 4 kids not 2 kids and 4 parents. My generation has few mentors other than our media... which is full of unrealistic expectations not to mention they are morally wrong in most way. Just saying. Next is our mental health, yay fun. So according the posters on the school walls and a quick google search, 1 in 5 people in North America have a mental illness. That is the biggest joke I've ever heard, from my experience and my introverted observational skills I would say 4 in 5 people have a mental illness. A good wise person once told me that if you're "okay" in this world then there's something wrong with you. They meant that if you feel like everything is ok and life is a rainbows and unicorns then you're either really dumb or you agree with all the immoral crap that happens around us everyday. However why are we like this? Why is this such a big problem in today's world? Well scroll up to what I just wrote. My generation and the last few generations have neglected each other, we don't feel loved or valued or accepted. We don't have a mentor or even a decent parent figure to go to for help. We can't be ourselves with anyone these days without getting judged and burned for it later. So folks, I'm almost done here. I was trying to think of a solution to our problem but we can't just eradicate social media or just stop using it. It's a heavy method of communication and self expression. The best idea I can think of is to simply be a good genuine person but then I realized that a lot of people don't have good role models on what that looks like and who's gonna teach them? I was lucky to be born and raised to go to church, though at first I hated other people... still mostly do but life goes on. I have pretty much been studying God and how to be a good person my whole life, I have Jesus' hand book on being good in my back pocket to reference but a lot of people don't, they either rejected the idea of Jesus or they simply haven't been given a good chance to give him or his teachings a chance for themselves. Now I understand if you don't believe in God or Jesus but you must admit that if we all lived by his teachings then this world would be a much nicer place. Anyway that's a different topic. I gotta get some other work done and then sleep. Sorry it was so long and I hope it was somewhat organized but I don't write here for your luxury I write here to let my thoughts run wild and sometimes it comes out smoothly, other times not so much. Lastly I'll be revealing my new social media and blog on tumblr which is all acting as an extension of this blog. Also I will be posting pictures of "my world" on this new blog. My girlfriend once mentioned that some of my graphic design stuff could be used for the blog and for banners and what not at the top of the page or whatever. I thought I'd take advantage of that space to show an accurate yet artistic view of my world. Weather it be a bunch of tea mugs on my desk or the fact that my gaming keyboard is half covered in dust while the half that's actually used for gaming is squeaky clean. Anyway folks, I don't have time to edit this and I should stop typing now. Commencing Radio Silence...  *static sounds*.....