#wouldve beaten him up for pulling that shit on me

[thelastsaiyanprincess]

hi! what’s your favorite dbz saga? i’m just curious! i think mine is the cell saga, mainly bc of gohan’s big moment but also because perfect cell had me about to act up LMAO

ohoho i'm SO glad you asked!!!!!

*inhales*

my FAVORITE sagas will always be the saiyan saga and the frieza saga. and that's because if you watch the series from the VERY beginning of the story, OG dragon ball, everything that happens during saiyan arc hits SO MUCH HARDER. in OGDB they establish the strongest earth warriors, all the training they've gone through, and how difficult it was for young goku to defeat all the villains! esp tien and piccolo, who were established as formidable foes! then when saiyan saga comes, we find out the reason kid goku was so OP was because he's a fucking ALIEN WARRIOR & his brother comes and basically solos everyone?! then when mf vegeta and nappa pull up the z fighters stand no chance, they drop one by one, the fighters we thought were the strongest just fucking DIE, and they couldn't just rely on using the dragon balls to bring everyone back because PICCOLO WAS GONE TOO. the stakes were SO MUCH HIGHER and mfs actually took shit seriously!!!

then ofc there's the frieza saga, which (in my humble opinion) is the BEST fight in all of dragon ball except for broly. frieza is also my fave dragon ball villain of all time. and i say that because again, stakes were high, we didn't fucking know if goku could defeat frieza for sure despite all the training, namek was ABOUT TO EXPLODE and these mfs are fighting for their damn lives, lightning exploding around them, magma splashing at their feet, EVERYTHING WAS SO FUCKING INTENSE AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN GOKU BECOMES SUPER SAIYAN???? theeee super saiyan legend??? that first transformation was COLD AF & nothing will ever compare to that!!!!

speaking of tranformations, thats one of the reasons i like early DBZ more than late dbz/dbs. no transformations, no colorful hair, no power ups, mfs had to rely on all their training and experience to win and the fights kept you on your toes because you truly did not know how things would play out.

oh and lastly another reason early DBZ rocks is because we get evil vegeta. he's bad af, killing like its nothing, solos young goku (&honestly he wouldve beaten him easily if goku's friends hadnt been there) and is just a ruthless fucking bastard. i'm so in love with him. he could snap my spine and i'd die smiling. redemption arc vegeta is cool too but saiyan/namek arc vegeta has my whole fucking heart.

UGH! i fucking love this show.

[all-things-mlqc]

Hi I love reading your answers for Gavin background story!!! Tbh I don't really play the game as it's expensive af but I'm really really invested with the premise of the game and the storyline so I read a lot. If you don't mind me asking, since I don't really play the game, do you mind telling me about the dialogue "I'm gonna call the police" then Gavin covered mc's mouth and said "I'm the police" is it from main chapters or one of Gavin's date? Thanks!

Hey there! Thank you so much ❤️ The game can be very very expensive if you want a lot of karmas so I completely get that. I’ve spent more than I should’ve on this game tbh but the stories are so good and every little piece of information you have helps with the main story as well so I’ve let it slide 👉🏻👈🏻 I know, I’m awful.

The scene you are speaking of is from Gavin’s Starry Date, the very first date I did in the game actually. Here’s a quick summary of the entire date for you~

MC had an important shoot in the morning that covered women’s safety so she intended to ask Gavin about the topic, knowing he knows many different self defense methods/techniques. However, Gavin hadn’t responded to any texts or calls the past few days due to being on a mission so MC eventually gave up. It was only the night before the shoot when Gavin called to see if she was awake. When MC answered, he told her he was in the front of her building and to meet him downstairs. After meeting up with Gavin, she asked what needed but he turned the question around on her since she had tried contacting him so many times the past few days. MC responded, telling him it was about a shoot she had but they already solved the problem. Upon hearing this, he figured everything was ok and handed her a helmet, telling her to get on sparky go vrooooom.

He took her to a mountain where the stars were brilliantly visible in the night sky. He said she had mentioned wanting to go star gazing at this mountain before so he planned this little field trip for after he got back from his mission. Being a hobby of Gavin’s, he pointed out a few stars and planets and talked about their alignments. He then pointed out Jupiter and said, “You know, no matter how far apart they are, Jupiter always shows up at a set time right next to the moon, standing guard over her”. Gavin then took MCs hand and jumped into the air, lifting off the ground with his evol. Of course this scared the heck out of MC at first since it was unexpected but as soon as they slowed down and hovered in the air, she looked around, amazed at how close the stars seemed. She thanked him for showing her such a beautiful sight, only then realizing how high up they were. Concerned, MC questioned if it was really safe. Gavin, being the cute tease he is, let go of her with one of his hands, causing her to lose balance. Gavin then raised his hand, effortlessly whipping up a gust of wind to steady MC. He held her close telling her, “Just trust me. I’m your Jupiter” thank you imma go cry now.

Landing back on the mountain, MC mentioned the shoot she had in the morning so Gavin asked what it was about. Since this is the part you were curious about, I’ll go ahead and write out exactly what it says in the date for you ;)

MC: The show’s gonna start tomorrow. I feel well-prepared, but I’m still a little unsure...

Gavin: Oh yeah? So what is it about?

MC: Women’s safety. You know, like how women can prevent putting themselves in danger.

Gavin: Tell me about it.

MC: Like avoiding being out at late night or going to somewhere remote...

MC: And don’t go anywhere with strangers, even if they’re old or children or pregnant, ‘cause maybe they’re not what they seem...

As I talked, Gavin suddenly covered my mouth and even pinned both of my hands behind me before I could even react.

MC: (Struggling) ...Mmmpphh...

It seemed like he wasn’t going to let me go. Gavin kept my hands pinned iron-tight behind my body. As I struggled to free my arms, Gavin took his one hand off my mouth, using both hands to keep my arms locked up.

MC: Let go of me... I’ll call the police...

Gavin: ... I am the police damn right you are, now arrest me

MC: ...!!

The harder I struggled, the more forcefully Gavin applied pressure.

What the hell is happening? Am I dreaming? What is he trying to do...

When I was about to burst into tears, Gavin let go of me.

Gavin: ... You would’ve been in danger just now if I were a bad guy.

MC: ...What the!

Gavin turned over and lay beside me.

Gavin: People always let their guard down around people they’re familiar with, and often that’s when danger strikes...

Gavin looked at me and winked. That panic-stricken feeling instantly melted away.

MC: ...Why didn’t you just say that? You didn’t have to...

Gavin plucked a leaf from off my head.

Gavin: I wanted it to sink in.

MC: ...You really freaked me out!

Gavin: Good, you’ll be on your guard then. Remember, stay by my side and no one can ever hurt you.

Gavin’s eyes glittered just like the stars above us. I lost myself in those eyes, and the moment was frozen in time...

And that’s it! I think it’s also important to mention that this was a date that was available from day one, meaning that the date took place before most of the main story. That’s why MC was so startled and afraid. Knowing Gavin now, she would’ve known something was up and would probably put her full trust into him since he’s constantly putting her before himself. But since she didn’t know him near as much as she knows him now, I don’t blame her for being startled. Lord I probably would’ve kicked him in the balls if he tried this shit on me before getting to know him more.

Anywho, hope this answered any questions you had about the date and scene you mentioned! This is still one of my favorite dates because of the whole “Jupiter” thing. I’ve had his contact name as Jupiter since they won’t let me type more 8 characters so rip My Jupiter since day one and I don’t think I could ever change it.

[lolawassad]

Hey I know this is a very specific and it’s totally okay if you don’t or can’t write it, but I was wondering if you can write a one shot where the reader is Octavia in the scene in episode 10 season 2 where she fights the grounder (yk the scene where she tries to prove herself to indra?) but the reader actually wins. Would it be possible to make it a john murphy x reader as well? Like he sees her fighting the grounder and is like god dayyum or sum?

p.s I know this is an exceptionally long request and It’s absolutely understand or if you aren’t willing to write this request!! :)) (btw i’m the person who requested the previous one shot) :))

Awesome awesome!!

Let me write this for u!! <3

Tw : sexism, violence, cussing, mention of NSFW

Im also very awesomely going to make y/n speak another language! I hope you like that little touch

Also i just realised i misunderstood? Reader is fighting the grounder not the grounder octavia is fighting, if you want me to write one differently dont be shy to request one! Ill just write it as reader fighting a grounder and still make it poly? Idk if u'll like it

Octavia x reader x murphy

I walk out of arkadia and notice the grounder have arrived, i see murphy being pushed and walk over, kane is talking to both of them "whats going on" i whisper to octavia who is also standing there "the one thats not skai kru is mad because murphy was there when his village got killed by finn" she whispers to me before putting her arm around my shoulder "kane wants him to say sorry" she scoffs softly.

I giggle which makes murphy's head shoot up to me, the grounder also looks with a smirk "Heya pretty, chit do yu say yu en ai go don some fun" he says before standing before me, he goes to brush a piece of my hair behind my ear but i softly push octavia's hand off of me and stand chest to chest with him, making octavia and murphy scoff loudly.

I smile at him "rot op klojo" i say my innocent smile never leaving my face, his smirk grows thinking i said something nice in return "beautiful girl beautiful language" he says as his hand goes to cup my cheek. Its then i grab his fingers and press "it means fuck off douchebag" i spit before headbutting him "you dont just go up to girls and ask them for fun and then try to touch her hair, motherfucker" i can see kane glare at me from the corner of my eye but indra stops him before he can walk up.

The grounders hand reaches for his forehead and he glares at me "pretty girls like you should just shut their mouths and look pretty, only good for their holes" he gets up and pulls his fist back to punch me with his right hand.

I duck, then throw a punch with my left hand which he blocks with his dominant hand and i giggle before my right hand swings to his face, he doesnt expect this move and it breaks his nose.

He stumbles back a bit before running to me and his hands wrap around my throat "kinky" i say before kicking him in his balls which makes him drop his hands, and then i knee him in his broken nose.

Hes now laying on the ground and i straddle him "do you give up?" I yell into his face, he shakes his head and i punch him "how about now?" And he nods his head.

Then i hear clapping, its indra "impressive" she says offering me her hand "and you have never fought?" She asks

I shake my head "i watched karate kid and cobra kai" she looks confused "those are weird names for people" she says, i go to correct her but arms are thrown around me "y/n that was so cool?!?" Octavia yells before kissing me on the cheek.

Murphy scoffs loudly making us turn to him and he walks up to us "you missed dumbass" he sneers at octavia before kissing me on my lips "that was so fucking hot, i wouldve beaten him up myself but you had that shit handled" he then turns to octavia and kisses her forehead before walking away.

Octavia yells after him "you missed dumbass" before kissing him, its then i notice my foot hurts, i look down and notice a knive in it "hey thats nice and all but im gonNA DIE" i yell the last part out.

They separate and rush over to me, they follow my gaze and notice the knive "princess that wont kill you" murphy says "idiot" he mutters softly before lifting me up and bringing me to abby.

Octavia is quick to follow "so you promise she wont die right?" She asks murphy, he rolls his eyes "god did i really fall for two dumbasses?" He asks quietly, i scoff "so mean, no more kisses ever" i say which makes his head turn super fast to face me "fuck did you say?" He sneers "you cant take away my kisses i just got them" he says before kissing my jaw.

"no no i think y/n is onto something, also can you stop for a second" octavia says when we reach the ark, murphy stops and looks at her, eyebrow raised.

She smirks and sticks her tongue out, then pulls it back in and kisses me on the lips "oh no wait you cant do that to him, your lips are amazing y/n"

Abby clears her throat "if ur uh.. Done kissing my daughter i would like to ask whats going on?"

Murphy glares at her "shes injured. Clearly. And since clarke isnt here you need to help her, you cant refuse cause tavia and me will murder you if you keep y/n in pain" murphy spits out to my mother who always preffered clarke over me.

"I would never do that to her" abby says before leading us to a hospital bed, she starts taking care of the knive and the wound.

When shes done i turn to murphy and octavia "did good right?" I ask and their eyes soften, they nod their heads yeah "so where are my KISSES" i yell out the last part for dramatic effect.

They look at eachother and roll their eyes, then walk up to me and prep my face with kisses, then octavia speaks up "i want you both to be mine" she says, murphy then also speaks up "i want you both to be mine too" then they look at me.

I slowly get up a say "i need to think about it"

They both scoff "yeah right, just admit it you want to be ours so bad, we know how you look at us" octavia says and murphy nods his head.

"Your right i wanna be yours" i say while softly diving into their arms "but im the dom" i say softly, that makes them both scoff and look at me "dont challange us butterfly" octavia says to that murphy adds "you are lucky you are cute princess"

Luckily for everyone involved abby left right after fixing my foot.

That night y/n octavia and murphy share a room in arkadia, bellamy doesnt like the relationship.

But lincoln? Well he wants to join

Part 2??

Buy me a coffee?

[staygolddallas1]

Stars

Thank you all again for all the love and support!

Dally's POV

"Hey Johnnycakes, you cold or somethin'?" I asked looking over at the kid obviously shivering in his old worn out jean jacket.

Jesus when was the last time his good for nothing parents gave this kid a proper jacket.

Johnny shook his head, "Nah, just a little windy is all."

I huffed and started to take off my leather jacket, "Here kid."

"Dal-" he started to protest, but I gave him my "just shut up im not changing my mind" look and he just weakly smiled and let me drape it around his shoulders.

"Thanks Dal," He whispered looking up at me with those big brown eyes of his.

Shit.

I quickly tured my head away so he wouldnt see the small blush starting to form on my cheeks, "no problem kid."

We contined walking to the lot in silence. Not unconfertable silence just the opposite. Johnny and I didnt need words to talk.

Jesus that sounded sappy as shit.

"Stars look real pretty tonight," Johnny said looking up at them, "Ponyboy was talkin bout how they make up different shapes and stuff up there like.."

I felt a small smirk cross my lips as I watched him looking up at the stars and pointing out all the different constelations and planets. If this was anybody else I wouldve told them off or hell I probobly wouldve beaten them for just mentioning the big dipper, but not Johnny. I couldve listened to Johnny talk about the stars all night.

"Dally?"

I blinked and pulled myself from my thoughts, "Oh ugh yeah Johnny whats up?"

Johnny just smiled, "Thanks for walking me to the lot and for letting me borrow your jacket, you should probobly be getting to bucks now though its pretty late and-."

"Johnny there is no way in hell im letting you stay out here all night , youre coming with me."

Johnny looked down guiltily, "Dally you aint gotta do that, youve already been so nice to me tonight and all-"

I felt rage fill my chest. I hated his fucking dad. Hated him for how he made Johnny feel unworthy of kindness and  unworthy of anyone actually giving a shit about him.

"Listen Johnny it aint up for discussion, youre comming to bucks with me." I said sternly so he knew not to argue.

Then Johnny did something that caught me off gaurd he hugged me.

"Thank you Dallas, for everything." He said into my chest.

I couldnt remember the last time I hugged someone, but I wrapped my arms around his small frame and couldnt deny how perfect he felt in my arms.

"Dont sweat it kid."

It was at that moment I relized that Johnny Cade had me wrapped around his finger and I was compleatly okay with it.

[rigginsstreet]

God pls tell me abt either hiram beating the shit out of fred or fp hurting him by accident and being flung into depression both are sexy to me

if i am to believe fred had kj apa’s build in high school then he probably held his own in fights lmfao but adult fred? hiram wouldve knocked him the fuck out in one punch. if they had actually gotten into a fight at the courthouse and fred ended up all bloody and beaten... whew. it wouldve been a bad look for hiram like honestly i have to believe its canon he didnt go after fred just because itd absolutely destroy whatevers left of his image like.... people can look past the jail time and the crookery and the ego and all that but.... you cant beat up fred, man. you dont come back from that in the court of public opinion

as for fp... i HAVE to believe there was at LEAST one instance of fp being in full rage over whatever and fred was either trying to pull him from a fight or he was trying to calm fp down and fp just wanted to be left alone.... either way fred ended up getting socked in the nose and there was blood everywhere and fp was like “oh god im a monster” (you know... a drama queen) and wouldnt talk to fred for a week because he felt so guilty about it

[fire-in-her-veinz]

Mewling quim? loki x reader

You walk into the living room area/ slash kitchen bar , only to listen to Tony and Loki , throw insults. Again. You’re used to this by now.

Of course, they can’t be adults about the well failed New York attack and discuss their feelings and you know work it out. Which of course was perpetrated by the latter moron, who still holds the belief that he’s far above the weak , pathetic ape midgardians in every way especially in wits and intelligence and well until the failed attack warfare . Finally Stark seemed to have moved on from insulting every piece of clothing and armor Loki seems to own, including his favorite subject to mock , the ridiculous gilded curled horned helmet Loki seemed particularly attached to.

“ says the dude who was beaten like the little bitch he is by an Earthling, after bragging about how he was the real power the Earth desperately needed needed to kneel to”. Tony remarks sipping his scotch , yes he not only collects it , he occasionally has it made special for him.

“Your lives are nothing more than a heartbeat to us, a blink and you’re dust. My rule wouldve lasted an eternity. Far longer than your Shield , politicians and leaders. And it was an off day for me”, the smaller puny god , Banner affectionally but not really, calls the green eyed Trickster replies causally but with a tone of smug assurance.

“You’re older than a mummy , and you couldn’t come up with a better plan to attack /conquer the Earth than to persuade a pathetically defended alien army, to do it for you while you watched from the sidelines. Thor would’ve gotten the job done” .

“Yes also because you really striked fear with you MEWLING QUIM , to a trained assasin”. You add in almost amused at the cat fight about to break out.

But alas

You decide you’ve had enough of this idiocy.

“Looks like i didn’t miss much the Bickersons are at it again. What possibly could Trixie have done now besides of course exist in your presence”. , you deadpan annoyed at having to walk in on an argument, Dr. Phil himself couldn’t even resolve.

“You know what I don’t wanna know. Fucks sake go into group therapy, you know talk these feelings out etc. And come to the inevitable conclusion you two morons have more in common than you think”.

“She’s right, you two are worse than old married couple”, Banner says walks by, heading back to the lab as usual.

“Thanks Greenie!” you yell back.

“As if I’d ever stoop so low as to marry a Knob Head like Stark”, Loki snarks in reply.

“You know what they say there’s a thin line between love and hate, your highness”. you mock bow. And. grab some food and leave to avoid the eventual fistfight or throwing of someone thru the facing window thats been replaced so often Pepper or Friday just wordlessly puts the order in for a new one. Amazingly enough bulletproof glass isn’t strong enough to withstand, idiotic pissy Asgardians.

Loki gives you a death glare from over the couch. Silent for once.

“What? Nothing to say?Has that silver tongue of yours finally rusted over- “ “oh shit” you manage to get out before screeching when Loki chases after you around the room.

“Tony?!?! A LITTLE HELP?”

“You asked for it Y/N!”

“DON’T YOU DARE TURN BLUE AND GRAB ME -“ you let out a yelp as he catches you of course cold hands and all on your bare skin, provoking another screech.

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you to his chest , silkily whispering in your ear , “you know the knob head does have a point, you did ask for it”.

“Says the dude who thought ,mewling quim was a badass comeback”.

This is my first imagine ever. If you read pls leave a like , comment anything. Binge watched behind the scenes avengers/thor and got inspired by their antics haha

Also knob head in British jargon means dickhead . Just love the idea of Loki using British insults . I mean who doesn’t love mewling quim.

[apriki]

WARS OF THE STARS

So ya homegirl finally saw the last jedi and oh, there are THOUGHTS to be HAD below the cut for spoiler purposes but guys. GUYS.

I LOVED IT

I LOVED IT 

IT WAS WEIRD AND AMBITIOUS AND OVERTHREW THE CONVENTIONS OF THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE IN A WAY FORCE AWAKENS SPECIFICALLY DIDN’T AND I LOOOVVVED IT

when luke threw the lightsaber over his shoulder at the very start i was like OHHHHH YES BITCH...... ITS FUCKIN ON

‘this isn’t going to go how you think’ INDEED

my heart siezed when i saw leia ugh.... and this film treated her with the gravitas she deserved and i loved that 

POE IS A COCKY FLYBOY BUT OKAY THE HUX SCENE WAS LEGITIMATELY FUNNY and domhnall gleeson is having THE MOST FUN 

ROSE’S SISTERRR and i feel like this film took pains to show a more diverse range of people in the resistance and also in the background on the star destroyers? and i really loved that

snoke’s red room of pain lmaoooooooooo. and his mara jade bodyguards

snoke forcing kylo to take his helmet off because he knows kylo needs it to disconnect shut the fuck up

kylo tantrum™ and him wrecking the mask because snoke shattered its meaning to him but also YOU DON’T GET TO WEAR THE MASK IN THIS MOVIE, KYLO. A BITCH IS GONNA BE OUT HERE VULNERABLE AS FUCK

the timeline of this movie was... odd? i feel like we were meant to think rey was with luke for weeks but the rebellion plot was suuuuuper super fast. i employed some mental time dilation to make sense of it lmao

KYLO NOT BEING ABLE TO TAKE THE SHOT AND KILL LEIA

EMO SON LOVES HIS MOM 2K17

holy SHIT i really thought they were going to kill leia off 20 MINUTES IN for a hot minute there

but then she FORCED HER WAY BACK INTO THE SHIP? SUCK ON THAT DUDEBROS WHO SAID SHE WASN’T STRONG WITH THE FORCE LIKE DIE

SPACE LAURA DERN

We Need To Talk About Rey And Kylo’s Sense8 Plot

THAT FIRST SCENE WHERE SHE DIDN’T HESITATE, BITCH

and he FELT IT. HE FELT THAT BLASTER

THEIR FACES when they force felt each other what the guuud FUCK

kylo: you will lead me to skywalker

rey: i think the fuck not

‘i don’t see where you are... only you’

BI.......TCH

THE REST OF THE WORLD FADED AWAY AND THEY WERE STUCK WITH ONE ANOTHER

luke’s sad hermit routine lmfao

luke: the jedi weren’t shit really

me: absolutely fair and true

when rey was like ‘please take this lightsaber and all the responsibility that comes with it’ and luke was like ‘this bitch empty YEET’

porgs are whatever. i wouldve eaten that one on the stick lmao chewbacca is a softie

am i the only one who like doesn’t remember the millenium falcon’s dice in the mirror lmao

sidenote like, adam driver’s voice. right? right?

KYLO CALLING HIMSELF A MONSTER WAS WHAT MADE REY START TO BELIEVE HE WASN’T? WHAT KIND OF BYRONIC NONSENSE......

‘i’d really rather not do this right now’ / ‘yeah me either’

I CACKLED. 

THESE TWO SHIT KIDS WITH A SENSE8 CONNECTION THEY DON’T WANT DROPPING IN ON EACH OTHER’S NARRATIVES

I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS MOVIE IS REAL.

i heard that kylo ren had a sixpack. that kylo ren is shredded

DON’T YOU HAVE LIKE, A COWL OR SOMETHING?????????????????????

MAZ KANATA IS LIVING HER OWN ACTION FILM SHE DOESN’T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR BULLSHIT

loved the casino world that was so obviously based on monaco and dipping into the muddy waters of arms dealing and showing how deep the fight between tyranny and freedom runs in the galaxy. it can get quite baroque with the skywalkers and their drama and i felt like it was a smart smart move to have finn team up with rose to see how exploitation and cruelty don’t always have to be in the form of sith lords or first orders

this movie is so busy dismantling the ideas of heroes and villains. it’s just people making choices and that’s the point and it’s TRRRUUUUUUE

benicio del toro is the new era boba fett and i love HE

poe getting SLAPPED and BLASTERED like multiple times lmaoooooooo like i like him well enough but bitch listen to your betters!

i kind of loved that finn and rose went off on this grand plan to save the resistance and it.... didn’t work. like everything they kept trying just DID NOT WORK but there was still hope at the end? friends it was beautiful

YOU’RE NOT ALONE

KYLO SLIDING OUT INTO THE CORRIDOR IS UHHHHHH THE STRAIGHT UP BEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN

HE’S A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD LINKIN PARK FANATIC AND I LOVE

rey in the rain

the first time she’s ever felt it?

and then the world goes QUIET AGAIN

WHAT KIND OF WOLFGANG AND KALA BULL SHIT

and okay the end of this scene where kylo pulls his hand away

AND WIPES OFF

THE RAIN

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

CANNOT

I CANNOT.

WHAT IS THIS AGE OF INNOCENCE FUCKING BUFFONERY SCREAAAMM

‘did he tell you what happened?’

and like, kylo could just say it himself

but he knows rey wouldn’t believe him 

and luke fucking LIED

‘THAT SKYWALKER BLOOD’

me two years ago: what’s an adam driver

me now: (laughing nervously) what the f

‘why does the force keep connecting us?’ BITCH ME TOO LMFAO 

the way the world STOPS ALL AROUND THEM

oh my god the flashbacks

like i feel like we got more than enough of this alluded to in force awakens but some people need it in black and white i guess and HERE THE FUCK IT IS

‘and the last thing i saw were the eyes of a frightened boy whose master had failed him’

and okay WOW @ ME EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO HAS CONTINUALLY SAID HAN, LEIA AND LUKE DIDN’T FAIL KYLOHE LITERALLY TRIED TO MURDER HIM

look.

i am the most stoic bitch in a movie theatre. like shit does not phase me but i fucking teared UP my face just CRUMPLED LIKE UGHHHHH

AND ADAM’S DRIVER’S STUPID FUCKING FACE AND HIS DUMB EYES

HIS PARENTS SENT HIM AWAY BECAUSE THEY WERE AFRAID OF HIM AND HIS UNCLE TRIED TO FUCKING MURDER HIM

‘YOU WERE WRONG TO THINK HIS HEART HAD DECIDED!’

and THIS is what’s at the heart of the last jedi - dismantling the myth of the hero. there are no heroes, only people, and luke is the embodiment of thatto rey he’s a myth but to kylo he was a man and that’s how he stumbled but he stumbled because he believed his OWN myth i’m just..... dying slowly

THEIR HANDS TOUCHING

THEIR FINGERS

FUCK OFF

THE ELECTRICITY

I FEEL THE CONFLICT IN HIM

REY CRYING AND KYLO TEARING UP

GOODBYE BITCHES I’M FUCKIN OUTTA HEEEYYYYA

rey: i saw you at my side

kylo: well i saw YOU at MY side

me: fellas,

REY BLASTING OFF RIGHT INTO THE HEART OF THE ENEMY CAUSE SHE BELIEVES SHE CAN SAVE BEN’S SOUL

REY GOING INTO THE DARKNESS AND NOT BEING AFRAID

AND TRYING TO SEE HER PARENTS BUT ONLY SEEING HERSELF

snoke claiming that he mainpulated rey and kylo looks up in FURY because he realises he was manipulating him too

LIKE HE ALWAYS KNEW

BUT HERE IT IS IN BLACK AND WHITE

his fingers twitching 

the saber moving

me in my seat: boy he bout to DO IT

AND KILLS

HIS

TRUE

ENEMY

i SCREAMED

well i didn’t scream because i was in a theatre but i screamed on the inside. i would watch kylo or ANY character kill every person who ever manipulated abused used them and HOW oh my GOD 

HE COULDN’T KILL REY AND HE KILLED SNOKE INSTEAD.

HE COULDN’T KILL LEIA AND HE COULDN’T KILL REY

JUST A BOY IN A MASK

THE EYES OF A FRIGHTENED BOY

like he just wants someone to to TRUST and they all keep FAILING for all his talk to rey of her constantly looking for parental figures like all he fucking wants is to belong to something??

it’s whatever.

like i can but i also can’t believe we actually got this character so shaped and formed by abuse and manipulation KILLING HIS ABUSER. like KNEELING IN FRONT OF SNOKE and being beaten down and down and FINDING THE STRENGTH TO KILL HIM ANYWAY

the conflict of this series is happening in the galaxy but it’s also happening in ben solo’s heart and that’s just about enough for me to mcFREAKING lose it

THE WAY REY CONSISTENTLY CALLS HIM BEN.’

BEN. BENJY. BENJO BOY

REY AND KYLO FIGHTING

BACK TO BACK

BACK! TO BACK!

REY WITH THE CROSSGUARD SABER KYLO WITH ANAKIN’S SABER

KILLING THOSE RED DUDES MAYBE THE KNIGHTS OF REN? THE SLOW MO

FIGHTING TOGETHER................. 

POETRY

I DIED

I FUCKING STRAIGHT UP ASCENDED

REY CALLING HIM BEN AND HIM FLINCHING

EVERY

SINGLE

TIME

‘you’re nothing to the story - but not to me’

LOOK,

LISTEN,

I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS MOVIE IS REEEEAAALLLL

when kylo asked rey to join him i swear to god i heard the opening synth of carly rae jepsen’s ‘run away with me’

FORCE FIGHTING FOR THE SABER

DARKNESS AND LIGHT TO MEET IT

BUT ALSO DARKNESS IN HER AND LIGHT IN HIM

THE BALANCE

THE BALANCE!!

THEY’RE EQUALS THEY’RE SO EQUAL THEY FUCKING

TORE

THE SABER

APART

i seriously thought this was going to be the film’s climax but there was like 40 more minutes after this ksadjfkdsfj

LAURA DERN AND LEIA wow that was some BUSINESS 

and leia explaining to poe about doing the right thing vs. looking like a hero MY GOD this film is on another level. how the fuck did it both take star wars to town over like its most fundamental conventions but still feel true to the series and respectful and genuine? I AM... AGOG

LAURA FUCKING DERN LIGHTSPEEDING INTO A SPEED DESTROYER HOLLLLYY SHIT

and the no sound CRACKING APART of the cruiser the LIGHT 

this movie was shot so beautifully thanks disneymarvelfox conglomerate

honestly i’m still astounded that a film so rooted in nostalgia, nearly dependent on it in a way, firmly and deeply embedded a ‘let the past die’ moral through its narrative. LIKE, WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF BLOCKBUSTER???????? but i loved it, i loved that luke and kylo were both so determined to bury the past and rey was equally determined to dig it up. because how can you have balance without it? 

the whole hoth version 2 snow planet was beautiful and the BURGUNDIES the contrast i love an aesthetic!

(tastes red substance hesitantly) ‘Salt.’

i want a crystal wolf

LMFAO YODA JUST BEING A FUCKING TROLL WHAT THE HELL

they couldn’t phone ewan mcgregor for a yung hot jesus obi wan cameo? i’d be into it

LUKE’S FOOT NOT SHOWING A RED PRINT THAT’S WHEN I KNEW HE WASN’T THERE

kylo: .........i’ll destroy the girl

luke: no you wont

kylo: yeah no i wont u right u right

LUKE AND LEIA OH MY GODDDD the GRAVITAS of mark and carrie!!! it was so beautiful

when kylo gave an order and hux repeated it super loud and kylo GAVE HIM THE WILDEST SIDE EYE I FUCKING CHOOOOKEKEKKEKEKED

i’m glad somewhere along the way they realised hux is like the biggest joke character lmfao

bye phasma

finn’s storyline really god sidelined this movie huh? i loved rose a LOT and i loved them together but did we need the poe plot like really

all the scenes with the og trio have been so layered and beautiful you can 

though i thought luke died in the fire and it was his force ghost not him like force astral projecting lmao

LUKE WALKING OUT OF THE RED SMOKE FROM THE GUNFIRE DDDAMMMMNN

‘do you think you got him????????’ KDBFKSHDFKHDS

ooof that final confrontation scene though

damn right you should apologise luke lmfao

SEE YA, KID

kylo’s anger in the last third is just wooooof like he thinks he can destroy every person and every remnant that rejected him but he’s just running on his own anger until he realises luke isn’t really there and there’s nothing else for him to fight

OOOOF

THE BINARY SUNSET

that GOT me i was verklempt

rey and poe meeting was cute

i hope they’re not setting up a love triangle cause like that shit is tiiirrreeeedddd

i like finn and rey and also finn and rose like im happy to go down whatever road they take

THAT FINAL SCENE

SNOKE WAS WAY FUCKING DEAD BUT THEY WERE

STILL

CONNECTED

HIM BENEATH HER ABOVE

YES BITCH LOOK AT EACH OTHER

and shutting the door but like the FALCON

I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S GONNA BE TWO MORE YEARS

is the fucking novelization out yet?

or the script?

i want to swim in this movie god stay tuned as my thoughts #develop and #grow

[cheekbites-moved]

ok so i watched love simon for the first time last night & i was too tired to make a ‘final thoughts’ post then, so here it is now! lol

obviously this is gonna be long as hell so im putting it under a read more for ur convenience lmfao

im actually gonna start with what i didnt like bc it was just one thing.

obviously, if uve seen the movie (as many ppl hated this too), or read my liveblogging posts, u know what it is lol 

ill be honest, as a gay person, im incredibly biased towards simon. ill admit that. that being said, how his friends treated him after he got outed was fucking disgusting.

here’s the thing: the actions simon did that his friends got upset over were motivated by the threat of him being outed. now, if this movie was just some fluffy, fantastical movie, the threat would just be ppl knowing he’s gay and that’s it. no repercussions, just ppl gaining the knowledge that he’s not straight. not that big a deal.

however, since this movie tries its best to be accurate and realistic to things, it’s not that simple in the movie, and it’s not the simple in real life.

the risk of being outed is not just ‘ppl knowing ur gay’ and that’s it.

the risk of being outed involves the risk of getting bullied (which does happen in the movie, twice. once to ethan on screen, once to simon after he comes out.), getting abandoned by ur friends (which also does happen in the movie), getting expelled from school or fired from ur job if either of them find out & are lgbtphobic, getting kicked out of ur house if ur parents/whoever u live w find out & theyre lgbtphobic, and, at worst, it can come with the risk of getting beaten or even killed.

and no, this isnt me blowing this up to be more serious than it should be. bc unfortunately, in the world we live in, these things can happen as a result of someone being lgbt, whether they came out themselves or were outed by someone else. 

the worst thing simon did was hurt his friends’ feelings a bit. 

he didnt notice leah’s feelings for him (which. why would he? he’s not interested in her, or any girl for that matter, so obviously he’s not looking for the signs of interest. why would he notice that, and why was it his responsibility to know anyway??). he tried to set nick up with her because he genuinely thought she had feelings for nick, and that’s the main reason why he didn’t realize that she liked him.

yes, part of the motive was trying to get nick out the way so he could set abby up with martin, but ffs. let me reiterate that his life, and potential future, were on the line. having the possibility of all the aforementioned things potentially happening to him should make his actions at least understandable.

like falling for someone that doesnt like u back bc theyre not attracted to ur gender (which like.. hello. gay ppl fucking experience that shit all the time too & we have to learn to deal w it.), or being put in a game of matchmaker bc ur friend was trying to save their own fucking life is rly not that big a deal compared to said friend’s situation of trying to save their own fucking life. 

one situation hurts, but can eventually be healed from (which clearly they do in the movie since abby and nick got together anyway in spite of simon’s actions, and leah’s fine). the other situation has the chance of resulting in a fucking future/life being ruined or taken. i think that one is much more fucking important.

all in all, i just wish they wouldve fucking apologized. bc they screamed at him after he got outed. 

abby saw how fucking terrified he was when he came out to her, but she’s not gonna have a single ounce of sympathy when he was outed to the entire school against his will?? like what the fuck! 

also wish they wouldve stood up for him when he got bullied. they just sat there with guilty expressions, but none of them did anything. it was really rough to watch.

as much as all this seriously pissed me off, though, especially as a person who has been outed against my will so all of simon’s heartache as a result rly resonated with me.. 

i appreciate that they put that shit in. 

bc u know what unfortunately that is how cishet ppl react sometimes. guilting u for being lgbt, guilting u for not coming out to them despite knowing how scary it can be, etc etc etc. 

and getting apologizes from cishet ppl for that kinda shit is rare. so, as much as i was annoyed that they didnt apologize, that is unfortunately realistic. as much as i wish they wouldve stood up for him, that was also unfortunately realistic. so im still glad it’s in there even if it did piss me off. 

simon’s speech to martin was nice at least, and i hope that it taught some cishet ppl that have outed ppl, or threatened to out ppl, or wanted to out ppl, why u just dont fucking do that shit.

woo now that that’s outta my system lmfao onto all the good stuff! in bullet list form bc theres a l o t lmfao

the soundtrack ESP for the emotional moments wOw

‘i wanna dance with somebody’ gay musical addition

simon’s subtle annoyed looks whenever straight nonsense™  happens

simon’s terrible attempts at being straight

simon’s extremely subtle, but still noticeable if ur lgbt, panic whenever the potential chance of him being outed/discovered arises 

the dog

simon’s parents’ speeches to him after he comes out to them

seriously as gay, nb person w lgbtphobic parents that shit meant a lot to hear. 

the fact that this is not only a mainstream lgbt rom-com, but also a mainstream movie abt a gay kid learning to love himself and be confident with himself and his sexuality

simon’s journey to being able to proudly proclaim that he’s gay.

the speech he has near the end is so fucking powerful bc we see him struggle throughout the movie to say it. 

first he cant say it at all, then he can only say it quietly, but by the end of the movie, he’s proclaiming to the entire school, loud and proud, that yes. he is gay. and he’s not going to feel wrong for that anymore. 

i feel like that entire journey is one that can really resonate with a lot of ppl, including myself. so im so fucking happy that this movie included that progression, and ended it with him having such an exuberant amount of confidence. it was honestly really beautiful, and im glad i got to witness it.

simon practicing pickup lines in the mirror

“hey barack its me jacques”

abby trying to teach simon how to flirt

simon googling “how to dress like a gay guy”

simon not having martin’s bullshit and telling him off for how fucked up blackmailing him was from the start, but especially his speech about how important/personal coming out is to ppl and how shitty it was that he took that away from him

MRS ALBRIGHT IN GENERAL BUT ESPECIALLY HER ICONICALLY STICKING UP FOR SIMON IN THE CAFETERIA I STAN HER SO HARD!!

ethan in general, but especially his speech to simon in the office, and super especially the line “one gay’s a snnooze, two’s a hilarious hate crime”

like i seriously appreciate how real this movie is. and it doesnt have lines like this, or plots like the blackmailing/outing just for drama. 

it’s to show that this is how being lgbt can be sometimes, this shit rly happens. and i just rly appreciated seeing all that in a way that didnt even try to pull any punches. it was so clear they seriously cared abt making this an accurate movie, and that meant a lot

GETTING TO SEE TWO BOYS KISSING ON SCREEN MULTIPLE TIMES, AND NOT JUST THAT, BUT GETTING TO SEE THEM GET A HAPPY ENDING!!!!! 

i seriously cried for like 20 minutes starting from when bram showed up at the ferris wheel to well after the credits had ended. 

i cannot even begin to express how fucking incredible it was to get to see two boys kissing, getting cheered on, and getting to be happy.

especially in the scene where simon picks up everyone, and leah moves so bram can get in the front seat and he kisses simon when he gets in. IT WAS SO SWEET.. AND BEAUTIFUL I LOVED/APPRECIATED IT SO MUCH IT MEANT SOOOO FUCKING MUCH TO ME GOSH

my thoughts of the movie can be boiled down to this: im so fucking happy this movie exists. 

im so fucking happy that a movie abt a gay kid learning to be confident in his sexuality, falling in love and getting to have a happy ending with his boyfriend exists.

ive never cried more at a movie than i did at this movie, and ive especially never cried harder out of sheer happiness for a movie. 

knowing that this movie was in theaters, and that gay kids/teens have a movie that lets them know early on that not only is gonna be ok, but they do have a chance at a happy ending, and they deserve it, was so goddamn amazing.

this movie is so, so important. and im so happy that it, and the book its based off of, exist. 

and it’s a prime example of why representation matters so much. it was so fucking amazing to see myself, as a gay person, represented so well, so thoughtfully, so respectfully. 

i just... i love this movie so much. and im so glad it exists. and im so happy i finally got to see it.

i hope it inspires more movies/stories like it to be made. 

i hope that it results in lgbt stories being happy, uplifting stories. 

i hope that it results in lgbt characters getting to be the main characters. 

i hope it results in coming out stories being about the lgbt characters, and not how them coming out affects the cishet characters around them. 

and i hope it results in less tragic endings for lgbt characters, and more happy endings for lgbt characters.

for a long time, a future where we get the stories just mentioned has seemed bleak. but this movie changed that. and im excited for the road i hope it’s started us on.

[emaroth]

GOD i just had the most fucking INFURIATING zurvanEX clear group. now i dont need the clear, but ive been having very little luck with farm parties today and this party looks promising so i join it.

im a WAR and there’s a DRK so i assume he’s gonna MT it but they ask me to instead so im like yeah sure ok ive MTed before it’s nbd i think. waymarks are set in a strange way to accommodate the healers and i think it’s strange but im like ok ill just adjust. anyways, everything is going fine and we get to demon’s claw. i do it the way i normally do it and keep zurvan centered before being knocked back towards the outside of the rink. notices no one has stacked with me so i die. we wipe. start again. same thing happens.

so at this point i think theyre thinking im a PLD/DRK and can HG/LD through it so i tell them “hey guys im a WAR so you guys need to stack so i dont die to demon’s claw.” get a huge paragraph on how to do the mechanic, and im like “i know how to do the mech no one is stacking though which is causing me to die” 

monk PL berates me for trying to get the party to move and ruining everyone’s DPS because im lazy and don’t want to do the mechanic correctly and every tank does it this specific way (though i havent seen anyone do demon’s claw like that in a really long time. at least not in 2 tank parties where DPS isnt as focused on). so now im pretty annoyed but people are turning on me so i dont say anything. i just start the countdown, pull, and do it the way they wanted. 

now we keep wiping on the first tethers because people aren’t getting organized. now people are like “just go to the closest one and do what feels right and we’ll adjust around you.” and i go “well it may be better for the one with opposite tethers to come up N so that we’re a little more organized because we have very little time to adjust” and the monk PL condescendingly goes “same shit just make sure everyone spreads out after southern cross.” so now i feel like my suggestions are being tossed to the side but w/e i pull again. people do tethers the way i had suggested and SURPRISE WE GET THROUGH THEM.

so now we get to the 2nd soar then demon claw. accidentally went back to habit and got knocked in to out rather than pulling him out and getting knocked in. again, no one stacks center and i die. the party wipes. monk PL goes “if you handled demons claw I think we could have beaten it.” and it’s like.... demon’s claw could have been handled if yall stacked correctly the way the mechanic is SUPPOSED to go?? but i word it a little nicer and go “lol did it by habit by accident. it wouldve been better to adjust rather than forcing the wipe” and the monk PL goes VERBATIM “Would’ve been best to handle the mechanic. ;)” as though i fucked up an entire PARTY STACK MECHANISM BECAUSE THE PARTY DID NOT STACK SO THEY COULD GET IN MORE DPS FOR A SECOND...

healer goes we thought u hallowed ground it even though ive explained before that WAR holm is too short to normally do it through demon’s claw, and i tell them again that holm’s cast is too short. people begin to tease my character because i play lalafell and go “just like larissa lol”. still not sure if it was a joke meant to get at me or lighten the mood but i was already SEETHING at that point. monk PL goes “i dont think that’s true im pretty sure I’ve seen a WAR do it before” and people are asking me how long the cast is and shit. then the thing that set me off was the monk PL going “in any case, please handle your mechanic and do it the right way, k?” like get the fuck outta here with that condescending bullshit because i didn’t position zurvan in a way for you to optimize your DPS so y’all wipe instead. so i just leave. like fuck that. im not gonna let y’all treat me like shit after you ask me to tank and then proceed to not do the mechanic correctly. 

ive never had so much trouble with that mechanic since today because of people refusing to stack and expecting me to HG/LD even though im a WAR. literally had a farm party disband because no one stacked for demon’s claw and i died b/c i couldnt holm through it then the party leader reformed the party and barred WARs from joining LOL.. like are you for fucking real?? it’s getting to the point where i dont even think farming zurvanEX is even viable as a war because people just wanna cheese mechanics.

[isaacathom]

ok this is actually a fun bit of writing here, even if the preceding shit was kinda garbage

tl;dr this bitch has to rant about this stupid book because i naively want to learn something about my family’s history and this is the only fucken way to do it

‘When he discovered he had to work to help provide for this instant family of a large flock of children, ‘Mick’ showed his true self and devotion to the family.

Within a year of the marriage, he left the fold, leaving his wife to fend for herself in the daunting task of raising her children.’

like.aside from just being kinda awkwardly worded (he bangs On and On about how his mum was the 11th of 11 children like fuck i get it its a big family, holy shit) i think thats just. a good concept there. the space really sells the punch. wouldve been better if we hadnt been told beforehand that Mick was a cunt, yknow. but thats nice

also lets keep going. ‘6 step brothers and 4 step sisters’ theyre actually her Half Siblings. they all share the same mother. theyre related. she’d be step if she was adopted, which she was not, because if she were, surely we wouldve been told about those circumstances.

‘[his mother] easily met that high standard as she was a very pretty young lady’ please dont perv out over your fucking mother you pig of a man. also you would hope ‘jock’ (his name is fucking robert but ok, Jock) was interested in more than how pretty Nellie was when they got together, right......... like there had to be more to it. am i naive? perhaps

‘scottish clan gordon’ the what. but we arent gordons???? are you. are you hundred percent sure. are you positive about this. are you sure thats why your name is gordon. alright buddy

‘according to buzzy’s story’ please never refer to yourself in the third person

‘hotels rarely burn down’ ?? i dont buy that at all. my guess is this famous hotel (which.... you didnt name so ok)

ok so theres a picture in here of my dad standing at some random gate, and he says its the same gate as a picture of his dad..... where is THAT picture??? this picture means nothing without that historic context, and it feels hollow if the actual picture isnt there.

granddad you dont. you dont need to wikipedia article dump me information about glasgow??? i mean sure, cool, id rather just be reading the wikipedia article.

jesus christ. so hes talking about his dad, right. who he’d technically set up earlier by saying he came to melbourne at 19. before he launched into a whole thng about his mother and shit. and suddenly hes come back to his dad to explain that his dad (so gordons grandfather) used to beat him! and its like, wOAH, where the fuck did that come from??? shit dude. thats rough. but he just mentions it suddenly out of nowhere. oH JESUS actually. sorry. i misread (yknow, because its written like shit). he means.... his brother??? right, he means his Brother Robert, was beaten by his dad, also named Robert, who was the one who came to melbourne aged 19. ok. ok that makes slightly more structural sense but ooof. ouch. poor robert (the younger). in my uh, defence, this book is written awful and i've never met robert? (my.... understanding is that he probably died before i was born? like with mary, who i dont recall having met either)

ok uhhh ‘most of the gorbal’s tenemenets were eventually demolished by the wise founding fathers many decades later, in the 1980s’ the WHOM. this isnt fucking america, this is scotland, what in the actual fuck are you TALKING about????????????????????????????? ‘modern day replacement improvements and architecture designed to achieve, what?’ fucker they were trying to fix the mistake they made in crowding 90k people into the fucking gorbals. maybe they didnt succeed (they didnt) but they were trying, it was naivete rather than fucking malice, you bitter old fuck. like, you visited in the 1980s.... and published this book in 2007......... without thinking to check back......... like hey maybe theyve gotten better? (newsflash - they fucking have) sooo... fuck

‘could the [my family] be related? [to the mcdonalds]’ yes??? we literally are. theres no question of that. being a sept of clanranald, we are Literally related to the fucking macdonalds. you absolute buffoon. yea its distant, and maybe thats your point, but when combined with you launching into this giant diatribe about rhw Campbells for shit that happened long ago, it seems youre picking and choosing how close ‘related’ is. we are. literally. related to the macdonalds. also it wasnt thought up in glasgow, they were from fucking new hampshire. but sure. 

‘his sheila wife of his’ excuse me?

‘so the name was related to a buzzing bee i suppose’ ? i still dont get it. like, he then explains that apparently his twin sister had difficulty saying Brother, so she called him Buzzy. that makes sense to me. i can understand that. but the buzzing bee thing? not sure i follow, given the prior context he provided. i dont get it. this is written like garbage. theres no structure. we went from jumping forward in time to the birth of my uncle Dale (my dads older brother) and suddenly we’re talking about Mick’s running career and gordon’s childhood! what the fuck happened.

‘coupled with the bigoted attitudes that were rife during those periods’ says the man who got angry at a black (i THINK, mightve been a separate story)  frenchman who couldnt speak english in France because ‘we saved them’. fuck off. youre just like them, you old codger.

also hes decrying his grandfather mick for being ‘no true irishman’ even though micks dad was full irish? by that exact same metric i can call my grandfather no true scotsman, because his dad is full scottish and thats it!!! you fucking fool. no true irishman, holy shit, how little self awareness could this man have.

‘then excessive drinking liquor isnt for me’ but is Is for your wife, is it gordon??? drinking wine when shes on antibiotics??? fucking incredible. god theyre. theyre so stupid.

‘not proceeding as a scholar as i could have’ you literally admitted like 5 pages ago that your twin sister was Far smarter than you, but sure! ~scholar~. if you were meant to be a scholar surely you wouldve bounded back from missing days with a vengeance. youre talking complete tosh.

im confused why theyd be doing bombing drills in South Yarra.... in preparation from a japanese air raid.... like im sorry, if the people north are doing their jobs, theres no physical way they couldve gotten to south yarra....... but ok. thats not his fault i just think thats strange.

im 110 pages in and he hasnt actually gotten to the point where he meets eleanor??? aside from a few time jumps forward and a brief mention of ‘meeting her in a milk bar in south yarra’ so like. hoi vey? the fuck.

oh jesus thats. thats a heavy thing to just chuck in the middle of a sentence??? like ‘oh yea after Skete the next scout leader was a paedophile who abused me and the others’ wwwOooahhh there buddy back up. what???? holy shit. ouch. thats. thats rough.

‘absolutely belted this poofta bastard’ yknow what? fair. id also beat the fuck out of a pedo with my boot. thats Relatable. good going on that, i suppose.

ooh thats full third person, weird.

one thing that is definitely kinda interesting, and very telling about his relationship with his family, is that he only ever refers to Nellie as ‘mum’, but refers to Mick as, well, Mick! rather than ‘granddad’ or anything of the sort. like its just sorta interesting when you get this big family photo and Nellie is the only one not called by her first name.

‘returning to those earlier days’ NO! FUCKING MOVE FORWARD IN TIME YOU GIT!!!! holy shit i just want to read about new fucking shit.

......... so like, at some point while playing footy, an opposing player kicked him in the leg and caused a fractured tibia. so a few weeks later... one of gordons friends took a mark on that player and kneed him straight in the head, with that player never playing again. and he’s PROUD of that!!! he’s proud of his friend for ruining a guys footy career. like yea, the guy was a dick, he broke your leg and it was at least partially malicious, but like........... you fucked him up????? hardcore?????? a straight up ruination. but go off i guess.

its interesting that he doesnt go even remotely into eleanors history beyond the fact (so far) that her father Leo didnt say much but was a good dude. then again the books all about him soooo fuck it i suppose.

‘recognition of our scottish heritage’ eleanor isnt scottish tho. shes irish. shes an o'donoghue. what the fuck. like yea naming them dale and glen is a ‘clever’ nod back to scotland (i actually do think thats cute and clever, joking aside. its the exact sort of ‘clever’ shit i love pulling) but............. shes not scottish. unless we’re waiting for volume 2 all about eleanor.

hE USED TO LIVE OUT HERE??????? IN SPRINGVALE????? fuck me. no fucking wonder we live here, huh, jesus. that. certainly explains something, i suppose. like ‘if you were raised in holbrook and YOU were raised in thomastown, why do we live in knox?’

OHHHHH HERES THE FRENCH THING!!!! OHHHH HERES ONE OF THE FRENCH THINGS. OH BITCH behold

so granddads being a dick, as usual, and he’s on some tour in paris. and the tour guide launches into a long thing about the glory of france, like french history and the fighting record, etc. and granddad calls out and tells him to knock it off, because ‘our australians died by the thousands for your country’

i. eh... uhh............... is he. is he aware? of how many french people died???? for france?????? how many????? il tell you how many - apparently 1.44% of the total population of france. thats 600000 people. how many did we lose? around 35k. thats, uh, a smaller fucking number. than the amount of french people. who died. for fucking france. you fucking idiot.

it kills me. is he gonna include the french speaking one too???

oh hell that sure is a picture of my father. good heavens. holy shit my brother really does look like him. thats uncanny, man.

‘one son Scotty’ his name is Scott, actually. not scotty. but cool, i got a really small shout out, weirdly BEFORE my older cousins did???? oh dear is he gonna talk about my uncles divorce actually. oh god. thats. thats terrifying to consider. oh, cool, he didnt in that small section, hopefully it doesnt come up haha (i can only IMAGINE what sort of vile shit he’d say about cathy)

also, ooh, more nuggets on grandma’s family. her dad was a freemason! thats cool.

ooh! he was the president of holbrook shire council! thats kinda neat actually.

ooh! the glenndale motel actually still exists! thats cool as hell. not that granddad told me that i just googled it

OHHH ITS THE FUCKING FRENCH SPEAKING STORY OH MY GOD

Ok first off ‘i slammed my fist into the counter and said very calmly’ yea no fuck that, youre fucking lying. theres no way you slammed the counter and spoke calmly. you almost definitely abused this poor french metro worker who, being a French Man living in France, is not required to know english. you fucking babboonnnnnnnnnn

apparently he nearly fell off a mountain innnnnn geeermany? austria, austria. and as he mentions my dad pulling him back up, he words it as ‘stopping me from falling to my final destiny’ what fucking wording IS that. my god.

uh well ok thats. about it i suppose. there was a big hullabuloo about like, hotels and shit, and there was probably some racism about Islanders in there (like i find it hard to believe there wasnt but im not gonna go back and double check, because this book reads like absolute garbage). but eh. yea?

uuhhh so that was an Adventure, for sure