#would have a hell of a lot to say about it

[trans-androgyne]

Hey, the “you’ll look more attractive because you’re more comfortable in your body” thing they tell transmascs is nice and all, but please don’t be convinced that’s the extent of it. If you’re a transmasc worrying you’re going to lose your attractiveness by transitioning I’ve got good and bad news for you. The “bad” news is that you very well might—in the eyes of people who only like your womanhood/femininity. For example many cishet guys who might’ve showed you attention before may not be as into you anymore. But the good news is you can in fact be way hotter as a guy/masc, I know firsthand that there are people who go absolutely nuts over it (special shoutout to t4t het trans women ily <3).

Of course we’ve been told growing up that masculinity makes us less attractive, bc it’s gnc for people assigned female and therefore isn’t the conventional beauty standard. Girls in high school would compliment my lack of body hair all the time. But in reality there are people who drool over butch women, and there are people who drool over transmascs, because we are hot as fuck. The people I date now are desperate for me to get hairier and more masc, they love that shit. You don’t have to adhere to the kind of beauty you were taught is fit for a girl to be attractive to people, there is so much outside of that and your trans masculinity is going to look awesome on you, I guarantee it.

[aly4khq]

A DRAGON'S LAIR! ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ⋆*

— sum: You were exploring Tarus city as a self mission, trying to find the dragon who was told to have lived in the city for many years to come. You thought that you would encounter barely anything, but you were ever so wrong.

— characters: dragon!sylus

— warnings: pining, he tops ur clothes, double penetrartion (he had too dicks), improper use of his tail, manhandling, biting, fuckin from behind. (if i have missed any, please inform me!)

— wc: 1,746

You've never been one to lerk into unknown territory or to find refuge in a random city that you learnt about in a history book — it's never been in your nature at all. But once you saw the posters, you knew that it was a place of worship and surprise.

Tarus city, a city where it's been claimed to have a dragon that laid in the depths of a special cave. The cave was highly risky for any normal human being, I mean, the image that laid on the posters was frightening enough to keep away tourists. The unusually greyish-red that scattered around the cave's entrance, moving around like a line circling a branch, a black thick coating around it which looked like claws when compared to each other, the singular hand on the top leading to the cave like it was inviting you.

You loved mythical creatures so this was a field day for you, you needed to go.

There was also a garden which yearly grew beautiful flowers there, crimson in colour and rose in shape. They scattered everywhere, and they seemed to have been planted by a very skilled gardener — if there even was one back in the early years of life. Oh how you'd love to distress by rolling in there after a long day, what a dream.

But you weren't just there for the cool looking dragon, you were there for the sword. Like that playground sword that you had to remove from the ground, and whoever could move it was the 'chosen one', there was one that laid outside the cave, imbedded in the beautiful scenery of flowers and healthy grass with its delicate pattern leaving you with mysteries.

"Where did it come from?" "What does it symbolise?" "How did it get there out of all places?"

Who owned it?

Well, let's just say that you weren't too scared to find out. You needed answers and if you had to dig into a random mythical cave then you will. Despite the lack of information, you searched up any little tips to help you navigate inside of a cave.

You needed to be prepared, and properly prepared.

After a while of constant climbing and exploring the beautiful long yards of greenery, you stood face to face with the cave that was feared the most back in Linkon City, aka the Dragon's Lair. In the papers, it looked like absolute horror capturing in a frame but in person, it was gorgeous.

The cave was expanded and opened for anyone to come into, and you'd did just that. Entering the cave, you turned on the flashlight you brought, seeing insta treasures of many different kinds of art scattered around the walls of the cave. "Wow...this is cool..." you softly murmured to yourself, still engrossed in the scenery—

...what the hell was that?

A deep and raged growl sped through the walls of the cave like air, filling your eyes with an intense sound. Hissing, the growl's sound waves led you to an expanded room, where a big bed-like item was in the front, surrounding by more jewels of ancient treasures. You found yourself searching around, looking for what this place could've belonged to.

And after 5 minutes, you dug in, "What's the worst that could happen?"

Searching the amazing rich items on the floor, your bag got heavier and heavier with time. Each jewel that caught your eye went in. Some of them even had ancient symbols on them, now that's a lot of money.

But, a singular gem caught your eye. It was a necklace that had a black substance scattered all over it, laying on the bed that was in the middle of the room. "Oh?" your hand went out, curious, "This is peculiar."

The necklace was a beautiful golden chain, wrapping with ancient knots and twists so it was bonded together perfectly. On both sides of the pendants scattered around the necklace, there were small, very intricate patterns dented into the metal. It had a pocture of a dragon on the front, and it...was weirdly shaped. Like the top half was crossed out, but forget that, you just found a good millions of money in your hands.

"Well, that's been a nice journey here cave, thanks for the new finds and...yeah. I'll be going."

You turned for the entrance where you came from, and it was blocked off by a large bolder. "Huh..? Why...who?"

You turned around to find a way to get out when a tail wrapped around your waist, pulling you down to your knees in a rapid manner. You scrapped your knee on the harsh carpet. "Ah! Hah...ow.." You tired to arise from your forced position when you heard a deep voice.

"Were you never taught of etiquette? Or was it just you who missed out?"

He boomed over you, a...handsome man. He was silver hair, crimson eyes and weird black claws and a tail. His clothes bleeding in with his skin.

This isn't the dragon. I mean, it's a literally human being?

"Etiquette? Who are you?" You replied back harshly, not thinking before you spoke. Remembering quickly, it was too late, his tail went around your body before whipping the skin behind you thighs. You yelped, cursing the man-dragon above you.

"You!—" "Me what?"

He arose from his throne, walkijg menacingly to grab your waist before pulling you up to your feet. He turned you around, your back against his toned chest. His hand went over your chin and upper neck, pushing your head back to his shoulder with a smirk.

"Maybe I should teach you," he bite your collarbone before growling, "how to respect a dragon's cave."

"Gahh—Ugggg, you're so deep!—"

"Focus."

That same dragon had you bent over the same drawer you had stolen from, your clothes ripped from his sharp claws just where you soaked pussy was.Your back arched like never before and his hand still around your chin, his teeth biting and sucking on your collarbone with delight. His hips were slow but deep, reaching your cervix with long strokes, his dick sending you into a wave of pleasure.

"What's the answer?"

He'd made you write down the rules of entering his cave again, the pencil shaking vigorously in your trembling hands. The paper soaking up your falling tears as you begged and pleaded with the man above you. "Hahh— Sylus— please...! Please! I might just—"

His tail traveled down your clit, gently caressing it with the peek of the tail. "Write it down, or I'll do even worse." He threatened, and you obeyed, grabbing the pencil and harshly writing down, "I will be respectfu—"

"Ah!!" His hip gave you a sharp thrust, a warning to behave and write properly. His hand groping your wee cheeks to the point that you could feel his claws digging into your flesh. "You have one more chance." With every word, he thrusted harder until you shrieked, your body bending more forward to escape his powerful hips, you pussy squeezes into the life out of him.

Your hands went back, trying to push his pelvis away from you. "Hm?" He hummed, his eyebrow rising before you hear a chuckle, "Want me to slow down sweetie?" His voice was playful, yet you nodded quickly anyway.

"Too bad." 



He sped up, his hips snapping so fast with your to the point where it echoed in the room. Your hands banged on the drawer, lookijg for a way to soothe to intense pleasure that you were being given. You couldn't even speak, your face fucked out and your body slowly weakening.

"S-Sy...luss...I can't...! Please..." You begged, trying to find a better way to convince him to give you a break. His dick the was so deep that you thought that it was two dicks at once. It felt so huge, and more struggle.

The stretch was too much, you yelled, "Sylus! Why is it—" You gasped loudly, relent that he had two massive ducks in you at the moment, both of them lodged deep in your pussy. In that moment, you nearly passed out. "Ahh ah hah...hahh!!" You cried out, tensing, "Pleaseee..."

"You're fine, just one more." Sylus cheered on, his tail moving up to caress your back, travelling down the straight line. His tail met your ass, gently put slowly digging it into your other hole, "No! No no, please, i can't, please," Your whole body was shaking, your sweat coating your skin.

"Mhm, fine, for now." Sylus replied in a teasing tone before continuing to roll his hips into yours, and by that tight squeeze he knew that you were close. You stood a little, crying, "I can feel it!— I need to pee—Why does it feel like I need to pee?!—"

He reassured you, speaking in your ear, "It's normal, you're fine, just relax." You wasn't breathing at all. He grabbed your chin again before ordering you, "Cum."

Your orgasm hit you, your lungs not being able to take in oxygen due to the sheer force of your release. The intense feeling was still shocking you, your hands braking some of the wood of the drawer due to your grip. Your legs shaking like no ever before you felt his claws tap your chest, "Hey, Breathe."

You took a deep breath in before covering your mouth, instantly being met with fatigue. "I need a rest...I can't feel myself..." Sylus chuckled at your position, his hand goijg around your waist to carry you to his bed. "It's okay, you took both off my dicks, well done."

"I knew you'd come along," Sylus hummed, "so just relax my Queen, I'll take care of you.

this is not proofread! i was too eager to post so sorry hotties!

@ aly4khq, do not plagiarise, translate or copy my work.

[communistkenobi]

I was looking for a book recently on an online storefront and was recommended a book written by a physicist about the history of humanity. this was a popular press book that was not intended to be read by other academics, but it reminded me of this niche genre of books, with experts from the physical sciences writing about human behaviour or history or what have you. Could you imagine coming across the inverse? A popular press book that purported to explain physics written by a historian?

There is some deep imbalance in how public perceptions of “general intelligence” seem to work - those in STEM are generally recognised for their competence, expertise, and intellectual acumen, and this recognition can be generalised, that at some level a demonstration of your expertise of eg astrophysics is a demonstration of your abilities of investigation writ large, that you have figured out some central underlying element of science that allows for basically limitless intellectual extension to any field or subject. A physicist can write a book about human history and be taken seriously by the general public on the assumption that physics is more difficult to understand than history, so any lower domain of investigation is open to them. The reverse is often not extended to a lot of the social sciences, particularly the theoretically-heavy social sciences; theory is just making bullshit up at the end of the day, it has no real practical application because any questions about the philosophy of thought or knowledge - how did we come to know what we know and under what conditions do we know these things - is just the indulgent wankery of people who can’t find a real job.

And of course it would be silly to insist that because you have read Hegel, an infamously difficult thinker, you know how to interpret the lab print-outs of electrochemists - I don’t want this goofy concept of general intelligence to be applied everywhere, I want it to go away entirely, but its current uneven applications across scientific fields indicates a broader problem with public conceptions of expertise and knowledge.

This probably has something to do with anti-communism on some level - social science is not generally regarded as “real science” (in no small part because social science is often the field of bureaucrats, and while animosity towards bureaucrats is deeply sympathetic, I suspect the reasons for this animosity are not themselves scientifically grounded), that while there is a public understanding of “objective facts” that exist prior and external to human interpretation, the politics of knowledge are hegemonically oriented around liberalism, to such an extent that any critique of the assumptions of knowledge are viewed as a dogmatic denial of reality done for the purposes of political infiltration and brainwashing. And I don’t feel totally unqualified to say this, given that this is basically the de facto response from students encountering Marxism for the first time in university. “Marx is too dogmatic” may as well be inscribed above the doors to lecture halls. Hell, Jordan Peterson made a nice little public career for himself railing against “post-modern neo-Marxism,” a phrase so nonsensical that the fact he was not immediately and permanently laughed out of the public arena for saying it is an indictment of how politically illiterate we are as a society!

And the infuriating thing is that a lot of social science scholarship (not just from the US but especially from the US) is complete horseshit, just pure evil garbage motivated solely by a desire to justify the fact that we do really need to keep killing tens of thousands of people a year to keep this whole party going. Every sociologist who calls themselves a “methodological individualist” is contributing to the long-standing tradition of eugenics scholarship but is too craven and vain to admit to this. If you had to describe the sum-total of the social scientific scholarly output of the west in a word, it would be ‘mysticism.’ Because it is the case that anti-colonial, anti-imperial, and anti-capitalist investigations of the political-economic conditions of the world have produced social scientific knowledge on par with the discovery of the atom, but it is not treated as such. “It is right to rebel” is not just a moral claim about violence but a scientific summary of human history.

But I think it is precisely this reactionary state of affairs that makes people devalue the social sciences as an actual site of legitimate investigation, that understanding the historical trajectory of ideas or the political conditions of life are valuable pursuits for any just society. Because social science deals with the social world, the political conditions under which the social world is investigated and understood are themselves bound up in questions of political and economic power. But this equally extends to the physical sciences - I know at least in environmental sciences, there is an ever-growing reckoning with climate change as an imminent threat to all life on earth, and environmental scientists cannot avoid talking about the political conditions of our planet even if all they want to do is study a river. Genocide is measurable in soil samples taken in the American continent. The separation of the environmental from the social is itself a historically contingent arrangement of knowledge.

But this is infuriating to even complain about because I don’t want to sound like an entitled academic or ego-bruised professional. I have no desire to start a faculty war with the STEM fields. I feel secure in my own expertise. I do not want anyone to “recognise my greatness” I am just profoundly lonely in this whole affair. and it just so happens that we exist in terribly anti-intellectual conditions for the most cruel and ugly reasons possible, and so we (me, I) have to suffer seeing books on sale claiming to give a general account of human history written by a physicist

[aceshigh10987666]

[Image ID: Screenshot of reddit post: r/DiscoElysium 1 yr. ago beamoon2016 Never thought I'd read a story that so effectively captures why life in a broken system is worth living Discussion

I grew up in Iraq. When people hear this in the US, where I now live, they usually say: "Wow…that must have been hard."

I mean? I guess? I've been a couple hundred meters from ISIS bombings. The government is spectacularly dysfunctional. You never know when the electricity might be on. Most summer days are 50 C. The tap water is salty.

And I also love the wonky little generators people wire everywhere. I love the weird shark statue with Saddam torn off the top. I love the guys fishing in the river despite the fact that it's greenish black. I love how excited everyone gets about the government building one tiny new overpass. I also love the random overpass sitting in the desert connected to zero roads. I love hearing our friend giggle as my dad ribs him for driving a Toyota Hilux, a favorite of terrorists transporting weapons. I love the stray cats that carefully pick their way over the barbed wire on our walls. I love the people that run towards a bombing instead of away because they want to help the survivors. I love the guy who fixed my glasses with a wrong-sized screw because he lived through sanctions and doesn't need dumb things like correctly-sized screws.

But it's almost impossible to explain this to most Americans. They picture a normal Iraqi life and think it would be their worst nightmare. So I'm used to just not sharing that part of my life, or ever seeing it in media.

So this game totally caught me off guard. We're in a setting in between apocalypses, starring an alcoholic fuckup from a corrupt occupier-aligned police force, who at best might keep a couple people from dying in a gang war. It's pretty bleak. It's also incredibly fucking joyful.

Just the prose alone is so sincere. You can't write stuff this goofy, flowery, beautiful, dumb, and moving ironically. The writers clearly love words far out of proportion to how much they might be able to actually change fundamentally broken systems.

And all the characters, the worldbuilding details, the interruptions from Shivers and Esprit de Corps, hell, all the bits and pieces of your brain. There's so much attention and thus so much love everywhere in this game for humans and what humans do. Doesn't matter if they might all get shot, blown up, or wiped clean by pale in a couple years. Doesn't matter if they brought it all on themselves. Right here, in this moment, they are human, and so they matter.

I feel like this game gets why my life in Iraq was worth living. Even if a lot of my fellow Americans think the world sure would be nicer and simpler if Iraqis just didn't exist.

I thought I had signed up for a fun 20-30 hour diversion, not the feeling of being loved?!/.End ID]

an Iraqi gamer's beautiful review of Disco Elysium

[quarterlifekitty]

I love your weaknesses posts🥹✨do you have any thoughts about the guys and massages (full body, shoulders, hands, etc)? could be receiving or giving them

I personally feel like Kyle would be so into them in general, meanwhile Johnny would try to be handsy or silly with them

Machveil I hope you know that I would blow up a fucking building for you if only you would ask me to

Weaknesses part 7: massages

I think Gaz is super into anything relaxing, aromatic, therapeutic. Loves candles, baths with special scented soaps and salts, massages. Anything that inspires slow, tantric intimacy. And also I think he is the king of treating himself and self care. Generally he’s more into giving, but he likes to trade massages too. He always sets the scene for you, lighting the aforementioned candles, putting on music, dimming the lights. And he’s really good at giving them. Because of course he is.

Soap is the fucking naughty masseuse and we all know it ok. He basically gives massages the way they do in porn where it’s just an extended pretense to sex where he can feel you up. Like he does try to give you a real massage for all of 3 minutes (if I’m being generous) before it’s basically just spanking you and reaching between your thighs. And if you decide to return the favor? He’s not going to shut up about getting a happy ending. Not for the entire time.

Ghost isn’t all the comfortable giving massages because he can see the blood on his hands at the edges of his vision all the time, like a cataract born of sin and violence unbridled n stuff. But he loves receiving them! You know he’s tense as fuck back there man. Doesn’t know how to relax himself, needs someone to force him to relax. You sitting straddled on him while you rub his back does it for him.

Price likes both. Plays a little into the housewife kink. Likes you to rub his shoulders after a long day, kneading into him and just trying to help him unwind like a good, sweet, considerate girl. And in return, this man is rubbing your feet and I’m not gonna apologize for saying it. Especially if you’re pregnant. Then it’s happening like every fuckin day.

While Gaz gives very sensual massages, König is gonna give you a massage that hurts like hell but fixes your entire life. Massages are one of the few things I think he’ll actually indulge in and pay for from a professional. Dude has a lot of muscles that go through a lot of grief. I think his height and his age also make him a little more prone to aches and pains. That said, he will love whatever kind of massage you give him, but it’s more of the thought that counts, cause you’re not hardcore enough to break his back the way he usually gets it done. He will literally lay down and let you walk on him.

Nikolai also loves a massage as an act of service. Just shows you’re thinking about him and his comfort, which he finds to be very sweet. He’s partial to a hand massage— he does a lot of work that strains his grip and fine motor muscles, so it feels good to take off the gloves and have you press between his knuckles and knead the meat of his palms. The massages he gives are a bit between therapeutic and foreplay. He uses the opportunity to edge you, is what I’m saying.

[yamumsyadadd]

the shadow of alexia

At 4 years old my entire life changed. One day my dad was at home and the next he wasn’t. Things changed after that. Everyone was sad, lots of people visited too. Sometimes I got new toys when they came over. 

Alba was a scary teenager but Alexia. Alexia was my best friend and I was hers. She would take me to kindergarten and pick me up, she never missed a soccer game or ballet recital, she was always there. So was her special friend Jenni. Jenni was great, when I was little she used to let me colour in her tattoos, Everytime she got a new one, she’s get me new pens to colour on her. 

As time went on, Alba and Alexia started moving out. Alexia moved in with Jenni and started getting busy with football, Alba still lived with Mami but was busy with her friends and modelling. Mami did the best she could. She was getting older and more tired, she didn’t miss a game or my last ballet recital, she didn’t miss the disappointment in my eyes when Alexia or Alba didn’t turn up. They were busy, I understand. 

It went from seeing them a couple times a week, to once a week, to once a month. I learnt pretty quickly the only way to get Alexia’s attention was to either play football or to fuck up. Lucky for me I was good at both. School was boring, it was too easy, I understood it all faster than anyone else. The first time I skipped school, I was 14. No one noticed and no one cared. From there on out it became a routine. At least once a week I’d skip school and hang out with the others. 

I personally never did anything too rowdy, just tagged along to enjoy the vibes. The first time I got caught skipping school was by Virginia. She promised me she wouldn’t tell Alexia or Mami and she kept that promise. The next time was by Alba, she lost her shit. Yelling at me about how irresponsible I was being and how much trouble I would get in. The second last time I got caught was by Jenni, I hadn’t seen her in a while, I was mad at her because of that so when she tried to give me a lecture I yelled at her.

“Y/n, you can’t be doing this shit. If Alexia found out she would lose it at you! What would happen if the police got you? What would you do then?”

“Why do you care Jenni? Huh? You left, you haven’t been around. You fucked off to Paris and didn’t even say goodbye. Tell Alexia, I don’t care, at least then she would talk to me.”

“Y/n, did Ale not talk to you about this?” Her voice was incredibly soft. That was something I missed about her, the way she spoke, the softness that was hidden from most people. 

“She doesn’t talk to me at all. She doesn’t give a fuck about me.”

“Bebeita, we broke up. Thats why I left. we ended things and to be able to heal I had to leave. I am so sorry, she promised she would talk to you about it. I wanted to say goodbye to you myself but Alexia said it would be a bad idea.”

From there things spiralled. I didn’t want to talk to Alexia, I didn’t want to see her. I stopped going to her games with Mami, I would sneak out when I knew she was coming over. No longer did I look up to her, I hated her. I wanted nothing to do with her. 

The day I quit football, I felt free. No longer having to play to get my oldest sisters attention, I didn’t care for that anymore. I had more time to hang out with my friends, to be a normal fucking teenager. 

It took a week, it was quicker then I thought to be honest, but once Alexia found out, all hell broke loose. 

“Where the hell is she!” Alexia stormed through the house. Surprising Eli. 

“Who Alexia?” 

“The Idiota. Your mija?” Alexia huffed. Eli was surprised by the way Alexia was acting. 

“In her room with her friend.”  Before Eli could say anything else, Alexia was off. Swinging open the door and disturbing the peace between you and your girlfriend.

“You, get out.” 

“No Alexia. You don’t get to tell her to get out.” I got defensive fast. There’s no way she gets to come here and tell her she needs to leave. 

“GET OUT NOW!” Alexia’s ‘captain’ voice was something that always got people moving. 

“You don’t get to come here and act like you run the place. News flash alexia, you don’t fucking live here!” 

“¡Dios mío! What is happening! Why did Isabella leave crying?” Mami looked pissed. More so at alexia than me. 

“Alexia kicked her out. For no reason other than the fact that no one else is allowed to be happy but her.” 

“Tell her what you did!” When I was younger, the look she was giving me would’ve scared me, but now it did nothing. 

“I didn’t do anything alexia. Whatever your minions are telling you isn’t true. But hey, you wouldn’t listen to me anyway.” I tried to push past her, but she grabbed my wrist stopping me from moving. 

“Mami she quit football. She fucking quit. After everything I’ve done for her she throws it back in my face!” Rolling her eyes and scoffing at me. 

“Let her go now. I am aware she quit Alexia. She was only doing it for you.” Mami was mad, very mad. Alexia had come and disturbed the peace, making Isabella cry and screaming the house down. 

“Grab me like that again I’ll drop you on your ass. I don’t give a fuck that you are la Reina.” The words came out like venom. 

Everything is always about Alexia. I joined football to get close to her, I didn’t mean to get as far as I did, I honestly didn’t think I’d get past the academy. Being called up into the Barca B squad was cool. I enjoy the fitness side of it but genuinely couldn’t care less about actually playing. 

The same day I quit, was the same day I got called up for the senior team. It sent me into a bit of a spiral. Mapi found me in the corner of the physios room with my sketchbook, crying. 

“Oh nena! What’s wrong? Do you want me to get Ale?” 

“No! Not ale! Don’t tell her please!”

“Okay no Ale but can you tell me what’s got you so worked up?” 

“I got asked to join the senior team and I don’t want to. I only started playing so Alexia would be nice to me and talk to me. I don’t even like this stupid game! I just want to draw but that’ll never be good enough for her.”  

After that, Mapi and I would get coffee in the mornings, I would show her my new drawings and tell her my ideas. She paid me to draw a photo of her and Ingrid. I knew she could draw herself but it was nice to have her in my corner.  Mapi was talking more about to me Alexia, saying how good my drawings were and how much happier I seemed not having to play, she seemed to miss the confusion written all over Alexia’s face. 

 •———————————————————————•

Mami had a trip coming up, I knew about this, but what I didn’t know what she was going to make me stay with alexia. Isabella and I came home after the movies to find Mami, Alexia, Alba and some other chick sitting at the table. I mumbled a quick hello before trying to drag Isabella upstairs. 

“Don’t be so rude. Actually say hello.” Alexia spoke angrily. 

Scoffing I turned around “bite me Alexia.” 

“¡Dios mío! Isabella Mi vida, it’s time for you to go home. You can wait upstairs for your Mami.” 

“Mami no. That’s not fair. She doesn’t get to come in here and start bossing everyone around!” 

“It’s okay amor, I should go home anyway. We have that biology exam anyway.” 

“Now that your little friend is gone, sit down.” 

“No.” 

“SIT DOWN.” 

“Ale, Cálmate.” The mysterious brunette says as she places her arm on alexia’s. 

Fuck all this shit honestly. Turning as fast as I could I ran upstairs, knowing Alexia would follow quickly. I was right. I was barely able to push my dresser against the door before she tried to open it. I was not going to sit at that table and play happy families. 

After an hour of listening to Alexia curse, she finally gave up. It was peaceful until Alba climbed through my bedroom window. 

“Still got it.” 

“Alba what the hell!” 

“Hermana, I don’t know what happened between you and Ale, but if it’s the same thing that happened between me and you then you need to talk to her. She’s worried about you and scared. She doesn’t want to lose you.” 

“She only cares now that she thinks her precious imagine is going to get hurt.” 

“If you talk to her now, while Olga is here, it’ll be easier. She calms Alexia down and makes her think more rationally.” 

“Who the fuck is Olga?” Was that the mysterious brunette in the dining room?

“What do you mean? She’s alexia’s girlfriend? You’ve met her before?” 

“No I haven’t. I didn’t know she had a girlfriend.” 

“Yes you met her a dinner a few months ago? She comes to Ales games and on Fridays when we have dinner!”

“I wasn’t invited to that dinner, I don’t go to Alexia’s games and I certainly don’t go to Friday dinners!” The angry tears started. Alexia was my hero, my bestfriend, the person I wanted to be and now I’ve been pushed aside. I know nothing about her and she equally knows nothing about me. 

Alba pulled me in tight, letting me cry on her. It was weird doing it with her, she used to be the reason I cried and not the one to comfort me. But here we are, things change I guess. 

“Mami really needs to talk with you so we need to go downstairs.” Begrudgingly I let alba pull me down the stairs. It was obvious to everyone that I had been crying, mami’s face softening when she saw me, Alexia’s face frowning in confusion. 

“You wanted to talk so please do it quickly. I want to go to bed.” I tried to speak as respectfully as I could to Mami, it wasn’t her fault. 

“Mija, I’ll be away for a month, you know this si?” I nodded my head before she continued, “you’re too young to stay here for a month alone so you’re going to stay with Alexia and Olga. You can still see your friends and will go to school, but they will look after you.” 

“Mami no! I can look after myself!” 

“You’re 16 chica. You’re not an adult like you think you are.” Alexia scoffed from the other side of the table. 

“So what? You’re shipping me off to stay with Alexia, who won’t even been there half the time and a stranger? That’s safer? Some person that I’ve never met and sure as shit don’t trust!” 

“Stop being such a Perra! You have met Olga, plenty of times! She comes to all the games she can, and to dinners all the time.” 

“Ale stop” Alba knew what was coming and tried to stop it but it was too late. 

“Dios mío, your head is so far up your own arse isn’t it? I haven’t been to a single game in over 8 months, I don’t get invited to you stupid little Friday night dinners and I have never met your girlfriend! Up until an hour ago I didn’t even know you had a fucking girlfriend Alexia. Everything is always about you. You and your stupid football or your stupid knee. I bet you right now you couldn’t tell me anything about what I’ve done in the last year, can you?” 

“I know you quit football because you’re being a brat.” 

Her answer honestly made me chuckle “Okay Alexia, anything else?” 

Silence. She couldn’t tell you a single thing. 

“Yeah that’s what I thought. You know nothing about me and that’s how it’s going to stay. I dont trust you, I don’t like you and I sure as shit don’t love you. You’re not my Hermana.” With hot tears falling down my face, I stormed back upstairs. I text Isabella asking if I could stay over and once she replied with a yes, I was gone. Out the window like Alba had come in an hour earlier. I texted Mami to let her know, I wasn’t that horrible to make her worry. 

“Mami, you can’t let her talk to people like that! She’s incredibly disrespectful!” 

Alba rolled her eyes and scoffed. “Are you serious? That girl used to hang off you. She looked up to you. It was always you alexia and now she wants nothing to do with you. You don’t invite her places, you don’t care about her. I noticed ages ago she was pulling away and I fixed it. Did you know she has a girlfriend? Or that she’s taking senior classes because she’s the smartest there? Or the fact that people are paying her to make them art or buying the pieces she already has. She quit football because she hates it. She hates it because of you. You ruined it for her. Mami, I will stay here with her while you’re gone. It’ll be better that way. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to drop her off at Isabella’s.” 

“No! It’s a school night! She cannot be going out!” It seems everything that was just said to Alexia, went in one ear and out the other. 

“Alexia stop it now. She is allowed to stay at her girlfriend’s house, she has an exam at 1pm. Maybe you need to listen to what people are saying to you. I am going to bed, I suggest you all do the same, at your own houses.” 

“Why does no one listen to me!” Alexia was annoyed, overwhelmed and tired. It had drained a lot of her energy being here tonight. 

“Ale, I’m going to say this one time, you need to listen to what everyone has told you tonight, really listen, because you aren’t. You need to fix things with her but you need to sort your shit out first.” Olga had stayed silent most of the night, listening to everything that was said knowing her girlfriend wouldn’t. You were right, you had never met each other. What Olga didn’t realise was that it was Alexia’s fault, not yours. She put it down to being a moody teenager who was too cool to hang out with her sisters, oh how wrong she was. 

•———————————————————————•

Two days before Mami was meant to go away, Alba rang saying she couldn’t stay over. She had gotten a modelling gig in Madrid and needed to go, that left Alexia and Olga. It would be the longest month of my life. Mami promised nothing would change just because I was staying here, she was wrong. Alexia was a bitch. 

The first few days were fine, alexia would drop me off at school and I’d make my way home after, I generally spend it was Isabella because Alexia wouldn’t let her come over. We go into the city centre, get coffee and do our homework then catch the bus home. We did this even when Mami was here so it wasn’t anything new but when Alexia found out she hit the roof. 

“You cannot be going into the city by yourself! Are you thick in the head?” 

“Jesus Christ alexia! I’m not alone. Isabella is with me. Mami lets me do it so I’m going to keep doing it.” 

“Is Isabella the reason you’re skipping school too?”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” I scoffed, storming off the guest bedroom and slamming the door so hard it made Olga jump. 

By the third day of me being there, Alexia had turned up to pick me up herself. I tried to completely ignore her but Isabella had other ideas. 

“Your sister is death staring me right now.” 

“No amor, not you but me. Oh fuck here we go, she’s coming over here.” 

“Get in the car y/n.”

“No. I told you yesterday that I’m allowed to do this. You’re not the boss of me.” 

“Bebeita, it’s fine. I’ve got chores to do for papa anyway. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She kissed my cheek and then walked away, leaving me no choice but to get in Alexia’s car. 

The car ride was hell. Alexia was pissed, her hands constantly gripping the steering wheel so hard her knuckle turned white. Neither of us spoke. To be honest, I didn’t know where we were going until we turned up at the training ground. 

“Why are we here?” 

“We have training. Get out.” 

“No alexia. I quit. What part of that don’t you understand.” 

“Get out now, or I will drag you out.” 

Knowing she would literally drag me out, I had to wait it out. She’d turn her back eventually and I could leg it. I’m faster than her and more willing to jump fences. 

The time came sooner than I thought, after entering the change rooms, she threw a set of clothes into my chest and walked off to the bathrooms. This was my chance and I wasn’t going to waste it. 

Throwing the clothes into her cubby, I legged it out the door. Running past Mapi, Ingrid and Ona who all had confused looked on their faces. As soon as I got out, I kept running, knowing i had to get a head start. I wasn’t really sure where I was going, I knew I couldn’t go back to Alexia’s, Olga would be there. I couldn’t go home because that’s the first place she’d go, I couldn’t go to Albas because she drag me back by my ear. There was only one place to go. 

Can Cuyás Golf Culb was the best place to hide. Sure someone might see me, but it’s easy enough to pretend to be lost. 

The first thing Alexia noticed when she came out was the lack of you. Then the clothes she had given you, thrown back into her cubby. 

“Have you seen y/n?” She asked as she turned to the girls in the locker room. 

“She ran past us like 5 minutes ago?” Ona spoke up. 

“Did she say anything?” 

“No she was in a bit of a hurry Ale.” Mapi rolled her eyes at her best friend. 

“Fuck sake.” Alexia exited the locker room, walking through the facility to try and find you. Slight panic kicked in when she wasn’t able too. Deciding to call Alba first, knowing you’d been closer to her the past few months. 

“Hola Ale, to what do I owe this pleasure?” The sarcasm dripping from her voice. 

“Have you seen y/n?” 

“No why? What happened?” Panic arising in Alba. 

“I picked her up from school and bought her to training. Gave her clothes to change into and I went to the toilet and came back and she was gone. She fucking ran off.” 

“Why the hell would you try and make her train Alexia! She quit. She doesn’t want to play anymore!” Alba quickly became anger with the oldest Putellas. 

“She is too good to throw it all away! She’s being a stupid child about all of this!” Quickly becoming defensive, not enjoying the way Alba is talking to her. 

“You’re unbelievable. I haven’t seen her, I will try and find her. Don’t you worry, put your football above her like you always do.” 

“Alba-“ she hung up before alexia could get another word in. There was one person left that Alexia had to call. 

“Hola amor, why aren’t you training?” Olga’s sweet voice sounded through the phone. 

“I’ve lost y/n. Can you please let me know if she comes home and if she does then don’t let her out of your sight.” 

“What do you mean you’ve lost her Ale?” 

“I bought her to training and she ran away while I was in the bathroom.” Pinching the bridge of her nose, Alexia already knew by the silence on the other end that Olga was trying to not yell at her. 

“Alexia-“

“No I know okay. I already got an ear full from Alba. I have to go but I’ll call you later okay. I love you.” Slowly it started to creep in the fact that she had fucked up and caused you to run away. Training dragged on for Alexia, hoping that you had been found or made contact with Alba or even Olga. 

Meanwhile, after hiding at the golf course for an hour, i decided to head to Isabella’s house. Knocking on the door, Isabella answered, still buttoning up her shirt. Eyes wide when she realised I was at her door. 

“Wh-what are you doing here?” She closed the door slightly, so I could no longer see into the loungeroom. 

“I ran away from Alexia. I was hoping we could hang out like normal?” 

“Now’s not really a good time. I have someone here.” Isabella spoke quietly, not wanting to allude to the fact that the person inside wasn’t just a friend. 

“Baby come back, we weren’t finished.” A guys voice yelled out. 

“It’s not what you think y/n!” 

“I think that guy wants your attention. I’m guessing that’s the reason you’re half dressed. Enjoy your time with him, we are done.” Tears welling in my eyes. 

“I’m sorry y/n!” 

“Go fuck your self Isabella.” sadness turned into anger real quick. 

Isabella was my first girlfriend, my first kiss, the first person I had sex with and she goes and fucks a guy? While we are together? This is literally the last thing I wanted to deal with. 

Unsure on what to do, or who to call I found my way to the beach. My throat and eyes hurt from crying so much. The pain in my chest was getting worse. Pulling out my phone, ignoring all the messages and calls, I rang the one person who would calm me. 

“Hey Calabaza? What’s up?” Jenni’s voice rang through my ears. Unable to form a coherent sentence, only sobs coming out of my mouth. 

“Hold on Bebé” I could hear her moving around, the voices of her teammates getting quieter, “talk to me. What happened?”

“I ran away. I ran away from Alexia and I went to Isabella’s house and she-she was cheating on me. With a guy. A fucking dude. She broke my heart Jenni. It hurts so much.” 

“Oh babé. Where is Ale now? Where are you?” 

“I don’t know. She’s probably at training. I’m at the beach where Papa used to take us. She’s going to be so mad at me.”

“Can you tell me why you ran away from her?” The way Jenni spoke so sweetly was something I missed dearly. 

“She got me from school and took me to the training grounds. She was trying to make me train but when she went to the bathroom I ran away. I don’t want to train, I don’t want to play. I hate the game and I hate her. She doesn’t listen or care about me!” I could feel myself getting upset again. 

“Okay okay, just breathe. You’re okay. I’m not going to tell her where you are but I need to tell someone. Albs has messaged me and so has Olga. You can pick who I tell.” 

Pondering the options, Alba would tell Alexia but she’d also be just as angry and upset. Olga would tell Alexia but she’d be calmer and softer, that was what I needed at this moment. 

“Olga. But tell her not to bring Alexia.” 

“Okay bebé.” After a few moments she spoke up again, “she’s on the way. She promised no Alexia. Do you want to stay on the line with me until she comes?” 

“Yes please. Can you tell me about Mexico?” Sniffling and wiping my face, I got up, walking towards the road to wait for Olga. After 25 minutes, Olga pulled up. A sad smile and worry on her face, she put an arm around me. 

“Is Olga there now?” Jenni asked. 

“Yeah she is. Uh thanks Jenni. Sorry for disturbing you.” Embarrassed about haven taken her time. 

“No bebé, you don’t need to thank me or apologise. We are hermanas no matter what okay. You call me tomorrow when you’re feeling better. I love you.” with that she hung up. Reality slowing sinking it. 

“Let’s get you home yeah? Are you hungry?” Olga smiled sadly at me. 

“No thanks. Just tired.” I mumbled out. 

The drive back to Alexia’s was quiet. When we pulled up, Alexia’s car wasn’t there, meaning she wasn’t home. That was good. Very good. 

“She’s at Albas house. I told her you had messaged me but that I didn’t know where you were yet. It’s a small lie, but I’m sure it’s worth it.” 

“Alexia hates lying.” I said lowly. Thinking back to all those times as a small girl that she yelled at me for lying. 

“I know Pequeño. Do you want to tell me what happened today?” 

“Everyday Isabella and I go into the city and have coffee and do our homework, but today Alexia came to school and got me. She drove us to the training grounds and said I had to train. But I-i quit. I don’t want to play anymore, I don’t enjoy it and only did it for Alexia but it was never enough. Nothing I do is ever enough for her.” Olga grabbed my hand, giving it a squeeze for me to continue. 

“I went to Isabella’s house and she had someone there. A guy, a guy that she was fucking. She was cheating on me for god knows how long. I thought everything was good with us. She was my first girlfriend and my first kiss. I lost my fucking virginity to her and she goes and fucks someone else? It just hurts. So much. Everything is hurting so much.” 

“Oh pequeño. Come here.” Olga held me tight, my tears slowly soaking her shirt. 

“Why doesn’t she love me like she loves Alba? I don’t understand.” 

“Alexia?”

“Mhm. Nothing I do is good enough. I just want her to care about me more. Why can’t she?” It broke Olga’s heart hearing me say that. She didn’t know what was happening but she knew Alexia needed to fix it and fast. 

After slowly showering, I thanked Olga and excused myself to bed. I didn’t think I had any tears left to cry but after crying for a while, I managed to pass out. 

 •———————————————————————•

After you went to your room, Olga texted Alexia, telling her she was here and safe. Alba and Alexia both rushed back to her home. Angry and worried at you, ready to both give you an ear full. 

“Where is she Olga?” Alexia came in loudly. 

“Keep your voice down. Both of you.” Olga was very firm. 

“No she’s in trouble. She doesn’t get off lightly, we have been so worried about her.” Alexia sooke back angrily, usually she’d listen to her girlfriend but this had sent her into a rage. 

“Really Ale? You’ve been worried? So worried you couldn’t train right? That you spent all night calling her friends or going to her favourite spots to try and find her?” Olga had had enough. 

“Amor that’s not fair.” 

“No you know what’s not fair? The fact that neither of you have been listening to her. She doesn’t want to play, she did it for you Ale. She wanted to make you proud of her. She hated playing but you wouldn’t know that. She loves to draw, and she’s really really good at it. She showed me all her work.” 

Olga walked to the couch, extremely disappointed with the two women standing in front of her. 

“Her girlfriend cheated on her. She found out this afternoon. She rang Jenni and Jenni messaged me. That’s how I found her. She was at the beach, heartbroken. Then when we got home, she asked why you didn’t love her Ale. She thinks you don’t care about her. That girl may have broke her heart tonight, but you broke her heart first Alexia. You’ll need to live with the fact that you were her first heartbreak.” Olga was exhausted. Neither Alexia Or Alba said anything. Both sitting in opposite ends of the lounge room, tears silently falling. 

Olga excused herself to bed, leaving the older two in the lounge room to mull on their thoughts. She promised herself after your heartbreaking confession that she would have your back through this. Whatever tomorrow held, you would face it together. 

[cherryc1nnam0n]

On Film | OF!Eddie Munson x FEM!Reader

Summary: Eddie Munson is an Only Fans content creator who you decide to subscribe to and surprisingly, you go from watching him fuck others to getting fucked by him

Cw: Porn making, sex recording, unprotected PIV, creampie, lots of dirty talk, daddy kink, Dom!Eddie, Sub!Reader, masturbation (F and M), use of toys, slight ass play, mentions of shower sex, excessive cumming, porn watching, sexting, porn with some plot, strangers yo lovers

The day you found Eddie Munson will forever be engraved in your mind

You were scrolling through Twitter when a video of a guy jerking off made it on your feed

You usually didn't find that as a turn on, but he was different

Tattooes littered on his chest and arms, even his abdomen, he was completely naked with his dick in his hand and said dick was big, girthy even, his balls hung low, heavy with cum, his moans were making you even wetter, his long hair clouded his face perfectly and he was looking into the camera, almost into your soul

That night you masturbated to that video...

Another day when he made it into your feed you decided to follow his account

Eddiethebanised

22, DnD Dungeon Master and your Master ;) OF with 35% discount

His bio read when you entered his profile, he was so hot and his videos were even hotter, you scrolled down and found a video of him fucking a guy, this man had perfectly coiffed hair but it was disheveled from the fucking he was getting, and Eddie looked so gorgeous pounding his ass, both men moaning and panting

This whole was so tight @Stevethewhipped

You wondered if he only fucked men, because all you could see were dicks and not even one pussy but oh well, his content is great nonetheless

The day you subscribed to his Only Fans was magical, you had some spare money and were horny as hell, so you decided to go for it

Adding your card info it and paying the $5 it took to have all his content for a whole month

And then a notification rang on your phone

Hello sweetheart ;)

You gasped at that, did he really text you?

Thanks for the sub, have this in return

Followed by a picture of his hard dick laying against his belly

"Oh fuck" you said to yourself

Thanks, it's really big

You really didn't know what to say, was he trying to sext you?

Yeah, that's what everyone says

Why did you text me?

Idk, thought you were cute

You trynna fuck me?

Maybe

You don't know me tho

Then let's know each other, my name is Eddie Munson

But you already know that ;)

What's your name babe?

It's Y/n Y/l/n

Cute, where u from?

Indiana

Great, me too

You had an idea, might be risky but oh well, fuck it

Wanna see my tits?

Fuck yeah

You sent him a pic you had taken in front of your mirror a few days ago

Oh fuck baby, they're so pretty

That's what everyone says ;)

Haha, touché

You're making me wanna fuck you real hard

Thought you only fucked men?

I can make an exception

We can have fun babe, make a film out of it

Would you like to?

We can keep your face out

You pondered it, biting your lip, he was so hot and it has been a while since you've been fucked so, yeah, why not?

Let's do it

After some more sexting with Eddie and showing him what you looked like he was smitten, he might even be in love and he couldn't wait to fuck you, so you guys agreed on a date at his place

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you got there you were sweating bullets, you were about to be fucked by a stranger, one with a huge dick and most importantly, are going to film it for the public

He promised he would keep your face out, which is good at least

You rang the bell to his apartment complex and the guard let you in, probably used to random people being let in his house

On the 6th floor, you made it to his apartment and knocked on the door and were blown away by seeing him in person

His curls were kept together and he was wearing a Metallica shirt that was cut shorter to show off his belly, he also had some grey sweatpants that outlined his soft cock, even when soft you could see it

"Well, well, well, I've been waiting for you sweetheart"

He let you in and you took in his place, it was nice and full of stuff, trinkets, some amps, ring lights and some clothes thrown across the floor, a controlled mess as you would like to call it

"So uhm, how do we do this?" You asked nervously

You felt his hands massage your shoulders, he felt you were tense because hell you were

"Just relax baby" he kissed your neck softly "Let's go to my room, I have everything set up"

He led you into his room, where you saw all his videos you masturbated to, you bit your lip when you noticed he had some plugs and a vibrator ready, probably for you

"Alright babe, sit down and I'll start recording m'kay?"

You nodded and set your bag down, sitting down on his bed watching him start recording

"You sure you want to do this? Once we start, there is no going back"

Having him so close to you, smelling him, you said fuck it

"Yes, please fuck me Eddie"

He kissed you ferally, devouring your lips as he towered over you

"Good girl"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!" You moaned as Eddie kept fingering you with a vibrator at your clit, he had plugged your ass a while ago, your tits all out as he nursed on the left one, keeping his pace with his fingers

"Good girl baby, fuck keep moaning for daddy"

You were so close to cumming when Eddie pulled away, making you whine at the loss

"Oh what's wrong baby? Wanna cum? Not yet, you have to cum on my dick"

He pulled you by your hips closer to him, aiming his dick at you, his mushroom head was leaking pre cum as he rubbed it all over your pussy

"Please daddy"

He groaned "Say it again baby"

"Please daddy, fuck me"

That was all the confirmation he needed to push his dick deep inside you in one thrust, your eyes rolling back as he sighed

"You ready baby?"

You nodded at him, mind hazy

"Need you to use your words baby"

"Yes I'm ready daddy"

He grabbed your left leg and hiked it up on his hip, then pulled you even closer to him, your clit rubbing against his happy trail, his hips starting pistoning into you at a rough pace, your moans filling the room as his bed frame hit against his wall, the mattress creaking under you both

The camera and ring light were aimed directly at you being fucked, it was catching all the squelching sounds coming from your pussy as it was being destroyed by Eddie's massive dick, it stretched out so good you could tell he was big and the bulge on your stomach was there also to prove it

"Fuck baby, it's been a while since- fuck- since I fucked a pussy, this might be -agh- the best one I've fucked in forever" he said in between moans

You couldn't even form a thought in your head, any form of word has been fucked out of your brain as soon as he started moving, his cock head hitting your g spot so good you could see stars

"E-Eddie" you moaned weakly

"Yes baby? Oh look at you, all fucked out and dumb for daddy"

You just nodded at him, eyes drooping as you reached your orgasm again

"Gonn' gonn' aah, gonna c-cum" was all you could say

"Mmm, yeah I know babe, I can feel it, you're squeezing me so tight baby"

His left hand lowered down to your ass to play with the plug in it, making you lose it and cum all over him, back arching off his bed and a loud moan ripping out of your throat

"Yesss, good girl baby, fuck, so good for daddy"

He held you up against his dick, moving your body as if you were a fleshlight while thrusting in you to finally empty his balls into you, deep and warm cum piercing your womb

"Fuck, that's a good girl baby" he said rubbing your stomach as his dick kept twitching inside you as he kept cumming

"Fuck..." You said coming down from your ecstasy "That was so good"

"Yeah? You did so good for me"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You really thought after that you would just dress up and leave, and then watch the video when it would be posted

But instead, Eddie begged you to stay, offering you some of his clothes and even showering together, which ended up in being pressed against the wall while he rammed into you as you made out under the warm water

And after that, he ordered some food and you ate together, like you guys were used to this or you knew each other from life, which made you feel really cozy

"You know.." he said with his mouth full, then swallowed "I think, I think I love you"

You choked on your drink and had to take a second to stop coughing, to which he had to pat your back

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I said, I think I love you" he said now grabbing your hand "Please stay, don't ever leave, I know we started this because of sex but, we can be more than that, let me get to know you and you know me..." He smiled at you, those big doe eyes staring at you "What do you say?"

How could you say no? Maybe this could be something beautiful, he seemed like a nice guy, he didn't immediately throw you out after he had came inside you and you felt really comfortable with him, so, fuck it why not?

"Yes, yes I wanna do this Eddie" he smiled even wider than before and kissed you softly

"Good, because you're mine now" he grabbed your waist and threw you over his shoulder, taking you to his room again in the middle or giggles and laughs

Some days later, Eddie had finished editing the video and posted it to his Only Fans and his Twitter, with the caption being

Been a while since I fucked a pussy, but this pussy might be the one that ties me down 🩷

Yeah, let's just say you never left his life after that...

[theabigailthorn]

Do you think it’s ever too late to become an actor? Does someone need to have studied acting in school to succeed at it professionally?

uhhh... Hm, tough question. Depends A LOT on what you mean by "succeed." If by "succeed" you mean "make enough to live on just through acting, with no side-gig" then I gotta tell you MOST actors fail. I haven't succeeded by that definition and might never. Honestly, the one thing I've come to appreciate about acting careers since having started mine is that it depends HUGELY on macroeconomic conditions beyond anyone's control. The industry is having a shockingly bad few years: people with careers much bigger and more established than mine are getting dropped by their agents; whole agencies and production companies are going under; it's BAD bad out here.

As for age? Well, some actors don't start until relatively late in life. People will tell you Patrick Stewart didn't start until late, which is kinda true and kinda not, and either way happened in a fundamentally different industry so... [shrug] Would an older actor succeed now? Who can say! You'll have to wait a few decades and see how the older actors entering the industry now are doing in 2054.

I worry a lot about being too old already but at the same time I look at the actors my age who I know and most of them are dropping out or well into years long spells of not working. I get insecure about actors in my casting who are younger, but the ones I see and know about are the tiny minority so I have to think about my relative age in that context.

Ultimately, this isn't an industry you wanna get into if "career" is something you want. I'd advise setting a personal, achievable definition of "success." For me, if I can laugh about what I'm doing, then I'm succeeding. Whether that's a laugh of "Haha, YES! This RULES!" or "Haha oh god, what the hell is this?" - either way, if I can laugh about it then I'm doing okay!

[nonotnolan]

Bodily Betrayal

A collaboration with @vincentintheflesh -- He did amazing work with the photos for this piece!

"C'mon, Toby. You really aren't coming out to the bars with us?"  Matt was trying to guilt trip me for not going out on a Tuesday, and I was really starting to get sick of his shit.  Sharing an apartment with another gay guy had seemed like a really good idea at the start of the semester, but we weren't even halfway through the year and I was already regretting it.  It was fun to hang out with a party animal like Matt, but dealing with his antics 24/7 was exhausting.

"Look, I have, like... three different projects due by Friday, and if I want to keep my gym schedule I can't waste time partying or recovering from the hangover.  Maybe this weekend I can... the hell are you doing?"  Matt was patting my shoulder like he was showing me sympathy.

"You poor thing," he said, staring directly at my chest.  "He spends all that time at the gym pumping you up, and then he never does anything to show you off!  Who buys a sports car and keeps it stashed in a garage?"

I couldn't help but roll my eyes.  "You're seriously having a conversation with my body.  Stop being weird and... wait, what the fuck is happening?"  I couldn't feel my body anymore. My hands lifted themselves up to my ears, only I wasn't the one controlling my hands.  All I could do was watch as my hands planted themselves firmly onto the sides of my head, and pulled.  My head had somehow completely detached from my body!  "Matt, what the fuck did you do!?"

He just grinned at my body. "Hell yeah!  Let's ditch Toby, and I'll take you out for a great time."  My body tossed me-- my head-- onto the couch, where I landed sideways onto the cushions.  All I could do was watch in horror as Matt lifted off his own head off of his slender, tattooed body and placed it on my neck.  "Thanks for the ride, Toby! Why you don't take more advantage of this body, I'll never know."  He started groping my chest as he moaned softly to himself, and I could see my body's growing erection strain against the fabric of my shorts.

"I mean, I gotta check out what I'm packing prior to using it tonight, right?"  I tried to protest, but I was helpless to stop him from fondling my manhood.  "Damn, Toby, this is gotta be at least seven inches!" he said, stroking my own cock in front of me.  "I can't wait to pick up some twink at the bars tonight so I can test this bad boy out! I'm gonna hit up your closet and borrow one of your nice silk shirts.  Don't wait up!"

Unbelievable.  The thought of that asshole taking my body out for a joyride and getting my dick wet had me seeing red, but what could I do about it?  I was just a fucking head.  He didn't even have the decency to tilt me upright before he left.  Although... Matt did leave his body behind...  If Matt could talk to my body like it was a separate thing, maybe the reverse was also true? 

"Hey, buddy," I said, trying to get the attention of his body.  "What say we help each other out?  How about you put me on you neck and-- hey, don't walk away, asshat!"  God, even Matt's body was insufferable.  "C'mon, man, I can... what if I let you use my mouth?"  It felt gross, like I was trying to negotiate with a drunken asshole, but at least his body had turned around. I would do anything to avoid being stuck as just a head on the couch all night.  "Yeah, man. Use my mouth.  You want me to suck your nips?  Maybe give you a blowjob?  I'll even make sure to throw in a good wank session later tonight.  Just don't leave me on the couch!"

Matt's body dropped his pants to the ground and started thrusting his junk into my face.  I wanted to be mad, but I realized that he couldn't actually see what he was doing. I opened my mouth as wide as I could, and eventually his body figured out where to position me so that I could give him the best blowjob. Without my shoulders getting in the way, he was able to position me a lot closer to the base of his cock. I didn't have much of a gag reflex as a detached head, which was good because I don't think Matt's body would have stopped. At least he wiped my chin off on his sweatpants after he came.

"Okay, you had some fun, so now can you-- oh thank God!" Matt's body lowered me down onto his neck, and suddenly I had control over his entire body. Honestly, my first reaction was just relief that I had arms again, but the longer I stood there, the weirder it got. Looking down and seeing Matt's tattoo sleeves was trippy as shit, and his body barely had any muscle definition. Credit where credit was due, his skin was much softer than mine. The man was lanky as hell, but I couldn't deny that he took care of himself in his own way.

I looked at my temporary body in the living room mirror, testing the firmness of my new ass with a few squeezes. I had a sudden impulse to try and protect what remained of Matt's modesty, but fuck that. For one, I'd already had his dick in my mouth thanks to how horny his body had been. But mostly it came down the fact that Matt clearly had no qualms about getting my body naked as soon as he could, so I might as well repay the favor. I pulled down the waistband of his sweatpants to see an average five inches of uncut cock. Perfectly serviceable, but it explained why he was so enamored with mine.

Was Matt's body going to get bored with me and pull off my head the same way my own body had? I didn't want to risk it. I decided to talk out loud as I looked at my new body in the mirror. "Don't worry, you tattooed fuck, we'll definitely spend some time messing around. I can't exactly wear someone else's body and not test it out! Especially when I know that fucker's doing the same to mine. I bet he-- oh, fuck!" My fingers brushed over my nipples and I could feel that shiver travel down through the root of my cock. "Is it ready for round two already?" I gave my stiffening cock a few tugs. God damn that felt good!

Was his body that much more sensitive than mine, or were the new sensations just more intense for me? I brushed the head of my new cock and damn near collapsed to the floor when my knees buckled. "I don't care why it feels good, it's enough that it does!" I started stroking it with one hand while my other hand pinched my nipples. Did I know where Matt kept his lube? Honestly, his dick was leaking enough precum that I didn't need it. 

Normally I would have found the thought of jacking off in front of a mirror to be a total boner kill, but seeing my head on Matt's slender body was actually kind of hot. I started picking up speed, jerking it faster and harder until suddenly my hand shot off and slammed into the mirror.  "Ow, fuck," I yelled, cursing Matt's boney wrists.  "How the hell did I lose grip on his... oh."  I hadn't lost my grip-- his cock had completely detached from his body.  I couldn't help but laugh as I considered all of the possibilities.  Obviously I was going to be giving myself a blowjob, but I had a few other ideas in mind.

-------------------------------------

"Hey Toby, sorry for leaving your head on the couch all night," Matt said, finally coming up at 8:50 in the morning. He hadn't even bothered to get fully dressed after spending the night doing God knows what in my body. I assumed he left my good shirt in the car-- If he lost it to some random guy's apartment, I was going to be so pissed. If I was starting to feel a bit guilty about my plan, this just confirmed my resolve to go through with it.

I didn't want Matt to get suspicious, so I had his body put me back on the couch after I'd had my fun last night.  "You missed a good time last night," he said, rubbing his hands across my abs. "I met this absolute power bottom of a twink, and we... well, you and I both know exactly what the two of us did all night. I made sure to use a condom, don't worry.  Anyway, it's time to switch back."  He grabbed the top of his head firmly by the hair and yanked hard, pulling it off of my neck. Seeing him walk across the room like a headless horseman was unsettling, to say the least.

"I'm surprised you're giving my body back to me so soon," I said, glaring at him as he passed his head over to his body's outstretched hands.  Once his head was back in place, he reached down to deal with me.  I wanted so badly to slap the smug grin off his face, but I just needed to be patient.

He laughed at me, giving my nose a few honks before giving me my body back.  "Sadly, I think people would notice if my shoulders were suddenly twice the size as my old ones.  Besides, I know exactly how much time you spend in the gym to have a body this nice.  Nuts to that-- I'll just let you do the work for me!" I couldn't help but growl at that comment, and he responded by flicking my ear. "Easy, now. You can yell at me later-- I don't want to be late for class."

Once my head was back in place, I couldn't help but grab my pecs with both hands. I had missed this.  Feeling the massive slabs of meat under my fingers was so comforting.  I gave my pits a few quick sniffs.  I probably needed a shower after everything Matt had done in my body, but a quick spritz of cologne would have to do.  He was right-- we didn't have much time before class.

I looked over at him to see if he had noticed my revenge yet.  Based on the way he was palming his crotch, I think he had.  "Toby, where the fuck is my cock!?"  I had hidden his manhood in my sock drawer, not that I was gonna be telling him that anytime soon.  The fucker owed me.  Twelve hours of being dickless seemed like a good start.

I smiled back at him.  "You can yell at me later-- I don't want to be late for class."

[sallieraptor]

[huge post about Mastermind]

I'm thinking a lot about everyone's faces when they saw Blitz on the guillotine.

so here's a yapping post. a big one! you can say it's an analysis? a shallow one, with my interpretation of what was going on in their heads and some hcs. just for me, so I can get these worms out of my head !

starting with Moxxie,

who politely protested throughout the whole trial, was in denial the entire time, spoke his mind several times, and tried at all costs to defend Blitz. when Blitz's sentence sank in his mind, he could only cry, close his eyes and bury his face against Millie's body to seek comfort from her.

being the first to be recruited, taken out of prison and taken away from the dark mafia life by Blitz, Moxxie did what he does best, spoke up, and continued to try to save Blitz, just as Blitz first saved him.

how could he bear the loss of the person who saved him from the clutches of his abusive father? how could he watch the death of the first person who made him smile after going through hell? the person who gave him hope after he was abandoned and thrown behind bars?

of course he sought comfort on Millie and couldn't bear the thought of watching Blitz die. Blitz was like a re-start in Moxxie's life, he was the one who gave him a second chance. who pulled him out of the hole he was sinking into.

and Moxxie tried to speak, he really tried to stop it. he questioned Satan, more than once. when Andrealphus said that Blitz was forcing himself on Stolas, and they muzzled Blitz, Moxxie was the one who protested. he was the one who said that that wasn't what really happened.

the whole time Moxxie was in denial, until the last second. he couldn't accept that he was going to lose Blitz there. so he cried, and the only thing he could do was cover his eyes.

Millie,

who didn't say a single word during the entire trial, but kept an eye on Blitz the entire time. so much so that, when Blitz looks at Loona, Millie looks at her too, worrying not only about him, but about Loona's future as well. worrying about how she's feeling right now.

when the chains pull Blitz to his knees, the ax rises and he looks at them one last time, Millie is the only one who doesn't look away at any point and continues to make eye contact with Blitz until the end, while continuing to comfort Moxxie.

being the last to be recruited, and apparently being the person Blitz trusts the most to take care of things, knowing how much Blitz believes in her potential, I believe that in that moment, by the way she acted, Millie was clearly understanding that she would be the new person responsible for taking care of everything for Blitz. responsible for taking care of Loona, of Moxxie, of everything that's left. take care of Blitz's family. and she would do it willingly.

the only moments Millie closed her eyes were to process the things that were being said. other than that, she continued looking at Blitz, Loona and Moxxie. silently observing the situation, checking each one of them.

I don't know why she didn't speak. maybe she felt like she shouldn't, that she couldn't. because after all, fuck, look where they are! it's Satan in front of them! even if she spoke, would anything change? she probably thought it would make things worse. after all, she is the muscle of the team.

and as much as she knows how to deal with this currently, I believe that in this moment of tension, there is no way to prevent these sabotaging thoughts from surfacing. it's a delicate situation.

but anyway, there she was, watching Blitz until the last second, holding Moxxie, and I'm sure she was internally promising herself to take care of Loona. exactly the way Blitz, - her best friend, the person who opened new doors in her life - would like.

Loona,

who was deprived of protesting throughout the trial, the only one to have been immediately muzzled and collared, treated harshly like an animal, just as she was treated during the years she spent in the shelter.

she tried all the time to convey her feelings to Blitz through her eyes.

[hc moment lol] their relationship is certainly one of my favorites, and I can only think that at that moment, Loona was probably feeling a lot of guilt. even though she loves Blitz with all her being, and is forever grateful for him (which is no secret), I keep thinking that she must be replaying in her head all the times she treated Blitz rudely, every time she yelled at him, fought with him, every time she hesitated to call him "dad". imagine thinking about all this and not even being able to defend him. not being able to even say "dad" one last time.

anyway, ignoring the hc, I think it certainly hurt her deeply to see him there without being able to say or do anything. of course she couldn't bear to watch his death, the person who saved her, gave her home, food, and love. the person who, despite always getting on her nerves, it's her dad. a extremely loving dad. of course she turned her face away and closed her eyes. watching him die would be too much to bear.

Fizzarolli,

Fizz knew that Ozzie was on a trial, but on Blitz's trial?! can you imagine the feeling of despair when he saw Blitz's face on tv?

the urgency he felt when he saw the face of the boy he grew up with on tv, the face of his childhood best friend! more than that! we all know that it's undeniable that there were at least a situationship going on between them. it's obvious the affection and love they had and still have for each other.

the despair that Fizz must have felt, at the thought that he was going to lose a person that he had just gotten back, just re-established a relationship with, a healthy relationship! after all the shit they went through together.

and damn, he must have thought he could do something. so much so that he desperately asked Ozzie to do something! Ozzie was there! shit, do something!

and when the blade was about to cut Blitz's neck, the only thing Fizz could do at that moment was hold his phone tightly and watch. watch someone he loves leave. once again.

Verosika,

oooof as a Verosika apologist this scene made me completely sick BUT I'll try to say what I thought in a not so crazy way.

from what I read in her eyes, she seems to be feeling a lot of anguish. this is obvious, you don't need to be a genius to understand.

the point is, I constantly see people hating on Verosika for nothing, especially after Apology tour. and I'm not really going to go much into this subject now, but it's OBVIOUS that Verosika still cares about Blitz.

I don't think she still feels anything ROMANTIC for him, but it's undeniable that she cares. if she didn't care, she wouldn't have sat next to him and talked to him in Apology tour, wouldn't have listened to his point of view, wouldn't have let him talk about his feelings.

I see a lot of people seeing Verosika as a villainous and evil person towards Blitz, and honestly, if you think like this, you are simply blinded by your love for him. really.

she is a hurt woman, who had found a cool and fun boyfriend, who made her laugh and feel happy. she loved him, and was abandoned and stolen by the same person. of course she was mad at him for so long. and we don't know what their relationship really was like, who knows what their real dynamic was? we can only imagine based on angry and spiteful comments made by both of them.

either way, Verosika's heart was deeply broken, she was overcome with confusion and frustration at not being chosen, at not being loved back. but that doesn't change the fact that she loved him, that she cared about him.

it's obvious that her heart sank as she watched his execution. how could it not? a person she once loved, who made her feel so many things, was being sentenced to death right before her eyes. and all she could do was move closer to the tv and watch.

Stolas,

oh, about Stolas .... who was probably slumped on the couch for days, trying to cope with his favorite novela, just like Blitz in Ghostfuckers.

damn, the number of beats this man's heart must have skipped. seeing the face of the man he loves, on tv, about to be executed. all because of him.

his feelings are self-explanatory. he got up from the couch, went to the trial and stepped in front of Blitz. he risked his life to save him. how could he not?

I see a lot of people interpreting Stolitz as if Blitz forced Stolas to do something, or vice versa, but??? please, no!

Blitz never forced Stolas into anything. Stolas genuinely loves him. and he would easily risk his life for him over and over again.

it's not the first time Stolas has saved Blitz. the difference is that this time, Stolas risked absolutely everything he had, even though he was still pissed and extremely hurt by Blitz. he risked everything to save him again. after all, Blitz was the one who saved him first.

and he is extremely grateful for that. no matter how upset he is. Stolas loves Blitz deeply, and would never be able to bear the thought of losing him forever like this.

in conclusion, this all makes me think of Barbie. did she saw? if so, what did she feel? seeing her twin brother who she holds such a grudge against because of their past. I'm looking forward to seeing more of them!!!

[danexist]

Going to actually make an addition instead of hiding in the notes because this will be LOOOONG.

So. Doctor Who: one of the longest running, most loved shows on television to date. I love it, my parent's generation love it, my great aunts and uncles love it. But this great show that's been running for longer than my father has been alive, recently, it's gone downhill according to MILLIONS of viewers.

So what made it so loveable in the first place? Well, it was a really fun show about a time-travelling alien who runs around in a blue box with a companion. That's basically the gist, if you haven't seen it. But I hear stories from my grandma even, she and her siblings would watch Doctor Who on TV after dinner whenever it was on, well, after they got a TV that was. When it wasn't on, my grandma's generation would talk about what would happen in the next season, who the Doctor would be next, everything! They knew a next season was coming for certain. And I think that's what made it a really great show for my grandma and her siblings at least, a sense of reliability.

But what's that got to do with us, here in 2024? Since 1972, a lot has changed. Channels have been added, you could tape things, record them for later, DVDs came out, and now, we are in the age of the streaming service. The show has been running since 1963, and television as a whole has changed. Through 15 Doctors, 41 seasons and 2 different renewals, it's DEFINITELY changed. But it followed mostly the same 'alien-of-the-week' format, and I'd say the new season does that, it's just how it has been excecuted.

So, the show that kids have grown up loving for the past 60 years, FOR FREE might I add, is basically hidden behind a pay wall. In Australia, we grew up with the show on the ABC. I don't actually know if the new season was ever shown on the ABC, but it sure as hell isn't on iview. To find the absolutely appalling, very very short season of television, you have to find it on Disney+. It's no longer the show you'd get on Channel 22 after Spicks and Specks, it's another streaming service 8-episode show that's going to be forgotten in 8-10 weeks.

But what in the new show is bad? What about it makes it so easy to hate? First of all, Ncuti Gatwa is a fantastic actor, but it's similar criticism to Jodie Whittaker's Doctor, great actor, terrible writing. Why is that? Well, opposed to Russell T. Davies' first seasons of Doctor Who, it is complete and utter garbage. We have gone from Rose Tyler, the girl who wrote herself into the stars because she loved the Doctor so much, to Ruby Sunday, an overall forgettable companion who could do so much better if they had better writing happening. People talk about Rogue, saying it was a really great episode of television, but look me in the eyes and say it didn't remind you of series 1, episodes 9-10, The Empty Child and The Doctor Dances or Torchwood series 1, episode 12, Captain Jack Harkness. Why is that? Because Russell T. Davies has basically just recycled the same character he wrote 20 years ago, Jack Harkness. He could have done something better, like recast the character of Jack Harkness (don't get me started on that drama, that's a whole different can of worms) with Jonathan Groff and created a seriously great few episodes, but he didn't. And to end a first series with a finale relating to episodes of television tons of the viewers don't remember or are too young to have watched, it's a crappy way to end it.

The fact that it is only 8 episodes long totally astounds me. They have been doing 22 episodes or 12 at the least per series, but this time it's different. It's nearly like they're TRYING to create an immediately laughable version of Doctor Who. I, personally believe Disney had something to do with that, but that's a different post. We used to have action-packed 22-episode series of television we could talk about until the next one came out, but now, we are simply left with an overall forgettable series of television.

Do better, BBC.

[blingblong55]

What Would I do?-Simon "Ghost" Riley

A/N: I woke up, wrote this in the middle of the night, listened to my sleeping playlist and decided that you could need this, so...here you go. All the events aren't written in chronological order, but rather moments at random that lead to something...I won't spoil this part, so read it, babes. I know this isn't to the quality of the latest ones I've put out but just bare with me on this one, I had a lot of ideas! And you’re more than welcome to search the title on Spotify, it’s a good song that obviously matches this fic

-- F!Reader, established!relationship, fluff, boyfriend!simon --

Boyfriend, what a word for a man like him. Is it the sweetness of your touch? Could it be the way you are so gentle with him? Maybe it's the way he found himself driving to your place instead of his own after a long day of work. Whatever it is, the answer to all his problems is you. You, you, you, and lovely you. 

From the beginning, he told you he isn't a man that will ever be called a husband. You, of course–saddened by this comment–just nodded and accepted it. He always meant it because, with the life he's had, there is no way in hell he would want to add to his worries. Plus, he doesn't need love, doesn't need the companionship. It's just him and the stress he carries. 

Then, you came in. 

"Before we begin this, I won't ever marry you, I'm not sorry if you feel bad, it's just my decision." He states and since it's a fresh relationship, you nod, "I understand." 

From then on, he didn't need to remind you. It was always in the back of your head that no matter what, he'd stay a boyfriend. Even now, five years into a relationship. Living in separate places, and different friend groups, your love for him persists and you stay through the good and bad. Maybe it's because even if you'll never wear the wedding dress in your Pinterest board, you will have him, for however long he'll have you. Please, god let it be forever. 

--

"I can't sleep," you say over the phone. This is how it started. How after one year together, he finds himself driving to your place, you didn't ask for it but he won't let your insomnia ruin your day off. What is it about you that has him finding ways to make your life better? Could it be that you drove to pick him up one time from the airport? Maybe it's the way kissing you feels? No, that can't be. Is it that you understand him? Maybe. 

Whatever it is, he unlocks your front door with the spare key you gave him. As he approaches your room, he finds you listening to the song you said reminds you of him. What's this weird feeling in his chest? Why does this scene make him feel warm? Goosebumps, no, he never gets goosebumps. 

He pushes your door gently and you turn around. "Simon, hi," you immediately pause the song, hoping he didn't recognise it in time. But he did and that caused him to smile—oh silly girl. "Hi, lovie," his voice much softer now. Hesits down, wraps an arm around your shoulder and kisses your head. "What's in that pretty head of yours, hm?" he asks and at the same time, you find yourself to be more comfortable in his hold. 

"Everything," you mumble and that's when you hear that deep and soft chuckle of his.

Within five minutes, he finds himself lying in bed with you, holding a book he found on your nightstand. He looks down at you, your head resting on his chest, right where it belongs. 

As you close your eyes, that's when you hear it, he starts to read out loud. Usually, he would just lay in bed until you fell asleep. But not tonight, something told him to just read to you. Is it that maybe he wants you to be comfortable? Toprovide you what you provide for him? Whatever it is, it has got him here. His voice is soothing, it's calming in many ways. He doesn't understand it, no matter how many times you explain that you love it. 

--

"Lovie?" he calls out to you when he arrives at your place. This is the first time he calls you a pet name. It feels...odd but good to do this. He steps further into your place, the lights are dim, something he knows you love because it makes the rooms more "aesthetically pleasing to walk into". "Love?" he calls out and that's when panic sets in. 

You always answer, to the first time he calls your name. 

He rushes into your room, only to see you asleep. There is a moment when his gaze softens. It's almost comical how much he has changed. How much he has wanted to change. 

He was never like this with past partners, I mean he did like them and all but with you, he is trying and trying to understand all your creases, to become someone worthy of much more than that sweet smile you give him. So, he leans by the doorway to your bedroom and watches you sleep. 

How can someone be so beautiful at all times? How can you make him feel so...good? So safe and happy? God, he loves you. And as he watches you sleep, he feels his chest warm up, something odd and for a second it feels like he is getting a heart attack. But then he realises it.

He is in love...true love. 

--

"What's this?" he asks as one day he finds you, sitting by the dining table with a cake and a candle. 

"It's your birthday, and I know you don't celebrate but...maybe this can be a one-time thing," your voice soft and that's when he feels his chest tighten. He drops his bags, makes sure the door is locked and sits beside you. He pulls you onto his lap and wraps his arms around you. You light up a singular candle, holding the small cake to him. 

At this moment, when the only light comes from the candle and the kitchen hood lights, he can take his mask off and appreciate how you gently sing for him. This was the first time he celebrated his birthday, well...first time in over a decade where it felt good to do so.

When he blows the candles, his gaze shifts from the cake to you. You kiss his forehead and his brows furrow whilst his eyes close. God, this is home. "Happy birthday, Simon," you whisper as you set the cake down. 

Maybe heaven is real after all. His faithless prayers were answered and his angel arrived. 

--

Coughs, headaches and long naps.

Simon has been sick for three days so far and has possibly got the best nurse around. You.

"Eat–"

"I'm not hungry, y/n," he says but you give him that mum look. "Eat, Simon." you persist and he sighs, opening his mouth as you feed him a spoonful of soup. You smile as you watch him eat. It worries you that this is the first meal he actually accepts but you're also content about it. "S'good," he comments and you nod. Of course, it's good, you think. 

As you leave the room to get him some warm tea, he lays there, appreciating the past days. He wouldn't admit it but he loves this, loves to get pampered by you. It's the first time in so long that where feels cared for, like someone out there means all the little things they do to make him feel better. 

--

Dinner at your family's house. He is nervous even though he's been here before. This time he feels different, there is something in the air tonight. He holds your hand as you walk through the threshold. 

Greeting family members was always the longest part but if you enjoy it, so will he. 'God, this wasn't me before you came in, Y/N,' he says to himself. 

Sitting around the family room, your sibling's children run around and while you get carried away talking and gossiping with your siblings, he finds himself being the centre of attention to all the children. "Uncle Simon, I want to fly like a plane again!" one of the younger kids exclaimed. You look around and see him there, holding a child in his arms, the biggest smile on him as he watches the child giggle while he parades them around the room as if they were a plane. 

He puts the child down, looks over at you and his gaze softens. Your heart melts at this. He has never looked so perfect like right now. 

On the drive home, he holds your hand in his as he drives. 

There is something in the air. Something sweet that screams future life. He looks over at you for a second then back at the road. That's how he finds himself picturing you and him, moving in together, settling down and running around the house you both call home, chasing your children while he tries to fix the light in the kitchen. 

Domesticty is what he craves when it's just you two.

--

There came a time when he lay in bed with you, shirtless with only his boxers on as he laid his head on your chest. Hisarms lazily resting at your sides, bodies intertwined while he listens to your heartbeat. Your hand caresses his back while the other runs from his neck to his hair. He hums, slowly mumbling about his day. Maybe after all havingsomeone isn't the end of the world. 

He closes his eyes, taking in the comfort of your hold, the bedsheets and the safety he feels at this exact moment. 

--

Three days, that's how long it took for a mission to last before he calls you, mid-day for him, midnight for you. "My love, where are you?" he asks in a panic. "Home, why? Is everything okay?" you ask before he cuts you off. "I was taking a nap and dreamt that you died," he says, nearly out of breath. 

"Trust me, it will be hard to get rid of me, you've got me for at least thirty lifetimes," you say with a smile and he can hear it. He loves it when you distract him with witty comments. "I better have you for more than thirty, my love," he says at that moment, the nickname feels right. More than right. He wants to keep calling you that until his dying breath. 

--

It was a random evening. You were stuck figuring out some hobby of yours as he cooked dinner. And as he waits for the food to be done baking he leans on the counter and looks out the window. 

He thought about the one time he dodged a failed relationship with you. 

What if you hadn't sat down and talked it out? Would you be in another man's arms? Would you be giving them the kisses that belong to him? What if your cuddles belonged to another guy? 

Your laugh rings in his ears and he can't imagine you laughing at any other man's jokes but his. Who but you to laugh at his jokes, your hand on his shoulder or chest as your eyes crinkle at the corners like always? 

It hits him suddenly that all those years ago when he told you that he would never be someone's husband should have never been said. You know why. It is because he won't be someone's husband, not when in his mind he has been yours all along. Sure he doesn't have the official title but the nose kisses you give him, the ones where he pretends to hate them with a grumble are something. 

--

"There is something, something I lied about years ago when I met you." he begins. You're in his lap, surely it isn't to end this sweet love. "I find myself hating on what I said, hating that it's been a lie. I love you," his voice softens at those three words, he sighs and looks into your eyes. "I have no idea what my life looks like from the outside, but when I look at my future, there is one thing I see," he clears his throat. "You, I see you and me. I always thought of myself as the guy everyone forgets about, because he had three friends and that was it."

He takes your hand in his, "And then, you came along, and I see a life, I see myself in ways I never did before. Youchanged me, you make me want to keep coming home, coming to hold you, to show you I will never break my promise." His lips find your knuckles, "I have no fucking idea what life is after you because I don't want a life after you, I want my life to be spent here. I have no clue what or who I was before you came into my life. What would I do without? No clue but I know what to do with you now," he looks into your eyes and you see how much he means every word. 

"Just promise me this, stay with me." he gently gets up and your gaze shifts as now you look up at him. "Stay, because I am nothing but a lifeless soldier, looking for someone and I'm done looking, y/n, I found you and that's all I need now," he says. 

He gets down on one knee, "Y/N Y/L/N, will you marry me?" He asks, his gaze full of so much hope and in that moment, your heart races. Tears well up in your eyes and you nod. Speechless but with a huge grin, you nod. 

"Yes," you manage to say. You don't even notice the ring, but you feel him slide it onto your ring finger. He smiles, like a child on Christmas as he gets up and embraces you, making sure this isn't him creating an illusion. 

"Oh, my love," his voice muffled, face buried in your neck. "I love you so much and I will prove to you that this wasn't a mistake. I will make you the happiest woman alive," he says, pulling away and kissing you with conviction. 

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[artemisnightingale216]

I've been thinking about this image a lot since yesterday (mainly because it was funny before the reality of it set in).

Like, how hard did the depression actually hit Lucifer? Was it a gradual decline or did he just give up altogether? We've seen the aftermath and how distant, forgetful, and absentminded it made him, but what was he like before?

And how long did it take the other Sins to realize Lucifer wasn't coming back any time soon? Did they wait for him at the meetings? The hearings? How long did it take for them to stop taping their fingers and twiddling their thumbs for them to say, "Fuck it. Let's start without him and fill him in later?" How long before they just got started once everyone else arrived, not even bothering to wait anymore? Did they reach out and try to bring him back to his old self or did they just wipe their hands clean of him? I'd like to think Ozzie and Bee would have tried repeatedly because, let's face it, they're the most caring of the Sins we've seen interact with the cast. Hell, maybe even Mammon broke out a few of the old clown routines to try and get Lucifer laughing, like old times. Who knows?

At the end of the day, though, there's really only so much a person (or even demon royalty) can do before one has to realize that the person they're trying to care for has to make an effort, too. Otherwise, they're just wasting their time, and they're probably busy enough as it is.

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

Imperfections and All

|| Jinx x fem!reader

|| Warnings; Jinx having a breakdown, crying, hearing voices, seeing people that aren't there, brief season two/end of season one spoilers, reader comforting Jinx

|| Summary; when reader finds Jinx, Jinx isn't fully there.

Requests closed!

Started; December 1st

Finished; December 1st

HurtCember2024; Day 2, Breakdown

~~~

A familiar cold laughter filled the air. You'd walked into your girlfriend's workshop, taking light steps over the metal surface. Walking through here always made you nervous; there were no railings. So you made sure to tread carefully.

"Jinx?" You called. The laughter didn't seem to stop. It continued until you found her. Curled up in a ball under her workbench. Eyes wide, head in her hands. Gripping at her hair while muttering nonsense to herself. You hated seeing her like this. It pained you knowing the girl you loved went through everything that she did. Jinx didn't deserve it. Nobody deserved this.

Her eyes snapped to you. You weren't sure if she was even seeing you. That happened, sometimes. Jinx would look at you and say another name. Sometimes Vi, Claggor, Mylo, even Vander and Caitlyn. Lately Silco. It was always another name when she was like this. But never yours. That had to be a good sign, right? Your voice wasn't tormenting her. "What're you looking at, Mylo? You happy? Turned into the Jinx you always thought I was." Jinx's words came out as a spit. Making you frown.

Slowly, carefully. You moved yourself under the workbench. Settling down beside her. Your skin brushing against each other. "It's me, Jinx." You assured her. Hesitant at first, but slowly your hand moved to her knee. Cupping it in an attempt to ground her. It didn't. Jinx flinched away from you, eyes wide. She hid her face in her hands again. Continued mutters, a lot of 'shut ups'. Never directed at you. Never you.

"Hey..." You reached out again. Gently taking her hands from her face and bringing her into your arms. Jinx tried to fight it. But caved and sobbed into you. Maybe she realized through her breakdown that it was you holding her. Or she was just desperate for comfort. You weren't sure. It could be either or something else entirely with her. You held her regardless. Whispering soft phrases of comfort. Trying to ease her back to you.

You weren't sure how much time had passed before you faintly heard what sounded like Jinx muttering your name. You looked to her and she lifted her head up. Eyes red from the tears that had fallen. They were softer, though. Nothing like the look Jinx had when you first found her. "How long have you..."

"Not sure," you admitted. Knowing she was asking how long you'd been there; wondering how much you had seen of her breakdown. Jinx sighed and slumped against you. Tired out from it all. Eyes half lidded. Your hands found hers, keeping them in your lap. Gently tracing her knuckles to soothe her.

"Why do you stay..?" Jinx asked after a long moment of silence. You didn't have to think about it. You knew exactly why. You loved her. Regardless of her faults. Jinx was yours; you would help her through hell if you had to. It didn't matter to you. As long as you got her.

"Because I love you. Imperfections and all."

Jinx's eyes searched yours. Looking for any sign of a lie. The slightest bit of hesitation. Anything to convince herself you weren't being truthful. But when she found none, her shoulders eased. Reminding herself you weren't like the others. You weren't her sister. You weren't Mylo, Clagger, Vander, Caitlyn. Or even Silco. You were you. Always there. Reminding her how much you loved her, no matter how insane she got. How out of place she felt. It never mattered to you. All that you wanted was her. Your loyalty was one of the things Jinx clung to. If she lost you...

The atmosphere was calmer now as Jinx's eyes met yours. The faint smile on your lips bringing her back to reality with you. "There you are," you murmured. Hand cupping Jinx's cheek. Feeling when she leaned into your touch. Jinx's arms wrapped themselves around you. Her legs clinging around your waist. Looking a lot like you had a koala attached to your front. Her face buried into your neck. You let the girl get comfortable. Knowing it was what she needed now more than ever," I've got you. I always will," your head came down and your cheek pressed to the top of Jinx's head. Your own arms latching around her. Trying to get impossibly closer.

"I love you, too," you could faintly hear Jinx's voice. Quite a bit quieter than how she normally spoke with you. The bubbly, energetic version of herself buried deep within. But her words were genuine nonetheless. You smiled and kissed the side of her head. Understanding that she just needed sometime to find herself again. A search you would gladly be the guide for.

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

the most you can do to “put the cat to bed” at night is to have a designated room for the cat to stay in at night, keeping a litter box and cat furniture in there. if you have a lot of breakables, this might be an ok idea, but really, it won’t save them, the cat(s) will just break them when they’re bored during the day, so you should have them put away where the cat(s) can’t reach them at all times and play with your cat(s) for at least 15 mins daily (even if you don’t have breakables, this is just proper cat care, they need the enrichment).

im always astonished at how little so many people know about cats, even people who HAVE cats. you can’t control cats. you can train them, but that’s not the same thing, and only very few cats will still do the stuff you’ve trained them to do without a reward waiting on the other side, so if your cat is only motivated by food, for example, good luck trying to get them to do anything without a treat. that’s why you need to catproof your house.

some cats can open cabinets and so you need a baby proof lock on any cabinets that have chemicals or other dangers, and anything else you simply don’t want your cat(s) to get into. cats can and will jump up on the kitchen counters, and if you ‘discipline’ them by yelling at them or spraying them with water, they’ll just stop doing it when you’re there but continue behind your back (and start to dislike you), so you can only mitigate this by 1) getting a motion-controlled air canister that lets out a puff of air to startle them when they jump on the counter so they’ll stop doing it (this works because it doesn’t matter if you’re there or not, and unlike ‘discipline’ it doesn’t deteriorate your bond with your cat bc it’s not you doing it, as far as your cat is concerned, the counter is doing it), 2) putting a door or room divider or something in the kitchen doorway so they can’t get in the kitchen unsupervised, or 3) just cleaning your kitchen counters before and after you cook, so it won’t matter if your cat(s) goes/go on the counter bc you remove any potential contaminants before cooking and remove any potential dangers to your cat(s) after cooking. lots of cats do actually need outside time, but it’s super dangerous to let them free-roam, so you should build a catio or harness-train them—and many cats CAN be trained to walk on a leash and harness, with a lot of patience and positive reinforcement (aka lots of treats), but you shouldn’t expect them to go on a walk the way a dog would: you should carry them through the threshold to reduce the risk of them running out the door when it’s open (cat walks out the door independently = “the door is my ticket outside,” cat is carried out the door in your arms or a carrier = “my human/harness/carrier is my ticket outside”), and THEY decide where you go, NOT you.

i wish people knew as much about cats as they do about dogs. ignorance of cats is what leads to people thinking they don’t love humans or even each other (not true, cats are very social creatures and many are even clingy once they get comfy with you, they just generally aren’t as obedient or trusting or dependent on humans as most dogs), and people mistreating their cats & then blaming the cats for acting out even tho their needs aren’t being met (most often, people don’t play with their cats, and then the cat gets bored and destructive, and the human labels the cat as the problem even tho a healthy cat that plays enough will not destroy things or attack you for no reason, healthy cats only do that stuff because they’re BORED AS FUCK—most episodes of My Cat From Hell are literally just people blaming their incredibly bored cats for acting out bc of boredom, and jackson galaxy saying “your cat is bored, play with them” and teaching them how to play with cats properly and also telling them they need to clean the litter box more often or get more litter boxes so their cat doesn’t go to the bathroom outside the box or helping them set up cat furniture so the cat can feel safe and comfy in the home they live in or other stuff that should be cat owner knowledge 101, but, for some reason, just isn’t)

[revelboo]

Could we have more for "Gravity"? 🙏 reader making it her life's goal to see robot dick as soon as she realizes it flusters OP is so me-coded and I'm living for it. I love your super serious emotional fics, but I also love the human being so unserious 🤭

Honestly, same. 18+ content

Gravity Pt 9

Optimus Prime x Reader

• Pacing outside the door of his habsuite, he runs a frustrated hand over his face. Trying to get himself back in control, because you don’t realize what you do to him. Asking about that. Had it only been curiosity or was it actual interest? Why is that difference so very important to him? And something he really shouldn’t be thinking about at all. You’re his to protect, considering anything else, wanting more, is wholly inappropriate.

• Sitting cross legged on the berth where he’d left you, there’s nothing to do but wait for him to come back. Who’d have thought that one not so innocent question would send him running? Know you should let it go, but that almost panicked look on his face is just so sweet. Like the big guy himself. And you’d been straight with him, if he’d been a human guy and treated you like he does, you’d have rode him until you’re both too exhausted to crawl out of bed.

• One more thing he can’t have. Accepting that, he lets himself back inside his quarters and finds you sitting on his berth eating that crunchy, dry food out of a box. “So you got some freaky alien stuff going on like double dicks or crotch tentacles?” Gritting his denta behind his mask as you just grin up at him, he vents tiredly.

• He almost looks like he’s in pain as he just straight up ignores the question. Apparently you’ve reached the limit of how much bullshit he’s willing to put up with. Silent, he begins moving the uneaten food and his half empty energon cube off the berth and sits beside you, elbows on his knees and face in his hands. Making you feel guilty about screwing with him. Especially since, realistically him abducting you probably saved your life given the path you were on. And you owe him more than you can ever hope to repay.

• “You know,” you say and he hears your little feet padding on the berth. Peeking at you, he watches you slowly spin. Dancing again and he wonders why you do that, your expression no longer teasing, but oddly empty. “The club I danced for, didn’t pay a lot. Sometimes if the customer looked like he had money, we’d have a private party.” Arms over your head, you turn so your back is to him. “And I always told myself it didn’t matter. That I didn’t care, because every dollar got me a little closer to getting the hell out of there.” There’s something under the resignation in your voice, something broken that makes his spark ache. Wishing he’d found you just a bit sooner, before life had scarred you.

• Wrapping your arms around yourself, you wish you could just shut up. Because telling him this, how dirty you really are? He’s not going to look at you the same way if you don’t stop. Won’t treat you the same way. And part of you knows that everything that’s wrong with your life is wholly your fault. Stubbornly doubling down again and again until there was no digging yourself out. You hear him shift behind you, a metallic rasp. Leaving again? Done with you?

• There’s an unsettling pull as he mass shifts, of willing himself smaller and burning so much energy all at once. And when he’d done, you’re still so much smaller than he is. Just this fragile little thing that still seems so unreal to him as he reaches out and pulls you back into him. Hearing your startled inhale as he catches your wrists in a big hand, unsettled that he can loop the servos of one hand so easily around both your little wrists. “You think I’m proud of every single thing I’ve done? That I haven’t made mistakes?” He asks and feels you shiver.

• Head craning to look over your shoulder and up at him, for once you can’t say anything at all. No smart ass comment or teasing. It hadn’t even occurred to you that he could do something like this. And he’s warm against your back, suddenly aware of him in a way you’d never been before. Those big hands achingly gentle on you. Has anyone ever touched you like that? Gently? It’s too much. Too real, sending you into a panic. “Please tell me it’s not crotch tentacles,” you blurt, hearing him make a noise suspiciously between a groan and a laugh as his other arm curls around you. Holding you closer.

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