#worst!logan x f!reader
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'messy' 18+
oneshot (request) - logan learns that you can squirt, he indulges in that information (1.8k words) pairing - logan howlett (xmen) x f!reader tags - established relationship, fingering, petnames: babygirl, baby, good girl, praising, kind of overstimulation, squirting, lots of squirting, a little rough, he talks reader through it, wet mentions, reader orgasm, dirty talk, fingers in mouth, logan makes reader taste themselves.
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you're splayed out on his lap on the sofa just how he likes you to be, nestled on top of his plush, firm thighs. your knees are bent with your ankles resting over either side of his legs, your back flush with his warm chest, your whole body exposed, open, for him.
logan's thick, calloused fingers lazily stroke your clit, earning soft mewls from your lips as your head tilts back over his shoulder. his other hand is ensuring his middle finger pumps in and out of you at a slow pace, your body craving those broad digits stretching your tight walls.
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you're moaning, gripping his arm for dear life as you squirm in his lap, rolling your hips instinctively. it was beautiful, the way he could make you sing for him, the way he could make your body move for him with just a few simple strokes, almost like a puppet, pulling your strings. he would never consider himself your 'master', but god, you'd let him control you whenever he liked.
he smirks, nuzzling his fuzzy beard into the side of your cheek, his lips finding their place at your ear, "that feel good, baby girl?" logan asks, his voice a deep purr. he already knows the answer.
you gasp at his low-toned voice, gruff like gravel but sweet like honey, "yes. . ."
"mh, that's what i thought. . . think you can take a little more though." he huffs, slipping another finger inside.
your walls clench around the sudden new presence and you moan, loudly, craving the feeling of being filled by him in whatever capacity he's willing to give.
"that's it," he coos, picking up the pace, "good girl, gooood girl. . ." logan loves how easily he can slip inside of you, how he'd always find you dripping, cunt aching, core throbbing for him. his sensitive ears perk up at the sweet sounds of your wet pussy taking his fingers in, the wet schlick sounds filling the room.
your cheeks flush, looking down at the way his fingers are making light work of you, your shirt hiked up to expose your breasts. with the pace increasing, and the way he's so sweetly purring filthy words into your ear. . . you feel a sensation start to build.
it's. . . new, almost uncomfortable but not quite. not the same as an orgasm but almost. it pools low in your belly, just a little out of reach.
but his fingers pick up again, slamming deep inside of you, curling just enough. his fingers circling your clit remain slow in contrast, creating a dizzying combination of sensations that have you clenching around him and calling out his name over and over in some desperate plea. desperation for him to continue, for the building feeling, for him, full stop.
the feeling returns. fuck, it almost feels like you need to piss. your cheeks flush, eyes rolling back as you fight back the feeling, but he's rubbing you and touching you and fucking you too good for you to hold anything back.
"logan," you gasp, arching your back, "l-logan wait-"
but it's too late, before he even has the chance to slow down, you squirt. your juices coat his hands, his fingers, dripping down along his arm and onto the sofa below earning a gasp from both of you.
his eyes widen, stopping his movements immediately causing you to whine at the sudden lack of friction.
then there's silence, save for the lewd wet dripping from the sofa onto the hardwood floor.
your head is reeling, did. . . did you just squirt? fuck, you'd never done that before. heart pounding, you swallow hard, instinctively wanting to apologise for the mess, "shit, sorry i-"
"holy fuck. . ." he whispers shakily before you even have the chance to finish your sentence, "where were you hidin' that from me?" you can hear the smirk in his voice clear as day as he talks into your ear.
"what?" you whisper.
he smirks, kissing your ear, "you didn't tell me you could make cute little messes like that, baby."
"i didn't know i could. . ." you admit, biting your lip as you feel the cool air of the room brush against your dripping sensitive core.
logan's eyes widen, the implication of your words nestling deep in his brain, and groin. he was the first ever to make you squirt, the first to make you feel so good that you couldn't help but make a mess for him. pride swells in his chest, manifesting in a low rumbling smug chuckle at the back of his throat.
". . .think you could make another mess for me?" he hums, his fingers on your clit slowly resuming their movements.
you whimper, the new sensation you experienced was foreign but surprisingly welcomed. you had no idea it felt that good, that you could ever do that. but logan has a way of coaxing everything out of you, cock and fingers playing you like an instrument he's mastered.
"don't know. . ." you mumble, suddenly feeling skittish.
it's then that his fingers start fucking you again, gliding in and out easily, your fluttering hole welcoming the movement. "you can, i know you can." he encourages, nibbling at your ear, "you'll be a good girl, you'll make another mess for me, won't you?"
fuck, his words. his fucking words. every single time they had you acting crazy, letting out sounds you didn't know you could make. and he drinks them in, drinks up all those sweet little sounds from that pretty little mouth of yours that he loves so much.
you simply nod, feeling his digits pumping rougher, curling to find that sweet sweet spot once more. you're not sure if you can even do it again, but logan seems pretty fucking set on making him gush for you at least once more.
he scissors his fingers slightly, stretching you, the motion making you whine with pleasure. but when he pushes in a third finger? that's when you really start screaming for him.
"that's more like it, huh?" he grins, breathing deeply through his nose from how hard he's working you, "just needed a bit more, cus' i know you like it thick baby, don't you? like it thick like my cock?"
you want to gasp, to react to his words, but your eyes are rolling back again, mouth stuck open in an 'o' shape as you feel that sensation build once more. your body is tensing, thighs clenching, back arching, eyes squeezing shut. subconsciously you hold your breath as if that'll help. he's got you right where he wants you, right where he knows you want to be.
seconds later you're gushing, more this time - it lands on the hardwood below with a crude splash and coats his hands nicely. logan laughs, a deep dirty laugh as you writhe. he gives a gentle slap to your clit, then a firmer one, causing more to spill from you along with some squeaks.
"there we go, good girl, what a good girl. . ." you can hear the smirk in his voice, the wide grin he's wearing, the smugness lacing every word that leaves his lips, "feels good to make a mess for me, doesn't it?"
you're breathless, panting, overwhelmed in the best way. and then he speaks again.
". . . i think you can handle one more." logan purrs, movements suddenly fast and hard. his fingers fuck deep into you, curling to hit your g-spot with each calculated thrust. the fingers on your clit speed up, rubbing in practiced circles sending sparks of electricity throughout your body.
you want it too, you'd give it to him over and over again, create messes all night long if your body let you.
god you'd do anything for him, especially in that moment, and how could you not? the way his fingers play with you, toy with you, slide into you. . .
"d-don't know if i can!" you admit, huffing, trying to get more air.
but he shakes his head, "yes you can." is all he says, firmly.
and he's right. moments later you feel it pooling in your belly once more, the accompanying orgasm approaching that threatens to throw you overboard. you're lost in a sea of sensations, stars in your vision, his voice in your ear the only anchor you have to reality. you let it guide you, until you're drenching his fingers and jeans once more, voice ringing out within his bedroom as his voice coaxes and praises you softly.
his fingers on your clit come together to slap down against you, each smack against your sensitive bundle of nerves causing more to spray. you're making such a big mess, his jeans are damp. he doesn't care. this is what he wants, and fuck, if you don't feel the best you've ever felt in your entire life. . .
he keeps going, his fingers steadily pumping into you roughly, desperate to get every last drop as he feels you clamp down around his fingers. you're moaning, gasping, gripping onto his arm for dear life as you ride out your orgasm. it's too much, but it's also perfect. logan watches on in deep satisfaction as you writhe on his lap, his bulge pressing against you above him, cock twitching and rock hard just from touching you.
as your body relaxes, so do his movements, slowing down. he glides his fingers in a few times, enjoying the slick sounds they make before pulling them from your still-fluttering hole. he lazily drifts his damp digits along your tummy, leaving a trail of wetness up to your chest until it finds your mouth.
you part your lips gladly, turning your head to look up at him through hooded lids as you take his fingers in your mouth. diligently, your tongue laps at his fingers, reeling at the taste of yourself on him, dripping from him.
"good girl, you're always so fuckin' good for me. . ." he smiles, kissing your forehead as he watches you, his free hand resting on your tummy. you enjoy the feeling of his large palm against you, making you feel comforted whilst also grounding you after that whirlwind of release.
you pull his fingers from your mouth with a wet pop, instead kissing along his fingers and down across the sensitive skin of his knuckles. a silent thank you, for making you feel so good.
logan watches keenly, growling quietly at the stirring in his groin. his eyes flash with something. you'd call it mischief.
your eyes flit up to his, knowing what he's thinking before he's even said it.
"wonder what else you can do. . ." he smirks, "keeping any other secrets from me?" logan asks as he rolls his hips against you, prompting you to feel how hard he is for you and you exhale, relaxing back against him.
it was funny, how he could always push you right to the edge when you think you're spent.
and yet have you craving more. . .
you grin, biting your lip, "wanna find out?"
#my writing#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x f!reader#wolverine smut#logan howlett x you#logan howlett smut#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#james howlett#deadpool 3#deadpool movie#james logan howlett#x men#xmen fanfiction#x men movies#marvel x reader#marvel#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#marvel comics#marvel mcu#hugh jackman#worst wolverine
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âepiphanyâ | 21k
worst!logan howlett x f!reader
SUMMARY: Superheroes and mutants werenât enough. Noâthe universe had to throw in soulmates who share scars. Fantastic, right? Except yours had vanished, only to mysteriously reappear with the arrival of a new face: the âWorstâ Logan Howlett, fresh from another earth.
OR What happens when a hopeless romantic crosses paths with the ultimate soulmate skeptic?
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni smut 18+ strangers to lovers. drinking. cursing. slow burn. angst. pining. mentions of alcohol. fluff. reflecting on the art of writing/poems/books. dual POV. takes place after the events of âdeadpool & wolverineâ. TW: multiple descriptions of scars. worst/variant!logan. implied age gap (readerâs in her late 20s). theyâre both touch starved. wadeâs everyoneâs friend. miscommunication/misunderstandings. oral sex (f and m receiving). fingering, grinding. some slight hair pulling. unprotected p in v, creampie. sex with feelings.
A/N: HOPELESS ROMANTICS RISE! here we go again with another long ass fic. this is a soulmates AU in which you get your soulmateâs scars. if you feel triggered by this topic, please refrain from reading. i had a lot of fun writing this even though it took me a while to get it done. thanks to @lubdubology for being my beta and allowing me to share my work with you. and also thanks to @brushworth for giving me the chance to write this. having said this, enjoy the story! iâd love to know your thoughts on it <3
Love giveth and love taketh away.
To this day, itâs still hard for you to wrap your head around the fact that love is what humans both strive and die for.
If it werenât for love, you wouldnât be here. No one would, actually. Human beings are the result of billions of people who loved each other just enoughâor at least long enough to bring life into the world.
But isnât it in the name of love that people act in bad faith? Why would something so pure be used in vain?
You donât get it, but as the years go by, you slowly come to terms with the idea that perhaps you never will. Not because there isnât a reason, but because youâre in love with the idea of love.
How could you not be? Itâs on the streets, on the bus, at work. Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is. Love is dressed up in an expensive silk robe, a ribbon tied neatly on top of it. You reach closer, trying to unravel it, though it's pointless. The moment love sees youâtruly sees your longing for itâit flees, and you struggle to keep up.
Love runs faster than anyone, hiding within the bushes, counting the seconds until its next appearance.
It had always been a relentless race, your only worry being to catch it before time ran out. But with each day that passed, the finish line only stretched further and further away. Now, they all blur together, to the point where you live and breathe on autopilot.Â
In a Jane Austen novel, youâd be considered a lone woman. That character whoâs nice, and kind, and loved by some, but not in the way she yearns for. Every time sheâs mentioned, you go âOh, the poor girl,â until the slow realization dawns.
In reality, sheâs you, and itâs you who you feel sorry for, not a fictional character. You.
All in all, love giveth. And love also taketh away.Â
Love maketh you miserable.
Soulmatesâa nine-letter word that holds so much meaning.
Itâs one of those words that you learn early in your life, one you hear at home or on the TV. Your parents never fail to mention it if given the chance. The first time youâre introduced to the topic is at school when you're older, a bit more self-conscious, and no longer preoccupied with picking your nose.
âEverybody has a soulmate. And no,â your teacher had added after a pause, already anticipating the inevitable questions from any curious 10-year-old, âthere isnât such a thing as not having one. We all do. You just have to search for them.â
Back then, that had been your favorite gameâalways keeping an eye open, scanning the crowd more than once in new places. You knew for sure that more than one person probably thought youâd strained your neck from all the times you glanced over your shoulder.
It must be pretty obvious now, the fact that youâreâwell, alone. Saying âwithout a companionâ sounds quite outdated. They canât see through you, but something in the way you walk or speak must give it away.Â
Or is it the fact that you always ask for a table for one?
âAre you expecting someone else?â A waitress approaches you, her tone gentle as she makes sure youâre on your own. A small notebook dangles from her slender fingers, and your eyes catch the name stitched onto her apron: Emily.
The response you give her is on the verge of sounding automatic, robotic even, like one of those prerecorded messages busy people leave on their phones. âNo. Just me.â
She nods, and you feel the sympathy in her gaze. Youâve mastered the art of recognizing that lookâthe one hovering between concern and pity.
Of course, people rarely voice it, but theyâll never know their eyes sometimes say more than they think.
As she jots down your order, youâre met with the ring on her left hand. Very pretty, very shiny. Very expensive as well. Your attention must linger on it a little too long, because she catches you staring, making you feel exposed.
Emilyâyou decide to call her that way from now on, because once you know her name, it feels odd to address her as the waitressâoffers you a shy smile.
âIâm getting married next month,â she blurts out, happiness radiating from her pores. Her eyes glint like two lanterns in a starless night. She also looks younger than you, and the abrupt silence forces you to pinch your wrist, a reminder of the fact that this is a conversation, and not just something you're overhearing.
âCongratulations,â you manage to reply, returning the smile. If she saw how your expression faltered the second she walked away, you wonder if sheâd still think you were so amiable.
Sometimes, your façade slipsâyou canât help it. Thatâs what the âhopelessâ in âhopeless romanticâ stands for.
Some minutes later, she comes back with your coffee, and you catch another glimpse of the ring as it twinkles in front of you. Envy doesnât suit you, so you shift your focus.
Taking out your laptop, you scroll through the latest headlines. This is your attempt at acting more like an adult and less like a girl in her mid-twenties who has no clue what sheâs doing.
One article stands out from the rest: Hollywood Actress Divorces Loving Husband of 25 Years to Pursue Presumed Soulmate. âI saw his scars and knew he was the one.â
Interesting. You canât help but feel sorry for the displaced husband, though.
âGood for you,â you mutter under your breath, clicking the link to read more. Thereâs a picture of the actress and her new boyfriend that makes you stop dead in your tracks: theyâre smiling at each other, their faces close, noses almost touching, while they show off their matching scarsâthe unmistakable sign that theyâre, in fact, soulmates.
Soulmates, superheroes, mutants. It all sounds like a whole lot, doesnât it? Overwhelming, to say the least. One thingâs for sureâyouâll never get bored in this world.
But, hey! Donât forget that there are multiple universes out there. Maybe in one of them, youâre not this pathetic.
Why are you being so hard on yourself? Thatâs not even the point. Shaking your head, you keep glancing at their scarsâtheyâre identical, perfect mirrors of one another. The kind of scars that only two destined souls share.
Their happiness is evident, tangible. You can feel it by just eyeing the image. Itâs a bitter sensation that metamorphoses into a warmth, which heavily spreads through your chest, filling up every empty space it finds.Â
To say you understand that feeling would be a downright lie. And you may be many things, but a pathological liar is not one of them.
As if on cue, you duck your head, rolling up the sleeves of your jacket. You do the same with your shirt, foolishly hoping to find something other than smooth, unmarked skin.
No scars. No marks. No sign of a soulmate, of a lover. In the world you inhabitâthis universe full of the most inexplicable thingsâyouâre alone.Â
Without a second thought, you pack your things, shoving them rapidly into your bag. The cafe feels too little and too large all at once, the walls closing on you.
The rest of the customers are looking at you. Fuck, they already noticed itâyou canât escape it.
Have they? Do you think they see you like you see yourself? The lone woman who writes poems for an addressee who will never read them?
In silence, you hand Emily the money for your coffee. You fear that if you open your mouth, a cry will come out, and thatâs the last thing you need today. She gives you that look againâpity laced with sorrow, the one you despise. It burns.
At that moment, a man walks in, passing right by you. You see his face, his green eyes, and the way his lips curl into a grin as he greets Emily.
The scar on her forehead, which you'd missed before, mirrors the one on his.
They are soulmates.Â
Itâs on the streets, on the bus, at work. Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is.
She wishes you a nice morning as you leave the cafe. Little does she know youâll spend the rest of the day locked in your apartment, mourning someone you never even met.
Until the day you lost them, you wore your scars with pride.
They were scattered across your stomach, back, chest, and even your legs and arms. Some were shallow, others deep. It never occurred to youâthe thought that they belonged in the shadows, hidden.
Everyone has them, you thought as you stood in front of the mirror, running your fingers along their jagged paths. I just seem to have more than most people.
Over the years, you might have changed your hairstyle or the way you dressed, but your scars never didâtheyâd always been there, and they were yours.
Partly yours, of course, since you knew they belonged to your soulmate as well.
The older you grew, the more you realized having a good memory was both a gift and a curse. You still remembered that moment so vividlyâwhen you found out that somebody out there was meant for you and only you.
A point of no return, thatâs what itâd been. From that day on, not a single one went by without you imagining the first encounter with your Prince Charming.Â
In the meantime, you dated. A few boyfriends came and went during and after high school, mostly as practice for the real thing, youâd told yourself.
God, you were determined to know everything. To be the best girlfriend ever, so that when you finally met him, heâd be over the moon.
At the age of seventeen, it sounded like a brilliant plan.
You never knew how, but your life became that meantime. All your friends began to find their soulmates: in the supermarket, while traveling, at the goddamn doctorâs office.
Everybody was fulfilling the purpose youâd been taught humans were made forâeveryone but you.
The scars multiplied, yet he was nowhere to be seen, remaining out of reach. Your soulmateâs whereabouts were a mystery. What the hell does he do in his free time? was something you used to often ponder. Is he suffering? Does he need help?
âBe patient, give it some time. The less you seek, the more youâll find,â your mother would say, trying to sound encouraging. Although she was trying to do her best, that phrase alone had the power to make you go nuts.
Be patient? Waiting was all youâd been doing. What was so wrong with you that he seemed to be hiding from you? You didnât want to wait any longer, noâyou wanted to find him. If it meant traveling to Italy like your cousin had to meet her husband, then so fucking be it.
Many nights, sleep eluded you. Lying wide awake, staring at the ceiling, youâd imagine what life with him would be like. What he would look like. You were certain that no matter his appearance, youâd think he was beautiful.
Wasnât that the whole point of soulmatesâthat the bond you two shared transcended physical attraction?
Nevertheless, you secretly wished heâd have brown hair. He didnât need to know, but you had a weakness for brunettes.
On the night of your twenty-second birthday, you were getting ready for the big event when every trace of your scars disappeared.
The bathroom mirror was fogged from the showerâs stream, and as you wiped it clean with the palm of your hand, the image you saw reflected on the glass made your stomach do a flip.
There were no scars. No marks. Nothing. At first, you thought your eyes were playing tricks on youâit couldnât be. Scars didnât just vanish. It was impossible.
But as you lowered your gaze, tracing your limbs again and again, the truth hit you. The marks you knew by heart, the ones that reminded you, Heâs out there, somewhere, were gone.
You felt it deep in your chest, too. Every sound seemed louder and clearer: the blood rushing through your veins, each shaky breath you took. Where are they? Your fingers dug into your flesh, intending to ground yourself.
Is he⊠dead? It was the only reasonable explanation, the rule youâd known all along. Youâd read it countless times, memorizing the principles about scars.
The scream that tore from your throat brought your mother running upstairs, and she entered the bathroom with a horrified expression on her face.
âWhatâs wrong? Are you hurt?â she asked, but your mind was already far away. Your whole body shuddered in her arms, a sob slipping past your lips as you crumbled to the floor, desperately hoping it was all a nightmare. âIt must be a mistake, honey. Iâm sure heâs okay.â
But heâs not, you wanted to tell her. The words, however, never formedâonly a broken whimper escaped your lips. Isnât that what we were taught? Our scars belong to our soulmates; they bind us to them in a way that simple words canât explain.
It goes deeper than the skin. It delves into our bodies, our minds, reaching into the very essence of who we are. What was once his is also mine, but theyâre gone.
Heâs gone. He must be, because otherwise, how would you explain this void?
When oneâs soulmate passes away, that person will notice the disappearance of their scars. The physical marks that once symbolized their connection fade, leaving no trace. This absence is accompanied by a distinct, unsettling sensationâan awareness of loss that goes beyond the physical, signaling the end of the bond.
A part of you died with him that day.
The first time you exchanged words with Wade Wilson, you thought he was a total dick.
It wasnât as if you didnât know himânot when he was so infamous for that mouth of his. Deadpool: the self-proclaimed superhero with a vocabulary that was 90% profanity, who made cracking jokes while fighting the bad guys look easy.
Super funny? Sure. But not exactly your cup of tea when all you wanted was to crawl into bed and forget the world existed.
He was apparently long retired from superheroing. No one had seen that red, sex-toy-looking suit in ages, which was why you were only mildly surprised as you spotted him hauling boxes into your building on a Tuesday afternoon.
It was late, and you werenât in the mood for small talk. Heâd been there barely a week, yet somehow, heâd already managed to fuck things up.Â
You let out a deep sigh, rubbing the crease between your brows. âLook, Wallyââ
âItâs pronounced Wade,â he corrected you, trying to edge his face further into the gap between the door and its frame, though you didnât let your guard down. âYouâre pretty rude, you know that?â
âIâve been up for twenty-four hours, and I need to sleep,â you groaned, trying to push him away with one hand. Technically, he wasnât even asking for something that complicatedâhe wanted to use your microwave to heat his dinner, since his had decided to stop working out of the blue.
The thing was that youâd had the kind of week that felt like a one-way trip to hell, an important detail he wasnât aware of. âGo ask someone else. I canât do charity tonight.â
âYouâre the only one who answered,â he said, pressing his palms together in a pleading gesture, his lips curling into a heartbreaking pout. âPlease, my lovely neighbor, whose name I donât know. You wouldnât want me to starve to death, would you?
âI thought you couldnât die.â You raised an eyebrow, half-interested.
Wadeâs arms dropped to his sides, his eyes drifting downward. âAnd I thought kindness wasnât extinct, but here we are.â He spun on his heel, acting defeated and dragging his feet like a scolded puppy. âCanât believe this is what the worldâs come to. Iâm sure the Bible says something about treating others how youâd want to be treated.â
Why. Just⊠why? Some cosmic, divine force from beyond might have been testing you that night.
âWait,â you croaked just as he was about to step into his apartmentâwhich was literally three meters from yours. His face lit up, expecting you to continue, and you moved aside slightly, signaling him in. âFive minutes and youâre out, okay? I really need to get some rest.â
The rest was history. Wade was just standing there, mesmerized by your microwave as if heâd never seen one before.
You could only hear the faint buzzing sound of the gadget, punctuated by the rhythmic drumming of his fingers on the counter. He was humming a tune while shaking his head to the beat.
You tried to focus, replaying the guided meditation you sometimes followed to sleep in your mind.
Allow yourself to feel the stillness of this moment. Notice your breath slowing as your body begins to calm. Be the observer of your breath, flowing in and out naturally, as your lungsâ
Yeah, it wasnât working.
âPlease, stop it,â you eventually told Wade, whose gaze shifted from the microwave to you, brows furrowed.
âAnd whyâs that?â
âThey say itâs bad for your eyes,â you explained, recalling a half-forgotten news report youâd heard on the TV. Whether it was a myth or not, youâd never know. âI believe itâs because of the radiation exposure.â
Leaning back on the counter, he crossed his arms over his chest. âAt this point, I think Iâm safe. You, on the other hand⊠maybe not so much,â he nearly whispered that last part, and your desire to strangle him grew stronger.
Save me, mindfulness, you thought to yourself.
He jerked his thumb toward the pile of papers and books you had on your kitchen table. âSo, youâre a writer?âÂ
âEditor, in reality,â you snapped, your eyelids twitching as you watched him leaf through your stuff. âWade, donât touch my things.â
âSorry, canât help myself. Iâm very curious.â Flashing you a quick grin, he opened your notebook, squinting his eyes as he went through the pages. âBut you write too, huh? Iâm discovering plenty of material here.â
The bastard. âGive. It. Back,â you snarled, lunging at him and trying to snatch the notebook from his hands, but he was faster, raising it out of reach. âI hope your food explodes in that microwave, asshole.â
âOh, right. I forgot about it,â he snorted, tossing the notebook onto the couch and retrieving his dinner instead. You stared at him in disbelief, opening your mouth to scold him, but nothing came out. Then, there he was, standing in front of you with his plate and a fork.
Wait. Was that your fork?
âItâs hot, Iâll give you that.â He blew on his food to cool it down, and as he glanced up, he was met with your murderous glare. âWhoa. Want some? You couldâve just asked me. No need to get so angry.â
Calling it a desire to kill him wouldâve been an understatement. And the worst part? He couldnât die. âYouâve got what you needed. Now, can you leave?â
âHow longâs it been since you talked to another human being?â
You blinked, feeling the sudden urge to look around, half expecting a hidden camera. âWhy do you always answer with another question?â
âAll Iâm saying is Iâve been meaning to talk to you for days now, but youâre practically living the hermit life,â he said between bites of chicken, excusing himself briefly to chew. âThat robe youâre wearing? Itâs had the same stain on it since I moved in. Also, your doormatâs buried under a mountain of newspapers, so either you really love trees, or youâve been avoiding any sort of social interaction.â
If he had been wrong, you wouldâve felt much better. But he⊠wasnât, and it sucked.
âI feel like I should be scared,â you mumbled after a long stretch of silence, your eyes going round.
Wade did no more than laugh at your troubled expression. âScared of me? Thatâs cute. Iâm a nice guy, sweet pea. Persistent, sure, but Iâve got a knack for getting under peopleâs skin,â he said, grinning through a mouthful of foodâwhich, for the sake of your sanity, you chose to ignore.
After he had finished eating, he let the fork fall into the sink, the metal striking against the surface with a piercing echo, making you jump. He stretched his arms with a satisfied yawn, and he seemed determined to leave you alone. âWell, Iâve done my good deed for the day.â
âWhat do you mean?â you asked, following his movements as he ambled toward the door. âAre you telling me your microwave does work?â
âOh, youâre a smart one, arenât you?â Wade patted your head, ruffling your hair like you were a puppy who had just learned a new trick. âGood night, peanut.â
From that moment on, the two of you became inseparable. Your personalities clicked in a way youâd never experienced before with any other friend. Wade was loyal to a fault, and he treated you like the little sister he had never had.Â
Most importantly, he didnât pity youâhe saw you for who you were, not just someone marked by a lost soulmate. You never told him how much that meant to you, but deep down, you were grateful.
Which brings you to the present day. Youâve been friends with him for over a year, and heâs taken every chance to introduce you to his âweird but lovableâ (his words, not yours) group of friends.
âCheck your social anxiety at the door, thank you,â heâd tell you every time he hosted a get-together and you were invited.
Somehow, you had managed to bond with themâespecially Althea, his elderly roommate, who occasionally forgets who you are despite living next door.
âRemind me of your name again, sweetie? All this disco dust must be affecting my memory,â sheâd ask, leaning in close so youâd practically have to shout it into her ear. Then sheâd nod, smirking knowingly. âAh, yes. I thought so. Just making sure.â
Sheâs quite the character. A real sweetheart if you leave aside the number of times sheâs offered you more types of drugs than you knew existed.
Tonight, youâre throwing Wade a surprise birthday party. Among all the party tasks, youâve handled the decorations and the cake. The roomâs a riot of color, with balloons floating lazily from the ceiling and a cascade of streamers draping over the furniture.
Guests start arriving, greeting you warmly, a feeling you once thought impossible. Theyâre Wadeâs friends, sure, but on some level, you like to think theyâre your friends now too: Vanessa, Dopinder, Buck, Shatterstar, Colossus, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, and Yukio.
As you hear footsteps approaching the door, Wadeâs voice filters through the hallway. Panicking, you whirl around to the group. âHeâs here! Everyone shut up!â you whisper urgently, turning off the lights and pressing your back flat against the wall next to the door.
Seconds later, the sound of keys jingling fills the air as both Wade and Peter step into the apartment.
You flip the lights back on just as Dopinder pops his much-anticipated party popper. âSurprise!â you all scream in unison, and Wadeâs face splits into a grin, unsure of whom to hug first.
âYou guys are lucky Iâm not armed,â he quips, slinging an arm around Dopinderâs shoulders. âSix years ago, youâd all be dead!â
And you giggle, because⊠well, what else are you supposed to do?
As you expected, the night unfolds smoothly. Youâre having fun, engaging in conversations despite yesterdayâs emotional meltdown at the cafe. Itâll be okayâit always is. The food is amazing, the company even better. You remind yourself that romantic love isnât the only kind that mattersâthatâs what friends are for, after all, to teach you that lesson.
The low hum of chatter fills the air, punctuated by bursts of laughter and the clinking of glasses, creating a lively symphony that wraps around you like a warm blanket. Yukio calls your name, waving her head in front of your eyes, trying to snap you out of your thoughts. âEverything okay?â she wonders, concern flickering in her voice.
âYeah, Iâm fine,â you reply, tightening your grip on your beer bottle. âJust thinking, thatâs all.â
You all gather around the cake when Wadeâs about to blow the candles. You know heâs preparing himself for a speech. âAnother year of spinning around the moon, huh?â
âSun, you dumbass,â Al corrects him, and you have to bite your lip to keep your laughter to yourself.
âOkay, flat-earther,â Wade shoots back, giving her a playful side-eye. âAnyway, where was I? Oh, rightâI canât thank you all enough for being here. These past few years have been... well, rough on me, to say the least,â he says, glancing down at the cake with a small, crooked smile. âBut Iâm happy now. Weâve got each otherâs back, like a team!â
âLike The Avengers, you mean?â Dopinder pipes up, eyes sparkling with excitement. Thereâs a moment of silence in which you swear youâd be able to hear a hairpin drop.
Itâs still a sensitive topic.
âNext time, give me a trigger warning before you mention them,â Wade mutters in a hushed tone, and Dopinder shrinks sheepishly. âI guess what I wanted to tell you wasâŠâ he trails off, his palm covering the place where his heart is, âthat I'm glad youâre all here. Being surrounded by the people I love most is the best birthday gift ever.â
His words stir something inside you. Vanessa gently nudges his arm, smiling up at him. âWhy donât you make your wish?â
Wade dramatically drops to his knees in front of the cake, eyes fluttering shut before blowing out the candles, whistles and cheers erupting all around.
Just then, you hear the unmistakable sound of the doorbell ringing through the air. You exchange a curious glance with Wade, raising your eyebrows. âThatâs weird. Want me to get it?â
âNah, I got it,â he says, excusing himself to answer the door. He slips outside, shutting it behind him, and everything returns to normal. For a while, you assume heâs chatting with someone who dropped by to say hiâbut that doesnât really make sense.
âDonât you think itâs weird that heâs been out there so long?â Vanessa inquires, her worry starting to creep in.
âIâll go check on him,â you tell her, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze before heading to the door.
But when you open it, thereâs no Wade in sight. Just⊠his toupeeâor âhair systemâ as he insists on calling it, lying on the floor.
Kneeling down, you gingerly pick it up, a strange sensation settling in your chest.
Where the hell did he go?
After his existence went downhill, Logan turned to prayer.
Completely out of character, right? He thought so too. The number of times he'd stepped foot inside a church could be counted on one hand, so why would a man like him resort to religion?
In the past, he had been told he was part of Godâs plan, but somewhere along the way, he felt like he had become Godâs mistake.
After living a life plagued with loss and constantly in hiding, he wasnât shocked that his self-worth was in the gutter.
Things only spiraled after letting everyone down, especially after that particular day when things took a turn for the worse. He had prayed, asking God to make him forget.
When that didnât work, he just drank harder and smoked more. But not even drowning in alcohol and clouds of nicotine could put an end to his strugglesâhe was condemned to suffer.
In spite of everyoneâs wishes, heâs still going strong, stuck with no defined purpose. Itâs almost impossible not to fall into a routine that seeks to numb him, to put him under anesthesiaâwaking up after passing out who-knows-where, finding the nearest bar, sinking into whiskey and the haze of ashtrays.
Then he does it all over again, a never-ending cycle. His self-destructive habits donât lead him to oblivion; instead, they intensify every sensation, making each memory and emotion painfully vivid.Â
Day after day, he convinces himself heâs got it under control. Logan may be tough as fuck, and he may heal faster than anyone else, but his pride is in pieces.
No amount of strength or supernatural abilities can stop the decay he feels inside, the slow rot creeping deeper within him the longer he remains trapped in this life.
He slams the empty glass onto the counter with a heavy thud, tapping two fingers against it. âAgain,â he murmurs, his voice low and rough.
The bartender looks at him like he's the reincarnation of all things vile. âI told youâyouâre not welcome here. Youâre not welcome anywhere. Now get the fuck out of my bar.â
Oh, yes. Music to his ears. If he had a nickel for every time he heard that, heâd be rich. âJust give me one more drink and then Iâll leave.â
âThatâs not how it works,â the bartender replies, and Logan knows heâs screwed. Another public establishment heâs been banned fromâfucking perfect.
Will there ever be a day where heâs not treated like garbage?
âIt does now,â an unknown voice joins the conversation, and Logan glances to his side, arching a brow. The masked man doesnât let his stare falter. âLeave the bottle.â
âDo I know you, bub?âÂ
âYou donât, but I know you.â
This serves as evidence of how pliant heâs become. Years ago, he wouldâve already wiped the floor with this guy. They didnât call him Logan âshort fuseâ Howlett for nothing. But now? He just canât bring himself to do it.
âEverybody does. Iâm theââ
Here it comes, the reminder of his personal calvary.
ââWolverine.â Once he finishes the sentence, his words taste bitter. Perhaps itâs the venom on his tongue, or maybe itâs just the alcohol from yesterday kicking him again. Either way, both hit hard.
âYes, you are,â the stranger says, continuing to stare at him, as if Loganâs worth the effort. âAnd Iâm going to need you to come with me. Right now.â
Logan holds his breath. The worst part of it all is that his dayâs just getting started. He has no clue who this guy is or why heâs claiming to need him.
But heâs got the wrong manâLogan doesnât know him, and he sure as hell doesnât have anything good to offer.
Or so he believed five minutes ago. Life seems to have its own way of surprising him.
Knowing heâll regret it later, he closes his fingers around the whiskey bottle, chugging the liquor until darkness takes over his senses.
Nighty-night, Logan.
I'm aware that you're not mine, and nor will you ever be.
Iâve spent sleepless nights trying to figure out
where this need to call you mine stems from.Â
You're like an antique, a rare piece displayed
in a crowded bazaar, drawing curious glances.
Iâm aware that you're not mine
because I haven't bought you yet;
I hold no claim over you,
nor can I control who touches you and who doesn't.
I want you to be mine,
but no amount of money would buy your soul.
You're beyond reachâsomeone has already marked you.
Iâm aware that youâre not mine,Â
and I guess maybe thatâs how life is meant to be.
âBullshit,â you mutter softly into the quiet of your apartment, where the only sound is the echo of your own voice.
Chewing the end of your pen, your eyes narrow as they skim over the poem youâd written over a month ago.
Since then, youâve been working on refining the details, but something is missingâthat you can feel. The flow is awkward, the choice of words stiff. Itâs like a puzzle that doesnât quite fit together.Â
You take a long sip from your coffee, tucking both knees up onto the chair you're sitting in. 7:30 a.m., and already, your mind is spinning, diving headfirst into a poem when countless other things are demanding your attentionâlike, a hundred things, really.
Right now, cracking this piece feels more important than any other task on your list.
Who do you write to? That part is easyâyour soulmate. That deceased, probably buried, long-gone soulmate of yours.
It shouldnât be funny, but thereâs an absurdity to it.
Without warning, a memory slips into your thoughtsâone girl you used to work with once advising you to change the subject of your writing.
âYou should go for some self-love crap. People usually eat that up,â she said, not even bothering to look up from her nails, red polish smeared over the edges.
Her fingers were a mess, coated in that fiery hue, but she didnât seem to care as she tapped your notebook with her lacquered index finger. âThis is repetitive. Keep writing about the same thing, and people will get bored of you.â
âI havenât published them yet,â you answered, your voice coming out more high-pitched than usual, betraying the doubt you intended to suppress. Her blue eyes flicked up, studying your face as you slid the now red-stained notebook back into your bag, away from her careless, messy fingers. âI thought⊠I thought we were supposed to write about what we feel passionate about.â
That managed to catch her attention. Passionate. She let out a laughâsharp and cold, like something straight out of a villainâs script in a childrenâs movie. It grated against your ears.
âSweetie, you call that passionate?â She waved her hand dismissively, standing up from the table.
Taller, older, and more secureâjust the fact that she gave you her time shouldâve made you feel grateful. âNot to be a bitch, but what you showed me is kind of depressing.âÂ
Kind of depressing. From that moment on, you kind of hated her. Small victories, thoughâthe agency fired her a year later. You like to think you kind of won that battle.
Still, she mightâve been right about one thing: your writing does fall into patterns. Itâs predictable, to say the leastâthe rhythm, the themes. Even the metaphors you include can be found in several of your poems.
Are you⊠lazy? Has someone revealed the way to break out of it? If there is, you figure you're fine without it.
You donât want to write the kind of articles sheâd churn out about the latest trends or the five best positions to get pregnant faster. Nor do you want to pick apart celebrities' lives for a flashy headline.
What you do want is to write about love. Real love. Even if you are not the most qualified person to do it. Even if nobody wants to read the words from someone who has never experienced it in the flesh.
And youâll get thereâhow? Youâre still figuring that out.
As long as you live and breathe, love will remain in your thoughts, haunting youâespecially with your muse being the fleeting dream of a soulmate you never got to meet in the first place.
But itâs time to start your dayâthe real one. The one where you have to step outside the safety of your four walls and deal with reality.
The to-do list assembles in your mind: groceries, that book youâve been meaning to pick up, emails you need to answer.
You let your mind take over, guiding you through the motions without a second thought. As you head back to your room, you get rid of the comfortable robe you love so much.
Next, your shirt comes off, tossed carelessly onto the bed. Just as you're about to step out of your pajama pants, you notice them.
The scars.
Theyâre not the same, not the faded lines etched into your skin that you could see every night behind your eyelids. New marks glow against your flesh, each one a map of something you donât yet understand, standing out like new brushstrokes on an old canvas.
You canât help but freeze, your breath faltering for a moment, and you nearly trip over yourself. Kicking your pants to the side, you stare down at your hips, thighs, the hollow of your ribcage.Â
Tentatively, you press your fingers into the lines, expecting them to fade, to disappear under your touch like some peculiar illusion.
But they donât. They remain. You can feel the raised edges, the subtle roughness, the heat beneath your touch.
These scars are different from the ones you had before. Under no circumstances are they the faint memories you once carried. Noâthese are fresh and vibrant. Marks that shouldnât exist, the stories theyâve witnessed unfamiliar to you.
Within seconds, youâre sobbing, and you blink through the wetness clouding your vision, wiping your tears of disbelief (and maybe hope?) away with the back of your hand.
Nothing changes. Theyâre still there.
You've never heard of scars returning like this. It goes against everything in the manual on your shelf. Scars vanish when a soulmate dies, but they donât come back. Not like this. And they certainly donât change.Â
Barely able to stand without stumbling, you scramble to your phone. The first person you call is your mom, your fingers shaking as you press the buttons. She screams into the phone, and all you can do is laugh through the tears.
What doesnât sit right with her is the change in the scars. She mentions something about reaching out to a specialist, insisting that your case is rareâone in a million.
Almost immediately, you think of Wade, knowing heâd want to hear this. God, heâd be ecstatic. Before you even realize it, youâre standing in front of his door, finger hovering over the bell.
Thatâs when the realization hits you: heâs been gone for nearly three days, off doing whatever it is he does.
Ringing the bell, a smile tugs at your lips. News like these are meant to be shared.
âAlthea, itâs me!â you call out, hoping sheâll hear you. You press your forehead against the door, fidgeting with your fingers. âI have something to tell you.â
Logan has had better days. Days that didnât involve escaping The Void, fighting a hundred Wades, or saving an earth that wasnât even his to begin with.
You know, normal daysâof being sneered at while drinking to forget and, fuck, how many hours has he been sober? It feels like an eternity.
When the adrenaline wears off and the heroism fades, heâs back to being just Logan again. If he had a watch, heâd probably tap the glass and fake impatience to Wade, pretending heâs got somewhere else to be.
He should leave. Thatâs his first impulse: to escape before itâs too late, but a question arises in his mind: does he truly want to?
Wade watches as Logan rises to his feet, planning to walk away. Pretty stupid, Logan thinks, considering he knows no one else in this universeâapart from the scarred man heâs become friends with against his will.
âLogan!â Wade yells his name, his voice light but firm enough to halt him in his tracks. Logan turns to face him, greeted by Wadeâs familiar, infuriating smile.
It's a silent invitation to a new beginning.
Nothingâs holding him back, so why not accept it? The odds of being the target of hateful glares are lower here, and thatâs reason enough for Logan to give a small tilt of his head and return to the bench where Wade remains seated.
âWeâre gonna be roommates!â the latter exclaims, a wide grin stretching across his face as they head toward the building. âCan you imagine all the fun weâll have?â
Logan presses his lips into a thin line. âLooking forward to it,â he murmurs, a small glimmer of sarcasm slipping into his tone, although Wade takes his words at face value.
âMe too, roomie. Me too.â
âLetâs not use that word.â
Wade holds the door open for Logan with an exaggerated bow. âWhy not? Itâs the truth. We can even share my bed if thatâsââ
The sound of Loganâs claws succeeds in silencing him. Wade recoils and covers his crotch, no doubt remembering past close calls.
âYou know what? You can have the bed. Iâll take the couch. No problem.â
Was moving in with Wade the worst idea heâs had in a while? Absolutely. The reason? Althea, the elderly woman he lives with, isnât answering the door, and he doesnât have his keys.
Logan covers his eyes with a hand, silently questioning all of his life choices. And itâs only been ten minutes.
âThis doesnât happen often,â Wade reassures him, rubbing his neck.
âHard to believe,â Logan mutters, some unknown muscle in his jaw beginning to ache from how hard heâs gritting his teeth. âYou just leave the house without your fucking keys?â
Wade huffs, jutting out a hip in mock offense. âThose TVA guys didnât exactly send a âWeâre here to ruin your dayâ memo. I was ambushed, okay?â he retorts, keeping a finger glued to the doorbell, its shrill ring gnawing at Loganâs already thin patience. âAl, I swear to God, Iâm replacing your blood pressure pills with laxatives if you donât wake up!â
âHow old is she?â Logan asks, searching for anything to keep him from snapping the other manâs neck. Peaceful thoughts.
âCompared to you, sheâs basically a newborn,â Wade replies, rocking back and forth on his heels. Heâs having the time of his lifeâmeanwhile, Loganâs self-control is reaching its limit.
His claws twitch in his knuckles. Heâs had enough, and with a jerk of his left hand, they gleam as they slide out, ready to break the damn door.Â
But then Wade jumps in front of him.
âWhoa, whoa, whoa. Easy there, buddy! Iâm not letting you turn my door into a strainer.â
âMove,â Logan barks, not an ounce of friendliness in his tone. His stare is flat, unfazed.
âIâd rather not. You canât just go around breaking peopleâs doors, man. Not cool,â Wade blurts quickly, placing both hands on Loganâs chest, pushing him away. âHow about I ask my neighbor, huh? I gave her a spare set of keys for situations like these.â
âI thought you said this didnât happen often.â
âWell, lifeâs full of disappointments.â
Before Logan can answer back, Wade rushes to the door next to his, slamming his fist on it like a madman, his finger hammering the doorbell simultaneously.
The devilâs orchestraâa symphony straight from hell.
Logan grabs Wadeâs wrist before he can knock again, hissing: âHave some manners, will you?âÂ
Wade tries to shake his arm free from Loganâs tight grip. âSheâs in there. I know it,â he replies in the same tone, but now he uses his other hand to ring the doorbell with greater feeling.
After a pause, he stamps his foot on the floor, throwing his head back. âCome on! Is this how you treat me after being away? Shame on you, Missy!â
This neighbor must be very patient, Logan thinks, to keep up with a guy like Wade without often seeing red.
As the door finally swings open, his grip on Wade loosens, and his hand falls limply to his side.
âWhat⊠the fuck?â
The sound of your voiceâsoft, slightly groggy from sleepâpulls his attention away from the door incident. His gaze is fixed entirely on youâyou look as if youâve just rolled out of bed, which makes sense since itâs still early.
Back in The Void, Wade had rambled on about all his friends, you included. Logan recalls how he had described you: a book editor who lived on her own and loved reading. You were youngerâbut then again, who wasnât younger than him?
The picture Wade had shown him, with you standing in the background, hadnât done you justice. He had found you attractive then, but seeing you in person?
Youâre⊠far more than he expected.
More beautiful, for starters.
Fuck. Why is he even thinking about that? He mustâve been staring at you for quite a whileâyou glance at him like a startled lamb, clearly feeling self-conscious under his unwavering stare.
âMay I know,â you start, tightening your robe, âwhy you were banging on my door like that? I thought I was getting robbed for a minute.â You direct your question at Wade, avoiding Loganâs presence, which makes something tighten in his chest.
He finds the way you stifle a yawn endearing, though.
Okay, thatâs enough, he tells his mind. Let it go.
Wade steps in first, dropping his mask on the nearest surface. âHello, my dear. Oh, yes, Iâm fine. Just a few scratches. No, I wasnât partyingâI was kidnapped. Thanks for asking.â
You draw in a long breath, rubbing your eyes to wake up once and for all, and then you proceed to gesture for Logan to enter. Even now, you find it difficult to maintain eye contact with him. âDo youâwould you like to come in?â
Not only are you pretty, but also polite. He nods, muttering a gruff: âYeah, thank you.â
As he walks past you, your shoulders brush briefly, sending an unexpected jolt through him. A tingling sensation on the verge of being electrifying that has him knitting his brows.
His gaze finds yours, searching your expression to see if you felt it too. But you look away, closing the door to go after Wade.
Great. You must think heâs a weirdo.Â
âIâm always up for company, but why so early?â you ask your friend, rummaging through the kitchen cabinets. âAnd are you going to tell me what happened the other day? You left without saying anything.â
Wade hops onto a stool at the kitchen counter, swinging his legs like a child. âYou know Al. When it comes to sleeping, sheâs like a much older version of Sleeping Beauty,â he replies with a grin, snatching the mug you were about to use for your morning coffee. âThanks, youâre such a doll.â
âThat wasâmine,â you sigh, hitting him in the thigh, and Wade winces with a fake whine. âI donât think Iâve missed you that much. Go back to being missing in action,â you say, grabbing another mug and filling it before raising it toward Logan. âCoffee?â
Logan hesitates. Youâre treating him like youâve known him for years, not minutes. âIâm⊠good.â
âYou sure? I made it fresh, just before you guys arrived.â
âDonât worry, Iâmââ
âI love the chemistry here,â Wade interrupts your conversation, drawing your attention back to him, âbut you still got the keys I gave you, right?â
You roll your eyes, blowing on your steamy coffee before answering. âI do, but I want answers first. And I want them now.â
Twenty minutes and a rambling, half-coherent story later, your drink has gone cold, and Loganâs patience is wearing thin⊠again.
Will he survive sleeping under the same roof as Wade? Stay tuned for more.
âAnd then I told Paradox âHe has risen, babygirlâââ
âI think youâre being too specific,â Logan interjects, noting how youâre staring into space with wide eyes. âShe seems confused.â
âI am,â you admit, rubbing your temples. He doesnât blame you: Wadeâs a terrible storyteller. You offer him a weak smile as you turn to him. âSo⊠youâre from another universe.â
âLast time I checked.â His back collapses against the couch, groaning softly. He sits beside you, and the way your eyes sweep over him, taking in his disheveled and sweaty appearance, doesnât go unnoticed by him.
âAnd how is it? I mean, do you haveââ
âIâm public enemy number one.â
Too harsh, idiot.
âOh. Thatâs⊠good to know.â
Wade says your name, and you look to your right, lifting your brows. âDo you mind if I grab the keys myself? I need a shower. Iâve been marinating in sweat and blood for way too long.â
You grimace, pointing toward your room. âTop drawer of my nightstand.â
With that, he embarks on a quest to find them, leaving Logan alone with you. Silence stretches between you two.
He doesnât know what to say, or if he should even say anything. Casual conversation isnât his forte.
âYou and WadeâŠ?â
Letting out a giggle, you lean back on the couch. âGod, no. Weâre just friends,â you explain, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. For a fleeting moment, your eyes bore into his, and then you return to burning holes in the floor. âIâm single. Havenât found my soulmate yet.â
Itâs his turn to chuckle nowâa dark, humorless sound rumbling in his chest. You chew on a cuticle, Loganâs gesture igniting a sense of curiosity in you.
âWhat?â you ask him, puzzled.
âDo you really believe in that? Soulmates who share scars?â If he were to think carefully, heâd watch his tone. Itâs too late, anywayâyou straighten your posture, your face contorting with each passing second. âI can tell you do.â
âAnd I can tell you donât.â
âWhy would I? Those are lies,â he retorts, the corners of his mouth turning upward.
His opinion is anything but objective, totally biased, given that every time he dove into loveâs arms, he was met with the crude reality: not everyoneâs meant to be loved, himself included.
The look you give him is enough to wipe the smirk off his face.Â
âSoulmates exist, Logan. We all have one.â Thereâs a certainty in your tone, marked by the subtle way in which you say his name, that he finds alluring. He shouldnât, especially when you seem angry above all.Â
âAnd where is yours, then?â
He regrets it as soon as the words leave his mouth. Your expression becomes inscrutable. You could be either disappointed, frustrated, or even exasperatedâsad, perhaps?
Logan feels as though a weight has settled on his shoulders just from staring into your eyes.
You strike back with silence. Plain, pure, dreadful silence that has him wondering if heâs breathing properly.
At long last, Wade comes back from his expedition, keys dangling from his fingers. âIt was quite the treasure hunt, you know? Youâve got a lot of garbage in there.â He sticks his face between Loganâs and yours when you don't answer him. âGuys, is there something wrong? Are you doing a staring contest? If so, can I join?â
âI need to start getting ready for work,â you announce, standing up from the couch. Logan mimics you, and you open the door, your fingers curling around the knob. âYou should get going. And Wade,â you pause, acknowledging only him, âI need to talk to you later. In private.â
Without Logan. Thatâs what you wanted to say but didnât.
âSure, my queen. I live to serve,â Wade says in rejoinder, and he kisses your forehead briefly, which forces Logan to avert his gaze the whole time his lips are on you, feeling uncomfortable watching. âTake care, alright?âÂ
You give Wade a small nod, waiting until heâs outside your apartment to glance at Logan.
âGoodbye,â you croak, and he knows he should say something, that heâ
The door almost closes on his nose.
Had he been an asshole? He was merely expressing his thoughts. The idea of soulmates didnât sit well with him.
Once settled into Wadeâs apartment, Logan steps into the shower, water rinsing off his body. Yet he finds himself unable to stop thinking about you.
The disappointment in your eyes when he asked about your soulmate.
The coldness in your tone at the end, so different from the warmth you initially offered.
He feels drawn to you, as if some sort of invisible string is tying the two of you. Were it possible, he would use his own claws to cut it, but he canât discern where it begins or ends. Instead, he prefers to blame his touch-starved state for this reaction.Â
Heâs already hating this earth. So much for a man whose skin refuses to scar.
And where is yours, then?
His words shouldnât have stung the way they did. All the charmâthe gruff exterior, the mysterious personalityâhad vanished.
The guy from another universe, with the claws, the healing abilities, and the raspy voice, is a moron.
A ridiculously good-looking moron? Yes, but a moron nonetheless.
There is something about him you canât quite place. A chill creeps down your spine as you replay the instant your eyes first locked. Your body had reacted in ways it never had before, drawn to him like metal to a magnet.
Why? Youâd seen handsome men before, even been with some. Yet, youâve never felt thisâthis gravitational pull, this inexplicable pull to invade someoneâs personal space.
How would your soulmate feel if he saw you like this, lusting after another man?
You shudder at the thought. This isnât like you. You pride yourself on loyaltyâperhaps a little too much. You donât read two books at the same time, and youâve been buying the same brand of shampoo for the past five years.
So why now? Why him? It feels like a betrayal of your own mind, your conscience turned against you.
Let things stay as they areâitâs safer that way. You donât want to know the reason behind this forceful need.
After all, being his grumpy and ill-tempered self, heâll stay holed up in Wadeâs apartment, avoiding any interaction with the real world. And you? Youâll forget about him. Easy-peasy.
That afternoon, as you take a nap on the couch, he invades your dreams. Itâs not even a wet dream, but heâs there, staking a claim on a part of you he has no right to.
You wake up with your hand clutching your chest, a frustrated punch landing on the nearest cushion.
The next day, you drop by Wadeâs place for a quick visit, your eyes darting around the room every few seconds, half-expecting Logan to appear out of nowhere.
âI told you, heâs sleeping. That guyâs got a fucked up sleep schedule,â Wade says, urging you to take a seat beside him at the table. âWhy donât you wanna see him?â
Because heâs messing with your sanity. Your brain cells are practically disintegrating at the mere thought of breathing the same air as him.
âI justâI need to tell you something.â
âAre you pregnant?â
âWhat? Wade, no! Youâve been gone for three daysâpregnancies take months.â
âIâd make an amazing uncle, though.â He grabs your hand between his, his eyes sparkling with mischief. âBabies are so adorable at thatââ
âMy scars are back,â you cut him off, putting an end to his nonsense. Pulling the neck of your sweater to the side, you show him the thin lines etched into your collarbone. âBut they are different this time.â
âDifferent? You mean they changed?â His disbelief is clear as he reaches for your arm, frowning while he inspects more of your scars. Wadeâs jaw slackens, color draining out of his face. âFuck. Fuck!â
âFuck?â
âYeah, fuck!â His strong arms envelop you, and you lean into the embrace, resting your cheek against his shoulder. âIs this good news? Are we happy? Does this mean I have a shot at becoming an uncle after all?â
You laugh a little at his eagerness, rubbing gentle circles into his back. âI am happy. I justâI donât know what these changes mean yet.â
Althea steps out of the bathroom, her cane tapping the floor in rhythmic beats. âI already told you what they mean.â
Wade pulls away from you, glaring at her. âYou meddler! Havenât we talked about not eavesdropping? Hasnât life taught you anything after all these decades?â
âUpside of being blind: Iâve never seen this motherfucker in Crocs,â she says, pointing her cane at you, though you know her aim is Wade. âDownside of being blind: I hear everything in this apartment. And you, kid, have a new soulmate.â
âI know what we talked about the other day, but... it doesnât make sense, Al. You only get one soulmate,â you protest, feeling the tension grow as you pace around the table. âWhy canât it just be simple? My friends are getting engaged, years are flying by, and Iâm still out here chasing this⊠this idiot who no one can even find!â
Thatâs when Logan appears, emerging from his room, holding several empty beer cans. He rolls his eyes and walks straight into the kitchen. âGreat. Who else is coming tonight?â
Wade smirks, clapping a hand on Loganâs shoulder as he looks at you. âSweetie, Loganâs going through his second puberty at the ripe old age of two hundred. The pediatrician said itâs just hormones, nothing to worry about. Excuse his shitty attitude.â
With a low groan, Logan shrugs off Wadeâs hand, scowling. If anything, the younger manâs grin just grows bigger. âWolvie, I gotta admit that whole âDonât fall in love with me or Iâll break your heartâ personality shouldnât turn me on, but here we are.â
You decide to take that as your cue to leave. You grab your bag, muttering a quick goodbye to Althea as you head for the door.
But Logan calls after you. âCan we talk?â
You freeze, your back to him. âHow much did you hear?â you ask, not daringânot being ableâto meet his gaze.
âAll of it,â he admits after a beat, and you curse under your breath. âBut it doesnâtâHey!â He follows you into the hallway. âIâm talking to you!â
âNo, youâre not.â You fumble for your keys, fingers shaking as you try to unlock your door. âLeave me alone.â
âI wonât,â he mumbles behind you, his voice softer now. âCome on. Donât be so harsh.â
âI canât believe you,â you whisper, finally finding the right key and jiggling it into the lock. The door swings open, and you step into the safety of your apartment. But when you try to close it, Loganâs foot wedges into the gap, blocking it. âGet out.â
He doesnât budge. âNo.â
âLogan, Iâm not in the mood.â
âWell, me neither. But I owe you an apology.â
You wonder if he realizes the hold he has on you. No matter how hard you try to mask it, the unbearable pounding of your heart betrays you.
Scanning his features, you trace the rugged contours of his face with your eyes, lingering on the lines on his foreheadâthe aftermath of what it looks like a life lived through bitterness and pain.
âCan I come in?â he insists, his tone on the verge of sounding pleading.
You hesitate. The sensible part of you screams to send him away. Thinking that avoiding him would be as easy as stealing candy from a baby is a long-forgotten idea now: youâd been naĂŻve to even consider it possible.
Heâs going to find a way to sneak into your space, your homeâand youâll let him in. Youâll grant him a chance to cross a boundary that shouldâve been already drawn.
It feels like youâre fifteen again, infatuated with the guy you know you shouldnât get close to. Paul from high school wasnât your soulmate back thenâLogan isnât now.
The smart thing would be to take a step back, accept his apology, and ask him to leave. Thatâs how you preserve what little remains of your sanity and protect your heart, which is already hanging by a thread.
But God, it feels so good to be near him.
You step aside. He walks in. Something tells you this wonât be the last time.
âIâm waiting.â You stay near the counter, pressing your back against it, and keeping your distance. Logan sits awkwardly on the edge of your couch, unsure of where to begin.
âLook, about what I said yesterdayâŠI didnât mean it. Iâm sorry.â He sounds sincere, earnest. âI didnât know you believed in soulmates.â
âItâs not a matter of believing in them or not, Logan. My soulmate is out thereâyours too.â
Your words coax a grin from him, and he shakes his head. âI guess weâll never see eye to eye on that.â In a fluid motion, he crosses the room, and you find his unexpected proximity a bit exasperating. âDo you forgive me?â
âIâll think about it.â
âGive me a break, darlinâ. Iâm trying my best.â
âWell, you were an asshole.â
âYes.â
âThe first time we exchanged words.â
âAlso yes.â
âAnd now youâre apologizing.â
âPositive. I just did.â
Itâs not that youâre easyâitâs Loganâs persuasive allure that gets to you.
âWhat else can I do to win your forgiveness?â he wonders aloud, his syrupy voice making you tighten your grip on the counter.
An idea sparks in your mind. You move toward the pile of books next to the TV, eyeing the titles, until one catches your attention: your copy of Jane Eyre by Charlotte BrontĂ«, one of the first novels youâd read when you were younger.
Itâs adorned with colorful post-its, and the pages, sort of rough to the touch, are marked with handwritten notes in the margins.
âHow do you feel about reading?â
âNot my strongest suit,â he answers, arching a brow as he takes in your enthusiasm. âWhatâs going on in that head of yours?â
âYou want me to believe youâre sorry for what you said? Then read this,â you say, wiggling the book in front of him, âand we can start over.â
âWhat is it about? Let me guess: love and soulmates. Did I get it right?â he asks, playfulness lacing his tone. His breath hitches as you press the book against his chest, silently urging him to take it. His pinky grazes your hand, feeling your skin and sending a jolt through you.
Logan watches you with half-lidded eyes, and it takes every ounce of willpower to tear yourself away from him and his maddening touch.
You clear your throat. âOpen it to page one hundred fifty-three.â
âDo youâyou remember specific pages?â
âAnd read whatâs underlined in black,â you murmur, eyes fluttering closed for an instant. âPlease.â
Logan must mutter something along the lines of âYouâve got to be kidding meâ before searching for it. Itâs only then that he begins to recite the passage:
He is not to them what he is to me. He is not of their kind. I believe he is of mine; â I am sure he is â I feel akin to him â I understand the language of his countenance and movements; though rank and wealth sever us widely, I have something in my brain and heart, in my blood and nerves, that assimilates me mentally to him. Did I say, a few days since, that I had nothing to do with him but to receive my salary at his hands? Did I forbid myself to think of him in any other light than a paymaster? Blasphemy against nature! Every good, true, vigorous feeling I have gathers impulsively round him. I know I must conceal my sentiments: I must smother hope; I must remember that he cannot care much for me. For when I say that I am of his kind, I do not mean that I have his force to influence, and his spell to attract; I mean only that I have certain tastes and feelings in common with him. I must, then, repeat continually that we are for ever sundered: â and yet, while I breathe and think, I must love him.
Youâve chosen a damn good page.
Logan looks up from the book, his mouth slightly parted, as if heâs about to speak. You interject before he can find the words.
âYouâve got a week to read it.â
âHow long is it again?â
âFour hundred pages.â
He surrenders, sighing in defeat. âYouâre killing me here, yâknow?â
âWrite an opinion essay if possible.â
Right there, Logan offers you a mock laugh. âHaha. Thatâs so funny.â
âIt is for me,â you talk back, unable to hide your smile from him, and soon he mirrors your expression.Â
As Logan steps toward the door, he hesitates and glances back. âWeâre all good then?â
Leaning against the doorframe, you raise your chin defiantly. âWeâll be when you finish the book.â
What he says next has your stomach turning into knots. âYouâre trouble.â His tone shiftsâno longer teasing, but grounded in truth. Gone are the jokes; he seems to mean every word.
For the rest of the night, one line from the book doesnât stop echoing in your mindâthe line about soulmates: I have something in my brain and heart, in my blood and nerves, that assimilates me mentally to him.Â
Youâre trouble for him, and heâs trouble for you. You hope he knows it too.
He thought that not seeing you for a week would snuff out his feelings. That by next Wednesday, every thought tied to your name, every urge to uncover the last of your secrets, would be extinguished.
That's what time usually did: it diminished dangerous desires that couldn't afford to be voiced, and buried those longings that had no place in the light of day.
Logan now figures heâs been underestimating the spell you cast on him with just a few glances and the intensity of your eyes. Heâs seen you animated, angryâboth defiant and vulnerable.
Each of your gestures feels like a memory he canât quite place.
The way you laugh, the right corner of your mouth lifting just slightly higher than the leftâhe swears it isnât the first time he's seen a smile brighter than the sun.
Still, he convinces himself itâs all in his head. He must be the one losing his mind, the years finally catching up to him. Itâs the only reasonable explanation for the thoughts that consume his every waking moment.
Heâs wrongâyouâre right. Heâs seeing things where there are noneâyouâre simply too kind.
Too kind. Too young. Too damn clever for your own good, with your books and that sharp mind of yours. He wonders how you see yourself.
Do you like the reflection in the mirror? Are you content with the way your life has turned out?
Do you, too, lie awake at night, the bed stretching endlessly, aching for a touch that never comes?
The walls in this place are paper-thin. When darkness falls, and the moon rises, the big, scary Wolverine canât close his eyes.
Instead, he listens.
Some nights, you play the same movie on repeatâa romantic comedy that lasts exactly one hundred and twenty minutes. For two hours straight, heâs privy to your laughter, your commentary at the characters on the screen.
He hears you cry when the lead couple drifts apart after a terrible argument, but they always find their way back to each other, and you watch every second until the credits roll.
None of the other films you pick ever ends in heartbreak, he realizes. They all have happy endingsâthe kind you wish for yourself.
One way or another, there must be a way to get you out of his system. He knows, without a doubt, that you wouldnât want him. Heâs not your soulmate, and itâs clear that finding that person has become the center of your existence.
Logan canât allow himself to be the moron who derails your purpose.
Sure, heâs done bad things, but he likes to believe that at least a part of himâsome small fractionâhasnât been lost yet. That thereâs a piece of him that can be saved, which is the reason why he stayed here: to be a better man than the one he was in his universe.
But itâs hard. Harder still because itâs you who disrupts his quest for redemption. How is he supposed to go on with his life when every thought circles back to you? The idea of holding you, kissing youâsleeping beside you haunts him.
And so the images blur, new dreams twisting with his usual nightmares.
Which one is worse, he can no longer tell.
One afternoon, while deliberately steering clear of Jane Eyre, he reluctantly turns to Wade in search of answers. âTell me more about her.â
Wade, lounging on the couch, stops scrolling on his phone and drops it onto his chest, drawing his eyebrows together.
âHer? Who do you mean?â His tone oozes with feigned innocence, barely containing a shit-eating grin when Logan grits out your name, his tone rough, almost pained. âOh, Romeo. Youâve got it bad.â
Intending to maintain some semblance of control, Logan strides into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and the last bottle of whiskey. As he tips it, only a few drops fall into the glass.
âNo, I donât,â he says, extending his arm and holding the bottle up. âWeâre out of whiskey.â
âYou keep saying we, but youâre the only alcoholic in this apartment.â Wade kicks off his shoes, propping his feet on the coffee table. âSo, why the sudden interest in the lady? She getting through that tough exterior of yours? Iâll give her points for that.â
âAnd you wonder why I donât talk to you.â
âI saw the book,â the younger man replies, lacing his fingers behind his head, watching as Logan rummages through the fridge with increasing frustration. âYou never told me you were into classics. If Iâd known, Iâd have gotten you a copy of Pride and Prejudice.â
âShut your mouth.â
âIâm sorry, werenât you the one who came to me, looking for the essential oil of truth?â
The silence that follows is thick and uncomfortable, mood-killing.
âSee what I just did there?â he adds, and Logan feels forced to shake his head from side to side, appearing conflicted. Wade lets out a low huff. âThat was Virginia Woolf. Add her to your reading list.â
âHas anyone ever told you how obnoxious you are?â
âMore times than I can count. Iâm just not everyoneâs cup of coffee.â
âTea, Wade. Not everyoneâs cup of tea.â
âWhatever.â Wade simpers, as though Loganâs correction is the punchline to a joke only he gets. He sets his palms flat on the table, looming closer with a mischievous glint in his eyes. âSo, what would you like to know about my dear friend?â
Logan hesitates, the weight of his question heavy on his tongue. âWhatâs the deal with her scars?â
The air shifts. Wadeâs playful expression fades and he tilts his head, his tone turning serious. âI donât think itâs my story to tell,â he begins, gaze dropping to the floor. âBut she lost them years ago. She was living a normal life, and one day, they were justâgone, like they were never there. It broke her. We didnât know each other back then, but youâve seen her.â
Wadeâs eyes flick back up, while Logan stands there, tongue-tied. âYou even know the kind of books she readsânothing can shake that belief in real love, in soulmates being destined. Imagine how she mustâve felt when she found out her presumed soulmate was dead⊠without a single warning.â
From what he had heard, that sense of loss was impossible to put into words. Those whoâd gone through it described the experience as if half of youâyour body, your soul, your very essenceâwas being ripped away.
The pain was excruciating, and the only way to survive it was by means of tolerating itâno remedy, just the endurance to outlast the agony.
It wasnât just a momentary hurt. It was the kind of torment that lingered, making you question who you were and what little remained of you.
You and Logan had more in common than heâs willing to admit.
âSheâs a good person,â he mutters absent-mindedly, his thumb grazing the cover of the book. He had carried it everywhere for a week now, without even cracking it open.
âOh, you dirty pigâŠâ Wade whispers, his eyes lighting up as if a lightbulb suddenly went off in his mind. âNow I get it. You wanna know her. Like, really know her!â
âI donâtââ
âYour sex life is none of my business. Iâm all up for you putting your mutant dick to work, otherwise itâs just wasted potential. But itâs my friend weâre talking about.â
Loganâs jaw tightens, and he snaps. âDrop the speech, alright? Iâm not trying to get into her pants. I just want to be nice. Thatâs all.â
âNice, huh? Whatâs your version of nice? Starting a two-person book club?â Wade stifles a laugh, pressing a finger to Loganâs chest. âLook, if you want to sleep with her, and the feelingâs mutual, then go for it. Just tell me thisâhow longâs it been since you visited Pussy Village? Was it before or after the Big Bang?â
Things are never truly serious with Wade Wilson. âIâm not answering that.â
Wade raises both hands in surrender, still chuckling. âFine, fine. But if youâre really interested, just be clear about it. She doesnât need a half-assed situationship.â
By now, itâs like a mantra he repeats again and again, hoping that eventually both Wade and he will start to believe it. âI donât want to have sex with her.â
As he heads back to his (now Wadeâs old) room, Wade adds, âIâm sure sheâd appreciate it if you underlined some quotes you like.â
Much to his dismay, thatâs exactly what Logan does.
His handwriting isnât the most legible, but he tries his best, leaving notes in the margins of some pages, such as:
I hate this John kid.
Her aunt is a cunt.
This is too cheesy.
Mr. Rochesterâs married?
St. Johnâwhat a prick.
He finishes the book at 7 a.m. A long-ass bookâjust for you. While getting ready for work, Wade calls him an unemployed fucker, and Logan knows nothing better than to shoot back a similar insult, stretching his arms as the first rays of sunlight creep through the curtains.
Wade was right about something, even if Logan himself doesnât wish to admit it: heâs behaving like a teenagerâstaying up until dawn, practically chained to the bed without daring to go out. Falling for a girl he didnât know a week ago.
Learning to control his impulses has been a hard task, especially with his temperament. Over the years, Logan thought heâd mastered the art of self-restraint, long past the point where his body moved without his mindâs permission.
As his feet carry him down the hall toward your apartment, he recognizes how wrong he is.
This is a terrible idea, he thinks. And yet, his fist knocks on the wood. Three times.
Fuck.
The door opens just a crack. You peek out, your face barely visible, eyes puffy from sleep. âLogan?â
His name isnât a fancy one. Itâs pretty normal, pretty standard. There must be a thousand other guys named like himâyet itâs only when you say it, your voice turning it into something rare and unique, that it feels different, like itâs only his.
The tone you use with him isnât the one heâs used to: Logan, youâre a disappointment. Logan, how dare you turn your back on your friends? Logan, theyâre all dead. Logan, itâs your fault.
Yours is inviting, and warm, and new. He likes new.
âI just finished it,â he answers, holding up the book, mindful not to grip it too tight as not to crumple the pages.
You scratch the back of your head, blinking at him. âYou just finished it⊠at 7 a.m.?
Yeah, it sounds stupid now that you say it out loud, but itâs true. Hoping his reaction is enough to explain what he canât put into words, he gives you a slow nod.
This time, you donât wait for him to say more. âCome in?â
Yes, this is what heâs been looking forward all week. This moment, this interaction.
This Come in. This Yes, thank you. Youâre so kind.
His quiet acceptance of your invitation, the unpronounced thought of I donât deserve this, but I canât back off now, because how could I ever say no to you?
He follows you into the kitchen as you move to make tea. âWant some?â you ask, but he declines the offer. If he were to drink anything right now, it would be something much stronger, not tea, despite the early hour. âYouâre here to talk about the book?â
âWell, you told me I could come back after reading it.â
âI did,â you say, a small smile tugging at your lips as you hide it behind your mug. âI just wasnât expecting you to be so punctual.â
You donât need to know that heâs been counting down the seconds, marking each minute in his mind since the last time he saw you. Thatâs a detail heâll keep to himself. âItâs a good story.â
âTell me about it.â You smile even wider, and he takes a moment to absorb the details of your faceâthe crinkles by your eyes, the way your nose scrunches when youâre amused. âI lent you my most precious book. Fell in love with it years ago.â
âI can see why you liked it,â he explains, flipping through the pages to find the one he marked. âAll the romance and the yearningââ
âHey, itâs also good for other reasons,â you try to defend yourself, but any other argument dies on your lips when he finds the passage he was looking for and begins to read aloud.
âI sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you, especially when you are near me, as now,â he recites, his voice lower, almost reverent, as he looks up from the page to meet your gaze. âIt is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your frame.â
You seem startled by the sharp sound of him closing the book. Heâs sort of breathless, and from where he stands, he can tell you are too. âThatâs one of my favorite passages.â
âI canât blame you for believing in soulmates if this is the kind of thing you read growing up,â he teases, handing the book back to you.
Though a part of him almost wishes he didnât have toâso that it would still be a reason, a tether, pulling him back to you again and again.
Grinning, you take it, your eyes remaining trained on his. âI happen to notice it hasnât changed your perspective on soulmates.â
âItâll take more than a book.â
âThis is, in my opinion, one of the best love stories ever written. How else will I convince you?â
âWhy do you feel like you need to convince me?â He takes a step forwardâyou take a step back. âWhy canât it be the other way around? I might end up being the one who convinces you.â
âYou could never,â you respond, clasping your hands behind your back. âIt would be like convincing me the sky is green instead of blue.â
Logan retreats slightly. âDonât you get tired?â
âOf what?â
âOf waiting. Of always being on the lookout.â
You donât react badly to his question. Youâre not even shaken, not fazed in the slightest. âWhen I meet him, Iâll know all the waiting was worth it.â
âAnd in the meantime?â Logan inquires, pressing himself further into your intimacy, edging closer as if testing the boundaries youâre willing to cross. His words are a subtle request for more, for answers. âWhat will you do until you find him?â
If you ever do, he thinks, but itâs left unsaid, lingering in his thoughts. Heâs getting better at not saying the things that sit heavy in his chest without thinking.
âI think you misunderstand, Logan.â You study him through your lashes, and he feels heâs become the keeper of your most sacred secrets. âItâs not about waiting as if my lifeâs on pause. Iâve been with other people. But in the end, I want to choose him.â
That casual admission strikes him like a wave of cold water. A flicker of jealousy burns at the edges of his composure, though he tries to smother it.
Iâve been with other people, you say, your tone so nonchalant, and yet the mental images that flood his mind are anything but comfortable.
He imagines someone else standing in your kitchen. Perhaps in five minutes, there will be another man knocking on your door, here to discuss a book, and it wonât be him.
Perhaps this isnât rare for youâall this come in, grab something to drink, letâs talk when youâre done reading.
Perhaps heâs not as important as you make him feel.
His thoughts spiral until your voice pulls him back from the brink.
âDonât you understand how beautiful it is?â Thereâs a dazzling glint in your expression, a light in your eyes that makes him ache. âOutside of these four walls, thereâs a person whoâs waiting to meet me, in the same way I expect to meet him. I canât grant myself the choice not to believe in something like this.â
Far from easing the martyr in his mind, this conversation only deepens his internal struggle. The questions overlap each other: what happens if you never find him? Would you ever consider settling for somebody else?
He rephrases that last oneâwould you ever consider being with him?
âHeâs a lucky guy,â Logan murmurs, and just like that, he feels himself slipping deeper, falling into the rabbit hole with you guiding him through the madness.
For a moment, he can pretendâpretend that matching scars and bonds that defy the rules of his principles make sense.
Maybe, just for you, heâll allow himself to believe it.
Your eyes soften with sudden emotion, glistening with the beginnings of tears. He feels the primal urge to reach out, to cup your cheek, to be there when the first tear falls. âYou think so?â you ask, your voice fragile.
I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you, especially when you are near me, as now.
âOf course I do,â he replies, his tone quiet but laden with a strange, undeniable truth.
It is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your frame.
Whatever this is between youâitâs messed up. Heâs messed up. And you⊠youâre just as tangled in this chaos for indulging it, for looking at him in that way that calls out to him.
The more time he spends with you, the less he feels like himself. Everything heâs done latelyâreading that damn book, standing in your apartment at 7 a.m.ânone of it feels like something heâd do.
Itâs not just his mind youâre messing with: itâs his very sense of self.
Loganâs smart mouth had always been a liability, getting him into trouble either by saying too much or by choosing the wrong words. Bad things had always followed in the wake of his tongue.
Somehow, when it comes to you, heâs the most careful heâs ever been. He doesnât want to upset you, nor does he want to be the cause of any sorrow that might affect your heart.
When the two of you stand at the threshold once more, just as you have other times before, you softly say: âI feel like Iâm experiencing a dĂ©jĂ vu.â
He laughs, because it sounds ridiculous. âCare to explain why?â
âYou come, we talk, you leave.â You lean against the wall, your hand ghosting over the handle. âBut you never stay that long.â
Thereâs no mistaking the layered meaning in your words. You, who work with language and its peculiarities for a living, never speak by chanceâevery phrase, every pause, carries an assigned weight. The double meaning in your statement doesnât escape either of you.
Youâre a natural at this madness, diving headfirst into it. You must be losing it, too, because your actions donât match what you said before.
Slowly, his fingers brush a loose strand of hair behind your ear, the perfect excuse to feel your skin, to close the distance without saying what he actually wants.
They say food and shelter are the basic human needs, but Logan chooses to believe they forgot to include the longing to reach out and just feel you.
âI canât stay,â he finally responds to your earlier comment, his hand still lingering against your skin.
His strengthâthe only thing saving him from completely giving inâhelps him pull himself away.
Before the impulse to kiss you becomes too overwhelming to resist, Logan leaves.
Some time later, youâre making lunch, music playing softly in the background at the same time the cityâs distinct noise finds a way to break through your tranquility.
You rely greatly on the knowledge that youâre good at multitaskingânow more than ever, with a book in one hand and the other stirring the pasta on the stove.
The warmth from the pot rises around you, but you trust yourself not to be careless. Not to be stupid enough to burn yourself with the boiling water.
This time, you miscalculate. Not only do you dip the wooden spoon into the pot, but your fingertips too.
Though it only lasts a second, and the voice in your head instantly screams Hot! Hot! Hot!, the shock makes you drop the book to the floor. You yank your hand back, racing to the sink to run it under cold water.
âFuck,â you grumble, watching the skin redden in protest. âLesson learned: no more multitasking.â
The funny thing is, just a door away, Loganâs watching a movie with Wade when he feels a sting in the tips of his fingers.
Itâs barely there, practically faint, but he looks down, inspecting his hand like it doesnât belong to his own body. His skin briefly flushes with irritation before returning to its normal state.
Wade notices his distraction. âHey, you okay?â
Logan pays no mind to it. âSure. Just felt something strange.â
Is it still called avoiding if youâre both doing it? Youâd like to think so.
For the sake of clarity, letâs say youâve been actively avoiding Logan, but truth be toldâheâs been avoiding you too. That last encounter in your apartment didnât help matters at all.
If anything, it made everything worse.
Youâve been down this road before, knowing men like him too well: theyâre everywhere, until theyâre not.
One day, they vanish without a trace, leaving you staring at the empty space they used to occupy, asking yourself âWhat happened to my Prince Charming in disguise?â
They disappear as though they never existed, and not even the best detective can track them down.
So far, your avoidance strategy has worked wonders. Maybe itâs for the best. Heâs a distractionâan undeniably attractive one, the kind anyone would want to trip over.
Yet you miss him, which is dumb: why are you missing someone you were never supposed to care about in the first place?
You return home after a long trip to the grocery store, arms laden with bags. Itâs the kind of errand that exhausts you, though you keep telling yourself itâs better than thinking about him.
As you struggle to get through the building's exit, you resign yourself to the fact that itâll take several trips to bring everything up to your apartment.
Then the elevator doors slide open, and you drop everything to the floor.
You shouldâve known better than to assume victory so soon. After days of successfully avoiding him, there he is.
And of course, itâs when you look your worstâtired from running around, weighed down by groceries, barely holding it together.
âHey,â he greets you, standing just outside the elevator, like heâs not sure if he should step inside or stay where he is. Heâs dressed in a red-and-black flannel shirt, layered over a white vest, a leather jacket tossed over his shoulders, and a pair of jeans that seem made for him.
He looks... ridiculously good.
âHi,â you manage to answer after a beat, scrambling to collect the bags youâd dropped. âJustâgive me a second.â
âLet me help you,â Logan says, ducking down to gather the groceries, but you pull them away.
âIâve got it. Are you going out? On a date, maybe?â You nod toward his clothes, trying to keep things light, teasing even.
Glancing down at himself, a crease appears between his brows, and in one swoop, he gathers all the bags with a single hand. âIâm supposed to meet Wade at a bar, but heâll survive without me.â
âLogan, you donâtââ
But heâs already moving, one hand tugging you out of the elevator, the other gesturing toward your apartment.
âNot up for debate,â he mutters. Then, without waiting for permission, he holds out his hand. âKeys.â
Sighing, you dig into your pocket and drop them into his open palm. He unlocks the door with practiced ease, stepping inside and placing the bags on your kitchen counter.
As he starts to unpack them, you stop him. âYou really donât need to do that.â
That seems to catch his attention. He pauses, turning toward you with his arms crossed over his chest, leaning against the counter.
His unrelenting stare sizes you up, and he cocks his head to the side. âHavenât seen you in a while.â
He thinks heâs so discreet, so smooth. âWell, Iâve been busy,â you explain, fiddling with the frayed edge of your sweater, tugging at it like it might unravel your nerves.
You hear him click his tongue. âBeen busy too.â His words hang in the air, thickening the atmosphere. Your body tenses, and you stare at his shoes, untilâ âSweetheart,â he calls you softly, and your eyes snap shut for a moment, your chin almost pressing against your chest. âMy eyes are up here.â
A quick flutter of your lashes brings you back to him, and your chest tightens with the effort it takes to look into his eyes. âDonât you have somewhere to be?â you ask, praying heâll let this go.
You watch as his mouth twitches with something halfway between a smile and a smirk. âYou already want me to leave?â
âIf you have plans, then yeah.â
He huffs out a laugh, inhaling a shallow breath like youâve missed something obvious. âWade can wait. Heâll be fine.â His expression shifts, and the playful tone in his voice falls away, replaced by something more raw. âYouâve been avoiding me.â
You canât help but snort. âOh, please. Like you havenât been doing the same.â You walk over to the couch, feeling your legs wobble beneath you. You collapse into one corner, hoping the distance will help you breathe.
Like a shadow, Logan follows after you, sitting far too close. His legs splay wide, so wide theyâre almost grazing yours.
âAt least I have a reason for it. What about you?â His hand reaches out, fingers closing around yours in a grip thatâs both firm and gentle, enhancing your anxiety. Your throat tightens, the room shrinking around you. âI need you to tell me Iâm not crazy,â he says, his voice rough and low. âI need you to tell me you feel it too.â
Panic flares in your chest, and you scramble for time. âI donât know what youâre talking about,â you mutter, but your voice cracks, the uncertainty leaking through the cracks in your bravado.
He doesnât buy your acting. âYou do. We canât keep playing dumb. Youâre gonna make me lose my fuckinâ mind one of these days.â
Itâs not just his wordsâitâs the way he stands so close, heat radiating from his body, the roughness of his hand gripping yours like heâs terrified youâll slip away.
The intensity of it all weighs on you in ways you canât even begin to describe, leaving you breathless, caught between denial and desire.
âLogan, this isnâtââ
âWhat? Okay?â Thereâs a glimpse of mirthlessness in his tone as he speaks, his forehead furrowing. âI canât stay away from you, donât you see it? It feels too good to be wrong,â he utters, inching forward. You know you should take a step back, tell him to stop. Nothing good can come from this. âIt takes two to feel these things. It canât be just me.â
âThat doesnât mean we have to give in.â Blood pounds in your ears, your pulse racing as your heart hammers unpleasantly. Little shivers of ice run through your spine, and yet, your stomach burns with desire.
More than ever, you feel yourself slipping, your sanity at risk.
Logan runs his eyes up and down your face, agitated, almost going cross-eyed. âEarlier you asked if I was going on a date. Would you like that? Me being with other people? Kissing another woman?â His hot breath caresses your cheek, and you avert your gaze momentarily. âAnswer me.â
Donât do it. For the love of God, donât. âI canâtâI donâtââ
âCome on, baby.â
âI donât want you to be with other people,â you mumble, your lips almost grazing his, and thatâs all he needs to grip your chin and pull you into a kiss.
His mouth moves hungrily over yours, pushing you back until the armrest digs into your lower back. A choked whimper gets lost in your throat, and you bring him closer by grabbing onto the lapels of his jacket, your chest pressing against his.
Logan bites down on your lip, soothing the sting with his tongue, and the moan you let out reverberates in the apartment.
âThis is what you were hiding from me?â he rasps, his forehead bumping against yours. âThese sweet sounds you make?â
You end up perched in his lap, your thighs bracketing his hips. Heâs hard beneath you, and as you shift, your center makes contact with his erection through the layers of fabric.
Both of you sigh into each otherâs mouths, your hips moving on their own accord, rocking slightly against his clothed cock. He hooks one of his arms around your waist, guiding your movements.
Everything seems to fall into place. Outside your window, birds chirp. The world feels lighter, like a better place. The beast inside you quiets, and for once, your mind is blissfully blank.
Logic? Error 404ânot found.
You tug at his hair, and Logan growls, breaking the kiss. âDo that again.â He jerks under your touch, bucking up into you. Encouraged, you pull his hair again, fingers wrapping around a strand at the nape of his neck, and youâre rewarded with a deep groan.
Heâs dizzy for it, but youâre no better, not when he trails his kisses down your neck, his mouth latching onto your skin, tasting the sweat and salt.
âI canât control myself around you,â he murmurs, groping your tits, and you wail, the ache between your legs becoming intolerable. His hands slip under your sweater, caressing the scars on your back.
Thatâs when recognition settles over you.
What are you doing? And why are you doing it?
He ceases sucking your flesh when you go rigid on top of him. Pecking your lips once again, Loganâs hands cradle your face, his thumbs rubbing circles on your cheeks. âWhatâs wrong?â
You donât understand how he does it, how he can remain so calm. Doesnât he realize the gravity of this? âWe have to stop.â
âWhy?â
âDonât ask me something you already know the answer to.â
His arms drop to his sides, releasing you from his hold. You push yourself off him, away from the couch, putting as much distance between you as you can.
Pressing your palms to your eyes, you shake your head. âGod, Iâm stupid. This is stupid.â
Your reaction seems to get on his nerves, his frustration somehow increasing. Logan stands, towering over you. âWas it stupid when you were dry humping me?â
âFuck you, Logan.â
âIâm not the bad guy here. You kissed me back.â He doesnât let up, trailing behind you as you try to escape. âYou want me as much as I want you.â
âWill you stop saying that?â you bark, throwing your arms in the air. Your chest rises and falls with rapid breaths. âYeah, we like each other. So? Does that make it right? How can you just ignore how wrong this is?â
His expression hardens, anger flashing in his eyes. âForget your idea of what's good and bad. You're just upset you can't control what you feel.â
âHeâs closer than ever.â
Logan gawks at you, his voice bitter as he goes on with his rambling. âThat fucker again? Donât you ever get tired of talking about someone who you donât even know? Because youâre certainly wearing me out.â
âYou wish you were him, donât you?â You jab your finger into his chest, feeling his heartbeat, a flutter you choose to ignore. âYou want to be my soulmate.â
âDamn right I do,â he practically spits his words, narrowing his eyes at you. âBut Iâm not him.â
âNo. Youâre not.â
Everything seems to fall out of place. Outside your window, birds donât chirpâthey scream for mercy. The world doesnât feel lighter, but heavier. The beast inside you roars back to life, restless and louder than ever, while your mind spins in chaos.
âWe shouldnât see each other anymore.â Your voice pierces through the thick silence in the room, and you swallow down the lump forming in your throat.
âIf thatâs what you want,â he replies, his jaw clenched tight, irritation radiating off him in waves.
âItâs what we both need.â
âSpeak for yourself. I donât have a soulmate.â His tone is biting, but you donât miss the undercurrent of longing in his words. âBut if in any other universe I do, I hope itâs you.â
Your hand turns the knob, and then heâs halfway out the door, sparing you one last glance before he turns his back to you.
No more visits. No more books. No more bruising kisses that leave you questioning your mere existence.
Let things stay as they areâitâs safer that way. You donât want to know the reason behind this forceful need.
After all, being his grumpy and ill-tempered self, heâll stay holed up in Wadeâs apartment, avoiding any interaction with the real world. And you? Youâll forget about him. Easy-peasy.
It didnât go well in the end.
You remember your first heartbreakâseventeen, fresh out of high school. One of your hands clutched a million dreams, and the other, a pillow soaked with your tears.
Your mother remained by your side, caressing your back, attempting to soothe the sobs that racked your body. She murmured that itâd pass, that you wouldnât feel like this forever. You believed her then, and trusted that things would eventually be okay.
Almost ten years later, another heartbreak shouldnât come as a surprise. By now, you thought you wouldâve developed the tools to survive it. You should be able to piece yourself back together by instinct.
But life, as it turns out, has a peculiar way of catching you off guard.
Whether itâs pent-up horniness, touch-starvation, or genuine affectionâit doesn't change the fact that your pseudo-relationship with Logan fell apart.
Though youâre not the one whoâs suffering the most. Neither is Logan.
Wade, the third party in this tangled mess, has somehow taken it the hardest.
âI feel like a child of divorce,â he says, his head resting on your lap, eyes distant as they fixate on the peeling wallpaper. âYou need to do something about that.â
âIâll take care of it next month.â
Heâs supposed to be the one supporting you, but it feels like the roles are reversedâyouâre comforting him, letting him vent.
âMy two favorite people now canât even be in the same room. What are we gonna do for Christmas? New Year's Eve?â Straightening up, he grabs the nearest cushion and buries his face into it to muffle a defeated scream. âDamn it, Cupid! You had one job!â
All in all, Wadeâs emotionally unavailable at the moment, grieving your separation from Logan as if it were his own loss, too caught up in his melodrama to be of any real help.
Meanwhile, you fill your days with work, books, anything to keep your mind occupied.
You go to bed too late, you wake up too early. Sleep too little, cry too much.
One thing stays constantâyou and Logan donât talk. Stolen glances in the hallway, awkward elevator ridesâthose are the only remnants of whatever you once were. Back to being strangers again.Â
Well, not really. Strangers donât know the route to your mouth the way he does.
The ache lingers every day. Missing him when youâre awake is a common occurrence. At night, as you toss and turn beneath the sheets, he stars in your dreams. You canât recall the last time he wasnât lodged in your thoughts.Â
Where there used to be ideas, creativity, and plots worth scribbling down, thereâs now only Loganâa man destined to problematize your stay on earth.
That fucker again? Donât you ever get tired of talking about someone who you donât even know? Because youâre certainly wearing me out.
And yet, despite all of it, you continue to prioritize someone else. Someone who isnât even here. Clung to the idea of a soulmate, you chose him over Logan.
What did he expect? For you to abandon your principles, your belief in destiny? Itâs who you are. Nearly thirty years of life guided by one belief canât just be discarded like trash.
You liked to separate things into categories: good and bad, right and wrong. A simple method to structure everything, to make sense of your world, and it has worked most of the time.
But now? The limits of those sacred categories look blurred. Your judgment feels unreliable, and you wonder if the choices youâve made lately have been the correct ones.
Each of your decisions seems to be leading you further down a path you canât recognize.Â
Whatâs the goal? Finding your soulmate, the voice in your head mockingly answers for the hundredth time, rolling its imaginary eyes. And where is he?
Youâve shut Logan out, a man whoâs made it clear he has feelings for you, for this elusive person. Isnât it time he steps into the light at long last?
This is what you fear the most: loneliness.
You donât want to be the lone woman who sits by herself in a cafe, drawing pity from waitresses who discuss her solitude. By no means do you wish to be that friend who dispenses wise dating advice, but goes home to an empty bed. You refuse to become the godmother whose hand no one holds when her time comes.
No, this canât be all fate has to offer to you. There must be more. If your life were a book, youâd be flipping through the pages to the last chapter, desperate to see how it ends.
Or, better yet, youâd grab a pen and rewrite it yourself. What kind of ending youâll haveâyouâre not so sure about that.
Itâs Sunday, one of those endless weekends where the only way to survive is by rearranging your entire apartment. You could manage it alone, but help would be niceâWadeâs help, to be more precise, would be perfect for this kind of task, and you find yourself knocking on his door.Â
No answer. Deciding to dial his number to see if heâs fallen asleep, you try calling him, waiting through the rings until he finally picks up. âHey.â
Except itâs not Wadeâs voice that answers. âIâm sorry, who is this?â
The door swings open, and Logan appears right behind it, holding Wadeâs phone to his ear.
He narrows his eyes, leaning against the frame, a single eyebrow lifted in curiosity. âHow sad. You donât remember what I sound like.â
You feel foolish for still being on the call, so you lock your phone, ending it. âWhereâs Wade?â you ask, frowning as you hold your breath, your voice sharper than intended.
âOut and about. Didnât tell me where he was going,â Logan replies, glaring at you as he raises the phone to your face. âHe left without this.â
Abort mission! Nodding in agreement, you begin to step back. âGreat, Iâll look for him later.â
Youâre close to being locked up once again in the safety of your apartment when you hear him: âYou need anything?â
Itâs the most heâs said to you in weeks. You hesitate, keeping your back turned. âIâm moving some heavy stuff around. Thought I could use the help.â
âI could do it.â
No. Not really. Heâs doing that thing againâoffering help when you know you shouldnât accept it. You shake your head.
âItâs not necessary,â you say, forcing a casual tone.
âDoesnât have to mean anything,â he retorts, his footsteps heavy and deliberate as they draw closer. With each passing second, your options shrink, leaving you no room for retreat. âDonât worry. I wonât try to kiss you again if thatâs whatâs got you all worked up.â
âIâm not worked up,â you hiss, and he sidesteps you easily, his arm nudging yours.
The electricity is still there, undeniable, but neither of you has the courage to acknowledge it, acting as though itâs an ordinary occurrence.
His eyes roam the room, like heâs forgotten what your apartment looked like. He pauses by the bookshelf, his fingers gliding over the spine of Jane Eyre, and a low whistle escapes him as he slips it back into place.Â
You, frozen at the threshold, feel your irritation simmering just beneath the surface, and the urge to hide in your bedroom only becomes stronger.
After this, youâll have to burn your favorite book. What a pity.
âWhat do you want me to do?â he asks, hooking his fingers into the loops of his jeans, his posture both confident and annoyingly relaxed.
Thereâs a challenge in his tone, and he acts as if youâre the one who pulled him into this situationâlike he didnât worm his way in here.
You gesture toward the couch. âCan you put it by the window?â
He sets to work, moving the smaller pieces of furniture aside to make space for the couch. Under no circumstances are you going to just stand there and watch him sweat.
Instead, you busy yourself with the long-forgotten glasses and cups gathering dust in one of the kitchen cabinets, each one glinting with past disappointments.
Wetting a towel, you start by wiping the rims. The air feels heavily charged with uneasiness, but you're relieved that for once, you can breathe without feeling like youâre on the brink of a heart attack.
You can already imagine Wadeâs face when you tell himâ
âSo,â Loganâs voice cuts through the silence, startling you, âhowâs the search going? Got any luck?â
His words have the desired effect on you, and the glass slips from your grasp, shattering against the floor in a crash that mirrors the jump of your heart. You curse under your breath, stepping back from the mess, taking in the shards sprawled around your shoes.
âBe careful,â he says from the other side of the room, still dragging the furniture into place, and you scrutinize him over your shoulder, your brows knitted.
âI donât need your advice,â you murmur through gritted teeth as you crouch to pick up the larger shards. His attention returns to the couch, but you guess heâs not technically thinking how nice of a person you are.
As you kneel, your hands tremble slightly, and you wonder when that started. You fumble for a larger shard of glass, bracing your hand against the floor for balance, unaware of the smaller piece lying dangerously close to your fingers.
The sting comes fast, slicing through the skin of your pinky. You flinch, raising your hand, and Logan, hearing the faint wince, abandons his task and crosses the room to you.
"I donât need your advice," he echoes, mocking your tone as he squats beside you, his hand closing around yours to inspect the wound. "Youâre bleeding."
âBrilliant observation, Sherlock. I hadnât noticedââ The words die in your throat, your eyes widening as you take a closer look at his hand. âWait, why are you bleeding?â
He snorts, diverting his attention to his own hand. âWhat do you mean Iâmââ Whatever it is he intended to shoot back remains unsaid as both of you stare down at the small cut in his pinky.
Driven by instinct, you place your hands side by side, your finger grazing his. The cuts are identical: same place, same width, same depth. The only difference is his vanishes within seconds, leaving only a few droplets of crimson blood as evidence.
Logan couldnât have cut himself. He was nowhere near the glass. âAre youâŠ?â You swallow thickly, trying to string together a coherent thought, dizziness making its triumphant appearance. âAre you thinking what Iâm thinking?â
âYes.â
âAnd what is thatââ
âI need a drink.â
âCan you stop acting like a dick for one second?â You peer into his glossy eyes, watching him try to avoid your gaze, though he canât seem to resist. âPlease, Logan. Look at me.â
When he does, his mouth parts as if to speak, then closes again. âI donât understand. I thought I didnât have a soulmate.â His gruff tone slows even further, like he's straining to push the words from his lungs. âI thoughtâI thought I was alone.â
It explains so much: how your scars had reappeared once he and Wade returned from The Void.Â
The instant attraction, the yearning to be near him.
The dread that washed over you each time he walked away.
The dreams that plagued your nights, and the tightness in your chest these past few weeks that made you wonder if you could ever coexist in the same space as him without breaking apart.
All those times you felt he was getting closer werenât just a figment of your imaginationâhe was, in fact, right there.
But he wasnât just anyoneâit was him. Logan is your soulmate. You two are meant to be together. How long would it take for you to truly believe it? Until it no longer sounded like something too good to be true?
Without uttering a sound, Logan gazes at you, silently pleading to see them. To see your scars. You extend your arm, and with a gentle motion, he rolls up the sleeve of your shirt, revealing the marks etched into your skin.
He runs his fingers along the lines, trying to understand the bond you now shareâboth his and yours.
In a sense, youâre his. You carry his scars, the physical manifestation of the life he has lived. Even though he may not bear any of his own, you do, and thatâs more than enough.
He belongs to you just as much as you belong to him.
âThere are more,â you tell him. your voice barely above a whisper. He stands, offering you his hand, and you take it, rising to your feet. Logan inches closer, his mouth hovering just above yours, his large hand coming up to cup your cheek.
The look he gives you is one reserved for those he loves, a look filled with such warmth and affection that it almost feels dreamlike.
âDo you want me to see them?â he inquires, and all he needs is a nod from you to gently tug your shirt up your chest and over your head.
He lets out a dry chuckle when you attempt to tame your hair, the effort proving to be in vain. The clock on the wall seems to pause its ticking the moment his fingers begin to trail each of the scars that captures his gaze.
You canât even begin to fathom what thoughts might be swirling in his mind, but if the flicker of lust and desire you catch in his expression is anything to go by, youâre not so worried.
Loganâs touch carries an unexpected softness, a tenderness you never imagined a man like him could possess.
Deep down, you wish he understood that these scars donât hurt, that they never have. âIâm okay,â you reassure him, prompting him to explore more of your skin, to claim you as his.
âDo you⊠like them?â he asks without meeting your eyes.
Do you like my scars? is the real question hidden underneath.
Do you like me? is the one he canât bring himself to pronounce.
âTheyâre yours. I could never not like them.âÂ
Before you stands a man you once believed was meant to be your burden, your trial. Logan had been the earthquake sent to test your endurance, to see how much you could withstand before surrendering and waving the white flag.
The same fingers that once imprinted his mark on you now linger on the strap of your bra, waiting for you to decide whether to let him go further or stop.
Desire has a limit before it overwhelms. Thereâs only so much need a person can contain before it spills over, uncontrollable and raw.
This game, one you never learned how to play, feels as foreign to him as it does to youâneither of you knows the rules.
âCan I see more?â Heâs still talking about the scars, still fumbling with the strap, and you nod, your eyelids growing droopier as you take his free hand and direct it to the front of your jeans.
He catches the hint, undoing the button with ease, allowing you to shed the last layers of restraint.
Bare, moments away from being completely naked, standing in stark contrast to Logan, who remains fully clothed, your stomach does a flip as he rubs his thumb along the sides of your underwear.
Leaning your forehead against his shoulder, you stifle a sigh when he splays his hand across your lower back, pulling you closer.
His rough grip tightens on your ass, testing the feel of you, while your breathing becomes shallow, erratic.
âWhat is it, honey?â He slides his fingers your stomach, just below your belly button, brushing a small scar in there. âWant me to touch you?â
âYes,â you croak, the plea slipping out involuntarily, throwing your arms around his neck. He buries his face against your jaw, his lips parting against your skin, trailing open-mouthed kisses along the curve of your neck.
You tilt your head back, exposing more of your throat to him, breathless as you whisper: âIâve waited so long.â
He moves toward the couch, and you follow, trying to anticipate what heâs got planned for you. âI know, baby. I know. Youâve waited long enough.â Guiding your body down, he has you lying horizontally on the sofa. He unhooks your bra, kneading your breasts with both hands, eliciting a ragged gasp from you. âBut Iâm here now. You donât have to wait any longer,â he huffs by your ear, rolling your nipples between his fingers, his breath mingling with yours, each exhale warm and inviting. âGonna let me make you feel good? Show you how much Iâve been thinkinâ about you?â
Instead of answering with real words, you surge forward, crashing your lips against with his, reveling in the way he cages you with his biceps, locking you up in a prison of desire from which you never wish to break free. He tries not to settle his full weight on top of you, attentive not to crush you.
As he nips at the column of your throat, you squirm beneath him, canting your hips up to seek the friction you crave.
He presses his knee against your center and you push back, grinding against him with an animalistic urgency.
You canât recall ever feeling this desperate, this overwhelmed by a man. But then again, heâs unlike any other youâve encountered in your array of momentary hookups.
His kisses grow even more insistent as breathy moans roll off to your tongue, merging with the occasional creak of the couch beneath your movements.
Logan spreads your thighs wider, sinking to his knees on the floor to tug your lower half forward until your ass is almost hanging in the air. He places your thighs on his shoulders, supporting you as he leans in to pepper your soft flesh with kisses.
One can be certain that heâs marking your inner thighs with a hickey or two, the scratch of his beard feeling magnificent against your sensitive skin, and you can hardly bring yourself to think about the potential burn heâll leave behind. Logan inhales your scent, the tip of his nose dangerously close to your cunt, and you tangle a hand in his hair as he continues to test your patience.
âEager?â he wonders aloud, looking at you through his lashes. While maintaining eye contact, he presses a kiss to your clit through the fabric of your panties.
He does it again, and you bite your lip hard enough to draw blood, his fingers deftly pulling your underwear down your legs.
The first drag of his tongue along your folds has you scrunching your eyebrows in pleasure, tightening your grip on his hair. Logan moans against you, the sound muffled as he dips the tip of his tongue into your entrance, lapping at your arousal with an insatiable hunger.
The way you purr his nameâa soft caress, a pat on his back that says Yeah, youâre doing fineâonly spurs him on, infusing every one of his ministrations with fervor.
His longing for you radiates in the intensity of his touch, sending shivers through you, making you writhe because of his hands alone.
Your core throbs. Your skin prickles with electricity. Your legs quake on either side of his face. Heâs hungry and youâre his feast. Heâs parched and youâre the last bottle of water in an arid world.
Logan eats you out like this will be the only time heâll have the privilegeâeach movement calculated, pushing all the right buttons, pulling out every trick he knows to make you think No, it doesnât get any better than this. This is as much as one can get.
Then his fingers join the symphony of pleasure, pumping in and out of you as he keeps flicking your clit with expert precision, and your back arches from the couch, following his pace with your hips. He pushes back, you push forwardâhe pushes forward, you push back.
Who is enjoying this more: him or you?
His pointed tongue teases your bud, matched with the persistent hammering of his fingers plunged into your wet heat. The combination has you coming on his mouth, falling over the precipice while you struggle to keep yourself together.
Your walls flutter around his digits, and your cries fuse with his groans, both overshadowed by his insatiable desire to savor until the last drop of your release.
Shockwaves ripple through your body and you prop your weight on your arms to capture his lips in a fervent kiss, your eyes rolling rolling back in ecstasy as you taste yourself, a mix of sour and sweet.
In a frenzy, he sheds his clothes, practically tearing them away, and you wrap your hand around his length, stroking him in time with your kisses. Logan pulls back, panting against you, and you steal a glance at him.
Your gaze travels down to his hard cock, the tip a furious red, and he seizes your wrist.
âWhy donât you kiss it better?â he rasps, his voice dropping an octave. In this moment, youâre taken aback by his beauty, and the urge to express it rises within you.
âYouâre so beautiful,â you murmur against his thigh, showering his skin with heated kisses. You stare in disbelief at the trail of hair leading to his girth, mouth watering at the sight.
A kiss on the tip, followed by a broad lick along a prominent veinâLoganâs grip on the armrest tightens, his knuckles turning white. âSo perfect.â
âShut up,â he retorts breathlessly, but you revel in the strangled noise that escapes him as you take him deeper, his head disappearing between your lips. His palm rests on your nape, anchoring you in place. âGoddammit. The fuckinââmouth you have on you.â
You try to take him in further once youâre feeling more confident, while Logan fights with all his might against the need to thrust his hips up into your warmth. He canât stay still, grunting and smothering you with lavish praise that heightens your arousal, slick pouring out of you in waves.
âPretty thing you are. Donât even know how to function around you. You got me allâfuck, actinâ all stupid.â
At one point, he tells you to stop, because he doesnât want to come just yet. You know what comes next as he rubs his cock along your folds, blending your wetness with his precum.
Itâs sloppy, and dirty, and messyâand God, do you love it.
He sinks into you and the world collides in a way you never expected. Everything you thought you knew falls apart, leaving you stranded in unfamiliar territory.
You canât comprehend how youâve spent so many years without him. Without this.
Your lips find his, and he swallows every sound he punches out of your lungs. His thrusts grow harder and faster as you adjust to his size, how big he feels inside you.
He digs his fingers into the globes of your ass, yanking you towards his shaft every time he fucks into you. You feel the brush of his balls against your skin, the way his muscles flex beneath your touch.
To this day, itâs still hard for you to wrap your head around the fact that love is what humans both strive and die for.
You come to understand it fully as his eyes flicker to yours, checking for any signs of discomfort in your features.
You understand why people write books and songs about love when he breathes your name in the shell of your ear, chanting how good youâre taking him, how tight and wet you are for him.
You understand the place love occupies in your life as the sound of your bodies slapping together creates a melody which has never been played before.
You understand why youâve searched for this your entire life, lifting every carpet in hopes of uncovering the love youâve pined for.
In the past, it had always felt like a raceâfinding your soulmate before the clock struck twelve. Now that you have him, you wonder what the future holds for you, how this connection will evolve.
For now, you can allow yourself the possibility of relishing the drag of his cock in your interior. His pace doesnât falter for a secondâsomething about mutants and their non-stop stamina, no doubt. He shoves a hand between your sweaty bodies, rubbing circles on your already swollen bud.
Each time he fills you to the brim, you have to ground yourself, resisting the pull of an altered reality.
âSo full,â you blurt out, mewling with a specially hard thrust, a chocked sob lodged in your throat. âPlease, stay.â
It could mean many things: Please, keep fucking me. Please, donât leave after this. Please, remain by my side form this moment onward, because I donât know how to go on with my life now that Iâve experienced this closeness.
Whatever meaning he ascribes to your words is of little importance. He tightens his arms around you, kissing you deeply, tongue and teeth clashing as they compete to see who wins the battle. âNever. Iâm never lettinâ you go, yâhear me?â
Heat pools in your lower back, a coiling tension radiating through your limbs. âYouâre mine, princess. Canât afford to lose you now that I found you. Gonna remind you every day.â
His rambling pushes you over the edge, your dripping cunt spasming around him as you reach your climax, moaning his name against his shoulder. You cling to him, convulsing beneath his body, and he grinds his hips into yours, his chest rumbling as he growls.
âInside,â you mumble, extending your hand to press it to his waist. âNeed you inside me. Please, I want it so bad.â
Logan stutters against you, his forehead falling against your collarbone as he finishes with one powerful thrust, his cock pulsing warm ropes of come within your cunt. You clench around him, whining as he prolongs both your pleasure and his, milking the last drop of his seed. His voice is a constant murmur, filling every space in the room until he slumps against you.
Night has fallen. The cut on your pinky no longer stings. Your scars, after all, are still there, nestled against Loganâs unmarked skin. You caress his back, sighing contentedly as a wave of peace washes over you.
Youâve never felt this relaxed.
Logan grasps your chin and tilts it up, a subtle smirk tugging at his lips. âHey,â he mutters, his gaze roaming all over your face.
You cup his cheek, his rough stubble grazing your palm. âHey, stranger. Long time no see.â
A genuine laugh pierces through the silence. the kind he rarely allows himself. Crinkles form at the corners of his eyes, his brow furrowing as he glances at you with love.
Loveâhadnât you pondered its existence for so long? Your fuel for living, the muse behind your best poems, a recurring motif in your fantasies.
Love now has Loganâs name written in ink, no longer a blank canvas awaiting its unknown owner. Noâitâs all his now.
Youâd do it all over again if it meant ending up like this, tangled and intertwined, with the promise of a future together. He has many stories to shareâabout his past universe, about himself. You have secrets to unveil, too. Thereâs so much you both have yet to discover about each other.
But time isnât up. This isnât a race, you remind yourself: things are just getting started.
Everywhere you go, every place you attempt to set foot in, there it is. Love is dressed up in an expensive silk robe, a ribbon tied neatly on top of it. You reach closer, trying to unravel it, though it's pointless. The moment love sees youâtruly sees your longing for itâit flees, and you struggle to keep up. Love runs faster than anyone, hiding within the bushes, counting the seconds until its next appearance.
Finally, youâve wrapped love around your finger.
dividers by: @cafekitsune thank you!!! <3
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine#wolverine x you#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett xmen#logan howlett fic#logan howlett smut#logan howlett fanfiction#logan james howlett#james howlett#wolverine angst#wolverine fic#wolverine fanfiction#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan x reader#logan x you#logan xmen#wolverine xmen#wolverine x y/n#the worst logan x reader#the worst wolverine#worst wolverine#logan howlett x f!reader#james logan howlett#deadpool 3#the wolverine x reader
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SOMETHING HAPPENS AND I'M HEAD OVER HEELS - L.H.
Summary: What starts off as a simple favour to watch Lauraâs cat sends Logan into a spiral as you continue to make your way into his life.
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Female Reader
Warnings: Pure fluff - Logan is 100% whipped, Wade
A/N: 4.4k - my longest fic yet! Worst!Logan has my entire soul, I'd give anything just for that pretty smile. Title creds to Tears For Fears. Enjoy!
MASTERLIST
The familiar burn of whiskey stings the back of his throat. Logan rests his head against the couch, second-guessing his decision to babysit Laura's cat while she's enjoying her night out. Her tireless attempts of pestering him at last working in her favour so he can finally meet his 'copy-kitten' - her words.
A quick glance at the time reveals he should probably head out now. Logan rises, groaning as his muscles protest after weeks of just slumping around the apartment. Even Al had pointed out how lazy he'd become lately. And that unsolicited observation gave him half the mind to consider finding new roommates. But who was he kidding? As much as he also barely tolerated that one incredibly maddening little prick's incessant jibber-jabber, he wasn't going to find anything for what he's currently paying.
Soon enough, he weaves his way through the crowds, swerving past the shoulders of, frankly, one too many people absorbed by their devices to step aside for his large frame. Luckily, Laura's place isn't too far and he really appreciates that detail as the sound of thunder rumbles overhead. A faint ding emerges from his pocket and he retrieves his phone, reading the screen with a slight squint.
His boots soak the welcome mat as he fumbles with the door trim, locating the key according to Laura's text - making a mental note to remind her of personal safety later. Shivering, he shrugs the wet jacket off, tossing it over the armchair. His eyes dart around the room, looking for the damn cat, and for a moment, Logan wonders whether he's being pranked.
The pitter-patter of paws against the hardwood floor has him snapping his head to the little creature in question. The cat, or Leopold Alexis Elijah Walker Thomas Gareth Mountbatten - Leo, for short - he learns begrudgingly after Wade shoved pictures upon pictures to his face one particular day, stares at him with indifference.
Understanding the need to be left alone, Logan trudges towards the kitchen, swinging the fridge open. A small post-it stuck over a box of leftovers, reads "Knew you'd be hungry", has him scoffing, mildly amused that Laura had predicted his actions.
Minutes later, he sinks onto the couch, making brief eye contact with Leo, who's nonchalantly licking his paws. He's halfway through the bowl of pasta when the cat suddenly leaps onto the cushion next to him. Logan watches curiously, he's not terribly experienced around pets, hardly spending any time with Mary Puppins herself despite living under the same roof.
"Alright, here's the deal." He murmurs, "You stay outta my way and I stay outta yours."
Leo replies with a meow to which Logan nods, satisfied by the response. He hopes to god this cat has the same temperament as Dogpool and allows him to simply coexist till Laura returns. Intrigued by the smell, Leo slowly inches forward, gently nudging his head against the bowl.
"Don't think you can eat this, bub."
Leo seems to understand the implication and meows in defiance. With a sigh, Logan gingerly flexes his hand, stroking the cat's head. The act immediately has Leo purring in content, the desire to investigate the food long forgotten. And no one's there to witness the ghost of a smile that teases his lips.
The calm attitude only lasts an hour before Logan's biting back a string of profanities, frustrated by Leo's refusal to take his medication. He's thankful for his healing factor, for otherwise, he'd be covered in a litter of scars. How the hell Laura deals with this devil-of-a-cat is beyond comprehension.
There's no use in trying again. Leo clearly wants nothing to do with him or what he's hiding in his hand. The thought of seeking help crosses his mind, perhaps one of the neighbours is especially skilled in feeding pills to literal hellspawns. Logan tunes his hearing to the apartments on the floor. Old lady already asleep to her TV - no. A family of six attempting to eat dinner in peace - no. Two people about to - fuck no. Now he really wants a word with Laura about her living situation.
Just when he's about to give up, a recognisable melody reaches his ears - one he's unwilling heard Wade jam out to in the shower. This person swaying along to music seems far more approachable than anyone else in this building, and so he steps out, knocking on the apartment across from Laura's.
The door cracks open slightly, you peek your head out giving him a questioning look, âUm⊠hi? Can I help you?â
âHey, sorry to bother you. But, uh⊠Iâm watching Lauraâs - your neighbourâs cat.â Embarrassment creeps into his cheeks as he points behind him, âHeâs not takinâ his meds and uh do you⊠can you help me? Please?â
The look of absolute defeat paired with the remnants of red scratch marks on his arms has your heart clenching for this poor man, âOf course.â
When the door fully opens, Loganâs eyes widen reflexively at the state of your undress. Thereâs nothing evocative about it, yet he feels as though heâs intruding on an intimate side of you. One heâs definitely not privy to.
Your sheepish smile sends a wave of something indescribable through his body. He clears his throat, turning on his heel to lead you inside. Leo flicks his head up at the sound of footsteps, purring as if he hasnât been driving Logan insane for the past hour.
You knew Laura had rescued the little guy a while ago, having run into her in the hallway the night she brought him home. Every interaction youâve had presents him as the sweetest kitten in the world, so watching the distinct mark of dread on this strangerâs face has you stifling a laugh.
âWhat?â Logan asks, feeling a little self-conscious about the whole situation.
âNothing. Itâs just - Leoâs very friendly. Or at least, I thought so⊠what the hell did you do to piss him off?â You chuckle, kneeling a foot away.
âPiss him off? I was just tryinâ to give him the damn pills. Had no problem with me before that.â Loganâs fingers twitch as you approach the cat, wanting to protect you from the sharp claws the demon would surely attack you with.
Yet, to his astonishment, Leo innocently crawls into your outstretched arms. And Logan swears he saw a flicker of mockery come across the catâs eyes as he peers at him, relishing your comforting embrace.
âSee? Heâs a sweetheart.â
The fondness in your tone almost has him believing your words. In no time, Leoâs fully cooperating with your gentle requests, happily taking the medication as if itâs the tastiest thing in the world.
Logan learns three things that night. One, your name. Two, that you have some innate ability to charm everyone around you - human or otherwise. Three, he absolutely couldnât wait to see you again.
Logan tries to drain out the shouting match between his two roommates, ducking calmly as Alâs miscalculated spatula throw flies in his direction. Laura giggles next to him, entertained by the whole ordeal - Wade had accidentally left his cock ring plugged in the bathroom again, nearly short-circuiting the apartment.
âHey! Kink shaming is very frowned upon, Althea.â
âYou motherfucker! I almost got electrocuted by the toaster this morning!â
Logan grumbles to himself, knowing thereâll never be a quiet, normal day in this household. He turns to Laura, âKid, you wanna grab some food later?â
âCanât. Iâm going out.â
He nods, not giving it a second thought. But as the memory of you flashes across his mind, he stops bouncing his leg, heart beating a little faster. It had been a whopping seven days since that interaction, yet every little detail has stuck with him since. In fact, he spent many hours pacing in his room planning some way to magically run into you.
â⊠What about the cat?â He asks, and when she raises her eyebrow, âWhoâs watchinâ him?â
She replies with a shrug, âIâll figure it out.â
The solution to his problem falls perfectly onto his lap. Oh, how his pulse quickens at the thought. And as if to not seem suspiciously enthusiastic, he pauses before speaking, âI can do it.âÂ
âWhy?â
âBetter than this shit.â
Laura considers him for a moment then agrees casually - she knows exactly why he offered. You had bumped into her a couple of days ago, offhandedly mentioning meeting Logan that night as you recounted the details of your week. It took mere seconds to put two and two together and realise he was incredibly smitten.
Logan spends a good fifteen minutes messing with his hair. Fuck, did it always spike up like that? The one tiny mirror in his room supposedly taunting him with each look over. A low tsk breaks the flood of self-criticism as he slams the door shut behind him, roughly brushing past Wade.
"Ooh, is that cologne I smell or are you just horny to see me?"
His teasing spirit immediately drops when Logan shoots him a glare, precisely throwing Al's spatula straight at his crotch.
"God - not the home office, peanut! Jim and Pam need protection!"
The walk to Laura's seems a lot shorter this time, some sort of nervous, giddy energy surging through his chest with each step. Logan bites the insides of his cheeks, feeling childish by the stupid smile daring to grace his lips just at the sheer thought of you. He can't remember the last time someone had drawn these kind of emotions from him. A part of him wants to cower in fear of rejection and self-doubt, and other? Oh, it's got your name written all over.
As soon as he reaches the hallway, all his senses are directed to your apartment. Confused by the silence he finds instead, Logan strains his hearing harder than ever. Hm, it's barely seven-thirty, maybe you're not home yet? Disappointment twirls around his mind, he sighs before opening Laura's door, convincing himself it's probably for the better.
To his surprise, Leo behaves quite well this time around - eating his food, taking his medication, and sticking with minimal efforts to annoy him. The black and white movie he randomly chose keeps his thoughts from drifting to you for the most part, though he can't help but wonder where you are at - he checks his watch - 10:38 pm on a Thursday?
Whatever hope he held onto paints him a fool as time slips by. He couldn't blame you, you didn't owe him anything. Logan runs a hand down his face, and despite his wavering relationship with Leo, he's at least grateful for the cat's company on this rather lonely night.
"Was a dumb idea, huh?" He mumbles, gently scratching Leo's ear.
Not ten minutes later, the jingle of something hitting the floor has him sitting up, intrigued. Logan pads over to look through the peephole, his heart fluttering at the sight of you. It doesn't take a genius to note your drunken state with the way you're cursing and fumbling with the keys. His hand rests against the doorknob, a flash of hesitation creeping in. Do you even want to see him right now?
Before he can psych himself out, his instincts make the decision for him. Logan's unsure of how to announce his presence, wanting to avoid any chances of scaring you. In hindsight, that task shouldâve been deemed impossible when you flinch suddenly anyway.
"Logan! Shit - did I wake you up?"
He chuckles at that and before he can even respond, you fire off another question, "Wait, what're you doing here?"
"Laura's out. I'm on babysitting duty." Leo purrs from somewhere behind him in confirmation. Logan watches as you nod slowly, the keys once again sliding from your grasp, "Here, let me help you."
The two of you reach down, fingertips barely grazing as he reacts faster than you. He realises he's much closer than he anticipated when your perfume crowds his senses. Logan buries the urge to meet your eyes deep, deep down, instead unlocking the door with a clenched jaw.
He's very appreciative of the fact that you're too out of it to observe his actions. He wanders into the kitchen to fetch some water, a laugh nearly spilling out of him as you collapse onto the couch, "Hey, easy."
"I'm not that drunk."
"I believe you." He lifts the glass to your lips, words ever so soft, "But... how about we get you to bed hm? Doesn't that sound better than this couch?" When you blink at him tiredly, Logan knows it's so over for him - every shred of denial he held within now shattered by your very hands.
"Okay... "
He maintains some distance, assuming you'd stubbornly dismiss his attempts to guide you to the bedroom. Leaning by the doorframe, he doesn't try to hide the fondness in his expression as you settle under the covers.
"Night, Logan."
He hears you murmur beneath the blanket. It's almost natural how quickly he replies as if you've had this exchange hundreds of times before, "Good night, sweetheart."
A groan leaves you as the sunlight eventually breaches the comfort of your dark room. Rubbing your eyes, you blindly reach for the bedside table, hoping to find your phone. Instead, your hand retrieves a piece of paper while knocking over a bottle of Advil that definitely wasn't there earlier.
'Not that drunk' my ass. - L
The party hat lays tilted on his head. Logan hooks his finger onto the string, momentarily stopping it from cutting into his chin. On any other occasion, he wouldn't have been caught dead wearing the stupid thing, but it was Laura's birthday and once she pulled out the dangerous puppy eyes, there was no way he could refuse without being an asshole.
He's been leaning against the wall, thumb lightly tracing the rim of the beer bottle in his hand as he blankly stares around the room. Throughout the night, Logan's eyes impulsively shift in your direction, tuning into the conversations you're having with - what feels like - everyone but him.
Mary Puppins zooms by, stepping on his boots in the process. She must've caught a whiff of whatever Al's cooking. He bends down to pick up the stuffed Wolverine chew toy she dropped along the way, mildly concerned by the amount of slobber coating it.
"Nice hat."
Logan hears you chuckle behind him. He quickly turns around, tossing the toy somewhere far, far away before you could notice. And despite wishing all night for the opportunity to talk to you, he finds himself tongue-tied now that you're actually in front of him, awaiting his response with an amused expression. Get it together, dumbass.
"This thing? Well... it made the kid happy." He says, incapable of suppressing the smile that never fails to make an appearance whenever you're around.
The way your features soften releases a storm of arrows to his poor, old heart. Whatever anxiety he felt earlier increases tenfold, Logan takes a swig of his drink only to realise it's empty. With nothing to divert his energy to, he grips the bottle tighter, hoping the integrity of the glass is enough to withstand the force of his nerves.
"Thank you, by the way."
His eyebrows raise in confusion, "For what?"
"Few weeks ago. When I got home totally wasted." As your cheeks turn a little red at the memory, Logan wants to relive that moment over and over again.
"Oh... yeah." He huffs lightly, gaining a smidge of confidence from your flustered state. It gives him just enough courage to throw in a cheeky comment, "At your service."
He's mighty pleased when you giggle, biting his lip to control the proud smile aching to take over. Logan studies you briefly, and if he didn't know any better, you almost seemed nervous too? That possibility sends his mind reeling in excitement. Perhaps you also feel something here?
The shrieking sound of a party blower has him wincing, the plastic hits his cheek as Wade sneaks up right next to him with a wide grin, "Sugar bear! Don't mind me, I overheard you tell Yukio about your date tomorrow. Now, spill. Who is this mystery man and does he have a twin by any chance? Brother or sister - daddy's not picky."
Logan's initial reaction to harshly shove the man aside dies in an instant when you laugh rather bashfully at the question. He prays to god it's another one of Wade's fucking jokes. However, that hope flies out the window as you hesitantly ramble on about this guy. Excusing himself, he leaves the apartment, ripping the party hat off in agony - not witnessing the guilt eclipsing your emotions.
Droplets of sweat linger at the ends of his hair as he places the last of Laura's cardboard boxes on the floor of her new apartment. After weeks of mulling it over, she decided to move a little further away, complaining about how rent was becoming too crazy. Logan offered to support her financially till she was good on her own, yet she strongly refused just as he expected.
Since she was no longer your neighbour, the chances of running into you dwindled over time. He saw you in passing last month when he came over to help Laura with apartment hunting. The logical part of his brain convinced him to not stick around, desperately clinging to the idea that you're not interested. But catching your expression fall as he dismissed your presence nearly made him run back to wrangle you into his arms, to whisper apologies and beg for forgiveness.
After an especially tiring day, Logan returns home, crashing onto the couch with a sort of emptiness as he stares at the ceiling. Both his roommates are muttering in the corner, afraid to call out his incredibly irritable mood of late - instead, walking on eggshells whenever he's around. It seems that Wade loses the hushed argument, settling a good arm's length away from him.
"Peanut." He drags, slowly, "Al and I are... worried about you. As much as this brooding, tough guy act is really doing wonders for my sexual wellbeing, I just can't let you Debbie-Down-Pour all over this parade."
"The fuck you want me to do?"
"You need a one-way ticket to pound town-" He chirps, and when Logan grunts angrily, Wade shrieks, shielding himself from any incoming attacks, "Don't hurt me!"
The aroma of coffee tingles his senses as he takes an exaggerated sip, ignoring the need to continue such an aimless, one-sided conversation. Across the table is one of Vanessa's acquaintances, Karen or Kira - he can't remember - mindlessly explaining why her previous dates didn't work out. Logan forces a nod here and there, humming in pretend acknowledgement while he concocts some plan to seriously bash Wade's head against the nearest wall.
In all honesty, he didn't know how the hell that bastard persuaded him to entertain this woman for the night, making a note to check his alcohol for any suspicious substances later. What he did know was that this was going as terribly as he thought. And while he might be awfully rusty in terms of dating, Logan's certainly not oblivious to basic body language cues. Deciding twenty minutes of this torture is enough, she hastily rushes out the building and that's the last of Karen he ever sees.
The grocery bags feel like cinder blocks in your hands as you walk down the street. Mentally scolding yourself for postponing this chore till the last minute, you huff in exhaustion, adjusting your grip every few seconds. A woman nearly bumps into you on her way out, you stagger backwards, watching her storm off. Startled by her rashness, you turn to glance at where she came from, gasping when you spot a familiar face.
âLogan?â
He snaps up, recognising that particular voice - your name leaves his lips softly. Mixed emotions swirl around his mind, yet, he can't help the way his heart jumps as you fill his senses, âWha - whatâre you doin' here?â
âI was just passing by... saw you through the window.â Your gaze drops to the half-finished cup of coffee opposite him, âWere you on a date?â
âUh Wade - he...â Logan stutters for a moment, dumbfounded that you're even talking to him after his childish behaviour the last few weeks. He nods lightly as the unmistakable bullet of regret pierces his insides.
âItâs her loss anyway.â
God, he wants to apologise so badly. Your friendly attitude only serves to make him feel worse, but Logan thanks his lucky stars that you don't hate him. He definitely wouldn't have been able to handle any sign of resentment on your part - no matter how much he deserves it.
âWhatâs with the eggs?â
You laugh, looking down at the several cartons peeking through your bags, âIâm stress-baking.â
He's so lost in your eyes that it takes him a second to register your reply, nose scrunching in amusement, âStress-baking?â
âYes, itâs a perfectly valid activity.â
That draws a chuckle out of him. He raises his hands in defense, âI ainât judginâ, doll.â
A comfortable silence takes over and Logan realises just how happy he is to see you again - how much he's missed you all this time. He opens his mouth to spill something out of pure impulse when you beat him to the punch.
âWhy donât you join me?â
It doesn't take much convincing and he's already fallen into a steady pace as you walk together - his fingers effortlessly hooking onto all the grocery bags. His chest threatens to explode when you lean towards him, moving aside for people brushing by. Logan wills his entire strength to not drape his arm across your shoulders in an effort to keep you safe.
Time becomes irrelevant when you're around. The frequency of his own laughter shocks him at first, but he's not really thrown off by the joy you bring out of him because - well, of course, you do. It's safe to say that Logan can't bake to save his life, though he doesn't mind this particular weakness as you giggle at his dreadful attempts to mix the cookie dough. Shamelessly, he watches you come closer, breaking into a tangent about proper kneading techniques - if you ask him to repeat any of it, he'd be stumbling over his words like a fool.
Eventually, he makes something that somewhat resembles your example. He dips his finger into the dough and lifts a small piece in your direction, "How's this?"
When you gently grasp his hand to lick the sweet mixture straight off, he thinks he's trapped in some wild daydream. Logan stares at you in surprise, cheeks turning into a telltale shade of red. Your hums of approval fall onto deaf ears as he remains frozen, wondering how you're so quick to move on from that bold gesture.
Every little thing you do stains his mind - from the way you dance around to soft music playing in the background, the way you focus all your attention on him whenever he speaks, even the way you warn him about the oven as if he could get burned.
His expression must've turned serious by how you suddenly pause, peering at him in concern. Bearing a rush of emotions, the words pour out of his mouth without hesitation, "I am so sorry."
"I was an idiot and I... avoided you 'cause I couldn't deal with these damn feelings-"
He stops.
He's revealed way too much. And judging by your face, that was definitely a mistake. Logan shuts his mouth, jaw hardening as he fights something heavy crawling up his throat. His eyes land on the door and all he wants is to escape from this shrinking room.
A whisper of his name fractures the glass cage he's built up around his heart. His boots seem to be cemented to the floor, unwilling to break free even as you still in front of him - a mere breath away. Your hands rest against his cheeks, slowly turning his head so he's compelled to meet your tender gaze.
Not a single sound slips out of him before your lips are on his. His heart pounds in his chest, burning at sensation. Logan leans into the kiss, hands settling on your waist, holding you as close as he can. Relief washes over him, he tilts his head slightly to deepen his movements - his breath nearly giving out when you whimper softly.
The loud ding from the oven has you pulling back with a faint chuckle. Logan smiles too, letting out a sigh as he lays his forehead against your shoulder. He presses his lips to your collarbone, whispering against your skin, "Does that mean what I think it means?"
"The cookies... or us?"
He gently pokes your side at that comment, mirroring your dazed look. Between the quiet exchanges of laughter, he knows exactly what this means - what you mean to each other.
His muscles feel looser with each stride, embracing the breeze tangling with the warmth pooling inside from your touch moments ago. Logan makes his way home with a kind of ease he hasn't felt in forever, chewing on a cookie you insisted he taste.
As he walks through the door, Wade rests his chin on his hands, âSo⊠how did it go? I see youâre enjoying the post-bang baked goods.â
Logan rolls his eyes, not wanting his mood to be spoiled. He grumbles under his breath, your name accidentally slipping out.
"You ran into angel-reincarnate?" Wade gasps, "Oh. Finally putting that horse cock to good use." Clapping excitedly, he follows after Logan, "Wait a second, this fic is tagged fluff. There'll be no fucking on my watch, partner!"
Logan slams the door to his bedroom behind him, blocking out Wade's muffled chattering.
"She had you cosplay as Paul Hollywood all night? Goodness! The power she possesses. I must gain all her secrets."
"Fuck off."
Wade grins to himself, quickly pulling his phone out to shoot off a text.
Wade: Project-Wolvie-Gets-Pussy is a go!
Laura: We are NOT calling it that.
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sniff
pairing: worst!Logan x neighbor!reader word count: 3k summary: You catch Logan with your stolen panties. content/warnings: pervy old man Logan, panty sniffing, masturbation with panties, mutual masturbation, a whole lot of fantasizing, kinda sub!Logan a/n: Still deep in the trenches here, folks. The Logan brainrot has gotten out of hand. Thank you to @ozarkthedog for making me worse ilu đ
Logan was a bad man. He knew that. Had spent years knowing that.
Sure, heâd saved this universe, but he still had his demons.
The first time heâd crossed paths with you, youâd knocked him out. Youâre a pretty little thing, all sweet and soft. Thereâs no way youâd ever want a man like him, all anger and failure, grey in his hair, face lined with time and exhaustion.
But you were kind, and charming. Made him smile every time you saw him in the halls or in the laundry room.
He shouldnât. He knows he shouldnât. But when he sees you in your leggings and a tight little top, every curve on display, he just canât help it. He can't tear his eyes away.
Your ass jiggles as youâre bent over the washer, tossing your dirty laundry in the machine haphazardly, and you donât notice when you drop a lacy pair of panties.
He should tell you. He should really tell you.Â
Instead, though, he moves closer to you. Makes up some lie about this machine having been on the fritz. Gives the washer a little smack, the metal of the machine twanging against the metal of his bones.
And, as you thank him and turn back, he snatches up your lacy panties and slips them into his pocket.Â
âYou have a good day, now, sweetheart,â he tells you, and you turn to face him, a bright smile on your face.
âYou too, Logan! Iâll see you round.â
He makes a quick exit, cock already hardening, panties burning a hole in his pocket.
When he gets back to the apartment, he slams the door behind him hard enough to shake the doorframe. He slips into the bathroom, away (hopefully) from the prying ears of Wade and Al, double checking to make sure he has the lock latched securely. He thinks theyâre out. He hopes theyâre out. If theyâre not out, theyâd better not say shit if they hear him.
With a quick tug, he unbuckles his belt and unzips his jeans, letting his cock spring free from its confines. He slips the panties from his pocket and sighs. Theyâre barely more than a glorified shred of lace. He holds them up, examines them. Do you wear this style every day, a little thong like this, or is it only for special occasions? Maybe you were wearing them for someone else, some little boyfriend?
The thought enrages him. He knows itâs unfair, that your life is none of his business. Maybe you are dating someone. Thatâs fine. Youâre young and pretty and deserve someone good. Someone better than a man like him.
But fuck he would take care of you right. Wouldnât stop till you were shaking and crying, utterly fucked out and satisfied, covered in sweat, the slick of your release all over both of you.
With that thought, he brings the panties to his face.
He takes a deep sniff and groans.
He could smell them already, smell you, but it was different from a distance. With your panties in his face, he breathes deep, tries to take you in, all you, only you.
Itâs dizzying, the scent of you. The smell of your pussy is intoxicating and he wants so much more. He darts his tongue out, licking at the crusty gusset. He groans as he tastes you. The panties had been worn days ago, but as he sucks at them, he makes them wet again, slippery.
He fists himself with one hand, painfully hard to the point heâs dripping, and with the other, holds your underwear up to his mouth, soaking the fabric.
Then, he wraps the wet panties around his cock and starts jerking himself off.
God, he hopes no oneâs home. He tries to quiet the sounds coming out of him, but he simply canât. The feeling of your panties choking his dick is incredible, even better than heâd hoped when he nabbed them. His breaths are coming out in pants and growls, and he feels more like an animal than he has in a long, long time.
âFuck-â he grits, imagining all the things heâd like to do to you. He wants to taste you, straight from the source. Spread your pretty little pussy and spit, mixing saliva with your arousal. He wants to fold you over, shove your face into the pillow and ass in the air, all for him to smack and grope at. Spread your cheeks and thumb your asshole. Maybe youâve never taken a cock in the ass before, maybe he can be your first.
His mind swims with every filthy thought heâs ever had about you. He wants, he wants, he wantsâ
He wants to bite down on your inner thighs, leave bruises on that soft, soft skin. Plunge three fingers into your glistening pussy and take.
Logan can still taste you on his lips.Â
Itâs with that thought, and one more slick tug, and heâs spilling into your panties.
Thereâs a lot. More than he wouldâve expected. He keeps coming, the jerk of his hips punctuated with heavy breaths and growls, sweat dripping down his temples and brain blissfully blank from his exertions.
Fuck.
The post nut clarity starts to hit, slowly at first and then all at once.
FUCK.
He should not have done that.Â
Stealing your panties? Really? God, he really was just a perverted old man. You could never know, heâd have to find a way to slip them back in your hamper the next time you met doing laundry.
And despite that, despite the shame and guilt and absolute self loathing, he brings the wadded ball of panties to his mouth and licks one last tentative time, tasting both of you together on the flimsy lace.
It tastes like heaven.
Gingerly, he tucks his dick back into his jeans. Glances at himself in the mirror, and fusses a little, straightening out his disheveled appearance.
After one more look over himself, ruined panties balled up in his hand, he unlocks the bathroom door and steps out.Â
He exclaims when he sees you, smile on your face, reclined on the sofa next to Wade. Fuck these fucking walls had better be soundproof. FUCK.
âPeanut,â Wade sing-songs, âWe have company! This little morsel from down the hall was just telling me how sheâd run into you earlier today. She brought us some muffins.â
He puts undue emphasis on muffin in a way that makes Logan blush, just a little.
âJust had some bananas that were past their prime and I made too many. After I saw you earlier I thought I should drop some off as a thank you!â
âA thank you?â Logan asks, suddenly confused.
âYeah, for helping with the washer!â You frown, surprised that heâd already forgotten.
Logan hesitates to make eye contact, instead only grunting vaguely in your direction with a curt nod.
He shuffles over to the kitchen and grabs himself a beer. Much to his chagrin, the muffins do smell good.Â
Heâs not sure if you notice that heâs trying to ignore you, but you still seem cheerful.
âWell,â Wade sighs, âIâd better get going. I have a hot date tonight and I will not be late. Again. By more than fifteen minutes.â
âSay hi to Vanessa from me,â you tell him, and right as heâs standing you turn to him. âMind if I use your bathroom?â You ask, and Wade points you towards the door Logan had just exited.
âHave at it,â he says, and then in a stage whisper tells you, âBut if you die, Iâm not to be held responsible. Peanut was in there for a while and I can tell you from experience, a wolverine-dump is frightening to behold, even if itâs just the aftermath.â
You snort a laugh and move towards the bathroom as Wade tugs a particularly hideous hat on top of his heinous toupee. âPlay nice,â he mock-glares at Logan, âWe want more friends in this building who bring us delicious, delicious baked goods.â
With that, he slips out of the apartment.
Itâs then that Logan realizesâthe panties are no longer in his hand. Heâd dropped them. Heâd fucking dropped them!
Itâs so fucking stupid. So unbelievably fucking stupid. Heâd dropped the panties when he saw you, startled out of his train of thought.
And left them on the floor of the bathroom.
âNO!â Logan calls, and tries to get to the door before you make it there, but heâs already moments too late.
As he dashes around the kitchen island and towards the bathroom door, youâve already shut the door behind you. At the sound of his footsteps, the door swings back open, and youâre standing there, panties in hand.
He physically recoils and then stares, deer in headlights.
You look at the bunched up ball of underwear and back up at him.
âLogan?â you venture.
He glares at the floor, refusing to make eye contact. You can see the tick of his jaw, the dart of his eyes.
âAre these mine?â you ask, already knowing the answer.
Logan gives one sharp nod.
âYou seem to have made a mess of them,â you muse, suddenly feeling very, very warm. You should be angry. Hell, you should be scared.
But he stands before you, still looking at the floor, looking to all the world like a bashful child whoâs just been caught misbehaving.
He doesnât respond with words, only grunts.
You take a step closer to him.
âLogan, look at me.â
He finally does. Heâs not sure what he sees in your eyes, but it doesnât look like fear or anger. Instead, itâs almost a hunger.
âFirst," you tell him, "Youâre gonna clean up your mess,â You're suddenly more bold than you know yourself to be, aching with it. âAnd then youâre gonna show me, and youâre gonna do it all over again.â
âIâm sorry, whatââ
You take another step towards him, close enough to touch him. As heâs about to say something else, you take the opportunity to shove the cum-drenched panties right in his open mouth, shutting him up instantly.
He stands there, unmoving, panties half-dangling out his mouth.
âGood boy.â You say, and his eyes widen, mouth agape and panties nearly slipping.
Of all the scenarios heâs played out, for months now, this was never one of them.
Heâd never realized how much he can enjoy surprises. The hunger in your eyesâitâs delicious.
He regains a semblance of composure and you guide him backwards. He stumbles blindly till the backs of his knees hit the sofa. He collapses with a huff.
âGo on,â you encourage, âYou like playing with my panties so much, you get to do it for me.â
He groans, puts a hand to his mouth, and sucks at the fabric.Â
Itâs still wet, and full â full â of his cum.Â
He slurps at it, pulls them out of his mouth and stretches the panties wide. Licks all over it, tongue running along the gusset where he can still taste the two of you together.
It doesnât matter that Wade could come back home, that Althea may already be home. It doesnât matter that heâs mortified; at the very least, his dick doesnât seem to have gotten the message. Heâs getting hard again, refractory period already practically nonexistent. Heâs at a loss for words, but that doesnât matter, either.Â
All that matters is the panties in his mouth, and your eyes on him, slight smile tugging at your lips as you watch.
âDo you make a habit of this?â You ask, and itâs more curious than condemning.
Logan shakes his head. âUh-uh,â it comes out muffled through the mouthful.
âDonât make a habit of stealing my panties, or donât make a habit of stealing anyoneâs panties? For all I know, youâve got some secret collection. Got a pair of Wadeâs briefs in the back of your drawer?â
The blush that blooms is pretty, flushing all down his bared throat. You desperately want to touch him, but more than that, you want to tease him. Humiliate him. Call him a dirty old man and make him sweat, and then show him that you want him anyway. That you have been wanting him.
You just didnât think heâd fall so easily for the bait of dropped panties.
âSuck em clean,â you tell him, and he makes a half-strangled moan, slurping loudly against them.
He works at them with his mouth. It couldâve been comical but instead he simply looks feral. He makes a lewd, wet sound, and pulls the panties out of his mouth, dragging them across his teeth, saving every last bit of the mix of cum and reconstituted pussy juice that had been soaking them.
You take them from his outstretched hand and sniff them yourself. You see the way his eyes widen again, but heâs restrained. He holds himself back, stays still.
âIâve gotta say, you do put on a good show. You can keep these,â you smile, and toss them back at him, smacking him square in the face.
âBut these-â you slip your thumbs up your skirt, the one you deliberately chose to wear just for this purpose. You hook the waistband of todayâs panties and slip them down, stepping out of them and handing them to Logan.
âYouâre gonna show me exactly how you touched yourself with those panties you stole.â
âHey,â he huffs, âLook, Iâm sorry, I shouldnât haveââ
âIâm not,â you cut in, âIf you hadnât stolen my panties, you wouldnât be showing me just how dirty an old man you are.â You wink, âAnd I like it.â
âWatch who youâre callinâ old, sweetheart.â
âLogan, baby,â you croon, âYou ainât the one calling the shots here.â
He opens his mouth to reply, but you take another step towards him and grab him by the belt buckle. He buffers, opening and closing his mouth several times, never taking his eyes from your face.
He watches, awed, as you undo the buckle, pop the button, pull down his zipper.
You grin when you see he isnât wearing any underwear himself and, with a swift, deft movement, you reach into his jeans and slide out his cock.
If he wasnât hard before, he is now. He moans as your hand wraps around him, pumping gently. Itâs far too little pressure. He wants more. He needs more.
As if reading his mind, you snatch your panties from his hand and wrap them around his cock.
He whines, immediately overwhelmed. Heâd barely dared to notice them when youâd placed them in his hand. Now, he realizes just how absolutely soaked you are. The crotch of your panties, (another lacy pair), is slick with your arousal.
âShow me,â you tell him. âShow me-â
Reluctantly, he tightens the grip on his cock and starts jerking himself.Â
Against his own will, a ragged moan slips out. It makes your body hot and your pussy even wetter. You sit back on the sofa and spread your legs, letting your hand rest on your needy pussy.
Logan notices and, encouraged, wraps his fist tighter around his cock and strokes himself faster, his hips moving rhythmically.
You start to touch yourself in earnest, dipping two fingertips into your slick heat and swirling the arousal around your clit.
Little moans start to escape you, egged on but his ragged breathing. He starts muttering, worn and desperate; âFuck, fuck, wanna taste that pussy. Eat you right. Smells so good, tastes so good, wanna make you cum on my tongue, hold you down, fuck you through itââ
The touch of your fingertips is exquisite. Youâve masturbated to the thought of him a lot. More than youâd prefer to admit. But seeing him like this, undone and aching, it hits you all the more.Â
You sink into the fantasy. âWant you, Logan. Iâve wanted you for so long.â
âGettinâ close now,â he warns. He should be embarrassed at the speed he's reaching his peak, but he's so drunk on sensation he simply cannot find it in himself to care.
You nod, and adjust the pressure on your clit.
âWait for me,â you tell him. He groans, but nods. âNearly there,â you assure.
You press tight circles around your clit working yourself up, closer and closer and closer to that highâ
âFuck,â you shout, suddenly overwhelmed by it, âFuck, Iâmâ Iâm coming. Show me, Lo, show meââ
You tip over the edge, cunt pulsing hungrily. You wish youâd had something inside you. Wish youâd had him inside you.
He lets out a ragged groan, followed by curses, and the most explosive ejaculation youâve ever seen. The head of his cock is buried in your panties and he fills them, but his cum shoots out of the holes of the lace, spraying his spend across the floor and towards you. A single drop hits your cheek, and you nearly laugh, but the sound he makesâsomething primal and animalisticâsends another pulse through you and suddenly youâre coming again, untouched.
It takes a while to come down.
Heâs panting, sweat dripping down his temples. Reality absolutely living up to the fantasy.
When you both catch your breath, you smile, sated and tired. You reach out a hand and, hesitantly, he hands you the ruined panties.
Mouth agape, he watches as you run a finger through the cum and dip it in your mouth, humming a pleased affirmation. Then, you step into the cum-drenched underwear and put them on.
He stares at you dumbfounded, burning with so many thoughts that he canât pinpoint a single one.
âNext time,â you smile, standing up and pressing an unexpected kiss to his cheek. âYou can just ask.â
You wink, half dazed yourself, barely able to believe everything had turned out exactly as youâd orchestrated it.
âIâm in Apartment 8,â you tell him, and then youâve turned on your heel and stepped out the door.
Logan stands there, bewildered. He fingers the damp panties he still has in his pocket, and listens as your footsteps echo through the hallway.
#sorry folks i will not apologise for my use of the word âcrustyâ#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#logan howlett x you#wolverine smut#james logan howlett x reader#xmen x reader#logan howlett x f!reader#logan x reader#logan x f!reader#logan x fem!reader#logan howlett smut#worst logan#worst wolverine
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in every lifetime
summary: you lost logan in this universe. logan lost you in his. what happens when you both see each other again, but realize that you're both from different worlds? pairing: logan howlett x fem!reader warnings: post deadpool & wolverine ("worst" logan!variant), angst (mentions of death, loss from both reader and logan), no use of y/n. word count: 2.1k a/n: this is my first logan fic, so if anything is ooc, i'm sorry in advanced! just like everyone else, i've been obsessed with hugh jackman / logan after watching deadpool & wolverine (if it isn't obvious lol)... i had the song 'unchained melody' in mind when writing this story because whenever i hear it, i think of logan for some reason lol (tried to embed it but it didn't work, but i'd highly recommend listening to the song while reading this!) anyway, hope you enjoy! next part.
âIâll be back.â
âBut what ifââ
âI always come back, bub.â Loganâs looking down at you, hand cupping your cheek. In moments like this, you can see the age in his features. The crows feet at the corners of his eyes. The gray in his hair and beard.Â
âLoganâŠâ Tears sting your eyes. You know he has to leave, has to go help Charles, but thereâs a feeling deep in your gut that knows that if he goes, he isn't coming back.Â
âWait for me, then.â He says, dipping down to gently peck your lips. âOkay? Wait for me.âÂ
âLogan,â you repeat. âWhat do I do if Iâ if I lose you?âÂ
Thereâs a feeling in the pit of Loganâs stomach, a sense of dread and fear that heâs only ever felt when you were concerned. This feels a lot like a goodbye⊠That maybe if he does go, he wonât come back. And the thought alone scares him. He never used to have to think about the possibility of dying, his regenerative powers always healing him in record time, but he knows that he doesnât heal as quickly as before. He feels more pain now than he ever had. And he knows heâs sick, knows that the adamantium that once gave him strength is now slowly making him weaker.
But now, the thought of dying⊠It fucking scared him. It scared him to think that heâd leave you here, all alone, grieving him. He had never thought heâd be deserving of someone like you, to be loved and taken care of so gently, so sweetly, so patiently. Even with all of the baggage he carried, you never pushed. He knew, right off the bat, that you deserved someone so much better than him, but you stayed.Â
Through it all, you stayed.Â
And Logan would forever be grateful. After everything heâs been through, the things heâs seen, the things he had to do, the people heâs lost, you gave him a life that was finally worth living.Â
âThen, you move on, darlinâ.â Logan finally answers.Â
âAnd if I canât?âÂ
âYouâll have to.âÂ
âI donât⊠I donât want you to go, but I know that you have to. Charles needs you andââ
âI love you with every fiber of my being, baby,â Logan interjects. âAnd I will love you in every lifetime.âÂ
And that was almost a year ago. The moment he stopped calling, you knew that was it. That he either got into some real trouble or⊠Or that he was no longer here. It wasnât until a young girl named Laura showed up on your doorstep, holding his dog tags that your assumptions were correct.Â
You had fallen to your knees, a sob escaping your lips, as you felt your world come crashing down. Loganâs death had left a gaping hole in your heart, in your life, and everywhere you looked and everywhere you went, all you could see was him.Â
You learned from Laura that during his last moments, he had told her to come and find you, that you would take care of her and give her a good life. Whenever you were around her, you tried to be strong, tried to put on a brave front, but behind closed doors, you were a complete mess. There were days where you didnât want to get out of bed, didnât want to eat; you just wanted the pain to stop. Every night, whenever you closed your eyes, you forced yourself to sleep because that was the only place where you could be with him.Â
In your dreams, he was alive.Â
In your dreams, he had made it back home.
In your dreams, he was here with you, helping raise Laura.Â
And every time you woke up, you were welcomed with the sudden reality that he wasnât alive. He wasnât coming back home. He wasnât ever going to be here with you to help raise Laura.Â
Logan was dead and now, you had to try and learn how to move on.Â
For yourself.
For Laura.
For Logan.Â
â
He didnât know what he was doing here, why he agreed to stay with Wade because it was driving him crazy. This wasnât even his timeline; he wasnât even meant to be here. Despite saving Wadeâs timeline, Logan still found it hard to fit in. He tried to keep Wade and every single one of his friends at an arm's distance because he knows what happens to people he cares about.Â
But the more time he spent around them, the more he felt at ease. Logan would be lying if he said he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, but when Laura mentioned your name at one of Wadeâs family dinners, his heart skipped a beat. When he realized he would be able to stay in this timeline, you were all he could think about.Â
Logan wondered if you existed in this world and what he would do if you did. So, when Laura casually said your name, his head turned around so quickly that he felt dizzy. There were so many things he regretted in his own timeline, but you were his biggest regret.Â
Just like he failed the other X-men, Logan had failed you too. You had been there with the other X-men, trying to warn them of a planned attack and ended up getting caught in the crossfire. You had called out for him, just like Scott, like Charles, like Storm.Â
He managed to get to you before you had taken your last breath, holding you in his arms. Logan begged and begged for you to fight, that heâd do things right from now on as long as you just held on, but you were losing so much blood and Logan couldnât stop it.Â
Even then, when you had every right to be angry with him, you gazed up at him with an understanding look on your face. You had always been so patient and kind, so sweet and considerate. You had made him so happy and it scared him, which ultimately ended in pushing you away because he didnât think he was deserving of it. Of you.Â
âI love you, Logan,â you had said, wincing at the pain.Â
âIâm sorry, Iâm sorry, Iâmââ Logan felt a sob catch in his throat, tears stinging his eyes as he looked down at you. âPlease, baby, please please please, donâtââ
âIââ you coughed, eyes fluttering as you felt the pain overcome your entire body. âI will love you in every lifetime, Logan.â And then, you took your last breath, eyes falling shut and body falling limp in his arms.Â
Since then, Logan drank himself day after day, from dawn to dusk. The alcohol never truly helped, his regenerative powers sobering him so fast, but with every swig of liquor, it burned. And he spent years bringing pain unto others, including himself.Â
That was, until he met Wade who had given him a chance, a reason to fight for something⊠To not turn his back on someone who relied on him. A chance for redemption, to finally make things right.Â
âSo, will you meet her?â Laura asks, holding Dogpool in her arms as she gazes up at Logan. âSheâ She used to be with this universeâs Logan andâŠâ
âNo chance, kid.â Logan interrupts, shaking his head. âIâm not him.âÂ
âDid you have someone like her in yours?â she asks. âSheâs always put me first, always made sure I was taken care of even when she didnât have to, when she was grieving. And I thinkââ Laura sighs. âI think if she knows that some version of you is alive, it would make her real happy.â
âIâm not him,â Logan growls, feeling his irritation spike. ââSides, sheâs better off without me.â He stands from the table and walks out into Wadeâs balcony to get some fresh air, shutting the door behind him as he leans against the railing.
âBut sheâs coming tonight,â Laura finally says, long after Loganâs walked away.
Throughout the rest of the dinner, Logan remains outside. He can hear the muffled laughter coming from inside and it only angered him because it was just another confirmation that he didnât belong here. Heâs already on his fourth bottle of beer when he hears a familiar voice, smells a recognizable scent. He turns slightly and catches you stepping into Wadeâs apartment, an arm slinging over Lauraâs shoulders so casually, so maternally.Â
He feels his heart rate pick up. Your smile still lights up a room and he canât help but his lips turning upwards at the sight. With his enhanced hearing, Logan can hear your voice and he shuts his eyes for a moment, tuning all of his attention on you until youâre the only one he hears.Â
Then, he hears your laugh and he lets out a sigh. He never thought heâd be able to hear that again, but his eyes shoot open when he hears you say his name. Thereâs a shocked tone in your voice, laced with sadness and hope. It all but crushes him because he knows that youâre probably expecting someone else, expecting this worldâs Logan and he doesnât want to disappoint you. Not again. He doesnât think heâd be able to handle it if he were to hurt you again.Â
But when he looks at you, his breath catches in his throat when your eyes meet his. Logan notices the surprise look on your face, but before he could try and escape, youâre already walking towards him. When you open the door and step out with him, your scent fills his senses and it makes him dizzy, like he canât fully concentrate.Â
âYouâŠâ he hears you say, voice unsteady. âYouâre not⊠Iâmââ you sigh and shake your head.Â
âI know who you are,â Logan finally says, his own voice shaky.Â
Your hands reach out for him, but stopping halfway when you realize this isnât your Logan. This is not the same man who died all those years ago. This is some version of him â much younger, less wrinkles and gray hairs in his hair and beard, but he still has that same look on his face. The scowl.Â
âFrom Laura?â you ask hesitantly.Â
âFrom my universe,â Logan answers.Â
âThereâ Thereâs a version of me in your universe?âÂ
âThere was.â
âAnd what happened to me?âÂ
Loganâs jaw tightens. âThe same thing that happened to your Logan in this universe.â
âOh.â Your face drops, eyes softening. âIâm sorry,â you whisper.Â
Logan wants to run far from here, far from you because he feels himself yearning for more. He almost forgot how it felt like to be near you, to be inches away that he can just reach out and pull you into his arms. Your eyes captivate him, the kindness it expresses makes him feel like he matters. You had always made him feel that way that even through all of his anger, through all of the walls he put up, you showed him that he was deserving of something good. Even if he didnât believe it himself.Â
And you⊠You were the best thing to ever happen to him.
âDonât know why youâre apologizinâ,â Logan mutters.Â
Thereâs an uncomfortable silence that engulfs the both of you. He can see the tears threatening to spill over, can see the way your lower lip is beginning to tremble and he has this sudden urge to console you, to wipe away the tears that have now fallen down your cheeks.Â
âIâm sorry,â you repeat, bringing your hands up to wipe away the tears that seem to be trickling down your face nonstop. âI justâ Losing my Logan just crushed me and I donât think Iâve ever recovered.âÂ
My Logan.Â
Logan can practically feel his heart beating in his chest. This isnât a conversation that he thought he would be having and certainly not with someone he loved and died because of him.Â
âThatâs okay,â Logan responds quietly, his tone softening. âI donât think itâs easy to recover from losing someone you love.â
âDid youâ Did you love me in your universe?âÂ
Logan nods slowly, tightening his jaw as he gazes down at you. âWith every fiber of my being.âÂ
Your eyes widen and stare up at him. This might be a different Logan, but hearing those words again just brings you back to the moment you last saw your Logan before he left to go take care of Charles.Â
âDid you love me in yours?â Logan asks hesitantly.
You nod instantly, tears trickling down your cheek as you stare up at him. âIâd love you in every lifetime.âÂ
Logan feels his own set of tears pool at the corners of his eyes and he moves a hand to rest on the railing, fingers lightly brushing against yours as he stares into your eyes.Â
âIâm not him,â he whispers.Â
âI know,â you say quietly. âAnd Iâm not her.âÂ
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Logan howlett x fem!reader
CW: smut | unprotected sex | fluff | praising | Soft logan | dominant logan | oral (male and female receiving) | light spanking | light choking | spitting |
Word Count: 2.6k
Authors note: Hi, please be kind and show support. I got a little carried away with the smut part. Oops. Not proofread again. I'm sorry if there are any mistakes. My requests are open.
Divider by @saradika-graphics
My work will always be 18+ Minors do not interact.
Logan and casual dominance just came natural. You had to get used to it at first. You never really had someone take care of you the way he did. It was always the little things that showed you that he really did love you.
Pours your coffee for you while you hold out your mug.
Enjoys cooking and even feeding it to you. Especially breakfast because he knows you're very tired to do anything at all early in the morning.
Cooking together, and it's really him giving you the easiest tasks. "Wash the vegetables for me, will ya?"
"Be a good girl for me and hand me the butcher knife."
"Let me do that for ya" is what you'll hear a thousand times a day
When you're out in public, logan loves putting his hand on the small of your back and guides you around.
While you're getting ready for a date night together, logan absolutely loves getting kneeling to help put your heels on and then brushing his fingers up your leg to tease you. Maybe he'll give the inside of your thigh a little kiss, too. You constantly tell him you can do that yourself, but if it was up to him, you'd never have to lift a finger to do anything.
If you're at a restaurant, he'll order for you because he knows sometimes you get a little flustered and nervous. "It's okay. I'll tell'em what ya want, don't worry." He'll reassure with a smirk as he winks at you.
He likes to keep an extra cardigan of yours in his truck just in case it gets cold later on if you're still out together. He'll wrap you up in it and hug you to his body for extra warmth even if you tell him you're fine.
Hand on your thigh while he's driving at all times.
Logan always opens doors for you. When you're getting out of the car, he's running over to help you out. He'll even put his hand between your legs to prevent you from accidentally flashing anyone your underwear if you decided to wear a dress that day. Once you're out, he'll look you over and help fix your clothes and the bottom of your dress down just in case anything you didn't want showing was.
"That a new dress? Looks pretty on you."
He loves holding you close to him by your waist. He's always touching you and looking behind him to make sure you're right there.
If you're trying to reach something from the kitchen cabinet, he'll come up behind you and get it. His body pressed to your back. He loves the way you look up at him while you wait for him to hand you whatever it was you were struggling to get down.
Logan will give the top of your head a little kiss and pat your ass softly. "Here you go, baby, next time, jus' call for me."
You always got butterflies in your stomach when he did that.
"Come sit in my lap." he'll gently command you after he planned a movie for you and him to watch.
He'll rub soft circles on your hip. Your head resting on his shoulder as you both relax in eachothers embrace. Everything felt serene and calm. That was a feeling logan was never used to, but he never stopped chasing after it.
When you're not sitting in his lap and instead lounging on the couch with him as you're reading a book. Logan will have one of your ankles in his hand and softly stroke your skin absentmindedly.
Backs you up against a wall just to kiss your cheek.
Washing your hair in the shower and wants to rub your lotion on after he gets you dried off. It's not even in sexual but it always feels so intimate.
Loves to help you get dressed for bed. He'll grab on one of his t-shirts and a makeup wipe to get you ready for sleep. He'll pull back the blanket and tuck you in right next to him, with you being the little spoon.
Will lay naked with you in bed and kiss you from head to toe. Once again, it is always sexual but more tender and intimate. Sometimes, it doesn't even lead to sex. He'll hold you until you fall asleep on his chest.
Whispers how much he loves you while you're sleeping.
Logan isn't controlling even though sometimes you may feel like he is. You only felt that way if he on the rare occasion tells you no.
The only times he ever tells you no if is you want to go out alone somewhere at night. He'll drive you there and wait outside while you go have some fun with your friends. He's definitely not letting you go out alone, and he has no way of protecting you in case something were to happen. Logan has lost way too many people in his life. He's got lots of enemies. Any one of them could pop up at any moment.
â NSFW â
When he's fucking you it's a little more intense.
He loves having you ride him even though he knows you struggle to take him that way.
"You need some help, huh? My sweet girl can't do it by herself? " His large hands hold your waist to help bounce you on his cock.
"Grab onto the headboard, and I'll do the rest."
"So good, my good girl." He breathed as you whimpered. He'll thrust his hips up to meet yours. His swollen tip almost hitting at your cervix.
You felt one of his hands leaving your waist to travel up between the valley of your breasts before wrapping around your throat. Logan never squeezed down enough too roughly.
You never understood how he could be so rough and gentle with you at the same time. He's choking you but whispering in your ear, calling you his "good girl." And how perfect you are." He's peppering kisses all along your face. Spitting in your mouth while driving his cock hard and deep in your pussy.
Or when he's got you on your knees sucking him off.
"Slowly," his voice would get serious, but his hand would come down to caress your check.
Logan will always give you that lovingly look before pushing your head down all the way your nose was buried in the soft curls above his cock. Your eyes are watery with tears as you gag when he hits the back of your throat. Your makeup is all smeared, and all logan thinks as he's looking down at you, and you're looking up at him is how lucky he is to have you.
"Your throat feels so amazing. You always look so beautiful like this. Mouth full with your pretty eyes lookin' up at me."
After he cums he'll gentle pull his cock from your mouth. He bends down to give your lips a sweet kiss before squeezing your cheeks to open your mouth back up. He wants to see if you swallowed every drop he gave you. He knew you did. You always swallowed every bit of cum he released your on tongue.
Logan is obsessed with having you on all fours at the edge of the bed. Your ass up high, and your face smashed into a pillow. His face buried in your cunt from behind. His nose tickling and prodding at your entrance while his tongue flicks over your clit. His soft lips wrapped around to gently suckle on your aching bud. His hands on both of your hips, keeping you firmly in place. Every once in a while, he'll spank you to keep you focused. Not too hard. But hard enough to make you yelp.
"Aw, does this position embarrass you?" He cooed at you.
You'll nod because it does.
"Tch tch, that's just too bad."
You always felt so exposed like that, but you knew it was logans favorite position to have you in. He could do literally whatever he wanted. You tried to hide your face from him, and he'd spank you even harder for that. He wants to peak over and see your face twisting in pleasure. He wants to see your mouth open and drool all over your chin.
"Does my tongue feel good?" He mumbled against your cunt. His tongue now circling the edge of your opening.
"Good because I'm gonna fuck ya with it before I give you my dick" He growled from behind.
As he continued to tease at your entrance, he'll spit on it and use the pads of his fingers to rub it all over your dripping pussy â showing a little more attention to your clit. While he tongue slowly pushes inside you. He knows he's got you right where he wants you when he hears that little gasp you make followed by a moan. And how you seem to back up against him for more.
Your eyes close, and you grip at the bedding. All that embarrassment you were feeling was slowly fading away as logan sunk his tongue deep inside your pussy. His warm tongue moved and lapped up the mess you were creating on his mouth. He hears you whine and can feel your walls contracting around his wet muscle. He knew you were holding back your release until he said it was okay to let go. You were so perfect, too good to be true. He couldn't deny you.
"be a good girl and cum for me. I want you to."
After you cum hard to the point you're body is trembling. He'll come up and lean over your back, soothing his hand down your spine. " "shh shh, It's okay. I got ya. You did so well for me."
He won't stop talking you through your orgasm until he knows you're alright.
"Breath for me." Logan nuzzled the side of your face.
"There she is, there's my girl." He running his hand up and down your back, trying his best to relax you.
His voice was low and husky in your ear. He helped bring you back down to earth; sensing you were getting a little lost there for a second.
Once you're completely calmed down, he'll gently move you to lay on your back. Your legs dangling over the edge of the bed with him standing between them. His cock fisted in his hand as he slaps his leaking tip on your over stimulated clit. He loves to rub his precum all over that aching bundle of nerves he had been bullying all night. Your pussy glistening from your orgasm mixed with his spit. The messier he made you, the harder it seemed he got.
Logan loves watching your body twitch and hear those soft moans escape your lips. He takes forever to bury himself in you. He wants to see you lose control until you're a blabbering mess of empty promises. Promises you'll blurt out just to feel the head of his cock brush against your opening. Your juices dripping down to the curve of your ass and he licks his lips, wanting another taste. Logan would get you so worked up to the point that it was as if you believed he wasn't going to give you what you wanted.
"You gotta calm down." He coaxed you.
"You're making promises you can't keep right now, honey. I need you to relax. You really think I'm doing all of this to not fuck you?
He reassured you and ran his cock between your wet folds, spreading them apart. his tip nudging at your clit once more, making you bit down on your lip. Your hands stopped tugging at the bedding to reach out for him. You hissed at the sensation as your eyes filled with more tears.
"Move your legs up and hold the back of your thighs for me. Can ya do that?" Logan now commanded you.
All you could do was rapidly nod and do as you're told with your hands firmly gripping the back of your thighs â to keep your legs spread and pussy on display for him.
"Logan, I need you." You tried desperately to plead with him. You both had beads of sweat dripping down your body. Your head felt dizzy, and your chest was rising and falling faster.
Logan arched a brow at you. His way of asking if it was okay to finally split you open around himself.
"I-im okay." You stammered as you looked up at him. "I promise....m'ready."
His gaze softened as he slowly pushed his thick cock inside you. Both of you sigh in relief. Your walls hugged him so tight while he continued to push until he was completely buried all the way in you. He stilled for a few seconds to help you adjust.
"Fuck you're wet." He noted with his cock gliding in your pussy with ease.
Once he was fully inside and you were well adjusted, he didn't hold back. He began pumping in and out of you hard and fast. Your tits bounced as he picked up the pace. Your body was making the most vulgar wet sounds that seemed to only spur him on. Your moans grew needier and louder. You struggled to keep hold of your legs. Logan took notice of that and placed his hands on top of yours to help you.
"There we go, that better?" He bent forward a little more to whisper.
"Gettin close Lo," you whined, biting down hard on your lip.
"I know I can feel it." Logan loved when you warned him about your orgasm as if he couldn't feel your walls squeezing his cock tighter the closer you got.
Every thrust he gave, he hit your g-spot, making you lose your train of thought. A few more strokes, and you're cuming again more intensly than the last time. You're mewling and calling out his name. Your back arching off the bed but logan doesn't slow down. If anything, he seems to be going faster. Until he's spilling his cum all over your sensitive walls, as he milks himself inside you.
"You alright? Let me clean you up. Come on." He finally spoke up, out of breath as you laid there completely fucked out. But you managed to weakly nod your head yes.
"Can you walk?" He asked, you felt him gently pulling out and his eyes glanced from your face to where his cum was now dripping from your pussy.
You tried not to get embarrassed as his gaze seemed to focus on the mess he created between your legs.
Logan fought the urge to lick it clean from you. Or shove his fingers in your cunt to prevent anymore of his cum from spilling out.
When you didn't answer him again, he gave you that knowing look and arched his brow. Normally, he'd tell you to use your words, but he knew sometimes it was too hard for you to do.
You quickly shook your head. Obviously, you can't walk. You can't even feel your legs. He lets out a breathy laugh. "You'll do anything to get me to carry, huh?"
You gave him a small smile and tried to sit up.
He pretends like he's seriously complaining, but truth be told, all he wants to do is carry you. All day, every day, if you'd let him. He picks you up bridal style, carrying you into the bathroom where he sets you down at the end of the tub.
"We're gonna get cleaned up. I'll make you some food and then we can watch TV." He doesn't ask for anything in return, just that you be near him.
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The Accident
MAIN MASTERLISTÂ /Â MARVEL MASTERLIST
Logan Howlett x Female!Reader
Word Count:Â 3,170ish
Summary:Â Logan seems to always be there to rescue you.
Warnings:Â injuries, car accident
Notes:Â I completely made this up the other day. I hope people enjoy it.
Your shoes felt like they were weighing you down with each step you made up the staircase. Why the hell was your apartment on the fourth floor, and why the hell did you keep taking the closing shifts at the bar? Ready to pass out, you finally made it to your floor and slowly made your way down the hall. Your eyes glanced at your neighborâs door as you walked past, hoping to hear the deep voice of your crush. It was silly since it was past midnight, but you had learned quickly upon moving in that your neighbors seemed not to care what hour they were yelling at.
When you reached your door, you leaned against it with a sigh. Digging through your purse sounded like a chore right now. Slowly, you slid down the door and sat on your mat. Your head fell back against the door with a soft thud, eyes closing.
You donât know how long you were like that before the sound of heavy boots pulled you from your quiet bubble. Before you knew it, a rough hand was on your shoulder, gently shaking you.
âY/N,â Logan's gruff voice echoed in your ears. âY/N, sweetheart, wake up.â
âMmm?â you hummed. Your head moved to face Logan as your eyes slowly opened.Â
Logan was crouched down with worry etched on his face. âAre you okay?â
âHuh? Oh, yeah. Iâm fine.â You reached out to the sides, stretching.
âReally? Youâre fast asleep at your doorstep. Did you lose your keys?â
âNo, I was too tired after work. What time is it?â
âItâs 5:30 in the morning.â
You laughed. âWell, at least I got some sleep.â
âItâs not safe for you to be sleeping out in the hall, Y/N.â
The true concern in Logan's eyes caused you to stop laughing. âI know.â
"Next time, call Wade or I. We can open the door for ya.â
âThanks.â
He gave a little grunt before taking your hand and helping you to stand up straight. Your heart rapidly beat as you realized how close you were standing to Logan. His hand kept a strong hold on yours as the two of you stared at each other.Â
Logan soon cleared his throat and pulled his hand from yours. âI, uh, I gotta go to work,â he said. âYou gonna be okay?â
âYeah," you nodded. âThanks for waking me.â
âAnytime.â
Logan watched as you dug your keys out of your purse and unlocked your door. You turned to face him with a soft smile that threatened to melt his hardened shell.Â
âThanks again, Logan,â you said. âSee you around.â
âYeah,â he mumbled. "See ya.â
He watched as you slipped into your apartment and shut the door. He didn't move until he heard the door lock behind you. Logan stuffed his hands in his leather jacket and turned around to head to work. His mind was on you the entire way there. Ever since Wade had introduced you to him, Logan knew that there was something different about you. You were sweet and kind even when Logan was guarded and often blew you off. But you didn't care. The more interactions with you he had, the more he wanted to get to know you. Though, he was careful about it. Logan was afraid to get too attached to you. Everyone he had ever cared about was dead; he wouldn't let you end up like them.
~~~
Another long day at work as you trudged up the stairs for the second day in a row. This time, you vowed to make it to your bed. As you reached the top of the stairs, you tripped, falling forward. Before you could land harshly on the ground, strong arms caught you.
âWhoa, there, sweetheart,â Loganâs rough voice soothed you as he lifted you up to your feet. âYou alright?â
âYeah,â you nodded, catching your breath. âThanks for catching me.â
âDonât mention it.â
The two of you stood there, staring at each other in growing silence. Your hands were on his shoulders while his hands were on your waist.
âUh,â Logan cleared his throat as he pulled away and stepped back, âyou coming home from work?â
âYeah,â you nodded. âAnother long shift. Where are you off to?â
âJust needed to get out for a moment. Wade is on one and Vanessa is with him.â
You giggled. âSo I guess that means I will be needing my headphones tonight.â
âSorry. I can try to get him to stop.â
âItâs fine. I donât mind⊠Do you, uh, need a place to go?â
Logan shook his head. âI donât want to be a bother.â
âLogan, youâre never a bother. I have an extra bedroom, bed made, and everything.â
âI donât knowââ
âItâs the least I can do after you saved me the last two nights.â
Logan knew that he shouldnât. Getting close to you was a dangerous game, but you were looking at him with those eyes he couldnât say no to. âFine,â he sighed. Your smile made it all worth it.
âGreat! Follow me.â
Logan trailed behind you and led him to your apartment. You opened the door, holding it open so that he could enter. He had been in your apartment a few times, and it never ceased to feel so homey.Â
âThe extra bedroom is the first door on your right with the bathroom just across from it,â you told him as you hung up your purse and jacket. You slipped off your shoes underneath it.
âThanks,â Logan muttered, awkwardly standing there with his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets as to not intrude on your space.
âMake yourself at home, Logan.â You waved around the living room as you headed to the kitchen. âNeed a drink?â
âUh, no, thanks.â
âYouâre probably tired, long day a work, right?â
âYeah.â
âWell, then, I wonât keep you. Feel free to head to bed. Iâll be out here winding down if you need anything.â
âYouâre not going to bed?â
âIâm gonna watched an episode of a show then I will.â
âOh⊠okay.â He watched as you grabbed a water bottle and headed over to the couch. âNight then.â
You looked over with a smile. âNight, Logan.â Then you turned your focus to your tv.
Logan lingered in his spot, watching as you pulled a blanket over you and got comfortable. He yearned to join you on the couch, to pull you into him and hold you close. But he couldnât. It was too dangerous for you, even though he was living in another universe and didnât have many enemies here. Logan could gain enemies easily and could even hurt you himself. He would just have to learn to love you from afar and just be okay with it.
~~~
A nightmare woke Logan up just a few hours later. He threw the covers off of his sweaty body and got out of bed. Logan didnât even think twice about the fact that he was just in his underwear before he exited the room and headed to the kitchen. The sight of the tv still on had him freezing in place. You were still out there. He strained his ears to hear your steady breathing. Logan carefully snuck over to the couch as peered over. You were sound asleep. His eyes softened at he took you in. He didnât think you could be prettier than you already were, but then there you were.
With quick but quiet movements, Logan grabbed a drink and then came back over to the couch. He crouched down in front of you and allowed himself to take advantage of being this close to you for a moment, just staring lovingly. He was so glad that you werenât awake and that Wade was not around to tease him. Finally, Logan gently pushed his arms underneath you and pulled you into his bare chest. He carried you with ease to your bedroom and tucked you in. Logan couldnât help himself when he leaned down and pressed a kiss to your head.
âSleep well, sweetheart,â he whispered, giving you one last look before slipping out of the room.
~~~
Logan closed your apartment door quietly before he walked over and entered his own. He headed to his room to get ready for the day when a familiar voice stopped him.
âSo⊠howâs Y/N?â Logan could practically hear Wadeâs smirk.
âFine,â Logan huffed.Â
âYeah? And how are you? Riddled with guilt that you did the deed and then walked out on her?â
âShut the fuck up.â
âYou didnât deny it! You had sex!â
âQuiet! Her room is on the other side of the wall. And we did not.â
âSeriously?â
âShe offered me a bed since you had Vanessa over.â
âHow kind of her. Maybe next time, make a move and share a bed, okay? And do it before I lock you two in a room and force the one bed trope on you.â
âShe doesnât like me that way.â
Wade laughed. âYou must be losing your eyesight, peanut. The only one that Y/N has eyes for is you, clearly.â
âWhatever.â Logan stomped back to his room.
âIâm just saying, you may wanna make a move sooner rather than later, Romeo.â
~~~
When you woke up in your bed, you were surprised. You stretched and got yourself up and out of your room. The guest room was open, with the bed made, gaining your concern.Â
âLogan?â You called, heading into the living area. No response. âLogan?âÂ
You were alone in your apartment. You sighed, slightly disappointed that Logan didnât say goodbye. You walked into the kitchen and spotted a note on the counter.
Didnât want to wake you. Had to go to work. Thanks for the bed. ~ L.H.
You smiled at the note, grateful that he even thought to leave it. It was your day off, so you got to work on getting your apartment cleaned and a list of errands that needed to be done.
By early afternoon you had ran most of your errands and were driving home. Your phone buzzed in your cupholder and you quietly pressed the button to answer it.
âHello?âÂ
âHi, Y/N, itâs uh, me, Logan,â his nervous voice filled the car.
You giggled. âHi, Logan. Do you need something? Iâm almost home.â
âUh, yeah, I guess. I got off work early and was thinking that maybe youâd want to get some, uh, food with me?â You bit your lip as Logan spoke, melting at his nervousness. âOf course, if you donât want toââ
âNo! No! Iâd love to.â
âOkay. I can meet you downstairs, help you bring things up, and then we can go.â
âSounds great. See you in a minute.â
âSee ya in a minute.â
You couldnât stop the large smile that grew over your face as Logan hung up the phone. Your fingers anxiously tapped at the steering wheel as you waiting for the light to turn green. As soon as it did, you starting across the intersection. You didnât make it across before a car rammed into your side.
~~~
Loganâs hands were stuffed into the pockets of his leather jacket. He was bouncing on his heels as he looked around for your car. He caught sight of it at the nearest stoplight and kept his eyes glued to it. He saw the incoming car before you did.
âY/N!â Shouted from his lips as his body propelled forward.
The crashing sound echoed around the area as everything came to a halt the moment the car collided with yours. Logan was at the scene in record time. He paid no mind to the driver in the other car as he rushed to where the cars met, at the driverâs door.Â
You were slumped in the seat, cut up and bloody. Logan could hear your breathing, a slight wheeze behind it. Witnesses gathered around, calling 911 and seeing if they could help, but Loganâs sole focus was you and only you. He used his strength to push the cars apart so that he could get to you. He opened your car door and was quick to grab you before you could be jostled too much.
âSweetheart, itâs me,â he said, trying to remain calm. âIâm here, I got you.â
With a snikt, Loganâs claws appeared from one of his knuckles. He used it to carefully cut you free from the seatbelt and the airbag. With great care, Logan pulled you out of the car and laid you on the street.
âY/N, sweetheart, wake up,â he pleaded.Â
You were stilling bleeding in various places and there was no sign of you waking. The sirens grew closer but not before Wade did.
âHoly shit! Peanut!â Wade was dressed in his Deadpool suit, ready for action. âWhat the hell happened here? You distract her with your good looks?â
âShut the fuck up, Wilson!â Logan snapped. âThat car ran through a red like and rammed into her.â His focus returned to you, immediately softening. âYou gotta wake up, sweetheart. Listen to my voice and wake up.â
EMTs rushed over with a stretcher and their other equipment.
âSir,â one of them called, âwe need you to move so that we can check her out.â
Logan bit down the desire to fight back, brushing his hand over your cheek before pulling away. He watched with an intense stare at every move the EMTs made. The EMTs didnât bother to fight him as he climbed into the ambulance with them, headed for the hospital. Though, once there, he was forced into the waiting room where he continued to pace, unable to sit still.
~~~
âMr. Howlett?â A nurse called, hours after they had brought you in.
âYes,â Loganâs long legs made quick work of cutting the distance between him and the nurse.
âMiss Y/N is back in a room now. She had a broken arm, a concussion, a few broken ribs, and some stitches. Nothing she canât heal from. She got extremely lucky.â
Logan felt little relief since you were still injured and he had yet to see you with his own eyes. He followed the nurse back to your room and gave her a grateful nod before pulling a chair to your bedside and taking a seat. His hands were trembling slightly as he reached for your hand and cupped it between his rough ones. Logan waited there silently for hours until you woke up with a cough. He was quick to pour you some water and bring the cup to your lips. He helped you take a drink before he sat back down.
âLoâLogan?â You rasped.
âHey, sweetheart,â his lips lifted slightly, though you could see the great concern still etched on his face.Â
âYouâre hereâŠâ
âOf course, Iâm here. No place Iâd rather be⊠You scared me real bad back there, sweetheart. I thought I was gonna lose you.â
âIâm sorry.â
âNot your fault. Just glad youâre okay.â
~~~
Logan didnât leave your side, even once your were discharged. Your guest room became his room and he made sure that you were taken care of.
âIâm fine, Logan,â you tried to wave him off with your good hand. âGo to work. You havenât been in a few days. Iâll be fine.â
âBut youââ
âI wonât leave the house without you or Wade. Iâll call if I need anything. Go.â
Logan sighed. âFine. But I have my phone on.â
~~~
Your apartment was driving you crazy. You needed to get out. You knew that Wade wasnât home due to how quiet it was next door and you werenât about to call Logan just because of your boredom. You decided that you could handle getting the mail by yourself. Making sure that your phone was on you, you left your apartment and headed for the stairs.Â
Unfortunately, you didnât see that Wade had left one of his stuffed animal snakes near the stairs, causing you to trip over it. You landed with a loud thud at the top of the stairs, hitting your head against the wall. You cried out as tears gathered in your eyes. With trembling hands, you had your phone call Logan.
âSweetheart?â The concern in his voice made you wince. âYou alright?â
âLogan,â you whimpered.
âWhat is it? What happened?â
âIâm sorry. I should have stayed inside. I got bored and I fellââ
âIâm on my way. Stay on the line. What hurts, sweetheart? Keep talking to me.â
âMy⊠my head⊠my arm⊠my sideâŠâ
âShit,â he muttered. âCan you get back into the apartment?â
You thought for a painful second. ââŠNo.â
âThatâs okay. Iâm almost there. Just stay with me, sweetheart. Stay awake.â
ââm⊠tryinââŠâ Your head was getting fuzzy and it was hard to keep your eyes open. ââŠallâŠfuzzyâŠâ
You heard loud footsteps rushing up the stairs before you finally blacked out.
~~~
When you came back to, you were tucked into your own bed. The lights were all off and Logan was sitting beside you on the bed. His head had fallen back and his mouth was open slightly, he was asleep. You needed to sit up but you were afraid of waking him. You tried to push yourself up with one arm but let a whine slip from your lips. Logan jumped awake, eyes wide and frantic as he stared down at you.
âAre you okay?â He asked, keeping his voice soft. âIs something wrong?â
âSorry,â you whispered. âI just needed to move. Didnât mean to wake you.â
âWhat do you need? I can help.â
âYou donât have to. Youâve already done too much.â
âI want to.ïżœïżœïżœ
You stared at Logan, seeing that he meant it with how his eyes were looking at you. âWhy?â
Logan sighed, running a hand down his face. âThis is not how I wanted this to go. I was supposed to take you out, maybe a few times, then tell you.â
âTell me what?â
âHow much I care about you. How seeing you bloodied and bruised had me scared out of my mind⊠I canât live without you, sweetheart. You are the greatest part of my day⊠every day.â
âLogan,â tears welled up in your eyes, âI care about you too, very much.â
Loganâs lips lifted up in a smile that you had rarely ever seen. His hands came up to gently hold your face. âWhen youâre feeling better, Iâd like to take you out.â
âIâd like that.â
âWoot woot!â Wade shouted from the other side of the wall. âAbout damn time.â
You winced at the loudness. Logan scowled at the wall as he pulled you into him like that would protect you from Wadeâs voice.
âKnock it off, Wade,â he whisper shouted. âSheâs concussed.â
âOh, yeah!â Wade didnât quiet down. âSorry!â
Logan shook his head. âIâm gonnaââ
âDonât,â you stopped him from letting you go. âLeave him⊠Iâm fine as long as youâre here.â
He held you tighter, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. âAlways, sweetheart. Iâm not goinâ anywhere.â
#james logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett imagine#logan x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#logan howlet x reader#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett x female!reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x mutant reader#logan howlett x f!reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#wolverine x reader#x men x reader#marvel fanfic#marvel fanfiction#marvel x reader#worst wolverine#worst!logan x reader
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living to learn
âźâ logan x f!mutant!reader (set in deadpool & wolverine)
âźâ summary: logan mulls over all that he has lost, and all that he has found, in the void
âźâ a/n: i was enabled by yall - please heed the warnings! you dont need to read pt 1 to read this!
âźâ warnings: MAJOR DEADPOOL & WOLVERINE SPOILERS, major character deaths, angst, incredibly sad backstory, dead kids / teenagers, practically a genocide of mutants, suicidal ideation (from logan, kind of), reader acts as a mother figure for someone, incorrect dialogue from dp&w, a smidge of comfort, again ANGST, lmk if thereâs more!
part one | masterlist
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Itâs almost impossible not to linger on the things that you have lost.
And for Logan, it is impossible.
He spends every waking moment craving for the touch of somebody he lost, and heâs painfully aware that itâs all his fault. He caused the loss. And heâs the only one left to mourn you, because god knows the humans wonât.
Even for him, some two hundred years old, itâs all too painful. And he has experienced plenty of pain in his life. But this? Losing you? Losing everyone? Itâs too much. So, he does what he can, he pours so much alcohol into his body that he canât think, canât imagine what your final moments must have been like.
But between bars, when his healing factor wears the alcohol down, itâs all he sees.
He imagines you there, surrounded by all of your loved ones except for him, unable to save them. And he can remember finding you so vividly, can remember the ashy tone your skin had taken on, all the life drained from you. He can remember exactly where he found you, in front of the doors, your dying action being to try and save the kids in the mansion. He prays to a god that he doesnât believe in that you died before they did, because knowing that you hadnât been able to save them would have killed you.
And the other X-Men, they died the same way. Trying to protect each other, trying to protect those kids. And perhaps the only one who knew that it was all in vain wouldâve been Jean. Jean, who he found in front of the children.
Where was he?
At some bar, surrounded by humans he couldnât care less about, all because he was selfish. All because he didnât want anybody thinking he wanted to be part of the team. God forbid he actually care about something.
And because of his selfishness, his fear, he lost it all.
He lost you.
So when Wade said he could fix Loganâs universe, he wouldâve done anything to make that happen. Anything that Wade asked for, he wouldâve done. And as soon as his universe was fixed, Logan would go to you and get to his knees, he would beg for your forgiveness.
And all of that, that hope that had evaded him all those years, was for nothing. For an educated wish.
Logan couldnât do anything but resort to his old habits, grabbing the first bottle of actual alcohol he saw, and finally numbing the image of you dead in his arms.
âThereâs five of us.â Elektra told Wade, and Logan paid her no mind. Everything was futile now, pointless. He was only helping Wade to help the team, to help you, and that was likely impossible. So whatever these so-called heroes were planning, he wanted no part in it.
Logan had already secured his legacy in his universe, and it wasnât the one you had always imagined for him. He was the Wolverine, and he was every bit of violence that name suggested. Because even though he hadnât been able to save the X-Men, he sure as hell got his vengeance. He hadnât slept, hadnât eaten, until every single human who was remotely involved in the blood bath at X-Mansion was dead.
You wouldnât have been proud of his actions, true, but you were dead.
Cassandra had mentioned something about temperance, earlier, and it hadnât taken him long to recognise that you were the anchor of his. Without you, Logan hadnât managed any sort of self-restraint. He had slaughtered people. And he could only bring himself to regret those that hadnât quite deserved it.
By the time the red had faded from his vision, Logan realised he had gone too far. He hadnât just killed the ones who had murdered his friends, but anyone in connection to them, and anyone who had gotten in his way. The only reason he wasnât arrested was because they were too afraid of him, and the only reason he hadnât been killed was because he couldnât fucking die.
Even the fuckers that had slaughtered the X-Men couldnât figure out how to kill him, and that was a sick kind of irony.
âLogan, thatâs who I was telling you about! X-23!â Wade said excitedly, pointing across the room at a teenage girl, who stared at him like she was seeing a ghost. From the sound of what Wade had said earlier, she probably was.
And the sight of her, for some reason, tugged at his chest. He drowned the feeling with more whiskey.
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âHey.â Laura greeted you, fidgeting with the strap of her bag as she watched you enter the back of the base, carrying a bag full of food. She seemed nervous, and you couldnât figure out why.
âHey, Laura, everythinâ alright?â You asked fondly, glancing at her as you started unpacking the supplies that youâd found scattered across the void.
She hesitated, glancing back through the doorway she was stood in, before focusing on you. âYeah. Uh, I need to talk to you.â She said, sounding incredibly serious, which wasnât unusual for her. Laura had been through so much, including everything that she had told you about her life before the void. Being here hadnât made her life any better.
You immediately paused your actions, and turned your full attention towards the teenager across from you. You nodded for her to start.
âI was out patrolling earlier, and I found some people.â Laura said slowly, thinking her words over thoroughly before she spoke them aloud. She didnât want to make this any worse. âI drove them here, and weâve made a plan to attack Cassandraâs first thing. Except for one of the two, who doesnât want to help.â
âOkayâŠâ You said cautiously, almost confused. âThis all sounds good, doesnât it? Whoever they are, they can stay here if they want. Fill me in on the plan, and weâll handle it.â
âItâs⊠okay. Itâs about who they are.â She clarified finally, giving up on trying to approach the situation cautiously. âItâs a variant of him. Of Logan.â
Your chest squeezed painfully immediately, and you hand to hold a hand to your sternum to try and ease it. If it were any other situation, Laura may have made a joke about you having a heart attack, but she knew better. She knew how she had felt when she first saw the man, so she could imagine how you were feeling.
Immediately, your heart was torn between rushing to see him, and refusing to lay your eyes on the man at all. You werenât sure you could handle seeing him, or, well, a variant of him.
It hurt too much. Every day you were reminded of how you had failed to save him, but you had to keep going, for the others in the void. Because they needed you, just as much as you needed them. Laura needed you.
She knew your pain all too well, having lost her own Logan. So you knew what she was telling you was the truth. There was really, finally, a Wolverine variant in the void.
âYou okay?â Laura asked, after you had been silent for more moments than she was comfortable with. She was looking at you with such concern, and you could tell that her own heart was practically bursting in her chest from the sight of him.
âAre you?â You asked in return, eyebrows raised as you finally started to get a grip on yourself, shaking yourself from the pit of loss you had begun to get stuck in. She nodded, and you nodded yourself before pausing to think. âAnd this⊠Logan, he doesnât want to join to Cassandraâs?â
Laura shook her head, looking down momentarily. âNo. Heâs⊠heâs as messed up as my Logan was.â
You approached her, drawing her into a silent hug. She squeezed you tightly, and the strength her mutation â Loganâs mutation â had given her wasnât lost on you.
âDo you want me to talk to him?â You asked her quietly, and felt her nod against your shoulder. âAlright. Where is he?â You questioned, silently steeling yourself to face a copy of the man you had lost. The man you had loved.
She pointed you in the right direction, letting you go with a simple, âGood luck.â The entire walk outside, you were holding your breath, trying to prepare yourself somehow. As if this was something you would ever be able to prepare for.
And the moment you saw him, you knew it was all in vain. Because nothing couldâve prepared you for seeing him again, after all this time.
For a moment, it felt as though time was stood still, suspended.
Until he opened his mouth. ââM not lookinâ for company.â
It was him. His familiar voice. The voice that you wouldâve recognised anywhere, even after so long not having heard it. He sounded just the same as your own Logan, the same gruff tone to his voice, all grumpy expressions and furrowed brows. You could imagine it all as though your Logan was still alive, as though he was actually here. It took more than a moment for you to recall that this wasnât your Logan.
You shuffled over to the log he sat on, the sun setting over the trees surrounding the two of you. He lifted the bottle of whiskey to his lips, glancing at you as you sat. His entire body went shock still, and he turned to look at you fully.
You smiled, and prayed he said nothing about the way your eyes became watery. âHi, Logan.â
He said your name, sounding as though he was a mere man sat before a god, reverent. The bottle slipped from his hand as he spoke it aloud, his eyes watering immediately, his lip trembling as he looked at you like he was seeing you for the very first time.
âAre you⊠her?â He asked hesitantly, hand hovering halfway towards you, and you hated to be the bearer of bad news. But if you had to be conscious that he wasnât yours, it was only fair for him to know the truth.
Reluctantly, you shook your head. âIâm sorry. Iâm not your version of me, and youâre not my version of you.â
His hand fell to his lap, but he didnât take his eyes off of you for a moment. He seemed reluctant to believe you, and you couldnât blame him. He looked just like your version of him, grey streaks and all. But it wasnât him, you knew, because he wasnât coughing up blood, wasnât actively dying in your arms.
You cleared your throat, glancing to the fire before him, watching the way the smoke curled into the slowly darkening sky. âMy Logan died. IâI couldnât save you. Iâve been here, in the void, for a year, I think.â You elaborated slightly, not wanting to overwhelm him with information. âIâd like to go home. Mourn my losses.â
He stared at you, saying nothing, fingers still outstretched where his hand lay.
âLaura said you werenât coming with in the morning. I was hoping you might change your mind. We need your help.â You continued, trying to remain convincing despite the shake in your voice.
But that seemed to do the opposite of what you wanted, and he blinked out of the trance he had been in. He started shaking his head immediately, fingers clenching into a fist. âYou got the wrong guy. Iâm not⊠Iâm not who you think I am.â
âMaybe not, but, Laura told me you were always the wrong guy, up until you werenât. And to her, that means something. To me, too.â You said, hoping he wouldnât pull away further than he already had. As selfish as it was, you didnât want to lose another Logan. You wanted to see him and his friend succeed, even if you didnât. Maybe, this time, this Logan, you could save him.
âYou donât get it.â Logan refuted, shaking his head, glancing towards the fire as the sun finally finished descending the horizon. He seemed to get lost in the blaze, and you watched his eyes become unfocused, showing him images that werenât really there. âI failed them. My team. You.â
You stayed quiet, wondering if he was going to elaborate, or if he was too caught up in his vision.
âDâyou know somethingâ?â He asked, blinking until the fire came back into focus. âYou used to beg me to wear this suit. So did Storm, Scott, Beast. All of you. And I refused, because god forbid anybody believe I wanted to be there.â
âWhat happened?â You asked him, wanting to reach for his hand, but knowing it wouldnât help him get through this.
âI went out. And the humans went mutant hunting. By the time I stumbled home shit-faced from the bar⊠youâyou were all dead. Every single mutant in that house.â He explained, his voice shaking, his lower lip trembling once again. You were almost certain he was seeing those images again, because he squeezed his eyes shut, gritting his teeth.
A surge of sympathy shot through you. You wanted so badly to comfort him, to tell him it wasnât his fault, but you knew he wouldnât believe it.
âSo now I wear this goddamn suit as a reminder. To remember all of you. To make sure I never forget what I did.â
You released a deep sigh, the story sounding familiar to you, in some ways. He glanced over at you, seeing somebody else for a moment. After another few seconds, you reached into your shirt and pulled out the dog tags you had been carrying with you. You turned them over in your hand, running your thumb over the inscription.
He glanced wearily at them, and you reached out, grasping his fist in your own hand and pulling it loose until you could fit the dog tags in his hand, which you then squeezed shut. âI carry these with me, for the same reason. To remind myself that I failed you. That I canât take that back. That I have to do better, even if all I want to do is give up. You arenât the only one who did something wrong, here. If I could fix my mistakes, I would, but I canât. So I carry on. For Laura. For anyone who needs it. And it seems like this⊠Wade needs it. From you.â
His hand was splayed open, turning over the dog tags in his palm as he listened intently to you.
âBe the hero you werenât the first time around.â You told him finally, reaching out and placing your palm in his, squeezing around the dog tags, before letting go.
You went to stand, and he stood after you, reaching out.
âIâI know you arenât her. I know that. But can I pretend, for a minute, that you are?â He asked you, and the vulnerability of the request wasnât lost on you. Your Logan rarely ever asked for anything, even if he desperately needed it, so you could only imagine the courage that this Logan had mustered to ask you that.
You nodded, silent.
There was a pause, and he looked into your eyes, searching for something that you didnât know you possessed. But he seemed to find it.
ââM sorry. Iâm so, so sorry.â Logan told you at last, the apology seeming to burst from the depths of his chest. âI love you. I have loved you the whole time. I should have told you as soon as I felt it.â He confessed, and you saw the dog tags hanging from his fingers as he reached for you. And you couldnât help yourself â you reached right back.
Your hands landed on either side of his face, so full of care, and you watched the tear run down his cheek. His own hands gripped you tightly, scared to let you go.
âIâm sorry.â He repeated, voice broken.
âIt wasnât your fault.â You told him firmly, before rushing forward, pulling him into a hug so tight you couldâve heard his metal bones creak. He buried his face in your hair, breathing you in, and held you tight. âI donât blame you. I love you.â You said, breathing the words into his ear as though that would make him believe it. He gripped you tighter, squeezing you against him. âI love you.â
You cradled the back of his head with one hand, pressing him close, because you were just as scared to let him go. Distantly, you heard Laura call your name.
After a moment, you pulled back slightly, only to press your forehead against his for a minute. You could pretend that he was your Logan, selfishly, just for a moment more.
Laura got closer, calling out your name once more, and you pulled back to look in his eyes. âI love you.â He told you one last time, before he allowed you to pull yourself from his grasp.
You had no idea whether he would be joining your group tomorrow, but you walked away from him with an empty chest, wiping away the tears that had dared to fall during the encounter. You would leave the last of the motivational speech to Laura, who you smiled gently at as you passed her in the woods, nodding towards where Logan still stood.
Logan had gotten what he needed from you. And you, from him.
#heartlogan writes#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett one shot#logan howlett fic#logan howlett imagine#logan x reader#logan howlett x f!reader#logan howlett angst#logan comfort#logan howlett x you#wolverine imagine#wolverine x reader#wolverine angst#wolverine fic#wolverine x f!reader#worst wolverine x you#worst wolverine fic#worst wolverine angst#worst wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine one shot
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This Moment
AI-Less Whumptober 2024: Day 11. Hallucinations Fandom: X-Men, Logan, Wolverine, Worst!Logan, f!reader, reader Summary: Waking up with you in his bed should be a dream come true. But as you get ready for the day, Logan wishes things could be different. Word Count:Â 1049 TW: Hurt/Comfort, Hallucinations, Character Death, Reader's Hair Mentions, Reader has Pierced Ears, Drinking, Language Notes: This is my first time writing for Logan! Let me know what you think! đ Thanks to @ohtobeleah for reassuring me this was a good concept to run with! Part of @ailesswhumptober's event! đ
âWhy donât you just tell him the truth?â you asked as you grabbed your bra off the floor and slipped your arms into it. âWade deserves to know what youâre dealing with.â
âWhy? So he can realize Iâm even more fucked up than he already thinks I am?â Logan growled, rolling over to gaze at your bare back as you reached around to hook your bra. He reached out, one finger softly grazing your skin as he traced the curve of your spine.Â
Peering over your shoulder to look at him, you smiled, âHe already calls you âthe worst Loganâ. I donât think you have very far to fall.âÂ
You bent over and kissed the top of his head before climbing off the bed, padding over to the bathroom. From the other room, you called, âAnd itâs not like heâs the perfect example of mental health. Heâs always talking about âbreaking the fourth wallâ? What the hell is that about?â
Logan chuckled to himself as he tossed the sheet to the side and let his bare feet hit the floor. He stood and walked over to the trunk in the corner of the room. Opening the lid, he cursed. Only two bottles of whiskey left. Heâd need to get some moreâtoday. If not, maybe Althea had some more fingernail polish remover he could chug.Â
Oh, wait, no. That was Wadeâs.
Grabbing one of the bottles, Logan turned just as you strolled out of the bathroom. You had touched up your makeup and pulled your hair back but were wearing the same dress as the night before, the zipper undone and the sides fluttering as you walked.Â
Stopping in front of him but turned the other way, you silently waited. Logan once again trailed his finger down your back, his hand coming to rest on the swell of your ass. But as he squeezed it, you swatted his hand away. âStop that! You know we canât.â
âYeah. I know,â Logan sighed wearily before zipping your dress all the way to the top. Then he pressed his lips to the base of your neck, trying to catch the faintest hint of trace of the smell of your skin.Â
But you stepped away and hurried to the mirror. Grabbing a set of earrings off the dresser, you began trying to get it into the hole in your ear.
Usually, Logan let you go about your routine without saying a word. However, between the lack of alcohol and the nightmares that had plagued his sleep the night before, he couldnât help but snap, âWhy do you always do that?â
You sighed, still trying to get your earring to cooperate. âDo what?â
âThat. This. All of it! The dress, the makeup, the earrings, all of it!â He swept his arm across the top of the bedside table, sending empty bottles crashing to the floor where they shattered into tiny pieces. Yet you didnât even flinch as he growled, âEvery damn day itâs the same fucking thing. Why canât we just stay in bed and forget everything else? Just for one fucking day!â
âYou know why, Lo,â you said matter-of-factly as you turned to look at him. âItâs because this is what I did the last morning you saw me. The last happy memory you have of me before I was ripped from your arms. When they came for us and that blade was driven through my heart, I used the last millisecond of life I had to use my powers and cry out to you, to feel you one last time. And when you felt me in your head as you sat in that bar, when you realized what was happening and that you were too far away to stop it, this is the moment you grabbed onto. Held on so tightly that it split from the rest of me and fused onto your soul. You kept me alive, but only in this moment. And thatâs why itâs always the same. We can have different conversations, we can change little things, but ultimately, I can only follow this set moment.â You turned back to the mirror and picked up the other earring. Glancing up to where he was reflected, you asked, âNo matter how many times you asked me that, the answer will never change.â
Logan nodded, his head hanging low as the weight of his loss once again overwhelmed him. âI know. But I canât help but hopeâŠâ
Your expression softened. Standing, you walked over to him and placed your hands on either side of his face. âHeyâŠâ Slowly, his eyes flickered up to look at you. âThe other thing that will never change is how much I love you. Now, and for all eternity.âÂ
âAnd I love you, sweetheart. More than I ever got to tell you. And thatâs why I canât stand doing this day after fucking day. Iâm sorry.â He raised the bottle to his lips, downing 3/4s of it in one long swallow.
You nodded, a sad smile on your lips as tears crested over your eyelids and down your cheeks. âWell, then I guess Iâll see you tomorrowâŠor whenever you finally sober up.â
Reaching out, he wiped his thumb across your cheek. He could feel the warmth of your skin, the damp wetness of your tears. And yet, the moment he pulled his hand away, it was gone. Just like the real you was gone. Now, all he had left was this ghost, this specter that haunted his every waking moment unless he drowned it out with booze or drugs. Your death had been hell for him to accept but thisâŠthis was something far crueler.
âYou know,â he muttered, staring into your teary eyes. âI still donât know whatâs worse. The dread of knowing if I stop drinking, youâll come back. Or the fear that one timeâŠyou wonât.â
âBut wouldnât that be better? To end this torture once and for allâŠâ Your voice began to fade as the alcohol dulled his senses until Logan found himself alone in his room at Wadeâs once more.
He collapsed back onto the bed, draining the rest of the bottle. Then, placing his hand on the empty side of the bed, he whispered, âI donât know, sweetheart. I really donât know.â
#sfw repost#fic#ailesswhumptober2024#ailesswhumptober#wolverine#logan howlett#james logan howlett#worst wolverine#the worst wolverine#worst logan#the worst logan#the worst logan x reader#the worst wolverine x reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#james logan howlett x reader#f!reader#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool & wolverine#xmen#whumptober#hallucinations#hurt/comfort#hurt & comfort#character death tw
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currently writing a worst!logan x bimbo!reader request so I need yalls filthiest ideas for when they finally go to pound town pls and thank you. for context, reader was the complete opposite in his universe so it's really jarring for him that this version of you is so forward. nothing is off limits so give me your worst and most depraved !!!
#logan howlett#logan howlett smut#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x f!reader#worst!logan x reader#logan howlett x you#inkedells
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'hunger' 18+
worst!wolverine x f!reader (3.9k words) summary: logan can't tear his mind away from the new barmaid at his usual haunt. he tries to resist you, he really does. but when you're both alone in the bathroom, he finds he's not the only one plagued with filthy thoughts. tags: for the 'longing' prompt for logan promptober, set in the bar from the movie, kind of angsty, filthy, pent up logan, alcohol consumption, doggy style, creampie, biting, light choking, pinning wrists, hair pulling, spanking, rough sex, implied age gap, sweet ending.
his usual haunts offer comfort, safe nests tucked away down isolated roads, usually requiring quite the drive to find - it's hard to find places where he's thought of as a stranger. no familiar faces, no conversation, no fuss. just logan, a bottle of whisky and time.
time spent staring into the grain of the old wood on the bar wondering how the fuck he ended up here. he'd stopped keeping count a long time ago, how long he'd been around, been alive. things get kind of hazy after two hundred years. logan had no reason to keep count.
until he saw you.
the bar was busy, as it normally was. he didn't mind it this way, less attention on him, less chances of someone trying to pick a fight with a specific stranger. not that they'd win, but logan had grown too tired for petty fights these days.
he's sat at the bar when the bartender clocks off, switching with someone new, someone he'd never seen before. you walk in and his eyes immediately scan your face, your build, your outfit. it's a habit of his, one he hoped he'd grow out of - but logan has learned that he'll never stop assessing for new threats. it's just in his dna.
but what he finds isn't a threat.
you're easy on the eyes, especially to these tired old hues that have grown accustomed to staring at the same old walls. he drags his eyes back down to his glass like he's forcing himself to look down the barrel of a gun rather than looking at you, before settling on you once more.
logan can't let himself look too much, he isn't allowed nice things, especially not pretty little things such as yourself. he's poison, tainting everything he touches, spoiling it. he's experienced enough heartbreak, enough losses for a lifetime and more.
. . . but what harm can looking do?
a few weeks pass, logan notices you're in every few nights from now on, must have been put on the regular rota. he wonders if you know most of the tips you receive by the end of the night are from him. you're diligent, you work hard, and you deserve more than the minimum wage you're probably getting.
you've never noticed him, or at least, he's never caught you looking in his direction. but he finds himself craving it, willing your eyes to meet his even for a second. the extent of your interactions have been sliding a glass or a bottle in his direction before continuing with your other duties.
it's not even lust on his mind either, he just finds himself captivated by your presence. he wonders about your life, your interests, your dreams. . . though he'd be lying if he said he'd never pictured bending you over against the bar and fucking you senseless.
he is an animal, after all.
he wonders if he should switch bars just to distance himself. he couldn't let himself become comfortable with the idea of you. relying on others was a weakness. besides, what would you be to him but just another person he'd lose someday? it wasn't worth it. you weren't worth it.
fuck.
logan curses himself under his breath for even having this internal debate. you were strangers, this was stupid, it was all fucking stupid. but the mind of a lonely old man is a desperate one, and what logan really craves isn't just eye candy. he craves a touch, that first touch that sparks electricity throughout your every nerve ending, causes goosebumps to ripple along the skins surface. he craves something, anything.
he was so fucking hungry. always so fucking hungry. a rumbling hunger that starts at the pit of his stomach and gnaws through him like a rabid animal frantically trying to escape a suffocating metal cage. it's a hunger he can't satisfy, he knows he can't satisfy. but he'd been alone so long.
surely one bite couldn't hurt?
no, he finds himself shaking his head as he stands from the bar. he'd take a leak, and leave early. it'd only been a month since he first saw you, he could get over this. switching bars wasn't particularly appealing to him, but it was better than having to look at you and feel that familiar ache.
the bathroom door swings open and he walks inside, situating himself at one of the urinals. a few moments later, the door swings open again, logan doesn't bother to look over.
"oh, thought these were empty, sorry."
his head turns quickly. it's you, mop in hand. there's an uncomfortable silence that follows.
speak, fucking speak. "it's fine."
you pause, then nod a little and begin mopping the floor.
his eyes are back on the urinal, swallowing hard. was this really going to be your first conversation? with his eyes glaring into old porcelain, dick in his hand? he tries not to picture you stealing glances at him, but he can't help it. is that what he wants?
maybe.
finishing up, he quickly makes his way over to the sinks, pushing his hands under the cool water and rubbing with soap. his eyes flit up to the mirror. and he catches you.
your eyes lock on one another for just a split second before you quickly busy yourself with the mop again.
but that split second was enough. it was enough to notice how you were looking at him.
"all done," you say with a sigh after a few moments, standing straight and gripping the mop but making no effort to leave just yet.
logan eyes you in the mirror, watches how your eyes dance across the room before inevitably landing on him again. he turns to face you, noting the distance between you both in the room.
you lean back against the bathroom stall divider, eyes drifting across logan's figure. he was tall, big. this is the first time you're really able to look at him, to study the features of his face. this time he's not hiding behind a glass or a bottle.
the hunger in his gaze is obvious, but it's dulled, like he's just barely holding back. you think he looks lonely, there's a distinct air about him that practically screams that he needs to be touched.
you rest your mop against the wall, "you're in here often." you state, it's not a question.
"guess i'm a regular," he replies curtly.
swallowing hard, you continue, "i noticed. i always have to restock the whisky when you come by."
logan pushes himself from the sink and approaches you slowly. was he really doing this? after a month of pining and longing for you, a stranger in a bar, was he really going to give in to his desires? would you let him? the lust was clear in your eyes and he knew he was reflecting it right back tenfold.
"i like a drink." he says with a subtle shrug, just a step away now, eyes never leaving yours.
a small smile tugs at your lips, "i know."
you're not sure what you're really doing. you're supposed to be on shift, designated five minutes to clean the bathrooms. five minutes you'd much rather spend doing someone something else.
you eye the stranger who's been watching you, tipping you. of course you've noticed, you'd have to be pretty stupid or oblivious not to. you've come to expect him at each shift, but his presence intrigued you more than the other regulars. not just because he was more handsome, considerably more handsome.
no, it was those sad eyes that seemed to say a million words while his mouth remained firmly shut that had you curious. even now as he stands before you so silent you could hear a pin drop, when you look into his eyes you can feel a sea of words brewing.
oh how you wanted to open him up, to peer inside behind that rough exterior, to take a peek behind the facade. you're sure you're easier to read than he is.
you're not sure when or how it happened, but he's right in front of you now, his body almost touching yours. you look up at him with a feigned innocent look.
"i've seen you, you know," you mumble bravely, "looking at me."
logan doesn't seem surprised, he brings a hand up to hold your chin, turning your face from side to side to get a proper look at you now that he has you up close. "yeah?"
"yeah," you reply shakily, "thought i was imagining it at first. but by the second night it was obvious."
he smirks, so he's not as subtle as he thinks.
your hands snake down, finding his belt buckle and brazingly begin to unbuckle it. he watches you, eyes fixated on the way your fingers move. he swears he's about to start drooling. but then you move, hands winding up to the buttons on his shirt. you splay your hands across the fabric, eyes widening when you feel what's underneath.
"are you. . . is that-"
logan grips your wrists, not the suit. he wasn't talking about that now, he had to shut you up. he leans in, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss as his strong hands keep a firm grip on your wrists. you submit, leaning back against the cubicle divider as you let him slip his tongue into your mouth.
he moans, relishing the taste of you, the taste he's thought about for so fucking long. he brings your hands up, pinning them above your head, shifting his grip so one hand easily pins your wrists, leaving his other hand free.
his free hand plants firmly across your upper chest, the rough pads of his fingers brushing against your collarbone as he explores your mouth with his tongue. you're lost in the sensation, knees going weak as you allow the older man to have his way with you. he needs this, you know it.
"taste so fuckin' sweet," he mumbles against your lips, kissing you between words, "you do this often? let men kiss you in the bathroom?"
you mumble a 'no' under your breath, ". . . just the ones who tip good," you grin.
logan feels himself chuckling, biting your lower lip. oh, he liked you. his hand travels upwards, finding purchase around your neck. you gasp in response, moaning. he eagerly swallows your moan with his mouth, drowning out any sound that threatens to escape.
the kiss grows in intensity, you wonder how long it's been since he's kissed someone. he kisses you like a man starved, like he'd devour you if you let him. and you would, you think, if it felt this good.
his hand on your neck gives a gentle squeeze before running down your torso, palming at your jeans suddenly. you try to whimper in pleasure, but he's silencing you with his lips again.
"shhh, shhh," he whispers against your lips, "feel good? i know it feels good, but you gotta stay nice and quiet." logan can feel the material of your jeans begin to damp and he resists the urge to growl, feeling the way the fabric beneath gives way.
you nod, whispering small affirmatives as he touches you through the material. "just give me more," you whine.
and that spurs him on. in a flash he's pushing you into the stall, stealing a few more kisses where he can before he turns you, pushing your back against his chest. his lips find your neck, pressing hot open-mouthed kisses along the skin he finds there.
you're like putty in his hands, melting back against him as his hand returns to your crotch, rough hands massaging circles against your clothed core. you resist a moan, exhaling shakily instead as you let him use you.
"you wanted this just as much as i did, huh?" he growls into your ear, "need it, need me to fuck you."
you nod quickly as you feel his lips curve into a smirk against your skin.
"yeah, thought so," he nibbles on your earlobe, breathing deeply through his nose as he tries to steady himself, preserve the moment. but how can he when you feel this good beneath his fingers, taste this good on his tongue? "tell me you want it."
"want you to fuck me," you whimper almost immediately, suddenly feeling so very needy. there's a hot ache growing between your legs, one you're desperate for him to fill.
logan laughs, "you can do better than that, honey, know you can."
"please," your voice cracks and you swallow back moans as you squirm beneath his touch, "please fuck me-" it becomes apparent to you at that moment that you don't even know his name. your cheeks flush at the thought of letting this stranger, this older man fuck you in the bar bathroom, but actually, you kind of like it that way.
he nods against the side of your cheek, his stubble scratching against your soft skin, "there we go, attagirl. . ."
with that, he pushes you forward, forcing your hands onto the tank of the toilet to support yourself as he bends you over. his hands find your waist, his hips connecting with yours and slowly grinding his very apparent, large bulge against you.
you let out a whimper, arching your back a little at the sudden contact.
"feel that?" he mumbles, guiding your hips to grind back against him, "feel what you do to me?"
a gasp, "fuck, you're big." you can already tell, the way his bulge is pressing against you, demanding to be felt. you swear you can almost feel it throb through the material.
"yeah i am," logan smirks, he knows he's big, and he knows exactly how to use it.
pulling back slightly, he roughly pulls your jeans down, practically manhandling you, your underwear disappearing with it. he grabs handfuls of your ass before kneading the skin. "look at that, pretty little ass, all for me."
you just have time to gasp before you feel one of his hands connect harshly with your skin, the sound ringing out in the small bathroom of the bar. "f-fuck!" you whine, feeling the sharp sting, knowing there's a bright red imprint in the shape of his large palm on your ass.
there's some jingling, the sound of his belt being moved out of the way, a zipper. you prepare yourself, or at least you try to, but his cock is already slapping against your backside before you have time to steady your hazy mind.
"you gonna take all of me?" he asks, biting his lip as his aching length slaps against your skin, "think you can?"
you nod quickly, looking over your shoulder at him, "mhm!"
"if you say so. . ." he smirks and positions himself, one hand on your hip and one aiming his cock at your tight little hole.
then, all at once he's sinking in. you gasp, he gasps. and fuck, he is big. you feel that sweet stretch, his cock throbbing against your tight walls as it slowly glides inside. you're whining as it slowly fills you, eyes rolling back at the sensation. but he pulls out a little, only to push back in again.
he's working you up just right, mesmerised by the way you take his cock. his eyes are fixed on your tight hole begging him to enter, loving the slick sound as it pushes inside.
"you've been thinkin' about this since you started your shift," logan says confidently, his words confirmed by how you drip around him, "thought about me fillin' you up, nice and full?"
despite the way your cheeks flush bright red, you can't deny it. you've thought about it more than once, fantasised about it in bed, hoping that one day that stranger from the bar would fuck you so good you forget your own name.
you don't need to reply either, because he knows. he knows from the way your wet hole flutters around him, and fuck does it make him harder to know that you've thought about this just as much as he has. he begins to pump into you at a leisurely pace, firm hands on your hips.
"holy fuck, so fuckin' tight," logan grumbles, his deep slow strokes hitting you deep as he bottoms out inside of you.
you try to turn your head, to look up at him, but he grasps the back of your hair, pushing your head down. "nu-uh, keep that head down."
he knows if he lets you look at him, look up at him for too long, he'll lose it. he can't have your soft eyes on him while he fucks you, he doesn't deserve it. he'll take you, just like this, with your head down and your ass up and his cock buried deep inside you.
because he can't describe the shame that swirls in his stomach, that this is how he relieves himself, a quick fuck in a bar. this dirty older man who's seen so much sin, perpetuated sin with his own hands, who longed for the young pretty little thing in the bar. logan doesn't deserve nice things, this he knows.
you feel his thrusts grow rougher, your legs slipping apart as you attempt to hold yourself up, hands planted firmly on the tank of the toilet. you're squeaking softly with each pump, feeling him use you to release his pent-up frustrations. and it felt so fucking good.
with his firm grip on your hair tightening by the second and his other large hand digging into your hip, you begin to bounce back against his motions, sending him even deeper. you both moan in sync with the feeling and you pant softly, cheeks flushing further at the soft 'plap plap plap' of his hips connecting with you, the sound reverberating around the small cubicle.
"that feels so fucking good," you sing, closing your eyes. logan gives a particularly hard thrust, speed picking up. you can't help but smirk, mouth stuck open as you moan softly, he likes it when you talk to him during, huh? "keep fuckin' me, just like that, so good. . ."
he groans, wrapping your hair around his fist as he relentlessly pounds into you. harder and harder, deeper and deeper, you're sure you'll have bruises littered over your body before the day is through.
"harder!" you cry, feeling your legs tremble. you're not gonna last long like this, and by the way his cock is twitching inside of you, he isn't either. "i'm gonna cum, you're gonna make me fuckin' cum!"
another groan slips from his lips, gritting his teeth as he uses you, watching you take his throbbing cock beneath him. "look so pretty like this, bent over, takin' what i fuckin- shit. . . takin' what i give you."
your body grows hotter, sweat forming on your forehead, each impact pushing you forward roughly. you're really not gonna last long.
he begins to hunch over, his chest flush with your back as he huffs against your neck, fucking you like a rabid animal. you're squealing now, the pleasure swirling in your lower stomach, threatening to send you crashing into bliss. at this point, you don't fucking care if someone walks in and finds you like this, sees his feet planted behind yours underneath the stall. in fact, the thought of the risk sends a bolt straight to your gut.
"yes yes yes," you mutter, feeling your orgasm approaching steadily. you swear you can feel him in your guts. you begin to flutter around him, begging for release, knowing it's going to completely destroy you.
logan can't even form words, just grunts slipping from his lips against the side of your neck. and then he feels it, his cock twitches, his mind reeling with the imminent release. he needs this, oh he fucking needs this.
he bites down on your neck, teeth sinking in slightly as he feels himself release deep inside you, his cum spilling out in strong waves. you feel your knees buckle, but a strong hand planted on your tummy helps keep you upright as he fucks his release deeper into you.
the animalistic nature of his thrusts combined with the sensation of his hot cum painting your insides sends you flying over the edge, your orgasm milking him as you clamp around his aching cock. he slams his hand against the stall wall with a loud metallic bang, splaying his fingers across the metal as if to ground himself as his thrusts falter.
his tongue lazily licks the indents of his bite mark against your neck, groans easing their way from the back of his throat. you can hardly catch your breath, legs still shaking from such an intense release. it's hard to think straight with his dick still buried deep inside, feeling it twitch with every aftershock.
you both stay like that for a solid minute, panting, coming down together. he's planting soft kisses along your neck as your breath slowly comes back to you.
he pulls out, stepping back as he stuffs himself into his jeans. you collapse onto the toilet seat, shakily pulling your jeans and underwear back up as you look up at him. it's clear he's looking to leave, a distant look in his eye, maybe a little shame creeping into his features.
standing on trembling legs, you lean up, giving him a surprisingly soft kiss. your hands take over his, helping him back into his jeans, zipping them up, clasping the buttons together and buckling his belt. all the while your lips are on his, slowly, passionately intertwining together.
you pull back, buttoning your own jeans as you continue to look up at him. ". . . does that count as your tip for the night?" you joke with a smirk, hoping to see a flash of his smile again, hoping to alleviate some of that shame he's carrying.
and there it is, a small smirk on his lips as he glances away. "maybe."
the shame seems to settle, begins to dissipate. it feels less like satisfying an urge and more like. . . exploring something new. his eyes drift back to you.
"i'll see you tomorrow?" you ask, tilting your head.
he blinks, suddenly remembering time exists outside this small space seemingly crafted just for the two of you. "yeah," he says, quietly.
"good," you pat his chest before moving past him, leaving the stall. you stand, looking back at him. a beat, "or, you can meet me after my shift ends?"
his eyes widen, taken aback. fuck, had he forgotten how to do this? his eyes flit to the side, before making up his mind. he gives a firm nod.
you smile before leaving him in the bathroom, returning to the bar through the door.
logan stands there for a few moments, running his fingers through his hair. he smooths down his shirt, feeling the suit beneath, a stark reminder always of his past.
but maybe he could begin to take a few steps forward. maybe he deserves more than to suffer forever, forced to keep everyone at arm's length. maybe he could allow himself this small happiness, a date, or whatever this was.
maybe it was time to satisfy his hunger, his loneliness, for good.
#my writing#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x f!reader#wolverine smut#logan howlett x you#logan howlett smut#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#james howlett#deadpool 3#deadpool movie#james logan howlett#x men#xmen fanfiction#x men movies#marvel x reader#marvel#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#marvel comics#marvel mcu#hugh jackman#worst wolverine
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â sugar, sugar
[part ii] | [part iii] | [masterlist]
wolverine/logan howlett x neighbor!f!reader
rated e - 6.5k
tags: asshole friend!wade, (sorta soft) roommate!logan, baker!neighbor!reader, flirting, mutual yearning, immature humor, a reference to while you were sleeping, wingman!wade and the worse way to meet someone, light angst, oral sex, swallowing, fingering, v. light ass play, unprotected PiV, appearance of The Claws, whatâs a refractory period, sorta audible voyeurism (brief/humorous)
a/n: includes spoilers for deadpool & wolverine (which omg I loved - what was your fave cameo?)
Your eccentric neighbor Wade may drive you a little up the wall⊠but, youâre willing to put up with him if it means heâll introduce you to his new, grumpy-looking roommate.
âYou gonna introduce me?â
Youâve cornered Wade in the apartmentâs laundry room - the door to the front-loading washer hanging open as he holds a bundle of red fabric up to his chest.
âYou think this will wash out?âÂ
The suit in question looks like it had been run over by a truck and then set on fire, with the rips criss-crossed in the leather and the numerous charred holes scattered across the chest.
âDefinitely.â Your eyes flicker down, and then back up, âSo, will you?â
He bundles the suit up - flinging into the back of the washer, the laundry basket still tucked under an arm.
âReally? Not even âhello, Wadeâ? âLooking good, Wadeâ?â His voice pitches up, imitating yours, âDoes our friendship really mean nothing to you?â
You wouldnât necessarily call Wade Wilson a friend.
In fact, heâs honestly the worst neighbor youâve ever had.Â
Loud, obnoxious. Persuasive - the first night you met you had been banging on his door at three in the morning, yelling at him to shut up as music and a caterwauling voice blared through the shared wall.
Ten minutes later you were playing the drums on his late night session of Rock Band, using a banana and a wooden spoon in place of sticks. Only for Althea to stomp out of her room and shut everything down, scaring both of you out of your skins. Â
But sometimes, you think - remembering the times he came through for you, a shoulder to cry on, helping him this slump heâs been digging himself out of - he might just be the best, as well.
And maybe that was friendship, after all.Â
You sigh, leaning against the row of washers. Eyes flicking over him, a small smile tugging at your lips.
âYou do look good, Wade,â Thereâs a tilt of your head, the smile widening, âGlad you lost the toupee, that really wasnât your color.â
âAh, ah. Repurposed,â He chides, cupping his crotch, âYou wouldnât believe how much Iâve missed-â
âEw, stop.â Your face scrunches, a hand covering your eyes as you shield your vision, âWill you please just answer my question?â
He throws a handful of shirts in the washer, âWhich was...?â
Your head shakes - a hand on his arm as you reach for a glint of gold in the pile of clothes. Cringing as a handgun appears, held gingerly between thumb and forefinger as you set it on the side table.
âGood call,â He nods, âDry clean only.â
You can't help a laugh then, even as your hands brace on your hips, âI want to meet your roommate.â
He frowns, âYouâve met Blind Al.â
âJesus, Wade. Not Al." A hand waves, " I mean Mister Tall, Dark, and Brooding.â
Youâve seen the stranger in the hallways a few times in the month since heâs moved in. Scruffy and scowling the first time, a silent shadow behind Wadeâs endless chatter.Â
But in the weeks following, that look had softened. Youâd stopped by twice with cookies to welcome him, but every time youâve just gotten Al.
Not that you dislike Al, thatâs not it at all. Sheâs sweet enough to you when itâs not 3 a.m. or if Wade doesnât have her annoyed half to death.
But you certainly werenât harboring a crush on her. Maybe even secretly hoping that maybe the new neighbor will get a little lost and end up at your door, instead of his new place. Â
âOoh,â The syllables draw out - detergent flung in, before heâs leaning against the washer too, facing you. âYeah, Logan. He's great, got a mean âHugh Jackmanâ vibe, just without the singing. Youâd like him.â
Something like hope flutters in your belly, but then heâs raising a finger - wiggling it at you, âJust one question though. Whatâs in it for me?â
That has you scowling, âWhat do you mean? You owe me. I covered for you when you had that barqueue in the stairwell.â
âGod, that was great sausage.â Wade groans, thinking back, âMmm, but I think Peter covered for me.â
âWho do you think got Peter?â
âWell, I donât remember seeing you.â He shrugs.
âI was right-,â You pinch the bridge of your nose between thumb and forefinger, a sharp exhale of breath, âFine. If you do this for me, Iâll do that thing you keep asking me to do.â
Wade gasps gleefully, âYou mean youâll make the triple decker-â
â-chocolate caramel cheesecake chimichangas. Yes.â You finish with him, arms crossing over your chest, âYouâre lucky you heal fast because that should put you right into a food coma.â
âRight. Lucky me,â He smirks. A second as he thinks, before he snaps his fingers, âIâm having a little get-together tonight! You should come. Was gonna invite you anyway.â
The pounding in your head ratchets up at the thought that all this couldâve been avoided.
âLogan sleeps on the couch, though,â He adds, sagely, âSo just letting you know that if the two of you decide to get your fuck on in my bed, according to the state of New York I am legally allowed to join you.â
âThanks for the warning,â You grimace - even if youâre certain that cannot possibly be true, âBut I do have my own apartment.â
âOh, right.â Thereâs the faintest edge of disappointment in his tone, paired with a sigh.
You give him a sideways look, then.
âI saw Vanessa leaving yesterday. Things getting better?â
He sobers at that, eyes moving towards the sliver of a window. The glimpse of the street outside.
âYeah.â Wade manages, âYeah, I think so.â
There had once been a flicker of something. In-between your annoyance and exasperation, there were tendrils of tenderness. Long snuffed out, when you had seen just how banged up his heart was. How itâs always belonged to another.Â
You had gotten over it. Gotten to a place where seeing him now, like this, makes you smile.
âIâm really glad to hear that.âÂ
He smiles, then.
âThanks. Me too.â
âHey, hold on.â Wade darts in front of his roommate, a leg kicked up high to block the doorway, âWhere are you going? You canât go out.â
Logan scowls, an arm already shoved into his leather jacket, âSure I can.â
The blow against his shoulder might move a lesser man, but Wadeâs fingers just grip the frame even tighter, âBut I promised-, I got a friend that wants to meet you. There is some really important shit at stake here. I canât let you go.â
An eyebrow cocks, âCanât? I think we both know how that would go if you tried to stop me.â
It would be easy to get into this right here and now, but his suit is still in the dryer and heâs not about to spend another hour cleaning up blood.
âWait, wait, wait,â He throws a hand up, âArenât you listening to me? A girl wants to meet you. Sheâs hot, she has a job, and she has an apartment. Youâre only one outta three there. Canât you see what a good opportunity this is? This is totally in your favor!â
Logan scoffs, his tongue tucking against his teeth. Hesitating for just a second, but it's enough that Wade knows heâs got him.
âIâve met your friends,â He eventually acknowledges, âTheyâre good folk and all, but there isnât anyone there Iâd like to âget to know betterâ, yeah?â
âYou havenât met this one. She lives next door.â
The pause stretches longer this time. Dark eyes dart out into the hallway, and Wade can practically hear those rusted gears turning.
âApartment 16 or 18?â Logan finally rasps, his arms crossing.Â
Oh, heâs definitely got him. Just call him Wade Wilson, New Yorkâs own personal Cupid. New life goal - get his friends laid.Â
He nocks a mental arrow - aiming, and then firing with his answer.Â
â18.âÂ
Another beat passes, and then a sigh.Â
âAlright.â The leather sleeve slips from his arm, drooping in his fist.
âFive minutes. Thatâs all Iâm staying.â
Wadeâs fist pumps.Â
Bullseye, motherfucker.Â
The apartment is packed and itâs been well past the allotted five minutes. Loganâs been nursing a beer for the last fifteen, eyes flicking over the people heâs grown to know well.
Offering a tight, half-smile when the big man claps him on the back, followed by Opposites Attract. Almost tempted to find that damn dog, just to have something to do.Â
Or maybe, just bail all-together.
Starting to think this was all an elaborate prank. Some fucked up aspect of this Earth, unknown to him until now.
Heâs too old for this shit. If he heads for the bedroom now, he might make it out the fire escape before anyone notices.
Logan is still entertaining this new thread of thought until he hears his name - called out over whatever fuck-face bullshit boy-band music Wadeâs been playing.Â
Ambiance, his ass.
The muscles of his crossed arms flex. Catching the way his roommate hauls a girl across the floor - the look of panic on her face as she tosses a container onto the nearest surface.
Wade hadnât been lying, after all. It was Apartment 18 - that was about as much as he knew about you.
Other than the color of your eyes. The smell of your perfume in the hall. Your hair, your schedule - waking in the mornings to hear your door opening at 5 a.m., five days a week.
A baker. A damn good one, from the bits of cookie heâs snuck when no one was home.Â
Had never thought to introduce himself, because heâs been through all this before. Knows better than to reach out in the first place - still nursing the old wound of heartache, one that still flares to life in his chest.
Better not to hope, or even think, at all.Â
You stumble when he lets go, and Loganâs hands only curl tighter. Afraid to touch, now that youâre so close.Â
A pretty young thing compared to him. This was a fucking stupid idea, his eyes darting away as Wade claps, his hands spreading wide.Â
âLogan,â Wadeâs tone is cordial, as if discussing the weather, âThis is our neighbor, Sugar. She bakes a mean penis cake and likes emotionally unavailable men.â
A dejected sigh as he regards you, âWhich is why itâs never worked out between us. I am just too available.â
Penis cake?
Logan shoots you a sideways look, an eyebrow cocked. Caught off guard by this unexpected intro, and it seems you are the same - gauging by the way your mouth drops open.Â
Your face swimming with regret, as you hiss, âOh my god. Wade. It was one time. Why do you have to put it like that?â
Wadeâs smile widens, his tone still innocent, âJust skipping over the âgetting-to-know-youâs, so you can know if youâre compatible.â
Already pivoting to face Logan with a little wink, his own scowl already deepening. Something like nerves flickering to life - as he wonders if this will all be over before it ever begins.
âAnd this is Logan. Heâs from another Earth, is two-hundred years old, and has a metal dong.â
Jesus Christ.Â
Loganâs teeth grit, before he snarls, âItâs not made of metal-â
Out of the corner of his eye, catches the curious dip of your gaze. Past the folded twist of his arms, the flannel, down to his thick belt buckle.
A knock rings out then, interrupting him from any further clarification.
âOoh! Door,â Wade thumbs over his shoulder, âGo on now, weâve got some good energy going here. Sugar and spice, I love it.â
A spin on his heel, and heâs leaving them alone. Silence a lingering companion for a long moment, before Logan turns.
âNice to meet you.â He seethes, jaw working as he shoots daggers at Wadeâs back. A hand extended - heâd manage that much at least.
Waiting for you to make an excuse and run, but all you do is fit your hand into his. Soft and strong and a near perfect fit.
Logan doesnât touch people much anymore unless itâs a hand around a throat, or claws buried deep into a chest. Had almost forgotten what it was like, even if this meeting is close to his own personal version of hell.
âNice to finally meet you, too.â Your smile is wry. Hands still clasped a moment longer, until heâs withdrawing.Â
Your hands shove into your back pockets. The tilt of a head as you regard him, and he lets his eyes meet yours.Â
Theyâre pretty, like the rest of you. Captivating even, if he could use such a word, and Wadeâs words ring out in his head.Â
She wants to meet you.
Heâs wondering if thatâs still true. Maybe youâre wondering the same, with the way you look at him.Â
âSo,â You begin, awkwardly - another unconscious flick of your eyes,âHow does-â
âUh-uh.â Loganâs head shakes. Heâs picked up a couple things living with Wade. Never used to be a bargaining man, but he has to admit it has its uses.Â
âIf you wanna know, you gotta go first.âÂ
He hates you.
He must, with the way heâs scowling. Thighs spread wide as he sits on the couch you had gestured to, fingers in a vice grip around the bottle. No doubt plotting a dozen ways to ditch you the second he can.
Who wouldnât, with a meeting like this? You could kill Wade, cheeks burning as you sink into the worn cushions next to him.
That is, until your knee knocks against his. The muscles in his thigh flexing - but Logan lets it rest, instead of pulling away.Â
âYou gonna-?â His voice is gruff, a low rasp that makes goosebumps raise across your skin.Â
âUh, sure.â Your fingers twist, âWhich part did you want to hear about?â
His eyebrows lift. Those dark eyes beneath, almost a hint of amusement in them.
âRight,â The little laugh that bubbles from you is self-conscious, âWell, I donât really like emotionally unavailable men, they just have a habit of finding me.â
His voice is low, âHow would Wade know that?â
âMm, how would he know about your-?â Your eyes flicker down for the third time, and he shifts.Â
âYou first.â
âAlright.â You huff, but youâre smiling now. Some of your discomfort easing.Â
Logan is even more handsome than you had thought. You like the way his eyes dart away, only to come back and linger.Â
Itâs starting to make you think that maybe itâs not dislike that has so much of him hidden away. Maybe itâs just been a long time since someone tried to peel any of him back.Â
Maybe heâs as nervous as you are.
âWell, heâs had to scare an ex or two away.â You shrug, âHe only knows because I told him. And the cake, oh-, that was him, too.â
You turn then, to face him. A shoulder brushing the arm he has thrown across the back of the couch, a flicker in his eyes as you get comfortable beside him.
âWell, Wade had gotten ripped in half a couple years ago,â You nose wrinkles, a wave of your hand, âAnd it all like, has to grow back, right? Itâs so creepy.â
Logan grimaces at your explanation, and you wonder if he understands. You think he must - you had thought he was like Wade, in some ways.Â
Different. Special.
âWell, he uh, finished growing everything in,â You make a sweeping gesture over your lower half, âAnd the next year to celebrate his dickiversary, he ordered a penis cake from my shop.â
âHis⊠dickiversary.â Logan repeats slowly.
The heat is back in your cheeks, but you nod, âYeah, because it like, it came back and all. And he paid in cash, I couldnât say no.â
Thereâs the smallest twitch of Loganâs lips, and it feels like a victory.
âRight. What flavor was it?â
Your smile widens with relief, âStrawberries and cream. It was so good. Iâll have to make it for you sometime.â
A second before you cringe, adding, âI mean, a normal one. NotâŠâ
He hums then, close to a laugh. Â
âSure. You do that.â
You smile, letting your shoulder bump his, âAnd with that⊠I think itâs your turn.â
The bit of humor in his expression flattens. A searching look thrown your way, before he inhales a breath.
Setting it free.Â
âIâm a mutant.â
Logan waits there, as if expecting something. You only nod, thinking of the ones you know. Colossus, Ellie, Yukio, Domino. Wade.Â
âWade said you were similar to him. I had assumed-â You encourage, waiting.
âRight,â He seems relieved, some of the tension ebbing, âMy powers are regenerative, like his. But unlike him, I have these-â
Thereâs the jerk of his wrist, and three sharp metal claws sprout from between his knuckles. Your gasp is caught in your throat as you cling to his flannel shirt - the surprise bleeding into worry.Â
They glint in the light, as his fingers flex.Â
âAdamantium instead of bones. All of me is like this.â
The claws sheath themselves inside him again. His wounds smoothing over seconds later, as he scrubs his knuckles across his jeans, wiping away blood.Â
Offering out his hand, after. Letting your grip unwind from his shirt, and press against his skin instead. Feeling the tendons in his hand, his wrist. The skeleton beneath utterly unyielding, a weight to his limb that is so unlike your own.
âMetalâŠâ You trail off, as pieces click into place, âI get it now. So does Wade really think thereâs like, an actual bone-?â
Logan huffs again, âGuess so.â
You laugh then. A thought sobering you after, as a fingertip drifts up to the dip between his fingers.Â
âBut doesnât that hurt?âÂ
It makes you wince to even think about it. Much less how casually they sprung from him, no different than breathing.Â
He shrugs, and itâs heartbreaking.
âDoesnât even phase me anymore.â
âAnd, the two hundred years,â Another facet you put together out loud, âYouâre still alive because you keep healing? Will it be that way forever?â
His hand flexes in your grip.
âNot forever. Apparently my powers will run out, at some point.â His eyes meet yours, âThe Logan in this world is dead. Wade pulled me from another.â
Your brow furrows - always trying to keep up with the snippets that Wade has told you across the years - stories about time-traveling and mutants and even how he came to be. But this seems too deep. Surely Logan must be joking.
âAnother world, huh?â You ask, head tilting - trying your best to roll with it, âWonât they miss you in yours?â
Only now does his face falter. That sharp mask cracking, as his hand pulls from yours. Resting again on the back edge of the couch - his answer low and rough.Â
âNo. I donât think so.â
Another jolt racks through your heart. You donât know him know him yet, but you already canât believe that could possibly be true. Your fingers fan out, hovering - before it folds into a fist.
âWell then, Iâm glad youâre here.â
He doesnât reply.Â
The room is darker now, dim with the setting of the sun. Street lights outside pouring in a golden beam that cuts across his face.Â
His eyes are hazel, you can see that now. A fading rim of green spilling into the brown, beneath the near-permanent furrow of his eyebrows.Â
Yours caught in the glow of the flamingo string lights that curl out from the kitchen, stapled to the walls.
He breaks the silence, the words coming slowly.Â
âLet me ask you one more thing.âÂ
âSure. You know some of my worst secrets already.â You smile, a shoulder lifting.
His hand twitches, where it rests near your shoulder. The tip of a finger ghosting against skin.
Just the slightest brush but it feels like it radiates out, lingering after.
âWhyâd you tell Wade you wanted to meet me?âÂ
His voice is still low, rough. But itâs lost that sharp edge. The combination has your stomach tied up in knots, suddenly more nervous that youâve been the whole night.
Surely he must know?Â
âWellâŠâ You hedge. Itâs your turn to look away, but then thereâs the brush of his fingers again.
âBecause I did want to meet you.â You admit, âYou, you seemed like someone I wanted to get to know. In whatever capacity youâd like.â
âIs that right, Sugar?â Logan husks, and the nickname sounds even sweeter on his tongue, stealing your breath.
All you can do is nod, as his eyes darken.Â
Voices rise behind you, ripping you out of this little bubble youâve found yourself in. Nearly forgetting just how many people are here, how many eyes have been glancing your way since youâve arrived.
âNot strip poker Wade, please.â The rough rumbling plea of Colossusâs voice rings out above the others, âYou never wear anything under the suit-â
You didnât even realize when he had changed, but he had - patches of bare skin on his ass showing through the holes. Your nose scrunches, before you turn back to realize that Loganâs eyes are still on you.
Dropping when your tongue peeks out to wet your lips - your words coming out in a soft hush.Â
âYou want to get out of here?â
You want him. You can only hope that he might just want you, too.
The corner of his lip twitches.
âThought youâd never ask.â
Itâs strange to have someone like Logan in your space. You can remember the last time youâve wanted someone here.
His fingers still entwined with yours, from where you had reached back for him. Leading him through the dim corners of the room.
Thinking you had made it, only for the rousing cheers to rise when you had cracked the door open to slip through.
His grip tightening when you made to tug your hand free, in an urge to press it against burning cheeks. Letting you fumble with one hand, to open the lock next door.
Itâs quieter here. A low echo of the music next door, as the darkness wraps around you again.
Here, his fingers move, but itâs only to skim up your wrist. To tug you between him and the front door, until your back presses against it.Â
His nose brushes yours as he steps into your space, your lips already parting. Holding himself there for a moment, inhaling the scent of you as his arm braces above your head.
Leaving you to be the one that closes the gap. The tilt of your head and the press of your lips against his.
A rough hum when your arms wrap around his neck, fingers buried in his hair. His hand gripping at your waist, pulling your hips against his.
Tugging and pushing. A messy path from the front door through the small living room - a mirror-image of the apartment next door.
Through to the bedroom, wandering hands and the brush of his tongue against yours as he deepens the needy kiss. Until his knees are hitting the edge of your bed, and heâs letting you nudge him back onto the mattress.
He brings you with him - your hips cradling his as you settle yourself astride him. Hands flatten against his chest as you rock down - drawing a rough, mumbled âfuckâ.
Grinding yourself down where heâs hard, the curve of his cock straining against his jeans. Letting your hands follow, as his own cup your ass. Squeezing, before slipping to press the heel of his hand against the seam at your clit.
You moan into his mouth, as your fingers curl around him. Eyes blown wide when you pull back, scooting your hips down.Â
Itâs here that he comes back to himself.Â
Going tense as you fit yourself between his thighs, fingers at this belt as the other still cups him.
âYou shouldnât want this.â He rasps, those eyes glinting in the dark, âA man like me. You know that, right?â
Propping himself up on an elbow, so he can see your expression. So you can see the way his jaw grits, nostrils flaring.Â
Itâs a warning, wrapped up in silk. A last ditch effort to scare you away - knowing that once he has you, he wonât want to stop.
Your fingers slow - his zipper half-undone, baring skin and a dark shadow of hair beneath.Â
The other pulling away, âYou want me to stop?âÂ
He catches your wrist, jerking your hand back. His hips bucking into your palm, grinding himself into your touch.Â
âThe last thing I want to fucking do is stop.â Itâs almost a growl, âBut on my Earth, I-â
You sigh then, impatient, âLogan, this Earth isnât all that great either. I lost five years of my life to the blip.â
He frowns, not understanding - but your head shakes as you continue, âIâm tired of being too scared to take chances. Iâve been trying to live each day to the fullest, and Iâd like to end this one with you.â
And out of everyone - Logan knows a little something about second chances.
âYeah,â He manages - the grip of his fist leaves you, âYeah, okay.â
"Thank you,â You answer primly, just as you finish yanking the zipper down.Â
His hand beats you in the race to ease himself out, fingers curling around the base. You canât help it - you inhale a breath at the sight of him.
Heavy, with the way the flushed tip bobs in his grip. Thick enough that youâre already wondering if youâre going to be able to take him.Â
The huff he makes turns into a groan as you start small - engulfing the leaking head with your lips. The first inch turns into another as his hips lift, feeding his cock into your waiting mouth.Â
Only when heâs halfway inside you, bumping against your throat, does his hand drop. Letting you replace it with your own - squeezing, as drool slicks up his shaft. Your head bobbing in time with the twist of your fist.
That brief hesitance is quickly forgotten. Fingers brush at your cheek, curling around the base of your head as he guides you.
Leaving you eager for more. Another hissed groan when your mouth leaves him, your hand loosening as you strip your clothes away.
âOh fuck yes,â He coaxes, when he realizes what youâre doing, âLet me see you, baby.âÂ
Your shirt and pants left to pool on the floor. A second of boldness as you unclasp your bra next, leaving you in your panties as you focus on his cock again.Â
A bitten-back moan when your tongue slips across his swollen shaft - an low throb between your thighs as you rub them together, clenching around nothing. Resisting the urge to slip your hand beneath the hem to ease the ache.Â
Instead, your keep your hands on him. Goosebumps raising as your nails scratch against the deep v of muscle at his hips. The others working him into your mouth, as he slowly comes more undone.Â
His hips flex with each bob of your head, lips parted as he pants. The words a rough mumble, becoming almost desperate.Â
âThatâs it sweetheart.â
Another moan when you take him deep, hollowing your cheeks as you suck, âOh fuck, gonna fill that pretty mouth.â
His hand cups your jaw, holding you steady as he bucks into your mouth. Those dark eyes fixed on you in wonder, all that pretty skin bared for him to touch, to taste. Heâs mesmerizing like this - the weight of gaze. Jaw slack with pleasure, eyes aflame.
You did this to him.Â
It sends something warm flooding through you, as his eyelashes flutter. The tipping back of his head, muscles ticking in his cheek as his teeth ground down.Â
A sound still slips between them, as he floods your mouth with the next flex of his hips. Pulsing between your lips as you swallow him down, a choked sound ripping from his chest when you cup his sack to gently squeeze out every last drop.Â
Logan melts into the mattress after, an arm thrown over his eyes as he catches his breath. His gaze focusing on you when he feels you squirm - dark, and hungry.
A lithe stretch of muscles as he moves - legs easing from beneath you.Â
âHands and knees,â He commands, head tipping towards the bed next to him, as he rolls off. Kicking off his jeans as you listen, watching over a shoulder as the flannel and white tank underneath joins your clothes on the floor.
Your eyes widen at how toned he is - muscles rippling, the bed dipping as he fits himself behind you.
His broad hand at the small of your back, pushing your torso down against the mattress. A pleased hum then, fingers trailing just along the elastic edge of your underwear.
âCould smell how much she needed this.â The tips of two press against the damp fabric between your thighs, making you gasp, âEven next door. You want it that bad?â
It should be embarrassing that he could tell how much you desired him, but at the moment all you can think about is him touching you more.
âYes,â You agree, âPlease, Logan.â
âSo fuckinâ polite,â The fingers withdraw; but only so his nose can replace them. A ragged inhale, just before his tongue drags against your clothed slit.
A groan against your skin as you cry out, before a finger hooks around the fabric, baring you for him to taste.
The heat of his tongue flattens against you - lapping at where you drip with need, a rough rumble in his chest.Â
âSweet, too.â Another flick of his tongue, âYour name. âs fitting.â
You canât manage words. Only his name, muffled against the sheets as your fists twist in them. Back arched as you resist the urge to grind yourself against his tongue, as it flicks against your clit.
Itâs messy, how he eats you. You donât think youâve even had someone take you like this. Hungry, desperate even, as he devours you. The rumble of a groan against your cunt as his tongue delves inside you, stretching you open. Letting your slick smear into his beard, with how close he presses his mouth.
That need inside you thrumming. Winding tighter as he yanks your panties down your thighs. His palm flattening against your ass, holding you open as he licks you from clit to hole, then higher. Humming as you squeak, when his tongue flattens against your tight rim.Â
A thick finger nudging against you then, as his tongue dips back to your clit. Thereâs no resistance as it slips deeper, into slick walls that clamp down around him. Itâs what you needed - that little bit more.
Unable to help rocking into the crook of his finger now. Whining when a second joins it, spearing deep and curling. Dragging against your walls, loud and wet and filthy with each plunge.Â
Your whimpers only grow louder. Needier, as his lips wrap around your clit. Fingers pounding deep, stretching you out. Leaving you babbling, your words slipping together.Â
âDonât fucking stop.â Tears prick at your eyes, each breath a rattling gasp, âOh my god youâre gonna make me come-â
He has you gushing, with the next flick of his tongue. A pleased groan as he feels your pussy tighten around his fingers, hearing the wail that is muffled into your pillows. That sharp pace slowing, his thumb replacing his tongue to draw your orgasm out until your legs are shaking.Â
His fingers sticky when they pull from you, only to slip between his lips - tongue curling around his knuckles, sucking them clean.
It leaves you floating above yourself. You canât remember ever coming this hard, even by yourself. Only the tintest thread of disappointment as you drift, and itâs only that you wonât get the pleasure of his cock filling you tonight.
You wouldâve liked to see what he can do with the rest of him.Â
Perhaps you can convince him to stay until morning.
But he moves behind you, instead. His knee pressing against yours, spreading your legs further. The rhythmic shuffle of skin against skin, as his hand slips from between his lips to fist around his cock.Â
âTell me I can fuck you.â Itâs not a plea, not with the harsh rasp of his voice. But itâs as close as youâve heard, as he swipes the tip against your leaking pussy.
Smearing your slick on him, teasing at your waiting hole.
You donât know how heâs hard again, but at the moment you really donât care. Not sure if youâve ever felt a need like this, your back arching further as you present yourself to him.Â
A twist of your neck, so your eyes can meet his.Â
âFuck me, Logan.âÂ
He groans, broad hands squeezing at your ass. Slipping up to sink his fingers into the flesh at your hips. Holding you steady as he lines himself up.Â
Your breath held, when you feel his cock start to breach you - muscles stringing tight.
âRelax, sweetheart,â He grits out, though not unkindly, âYou can take it.â
Trying to hold himself back from filling you with a single thrust, with the way youâre already gripping him.
Easing himself into your heat. Two inches forward and then one back, and with each one you think youâll feel the press of his thighs against yours. A low whine as your cunt makes room for him, that sharp stretch as it feels like heâs reaching into your belly.
Feeling full when he finally is flush, the weight of his sack kissing against your clit. His shoulders following the curve of your back, as a hand slips up to plant next to your head.
âFeels fucking incredible,â Itâs mumbled against your skin, almost as if it hadnât meant to say it.Â
âMm,â You grin, your face tipping up to his, âShouldâve met you weeks ago.â
He smirks, a low sound in his throat as his mouth presses to yours. Starting a slow rhythm that drags his cock against your walls. Slipping until heâs halfway out, only to sheath himself again. Pushing the air from your lungs as he flattens himself, knees digging into the bed as your thigh spread wider - forcing him deeper.
Itâs almost too much.Â
You hand shoots out, reaching. Wrapping around his wrist, nails biting against his skin.Â
It feels like heâs surrounding you. Each thrust a heavy weight that presses you into the bed. Splitting you open, until all you can do is squirm beneath him.
That pressure in your belly building again, as his hips pound. His breath, hot and panting in your ear as he chases his own end.
âFuck, Logan.â You sob, âHarder-â
His tendons flex under your grip. Knuckles pressing flat against the sheets as he makes a rough sound in his throat.Â
Those claws unsheathing with his next thrust. Punching down into your mattress. Anchoring as he loses himself to the feel of you beneath him.
How tight and wet and warm you are, your arousal still sweet on his tongue. Fighting the urge to sink his teeth into your throat, as everything tightens up inside him.
âSweetheart.â Itâs a warning, rasped out.Â
âCome in me,â You whine, âWanna feel you.â
He does growl then, at the thought of filling you to the brim, until he's leaking out of your pretty little pussy. Hips snapping faster, pinning you to the bed as he ruts into you. Each squeak of the bed paired with the sharp rip of fabric as his claws dig in.Â
Feeling how your body strings tight beneath him, how you clench down in anticipation. Wanting to feel you once more, before he gives in to his own desires.
âCome on, baby,â Itâs hushed, murmured against your skin, âFuckinâ give it to me-â
The sharp point of a canine scraping against your skin, his groan rough and throaty in your ear.Â
Your fingers work down to wedge themselves between your thighs. The tips brushing where youâre speared open, before circling your clit like his tongue had.
He has you mindless. Fucked out - that soft glow from your earlier orgasm shining bright as he tips you towards a second.
Burning at that tightly wound thread inside you, until the ends fray, and then snap.Â
It has you coming with his next thrust. A wail ripped from you as he buries himself deep, feeling the way your pussy clenches down around him.Â
Fingers still swirling, drawing out the deep pulses that fan out from your core as your toes curl, vision going hazy.
âThatâs it, sweetheart,â He rasps, those sharp thrust slowing to a sloppy grind, âMake a fucking mess for me, there you go-â
Panting, as he groans. Another roll of his hips before heâs coming with you - teeth bruising skin as they sink into your shoulder. The sound he makes is broken as he spills into you, muscles clenching with each pulse that paints your walls. Â
Marking you thoroughly with teeth and come, the saw of his hips slowing until you both finally go still. A breath finally caught.Â
Blissed out, when he rolls you both to the side. His thighs still mapping yours, cock still notched deep. A thick arm thrown across your waist, his breath ragged in your ear as he catches his breath.
Your fingers drift, as you bask in your afterglow. Dipping into the rips in your mattress, knuckle deep.
Thereâs a grunt as you wiggle, the words low in your ear, âIâll get you another, sweetheart. Just lost control for a moment.â
The thought doesnât bother you as much as youâd think. In fact, you wouldnât mind if happened again.
Only as your imagination runs wild, do you hear the muffled moan from the brick wall behind you.
âFuck, thatâs good.â
Dramatic and drawn out, paired with faint rhythmic noise.Â
A beat - before you hear mumbled protesting. The voice of someone talking with their mouth full, âNo. Back the fuck off Peter, Iâm not going to share.âÂ
Eating. The fucker was eating his end of the bargain, ear pressed to the wall.
The next louder, âAlright, pay up everyone, Operation âGet Sugar Some Sugarâ was a success!â
You grimace, eyes rolling. Logan grunts behind you, the words mumbled out sleepily.
âWish I could sew that goddamn mouth shut.â
Thereâs a faint âthey already tried that!â before Loganâs fist bangs on the wall, shutting him up.
But you canât help the smile. Your fingers fitting between the ones that rest just below your breasts, squeezing.
âHeâs not so bad,â You admit, âWade, I mean.â
Logan groans, âDonât say his name while Iâm fucking you.â
âYouâre-â You start - but then you can feel him.
Still hard - as his hips cant slowly against yours. Your joined hands slip up to cup a breast - as his lips press against your neck, stubble scraping you skin.
âAgain?â You breathe, disbelieving that heâd be up for a third time - your hips rocking back to meet his. The sound lewd with how he drips from you - but it only has him grinding himself deeper, âYou sure youâre two hundred?â
âRegenerative powers, sweetheart.â Logan husks, the flash of teeth with a knowing smirk.
âCanât say it doesnât come with perks.â
I used to have the biggest fucking crush on wolverine, haha - so fun to watch a new movie with him!! đđ thank you so much for reading! And please me know if you'd like to read any more for him! (like more one-shots,etc!)
#phew this got away from me - i can't remember the last time I wrote this much in 2 days#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#logan howlett x you#wolverine smut#logan howlett#james logan howlett x reader#xmen x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x f!reader
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MY MISTAKES WERE MADE FOR YOU - L.H.
Summary: You lost him. He lost you. What if there's a universe where you find each other?
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Female Reader
Warnings: Smut 18+ only, Angst (with happy ending), Hurt/Comfort, Touch starved Logan, Unprotected sex (with major feelings), Emotional intimacy (we all know how much he needs this)
A/N: Starting the year off with some good ol' angst. Worst!Logan is such an intricately complex character, I know that man would just crumble at the slightest bit of affection. Hope you enjoy (aka shed some tears)! Title creds to The Last Shadow Puppets.
MASTERLIST
"Do you think we're together in every universe?"
The late afternoon sun slanted through the blinds, striping the rumpled sheets with gold. Logan held you close, his arm an anchor across your waist, fingertips just barely tracing the curve of your body. Dust motes danced lazily in the beams, the light warming the sculpted planes of his chest beneath your cheek.
"There's more than one?" he murmured back.
"You have claws coming out your hands, but you don't believe there's another world just like ours?"
Your fingers found his beard, all silver and entirely Logan. He'd once fretted over the greying strands, scowling whenever he caught his reflection. But your loving reassurance - along with some lighthearted teasing - had eased his worries; he never frowned at the sight of it again. It belonged to him, just as you belonged to him.
"Never thought about it." His whisper, gentle as a caress, lingered in the space between matching heartbeats and entwined limbs. "Everythin' I love's right here."
The clouds weep the tears you hold back. Rain slicks the granite of his headstone, chilling your fingers as you trace the etched letters of his name. Logan Howlett.
Today marks another year. Another year without his warmth, without his quiet affection, without him. Yet he remains everywhere and nowhere, a mere ghost in the hollowness of your soul.
You were the calmness to his storm; and he, the mighty current that held you steady. Where your heart was an open book, Logan's was a fortress. The world had hardened him, leaving him wary and guarded. And somehow, you found a way inside - not by battering down his walls, but with patience and unwavering devotion.
He'd lived a life where kindness was a forgotten language, where vulnerability was a fatal flaw. Yet he let you in. As naturally as the sun rises each morning, as inevitably as the moon draws the ocean's breath, he let you in. His love wasn't often spoken, but it was lived.
It was his calloused hand, scarred and strong, that held your chin as he leaned in to kiss you. His gruff voice that softened with a deep reverence when he breathed your name. And his rare, almost shy smile that revealed a sense of peace he found only in you.
Lost in these memories, you barely register the shift in the air. A shadow falls across the inscription on his headstone and you feel the familiar pull of his presence - yet it's wrong. So terribly, and heartbreakingly wrong. The scent of cigar smoke, the rough texture of his leather jacket, the weariness of his posture - it's all there, a cruel reminder of the man you loved. But they're not the same.
"Not now, Logan," you choke out, eyes squeezing shut against the sudden rush of tears.
His gaze, heavy with a sorrow that mirrors your own, cuts through the pouring rain. The need to reach out and offer comfort becomes a searing ache in his chest, a tightening in his throat that swallows him whole. He knew you'd be here; Wade had told him what today was. But the thought of you alone, braving the crushing weight of your loss, was unbearable. "It's late. Storm's comin' in," he whispers.
"I don't care."
The streetlamp above flickers weakly, its light a trembling finger pointing to the raw pain that pools in your eyes. He doesn't try to argue. Grief is a dear enemy; he's wrestled with its suffocating weight and understood the desire to remain tethered to the echoes of a life now lost.
So, he stays. A silent companion beside you, sharing the cold rain that soaks your clothes, the thunder that cracks overhead, and the loneliness that binds you together in this desolate moment.
It hurts you, overwhelmingly so. He looks just like him - the same rugged lines, the same weathered hands, the same slump to his shoulders. But he's a phantom limb, a missing note in a melody, a haunting reminder of a touch you'll never feel again. It's almost enough to make you laugh, a hollow, broken sound that doesn't quite reach your lips.
When Wade first broke the news, it felt like a punchline to some sick joke. "Another Logan?" you scoffed, rolling your eyes as he remained uncharacteristically serious. "This one's different," he said quietly, "He lost his... well, he lost his you."
You hadn't believed him, not until Logan cautiously stepped out of the bedroom, and the absurd reality of Wade's words struck you hard. The impact was immediate: a sharp, stabbing pain that reopened old wounds. Since then, you both walked a careful tightrope around each other. Much like two ships passing in the night, swept by the same tides, yet forever separated by the vast ocean of heartache.
The heavy silence holds its breath as your sob breaks free. And another, and another, until you're shaking from the force of it all. It's then, seeing you so utterly distraught, that he can no longer resist. The barriers, the invisible walls that had kept you at a distance, vanish like a mirage.
Hesitantly, he gathers you in his arms, your heartbeat thumping wildly against his chest. With slow, measured steps, he carries you home - a bittersweet ache settling deep within. He never got to hold her like this. His you.
The door closes behind him, the relentless downpour waning to a hushed murmur. Logan doesn't release you immediately, selfishly holding on a second longer before lowering you onto the couch. Moving quickly, he returns with a towel, carefully draping it around your shivering form.
His hand lingers, almost of its own volition, a feather-light brush against your cheek as he tucks away a stray hair. He regards you fondly, his gaze kind and searching as he murmurs, "It'll get easier, I promise."
The air crackles with an unspoken longing. Sighing softly, you savour the heat of his touch. And in the stillness of the moment, the question you'd been burning to ask, the one that had been clawing at your mind since you laid eyes on him, simply slips out. "How did you lose her?"
Logan exhales wearily. The memory is a healing scar, one he still prods at in the darkest hours of the night. Guilt, thick and suffocating, flares in his throat. He'd spent years lost in a haze of anger and alcohol, trying to outrun the shame until he finally stopped. The running ceased, the chase ended, and in the aftermath, he found a fragile peace, slowly mending the broken pieces within.
As he speaks, the sheer extent of his agony draws you closer. Instinctively, you grasp his hand, fingers intertwining with ease. "They took her away from me. Sheâ" he trails off, taking a deep breath. "She didn't know how much I loved her."
How could she not have known? you wonder. Love simply radiates from him. It reminds you so much of your own Logan, of the same fire roaring beneath the surface. All intense and bright without uttering a single word. "She knew," you offer quietly.
He doesn't know who initiates the movement, a nearly imperceptible lean. Perhaps it's a silent understanding between two souls craving solace in the face of immense loss. Or perhaps it's something else entirely.
Whatever the catalyst, your lips meet.
The taste of salt and sorrow floods his senses. The first touch is hesitant, a tentative kiss that sends a jolt of unexpected electricity through his very being. It's wrong. He knows it's wrong. But logic falters, crumbling beneath the soft siege of your affections, a yearning he's powerless to fight.
Over time, the need for genuine connection had become a faded photograph in the back of his mind. The colours muted, the edges frayed. But this? The feeling of you against his mouth, all eager and urgent, is a revelation. And your fingers, raking through his hair, loosen the tight coils of tension he'd so long forgotten.
Logan breaks away, only momentarily, before guiding you onto his lap. He tilts forward, reconnecting with your lips. This time much, much slower. It's sweet, achingly so, imbued with a hope that maybe - just maybe, you'll be okay. This is okay.
His hands, still resting on your waist, begin to wander beneath your clothes. Heat from your skin presses against his cheek as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck, his breath ghosting over your pulse point. Leaning back slightly, he traces the line of your jaw, urging you to meet his gaze.
A question hangs in his eyes, a seeking of permission, one that you answer with a nod. Then, inch by inch, he eases your sweater over your shoulders, kissing along each newly exposed area. He smiles as you unbutton his shirt in turn, nipping his bicep playfully.
There's no rush; it's all a gentle unfolding, a deliberate exploration of one another. When skin finally meets skin, it's with a sigh of shared relief, a feeling of coming home.
His arousal is painstakingly clear, the tip of his cock teasing your entrance. Logan watches as you lower yourself onto him, barely sinking onto his length before a moan spills from your mouth, a mixture of pleasure and a sharp, fleeting sting.
He can tell it hurts, the slight wince in your expression not escaping his notice. Concern knots in his stomach and he immediately stills, hands gripping your hips, as if to pull you back.
"Easy, darlin'," he mumbles, "Tell me if it's too much, okay? We don't have toâ"
A growl tears through his mouth, raw and involuntary, as you fully take him in. The tightness around his cock is undeniably satisfying and utterly profound. He clenches his jaw, fighting back another groan, the intensity almost too much to bear.
Then you begin to move. Carefully shifting your hips, a rocking motion that draws him deeper as you thrust in and out. Friction builds with each movement and Logan can't resist the impulse to fuck up into you, his body responding with a desire to be closer.
The rhythm quickens, becoming more insistent, the earlier tenderness giving way to a more fiery, more visceral need. He matches your pace, then takes the lead in an almost demanding fashion.
And then he feels it - a dampness on his shoulder, the subtle hitch of your breath as you seek refuge in the curve of his neck. The tremble of your sighs, his name a choked plea from your lips, tells him everything.
He slows down, his movements gentle. With a light sweep of his thumb, he wipes away the tears trailing down your cheek. "I know, sweet girl, I know," he speaks softly, whispering apologies and sweet nothings as he kisses your temple, "'m here for you. Just let go for me, baby."
The tension drains from your muscles, Logan smiles as you respond to him again. A newfound energy pumps through his body, he thrusts once, then twice, cursing as your gasps grow louder.
The sound of your pleasure is intoxicating. He can feel you squeezing around him, your breath coming in short bursts, each exhale a hot rush against his skin. He's so close, he can almost taste it, a dizzying swell waiting to consume you both. "Fuck, darlin'. Could get used to this," he spits out.
With his free hand, he reaches down, finding the throbbing nub of your clit. The faint pressure, the circling motion of his fingertips, is the final push that sends you tumbling over the edge. A strangled cry breaks free as your body arches towards him, your muscles clenching and releasing in waves, drawing thick ropes of his cum deeper inside you.
Logan pulls out, the warmth of your presence still heavy in his mind. He doesn't speak, not wanting to fracture the delicate intimacy of the moment, instead studying you in awe. The rise and fall of your chest, the curve of your lips, the sheen of sweat on your forehead - it all seems impossibly perfect.
Maybe this wasn't a mistake. Maybe this was the first step towards healing. A journey taken together, hand in hand, through the wreckage of your past, towards a future that feels a little less bleak. The thought settles in his heart, a quiet promise that perhaps, together, you can find your way back to the light.
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#logan howlett angst#old man logan x reader#logan howlett fluff#deadpool and wolverine#logan x you#logan howlett imagine#wolverine x you#wolverine#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine imagine#wolverine fluff#wolverine angst#old man logan#old man logan smut#old man logan fluff#old man logan angst#logan x reader#logan howlett xmen#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan x f!reader#logan x female reader#logan howlett x f!reader#wolverine x female reader#wolverine x f!reader#logan howlett fanfiction#worst!logan x reader
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new rules
pairing: ex!Worst!Logan Howlett x f!reader word count: 2.7k summary: You've been broken up for long enough. It shouldn't be this hard to stay away. content/warnings: smut, angst, Logan's a disaster alcoholic, suicidal ideation, unhealthy relationships, big dick a/n: I didn't expect the Logan bug to bite me, but here I am, horny for this old man, writing a songfic in the year of our lord two thousand twenty four. Dua Lipa's "New Rules" came on shuffle and I needed to make it about our big boy. Thank you to the loml @ozarkthedog for being the best human alive and also for hyping me up, reading it thru, and telling me "it made me actually want to try to fix him" đ
Youâre in your pajamas, toothbrush in hand and moisturizer shining on your face, when the screen of your phone lights up. You wince when you see the contact name.
DO NOT PICK UP
You watch as it rings out, and you exhale when the comfort of the black screen returns.
And then it lights up again.
Just ignore it. Just ignore it.
As youâre spitting your toothpaste into the sink, the screen lights up again, DO NOT PICK UP flashing across.
Itâs a bad idea. Itâs always a bad idea.Â
But as it lights up a fourth time, you hit accept. As you bring the phone to your ear, you already know what youâre going to say; you need to stop calling like this; have you been drinking?; this isnât going to happen againâ
And then you hear his voice. Itâs just a single word, and comes out more as a croak than anything else.
âHi, baby-â
Just like the first time. The third. The five hundredth. It makes you fucking melt, makes your body heat and your stomach flip.
âHi Logan.â
â
âItâs been too long, sweetheart-âÂ
âYeah, well-â you sigh. You know how this always goes. âI told you not to call.â
âBut you answered.âÂ
Even over the line he sounds smug. You wish you could punch him, god, if only. But you knew from past experience that his adamantium bones and entirely unfair regenerative powers would leave him perfectly unblemished, while you nursed a broken hand.
âSooo-,â you venture, âIs there something you need?â
It was better to play clueless, you reasoned; You werenât gonna jump the gun. You would make him spell it out.
"Just you, hon,â his voice is low and dangerous and you think you might really hate him this time.
âYou know itâs nearly midnight, donât you? Are you ever gonna call me when youâre sober?â
You hear a noncommittal grunt on the other end.
âWhat do you want, Logan?â
He takes a deep breath.
âCan I come over? Iâve just been missing you. Been a rough day.â
âNo.â
âPlease, baby? I need you. Please?â
You close your eyes and exhale. Ten calls ago, you might have tried to hide the frustration, but youâre well beyond that now.
Itâs always a bad idea. Always makes you remember the bits of him you miss desperately. Your nights together. How you still fucking love him.
âCan take care of you, princess-â he pleads.
âI hate when you call me that. And no, you canât. You canât even take care of yourself, Howlett.â
He huffs a laugh. âBeen doinâ alright a couple hundred years. Keepinâ myself alive.â
You donât want to say the question neither of you will acknowledge.
Is this really living?
âFine. You can come over.â
âIâll be there in five.â
âMotherfucker-! Have you been on your way this whole time, Lo?â
With a snort, he ends the call.
Heâs on you before you can even get the door closed behind you. His hands are cradling your head as he kisses you deeply. You were right; he tastes like cheap whiskey. And cigarettes, you realize. Fucking cigarettes. And then you rememberâ heâs all but abandoned his cigars, as though the pain of losing a vice was part of his penance.Â
With an awkward foot you try to hook the bridge of your foot along the edge of the door, pull at it, but instead of closing it you just overbalance, tumbling further into him.
He catches you as if it was nothing, as if he were so innately steady heâd always be there to break your fall.
When he has you back on your feet, he gets right back to it, tearing at your clothing and his, pulling your top over your head, fumbling with the drawstring of your bottoms. He cups your breasts, pinching and teasing, and walks you backwards till the backs of your knees hit the foot of your bed and you tumble.Â
Logan tumbles with you, his hold on you never ceasing, and now you can feel how hard he is against you.
It sends a shiver down your spine.
Youâve missed this. Fuck youâve missed this. What kind of self-destructive dumbass judgment were you letting rule you?Â
You need to gain some control back.
âCondom,â you tell him.Â
He rolls his eyes.
âIâm not joking, Logan. Should still be in the top drawer.â
He exhales with a chuckle, but pulls his beater over his head and lets you get an eyeful of his toned chest before leaning over and sliding the drawer open.
Then, he rummages around, pulling back with a shit-eating grin.Â
In his hand is a roll of condoms, classic fit.
âYou got a little boyfriend?â he asks, and you feel your face heat.
âShut the fuck up, Logan.â
âNow Iâm not seeing the Magnumâs in here. You sure you still have them? Or are you so busy fucking dumbass boys with little pricks that you canât even bother to pick up the phone?â
âThe condoms are just in caseâ better to be preparedâ and besides itâs none of your fucking business if Iâm sleeping with anyone else!â
âYou know I canât get STIs, right?â
You do know. You remember that first conversation years ago. You grit your teeth.
âAnd if youâre so worried,â he continues, âIâll buy you Plan B.â
âMove,â you tell him, and he scoots back so you can look in the drawer yourself. Much to your chagrin, heâs right. Not a single gold packet in sight.
You groan, and he laughs.
You should tell him no. Should tell him that if he wants to fuck you, he needs to go out and get some. Because itâs not even the risk of any sort of transmission, or even the risk of pregnancy that gives you pause. Itâs the intimacy. The way you can hardly bear it when you can feel him dripping out of you. The love you still have for him, even after everything.Â
The way you know he still needs you, too. More than you need him. But after everything heâs done, everything heâs been through, everything heâs lostâ you canât bear to be another thing he loses, not fully.
But now heâs straddling you, scooting you backwards towards the head of the bed. His cock presses heavy against your thigh, and youâre so overwhelmed by the way heâs pressing kisses along your jaw and nibbling behind your ear, you barely notice as he lifts your hips to pull your panties down. His nails scrape down your back and the angry scratches start to bloom with heat.Â
You donât realize youâre both fully naked until you feel the heat from him press against you, the slick of his weeping cockhead dragging a trail just below your navel, down down down-
He strokes himself twice and lines himself up, pressing against your opening. You wait for the feeling, for the way he always slams inside you, but he surprises you. Presses the tip in and rocks himself gently, easing you open.
After a moment (and hardly a single inch) he pulls out and sits up.
For a gut-wrenching second, you think heâs changed his mind, and how fucking dare him? Heâs not the one who gets to back out of this. Fuck.
But then his cock is replaced with his hand, and he pumps himself with his left, while pressing inside of you with his right, scissoring his fingers open, pulling whine and moan and gasp out of you, coaxing you along with his filthy mouth the whole way.
âJesus Christ,â he sighs, letting out a groan when you squirm against him, âYouâre tight as the first time I fucked you. Clearly no oneâs been takinâ care of this pussy, huh?â
Two fingers become three, and youâre overwhelmed with sensation, pleasure taking over any rational thought.
âThatâs it, honey, open up for me. Such a shame no oneâs been fuckinâ you right. Would make you feel good every damn day if youâd let me.â
He rubs against your clit in unyielding circles and pulls you right to the edge. You feel yourself dripping, thighs trembling, and tears rolling down your face, but just as youâre about to cum he stops. He guides your arms upwards and pins you down by the wrists with one rough hand and leans over, caging you against the bed. In a second beat, he knocks your legs wide, baring you fully, and he presses himself in. Youâre beyond slick and the glide is exquisite. The feeling of his bare cock pressing into you makes you shudder with arousal. The wiry hairs at the base of his cock grind against you, making you shake.Â
He fucks you deep and slow. The drag is exquisite. He pulls almost the whole way out, before rocking back in again, his foreskin adding to the delicious glide. With every thrust heâs burying himself so deeply youâd swear you could feel him in your belly.
âYouâre openinâ up so nice, takinâ it so good,â he growls, and you feel a thrill of pleasure bloom through your body at the praise. âBeen missinâ this. Miss how soft you feel around me. Have you been missinâ your old man, too?â
You donât even register heâs asked a question till his palm is swatting your jaw. Itâs not painful, it doesnât even sting. And it does exactly what heâd hoped; it refocuses you on him.
âWha- What?â you ask, coming back to him, whilst feeling your peak build and build and build-
âHave you been missinâ your old man, princess?Â
âFuck you, Logan.â
âUse your words.â
âYes-â
âYes, what?â
âYes Iâve been missing you. Stop looking at me like that, Lo. Câmon now, fuck me like you mean it.â
You canât deal with him being sincere right now. You need it rough and you need it mean.
It takes him a moment to pull himself away but then he does, obliging as if he can read your thoughts. He pulls out, leans back, hooks your legs over his shoulders, and makes you moan as he folds you in half. Heâs pressing so much deeper now than he had only a moment ago. Any gentleness that had been there disappears immediately.
Heâs panting, letting out heavy grunts as he slams into you and sweat drips down his temple.Â
As he fucks you, he drives into you cruelly but you match each thrust. Every time he knocks you back, you press against him harder and heavier. Make sure it hurts, for both of you.
Heâs never been a selfish lover and makes you scream on his cock, cumming three times in rapid succession, each peak that little bit higher. Each peak is a little bit harder.Â
Youâre boneless and spent. When he cums inside you, his claws shoot out, angrily splintering existing notches on your headboard. Blood trickles down between his knuckles. One drop lands on your lips, the perfect kiss from this mess of a man. Another drop lands on your new linen pillowcase.
At least you got those tide pens.Â
You want to tell him off about the headboardâthe splintered edges are ugly and ragged. But the fact you hadnât gotten a new headboard is kind of on you. It may as well be an invitation.
You add a note to your shopping list. Plan B.
â-
You wake up alone in a dark room. The first thing you see is your bedside alarm clock, red blinking numbers telling you itâs 3:12 AM. Then, you hear a rustling in your living room.
You step out to investigate, bleary-eyed, to find Logan silhouetted in front of your liquor cabinet, bottle of amber liquid in hand. He raises the bottle and takes a swig.
Back to this-
"Go home, Logan.â You tell him, and he startles at your voice.
"Baby- I been havinâ bad dreams-âÂ
You cut him off. "Iâll call you a cab. Youâre not staying here, trying to drink yourself to death on my sofa-â
"Sweetheart,â he cuts in, âYou know it never sticks-âÂ
He says it with a grin like it means nothing, and itâs mean. Makes your stomach flip.
This is the closest either of you had ever gotten to the depths of it all. Youâd both been pretending for so long.
You leave the room.
A minute later, youâre back, and Logan has emptied the bottle.
"Get dressed.â You toss his shirt at him. It smacks him in the face and falls unceremoniously to the floor. âCabâs on its way. You owe me for the whiskey.â
He nods. His movement is loose, and you can see the booze is finally affecting him. More than just making him gutsy, itâs making him sloppy. Every movement is sluggish as he redresses.
"You wanna know why?â He asks, and it comes out slurred.
You ignore him. âIâll walk you down. Get home safe, okay?â
He nods again. Looks like heâs trying to put on a show to prove just how sincere he is.
You kick his shoes towards him, and help him with his jacket when he struggles.
A horn honks outside, and you both look to the window. When you turn your head back, though, heâs only inches away from you, whiskey-breath across your cheek, and a wearier frown than heâs ever let you see before.
"When I drink I donât dream-,â he tells you, âClaws donât come out.â
Then he kisses you on the cheek, turns on his heel with an unsteady sway, and leaves your home.
You struggle for hours to fall back asleep, the bed suddenly much too big.
You ignore his calls for a week. They come through later and later. Nine PM, ten. Midnight. Two.
And then one night you get a text.Â
Heâs rarely one for texting, so to see the notification makes your heart speed up and your stomach flip.
DO NOT PICK UP - Attachment: 1 Video
With a single, hesitant tap, you open it.
Youâre not sure what you expected. Something dramatic, maybe? Something miserable? You hope to god heâs not figured out some way to make himself an adamantium bullet. Itâs a fear thatâs bounced around in your head for a while now, but youâd never ask just in case he hasnât thought of it yet himself.
Whatever it is, though, it has to be something that will make your heart ache and your head spin andâ
Itâs anticlimactic. Kind of.
Itâs just a video of him, phone angled to show him in his steamed-up mirror.
There are dark shadows beneath his red-rimmed eyes, but besides that, he looks as perfect as ever. You canât see below his hips, but you know Logan and you know heâs fully naked. His body hair is slick, his skin glowing from being freshly showered.
This fucking asshole knows exactly how to get you.
You hit play.Â
At first, you can barely tell itâs a video. And then you see the way his arm is moving. Heâs holding his phone with one hand, his other casually stroking himself just below the frame of the video.
âYou gonna stop ignoring me?â he asks, his voice a throaty purr. âQuit playing games. Get your ass over here and let me take care of you.â
AND, you realize with a twinge, you text with him so rarely, you never turned off read receipts.
Three dots appear and you know that he knows youâve seen it.Â
A moment later, the text comes through.
âReady for you, princess.â
God, if only it would take more than that.
As if overtaken by a horny ghost, youâre already slipping your panties off and putting on your favorite skirt.Â
Youâre at his house an hour later.Â
You let him guide you. Taste you. Fuck you. Fight with you.Â
You let him devour you, and let yourself fall in with him, in with the guilt and the anger and the hate and self-pity.
And fuck, itâs the love, too. It never went away.
#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#logan howlett x you#wolverine smut#james logan howlett x reader#xmen x reader#logan howlett x f!reader#logan x reader#logan x f!reader#logan x fem!reader#logan howlett smut#worst logan#worst wolverine
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touch starved (one-shot)
summary: logan agreed to go out with wade, having been promised a low-key night, but he should've known than to trust wade for his word. he didn't agree to spend his night at a strip club and he's just about ready to leave until he sees you. pairing: worst!wolverine x fem!reader content warnings: explicit smut (18+, mdni), porn without plot, lap dance, grinding / humping, striptease, one night stand (you take logan back to your apartment), unprotected p in v (be safe folks!), cowgirl, reader takes charge (and logan's more than happy to let you take the lead), oral - m receiving, swallowing logan's release. basically this story is all about catering to logan and his needs đââïž, reader description (only clothes and hair), no use of y/n. word count: 3k a/n: coming at ya with yet another one-shot of logan filth lol. my own headcanon is that logan / worst!wolverine is touch starved (just as much as he craves to be part of something bigger than himself). anyway, hope y'all enjoy - it's a spicy one đ€ song: closer by nine inch nails
âYou promised a quiet night out, Wade,â Logan snarls at the other man, hand gripping his glass of whiskey. Itâs too loud in here, the music blaring from the speakers, the flashing dark red lights illuminating mainly the stage where women are performing. There are plenty of men surrounding the stage, alcohol in one hand and dollar bills in the other.
âI promised no such thing,â Wade grins. âI said letâs go out and you agreed.â
Loganâs jaw tightens and he looks at Wade with narrowed eyes. âYouâre a fuckinâ liar.âÂ
Wade laughs. âCome on, peanut! Have some fun. Let loose. Just sit back and relaxââ
âIâm leavinâ,â Logan interrupts, downing his entire glass before slamming it on the table. He stands up and gets ready to turn on his heel when he catches a glimpse of you at the corner of his eye. He turns slightly and watches the way your smile meets your eyes. You donât look like you belong in a place like this, the other women wearing too much make up and revealing so much that it leaves little to the imagination. But you⊠You look absolutely breathtaking and Logan feels like he canât move, canât tear his eyes away from you.
Your hair cascades past your shoulders, your make up remaining light and natural. Youâre dressed in an all black sheer robe with a lace cuff and satin waist belt. The robe is loosely wrapped around your frame, giving Logan a glimpse of your sheer mesh bra, the top of your bra trimmed with lace and when you undo the belt of your robe to reveal your lower half, he feels his breath catch in his throat. Your panties â or rather, your thong â matches the same style of your bra.Â
Itâs so innocent in comparison to the other women in the strip club, and yet, Logan canât seem to take his eyes off of you. Itâs only when he hears Wadeâs voice that he finally looks away, even though heâs yearning to just look at you again.
âOh, someoneâs caught your eye,â Wade grins, swaying in his seat. âWant a private dance, Mr. Wolverine?â
âShut the fuck up,â Logan says. âLike I said, I was leavinâââ
âSo soon?â you interrupt and glance between both men. You flash a smile in Wadeâs direction who looks like heâs about ready to combust with excitement. Heâs sipping his drink with a straw, grinning in your direction. Then, you glance over at Logan whose eyes stare directly into your own.Â
âActually,â Wade says. âHow much for a private danceâŠâ he trails, staring up at you as he waits for you to say your name.
âKitty,â you finish for him. âYou can call me Kitty.â
âVery fitting,â Wade winks. âWell, Kitty, itâs my friendâs first night out in a very long time and I figured I can treat him to a private dance.â
âThatâs very nice of you,â you respond, but your eyes never leave Loganâs. You can see his eyes flit over your frame, lingering on your exposed skin.
âListen, you ainât have to andââ
âHow about the first oneâs on me?â you interject.Â
âSweetheart,â Logan mumbles.Â
You bite your lower lip and gently reach up to rest a hand on his arm. You can feel the muscle beneath the fabric of his shirt, can feel him flex it underneath your fingertips. Logan inhales sharply as he looks down at your hand, clearing his throat at your soft touch.Â
âHis nameâs Logan, by the way,â Wade chimes in, cutting through the tension with a quiet giggle.Â
âBut only if you want to, Logan,â you whisper, moving your hand down his arm and to his forearm. You bat your eyelashes up at him, trying to ignore the obvious attraction you feel towards him. Truthfully, youâd rather spend the rest of your night with him rather than give dances to other men in the club â men who didnât look like Logan.Â
Logan feels his resolve diminishing, but when he hears his name leave your lips, he nods slowly. âYâ Yeah, sure.âÂ
âGreat, come with me.â You smile and gently take his hand in yours. He looks down at it, taking notice of the way his large hand encompasses yours and he allows you to lead him towards the back of the club and into a much more private room.Â
Once inside, Logan hears the door shut and he turns to face you, his eyes lingering on your frame. He watches you walk towards him, hips swaying to the muffled sound of the music until he feels your hands rest firmly on his chest.Â
âYouâre a shy one,â you point out, tongue darting out to lick your lower lip.Â
âNot shy,â Logan mumbles. âJust beinâ respectful, sweetheart.âÂ
âSexy and a gentleman?â you smile. âMind if I keep you for the rest of the night?â you tease.
Logan feels a blush rise in his cheeks and lets out a quiet grunt when he feels you push him back against the large sofa. He stares up at you, eyes obviously now trailing your frame. He keeps his hands on his lap, though he yearns to reach out to touch you.Â
âLogan,â you whisper, moving your hands to rest on the backs of the couch as you lean in until your lips are mere inches from one another. Youâre slightly bent over to be at eye level with him and you smile, catching the way he clears his throat. âIf you donât want to do this, all you have to do is say so, okay?âÂ
âOkay,â he responds quietly.Â
You smile and gently press a soft kiss on his cheek, slowly pulling away to see that his eyes had fallen shut. You turn on your heel and walk over to the speaker to put on a couple of songs that you normally play when you give a private dance. Pressing play on the first song, you then turn around to face him once more. He looks so large in this room â his legs spread open on the sofa, broad shoulders and chiseled muscle beneath the fabric of the flannel heâs wearing. This was only ever a job to you, never finding anyone all that interesting or attractive, but Logan â well, youâd risk your entire job if it meant you can have him for one night.Â
As the first song plays and filters the room, your eyes meet Loganâs who is staring at you with an anticipated look on his face. His eyes move along your legs, up to your midsection and then up to your breasts and back down. Slowly, you remove your robe and let it pool around your ankles as you strut towards him. Your hips sway with each forward step and Logan lets out a shaky breath.Â
Once youâre standing in front of him, between his legs, you lean down and gently brush your lips against the corner of his lips. His facial hair tickles your lips and you pull back enough to stare into his eyes, lips slowly grazing his own. âYou can touch me,â you whisper and move your hands onto his strong shoulders, slowly straddling his hips. âTo be honest, Iâd let you do anything youâd want to me,â you say quietly into his ear.Â
Loganâs large hands immediately move to your hips, gripping it tightly as you sit firmly on his lap. Heâs so hard and he feels so embarrassed, but the look on your face when you feel him alleviates some of the uncertainty heâs feeling.Â
This isnât the first time youâve felt a manâs erection while giving them a lap dance, but it is the first time that you actually let out a quiet moan as you slowly roll your hips against his own, to the beat of the song. The tension between you thickens in the air and you stare deeply into his eyes as you try to remember the routine that you normally do for this song.Â
You let me violate youÂ
You let me desecrate youÂ
You let me penetrate youÂ
You let me complicate you
Loganâs hands slowly move from your hips to your thighs, his fingertips digging into the meat of your flesh as your hips roll against his. He clears his throat and watches as your eyes flutter with each movement. He has to wonder if this is all part of your act, that maybe youâre just acting like youâre enjoying this.Â
âLogan,â you whisper, moving to slightly lean back in his lap. You move one hand from his shoulder to reach behind you and rest on his knee as you lift your hips before coming back down on his lap. Logan groans quietly, almost inaudibly, as he moves a hand to splay on your abdomen, slowly moving it upwards towards your breasts.Â
I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God
When his thumb brushes against your nipple, feeling it peak beneath the sheer fabric of your bra, he has to wonder if maybe he crossed a line. Logan moves his hand away from you but you grab his wrist and move it back over your breasts. He smirks and wraps his free arm around your waist, pulling you flush against him as he leans forward.Â
You let out a quiet moan and feel a wetness settle between your legs that you have to lift your hips off of him, not wanting to stain his dark jeans with your arousal. Slowly, you stand back up and hear him let out a quiet, disapproving groan. You stand between his legs, moving one hand in your hair as you use the other to run along your body, grazing your own breasts and down between the valley of your thighs as your hips sway to each beat of the song.
You tear down my reason
(Help me) it's your sex I can smell
(Help me) you make me perfect
Help me become somebody else
Logan can smell your arousal, can smell just how excited you are and the uncertainty he felt earlier is now completely gone. His hands move up your legs, fingertips hooking into the thin waistband of your thong, but he feels your hands move to rest over his.Â
âLogan,â you say quietly. Even through the music, he can hear your voice, can hear the desire and yearning in your tone.Â
âYeah, sweetheart?âÂ
âI want to take you home,â you admit, moving to sit back on his lap. âI know itâs very unprofessional, butââ
Logan grins. âThen take me home.âÂ
â
Logan had told Wade what happened, the other man all too excited for him. He hadnât expected this night to turn the way it did and thereâs some part of him that doesnât feel like he deserves it, but when he sees you step out of the club with that same sweet smile that meets your eyes, he pushes those feelings out of his mind. Because all he can think about is whatâs going to happen next.Â
The drive to your apartment was short and the moment you step out of the car, Loganâs quick to follow you. He steps inside of the apartment with you and you shut the door behind him before youâre on him almost instantly. Your arms wrap around his shoulders and Loganâs hands move to rest on your hips. You stare up at him before you lean up to press your lips firmly against his.Â
Logan groans instantly against your lips, eyes falling shut as he follows your lead. You move one hand down his chest to his abdomen until it reaches the waistband of his jeans. He feels your tongue slide past his lips and he whimpers against you â he fucking whimpers. Loganâs used to being the one in charge that it takes him by surprise when youâre more than willing to take control.Â
When you undo the button and zipper of his jeans, you pull away. Your gaze darkens at the sight of him and you bring him further into your apartment, once more pushing him against your couch as he sits down with a grunt. Standing in front of him, you pull down your shorts and panties in one motion, grabbing the ends of your shirt to lift over your head. You stand in front of him, completely bare and exposed for him that Logan doesnât know where to look first.Â
Youâre so fucking breathtaking that he feels his manhood strain against the fabric of his jeans. Logan slowly pushes his jeans and boxers down his legs, catching the way your eyes widen at the sight of his erected length. He smirks to himself and undoes the buttons of his flannel, pushing it off his shoulders.Â
âFuck me,â you whisper under your breath. âYouâre so fucking hot, Logan.âÂ
Logan bites his lower lip. He doesnât have time to respond, to tell you that youâre the one whoâs so fucking hot because you straddle his hips and take hold of length. He groans at the feel of your hand wrapped around him, lining him up to your opening. He doesnât know how long heâs going to last â it had been such a long time since anyoneâs wanted him like this, since anyone looked at him the way you did.Â
In his universe, everyone hated him.Â
But in this one â Logan has a second chance at living life the way he should have in the first place.Â
When you slide down his length, Loganâs hands move to your hips. He groans loudly, your walls surrounding his length â so warm, so wet, so tight. Your walls slide down every inch of his length until youâre seated fully on his lap. He looks up at you, sees the way your eyes flutter.Â
âGod, youâre so deep,â you point out with a quiet moan, moving your hands to his shoulders. Holding onto him, you slowly begin to lift yourself before you slide back down. You can feel every inch of his throbbing manhood within your depths and he fills you so fully in a way that youâve never felt before.Â
He shifts to lie on his back on your couch, staring up at you. Your hands move to rest on his chest, rolling your hips forward and backward. You can feel the hair at his base brush against your bundle of nerves with each movement, quiet moans escaping your lips.Â
Logan moans in surprise when you reach for his hands, lacing your fingers together as you press them above his head. He knows that heâs so much stronger than you, but he finds that he likes being at your mercy. Youâre gripping his hands so tightly, pressing your joined hands further into your couch as you begin to bounce along his length. You lift yourself until his tip is the only part of him thatâs within your depths before you slide back down, your tight walls sliding down each inch of him.
âSweetheart, fuck,â Logan groans, squirming slightly against your grip. He feels your walls begin to tremble around him, can feel you tightening even further around his manhood.Â
âLoâ Logan!â you exclaim, moaning loudly as you slam down onto him. You shut your eyes tightly, slowly moving your hips forward and backward to ride out your high. You release his hands to brace yourself on his chest, the feeling of his hair at his base providing just the right amount of friction.Â
Logan feels a tightness building in the pit of his stomach and he gently lifts you off of him. You gasp, whimpering at the sudden loss of him before you realize that heâs close. You move down the couch and settle yourself between his legs as you take hold of his length, stroking him with a firm grip as your lips wrap around his tip.Â
âFuck!â he groans, not expecting you to fucking suck him off. Logan moves a hand in your hair, tangling his fingers in your locks as he guides you along his length. Your hand strokes what your mouth canât and when you hollow your cheeks to apply more pressure around him, Logan tosses his head back against the couch.Â
Itâs sloppy, spit trickling down your chin as you keep your eyes focused on him. You move along his length, flattening your tongue on the underside of him as you feel each throbbing vein against you. Loganâs grip around your hair tightens and he lifts his hips slightly off the couch to push himself further into your mouth, feeling his tip hit the back of your throat as you gag around him.
Slowly, you pull away from him and smile. âCome for me, Logan.â Then, you wrap your mouth around him once more and bob your head rapidly, stroking his base. Logan shuts his eyes tightly, the tightness building once more as he lets out a loud moan. He gently pushes your hand away as he grips himself, using his free hand to pull you back from your hair as he releases into your mouth. He opens his eyes to look down at you, his seed filling your mouth and you eagerly swallow.Â
Logan groans, stroking himself to release every last drop of his spend into your mouth. You smile against him â you fucking smile with his cock in your mouth â and itâs an image that Logan will never forget. When you pull away and lick your lips, swallowing every last drop, you lean up on your knees and stare at him.
âYum,â you grin.Â
Loganâs breathing heavily, moving one hand to rest behind his head as he looks at you with a small smile. âDidnât expect this to happen tonight,â he admits. âBut Iâm glad it did.âÂ
âStay the night?â you ask.Â
Logan nods and sits up, gently pushing you onto your back as he settles himself between your legs. âOh, sweetheart, I ainât even done with you yet.â
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Drunk texting
DP&W!Logan x Fem!reader: featuring Wade
Summary: logan goes out with Wade and won't stop calling and texting your phone
CW: fluff | mention of alcohol | dirty talk | failed attempt at sexting | mature language | mention of sex | drunk logan |
Word count: Over 1k
Authors note: Hi, please be kind. I'm still trying to get back into writing. I didn't proofread this. My requests are open. Divider by @saradika-graphics
My work will always be 18+ Minors do not interact or read.
It was 2:00 am on a fucking Wednesday night and your phone was blowing up. Wade had dragged Logan out to have some "bonding time with peanut." Which was code for which of them could get drunk the fastest. It always led to the bar being completely drained of alcohol â usually with one of them coming home with a bruised eye (Wade).
Logan could drink, and so could wade. But he has such a high tolerance that the amount of alcohol he consumed in order to get completely drunk would probably kill the average man. Not good. That meant longer days spent working so he could pay off the tab. You didn't mind most of the time. Since he needed a break and have some fun every once in a while.
Your phone lights up next to your bed. You tried to ignore it, but it kept happening over and over. The loud buzz vibrating on the night stand. You groan and throw your pillow over your head. No use. The sound just kept getting louder and louder.
You sit up in bed and grab it, the bright light making your eyes water a bit. You look down, and your eyebrows shoot up. There were about 46 text messages, and over 10 missed calls. All from logan and a few from wade.
You open your text message app to read what the hell was so important that he had to blow your phone up in the middle of the night.
Lo đ: miss you.
Lo đ: Wades tupee is crooked, not telling him tho
Lo đ: luv u ba.yb
Lo đ: gonna fkc u wen I get home
Lo đ: gonna have u soking my dick
Lo đ: stop ignore me
Lo đ: [image]
Your eyes were still trying to adjust to the screen of your phone as you read through every text message logan has sent. You sighed, looking at the picture he sent you. You could tell he was absolutely trashed. He was in the run-down bars bathroom. The lighting in there was dim, and the mirror was dirty. He was holding his semi hard cock in one hand and had the bottom of shirt in between his teeth. The sight alone had you squeezing your thighs together. His abs were flexed and a little sweaty, making his happy trail stick to his skin. You had to take a deep breath and calm yourself.
You clicked back and went over to the texts Wade had sent you. You were trying to get your mind off of the selfie logan sent.
Wade: don't worry pookie is fine.
Wade: he's got his tits out like a slut.
Wade: okay now he's fighting
Wade: Okay now he's fighting ME
Wade: I'm not even drunk. I've been having the bartender give me water the whole night đ
Wade: is he in heat ??? All he's been talking about is fucking
You rolled your eyes and let out a breathy laugh. You knew the second wade got logan through that front door it was over. Just as you had that thought, the door went bursting open, hitting the wall behind it with a loud bang.
"Speak of the devil." You mumbled under your breath. You walked out and saw Wade throwing logan back onto the couch.
He turned to you. "Sunshine here decided to start hmmm his fourth bar fight of the night, so we got kicked out."
You ran your hand down your face and looked down at where logan was slumped over. "Bad night?"
"Nah, luckily, he got whiskey dick of the claws, so no one was shanked." Wade shrugged as he readjusted his toupee. You fought the urge to laugh when you remembered logans text from earlier.
You let out a sigh of relief that no one was actually hurt tonight. You don't know what you'd do if you had to bail logan out of jail. Knowing Wade, he'd probably would just break him out.
"Well thank you for taking him out tonight. He's been......kinda down lately." You spoke as your eyes were still trained on your boyfriend.
There was pause before he spoke up again. He knew how much his friend could get into his own head and overthink.
"No problem. I'm gonna leave you two alone before he wakes up and tells me how much he wants to eat your ass again." Wade gave you a sympathetic pat to your shoulder and quickly hauled ass out of your apartment.
He wasn't gonna stick around incase logan decided to whip out his cock. You couldn't blame him.
Your face got hot, and you groaned again. Logan always had such a way with words. The thought of him telling Wade anything about your sex life was enough to make you want to go hide under your blanket. Now you were wondering what the hell those two talk about when you or Vanessa were not around.
A low grumble sounded from logan as he woke up. His eyes were dropping, and his speech was slurred. He looked around, confused as to where he was until he saw you. He gave you a weak smile and patted his lap for you to sit.
"C'mere" logan hiccups. "Been missin' ya all night." He tried reaching for you.
You immediately slapped his hand away.
"Nuh, uh, I'm gonna make you some water, and you're gonna sleep on this couch until you're sobered up." You shook your head and backed away.
"Then maybe just maaaybe you can have me in the morning. Deal?"
Logan pouted and sunk deeper into his spot. You couldn't help but chuckle a bit. You couldn't deny the sad pout on his face was cute. He looked so annoyed with you, but he didn't have it in his heart to be mean. Never to you. No matter how drunk logan got, it still didn't keep him from having that soft spot for you.
"Why don't you stand between my legs and lemme eat your pussy then." He slurred again.
"Jesus christ." You muttered and went into the kitchen to pour him some water.
You'd think you would be used to his dirty talk by now. Yet he still managed to surprise you with it. If he wasn't drunk off his ass right now, you would have peeled off all your clothes and let him have you right there on that couchâ letting him stuff his cock so deep in your pussy it made your legs tremble before he even started moving. You shake your head of those thoughts and continue getting him his water.
By the time you came back, he had already passed out. You sat the water down and helped him into a more comfortable position. Throwing a blanket over him, you placed a gentle kiss to the tip of his nose. Quickly, you went back into your bed to get some sleep. You're sure by morning he would be back to normal. He didn't get hangovers much. Maybe you'd take him up on all of his all of those offers once he's sober.
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