#worse with her guilt about him getting captured. She knows he was captured a second time and tortured but she doesn't know about the

[morrigan-sims]

Reunion

"Rook, is that really you?" "It's me."

This render has been sitting basically finished, just un-rendered and un-edited in my folders for WEEKS now, which is a crime, because it's fucking adorable.

Rook finally got to see his former captain and mentor, Zara, again for the first time in 3 years, and it was a very bittersweet reunion. She ended up revealing that she was aware of every single things that Wolf was doing to him during his time on the Sea Snake, but was unable to do anything about it because if she or anyone under her employ were to attempt to rescue him, Wolf would have killed him. As it turns out, she gave up sailing in order to protect him, lest Wolf take any movement of hers as a threat.

Here's my write-up of the first part of the scene:

And of course the reunion was then interrupted by the arrival of a giant snake which proceeded to eat Jay, the former surgeon's apprentice on Zara's ship and Rook's only friend prior to meeting the party. When he showed up Zara had been about to explain something very important to Rook (why Wolf hates her so much, and why she went after Rook), and after weeks of delays and fighting the giant snake, Rook (and I) finally get to find out the truth on Saturday.

Zara's been hinting that it's something Not Good and that she's worried about his reaction, but luckily for her, Rook would forgive her literally anything. And I do mean anything. She was the first person in his life who was ever truly kind to him, and she means more to him than any other person in his life. And this is the same man who tried to tell the BBEG of the entire campaign that he "wasn't that person anymore", after only knowing him for a matter of months. (In his defense he didn't know he was the BBEG.) In comparison, he'd been sailing with Zara for 6 years before he was captured.

Oh, and she's also going to give him her old ship, the Tide Breaker, and name him captain, which is going to be a bit of a mindfuck for him, given his intense guilt over Jay and like 18 other bad things that have happened to the party recently. Augh, I can't wait.

[cybershock24601]

Haven't read the wingmaker job yet but keep seeing snippets from it and the best justification I have for why Illario is so different is because he's McFreakin' Losing It during the game. His house of cards is collapsing and to say he is not handling it well would be an understatement.

First, he has the cousin he's been mourning for a year and probably dealing with a very complicated mix of grief, guilt, and regret because he ordered Lucanis' death and still hasn't gotten what he wanted out of it- being made First Talon - and only lost his brother. Only to find out actually his cousin is alive, his grandmother has known the whole time and didn't say anything to him, and now his cousin is going to be coming back and Illario knows he's never going to be First Talon unless he does something. Then Lucanis is back and he's an abomination, a fate a lot of people in Thedas would say is worse than death and I'm sure Illario knows that Caterina would still pick Lucanis anyways even after she finds out what her poor boy has become.

Second, he needs to get rid of Caterina because it's clear she's not going to let him be First Talon ever. But he can't kill her. That's his grandmother who he has an incredibly complex relationship with and still craves her approval even though he knows he isn't going to get it, and after everything with Lucanis, I don't think Illario could go through with killing someone else close him considering how messed up he was after getting rid of Lucanis. Which also presents problems because is he just going to keep Caterina locked up for the rest of her days? What was the end goal in kidnapping her? I don't think Illario really thought it all through because he was panicking and had to think fast when he found out Lucanis was alive and coming back.

Third, Illario also has to deal with Zara. No matter what Illario's actual feelings towards her are, Illario still has to keep her thinking he's still interested and into her even after she betrayed him by capturing and torturing Lucanis for a year. Illario probably started making his deal with the Venetori long before you find out about it in the game seeing as he's already cozied up to Zara, so he's also having to play an entire organization for their support which probably gets a lot more complicated after he kills his main point of contact even if he likely frames it as Rook and Lucanis offing her.

Lastly, Illarrio has to think of the Crows and present himself as a properly grieving grandson and relieved that his cousin is back and manage House Dellamorte with his grandmother gone and Lucanis on contract. He's gotta gather support amongst the other Talons and allay suspicion and with so many different plates to balance and sheer emotional turmoil the guy is going through, it makes sense that he's dropping the ball on a lot of things during the game. Illario is stuck in a nightmare scenario and its one he set in motion himself with no way out and only the title of First Talon as consolation that everything he has done was worth it.

[beifong-brainrot]

I've honestly always loved the scene between Zuko and Katara in the Crystal Caves during the Crossroads of Destiny, even though it's been kinda diluted by shipping discourse.

I love how this scene showcases how far Zuko's story has come, but that it still has a ways to go. It's also a great moment from Katara, showing off her compassion and kindness, despite her rightful anger at Zuko. And this moment of "reaching across the aisle" between two children who were forced into something much bigger and crueler than they could ever be apways makes me quite emotional.

But I'm kinda tired of seeing this scene in just that vacuum, when looking at it in relation to two other scenes makes it so much more interesting.

The first scene we can compare this interaction to is pretty obvious, since it's basically "the other half" of Katara and Zuko's moment. It's Iroh and Aang's conversation in the tunnel.

I adore this scene it's just such a vibe I too would like to walk through a tunnel with a nice old man who gives me good advice (even if said nice old man is a war criminal)

Of course the first obvious parallel between these two converastions is a member of the Gaang (two members who have been most affected by the fire nations actions btw) having a genuine, deep conversation with a banished member of the Fire Nation royal family.

I also think this conversation contrasts Katara and Zuko's conversation very well. It juxtaposes Iroh and Zuko, showing us how far Iroh has come and how far Zuko still has to go.

I think it's very symbolic that Katara and Zuko connect mainly on their pasts, while Iroh and Aang do about the present and future.

Two quotes in this conversation stand out to me particularly.

Iroh: Perfection and power are overrated. I think you were very wise to choose happiness and love.

It not only relates to Aang's current predicament, but it also foreshadows Zuko's dissatisfaction with his life after he returns to the Fire Nation at Azula's side. After Zuko helps "kill" Aang and take over Ba Sing Se, he has acheived what he believed would be his version of perfection, while also getting back the power he was born into. But he is miserable. He's dissatisfied, wracked with guilt and constantly second guessing himself and the world around him. He even says this: During the meeting, I was a perfect prince... the son my father wanted. But I wasn't me.

But Zuko was also unable to fully choose a simple life of peace and happiness in Ba Sing Se, choosing to fight Azula when she attacks him and Iroh. Because he still subconciously was searching for that feeling of power and wasn't ready to allow himself to prioritise things other than his honour. He wanted to fight Azula and prove himself, but he just eneded up allowing himself to be captured by the overwhelming force of the Dai Li.

While Iroh has learnt to see the merit in a simple life and actively rejects the power (for better or for worse) that comes with his status as a member of the royal family.

Iroh: I don't know the answer. Sometimes, life is like this dark tunnel. You can't always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you just keep moving, [Aang earthbends the rocks away one last time. Iroh's fire blows out. He smiles.] you will come to a better place.

Of course, this quote could relate to many things, including just the whole story of the show, but it also obviously relates to Zuko's redemption arc. Zuko's story is the epitome of continuing to slowlu crawl through a dark tunnel until you reach a better place. He stagnates and stumbles occasionally, but he keeps goingm and eventually gets there.

He reaches his better place.

It's interesting to see the contrast between Zuko and Katara's interaction and that of Iroh and Aang.

I think the scene in which Aang and Katara split off from Zuko and Iroh.

Aang and Iroh maintain eye contact, and Aang even gives a respectful bow. While Katara tries to make eye contact with Zuko, but he turns his gaze away, as if ashamed of his moment of weakness. Eye contact is very important is ATLA's visual storytelling, as I've spoken before in my post analysing the mutuality of Kataang's gaze.

I believe this scene foreshadows Zuko siding with Azula and Iroh siding with the Gaang at the end of the episode. Iroh and Aang have reached an understanding, and therefore, they are represented as facing each other and parting on good, respectful terms.

While in Katara and Zuko's case, Katara tries to make a similar connection with Zuko, however he rejects that connection. Ultimately this forces Katara to turn her back on him too, which may foreshadow her rightful anger at him in B3.

Ok, so the first interaction I want to metion gives us a bit of insight to Zuko, but what about Katara?

For that we have to go all the way back to B1, to an episode that I don't really see talked about in relation to Katara's story. Jeong Jeong is only the second friendly firebender Katara has encountered in probably her entire life, the first being Shayu, with whom she had very little interaction. Of course, I think this would at least give her pause.

Jeong Jeong and Katara's conversation is very short, but I think it had a great impact on Katara.

Jeong Jeong : You have healing abilities. The great benders of the Water Tribe sometimes have this ability. I've always wished I were blessed like you - free from this burning curse. Katara: But you're a great master. You have powers that I will never know. Jeong Jeong: Water brings healing and life. But fire brings only destruction and pain. It forces those of us burdened with its care to walk a razor's edge between humanity and savagery. Eventually, we are torn apart.

Jeong Jeong is the polar opposite of the firebender archetype Katara had in her head. He's thoughtful, disciplined and very careful with his firebending. Jeong Jeong's hatred of his own firebending also stands as a contrast to Katara considering her waterbending a vital and beautiful part of who she is as a person.

I always found it interesting that outside of Aang, Jeong Jeong was one of the first people in the series to respect Katara as a waterbender and see her potential, as he even connects her abilities to great waterbenders. It's especially a stark difference to how he treated Aang, the literal Avatar.

The way Jeong Jeong talks about firebending also reflects what Katara has seen herself of it.

Yet she pushes back at his self depreciation, showing that she still sees the value of his abilities. This foreshadows Katara's compassion for the people of the Fire Nation, especially when paired with Sokka's distrust of them.

I also think it's quite interesting that healing is often involved in Katara's attempts to connect with Fire Nation people. Her first connection is with Jeong Jeong, then she offers to heal Iroh, later Zuko's scar, she heals people in the village during the Painted Lady incident. Finally, the crowning jewel of this series of events is her healing Zuko after the Agni Kai.

This is especially poignant in the story of her and Zuko's relationship, with Katara offering her healing services to him twice, but being either rejected or interrupted. And finally she does heal him at the very end of the show, after he took lightning for her, symbolising a "bridging the gap", so to speak.

I think Katara and Zuko's conversation ties back to Katara's interaction with Jeong Jeong for a few reasons. Firstly, there's the obvious of Katara having a moment with a firebender with a facial scar. Also Katara's wording when she offers to heal Zuko's scar: instead of saying that she's a healer, she says "I have healing abilities ", which is exactly how Jeong Jeong described her power.

Ans once again, Jeong Jeong is the one to protect Katara and buy her time to escape, ehile Zuko betrays her. This once again just shows how far Zuko has yet to go before B3.

I've always thought that the way ceratain Avatar scenes intertwine with themes and similarities is very fascinating and fun to pick apart.

The scene between Zuko and Katara is profound, but I think it's often viewed in isolation, be it due to people wearing ship goggles or it just standing our more. But I think one of the reasons it's so wonderful is that it interweaves into so many other events of "reaching across the isle", of our protagonists connacting with firebenders. It's not just a good character moment for Zuko and Katara, it's a mark that connection and peace with the Fire Nation is possible, that it can be acheived, that it slowly is being acheived. Every one of these interactions is unique, but they all form a good foundation for B3, when we really get into humanising the Fire Nation civillians.

The scene between Zuko and Katara is beautiful not only because of what it is, but also because of what it symbolises: the hope of peace.

Ok this was "stating the obvious", once again brought to you by Quill in their pretentious humanistics student hat. I like to vomit words and some of you like to read them! So thank you if you have read them

[junkdrawerfics]

Swan Sisters (Part 2)

Part 1

Jasper Whitlock x Reader + Bella Swan and Sister! Reader

Summary: An addition to the sister!reader series, where you are Bella's sister and a vampire, not that she knows. Yet. When the car accident happens, you find yourself lost in a mix of concern, lies, and familial arguments. Can you keep Bella quiet when Edward can't?

Word Count: 3645

Warnings: No? Hospitals? Sisters kind of arguing? My midnight editing attempts. Movie-based not book-based (though it hurts my soul)

Note: This one is a lot more Bella / sister!reader focused. Also, I'm realizing this will take many parts because there's so many bits I want to write from this point of view. There will likely be two more parts (at least).

@twilightlover2007 - here's part 2 <3

---

The second you hear about the car accident, everything stops.

Jasper watches you wearily from your bedroom window. He can feel the emotions pouring off of you. Concern. Dread. Fear. Each carrying the force of a violent tidal wave. But you don’t move an inch. You’re frozen in time, like a picturesque statue of pure marble. Despair captured in beauty.

“Is she okay?” You squeak as the shock slowly wears off.

“Yes…” Jasper hesitates, quietly adding, “Edward saved her.”

Edward? He saved her?

“Was he close to her when it happened?”

“...No.”

Alarm bells start ringing, flashing red lights and all. You search Jasper’s eyes, finding your panic reflected in their gold depths. No.

“So he-?”

“Yes.”

“And he-?”

A sharp nod.

Oh dear God.

“We need to go,” you declare, swiping your purse from your bed.

“I can’t.”

“Sure you can!” You flip back to him, but freeze at the stricken look on his face. 

Shame simmers under his pained expression, his eyes clouded with so much self-doubt, you wish you could just take it all away. You didn’t mean to spark that, you didn’t think about what hospitals could mean. Wounded humans. Blood. It’s too dangerous for him to go, you should have known that.

 Overwhelmed with tenderness for the blond, and a touch of guilt, you drop into the windowsill next to him.

“Sorry,” you murmur, voice soft.

You just feel so…so messy. Drawn so taut you could break. Concern filling every cell in your dead body. It wasn’t even like you said anything to hurt him, he knows that, you know that, but it still feels like you made him feel like that.

Jasper, so fully in sync with your emotions, your thoughts, gently brushes his fingers against yours before intertwining them. The gesture is so simple, so reassuring and firm, you can’t stop the shuddering breath from escaping you as you collapse into his side. His arm wraps around you tightly, as if he can hold together all your cracking pieces.

“Sorry,” you bleat again, “I just- I’m just worried, you know? We’ve finally started spending time together, and if she figures out what we are, or worse, something happens, we’ll have to leave. I’m…I’m not ready for that yet. I didn’t mean to speak carelessly.”

“It’s okay, darlin’, I understand.” Jasper’s lips brush against your forehead, his voice low and smooth, lulling your storm back to calm waters. You curl even further into his touch, humming softly. “Why don’t you go check on her, and I’ll find Alice? She might’ve seen somethin’ about all this.” 

“Thanks, Jas.” Your voice is muffled by his sweater, but the blond still hears it, and you can feel a flush of love from him, his power.

“You’re welcome, darlin’. Always.”

It’s difficult to extract yourself from the embrace. Being around Jasper when he’s in a good mood is too addictive, since his emotions usually pour over onto you, even when he doesn’t mean to. His love is like warmth, the kind that starts in your chest and spreads to every inch of your body. It’s the closest you get to feeling alive again.

But you do manage to tear yourself away eventually. Jasper, sensing your reluctance, gives you one of those slanted, teasing grins, “Can’t get enough of me, can you, darlin’?”

“Oh shush.” You scrunch your nose at him, feeling much light as you swing your legs over the windowsill. “Don’t make me regret this whole ‘forever’ thing.”

His eyes practically sparkle with mirth. “I wouldn’t think of it, ma’am.”

You roll your eyes, “Go find Alice, you dummy. I need to go give Edward a serious scolding.”

“Don’t be too hard on him.”

“I know, I know.” You wave a hand dismissively. “I can’t be too mad at him. I just want to screw with him a bit, you know?”

“My mate,” Jasper hums, shaking his head amusedly.

“Count yourself lucky.” 

You duck forward, pressing a brief kiss to his lips before pushing off from the window. It’s a rainy day, the clouds thick and dark like usual, the smell of wet bark and dirt swirling through the air. The familiarity of it all eases the last of your stubborn nerves. When you spin back around, Jasper is right behind you, catching you around the waist and pulling you in for another kiss. 

“I count myself very lucky,” the vampire purrs, your noses brushing, “every day, darlin’.”

“Good, that makes the both of us.” Though you are definitely more lucky. You’ll never understand how you ended up with someone as amazing as Jasper. “Now, go talk to Alice.”

“Be careful at the hospital.”

“Will do, Major.”

You bite back a grin when Jasper shoots you a narrowed look. Before he can get another word out though, you give him a little wink and take off through the woods. 

His low laughter echoes behind you, fading into the hum of the forest.

---

You definitely shouldn’t be here, you think to yourself as you step into the hospital. The smell of blood hits you like a bruising punch to the gut, so hard that you stumble, clutching at the nearest wall for support. You can hear the pulsing heartbeat of each person in the room, the sound of blood rushing through their veins. A siren song. Taunting. Tempting. Your lips part, the smell so thick you can practically taste the warmth on your tongue.

Would their blood taste different because they're sick? 

The thought makes you pale. Disgusting. You’re disgusting. You clench your jaw, bones aching as you force yourself to be still, force your lungs to still.

“Are you okay, (Y/n)?”

Blink. Smile. Be human.

You turn to the nurse at the desk, a girl you recognize as one of your seniors from high school. Merissa? You think that’s her name. She’s looking at you with concern-steepled eyebrows, dark eyes wide.

“Hi! Yah, I’m fine,” you bite out through gritted teeth. “I’m here to see Bella? She got into a car accident.”

“Oh sure! She’s in our general treatment room, your dad just got here too.” She points to one of the sets of doors, “Right through there, I’m sure you’ll have no problem finding her.”

“Thanks!”

And thanks to her interruption, you have a little bit more control over your roving instincts, at least enough to make going into the back less intimidating. When you find your family (due to Charlie’s growling at the poor boy you can only assume was the driver in the accident), Carlisle is already taking a look at Bella.

Thank the heavens for Carlisle. The man is an absolute saint and you’ll never understand how he can spend the whole day here.

“How is she?” You appear at Charlie’s side, making both him and Bella jump.

“Where on Earth did you come from?” Charlie barks, a hand over his heart.

“Jasper told me what happened so I rushed over,” you explain quickly, turning to your sister, “He said it was a crazy accident. The truck just barely missed you? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Bella groans. She’s probably said that a million times by now, but it’s good to hear it from her. It’s even better to see her with your own eyes. No bruises. No blood. She is fine. Lucky for you. “It could have been a lot worse if Edward wasn’t there.”

“Edward? Your boy?” Charlie glances at Carlisle.

The older vampire looks your way, lips pulling into a thin line. A slight nod of your head, almost imperceptible, tells him that you know what happened. Bella just barely catches it.

“It’s kind of amazing he got to me so fast,” she adds on, eyes narrowed, flicking between the two of you. “He was nowhere near me.”

She must already be suspicious. Which means you have to convince her she’s wrong. Which means you need to lie. Again.

“Did you hit your head, Bells?” You plop onto the bed next to her, feigning concern to the best of your abilities. You have to resist the urge to flinch when she glares at you.

“She did,” Carlisle inputs, and Bella shifts her glare to the doctor, though he remains unphased, “No concussion, thankfully, but this kind of incident can have repercussions on the mind, so you’ll want to keep an eye on her. Now, I’m sorry to run, but I have another patient to attend to.” He gives Charlie one of his award winning smiles and steps over to the other boy. 

“I’m not a kid,” Bella all but snaps, her jaw clenching so hard you can practically hear her teeth grinding, “I’d appreciate it if everyone stopped treating me like one.”

“Hey, you’re still my kid,” Charlie retorts, “If Doctor Cullen says we need to be careful, then we will. No arguments.”

Bella just huffs, obviously not happy with the outcome of the discussion. You squeeze her shoulder, but she just shuffles off the bed, barely casting you a glance. Frowning softly, you follow them back towards the front of the hospital.

“Bells,” you start.

She doesn’t let you get far, “I know what I saw. You may not believe me, but I do.”

“It’s not that I don’t believe you-”

“Then why’d you brush me aside like that?” She flips back around to you, stopping dead in the middle of the hall. You do flinch this time. The look on her face, a mix between disappointment and frustration, buried beneath a fine layer of suspicion, sends another stab of guilt through you. 

Charlie glances between the two of you, shuffling awkwardly off to the side. He looks seconds away from fleeing, and you cast him pleading glance, silently begging him to stay. Facing a cougar alone? Easy. Facing Bella’s fury on your own? Down right terrifying.

“I’m gonna go sign some paperwork,” he coughs, and you gape at him as he dashes down the hall. 

Coward!

“I thought you were supposed to have my back?” 

Don’t say that.

“I do, Bells, but you sounded crazy back there.” Each word feels like a burning coal in your mouth.

“Crazy?”

“I mean, yah.” You shrug meekly. “You make it sound like he teleported or something to get to you. It’s a bit far-fetched, you know?”

Bella purses her lips. For just a short moment, doubt clouds her expression. It gives you an inkling of hope, that maybe this can all end well. Maybe she’ll let it go and everything will just go back to normal and you can kick Edward’s butt for being so careless then thank him for saving her. Maybe-

But then her eyes fall on something, someone, behind you, and her brows set into that stubborn line all over again and your hope deflates.

“I’ll be right back. He can clear this all up.” You can't get a word in before she takes off down the hall behind you.

You spin, resisting the urge to groan when your eyes fall on Edward. He’s standing with Carlisle and Rosalie, the vampires murmuring tensely amongst themselves.

If only you’d had a few more minutes.

‘Angry human, incoming.’ You project your thoughts loud and clear.

Edward looks your ways, eyes blowing wide as he catches sight of Bella walking towards them. For a split millisecond, you can read the panic in his expression, just before the facade of composure comes crashing down. Carlisle and Rosalie seemingly disappear as Bella reaches him.

‘Good luck, Ed. You’ll need it.’

If people could sweatdrop, you’re sure you’d be seeing the emote on the vampire right now. Bella isn’t pissed, not yet at least, but one misstep and she could certainly be there. You can only imagine how Edward feels handling this. Probably like a fish out of water, since he can’t hear her thoughts. Serves him right for his impeccable timing.

You prop yourself against the wall, focusing in on their hushed conversation. You hate using your powers for this, to listen in on something that should be private, with your sister no less, but right here, right now, you just can’t afford to give her that. This involves all of you.

“How did you get over to me so fast?” Bella asks, voice much softer than when she was talking to you. 

“I was standing right next to you, Bella,” Edward corrects with an easygoing smile.

That won’t work.

“You were standing next to your car, across the lot,” Bella argues.

“No, I wasn’t.”

“Yes. You were.”

You smile bemusedly. They’re already like an old, married couple.

Edward glares at you over Bella’s shoulder. You glance away, pretending to watch the nurses walking around.

“You hit your head, I think you’re confused.”

“I know what I saw.”

There’s no more uncertainty in her voice.

A heavy sensation settles in your chest.

“You’re not going to let it go, are you?”

“No.”

“Well, I hope you enjoy disappointment.”

---

“Is there anything else you need?” You flutter around the room, grabbing extra blankets, pillows, making sure everything is in reach. Since Charlie had to go back to the department, it up to you to get her settled in before going to find the Cullens.

“I’m fine, (Y/n),” Bella sighs, standing in the doorway with crossed arms. “I don’t understand why I couldn’t just go back to school but Edward could.”

“Perks of having your dad as the doctor,” you chirp with a wry smile.

Bella just rolls her eyes. Stubborn girl. Only she would have a near death experience and then insist on going back to school. Most kids would jump at the chance to have the day off! You know you would.

“Anyways, I got you some water, and aspirin for if your head starts hurting - tell me if it does okay? And I can whip you up some food if you want, or order in, whatever you-”

“(Y/n).”

You cringe, stopping in the middle of fluffing one of the many pillows you brought in. Slowly, the slowest you’ve moved in a long time, you turn to glance at her over your shoulder. And the sight makes your stomach churn, a fresh wave of guilt pouring over you.

Bella’s always been brave. No matter how hard you’ve tried to get her to open up, she’s always hidden her struggles from you. So, seeing her standing there, eyes gleaming with unshed tears, arms curled around herself as if she’s trying to hide from the world, it tears the ground out from under you.

“Do you really not believe me?” Her voice is meek, so different from her usual self.

“Oh, Bells,” you sigh, reaching for her.

But Bella steps away, avoids your touch completely, and that hurts. You clench your fingers, letting your hand fall to your side. You deserve that, you guess. You’ve done nothing but avoid her this whole time. Even now, you’re only here to try and convince her she saw it wrong.

You haven’t exactly been a good sister, have you?

“You don’t.”

“I-” Your jaw clenches. What can you say? You don’t want to lie, not again, not when you know it’ll just drive this wedge further. You can’t lose her, not yet. You’re not ready.

“Well?” Bella scowls, eyes burning holes through you.

You purse your lips, quietly breathing out, “It’s not so simple, Bella.”

“What do you mean?” She takes a step towards you, and you swear you see fire burning along the edges of her figure. You take a step back, wary. “You either believe me or you don’t. What’s so difficult about that?”

“There’s a lot you don’t know.” 

You know you’re not helping. You know the answer should be simple. But so is your desire to love your sister, to keep her in your life, to not let go of one of the good things left of your human life.

“Obviously,” Bella scoffs, “Like why you’re always disappearing now? I feel like I see less of you than when I lived in Phoenix.”

“I can’t-” You cut yourself off, biting your tongue.

“Can’t what?

“I can’t talk about it,” you finish weakly.

“Why?”

“It’s not mine to talk about!”

“Why? You seem to be a part of it, whatever it is.”

“Because, Bells, it just isn’t! And you need to stop poking around it.”

“So you are hiding something.”

“Y- No!” You groan, collapsing onto the bed. “Just drop it Bella, please, for me.”

Bella just shakes her head, “I can’t.”

An abrupt silence fills the room, settling heavily over the two of you. You’re both heaving, tense with more to say but no fight left to do it. You can’t budge, and neither will she. A heavy sigh passes your lips as you drag a hand over your face.

What a mess.

The bed shifts as Bella sits next to you. You glance at her, eyes narrowed, tired, and she looks just as worn out. It’s been a long time since you’ve fought like this.

“...I’m sorry, Bells.” Your voice is quiet, pained. No response.

Seconds tick by like hours until she breaks the silence again to ask, “Can you just tell me one thing?” 

You should say it depends. The less you reveal the better, considering you definitely just made this all worse. You’ve always had a sucky poker face. But you can’t bring yourself to say it, to keep this exhausting facade up, so you just offer a slow nod.

Bella hesitates, brows synching as she scans your face, “Do I…Do I need to be worried about you in all of this?”

Irony.

At its finest.

With a melancholic smile, you shake your head, “No Bells, I’m okay. I’m happy, actually. I’m just worried about you.”

“Okay.”

And just like that, the tension drips away, leaving the two of you in a comfortable moment of acceptance. You lean against her shoulder, relief flooding you when she doesn’t lean away. Her head even falls against your shoulder, just like when you were younger. 

This is what you’ve missed.

And it’s only then, with your nose touching her hair, that you realize her scent doesn’t smell nearly as appealing to you. You hadn’t even noticed it this whole time. A tiny grin captures your lips as you shut your eyes. Finally.

“Can I ask you something?” You hum eventually.

“Depends.”

This time, you roll your eyes, “What do you think of Edward?”

Bella’s face immediately flushes a deep crimson, and that’s enough of an answer for you. Your grin turns teasing as you jostle her lightly.

“You like him, don’t you?”

She scoffs, “As if.”

But her eyes look everywhere but at you.

“You’re horrible at lying, Bells,” you giggle.

“No, I’m not.”

“Then why are you blushing?”

“Well, it’s just- that’s just totally insane. Edward? No, he’s like so…weird and bipolar.”

“And cute,” you chime, earning a glare from the younger Swan.

“Shut up.”

“You’re not denying it.”

“I don’t like Edward.”

“Okaaay~”

You hop to your feet and Bella barely catches herself on the bed, casting you a not too fierce glare.

“Seriously, (Y/n).”

“No, I totally believe you, Bella,” you sing as you glide to the door.

“I don’t like him.”

“Me neither.”

“(Y/n).”

You pause at the doorway, looking back at her with a wolfish grin.

“Bella.”

She’s somehow even more red, practically fuming.

“He doesn’t even like me! You saw how he acted today.” Her face falls at the memory, and you can’t help but shake your head.

To think, even after an argument, you can still have moments like this.

This is worth fighting for.

“Just give it time, Bella.” She looks up at you, and you can see in her eyes, the desperate wish for answers, answers you can’t share. Yet. “He was a jerk today, and trust me, he’ll get a whoopin’ for it, but I stand by what I said. Edward is a good guy. He just…well, he’s got a villain complex, let’s put it that way.”

The brunette snorts, a slight smile disrupting her usual cloudy expression. Good, you think proudly. Your pretty sister shouldn’t look so down, especially over a dumb vampire who doesn’t know how to handle girls, at all.

“Are you off to give him a ‘whoopin’?” Bella asks, putting the word in air quotes.

“Something like that,” you muse, slipping past the doorway. You stop just past it, thinking for just a moment before you flip back again, clinging to the frame as you lean in, “I know you’re not going to stop looking Bella, but will you please keep what happened quiet? Can you trust me on that at least?”

“I won’t tell anyone,” she reassures you, and that’s enough.

You nod, “Thanks Tinkerbell.”

“(Y/n), I swear-”

“Bye!”

You’re almost down the stairs, laughing like a maniac, by the time she comes chasing after you. Even before you were a vampire, she never could match up to you in a race.

“I’ll tell Edward you said hi!” You call as you reach the door.

“Don’t you dare!”

You slam it shut behind you, taking off towards your car. Bella flings it back open, but doesn’t break past the threshold, merely glaring at you from the house. You flash her a blinding grin as you pull out of the driveway, fingers wiggling in a little wave.

Your cheeks might split from how wide you’re grinning as you race down the roads of Forks to the Cullen’s house.

Who knew things could be like this again. You never hoped in your wildest dreams that you could have this back once you changed. And now that you know it’s there, it’s possible, you can’t just let it go. No matter the storms, no matter the arguments, this is worth protecting.

Hopefully you can convince the others of it as well.

---

I love writing the sister dynamic. I don't have sisters, so I don't know if it's accurate, but this is what I'd hope my sister and I would be like.

I hope I'm balancing it all well, and I hope you guys enjoyed this part!

Part 3

[f1llory]

i know this all started like 11 years ago but i'm still so mad at how the hunger games movies have removed practically every trace of the avoxes that they can. i know that movies can't include everything from the books, but the avoxes are so important to the story and it does a real disservice to the movies by removing them. also, it would have added maybe a couple minutes per movie to include them the way they were in the books.

there are mentions of them here and there, and we do see lavinia briefly, but the only avox who's there in any meaningful way is pollux. and they couldn't take him out of the movie! not only is he important to include with the camera crew, he has to be there because he's the one who leads the group through the tunnels. if it were possible to cut him out of mockingjay, i think they would have.

removing so many scenes with lavinia genuinely detracted from my enjoyment of the first movie. especially witnessing her capture & carrying the guilt about it. when there are avoxes waiting on her, katniss does treat them politely, but i think it would have been so important & impactful to see her truly recognizing lavinia and her humanity and trying to communicate with her like anyone else. fixing this probably wouldn't add more than like 5 minutes to the runtime, but it would be such an improvement.

and don't even get me started with darius being removed from the movies. maybe he shows us a little less about katniss's character than lavinia would, but the mentions of him in catching fire add so much to our imagination of the hob and illustrate just how different peacekeepers were in district 12. this is also the first time this has happened to someone katniss actually knows. i think this would take maybe a minute and a half to fix? at most. really all we would need to see is darius talking to katniss in the hob, then being one of the peacekeepers getting captured when thread takes over.

obviously they kept pollux in because they literally couldn't remove him from mockingjay. i don't really have any complaints about his portrayal in the movies, which is kind of surprising given how passionate i am about him. also, the movie actually portrayed castor's death better than the book! it wasn't really in the book, basically castor was there and then he wasn't. so the movie version has a lot more impact.

also, it sucks that we didn't get to hear what happened to lavinia and darius. i always have intense second-hand embarrassment at the fact that in the book, peeta realizes pollux is an avox then immediately starts trauma dumping about seeing lavinia and darius tortured to death. if it were done as written in the movie, i might have experienced literal physical pain. but at the same time, i think it's very important that katniss finds out what happened to them. also in the books, squad 451 hears all the avoxes in the tunnels screaming as the mutts kill them. i feel like that would have been really easy to add in.

anyways we are moving on before i write an entire dissertation on pollux.

it was even worse in tbosas! the movie cut the scene where snow sees dr. gaul experimenting on and torturing avoxes. it would have been absolutely horrifying to see that translated to the screen, but it's incredibly important to snow's character development and his transformation into someone who both allows and perpetuates that cruelty. also, justice for ma plinth! i think it would have been incredible to see more of her and the way she treats people. in the book, she is so kind and caring to the avoxes working in her house. they're able to communicate with her, and she cooks food that will be easy for them to eat. since treating the avoxes as remotely human is so unusual, treating them with such love and respect is a revolutionary act, and goes to show what kind of person sejanus was raised to be. i know that this would add quite a bit to the runtime, but it probably should have been two movies anyways.

i know that side/background characters are cut from movies all the time. it happens. but even without getting a lot of lines, the avoxes are incredibly important to the story. these are people who have been enslaved, tortured, and dehumanized more than basically anyone else in panem. once characters truly see the avoxes, they're forced to confront the true brutality of the capitol and what they'll do to keep people in line. i think the movies don't truly force audiences to confront the brutality of this punishment. any rebellion is punished by literally robbing people of their voices and cutting them off from everything they've known. even if there's someone left to buy their freedom, they're physically disfigured for life--even removal of part of the tongue can have catastrophic side effects.

also, characters' perceptions of avoxes can say a lot about the kind of person they are. avoxes are the lowest class in panem, and treated with about as much agency as a piece of furniture. people aren't supposed to treat them like people. they're only supposed to talk to avoxes when giving them an order. despite this, there are certain characters who choose to show them kindness and love.

anyways i'm gonna end this here before i write a post so long it crashes tumblr but pls ask me literally anything about pollux i am in love w him <3

[ice-cream-writes-stuff]

Hello! I just saw your Matriarch post! Can you possibly do a prologue about her backstory and her going to the other dimension with a batfamily and batmom that are still alive and together? And possibly a part 1 where she just walks into the Batcave one night after she sends out an all-call to the bats and the league and once they all start questioning what is going on she comes out and tells them about her backstory and how she'll prevent her future from happening by offing the rogues one by one and saying something like "I'm the only one who could ever succeed in doing this. And do you know why... it's because I know exactly how each and every hero and villain alike think. I know every plan and protocol in place that both sides of the gallery (i.e. meaning the heroic side and villainous side) have in place, how to stop or outsmart them, and every single possible move any of you could make against me. If you think you can stop your wife, mother, friend, or whatever else I am to you, then by all means... I invite you all to play my game, if you can capture me AND discover my plan, then I'll stop for good and go back to my time. But should I be victorious, well, the world and all of you are MINE."

Sorry for it being so long! And for the long monologue!

[Damn, that is good!!]

[Matriarch Au]

Notes.

In this au (Y/N) pretends to be a hero for the public sake. A part-timer of the league in the future.

Bruce doesn't know (but has suspicion) she is killing or torturing almost half of his rouge gallery.

She's afraid that Bruce won't love her become of his no-killing code.

There's technically a "(Y/N)" in this timeline who meets Bruce and falls in love. But, The Matriarch technically killed her before she could meet Bruce.

But here's another question. How does this (Y/N) interact with the Batfamily?

Since (Y/N) knows of each horrible thing that has happened to her children and lover. Batmom is very protective then most other Batmoms.

She still wants to give her children freedom, but also knows that when she did... They were beaten or almost killed for the sake of protecting others.

Batmom decided to mess with this world's timeline so it would be better than her own. But still deliberately decided to let some things stay the same.

1st Example, Dick Grayson. Now depending if Batmom came around before Dicks parents demise is up to you. But in this instance where she did, Batmom would try to save his parents but it doesn't work out.

2nd would be Jason, this is where it gets kinda fucked up.

Batmom is a very caring individual but Matriarch isn't.

Batmom would do whatever she can to make sure Jason will never know of his mother being alive. Batmom will even go out of her way to guilt-trip Jason and emotionally manipulate him. To the point where he doesn't care if his real mother is alive or dead.

But, if Jason does end up curious and decides to find his mother. Aw hell he ain't gonna be free from Batmoms protection. Including Matriarch.

Batmom will get Bruce on her side to not let Jason out of the house or better yet city to look for his mother. It will take a lot of convincing and emotional manipulation part two. Anything regarding Jason's mother or possibly anyone close to bearing resemblance is wiped from the Bat-computer database.

If Jason managed to find a way to convince Batmom or escape Gotham. You are three steps ahead as Batmom or Matriarch.

The only way Jason could even wind up dead is if Batmom was a second too late.

From that point on if that happens, it'll be a much worse for the latter members and friends of the Batfam.

(Y/N) has and will install trackers on everything and anyone. Your always listening, always alert.

You'll put on the facade sure, but the truth of it all is that.. You're no longer just "scared". No you're terrified, to the point you have the smallest threat or villain is your biggest enemy.

-

[I'll write more for Batmom/Yandere/Villain reader! I swear! If you guys want more let me know, I still gotta describe how Matriarch Au deals with villains.]

[Maybe even write a angst dead dove do not eat fic later hopefully. Thank you for reading!]

[jjtheresidentbaby]

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ one and the same ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

|| ashlyn banner & tyler hernandez

summary: ashlyn has dealt with worse than an argument with tyler, but when it sends her into headspace midway through a night in the phantom dimension it can become a problem

just lil disclaimer; don’t like, don’t read. I’m only saying this because it’s a smaller fandom and I’ve seen some pretty hostile comments about topics and I really don’t want to deal with any of that <3

warnings: little!ashlyn, caregiver!tyler, caregiver!ben, set after tyler gets out of the hospital/is healed, hurt/comfort, arguing, involuntary regressing, crying, non verbal!ash is mentioned, nicknames, tyler is practically ash’s older brother now

-

“We can’t just stay put forever!” Tyler groans and runs a hand through his hair, the school bus creaking under his pacing feet.

“I’m not saying we stay put forever but- we can’t just run out there either.” Ashlyn sighs, looking over at Taylor who’s stood closest to Tyler and has been trying to get him to calm down. It’s been almost a full month since Tyler healed from the tree incident and while he had been content on waiting to go past the graveyard walls for awhile because of Taylor’s worries, he’s not so keen on the idea anymore. They need to do something, get out of here, find out more about the phantoms, anything.

“Then we should come up with a plan like I’ve been saying.” It’s angry and hot, Tyler’s eyes pointed towards Ashlyn with all the fire in the world. She looks away in seconds and takes a deep breath to try and steady herself, they’ve been standing here arguing for at least an hour, Ashlyn has also been slowly slipping into her headspace throughout it all. It’s the worst possible timing in the world and she’s trying to push it away but isn’t sure it’s really working.

“The plan you’re proposing isn’t safe.” Running out and trying to capture a phantom to study it is the only thing Tyler’s suggested, nobody’s agreed with him, not even Aiden.

“Well it’s something! You’re the leader and you haven’t given a single idea.” The leader is said in almost a mockery, Ashlyn gets it. She’s the one that took on that label and she hasn’t done an amazing job at keeping everyone safe. No matter how many times Tyler reminds her that what happened wasn’t her fault, she can still feel the small amount of resentment he holds against her. She’s not mad about it or going to tell him to get over it or anything, but it hurts when she feels this vulnerable.

Since the trip to Savannah Ashlyn hasn’t been able to regress, it used to be something she did before bed, just to destress and sleep better, but now she’s got monsters to fight. Literally. She had thought going without regressing would be fine and it has been, til this week. There’s no reason she can pinpoint on why her little space has been begging to come out, she just knows it is, and that her eyes burn with tears because of it. The more emotional side of her always comes to the surface when she’s little.

“I- I think we should take time to come up with a more cohesive plan.” Her hands clench and unclench by her sides, voice an odd quietness that Taylor and Aiden definitely pick up on as they give her a questioning concerned look. She ignores it.

“To do what!? You’re supposed to be the one coming up with plans and taking charge, so what are we going to do?” Tyler steps closer to Ashlyn as her mouth opens only close. She’s definitely slipped now, she can feel it, all the emotions flooding into her system, the fear almost feels suffocating. There’s sounds of monsters all around her and she has Tyler standing in front of her looking extra pissed off, she doesn’t know what’s worse, the ear torture or the guilt that her friend is so upset because of her.

“Tyler-.” Taylor starts and Tyler turns to look at her but when he does Ashlyn stumbles backwards, hitting Ben’s chest with a flinch and high pitched noise she hadn’t meant to let out.

Her heart is beating two times faster than it should be and her body curls back into Ben as far as it can, tears building in her eyes and terror spiked in her chest. She didn’t mean to do that, she knows Tyler would never hurt her, she trusts him, really she hadn’t meant to—. The tears she was holding back start to slip down her cheeks and she quickly turns to hide her face in Ben’s chest.

“Ashlyn…” The sudden hand on her back only makes her jump again, hands clinging to Ben’s shirt with enough of a grip that she could tear the fabric in two.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t- I didn’t mean to-.” A choked off sob stops her from continuing the small pleas. There’s a shake to her body that only makes her more scared, she wants to go home, she wants to be safe, she doesn’t want to be standing in a school bus trembling and feeling herself slip further down into headspace. It’s only a matter of time until she goes completely non-verbal, something that’s never been an issue but definitely will be here.

“Ash, it’s okay, nobody’s upset.” Aiden speaks slow and soft, they make eye contact when she turns her head to the side against Ben’s chest. He gives his cousin a small nod before Ben hesitantly starts to wrap his arms around Ashlyn’s back to hold her in closer, tightening them when she doesn’t flinch away from the motion.

“Can you talk to us? Tell us what’s wrong, if- if it’s Tyler I swear he’d never do anything to hurt you.” Taylor comes to stand beside Aiden with her teeth chewing her bottom lip in nerves. Ashlyn can see Tyler behind her shoulder, he’s still pacing but it’s less angry and more worried, she feels horrible for making them all so concerned.

“No- no it’s not Ty’s fault, I’m sorry- I just- everything’s so much. I wanna go home, I wanna be safe, I don’t wanna be here.” A childlike tone drapes over Ashlyn’s words that makes more tears run down her cheeks. She doesn’t know where that nickname for Tyler came from, or why she’s being so honest and not trying to make her answers to sound more normal, less like she’s a child despite how she feels.

“Oh sweetheart…” Taylor says as if she can read through every thought Ashlyn has, can see just how vulnerable she’s being.

“Why don’t you and Ben sit down, okay? Just try and breathe, it’s okay.” The direction is followed easily and as soon as Ben’s sat with his back pressed to the wall and window of the bench closest to them Ashlyn finds herself curling against him again. It’s probably a bad idea, probably raises a million red flags for the others, but laying her head down on Ben’s chest to listen to his heartbeat is helping her feel calmer so she allows herself some grace. And she knows if Ben was uncomfortable or didn’t want her there he’d push her away.

“Want some water?” Logan appears over the seat in front of Ashlyn and Ben, his eyes flicking around their faces nervously, he obviously doesn’t know how to help or what to say. Ashlyn shakes her head and closes her eyes against Ben’s shirt, she’s exhausted and wants to go to sleep but knows she can’t, there’s monsters close by that could attack at any moment. She needs to stay alert, as much as she can while regressed anyways.

“Ashlyn are you sure you’re okay? I didn’t mean to scare you.” Tyler questions in the most hesitant voice Ashlyn’s ever heard him use. He’s usually so sure of himself, not afraid to speak his mind, not afraid to say things with his full chest, never this anxious about simply talking.

“M’okay.” Her face untucks just enough for her to see how Tyler’s stood in the aisle in front of where her and Ben are sitting. His eyes are big and hands fidgeting restlessly, Ashlyn reaches out for him before she can fully think it through, just wanting him to calm down, for things to not feel so stressful.

Tyler takes the offer after a short pause, sitting on the seat next to Ben when he shifts his knees up so there’s enough room. Ashlyn crawls her way off of Ben’s chest to Tyler’s, more careful with how she sits on him as she’s still petrified that he’ll be in pain because of the tree injuries, but she quickly relaxes when his hand starts to rub up and down her back. The sound of his heartbeat is a little faster than Ben’s was but it drowns out some of the monster sounds the same.

“Taylor used to sit with me like this when we were little, she’d make me carry her around anywhere she could too. I’m not sure I’ll be able to carry you as easily though carrot top.” A small smile spreads over Tyler’s face as he talks. Ashlyn sinks into every word, they feel safe and comfortable, like Tyler’s telling her it’s okay in some odd way. It’s okay that she’s upset, that she wants to go home, wants comfort, as if he’s assuring her that he’ll take care of her the same way he does his biological sister. As if they’re one and the same.

[lya-dustin]

Rules: Share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture their character/personality/vibe. Bonus points for just using the dialogue without other details about the scene, but you’re free to include those as well.

Thanks for the tag @queen--kenobi

Tagging: @slytherincursebreaker @redwolf17 @arcielee @mini-kunoichi @toms-cherry-trees @zablife @justrainandcoffee @dreamlandcreations

Going with dialogue from All is Bliss for this

1)“You get to inherit his claim.

Although mine is much higher, so really, your brother dying without legitimate issue is more of a problem for the Greens than it is for the Blacks.

I get to appoint an heir from those available or marry someone of my choosing and have my own.I might even marry you if you’re still available and prevent your mother and grandfather from putting my family to the sword.” She answers, having thought all of this through already.

2)“I wish it had been you.” She said with such melancholy in her eyes as he rested his head against hers wishing it didn’t have to end with her going back to his brother.

3)“I must do this, I cannot be turned into a second version of my mother for their personal gain.

Aegon must not have heirs and I cannot have a sword hanging over my neck by giving him one.” The princess said as they took the tonics from the apothecary's wife who gave loud instructions for the tonic she did not buy.

4)“Silverwing may be the most docile of the dragons, but she is a dragon nonetheless. I merely reminded her not to forget I am a dragon.” Aemma answered.

5)“I am sorry for humiliating you in front of everybody, had I had a choice, I would have not done it.” The princess means it, her periwinkle eyes serious and her face showing genuine guilt.

6)“Yes, he does, but have you considered that this would invite speculation on any children Aegon claims as his?” this she asks looking at her directly. “We all know any child I have will not be his, who is to say someone will speak the truth as my great uncle will do tomorrow and call into question the succession?”

7)“I ask that you spare him only because he is the grandfather of your granddaughter and he is my blood.” Aemma had said when she asked him to spare Vaemond’s life. “Give him whatever punishment you believe is just, but I only ask that you do not make a martyr for the Greens to uphold the moment you die.”

8)She looked up at him with bewilderment and dried her tears with her sleeve. “Out of all the things you could have said you chose that. Has it ever occurred to you that the same insults you used tonight will be used against our children?”

9)“I would have believed my husband to be man enough to come here, Lord Borros. But then again, he was never expected to be more than his grandsire’s puppet.” Aemma said not bothering to look like the innocent maiden she was before her wedding.

10)“Ah, but you see, Ser Otto, Princess Aemma Velaryon is no more. I am Queen Aemma Targaryen now, I have been so since the day my mother and sister died because of your and your daughter’s treachery.

Present your queen’s terms.” Aemma felt nervous, a thrill at being able to say what she wanted to say and know there were no longer any consequences for it.

11)“Fine, I put the pillow over his face until he stopped thrashing, and the maid took the blame when your mother heard we killed him.

I do not care that it is sin and a crime and everything in between because gods-damnit it felt good to know I was finally free of him.” she cannot stop once she gets started and by the end of it, the queen sees the shock written in his face.

12)“I am sorry for your loss, goodmother.” Aemma says the words genuinely, which makes it all even worse.

13)“Thank the gods, I felt dirty and used when it hit me that I was whoring myself ---and you---for a semblance of power here.” She admitted avoiding his gaze through the looking glass.

14)“We could always offer her to Daemon, he is a widower with four healthy children, and sure he has no household, but the Stepstones are still his technically.” Aemma says as if Aegon was jesting, making it seem as it was all a joke and that he wasn’t considering his mother as chattel.

15)“Don’t get pregnant, Baela. It’s like a coup on your body.” Aemma jokes to try and lighten herself up. And sure, enough the flutter passes as Aemond charges at his opponent.

Went only up to chapter 43 because holy shit the fic is long

[sungbeam]

𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫

▶ kim seungmin x reader

▶ yours and seungmin's relationship in reverse chronological order; inspired by ms swift's the very first night and cruel summer

▶ 3.5k words, angst, fluff, end of the world type vibe

a/n: yes, you read that correctly, this is in reverse chronological order! and yes, that means a breakup

SEVEN

The party's bass was steadily making your headache worse. The sharp and distinct smell of alcohol had your head spinning with memories of the past that you wished didn't appear in your head at the most inopportune moments. You scented the bourbon your friend, Jake, chugged beside you, coaxing you to take a sip of the liquid with him.

"Just a couple sips, bestie," he slurred. "It'll make you feel better. Promise!"

"I'm okay, Jake," you told him, gently pushing the bottle away. He was too far gone to be worried about why you had refused.

The dress your friend Yeji had shoved over your head stuck to your body like a second skin, making you feel naked. There were too many prying eyes undressing you throughout the living room of the frat house, and you wondered if you could sink into the cushions of the couch.

"Cheer up, Ynie," Yeji pouted as she collapsed onto the couch cushions next to you. She handed you a sealed can of ginger ale, the exact beverage you had requested.

"Thanks," you murmured, cracking the can open.

Yeji eyed you as you guzzled down a decent amount of the soda. The bubbles stung your nose when you came up for air, but it was better than waking up with a pounding headache in the morning. "I know you don't want to talk about him, but I just wanna help."

And you couldn't be more grateful for that. Guilt pierced your chest; it wasn't exactly fair to Yeji that you were so closed off to her. "I'm sorry," you sighed, raising your voice slightly so she could hear you, "I just—"

Your voice died in your throat. You felt the distinct feeling of eyes on you, and when you turned your head to look, you found his. He stood across the room from you, surrounded by familiar faces—his friends—as he nursed a red solo cup in his hands.

Kim Seungmin wore an unreadable mask over his face as he stared at you. If you had been anyone else, it would have only looked like a casual stare in your direction, but you knew what he was thinking. You had spent too many long, sleepless nights to not understand him.

Bitterness filled your throat and you had the sudden urge to get out. To get out of this room, out of this house, out of this town—far away from him. Anything to numb the fucking pain.

The polaroid burned a square through your purse and through your lap where your bag sat.

You nudged Jake, swiping the bourbon from him and setting the ginger ale down. Yeji watched in muted sadness and pity as you dumped the liquid down your throat and let it burn you from the inside out.

SIX

You bumped the front door to your apartment close with your hip as you shuffled through the stack of mail you had just retrieved from the downstairs box. There were the typical bills and advertisements in the mix, the latter of which you would probably end up tossing away later.

As you leaned on the kitchen counter to sort through the mail, you froze.

There, in the fray of water bills and bank statements, there was an envelope. It was small, like one of those unassuming Hallmark cards without the cheesy sayings. The only thing was that you recognized the elegant scrawl on the back of the envelope, below the stamp.

You wanted to laugh. He didn't want to see you so much that he paid for a stamp. He couldn't even risk seeing you, could he?

You tore the envelope apart, only to have a polaroid slip from its jaws. It drifted to the floor and you caught it quickly between two fingers.

Heart pounding, eyes stinging—it was you and Seungmin. Actually, it was from the very first night the two of you met. He didn't seem like the kind of guy to be bold, but the polaroid had captured the moment he had cupped the back of your head and kissed you. Like he didn't give a damn, like you were the only two people in the world, like this was the start of something beautiful.

And it had been something beautiful. But beautiful things break sometimes.

Anger suddenly boiled beneath your skin, heating your blood. Why would he send this to you? Was it some sort of taunt? Some sort of—

Your eyes caught onto a flash of pale blue. There was a small blue sticky note taped to the back. There it was again, his script.

Miss you like it was the very first night. - Min

You decided you hated Kim Seungmin for doing this to you.

FIVE

It was 11:43AM when Kim Seungmin broke your heart.

"I don't think this'll work out, Yn."

The two of you were sitting in one of your favorite casual eating and drinking spots just by campus. Seungmin liked the croissants here, especially, and the two of you used to share strawberry milkshakes at the bar. But now, you sat with a table separating you, each with two separate drinks.

You didn't respond immediately. No, you couldn't respond immediately. There was no proper reaction to someone saying that to you so suddenly, out of the blue. The words could not leave your tongue and you were helplessly speechless. And speechlessness was never good if one wanted an upper hand against Seungmin.

You stared long and hard at him. Wondered how he could fool you with such deep, dark eyes and that beautiful smile. That smile was nowhere to be seen, only cold solemnity.

Oh, he was serious.

You managed to finally speak. "Why not?"

Seungmin sighed, like he didn't think he'd have to explain. "Well, we're not even gonna see each other much anyway. We're in different departments, different grades, different sides of campus. My internship is starting soon and you have an interview with that big company, too, soon."

You mean the interview I wouldn't have gotten without you?

"And we can't try?" You whispered, your voice embarrassingly soft. You were trying—trying to fight tooth and nail for this relationship. You didn't want it to slip from your fingers, water through a faucet. Because you and Seungmin were not water through a faucet, but the stars in the sky—bright and gleaming and infinite.

Right?

"Sweetheart." There was a shine in his eyes; he didn't want this either. But why? Why, why, why— "I just… I just don't think I can handle it."

"Oh." Handle what? You wanted to scream. "For what it's worth," you gulped and opened your mouth to say the words, but suddenly found that they were caught in your throat. I love you. "I don't think I could handle it either."

Liar.

Seungmin seemed to release a breath he had been holding. He fidgeted with the watch on his wrist, unable to meet your eyes. "I'll, uhm, I'll see you around then." Liar.

"Yeah, same to you," you smiled as he stood up from his chair. Liar.

Seungmin flashed you a small, sad smile in return. And then he was gone—the only thing left of him was the lingering aroma of his cologne and the café bell above the door ringing in the air.

FOUR

Seungmin swung the door to the hotel room open and it banged against the back wall with a shudder. He lowered his mouth to your ear, murmuring, "Open."

Your eyelids fluttered open and a small gasp fell from your lips. You stepped across the threshold as if in a daze, and you partly were. The view held you captive. The windows at the far side of the penthouse suite looked out upon the city of Los Angeles below you. Warm lights glowed from its core, the Hollywood sign backing the cityscape far in the distance.

He came up behind you, arms wrapping your waist and kissing behind your ear. "How'd I do?"

You twisted around, pressing your mouth to his. "It's gorgeous, Minnie."

"Me or the view?"

You laughed and looped your arms around his neck. "Are you an 'it'?"

He beamed. "For you? I'd be anything you wanted me to be." A thought suddenly occurred to him, and he was leading you to the corner of the living room toward a vintage record player. He turned it on, setting the needle on the already set vinyl record. "Isn't this neat?"

"Did this place come with it?" You asked, marveling at the polished wood and the pretty violin crooning from its speakers.

Seungmin nodded, and held his hands out for you to take. "Yeah, I didn't even plan for it."

You took his left hand in yours, bracing the other on his shoulder. His right hand gently held onto your waist, and the two of you slipped into a loose waltz. Both of your forms were silhouetted against the window now, the stars bright like studded diamonds in a blanket of dark midnight colored velvet.

One-two-three, one-two-three…

Seungmin twirled you around to the sounds of your giggles, his smile as wide as his face, and then you were back in his hold. His arms were warm around you, hands so solid that his loving touch was tangible. And home, you decided, was right here.

Later in the night, the two of you found yourselves once again in each other's arms, but seated on the floor of the living room. You watched the stars outside, watched the city below. The record played softly in the background—it was a different track from before.

You brushed your hand through Seungmin's dark hair; you felt him lean into your touch, eager, begging. "Thank you, Minnie, for doing this."

Seungmin hummed and took your hand. He laced his fingers with yours before bringing your knuckles to his lips. "You deserve it," he murmured.

A beat of silence. "Hey, sweetheart?"

"Mhm."

"You won't leave me, right?"

You frowned at him and nuzzled the side of your face with the top of his head. "No, of course not. I…" I’m in love with you. "I couldn't imagine life without you."

He squeezed your hand. "Me neither."

THREE

You picked up his call on the third ring, having rushed across yours and Yeji’s apartment in order to reach where you had left your phone on the bathroom counter. Yeji was deep asleep on the living room couch after the two of you had spent the entire evening binging the Harry Potter movies.

His contact name shone brightly in your face, just as bright as the pretty smile he had in the picture. "Hello?"

"Hi sweetheart," he greeted softly. "Sorry, my roommates just fell asleep. You're not asleep yet?"

Your eyes darted to where Yeji was out in the living room dead asleep. "Oh, not yet. Yeji and I were watching some movies, but she fell asleep. And I can ask you the same thing, mister." But then again, even if you had been asleep, you had a feeling you would have woken up to answer his call anyway.

He hummed, and you could hear him shift around in his bed. "Wish you were here with me."

The heart in your chest beat a little faster. It practically fluttered like the butterflies in your stomach. "I wish I was there with you, too, Minnie."

"Do you know how much I miss you?"

You could imagine. Sometimes when you laid in bed alone, you could feel the ghost of his arms and heat around you. Sleep just came easier when you were with him, you had realized. You murmured, "Do you know how much I miss you? I think I'm getting Seungmin cuddle withdrawal," you joked. Well, half joked. You kind of were getting Seungmin cuddle withdrawal.

His quiet chuckle met your ear, breathy and light. "You're so cute, Yn-ie. Maybe we should… remedy that."

"What would you suggest then?" You asked, drawing circles on the bathroom counter, biting your lip to suppress a smile.

"Go out of town with me. Let's run away together for a little."

You smiled out of pure giddiness. "Okay."

"Okay," he whispered back. "Get some sleep then, okay? Sweet dreams, sweetheart."

"Miss you, Min. Sweet dreams." And as you hung up the call, you couldn't help but dance around a little on the balls of your feet, like you'd just won a million dollars. Because that was what it felt like—seeing Seungmin, missing Seungmin, and loving Seungmin. You didn't want to know what it would be like without him.

TWO

The world was spinning.

Your throat burned from alcohol and your eyes burned from tears. You couldn't register how long you had been hunched over on that barstool, but it was long enough that the bartender had cut off your drinks and asked if you had a ride home for the night. You told him no, because none of your friends knew you were here and they were all busy anyway.

None of them knew what happened today, and you didn't want them to ever know.

"Yn?"

Your head lifted from your hands and you recognized the familiar, puppy eyes scrutinizing you with pity and worry. "Seungmin?" The memories flickered past your mind; they tried to remember, tried to associate him with a certain emotion.

You, at last, smiled. "Hi!"

Seungmin frowned deeper at your change in mood, but he tried to smile for your sake. "Hey, sweetheart. What're you doing here? Is Yeji here with you?"

"No, she's busy." You shook your head, stretching your arms over your head with a yawn. "What're you doing here?"

"I, uh, got a call." His eyes darted to the bartender, whose name tag read Changbin on its surface, before returning to you. Seungmin carefully helped you off the stool, as if handling a baby deer. "Let's get you home, yeah?"

You shook your head. "Can't—" you choked. "Can't go home."

Seungmin paused in the middle of the walkway. "Why not, sweetheart?"

"Mom and dad don't want me to go back." You felt warmth trickle down the sides of your cheeks again and you sniffled. "Got dropped from my internship because this bitch thought it'd be fun to spread rumors about me. When I told them the truth, they turned me away."

You didn't catch Seungmin's reaction, but his expression had softened considerably. He brought you into his chest and held you in his embrace for a long moment. You exhaled a shaky breath, then breathed in the comforting scent of his cologne.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” he murmured into your hair. Then he was placing a hand on the small of your back and helping you into his car. “Come on. You can crash at my place tonight.”

Seungmin drove you back to his apartment, explaining to you that his roommates were either out partying or dead asleep in their rooms. And he would tuck your form into his bed, your back to his chest, as the both of you drifted off to sleep. His warmth, his scent—all of it engulfed you in this feeling of infinite bliss. It was the most loved you felt in a long time.

ONE

The party's bass was steadily making your headache worse. Your day at work had been the absolute worst, as it had been for the past few weeks. This coworker of yours had been trying to spread nasty rumors about you to try and get management to fire you. The reason? You could only guess it was because you got the promotion and she didn't.

Yeji and Jake had collectively dragged you out to party and get your mind off the whole bullshit situation. You had pulled out minimal stops tonight since you were only here to have fun and drink a bit. You didn't really anticipate catching anyone's attention tonight, with your pleated skirt and T-shirt and sneakers. Really, the only attractive thing was the vodka on the rocks in your hand, the liquid swirling in the plastic cup. Yeji was in the living room dancing and Jake had gone to the bathroom, which left you by your lonesome on this kitchen stool. You didn't really mind though.

"There must be something really interesting about that drink."

You glanced up from your cup to find a boy next to you. He wasn't necessarily dressed to impress either—he wore a gray hoodie and dark colored pants, but his dark hair were lightly curled and hung delicately over his forehead. "Oh, heh, yeah. It's just vodka."

The boy rounded the counter and grabbed a brand new plastic cup. "Rough day?"

"More like rough month," you scoffed, dunking the last of the bitter liquid down your throat. "It's been… interesting." You shook your head. "Sorry, this conversation is so sad. I'm Yn."

He beamed, and you decided his smile was the cutest you had ever seen. It reminded you of Jake's puppy-esque expression. "Seungmin." He scanned the array of bottles on the counter and began selecting his poisons. "So, Yn, would you like a good drink, or are you okay with just your vodka?"

"Uh, I don't know about you, but vodka is a perfectly good drink." He deadpanned incredulously, eyebrow raised. You added, "Okay, a good drink please."

Seungmin chuckled, winking at you. "Coming right up."

Seungmin's drink ended up being one of the best things you've tasted for a long time, and suddenly, you were letting him drag you out of the kitchen. His friends were gathered in the living room with a few other girls, all of whom were trying to decide what game they wanted to play.

You recognized a couple of his friends—Han Jisung and Lee Felix. The two of them were desperately advocating for "Kiss and Blow", waving around their deck of cards, trying to entice an exasperated Yu Karina and Shin Ryujin that this was a good idea.

"Hey guys, this is Yn," Seungmin introduced you to the group, who eagerly accepted you into their cult circle.

Felix patted the empty spot on the floor next to him, and you settled there with Seungmin sitting on your right. "How do you feel about playing Kiss and Blow, Yn?" The blond asked you with wagging eyebrows.

You shrugged, smiling. "Uh sure. I haven't played before, but I've watched a round or two."

Jisung exclaimed in victory, punching the sky. "Yes! It's really simple, Yn; I'll start."

And you watched the card make its way counterclockwise around the circle. Everyone seemed to be keen to keep the card from slipping from their mouths, probably because almost everyone here were friends. Your heart pounded at an increasing rate as the card approached you, but you couldn't tell if it was from nerves, adrenaline, or both.

Felix was next with the card, presenting it to you with giggling eyes. You pressed your lips to the opposite side, sucking it a breath, before removing it from Felix.

You didn't know what possessed you to do it, but your grip and suction slipped, and the card was falling from your mouth. You locked eyes with Seungmin beside you, who's expression was teasing, and his cheeks were pink from anticipation or alcohol or all of the above. Howls of encouragement rallied around the circle of people, some yelling, some singing "Kiss the Girl".

"A punishment's a punishment," you said to him.

Seungmin licked his smiling lips. "I wouldn't use the word punishment." Then he was cupping the back of your head and pulling you to him—his mouth landing on yours to the soundtrack of the raging party around you, but all you could really hear was the rush of blood in your ears, and the feel of Seungmin on your lips.

There was a bright flashing light, like the shutter of a camera. You would later discover that Ryujin had snapped a Polaroid photo of the two of you, and Seungmin would win the rock-paper-scissors match to keep it.

You and Seungmin slipped out from the noise of the party about a half an hour later. The back porch was surprisingly empty, and the two of you settled on the top step, laughing about the charades game that had just ended.

"Okay, but doesn't Hannie remind you of a squirrel?" You asked Seungmin, cheeks hurting from how hard you smiled. "He's so cute and chirpy and all. I could just squish his cheeks."

Seungmin pouted beside you. "Well, what do I remind you of?"

You tilted your head to the side as you considered him, but you already knew the answer. "You're like a puppy, Minnie."

"And puppies are cuter than squirrels though, right?"

Ah, now you knew where this was going. You gently bumped your arm with his. "Of course."

Seungmin linked his arm with yours and pulled you closer to him. He leaned his head onto his knees, eyes reaching yours. "Yn, can I kiss you again?" There seemed to be stars reflected in his irises, and you thought you could see the whole galaxy in the way he looked at you.

You nodded, and he was leaning toward you closer, holding you tighter, as he kissed you under the stars. And maybe it was just you, but there was an itching feeling in the back of your mind that this boy would burn you… but you loved the feeling so much that you would let him.

a/n: now try reading it backwards go! 😼 lol jk it's supposed to give off a different vibe, but u can tell me if it worked or not lmao

skz m.list

permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @justanotherkpopstanlol @liamsholygrail @staysstrays @y3jiishot @jodidann

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[navstuffs]

Angst headcanons where team gets captured and reader makes the hard decision - part 2

Part 1

Pairing: adrian chase x gn!reader

Author's note: per request of @allukanezuko, there is the second part! THIS IS HUGE IDK WHAT HAPPENED TO ME.

Warning: VIOLENCE, SWEARING, BLOOD, TORTURE, ANGST, PLEASE DO NOT READ IF NOT SUITABLE FOR YOU!

You wake up like every other day, have a small meal, and go training since you didn't have a choice. You stop for lunch then go back to training. You only stop later for sleeping. Your ex took you to his base where the rest of his followers are, in an unknown location out of the country

You don't know how long has passed. You don't have any notion of how long you have been kept captive

"You have gone soft. Dating that loser made you softer."

That's what you get to hear every day, on your daily exclusive training from him. Almost every time, you end up on the dirt floor while he spits at you. He despises how soft you have become

You end up losing weight more and more. You try to get yourself some sleep now and then, but every time you close your eyes you see the house on fire

The guilt consumes you, but you don't cry. Not knowing if Adrian is alive, if the rest of the team is alive is worse than any kind of torture your ex puts you through. And it seems he knows, taunting you about the sound of Adrian's arm breaking it, the "fat" guy screaming as the house burned. You hang to a hopeful thought that they are indeed okay, but you hear nothing from them, not even from Amanda Waller. You don't know if she is still sending killers in your ex's direction, or if she can't find him

You pass your days training with the new soldiers and your ex makes sure that only the strongest can survive. you have to kill sometimes kids that barely look over eighteen, that followed your ex vision of a stronger world with stronger people. Fools and innocents as you once were.

They so badly want to belong, so badly want to make your ex, their leader, proud, but you need to survive. You need to survive for the idea that they are alive.

One night, there is a knock on your door and someone with a total black mask and black outfit opens the door. You get up surprised but the person doesn't say anything, motioning for you to follow them.

Your heart beats fast as you decide if you should. It could be a trap, a new test. "Better to follow. I will die if I stay here", you nod and follow the person

You pass by some recruits and none of them looks in your direction. Being considered your ex's favorite recruit and the best killer gives you a sense of some protection in the place

You continue to follow the person until a door where two more experienced agents observe the situation. The person presents them a card that you can't see and the door opens leading to a dense forest, making your insides turn. This person was saving you.

"What the fuck is going on in here?"

Your ex appears behind you, followed by the two men that helped him kidnap you.

Your savior takes you down at the same time a bomb explodes outside the walls of the fortress, prompting a small group to get in. Your savior takes the mask off and reveals it to be Emilia Harcourt. She seems well and you hug her

"Emilia!"

"Not the time!"

She gets up and you see Leota giving her a gun. You want to hug Leota as well, feeling your breakdown coming closer. No, you think, control yourself. For more bastard your ex is, he is right. Emotions will indeed not help at the wrong time

There is huge fighting going on your side. Leota rapidly explains she told Waller she shouldn't let this go unpunished and for some reason, she allowed them to take your ex down. With the help of more agents sent by Waller, they found your ex's hideout.

Your eyes go in the direction of the other agent and your heart gives another stronger jump when you see Vigilante slicing bodies like a butcher. His whole outfit is bloodied and it doesn't seem he cares if they are already dead when he hits them

The rest of the younger soldiers are reluctant to fight. They hide behind the healing lady who doesn't take a step forward.

Your ex is taking Waller's agent like nothing. He is hitting them left and right. Peacemaker tries to get to him but is interrupted fighting the other two from your first mission. Your ex's eyes are sorely on Adrian and you freeze in your space.

"Enjoyed the broken arm?"

"Not as much I am gonna enjoy shoving my sword inside your asshole until it comes out of your mouth."

You move before your mind can think. You get in front of Adrian and your ex stops, his eyes flaming with anger

"You and me. Nobody else. No weapons. If I win, you have to release everyone in here. If you win, I will go with you until whenever you want."

You can hear Adrian plead for you not to do this, but you don't look in his direction. Your ex agrees to take his weapons away and everyone forms a circle around you.

You don't look towards Adrian but Chris looks at you with encouragement, nodding in your direction.

Your ex comes into your direction, his hands closed in fists. He is smiling, knowing fully well you are much weaker than him. But this time, it will be different. It has to be.

He throws you to the floor and you kick him on his belly with your knee. He winces but proceeds to try to hold you down. You can hear Chris and Adrian scream to destroy his nuts.

He tries to hold your legs down with his, but you hit again with your knees harder and he winces, letting your arms go for a second. You get away from his arms and get up. He gets up with you, laughing

"No matter what happens today, you have my mark on me. You are mine."

You scream, running in his direction. Your kick gets blocked, but the other one isn't and you hit his stomach, hearing him groan. You keep hitting with your fists and legs and he doesn't attack again, overwhelmed by your attacks.

Your ex falls down to his knees and you can hear Peacemaker scream NO as you get close to give him a final blow. His face is bloodied but he smiles, grabbing you and tightening his hold. Your chest hurts and you try to get away.

"This is how will die. You are gonna die by my hands and no one can do anything about it."

You breathe rapidly, your consciousness starting to sleep away. He continues to tighten his hold and your whole body hurts. On a desperate thought, your head hits his hard. He looks surprised, but you continue to hit his head with yours until there is blood coming from both of them. You don't realize but you are screaming. All you can see is red and your ex falls into his knees, still holding you but weaker. He eventually lets you go and lets his arm up.

"I give up. You win"

You breathe deep, falling into your knees, looking at your bloodied hands, and thinking that is finally over. You did it. You hear a commotion on top of you and you watch Adrian kick your ex so hard he flies in another direction. Peacemaker ends the hit with a punch to his face.

Your ex falls and doesn't come up. You try to run towards Adrian, opening your arms, passing out, Adrian catching you immediately

When you wake up, your whole body hurts. Your head especially, surrounded by bandages. Adrian is sleeping in a chair, his glasses titled to one side, his outfit still dirty with blood and he is holding your hand. You can see his mask on the floor and some weapons in the room, still dripping blood. It seems he sit down there and no one could take him away

"Adrian?"

He wakes up to the sound of your voice, asking you how you are doing. He doesn't look like blood-thirsty Adrian, just the usual nerd one. Before you can say anything, you feel the tears finally coming down. Adrian asks if you are feeling pain and your tears start getting worse. You are getting choked up and the doors open and the whole team burst through the door, everyone with gun in hands, looking for a threat. Peacemaker and Leota have flowers and balloons on their other hands

"What did you do, Adrian?" asks Leota, coming to your side and nuzzling your shoulder

"I don't know! I don't know if they are in pain or not" exclaims Adrian, frantic "Are you in pain, baby?"

Emilia puts her gun back and announces she will look for a doctor. You finally find your voice to say something, with a weak voice, between your sobbing

"Stay! Please stay!"

Murn and Emilia give each other an understanding look. Soon, they get chairs for everyone and John gets you a cup of water. You don't know how long you have been holding Adrian's hand strongly but he doesn't complain

"I brought you chocolate" John announces, showing your favorite chocolate bar "Adrian helped me with this one"

"Peacemaker and I brought you flowers and balloons" Leota announces and Peacemaker puts the balloons down, near you

"Eagly wanted to be here but he sent you a get well card" Peacemaker gives a card with a tinted paw and a GET WELL SOON. You chuckle between the tears.

Your sobs finally get quieter and Murn offers you a tissue. There is a silence where everyone is staring at you until Emilia speaks.

"Look, we don't need to talk about what happened in there. If you want to talk with us or only Adrian is fine. I don't think he will be enough help anyway"

"Hey!"

"It's okay. Just having everyone here is fine for now. The 11th streets kids"

You turn to Emilia and Clemson, wiping your tears.

"What happened to them?"

"Amanda Waller gave them a choice. Either they continued on that life or she put them in jail, forever. Safe to say, all of them chose the free life. But they are never allowed to go into a soldier's life again. Not to touch a gun. She is keeping a good eye on them. Now, the closer group... your ex is down deep into a prison in the middle of the sea. The other two guys and the healing woman are in federal jail. I think Waller has plans for them."

"Good. I hope he dies in that living hell." Adrian said, hearing an aye captain from Peacemaker.

You felt like a weight was off your chest. Your ex would never hurt anyone you loved again. Or you. You start feeling the tears coming again, as you feel Adrian's hand squeeze yours and you turned towards his worried face

"Are you okay?"

"Yes. Yes. I will be."

[beifongsss]

the boiling rock [zuko]

Pairing: Zuko x reader

Disclaimer!: The reader is Sokka and Katara’s older sister!

Requested?: Yes! By @thegirlwholikestomanythings​: “ Hi! I have a Zuko x reader request if you don't mind. Maybe something like the reader being Katara and Sokka's older sister and Zuko having a big crush on her after he joins in S3?”

Summary: Sokka goes to break Hakoda out of The Boiling Rock and is shocked to find you there as well. He’s even more shocked when he figures out that Zuko’s a simp for you.

this is based off of the boiling rock episodes but there are a few changed made! there’s also like a pov change halfway i’m sorry. TIS A LONG ONE!!

.masterlist.

~

When Zuko defeated Combustion Man, Aang didn’t let him join the group until he gained approval from all of his friends.

“Toph, you're the one that Zuko burned. What do you think?”

The blind earthbender smirked, a sinister look on her face as she pounded her fist into her palm. “Go ahead and let him join. It'll give me plenty of time to get back at him for burning my feet.”

Satisfied with her answer, Aang turned to the Water Tribe boy. “Sokka?”

“Hey, all I want is to defeat the Fire Lord. If you think this is the way to do it, then, I'm all for it,” he said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the wall near him.

“Katara?” Aang asked uncertainly, noticing the stony look on the Water Tribe girl’s face.

“I'll go along with whatever you think is right,” she replied, glaring at Zuko.

“Great!” Aang said, ignoring Katara’s reaction. “Then that’s settled. Welcome to the group Zuko!”

Zuko paused slightly, looking around as he noticed the absence of the other Water Tribe girl he had always seen with the Gaang.

“Not that I’m complaining,” the prince said, a questioning look in his eyes. “But isn’t there someone else you should be asking? Where’s the other Water Tribe girl?”

The group went silent at Zuko’s words as Katara’s face hardened and Sokka looked away, a sad expression making it’s way onto his face.

“She’s gone,” Sokka said roughly as he began to storm off.

Katara reached out for his arm, grabbing onto him as he passed her. “Sokka, it wasn’t your fault.”

“Not my fault?” Sokka roared, stray tears escaping his eyes as he faced Katara. “It was my invasion plan Katara! I should’ve taken the fall. Not her!”

He shrugged her hand off before walking off deeper into the Air Temple. Katara sent Zuko another glare before hurrying after her brother, leaving him alone with Aang and Toph. Zuko glanced at Aang uneasily, not wanting to ask about what had happened. With a sigh, Aang sat down looking at Zuko expectantly.

The prince sat down across from Aang as Toph sat to his left, the usually loud-mouthed girl abnormally quiet.

“The other Water Tribe girl that would travel with us is (Y/N),” Aang explained quietly. “She’s Sokka and Katara’s older sister.”

Zuko nodded in response before speaking. “W-What happened to her?”

“She got captured by the Fire Nation on the Day of Black Sun,” Aang replied, looking down at his lap. “You know about the invasion right?”

Zuko nodded once more.

“Well it was Sokka’s invasion plan,” Aang continued. Zuko’s eyebrows rose up in surprise, going unnoticed by Aang. “He came up with it and (Y/N) and Hakoda, that’s their dad, fine tuned it. They thought of everything that could possibly go wrong and when the day came, Sokka was the one leading it.”

Aang’s face suddenly turned into one full of guilt. “I-It was actually my fault that she got captured. If I hadn’t gotten distracted by Azula, we could’ve gotten away before the eclipse was over. Instead, they caught up to us before we could get back to the beach. Hakoda told us all to leave on Appa and to take the youngest members of the group but (Y/N) didn’t fit because we had Teo, Haru, and The Duke with us. So she decided to stay behind and take the blame for the invasion so that they wouldn’t go out and look for us. She said that they’d believe her because she was traveling with the Avatar and because she was the daughter of the Chief of the Southern Water Tribe and she had a reason to want to attack the Fire Nation.”

Aang couldn’t stop the tear that slipped out. “I guess she was right because we weren’t followed after we escaped.”

“C’mon Twinkletoes,” Toph said, leaning back on her hands. “(Y/N) knew what she was getting into. She’s not dumb. She’s strong, smart, and patient. In fact, I’m willing to bet she’s making those Fire Nation guard’s lives hell.”

Zuko observed Toph as she spoke about the missing Water Tribe girl. “How are you so sure?”

“Please,” Toph scoffed, cracking her knuckles. “She’s the only idiot here that can beat me in a fight. She’ll be fine.”

“Oh,” Zuko said, slightly surprised. “Is she a waterbender too?”

“Nope,” Toph said. “That’s how I know she’s okay. She can beat me in a fight, and I’m the greatest earthbender in the world! I invented metalbending.”

Zuko’s eyebrows shot up in surprise at Toph’s words. “She beat you without any bending?”

“She did,” Sokka’s voice rang out. The group (except Toph) turned around to find Sokka walking towards them. “Which is why we needed her here, not in prison. She shouldn’t be paying for my mistakes.”

Without another word Sokka climbed onto Appa, shooting Aang a look when the Air Nomad shot him a worried glance. “Don’t worry Aang. I’m just gonna clear my head. Yip yip.”

The conversation ended with Sokka’s departure and silently, Aang showed Zuko to his room.

~

“Hey, can I talk to you for a second?” Sokka asked, catching Zuko’s attention as he handed him a cup of tea. Zuko set down the tea and followed Sokka to where he was standing, softly petting Appa when he opened his eyes to look at them.

“So, what’s up?” Zuko asked, looking back over at the group before focusing on Sokka.

“If someone was captured by the Fire Nation, where would they be taken?” the Water Tribe boy asked, trying to look nonchalant. At Zuko’s suspicious look, he spoke again. “When the invasion plan failed, some of our troops were taken. I just want to know where they might be.”

“We both know this is about your sister, Sokka,” Zuko replied. “I can’t tell you.”

“What? Why not?” Sokka asked, mildly irritated. 

“Trust me,” Zuko said, turning to leave. “Knowing will just make you feel worse.”

“It’s not just about (Y/N)!” Sokka hissed, causing Zuko to stop in his tracks. “It’s my dad. He was captured too. I need to know what I put them through.”

“It’s not good Sokka,” the prince replied, not meeting his eyes.

“Please.”

Sighing deeply, Zuko gave in. “My guess is, they were taken to The Boiling Rock.”

“What’s that?”

“The highest security prison in the Fire Nation,” Zuko ignored Sokka’s horrified look. “It's on an island in the middle of a boiling lake. It's inescapable.”

“So,” Sokka said, trying to appear indifferent. “Where is this place?”

“Why do you need to know?” Zuko asked, eyes narrowing. “What are you planning?”

“Nothing!” Sokka tried reassuring the prince. “Boy, you’re so paranoid.”

Zuko rolled his eyes before replying. “It's in the middle of a volcano between here and the Fire Nation. You guys actually flew right past it on your way here.”

“Thanks Zuko,” Sokka said before letting out a very fake yawn as he stretched. “Just knowing makes me feel better.”

“Sure it does,” Zuko scoffed, watching the Water Tribe boy walk away. Noticing that everyone was getting ready to go to bed, he stealthily climbed up onto Appa’s saddle, gently shushing the sky bison when he once again opened his eyes.

~

At this moment, Zuko sort of regretted joining Sokka on his journey. After having successfully convinced him to take his war balloon instead of Appa, the two boys found themselves existing in awkward silence.

“Pretty clouds,” Sokka spoke first, slightly startling Zuko.

“Yeah...fluffy,” the Fire Nation prince replied before focusing on the fire again. Sokka began whistling casually, drawing Zuko’s attention. “What?”

“What?” Sokka asked, the awkwardness between the two boys palpable. “Oh, I didn't say anything. You know, a friend of mine actually designed these war balloons.”

“No kidding,” Zuko said with slight surprise.

“Yep. A balloon...but for war,” came the other boy’s reply.

“If there's one thing my dad's good at, it's war.”

“Yeah, it seems to run in the family.”

“Hey, hold on,” Zuko said, slightly offended. “Not everyone in my family is like that.”

“I know, I know,” Sokka replied, hands raised in defense. “You’ve changed.”

“I meant my uncle. He was more of a father to me. And I really let him down.”

“I think your uncle would be proud of you,” Sokka said, looking at Zuko intently. “Leaving your home to come help us? That's hard.”

“It wasn’t that hard.”

“Really?” Sokka asked in disbelief. “You didn't leave behind anyone you cared about?”

“Well I did have a girlfriend,” Zuko replied, smiling slightly. “Mai.”

“That gloomy girl who sighs a lot?” Sokka asked, trying to hold back his smile.

“Yeah. Everyone in the Fire Nation thinks I'm a traitor. I couldn't drag her into it,” Zuko explained before hesitating slightly. “Besides, I didn’t truly like her. Trust me, I know that sounds bad. When we were kids we liked each other, but we’re not kids anymore and we’ve both changed and things just weren’t working out.”

Sokka nodded in understanding before crossing his arms. “My first girlfriend turned into the moon.”

Zuko paused for a few seconds, looking up at the moon and wondering if Sokka was being serious before turning to him. “That’s rough buddy.”

Silence ensued again, the scene almost relaxing if it weren’t for the fact that the two of them were heading for the most high-security prison in the Fire Nation.

“So,” Zuko broke the silence, looking at Sokka uncertainly. “What happens if we get there and (Y/N) isn’t there?

The question caught Sokka off guard, causing him to scowl. “She will be.”

“But,” Zuko pressed, trying to make the boy understand. “What if she isn’t?

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” Sokka replied, crossing his arms and looking away as he tried not to think about Zuko’s words.

“Why don’t you just wait until after Aang defeats my father to set everyone free?” Zuko asked softly. “You’d have a much better chance then.”

“You just don’t get it!” Sokka yelled, looking back at Zuko. “See you and your sister might not get along very well but (Y/N) is the most important person in my life. She was the one who took care of me and Katara after our mom died. She was the one who basically led our tribe after the men went off to fight. She always knew what to say and what to do. We need her Zuko. I need her, Katara needs her, Aang definitely needs her, heck even Toph needs her!”

Zuko stayed silent as he focused on the fire, giving Sokka a few minutes to calm down.

“You’re right Sokka,” he finally said. “I don’t get along with Azula. We’ll find her.”

Sokka didn’t reply, instead choosing to look up at the moon, hoping that he had made the right choice.

~

Soon enough, they had reached The Boiling Rock. Zuko followed after Sokka, a bit disgruntled at the fact that his war balloon had been destroyed. They had somehow managed to get guard uniforms and sneak into the prison, a feat Zuko found impressive considering that Sokka didn’t have a fully thought-out plan.

“I hope these disguises work,” Zuko hissed, shoving Sokka softly with his shoulder.

“We just need to lay low and find (Y/N) and my dad as soon as possible,” Sokka quietly replied, rubbing his shoulder. “Ow!”

“Guards!” another guard ran past Sokka and Zuko, causing them to flinch. “There’s a scuffle in the yard. Come on!”

The two boys exchanged looks before running after the guard, eventually coming to an open space where a guard was harassing a prisoner. The rest of the guards were trying to keep the other prisoners away from the confrontation. Sokka subtly tilted his head, motioning for Zuko to join the other guards. They split up slightly, trying to keep the crowd in control.

“I didn’t do anything,” the prisoner in the middle of the platform stated, walking away from the guard. “I’m going back to my cell.”

“Stop right there Chit Sang,” the guard said, sending a fire whip towards him. “I’ve had it with your unruly behavior.”

One of the prisoners Zuko was trying to hold back began to slip past him and he reached out to grab them. His eyes widened when he made eye contact with the girl, who then promptly proceeded to shove him off of her and onto the ground. Zuko stared at the girl, his heart speeding up slightly and his stomach lurching as she shot him a glare and marched right up to the guard who had created the fire whip.

“Leave him alone!” she growled, stepping in front of Chit Sang. The guard simply laughed before stepping forwards.

“What are you gonna do Water Tribe scum?”

Zuko flinched as Sokka swatted him, tilting his head towards the girl. “That’s her! That’s (Y/N)!”

Sokka grasped Zuko’s arm tightly, knowing that he couldn’t jump to his sister’s defense. The two of them watched in anticipation as the guard shot out a blast of fire, aiming it at you. Zuko’s eyes widened at the sight. You weren’t a bender, you were going to get burned.

His jaw dropped as you gracefully slid underneath the blast before coming up and swatting the guard’s hand away. When the guard tried to aim at you again, you swept your leg in a graceful arc, knocking him down. You were amazing.

“Cuff her!” the guard barked, embarrassment clear on his face as all the other prisoners cheered. Two of the other guards grabbed you roughly, cuffing your hands behind your back and shoving you roughly in front of the guard you had knocked down.

“You think you’re tough, don’t you?” the guard asked. You didn’t look at him.

“Look at me when I speak to you!” the guard screamed. The yard went silent as everyone waited to see what you would do. Slowly, you lifted your head and met the guard’s eyes. His face held a smug expression, which was soon wiped off when you leaned forward and spit in his face.

The yard went wild again, the guards struggling to keep the prisoners under control. The bully guard lunged forwards, gripping your face tightly in his hand. He stared you down for a few seconds before tossing you to the ground. Scowling, he turned to Sokka and Zuko, who seemed to be the only guards not busy at the moment. “You two! Take her to her cell.”

Sokka picked you up and Zuko led them inside, stealing glances at you as you walked. At one point Sokka caught his gaze, giving him a confused look before his eyes widened in realization. He looked between you and Zuko before glaring at the prince and shaking his head furiously. Zuko avoided his gaze after that. They found your cell quickly enough and Sokka softly pushed you in before stepping inside and pulling Zuko with him.

He took off your cuffs easily enough and you stepped away from him, rubbing your wrists gently.

“What do you want?” you snarled, eyes shifting from one guard to another.

“(Y/N)!” one of them cried out, moving towards you. You sidestepped quickly, grabbing his arm and shoving him up against the wall. He groaned in pain as you pulled his arm back.

“What do you want?” you hissed, not taking your eyes off of the other guard.

“(Y/N/N),” the one you were holding squeaked. “It’s me!”

Your eyes widened at the voice and you stepped back, still keeping your hand on the guard’s arm. “Sokka?”

Sokka used his free hand to take off his helmet, a large grin on his face as he turned to look at you. “Yes! It’s m-”

His words were cut off when you yanked on his arm, pulling him close to you as you wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug. Sokka melted into the hug, wrapping his arms around you tightly as he held tears back.

“Spirits,” you whispered, pulling back and looking at your baby brother. “Sokka what are you doing here? How did you get here?”

“Uh, we took my war balloon,” the other guard replied. You froze slightly at the familiar voice, turning to find Prince Zuko standing there, waving awkwardly.

“You,” you snarled, stomping up to the prince and pushing him up against the wall. You held your forearm against his throat, staring him down. Zuko didn’t do anything in return, a dazed smile on his face as he stared back at you.

“(Y/N) what are you doing?” Sokka yelped, placing a hand on your shoulder. You looked away from Zuko, glancing at your brother in disbelief.

“What do you mean? Have you forgotten that he’s tracked us all over the world? Or that he’s tried to kill us? Multiple times!” you glanced at Zuko again, noticing that he was still smiling. “Why are you smiling at me? Sokka, why is he smiling at me?”

Sokka snorted softly, the scene in front of him reminding him of the first time Aang had met him and Katara. Shooting a tired look at Zuko, he gently pulled you away from the scarred prince. “I don’t know why he’s smiling at you but I do know that he’s part of the team now, so lay off okay?”

You looked at him in disbelief before whirling around and facing Sokka. “Alright but that still doesn’t explain why you’re here.”

“We’re here to break you out?” Sokka said, rubbing the back of his neck as he turned his gaze to the floor.

“Seriously?” you hissed, stepping closer to him and causing him to stumble back. “This couldn’t have waited until after Aang defeated Ozai?”

“I told you so,” Zuko mumbled, shooting a pointed look at Sokka.

“Stay out of this,” you whisper-yelled, pushing him back up against the wall with one hand. “You have to leave. Both of you.“

“Well you see,” Sokka said, chuckling slightly as he met your gaze. “We can’t exactly do that.”

“Yes you can,” you replied, grabbing Sokka and proceeding to push the two boys towards the door. “Just get back on your little war balloon and leave.”

Zuko and Sokka exchanged nervous glances at the mention of the war balloon, causing you to narrow your eyes at them.

“Don’t say it.”

“It popped!” Sokka squealed, bouncing away from you as he noticed your expression. “But we’ll get out of here, and you’re coming with us.”

You couldn’t help but facepalm at your brother’s words.

~

The guards had only released you from your cell when it was your turn to do the cleaning. You hadn’t heard from Sokka since he had left you, and you were worried that he had gotten caught. You were so distracted by your thoughts that you didn’t notice the other prisoner who was mopping, resulting in you bumping into them and falling down.

“I’m sorry,” the other prisoner said, extending a hand to help you up. You glanced up, making eye contact with Zuko. Your eyes widened almost comically and you grabbed his hand, simultaneously pulling yourself up and pulling him closer to you.

“Where is my brother?” you asked as you leaned in close, panic in your voice as you whispered in his ear. Zuko tried to ignore the blush on his cheeks as your close proximity, focusing on your question.

“He’s fine,” he whispered back. “It was just me who got caught.”

You let his hand go, stepping back and nodding subtly before going back to mopping. Zuko stayed close to you, pretending to be focused on his mopping as he stole glances at you. Feeling his gaze, you looked up and arched an eyebrow as you made eye contact. The prince flushed when he realized he had been caught, looking back down before speaking.

“I-I never introduced myself,” he spoke softly. “I’m Zuko.”

“I know,” you replied flatly, walking further away from him. Zuko stood awkwardly for a moment before inching closer to you again.

“So you’re (Y/N),” he spoke again. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

You snorted at his words, your eyes not leaving the ground. “Yeah I’m sure it is.”

“You’re a really good fighter,” Zuko continued, still trying to make conversation. “Even back when I was still hunting the Avatar you were the one that I was most worried about holding off.”

“Good to know,” you said drily, finally looking up at Zuko. “Look, Sokka may trust you but I don’t, okay? First of all, you haven’t really done anything but cause trouble for us. Second of all, you actually brought my brother here. I appreciate the sentiment but I’m not exactly thrilled at the idea of my baby brother breaking into a Fire Nation prison.”

Zuko swallowed harshly, looking away. “I’m sorry. But he was really adamant about rescuing you and your dad and-”

“Wait,” you interrupted Zuko. “I’m the only Water Tribe member here. My dad is still being held somewhere in the Fire Nation capital.”

Zuko’s eyes widened briefly before he composed himself. “Oh. Alright then I guess that means we can leave as soon as Sokka comes back to meet us.”

The two of you continued to mop in silence before someone suddenly grabbed your upper arm, causing you to stiffen and causing Zuko to get into a defensive stance.

“Calm down, it’s just me.”

“You really have to stop doing that Sokka,” you hissed, yanking your arm away from him. “Zuko told me about why you’re here. I hope you know we can leave now. Dad isn’t here.”

Sokka’s face fell briefly before he forced a smile onto his face. “He may not be but guess who is? Suki! Why didn’t you tell me she was here (Y/N)?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” you whispered. “Maybe because I was too busy freaking out about the fact that my kid brother and the Fire Nation prince broke into prison and don’t have a way to get out!”

“Shh!” Sokka hissed, putting his hand over your mouth. “Be quiet! And I’m not your ‘kid brother’, you’re only a year older than I am.”

Zuko stayed quiet as the two of you stared each other down before Sokka let out a yelp and took his hand off your mouth. “Did you just lick me?”

You didn’t reply, a smirk on your face as you crossed your arms. Zuko stifled a laugh at the scene in front of him, coughing quietly when you shot a look at him. The three of you stood still as a new voice interrupted.

“So, what’s the plan?” Suki stood near you, hiding in the shadows that the staircase provided. You exchanged a glance with Sokka, nodding in encouragement.

“So, listen, I think I have an escape plan,” Sokka began, a little nervous at being in charge of the escape plan. “I checked out the coolers again, and the point of them is to keep firebenders contained, right?”

“Yeah,” Zuko replied, unsure as to where this was going. 

“So, they're completely insulated and sealed to keep the cold in. Well, to keep the cold in, it also has to keep the heat out, right?”

Zuko and Suki exchanged confused looks before looking over at you, only to see you smiling widely as you caught on.

“Just get to the point Sokka,” Suki said, glancing around nervously.

“It's a perfect boat for getting through the boiling water!” you said, eyes sparkling as you looked at Sokka proudly. Despite the situation, Zuko found himself smiling at the sight of your smile.

“Sokka,” you said, leaning in close to your brother while keeping your eyes on Zuko. “He’s doing it again.”

Sokka scowled and smacked Zuko’s head, causing the boy to straighten up and ignore Suki’s smirk. “The cooler as a boat? Are you sure?”

“I’m telling you, it’ll work,” Sokka said, giving them each a serious glance. “I walked around the perimeter. There's a blind spot between two guard towers. It's the perfect launching point. I already tested it out. We'll roll the cooler into the water and just float with the current. It'll take us straight across. As long as we don't make a sound, no one will notice. And bing-bang-boom, we're home free.”

“But how are you going to get the cooler out?” Suki asked, a worried frown on her face.

“Yeah. How are you gonna get the cooler out?”

The four of you turned as Chit Sang landed next to you, causing Sokka and Zuko to stutter as they tried to tell Chit Sang that they weren’t planning anything. You rolled your eyes, stepping closer to Chit Sang before speaking. “That’s easy, isn’t it? We just need to get a firebender into the cooler.”

Sokka and Zuko gaped at you, shocked that you had given them away.

“Calm down,” you scoffed, patting Chit Sang’s back. “Chit Sang and I go way back. He’s the one who made all the other firebenders leave me alone.”

Chit Sang nodded before turning back to the group. “Look I won’t tell the warden about your plan if you let me come along.”

Sokka stared at you intently, the two of you having a silent conversation before turning back to the group. “Fine! But we need to get someone into the cooler.”

Sokka handed Zuko a wrench. “Here. You’re going to unbolt the cooler, from the inside.”

Zuko looked back at Sokka, confused. “How am I going to get in there?”

You grinned widely, patting Zuko’s chest as you walked past him. “I got this. Follow my lead.”

You picked up your mop, motioning for Zuko to do the same. You began mopping, casually walking around as you kept Zuko in your periphery. The prince didn’t dare look at you so he was caught by surprise when you bumped into him from behind.

“Hey!” you snapped, turning around and glaring at him. “Watch where you’re going.”

Zuko froze for a split second before realizing this was your plan. “You’re the one who bumped into me. How about you watch where you’re going?”

A smile played at the corner of your lips as you stared each other down. Zuko noticed and felt his cheeks grow warm as he tried to hold back a smile of his own. The two of you stood there for a few seconds, staring at each other until Sokka coughed loudly.

Tearing your eyes away from the prince, you lunged at him. He easily dodged your swing before throwing a halfhearted punch back at you. You rolled your eyes as you kicked at him, losing your balance slightly as he swatted your leg away. You recovered quickly and threw another punch, a soft gasp leaving your mouth when he grasped your wrist and twirled you around, your back pressed against his chest as his arm held you tightly in place.

You struggled for a moment, sighing in defeat when you realized just how strong he was. You tilted your head back slightly, your lips brushing against his ear as you whispered into it. “You have to firebend at me Zuko.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he mumbled back, causing you to roll your eyes again.

“I’m a big girl. I can handle myself,” you replied. With a grunt, you elbowed him in the stomach. He let out a soft ‘oof’ and you took that chance to break out of his hold. You dropped down and spun, your leg outstretched as you tried to knock him down. He jumped over your leg easily before shooting out a blast of fire at you. He held his breath for a second, sighing in relief as he noticed you roll out of the way.

“No firebending!” a guard shouted, roughly grabbing Zuko from behind. You sent him a soft smile, receiving a smirk in return. As he was led away, Suki came up to you, a big smile on her face.

“So,” she said, her tone teasing. “What was that?”

“Yeah (Y/N),” Sokka said, crossing his arms as he came up to you. “What was that?”

You rolled your eyes before walking past the two of them. “It was a fight.”

“That’s not what it looked like from my point of view,” Suki called out after you, causing Sokka to send a glare at her. You simply chuckled at her words.

~

“(Y/N)?”

You stood up from the floor of your cell, looking at Sokka as he stood outside your cell. “Yeah?”

“It’s time.”

Sokka opened your cell and threw you a guard’s uniform before quickly closing the door and allowing you to change. When you were done, you knocked on the door three times, fixing your helmet as you waited for him to open the door.

Together, the two of you made your way towards the cooler, trying to avoid any guards on your way.

You opened the door to the cooler, a small frown making its way onto your face when you noticed that Zuko was shivering.

“I can take you back to your cell if you’ve learned your lesson,” Sokka said, looking way too smug. You rolled our eyes and focused on Zuko as he looked up at the two of you. His eyes met yours as he let out a breath of fire, his shivering stopping completely. He sent you a cocky smirk and you ignored the flopping you felt in your stomach at the sight of it. (A/N: y’all know what smirk i’m talkin bout)

“Yes I have,” he breathed, showing you both all the bolts and screws he had removed. “Completely.”

“I got Suki and Chit Sang out of their cells a few minutes ago,” Sokka whispered. “They'll be waiting for us at the shore.”

“Someone’s coming!” you whisper yelled, letting out a small yelp when you were pulled into the cooler. The three of you barely fit into the cooler but that didn’t make it any less cold. Even though you had grown up in the South Pole, you found yourself shivering at the temperature, your breath coming out in icy clouds.

Zuko glanced down at you, a frown appearing on his face as he noticed you shivering. He hesitantly wrapped his arms around you, bringing you in close as your expression changed into a bewildered one. You opened your mouth to say something, but quickly shut it when you realized just how warm he was. Sokka, unfortunately, didn’t stay quiet at the scene playing out in front of him.

“What do you think you’re doing?” he screeched quietly, trying to pry the two of you apart. You quickly pushed him away.

“Sokka, shut up,” you mumbled as you wrapped your arms around Zuko, your teeth still chattering. “He’s warm and I’m freezing.”

Sokka’s jaw dropped as you casually buried your face into Zuko’s chest, a content sigh escaping you as you got warmer by the second. Sokka stayed quiet as the voices outside got closer, instead miming a throat slitting motion as he stared Zuko down, causing the prince to swallow harshly.

“...Yeah. new arrivals coming in at dawn,” a male voice sounded, catching your attention.

“Anybody interesting?” a female voice asked in reply.

“Nah, just the usual. Some robbers, a couple traitors, some war prisoners,” you and Sokka exchanged a disbelieving look.  “Though I did hear there might be a pirate.”

“No fooling!”

The voices faded as they walked away and you all took that chance to leave the cooler.

“War prisoners,” Zuko stated, his eyes not leaving Sokka’s. “Could be your father.”

“I know.”

“Well, what should we do?” Zuko asked. “Are we going ahead with the plan or are we waiting another night?”

“I don't know!” Sokka cried out, looking distraught. “Is it right for me to risk Suki and (Y/N)’s freedom, all of our freedom, on the slim chance that my dad is gonna show up?”

You stayed quiet, not knowing what to say.

“It’s your call Sokka,” Zuko finally said, trying to let the other boy know he was there for him.

Sokka thought about it for a moment, eyes focused on the ground. After a few seconds he looked up and scowled, crossing his arms as he glared at you. “You can let go of him now (Y/N).”

A bright blush erupted on your cheeks as you looked at Zuko, an embarrassed expression spreading across your face as you realized you were still holding onto each other. You stepped away from him quickly, clearing your throat as you did so.

~

The three of you had somehow managed to get the cooler down to the shore, not that it mattered considering the fact that Chit Sang had just taken your only means of escape. It wasn’t his fault really; it was you and Sokka who had been extremely hesitant to leave, not wanting to risk the chance of your dad being on the gondola the next morning.

Suki and Zuko had stayed behind with you, the four of you waiting in the blind spot for the gondola to arrive. It had almost been light out when alarms were set off, causing all of you to whip your heads to where the cooler had been floating off.

“The plan failed!” Sokka said sadly. “They got caught.”

“I guess it’s a good thing we didn’t go along with them huh?” you said, earning a dull look from your brother.

“The gondola's moving,” Sokka said suddenly, grasping your hand. “This is it. If my dad's not there, we've risked everything for nothing.”

“We had to,” you whispered back, squeezing his hand. The four of you now stood in the yard as you waited in anticipation, looking up as the gondola doors opened.

“Is that him?” Zuko asked as the first prisoner got out.

“My dad doesn’t have a nose ring!” both you and Sokka exclaimed, looking at the prince weirdly. More men came off the gondola, both you and Sokka shaking with anxiety as you kept an eye out for Hakoda.

“Where is he?” Sokka asked as the last man stepped off. “Is that it? That can’t be it.”

“I’m sorry,” Suki whispered, rubbing both of your backs.

“Hey you!” the guard called out, drawing your attention. “Get off the gondola.”

You waited with bated breath for the last person to emerge, your hand tightening around Sokka’s and causing him to wince. Your eyes widened as you watched the final prisoner get off, dark jaw-length hair surrounding a face that held tired blue eyes. You immediately turned to Sokka, tears threatening to spill.

“Sokka,” you whispered. “It’s dad.”

~

You had been pacing back and forth worriedly ever since Sokka had gone to join the other guards and quite frankly, both Suki and Zuko were tired of it.

“Please just stand still (Y/N),” Suki said, gently reaching out and grabbing you. “If something was wrong, we would’ve heard it already. Your brother isn’t exactly the quietest.”

You nodded in agreement and sat down, nervously biting your lip as you waited for Sokka to return. You barely flinched as Zuko sat next to you, Suki giving him a knowing glance as she wandered off slowly.

“Look,” he began, staring straight ahead. “I know you don’t like me, but I need to tell you this okay? As much as you can’t help but worry, you shouldn’t. Sokka’s smart and he knows what he’s doing...sort of.”

He chuckled at the halfhearted glare you directed at him. “I’m kidding. But really, Sokka’s smart and brave and he was so set on coming up here and breaking you out and I know he’s going to do it because he has heart. Plus he has you helping him out. So stop worrying so much okay? Also, never repeat any of what I just said to him”

You snorted at Zuko’s words before bumping his shoulder with your. “Thanks Zuko. You know what? Maybe you’re not as bad as I thought.”

The prince’s eyes widened in shock and he smiled down at you, blushing slightly when you smiled back. Your moment was ruined when Sokka came sprinting back, causing Suki to join you as well.

“(Y/N), c’mon! I found him,” Sokka exclaimed. Without another word, he grabbed your arm and dragged you away from the group. A wide smile was on his face and you felt yourself smile as well when you came to a stop in front of a cell.

Sokka slid the door open, looking around before ducking inside and draging you with him. “Thank goodness you’re okay!”

“Oh you’ll see just how ‘okay’ I am,” Hakoda replied, swinging at what he believed to be a guard. You stepped in front of Sokka before pushing Hakoda’s arm out of the way, ducking under it and pushing him softly before pulling Sokka out of the way.

Hakoda’s eyes widened at the familiar movements,searching the faces of the two guards standing before him. “Sokka? (Y/N)?”

"Dad!” you cried out in unison with Sokka, the two of you removing your masks as you smiled at Hakoda. His eyes filled with tears as he brought you into a hug and you couldn’t help but let a few tears slip as well.

“Where’s Katara? Is she okay?”

“She’s fine dad,” you said, tightening your hold on Hakoda. “She’s not here.”

“Where’s Bato?” Sokka asked, pulling away. “Where’s everyone else from the invasion?”

“The others are being held at a prison near the Fire Nation palace,” Hakoda replied. “They sent me here because I kept being difficult after they singled (Y/N) out as the leader and sent her here. But before I left, I met some young women who said they knew you. The...Oshinama Fighters? ”

“You mean the Kyoshi Warriors?” you asked.

“That’s right.”

“Their leader Suki is here,” Sokka said, a blush visible on his face. “She’s gonna escape with us too!”

“Good. We'll need all the help we can get.”

“And you know Prince Zuko?” Sokka asked, getting excited at the thought of finally leaving.

“The son of the Fire Lord?” Hakoda asked hesitantly. “I don't know him, but I know of him.”

"Well he’s here too!” Sokka exclaimed.

“That sounds like a major problem,” Hakoda replied, crossing his arms as his face hardened.

“Actually,” Sokka said, smiling nervously. “He’s on our side now.”

Hakoda shot him a disbelieving look, causing you to step in.

“I had the same reaction dad,” you said, putting a hand on Hakoda’s shoulder. “But he really has changed. He came here with Soka to break me out. He’s been a big help.”

Hakoda’s face softened at your words. You had always been a good judge of character, so if you approved of the prince, then he did too. “So, do you have a plan?”

“We had one,” Sokka said, looking down sadly. “But some of the other prisoners got involved and ruined it. I dunno if there's another way off this island.”

“Sokka, there's no prison in the world that can hold three Water Tribe geniuses.”

“Then I guess we’d better find two more to help me plan something,” you teased, making Hakoda laugh and earning a dull look from Sokka.

~

You sprinted towards the yard, having been distracted by another guard for a few minutes before all the prisoners had been let out. When you reached your dad, Suki, and Sokka, you were surprised to see Chit Sang speaking with them.

“Hey you! You're lucky I didn't rat you out,” Chit Sang said, staring Sokka down. “But my generosity comes with a price. I know you're planning another escape attempt, and I want in.”

You nodded at Sokka, telling him to go along with it. He sighed softly before facing Chit Sang. “Actually, we're trying to escape right now, but we need a riot. You wouldn't happen to know how to start one, would you?”

“You seriously couldn’t start a prison riot?” you asked in disbelief, looking at the three of them in disappointment. “C’mon Chit Sang, let’s show them how it’s done.”

The two of you stepped forwards, Chit Sang picking up another prisoner as you strutted up to one of them.

“Hey everybody!” you yelled, the yard going quiet as you spoke. Without hesitation, you punched the prisoner closest to you. “Riot!”

The yard exploded into chaos as people began fighting and throwing stuff around. You quickly fought off the prisoner that you had punched before returning to your friends.

“Impressive,” Hakoda said, looking around at all the chaos.

You turned and swung as you felt someone bump into you, the person letting out a loud grunt as your fist met their face. Your jaw dropped as your eyes met piercing gold ones, your hands coming up to your face in slight horror as you realized that you had just punched Zuko.

“Yep,” he said, clutching his face. “I probably deserved that after everything I’ve done to you.”

“I’m so sorry,” you choked out in between giggles, earning a smile from the prince.

“Zuko! Good, we’re all here,” Sokka said, drawing you all into a huddle. “Now all we need to do is grab the warden, and get to the gondolas!”

“And how do we do that?” Zuko asked.

Sokka hesitated for a few seconds. “I’m not sure.”

Zuko groaned, throwing his hands up in frustration. “I thought you thought this through!”

“I thought you told me it's okay not to think everything through”

“Maybe not everything, but this is kind of important!” Zuko cried out.

“Hey fella,” Chit Sang interrupted, tapping Zuko’s shoulder before pointing at you. “I think your girlfriend’s taking care of it.”

“You’re dating my daughter?” Hakoda asked, glaring at Zuko.

“W-What? No!” Zuko cried out, slightly fearful of the Water Tribe Chief.

“Damn right you’re not,“ Sokka said, crossing his arms before Chit Sang spun him around.

“Your girlfriend too buddy.”

All four males went silent as they observed both you and Suki. You swiftly made your way up the tower, effortlessly taking guards down as you inched towards the warden. Suki took a stance at the base of the tower, fighting off any other guards who attempted to rush to the warden’s rescue. She was a truly impressive sight, her training as a Kyoshi Warrior shining through as she took down every guard that came at her effortlessly. Sokka stood a few yards away, awestruck at the sight in front of him.

Meanwhile, you had successfully made your way up to the top of the tower. You made quick work of the remaining guards before finally facing the warden.

“You wouldn’t dare,” he snarled, getting into a defensive position.

“Watch me,” you quipped, lunging at him. You avoided his punch, grabbing his wrist and spinning him around before shoving him up against the railing. You grabbed his sash, tying his hands before knocking him down and making sure he was tied securely before smiling over at your dad. “You’re my prisoner now warden.”

Down in the yard, Hakoda, Zuko, and Chit Sang all stared at you in awe, Sokka still focused on Suki.

“That’s my girl,” Hakoda stated, a proud look on his face as he looked up at you.

“Do you think she’d want to be my girl?” Zuko muttered dazedly, unintentionally speaking louder than he meant to. When he realized what he had said, he looked up in embarrassment, being met with an amused glance from Chit Sang, a harsh scowl from Hakoda, and a sharp slap from Sokka.

“Shut up!” Sokka hissed before grabbing Zuko’s arm and rushing to join you and Suki.

You all ran to the gondola, making sure that the warden was still tied up as you dragged him with you.

���We’re almost there!” Suki cried out.

“Spoke too soon,” you groaned as a group of guards came across your path, immediately sending two blasts of fire at you. You yelped as Zuko pulled you out of the way before stepping in front of you and dissipating the blasts. He sent a series of blasts back at them before grabbing the warden from you.

“Back off! We've got the warden!“ he shouted, successfully stopping the guards. When they didn’t make any movements he grabbed your hand and tugged you along. “Let's go”

Suki was the first to make it to the gondola, holding the door open for everyone else. “Everyone in!”

You all clambered on and you glanced around, realizing that someone was missing.

“Zuko!” you yelled, looking back at the prince. He started the gondola and you felt yourself panic as the guards closed in on him. “What are you doing? Hurry up!”

“I’m making it so that they can’t stop us!” With a few kicks, Zuko managed to break the lever that controlled the gondola before sprinting towards you. You leaned out of the door slightly, watching him in anticipation.

“C’mon Zuko,” you whispered to yourself, biting your lip as the gondola left the platform, now hanging freely. Zuko sped up and jumped, his feet landing on the edge of the gondola. He wobbled for a bit before you grasped his arm, fully pulling him into the gondola and into your arms. Zuko looked at you in confusion before wrapping his arms around you as well.

“Are you sure they’re not dating?” Hakoda asked, his voice quiet as he addressed Sokka. Sokka sent Zuko a menacing glare, the scarred prince gulping and loosening his hold on you when he noticed.

“What were you thinking?” you cried out, finally pulling away from Zuko and slapping his head.

“Ow!” Zuko hissed, rubbing the spot you had hit. “I was thinking ‘let me get rid of this lever real quick so that they don’t catch us’.”

“You could’ve gotten captured!” you yelled at him, taking a step towards him.

“Way to think ahead,” Sokka commented, saving Zuko from another slap.

“We’re finally on our way.” Suki sighed, sharing a soft smile with Sokka.

“Wait,” Hakoda said, leaning out of the window. “Who’s that?”

You leaned out of the window on the other side of the gondola, resisting the urge to blush as you felt Zuko’s chest press up against your back as he tried to get a good look at the platform.

“That’s a problem,” Zuko groaned. “It’s my sister and her friend.”

“This is a rematch I’ve been waiting for,” Suki growled, cracking her knuckles.

“Get in line,” you scoffed, your eyes narrowing as you watched the princess approach. You climbed out of the gondola and onto the roof, being followed by Sokka, Suki, and Zuko.

Suki and Sokka turned to face Ty Lee as she landed onto the roof gracefully, quickly becoming preoccupied with the chi-blocker. You carefully observed Azula as she landed a few feet away from you, staring you down as she stalked closer.

“Well, well, well,” she spoke, her voice taunting. “If it isn’t the Water Tribe scum.”

“Don’t speak to her like that,” Zuko barked, stepping slightly in front of you.

“Aww, does Zuzu have a little crush?” Azula teased, pouting as she shifted her gaze to Zuko. “Snap out of it Zuko. We raided her village multiple times. She’ll never see you as anything other than a monster.”

“Still not over what your mother used to say about you huh?” you shot back, missing the hurt look in Azula’s eyes as she shot lightning at you. You swiftly dodged the blast and ran at her, sliding onto the ground when she let out another blast.

Zuko watched as you stood up, landing a solid hit on his sister before bouncing back and dodging the hit she sent your way. He tried to find an opening to attack Azula but eventually gave up for fear of hurting you. Instead he chose to jump into the fight and wipe out the blasts Azula kept sending at you, even if you were expertly dodging them.

Azula soon grew tired of the fight, and knowing that she couldn’t beat you in the moment decided to send a blast of fire at Zuko. She caught him off guard and although he managed to wipe out the blast, he ended up tumbling back and landing dangerously close to the gondola’s edge.

“Zuko!” you yelled, momentarily distracted from the fight. Azula took this chance to kick you down, punching you before kicking you once more when you tried to scramble to your feet. You were sent stumbling against the metal handle that attached the gondola to the cable, gasping in pain as you crashed against it. She grinned widely when your head hit the metal.

You blew your hair out of your face, wincing as you reached up to touch the sore spot on your head and sighing when you noticed the blood on your fingertips.

“You have nowhere to go,” Azula stated, stalking towards you. Blue fire danced at her fingertips, her eyes hungry with anticipation as you struggled to stand. “Such a shame, you could’ve been a great asset to me.”

“I would rather die than join you,” you shot back, finally managing to stand up.

“Fine,” Azula spat, the fire growing as she narrowed her eyes. “Have it your way.”

You closed your eyes and braced yourself, knowing that you were in no shape to block her attack. You felt the heat approaching before it disappeared. Opening your eyes, you gasped softly as you saw Zuko standing in front of you. He sent blasts of fire back at Azula before the gondola swung dangerously, sending them both stumbling.

“They’re about to cut the line!” Ty Lee shouted at Azula.

“Then it’s time to leave,” the princess smirked. “Goodbye Zuko.”

Azula blasted away as Ty Lee backflipped gracefully onto the other gondola. Zuko glared at Azula briefly before rushing to your side, reaching down and gently picking you up.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his face twisting with concern as you stumbled.

“Yeah,” you breathed. “Just peachy.”

You tried to walk on your own only to stumble once more and fall right into Zuko’s arms. You shook your head slightly, trying to walk off once more.

“(Y/N), stop,” Zuko said, scooping your legs up and fully carrying you.

“P-Put me down!” you yelled, drawing Sokka and Suki’s attention.

“Hey! Put her down,” Sokka cried, rushing over to your side. He was stopped when the gondola swayed again.

“Stop struggling,” Zuko hissed, tightening his grip on you. “You can’t walk without stumbling. You probably have a concussion.”

You pouted but stayed silent, knowing that the prince was right. Carefully, he made his way over to the edge of the gondola, noticing that Hakoda was leaning out of the window. Carefully, he handed you down to him, making sure that you were safely inside before swinging himself in as well. Sokka and Suki quickly followed.

“They’re cutting the line,” Zuko stated, exchanging glances with everyone else. “The gondola’s about to go!”

“I hope this thing floats,” Hakoda said, fussing over your head wound as you tried to push him away.

“Hey!” you suddenly cried as the gondola began to move. You glanced out the window. “Who’s that?”

“That’s Mai!” Zuko exclaimed, his eyebrows furrowing as he observed her fighting with the guards.

The gondola made it to the other side without any other mishaps. When you got there, Zuko carefully picked you up once again, making his way out of the gondola. Sokka kept his gaze on him, only looking away when he felt Suki grab his hand. She shook her head at him before looking at you and Zuko. “Calm down. There are worse people she could be with.”

Sokka rolled his eyes at her words before trailing after Zuko, a barely visible smile appearing on his face as he noticed how Zuko was fussing over you as well. Hakoda and Chit Sang tossed the warden back into the gondola before joining the group. They all walked for a while before Zuko paused, standing on the cliff that was overlooking the rest of the volcano.

“What’s wrong Zuko?” you asked quietly, your eyes not leaving his face as he scanned the landscape in front of him. At this point, everyone else had backtracked to where you were standing.

“My sister was on that island,” was his only response.

“Yeah, and she's probably right behind us, so let's not stop!” Sokka said, trying to convince Zuko to keep moving.

“What I mean is she must have come here somehow,” he replied, his eyes still looking around.

“There!” you exclaimed, pointing at a large airship. “That's our way out of here!“

~

The six of you all managed to make it to the airship quickly enough and Zuko quickly lit the fire and guided it away from The Boiling Rock. The atmosphere was lively as everyone tried to catch up with each other, the excitement from the day eventually leaving everyone as the sun began setting. One by one, everyone fell asleep until it was just you and Zuko awake.

You had been looking around the ship, smirking in victory when you found a first aid kit. Silently you wandered out to where Zuko was, trying not to startle him.

“Long night?” you asked, leaning on the wall next to him.

“Someone has to keep the fire going,” he retorted, a faint smile present on his handsome face.

“Can you help me?” you asked quietly, meeting his eyes as he turned to face you. He nodded and you handed him the first aid kit before sitting down in front of him. You flinched slightly as his hand grabbed your jaw, closing your eyes as you reveled in his touch, remaining oblivious to the way his heart was racing at the close proximity. His touch was feather light in comparison to the guard who had grasped your jaw in a similar way back at the Boiling Rock. You snorted softly as you recalled the incident that had taken place a mere day ago; it seemed like it had happened ages ago.

“I’m sorry,” Zuko whispered, tilting your head to get better access to the cut on your head.

“It’s fine, it doesn’t hurt,” you murmured back, eyes still closed.

“Not about that,” Zuko replied, cleaning the wound as best as he could with the supplies you had given him. You hissed softly as he tried to place the bandage on, breathing deeply to try and ignore the pain. “I’m sorry about everything. I’m sorry for hunting the Avatar down and chasing you all around the world. I’m sorry about your mother. I’m sorry for the raids that tore your village apart. I’m sorry that I kept causing you harm even when I had the chance to do good.”

You opened your eyes at his words, reaching up and gently grabbing his hand to bring his attention to you. He could’ve sworn his heart skipped a beat. You stared at him in silence, his golden eyes never leaving yours even as he fidgeted uncomfortably under your gaze. Your face softened as you realized just how full of guilt Zuko really was, your heart aching as you realized that you couldn’t spend any more time hating him. Not when he had already done so much to try and make up for his mistakes.

“No Zuko,” you finally spoke, guiding him to take a seat in front of you. “I’m sorry for being so harsh towards you. You did more than enough to prove that you aren’t the same bratty prince you were when we first met but I wasn’t willing to look past the fact that you were once our enemy. You left the Fire Nation to help Aang and I can’t imagine how hard that was-”

“Trust me,” Zuko interjected, laughing humorlessly. “It wasn’t that hard. My father and sister are horrible people.”

“Still,” you said, leaning in a bit. “They’re your family. Betraying your family isn’t easy, even if you don’t get along with them.”

Silence ensued as Zuko stood up and carefully finished bandaging your cut. He took his seat in front of you once more, watching the fire as you watched him.

“What?” Zuko asked, his cheeks heating up he realized that you were still staring at him.

“Thank you Zuko,” you stated, finally looking away from the golden-eyed boy.

“Don’t thank me,” Zuko replied. “It was Sokka’s idea to break you out.”

“I mean for saving me from Azula,” you whispered, looking back up at him. “She really had me backed into a corner.”

“I wasn’t going to let her hurt you,” Zuko stated, staring into your eyes. “Sokka would’ve killed me if we came all this way just to lose you to her.”

You giggled at his words, causing him to smirk in satisfaction as he realized that he had made you laugh. “He would’ve, wouldn’t he?”

There was another silence before you spoke up again. “In all seriousness, thank you. I never thought that I’d be calling Prince Zuko my hero.”

Zuko gulped as he realized just how close the two of you were. Neither of you made a move to back away and you flushed when you caught yourself glancing at the prince’s lips.

You blushed harder when you realized he had caught you in the act.

“Zuko,” you whispered, squeaking softly when said boy leaned forwards and connected his lips with yours. The kiss was soft and hesitant, with both of you holding your breath as you realized you were kissing each other.

Pulling away, Zuko’s eyes widened. “Oh spirits. I-I’m sorry. I can’t believe I just did th-”

You cut Zuko’s apology off with another kiss, this one a little less awkward. His hand came up and grabbed your waist, pulling you a little closer as his other hand cupped your cheek. Your hand came up to grab his forearm, your brain trying to comprehend the fact that you were kissing Zuko and wondering how in the world he was such a good kisser.

“I thought you said you weren’t dating my daughter.”

The two of you flew apart as you heard Hakoda’s voice.

“D-Dad!” you exclaimed. “We weren’t- I wasn’t-”

Hakoda held up a hand to stop your stuttering. “It doesn’t matter. He risked his life to help your brother break you out of prison which means he’s good in my books. Just please don’t kiss in front of me. And maybe don’t let Sokka find out about this just yet. Good night.”

You turned to Zuko in embarrassment as Hakoda walked away, making eye contact with him before the two of you dissolved into laughter.

“Well that’s one way to get the parent’s approval,” you muttered, smiling at Zuko as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you into him.

The two of you spent the rest of the night awake, talking about everything and nothing, stargazing as Zuko kept the flame alive.

“You know, I used to know the moon spirit when she was alive,” you said smugly, glancing up at Zuko as he smiled widely at you.

“Oh really?”

“Yeah! In fact, she was Sokka’s first girlfriend.”

Zuko smiled and pressed another kiss to your lips, smiling softly when he felt your hand come up to his chest.

And in that moment, Zuko knew he had made the right decision by deciding to join the Avatar. After all, if he hadn’t then why would the universe have chosen to reward him with something as amazing as you.

~

taglist!

@musicalkeys, @mywigglybaby​, @bubblebars​, @iguessthefloorislava​

[lovetique]

at least she could walk off to the kitchen with relief in her chest he was agreeing to leave all those obstacles that caused hurt, despite doing them for his safety, in the past. and the pinky promise left a small happy imprint on her heart that clung to a lost childhood oath's like pinky promises. still, a few tears did manage to slip from her eyes onto her bag she took from rory's as she leaned over it, hand sunk into it to pull out pink care bear slippers. sticking her feet into them once dropped in front of her and shuffling to his kitchen with her phone in her hand. by time she was sipping on found water, remembering the tea that was still waiting for her on his nightstand and clearing off all those harassing messages with quick swipes of her thumb. the suddenness of arms capturing her startled elena, despite how attentive his movements were. causing her to tense in his embrace and then relax once brain registered she wasn't running from anyone and where she was at. hands lifted to gently curl around the front of his arms, home– this was home. "it's okay." smiling at his apology and the kiss to her head, it did mean a lot to hear it. then was quiet for a moment, feeling guilt he had to be sorry even if he did say some things that upset her. no, he hadn't said the right things a second ago. but he was saying them now. "you didn't mean to. it's not worse.. i'm just overly sensitive." she claimed, just to keep him from feeling bad. even if it was true about herself, maybe she was being too sensitive..? "i get more sensitive than i already am when i'm tired." she nuzzled her temple against bicep, temporarily closing her eyes shut. "this is really all i needed, though. so thank you," she tells him, letting him know how much him coming after her and giving her a hug helped flush away all the sadness consuming her chest. it worked like magic getting rid of all the gloom, especially when she came in here to hide her need to cry but now that was changed because she didn't feel the need to now. "i need to text my mom. let her know i'm okay, that i'm with you. let's go back to your room and take a picture with our tea you made us, i'll show her. she'll love that, i promise. she'll find it super cute– like me." a smile finally pulled at her lips, head canting up to stare up at her dinosaur in height boyfriend with bambi eyes. which caused that smile to spread more secretly, at remembering that embarrassing nickname she made for him that he didn't like. it almost made her want to laugh, especially when he had no idea what she was thinking about. just her and a pair of innocent doe-eyes staring up at him, he didn't have to know.

               neither  of  them  had  ever  the  opportunity  to  voice  their  respective  insecurities  so  honestly  before  now  .  with  nothing  holding  them  back  ,  it  was  hard  to  quell  the  thoughts  that  had  been  devouring  marcus'  mind  for  months  on  end  .  but  even  so  ,  it  wasn't  worth  this.  "  i  agree  .  i  don't  think  we  should  live  in  the  past  .  i  don't  want  to  go  back  .  it  sucked  ,  it  didn't  work  for  a  reason  .  "  a  hand  weaves  through  his  hair  ,  tugging  on  dark  strands  out  of  frustration  .  god  ,  he  never  got  his  point  across  very  well  ,  did  he  ?  "  but  i  don't  want  you  to  make  anything  up  to  me  ,  you  don't  have  to  .  ever  .  it's  squashed  .  i  just  want  a  real  shot  at  this  .  "  he  can  feel  her  inspective  gaze  ,  a  gnawing  inference  that  maybe  she  didn't  believe  him  or  wasn't  satisfied  by  the  answer  .  either  way  ,  a  tenacious  melancholy  remained  ,  and  he  wished  nothing  more  than  to take  it  away  .  "  deal  ,  "  he  promises  to  not  leave  ,  finding  her  pinky  ,  knowing  she  took  these  sort  of  gestures  like  an  oath  .  a  childlike  frown  tugs  at  his  lips  as  she  leaves.  he  waits  for  a  few  minutes  ,  bare  back  leaning  returning  to  it's  spot  against  the  headboard  ,  until  he  can  feel  himself  moving  forward  ,  pulling  himself  up  from  the  bed  and  padding  toward  the  kitchen  .  he  stops  in  the  door  frame  ,  leaning  with  his  arms  crossed  .  the  emotion  on  elena's  face  is  clear  ,  and  it  strikes  his  sympathy  .  she  had  been  through  a  certain  hell  tonight  ,  and  he  hadn't  done  much  to  make  it  any  better  .  in  fact  ,  he  had  probably  made  it  worse  with  the  news  of  his  leaving  and  the  way  they  toed  the  line  of  an  argument  just  a  moment  ago  .  marcus  approaches  her  cautiously  ,  painstakingly  slow  to  wrap  his  arms  around  her  from  behind  once  he's  close  enough  .  he  presses  a  soft  kiss  into  her  hair,  swaying  slowly  .  "  i'm  sorry  .  i  know  tonight  has  been  awful  .  i'm  sorry  if  i've  made  it  worse  .  "

[aminiatureworld]

Injury II

Characters: Kaeya, Ningguang, Xiao, Zhongli, gn!reader

Word Count: 5,650

Warnings: Various injuries, blood, burns, minor villain death

Premise: Sometimes the pain of others can hurt even more than one’s own. In which the reader is injured.

Author’s Note: Okay so after the mind numbing fear of my computer almost dying and now maybe emitting a weird smell I’m five seconds away from pure panic. But the show much go on! Even if my word document keeps blacking out.

This is my first time writing for Ningguang! I hope I do my girl justice, she’s voiced by my fav VA, she’s a total powerhouse, I love her so much. 

I tried to make all of the injuries personal to each character in some way. Funny enough Zhongli’s was the hardest to figure out. I eventually settled upon the act of you being injured causing Zhongli’s personal angst, rather than the cause of the injury. I hope it came out well!

Kaeya

Kaeya didn’t often let himself fall into fear. Not since he’d been young did he feel that he could indulge in such a sentiment. True to his vision he’d frozen that part of himself, and now when panic seized him he could feel nothing but stone cold determination, and the need to continue forward without hesitation. Fear was hardly alien to him, he could conjure up the emotion all too well, but it had been dulled and replaced by cynicism and coldness. And occasionally guilt.

Looking back on it Kaeya wasn’t even sure why the two of you had strayed so close to Dragonspine, so close snowflakes were congregating in your hair.

You’d called him a winter fairy in jest at the time, wondering if he wasn’t truly the ruler of that mountain of frost. He’d laughed then, before threatening to take you away to his fairy court. “That would be quite an easy task.” You’d replied. “You’ve already captured my heart after all.”

The two of you were strolling on the rocks that lined the river which separated Dragonspine from the greater Monstadt area. Although adventurers usually roamed the area in the daytime it was now evening, and the lack of people certainly made up for the cold in Kaeya’s mind. He could only be his true self around you after all. Otherwise it was the charming and slick Cavalry Captain, a man who always knew what to say and never harbored any doubts in his mind. Not that he wasn’t still charming around you, he loved seeing you blush from his effusive praise, loved the way you buried your head in his shoulder if the flirting and the teasing ramped up enough. But there was a sincerity to his words that one couldn’t find normally in Kaeya, and he loved to show you bits and pieces of his soul, relieved to finally have someone to talk to.

“Watch your step.” You warned, grabbing onto Kaeya’s hand as he slid a little ways along a rock.

“Thank you darling, although I daresay I’m more worried about you. After all who’s the snow fairy here and who’s the wind sprite, liable to blow away at any moment?”

“So cheesy.” You mumbled, shaking your head, though Kaeya could’ve sworn your cheeks were slightly redder than they were a few moments ago. Laughing he wrapped his arm around your waist. You snuggled into his fur lined coat. “Cold.” You murmured, though you made no move to disconnect yourself. Kaeya smiled and brought his other hand around you in a soft embrace.

“Sorry my dearest, but you’re in love with an icicle.”

“Only terms of magic.” You shot back. “Otherwise you’re a nice warm fire. And don’t you forget that.”

The two of you headed a little ways down, closer to the river. A small group of frost flowers had made it to this side of the banks, and you were adamant on picking some. “They’re so beautiful!” You explained to Kaeya. “And incredibly strong, I can’t believe they managed to grow in that permafrost. They’re simply lovely.”

“Just be careful.” Kaeya commented, standing a little ways back. He didn’t like getting near the river, a river so cold it was always at nearly freezing at the bottom. Cold water and a vision of Cryo didn’t mix well.

“I’ll be fine.” You hopped to your feet, a bouquet of pale blue in your hand. You were smiling from your victory, face full of light and happiness.

It was an expression that changed swiftly as you lost your balance and plummeted into the freezing waters.

Immediately Kaeya leapt down from the rocks he was standing on, kneeling near where you were standing a moment ago. The river wasn’t very fast, bogged down by its width and how far it was away from the waterfalls in the warmer parts of Monstadt. Still it cut off very quickly, having barely the semblance of a beach before opening into a deep chasm, and anyone who fell in it would quickly fall into cold shock. Already your limbs had started seizing, and you were hyperventilating hard. Your arms felt like dead weight, and every second that passed your head dipped lower into the freezing water.

Kaeya gingerly put his hand out to make a platform of ice for him to stand on. Whatever happened he couldn’t fall in as well, it would mean the death of you two. Fear had reared its ugly head again and Kaeya twisted those feelings into action. No matter what he had to act fast and sure. Hesitation was fatal.

Plunging his hand into the water, sucking in a deep breath as the ice that still coated his palms and fingers made contact with the freezing river Kaeya hauled you up onto the icy platform. Taking off his coat he wrapped you up. Removing your gloves so the frozen water wouldn’t be in contact with your already freezing skin Kaeya cursed as he ran towards Springvale, the nearest place he could think of. He’d lugged you onto his back, and could feel the freezing water through his shirt. As he ran he kept up a stream of slightly shaky conversation, rattling off what little he knew of hypothermia.

“It’ll be alright darling, I promise it’ll be alright. You’re just going through shock right now, okay? You’ll be alright, I promise. Just stay awake a little while longer. I know you must be tired from all that excitement, but just stay awake a little longer, just a little longer and then you’ll be nice and warm, just stay awake right now okay?” His voice became more and more desperate as his fear started to tumble out of his grasp, but he kept moving. He wouldn’t lose control of himself now, not until you were safe.

Finally he arrived at Springvale and you’d been rushed to the village doctor. Kaeya was told to go and wait somewhere else, and preferably change out of his freezing cold shirt, but you’d grabbed his hand as he turned to leave and after that he refused to budge, instead borrowing a shirt from the village. He’d reimburse the people who let you two borrow their clothes later.

The entire process was a terrifying one, as you were slowly brought back to warmth. Kaeya took the opportunity to learn as much as he could, noting that you shouldn’t massage limbs back to warmth for fear of heart attack and – much to his chagrin he later joked when the situation was far enough in the past – alcohol was too much of a depressant on your system and could lead to death. All throughout he kept talking to you, even though there were times you didn’t seem to hear, times when he thought his heart would split in two.

Still it was evident you were going to survive and when you’d finally finished being warmed up Kaeya thought he could cry in relief, if only he’d been numbed from such an act for so many years. You’d run into some sort of rock in the water, and the long gash down the side of your leg was later determined by the doctor to reveal torn muscle. It’d take about a month and a half for you to recover. Kaeya thought he should’ve felt worse about it, but in the moment he felt nothing but relief, utter relief in the knowledge you were going to be fine. Utter relief that came with having almost lost you.

Kaeya had carried you back to Monstadt, much to your consternation. All the ways back you mumbled about how his penchant for drama seemed to have increased tenfold. Kaeya simply shook his head, not bothering to ask how you would’ve gotten back otherwise with your leg in the shape it was. Still it was a relief to both of you to see the city walls. Even more of a relief when you finally arrived home, safe and sound.

“I’m so glad you were there.” You confessed as Kaeya sat you down on the couch, propping up your leg and pulling a chair up next to you. “I don’t know what I would’ve done had I fallen and you weren’t there.”

“You probably wouldn’t have been there in the first place.” Kaeya remarked, unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice. You brought your hand up to his cheek and he leaned into it slightly, grateful for the contact between you two. It’d been hours but the panic that he’d felt still tugged at his consciousness, as if any moment you might slip away again and leave him panicked and alone.

“Were you afraid?” You asked.

“Of course I was afraid.” Kaeya’s reply came swift and sure. “I was terrified, terrified in a way that I haven’t been in years.” Kaeya’s eyes clouded over, as if reaching deep into his memories. He brought your hand up to his lips, kissing your knuckles and then your palm. “I thought that you might die, and in that moment I was ready to curse the world all over again.”

“But I didn’t die.” You said solemnly.

“No, you didn’t.”

“And that’s because of you. Because you reacted quickly, because you had the magic with which to do so, and most of all because you never hesitated. And because of that I’m alive and well now. Injuries aside I’ll be fine. I promise.”

Kaeya knew you were right. You were alive. You weren’t going to go where he couldn’t follow. The fear coiling in his stomach began to subside. He’d been so afraid, yes, and in that fear he’d managed to find the strength and determination to save you. But now you were safe and he no longer needed to rely on that strength; he could give into his relief. Realizing this, realizing how frightened he’d been and how that was now part of a past he could move forward from, could truly forget, Kaeya could only marvel at his relief. Only then did the tears begin to fall.

 Ningguang

If there was one thing Ningguang wasn’t expecting out of today it was your leg collapsing and her winding up in the waiting room of the Liyue hospital, mind replaying the last week or so, wondering where she might’ve realized something was wrong.

It seemed like the kind of thing Keqing would make a joke about. Here Ningguang was, the Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing, the most powerful woman in the trade capital of Liyue; here she was, her world completely gone awry, completely shattered by your injury.

A stress fracture, the doctor had said. It was the kind of injury that developed slowly and came about after weeks instead of in moments. The initial strain was usually something mundane, a sprain, a bruise, maybe you’d walked on your foot for too long. But after sometimes weeks of ignoring pain and swelling your body couldn’t take it any longer. Ten weeks, that’s how long you would be laid up. And Ningguang couldn’t help but feel every one of those ten weeks was her fault.

She should’ve noticed it. That train of thought continued all throughout the process of you being treated at, and eventually discharged from, the hospital. You weren’t just one of the people she worked with daily, weren’t just her closest colleague. You were the person that Ningguang loved more than anything in this world. How could she possibly not have noticed the signs?

Ningguang found herself obsessively trying to connect the warning signs that must’ve been there. She knew that your foot had been aching for some time, but though she’d been vaguely concerned she’d said nothing other than a simple “be careful”. She’d never thought to check after you later, sure that it was nothing. Now she felt nothing but shame, both that of a personal and of a greater kind. How could she manage looking after all of Liyue if she couldn’t even look after you?

You noticed Ningguang’s silence as you two made your way out of the hospital and towards the apartment you shared. Although Ningguang was perhaps seen as a reticent individual you’d found her surprisingly open, always ready to discuss things that were of interest either to you or to her. She wasn’t the kind of person to walk along in silence; not when she was around those that she cared for, not unless she was thinking about something important, not unless…

Finally you two arrived home. You collapsed on the couch, tired and ready to either read or nap. Ningguang was preparing some tea and a various array of fruit, not that there was much food in the lavish apartment you two shared. Considering the workload between the both of you it was perhaps unsurprising that there was nothing much to eat. That would have to change, Ningguang noted; she’d make sure that you were recovering in the most comfortable way possible. It was the least she could do.

“Are you feeling well?” Ningguang asked, placing the food and tea on the table in your room. You nodded.

“I feel fine, although I’m not looking forward to the walk to the Qixing headquarters. I have to admit dear this might be the only time I’m a bit glad that I don’t have to make my way to the Jade Chamber every day.” Ningguang smiled at that, but it didn’t reach her eyes. She sat silently, sipping her tea slowly. Your expression clouded over. “Hey, can you tell me what’s wrong?”

“Oh it’s nothing my love.” Ningguang spoke up quickly, leaning over and kissing you on the cheek. “I’m just sorry to see you like this.”

“Well you can’t blame yourself. You know that, right?”

Ningguang found she couldn’t bring herself to lie to you. Your gaze, though soft, seemed to pierce right through all her excuses and all her bluffing. She sighed softly. Maybe it would be better to be upfront about it, clear and concise, how one should always be. At least then she could apologize properly.

“In truth I do blame myself. I can’t believe I was so neglectful of your health, so blind to your pain.” She shook her head, staring at the hand that was holding yours. A disconnected part of her thought of how well the two fit together, fingers intertwined softly, your palm warm and comforting.

“If you were blind to this then so was I.” You spoke softly but firmly, refusing to sugar coat your words. Ningguang admired you for it, even if she didn’t believe you, something painfully clear in the expression on her face. “You cannot blame yourself.” You continued, “I won’t let you. I don’t want you beating yourself up for something that neither of us predicted. If you feel the need to blame yourself for this you must also blame me; I was the one walking on the injury without paying enough attention.”

“But – ” Ningguang paused, realizing the truth behind your words, slouching slightly she sat in deep thought. “I… I realize there’s not a lot of logic behind my thinking.”

“Well feelings are hardly logical.” You pointed out, squeezing her hand. “And because they’re illogical they don’t go away quickly. But I at least want you to try and combat your guilt with what I’ve told you. Because just like you hate seeing me in this cast I hate seeing you in pain.”

Ningguang nodded, heart filled with a deep sense of love and tenderness. Leaning over to give you a kiss she smiled softly. You did too. For a moment you two basked in each other’s presence and happiness, before you smile turned mischievous.

“Although… I won’t object to a little pampering.” Ningguang chuckled, shaking her head. But her smile was real this time, and you wouldn’t ask for anything more.

“You’re lucky I love you so much.”

“I know I am.” You replied. “And you’re lucky I adore you.”

“I am.” Ningguang’s reply was just as sure, was full of quiet but strong emotion. She was lucky. And she would never take you or your love for granted. No matter what.

 Xiao

By the time he’d met you Xiao had long come to the conclusion that he’d never find it in him to like humans.

Humans were dirty, they were untrustworthy and full of darkness, they broke things without thinking about it, mangled their own people, their own families and friends and countrymen. Humans slaughtered one another without thinking of how it might stain them, and when they weren’t killing they were stealing and lying and ruining the land around them. How could he, a being designed solely to destroy the darkness in the world, ever find in himself the will or the ability to look past all that?

When he’d met you and had fallen in love in earnest this view had still changed ultimately very little. But even if you’d admitted that what he said was mostly true, you’d found that you still wanted him to learn to care at least a little bit about humanity. I mean you were ultimately one of them at your core. It didn’t feel right to prop yourself up as the one great exception, not when there were other people who were certainly like you in mind and in morality. Xiao silently disagreed with this analysis; to him there never was and never would be someone like you, in all of Teyvat. Still, he felt compelled to try, though  more for your sake than for his, and as the weeks had gone on he’d begun to look at humanity not with any sort of respect or hope but with a sort of begrudging curiosity, and an admittance that maybe, just maybe, there was a bit of that light you saw in it.

What a fool he’d been.

Although Xiao was aware of the growing threat of treasure hoarders across Liyue – so widespread that they’d even managed to eat away at the tranquil lands surrounding Jueyen Karst – he’d never considered them a serious threat. So when the two of you accidentally ran into a group of them while exploring some of the older Liyue ruins Xiao didn’t bother to do much more than wrap an arm around your waist, sure that even the most idiotic of treasure hoarders wouldn’t be so foolish as to pick a fight with either an adeptus or their beloved. You seemed unfazed at any rate, explaining that the two of you were simply passing by and had no desire to pick a fight; if they’d be so kind the two of you would be on your way.

Perhaps the treasure hoarders were well aware of the fact that you could report them to the Liyue Qixing. Perhaps they were simply in a bad mood. Either way your words apparently did nothing. Xiao was becoming tenser and tenser, feeling as if something catastrophic was about to happen. That moment came to pass when one of the treasure hoarders pulled out a knife and threw it, lodging itself with deadly accuracy into your torso.

At that point Xiao felt himself overcome with a supernatural sort of calm, a calm which raced to cover up the anguish and rage that was coursing through him, threatening to burn him from the inside out. He only paused to make sure you didn’t hit the ground hard, before summoning his spear. Ignoring the cries of the treasure hoarders he made quick work of disposing of them, for what was a measly human, a piece of trash, when compared to that which had slayed countless demons? A small part of him cried out against the act, pointing out the fact that every time he wielded his polearm to kill it might bring him closer to the precipice, the fact that you were hurt mattered more than revenge, the fact that he was going to regret killing in front of you. He ignored it. At that moment there was nothing in his mind, it was as empty and staid as a clear pool of water. The only ripple in it was the way you’d jolted back in surprised, and the way you’d let out a cry before crumpling.

Xiao didn’t look back to see the havoc he’d wreaked. Instead he ran to your side. Peeling off his gloves, worried that they might bring infection, he pressed his bare hands to your wound, desperately trying to staunch the blood that was spilling out, ignoring the shocks that jolted through his hands, the result of the dagger somehow being infused with electro. The feeling of blood, your blood, beneath his fingers was nauseating, and for a moment Xiao felt his head filling with static as the pure panic that he’d felt began to overcome the initial rush of adrenaline. Snapping out of it when you let out a groan of pain Xiao looked into your eyes. They were clouded, and for a moment the adeptus was afraid you might be on the verge of passing out – had you really lost so much blood? Holding you tightly, one hand never leaving your wound, Xiao summoned a burst of air. His thoughts were still too chaotic to be processed, there was only one thing connecting them all. Let them live. If there’s any justice in this world, please let them live.

Verr Goldet had grasped the situation as soon as she saw Xiao appear on the balcony, face contorted in fear. Taking you to her room, she’d instructed Xiao to get one of the doctors from Liyue while she and the resident apothecary took care of you. Xiao did the task without thinking, and once he’d arrived with the doctor he refused to leave your side. Xiao knew death better than most adepti, certainly more than most humans. It was cold and unfeeling, and had a nasty habit of leaping onto people when they least expected it. It didn’t matter to him that all three, Goldet, the apothecary, and the doctor, said that you would be fine; Xiao was going to be there the entire time.

Eventually you managed to rouse yourself from the pain induced stupor, and when you did you saw Xiao first, eyes wide with fear and relief, tears threatening to spill down his face.

In the end you’d been lucky. Although the dagger had ruptured your spleen Xiao had acted quickly enough to avert catastrophe. You were going to survive, though it’d be 12 weeks most likely until you were completely recovered. The moment of crisis having passed the two of you were finally given a moment alone.

“Are you alright?” Xiao immediately asked. You didn’t make a move to answer, instead cupping Xiao’s cheek before moving to take his hand. At that moment how Xiao remembered. Oh; the blood. Quickly moving away he ran to the nearest basin of water, scrubbing furiously. As the water turned red a faint smell of iron filled the air; it was the most disgusting thing Xiao had ever smelt, and he scrubbed even harder. You waited silently as he finished cleaning his hands and disposing of the water. Finally he came back to sit next to you, still hesitating a moment before placing his palm in yours.

“I… I don’t understand how you could ever like humans.” That was the first thing Xiao could think of. “They betrayed you. Without even blinking. That man, all those men and women, they would’ve ended your life without even thinking about it. They would’ve killed you and lived without ever having such a thing weigh on their conscience. Humans never think about the weight of their sins. They just keep committing atrocities.”

“And what about you, Xiao. Will their deaths weigh on you?”

“As much as all the others.” Xiao wished he could be matter of fact about it, but he found that trait of his had somehow disappeared. Instead an emotion washed over him, so unfamiliar and unexplainable it seemed to choke him. “Perhaps more.” He managed to get out, before beginning to cry in earnest.

You would’ve died. If he hadn’t been there you would’ve died. For you he gladly shouldered the weight of human life, would do so again and again if only to ensure your safety. And yet it was such a heavy weight, and no matter how many Xiao killed it wouldn’t heal you.

“I’m sorry.” He choked out. You shook your head.

“Xiao I always knew that you weren’t going to be able to see humans as I see them immediately. And I know that you have a relationship with death and killing that most humans, most beings, will never have. I’m not going to blame you, nor will I turn on you. I cannot pretend that what happened didn’t make me angry. In retrospect it made me incredibly angry. It’s also true that – had you not been there – I would’ve raised my own weapon in self-defense. But now I’m going to ask you for one thing, and one thing only.”

“What?”

“Help me recover. Help me recover and let me help you recover. If there’s one thing I don’t want to happen now it’s for you to turn away from me and from everyone else, to let yourself be consumed. I want you to have somewhere you can let your feelings exist, and I want somewhere I can feel happy and comfortable as myself. You make me feel that way, so even if it’s selfish I don’t want you to turn away. And I don’t want you to grieve for me. Injured as I may be I’m not dead.” There was a pause as you let yourself catch your breath, having gotten more and more excited as you went on. “I realize that’s more than one thing.” You concluded, a bit sheepish.

Xiao said nothing for a while before leaning towards you. “May I?” He whispered. You nodded and Xiao pressed his lips to yours. The kiss wasn’t one of fire or passion. It was different, defined within the parameters of fear and relief, there seemed to be a sort of desperation in it, yet it was surprisingly sedate. Pulling away Xiao buried his face in your neck, careful to make sure he wasn’t touching where you’d been stabbed.

“I will. I promise.” He whispered. You nodded, smiling softly. But Xiao couldn’t bring himself to smile, not just yet.

Xiao couldn’t understand humans. They were dirty and cruel and lived without fear of consequences. Their actions haunted him and he found them easier to hate than to understand. But for you he’d try, because to him there was one thing strong than all, strong than fear, stronger than mistrust, stronger than hatred.

And that was the love he held for you.

 Zhongli

If there was one thing Zhongli hadn’t been prepared for when it came to falling in love with humans it was their combination of fragility and utter ignorance to said fragility.

One of Zhongli’s favorite things to do was to simply sit and listen to you talk about your life. Humans fascinated Zhongli, it was one of the reasons he’d ultimately given up his place as Rex Lapis; inside him lived a desire to interact with humanity in a more intimate way, to know what made people behave as they did and to perhaps grow closer to them in the process.

But despite all that he still wasn’t ready for the utter fear he felt when listening to the stories of you getting hurt. You’d laughed off scrapes and bruises and fractures. The time you’d accidentally ripped off your nail was a painful yet funny anecdote, and the fact that you’d fractured your kneecap as a child was something you now looked back on with an odd sense of nostalgia.

Zhongli didn’t understand why these stories frightened him on such a visceral level. Such injuries were nothing to gods and adepti. Although the idea of a broken bone was certainly an irritation there was nothing more in it, and the kind of injuries that could easily kill humans would to Zhongli be the kind of thing that would be unpleasant for its novelty, not for its potential fatality.

He didn’t bring up these thoughts to you, feeling as if they’d somehow place an undue burden on you, or perhaps he was afraid you’d stop telling him about yourself. Still it lurked at the back of his mind, the fear of what might happen to you.

The fears that Zhongli harbored were proven in the most mundane, and thus most poignant, way. The two of you had been preparing a meal when suddenly you’d stumbled on an uneven part of the floor. Reaching your hands out to steady yourself your arm had landed flat on the hot stove, the stove which had been heating up for the past fifteen or so minutes. The scream that you let out sent a shock through Zhongli which shook him to his core. It rang through his ears incessantly, a terrifying reminder of how breakable humans were.

You’d immediately yanked your arm off from the stove but the sight that met both his and your eyes was a ghastly one. The skin on your arm was charred various colors, white blisters mixed with black flaky skin, all outlined in a terrible circle of red. You were shaking, and you face had turned a frightful ashen color. Springing into action Zhongli wracked his brain for all he could remember about burns. If the burn is serious enough go to the hospital. Never try to treat intense burns yourself as the burning has gone deeper than the initial layer of skin, raise your burn above your heart. Go to the hospital. Slinging your arm around his shoulder so that it was raised, whisper soft words of reassurance as you let out a shriek of pain, Zhongli half walked half carried you to the hospital, all while the same thought was running through his head.

How fragile humans are.

The doctors had insisted you stay overnight. Apparently the burn was bad enough to require surgery. Zhongli’s stomach had dropped as he was told that, but he managed to nod in response. Walking back home Zhongli felt all in a daze. He barely made it in the door before he collapsed, fear having seeped the energy out of him. The world pressed down on him, heavier than it’d ever been before. At least you’d be okay, he reminded himself. If he had anything to cling to at least he had that.

Zhongli was the first visitor to arrive at the hospital, having given Hu Tao the run of the funeral home as he spent as much time as possible with you. You were well enough, although a bit bogged down from the painkillers you’d been given. You’d once offhandedly commented that although magic infused medicine tended to be safer for the patient – more successful and less addictive – it was also more powerful; now Zhongli could see you weren’t kidding.

Your burn was wrapped up carefully, the doctors had managed to take the charred skin of, you’d explain, but now the burn had to be treated with the utmost care until the surgery later in the afternoon, infection was no joke.

“Well this’ll certainly be an interesting anecdote.” You let out half a laugh. “Not that I’m happy this happened, but at least this will shut up the next person who complains about how cardio was the most painful thing they’ve experienced.”

“I don’t know how you can be so cavalier about it.” Zhongli replied, tone soft and introspective. “It seems to terrifying to me, how easily humans are hurt.”

“Hey, I’ll be fine.” You assured him, voice soft but firm. “I understand how to adepti and archons and gods this might be terrifying. I’d be the first to admit we can’t really keep up with you in terms of pure healing and resistance to injury. But we’ve continued on this far haven’t we?” You smiled softly. “I promise I’m not about to die from something like a kitchen accident.”

“But what if next time it’s not your arm?” Zhongli replied. “What if it’s your neck or your chest? What if you cut yourself too deeply, what if your cut becomes infected. There are so many things I haven’t thought about until now, so many things that could hurt you. It frightens me terribly.”

“I’m very grateful that you’re worrying for me like this. But Zhongli?” You waited for his eyes to meet yours, smiling once more when he faced you. “You cannot be consumed by your anxiety. Believe me humans worry about these kinds of things. What if I tripped and fell and broke my neck, what if I scratched myself and developed and infection, what if I choked on an apple? These fears live with us, sometimes constantly, but we cannot let them consume us. As much as I’m flattered and glad you care for my wellbeing so much, I also don’t want you consumed by it, nor do I want to be treated like glass.”

“I cannot understand how you’re so resilient.” Zhongli replied after a short pause. You shrugged.

“We are because we must be.”

Zhongli knew in his heart that these fears he harbored weren’t going to go away. He knew that they were going to become more and more apparent through the month of your initial recovery, and through the longer period too as scar tissue formed and subsided.

Humans were indeed fragile. But if there was one thing stronger than said fragility it was their even greater determination to supersede it. Humans may be fragile in body, but they were stronger in spirit even than the gods.

That was something Zhongli wasn’t going to forget. Not for a very long time.

[letarasstuff]

Making the Voice quieter

(A/N): This was requested by an anon. I hope you like it!

Summary: Spencer finds out about his daughter's eating disorder, he will he react?

Warnings: Angst, discription of an eating disorder (bulemia to be more specific), discription of (binge) eating, bad body image, self hatred, abuse of pills (diet pills)

Wordcount: 2.2k

✨Masterlist✨

______________________________

Prison. Cat. Diana. All those things happened close to each other. Luckily a few months have passed since then and slowly everything settles down. Spencer is able to get his feelings sorted through, processing the events.

Ever since his imprisonment he follows a more or less strict routine, given the uncertainty coming with his job. Spencer still tries to keep it up. So is every Friday dedicated to buying the majority of groceries and needed non food articles.

Sometimes (Y/N) tags along, other days she already has plans with her friends. Her father doesn’t mind it much, he is happy to see her socializing with people her age. The two of them have one father-daughter-night in the week anyways.

“Sweetheart, I’m heading out! Did you put everything you need on the list?” He shouts into the apartment. A faint “Yes! Love you!” echoes back to him. A smile forms on the doctor’s face. Oh how he longed to hear those words from her every night while he laid in his bed, locked up for a crime he didn’t commit. “Alright, love you, too!”

Meanwhile her father has to deal with Karens being their ignorant selfs, (Y/N) is under the biggest stress she has ever been. The end of her sophomore year and suddenly every teacher thinks it’s alright to give the students a load of work in every single class.

It’s beginning to get to her head. Four essays, three projects and studying for two tests and everything is due next week. She can see herself sitting at that very desk for the whole weekend, trying to contain control of her current situation.

As (Y/N) begins to read the page in front of her again to pull any information from it, it feels like her brain shuts down. Only one thought possesses her. One thing that can assure her, make her happy again.

Her body moves automatically, into the kitchen to the fridge. Her hands grab what they can. Puddings, yogurts, bananas, apples, last night’s dinner, everything that she can carry. Then the teenager sits down at the floor and devours everything she just got out. (Y/N) doesn’t stop until she gets to this intense feeling of being full.

It seems like she snaps out of a trance. Upon seeing what she ate in the shortest time, the girl feels even worse. Quickly she tries to destroy any kind of evidence, getting the trash out, making the fridge appear more full than it is, anything.

In her panicked state she remembers the small container of pills in her room. Relief washes over (Y/N), thinking everything will be better. She takes two of them for good measurement.

With the relief also guilt takes over. What just happened wasn’t normal. But (Y/N) tells herself that she can stop any time she wants. It’s not like she is sick or something, everything is fine. It’s just her way to copy stress. A way she discovered while her father was in prison. The diet pills help her to undo her mistakes. Someone from her friend group, who is already 18, got her them from the doctor for a fair price.

Feeling calmer now, the teenager sits back at her desk. A new perception of control helps her to continue her school work. She has to get done as much as possible, because in not even half an hour (Y/N)’s best friend will be the toilet.

Spencer is completely obvious to it. Sure, he is a profiler and he noticed his daughter’s new view on eating healthy food and working out. He just assumes that (Y/N) and her friends are on a healthy trip and he doesn’t see a problem in this. On the contrary, he is happy that she wants to be good to herself and her body.

But as the weeks go on, a suspicious feeling captures him. “(Y/N)? Why is the fridge nearly empty? We got groceries last Friday and it’s only Tuesday. Did you have a party over here while I was away on the case?” Spencer enters his daughter’s room, trying to joke about it.

(Y/N) freezes. Of course she isn’t able to say that the food went bad and she threw them away, her father is meticulous regarding this subject, always checking the best before day date. “Uhm, please don’t be mad. But Alex, you know her, the short one with red hair, uhm her parents are on a business trip and she is not the best cook. So I brought her lunch and dinner over. I’m sorry for not telling you.” She looks down at the floor, not only to feign sadness but also to avoid his eyes.

The second the teenager talks Spencer knows there is something fishy. Her voice is higher and she fidget with her hands. But he writes it off as being nervous for not telling him. Ever since he is out of prison, it feels like his daughter is withholding something.

“It’s fine, Sweetheart. Just give me a heads-up beforehand, so I know to buy more groceries. What do you think about ordering something tonight? I heard from Luke that a small Chinese restaurant opened a few streets down. We can celebrate the end of the stressful phase in Sophomore year.”

It seems like (Y/N) is calculating something in her head. Spencer knows exactly what she thinks about. “You can forget about your calorie intake for one night. I see how much time you invest in living healthy, but we can let loose for a night together. Just some noodles with chicken or spring rolls and us trying to use chopsticks and giving up after two minutes and resorting to forks. How does that sound?”

The teenager would love to sigh, but it would only alarm her father further. “Yeah, you are right. Let us let loose. But only if I can choose the movie we watch after dinner!” (Y/N) feels bad for eating unhealthy food again. Her last binge was only yesterday and usually she tries to consume lighter things. But she has to bite into the sour apple, else her father will be more suspicious. After all, she can just stop. (Y/N) promises herself to not think about her weight, her shape or the calories she will eat.

Well yeah, no. Just after the first noodle hits her tongue, intrusive thoughts take a seat in her mind, getting settled.

‘You already look like a potato.’

‘Are you sure this is the right thing to eat?’

‘Can you really stop?’

‘Dad is going to hate you when he finds out.’

All of them and more enter her head. (Y/N) is unable to shake them off. She is fine. She doesn’t have a problem. She just doesn’t feel like eating now, that’s fine, right?

“Uhm Dad. I’m full and really tired from the day. Is it ok if I go to bed? Maybe we can rain check on that movie?” The girl asks, feeling even worse for ditching her father. Usually it’s the other way around.

“Are you feeling ok? You look a little pale. Are you sick?” Spencer fires his question canone being the borderline helicopter father he always is. “Yes, just really exhausted from all the assignment and school work. A good night's rest and I will be good as new.” (Y/N) attempts a small smile, but fails miserably at it.

“Ok, sleep tight baby. I’ll put the leftovers in the fridge for you tomorrow.” Quickly she goes into her room. The thoughts in her head scream louder and louder with each step she takes. Can she really stop? Maybe she should come clean to her father.

‘And risking him hating you? Look at you, thinking you are sane is the only thing keeping him from abandoning you. How would you explain him keeping you otherwise? It’s definitely not for your looks.’

Later that night, (Y/N) hasn’t gotten a wink of sleep because of the voices, she makes her way back to the kitchen. In an attempt to distract herself, the teenager scrolled through her social media sites. There she was met by pictures of perfect people.

Perfect bodies. Perfect lives. Perfect smiles. Perfect family. Perfect friends. Everything about them is perfect.

And then there is her. Her body is unperfect. Her life is a mess. Her smile is not that of a model. Her family is just her, her father and the people he works with. Her friends aren’t always the best associates.

The stress of not feeling enough is getting to (Y/N)’s head. Like several times before that her body goes into auto. She doesn’t control her movements, though she tells herself all of this is willently.

Like so many times before the girl goes through the fridge and eats everything up she can get her fingers on. But this time one thing is different. Her father is at home. And he isn’t a heavy sleeper.

The movement in the kitchen wakes him up. Immediately his brain jumps to a burglar or even worse, an UnSub they once arrested coming after him. Quickly he gets his revolver and sneaks through the hallway to the source of the noises. As Spencer only sees his daughter sitting there, he instantly relaxes.

“Hey Sweetheart, what are you doing up? It’s a school night”, he softly asks in order to not scare her. Still, (Y/N) gets startled at the sudden voice.

“Uhm, nothing much. Just hungry. Probably because I didn’t eat dinner”, she explains, looking at her father like he caught her with her hand stuck in the cookie jar. Spencer watches her closely. “This is it? Because from what it looks like you not only ate your dinner but also tomorrow’s breakfast and right now lunch.”

(Y/N) swallows her bite, feeling that sinking reality in her stomach. The pills. She needs the pills fast before her body begins to digest the food. “Uhm, yeah. I probably should go to bed. I need my sleep. Just let me tidy up. Good night, Dad.” But he is quick to stop her.

“(Y/N), I want you to sit down. There is something we have to talk about.” Hesitantly (Y/N) takes a seat. “What is it Dad? Are you reprimanding me for eating? I thought you wanted me to let loose for a night.”

Spencer sits, leaning against the kitchen counter. “Baby, I want you to be alright. But I think you are not.” His eyes get a sad look. “I’m alright. I am fine, Dad. What do you think is wrong with me?”

“Look, (Y/N), I don’t need to be a profiler to see that you are struggling with something. Do you want to tell me about it?” Her answer is a tight lipped smile and a “I’m fine. There is nothing to talk about.”

The father sighs. She is not leaving him much of a choice. “And what about them?” Spencer asks after getting something from the highest shelf in the kitchen, the one (Y/N) barely reaches by stepping on a stool. He sets a little container down on the table.

“Dad I-” “No (Y/N). You don’t need to explain anything. It’s my turn to talk. I found those in your room yesterday while I was looking for a book. At first I thought nothing of it, I mean you are trying to live healthy, so I thought this is part of the process. But then I saw that they have to be prescribed and I know that these aren’t yours.

“I wanted to talk about it with you anyway. But now I know that I caught you binge eating and I see all the signs. I see them and I’m sorry for not acting sooner. (Y/N), you need help and I’m here for you. I know the last few months were especially hard on you. I can’t change what was and what happened, but I will be here for you now." Tears stream down on boths their faces.

(Y/N) is stammering for words. “I-I am fine. I can stop anytime I want. Th-this was a conscious d-decision.” Her father envelops her in a hug, cradling her head to his chest. She begins to sob.

“I know, Sweetheart. It’s hard and it won’t get easier from here on, but I’m here. You know you can’t stop, it’s only an illusion your eating disorder wants you to believe. But we get through it together. You, I and the team if you want to. We take it at your pace.” By now the two are crying loudly.

“I want it to stop, Dad. Please make the voice go away.”

He can’t make it go away. No one can. But Spencer helps to quiet it. Together they tackle the disorder, through the good and the bad times. He takes off from work for a time and (Y/N) out of school for a few weeks to be able to work on it together, to make the voice quieter and her life better.

Taglist:

All works:

@dindjarinsspouse

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch @ash19871962

[brooklynislandgirl]

Even blind-folded Beth would recognise that smile, almost hear it in her own way, absolutely feel it miles away. It's the smile that holds things back, the words and ideas that Peter isn't sure he can say aloud and make any sense, or worse, the ones that he knows will cause someone to feel hurt or disappointed. It's therefore crucial that she pays attention to the ones that do come out so that she can hear them correctly and be able to parse out later. She nods. Oh she understands, all right, and she could add a few other things to that imbalance. Peter might think magick is cool in stories, but does he know that just knowing she could cast spells meant she was tempting the universe to punish her for it? The fact that she is a witch, and Andy, too? That's a secret she's never tried to burden him with. How could she? "Yeah. Get dat." She stops herself at just that. It isn't really the right time to interject and it feels like this pause is significant, as if he's casting around to find the place that he can draw the strength or comfort to tell her, or tell her the aftermath of some secret he has already shared. It feels more uncomfortable than drying sand trapped inside of your rash-guard, though she can't put her finger quite on it. Maybe because he's caressing all of her without a single touch. And then it all comes out, swallowing her like a barrel that's broken over her head and she can't out surf it.

Of course something happened to him. There are still moments that she wakes up and thinks about inviting Uncle Ben to lunch or some other silly thing because he's easier to talk to than Andy. And if she's honest, her brother, Peter, and his uncle are really the only friends she's got. And then she remembers some vicious and frightened animal robbed the world of Ben Parker. No one mourns him more than Peter. Maybe not even Auntie May. She cannot imagine what it would be like to carry around the pain and guilt the way he does, so of course he's changed. She doesn't think she'd survive it if anything happened to Andy. Absently, she makes the Sign of the Cross for even thinking about such a thing. She doesn't say that he hasn't lost her. He hasn't, but maybe she hasn't been as good a friend as she could have been. Not when the shadow of Gwen Stacy has overcast their friendship. She's always known that Peter couldn't be hers forever. That some day their lives would diverge like a Robert Frost poem. She just thought that maybe there'd be more time. But then again, there's got to be something she's not just wishfully overthinking here, if he's come to her and not anyone else. It's almost too much to think that he's come to his senses and he finally realises all the things she's never been able to say to him. An idea that he murders at its inception when he tells her that he needs his best friend. And in that very second, she realises how very selfish she's being. Not a very good friend at all And just like that, she pushes away and down all of her own self-pity for the sake of the boy that's always tried to the same for her. She girds herself in her own imagined armour and gets ready to battle whatever demons have come up to muster on his emotional doorstep. It isn't exactly like she is a Koa warrior but she can maybe mend fences and give him some kind of peace of mind, and maybe that's all that Peter really needs right now. As their fingers brush, she turns her wrist and captures his digits between hers and her palm, silently offering him comfort and strength and maybe a bit of the affection she's held onto when he started dating, thinking maybe he didn't need it any more. Likewise, she offers him a sympathetic gaze and a soft but encouraging smile, one that is a little lop-sided as any of hers have ever been. After a moment, she lets go and instead slides her arm around his back so that her nails reach for his side, just above his hip. "Bes' good friend reporting, front and centre," she says with a gruff little tone, almost as though she were mocking Andy or teasing Peter, but she means it. "Anyt'ing you say in dis sanctum of secret kine stays between us, you have my word on dat. However, if it's somet'ing lame? I reserve da right t' make fun of you about it forever. Jus' need to put dat out dere."

@brooklynislandgirl (continued from here)

The things that Beth says make complete sense to Peter, and he minorly hates that they do. He's spent a long time trying to say them to himself until his complexion had, at varying times, found its way to both ends of the spectrum adorning the suit. She's not wrong. It ought to be as simple as she lays it out to be. Moreover, keeping a secret this big… in time, it would eat anybody alive.

He has an airtight reason keeping it from Aunt May. Nothing in the world will ever pry his jaws open to tell her what it is. He's seen the look in her eye every day since It Happened. How much she misses Uncle Ben. He's even seen those moments she's tried to hide, where she would glance up as if to call Ben's name or start talking like he was sitting right there.

No. There's no telling her, and there never will be.

He'd found a way to tell Gwen… without really saying it out loud. And why was that? Why had he been so desperate to tell her, when her father was the chief of police? It had put Gwen into an absolutely impossible position. It hadn't been fair of him to put that on her shoulders.

Her father's dying wish had been for Peter to stay away from Gwen. To keep her out of his superhero antics. And ever since that moment, he's been trying. All summer long, he's steered clear of her and her family. But that was never going to take the pain of loss away from them… and Gwen still carries the burden of Peter's secret, when pain and anger could give her every reason she needs to out him to the world.

Knowing who and what he is hadn't been the cause of Captain Stacy's death. But being who and what he is… that's most surely the cause of his separation from Gwen now.

His lips tremble up into a half-smile. "You know what the problem with asking someone to keep a secret is… is that, before you tell it to them, they can't understand how important it is. And after you tell them, they don't have the option to not know it. There's no taking it back. There's just… living with it."

His eyes cast about the interior of the blanket fort, peering at each detail in turn but never fully settling on any of them, as though he might be able to find an answer to his own question amongst her treasures. It's a disparate array, items to please the eye, soothe the touch, and enchant the soul. Articles that speak to her past and her future, her penchant for fantastical whimsy and her aptitude for bio-science.

They're both surrounded by all the things that she adores, finds comfort and safety in. And Peter knows better than to deny that he himself is one of those things… and as he peers through that lens, as his eyes settle on Beth's face and he sees a war of hope versus dread in her eyes… his heart aches. He's let her down in so many ways she doesn't even know, by not being honest with her.

Some best friend he is.

His eyes drift shut and his brow wrinkles.

The dam cracks. Words seep through like water.

"Something happened to me. And, uh… one way or another, I've been losing people I care about ever since. I wanna be honest with you." He swallows. "I'm… I'm just afraid I'm gonna lose you, too."

He pours all of his effort into releasing his death grip on his bottle, and shifts his hand to brush his fingertips across her knuckles. When they were smaller kids, they'd held hands frequently. Nowadays, it has a different connotation, and he doesn't want her to get the wrong impression… but maybe, he thinks, maybe it'll allow them both to recall their inseparability of those days. The strength of their friendship.

"And I really need my best friend."

[jgoose13]

The following is a preview for the first chapter of a Kathony fic I'm working on. It's as yet untitled, but it's the Bodyguard AU.

Hope you enjoy the little sneak peek! Forgive errors, as I have yet to finish and have it beta read.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Memories flicker.

A little girl in pigtails, shrieking from merciless tickling. 

A woman with a kind smile, more a mother than the mother that had birthed her. 

Slow Saturday mornings spent watching television, the loud boisterous laugh of a man that was the little girl’s whole world. 

Kate. 

It’s her father’s voice. Her name said in that way she knew he was proud of her. 

Kate.

It’s her father’s voice, again. Her name, said in that way she knew he was disappointed in her.

“Kate.”

Her eyes blinked, momentarily confused. The voice was feminine now, jarring her from those distant memories and back into reality.

“Where’d you go just now?”

“I’m sorry, I… I just spaced for a second…” 

“Something you want to bring up? To talk about?” 

“I was thinking about my father.” 

“Go on.” 

Kate Sharma sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. She could feel a headache forming behind her eyes. 

“I was thinking about… about how he loved American television shows.” 

Dr. Laura Cho nodded, her legs crossed at the knee, a pad and pen cradled in her lap. “I do love a good episode of NCIS now and again.” 

A wry smile tugged at Kate’s mouth. “He loved the classics. The A-Team, Golden Girls, Hogan’s Heroes… but he loved M*A*S*H the best.” 

Dr. Cho hummed in understanding. “That one is definitely a classic.” 

“He could never get enough of it. I lost count of the amount of times he watched the whole series through. I never got why. Not until I grew up. Not until I lost him. Not until I lived, and learned.”

The psychologist’s lips pursed for a moment, before setting aside the notepad and pen. “Your dad was important to you. It is perfectly normal for something like this to stick with you. Was there a particular episode or scene you had in mind?”

If only Dr. Cho knew. The amount of times Kate had thought of this one scene. For so many years.

“Hawkeye,” Kate said, her eyes flitting from Dr. Cho to a space on the wall over the doctor’s shoulder. “Alan Alda. There’s this exchange between him and Burns, Hunnicut, and Father Mulcahy. He said: ‘War is war and hell is hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell. War is chock full of them - little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for some of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander’.”

Once upon a time, a young woman named Kathani Sharma went off to war. And that was where she learned. All those innocent bystanders, collateral damage. It was in moments when she woke in a cold sweat, like that very morning, heart racing, fear gripping her like a fist around her throat, that she felt every single word of that exchange. When she knew, to her very core, just how much war had fucked her up. An innocent bystander.

“Kate,” Dr. Cho said. Something about her tone made Kate meet the doctor’s eyes. There was something there that made her squirm. That made her uncomfortable. It was knowing. Understanding. “Go ahead and say it.” 

Kate swallowed thickly, sweat beading at the back of her neck and along her forehead, palms growing damp as she idly rubbed them against her jeans. 

“My father would be ashamed of me.” 

“And why would you think that, Kate?”

It took some time for her to answer. The lump of guilt that’s always lodged in her throat, choking her. 

“He was the gentlest man. He was barely able to kill bugs in our house. He’d always capture them and set them outside. He might have watched war movie after war movie, but he abhorred violence.” Kate paused, sucking in a breath. “If he knew the things I’d done…”

“Kate, we’ve been seeing each other now for two years. You’ve told me many things about your family.  But you know what stuck out the most to me about your dad? It was the story of how he got here. To England. About how much he sacrificed to leave his home and everyone he knew in search of better opportunities for himself. You said he was very proud of everything he’d accomplished. Of being able to provide for his family. To make a home here. I find it hard to believe, however misguided the machinations of war might be, that he’d be ashamed of you, serving and protecting your country and the people you love.” 

Kate knew Dr. Cho was right. The logic was sound. But that little voice inside of her, the one that had been with her for as long as she could remember, reasoned against it.

“Let’s pick this up next week, yeah? Before I let you go, I want to ask how work is going?”

“Work is fine. It’s good,” and for once Kate wasn’t deflecting. 

Dr. Cho nodded. “And your sleep?” 

Kate’s heart lurched. “About the same.” 

“Anytime you feel you need something, we can get Dr. Thornton to prescribe sleep aids. But as always, it’s up to you.” 

“Thanks again for meeting with me early, doc. I’ll see you next week.” 

Kate unfolded herself from the chair she felt nailed to, and shakily made her way out of Dr. Cho’s office.