#working on receiving constructive feedback as an avoidant person

[irrec]

If you don't

send me messages telling me how much you appreciate me and love spending time with me after we hang out- pls leave me alone.

getting older means realizing that allll of your relationships are a choice that you have to keep making.

I love reminding my people why I'll always choose them, unconditionally.

[uceyliyahh]

MAIN ONE

summary: you are his main one, the person who he can call just to blow off some steam when him and his girl get into it.

warnings contain: manipulation, oral(m receiving), gaslighting, cheating, entitlement, unprotected sex, breeding.

word count: 2.5k

AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.

smut warning: it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good a writing ✍🏽 smuts but I am improving at the moment.

Jimmy Uso x Blanca

comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍

again mdni you have been warned.

TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️ @pinkwithhearts @420days @jstarr86 @empressdede @angiedawn02 @biancasreign @prettyfilmz @sharmelasworld @spiicii @formulafortyfour @theusotwinzcom @mingisfavgf

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@charmed-dreamssss @fearlesschimera @partypoison00 @mselenalovebug @bloodlinesbabe93 @justazzi @xbriexx @luvrsluxe @celesteheartsjey @4milly @luuvprincess @yyaktayak @yana3sworld @shanthefemalerapper @bloodlineslut @bookuce @sheaabuttaababyy @li-da-savage

𝕆𝕟𝕖

“Open yo’ throat up some more for me baby.” Jimmy let out a low grunt as he moved in and out, captivated by the sight of her taking him fully into her throat, stretching it further to accommodate him.

Jimmy reached out to her in the late hours, expressing his need to unwind after a trivial spat with his girlfriend over a silly issue. He felt the urge to talk to Blanca.

Blanca attempted to turn him down, but he constantly insisted that they were meant for each other, claiming he would break up with his girlfriend for her. He skillfully manipulated her into allowing him to visit late at night, and she naively fell for his charm.

As he continued to push deeper into her mouth, Justine kept her eyes shut, avoiding looking at him. This made him clutch her hair even more firmly. “Look up at me baby, lemme’ see how good I’m fucking that pretty face of yours,” her puppy eyes looked up at him swirling her tongue around the head of his dick.

“Mhmm, just like that mama. you can take some more inches can you?” Blanca formed her lips into an 'o' as he continued to push deeper into her inviting mouth.

He pushed deeper into her mouth, letting drool spill from her lips to the floor as he held her gaze. He could feel her cheeks sink in and her tongue explore him, prompting him to throw his head back in delight.

Jimmy bit the back of his lip and gazed down at her with his dark, hungry eyes as he drove his dick farther up her throat, almost forming a barrier. After adjusting the angle by tilting her head, he pushed his hips forward and slid past her throat's curve.

She took him in her mouth, feeling a rush of heat that made her momentarily gag. As his fullness pressed against her throat, she felt his weight resting against her chin, which eased her tension and allowed him to slide deeper.

Blanca realized that it was inappropriate for them to act behind his girlfriend's back. He should have been at home talking things over with her instead of coming here to disturb her.

She was aware that his girlfriend had spotted her a few times while she was working as a bartender, serving drinks to customers and earning generous tips—that's how she first encountered Jimmy.

From the instant their gazes met during their first encounter, he sensed the rhythm of their connection. What began with a simple exchange of phone numbers quickly escalated, leading to a passionate rendezvous in the bathroom, causing him to completely overlook his girlfriend.

Often, he would drop his girlfriend off at work before heading over to visit Blanca at her job in the morning.

It was a mess and she knew it was a mess.

The air in the room was thick with his groans and crude, profane language spilling from his lips like a seasoned sailor.

“Such a good girl for me mama, you goin’ to eat this nut up for daddy?” He grunted as Blanca nodded her head obeying him.

He found a pleasing rhythm as he thrust into her throat, seeking his pleasure, and the delightful sound of her gurgling around him brought a smirk to his lips.

She inhaled deeply through her nose to steady herself as Jimmy took her from behind. She focused on relaxing her throat, aware that each involuntary clench only heightened his excitement.

Blanca experienced a rush of sensations as he pressed against her throat, her body responding eagerly with warmth and desire. Tears flowed down her face, mingling with the drool that trickled onto her chest.

The view through his eyes was truly breathtaking. “you’re fucking pretty like this baby.” he moaned out feeling his dick twitching inside of her mouth.

His balls tighten as he furiously fucks her throat in, and when he notices perspiration running down his face, his rhythm stops. For him and him alone, her throat becomes the perfect cock sleeve.

He thrust into her, driving himself deeper into her throat as his warm essence filled her completely, prompting her to swallow every drop. A deep, satisfying moan slipped from his lips.

Jimmy withdrew from her mouth, noticing her tear-streaked face, a chaotic display of emotion. Gently, he wiped her tears with his thumb before sliding it back into her mouth.

She nursed it gently, her eyes locked onto his, remaining on her knees like a devoted puppy, eager to please him and avoid any displeasure.

He gently withdrew his thumb from her mouth, cradling her chin as he gazed at her beautiful face.

“So fucking beautiful.” Jimmy said.

Blanca managed a strained smile as she rose from her knees, which were starting to ache. She tidied herself up, brushing away the dried drool from the corner of her mouth before turning to walk away.

Jimmy grasped her arm, his eyes brimming with pure lust and longing, fully aware that his intentions with her were far from over.

“Where you goin little mama?” He questioned her.

She raised an eyebrow at him looking confused, “I’m finna head to bed Jim what you mean?”

“What I mean? I didn’t say we was done here, come ride this dick for me over on that fucking couch I still got some steam to blow off.” She attempted to resist, but he seized her by the throat, forcefully pressing his lips against hers.

The kiss was intense and passionate as he hoisted her up by her thighs, guiding her toward the couch. She found herself straddling him, acutely aware of his arousal, eager for their bodies to connect.

Jimmy wasted no time positioning himself at her entrance, a shared moan escaping their lips. With his hands resting on her hips, he guided her movements as she swayed gently on his lap. He watched intently as her breasts swayed with each motion, giving her the chance to adjust to his cock.

She discovered her rhythm as she moved her hips on his lap, while he adorned her neck and cheek with gentle, lingering kisses—whispering enticing words in her ear that were unlike anything she had ever experienced from a man of his caliber.

“Look at you baby, coating up my dick so well. Feels so fucking warm in here.” Jimmy groaned.

Blanca could only let out soft whimpers as waves of ecstasy washed over her, her body igniting with warmth from the inside as his low, gravelly voice caressed her ear.

He marked her neck with hickies, a clear sign of possession—he was confident that Blanca was not going to leave him.

“This my fucking pussy huh? you mines right?” 

Blanca was too overwhelmed to reply as his cock expertly brushed against her g-spot, leaving her speechless and unable to articulate a response to his question. A playful slap on her backside made her let out a soft whimper.

Her mind was a swirl of confusion and fog. "Words, mama, words," Jimmy urged as he thrust deeply inside her, eliciting a gasp from her lips.

“Fuckkk yes I’m yours Jimmy I’m yours.” As the heat in the room intensified, he pressed her hips against him, playfully giving her a few light smacks on her ass.

“Keep bouncing on this dick baby, make me nut.” She obeyed, biting her lower lip as she hurried her steps, the sounds of their moans and groans echoing throughout the living room.

The air was alive with the sound of their bodies meeting—Jimmy's hand slid down to hold her hips, guiding her as she swayed in sync with him.

A burning sensation ignited in her thighs as she rode him harder, craving that blissful release. Jimmy's fingers dug into the tender curves of her backside, guiding her movements with each forceful thrust.

He skillfully navigated her tender depths, leaving her gasping for air, as if she were witnessing a dazzling display of stars. The warmth of her desire surrounded him, creating a seamless flow as he glided in and out with ease.

“J-Jimmy! O-oh! F-fuckk.” Blanca moaned loudly.

“Gimme this shit.” Jimmy grunted.

She caught his gaze, fully aware that what she saw mirrored in his eyes was pure longing. Her body reacted on its own, a wave of excitement coursing through her as he moved closer, his presence rhythmically igniting sensations deep inside her, brushing against her cervix and making her walls clench around him.

“I can’t t-take i-it…f-fuckk..I-I.” She was stumbling hard on her words as his powerful thrust left her in shambles.

“You can fucking take it, don’t tap out on me.” He was so aggressive and possessive that he owned her.

She began to move her hips in a rhythmic motion, relishing the feeling of him deeply inside her, which made him lean back against the couch in delight. “Shit, Bia. That’s it girl keep doing that shit.” He groaned.

She continued to sway her hips, letting the tip of him graze her core—clutching his shoulders firmly as she gave in to the experience, feeling as if she were melting into him. A surge of feeling enveloped her, causing a flutter in her stomach while her thighs quivered.

“I’m finna cum…I’m finna cum…” Blanca emitted a gentle whimper as his strong arms wrapped around her waist, their bodies pressed closely together, rendering her unable to move. He started to thrust upward from beneath, providing deep, rhythmic movements that caused her to call out his name.

Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck as he moved within her, sending her into a sea of bliss. With her eyes fluttering in sheer delight, she sensed her body tremble around him, instinctively tightening in reaction to his rhythm.

“Look how perfect we are for each other baby girl, me and you. Us against the world.” He cooed, His hips maintained a consistent rhythm as he slid his hand down to push her panties aside, granting himself even greater access.

Words slipped away from her as she fought to express her thoughts, becoming increasingly disoriented while he kept shifting beneath her. . “yes, u-us against the w-world.” she managed to gasp out between thrusts.

She felt her peak building stronger with every thrust, the pressure against her cervix creating ripples of ecstasy that made her head spin.

The sight of Jimmy's member cloaked in a soft white glow made him feel dizzy. “I know baby girl, I know. Keep taking this dick for me.” He kissed her neck gently as she whimpered at the feeling.

She couldn’t take it anymore, “oh my godddd! J-jimmyy!”  She let out a cry as she descended upon him one last time, an overwhelming feeling surging through her like a powerful tide. Her essence enveloped him, soaking his lap in a warm stream, akin to a river bursting with life.

He looked down at the delightful mess she had made of him, her head nestled against his chest as he pushed his hips upward, chasing his peak. His hands gripped her backside tightly, penetrating her soft depths, each thrust accompanied by the wet, squelching sounds of their connection.

As his actions became more frantic and intense, he felt himself slipping away—on the brink of insanity while being consumed by her presence.

“I’m finna bust all in yo’ shit baby.” Jimmy Growled.

Jimmy drove into her one final time, filling her completely as waves of his thick release surged within her, eliciting a deep moan from his lips. He continued to thrust upward, ensuring that she received every last drop of his essence.

He withdrew from her, his erection resting on his stomach as they both gasped for breath. Blanca was astonished that she had allowed this man to climax inside her.

Jimmy had kissed her on the lips feeling satisfied that he got all of that out.

“You came inside of me?” Blanca asked.

“Yeah shawty, don’t worry imma get you a plan b tomorrow morning so we can prevent having babies.” She attempted to rise from his lap, but her legs felt like jelly, unsteady and weak, as if he had struck a nerve deep within her.

He chuckled at her, “I gotchu baby.” Jimmy guided her up the stairs to her bedroom, gently opening the door before setting her down on the bed.

She remained seated, the quiet stretching between them until he finally broke the stillness with his words. “what time do you clock in tomorrow?” Now why was he asking her this?

“Around eight in the morning, why?” 

“Imma come pick you up and drop you off of work after I take her to work of course.” What made him so nonchalant about cheating on his girlfriend without her knowledge?

Blanca shook her head trying to deny him, “I’m good I can drive myself to work Jim.” She said.

Jimmy could feel her attempts to distance herself from him, fully aware that she was not going anywhere.

“Don’t do that shit Bia, it’s us against the world remember?”

“You don’t think this is wrong? Cheating on your girlfriend with me? Because I know this is wrong, it's not right.”

“So? She doesn’t need to know, baby, she doesn’t need to know that you’re my main one.” His main one, the person who he could call just to blow off some steam and then leave afterwards it was sickening.

“But it’s so wrong Jim and you know that.” Blanca protested while folding her arms.

Jimmy was indifferent to her words; he had little concern for his girlfriend, fully aware that it was him and Blanca against the world, and nothing could come between them.

“Look, don't worry about her aight? Just worry about what we got goin okay? I gotta get back before she start trippin’” With that, Jimmy pressed a gentle kiss to her temple before stepping out the door and shutting it softly behind him.

Blanca fell back onto her bed, staring at the ceiling as thoughts swirled in her mind about how her life might have changed if she hadn’t handed him her phone number that fateful night at the bar. Now, she found herself in a complicated situation.

She lies here, contemplating her next move while grappling with the inner demons that torment her mind.

Struggling to comprehend the dynamics of the situation between her and him.

At that moment, she noticed her phone buzzing, prompting her to pick it up from the small dresser and check a message from Jimmy.

SlimJim🫠💦 sent a message.

SlimJim🫠💦: us against the world baby girl 💗

Was it really going to be them against the world?

Main One

a/n: I just honestly got inspired by my girl Cleo 🫶🏽 @4milly just wanted to give y’all something short but trust it’s going to be wayyy longer.

Lmk how yall feel about this in the comments below 

STAY UCEY.

𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭

[physalian]

The Dos and Don’ts of Giving and Receiving Constructive Criticism

Some of these should be painfully obvious and yet. They come from experience.

Receiving feedback:

Do

Understand that a criticism of a character’s thoughts, actions, morality, and choices are likely not a criticism of you as an author, unless the character is an author insert

Understand that they are being paid to critique how successfully you told an entertaining story, not pander to your trauma dumping

Understand that critiquing a book’s success as an entertaining story means that how much you yourself connect with or love a character or scene or plotline is irrelevant if it doesn’t make a compelling narrative

You might have written your book for yourself. Your editor is a different person with their own human biases and perspectives. If you just want to pay someone to stoke your ego, make that 100% clear up front.

Stand up for yourself and clarify where necessary if some details were overlooked or if explaining outside the narrative can better contextualize anything confusing or lacking detail.

Stand up for yourself in what feedback you are expecting, and what degree of criticism you’re willing to endure. An editor can let more or less of their own views show depending on what you ask for.

Stand up for yourself if your editor delivers inadequate or useless feedback. You’re paying them for a job, and you deserve to have it done properly.

Try to separate dislike of a book from dislike of yourself. It’s not easy, but the goal is to fix your book that you’ve already spent a lot of time writing, and they’re only trying to help.

Remember that your author insert is subjected to the same level of criticism as any other character, and that you asked for this.

Keep an open mind and be prepared for feedback that you don’t like, because you can’t please everyone. Your editor should be able to tell you whether or not a scene or character, or plotline works separate from their own personal tastes.

Don’t

Argue with your editor over their religiosity or lack thereof and insist that adhering to genre expectations means they “worship the god of [genre]”. (really, argue with your editor over anything like this, e.g. their own sexuality, religiosity, gender, socioeconomic status).

Argue with your editor while still expecting more work from them as if your aggression will in any way positively impact their perception of your book.

Insult your editor’s intelligence for not understanding your jargon and attempts to sound smarter than you are.

Get mad when your editor sees right through your BS and calls it like they see it, specifically your self-insert Mary Sue protagonist.

Insist that the solution to better understanding your book is for that editor to do extensive homework on your niche topic. If it’s a niche book for niche audiences, hire an editor who’s already knowledgeable about that niche topic.

Equate a bad review and opinion of the book with unprofessionalism. These can overlap, but they are not interchangeable.

Forget that your book is probably meant for leisure and entertainment, and your audience is under no obligation to read “until it gets good,” when they can go do literally anything else. Your first job is to entertain, if you write fiction.

Giving Feedback:

Do

Pay attention to your client’s wants and needs and expectations. If they’re more sensitive to bad feedback, do your best and stay as objective as possible. You can’t please everyone, either.

Helpful feedback includes an explanation of why an element needs work and how it can be improved. Saying “I hate this” with nothing else helps no one and just makes the author feel bad with no direction of how to make it better.

Communicate beforehand how much of your own personality your author wants from you. Do they like personal opinions and your personal reactions to the text, or do they want it as impersonal as possible and solely focused on the structure of the narrative? This might avoid a mess.

Remember to leave notes of where things worked well to balance the criticism. Even a simple “this is good” highlighting a line or a paragraph or two helps keep authors motivated to keep writing. I firmly believe that no book is completely unsalvageable.

Make it painfully clear with no room for debate that criticism of a character is not criticism of the author, unless it's an author insert, in which case the author absolutely asked for it.

Make it clear that you are just one person and these are all suggestions, not laws.

Don’t

Let your own personal opinions cloud your judgment of whether or not someone with different tastes could enjoy the book.

Unless given permission, get too personal with the narrative and reach beyond what’s written on the page.

Do more than what you’re paid for. You’re an editor, not a therapist for the writer’s trauma dumping.

Forget to wrap up all your thoughts in a condensed format that the author can reference, as opposed to endlessly scrolling through the manuscript trying to summarize your points for you.

Walk away with absolutely nothing positive to say about the manuscript. Even if it’s awful on every front, the writer still tried and that deserves merit.

This is from my personal experience beta and sensitivity reading, and dealing with other beta and sensitivity readers. We are all human and these jobs are not one-size-fits-all and there aren’t really hardline rules as every author, editor, and manuscript is different with different needs.

Just some things to keep in mind.

But also, for the authors who do write self-insert Mary Sues: You are in for a very rude awakening if you expect anyone other than yourself to adore your book with zero criticism. If you really just want someone to proofread and look for typos, tell them.

[bisexualamy]

the irony of all of these armchair critics online offering "feedback" or "constructive/critical critique" is they demonstrate that they've never been in a productive critique environment. i feel like a lot of folks assume critique is supposed to be brutal or crushing or "tough love" when that's often not the case.

one of the first lessons you learn as a creative person receiving regular crit is to separate yourself as a person from the work you create. the point is that you don't feel personally attacked when someone criticizing an aspect of your work. the goal of crit is to improve the work. everyone is supposed to leave crit with something to fix, a direction to go in, a piece of feedback they can work with to make something better.

i've been in many critique environments where the word "you" isn't permitted. you're not allow to address the writer/artist/creator directly, because it's not about them, it's about their work. instead of saying "you portrayed [x] minority experience in a racist way with little nuance" you'd say "I think this story portrays [x] minority experience without nuance and falls into racist tropes. Here's an example or two of where I saw that. I suggest you [get a sensitivity reader/research this topic further/familiarize yourself with racists tropes so you can avoid them.]"

the problem with a lot of critique online, the reason it creates a toxic environment, is because it's all framed as a personal attack and there's no constructive element for the creator to take with them. "do better" isn't feedback. "you're homophobic for writing this" isn't feedback. they're personal attacks. personal attacks are incompatible with artistic critique.

[jane-alma]

Advice for dealing with writer’s block, from a fellow writer

Okay, so I think we can all agree that writer's block sucks. And if you're someone who writes regularly, there's no way to avoid experiencing it from time to time (I sure know I do). But here are a few things that I usually find helpful when I experience writer’s block <3

Firstly, give yourself permission to take a break. Sometimes, the harder we push ourselves to write, the more elusive inspiration becomes. Step away from your writing for a little while and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. This could be anything from going for a walk, reading a book, or indulging in a hobby. By taking time to recharge, you allow your mind to reset and open up to new ideas. Sometimes it can be an longer break that is needed, sometimes the best way to get back into writing if you have a really bad case of writer’s block is to simply not try.

Another useful technique is to try freewriting. Set a timer for a specific duration, it can be as short as 10-15 minutes (personally, I prefer setting my timer for about half an hour to 45 minutes when I do this), and write continuously without worrying about grammar, punctuation, or structure. Let your thoughts flow freely onto the page. This exercise can help loosen up your creative muscles and break through any mental barriers. If you know that you have a tendency to overthink or be overly self critical when you write, I suggest avoiding a time duration longer than 30 minutes, at least the first times you do this exercise.

If you find yourself stuck on a particular project, consider working on something completely different. Switching gears and exploring a new topic or genre can provide a fresh perspective and alleviate the pressure you may be putting on yourself. Experimenting with different writing styles or formats can also help reignite your passion for storytelling.

Collaboration can be another effective way to overcome writer's block. Engage in writing exercises with fellow writers or seek feedback from trusted peers. Sharing your work-in-progress and receiving constructive criticism can often provide valuable insights and new directions for your writing.

Lastly, it's important to remember that writer's block is a natural part of the creative process. Be patient and kind to yourself. Avoid self-criticism and negative self-talk. Instead, focus on nurturing your creativity through self-care, reading, and exploring new experiences. Trust that inspiration will return in its own time.

And most importantly of all, be kind to yourself. We are usually our own biggest critic. Happy writing! <3

[aeth-eris]

Venus Square Transits

Venus Square Sun: This transit may bring about conflicts between personal desires and relationship needs. Focus on fostering open communication and mutual understanding within your relationships. Strive to find a balance between self-expression and compromise, and prioritize maintaining harmony and respect in your interactions.

Venus Square Moon: This transit can intensify emotional fluctuations and create challenges in finding emotional stability. Practice self-awareness and mindfulness to manage your emotional reactions, and prioritize open and honest communication within your relationships. Aim to foster a supportive and nurturing environment that encourages emotional understanding and empathy.

Venus Square Mercury: This transit may lead to misunderstandings and communication challenges. Focus on fostering clarity and empathy in your interactions, ensuring that you listen actively and express yourself diplomatically. Prioritize effective communication and mutual respect, and be open to constructive feedback to resolve any potential conflicts or misunderstandings.

Venus Square Mars: This transit may trigger conflicts and power struggles in relationships. Practice patience and understanding to navigate potential tensions, and prioritize constructive communication and mutual compromise. Aim to channel any passionate energy into productive and cooperative activities, fostering a sense of shared goals and mutual respect within your relationships.

Venus Square Jupiter: This transit may lead to conflicts between practicality and indulgence. Practice moderation and realistic goal-setting to manage expectations within your relationships. Foster a sense of gratitude and humility, and be mindful of maintaining a balanced approach to both giving and receiving support and affection.

Venus Square Saturn: This transit can bring about challenges in relationship commitments and responsibilities. Focus on fostering patience and understanding, and prioritize open communication to address any underlying tensions or insecurities. Aim to build a strong foundation of trust and reliability within your relationships, and be willing to work through any challenges together with maturity and dedication.

Venus Square Uranus: This transit may lead to sudden changes and disruptions in relationships. Practice flexibility and adaptability to navigate unexpected developments, and foster open communication to address any need for personal space and independence. Aim to find a balance between individuality and togetherness, fostering mutual respect and understanding within your relationships.

Venus Square Neptune: This transit can create challenges in maintaining boundaries and realistic expectations within relationships. Practice clarity and honesty to avoid misunderstandings and potential deceptions, and prioritize building a foundation of trust and emotional authenticity. Aim to foster a sense of empathy and understanding while maintaining a realistic perspective in your relationships.

Venus Square Pluto: This transit may trigger intense power dynamics and emotional transformations within relationships. Focus on fostering open and honest communication to address any underlying issues and power struggles. Prioritize mutual respect and trust, and be willing to confront and work through any deep-seated emotional issues with compassion and understanding.

[diamondcitydarlin]

re: that post about hypothetical 'dislike' buttons on fics and mean/critical reviews, I started writing fic in the early 00's when the general etiquette of 'reviewing' was that everyone was entitled to be as openly critical of fanfics as they liked bc the writer 'deserved' it for writing something like a female self-insert OC ('Mary Sue', any female OC was synonymous with that for awhile, and for some haters out there that's still the case) and/or struggling with grammar/spelling whathaveyou and 'It's out for public consumption so writers just need to get a thick skin and deal with it' and/or 'Critical feedback is important to improve a writer's skill1!!! I'm doing them a favor!!1!!'. I'm glad we've come around to an era of fandom where it seems most people generally accept that unsolicited critical reviews ('flames' as we called them back then) are rude and the people who still leave them are shunned/corrected accordingly.

Bc like yeah, I'm not going to dispute that constructive criticism CAN be helpful, but I think an important part of it actually being helpful is 1) the writer's consent/interest in receiving it in the first place -bc we're talking about FANFIC not a professionally published work- and 2) the person offering the concrit understanding and respecting what the writer's goals are and having points to offer that are actually useful to that end. Like, if someone has set out to write a self-indulgent self-insert OC romance story, telling them that OCs, OC x canon is trash and they should consider writing a entirely different story than the one they're working on isn't constructive or helpful in any way, it's just one person trying to enforce their own fic preferences on an unwilling participant when they could just as easily avoid the tropes they don't want to see in the first place. That kind of 'criticism' isn't so much helpful feedback as it is an attempt to gatekeep what kind of fanfic should be written at all based on specific personal standards, it doesn't allow for the reality that different people are looking for different things in stories and they should be allowed to write/read what they want to. It doesn't allow for the reality that not everything is intended for everyone. It absolutely stifles creativity and diversity within fandom/fanfic communities.

Not to mention it's just, imo, very arrogant? To like, deputize oneself as the highest authority and greatest mind on writing in the world and feel like one's negative input is some kind of god's gift to the writer and they should be grateful to receive these 'pearls of wisdom' they didn't even ask for in the first place?? Like, who the fuck are you lol??? If I'm writing a self insert mary sue OC x canon and my entire goal in doing that is to be self-indulgent and have fun, you're not exactly helping anything by telling me I shouldn't be writing that at all just bc you think it's cringe. That's not concrit, that's just being an entitled ass over how someone else plays with their toys, like let's be so fr here!!! JUST READ SOMETHING ELSE!!! Or better yet get to your keyboard and write the story YOU want to read instead of dragging other people down!!!

And the hypothetical notion that we should have 'dislike' or downvote buttons on fics makes me want hurl something through a window tbh, like that wouldn't ever be abused by trolls and/or just kill most people's drive to put their work out at all /s

idk I just feel like actual, helpful constructive criticism comes from those who understand and appreciate the genre they're commenting on (and even better if they've written within it themselves). It's not 'ew OC x canon is so dumb this makes no sense to me it's OOC' or whatever, it's more like 'omg I remembered your OC had trauma from this past event, maybe it could influence their reaction in this other scene??' THAT is understanding the assignment, THAT is being helpful and constructive, THAT is actually bringing something to the table that the writer can use!!!

Sometimes though I really do worry we could slide back into that Age of Entitlement, what with all the purity contests in fandom nowadays, an alarming amount of people seeing no issue in pushing their own preferences and agendas on other people's work bc it's 'problematic' to them or whatever, that culture of feeling emboldened to harass people bc 'they deserve it for writing x ship' etc and I really, really hope we can hold on to the underappreciated art of minding our own fucking business lmao

[toast-thief]

I don’t believe you deserve the criticism you’ve been receiving, but I do think there's room for improvement in how you communicate your feedback. If this issue isn’t addressed, it might continue to persist. For example, saying things like “learn colour theory” isn’t helpful or constructive.

When evaluating a work of art, the process can be broken down into four basic steps: describing, analyzing, interpreting, and evaluating. Art critics use these steps, but as an online communicator, you don’t need to follow them rigidly—however, keeping these in mind can help refine your approach.

Here are some tips for providing more constructive criticism:

Actionable: Feedback should offer clear guidance on how to improve. Unhelpful criticism, on the other hand, doesn’t provide any direction for growth.

Clear: The message should be straightforward to avoid confusion. The goal is to ensure that the person receiving the feedback knows exactly what to work on.

While your criticism isn't destructive, it does come across as unclear or blunt, which can make it difficult for others to take seriously. Sometimes, the tone can be perceived as unstructured or overly critical, which may lead to the response you’re receiving. I encourage you to consider how your words may be interpreted, as this can have a significant impact on how others engage with your feedback.

It might be helpful to explore different methods of giving constructive criticism. You have the potential to be insightful, but honing this skill will help your feedback be more effective and better received. Taking the time to ensure your critique is thoughtful and clear will help you avoid the risk of coming across as harsh or unhelpful. Criticism is most valuable when it’s both kind and clear, and learning to offer it in a constructive manner will strengthen your interactions.

If you don’t have anything positive or constructive to say, it might be best to refrain from commenting. Ultimately, offering feedback in a more thoughtful way will help you avoid being misunderstood and will encourage others to engage with your thoughts more meaningfully.

gee thanks, i feel kinder already

[graveyard-party666]

Blood & Wine

The calm before the storm

I started writing this chapter in May. I tried finishing it in one week but as you can tell i couldn't. I only finished it a few weeks ago.

You can certainly tell that different parts of that chapter were written in different time and in different mental state. Also, I'm introducing my new OC here.

I honestly don't really like how it came out but it is what it is. You can call it a filler chapter.

Yes, it's long. Probably the longest chapter I've written.

Adult life brings so much obstacles. That Red understood when it turned or that she needs to talk to stupid people in order to work. Unfortunate.  Another thing Red learned during her work as a psychologist is the fact that you can't put your expectations too high, never tell your clients about the expectations or promise them the results. Because that's not how psychology works.

Another thing Red learned is the fact that having friends from different fields is very beneficial. As much as she would rather avoid all that military world, everything somehow leads to the military in the end. Even before she started working as a consultant for TF141 she had to work with a few soldiers who she still deeply respects.

Friendship offers a myriad of benefits for humans that extend far beyond mere social interaction. Firstly, friendships provide a crucial source of emotional support. Whether celebrating triumphs or weathering challenges, friends offer a listening ear, empathy, and understanding, which can help individuals navigate the complexities of life with greater ease.

Moreover, friendships contribute to reducing stress levels and enhancing overall mental well-being. Spending time with friends promotes the release of feel-good hormones like oxytocin and serotonin, which can alleviate feelings of loneliness and anxiety. This, in turn, fosters a sense of happiness and contentment.

Furthermore, friendships serve as catalysts for personal growth and development. Through interactions with friends, individuals gain new perspectives, receive constructive feedback, and engage in self-reflection, which are essential components of self-improvement. Whether through shared experiences or intellectual discussions, friendships facilitate learning and expansion of one's worldview.

Social connection is a fundamental human need, and friendships fulfill this need by providing a sense of belonging and acceptance. Feeling connected to others fosters a sense of community and strengthens interpersonal bonds, which can bolster self-esteem and confidence.

During times of adversity, friendships become invaluable resources for resilience. Having a support network of friends can help individuals cope with challenges, providing encouragement, motivation, and practical assistance when needed most. Knowing that one is not alone in facing life's trials can instill a sense of hope and perseverance.

In summary, friendships enrich our lives in myriad ways, offering emotional support, reducing stress, fostering personal growth, enhancing social connection, and bolstering resilience. Investing in meaningful friendships is not only enjoyable but also essential for nurturing our overall well-being and fulfillment.

Or at least that's what psychology books say.

To Red friendship is something nobody could ever put in words or explain.

Friendship, she pondered, was a tapestry woven from moments shared, laughter echoing through the halls of memory, and the silent understanding between souls. It was the comforting presence on a dark night, the unwavering support during turbulent times, and the joy found in simple companionship.

To her, friendship was more than just a bond; it was a lifeline, a beacon of light guiding her through the darkest of storms. And as she stood there, enveloped by the tranquil beauty of the night, she couldn't help but feel grateful for the cherished friends who had become her family, her anchors in an ever-changing world.

Too poetic, isn't it? That's why it's better not to talk about it.

What she knew exactly is that friend will always help, always warn you. That's how she was. That's what she asks from people.

Since professor Benar started helping her with profile, those thoughts about friendship and its meaning somehow became much more constant.

The weird gut feeling that was eating her up almost every day was getting unbearable. Something didn't feel right. It's as if that case was much deeper than she thought and then everyone else thought.

Her friendship with the soldiers of Task Force 141 can be called strange, incomprehensible, naive. But Red doesn’t care much about what their friendship might be called. But the relationship with the professor can hardly be called friendship. Yes, perhaps Red has become paranoid, but for some reason the appearance of her so respected professor raises a lot of questions, but only for her.

The professor always seemed to be watching the girl's slightest movement.  He is a genius, a professional, and Red has learned to analyze any of his words or actions, looking for hidden subtext. Abel Benar was not one to do or say anything just for the sake of it. And he himself believed that there was some kind of secret meaning in everything.

Why did he came now?

Red sat in her office, the soft ticking of the clock on the wall marking the passage of time. Her office was a sanctuary of calm, with shelves lined with books on psychology, a well-worn leather couch for patients, and her desk neatly organized. Yet, despite the serenity of her surroundings, her mind was anything but calm. She leaned back in her chair, her eyes unfocused as she stared at a spot on the ceiling, lost in thought.

Hassan's file lay open on her desk, the pages filled with notes, transcripts, and psychological evaluations. A name that had become synonymous with terror in the media, was her latest and most challenging case. The more she delved into his mind, the more she felt an unsettling, nagging sensation in her gut that there was something much deeper and more complex at play.

She flipped through the pages, her eyes scanning the meticulously detailed notes. Hassan's background was filled with trauma, loss, and radicalization, a story all too common in the profiles of terrorists. But there were inconsistencies, fragments of his story that didn't quite fit. Red couldn't shake the feeling that Hassan wasn't just a product of his environment; there was something else, something unseen that was influencing him.

Red turned her chair towards the window, looking out at the city skyline. Her instincts had never led her astray before. She had a talent for seeing the patterns that others missed, for understanding the hidden motives behind human behavior. And her instincts were screaming at her now that there was more to Hassan's story than met the eye.

Reaching for her phone, Red dialed the number of her contact. She only had a few minutes before professor Benar comes back. And the last thing she wants right now is getting him into her assumptions based on intuition. So she called that one person. The person she could trust, the soldier who can be trust. The one who she had an unlike friendship with. Who knows not to call her by her name.

She needed more information, more pieces of the puzzle to fit together. As she waited for the call to connect, she glanced back at Hassan's file, her resolve hardening. She would get to the bottom of this, no matter how deep she had to dig.

Because Red knew that understanding Hassan wasn't just about profiling a terrorist. It was about uncovering a truth that could prevent future atrocities, about seeing the humanity even in those society deemed monsters. And her gut told her that the truth about Hassan was far more complicated and far more important than anyone realized.

The phone clicked as the line connected, and Red steeled herself for the conversation ahead. She would follow her instincts, no matter where they led her, because sometimes the mind's darkest corners held the key to understanding, and she was determined to unlock it.

As the phone rang, Red glanced back at Hassan's file, her resolve hardening.

"Hey, Red," came Major Adam Black's deep, steady voice on the other end of the line. "Long time no hear. What’s up?"

"Adam," she began, a small smile tugging at her lips despite the seriousness of the situation. "I will be talking quickly. I need your help. I'm working on infamous terrorist's psychological profile, and there's something off. I can't put my finger on it, but my gut is telling me there's more to this than anyone realizes."

"Figures you'd call with a puzzle," Adam chuckled, a warm, familiar sound. "You always did love the tricky ones. What’s the scoop?"

"I need more information," she said. "There are gaps in his story, inconsistencies that don't make sense. I think it's important. I think it's something bigger than CIA thinks it is."

"Intriguing," Adam replied, his tone growing more serious. "Alright, send me everything you have. I’ll reach out to some contacts. We'll crack this together."

"Thanks, Adam," Red said, relief washing over her. "I knew I could count on you."

"Always," he said, the smile evident in his voice. "I missed this, you know? Stay safe, Red. We'll get to the bottom of this."

As she ended the call, Red felt a renewed sense of determination. She would follow her instincts, no matter where they led her, because sometimes the mind's darkest corners held the key to understanding, and she was determined to unlock it.

She's alone in this.

The sudden feeling of anxiety washed over Red as she started thinking about this whole ordeal. There is the certain connection in everything, the pattern is obvious yet confusing.

Working with professor was easy, he never once made Red feel like she's not smart enough. But the team kept its distance from him which were understandable. They didn't trust Red at first too, probably still don't trust her completely.

Red glanced at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time that afternoon. The day had dragged on, with deadlines piling up and meetings blending into one another. She wasn’t alone in her longing for the workday to end. Red could feel the same restlessness in the air from her colleagues, all of them itching to close their laptops with unfinished reports and escape the monotony of the HQ.

What kept her going was the thought of the evening ahead—a moment when the day would finally end, and she could unwind with the people she had shared this long day with. To listen Price's stories, to try and mediate between Gaz and Soap's bickering, to sit in silence with Ghost. There was something comforting about the idea of sitting together, laughing over casual conversation, and raising a glass at the end of it all. Red could almost taste the drink she would share with them, the laughter that would echo across the table, and the sense of relief that would come when they were no longer coworkers, but just friends, relaxing after a long day. And maybe she would even forget about her insecurities and believe for a moment that they trust her.

Red tapped her fingers against the desk, her mind drifting away from the spreadsheets and emails demanding her attention. Outside, the golden light of early evening was already filtering through the windows, signaling the end of the day was near. She sighed, shifting in her seat, knowing there were still a few more tasks to check off before she could truly relax. But her thoughts kept returning to the same place: the moment when work would finally be over.

She could already picture it in her head—how she and her colleagues would gather at their favorite spot down the street. The usual post-work ritual, where they would trade in the stress of the HQ for the easy comfort of shared drinks and stories. Red liked these moments the most, when the formalities of the workday faded away and they could just be themselves. There was a sense of camaraderie that only seemed to emerge when the workday was behind them, as if the exhaustion of the hours before somehow strengthened their bond.

Red imagined the laughter bubbling up as someone made a joke, or the way a cold drink felt in hand after a day of constant work. She wanted to feel that sense of release, the collective sigh they would all share as they eased into the evening, knowing that for a little while, the responsibilities of tomorrow could wait. In those moments, with the warmth of her colleagues around her and the sharp bite of a drink on her tongue, Red always felt a little more alive, as if the whole day had been leading up to this one point of connection and relief.

As the clock finally approached the end of the shift, the office buzzed with a sense of impending freedom. Red's thoughts were already dancing around the idea of drinks with her colleagues when the door swung open with a creak. In walked Soap, his unmistakable presence lighting up the room. Readheaded woman still couldn't understand how him and the rest became such an important part of her life.

“Come on, Red!” he called out, his thick Scottish accent slicing through the chatter. “Are ye gonna sit there all day or what? The pub’s waitin’!”

Red looked up, her anticipation of the evening sparking into excitement at his familiar, boisterous tone. Soap had a knack for bringing energy wherever he went, and his playful urgency made her smile.

“Alright, alright, I’m coming!” she replied, quickly gathering her things. He leaned against her desk, arms crossed, grinning as he waited, clearly amused by her flustered pace.

“Ye’ve been workin’ like a dog today with that professor of yours,” he teased, his eyes twinkling. “A wee break’s long overdue. The others will be there already, drinkin’ our share!”

With a final glance at the clock, Red felt the last vestiges of the workday melt away. Soap’s enthusiasm was contagious, and she felt a rush of relief and eagerness to escape the office confines. As she rushed to join him, Soap stepped back, gesturing dramatically toward the door as if it were a grand entrance.

“After ye, lass!” he said with a mock bow, and they both laughed, ready to leave the workday behind and embrace the evening ahead.

The pub wasn't busy, woman could see why Task Force's soldiers prefer this place. It's peaceful. The blues plays softly in the back, some posters on the walls. Feels cool.

As Red and Soap stepped into the dimly lit pub, the warm atmosphere enveloped them like a welcoming embrace.

“Look who finally made it!” chuckled Gaz from their usual corner table, raising his glass in a cheerful toast. Captain Price sat beside him, a knowing smile on his face as he took a sip of his drink. Ghost leaned back in his chair, his signature skull mask partially obscuring his expression, but Red couldn’t shake the sense of intensity that surrounded him.

“Hope ye didn’t wait long,” Soap said, swaggering toward the table with an exaggerated air. Red followed, feeling the excitement of the evening lift her spirits.

“Not at all. We saved a spot for you two,” Price replied, gesturing to the empty seats. Red slid into the booth next to Ghost, acutely aware of how close they were. His presence was comforting yet intimidating, making it hard to focus on anything else.

The conversation flowed easily as drinks were poured and stories exchanged. Soap regaled them with tales of the day’s mishaps, earning hearty laughter from Gaz and Price. Readhead joined in, her laughter ringing out, but her gaze would occasionally drift toward Ghost. He seemed quieter than the others, his eyes observing the interactions with a subtle intensity that intrigued her.

“You alright, Red?” Ghost suddenly asked, his voice low and steady, breaking through her thoughts. She blinked, surprised he had noticed her moment of silence.

“Yeah, just… enjoying the stories,” she replied, trying to keep her tone casual. She felt a warmth rise in her cheeks, hoping the dim light would mask her slight embarrassment.

'Good job... keep staring and embarrassing yourself,' psychologist couldn't help but scold herself.

“Ye’re too quiet for a night out,” Soap teased, nudging her. “What’s got yer attention?”

Red shot him a playful glare, grateful for the distraction. “Nothing, just thinking about how much work I’m going to have tomorrow,” she deflected, a smile on her lips.

“Ah, come on!” Gaz chimed in. “Leave the work behind for tonight! We’ve got drinks and good company. That’s what matters.”

Red nodded, trying to immerse herself in the moment. The night wore on, laughter growing louder as the drinks flowed freely, creating a sense of camaraderie that felt invigorating.

As the evening unfolded, psychologist felt a comfortable connection with her colleagues, Ghost included. His occasional glances in her direction made her heart race, but she pushed the feeling aside, focusing instead on the camaraderie and joy that filled the air. Ghost may have caught her eye more than once. For example, when he caught her dancing in her office... but she was determined not to read too much into it, especially knowing her issues with commitment. After all, it was just a night out with people she is working with, and woman intended to enjoy every minute of it.

As the night continued to unfold in the cozy pub, the atmosphere was filled with laughter and conversations. Captain Price leaned back in his chair, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Alright, lads,” he said, gaining the attention of everyone at the table. “I've got something to show you.”

He pulled out his phone, scrolling through photos until he landed on an old one. With a grin, he turned the screen toward the group. “Check this out."

The table leaned in, curiosity piqued. The image revealed a much younger Price in his Lieutenant days, looking surprisingly clean-shaven and almost boyish. His trademark cap was nowhere to be seen, and his blue eyes sparkled with youthful energy.

“Blimey, is that really you?” Soap exclaimed, barely containing his laughter. “You look like a completely different person without the beard!”

Gaz chuckled, unable to help himself. “You almost look… approachable!” he added playfully, his eyes dancing with amusement.

Price smirked, raising an eyebrow. “Approachable? I’ll have you know I was just as intimidating back then,” he shot back, feigning offense.

“Intimidating? You look like you just stepped off a school bus!” Gaz chimed in, shaking his head with a grin.

Even Ghost, who typically maintained his grumpy, stoic demeanor, chuckled softly at the sight. He tilted his head slightly as he examined the picture, a hint of a smile breaking through his usual composure. “Still had the same steely glare,” he remarked, his voice low but laced with amusement.

Then Red leaned in closer, squinting at the picture with mock seriousness. “Jesus Christ, Captain… you should have told me you're naked in that picture!” she exclaimed, the words slipping out before she could stop herself.

The table erupted into laughter, and Price’s eyes widened in playful shock. “I’m not naked!” he protested, trying to regain his composure. “It’s just a lack of facial hair, that’s all!”

“Right, right,” Red said with a smirk, enjoying the banter. “But seriously, it’s a whole new look for you.”

“Very funny,” Price replied, feigning annoyance but unable to hide his smile. “But you’ve got to admit, I was quite the dashing young officer.”

“Dashing?” Soap cackled. “More like fresh-faced! I can’t believe you went for the clean-shaven look. What were you thinkin’?”

Price shrugged, the laughter still bubbling around the table. “I was young and foolish, obviously. It was a different time—no need for the beard when I was trying to impress the brass.”

The group continued to laugh and share stories, the camaraderie flowing freely. Red felt a warmth spread through her, the memories and banter weaving a tapestry of friendship that made her heart feel full. Even Ghost’s rare chuckle added to the evening's lightheartedness, making it all the more enjoyable.

This felt... right. No professors, no terrorists. But the feeling that it was calm before the storm wasn't leaving Red's mind. The anxiety of what might come next was bothering her, and maybe she should listen to her doubts.

Dubito ergo cogito, cogito ergo sum.

Tag list: @cloudofbutterflies92 @chloekistune

[peppermakesart]

With the new year starting and the 2 year anniversary of me beginning to draw approaching, I wanted to take some time to reflect on where I was when I first started, and reaffirm the core principles that have been guiding my progress.

Going into 2023, I was dealing with a lot of stress and received an official diagnosis for an anxiety disorder, so I was looking to find ways to reduce stress in my life.

One of the first changes I made was to quit playing Dead by Daylight. A friend had introduced it to me about a year before that, and I really enjoyed it for the first 3 months or so. At first it felt incredibly immersive, especially for someone who isn’t good with horror movies, but as I got the hang of the nuances it became too much about memorizing optimal play and picking efficient options, and the gameplay can be horribly toxic. I never played MMOs and only played FPS games poorly without a headset, so this was my first experience with real internet toxicity.

After cutting that out of my life, I needed to find something else to fill that time, and I didn’t want to just get into another video game. I had also managed to completely avoid Twitter until 2022 (I kinda live under a rock) joining because of a friend of mine who was a professional artist. So around that time I was finding other artists that appealed to me, and the person who inspired me to start drawing is Stinky Katie.

Seeing that art didn’t necessarily need to be technical to be beautiful art made the barrier to entry feel a lot lower, and you can see a lot of her influence in my early work. To be clear, I’m not saying her art doesn’t require tremendous skill just because it looks simple. It takes a lot of knowledge to be able to simplify something down to its base elements while retaining your own art style, and 2 years later I think she’s even more of a genius than I did before.

My second major influence was the artist who I was friends with, we were only close for a short time, but I got to get a behind the scenes look at someone who earns most of their income off commissions. I gained an appreciation for the effort that goes into gaining those skills, and enjoyed encouraging them and seeing how much the validation spurred them on when they were struggling with deadlines. They had once mentioned wanting to create a discord art server where criticism is banned, and it’s just a circlejerk of people complimenting each other’s art, and I like the energy behind that. I decided to take that energy with me when I started drawing myself, and I try to go out of my way to show support for as many artists as I can. There is benefit in receiving constructive criticism and applying that feedback, but you can get that from someone else, I’d rather just try to spread a bit of positivity. If your one compliment is the difference that convinces someone not to quit, that’s worth more that any amount of technical improvement.

Around this time when I first decided to draw, I read an article that left a big impression on me. It was written by a woman who was a schoolteacher specializing in young children, and she spoke about how her favorite type of art was from a prompt she would have the children make, where they drew their interpretation of “safety”. I remember reading her describe how she would bawl her eyes out looking through what all the children made, and it further emphasized that the most important quality in a piece of art is how it makes you feel, and everything else is secondary. I feel like I can generally divide the art I make into two categories, pieces that I seek to capture a certain feeling or idea, and the pieces where I’m mostly focused on the art itself, either emphasizing the quality of detail in the current work or experimenting with various ideas in hopes of expanding my artistic toolkit.

It’s why I consider the first picture my favorite early piece of mine and not the second. I had just found out a coworker of mine had died, and I was able to capture a snapshot of how I felt at the time, to help process it and separate myself from it a bit. Sometimes it’s easier for me to control my emotions if I put them to paper, once I’ve placed them somewhere it’s easier to feel like I’ll be able to pick them back up later. I’m really proud of the second piece too, I locked in for 4.5 hours for something really clean, and the artist who created the original sprite found it and complimented me on it, but it just isn’t personal in the same way.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. Here’s the first Smoliv I ever drew, it’s been my profile pic ever since everywhere publicly. It has symbolic meaning for me, it’s what ties together all the feelings I just described, and I want to stay grounded to where I was when I began.

[astrojulia]

Feedback Tips to give to your Reader

~ 10 tips for your feedback after receiving a tarot or chart reading

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Providing feedback is essential in helping Tarot or Natal Chart readers improve their skills and understand how their readings resonate with their clients. And if you're not an as****e you already wondered how you would do it. Here's a list of tips on how to give good feedback:

Be specific: When giving feedback, try to provide specific examples or instances that stood out to you during the reading. This allows the reader to understand what aspects were particularly meaningful or accurate.

Focus on the positive: Start your feedback by highlighting the aspects of the reading that resonated with you or provided valuable insights. Positive reinforcement can encourage the reader to continue their good work and build confidence.

Be constructive: If there are areas that you felt could be improved or clarified, offer constructive criticism. Be tactful and respectful in your suggestions, focusing on how the reader can enhance their skills rather than pointing out flaws or mistakes.

Express your emotions and experiences: Share how the reading made you feel or how it affected you personally. By expressing your emotional response, the reader can gauge the impact of their reading and understand its significance.

Provide context: If there were specific circumstances or questions that you were hoping the reading would address, explain them to the reader. This information can help the reader understand your expectations and tailor future readings accordingly.

Be honest: Honesty is crucial in feedback. If something didn't resonate with you or if you found the reading confusing, respectfully communicate your concerns. This helps the reader understand different perspectives and learn from the experience.

Avoid judgment or personal attacks: It's important to maintain a respectful and empathetic tone in your feedback. Avoid criticizing the reader's abilities, beliefs, or personal qualities. Instead, focus on the content and delivery of the reading.

Offer suggestions for improvement: If you have any ideas or suggestions for how the reader can enhance their skills or presentation, share them in a supportive manner. This can provide valuable insights and perspectives for the reader's growth.

Appreciate the effort: Remember to express your appreciation for the reader's time, effort, and dedication. Acknowledge their commitment to their craft and the value they bring through their readings.

Follow up if necessary: If you receive a response from the reader or have further questions or concerns, engage in a constructive dialogue. This can deepen your understanding of the reading and provide an opportunity for clarification or additional insights.

By following these tips, you can provide meaningful and helpful feedback to tarot or Natal Chart readers, supporting their growth and development while also enhancing your own experience.

Kisses from the Sea!

(CC) AstroJulia Some Rights Reserved

[lawgrain]

What's your thoughts on receiving a random review of someone asking you to read their story just because it's in the same fandom, and they want your feedback on it?

Mixed? I'd be flattered if people wanted my opinion or hold my opinion in a positive light. I just feel there's a lot of pressure with the idea? If someone holds my opinion that high then I don't want to disappoint if there has to be constructive criticism. There's always things that aren't my cup of tea but that doesn't mean it's bad. Also, I've found that I'll stray from reading a fandom I write in to avoid overloading myself on the fandom.

In a different light, I don't personally mind being asked but it needs to be understood not to expect a yes. The way that request is phrased does matter and could change my take on it. If it comes across as a demand or is in disregard to the writer in will come across differently. I also think it might be a thing to acknowledge their work before asking for something if it's in their ao3 comments. If it's a dm or an ask, I'm not sure I'd care as much if a work is brought up. The more I type the more I realize how this is a complicated topic. If anyone wants to chime in the comments, please chime on in!

[octopuscityblues]

February 2024 Update - Kaf & the Octonauts

Hello everyone. This is your host Kaftan von Kaffeeklatsch and you're listening to the Cosmic Millipede Podcast, the show about rocket ships, red quasars, and the search for extraterrestrial life. Before getting to today's interview, I'd like to apologize for the delay since our last episode. We've been quite busy preparing content for the new year, so it took more time than expected.

Today's sponsor is the Ghost in a Bottle Consortium. Do check out their upcoming Octopus City Simulation that's coming soon. You can already download a lengthy demo on Steam, itch.io or GOG. Oh, and if you're reading the transcript after the episode, we took the liberty of adding the latest Octopus City Blues screenshots for you to admire.

Our guest today needs no introduction. I'm talking about the infamous business tycoon, the world's wealthiest person, and the founder of Kosmomash Rockets, Constantin Mandibule. Unless you've been living under a rock for the last ten years, I'm sure you're familiar with Kosmomash's long-awaited projects: the first privately-developed rocket to carry tourists to the moon, and the ambitious luxury resort they're building over there.

Monsieur Constantin Mandibule, thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to have this chat.

It's my pleasure, Kaftan. And please, there's no need for formalities. Just call me ConMan—all my friends do.

Uh… all right, Monsieur Conman. Last year was a very important one for Kosmomash, wasn't it?

Absolutement! It was also different—much more business-focused than previous years. Between showcasing our rocket prototypes publicly and at industry events, talking to potential partners, and onboarding new talent, comparatively less time was spent on developing rocket components. These activities were all essential for establishing a strong promotional foundation for this year's big launch. With that out of the way, we are currently back to focusing on construction.

How exciting! The prototype you unveiled during the Next Fest Aerospace Convention caused quite a stir among the attendees. Could you tell us more about it?

What I can tell you, Kaftan, is that it took a lot of hard work to finally get the prototype out the door. It was useful preparation for our final launch, too. For example, working with STEAM's [Editor's Note: Space Tourism Enforcement And Monitoring agency] launch regulations and cloud computing infrastructure forced us to optimize our release processes.

The feedback we received from the attendees was extremely valuable as well; while some of the casualties were avoidable, we continue to learn from every tragedy. Au fait, we just published a new version of our prototype specs a couple of weeks ago, fixing many issues encountered by real users in the wild.

The accidents were regrettable, but the altar of technology demands its sacrifices. What are some of the lessons learned from the launch of the prototype?

Euh… much of it has to do with improving the user experience. For example, our DAISY module is programmed to react to the needs of space tourists. However, as post-war treaties ban the use of AI, we have to manually write responses to every potential user query. Watching so many lab ra—err, people, try the demo helped us identify hundreds of new DAISY responses.

Another finding from the handful of unfortunate incidents was that the control systems were not very intuitive to first-time users. As the average space tourist isn't a trained pilot, we had to place large signs all over the space module—really obvious warnings such as "Keep the windows closed after launch", "Repeatedly press the red button to breathe", or "Carefully arrange the fusion matrix stack if the gradient is inverted".

There were, en outre, numerous fixes and rocket engine performance improvements. We also introduced two new cockpit views to track the current flight status: the Facts And Figures screen displays various metrics during and at the end of the trip, while the Calendar App keeps track of all the space debris collected along the flight path.

That's very interesting. The prototype must be much safer now, especially compared to the versions you tested at the INDIGO SKIES and SpaceAdventureX events last year.

Tout à fait! And let's not forget the Independent Rocketry Showcase, the Test & Fly event, and the numerous people who tried our prototype rocket kit at home and streamed it online. We're really thankful to everyone who got injured to get us closer towards uncovering the dark mysteries of the great beyond.

And closer to lining your pockets, no doubt. Moving on, you mentioned hiring new colleagues.

Oui, c'est juste. People are surprised when I say this, Kaftan, but I've been writing all of the company's press releases from the very beginning. I simply enjoy doing it! laughs. English is obviously not my mother tongue, and so a lot of mistakes were made. Thankfully, we now have a professional editor, Julia Seeholzer, to help us sort out all the there's, theirs, and they'res!

More recently, Shannon Mason, the celebrated composer also known as Pongball, has joined the team, and is already working on some exciting tunes. Some of these will be played during the long elevator rides to the underground mines beneath the lunar resort. Manual space labor doesn't have to be boring, after all!

Are we still talking about space tourists? Anyway, with all the feedback, exposure, and new colleagues, it sounds like you're on target for this year's big launch. What are you working on these days?

Like I said, the focus is finally back to developing new things. Last year we worked on a western themed area in the planned resort. We're wrapping that up while also constructing a magnificent coliseum and an underwater village. There's a lot going on behind the scenes that we can't talk about yet. We want it to be une grande surprise for our precious guests.

As for the planned launch, it's still going according to plan, and we're doing our best to meet our summer targets. With that said, the prototype showed us that no matter how much testing we do, actual users will keep uncovering all the bugs… I mean, easter eggs, we intentionally add. Quality Assurance remains the biggest unknown at the moment.

On the other hand, we've invested in a very solid foundation over the years, and everyone's doing their best to finally give humanity the salvation it so desperately needs. One way or another, I'm confident that this year is the year of Kosmomash. After all, we only need to ensure that half the tourists actually make it to the moon. How hard can it be?

Who knows? It's not like we're talking about rocket science or anything. In any case, thank you, Monsieur Conman, for your valuable time, and good luck with your ambitious plans for this year. I hope we get to talk again after the first batch of tourists make it to the moon.

Moi aussi! Thank you for having me, Herr Kaftan.

[cambridgeenglishacdemy]

Mastering the IELTS Que Card: Achieving 8+ Bands in the Speaking Test

Are you gearing up to take the IELTS Speaking Test? If so, you’re likely aware of the importance of the Que Card. This small piece of paper holds immense power — it’s your ticket to showcase your speaking abilities and impress examiners. Achieving a band score of 8 or higher is no small feat, but with the right strategies and practices in place, you can elevate your performance.

The Que Card may seem intimidating at first glance; however, mastering it could be one of your greatest assets in this test. With effective preparation techniques and an understanding of what examiners are looking for, you can transform anxiety into confidence. Ready to dive deeper? Let’s explore how you can tackle those Que Cards like a pro!

Note — Best IELTS Coaching in Delhi

Tips and Strategies to Tackle the IELTS Que Card:

Approaching the IELTS Que Card requires a blend of strategy and practice. Start by familiarizing yourself with the card’s structure. Each card prompts you to speak about a specific topic, usually covering personal experiences or opinions.

Practice brainstorming quickly. When you receive a Que Card, take a minute to jot down key points before speaking. This helps organize your thoughts and ensures you cover all aspects of the question.

Another effective strategy is role-playing with friends or study partners. Simulating real test conditions can reduce anxiety while enhancing your ability to think on your feet.

Don’t forget to time yourself during practice sessions. Aim for one to two minutes per response, as this mirrors actual exam conditions. The more comfortable you become with these strategies, the more fluent and coherent your responses will be in the test itself.

Understanding the Que Card and Its Importance

The IELTS Que Card is a pivotal component of the speaking test. It presents a topic that candidates must discuss for one to two minutes. Understanding how it works can significantly impact your performance.

Each card features prompts, including key points you should address in your response. This structure helps test-takers organize their thoughts quickly and deliver coherent answers under time constraints.

Mastering the Que Card not only enhances confidence but also allows for more dynamic interaction with the examiner. As you practice, you’ll learn to develop ideas on the spot, which reflects positively in fluency assessments.

Moreover, familiarizing yourself with different topics prepares you for unexpected questions. By understanding this format deeply, you’re setting yourself up for success in what can be a daunting part of the IELTS exam journey.

Tips for Preparing and Practicing with Que Cards

Preparing for the IELTS Que Card requires a strategic approach. Start by familiarizing yourself with common topics. These can range from personal experiences to abstract concepts.

Practice regularly using a timer. Allocate one minute to prepare your thoughts and then speak for two minutes. This will help you manage time effectively during the test.

Record yourself while practicing. Listening back allows you to identify areas for improvement, be it in clarity or coherence.

Engage in mock speaking sessions with peers or tutors. Constructive feedback is invaluable and can highlight strengths you may not have noticed.

Incorporate vocabulary relevant to different themes into your practice sessions. This enriches your language skills and prepares you for diverse questions on exam day.

Stay relaxed during preparation; confidence plays a key role in delivering effective responses under pressure.

Common Mistakes to Avoid in the Speaking Test

One common mistake candidates make is overthinking their answers. This often leads to long pauses or filler words like “um” and “uh.” Instead, focus on speaking naturally and confidently.

Another pitfall is memorizing responses. While preparation is essential, sounding robotic can cost you marks. Aim for spontaneity in your speech.

Additionally, many overlook the importance of body language. Poor eye contact or a lack of engagement can distract from what you’re saying.

Some students also fail to elaborate on their points. Providing examples or personal anecdotes enriches your answer and showcases your language skills effectively.

Be cautious with pronunciation issues; mispronouncing key terms can lead to misunderstandings that affect clarity. Practicing difficult words aloud will enhance your confidence during the test.

Techniques for Improving Fluency and Coherence in Responses

Fluency and coherence are key components of a successful IELTS speaking test. To enhance fluency, practice speaking regularly without overthinking your words. Engage in conversations about various topics with friends or language partners.

Linking words play a significant role in coherence. Use transition phrases like “on the other hand” or “in addition” to connect your ideas smoothly. This helps create a logical flow in your responses.

Another effective technique is to structure your answers clearly. Start with an introduction, followed by supporting details, and conclude with a summary statement when appropriate. This approach gives listeners a clear understanding of your points.

Don’t forget to embrace pauses naturally; they can help you gather your thoughts without disrupting the flow of conversation. Remember that confidence also contributes significantly to how fluent you sound while speaking!

Strategies for Achieving High Bands in Pronunciation and Vocabulary

Mastering pronunciation and vocabulary is crucial for a high score in the IELTS speaking test. Start by immersing yourself in English through podcasts, audiobooks, and videos. This exposure will help you grasp natural speech patterns.

Practice mimicking native speakers. Focus on their intonation and stress patterns. Recording your voice can provide valuable feedback on areas needing improvement.

When it comes to vocabulary, read widely across different subjects. Make note of new words and phrases, then actively incorporate them into your daily conversations or writing exercises.

Use synonyms to avoid repetition but ensure that you’re comfortable with each word’s meaning. Context matters when choosing the right vocabulary; using words appropriately demonstrates mastery.

Don’t shy away from idiomatic expressions or phrasal verbs — they add flair to your speech! Just remember to use them naturally within context rather than forcing them into conversation.

Conclusion: How Proper Preparation with Que Cards can Help You Ace the IELTS Speaking Test

Mastering the IELTS Que Card is a game-changer for anyone aiming to secure a high band score in the speaking test. Proper preparation not only boosts confidence but also enhances your ability to express thoughts clearly and coherently.

By familiarizing yourself with Que Cards, you can develop structured responses that showcase your fluency. Practice is key — repeatedly engaging with various topics allows you to adapt quickly during the actual exam. Remember, avoiding common pitfalls while focusing on pronunciation and vocabulary will make a significant difference in your performance.

Embrace these strategies as part of your study routine, and watch how they transform your speaking skills. With dedication and smart preparation using Que Cards, you’ll be well-equipped to excel on test day. Your dream score is within reach; it’s time to take action!

Related Article — Best IELTS Coaching Institute in India

[lifeandtimesofljm]

Doubters Into Believers. Transmute fear into faith and doubt into belief.

For the majority of my life I’ve been the labeled as the outsider. The visionary, surrounded by leaders who struggle with foresight and followers who avoid hindsight. It’s been a thankless journey to reach a space where my clarity of understanding not only resonates with those around me but affords me a platform to share my truths.

The benefit of having my wisdom and innovation doubted at every phase meant that I now know exactly what the naysayers are digging up in their bag of “who does she think she is?” I have let fear of failure block me from attempting many solo endeavors, but I never let it rob me of an opportunity that presented itself.

One question that sets me on the path towards dismantling any fear of success is:

What do I need to succeed?

Is it capital, relationships, space, time or confidence?

All of these factors are ALWAYS 100% obtainable. It requires you to identify the steps needed to acquire them, the commitment to yourself and the belief that you will receive them at the perfect time and in the correct sequence.

but then… there is fear’s cousin, doubt.

Doubt is this tricky phenomenon that rides into your subconscious on a wave of fear. Its hard to detect because sometimes, its just a nervous feeling rather than a well constructed argument. A papercut on a knuckle that can really undermine your confidence and unravel your opportunities.

So, instead of letting doubt get a free pass, lets unpack this emotion down to its lowest common denominator in order to not only understand it, but determine whether or not its substantiated.

1.) What is the source of the initial thought?

Sometimes, doubt is seeded. In which case, the character and motivation of the person who sends the doubt should always be considered. Many times, doubt is just a strategy to undermine your progress simply because they don’t want you to succeed.

Remember, jealousy is a thing. Those who struggle with jealousy may use undermining questions to get your nerves twisted or maybe, they use comparison tactics to lower your confidence. Either way, their motivation needs to be addressed and understood in order to transmute this type of doubt.

2.) I don’t know enough

Welp, there are two paths forward from this type of doubt. You could attain the knowledge and wisdom or work with someone you trust, who has both. Most often in entrepreneurship, we think we need to be the expert at all of the components of business in order to succeed. This isn’t to dissuade you from researching and studying to upgrade your own intellect, but if urgency and opportunity can’t wait, the most streamlined approach to winning is building an A-team.

The catch with building an amazing team is, you’ve got to be a great leader. Chances are, if you are moving forward with your idea, you’re already a leader. Leadership skills are worth every penny of investment. Start with accessing who you know that might already be an expert and see if they are already set up for consultancy, or another option is to enroll in a genre specific leadership mentorship program.

Reminder If you pursue the knowledge directly, don’t forget the wisdom needed to apply it.

3.) It’s been done before

So what.

Your experience, your perspective and your perception of the idea is exactly what those like you, want, need and/or desire. This type of doubt is typically caused by over comparison and analysis paralysis. Over comparison happens in research phase when you are checking out the “competition” or maybe your idea is a slight variation of something that is already popular. Don’t be afraid of a phased approach to development. Incremental momentum is the best way forward. After every action, take notes and ask for feedback from those who have your best interest at heart.

“Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.”

―Robert Schuller

It’s so easy to get sidelined by thoughts of fear and doubt. It happens to all of us at different seasons of our lives. I think of overcoming these undermining emotions like practicing hurdle jumping. In the beginning, fear might stop you from leaping and doubt might trip you up initially, but if you keep trying you might just be the best there ever was.

*I’ve never hurdle jumped but I imagine most people who tried it failed the first time.

repost from https://drlesley.beehiiv.com/

[constructionaccounting]

623: The Art Of Giving And Receiving Constructive Criticism In Construction

This Podcast Is Episode 623, And It's About The Art Of Giving And Receiving Constructive Criticism In Construction

Think about the last time you gave or received feedback. Did it inspire growth and improvement or leave someone feeling deflated? When done right, constructive feedback is a powerful tool for driving success. But it's a fine line – getting it wrong can do more harm than good.

  For business owners, managers, and team leaders, effectively giving and receiving constructive feedback isn't just a nice skill; it's a necessity. Feedback shapes stronger teams, builds trust, and moves companies forward. 

  In the construction industry, where projects are often complex and involve numerous stakeholders, giving and receiving constructive criticism is essential for success. Feedback can significantly impact safety, quality, and project timelines, making it crucial to foster a culture where constructive feedback is the norm rather than the exception.

  Understanding Constructive Criticism

Constructive criticism in construction focuses on performance, processes, and safety rather than personal attributes. It aims to highlight areas for improvement while providing actionable suggestions to enhance skills and procedures. This feedback cultivates a transparent work environment where team members feel empowered to address challenges without fear of personal confrontation.

Constructive Feedback vs. Destructive Criticism

Not all feedback is created equal. Constructive feedback is designed to promote growth. It's specific, actionable, and focuses on behavior or outcomes, not personal traits. Destructive criticism, on the other hand, often comes off as judgmental and unhelpful, targeting the person rather than the problem.

Consider these examples:

Constructive Criticism: I noticed a few inconsistencies in the framing of the last project. Let's review the measurements to improve them for the next build and ensure we're aligned. I believe this will help enhance the overall quality of the work and avoid any potential issues during inspections.

Destructive Criticism: The framing on that last job was terrible. You need to get it right, or this line of work isn't for you.

In the first example, the feedback focuses on improving the work and offers support, while the second example is judgmental and demoralizing, focusing solely on the individual's shortcomings.

Constructive feedback opens the door to improvement, while destructive criticism shuts down. By aligning feedback with a growth mindset, businesses can foster trust, encourage professional development, and build an environment where individuals and teams thrive.

Why Constructive Feedback Matters

Great feedback isn't just about pointing out mistakes – it's a catalyst for growth. Here's how constructive feedback benefits construction businesses:

Improves employee performance: Identifies strengths, weaknesses, and areas for improvement.

Enhances team dynamics: Encourages open communication and collaboration.

Builds trust and engagement: Employees feel valued when their growth is a priority.

Fosters continuous learning: Positioned as a tool for development, feedback encourages individuals to keep improving.

Drives business success: Growth at the individual level contributes directly to company goals.

Employees need to know their work matters, and constructive feedback signals that their success is tied to the business.

How to give constructive feedback effectively:

Providing great feedback takes preparation, empathy, and a strategic approach. Here's a breakdown of how to deliver it successfully:

1. Choose the right time and place

Deliver feedback privately where the person feels comfortable and safe to discuss openly. Avoid giving feedback in the heat of the moment; instead, allow emotions to settle so the conversation remains productive.

2. Be specific and focused

Vague feedback like "You need to do better" isn't helpful. Instead, reference specific situations and actions. For example, say, "During yesterday's client call, I noticed some confusion about the project timeline. Preparing a detailed overview beforehand might help in future calls."

3. Use "I" statements

Frame feedback with "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example:

Instead of "You're always interrupting me," say, "I felt interrupted during our meeting, and it made it difficult for me to express my points."

4. Balance positives and negatives

Use the feedback sandwich technique:

Start with a positive comment.

Address the area for improvement with actionable suggestions.

End with encouragement.

For example

Positive Comment: The team did an excellent job with the safety protocols on the last project. Everyone was vigilant about wearing helmets and harnesses, which helped create a safe work environment.

Area for Improvement: However, I noticed a few delays in material deliveries that could have been better managed. For future projects, let's improve our communication with suppliers to make sure everything gets on time, as this will help keep us on schedule.

Encouragement: Overall, I'm really impressed with everyone's dedication. If we can tighten up the logistics of material deliveries, we'll see even greater success on our projects. Keep up the great work!

This structure helps maintain morale while addressing areas for improvement, fostering a constructive atmosphere for the team.

5. Offer solutions and support

Feedback shouldn't just point out issues – it needs to provide solutions. For instance, suggest additional training, offer to share the workload, or brainstorm ideas together. This shows a commitment to the person's growth.

6. Follow up

Check in after the feedback conversation to see how the individual applies the advice. This shows that your feedback wasn't a one-off critique but part of an ongoing growth process.

Receiving constructive feedback positively:

Feedback is a two-way street. Learning to receive it with an open mind is just as crucial. Here's how to ensure you're extracting the most value from feedback:

1. Listen actively

When receiving feedback, focus on understanding rather than responding. Avoid interrupting or dismissing the feedback outright. Instead, paraphrase to confirm understanding, e.g., "I'm hearing that I should work on communicating deadlines more thoroughly. Is that correct?"

2. Avoid defensiveness

It can be tempting to explain away criticism, but doing so may make you seem resistant to growth. Accept feedback with humility and thank the individual for pointing out opportunities for improvement.

3. Reflect on the information

Take time to process the feedback before acting on it. Ask yourself:

What specific actions can I take to improve?

Is there a pattern in the feedback I've received?

How can I use this information to grow?

4. View feedback as an opportunity

Having a growth mindset is key. Look at feedback not as criticism but as an investment in your potential.

5. Implement changes

Feedback without action benefits no one. Develop a clear plan to address areas of improvement and track your progress.

Building A Feedback-Positive Environment

To truly unlock the power of feedback, create a culture where feedback is valued, sought after, and given freely.

Here's how:

To make feedback a regular part of your business culture, hold routine one-on-ones, team debriefs, or anonymous surveys.

Celebrate employees who both give and act on constructive feedback. This reinforces its value and shows that it's a tool for growth, not punishment.

When leaders seek and act on feedback, it sets the tone for the entire business. An open and transparent leadership style fosters a safe environment for feedback.

Equip managers and team members with the skills to give and receive feedback effectively. Training in conflict resolution, active listening, and emotional intelligence can be game-changing.

Final thoughts

By prioritizing constructive criticism, the construction industry can improve individual performances and enhance overall project outcomes, ensuring that teams work more effectively together and that projects are completed safely and on time.

Constructive feedback is more than a tool – it's a mindset. It encourages growth, builds trust, and empowers you to achieve your full potential. Whether you're delivering it to your team or receiving it from others, the key lies in empathy, clarity, and a focus on solutions.

Here's your actionable takeaway: Start small. Use the strategies in this blog to have one meaningful feedback conversation this week. Observe the impact, refine your approach, and make feedback a regular part of your leadership toolkit.

The benefits will cascade beyond your expectations – for your people and construction business.

About The Author:

Sharie DeHart, QPA, is the co-founder of Business Consulting And Accounting in Lynnwood, Washington. She is the leading expert in managing outsourced construction bookkeeping and accounting services companies and cash management accounting for small construction companies across the USA. She encourages Contractors and Construction Company Owners to stay current on their tax obligations and offers insights on managing the remaining cash flow to operate and grow their construction company sales and profits so they can put more money in the bank. Call 1-800-361-1770 or sharie@fasteasyaccounting.com

Check out this episode about Contractors Marketing - Accounting - Production (M.A.P.)!