#words in the banner come from some poem idk the name

[donghuamuqing]

✧ ❛ and thou couldst have it all

my empire of dirt ❜ ✧

[luvuwite]

all, go

i hate you

1. What was the last present you gave?

uMMMM probably a commission i gave to pancake (archie/vivi)

 2. What was the last present you received? 

i dunno? if its a doodle then i got that a week back!

3. What animal best represents your personality? 

from the oOoOO spirit animal tests i took im a snek

4. What are you most afraid of? 

sometimes my own mind EYES EMOJI

5. Who is your favourite villain? 

HMMMMMMM probably like,, megamind i love him

6. Who is your favourite family member? (we all have one, admit it)

MY SISTERRRR

7. If you could name your own planet what would it be called? 

myanus

8. Stars or Moon? 

stars!!

9. Do you have/want kinds? 

if my other partner wants them, sure

10. What is your greatest life goal? 

making it this far

11. What is something you can’t live without? 

soup

12. What is a place you associate with your childhood? 

one of the parks near the store-area

13. How was your first kiss/how would you like your first kiss to go? 

i never kissed, so i wouldn’t know, but pls,,,ask for consent,,, and warn me if we gonna kiss or not,,,,,

14. What is some life advice you have acquired? 

ive learned a lil’ bit, but one of em probably has to be to just be like,, dont cry over something you know is fake, at least thats what i remember atm HAHA

15. Who in history has influenced you? 

bruh i dont like history idk

16. What is something strange that you think about often? 

h,,,hopless romantic noISIJEIORQ AHHAHA i like to think about weird scenarios in my head basically

17. Baths or Showers? 

showrr i get shy with myself in baths

18. Tea of Coffee? 

coffee

19. Alcohol or soft drink? 

alchohol bad brisk brisk brisk

20. Writing or typing? 

typing since its easier

21. What is you most favourite thing in your bedroom? 

my bed its sexy and comfy

22. Spontaneous holiday! Where are you going and with who? 

wait what UH I DONT KNOW probably just close close friends and family

23. Introverted or Extraverted? 

i have my moments with both

24. Describe yourself in two words. 

small and aggressive

31. What do you think of when you hear ‘portrait’? 

a picture or image of someone/something

32. Tell me about your partner/ideal partner? 

i mean no one is perfect yeah? i just want them to be honest with me and accept my AHEM struGGLES with relationships since im not the best partner

33. Tell me about your siblings, if you have any? 

my sister is what you call a “girly girl”, she likes disney movies, outdoors, being loud and running around, yknow just like any other child ever

35. What are you a big advocate for? 

my friends!!

36. If you’re comfortable to answer, what is the sickest you have ever been?

migraine + stomach bug + mental in trash +  stomach pains + lil appendix pain

37. When were you the most scared in your life? 

when i broke my arm

38. Ever had a paranormal experience? 

ACTUALLY YEAH i thought i heard someone yelling help outside my window and i peaked out and realized it was nothing and i figured i was just tired but i was still kinda freaked

39. Biggest celebrity crush at the moment? 

im not like other girls,,,,....

40. What is something happening in your life right now? 

uhhh just general anxiousness/paranoia(?) tbh

41. What is your favourite mythological creature? 

DRAAAAGOOOOOON

42. Marvel or DC?

dont know what those are

43. What object would be on your family’s banner? 

soup

44. Favourite flower? 

pink rose

45. One characteristic you like in a partner? 

s,,,support/reassurance pls

46. What planet/star would you travel to if it were possible? 

i wanna,,,, actually i dont know i think i would just enjoy floating around in general 

47. What is your favourite meal… ever? 

soup

48. First time…. doing anything. Describe your first time doing something? 

first time i drew was twiggit sperkl and that was the most proudest i ever felt

49. Who is your favourite superhero? 

bRUHHH I DUNNO I DONT WATCH THAT STUF

50. What is your favourite poem? Recite it?

i dont read

51. What is an exercise you despise doing. 

burpees

52. Secret talent? 

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

fite

53. Current song on replay replay replay? 

[x]

55. If you weren’t in your current occupation what would you be doing? 

sleeping probably

56. What is the first thing you notice about the person you fancy?

,,y,yo they kinda,,,, scrumptious,,, AHUIWRWQI 

57. If you had one wish that would definitely come true, what would it be? 

yes

58. If you could time travel, when and where would you visit? 

i would go to future bc i wanna see what i look like

59. What is your lucky number? 

5

60. If you adopt a pet what would it be and what would you name it? 

a cat!! and i actually am planning a name and calling them clementine!! 

61. Do you believe in fate/everything happens for a reason?

i believe your fate is decided by ur own actions/words

 62. What is your favourite thing about your personality? 

im not too hard to get along with,, i hope

63. What is your favourite thing about your appearance? 

uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

64. What is your favourite clothing store? 

primark bc everything is like 2 bucks

65. What is your favourite online store? 

i dont do online shopping too much

66. Use one word to describe your most favourite person? 

observant 

67. How do you usually have your hair?

down with a clip, then ponytail next day

 68. What was your favourite subject in high school? 

math

69. What makes you feel empowered? 

power over something/someone(as a joke/in games, not in a bad way)

70. What motivates you to do something? 

a prize at the end

71. What advice would you give someone who is going through a rough time? 

it gets worse before it gets better, and in the worse ill be there for you so you dont have to go through this alone

72. Ideal date? 

wendys!!! sweater weather!!! cuddle!!! left 4 dead!!! comfy clothes!!!

73. What is the best date night movie? 

i am not that attractive to be taken out on a date

74. What is something you are currently looking forward to? 

nothing atm tbh im just here bc i have to beIEOJRWIOE

75. Tell me a funny joke? 

oo wa oh wa ooh

76. Do you like musicals? If so, what’s your favourite? 

never listened to one actually

77. What is your favourite song currently? 

sweater weather. always.

78. What song never fails to make you dance? 

POP EYED JOEEEEE IVE BEEN LIVING???? LONG TIME YOOO

79. What is your favourite “classic?”

gnomeo and juliet

 80. What is the best advice you have ever been given? 

obese paragraph and comfort doodles? lets go

81. Where did you ancestors come from? 

puerto rico

82. What have you learned from your parents/guardians? 

be tough nugget and dont take shit seriously till you have to

83. What is a phrase you heard a lot growing up? 

dont step on the crack or youll break ur mothers back

84. Do you believe in magic? 

nnno

85. What reminds you of your best friend? 

overwatch

86. What are you passionate about? 

dance dance dance

87. Tell me a story from middle school? 

one time

the end

88. Who was your favourite teacher and why?

i love my bio teacher rn bro shes such a sweetheart

 89. Can you roll your tongue? 

yes

90. What made you pursue what you are studying? (including school subjects) 

my little pony

91. Where would you like to travel to? 

japan for those toys gimme gimme

92. What is something on your bucket-list? 

i wanna see coral reef

93. What is home to you? 

place that brings feeling of comfort/security

94. What do you do in your free time? 

draw

95. If you could buy anything right now, what would it be? 

food

96. If you could see anyone, living or dead, right now, who would it be? 

probs one of my online friends

97. If you could choose, what would your last meal be? 

soup dumplings brisk and rice

98. How would you like to die? 

happy

99. List five of your favourite pieces of art (paintings, books, songs etc) 

ruby eyes / sweater weather / ponyo / wall-e / idk

100. What would you change about this world?

global warming SHOOO U FAT

[beccaboosthings]

1-99 for the random asks 😂💛

This is long so its below the cut 💖

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

(In no specific order) Crush-Tessa Violet, Choke-IDKHBTFM, Still Waiting-Sum 41, I Write Sins-P!ATD, Addicted-Simple Plan, Human-dodie

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Does my gf count? Even tho we have only met in person once?

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“You again?” Jared says (page 23 doesn’t have 17 lines so i continued onto the next page)

4: What do you think about most?

My Gf

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

“I love you from” my gf

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

With

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I can do this

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are perfect. Boys are hot too. I’m v bi

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Nope

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Years ago

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

I wouldn’t say that its a phobia but being buried alive

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

Nope

13: What’s your religion?

Atheist but if i were to be religious it would be christian 

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Walking my dog

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Panic! At The Disco

17: What was the last lie you told?

That I was okay

18: Do you believe in karma?

Not really

19: What does your URL mean?

Its my name

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

I would say both would be my empathy and wanting to help everyone. Like obviously its an amazing thing, but i also end up taking it too far sometimes and I end up forgetting to take care of myself. And I put others before me far too often.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

I have like a full list, but Mike Faist

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Nope

23: How do you vent your anger?

Crying

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

Tickets from a bunch of different random stuff

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Video Chat

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Yes?

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

Hate: Fingernails on jeans Love: Rain

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if thing never change

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Ghosts: Kinda, Aliens: Hell yes. There is no way we are the only ones in this whole universe

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

Right: My fidget cube Left: an Eiffel Tower picture

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

My shampoo

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

I have no clue haha

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

East

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Brendan Urie

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

To make a difference. Even if its just in one persons life, or something super small.

36: Define Art.

Someone expressing something (feeling, emotions, ect.) through a creative medium

37: Do you believe in luck?

Kinda

38: What’s the weather like right now?

Freezing (its 29°F or -1.6°C currently)

39: What time is it?

12:43am

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

Nope, I don’t drive

41: What was the last book you read?

Dear Evan Hansen the Novel

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yes? Sometimes

43: Do you have any nicknames?

Bec, angel, baby, babe, ect from my gf

44: What was the last film you saw?

Heathers

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

I broke my tailbone when I was like 10 and it still hurts if I ever sit or stand for too long.

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Yes

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

the DEH novel

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Bisexual

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

No

50: Do you believe in magic?

No

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

No. The is only one person who hurt me super badly who i still refuse to talk to because I’m still mad even tho its been years

52: What is your astrological sign?

Aries

53: Do you save money or spend it?

Both

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

The DEH novel

55: Love or lust?

Love

56: In a relationship?

Yes 💖

57: How many relationships have you had?

2 but the first doesn’t really count

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

No

59: Where were you yesterday?

Home all day

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Yes my pencil case

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

No

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Dogs

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I don’t really have one? I guess my niceness 

64: Where is your best friend?

At her house

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

(In no specific order) @slowtownstan​ @woildismyerster @daveyjacobss @robot-anon @meangirlsx

66: What is your heritage?

I’m Half English, a quarter French Canadian, and a quarter of just a bunch of random shit

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Talking to my gf

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

I have never thought of this and now I’m super curious. idk tho haha

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

Yes

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

Yes

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Save the dog. I don’t care if I get fired. If my boss has a problem with it then fuck them. I’m not letting a dog die over a job

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

A) I would tell my family and close friends B) I would go spend time with my gf and do some fun shit with her and my friends C) Yes but No. Yes I would over all be scared, but tbh I never really thought I would ever even get this far in life

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Trust

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Carrying The Banner from Newsies

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

Okay I’m not doing this one haha

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Trust and communication 

77: How can I win your heart?

Being honest about your feelings and just being nice

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

Yes

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Starting talking to @slowtownstan

80: What size shoes do you wear?

9-10s

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

I have no clue haha

82: What is your favourite word?

Fuck. Its so universal and can be used in so many ways

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Blood

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

I love you to my gf

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Do it all the time by IDKHBTFM

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Currently Purple and Black

87: What is your current desktop picture?

This

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

Idk, a serial killer or something

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

What really are the depressive thoughts that go through your head everyday?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Get the fuck out of there

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Mind reading

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

Something fun from my childhood

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

All of my depression

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

Does Mike Faist count? Because him or dodie

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

London

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

Not currently

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

No?

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yes

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

You matter, whatever fight you are fighting, you can get through this. Things will get better. I know it sounds cheesy but its all true.

[nisitime]

1. What was the last present you gave?

a lego 2. What was the last present you received?

a plushie 3. What animal best represents your personality?

panda 4. What are you most afraid of?

not being happy 5. Who is your favourite villain?

i dont think i have one 6. Who is your favourite family member? (we all have one, admit it)

my brother 7. If you could name your own planet what would it be called?

Boggi 8. Stars or Moon?

stars 9. Do you have/want kids?

want 10. What is your greatest life goal?

having a chill life 11. What is something you can’t live without?

love 12. What is a place you associate with your childhood?

nowhere 13. How was your first kiss/how would you like your first kiss to go?

on a bench next to my house 14. What is some life advice you have acquired?

dont stress it 15. Who in history has influenced you?

no one 16. What is something strange that you think about often?

how many spiders have i eaten? 17. Baths or Showers?

shower always 18. Tea of Coffee?

Coffee 19. Alcohol or soft drink?

yes 20. Writing or typing?

writing 21. What is you most favourite thing in your bedroom?

bed 22. Spontaneous holiday! Where are you going and with who?

japan matsuri and idk 23. Introverted or Extraverted?

Introverted 24. Describe yourself in two words.

tired potato 25. A song that always puts you in a good mood.

nhé 26. What makes you feel?

27. What was your favourite concert?

dont really go to concerts 28. Any plans for a tattoo?

no 29. What was the first book you ever read?

something for school prolly 30. What was the first movie you saw in cinemas?

101 dalmatians i think? 31. What do you think of when you hear ‘portrait’?

drawing 32. Tell me about your partner/ideal partner?

caring 33. Tell me about your siblings, if you have any?

my brother is like my guardian angel and i love him 34. What is a topic you would like to talk about more?

hunger games and smite 35. What are you a big advocate for?

respect and love 36. If you’re comfortable to answer, what is the sickest you have ever been?

i still have suicide thougths 37. When were you the most scared in your life?

when the love of my life tried to kill himself in front of me 38. Ever had a paranormal experience?

no 39. Biggest celebrity crush at the moment?

Kevin from Call me Kevin 40. What is something happening in your life right now?

being ‘’stuck’’ at home is amazing 41. What is your favourite mythological creature?

faun 42. Marvel or DC?

dc 43. What object would be on your family’s banner?

idk 44. Favourite flower?

lilly of the valley 45. One characteristic you like in a partner?

cuddly 46. What planet/star would you travel to if it were possible?

none 47. What is your favourite meal… ever?

lasanha do senhor eduardo 48. First time…. doing anything. Describe your first time doing something?

first time kissing was so damn weird 49. Who is your favourite superhero?

Dick Grayson as Nightwing 50. What is your favourite poem? Recite it?

dont have one 51. What is an exercise you despise doing.

running 52. Secret talent?

pretending im fine 53. Current song on replay replay replay?

honest from tessa violet 54. Recommend me anything. Seriously… anything.

light up a cactie scented candle 55. If you weren’t in your current occupation what would you be doing?

playing the flute 56. What is the first thing you notice about the person you fancy?

the good mood 57. If you had one wish that would definitely come true, what would it be?

that me and the ppl related to me (chosen by me) would be able to live a life without any kind of problems 58. If you could time travel, when and where would you visit?

i wouldnt 59. What is your lucky number?

i dont have one 60. If you adopt a pet what would it be and what would you name it?

i already have pets 61. Do you believe in fate/everything happens for a reason?

no and yes 62. What is your favourite thing about your personality?

caring 63. What is your favourite thing about your appearance?

hips 64. What is your favourite clothing store?

C&A 65. What is your favourite online store?

ali express 66. Use one word to describe your most favourite person?

bear 67. How do you usually have your hair?

messy 68. What was your favourite subject in high school?

music 69. What makes you feel empowered?

being a priority 70. What motivates you to do something?

time 71. What advice would you give someone who is going through a rough time?

its only the end if you want it to be 72. Ideal date?

something simple 73. What is the best date night movie?

anything 74. What is something you are currently looking forward to?

being better 75. Tell me a funny joke?

76. Do you like musicals? If so, what’s your favourite?

i do, rn the hamilton 77. What is your favourite song currently?

boys like u by dodie clark 78. What song never fails to make you dance?

none 79. What is your favourite “classic?”

Spring by beethoven n5 80. What is the best advice you have ever been given?

do good and good will come to u 81. Where did you ancestors come from?

idk 82. What have you learned from your parents/guardians?

ill always be bby 83. What is a phrase you heard a lot growing up?

’’dont touch it’’ 84. Do you believe in magic?

no 85. What reminds you of your best friend?

nothing in particular 86. What are you passionate about?

drawing 87. Tell me a story from middle school?

a guy said he liked me and i was really worried because he was my friend and i didnt want him to be upset but i didnt liked him that way, was a big deal for me but i was honest and told him i only liked him as a friend and he brushed it off like it was nothing and the next day he did the same thing to another girl ._. 88. Who was your favourite teacher and why?

art history teacher from highschool 89. Can you roll your tongue?

no 90. What made you pursue what you are studying? (including school subjects)

its something i can do alone and im happy 91. Where would you like to travel to?

japan 92. What is something on your bucket-list?

a new backpack 93. What is home to you?

somewhere where i feel safe 94. What do you do in your free time?

draw 95. If you could buy anything right now, what would it be?

a home 96. If you could see anyone, living or dead, right now, who would it be?

dad 97. If you could choose, what would your last meal be?

LASANHA DO SENHOR EDUARDO 98. How would you like to die?

quick 99. List five of your favourite pieces of art (paintings, books, songs etc)

anything from Mookie Justice league by jim lee the into the spiderverse movie Bakuman Anime oyasumi punpun manga 100. What would you change about this world?

peoples mindset

[kacheeking]

the lost years/months/days

haven’t revisited/thought about things that I’ve been reading on my own terms for a while, but this was the last time I was taking note roughly from July 2015 to May 2016: 

no. 3 shit i’ve been reading: circa march 2016

Fasting Girls: The History of Anorexia Nervosa – Joan Jacobs Brumberg (Found this incredibly illuminating re: sainthood and 16/17th century starvation in the name of religion. Made me think more about the intersections of appetite, power, religion and how this came to a head in that age. The Victorian era sections were also really interesting, I think since I’ve never thought specifically about how food and physical appetite came into the picture even though I’ve known so much about social mores of the time and how that would have been in line? I think reading this overall, esp when they started getting closer to the modern age, I just held this sheer sense of being appalled by medical practice and how eating disorders were treated, viewed and patients subjected to unfair/uncomfortable/even dangerous power dynamics. Feel like it’s so difficult to be a woman, though it’s improving, and my feminist self balked at so much that went on in the book re: this screwed up relationship between physical appetite (sexual and food-related), madonna-whore complexes, freedoms and rebellions and how in the face of so much external pressure women turn inwards and into and on themselves.)

Living Beautifully – Pema Chodron (Last Buddhist book that we had to read for class as part of a course that aimed at understanding the conception of “self” through various lenses e.g. psychoanalytic, evolutionary-biology, religious, etc. Still struggle to reconcile a lot of Buddhist concepts with the reality of a modern nation-state framework that we have to live in. Can see its merits on an individual level but in class, was agitated when the professor seemed to dismiss/relegate discussions of privilege, and power to the sidelines, or equate sufferings that in my mind seem absolutely incompatible. Maybe I’m not “enlightened” yet? Maybe I don’t want to be.)

Brave New World – Aldous Huxley (Liked this more than other sci-fi that i’ve picked up. Can see why it’s a “classic”. also read this at a time when i was very much alone/wanted the experience of solitude. want to pick up more sci-fi in future, wondering why i was biased against this genre in the past??)

Devotional Poems – Joe Hall (didn’t seem clean enough, like some phrases were superfluous/didn’t add anything to the force of a poem. a lot of imagery, sound and fury but with no object or point. cacophonous but i didn’t enjoy this collection)

Once in the West – Christian Wiman (really enjoyed this. at first was disappointed – somehow poems that have monosyllable lines or single word lines strike me as irregular/ineffective (?) but this is unwarranted bias i suppose because a lot of the poems ended up having an unexpected resonance. reading wiman and also other poets in class i think you gain an appreciation for what objectively good poetry is. people say that art is subjective but that’s some bullshit at least at the preliminary stages because being an editor for a creative literary magazine i have read a LOT of bad writing and it is clearly not subjective. anyway, what was i on? always enjoy religious/devotional poetry specifically, and most of the time it is circa 16th/17th century, but wiman combines the modernist poetic aesthetic with something enduring and that always wins me over.)

Why be happy when you can be normal? – Jeanette Winterson (read this over two days, and by that i mean it took slightly over 2+/3 hours to get through it all maybe? incredibly easy to read which was why it went so quickly. liked this a lot and want to read more by winterson)

Nobody is ever missing – Catherine Lacey (read this over three days but grew more exasperated as it progressed. think i’m done with self-indulgence/characters who i perceive as self-indulgent. there is more draw for me, now, i think, to contemplate urgencies to others instead of urgencies only to yourself. i want to read not about escapism but about handling ties to history, ties to others, ties that threaten to envelope you but also uplift. this novel was about a woman who leaves a decent life to stay in a sullen silent space of isolation and somehow i cannot accept that anymore.)

numero dos: shit i’ve been reading circa jan 2016

Completed

The Bone Clocks – David Mitchell (i liked this and the fact that david mitchell writes so comfortably and well about/when placing his narrative in irish/english contexts. re: this book, i guess we handle/respond to mortality differently. the dystopian end made me think about wanting to recycle/be more environmentally-conscious) – January

Civilization and its discontents – Sigmund Freud (read this for class, again with all freud that i’ve read, some resonates and some i call total bullshit on (everything related to his gender theory tbh).

Man’s Search for Himself – Rollo May (read this for class. every time i read something approximating insightful about self-knowledge i somehow find a crack of doubt that then spreads across the text. there was a short segment about physicality and self-consciousness that i could see be true (and even then only in my context), but i lie in the crevice and believe that the self is unknowable so maybe this class is really just an exercise in futility 4 me?)

A General Theory of Love – Lewis et. al. (read for class again. Generally found this interesting, esp because it put a scientific spin on a theory of attachment and human connection. felt like the presence of objective science, though that is debatable, gave credence to the kind of subjective emotions we have all felt, and so was comforting in some small way.)

February: The Moral Animal – Robert Wright (for class again. basically an evolutionary biology perspective/explanation of morality. Interesting to see but idk, something about attributing so many things/our choices, etc. to biology feels inherently…wrong? but maybe that’s his point.)

Mlodinow, Leonard. Subliminal: How Your Unconscious Mind Rules Your Behavior (fascinating but Mlodinow jumps around a lot when writing and it makes me less inclined to believe him?)

What the Buddha Taught – Rahula (feel like the more I read about Buddhism, the more confused I am esp wrt to its metaphysical concepts. felt like a good introduction to something that’s been familiar all my life but i’ve never gotten to know intellectually. but there is something inherent about “unknowable” concepts that may be just shy of religious concepts, but still unacceptable to me)

Four Quartets – TS Eliot (probably one of the best collections of poetry that i’ve ever read. eliot goes into abstractions but grapples with the heart of the matter and there is anguish and brazen honesty and no hesitance to be ugly if that makes sense. need to reread this, probably aloud)

The Monk and the Philosopher – jean-françois revel, matthieu ricard (complicates/simplifies the ideas of buddhism? I can’t quite make up my mind. but the comparison to philosophy and subjecting it to the kind of ‘scientific’ and dialectical method was useful for me to understand it further. that is, beyond metaphors. side note: am q taken with this format of prose—conversation printed)

shit i’ve been reading circa July 2015 

Not that kind of girl – Lena Dunham (felt pretentious at a lot of points) – July

The diving bell and the butterfly – Jean Dominique Bauby (quite good) – July

Madness – Marya Hornbacher (this made me cry) -July

Eat and Run – Scott Jurek (motivation to run as all books about running are) – July

AWOL on the Appalachian trail – David Miller (gets boring if you haven’t been to the AT)

The Omnivore’s Dilemma – Michael Pollen (liked this. made me think about my choices and the exact ethical structure behind it – read also: consider the lobster by david foster wallace for a similar/alternative perspective) – August

What I talk about when I talk about running – Haruki Murakami (long time coming to read this, perfect short prose about the draw of running. feel like most people who enjoy running and associate it with thinking/contemplation will get it) – August

Bad feminist – Roxane Gay (brutal at points, beautiful mostly) – August

Under the banner of heaven – Jon Krakauer (this was incredible. well-researched and comprehensive but extremely smooth narrative about mormon fundamentalism.) – September

Valley of the Dolls – Jacqueline Susann (enjoyed this) – September

Consider the Lobster – David Foster Wallace (title essay is a gem, the rest ranged from obscure to mildly intriguing) – September

Everything I Never Told You – Celeste Ng (above average) – November

The People’s Republic of Amnesia – Louis Lim (emotional reporting, slated to go one way, but expectedly so) – November

History of Chinese Philosophy – Wing-Tsit Chan (need to reread, slowly, and in detail)

Drinking: A Love Story – Caroline Knapp (well-written and need to stop reading memoirs on vice/transferable behaviours) – November

Modern Romance – Aziz Ansari (ok. choice) – November

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius – Dave Eggers (liked this a lot, eggers has great arrogant style that works) – December

Slade House – David Mitchell (perfect short read. thrilling. fantasy.) – December

Fates and Furies – Lauren Groff (liked this but it ) – December

The Wind-up Bird Chronicle – Haruki Murakami (took a while to get into, but enjoyed this, esp folding routines that appeared in the book into my mind. there is a quietness that steals its way through the pages when the protagonist makes his sandwiches, thinks, goes deep into dry wells) – December