#word bearer fans eating well with these short stories

[ask-the-crimson-king]

I have a few select passages that are my favorites which I'll be putting under a cut for spoilers in case others wish to experience this wonderful story for themselves.

 ‘It is simple, chirurgeon. I need a new face,’ Erebus said, as he pulled the man closer to the ruined mask of his own. The chirurgeon could smell the Dark Apostle’s breath, hot and rancid, even over the metallic stench of blood. ‘I will take yours,’ Erebus growled. ‘But, my lord,’ the chirurgeon stammered, falling backwards as Erebus loosened his grip on his neck. He rubbed at his throat, his voice still hoarse. ‘I fear such a procedure would kill me.’ ‘Then you must give thanks to the gods directly,’ Erebus said conversationally to the cowering man as he sat up on the stone slab. ‘That your sacrifice may be in my name.’

[. . .]

‘Behold,’ he said. ‘The new face of your–’ Erebus screamed as his face caught fire. Black flame sparked under the new skin, turning fat and flesh to ash in an instant, a total rejection of the unwilling donor’s gift. The Dark Apostle clawed at his skull, tearing stitches and skin alike as he fought to free himself from the torture. ‘Too late!’ Erebus howled, and he ran from the agony, springing from the stone slab and staggering out of the apothecarion, still scraping with wild fingers at his flaming skull.

Erebus saying "I am taking your face" and then it immediately literally bursting into flames is a type of comedy I didn't know I needed in 40k. Genuinely hilarious and also terrifying.

A bird, flying impossibly through the void, so small, so fragile against the infinite black. It beat its wings to escape, but Erebus knew the realm of daemons better than any other alive, and he caught it easily. He cradled it in his tattooed hands. It was tiny in his grasp, like a child’s toy, and he could feel its heartbeat: an irregular rhythm that was never the same twice. The bird looked at him with eyes like gemstones, one the purest blue, the other topaz yellow. A name. ‘Your kind cannot resist sharing your knowledge,’ Erebus said. ‘So you hide it, somewhere small, somewhere hard to find.’ He stroked the bird’s plumage with his thumb. ‘But I am very good at finding things that others cannot, and I am very patient. I also know the most important question to ask.’ He asked that question now, and held the bird to his ear, to hear its answer. It spoke a single word with a single voice, as quiet as a wish. Erebus would have smiled, had he possessed lips. Instead, with a skull’s rictus grin, he snapped the bird’s neck with two fingers, and spoke the word it had told him.

Love this mainly for the description of this delicate little bird. It's cute.

He brought his hand upwards, feeling at the meat of his face, and found a shifting, squirming mass of flesh. He rose, and called to his acolytes. ‘Mirror!’ A hooded figure returned with a jewel-embedded mirror, its silver handle carved with runes. Erebus looked into its depths, and saw the reward of his trials: not just the services of powerful allies, but the power of the Four, represented in the visage of one. He had seen this before – as a child, in the deserts of Colchis. Now that prophecy had come true. Eyes that could see futures yet to pass. Ears that rang with the beat of the Blood God’s war drums. A mouth that ached for the rarest tastes. A nose for death in all its forms. With his new face, Erebus smiled.

The ending is just wonderful. I enjoy it greatly. Love the phrasing in particular.

The entire story goes SO hard honestly. Love it to pieces. I didn't know what to expect when I saw it as part of the advent thing but MAN. Nails his character and answers a question I had kinda hand waved as "oh Warp magic" in SUCH a fascinating and amazing way.

y’all… I can’t believe I have lived to see honest to god Horus/Erebus old man yaoi in my black library. I have won. Forever

[goldenkamuyhunting]

Ramblings and crazy theory time about GK chap 275 “Tokyo Love Story”

So we’ve a new chapter and I’ve discovered…

Yeah, the fake Yuusaku theory turned out right and wrong at the same time as we’ve someone posing as Yuusaku… but it’s definitely not how I was expecting things to be.

But whatever, let’s start.

We’re in Kanagawa, in 1901. The scene is placed after the one in chap 35, when Toraji and Sugimoto fight the night of Toraji’s marriage, because Toraji is afraid Sugimoto came back to snatch Umeko away from him.

Since Sugimoto’s father died in 1899 according to the official timeline, this confirms Sugimoto waited 2 years before coming back to his village.

Evidently the two have calmed down because they aren’t fighting anymore and Toraji is asking Sugimoto where will he do now. Sugimoto informs him his father told him to search for a place he can be happy. You might not remember this bit being included in chap 236 because it was a volume addition.

Sugimoto says he wants to go to Tokyo, since up until now he was in places with few people, which makes sense since he feared he was infected with tuberculosis.

In the Q&A section from the Golden Kamuy fan book it was said:

Q8: What did Sugimoto do in the 2 years between leaving the village after burning his house and coming back to Ume’s wedding? Noda: He travelled to places such as Tokyo and Kyoto. [translation here]

But it’s likely Noda means Sugimoto didn’t stay in the big cities, but in the areas around them.

So okay, we move to Tokyo and after getting a glimpse of Sugimoto moving overly excited through the city playing ‘singing in the rain’...

...we see him being involved in a fight with more than 10 candidate officers.

Kikuta is called in to stop the fight. Evidently they forced him to interrupt his meal as he is still holding chopsticks and a bowl of rice.

We learn from the info box that Kikuta, full name Kikuta Mokutarou, was at the time a Sergeant in the 1st division (which tells us in his future he was promoted and transferred in another division, the 7th in fact in 1902 he’s working for Tsurumi during the Koito kidnapping), in charge of instructing and providing guidance to the officer candidate students enrolled at the Imperial Japanese Army Academy.

He’s also keeping his hair short and there’s no facial hair on his face, giving him a much more proper appearance than the one he’ll have later on, although he keeps his uniform unbuttoned, which is less proper.

As Kikuta tells at the rather bruised officer candidate students to stop fighting as it’s disgraceful for them, they protest they can’t let Sugimoto go as he’s dangerous while Sugimoto, completely restrained by their weight, seems to bark and growl like a wild dog. Kikuta offers him his bowl of rice and this gets Sugimoto to calm down as he starts eating the rice.

LOL, Noda couldn’t have made more obvious with this scene that Ogata and Sugimoto fight like cat and dog because THEY ARE A STRAY CAT AND A STRAY DOG.

Kikuta comments that by how it took such a huge number of students to stop him, he expected Sugimoto to be some sort of monster… but now he thinks Sugi can be of some use for him, so he tells the students he’ll take him and tells Sugimoto to follow him as he’ll get him something to eat.

As they eat Sugimoto confesses he got into the fight because the students glared at him, revealing quite a horrible temper. Kikuta points out how his was a stupid reason to start a fight, asking him if he’s a STRAY DOG (ノラ犬 ‘nora inu’). This leads him to nickname Sugimoto “vagrant boy" (ノラ坊 ‘nora bou’), warning him Sugimoto was lucky Kikuta got in between the fight, because otherwise, if the students had managed to take him away, Sugimoto would have been in deep troubles.

As Sugimoto asks why he’s called in such a way, Kikuta explains it’s due to the norabou vegetables that grow in his area. Kikuta then proceeds to explain that there’s an officer candidate in the army named Hanazawa Yuusaku, son of the commander of the 7th division.

Kikuta wants Sugimoto to take his place. So okay, it’s a chapter in which we’ve a fake Yuusaku… only he’s not the one I was expecting.

Kikuta then proceeds to explain how Hanazawa ‘I’m the worst father of the century’ Koujirou, wants his son to become the regimental flag bearer because whoever cares about the high death rate of flag bearer when he can gain more honour through Yuusaku?

Yuusaku’s mom, Hanazawa Hiro, from whom Yuusaku got his nose and, probably, his eyes, doesn’t like the idea of her son being used as cannon fodder for her husband’s glory,

but know better than to say it out loud and also know it would be a crime to murder her husband so she did the next best thing, she plotted against him, secretly contacting a “marriage agency” in Tokyo so as to find a girl desperate enough to get a husband she would be willing to steal Yuusaku’s virginity (you might remember virginity is a fundamental requisite for a flag bearer), Kaneko Kaeko, daughter of an executive in the Mitsubishi Zaibatsu.

If the name Mitsubishi feels familiar to you yet it doesn’t make you think of a car, it’s probably because we already had to deal with someone from the Mitsubishi in the Igogusa/Harumi Chiyo story.

In GK it seems people from Mitsubishi are always desperate to get married... it makes you wonder if Tsurumi had a hand in this mess as well or it’s just a coincidence...

Sugimoto, who’s poor, doesn’t get why a rich girl would be desperate to find a man, so Kikuta explains him her potential partners wouldn’t care about her being rich as they’re rich as well.

Overall Sugimoto ends up on showing again how he’s not very good at placing himself in the shoes of people of upper classes.

Turns out though Hanazawa figured out how his wife his plotting behind his back and tried to plot behind her back as well, asking the help of the commander of the 1st division, whom he trusts, who passed the job to Kikuta (I guess Kikuta might still be loyal to his former commander, which might be he’s okay with plotting against Tsurumi... or was he sent there specifically to do so? We’ll see...).

Anyway Sugimoto, who’s so NOT FAMOUS for sitting around a table and having a honest discussion with people, asks why they didn’t just do that. Really, Sugimoto, if you know talking can solve problems why don’t you try implementing it?

Kikuta replies the things had gotten too far and they’re afraid this could cause an incident that will affect the morale of the division, and, more importantly, could put Hanazawa’s wife patriotism into discussion and this would SURELY reflect bad on Hanazawa who was already willing to sacrifice his son on the altar of his own honour.

To all those who’re reading my meta for the first time, in case you’re wondering no, I don’t like Hanazawa. Not one single bit. Sorry for being biased against him.

Anyway Sugimoto gets a haircut and then Kikuta has him wear an uniform with some stars on the collar so as to make him look like a candidate officer.

Sugimoto wonders why Kikuta picked him and isn’t just using another candidate officer. I don’t know if this is relevant but Kikuta seems thoughtfull when Sugimoto says so, his hat slightly shadowing his face.

Hopefully this doesn’t mean this deception is going to put Sugimoto in serious troubles.

He then explains Sugimoto if they were to use someone from the army they would risk bad rumours about the Hanazawa to spread around.

Kikuta then comments that Sugimoto, wearing the full uniform, looks good as there’s a touch of elegance on his face that can help him impersonate Hanazawa Yuusaku, son of a high-class general. I wonder if this is meant to foreshadow Sugimoto is actually more than the commoner we believe him to be or if it’s just another way to inform us Sugimoto is good looking, in case we’ve missed it.

Sugimoto wonders if, by joining the army, he wouldn’t have to worry about food anymore and I facepalm here because really, if this is what pushed him to join, he really made a poor decision, but his expression as he talks makes me wonder if he’s just being so very naive I kind of feel bad for him... did he really have no idea what joining the army could include?

His words cause Kikuta to remember his younger brother, apparently sick, telling him to take the army cap back with him.

I guess Kikuta is kind of adopting all those young men, Ariko, Sugimoto, maybe even Nikaidou and Ogata, because he lost his younger brother.

It’s interesting how Noda shadows his face here...

Anyway Kikuta proceeds to educate Sugimoto, as he’ll have to be capable to eat great food at a fancy restaurant. So, once Kikuta thinks Sugimoto is ready as he mastered enough good table manners, a nervous Sugimoto can take part to the marriage interview… where Kikuta discovers with horror they served western cuisine… with Sugimoto being completely ignorant about western etiquette and trying to eat the shrimps using two forks… and Kikuta, who’s pecking through the window while being seated on a tree, panics, thinking he’ll be discovered immediately.

Well, that’s all for this chapter.

It was undoubtedly a fun flashback chapter that reveals that the fake Yuusaku theory wasn’t completely baseless… but definitely not what I expected it to turn out as I would have never guessed Sugimoto impersonated Yuusaku.

On another note this give me additional fun when I think at this scene.

Sugimoto should have been thinking at the time he played the high ranking officer, here... though I guess the idea is that Kaeko didn’t immediately recognize him because she’s not in the army? Didn’t they gave her a photo of Yuusaku? Sugimoto’s nose and probably his eyebrows too are different.

We’ll see.

I don’t dare to think Kaneko is also a fake sent, this time, by Tsurumi, to steal Yuusaku’s virginity because Tsurumi doesn’t want Yuusaku among them.

This would just be too crazy.

On more serious topics we can assume now that Kikuta saying Sugimoto to forget about Yuusaku in the previous chapter is due to the interview failing and Yuusaku now being forced to become a flag bearer, high mortality rate and all and the whole fake Yuusaku thing having to remain a secret between the two of them so likely Sugimoto doesn’t know anything dark about Yuusaku… beyond the fact his father wanted to use him as cannon fodder to increase his own prestige but whatever, I hardly think someone could have missed it.

I find rather fun how Noda isn’t really fond of drawing Hanazawa, he’s just using the same image of him over and over… and how instead he had no problems showing us Yuusaku’s mom, name and all, but we still have to see Yuusaku’s face. Really, I can’t wait for the big reveal.

Oh well, we can only wait and see.

[aboveallarescuer]

Dany and Missandei’s relationship

This is a list of all the passages from the books featuring key moments in Dany and Missandei’s relationship.

Here is what some casual fans think of their relationship:

She has consistently appeared to forget about the people she’s conquered beyond their capacity to serve and obey her. And sure, Missandei is her best friend, but she’s essentially a token on Game of Thrones, meant to be a stand-in for the Unsullied as a whole, a relationship that convinces us Dany loves her people. But this doesn’t really align with the way Dany has treated all those other Unsullied.

All of this means that when we see Dany freaking out while Missandei dies, it rings more than a little hollow; Dany’s best friend may be a person of color, but that doesn’t make her less problematic as a white savior. (x)

I would argue that the books (and heck, the show as well!!!) tell a very different story.

A Dance with Dragons

ADWD Daenerys X

Jhiqui and Irri would be waiting atop her pyramid back in Meereen, she told herself. Her sweet scribe Missandei as well, and all her little pages. They would bring her food, and she could bathe in the pool beneath the persimmon tree. It would be good to feel clean again. Dany did not need a glass to know that she was filthy.

~

As the world darkened, Dany settled in and closed her eyes, but sleep refused to come. The night was cold, the ground hard, her belly empty. She found herself thinking of Meereen, of Daario, her love, and Hizdahr, her husband, of Irri and Jhiqui and sweet Missandei, Ser Barristan and Reznak and Skahaz Shavepate. Do they fear me dead? I flew off on a dragon’s back. Will they think he ate me?

ADWD Daenerys IX

“Even if the pits must open, must Your Grace go yourself?” asked Missandei as she was washing the queen’s hair.

“Half of Meereen will be there to see me, gentle heart.”

“Your Grace,” said Missandei, “this one begs leave to say that half of Meereen will be there to watch men bleed and die.”

She is not wrong, the queen knew, but it makes no matter.

~

As Jhiqui brushed Dany’s hair and Irri painted the queen’s nails, they chattered happily about the day’s matches. Missandei reemerged. “Your Grace. The king bids you join him when you are dressed. And Prince Quentyn has come with his Dornish Men. They beg a word, if that should please you.”

Little about this day shall please me. “Some other day.”

ADWD Daenerys VIII

“My queen?” said a soft voice in the darkness.

Dany flinched. “Who is there?”

“Only Missandei.” The Naathi scribe moved closer to the bed. “This one heard you crying.”

“Crying? I was not crying. Why would I cry? I have my peace, I have my king, I have everything a queen might wish for. You had a bad dream, that was all.”

“As you say, Your Grace.” She bowed and made to go.

“Stay,” said Dany. “I do not wish to be alone.”

“His Grace is with you,” Missandei pointed out.

“His Grace is dreaming, but I cannot sleep. On the morrow I must bathe in blood. The price of peace.” She smiled wanly and patted the bed. “Come. Sit. Talk with me.”

“If it please you.” Missandei sat down beside her. “What shall we talk of?”

“Home,” said Dany. “Naath. Butterflies and brothers. Tell me of the things that make you happy, the things that make you giggle, all your sweetest memories. Remind me that there is still good in the world.”

Missandei did her best. She was still talking when Dany finally fell to sleep, to dream queer, half-formed dreams of smoke and fire.

The morning came too soon.

ADWD Daenerys VII

Dany sat amongst the rumpled bedclothes with her arms about her knees, so forlorn that she did not hear when Missandei came creeping in with bread and milk and figs. “Your Grace? Are you unwell? In the black of night this one heard you scream.”

Dany took a fig. It was black and plump, still moist with dew. Will Hizdahr ever make me scream? “It was the wind that you heard screaming.” She took a bite, but the fruit had lost its savor now that Daario was gone.

~

When he was gone, Missandei brought the queen a simple meal of goat cheese and olives, with raisins for a sweet. “Your Grace needs more than wine to break her fast. You are such a tiny thing, and you will surely need your strength today.”

That made Daenerys laugh, coming from a girl so small. She relied so much on the little scribe that she oft forgot that Missandei had only turned eleven. They shared the food together on her terrace. As Dany nibbled on an olive, the Naathi girl gazed at her with eyes like molten gold and said, “It is not too late to tell them that you have decided not to wed.”

It is, though, the queen thought, sadly. “Hizdahr’s blood is ancient and noble. Our joining will join my freedmen to his people. When we become as one, so will our city.”

“Your Grace does not love the noble Hizdahr. This one thinks you would sooner have another for your husband.”

I must not think of Daario today. “A queen loves where she must, not where she will.” Her appetite had left her. “Take this food away,” she told Missandei. “It is time I bathed.”

~

Missandei reemerged from inside the pyramid. “Reznak and Skahaz beg the honor of escorting Your Grace to the Temple of the Graces. Reznak has ordered your palanquin made ready.”

Meereenese seldom rode within their city walls. They preferred palanquins, litters, and sedan chairs, borne upon the shoulders of their slaves. “Horses befoul the streets,” one man of Zakh had told her, “slaves do not.” Dany had freed the slaves, yet palanquins, litters, and sedan chairs still choked the streets as before, and none of them floated magically through the air.

“The day is too hot to be shut up in a palanquin,” said Dany. “Have my silver saddled. I would not go to my lord husband upon the backs of bearers.”

“Your Grace,” said Missandei, “this one is so sorry, but you cannot ride in a tokar.”

The little scribe was right, as she so often was. The tokar was not a garment meant for horseback. Dany made a face. “As you say. Not the palanquin, though. I would suffocate behind those drapes. Have them ready a sedan chair.” If she must wear her floppy ears, let all the rabbits see her.

ADWD Daenerys VI

When Daenerys returned to her pyramid, sore of limb and sick of heart, she found Missandei reading some old scroll whilst Irri and Jhiqui argued about Rakharo.

~

A cool wind was blowing on her terrace. Dany sighed with pleasure as she slipped into the waters of her pool. At her command, Missandei stripped off her clothes and climbed in after her. “This one heard the Astapori scratching at the walls last night,” the little scribe said as she was washing Dany’s back.

Irri and Jhiqui exchanged a look. “No one was scratching,” said Jhiqui. “Scratching … how could they scratch?”

“With their hands,” said Missandei. “The bricks are old and crumbling. They are trying to claw their way into the city.”

“This would take them many years,” said Irri. “The walls are very thick. This is known.”

“It is known,” agreed Jhiqui.

“I dream of them as well.” Dany took Missandei’s hand. “The camp is a good half-mile from the city, my sweetling. No one was scratching at the walls.”

“Your Grace knows best,” said Missandei. “Shall I wash your hair? It is almost time. Reznak mo Reznak and the Green Grace are coming to discuss—”

“—the wedding preparations.” Dany sat up with a splash. “I had almost forgotten.” Perhaps I wanted to forget.

~

Daario’s announcement had sparked an uproar. Reznak was wailing, the Shavepate was muttering darkly, her bloodriders were swearing vengeance. Strong Belwas thumped his scarred belly with his fist and swore to eat Brown Ben’s heart with plums and onions. “Please,” Dany said, but only Missandei seemed to hear. The queen got to her feet. “Be quiet! I have heard enough.”

ADWD Daenerys V

She would have kissed her good knight on the cheek, but just then Missandei appeared beneath the arched doorway. “Missandei?”

“Your Grace. Skahaz awaits your pleasure.”

“Send him up.”

ADWD Daenerys IV

The queen welcomed them warmly, then summoned Missandei to see that the girls were fed and entertained whilst she shared a private supper with the Green Grace.

~

… but Daenerys Targaryen had other children, tens of thousands who had hailed her as their mother when she broke their chains. She thought of Stalwart Shield, of Missandei’s brother, of the woman Rylona Rhee, who had played the harp so beautifully. No marriage would ever bring them back to life, but if a husband could help end the slaughter, then she owed it to her dead to marry.

~

How could I ever hope to sleep, knowing that my captain so close? “Send him up at once. And … I will have no more need of you this evening. I shall be safe with Daario. Oh, and send Irri and Jhiqui, if you would be so good. And Missandei.” I need to change, to make myself beautiful.

She said as much to her handmaids when they came. “What does Your Grace wish to wear?” asked Missandei.

Starlight and seafoam, Dany thought, a wisp of silk that leaves my left breast bare for Daario’s delight. Oh, and flowers for my hair.

 ADWD Daenerys III

“Wherever the Mother of Dragons goes, the Mother’s Men will go as well,” announced Marselen, Missandei’s remaining brother.

ADWD Daenerys II

She could hear the soft sounds of sobs. “Who is that weeping?”

“Your slave Missandei.” Jhiqui had a taper in her hand.

“My servant. I have no slaves.” Dany did not understand. “Why does she weep?”

“For him who was her brother,” Irri told her. The rest she had from Skahaz, Reznak, and Grey Worm, when they were ushered into her presence. Dany knew their tidings were bad before a word was spoken. One glance at the Shavepate’s ugly face sufficed to tell her that.

~

“Your servants were set upon as they walked the bricks of Meereen to keep Your Grace’s peace. All were well armed, with spears and shields and short swords. Two by two they walked, and two by two they died. Your servants Black Fist and Cetherys were slain by crossbow bolts in Mazdhan’s Maze. Your servants Mossador and Duran were crushed by falling stones beneath the river wall. Your servants Eladon Goldenhair and Loyal Spear were poisoned at a wineshop where they were accustomed to stop each night upon their rounds.”

Mossador. Dany made a fist. Missandei and her brothers had been taken from their home on Naath by raiders from the Basilisk Isles and sold into slavery in Astapor. Young as she was, Missandei had shown such a gift for tongues that the Good Masters had made a scribe of her. Mossador and Marselen had not been so fortunate. They had been gelded and made into Unsullied.

~

When she returned to her rooms atop the pyramid, she found Missandei crying softly on her pallet, trying as best she could to muffle the sound of her sobs. “Come sleep with me,” she told the little scribe. “Dawn will not come for hours yet.”

“Your Grace is kind to this one.” Missandei slipped under the sheets. “He was a good brother.”

Dany wrapped her arms about the girl. “Tell me of him.”

“He taught me how to climb a tree when we were little. He could catch fish with his hands. Once I found him sleeping in our garden with a hundred butterflies crawling over him. He looked so beautiful that morning, this one … I mean, I loved him.”

“As he loved you.” Dany stroked the girl’s hair. “Say the word, my sweet, and I will send you from this awful place. I will find a ship somehow and send you home. To Naath.”

“I would sooner stay with you. On Naath I’d be afraid. What if the slavers came again? I feel safe when I’m with you.”

Safe. The word made Dany’s eyes fill up with tears. “I want to keep you safe.” Missandei was only a child. With her, she felt as if she could be a child too. “No one ever kept me safe when I was little. Well, Ser Willem did, but then he died, and Viserys … I want to protect you but … it is so hard. To be strong. I don’t always know what I should do. I must know, though. I am all they have. I am the queen … the … the …”

“… mother,” whispered Missandei.

“Mother to dragons.” Dany shivered.

“No. Mother to us all.” Missandei hugged her tighter. “Your Grace should sleep. Dawn will be here soon, and court.”

“We’ll both sleep, and dream of sweeter days. Close your eyes.” When she did, Dany kissed her eyelids and made her giggle.

~

A soft rustle made her open them again. She sat up with a soft splash. “Missandei?” she called. “Irri? Jhiqui?”

~

“Your Grace?” Missandei stood in the door of the queen’s bedchamber, a lantern in her hand. “Who are you talking to?”

Dany glanced back toward the persimmon tree. There was no woman there. No hooded robe, no lacquer mask, no Quaithe.

A shadow. A memory. No one. She was the blood of the dragon, but Ser Barristan had warned her that in that blood there was a taint. Could I be going mad? They had called her father mad, once. “I was praying,” she told the Naathi girl. “It will be light soon. I had best eat something, before court.”

~

Missandei returned with a melon and a bowl of hard-cooked eggs, but Dany found she had no appetite.

~

It was blood the Meereenese yearned to see, not skill. Elsewise the fighting slaves would have worn armor. Only the little scribe Missandei seemed to share the queen’s misgivings.

ADWD Daenerys I

“Your Grace,” said Ser Barristan Selmy, the lord commander of her Queensguard, “there is no need for you to see this.”

“He died for me.” Dany clutched her lion pelt to her chest. Underneath, a sheer white linen tunic covered her to midthigh. She had been dreaming of a house with a red door when Missandei woke her. There had been no time to dress.

~

The Undying of Qarth had told her she would be thrice betrayed. Mirri Maz Duur had been the first, Ser Jorah the second. Would Reznak be the third? The Shavepate? Daario? Or will it be someone I would never suspect, Ser Barristan or Grey Worm or Missandei?

~

Missandei announced her. The little scribe had a sweet, strong voice. “All kneel for Daenerys Stormborn, the Unburnt, Queen of Meereen, Queen of the Andals and the Rhoynar and the First Men, Khaleesi of Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Shackles, and Mother of Dragons.”

A Storm of Swords

ASOS Daenerys VI

“I must remember to do something about the flies,” Dany said. “Are there many flies on Naath, Missandei?”

“On Naath there are butterflies,” the scribe responded in the Common Tongue. “More wine?”

“No. I must hold court soon.” Dany had grown very fond of Missandei. The little scribe with the big golden eyes was wise beyond her years. She is brave as well. She had to be, to survive the life she’s lived. One day she hoped to see this fabled isle of Naath. Missandei said the Peaceful People made music instead of war. They did not kill, not even animals; they ate only fruit and never flesh. The butterfly spirits sacred to their Lord of Harmony protected their isle against those who would do them harm. Many conquerors had sailed on Naath to blood their swords, only to sicken and die. The butterflies do not help them when the slave ships come raiding, though. “I am going to take you home one day, Missandei,” Dany promised. If I had made the same promise to Jorah, would he still have sold me? “I swear it.”

“This one is content to stay with you, Your Grace. Naath will be there, always. You are good to this—to me.”

“And you to me.” Dany took the girl by the hand. “Come help me dress.”

~

Daario and Ben Plumm, Grey Worm, Irri, Jhiqui, Missandei ... as she looked at them Dany found herself wondering which of them would betray her next.

~

“Your Grace,” said Missandei, “Ghiscari inter their honored dead in crypts below their manses. If you would boil the bones clean and return them to their kin, it would be a kindness.”

The widows will curse me all the same. “Let it be done.”

~

“Noble Ghael,” said Missandei, in the dialect of Astapor, “is this the same Cleon once owned by Grazdan mo Ullhor?”

Her voice was guileless, yet the question plainly made the envoy anxious. “The same,” he admitted. “A great man.”

Missandei leaned close to Dany. “He was a butcher in Grazdan’s kitchen,” the girl whispered in her ear. “It was said he could slaughter a pig faster than any man in Astapor.”

I have given Astapor a butcher king. Dany felt ill, but she knew she must not let the envoy see it.

~

“...To prove his faith, Great Cleon offers to seal your alliance with a marriage.”

“A marriage? To me?”

Ghael smiled. His teeth were brown and rotten. “Great Cleon will give you many strong sons.”

Dany found herself bereft of words, but little Missandei came to her rescue. “Did his first wife give him sons?”

~

“Any man who wishes to sell himself into slavery may do so. Or woman.” She raised a hand. “But they may not sell their children, nor a man his wife.”

“In Astapor the city took a tenth part of the price, each time a slave changed hands,” Missandei told her.

“We’ll do the same,” Dany decided. Wars were won with gold as much as swords.

~

“Your Grace?” Missandei stood at her elbow wrapped in a bedrobe, wooden sandals on her feet. “I woke, and saw that you were gone. Did you sleep well? What are you looking at?”

“My city,” said Dany. “I was looking for a house with a red door, but by night all the doors are black.”

“A red door?” Missandei was puzzled. “What house is this?”

“No house. It does not matter.” Dany took the younger girl by the hand. “Never lie to me, Missandei. Never betray me.”

“I never would,” Missandei promised. “Look, dawn comes.”

[...] Dany held Missandei’s hand as they watched the sun come up.

~

“There is nothing to stay for,” said Brown Ben Plumm.

“Your Grace, the slavers brought their doom on themselves,” said Daario Naharis.

“You have brought freedom as well,” Missandei pointed out.

“Freedom to starve?” asked Dany sharply. “Freedom to die? Am I a dragon, or a harpy?” Am I mad? Do I have the taint?

ASOS Daenerys V

“Strong Belwas is hurt.” His stomach was red with the blood sheeting down from the meaty gash beneath his breasts.

“It is nothing. I let each man cut me once, before I kill him.” He slapped his bloody belly. “Count the cuts and you will know how many Strong Belwas has slain.”

But Dany had lost Khal Drogo to a similar wound, and she was not willing to let it go untreated. She sent Missandei to find a certain Yunkish freedman renowned for his skill in the healing arts.

~

“Missandei,” she called, “have my silver saddled. Your own mount as well.”

The little scribe bowed. “As Your Grace commands. Shall I summon your bloodriders to guard you?”

“We’ll take Arstan. I do not mean to leave the camps.”

~

Dany had stopped to speak to a pregnant woman who wanted the Mother of Dragons to name her baby when someone reached up and grabbed her left wrist. Turning, she glimpsed a tall ragged man with a shaved head and a sunburnt face. “Not so hard,” she started to say, but before she could finish he’d yanked her bodily from the saddle. The ground came up and knocked the breath from her, as her silver whinnied and backed away. Stunned, Dany rolled to her side and pushed herself onto one elbow ...

... and then she saw the sword.

“There’s the treacherous sow,” he said. “I knew you’d come to get your feet kissed one day.” His head was bald as a melon, his nose red and peeling, but she knew that voice and those pale green eyes. “I’m going to start by cutting off your teats.” Dany was dimly aware of Missandei shouting for help.

~

Missandei was pulling Dany to her feet when she heard a crack.

ASOS Daenerys IV

Irri and Jhiqui had covered the floor with carpets while Missandei lit a stick of incense to sweeten the dusty air.

~

“Missandei, what language will these Yunkai’i speak, Valyrian?”

“Yes, Your Grace,” the child said. “A different dialect than Astapor’s, yet close enough to understand. The slavers name themselves the Wise Masters.”

“Wise?” Dany sat crosslegged on a cushion, and Viserion spread his white-and-gold wings and flapped to her side. “We shall see how wise they are,” she said as she scratched the dragon’s scaly head behind the horns.

~

The hours crept by on turtle feet. Even after Jhiqui rubbed the knots from her shoulders, Dany was too restless for sleep. Missandei offered to sing her a lullaby of the Peaceful People, but Dany shook her head.

~

On the morning of the third day, the city gates swung open and a line of slaves began to emerge. Dany mounted her silver to greet them. As they passed, little Missandei told them that they owed their freedom to Daenerys Stormborn, the Unburnt, Queen of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros and Mother of Dragons.

“Mhysa!” a brown-skinned man shouted out at her. He had a child on his shoulder, a little girl, and she screamed the same word in her thin voice. “Mhysa! Mhysa!”

Dany looked at Missandei. “What are they shouting?”

“It is Ghiscari, the old pure tongue. It means ‘Mother.’”

Dany felt a lightness in her chest.

ASOS Daenerys III

“All?” The slave girl sounded wary. “Your Grace, did this one’s worthless ears mishear you?”

[...] “Your ears heard true,” said Dany. “I want to buy them all. Tell the Good Masters, if you will.”

~

“The Unsullied will learn your savage tongue quick enough,” added Kraznys mo Nakloz, when all the arrangements had been made, “but until such time you will need a slave to speak to them. Take this one as our gift to you, a token of a bargain well struck.”

“I shall,” said Dany.

The slave girl rendered his words to her, and hers to him. If she had feelings about being given for a token, she took care not to let them show.

~

Dany turned away from him, to the slave girl standing meekly beside her litter. “Do you have a name, or must you draw a new one every day from some barrel?”

“That is only for Unsullied,” the girl said. Then she realized the question had been asked in High Valyrian. Her eyes went wide. “Oh.”

“Your name is Oh?”


“No. Your Grace, forgive this one her outburst. Your slave’s name is Missandei, but ...”

“Missandei is no longer a slave. I free you, from this instant. Come ride with me in the litter, I wish to talk.” Rakharo helped them in, and Dany drew the curtains shut against the dust and heat. “If you stay with me you will serve as one of my handmaids,” she said as they set off. “I shall keep you by my side to speak for me as you spoke for Kraznys. But you may leave my service whenever you choose, if you have father or mother you would sooner return to.”

“This one will stay,” the girl said. “This one ... I ... there is no place for me to go. This ... I will serve you, gladly.”

“I can give you freedom, but not safety,” Dany warned. “I have a world to cross and wars to fight. You may go hungry. You may grow sick. You may be killed.”

“Valar morghulis,” said Missandei, in High Valyrian.


“All men must die,” Dany agreed, “but not for a long while, we may pray.” She leaned back on the pillows and took the girl’s hand. “Are these Unsullied truly fearless?”

“Yes, Your Grace.”

“You serve me now. Is it true they feel no pain?”

“The wine of courage kills such feelings. By the time they slay their sucklings, they have been drinking it for years.”

“And they are obedient?”

“Obedience is all they know. If you told them not to breathe, they would find that easier than not to obey.”

Dany nodded. “And when I am done with them?”

“Your Grace?”

“When I have won my war and claimed the throne that was my father’s, my knights will sheathe their swords and return to their keeps, to their wives and children and
mothers ... to their lives. But these eunuchs have no lives. What am I to do with eight thousand eunuchs when there are no more battles to be fought?”

“The Unsullied make fine guards and excellent watchmen, Your Grace,” said Missandei. “And it is never hard to find a buyer for such fine well-blooded troops.”

“Men are not bought and sold in Westeros, they tell me.”

“With all respect, Your Grace, Unsullied are not men.”

“If I did resell them, how would I know they could not be used against me?” Dany asked pointedly. “Would they do that? Fight against me, even do me harm?”

“If their master commanded. They do not question, Your Grace. All the questions have been culled from them. They obey.” She looked troubled. “When you are ... when you are done with them ... your Grace might command them to fall upon their swords.”

“And even that, they would do?”


“Yes.” Missandei’s voice had grown soft. “Your Grace.”

Dany squeezed her hand. “You would sooner I did not ask it of them, though. Why is that? Why do you care?”

“This one does not ... I ... Your Grace ... ”


“Tell me.”


The girl lowered her eyes. “Three of them were my brothers once, Your Grace.”

Then I hope your brothers are as brave and clever as you.

ASOS Daenerys II

“The Good Master Kraznys asks, are they not magnificent?” The girl spoke the Common Tongue well, for one who had never been to Westeros. No older than ten, she had the round flat face, dusky skin, and golden eyes of Naath. The Peaceful People, her folk were called. All agreed that they made the best slaves.

[astorytellerforthatgirl]

Maine as a Bearer of Light

Maine Mendoza becomes a household name in both the world of social and mainstream media for her numerous feat—-viral dubsmash videos, various local and international brand ads, 5th most tweeted celebrity worldwide in Twitter last 2017, #1 best selling author for NBS non-fiction section for some months, Favorite Pinoy Personality at Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards back in 2016, and Mac Cosmetics’ beauty influencers to name few of these feat spanning from 2015 to early 2018. Needless to say, she successfully traversed print, broadcast, mainstream, digital, and social media in that short time frame for a celebrity. 

Yes, self-confessed fans showed their love and care while non-supporters express their admiration and respect for Maine, for That Girl due to these achievements. Aside from her magnificent milestones too in her career, a lot of people vouch for her self-discipline and for her pure heart.

As a random storyteller and a silent observer myself, I read articles, heard interviews and stories about people from the entertainment industry whether they are artists, directors, production staff, executives, etc of how she values her work ethics so much. She appears for a scheduled commitment way ahead of the call time. In addition, she’s very fun-to-be-with as they claimed. She’s one of the most genuine ones in the industry for her unassuming character. Also, fans who have luckily encountered Maine shared how she is so humble, warm, and outgoing personally. If only she can talk to everyone who wants to see her, I feel she will do so. This is how a pure heart Maine is. 

But more than the Maine Mendoza everyone knows, what I want to emphasize here is how she become a bearer of light for anyone who needs it. Before I proceed further with this blog entry, allow me to explain first what I meant by a bearer of light. Light here, in its metaphorical context, means inspiration, motivation, encouragement, uplifting, enthusiasm, passion, love, care, and warmth. To be a bearer, one should have a pure heart that will make him or her credible to share and radiate this light. The bearer should have the ethos or authentic character, the pathos or the emotional appeal and connection, and the logos or rational and intellectual approach. In short, the bearer of light should have a discerning mind and a compassionate heart to be a true inspiration for anyone.

How does Maine Mendoza become a bearer of light?

First, she taught us how to conquer our fears and doubts. In the audition clip of Maine for Eat Bulaga, she was asked if she sings or dances into which she answered both with a No. That answer along with her timid body language reflects someone with doubts and limitations still hindering her. Fast forward to present time, how many times did we already witnessed Maine singing some songs and even dancing energetically to them? She is not as talented as the other mainstream artists out there but she conquered her earlier doubts and fears that she doesn’t sing or dance. She shared her skills too in playing the drums even if she feels she needs more practice. There’s no harm in trying for we have nothing to lose but everything to gain, that’s how Maine did it.

Second, she taught us to be true to ourselves and speak out the truth at the right time. Out of the many reasons why she trended in Twitter without an organized hashtag, the open letter she released last Nov. 26 is one of the most talked about. Polarizing reactions spurred out since then. It is expected because of the different focal lens each tried to use to comprehend that letter. It feels like I’m seeing an actual application of a Reader-Response literary theory, wherein the meaning of the text lies in how the readers perceived it subjectively due to their schema, emotions, and other related factors. Maine know the possible aftermath of what she did…she is willing to lose it all at that moment just to send her message of truth across everyone. That “kahit sampu na lang matira” is a testament to her assumption she’ll be hated by all for speaking the truth. Yes, there are several interpretations after but from my personal observation, the open letter did help Maine to release every unsaid words in her heart. She has finally explained the truth without using euphemisms or sugarcoating. In fact I am impressed she still has a calm tone in the open letter and not letting her emotions to take full control of her. It takes a lot of guts to do that mind you. “Speak the truth even if your voice is shaky”, she reminded us of that.

Third, she taught us to stand up for our beliefs even if we are the lone messenger in a given circumstance or situation. Remember the depression issue with another host Joey de Leon? In that “Juan for All, All for Juan” segment, a brief exchange of conflicting opinions persisted. De Leon has a different take on depression that it isn’t real while Maine insisted in a respectful tone that it isn’t a joke and those who are suffering from it needs support. This is another moment Maine trended in Twitter without an organized hashtag. Netizens rallied behind her for standing up for her beliefs even if she is the lone messenger in that situation. She did not flinch or back down. She knew her silence may mean an indirect agreement with De Leon hence she became firmer in her stand. Some netizens even claimed they are not fans or they barely know Maine but they commend her bravery for speaking up. I’m surprised even my favorite political satirist applauded Maine in his Twitter account for that matter because he rarely tweets about mainstream celebrities. That’s the game changer for you folks. Fight for your belief even if you will fight alone, like how Maine speaks up.

Fourth, she taught us fight back again despite of the challenges. What happened after the open letter? Swarms of clashing opinions flooded from different camps. Others did not like what Maine did while there are also those who applauded her. Speculations came from nowhere said she might consider quitting. Her one month hiatus was the longest time to endure for her fans. No one knows what will be her next plan of actions. December passed and while she got back on her social media accounts, it is still a mystery back then how will Maine come back after this most challenging part of her career to date. The Maine who returned on Eat Bulaga is one with a more positive, more cheerful, and more relaxed aura. Her sunshine smile and expressive eyes dazzled that day. She was finally free of the inner turmoil in her heart brought by the challenges. She did not let anything stopped her from returning and it feels like seeing a Maine Mendoza with a clean and brand new slate—a perfect way to greet the new year for sure. We can’t control how people will react or how big is the magnitude of the challenges but we can learn how to go through it all with a resilient spirit. Thank you for this reminder Maine.

Fifth, she taught us how to be grateful for everything. From the most simple things, actions, gestures, efforts to the outpour of blessings, Maine showed her gratitude for it all. From a perspective of a fan, her biggest gestures of recognizing the support she got is by the allowing us to see her for who she is through various forms like in her social media accounts, her blog, and her autobiography. For a mainstream celebrity like her who has tons of commitment, it’s heartwarming to see she exerts efforts to reach to the fans in her own special way. Add to these are the humbling personal interaction with Maine by some lucky fans. Her heart is overwhelmed indeed with gratitude that at times, she’s trying to contain herself and holding back her tears—pure bliss indeed. We have to be thankful for everything we have in our life now as how Maine has shown as well.

Sixth, she taught us to smile and laugh amidst all problems. Her dubsmash videos, witty catchphrases, funny replies in ask.FM, and wacky pictures are some of her subtle reminders to always find the sunshine despite the cloudy or stormy days in our life. Can you recall that clip from “I Can See Your Voice” she shared? She mentioned there “para sa mga nalulungkot…” Maine just want to remind us always to smile, laugh, and find happiness in any possible way. We don’t need to look far for it is our choice to let ourselves be infected with that contagious happy virus. Life is greater with happiness in our hearts. *

Seventh, she taught us to empathize with others. Despite being a mainstream celebrity and a daughter of a Class B family, Maine wholeheartedly accept the taong grasa social experiment before in Eat Bulaga. She was incognito as a rugged beggar asking for help. She didn’t mind going through the streets being avoided by everyone. It was an Eye-opener for her and made her more empathic for the less fortunate. Likewise, in some of her retweets for Jan 2018, she noticed those who are asking for assistance for their medical concerns. There are fans who responded too after she retweeted them. That ripple of empathy and compassion from her was passed on to her fans like how a light gets through a dark room. Again, this is another way that Maine is a bearer of light. 

Eighth, she taught us to give it all we got. One of her most unforgettable performances on “Eat Bulaga” was that Dabarkads challenge wherein she and Ryan Agoncillo became a tandem. I didn’t know the song “Alarma” is now a stimulus for me to reminisce those heart-stopping performances. (KASI NAMAN DI PA AKO NAGKAROON NG IDOL NOON NA BINABALIBAG, HINAHAGIS,INIITSA!!!???? SI MAINE LANG!!! HAHAHA!!!) How far can she really go? Not even the sky is the limit for Maine. She wants to always give better than the best expectations from her. If she did feel fear or hesitation in those jaw-dropping productions, I wouldn’t know for she stamped them all with her enthusiasm and passion. Go for the gold. All or nothing. Go home or go big. Maine wants to give her all more than just her best because her best is just a part of her all. Let’s take that cue from her. 

Ninth, she taught us to freely express our ideas and never suppress it. Even before the open letter, Maine is very expressive in her blog. For me, it feels her blog is like a diary in reverse. She writes down her experiences, stories, and just about anything that crosses her mind. The difference with a diary though is these blog entries are not in secret and she let us read them too. This random storyteller became a fangirl of Maine because of her blogger side. She has a knack for writing but she needs to develop more techniques to add depth in her style. Nevertheless, even if Maine didn’t take up creative writing as her major in college, she has a distinct tone in her writing. (Para sa akin yun ang tono na kapag binasa mo ang sinulat ni Maine, parang maririnig mo mismo ang boses niya, ramdam mo ang puso niya sa lahat ng blog entries niya) Maine can be a good writer for creative non-fiction as her strongest genre. I can see her the potential of writing not simply “I went to the beach” but rather describing it like “The salty smell of the cerulean sea soothes me as the gentle breeze and morning sun touches my skin. My feet are magnetized to the fine white sands. I love coming back to this faraway home.“ I’m excited to see Maine trying more in her writing skills especially for creative non-fiction, poetry, or flash fiction. She’ll do well for sure. Just like her, let us find ways how to express ourselves in the most comfortable medium for us.

Tenth, she taught us to be self-independent. She got her internship in New York for 6 months, away from her family and friends in the Philippines. She made that place like her own home and stood on her own feet. When she entered the entertainment industry too, her various commitments demand more places to travel for her. Finding the right balance between responsibility and making the most out of each moment, Maine savors these experiences as room for growth and development. Being self-independent strengthens us more while we enjoy the journey we chose.

Eleventh, she taught us the value of financial literacy. Maine did not let the glamour and luxury of the entertainment industry blind her from financial literacy. A friend of mine who has an idea of approximate ranges of franchises of popular food chains said that McDonald’s needs a huge capital investment. The McDonald’s in Sta.Maria, Bulacan is owned solely by Maine as evidenced from the OR(official receipt) with “NicoMaineDei Corp.” in it. She does not want to see her hard earned money go to vain hence she’s investing it. It’s nice too to learn more about financial literacy for us because at the time where inflation accelerates in our country, saving only is not enough anymore. We also need to invest. Maine is a role model too for this matter.

Twelfth, she taught us to value our education. As sad as I can say but the truth is we live in the times that access to education is a privilege and not a right anymore. Not everyone who wants to go to school can afford to do so, thus, for those who have the opportunity to finish their studies, do well and please don’t waste the chances given. Maine valued her education and she even attained honorary excellence in a specific term back in Benilde. It’s a reminder for her diligence in studying. I won’t be surprised if Maine gets back to studying by enrolling in short courses like filmmaking, communication arts, foreign languages, etc. or even in master’s program. For the youth especially teenagers looking up to Maine, have this as an inspiration as you finish your studies.

Thirteenth, she taught us the significance of family, friends, and loved ones. One of my favorite random moments Maine shared about her family is when her sister passed the CPA board exam. She excitedly shared to Twitter how grateful and celebratory was the atmosphere when they found out about the result. To be happy for a family member’s success means you want the best for them. I remembered too her first TV interview in Kapuso Mo, Jessica Soho. It was just few days after she became Yaya Dub. Her parents proudly showed their support in the interview for as long as their daughter is happy, free, and responsibly growing in the entertainment industry. Also, Maine never forgets her friends as well. She finds time to catch up with them despite of her busy schedule. There’s no place like home when we are with our loved ones so we must take every opportunity to express our care for them like the actions of Maine.  

Fourteenth, she taught us to not get even but to have love and courage. She knows when to keep mum and when to speak up. The most painful words in the form of fabricated maligning stories, crab mentality, sensationalized intriguing hearsays, below-the-belt allegations coming from loathe, envy, rage, and hatred can easily make anyone, even a celebrity, to think of getting even. Maine remained mum after the open letter for she knew she already said everything she wants to convey there, nothing more and nothing less. Her mark of love and courage emerge in the one-month hiatus she took and even more in the time now that she came back to work. This is one of my favorite defining moments of Maine—she is like a raw metal that the Blacksmith forged under fire into the sharpest sword. God sent her that forging process to test her heart, as painful as it gets but it helped Maine seek more in herself—that she has a pure heart and only love and courage should be the anchor. The bearer of light like Maine radiated brightly in this deep darkness. Like her, we should not let any negativity took control of our hearts and minds, even if we are provoked to do so.  

Fifteenth, she taught us how to believe in ourselves and to have faith in God. I read an excerpt of her book from cosmo.ph. (https://www.cosmo.ph/entertainment/maine-mendoza-yup-i-am-that-girl-book-a1205-20171128) 

 “Things may go from bad to worse and you might feel like it’s never going to change, but believe me when I say it will get better. Everything will be all right, I promise you. We may have our own different battles, but remember there is only one God. He is always looking down on us wherever we go and whatever obstacle we face. You may currently be in a lot of pain, but you never know what God has in store for your future.”

Maine is persuading her readers to believe in themselves and trust God for their battles. No matter how dark, painful, troublesome, and endless the challenges are, there will always be a better tomorrow. All we need is a stronger faith and to always believe in ourselves. 

Sixteenth, she taught us to “Fly high with our kite but keep our feet back on the ground”. Maine achieved all these feat in a short time and there are no signs stopping her from soaring further. Since her early dubsmash videos to the present, her humility remains. She isn’t letting anything go into her head. There is always a continuous process of learning and improving for her. She doesn’t let arrogance, narcissism, and ego become her center. In all the opportunities she received, she never forget to thank the people who are with her in this journey. That humility is another distinct mark of a pure heart and a bearer of light.

Lastly, she taught us to live our life to the fullest. She has her bucket list to fulfill. The “bucket list” as explained to me before by a friend who studies language transformations said that this is a list you want to fulfill before your lifetime ends. It came from the idiomatic expression “kick the bucket” which means to pass away, thus, having a bucket list is like a checklist with your whole lifetime as the time frame. Maine is truly enjoying her life to the fullest as she’s living her dream of becoming a celebrity and checked out some of those in her bucketlist. We must bear in mind that like Maine, our life is more than just work or studies. We have to find the right balance and seize the wonderful moments too.

These 17 are just some marks as to how she becomes a bearer of light coming from a random storyteller like me who silently fangirled for her alone since 2016 up to the release of the open letter. I decided to proudly reveal I am a fan of Maine to void her first assumption that “sampu na lang” will be her remaining fans after she dished out the open letter. I am pretty much certain this list of 17 will be longer for those who are die-hard supporters for they can share more what I just did.

If ever this blog entry reaches you Maine, I in behalf of all your fans, would love to express our gratitude for embracing the role of a bearer of light. Please continue doing so. You have so much more to offer….You even made this storyteller to remember God’s word of self-control, understanding, compassion, and forgiveness by putting it into action. Through you, friendships were formed and initiatives of advocacies started. Because of you, the silent and scared voices starts to speak up for themselves. For all those moments you stayed true to yourself, you become a universal happy pill for everyone who loves you. With your posts and messages, those who are on the verge of giving up felt God is persistently reminding them they are loved and they must hold on and propel in life. 

 Yes Maine! You are indeed a true bearer of light. :)

This time allow us to recall how worthy you are to be loved in spite of your flaws and imperfections…how worthy you are to be appreciated for your genuine character…how worthy you are to be reminded of your significance for us. This time allow us to be grateful for your mere existence and presence in this lifetime we have. This time allow us to shout with all our might how many of us stayed despite of your earlier fears “kahit sampu na lang matira” whether fans from affiliated groups or fans like me acting like a lone messenger. This time allow us to answer your questions “Ano ba talagang meron sa akin? Ano ba ang ginagawa ko?"  Lahat-lahat ng binanggit ko dito Maine ginawa mo, may liwanag ka na nagpasaya sa amin. At kung minsan hindi mo alam kung paano pasasayahin ang sarili mo, hayaan mo, ipapaalala naming paulit-ulit kung gaano ka kahalaga sa amin. 

...This time, please allow us to give back to you the light you radiated towards us… :)  

And I wish one day, when fate smiles upon this random storyteller and the universe conspires with me, I can smile personally at you, look into your expressive eyes, and say with a cracked voice but a convincing tone: 

 “Maraming salamat sa lahat Maine, ibabalik ko na yun liwanag na binigay mo sa akin.”

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[duhragonball]

[FIC] Luffa: The Legendary Super Saiyan (58/?)

Disclaimer: This story features characters and concepts based on Dragon Ball, which is a trademark of Bird Studio/Shueisha and Toei Animation.   This is an unauthorized work, and no profit is being made on this work by me. This story is copyright of me. Download if you like, but please don’t archive it without my permission. Don’t be shy.

Continuity Note: About 1000 years before the events of Dragon Ball Z.

Previous chapters conveniently available here.

[26 July 236 Before Age.  Interstellar Space]

The wedding had gone smoothly, more or less.  Neither Luffa nor Zatte had any real interest in jewelry, so there were no rings.  The only physical symbol of their union was an unremarkable printout of a marriage certificate issued by the county clerk of Hobstot III’s capital city.  On the bridge of Luffa’s ship, Zatte sat at one of the crew stations with her feet on the console, and admired the paper copy with a contented grin.

The trip back to Luffasworld had been quiet.   Dr. Topsas had retired to his guest quarters several hours ago.  Keda had gone to bed as well, although she lived on the ship’s bridge, so she had curled up in the sleeping bag she had laid along one of the edges of the deck.  She had planned to stay up longer and talk, but the long day had taken its toll on the young Dorlun.

This left Zatte alone with one of the only other guests for the ceremony.  Wampaaan’riix was a Yetitan, a humanoid nine feet in height, covered in a thick coat of long white hair.  He was a friend of Luffa’s, although Zatte had never met him.  Now that he was here for a visit, she was determined to make up for lost time.

"I meant to ask about your garment?" he asked from his seat at the adjacent station.  The chair was comically small for a creature of his size, but he seemed well-accustomed to such accommodations.  "Is it traditional Dorlun attire?"

Zatte glanced down at the tailcoat she had laid on the floor.  She had loosened her tie and unbuttoned her waistcoat, having intended to change clothes hours ago, but somehow she had never gotten around to it.   None of it had been particularly comfortable, although she had to admit that it looked good.

"It’s traditional wedding attire on Hobstot," Zatte said.  "Same as that big white dress Luffa had on.  Fact is, Dorluns have a utilitarian attitude about clothing.  I thought Saiyans were the same, but the wedding planner we went to showed us some pictures and Luffa just *had* to do it too."

"Interesting," Wampaaan’riix said.  "I wouldn’t have thought her to be so sentimental."

"It always seems to come out when you least expect it," Zatte said.  She looked at her marriage certificate again, running her finger over the embossed seal left by the notary public.  "I guess I’m one to talk.  I’ve been staring at this thing all night like I married it instead of her."

"It’s a token of a prize well-earned," Wampaaan’riix said.  "We each cherish such triumphs in our own way.  It would be more troubling if you didn’t."

"I suppose you’re right," Zatte said.  "Listen, I want to thank you both for coming.  Luffa was really excited to have you here for this."

"The honor is mine," Wampaaan’riix said solemnly.  "And I had been promising to introduce my son to her for some time now.  This seemed to be a perfect occasion."

"Introduce?"  Zatte was confused.  She had been under the impression that they had met before.  "The way Luffa talked about your son, I thought they had known each other a long time."

"In a manner of speaking," Wampaaan’riix explained.  "Earlier, we were discussing the time she and I fought, and how she inadvertently read my mind."

"Right, that was how she first found out she could do that sort of thing," Zatte said.  "She’s gotten a lot better at it since then."

"Well, in that moment, she experienced a great deal of my memories firsthand," Wampaaan’riix said.  "This left a lasting impression upon her.  In a sense, she may feel very strongly about my family, as if they were her own..."

********

Below, in the yacht's dining hall, Luffa was surrounded by to-go boxes supplied by the company that had catered her wedding.  Using a large spoon from the galley, she scooped portions from each one onto her plate, gobbled them down with relish, then grabbed a fistful of carved fowl to follow it up.  She repeated this routine several times, occasionally pausing to drink from a large stein of ale.  Every so often, she would lift one of the large swaths of fabric from her wedding gown and wipe sauce from her face.  

Sitting beside her, Dewbaaac'nogg watched with admiration.  Luffa had set a place for him and piled several servings of leftovers on his plate, but he had barely touched it.  

"Are you sure you're not hungry, boy?" Luffa asked with her mouth full.  "The reception was seven hours ago."

"Like, negatory," he said, doing his best to make a good impression. "I'm still stuffed from before, you dig?"

Luffa shrugged and continued eating.  "Suit yourself, Dewbaaac'nogg.  I don't see how anybody as big as you gets by on so little nourishment."  She pointed her spoon at him and gave him a knowing look.  "Especially when you're as strong as you are.  Your old man told me how far along you've gotten in your training, but now that I can sense your ki for myself, I'm starting to think he was selling you short."

"Hey, no need to be so formal," he said.  "I gave you the scoop when we met on Hobstot, chickadee," he said.  "'Dewbaaac'nogg' is my A-plus appellation, but all my friends call me Dewbie!"

Her face had the same puzzled expression as the last three times he had told her this.  "I'm still getting used to that," she said.  "Same way I'm still getting used to the way you talk now, and all that yellow junk you put in your hair."

Dewbie reached into the fur on his shoulder and produced a small plastic comb, which he used on the tuft of hair on his scalp.  "Don't dis the 'do, sister.  This is the *style* on Yetitan.  And it's a hip trend on a heapin' helpin' of other happenin' planets."

"I know," Luffa said, trying to contain her embarrassment.  "I led a band of Extraligans into battle a few months back, and they all dyed their crest feathers bright yellow."

"Outta sight!" Dewbie exclaimed.  "I heard about that, but I thought somebody was pullin' ol' Dewbie's leg!"

Luffa's exploits had earned her a fan following over the past two years.  They seemed to come from all walks of life.  Soldiers, athletes, activists, and anyone else looking for a symbol would adopt pieces of her appearance or mannerisms.  The ones with hair on their heads would style it and color it to resemble her Super Saiyan form.  Those with tails would use fluorescent dye to resemble the way her own tail glowed in the transformed state.  People would adopt various catchphrases and inspirational quotes that were attributed to Luffa, even if she had never actually said them.  

For his part, Dewbaaac'nogg had gotten in on the ground floor.  His father had been absent for much of his life, preferring to seek his fortune on other worlds as a martial artist.  By chance, a random encounter with Luffa had forced Wampaaan'riix to rethink his priorities.  She defeated him with ease, but when she accidentally read his mind, she chose to spare his life.  His vulnerabilities laid bare, Wampaaan'riix chose to reconnect with his family, and Dewbie had been grateful to Luffa ever since.  When she became a celebrity, he became her number one fan on Yetitan.   Not all of his friends believed him when he claimed she was a friend of his father, but he couldn't really blame them for being skeptical.  

He had wanted to meet Luffa in person ever since, but he had to admit that she wasn't what he had expected.  She looked very much like any ordinary Saiyan.  Attending her wedding ceremony had been a great honor, but it also reminded Dewbie of his great aunt's third wedding last year.  At least this time Dewbie hadn't been required to perform the role of standard bearer, but it still felt more like time spent with an obscure relative than a great hero.  All Saiyans looked small to the giant Yetitans, but Luffa was even smaller still.  Her hands would tremble sometimes, to the point where she would tuck them under her armpits or between her knees.  

"Sorry," she said.  "Most of what I know about you is from when I absorbed your dad's memories, and that's all two years out of date.  A lot's changed since then, and I wasn't around to see it, so I'm still getting used to how you are now... Dewbie."

"No worries," Dewbie said, trying his best to stay casual.  "Pops filled me in on that particular factoid on the way to Hobstot.  Must be real gone to see me rocking this killer look and using all this hep lingo.  I guess I used to be kind of a square back then."

"Hell no," Luffa said, her voice suddenly becoming serious.   "The young man you used to be, well, he saved me once.  You might look and talk different, and you've got a silly nickname, but what's important hasn't changed.  Hah!  Your heart's the same.  That's what I need.  That's why I'm hoping you'll be able to help me again."

He wanted to ask her what she meant by that, but he was too stunned to speak.  She was asking for his help?  

Perhaps sensing his confusion, Luffa lowered her head and focused on her meal.  "Skip it," she said.  "This is a special occasion.  I don't want to bring down the mood.  We'll have plenty of time to go over it tomorrow, after your lesson."

There was something ominous about the way she used the word 'lesson'.  That was the whole reason Dewbie had been excited for this trip.  His father had kept up with Luffa through subspace correspondence, and she had asked to spar with Dewbie when his father thought he was ready.  Her exact words had been: "Maybe I can give the kid some pointers."  He had memorized that entire letter, but those eight words felt like they were etched onto his soul.  His hero, the Legendary Super Saiyan, the most famous warrior in the galaxy was going to give him a private lesson.   It was too good to be true.

And yet, now that he had finally heard her say the word aloud, Dewbie couldn't help but feel a sense of dread...

*******

[26 July 236 Before Age.  Luffasworld.]

Luffa used an entire planet for her training ground.   Since Planet Yetitan had a very cold climate, she had chosen a region near Luffasworld's southern pole for her session with Dewbie.  

While there had only been six people aboard the star-yacht during its trip to and from the wedding, by mid-morning it had filled with all sorts of people, most of them either looking for Luffa or the ship's bridge.  On his way to the galley for breakfast, he had passed a man in a wizard's cloak, two Plantians, and a crustacean-looking fellow in a military dress uniform.  Eventually, he became frustrated with the crowds and his own anxious anticipation, so he flew to the rendezvous point a full hour ahead of schedule.  He stretched and warmed up and meditated.  An hour and twenty minutes later, Luffa arrived to meet him.

She was very apologetic about being late, and this bothered Dewbie far more than he lateness itself.  It was almost as though she was his biggest fan, and not the other way around.  His generation of Yetitans knew better than to get hung up on timetables, and he wasn't the sort of killjoy who would get bent out of shape over a twenty minute delay.   Besides, she was a busy woman.  It was an honor that she had set this time aside for him at all.  He tried to tell her as much, but the message never seemed to get across.  Also, she was still in her wedding gown from the night before, which seemed odd to him.  

"Why not?" Luffa said with a shrug as she rotated her shoulder to limber up.  "This getup looks good on me.  Besides, I paid enough for the damn thing."

Once they began sparring, however, things fell more in line with his expectations.  Dewbie's father had tried to prepare him for the Saiyan fighting style as best as he could, but ultimately the best advice Wampaaan'riix could give him was that there wasn't much use in seeking advice.  The only way to truly understand was to experience it firsthand, and now Dewbie could see what he meant.  

Luffa sparred in her base form, which was still more than powerful enough to kill Dewbie instantly.  He knew she was holding back the vast majority of her strength for his sake, but even so, he still felt as though he was in a real fight and not a friendly exhibition.  When she found an opening in his guard, she seized on it with almost sadistic glee.  When he landed a punch on her solar plexus, he knew she had allowed him to do so, but she still glared at him as if he had tried to kill her, only to smile proudly at him an instant later.  

"Do you trust me, Dewbie?" she asked between strikes.  

Dewbie could only nod as he struggled to block.  Little by little, she had turned up the pressure on him, forcing him to use more and more of his strength to keep up.  As much as it had seemed like a real fight, she was only toying with him, but now Dewbie was fighting as hard as he would have been in actual combat.  

He had seen her transform before.  Not in person, of course, but a handful of lucky spectators had managed to record her in the act, and their blurry, grainy footage had become an instant hit among the Luffa enthusiasts across the galaxy.  He expected her to build up to it, but instead she simply grunted and flashed bright yellow without breaking the rhythm of her strikes.  One second she was dark haired with brown eyes, and in the next she was blonde with green eyes.  Only it wasn't exactly blonde and green.  The colors were more vivid.   It was unsettling to look at her, and Dewbie was unprepared for how strange it was up close.  

He forced himself to stay focused, and as they continued, he realized to his amazement that she was staying focused too.  He could feel how much stronger her ki had become, but she was still holding her strength to the same level she had been using before.  Dewbie's father had suggested to him that she didn't have this sort of fine control over her forms, but that must have changed.  

"Don't slow down now, boy," she said with a grin.  "This was how you wanted it, right?"

It was.  Before, he thought she was using her base form for his safety, but now he could see that she could have sparred with him this way from the start.  The thrill and the honor was greater, but she wanted him to work for it, and now that she had transformed, she wanted him to push himself harder to extend the experience.  He didn't know how much longer he could keep going, but he was determined to find out.  

And then, after what seemed like an eternity, he succumbed to fatigue.  When he  could no longer block Luffa's strikes, she landed five blows to his midsection and shoulders.  They felt surprisingly gentle, but they somehow managed to disrupt all the ki energy in his body, and he collapsed to his knees onto the glacier that had been their battlefield.  He leaned forward and planted his hands on the ice as well, struggling to catch his breath.  

"Well done," Luffa said.  He thought she might have been smiling, but all he could see at the moment were the toes of her black combat boots peeking out from under her wedding dress.  He tried to raise his head to look up at her, and then she cried out.  "Hey, don't move!"

Suddenly he felt a sharp pain in his abdomen, like a muscle spasm.  Dewbie clutched at his gut, wondering what had happened, though he suspected that there was some sort of delayed effect to the last attack Luffa had used on him.  

"Are you okay?" Luffa asked, kneeling down to check on him.  "Dammit, that was just supposed to knock you down, but if I used too much pressure I might have hurt a vital organ--"

"I'm... aces, honest," Dewbie assured her.  "Just need... a sec to... get my groove back."

"Don't try to tough it out, son" she scolded him.  "I can get you back to the ship in no time, and Doc can... can..."

She had put her hand on his massive shoulder, and now he could feel it begin to tremble.  She drew it back quickly and held it tightly in her other hand.  

"You... almost sounded... like Daddio there, champ," Dewbie said.  "I guess when you read... my pop's noggin, some of the pages must have rubbed off on you."

Luffa sighed and sat down on the ice.  "You don't know how right you are," she said.  "Thanks to that botched mind link with your father, I sort of think of you as my own kid.  I mean, not really.  I know better, but I have to keep reminding myself you're not a child.  Hell, you're only a few years younger than me.  You're old enough to decide if you need medical treatment."

"Hey, no problemo," Dewbie said.  "I figured that might have had something to do with you invitin' me out to your pad.  Me and my pops are like family."

"It's more than that," Luffa said.  "You saved me."

"Whuh-huh?"

She hesitated, then gritted her teeth and just started blurting it all out.  "When I first fought your father, Dewbie... well, I was pregnant.  Not very far along, of course.  I didn't know about it myself at the time.  By the time I found out, the Tikosi were experimenting on me.  It would have been a boy.  Your father helped me escape, but by the time he got there, the Tikosi had already removed the fetus."  

"Pops never told me that part," Dewbie said solemnly.  "That's heavy.  I'm sorry."

"I never told your father.  It's... not something I talk about much.  It's painful to think about.  That's why the Makyans tried to use it against me."

"Wait, wait.  Time out.  The which?" Dewbie asked.

"A race of demons," Luffa explained.  "They used a magic potion to try to control me.  It played on my most selfish desire, which was to forget about the pain and shame of losing my baby.  I was strong enough resist it, but I couldn't make myself want to."

"Farrrrr out... Well, how'd you squeeze out of that one?"

Luffa looked at him and smiled.  "As much as I wanted to, I couldn't just forget what had happened to me.  That boy would have grown up to be a mighty Saiyan, and my soul wouldn't rest until I had avenged him.  So my most selfish desire was to have my son back, and the Makyans couldn't give him to me.  They could only make me forget.  It started to drive me nuts.  I started seeing hallucinations of my friends, all of 'em trying to convince me to snap out of it.  Instead, I... well, I killed them all.  Then I hallucinated you.  I tried to kill you too, only I couldn't go through with it."

"Because once you got an eyeful of my handsome mug, it reminded you of your unborn son," Dewbie realized.  

"Exactly," Luffa said.  "Once I came to my senses... Let's just say it'll be a long time before the Makyans try to pull that crap with anyone else."  

Dewbie was curious about details of Luffa's wrath, but something told him it was better that he didn't ask.  

"After that, I was kind of upset about killing those hallucinations," Luffa went on.  "I got in touch with your old man, just so I could sleep better.  He told me that the two of you had gone on a mission to save his old martial arts master.  It was for your rite of ascension.  Way I hear it, you did really well."  

"Well, I couldn't let pops take all the risk for himself," Dewbie said modestly.  "I mean, what kind of a swingin' son would I be then?"

"That's why I invited you here, Dewbie," Luffa said.  "I need you to help me with something.  I think you're the only one I can turn to."

"You gave me that rap before," Dewbie said.  "And ol' Dewbie's keen to lend a hand, but I don't see what good I can do."

Luffa stood up and balled her fists.  "I'll show you," she said.  "First I have to raise my power level."

With that, she began to scream, and a golden aura flashed around her body.  

********

For a moment, bright yellow light was all Dewbie could see.  When it finally faded, he looked around and couldn't believe his eyes.

They had been alone on the glacier, he was sure of that, but now they were surrounded by hundreds--no, thousands--of alien beings.  They were grey, androgynous humanoids covered in blue and purple markings.  They carried unfamiliar tools and rode strange vehicles along the surface of the glacier and through the sky.  In the distance, he could see a fortress.  Dewbie had never seen a species like them before, but there was no mistaking their behavior.  

They were fighting a war.  

In spite of their fierce combat, he couldn't really tell if there was any malice to their actions.  It was hard to interpret their body language at all.  That was when Dewbie finally realized that he couldn't hear them.  For all their activity, there was no sound at all.  

A pair of the creatures ran right up to him.  One was chasing the other.  At last the one being pursued turned and made what Dewbie thought could have been a desperate last stand.  Before he could bring his weapon to bear, his enemy opened fire, and he fell silently to the ice.  A pale grey liquid oozed from his still-smoking wound, but before the fallen warrior died, he managed to return fire with his own weapon, and killed his pursuer in turn.  Then a bomb fell from the sky, and their corpses were disintegrated where they lay.  

None of it made a sound.  The only thing Dewbie could hear was the wind, and the constant, steady thrum of Luffa's Super Saiyan aura.  He turned and saw her standing stoically in the center of it all.  A troop convoy drove by and passed right through her.  She looked at him, and seemed visibly relieved.

"Good," she said.  You can see them too.  I was afraid I'd be the only one. I never told the others about them.  They worry about me enough as it is.  If they heard me talking about ghosts, they'd think I was completely crazy."

"Wh-what's the dillio?" Dewbie asked.

"On this planet, when I increase my power to a certain level, all of this appears," she said, gesturing at the battle surrounding them.  "At first, I thought I was just seeing things.  My powers kind of tie into my emotions, and I've been pushing things pretty hard since I got here.  Eventually, I figured out that it's not my imagination.  They only show up on this planet, and only for as long as I raise my ki to this point.   Early on, this level was near my absolute limit, so I'd only catch glimpses of them.   As I trained and got stronger, I was able to hold this level for a long time, and then I could see them whenever I wanted, for as long as I wanted."

Dewbie reached out to touch another creature that had approached them.   His hand passed through its chest, but it seemed to stare right at him, as if it could see him.  "What are they?" he asked.  "Why are they fighting?"

"They're robots," Luffa said.  "Well, that's my best guess.  They move like machines, and there's something artificial about their faces, like someone was trying to make them look like flesh-and-blood people, but not too closely.  

"They were soldiers.  Could be that someone created them to fight their battles for them, but they're not just automated weapons.  I've been watching them for a while, and I can tell they're intelligent.  I don't know what they're fighting over, but they did it all over the world.  Every time I see them, they're always fighting some giant battle.  It's different everywhere I go.  When I'm over the oceans, they've got boats and planes.  When I'm in the desert, they have tanks.  In the mountains, they've got snipers.  Out here, it's mostly infantry.  I guess they don't mind the cold, so it's easier for them to travel in the snow on foot than to use any vehicles."

"But what good's it do 'em to fight over a planet they can't even touch?" Dewbie asked.   He pointed at the area where the phantom bomb had exploded.  It had destroyed the robots, but the ice they were laying upon was untouched.  

"They're all dead," Luffa said darkly.  "Those two you saw kill each other a minute ago?  I've been here before, and I've seen them do that a dozen times or more.  They all look a lot alike, but I can tell by the markings on their bodies.  They indicate their ranks and identifications somehow.  They look alike, but they're still individuals.  You can tell them apart if you know what to look for.

"What we're seeing is a war they fought on this planet a long time ago.  They all died, and for whatever reason their ghosts are still playing out the same battles over and over again.  At least, that's all I've managed to find out from them."

"You mean you're hip to their lingo?"

"Not exactly," Luffa said.  She tapped her finger against the side of her head. Normal Saiyans have some telepathic abilities, but ever since I first met your father, I've been finding new ways to use them.  When I'm ramped up enough to see these guys, I start to sense their energy, too.  And when I really concentrate, it's like I can feel their emotions.  But it's really faint, and I can't make much sense out of it.  There's so many of them, and they're so... well, different."

"Different?"

"They don't seem to feel the same things that you or I would. You and I are aliens to each other, and there's other life forms that are even stranger, but we all know what it's like to be hungry or tired or scared.  These robots, whatever they are, they're not like that at all.  I can't really tell how they feel.  They're just sort of... dissatisfied."

By now, other robots had abandoned their endless battle to approach Luffa and Dewbie.  Dewbie tried to see what Luffa was talking about in their expressions, but it was useless.  They simply looked at him blankly with their enigmatic blue eyes.  One of them had a large wound on its head, and grey liquid was seeping out of it at an alarming rate, but it paid no heed to this.   Was the injury just not that serious, or did the robot somehow know that it was already dead?  Did it mind?

"I got interested in their battle, so I started exploring the planet, looking for clues," Luffa said.  "The people who sold me this place said it was uninhabited, and there was no sign of even an ancient civilization.  But I saw them using a huge aircraft carrier in the ocean once, and when I went diving in the same place, I found a coral reef about the same size and shape.  In the desert, I turned up some scrap metal that could have been those pikes some of them carry around.  So I'm pretty sure this war they fought happened a really long time ago.  Like, hundreds of thousands of years.  Plenty of time for nature to recover from the damage they did, and erase any evidence of the battle."

She smiled sadly.  "It's beautiful, really.  These guys really tore this place up.  They fought like true warriors, every last one of them, and they're still fighting, long after their cause was forgotten.  It's been an honor to watch them go at it, but I'm not sure they feel the same way.  That's why I need your help.

"The trouble is that I think these guys want

my

help, but I'm not sure what I should do.  I just know they're dissatisfied, but I don't know why.  Maybe they just didn't like how the war turned out, or they want the universe to remember them for their bravery.  One night I was talking to my wife about how Doc doesn't like to fight, and I wondered if maybe these robots are the same way.  What if they were forced into this, and now they're stuck reliving this same battle over and over?"

"Heavy..." was all Dewbie could say.  

"Or maybe they're like the Dorluns, and they're just grateful that they somehow managed to continue to exist.  For all I know, they're not dead, and this is totally normal for them.  Maybe they're like me, and they're being forced into some new form they don't understand.  It might be good for them, and they don't even know it."

The creatures continued to stare at them, their expressions as mysterious as ever.  What had Dewbie's attention now was the troubled look on Luffa's face when she looked at them.  She didn't look like any Saiyan he'd ever seen.  

"I... envy you guys, you know?" she finally said.

"Come back?" Dewbie asked.

"Doc’s not even a fighter, but he’s done braver things than I’ll ever do.  And Keda and Zatte, and you and your father, you all earned the power you have."

She pointed at her hair and shook her head.  "I didn’t do anything to end up like this.  It just happened.  Maybe the Tikosi forced my body to evolve, or I was born with this ability, but either way it was dumb luck.  I have the power to decide the fate of these ghosts, but I don’t think I have the right."

She took Dewbie’s hand in both of hers.  "I know about the Yetitan rites.  You had to prove yourself as an adult warrior.  It’s mostly ceremony, but it’s still proof.  I’m proud of you for that.  I guess that’s why I’m asking for your help."

Luffa pointed at the spirits that had gathered around her aura.  "I have the power to disperse these phantoms, but I don't know whether or not I should.  Tell me what you think I should do with these guys, and I’ll do it."

"That’s a real heavy load, pal-o-mine," Dewbie said.  "I dig that you don’t want to make that call by your lonesome.  Makes sense to get an extra pair of peepers on the scene, and make sure you’re on the beam, but what good does it do to have me take the wheel?"

"I know it’s a lot to ask," Luffa said.  "And there’s no way to know if you’ll be making the right decision, but I know you and I know your heart's in the right place.  Whatever you come up with, right or wrong, at least it'll be honorable."

"Heavy," Dewbie muttered.  "I mean real heavy.  I hope you’re not in a rush, ’cause this little Yetitan’s gonna have to do some first-class thinkin’ on this one.  Like, real Grade A, you dig?"

"Take your time, Dewbie." Luffa said.  "I can hold this power level for a while.  I can do that much at least, no problem."

Dewbie nodded and sat down on the ground.  As he considered the dilemma, the ghosts continued to gather around them, and some of them started to lose their shape.   They floated and swirled around Dewbie and Luffa, making gestures he could not begin to understand.  Beside him, Luffa grimaced and her aura continued to flash and hum.

*******

Some time later, Dewbie broke his silence to ask a question: "Luffa, you need to take five?"

"I’m fine," she said.

"Roger that, mama bear, I know my fave can handle anything, but I’ve been at this a while..."

She shook her head.  "I told you to take your time, boy.  It’s.... important."

"I dig, but my noggin’ can tackle this without the visuals for a while."

"No," Luffa said.  "It’s bad enough I’m asking you to decide this for me.  The least I can do for these people is make them visible, so you can see what’s on the line."

"No kiddin’, huh?  This must be that Saiyan pride I heard so much about."

She looked at him and smiled.  "You’re damned right," she growled.

He looked at her, and considered the grim determination on her face.  He had no idea what her limits were.  The only being in the galaxy stronger than Luffa was the Shockmaster, and she was determined to surpass him.  For all Dewbie knew, she already had.  He didn't know how much longer she could maintain her current power level, but sooner or later she would succumb to fatigue just as he had done during their sparring session.  The point Luffa wanted to impress upon him then was not to hold out forever, but simply to last as long as he could, and then a little bit longer, and then a little bit longer than that.  

That was why Saiyans like Luffa seemed to treat their sparring matches like genuine combat.  Luffa vs. Dewbie was a complete mismatch, but that wasn't the point.  The point was to force Dewbie to confront himself, and Dewbie vs. Dewbie was a lifelong rivalry.  In the long run, it was the only rivalry that really mattered for him.

"You'd do this all day long if you had to," Dewbie observed.  

Luffa's only reply was to scrunch up her face and ball her fists tighter.  

"Well, you can cool it," Dewbie said,  "because I’m all through thinkin’.  It’s decision time, and ol’ Judge Dewbie’s ready to rule."

Luffa sighed with relief, but didn't relax her energy.  "Thanks," she said.  "What’ll it be?"

Dewbie rose to his feet and took a deep breath.  "Don't take this the wrong way, but I’m leavin’ it up to you." he said.

She glared at him, her face revealing some of the fatigue she had been trying to conceal.  "Dewbie, I’m serious--"

"Well that makes two of us, ’cause I'm serious too."

"Dammit!" she shouted, and her aura flared up in size.  The ground shook beneath Dewbie’s feet.  He wobbled slightly, but maintained his footing, and kept his eyes on Luffa.  He didn’t expect her to attack, and there wasn't much he could do about it if she actually did, but he was trained to anticipate the possibility regardless.

She waved her hands at the silent images that were watching them.  "Don’t you get it?" she demanded.  "These people need an answer, Dewbie!  They’ve been waiting for one long enough, haven’t they?  Can’t you see that?!"

"Course I can.  Like, twenty-twenty, even."

Her hands were trembling as she gestured wildly at him.  "Don’t you care what happens to them?!"

"Totally, my dude."

"Then why won’t you decide?" Luffa demanded.  Dewbie could see tears welling up in her eyes.

"Because you care about ’em even more than I do."

Luffa was stunned to hear this.  "What?"

"You’ve been pushin’ yourself to the limit this whole time, just so you could find out what was wrong with these peeps," Dewbie explained.  "And you were so worried about checkin’ the wrong box on what to do for ’em, you stood here and strained yourself for an hour while you waited for me to figure somethin’ out."

"I’m not straining myself," Luffa insisted.  "I told you I can keep this level up for--"

"--for as long as it takes, yeah, I heard this song before, mama bear," Dewbie said.  "But why should you lift the proverbial finger, unless you were worried about these guys?"

"I just... I feel bad for them, okay?" Luffa said.  "And I need the workout anyway, so what’s the harm?"

"You wanted me to make the call because you thought I’d make an honorable decision," Dewbie said, "But *nobody’s* honored these far out groovy ghoulies more than you.  If anyone’s got the right to decide their fate, it’s you, lady."

"But... I’m not... You were the one who..."

He shook his head.  "I know you had that real bad trip, and you got back into your groove when you had a way-out vision of me," Dewbie said.  "But I’m thinkin’ what you really saw back then wasn't me, or even your own son.  What you saw was your conscience."

"My...?"

"Sure," Dewbie said.  He raised an eyebrow and began to stroke his hairy chin.  "Every cat and kitten in the universe has one, you know.  Just so happens your conscience just looks a little handsomer than most folks’."

"What if you’re wrong?!" Luffa asked.

"You brought me in on this because you trusted me to make the best call, didn’t you?" Dewbie said with a shrug.  "Well my call is for you to trust your lonesome.  My call is that you’ve known that from the get-go, but maybe you needed to hear someone else say it."

Luffa turned away from him.  "Maybe I did," she said.  "No matter what I do, we’ll never know for sure if it was right. I just have to do the best I can."

"Sounds like the sort of rap I had to learn for the manhood rites on Yetitan," Dewbie said.  "Maybe you had it wrong, and you really did earn your power somewhere along the way.  You might've took a different route, but your boots are just as worn as mine.  Well, I don't wear kicks myself.  Ol' Dewbie likes to keep things natural, if you know what I mean."

She looked at her hands, then clenched them into fists.  "Brace yourself," she said.  "This shouldn’t take long."

"What are you gonna do?" Dewbie asked.

"What I should have done from the start," Luffa said.  "Thanks, boy.  Thanks for giving me a swift kick in the butt."

She summoned her ki, and Dewbie crossed his arms in front of his face as her aura produced a terrible wind.  Around them, the spirits streaked through the air, wailing silently, and making their incomprehensible gestures.

In the center of it all, Luffa screamed.  She put her fingers against her head, and Dewbie suspected that she was in pain.  In spite of his advice, he still had an impulse to reach out, to try and help her somehow, but he knew better.  Even if he knew what to do for her, even if he had the power, it was better this way.

So instead he concentrated his ki on protecting himself, and he admired his hero, his father’s friend, his friend, who loved him like a son.

And when she was finished, and she powered down her her normal form, and the ghosts vanished, and she fell to her hands and knees, only then did Dewbaaac’nogg rush to her aid, scooping her up like a Yetitan cub in his massive arms.

*******

Thousands of miles away, Luffa lay on a beach, massaging her scalp.  She opened her eyes and found Dewbie looming over her, his white fur soggy from swimming.  With all of his hair matted down, he looked much slimmer than usual.  The hair on his head had gone limp, but the dye had somehow managed to resist the effects of the seawater.  In his hand he held a large fish.  

"Figured you'd want some chow," he said cordially.  

Luffa sat up and ripped the fish out of his hand, then started ripping it to pieces with her hands and teeth.  Dewbie was unnerved, but pleased to see he his fishing expedition had been worth the trouble.  In a matter of minutes there was nothing left of his catch but bones and sraps of connective tissue.  

"Thanks," Luffa said.  She grabbed the hem of her wedding gown and wiped the blood from her mouth.  “Thanks for everything.”

"What's your twenty?" Dewbie asked.  "Feelin' any better?"

"My head is killing me," Luffa groaned.  "I'm starting to think I only held off for so long because I knew how hard it would be."

"But it did the trick, right?" Dewbie asked hopefully.  "That crazy psychic power you used fed the bulldog, didn't it?"

"I think so," Luffa said wearily.  She snapped a small rib bone off the fish's skeleton and started picking her teeth with it.  "I used something similar when I broke the spell the Makyans used on me.  As I pushed against the robots to destroy them, I could get a better connection with their emotions.  So at least I got a better understanding of them."

She turned her head and spit on the sand.  "I'm not gonna pretend I have all the answers, but I think they understood what I was doing and why.  It may not have been what they needed, but I think they knew this was the best ending they could get.  Someone else might have come along who could really help them, but who knows how long they'd have to wait.  I'm pretty sure they were tired of waiting.  I don't know."

"Maybe we oughta boogie on back to your ship," Dewbie suggested.  "We both went through the ringer today.  Even if it's nothing serious, might not be bad to have Doc Topsas give us the once-over."

Luffa nodded, and opened her mouth as if to agree, and then she stopped short.  "No," she said.  "We can't do that.  Not for a while, anyway.  Doc's... uh... well, he's busy."

"Busy?"

Luffa's face and ears had turned red.  "That's why I was late meeting up with you," she said.  "We had a situation back at the house, and..."

*******

Aboard Luffa’s star-yacht, Dr. Topsas carefully ran his fingers over Zatte’s left hand.  Satisfied with the tactile examination, he moved on to her thoracic wall, then consulted a set of scans of her skeleton. 

"Fortunately, the Plantians have stocked the ship's sickbay with a generous supply of superpolymorphic unleashing gel," he said cheerfully.  "So if something like this ever happens in the future, you can repair a cracked rib or a sprained wrist in a fraction of the time it would normally take."

Gingerly, Zatte sat up from the examination tabled and sighed.  "I'll keep that in mind, doctor," she said.  

"Are you feeling all right, Ms. Zatte?" he asked.  

"Still a little sore, but a lot better than I was two hours ago," she said.  "Uh... thanks for not asking how this happened.   The whole thing’s silly and Luffa’s even more embarrassed about it than I am... "

"Say no more, Ms. Zatte” Topsas said.   “I was a young newlywed myself once..."  

NEXT: Shock to the System.

[sentrava]

What’s On in Stockholm: December 2017

The winter darkness has taken hold, but the Swedes have strung lights and warmed glögg. So steal yourself away from the cozy blankets and fireside (we know, it’s hard) to enjoy the cheer of December events! Even for the most hibernation-prone among us, there will be something fun to do, we promise.

Here’s what’s happening in Stockholm this December:

Friday 1st – Saturday 2nd December

Poster Market at ARK

ARK and Konstfack have paired up to bring us drawings and screen prints at great prices. You know that blank spot on the wall you’ve been trying to fill? Looks like we found your fix.

    Friday 1st – Sunday 3rd December

arab film festival at zita folkets bio

Hosted by the Malmö Arab Film Festival, this weekend of events focuses on Arab film in the western world. Along with film screenings all weekend, there will be a seminar about violence against women in Arab film on Saturday. Some events are free, but all require a festival pass.

    Saturday 2nd – Sunday 3rd December

konstfacks julmarknad at konstfack

There are plenty of Christmas markets in Stockholm area, including the Drottningholms Slot and Schysst Jul markets, but the Konstfacks market is one you don’t want to miss! Find one-of-a-kind pieces of art created by the students of Konstfack. Be sure to bring cash for the 20 kr entrance fee.

    Friday 1st, Friday 8th, & Friday 15th December

Lost in Translation at Boulevard Teatern

Need a laugh on one of these dark nights? Head to the Boulevard Teatern for a comedy show (in English) about life in Sweden as a foreigner and laugh at yourself a little!

    Sunday 3rd – Monday 4th December

Fleet Foxes at Annexet

The Fleet Foxes are making a stop in Stockholm on their world tour of their third album, Crack-Up. Soothing, yet edgy – perfect for the winter!

    Monday 4th – Wednesday 6th December

Happiness Program

Don’t let the darkness get you down! Treat yourself to this three-day program: learn techniques to manage daily stress and maintain happiness.

    Tuesday 5th December

Femtech #9 at SUP46

Remember Start-Up People of Sweden (SUP46)? They’re back with their ninth FemTech event! Listen to a panel of inspiring women in the tech world, and hear a few pitch their ideas.

    Friday 8th December

art from the heart at wip: sthlm

Come to the opening of the exhibition “Art From the Heart,” where female and non-binary black artists have an opportunity to share their stories through their artwork.

    Nobelberget Christmas Market at nobelberget marknad

Nobelberget brings us another night of fun. Vintage and flea markets, art, food trucks, drinks, live music…what more could you want?

    Saturday 9th December

Finding peace within chaos at Yos Yoga

Take a break from holiday stress to re-center with Rebecca O’Brien, a Certified Stress Management & Relaxation Therapist. Relaxation exercises and an informative talk about stress are held in English.

    Sunday 10th December

Stockholm Santa Run in Kungsträdgården

Proceeds of this 3 km fun run go to Aktivisfonden, Barncancerfonden and Läkare Utan Gränser. All are welcome, so join the Christmas spirit of giving with this charity run!

    Feminist Market

Shop for artwork by female designers and enjoy brunch at Calexico at the Feminist Market.

    Wednesday 13th December

marc e bassy at obaren

Marc E. Bassy, the American R&B singer, was a member of 2AM Club before making it on his own. See him at the intimate Obaren for free – it’s “So Simple,” you can’t miss it!

    Wednesday 13th – Thursday 14th December

lucia by SK neptun konstsim

Celebrate Lucia, the bearer of light, and watch the Neptun Synchronized Swimming Club’s procession with a twist! Be aware of the location and date you choose, as they vary.

    Friday 15th – Sunday 17th December

FeminEast Festival at Södra Teatern

The FeminEast Festival highlights female artists from the Middle East. Concerts range from the jazz group Golnar & Mahan, to rap from Linda Pira.

    Sunday 17th December

Night Swim at Selma

Selma City Spa is opening for a special evening of relaxation. The ticket covers entrance to the spa, rooftop pool, sauna, tea and snacks. We’re already starting to feel more relaxed…

    Wednesday 20th & Wednesday 27th December

Snowshoe Winter Hiking

Venture outdoors with Green Trails, and snowshoe through a winter wonderland. You may even spot some wildlife!

    Wednesday 20th December

Sleeping Beauty ballet at Cirkus

Moscow State Ballet and Orchestra perform the classic story of Princess Aurora. An enchanting evening at the ballet? We’re in!

    eat that question: frank zappa in his own words at bio rio

A documentary about the musician Frank Zappa. His talent was surely complimented by his mustache.

    Thursday 21st December

Winter Wonder World: Queer Edition at Bångska Våningen

Cinema Queer is here for a mini-festival! Watch some short films in a magical winter wonderland on the shortest day of the year.

    Sunday 31st December

new year’s eve ball at nalen

Dinner, a show, and a…masquerade ball? Finally, a chance to experience the magic of masquerades, like in the movies!

    new year’s eve at skansen

Watch the fireworks over the city, and listen to a recital of Lord Tennyson’s “Ring Out Wild Bells” poem at midnight this New Year’s Eve. Get a group together for a discounted price!

    Ongoing in December

Loving Vincent at Kulturhuset Stadsteatern

Fan of Vincent Van Gogh? Head to Kulturhuset by Tuesday 5th December to watch this film for 120 kr. It’s the first fully oil-animated film and is in English.

stockholm christmas village in kungsträdgården

From Friday 1st to Saturday 23rd December, Kungsträdgården is hosting a Christmas party with free entry. Enjoy music, shop at Beyond Retro for an ugly Christmas sweater, and test out your pirouettes on the ice rink!

    Fashion in Five Acts at kulturhuset stadsteatern

Graduate students of Borås Textilhögskola showcase their work at this free exhibit.

    Gingerbread Houses at arkDes

Admire the architectural integrity of gingerbread houses – and leave hungry for some pepparkakor. Open the entire month of December.

    invisible exhibition

Book a tour (available in English) for this interactive exhibition. A visually impaired guide, as well as your own senses, will lead you through the dark. This exhibit may open your eyes in a completely new way.

    Fearless & Fabulous at Fotografiska

Chen Man’s first solo museum exhibit outside of China is coming to Stockholm on the 9th of December until the 4th of March. Chen Man is a highly sought after fashion and portrait photographer whose work defies categorization. This is an exhibit you don’t want to miss.

  Don’t forget: all the 2017 Holidays & Flag Days are here.

If you’re a business or organisation that would like us to add your event to next month’s calendar, please contact us at hello [@] scandinaviastandard [dot] com. Thank you!

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[technewss15-blog]

The Sports Desk – Six Things Sports Game Fans Are Dying To See That Won't Happen

Giving up isn’t something athletes do; you never know when a team is going to comeback and snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. And yet there are some things in the sports video game universe that I’m safe in saying won’t happen. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but here you go…

NCAA Football Comes Back

July is usually a time for summer frivolity, but now it instead serves as a bitter reminder that we are bereft of an NCAA Football title. Due to ongoing licensing and paid-compensation issues surrounding an unholy legal morass involving the NCAA, Electronic Arts, universities, conferences, and the players themselves, we are without college football now, and I predict, for a long time.

With the battle over whether student-athletes should be paid for playing eating away at the NCAA, there is no going back to the way things were. At best, players, universities, and all the real-life entities could work together to offer a comprehensive licensing package, but I believe the cost of this would be prohibitive to a studio like EA Sports for a product that is not a huge seller. What I believe is more likely is that EA Sports would have to go to each individual player, conference, and school to get their licensing rights individually or in groups, creating a huge cost for inclusion. We all know that just getting some of the players or schools is not the kind of experience fans want. It’s all or nothing, and I think it’ll be the latter when it comes to NCAA football.

NFL License Exclusivity Ends

Ever since the NFL signed an exclusivity agreement with EA and its Madden series, fans have missed the competition brought by rival developer Visual Concepts and its NFL 2K series. But regardless whether you like Madden or not, it’s the NFL that determines who gets its license, and the league prefers single brand partnerships. Madden is a high-profile, successful series that the league is happy to align with, and therefore I think the two will continue to work with each other exclusively until either the series’ quality drops off a cliff or the NFL ceases to be popular. I don’t think either will happen anytime soon.

Major Sports Games Go Non-Yearly

While some sports titles like UFC aren’t currently yearly, your Maddens, FIFAs, NBA 2Ks, etc. will stick to the yearly schedule. The companies involved currently make a lot of money doing that, and it’s very reliable income that helps power those companies on the whole. Other than the financial concerns, I spoke to one sports developer who cast a bright side on the practice of yearly sports titles: Unlike persistent PC titles that update with features big and small, the yearly schedule – even with its short development turnaround – can switch or upgrade engines from year to year (similar to how EA started using the Frostbite engine recently), something they said wouldn’t be possible if titles like Madden only kept adding to the same platform. Not having graphical jumps might not harm an MMORPG, for example, but it would be very conspicuous for a sports title before long.

There’s also a certain momentum that accompanies a stable yearly schedule. Look at EA’s NBA series, which has missed multiple yearly iterations. While the early word on the NBA Live 18 is that it’s better than some of the previous incarnations of the series, even with multiple years to craft the product it still doesn’t have near the feature set nor polish of the yearly NBA 2K franchise.

Servers For Old Games Are Kept On

Every year there is a story about how the servers for a five-year-old sports title are being turned off, which causes the fans still playing those titles to become outraged. Time may have moved on for everyone else, but for whatever the reason – whether it’s a certain feature or the gameplay – these fans are still playing the title even though it’s well past its prime. Server space isn’t infinite, and it makes sense that the publisher and/or developer would move on from spending resources on an old title. This happens in other genres as well, such as shooters or MMORPGs, but given how many sports titles keep coming out, the leash is particularly short for sports titles. Besides, a company would much rather you buy the new title than hang on to an old one.

Microtransactions Go Away

With modes featuring microtransactions such as Ultimate Team making so much money ($800 million a year for EA in particular), there’s no way this is going away. No way.

The Return of The Full First-Party Sports Slate

There used to be a time when the first-parties put out a full lineup of sports titles, from football to hockey. With licenses and development costs, those companies determined it’s not worth the money to have the third-best NBA title, for instance.

Not only would Sony or Microsoft find that getting back in the game not worth it these days from a competition standpoint, their first-party studio system is currently not equipped to deal with what it takes to put out sports titles anymore. Sony’s 989 studios is long gone, and Microsoft’s entire first-party studio structure as a whole has atrophied. Putting out a sports title requires a dedicated sports developer, not someone whom just dabbles on the side, and I don’t think any of the platform manufacturers have anything close to the appetite necessary to go back to the glory days.

Nintendo, as always, is its own beast. While the Switch is hosting sports titles like NBA 2K18 and FIFA 18, Nintendo has never been interested in adopting a regular sports schedule of titles apart from exercises like Mario Golf/Tennis, and casual-focused rec sports titles. There’s nothing wrong with this, but I would never expect that philosophy to morph into a full-on sports strategy like EA’s, for instance.

Missed some of the previous Sports Desk entries? Take a look at the past installments via our Hub page by clicking on the banner below.

Have a suggestion or comment? Put it in the comments section below, send me an email, or reach me on twitter at @mattkato.

REVIEW ROUND-UP Madden NFL 18 NASCAR Heat 2 NHL 18 Pro Evolution Soccer 2018

RELEASE LIST NBA 2K18 (PS4, Xbox One, Switch, PC, PS3, 360) – September 19 Project Cars 2 (PS4, Xbox One, PC) – September 22 FIFA 18 (above)(PS4, Xbox One, Switch, PC, PS3, 360) – September 29 Forza Motorsport 7 (Xbox One, PC) – October 3 GT Sport (PS4) – October 17

THE TICKER A quick rundown of some of the sports news from the week PES 2018 Licensing Spree Continues With Liverpool Legends Includes Steven Gerrard, Steve McManaman, Kevin Keegan, and more.

NBA 2K18 on Switch Requires MicroSD Card and Comes With Large Update

NBA 2K18 Momentous Trailer

The Sports Desk – Six Things Sports Game Fans Are Dying To See That Won’t Happen was originally published on Tech News Center Generation