#women dislike hondas
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#honda#women dislike hondas#women who dislikes hondas#honda civic#honda accord#why#driving a honda#dont pull up in a honda
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Okay, I've been binge watching the Stop!!Hibari-kun anime and I've got some thoughts I need to let out.
Firstly, watching the anime makes me appreciate the Manga a hundred times more. Sure, the Manga had its problems, mostly the racism and the casual homophobia jokes and transphobia, but you could save stuff from it, like that even though there were homophobic jokes there was a gay woman who wasn't mocked because of her attraction to Hibari, or that despite the transphobia Hibari was never outright shown as being wrong by being herself.
Now, the anime does a lot of things I dislike. Firstly they make Kosaku's reactions be way more negative than in the Manga. While yes, he reacts negatively he is also seen blushing a lot when Hibari flirts with him. I may need to read the Manga for fourth time, but I also don't remember Kosaku constantly mentioning Hibari is a "guy" everytime she did anything.
There is a lot much more racism in the anime. There were problems with this in the Manga but it just feels way more present in the anime.
This one doesn't bother me too much, but I'm pretty sure the chapters do not align with the Manga, but again, this doesn't bother me.
I also noticed way more incest jokes, I don't care about them. Also the Seiji chapter where he falls in love with one of Hibari's bullies when she's 15 and Seiji is around 25/30 is very questionable. Again, this is a work of fiction so while I was like "why isn't this seen wrong?" I wasn't really uncomfortable. I do gotta say that in the Manga when the Japanese mob grown manchild son asked for Hibari's hand in marriage, it was inmediatly said he was 28 and Hibari was super taken aback. This doesn't happen in the anime, his age is NEVER mentioned. I can't quite remember, but I am sure Hibari also doesn't go on a date with him.
Oof, but here we go with the thing that has bothered me the most. The REALLY bad erasure of Jun's story. They absolutely took away her lesbianism, making it seem as if she was only interested in Hibari because of her volleyball abilities. They also totally changed the episode and made Jun be deeply ashamed of her family, that while in the Manga she was a bit embarassed it wasn't a main focus. In the Anime it was, even making her leave the volleyball club, which is crazy to me. Oh, and I'm NOT forgetting that they made Hibari enjoy getting gropped in the bus, when in the Manga she was clearly just disgusted by it.
I haven't finished it yet, may edit this post with more complains. Positive things? I'm sure Seiji and Sabu didn't have names in the Manga, so now they have identities. They try and give them more backstory, even adding an eye scar to Sabu, which was appreciated. Hibari's voice is absolutely the cutest. I liked the wrestling episode. Oh, the episode with Hibari's mother and her father was a delight, she didn't express this much emotion in the Manga, so actually seeing how she feels was great, and her end interaction with her father was adorable.
Can't remember anything more rn. As a side note, I've developed a little crush on Sabu and I'm gonna draw him. Hope you enjoyed my rambling!
EDIT:
Remembered the Honda thing. In the Anime he almost reaches his 1000 girls flirted with, but with one it is half a girl. In the Manga this was because he looked at a 5 year old by accident and she fell in love, while in the anime they made it so he flirted with a new half. For those who don't know, new half is an old Japanese term for transgender people, mostly trans women who were post op. In the subtitles this is translated as crossdresser, which I don't like. This isn't the first time this term is mentioned, in the spartan son episode, he calls Hibari a new half, which Kosaku tells him to not do. In another chapter there is a trans woman, and she refers to herself as New half, which again is incorrectly translated to crossdresser for some reason.
Even then there was some sort of minimal knowledge of trans people, not only with this, but in the Manga the addition of Genkijirou being a canonical trans man in hormones. Eguchi was aware and while his first idea was to make Hibari a feminine man, it obviously end up with her being a trans woman.
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which of the SF characters would watch Oppennheimer and which would watch Barbie ?
Not doing all of them but
Ryu: Barbie. Probably got dragged into it by Sakura. Didn't get most of it but he liked it. Hopes Ken is doing allright ("I too know what it's like to struggle with my worst self") and gifts his Ken a "I am Kenough" shirt.
Ken: Mel wanted to watch Oppenheimer and Ken went along with him. Mel liked it, but Ken got bummed out at the story of a neglectful husband and father trying his best to help people and ruining lives over it.
Chun-Li: Her and Li-Fen went to Barbie in matching outfits. The mother's speech in the middle of the movie really, really resonated with her.
E. Honda: Goes to Barbie screenings painted pink to promote his business. If you even think about suggesting Oppenheimer to him he will slap you and you will deserve it.
Blanka: Barbie. Loved it, a little confused but trying to get the spirit, called up his mom and Sakura later to apologize in case he ever oppressed them or made them feel inadequate. Look out for pink variants of Blanka-chan in stores soon.
Guile: Neither, but his family dragged into Barbie. Spent most of it stone-faced but by the time of the Just Ken musical battle number he did crack up a bit.
Dhalsim: Neither.
Zangief: Went to Barbie with R.Mika. Laughed so loudly during the movie you could hear it outside the room. Launches an all-women wrestling course because he thinks muscle power is the solution to misogyny as it is to everything. Marisa enrolls in for a laugh.
Balrog: Neither. Thinks long movies suck and wouldnt be caught dead attending a girl movie.
Vega: Enjoyed both from a reserved patrician distance, couldnt relate to either of the protagonists in any way. Offended by the existence of Weird Barbie and the scenes with old women in it.
Sagat: Neither. But if one of the kids at his village asked, he would go watch Barbie with them and pretend he had a good time, would heavily criticize Ken for betraying his community in vain pursuits of power.
M. Bison: Barbie, and he likes it, not even for any nefarious reason. Doesn't care to watch Oppenheimer, 3 hours of a guy getting cold feet about doing something that Bison happily does at home for free (murdering scores of innocent civilians).
Cammy: Oppenheimer. Only attended Barbie because the other Dolls asked her to, but she didn't think much of it.
Dee Jay: Barbie, and he had a great time. Plays his own remixes of Just Ken and Dance the Night for several nights at the club afterwards.
Akuma: Neither. If he did, he would quit Oppenheimer in the first minutes, in disgust at Oppenheimer's weakness for trying to murder his teacher with a poisoned apple instead of his bare hands.
Dan: Didn't plan to watch either but people kept seeing him in the street and assuming he was on his way to watch Barbie. After doing so, he tries to aggressively rebrand the Saikyo Dojo as a feminist dreamhouse over the following weeks and fails.
Nash: Oppenheimer. Didn't feel anything other than sadness.
Rose: Doesn't enjoy movies very much, her powers predict the entire plot before it happens, but still went to watch Barbie with Menat and Maggio.
Sodom: Neither, but protests Oppenheimer screenings in defense of Japan and genuine disgust over the movie's subject matter, runs away crying whenever it's pointed out that he's a white jock.
Rolento: Disliked Oppenheimer for the protagonist being a lily-livered coward who couldnt stand by his own choices in defense of the country.
Sakura: Barbie. Had fun, but the parts where Barbie punches a guy and outruns the police and the mother outfoxes the Mattel executives in a car chase is kinda what she wished most of the movie was like, dissappointed only the Kens got to fight.
Gen: Neither. Dead.
Cody: Barbie. Liked it fine, I guess, wasn't boring.
Dudley: Went with Elena to watch Barbie. Found it a smashing good time and felt offended at how rudely the Kens treated the Barbies when they took over.
Necro: Cried during both with Effie. Barbie's crisis over her humanity and her moment at the bench really got to him.
Hugo: Went with Poison to watch Barbie. Enjoyed it more than she did, found himself relating a lot to the tiny violent Allan man who belongs nowhere.
Makoto: Barbie. Didn't like the daughter's character arc one bit and walked out of it hating Barbie as a concept more .
Rufus: Went to Barbie at Candy's insistence and my God you could not get this man to shut up about it for days afterwards. Added feminist to the list of self-aggrandizing adjectives he uses.
Seth: Pre-Doll Zero, he would have watched Oppenheimer and not liked it for it's preoccupation with pathetic human morality. Post-Doll Zero, he would resonate unbelievably hard with Barbie's arc and have a breakdown over the ending.
Juri: Saw both. Spend the entirety of Oppenheimer browsing her phone and making loud bomb/fart noises with her mouth and laughing. Thought Barbie sucked.
Poison: Went with Hugo to watch Barbie and kept planning ways to cash in the pink/Barbie craze for her business. Thought the movie was funny but kinda dumb.
Rashid: Barbie, really really liked it. Pirates the movie before it's out on digital to make a reaction stream and gets sued over it.
F.A.N.G: Oppenheimer. Besides the skin melting scene, dissappointed at how little it showed the scientific process behind building an atomic bomb or civilians dying, he kinda signed up just for those things.
Luke: Liked both, really wants to have his own Mojo Dojo Casa House and, besides the whole oppressing women thing which is totally uncool, doesn't think the Kens were doing anything that wrong.
Jamie: Wanted to watch Barbie but drunkenly wandered into Oppenheimer by mistake and had a really bad time.
Manon: Criticizes Barbie for muddled politics and found Barbie apologizing to Ken at the end viscerally disgusting.
Marisa: Neither. Went to watch Meg 2 because watching action stars fight a giant rampaging shark seemed like more of a good time to her. Thought the first one was a lot better.
JP: Majority shareholder at Mattel stock, politely claps during the screening.
AKI: Has spent the last weeks furiously testing out poisons on various plastics and chasing down Mattel executives for intel. Has a cunning plan to take over Barbieland and gift it to her master.
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Ranking the programs at GPF - the Junior Women SP edition
Was it the best junior women’s field at JGPF in ages ? Imho yes without a question. Great skating all around, some pretty stunning programs and loads of (hopefully) future stars.
And it showed in the choreography. I enjoyed most of theses programs, some have outright made my best of the season list.
As usual, from least favorite to favorite
6 - Chaeyeon Kim - Everybody Knows, choreo by Yeaji Shin
Chaeyeon Kim is that rare skater of whom I can I say that I love her packaging... While disliking her programs this season.
Let me explain : while most Korean ladies, junior and senior, are packaged as classical, lyrical skaters, with long lines, shimmering dresses and tiaras, and while they nearly all have to skate the inevitable Yuna Kim tribute (still have PTSD from the Oly season), Chaeyeon stands out in imho the best ways.
Her skating is nothing like those of her teammates. It’s much more agressive, combative. Her music choices feel outside the box, so does her choreo, which is more likely to feature split jumps, flying kicks, than Ina Bauers and flowy arms.
And it’s good ! Her SP infortunately isn’t. It’s far too busy and instead of a Yuna Kim tribute, you end up with something looking like it came straight from Dany G and Tutberidze team.
Also junior skaters and fresh seniors shouldn’t skate to a Leonard Cohen song, especially this one. Especially when the lyrics include
“Everybody knows that the naked men and women
Are just a Shining artefact of the past
Everybody knows the scene is dead”
I don’t think Chaeyeon can understand, let alone interpret those lyrics
5 - Jia Shin - The Giving, choreo by Yeaji Shin
Ranked low because that short failed to leave an impression. I can’t even recall what the music was, besides “that thing Marin Honda skated to once”.
And tbh it’s a disservice to Jia. I’m not that fond of the “Jia vs Mao, Yuna vs Mao 2.0″ dynamic developping because hype and kids don’t mix, but if we go down that road, I think that compared to Mao Shimada, Jia’s team really dropped the ball on the choreo this year. Mao’s programs were perfectly suited to her strengths, punchy and memorable, be it because of the costume (bright yellow Mao as Little Simba), or because of the choreo (that stunning choreo sequence in Passepied). Jia’s team probably attempted something more mature and elevated, which ended up being way too muted and failed to showcase what a stunning skater Jia is (her FS is better in that regard).
4 - Mao Shimada - The Lion King, choreo by Cathy Reed
Not the best thing there is, all in all it’s a pretty standard junior program, and it does its job perfectly. It fits Mao perfectly : it’s fun, it’s feisty, it’s cute. The music is an easy crowd pleaser, the dress is glorious.
3 - Minsol Kwon - Danse Macabre, choreo by Yeaji Shin
Speaking of inevitable Yuna Kim tributes... I don’t mind them among juniors. It’s absurd to expect individuality or personnal taste from junior skaters. They are learning and maturing, and doing that by skating tributes to former great skaters, or by skating to warhorses, where the interpretation might be easier, is a pretty good choice. It’s like learning your classics before composing.
Like Mao, this SP is nothing special but it helps that Minsol is hands down the best performer in this field, none of the juniors come close to the intensity she puts on the ice. And Danse Macabre is such a fun piece of music for that.
2 - Ami Nakai - I Got Rythm, choreo by Akiko Suzuki
First of all, I’m a sucker for I Got Rythm programs
Second of all, Ami Nakai had the performance of the day at JGPF. She went into it with so much speed and enthusiasm, she had a wobble on one of her spin. But besides that this was stunning. And I’ll stand by that, she was underscored. While yes her jump technique can be scary, and is far from the likes of Chaeyeon, Jia or Mao, her PCS should be up there with Jia and Mao. She has arguably the best SS of the field, very good posture and good musicality.
Third of all, Akiko Suzuki’s choreo is very good. The step sequence in particular is a stand out, and at JGPF, Ami managed to get level 4.
1 - Hana Yoshida - Dog Days Are Over, choreo by Lori Nichol
When Lori is on, she delivers all time bangers. Hana’s SP is a gem. The choreo is perfect and chock full of small details that highlights the lyrics. The bestie squats while she does the wave with her arms, while Florence’s voice swirls. Running on the ice, The head skaing choreo. The shoulder shrug...
And it’s such a shame that Hana basically peaked at her JGP events, and her season went kinds downhill after that. At Courchevel it was glorious, but she never managed again to be relaxed enough to sell it.
But it was glorious.
#figure skating#ranking programs is my passion#chaeyeon kim#mao shimada#minsol kwon#ami nakai#hana yoshida#jia shin#jgpf 2023
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Change Alone is Neutral
Today I watched Street Fighter: The Movie. The live-action one, where Ming-Na Wen is Chun-Li and Guile is French.
For the uninitiated, Street Fighter: The Movie bears a surface-level resemblance to its namesake (or, the sequel to its namesake, rather) but diverges dramatically in various ways. Balrog's a good guy, Chun-Li's a journalist, and Zangief's... still a good guy, but he's VERY confused & susceptible to propaganda - relatable, amirite?
Now, when movies based on video games get talked about, the prevailing narrative is that they would be just peachy were it not for how many pesky CHANGES get made in the process of adapting the source material.
The primary audience for a video game adaptation ought to be the fans of the source material, after all, right? No Street Fighter fans went to theaters to see Street Fighter: The Movie in hopes of seeing, I dunno, Ryu entering into a found-family with his small-town cop bestie.
That all makes some amount of sense, but the truth isn't as simple as "is change good or bad?" That's yet another binary contrived to make sense of a chaotic world that defies description at its most beautiful.
No - to get to the heart of this, we're gonna have to take what I think I'll call a "step into the grey." Leave black-and-white behind and focus on what's in between it all.
So Street Fighter: The Movie is different. So what?
For one, it means we have an hour and 42 minutes of Balrog getting the heroic turn he's not gotten in the games in his 30+ years of character history. What they did to poor Grand L. Bush's hair in the film aside, I'd call everything in his depiction in the film a step up.
Gone are the constantly bugged-out eyes, gone is the characterization that (in the words of the Street Fighter fan wiki) paints him as a "greedy American boxer who loves booze, gambling and women." In the film he's a consistently-sympathetic figure who the audience is meant to root for, along with Chun-Li and E. Honda.
Now, is there anything wrong with Balrog being a villain in the actual Street Fighter games?... Not on its own but, in lieu of opening that can of beans, I'll just say it was refreshing to see him portrayed so positively.
The film setting itself apart from the games also means that the face of the damn series, Ryu, gets sidelined in favor of Jean-Claude Van Damme's Guile.
Now, am I gonna sit here and say I didn't enjoy Guile in the film? Of course not - he gets some of the best lines in the film and has an absolutely-magnetic presence on-camera, and Van Damme does an excellent job with the material.
... However.
Guile has never mattered like Ryu has mattered in Street Fighter. Ryu is the one on the covers, front-and-center, and would it have killed the film to let the big Hollywood name actor take the role of a memorable side-character (à la Ben Kenobi) while a fresher face - in this case, Byron Mann - takes the lead? I don't think so!
Just look at the 1995 Mortal Kombat movie! I hear it did pretty good doing pretty much that!
Does every movie need to be the same, then? Obviously not, and Street Fighter: The Movie would inevitably have been very different if Ryu took on a more central role. Could it have been closer to the games? Perhaps. Would that have made it better? Were the writers on the film even equipped to write a good movie centered around Ryu?
All questions I will happily shrug in response to, because I wasn't there and I can't know about things that never happened.
That's just two examples of where the film made changes to the source material as it adapted it into a movie, anyway. One positive and one negative, at least as I've presented them so far. But, getting back to the grey, let's take another look at both.
Balrog's heroic turn is nice and all, but it's not automatically good on its own. Its execution is what truly makes it great. Conversely, while I dislike the principle of him being sidelined, Ryu is still a lovable character in the film - even as he and Ken are randomly con men.
This is all very basic stuff, I realize. "Thing isn't bad on its own, it can be good if it's good" isn't exactly setting the world on fire for philosophizing. It's good to talk about this stuff anyway, I think, since it can be so easy to forget the simple things sometimes.
As far as change goes, has something I like ever changed to be something I didn't like? Of course! Several times!
When people get bogged down in rigid binaries though, which I see happening often, it can be a pretty awful scene. Conservatism is founded on a resistance to change, flatly painting any change taking place as straying from a grand old path - or 'GOP,' if you dig acronyms... and enemies of basically everything good in the world.
When something changes, that can be an opportunity to take a look at what you liked about it before so you can figure out why you don't like it now. Did it change, or did you change? If it changed into something you don't like, does that make it worse or just different? All questions that can lead to a better understanding of what you love.
I don't ask that you love every change that comes your way, all I ask is that we not flatten the conversation. Real-life exists on more than two dimensions and, while 2D can be fun for video games, I like it better this way. :)
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YESSSSS THIS PASSSAGE THANK YOUUUUU
everyone say thank you to @bethanydelleman
AND THE ABSOLUTE CLAPBACK that Eleanor says right after!
“While, in fact,” cried his sister, “it ought only to be applied to you, without any commendation at all. You are more nice than wise. Come, Miss Morland, let us leave him to meditate over our faults in the utmost propriety of diction, while we praise Udolpho in whatever terms we like best. It is a most interesting work. You are fond of that kind of reading?"
Honestly though, this entire chapter is fire, and the next dialogue between Catherine and Eleanor (completely, might I add, not giving room for Henry to go on about word usage) about reading history books just tickles me, a lover of history.
“That is, I can read poetry and plays, and things of that sort, and do not dislike travels. But history, real solemn history, I cannot be interested in. Can you?” “Yes, I am fond of history.” “I wish I were too. I read it a little as a duty, but it tells me nothing that does not either vex or weary me. The quarrels of popes and kings, with wars or pestilences, in every page; the men all so good for nothing, and hardly any women at all—it is very tiresome: and yet I often think it odd that it should be so dull, for a great deal of it must be invention. The speeches that are put into the heroes’ mouths, their thoughts and designs—the chief of all this must be invention, and invention is what delights me in other books.”
Just. Go off, Miss Austen.
This is just as good as the passages where dudebro John Thorpe won't shut the fuck up about his Honda Civic carriage and incredibly patient horse.
maybe I'm hallucinating this or I read the passage too quickly, but one of my favorite Jane Austen passages of all time is in Northanger Abbey, where Eleanor Tilney, Henry Tilney, and Catherine Morland are having a nice walk. At some point, spurred on by Catherine calling something "nice" or "fine" or "neat" (not sure which,) Henry then goes on this rant grousing about Kids These Days Ruining the English Language, Especially Young Women, and when he's finished his rant, very proud of himself, both Eleanor and Catherine don't say anything and shoot him an absolutely incredulous look. Henry never brings the topic up again.
I love it, tell us how you *really* feel about dudes who mansplain language, Miss Austen, do go off.
...BRB gonna go digging into Northanger Abbey to make sure I'm not hallucinating this
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What happens when you hand YGO characters the AUX cord
idk what possessed me to make these but here ya go. Also I guess call me the 4kids of headcanons, I don't know a lot of music that isn't american-centric, so if you know some bands from other countries that could go with these please feel free to add them! <3
Yugi: I stand by the common headcanon that Yugi loves Heavy Metal. BUT this is also Yugi we're talking about, and he knows not everyone can handle the intensity of heavy metal, so often times he'll play more mild/main-stream metal or nu-metal. Something (or, rather, anything) by Linkin Park usually gets played. Three Day's Grace, Breaking Benjamin, Shine Down, NOTHING from your teen EMO phase is off the table for Yugi (plays Bring Me To Life because him and Anzu sing the "WAKE ME UP" parts perfectly together). ALSO!! I think Yugi would love Grunge music, plays Heart Shaped Box by Nirvana every. time. he's gets to control the music.
Atem: it took our pharaoh boi a long time to find his own taste in music. He does genuinely like a lot of Yugi's music but the more he listened to stuff on his own, the more he realizes that he just likes...vibe music. Ya know, music that just has a ~vibe~ like Telepatia by Kali Uchis or Electric Love by Borns (Jou jokes that it's good music to get stoned to). Also, anything Hozier makes instantly goes on his favorite songs. He's also kind of a sap for dramatic love songs. Actually, anything dramatic is up his alley so fully expect to hear some Adele or Conan Gray or Billie Eilish when you tell him to play something.
Anzu: has a wide taste in music but will exclusively play *hot girl* songs like WAP, Deepthroat, Thot Shit, and Bisexual Anthem when given the power of the playlist. Mostly does it because she loves seeing some of the boys get all squeamish hearing women belting about dirty shit. If begged she'll play other music, and in that case she'll play some Halsey, Rick Montgomery, MARINA, and so on. Yes, she does love her dance music (you can pry Lady Gaga and Black Pink from her cold dead hands!!) but she listens to so much of that while working that when she's hanging with the gang she usually goes for other types of music she likes.
Jonouchi: because of his delinquent days he listens to lots of rap music. Takayan, Eminem, and other "angry" rap dominate a big part of his playlists (but!! once he's able to embrace his nerd side he'd totally like nerd rap like JT music). He also likes K-pop tho, probably stans EXO. All in all he likes stuff with a hard beat, the kind of stuff you'd find in workout play list. Freaks by Timmy Trumpet, Turn Down for What and other Lil Jon stuff, even Harlem Shake. If you can punch bullies to it, he likes it! Anzu also gave him a deep appreciation for Nicki Minaj, dont fight me on this.
Honda: Mostly likes Rock music and all the ambiguous variety that label provides. Bon Jovi, Foo Fighters, and Killers are particular faves of his. Also fully expect him to play several Imagine Dragons songs, and 00's/10's songs like Hanging by a Moment by Lifehouse, Everything You Want by Vertical Horizon, It's Not Over by Daughtry, etc. Tends to play his "soft" rock songs to off-set Yugi's rough metal, Jou's angry rap, and Anzu's dirty girl songs. Honestly, Honda is usually in charge of the music because everyone can get behind his music, the only one who bitches is Otogi and it's just because he likes bullying Honda, not because he actually dislikes the music.
Speaking of!
Otogi: has shit taste in music. Sorry, it's canon I don't make the rules. No one ever lets him pick the music because he'll just play whatever song has it's sample trending on tiktok at the moment. And he'll play it on repeat. Does he do this just to troll everyone else? No one knows. You'd think the resident Casanova would make better music choices, but no.
Ryou: loves show tunes and will usually play go to his "Broadway hits" playlist to make things easy, but throws in Disney songs too. Every time he plays We Don't Talk About Bruno the gang breaks into song! Besides that, Ryou plays lots of Sleeping At Last and Sam Smith, kinda sad moody stuff ya know? Echo by Jason Walker, ok on your own by mxmtoon, Hello My Old Heart by the Oh Hellos, or Ghosting by Mother Mother usually makes an appearance. Anything with a mellow sound basically. He also(!!!) has lots of ambient/vocal-free music mixed in there, he knows a lot of that stuff from making background music for his RPG campaigns and, adjacent to those, found a genuine appreciation for lofi and synthwave! (like Atem, he appreciate a good ~vibe~)
#headcanons#yugioh#yugi muto#atem#anzu mazaki#katsuya jonouchi#hiroto honda#ryuji otogi#ryou bakura#idk these were nice to make tho#I only used songs that I personally know so I'd love to hear other people's music picks!!#ygo
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17 going on 27
summary; one second, you’re sobbing at prom because the most popular guy in school dumps you due to your relationship being a little prank to break your heart. the next? you’re a creative editor at Ego, the hottest young adult fashion magazine. as you try to figure out what’s the deal with this sudden time skip into adulthood, you come across relationships and friendships that are made to be cherished and made to be broken. pairing; photographer!jungkook x editor!reader (f) genre/warnings; fluff, crack, future enemies to lovers, teenage and adulthood angst, time skips from high school!au to late twenties!au, 13 going on 30!au, all your romantic movie tropes come to life! a really big mess honestly, various movie and music references, mentions of sex, use of alcohol, everyone give jin and jimin a big ol hug, language, a surprise guest from the queen of england w/c; 22.6k a/n; it’s that time of the year baby! the time of the year where i binge watch the good ol’ early 2000s romcoms that make absolutely no sense! a huge thank u to @eerieedits for making this beautiful banner. vivi got the whole delia’s/claire’s vibe down to a t!
if you enjoy this fic pls consider giving it a like and a share✨✨✨
March 19th, 2011
Thirty, flirty, and thriving!
You finger the dog-eared magazine, last month’s issue of a shoddy fashion magazine that featured top actress Jennifer Garner on the front cover. Her caramel brown highlights practically glow on the page, blown out and beautiful. You suppress a sigh, you long to be the radiant young woman on the cover. The headline is glittery, sparkly and just begging for attention.
Swiping a hand through the pages, your eyes are crowded with over-stimulation. Colorful models dressed up in the latest designs, Chanel and Burberry suits you can only dream of, and happy women at the prime of their lives.
Twenty-seven and in Heaven! You smile wryly at the cheesy rhyme that headlines the following pages, but nevertheless the happy model on the spread does indeed look like they’re in heaven.
Sure, you’re no shrinking violet. Heck, you don’t even consider yourself painfully average. You may not be on the traditional spectrum of popularity in high school, but you get around and have a wonderful best friend and an even better boyfriend. However given the social classes that preside, you do get those moments where you second guess your life’s position. Good thing high school has an expiration date, and you’re close to the end.
“Baby Bun, what are you doing?” the magazine is snatched from your grasp, thrown on the table without a care in the world. Jennifer Garner’s hydro-whitened smile gleams tauntingly at you, “reading that junk is gonna mess with your head.”
Your boyfriend returns from his final suit fitting, his outfit for tonight all pressed and ready to go. He pouts at you, pulling you up by the hand to lead you out of the Men’s Warehouse. Jeon Jungkook. Captain of the lacrosse team, flying by high school with a sports scholarship already in the bag. Eats up attention like plants soak up the sun. Secretly loves taking photographs of his dog and watching Netflix animes at your house.
“Aren’t you excited for prom?”
“Excited to listen to LMFAO’s Party Rock Anthem on repeat?” you guaff, “as if.”
He pinches your arm lightly, “You also forget that we’re gonna tear up the floor to Nicki Minaj’s Superbass.”
You shrug listlessly, crunching the white plastic closer to your body.
Before you can suck all the air out of the garment bag, Jungkook carefully extracts it from your grasp, easily holding it between his one arm so he can thread his other hand through yours. “I am excited! It’s just that… Jimin’s not gonna be there and we’re sitting with the Yearbook committee.”
Looking down at the floor you extract your hand from his, slipping into his parent’s Honda Civic. The yearbook committee, meaning you’d be sitting at a table with head editor Jennie and her group of friends. Friends that are popular and pretty, just like Jungkook.
Jimin is currently on a flight back from Korea due to a family funeral, therefore leaving a seat empty at your prom table. It was only seat that you cared about, other than Jungkook’s. It’s no one’s fault and Jimin of course is doubly upset to miss prom, but without your best friend you’re not sure if you can survive the night.
One of the few secrets you keep from Jungkook is the fact that Jennie and you aren’t exactly friendly to each other. You don’t know why, maybe it’s the fact that you don’t run the in same friend group or you always win the debate in Civics class, but Jennie clearly expresses her dislike for you as easily as she expresses her love for Jungkook.
Which makes you incredibly insecure, but Jennie and Jungkook have been friends for longer than you and him have been together, who are you to intervene?
Jungkook slips in the driver’s seat, but not before pressing a chaste kiss to your cheek.
Right. You’re Jungkook’s girlfriend, and that should matter more than his friendship with Jennie.
But the smell of his freshly cleaned lacrosse jersey, his duffle bag overflowing with protein powder and unfinished assignments remind you that you have your world and he has his. A conversation about your insecurities could wait until tomorrow.
“When’s Jimin’s flight?” Jungkook asks, one hand on the steering wheel and the other tapping on your thigh as he pulls out.
“He’ll be back two hours into the dance,” you report, albeit glumly as you rest your head against the cool window.
“That sucks,” Jungkook replies, a bit of sadness in his tone, “he has to miss out on his prom night.”
You shrug, “Prom isn’t everything, it’s about the people you spend it with.”
“Well then,” he squeezes your thigh, “I’m glad I get to spend it with you.”
You only have a few hours to get ready until you meet Jungkook at his house for pictures, so when you get dropped off, you tell him that he doesn’t have to get out of the car to escort you into your home. But Jungkook is insistent, putting the car in park and getting out your dress for you with such delicacy that you’re positively sure there’s no wrinkles in the fabric. Taking the dress from his grasp you wish him goodbye and a promise to meet each other later.
“Wait,” Jungkook is biting his lip, unable to let go of your hand even though you’re already up the stairs. You’re looking down at him, a rarity considering his tall frame.
“What’s wrong, Kook?”
“Uh, I was just thinking,” he’s scratching the back of his head, and you soften. The little quirk he has is a sign of insecurity, being the star player Jungkook is forced to exude confidence to a fault. “Maybe, we could skip the prom thing? You said so yourself that prom is about the people you spend it with.”
Your eyes widen, clutching your dress tighter. “What? Jungkook, that’s ridiculous. Between the both of us we’ve spent a lot of money on the clothes and the tickets.”
“Right,” he forces a laugh, and you put a hand on your hip to think it out but you can’t quite place what’s going on. “Sorry Bun, I just know how the finale of our favorite anime airs tonight.”
“You’re so silly,” you chastise, reaching down to pinch his cheek. Normally he hates it, but you can’t help but melt when he leans into your touch a little more. “C’mon, I know suits are stuffy and stuff, but let’s just do this high school rite of passage thing. Afterwards we can go to McDonalds or something and watch the recording.”
“You’re right,” his face is red, “what was I thinking? Can’t miss out on a night to see my beautiful girlfriend all dressed up.”
He squeezes your hand one last time, a little too tight for comfort. With a half smile he waves, going into his car and driving off.
You don’t have time to dwell on his weirdness (and trust when you say that Jungkook is plenty weird and it astounds you how the rest of your class has no idea) so you fly up to your room to get your hair and makeup ready. Your parents greet you excitedly along the way, telling you there’s a package left for you on your vanity.
It’s a plain cardboard box, already cut and unwrapped by your parents for convenience. The address shows it came from Korea, proudly displaying the name of your best friend on the return address. Inside is a beautiful compact, made of brushed gold and pink metal. The makeup inside is a loose glitter from a brand that you don’t recognize, but since it’s a gift from Jimin, you trust his taste.
I have to be at prom somehow, Jimin’s note on the box reads, don’t overthink and have fun!
You snort, reading the sticky note over and over in Jimin’s voice. Looking over the shade, you can’t help but grimace at the cliché name. Wishing Dust. The color is a little too white and silvery for your taste, but you’ll wear it in honor of Jimin.
The dress, the hair, the makeup all come together little by little. You like the ritual of getting ready, building yourself up to the highest order and feeling closer and closer to the beautiful women in magazines. Surprisingly, your favorite part of getting ready is applying the glitter that Jimin gifted you. The puff enclosed is cloud soft, and surprisingly the color doesn’t look too ashen on your skin. The glitter sinks into your skin like a soft butter, accentuating your collarbones and cheeks as if you are glowing from within.
You smile at yourself in the mirror. A little part of you wishes you could look like this everyday. You wish you could always look and feel this confident, and act mature and graceful.
A buzzing on your desk stops your wishful thinking, and you frown at the message that lights up your phone.
Jungkook: sorry bun, but the civic finally broke down and its on its way to car heaven. Could we meet at the party hall instead? We can take pictures there, jennie mentioned yearbook hired a photographer
Disheartened, you send a quick text back saying it’s fine. Any more explanation on your feelings would reveal your disappointment. You don’t know how you’re going to tell your parents that they won’t be taking pictures with your boyfriend anytime soon. So you suck it in and take solo pictures for your parents and some group selfies. This is just one bump in the night, the rest of it should be smooth sailing.
But when your parents drop you off at the venue your eyes first land on a beat up Honda Civic. You’re pretty sure car heaven isn’t at the prom.
The rest of your entrance is a blur as you go through every corner of the venue, searching for your boyfriend. You’re clutching his matching flower in your hand, a beautiful red rose with baby’s breath circling around it, all clutched together in a black silk ribbon. You wonder what kind of flower he bought you.
But it’s nearly impossible to find him. Not at the photobooth, the appetizer buffet, or in the lobby. It’s not until you’re sweating at the brow and nearing the corner of the venue that you do find him.
Lips locked, kissing Jennie.
The plastic encasing Jungkook’s boutonniere drops, clanging to the ground.
Whispers of you circle the air, meeting your ears and confirming all your insecurities.
“Oh my god, I knew Jungkook was cheating on her!”
“Wow, how pathetic. She ran all the way to prom alone to see this?”
“I thought his girlfriend was a smart girl. How did she not know that their relationship was a bet all along?”
Jungkook and Jennie are on the balcony, looking picture perfect in matching formal attire and flowers. The sun is setting, not taking its time as it sinks deeper and deeper into the horizon. The sky darkens and the air is chilly, much like your heart.
Jungkook's eyes are wide and in shock as he watches you from the balcony, but Jennie’s are sharp and satisfied. Satisfied, as if the whole thing had been orchestrated.
While you can’t hear him because he’s so far away, you can see the ghost of your name on his lips. Your ears are ringing, numb to the laughter of the students watching and the pity that others are throwing at you. You feel dumb. You feel like throwing up. In a bout of anger your heel digs into the plastic of the boutonniere, crushing the innocent rose in its clear coffin.
You don’t make it far out the door when one of your favorite teachers snatches you in concern.
“Honey, any further and you’ll be running on the highway," Mrs. Song jokes, pulling you away from the entrance.
You feel like a newborn deer in your heels and incredibly heavy in your dress as Mrs. Song drags you over to a staff bathroom. It's far, far away from the actual party. Mrs. Song doesn't say anything, and just gives you a sad smile as she let's you go into the single stall alone.
Sitting on the toilet and not giving a care that your dress is probably getting soiled, you bury your face in your hands and finally let the tears flow. Fat, frustrated tears roll down your cheeks without a care in the world.
"Mrs. Song please, I need to get in there."
"Now Jungkook, I think you've done enough for today. Go back to the party and don't worry about it."
You can imagine Jungkook now, he hated it when people told him not to worry. It only made him more annoyed, fists probably clenched under his perfectly tailored suit and his cute teeth uncharacteristically gritted. He cared to a fault, at least you thought he did. He ruined your night, he made you feel so dumb and silly.
But the longer you stayed in the dim bathroom, you could care less. Thank goodness for Mrs. Song guarding the door. Why would he bother to follow you? It turns out all your insecurities are not in vain, and that you’ve been ignoring a gut feeling you’ve mistaken for your lack of trust. You shouldn’t have trusted Jungkook. You shouldn’t have been so tolerable of Jennie.
Goodness, you feel so stupid. You hope that there are other bathrooms for staff to use, because you want to coop yourself in here until the last dance. Mascara drips on your sleeves, your hands swiping at your cheeks to stop any tears from staining your dress even further.
The more you hear Jungkook and Mrs. Song argue, the more you want to disappear. You bury yourself on the floor, uncaring of how dirty the tiles are. Glitter smears across your cheeks and sticks to your hands, and you no longer feel like the thriving young adult you once felt when you walked out the door this evening.
All you can do is cry and pray you can get through the night. And the next day, and the rest of senior year. You don’t want to see Jungkook or Jennie until graduation, when they walk out of the door and permanently out of your life. You wish you could skip the rest of the semester, and fastforward to the life you’ve carved for yourself in your dreams since freshman year. You wish you could be like the woman on the magazine, who has her whole life put together. To be a woman who holds all the confidence in the world and doesn’t have to worry about stupid men.
Just like the cover. Thirty, flirty and thriving. Just like the models in the magazines. Twenty-seven and in heaven.
Just once, do you want to taste the feeling of having life on your side.
March 20st, 2021
Your first thought is that you feel disgusting.
Of course, falling asleep in a random bathroom stall will make you feel those things. Your dress clinging uncomfortably to your sweating form, lulled to the sounds of Mrs. Song’s temperamental voice and Jungkook’s arguing.
But for some reason it’s a different kind of disgusting. The feeling is rotting in your throat, as if there’s a tang stuck to the roof of your mouth. You also feel impossibly dehydrated, as if you’ve run a marathon. And for some reason you’re sore? Especially in the crotch, and you don’t remember experiencing any cramps yesterday.
Your hands come to your body, and instead of feeling tulle and taffeta your hands are greeted with a silky black negligee that hangs across your waist. Panic stings in your bones like a stroke of lightning.
Eyes snapping open, your breath catches in your throat when you take in the room. You’re on a large plush creme couch, large enough to be a bed. The organza curtains are a shade of bottle green and are opened slightly to let the morning sun in. From your view it seems like this is the top floor of the complex, overlooking the city horizon.
You feel the covers shift slightly, and you realize there’s a naked man sleeping next to you. You scream.
The man screams back with an even higher pitch, falling off the couch and clutching the sheets like a lifeline. “What?” he panics, eyes darting back and forth across the room like he’s on a reality television show. “What the fuck? Is there something on my face! Why are you screaming so early!”
The fact that he’s an adult man and you’re seventeen is even more terrifying, and you feel absolutely naked despite the fact that you’re nearly clothed. But what confuses you more is that this man looks awfully familiar.
Familiar in the sense that you’ve seen him in one too many television sitcoms to count. This man in front of you looks like Kim Seokjin, the protagonist of your favorite television show: Sky City. He has the same plump lips and pretty face, only aged up. But last time you checked on Soompi, Seokjin is supposed to be twenty years old and filming the next season in New Zealand. Arguably he could be his older brother, but he never acted and you don’t think he’d be the spitting image.
“Seokjin?” you taste the name on your tongue, “Kim Seokjin?”
Seokjin relaxes considerably, and he finds it appropriate to return to the couch, placing a tentative hand on your thigh. “Right, were you really that drunk? You got my name right, but it seems that you’ve forgotten that the only name you called me last night was sex god…”
His plush lips meet the ends of your earlobe, and you squeal at the strange sensation.
You’ve had sex with this man and you can’t even remember it? Furthermore how can a peasant like you be in contact with a celebrity? What on earth happened last night? Shouldn’t you be calling the police or panicking more? Where’s the pepper spray and sharp knives where you need them? You can’t even find it in you to find a sharp weapon at your once cherished-idol, who’s apparently unfazed and drinking in your body like he has a taste of it every night.
“What’s the date?” you push him away, looking around for any signs of where you are and how you ended up here.
“It’s the first day of spring,” Seokjin says easily, stretching out on the couch. “I wonder when the cherry blossoms will bloom. Should we have a picnic with Bogum?”
“Where’s my phone, I can’t find my phone!”
Seokjin doesn’t bat an eye as he digs through the couch, pulling something from under him. He waves it in front of your face. “That’s not my phone,” you deadpan.
“Okay I guess you were actually that drunk,” Seokjin rolls his eyes, forcing the large piece of plastic and metal on your palm. “When you went to the bathroom last night you dropped your old phone in the toilet. We picked up a new one on the way to the next bar. Good thing the new Samsung dropped last month!”
Since when are phones this large? You carry the strange weight in your hands, confused as to why Seokjin thinks this is your phone. You own a beat up 2G that barely gets any reception in the school basement. But when you turn it on, the screen recognizes your face immediately and unlocks. Wow, since when do cell phones do face recognition?
A selfie of you and Seokjin appears on the homescreen, looking totally happy.
Is that you?
No longer do you have acne lining your brows, or uneven skin texture. Your smile is high and prominent. Your visage is clean and done with minimal makeup, highlighting your beauty.
The date flickers on the top of the screen. March 20th, 2021: 7:42AM.
You scream again. Seokjin screams again for the heck of it.
“How did this happen!” you shriek, dropping your phone to step up to the window. You bask in your reflection, mildly impressed and even more so afraid of what’s in front of you. Your body has filled out like an adult, and considering it’s ten years into the future, other things have filled out as well. Experimentally, your hands go out to your chest, squeezing. Yep, those knockers were not there the last time you checked.
“Well, you came back from work completely drained from a shoot and I just finished filming my Everyday Skincare Routine video with Vogue,” Seokjin comes up to you, blanket tied around his waist like a long towel. “We met at our usual bar and do what we usually do when we’re both stressed: bang it out.”
You watch as Seokjin’s hands snake around your slick silk, hugging you from behind like it’s second nature. “Is this a dream?” you ask yourself, because it’s not unlikely that you’ve had a sex dream with Seokjin and this is the aftermath dream.
“Nope,” you yelp when Seokjin pinches your butt, hard. It stings. “This is real life, baby.”
“Are we dating?”
You feel Seokjin’s grip tense, and he shoves your innocent question away with a coarse laugh. “You know both you and me don’t do serious relationships. It’s why we work so well together, you know that.”
“Right,” you reply softly. That doesn’t sound like you at all, and it scares you considerably.
“So, I gotta go,” you panic when he lets go and starts searching around for his clothes. Your face heats up at Seokjin’s perky ass staring back at you, and your eyes dart to a random spot in the corner. “I got a green meeting with Ellen, and lord knows I don’t wanna face her wrath if I’m late.”
In seconds he’s fully clothed in a plain shirt and jeans, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Call me beep me, if you wanna reach me,” he sings, throwing a wave over his shoulder as he leaves you in the large apartment.
The door slams with a hard smack and that’s when you collapse on the couch that feels foreign and strange, breaking into tears.
The next time you wake up, it’s the next day. It’s a glaringly bright Sunday and for whatever reason you’re still in this aged-up body. Maybe time travel makes the body really tired. This isn’t a dream. You panic for the second time, walking back and forth around the loft that’s apparently yours. It seems like it’s yours, because the bills that linger on the coffee table have your name and the pictures in the one bedroom are of you and your family.
But the refrigerator in the nook is digital and has fancy ice settings, something you could never imagine owning. Your closet is filled with brand named suits, and with every designer label you pass you mentally rack up the total of just one section. It’s enough to pay for your college tuition if your first choice accepts you.
Wait. You’re apparently twenty-seven, college is long gone.
Lying in your bed feels better, surrounded by familiar pictures of your cousins and family. Your favorite snacks are tucked with care in your nightstand, and it makes you feel a tiny bit better knowing that your favorite chocolate and chips will never change.
What happened in the past ten years? Why don’t you remember anything and are you entirely sure this isn’t some strange fever dream?
Time ticks slowly as you spend the afternoon, glued to your phone. It’s a 25 Note+ and it’s filled with multiple doohickeys and settings that make you feel technologically inept. You never thought you were bad with technology, but clearly these phones have a learning curve attached to them.
You try to call your family, but according to the voicemail left they’re on a Disney cruise that you paid for. Your heart aches at the excited voice of your parents. Why are they on a vacation without you?
The next thing you aim for is finding Jimin’s contact. According to Google Maps, you’re not far from your hometown and you know that Jimin’s always wanted to move to the city so he must be nearby. To your chagrin, his name isn’t on your contact list. Strange, he’s always number two on speed dial.
Clicking on the internet browser, you go to the online Whitepages and search up Park Jimin. There may be a million ones, but maybe you could get a lead. When a picture and an address show up easily with one swipe, you scoff. The internet has no room for privacy ten years later, huh?
The most casual thing you own in your closet is a Free People dress, reaching mid-calf with flowing bell sleeves. Heck, you couldn’t even find a single pair of jeans. You don’t care however, as you swipe your keys from the counter (you gape, you own a Tesla?) and race down to the parking garage.
Jimin’s apartment is on the other side of the city. It’s strange, transitioning from high rises and shiny windows to quaint brick walls and lived-in patio spaces. You feel like it’s a race against time as you make it all the way to his room, knocking feverishly on the mahogany red door.
“What? Who is it?” it’s clear that his room is cheap, the walls thin as you hear his voice shuffle throughout the room. Why are you shaking? It’s just your best friend.
The door swings open and you and Jimin drink each other in. His baby fat has melted from his cheeks, revealing a handsome and charming jawline. His hair is no longer a natural black, but has been dyed to a sandy blond that suits his tan. His eyes, wide in surprise, are still a soft brown but not as bright as when he was seventeen.
“Jimin,” your third round of tears hits you like a truck at the sight of your best friend, and you immediately run into his arms.
But he doesn’t hug you back immediately. In fact, he doesn’t know what to do at all. Your name rolls off his lips like he’s seen a ghost.
You pull away, as if you are burned. You flinch at the way Jimin regards you. “Is something wrong?”
“I don’t know,” he looks at you, crossing his arms, “I don’t know what to feel when your old best friend suddenly shows up at your doorstep after ten years.”
What?
“Why would I do that?” you whisper, bracing your hand against the doorframe to steady yourself.
“Well, after graduation you chose a college at the last minute. Decided to go to a prestigious fashion university in Europe. Shacked it up with some British guys and well, forgot about your past but I guess I can’t blame you.”
“But I couldn’t have left you,” you know you’re not even talking to Jimin, but in fact scolding yourself for being so stupid these past ten years. “I was crying for you that night at prom. All I wanted was for you to be there and hold me!”
That strikes a cord. Jimin pops his head into the hallway, looking back and forth to see if anyone is watching. He sighs when your tears turn into sobs, shaking your form. “Come in,” he mutters, ushering you inside.
Jimin’s apartment feels more like home than your apartment does. Cosy and warm with the scent of jasmine brewing on the stove. The pour of tea soothes you slightly as you relax on the worn leather couch.
Jimin hands you a mug, sitting opposite you against the rickety living room table. “Are you okay?” he asks, showing genuine concern for the first time.
“I’m,” you roll the muddy liquid in your grasp, watching the tea leaves tumble. “I just came back from the hospital, actually. Hit my head drinking last night and I’m suffering from memory loss,” you clutch your head for good measure, feigning injury.
“Memory loss?” he gapes, unable to see through your lie.
“Yeah uh,” you wince, “almost ten years of memory loss.”
Jimin isn’t a man who thinks ahead, preferring to live in the moment. You figure he’s not going to question your excuse. Your former best friend nearly drops his tea in the process, hot drops burning his hand. He hisses, placing the plain mug on the table as he goes to his shelves, pulling out your class yearbook.
“Ten years,” he shakes his head, looking like he’s just stepped into a Korean drama. “Is that even possible?”
“Must be,” you sigh, not wanting to delve into the details of how you ended up in the future, “the first thing I did when I woke up was scream my head off. Then I woke up later and the first person I called were my parents who didn’t pick up, and then I wanted to call you but,” you squeeze the cup in your hands, “I couldn’t find your contact so I searched you up.”
“Should we call the hospital or something? Maybe you shouldn’t be walking around like this.”
“Don’t worry, they said the memory loss is only temporary,” you force a smile, knocking your head lightly with the heel of your palm, “I just gotta y’know, catch up a little bit. I thought you could help.”
Jimin is patient, albeit a little nervous, watching carefully as your eyes glaze emptily over the old yearbook. You’re unfazed at the familiar faces and events that are described to you in detail, unable to recall what happened during the events that followed graduation. There’s barely any pictures of you, so it doesn’t help when he tries to explain as much as he can.
You stop him at the sports section, pointing a finger at Jungkook being carried by his fellow teammates during the lacrosse championships. “What happened to Jungkook?”
Jimin shrugged, “Blew his sports scholarship,” your eyebrows float to the top of your forehead, appalled that your former love would do such a thing, “decided to pursue his passion and went to an art school for a degree in photography.”
So much has changed in the past ten years.
“Hey, can you please stop crying?”
“I’m sorry,” you warble, wiping at your sleeve as if the fabric didn’t cost hundreds of dollars, “I must be making you so uncomfortable by barging in. I’ll get out of your life—”
“No, not that. I just don’t like seeing you cry,” Jimin sighs, squeezing your knee, “of course I was upset when you suddenly upped and left town to study in another continent. But I was still happy for you. On the internet you seemed tons happier since highschool.”
“I can say that’s no longer the case,” you mutter sadly, taking a long drag of your tea. The burn flows down your throat, digging you to reality, “I guess I just woke up and wasn’t prepared to be the person I ended up being.”
“Well, what can your former best friend do to make it better?”
Your eyes widen at Jimin’s uneasy stare, as if he’s wondering whether he said the right thing or not.
“Um,” you bite your lip, “will you go shopping with me? I realized I don’t own any sweatpants or sneakers and I would really like to wear something comfortable right now,” you look despondently on your uncomfortable dress, swinging around the sleeves that seem to snag onto everything.
“Okay,” he nods easily, “will you also buy me new sweatpants and sneakers? And dinner? I really want a New York Strip.”
“What?” you furrow your brows, “can I afford that?”
He chuckles to himself, pulling you up and wiping the tears on your face with a tissue from his pocket. You don’t even care to ask whether the tissue is clean, only focusing on the tender gesture that you’ve missed so much.
“Honey, you’re one of the co-editors of Ego. I’m sure a couple pairs of sweatpants and steak will barely make a dent in your bank account.”
You’re flabbergasted. Ego? The fashion magazine that’s on billboards and commercials? That Ego?
After a couple checks through your bank account, and a triple check with a phone call and trip to the ATM, you’re sure the money is yours. It scares you, but also comforts you knowing that you’ve always been able to make it big.
You barely bat an eye as Jimin tugs you around the city with a familiarity that has you reeling. You struggle to remember the streets you pass and the signs that indicate what part of town you’re in, all whilst Jimin basks in the fruits of your labor. You don’t give a shit, obviously. It makes you happy seeing Jimin slowly melt and grow more comfortable throughout the day.
This is the kind of life you envisioned. One where comfort isn’t discarded for luxury, where the two cultures can marry. Jimin busts a gut when he sees you angrily shove your Free People dress deep in your shopping bags in favor of a black Adidas tracksuit that makes you feel like a soccer mom. Of course, he doesn’t know why you’re so aggressive with all your luxurious items, heck you even make him drive your Tesla, but nevertheless each passing hour brightens you up considerably.
When you two arrive at a fancy steakhouse with a dress code, the manager doesn’t hesitate to chide you and suggest the Applebee’s down the street.
You retort back that you’re an editor of Ego, and in seconds you’d have this restaurant swarmed with bad reviews. You know nothing about culinary review but you’re sure the manager doesn’t know that, and no arguments are placed after that.
The evening puts you in higher spirits, and you’re almost convinced that you’re a successful twenty-something catching up with your former best friend. You’ve always been mature for your age, high school can do that to a person, and it makes it vastly easier to keep up with the new decade.
“So,” you help Jimin get his bags up into his apartment. A little part of it feels like a bribe as you carry all the name brands on your arms, but you chalk it up to being compensation for the last ten years, “who are the people you hang out with now? Anyone I know?”
“Well, Taehyung sometimes drops by if he’s free. He’s traveling the world now, he actually works with you,” Jimin provides the information smoothly, “only he works in the international business column. But surprisingly, the person I hang out the most with is—”
“Jungkook.”
Standing face-to-face with your old high school sweetheart disarms you, and you’re sorely reminded that just you’re a seventeen-year-old in a twenty-seven-year-old’s body.
Jungkook looks tired, and he rubs his eyes a bit as if to make sure he isn’t dreaming. You in the flesh, looking purposeful and confident as you hold three bags on each arm, each piece probably costing more than his rent. He’s filled out, what once was lean muscle and minor definition has turned into full muscle mass hidden beneath a large t-shirt and sweatpants that are two sizes too big. His face is still sweet-looking and baby-like, but his hair is overgrown and waving in front of his eyes without a care in the world.
“Did I mention we’re neighbors?” you can practically hear the wince in Jimin’s voice, probably regretting that he hid that chunk of information from you.
Jungkook tastes his name on your lips, and it sounds foriegn and strange coming from the both of you. “Good to see you,” he says, voice low.
You barely formulate a response, replying with an equally nervous “right back at ya” and then you two resume staring at each other. While Jungkook hasn’t seen you in the last ten years, you saw him yesterday. Yesterday, where you started the day all peachy keen and it spiraled downhill shortly after. It’s jarring, knowing that your body doesn’t fit your conscience.
“Well I uh,” Jungkook lifts his indicator to leave, a large garbage bag, “bye.”
Jungkook shuffles out of the small hallway, and you get a whiff of his scent. It’s still the same, fabric softener mixed with his own musk.
“I,” you start off slow, “maybe I should go talk to him?”
“No,” he warns. “You and Jungkook are completely different people now, he’s just gonna think you’re pitying him if you go up and talk to him out of the blue.”
“But we’ve always been different people.”
“You really think that?” Jimin shakes his head, “I know what happened at prom was rough but, I really didn’t think much of your relationship with Jungkook before that. It seemed like you were pretty compatible—”
“Up until the point he was kissing Jennie in matching flowers on the balcony like some kind of romance film?” you scoff, crossing your arms, “right. Super compatible.”
Jimin sighs, as if he’s chastising a teenager. “Prom happened ten years ago, don’t act like it happened yesterday. People change.”
You frown, because in your mind it did happen yesterday.
Sleeping last night was hell. It’s one thing to be completely zonked out of your mind and unsure if you’re in a dream or weird coma, but knowing that you’re going to be stuck here for awhile is painful. Your loft is too big for your tiny body, your mattress cold and empty with just you in it. Without your parents to call and you feeling wholly insecure about your rekindling with Jimin, the only person you can really call is… Seokjin.
And you really don’t want a repeat of your first night.
So you suck it up, spend your waking hours in your office and quickly learning your tasks for work. You don’t even know what time you’re supposed to clock in, but from a sticky note attached to your MacBook it seems that you have a creative meeting at 10AM. You allow yourself two hours of sleep before you get moving.
The one exciting thing about your morning is that your outfit choices are virtually limitless. You feel like Cher in Clueless, all your outfits color-coordinated and organized by season. You pick out a springy Chanel number, a pale pink tweed skirt suit that has you feeling equally parts cute and an independent working woman. You even make time to buy yourself a coffee, because that’s what adults do right?
Your office is gorgeous. Also located in the upper part of the city, the glass desk and high windows fit right in. You have an ideas board filled with various designs, fabrics and models to choose from. There’s a little frilly notebook straight out of the 2000s, all filled with phone numbers and special contacts all at your disposal. You even have your own cold press coffee machine complete with a mini-fridge.
“You’re never this early, nervous for the meeting?”
You squeal, nearly dropping your coffee as you take a tour around your office. You fight the urge to gape and point accusingly at the woman standing at your door.
“Jennie?”
“In the flesh,” she gives you a cool smirk, holding her arms out for a hug. It really throws you for a loop, and you’re left stricken in your spot as Jennie closes the gap and squeezes the life out of you. Her grey pinstripe pantsuit crumples against your softer fabric. “You know you can’t get rid of me that easily.”
“Jennie and you are practically besties,” Jimin sounds a little jealous while saying that, forcing you to scroll through your Instagram page to see the countless selfies of you and your high school rival, “I mean, at least that’s what the internet says. Went to college in Europe together and everything.”
So it’s true. You awkwardly pat Jennie on the back, and she doesn’t seem to mind when she pulls away and tells you to meet upstairs. You mindlessly follow after her to the conference room, wishing a kind good morning to everyone that greets you.
Once you make it upstairs, you flinch at the loud screech of your voice. “My favorite editor!” someone in a plaid red suit runs up to you and throws an arm around your shoulders. The editor-in-chief Jung Hoseok smiles brightly at you, leading you to a seat at the head of the table right next to him. You’re cosy with the editor-in-chief? This is crazy!
“G-good morning Mr. Jung,” you stutter, trying to remain cool.
“Did something happen to you this weekend?” Hoseok jests, pinching your cheek like a long lost sister. “You always call me Hobi.”
“Oh,” you force a giggle, “you don’t even know how crazy this weekend was.”
Hoseok simply laughs and gets himself settled for the meeting.
“I’m so jealous,” Jennie sing-songs, a manicured finger trailing over the back of your chair, “only the best of the best can sit next to the big boss.”
The comment has you bristling. Are you really friends? Giving her a tight smile, she saunters to another corner of the meeting. On your section of the table is your itinerary and iPad, ready for note-taking.
“One thing that we do at Ego is consistency,” Hoseok pulls up a projection of this year’s editions, all carbon copies of the same cover. “And while that is admirable, I want to put my top editors to the test and come up with the theme for next month’s issue.”
Hoseok sends you yet another pearly white smile, and due to the sheer closeness you know that secret smile is only reserved for you. That makes you squirm in your seat, already feeling the pressure building in the pit of your stomach.
“Take two days off this week to plan. Work out the days you’ll be out of the office with HR, those days you’ll be working in the city, finding ideas and inspiration for the issue. Remember, think outside the box!” Hoseok does a little fist pump, cutting through the air like his life depends on it.
The whole lot of the group continues to stare at Hoseok, waiting for his next instructions. Then, the adults begin to panic, similar to a high school class that’s been told they have a pop quiz that’s worth half their grade. You sigh internally, you suppose high school never ends.
“C’mon,” Hoseok urges, flailing his arms around, “get out there! Make moves, make money!”
But the only moves you’ve made since 2PM are fleeting trips to the bathroom.
Obviously you don’t have any memory of your degree or experience, so instead of feeling like an editor you feel more like a teenager playing dress-up. You couldn’t even sneakily ask Jennie for help because she deadpanned: “I’m not sharing any secrets, doll.” It seems that being backhandedly mean is a theme in your relationship, so after that you rolled your eyes and locked your door. Thankfully you packed a pair of sweatpants so you can comfortably lie down on the floor while you spread out your workspace. Magazines littered the hardwood, all sultry and sexy looking models staring back at you with the same half-lidded stare and overdone makeup.
It makes you cringe, thinking back to the other day when you were jealous of these people. Now that you have this life, thriving and full of beauty, is that the only thing you want to show to your audience? How can they possibly relate to models who make triple their salary? What about the authenticity? The ingenuity?
And that’s when it hits you.
Scrambling to your computer, you search up a photographer that you know will be completely and utterly transparent.
My Time Studios: Capturing the raw moment.
You know exactly what you want for next month’s issue.
Jungkook does not expect to see you through the peephole of his apartment, fiddling with the threads of your clothes and eyes glued to the ground. He mutters a curse under his breath, jamming his fingers between the metal double lock to swing his head out. He doesn’t even bother to open up all the way, just enough to stick his face out.
“Jungkook, hi!” he still can’t believe you’re around. Jungkook winces at your tone, high and sounding like a teenager. He thought by now you’d be traveling the world, climbing to bigger and better things. Then again, the upper part of the city is certainly an upgrade. He just thought you’d want to be far, far away from him. “I b-brought you McDonalds.”
You hold up a greasy bag of fast food, and his nose immediately responds to the smell of fresh fries and a quarter pounder (with cheese, of course.) It annoys him that you still know his weakness, but he isn’t going to go that easily.
“Why are you here?” he asks a little too sharply, hands gripping the doorknob.
“I wanted to offer you a job,” you get straight to the point, as if you know your time at his doorstep is limited.
He scoffs, “You? Want to put my photos on Ego? You know my business extends to weddings and the occasional Bar Mitzvah. Why would you want me?”
You frown, crossing your arms. He looks down at your attire, a nicely fitted suit on top, but the skirt is replaced with grey sweatpants. Comical, really. “I’ve always loved your photos,” you admit to him, “you know that. And they’ve gotten so much better since then.”
The furrow between Jungkook’s brows softens a fraction, smoothed by the honesty in your voice. You’re right, you always made sure to tell Jungkook how much you loved his other talents. Namely, the photography, and sometimes his singing. He can still remember how easily you slept in his arms watching Sky City for hours, all at the melody of your favorite song. While his teachers and classmates loved to venerate his position on the team and his ability to garner attention, you encouraged him to work on the things that mattered to him the most, even in secret.
Nevertheless, that was ten years ago.
“I don’t need your charity,” he spits, “Jimin might be able to be bought by some designer clothes and an eighty dollar steak, but not me.”
The pain in your gaze is glaringly evident, and you don’t even try to hide that you’re upset as the paper bag falls against your lap. If there’s one thing Jungkook knows he’s good at, is hurting your feelings.
“You think this is charity?” you whisper, hurt delicately lacing your voice.
“Are you kidding? Last month you got Xu Minghao to photograph your spread for Ego. He’s photographed the damn Queen of England,” if you notice that he’s babbling about reading your magazine, you don’t show it in your face, “the point is, I don’t understand why you’re trying to come into my life again. I don’t want to get involved in your fancy dinner galas or anyone else from high school. So please, just go back to your picture perfect life.”
And without another qualm he slams the door in your face, effectively shutting you out. It doesn’t feel as good as he wants it to feel, clearly. He feels even shitter than before. His eyes glaze over to his rickety coffee table, cluttered with bills and credit card payments that should’ve been dealt with a long time ago.
He slugs himself over to his couch, throwing his body over the couch that’s way too short. His legs dangle in mid-air, but it doesn’t stop him from throwing an arm over his eyes to block out the sunset. The bills can wait a little longer. Seeing you was too draining.
The nap turns into a full-fledged night’s sleep, and by the time he wakes up the sky is dark and it’s the start of a new day. 12:08, the screen of his iPhone confirms. Feeling even crustier and worse than before, his stomach decides to harden the blow and go straight for the gut. He’s sorely reminded of the food you offered him hours ago.
Quickly pulling on a large denim jacket, he grabs his keys and heads for the 7-Eleven down the park. Nothing like a frozen pizza to fill the gut, fast and cheap. Despite the fact that it’s dark and late, there're still some stray people in the park. A few homeless, some high school stoners who are meeting in secret, and you are typing away on your MacBook.
Wait, what?
You’re sitting on a bench in the park, typing away without a care in the world. Shoving soggy fries that he earlier refused in your mouth, you let a couple stray potatoes hang from your lips as your eyes succumb to the screen. You look positively silly, still in a pink blazer and baggy sweatpants.
He must have been staring a little too long, because soon enough you turn your head, gasping at his figure. You quickly avert your eyes, but don’t make any move to leave the park. That interests him further.
Shamelessly, he calls your name. His legs get to you in an instant, towering over your tiny figure.
“What are you doing here?”
“Uh, I’m waiting for Jimin,” your eyes flicker to your open laptop, “and working.”
At least one of those reasons is a lie. Last time he checked, Jimin always sleeps over at Yoongi’s house on this day. He knows it’s a lie, and you know he knows it’s a lie, but neither of you make the effort to correct it.
“And what could you possibly be working on at 12AM?”
“Finding a photographer,” you hunch over your laptop, avoiding eye contact. “I don’t have much time and none of my usual contacts are good enough. This project is… personal.”
It makes him want to ask further, he can’t lie and say he isn’t intrigued in the kind of vision you’re going for in your next issue. “But why can’t you work at home?”
“Don’t wanna go,” you reply casually, “it makes me feel lonely.”
Lonely? You feel lonely? He runs a hand through his hair, frustrated at the display of nonchalance. Back in high school he always encouraged you to feel confident, but not like this. “Hey, it’s nice that you feel comfortable enough to chill in the park at 12AM, but it’s really dumb. You’re lucky you haven’t gotten mugged from all that money you’re carrying around!” he gestures to your fancy clothes and laptop, “and if you feel so lonely, call up one of your rich friends I’m sure they’ll—”
“Oh my god, Jungkook,” you slam your laptop shut, darkening the two of you. “I thought you wanted me to go back to my ‘picture perfect life’, so why do you care?” you get up in his face, standing on the bench so you’re nearly eye-to-eye, “why don’t you pester those kids over there? Tell them to drink their milk and go home,” you scoff, shoving your stuff in your bag. You don’t spare him another glance as you stalk off in the other direction.
He groans, unable to untangle himself from the mess, “Where are you going?”
“To a park where you’re not in!”
Despite the exchange for sweatpants, you’re still wearing shoes not fit for walking. They’re little white pumps, not too tall but not remarkably comfy either. However, that doesn’t deter you from getting the heck out of there, seemingly walking in any possible direction to get away from Jungkook.
“You’re being ridiculous,” he chastises once his hand clasps around your hand, pulling you around.
There’s a little resistance, as you try to hide your face to no avail. Jungkook fumbles a little, not thinking you’d be crying. But tiny, shy tears are pooling around your eyes, looking flustered at your display of emotion.
“God,” you mutter to yourself, “I feel like such a kid.”
That strikes a chord in the twenty-something man. The last time he saw you in the flesh was when you were both kids. Young, unbridled, and stupid. Well, only Jungkook was the stupid one.
“Do you want me to take you home?” Jungkook offers, feeling guilty about his roughness.
You shake your head. “No, I told you I don’t want to.”
“Can I at least call you a cab? Or a friend so you won’t get lonely?”
“Jungkook, if I had that option would you think I’d be here right now?” he’s trying, he really is. But you’re equally as miffed about this whole situation and at a loss. The two of you engage in a staring contest. It only takes a few seconds for you to crumble, and he frowns when you shiver in your thin blazer.
Instantly, he rips off his jacket, pulling it over your body. It’s huge on you, swallowing your body and hopefully containing some of his residual heat.
And finally, he relents. “If you want, I’ll come over and stay until you fall asleep.”
“Okay,” your eyes widen in instant agreement, pulling something out of your pocket. “Will you drive?”
His eyes widen at the shiny, minimalistic car key. Your sudden one-eighty has him second guessing his decision. “You drive a Tesla?” he gapes, taking your key like he’s holding the Hope Diamond.
You got your license in February. One month ago, and only because the instructor felt pity on you since it was your second time retaking it. The fancy car terrifies you, and you’re sure Jungkook has much more experience driving (over ten years worth.)
You shrug, “Not very good at driving. Haven’t had much practice.”
“Um, the car drives itself?”
“It does?” you tilt your head, dazed, “wow, technology is amazing.”
He shakes his head, putting a hand on your back so you can lead the way. You must be tired, because it seems like your head isn’t entirely there anymore. He takes charge, buckles you in and takes a couple minutes to fumble with the car settings. Nevertheless the drive home is smooth (and it takes all of Jungkook’s willpower to not squeal in excitement when the Tesla does in fact, drive itself.)
You lead him inside your loft like a tiny zombie, throwing your shoes to one corner and throwing your jacket on the kitchen table.
“Must be hungry,” you can’t even form complete sentences, “there’s food in the fridge, Kook. Sorry if it’s not to your taste.”
Shuffling away to your room, Jungkook is left to gawk at your apartment. The baseboards of your walls are crusted in pretty pearl designs, swirling around the whole expanse. There’s a television that stretches the wall of the little living room, with a sound and video game system he’s only seen in movies. Your tables are meters and meters of granite, and he wonders how the floor of your apartment can hold all this weight.
But he supposes it’s because there’s nothing much to hold. No pictures line the walls, only vague looking art to fill up blank space. There’s no touch of warmth despite the heating system under the floor that relaxes his toes. For such a big home, he can only imagine how small you must feel in it.
Your fridge is just as empty, decorated with a couple of sad-looking salads and some protein shakes. He sighs, grabbing two chicken salads and a banana shake and bringing it to your coffee table. It’s a little two quiet for his liking, so he turns on the television real low just to make the room feel a bit fuller.
Halfway through one salad he realizes he probably should’ve made you eat as well. Even though these salads aren’t remotely filling, they’re much healthier than some soggy fries. A piece of limp lettuce hangs from Jungkook’s mouth, suddenly feeling guilty for soaking up all of your amenities without inviting you. After all, it is your house. Wiping some sauce from his lips he dusts off his pants, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he makes his way to your room.
Calling your name, the only reply is the whir of the heater. He only cracks the door a tad, but he sees you slumped against the edge of the bed, bare feet hanging from the end. You barely made it, your clothes strewn across the floor, an oversized t-shirt ruched across your barely covered thighs. Without a thought he quickly scrambles to move you closer to your pillows, and then wraps your body in your plush duvet. You’re out like a light.
You’re sleeping, so Jungkook should go home. That’s what you two agreed to. He goes back to his late dinner (early breakfast?) mindlessly listening to an infomercial on rare dollar coins. He’ll leave after he eats.
He didn’t leave.
Jungkook awakes to a scream, your shrill voice echoing all the way down the hallway into your living room. It takes a second for him to register the empty white walls and the fact that he’s not in his apartment, but eventually it goes back to the point that you’re in distress. He jolts, scrambling off the couch to run to your bedroom.
“What is it?” he exhales into your doorframe, socks sliding.
Your hair is in a disarray, shirt rumpled and face scrunched in pain. You shove your phone in his face. “Since when did Iron Man die!” you cry, genuinely horrified at whatever entertainment article you’re reading.
He slumps against the wall, running a hand over his dry face. “Since Endgame, obviously. That was literally two years ago. Is that why you woke me up?”
“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t know!”
“Have you been living under a rock or something?”
“Or something,” you frown, throwing your phone across your bed, “I guess I should go get ready for work.”
Jungkook watches as you shamelessly hop off your bed, uncaring that your shirt has ridden up, revealing the full expanse of your thighs and then some. You pull out a pair of sweats from a shopping bag, nicking off the tag to put them on your legs.
“Do you have work?” you ask casually.
“Uh, no,” Jungkook coughs, crossing his arms. It’s been awhile since he’s had a solid gig. Two whole weeks have been spent doing more personal work which was fine, but at the same time his bank account could beg to differ. “I’m off today.”
“Oh, alright,” you shrug, “do you know where I can buy a good camera?”
“Why?”
“Gonna go take pictures,” you snatch your wallet and keys from your bedside, stuffing it in a fanny pack. He watches you curiously as you zip your bag shut, muttering something about how you can’t believe that fanny packs are back in style. Swinging the strap over your back, you brush past him. “You can stay if you want,” you add pointedly, before you slip into the bathroom.
Jungkook doesn’t understand as to why he’s slipping into sensory overload. The house is a shell of itself and the antithesis of a rainbow. Maybe it’s the fact that he woke up ten minutes ago or how you look completely peaceful and want to leave as soon as you wake up. Or how shocked you were that Iron Man has passed and you’ve completely missed Phase 3. Or that you’re not even thinking about breakfast or not wishing him a farewell, practically throwing him into your apartment like a second home.
He wobbles back to the couch, trying to look as nonchalant as possible as he drapes the fuzzy blankets over his body. He flips through the channels, before finally settling on an old episode of Sky City.
When you walk out into the living room, you scrunch your face in pain when you make eye contact with Kim Seokjin’s on screen appearance. Oh, how things change. Jungkook knew how much you loved watching Sky City, indulging in the protagonist's attractiveness.
“Y’know,” Jungkook says over his shoulder, “if you leave me here, I could steal whatever I want.”
“Go ahead,” you reply flippantly, already slipping on your sneakers. “There’s nothing of value here.”
What is wrong with you?
“Wait!” Jungkook throws all his pride at the window, unable to conceal his worry for you. Half your body is out the doorway, and you’re looking at him like he’s grown a second head. His voice takes up the entirety of the room, startling you. “I need to come with you,” he finally settles on, looking serious. “You’re going to buy the wrong camera.”
“Okay,” you concede immediately, throwing the keys on the couch, “you drive.”
Jungkook must know something’s wrong with you.
You don’t know how to act around him. Your heart is hurt and your body is a decade older than it was a week ago and everything in your life and mind is a complete wreck. It still aches to look at him, despite the fact that you want him around, all the time. You wish you could know a little more about your adult life, you feel like a proverbial Bambi sitting in a car worth more than your childhood home. It’s a wobbly, shaky road to adulthood, and you’re not having it.
Jungkook sleeping over is the last thing you thought would happen last night. You didn’t even think he’d relent to coming to your house, since he was pretty hellbent on not being your photographer.
But now he’s driving your Tesla again, after you instructed him to park the car where you parked it last time. That way, you can go back to the playground you were in the night before. You have a vision for the issue and it starts there. Fiddling around with the expensive camera Jungkook picked out, you feel his gaze burning into your shoulder.
“Am I doing something wrong?” you ask archly, “I read the manual and everything. Or are you just being a perfectionist again?”
“What’s wrong with being a perfectionist?” Jungkook shoots back, putting the car in park. As soon as the car stills in the parking lot, he grabs the camera from your grasp like a petulant child. “I’m just trying to make sure you don’t break it. Face it, you’re terrible at technology.”
“Excuse me! I have a Samsung 25+ and a Tesla!”
“Yeah? So why did I catch you struggling to use your pay feature on your phone when we grabbed coffee?”
“It’s new,” you mutter under your breath. Everything is new to you.
With a growl you snatch back the camera, and Jungkook for once doesn’t act like a baby with a sharing complex and relents. Of course, Jungkook manages to calibrate the camera and figure out the color balance before you could. This only annoys you further, wondering why Jungkook is still sticking around after all this time.
“Alright,” you step out of the car, slinging the camera around your neck. “Thanks for driving me around, your apartment’s just down the street, right?” You dart your hand out, and Jungkook reluctantly hands over your key beeper. Maybe it’s because he seems to love the car so much, that he has a hard time giving it back. “I’ll see you around.”
“Wait,” is that his word of the day? Wait wait wait.
“What is it now, Jungkook?”
He’s never seen you so full of negative emotions. You’ve been waiting for him to tire of you all day, from your clipped replies and unease ever since you two stepped out of your apartment.
“Um,” he looks embarrassed, scratching the back of his head, “are you really going to take pictures? You always took really blurry pictures in high school.”
The mention of high school has you icy, gripping the matte black digital camera to hold your feelings at bay. “Yes, I’m going to go take pictures because the photographer I wanted so rudely rejected me,” you revel in the way he shrinks, probably regretful already. “So if you’ll excuse me, I have a deadline.”
He continues to follow you, all the way to the park. You make your way to a little garden, and start to take some test photos next to the little daisies that decorate the patch of dirt. You practically feel Jungkook breathing down your neck, feeling antsy everytime you click the shutter. Ignoring him is difficult, especially when he makes little noises of discomfort when you presumably do something wrong.
“Jungkook, are you going to say something?” you seethe, not caring that the heavy camera strains your neck when it falls against your chest, “or are you just going to make me wait.”
Jungkook’s face is scrunched up, and finally he blurts, “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“For saying your life is picture perfect,” he sputters quickly, looking very sweaty. Jungkook always got sweaty when he did things a little too hard. Playing sports, thinking, campaigning on video games. “I—I didn’t mean it. I don’t know. I guess I was just upset at myself and I took it out on you.”
“Well why are you upset at yourself?”
“I’m upset because I—I don’t know, it’s complicated,” he plops down on the nearest bench, and while you follow him, you don’t let yourself sit next to him. If you do, you know your subconscious will want to wrap your arms around him and comfort him. That would probably be the worst possible action to perform. “I don’t really do the whole photoshoot thing. Like I said, I’m just doing some weddings and parties here and there. I shouldn’t have said those things about Jimin and how you’re only talking to us out of charity. It’s my fault for not considering how complicated your life could be too,” he looks down at the ground, shameful, “so if you still want me, I would really like to photograph for Ego. And I would also really like that camera back.”
Unable to resist, you reach over to give him a pat on the shoulder. “I forgive you,” you reply numbly, thinking he was going to apologize for something else. You suppose he’s forgotten about that fateful prom night, just like everyone else. “It’s actually not for Ego, at least not yet. My boss is pitting us against each other, the best idea wins the cover theme.”
“Don’t worry, we’ll win,” his face eventually breaks into a grin when you remove the camera from your body. “Come to daddy, baby,” he cooes, holding the shiny new camera in his hands like a newborn.
“Gross,” you twitch, although you’re feeling all the more relieved knowing Jungkook will now be taking the visual reins. “You haven’t had a chance to look at the contract made up, but being paid five-hundred okay?”
“Five-hundred a week?”
“No, per day,” you correct, “why wouldn’t I pay you just like I pay the others?”
Jungkook’s dark brows fly to his forehead. He practically chokes on his spit at the way you put Jungkook in high regard. A blush overtakes his visage, proud and pink as he rushes to get away from you.
“You don’t even know my concept,” you called after him, chasing the midday sun.
Jungkook is already in position, fitting the lens between two buildings. The afternoon sun looks like an egg yolk, melting between the clouds. “Well then is it?” he asks, bending down on one knee to get the perfect angle.
“Well, yesterday when I thought of the idea I just wanted to be reminded of how easy being a kid was,” you don’t even know if Jungkook’s listening properly, given the rapid click click clicks of the shutter and Jungkook constantly moving around to get as many shots as possible. “I realized that not everyone can relate to the models or the clothes we advertise on Ego. Why would I want to see people I actually admire? Like, my friend’s older brother. Or Jimin, president of the drama club. Or even Jungkook, captain of the lacrosse team.”
“So, nostalgia. The 2000s are back in style, I like it,” he replies simply, tilting the camera towards you, “pose for me.”
“What? Jungkook,” you frown, holding a hand over your face. He doesn’t relent, continuing to snap you in different angles.
“Oh! That was a nice one,” he turns the camera to reveal the screen of your furrowed brows, hand over your face, “looks super grunge. Totally a throwback look.”
“Jungkook, I don’t model. I’m just the one who throws the ideas.”
“Yeah, but. Wouldn’t it be cool if the readers of Ego could see the genius behind the paper and ink?” he gestures vaguely to your outfit, “and you’re wearing Fila. So that’s like, kind of designer?”
“I don’t know,” you hug yourself, “I’ll think about it, okay? Let’s focus.”
“Fine,” Jungkook stops buzzing around you, putting the camera down and following you as you walk back to your car. You don’t think you really need anymore park photos, and Jungkook seems to telepathically agree as well.
“We need to plan some outfits and some backgrounds. I’ve already arranged a meet up tomorrow in front of our old high school with a couple of models. The school is on a grade-wide trip, so we’ll even have access to the track and field. I was also thinking disposable film? We could scan those.”
“Alright, who are your models?”
“Oh, you know. Just friends from school. I wanted it to be as authentic as possible. Taehyung flew back from Hamburg last night, so he said he’ll come. Jimin, obviously.”
“Well you only had like, two friends in highschool.”
“And you,” you clip on with a frown, “so don’t dress like a potato sack tomorrow, okay?”
“I’m not modeling.”
“Well, I’m still looking for a celebrity model to tack onto so. Don’t look like a chump.” you stick out your hand, while Jungkook pouts at your outstretched limb. If he feels sore that you called him a chump, he doesn’t comment on it when he clasps his larger hand in yours. “Partners?”
“Partners.”
“Why didn’t you tell me your celebrity model was him?”
“I specifically told you not to dress like a paper bag. Why did you continue to do so!”
“You didn’t specify that your model was Kim Seokjin!”
The current conversation is hushed, hissed between large reflective light panels and a parked car that held all your rented equipment. Currently, Taehyung, Seokjin and Jimin are huddled on the bleachers of your old stomping grounds, laughing at whatever funny video Seokjin has pulled up. They’re all dressed in variants of the same sweatsuit, a combination of Taehyung’s choosing since he’s one of the many color coordinators at Ego.
But you haven’t started yet, and you would like to get some morning shots in before it gets any warmer. Jungkook is still petulant, pretending to buy time by balancing his tripod. He’s wearing his Birkenstocks, so old they’re definitely the same pair from highschool, and yet another black sweatsuit.
“Seokjin’s like a big, fat cheeseball,” you assure Jungkook, who’s actually shaking from being in the presence of a celebrity. “No reason to be nervous.”
“That man has literally been part of our Sitcom Sundays for three years,” he gripes, “of course I’m nervous!”
“Just go to the car. If you want to change I’m sure Taehyung’s brought something that fits you.”
“Well if they see me change they’re gonna see I’m trying too hard,” Jungkook pouts, he actually pouts.
“I can’t,” you turn around, your Miss Frizzle-esque solar system dress whirling around your waist. The stars twinkle, glittering into Jungkook’s eyes. “Jungkook, do whatever you want. But we need to start in ten! No, five! I’m not paying you to try on Balenciaga and Off-Brand!”
If Jungkook is shocked by your sudden snippiness or need to get things wrapped up, he doesn’t say anything to it. For once, he’s quiet about his needs and you’re thankful for it. Once he’s gone, you have a chance to breathe. It’s all wholly overwhelming to dive right into the job. Your brain is still in 2011 unfortunately.
“Babe, everything alright?”
Seokjin appears behind you, having ditched Jimin and Taehyung after he saw you and Jungkook argue. He smooths his hands over your biceps. You’re still unsure over the exact nature of your adult-self’s relationship, but it seems that sans sex you two are relatively close with each other.
“M’fine,” you mumble tiredly, trying not to stiffen under his hold. You suppose Jimin isn’t going to be the friend you confide into this lifetime. “I’m just nervous. We’re doing all this work and it can potentially go down the drain after this week. What if my idea’s stupid and we’re wasting time? Jennie texted me that her concept is going to be killer and now I’m scared this concept is too aesthetically soft and people don’t care about nostalgia anymore and I feel like simultaneously throwing up and crying—”
“Whoa whoa, who’s replaced my confident editor and where did she go?” Seokjin decidedly goes with the notion that you’re definitely not fine. He swings his neck back and forth, peering behind the bleachers and over the football field. “My confident editor would never talk bad of herself like this! She commanded a whole crew of fifty within seconds when she did the Kim Taeyeon shoot in Milan! She never cowers under a challenge, the challenge cowers to her!” and in his gallancy you no longer try to shy away, in fact you even giggle at his silly way of comforting you. “And most importantly, she’d never compare herself to a wench like Jennie.”
Seokjin doesn’t hesitate to swipe the moisture right under your waterline, making sure any traces of your crying are undetectable. “W-wait,” you sputter, “you mean, me and Jennie aren’t actually friends?”
He chuckles, pulling you into a hug. “Even now, you’re such a good actress.”
You let Seokjin continue to hold you as the pieces in your empty mind come together. If Jennie is truly not your friend and you two have been faking it all this time, how serious is it? And if so, are you the competitive type? You know for sure Jennie is, and will she stop at nothing to make sure she gets the spread?
This fear is combined with an equal amount of sadness. You were a little excited to have a lasting friend from college, but your mother always told you to never believe anything on the internet. You suppose those selfies of you and Jennie on your Instagram are nothing but a facade.
But at the very least Seokjin’s care for you isn’t fake, and you’re thankful that you have at least one friend in this life. If you didn’t do this time skip, would Seokjin remain your only friend? You try not to think too hard about it, “Thanks, Seokjin. I really appreciate you.”
“Will you appreciate me tonight then?” Seokjin makes a move to kiss your neck, and the moment is promptly ruined.
Shoving him away you say firmly, “Touch me like that again and I’ll rip your dick off in front of this whole crew.”
“I love it when you get feisty,” Seokjin melts, but salutes you like a drill sergeant as he runs back to the men on the bleachers.
It’s then you feel a presence looming over your shoulder. Tall, dark, and emanating. He’s changed, in favor of some fitted jeans and a plain white shirt, paired with black boots. Jungkook is behind you, glaring over your shoulder at Seokjin. So much for showing off your professionalism. Crap, how much of that did he hear?
“Jungkook, I–”
“Let’s start,” he mutters gruffly, stepping past you to get to the equipment.
You slap a hand over your face. It’s going to be a long day.
However, the hours following are probably one of the brightest hours of your life since you’ve appeared in your future-self’s body. At first Jimin was anxious at your invitation, despite being in the high school plays and being okay at public speaking, he didn’t know he’d have the potential to be a model. A couple test shots and some coaching from Taehyung, Jimin is a natural, his photogenic energy strong enough to compete toe-to-toe with Seokjin.
You also have to hand it to Taehyung, who has been running back and forth between modeling and choosing outfits for the boys. Jimin and you didn’t run in the same group as Taehyung back in high school, but time changes things and if given the opportunity, you would’ve loved to be friends with him back then.
By the time you are done for the day and you feel like all the possible shots have all ready been taken, you circle around the school. You previously went inside empty classrooms, posed in the cafeteria, even pretended to reenact your school rendition of RENT in the auditorium.
Everything is mostly packed up and put into the car by the time the sun is setting, and you just wanted to perfect this one shot.
The gymnasium looks a lot smaller than it did as a child. As a teenager, you constantly feared getting hit in the face by a stray wiffleball, or throwing up during the pacer test after the 100th lap. But now, it just looks like an old gym.
“It smells like sweaty balls in there,” Taehyung curses, adjusting the patterned button down by smoothing down his chest. He jabs a finger in the boys locker room, where Jimin comes out with another new outfit.
“I think the sandwich I left in senior year is still there,” Jimin adds, pulling the collar around his burgundy knitted sweater.
The back of the gym is decorated in balloons. Overnight you managed to build a balloon ring off of Pinterest, one of your proudest moments as you made Jungkook haul the rainbow colored arc and shove it into the trunk. Seokjin is sitting directly under the arc, decorating a letter corkboard. It’s one of those cork boards all the teachers display in class, often decorated with some witty quote or a basic “Welcome to Mr/Mrs/Miss _____’s Class!”
Jungkook is setting up the camera on a tripod, wanting to do it the old fashioned way. Aside from the freakout he had in the beginning when he realized he was photographing Kim Seokjin, he’s been quiet and strictly professional throughout the whole ordeal. It’s amazing to see this side of him, as he seamlessly transitions from shoot to shoot knowing exactly what he has in mind for each photograph. His direction is soft but impactful, and the boys have no problems following directions.
“Okay boys, everyone under the arc!”
Working like this is a rush you can’t even imagine. In high school the path you were in the process of choosing wasn’t clear cut up until this point, but now you know exactly what you want to do for the rest of your life.
Seokjin holds the finished corkboard in the middle, a proud Class of Ego in white block letters.
Jungkook only gets a few shots in before Seokjin bemoans, letting the corkboard fall in his lap.
“Guys, this picture’s gonna stink.”
Jungkook’s appalled, “Excuse me—”
“Because you two aren’t in it!” Taehyung agrees easily, “c’mon, JK. Put your camera on timer mode and let’s have all of us in it!”
A blush melts on Jungkook’s neck, all the way to the tips of his ears. “What? No, that’s silly Tae. I really don’t—agh!”
The three men are in a controlled frenzy, aiming to get their mission done. Seokjin rounds the camera and makes quick work of enabling a timer and a burst shot. Jimin pulls you by the waist, tugging you ungracefully to the center of the arc. Taehyung is doing a pretty good job of hauling your muscle hunk of a photographer, pressing his shoulders across yours.
And finally, Seokjin hands you the corkboard. “You should be holding it. After all, you’re the brains behind it!”
At first it feels awkward, squished between new friends and old friends. First loves and last loves. Despite his warm bicep pressing against you, Jungkook is akin to a sheet of cardboard, arm-to-arm and stiff as a board.
“Alright people, let’s move it!” Seokjin yells unnecessarily loud, the noise echoing throughout the high walls. “Last couple shots here, and we’re not re-doing it because I’m tired as hell! So look alive and pretend to like each other!”
The first click of the camera stuns all of you, akin to many terrible school photos where the flash disarms you and your face twists. But that click suddenly gets Jungkook into gear, and you feel him slide a hand over your shoulder, squeezing you toward him so you’re pressed against the side of his chest. He still smells like floral fabric softener, and that makes you smile.
And suddenly you feel like you’re seventeen again, surrounded with the people you care for the most.
“So, the tabloids are true huh?” Jimin smirks, waving a flimsy fry in your face.
“T-tabloids?” you sputter, dabbing the ketchup off your cheek. The greasy burger slips off your grip and onto your plate. Your expression says it all, it’s painfully innocent and genuinely confused as you attempt to swallow the cheese and lettuce as fast as possible.
The crew sans Seokjin is eating a very late dinner with you at the restaurant of their choice. They put it to a vote, while you desperately wanted some McDonalds everyone else voted for a more high end restaurant. After all, you’re paying.
“Ah, don’t try playing coy with us,” Taehyung jests, “the office talks.”
“Well, whatever you’ve heard isn’t true,” you huff, crossing your arms. “At least, not anymore.”
“What?” Taehyung bugs out, “I thought you loved your no strings attached relationship with Jinnie.”
“I guess I did,” you frown, deflating against the plush booth, “I don’t know. I don’t know what I liked back then.”
You resume eating your burger, trying to ignore the worried look Jimin sends you. He reaches over the table to press his thumb to the little 11s in your forehead, a product of stress. “Does your head still hurt?” he asks.
Jungkook’s chewing slows considerably. He’s been strangely quiet this evening, opting to order a handful of appetizers and gorging on every single edible thing on the table like a glutton. But at Jimin’s question he turns his head to look at you, “Why would your head still hurt?”
“She hit her head when she went out drinking with Seokjin last week,” Jimin supplies, “messed with her memory.”
“Chim,” you frown, gently shoving him off you, “I’m fine now. Pretty much caught up. Just reevaluating my life choices, okay?”
“How could Seokjin let that happen?” Jungkook asks, putting his fork down.
“He wasn’t even there,” you shake your head, trying to clear Seokjin’s name as fast as possible. After all, this lie is completely fabricated, a blanket to cover the magical properties your true nature being here has. “I’m fine, Jungkook. Don’t worry about me.”
He huffs, resuming his meal. “Wasn’t worried,” he disarms, reaching over the table to snatch a mozzarella stick.
You cover up your disgusted expression by wiping your chin with a soft blue napkin. Jungkook is really out here inhaling the whole table and being a bit of a jerk.
“Well,” Taehyung claps his hands together, regarding all of you with a closed-lipped smile stretched so wide you’re worried he’ll break. “This is nice. I can’t imagine a time where I’d be reunited with you three. It’s weird. But a good weird.”
“Ditto,” Jimin echoes, lifting his glass to clink with Taehyung’s. Throwing an arm over your shoulder he remarks, “could’ve never imagined my ‘ol best friend would’ve wanted to pursue fashion.”
“What?” you glower, pinching his thigh, “I love fashion! I spent months planning my Clueless Halloween costume and our summers cosplaying!”
“Right, Cher,” teased Jimin, “that yellow plaid suit that made you look like a bottle of mustard?”
“You little–”
Taehyung begins to laugh when you start to tickle Jimin in the sweet spots, causing Jimin to curl his leg around your ankle and pull you onto his lap for a hair pull. It’s all in fun and nothing hurts, but you’re so caught up in it you’re sure people are worried about your well-being. Even Jungkook is laughing, egging Jimin on while Taehyung weakly attempts to pull you away.
If you could rewrite the last ten years of your life, this moment would define the remake.
“Why are we here?”
“For research purposes.”
“Are you sure the actual purpose is because you don’t feel like working in the office?”
“Jungkook,” you groan, tired of his infinite amount of negativity. “This was our senior trip! Of course I want to get a couple shots in before my big presentation.”
“You’re risking my baby’s life,” Jungkook cradles the digital camera closer to his chest, swaddling it between its felt case. Ever since you purchased the camera, Jungkook has been unable to let it go. This adoption is both equal parts cute and strange, and you’re a little too scared to ask for it back.
“I promise, no big rides,” you roll your eyes, “your baby will be fine.”
The local amusement park is a fan-favorite amongst the city-goers, a reprieve from the hustle and a chance for you to spend your copious amounts of money on overpriced sugar and popcorn. The last time you went here was two weeks ago—in your mind. In Jungkook’s mind it was over ten years ago and he probably doesn’t even remember the time spent roaming the artificial floor and the infinite amount of bubbles that seem to eject from the air to add to the whimsical charm.
Jungkook isn’t even paying attention, citing it as an artist block because he’s going through sensory overload with the amount of stimuli in the crowd. Screaming teenagers wailing under him from a nearby rollercoaster, the smell of sticky caramel apples pumping through the diffuser stands, and the amount of gaudy color that decorates every single logo of the park.
He plops himself down on a nearby bench while you wait in line to get some food. It’s early in the morning and a weekday, so you figure this is the best time to get some photographs in without any passerbys. You figure Jungkook will get the hang of it once he has some food in his stomach.
“A funnel cake?” Jungkook is bewildered when you return with the confection in hand, “it’s ten A.M.”
You raise a brow, knowing how much Jungkook loves sweet foods. The funnel cake especially, he ate at least three when you went to your senior trip, one for every meal. But you’re an adult, or at least posing as one, and you shrug loftily, plucking a hot piece of fried dough from your plate. “Alright then,” you reply, “I’ll just eat the whole thing.”
Once the cake touches your tongue, you can’t help but make an exaggerated moan in pleasure. You can feel Jungkook squirming like an earthworm next to you, either from the scrumptious smell of funnel cake or the way you’re so enthusiastically eating it.
“W-wait,” Jungkook’s stomach growls at the perfect moment, “I want some. But I don’t want to get the camera dirty, pass me a napkin.”
“I can just feed it to you!” you quip innocently, immediately ripping off a piece and shoving it between Jungkook’s pink lips. You feel a little slick in the finger, saliva briefly coating your digits before you pull away. You swallow, feeling a familiar tingle in your tummy and a sickening heat low in your belly.
You fight back a sigh, wondering if your libido also did a massive growth spurt in your twenty-seven years of age.
Jungkook is placated at the touch of food, and you take turns feeding yourself and feeding him while more customers trickle in the park. Confectioners sugar dusts Jungkook’s long-sleeved tee, the white color staining the dark fabric. You reach to pat his chest, ignoring the toneness that still remains from high school.
“Alright, let’s ride,” you declare, pulling Jungkook up once you’re done eating.
“Do we have to?”
“What happened to the adrenaline junkie I once knew?”
“He realized being an adrenaline junkie doesn’t make money and he should stay on the ground.”
“Alright, Negative Nancy,” your reply has no bite to it, and suddenly you wished you invited Jimin or Seokjin before Jungkook. Jungkook may have the talent, but he certainly doesn’t have the attitude. You don’t even get why he’s still defensive, after all you thought he apologized in the beginning. It’s not like you’re the problem.
“Gimmie your hand,” your thoughts cut out when Jungkook offers his large hand in front of yours, palm up.
“Why?”
“C’mon,” he whines, settling for snatching your hand instead. His palms feel larger, rougher as they enclose your smaller hand. “Now hurry up and walk in front of me. I’m gonna take a picture.”
You already have a feeling as to what this picture is going to look like, so you scrunch your nose. “That is so cheesy.”
“It’s for the nostalgia factor, now hurry up and pretend we’re on a date.”
You roll your eyes but relent, jogging a few steps ahead so you can get into character. This pose used to be a popular one, where the sweet boyfriend would be dragged around by the girlfriend’s hand, tugging him to wherever she wanted to go. It’s super cliche but if Jungkook figures it’ll fit your theme, you’ll do it. Eventually you forget that you’re holding his hand, and point ahead to some rides you want to try out.
“Oh, Jungkook! Remember that one?” you point to a teacup ride, with guests spinning vigorously through their own seat. “Jimin got so sick he fell asleep in the car for an hour!”
Jungkook doesn’t reply, so you turn around and face him. Click. Jungkook smirks at his little trick, which makes you rip your hand from his and walk further.
“Hey, hey,” he chuckles, the first smile of the day. Food really does make him peaceful. “The shot looks good, you look good.”
“Could’ve just asked me to turn around and pose,” you huff.
“Then it would ruin the fun,” he replies, “now c’mon, let’s ride the teacups. For old time’s sake.”
Ten minutes later and the both of you are soon regretting that decision. You’re once again slumped on the bench, this time unable to keep your head up so you rest it on Jungkook’s shoulder while he leans on your head.
“Haven’t rode that since I was a teenager,” Jungkook moans, holding his stomach. “Remind me not to eat so fast before getting on that kind of ride.”
You mirror his expression, feeling green. “Is this what late-adult life feels like?”
“Yep,” Jungkook replies, unbeknownst of how shocked you are at how weak your body has become. “You wake up with back pain, pre-arthritis from all the typing you’ve done over the last decade, and a lot of stress. Definitely not the fantasy you’d imagine from your 20s.”
“You think you’d be less stressed if you kept your lacrosse scholarship?”
“Nah, I think I saved myself,” Jungkook shakes his head, “before I could be any more awful than I already was.”
You refuse that notion, sending him a bitter smile. “Well, look at me. I became awful right after high school.”
“I didn’t mean you—”
“I know,” you hold up a hand to stop him. The two of you follow a red path up the hill, leading to a simple cable car ride. It’s a slow travel ride, made to get from one side of the park to the other with a beautiful view over the lake. “But you see those tabloid articles. They must be true.”
“I—I didn’t think they were all true,” Jungkook’s lying through his teeth to make you feel better, but you don’t care. “Why do you sound unsure?”
You shrug, “Probably wasn’t sober for most of my bad decisions,” considering your friendship with Seokjin and his boisterous drinking attitude, you wouldn’t be surprised, “If they weren’t true, I believe Jimin and I would’ve stayed friends. I can’t imagine why I left my home like that. But I guess it doesn’t matter too much because I came back. And I mean, we’re here together doing work,” you gesture between the small space between each other, “I think that counts for something.”
The two of you walk in silence for a bit, contemplating. The line to the cable car isn’t long but it’s slow, considering the cable only moves a couple meters a second. The take-off area is a risen slab of concrete, and the cars are continuously moving so you have to hop on one car as soon as another guest exits.
There’s a little bit of space between it, a centimeter gap that could be nerve wracking if there’s no staff around. You think nothing of it as you fiddle on your phone, waiting for the staff member to let you and Jungkook in on the next car.
Jungkook enters first, taking great care to cradle the camera in one hand so it doesn’t sway against the car. The car swings a little as well, and Jungkook holds out a hand for you to grab.
Instead you focus on how the once bright glassy pink is sun-ravished, faded and rusting on the metal door flaps. The color is almost pearlescent, vastly different than the vivid color you saw two weeks ago. You almost want to reach out and touch it, wondering where that quality went.
“Bun, be careful!”
The tip of your heel nicks on the stepping stone, slipping like butter as you topple forward. Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to scoop you up, hauling you into the car just as the metal door locks into place. The hard plastic of the camera digs into your chest uncomfortably as you plop on top of Jungkook, between his legs as half his thighs rest against the uncomfortable seat.
“Were you not watching where you were going?” Jungkook huffs, blowing his bangs over his forehead.
Instead of an artful answer you blurt, “You, you called me Bun.”
His eyes widen at your response, and his grip loosens around your body. His eyes dart anywhere but your face, his cheeks ruddied and stained coral as he moves to remove you from his body. “It was a slip of the tongue,” he coughs, turning on his camera and getting shots of the lake.
You huff in response, sticking to your side of the carriage. “I missed it,” you murmur to the wind, although you make yourself loud enough for him to hear.
You try to bury your sour expression in your sleeves, just to hide how absolutely childish you feel. You don’t even care that Jungkook is trying to take pictures of you looking out the view, only trying to eradicate the feelings that are still down deep in your blood. Even the twenty-seven year old Jungkook is charming, albeit in a completely different way.
The grown, mature Jungkook toots to his own horn. He isn’t concerned about a team or an image, and gave it all up to pursue an art he loves. The lacrosse jerseys exchanged for bulky long sleeves, the sport for a camera, and a mask for his true image.
“Let’s go,” Jungkook takes your hand again when the ride stops, not letting go until you’re on steady ground. You figure he must think you walk like a toddler barely on her first mile.
Would Jungkook like you even as an adult? With all this money, this power and this confidence you envisioned as a seventeen-year-old, it still doesn’t feel enough for him. In fact, you feel like a sore thumb sticking out, decorated in silly rumors and expensive clothes that separate you far from your roots.
“Hey,” Jungkook touches your arm, pointing to a basketball carnival game, “remember this one?”
“Yeah,” forcing a smile, you follow him to the small crowd that starts to form around the basketball game. The baskets are a short distance from the player, but so high up that it’s hard to tell the shape of the hoop. “I tried to tell you that it was completely rigged. From an angle you can see it’s still oval-shaped.”
“And I told you it didn’t matter if the hoop was an octagon, I’d get you that prize,” he jerks a thumb to the prize booth, where a blue Piplup plush sits proudly with all the other starter Pokemon. “And I did.”
“It’s still in my room,” you reply proudly, even though Jungkook is acting almost immaturely smug. “I, I mean it’s still in my room in my parent’s house. It’s probably lonely because my parents have been on a cruise for almost two weeks.”
He raises a brow, eyes drifting to the booth. “Should I win another one to keep your bed in the city warm?”
“That sounded oddly sexual.”
“You know what I mean,” and Jungkook’s rolling up his sleeves, handing you the camera.
“Jungkook,” you whine when he pulls out a roll of bills from his pocket, as if he prepared for this moment, “Jungkook c’mon—I don’t need any stuffed animals. Ugh.”
You swear that the majority of your day is spent watching Jungkook blow cash on a low-quality stuffed animal with packaging pellets for the inside. Turns out carnival technology has also enhanced over the years, and it takes both your whining and the clerk’s whining to stop Jungkook from blowing his entire wallet to get one basket in. Eventually the staff relents and lets Jungkook take a Piplup keychain instead, glumly handing it over to you.
“I like this better,” you chirp, clipping the ring onto your car keys, “now I can bring Piplup everywhere.”
A small, barely there smile appears on Jungkook’s face.
The rest of the day melts away like that, and before you know it the sun is slipping into the horizon and you’re being dropped off at your apartment. Jungkook even insists to walk you to your door, because your prizes are heavy. (Yes, he went back for the oversized Piplup.)
It’s all too familiar, the way the walk upstairs is achingly slow, as if the moment is stretching itself down the hallway. How Jungkook looks so prideful holding the fruits of his labor, following you with a tug of your hand because the prize is too big for Jungkook to see straight.
At the same time it’s different. The way you wobble around the hallway because you’re a little tipsy from wine flights is noticeable, even cute. How easy it is to not feel nervous when you clutch at his hand. How you two look like a seasoned couple, coming home from an all-day date.
It ends at the front door, and you crack it open so you can slip your prizes through the crack.
“Thanks, Jungkook,” you hold up the SD card that held all the precious memories of this week.
This is where you part ways. You’ll spend the rest of the night editing your presentation, while Jungkook promised to go to a bar with his friends. A little part of you hoped you’d be invited, but you knew that would be impractical considering you have work in the morning.
“Break a leg,” he says, leaning on the balls of his feet with his hands in his pockets, “you’ll do great. You’ve always been meant to do great things.”
The investment he lays on you is insurmountable, and you feel yourself flush with simultaneous excitement and anxiety. Unknowing how to calm your nerves, you give him a small “thank you” and put your hand on the knob to slip away.
“Wait—”
You blink, a deer in the headlights as Jungkook swoops down and kisses you.
You’ve received kisses—kisses reserved for a twenty-seven year old, before. Seokjin is an eager lover, and you felt it that fateful morning and even during your photoshoot when he tried to be sneaky and pull you away. Fleeting bites, kisses to the neck that are wet and hot.
Jungkook’s kiss does not feel like that. It feels like home. It feels like coming home after a long day of work, wrapping yourself in an old afghan and a hot cup of tea. The feeling of hot laundry, fresh front the dryer and smelling of floral softener. It tastes like ten years lost in a void, returning to your senses and lighting you up.
He holds you as if you’ll disappear right in front of him. Large hands cup your face, like a precious thing he never wants to let go. Your hands can do nothing but grapple after his, nails digging into his skin.
“Good night, Jungkook,” you send him a lovestruck smile, a puppy love face.
“Good bye, Bun,” he replies simply, jogging down the hallway.
Being twenty-seven starts to feel a little more like heaven.
Jennie used to annoy you in high school, but now she just down right scares you.
Her presentation is one straight out of a thriller, with red shadow lights and neon green splattered in the dark room. Her models are intense, her designs are beautiful but overwhelmingly chaotic, and the whole affair is rather grotesque. The headline Fashion Suicide glares at you in a morbid scarlet font.
Hoseok sends her a tight-lipped smile, and presses a button on his desk. “I need my antacids, Krystal,” Hoseok deadpans.
Nothing betrays Jennie’s wicked expression, in fact her smirk widens at Hoseok’s fear.
You on the other hand, are cool as a cucumber when you walk up to the front of the conference room. In fact, you barely have to say anything as the presentation presents itself. Jungkook took the liberty of making a video compilation for you, one that they could use in YouTube and Instagram promotions.
“This, is preserving our youth,” you declare proudly, letting the video play. The music that accompanies it is very coming-of-age, like a yearbook slideshow of all the pictures you took. Taehyung, Jimin and Seokjin hold their arms around each other in matching attire, looking like friends for life. There’s even some videos of you and Jungkook at the park, playfully arguing at each other. “I’m tired of seeing people who could care less about my life, who I can’t relate to.”
“This issue is for the unsung heroes—my best friend’s older sibling, the captain of the football team, and the black sheep with a dream.”
The video cuts to Jungkook, looking ultra cool at the camera while he’s dictating Seokjin’s moves. It was taken on your phone, and you’re zooming in on Jungkook’s serious face before it breaks into a laugh, eyes crinkling and bunny teeth showing at whatever stupid thing Seokjin said.
And finally, the video fades into a mock cover. The five of you are beaming at the camera, cheek-to-cheek as you hold up the placard: Ego: Class of Youth.
Needless to say, the issue is yours.
You ignore Jennie’s icy stare as you leave the room to negotiate with the creative teams on a set schedule. However, it seems that you can’t get a bit of rest when Jennie waits for you in your office.
“Jennie, get off of my desk,” you frown, watching a coffin-tipped nail flicking against a photograph of you holding hands with Jungkook in the amusement park. It hangs on a corkboard, standing up with all the other ideas that you and Jungkook have spent the last week meticulously planning.The black enamel scratches at your smiling face. You are not having this, not after all your hard work and all the meetings that have just been planned.
Her feet dangle in the air, kicking back and forth as she sings your name. “You’re still such a child,” she sighs dramatically. “In fact, I think your cute little-wittle idea would suit something more like Highlights or Disney Monthly.”
“You’re just upset I did better than you,” you cross your arms.
Jennie’s nail slices your visage in half.
“You’re right,” Jennie turns a 180 and gives you a bright, candy-coated smile. “Your idea is so good, it doesn’t suit Ego. In fact, I’m sure the editors at Mono will pay a pretty penny.”
“Excuse me?”
“Ugh, you are such a fake.” Jennie giggles, “now, did you send this idea to Namjoon yet? Their publishing date is two weeks before ours, so I’m sure they’re getting to work on this whole Throwback Thursday spread.”
You can’t believe the words coming from Jennie’s mouth. Before all of this, just how awful of a person were you? How could you sabotage your company on the regular, just to get paid a little extra dough for a rival company? It makes you think about what could’ve possibly changed. Had leaving your friends without a care in the world made you into this lost adult, grappling at the seams for attention? In college, did Jennie coerce you into being manipulative and backstabbing, and because without Jimin and needing confidence in a friend, you reluctantly agreed?
The coffee from this morning starts to back up in your throat, but you immediately tamp it down. No, you can’t be pushed around like this. You can’t keep pushing people around. You don’t want a life like this, and if you ever return to your old life, you’ll damn make sure you’ll create a future without Jennie in the picture.
“I’m not going to send anything to Mono, and I’ve already fessed up to Hoseok,” you lift your nose in the air, voice impeccably clear for someone who’s absolutely bluffing. But Jennie’s face hits the ground, immediately buying your lie. You suppose you did become a good actress after ten years. Maybe Seokjin taught you a few pointers. “So if I were you, I’d swallow your tongue before words get around. I worked it out but don’t be surprised if a pink slip comes your way.”��
Turns out that no matter what, high school never ends. There will always be backstabbers and freaks and geeks. A mean girl that you subconsciously try so hard to appease, a grade that defines your life, and drama up to the neck.
“He doesn’t like you, y’know,” Jennie whispers, but the words are loud and clear and you know exactly who she’s talking about. “Never had, and never will.”
“You’re wrong,” you hold your hands, clasping them together to keep them from trembling, “he likes me.”
So you leave the office, determined to prove yourself. That kiss last night was nothing short of magical, and it took a lot of strength for you to not drive up to Jungkook’s apartment in the morning in the hopes for another one. You pick up a pizza near his place, filling it up with your favorite toppings on one half and his favorites on his. A bottle of peach champagne is nestled between your arms. In the bathroom while waiting for your pizza, you’ve wriggled out of your tight suit and into a blue hoodie and bicycle shorts. Tonight, you’re celebrating.
You’re vibrating as you’re knocking eagerly on his front door, excited to tell him the news. You hear a rustle from the couch, and some blankets shifting about. He must’ve passed out after going to the bar, how cute.
But when the door opens, the vision in front of you is far from cute.
A woman, with cat eyes and a slim figure, tilts her head at you. She’s dressed in a large white shirt, transparent enough to show her lacy black bra and panties. Bruises decorate her neck and thighs, like red and purple gems. Her long black hair swishes, slightly frizzy at the bottom.
“Can I help you?” her voice is sultry and velvety. “Are you looking for JK?”
It’s obvious as to what transpired. Jungkook dipped after kissing you and fucked another woman. A woman who’s the complete opposite of you. Someone flirty and sexy and willing to give Jungkook what he wants. You don’t know who you should be mad at.
“Who’s at the door?” Jungkook calls from the inside, and you nearly drop your bottle at the sound of the rasp. They must’ve had a fuckfest if they’re just waking up now.
Your cheeks are burning. Your heart is aching. And the vile that bubbled up from Jennie’s tirade is now resurfacing. From the way your eyes are watering, you must look like a crybaby.
“Say, JK,” the woman closes the frame tighter around her small head, preventing you from seeing inside and for Jungkook to peer, “do you have any pathetic ex-girlfriends?”
“No,” comes the muffled reply, “come back to bed, it’s getting cold without you,” the pizza starts to burn uncomfortably against your grip, “why the random question?”
“Dunno, seems like you’ve had at least one.”
At that moment, your savior appears in grey jeans and a beige hoodie. Jimin walks up to the floor, clutching a bag of groceries. It’s not hard to put two and two together as he spots you looking incredibly small in front of the strange woman, trying so hard not to break down.
Your tears finally fall when Jimin reaches you. “Wrong room,” you mutter under your breath, quickly following your old best friend when he shoves you in his apartment.
No words need to be explained when Jimin leaves the groceries on the coffee table and he’s pulling you onto his lap. You clutch him like a koala, rubbing mascara and blush all over his clothes as you sob. He pats your back and soothes your hiccups by offering you a glass of water. The stages of your meltdowns are pretty cut and dry, even after ten years. He still encourages you to finish the whole glass. He makes sure you have something to eat. He cuts your pizza into little bite sized pieces and feeds you. He doesn’t pressure you to talk until you’re ready, although he has a hunch as to what’s going on.
And when you talk, he doesn’t expect a firm, “Take me home,” from you.
“O-okay,” Jimin agrees immediately, pulling you into a sitting position. “Uptown, right? We can call an Uber or something and order from a restaurant.”
“No,” you reply firmly, “Home-home. I want to go back to my parent’s house.”
“That’s fine too,” he squeezes your shoulder, accepting the fob you hold out to him, “it’ll take about an hour, but I think the drive will be nice.”
So you two sneak off into the sunset, clutching twin slices of pizza as you roll away into your Tesla. Jimin is right, ten minutes into the drive and you’re soothed by his smooth driving and the scent of fried cheese and dough. Your friend has been calm all this time, so you figure this is the right time for him to pop off. Again, this is also part of your breakdown routine.
“Say, does this thing do calls?” Jimin asks, fiddling with the settings on your steering wheel, “Tesla, call Jeon Jungkook.”
“Jimin,” you say weakly, although the little malicious side of you wants to goad him on. You don’t bother to fight the best friend territorialism, you just watch as his hands clutch at the steering wheel as the speakers ring.
Jungkook picks up on the second ring, “Hey!” he says brightly, and it makes your chest pang to know how oblivious he is, “how did the presentation go?”
“Fuck you, Jungkook!” you cover your free hand on your ear at Jimin’s shrill yell, louder than the speakers that carry Jungkook’s voice. “Fuck you for breaking my best friend’s heart twice!”
The silence is deafening. It’s scary, like you could slash a butter knife right through the tension.
Jimin continues, “I can understand high school because you were a real doofus, but this! You fucking lead my best friend on, only to fuck another girl right under her nose! She came all the way to your apartment from a long-ass day at work to celebrate and you ruin that day! I thought you’ve grown for the better but turns out nothing has changed since prom night. You’re still the stupid, confused little boy that doesn’t want to admit how they really feel,” you gasp at the blow, watching Jimin’s gritted teeth as he zooms down the freeway on a mission. “Good fucking riddance, Jeon!”
Jimin punches the “hang up” button. A couple seconds of heavy breathing, and he turns to you with a gentle smile.
“So, you want to listen to Taylor Swift’s new album?”
Your room is lost in time. The Hunger Games novels are stacked on your shelf, looking old and worn. A Glee poster hangs over your four-poster bed, the yellow and red faded and the corners hanging by a thread from the old tape. The sheets are a pale pink, ruffly and definitely not in style anymore. When you sit on it, it creaks uncomfortably.
You hug yourself, tucking your knees in as Jimin marvels at the room with an equal amount of awe.
“If you could, would you go back to high school?” Jimin asks, sitting at the edge of your bed.
With a lazy shrug, you smile at your collection of polaroids that are hanging above your vanity. You’re still hurt, but the pain is no longer rolling in waves. “Maybe,” you reply, “probably would’ve taken you to Europe with me.”
He chuckles, “Is that the only thing you would change?”
“If I knew what I knew now?” you tilt your head, “I don’t know.”
Jimin gets off your bed, pressing a kiss into your forehead. “I’m gonna raid the kitchen and see if we can make something for dinner, yeah? Since your parents are on vacation and your fridge is probably empty, don’t judge me if there’s only Totino’s pizza rolls and nuggets in the freezer.”
When Jimin leaves your room, you quietly close the door and lock it. You lean against the cracked wooden door, falling onto the carpet and letting the tears fall. Is this what the rest of your life is going to be like? Evading pain and working too hard and trying everyday to stay afloat? Is adult life always going to be this difficult?
These past two weeks have been nothing short of a rollercoaster. Major highs and major lows, and after today you thought you reached the end of the ride. However, it’s looking like the ride has no destination in mind, rolling in waves and finding a new hill or loop to catch you off-guard.
“Are you kidding—how did you know we were here?” Another corkscrew.
“You’re a turtle on the road, Jimin. Now move out of the way.”
Jungkook’s voice startles you, and you tense when you see the gold door knob jiggle. Of course as strong as Jimin is, he’s no match for Jungkook. You hear Jimin grumble to curse Jungkook out, and the sound of him stomping down the stairs.
“Hey, open up. Please,” Jungkook’s voice is weak and strained, and you only hug yourself tighter as the knocks continue. “Or, don’t. It seems like you can listen to me perfectly from here. I can hear your breathing.”
You don’t say a peep, preferring to let everything fizzle out. Hopefully Jungkook will give up, say a pathetic sorry and be on his merry way. You don’t know why he’s followed you all the way over here, why would he bother coming when the damage is already done.
There’s a slide of fabric across wood, and you can feel the door shake against your back as Jungkook leans on his side out in the hallway.
“Back in high school, Jennie proposed that I date you to get back at you for stealing Jennie’s sewing sample and getting the higher grade,” you close your eyes, letting the story unravel. “She wanted to build you up before breaking you down, and back then I was vulnerable and thrived on attention, so I thought nothing of it.”
You hear a breathy exhale from his side, as if it pains him to continue, “But obviously, it wasn’t true and I only realized it until I was way too deep. I liked you, so much. Heck, I think I might’ve loved you. We were so wrapped up in this relationship I even convinced myself it was real, until Jennie said she’d crush you at prom night.
“I should’ve tried harder to convince us not to go. I should’ve told Jennie to fuck off. I should’ve come clean. I should’ve done something,” his fist bangs against your door, the vibrations of the impact thrumming in your back, “seeing you so beautiful in that dress all heartbroken because I didn’t act sooner. I’m so fucking sorry.”
Hearing him pour his heart out is like watching your memories in his shoes. The pieces find homes and paint a picture left unfinished.
“And then when you showed up at my doorstep, I was so angry. I knew you felt it. But I wasn’t upset at you, I was upset at myself. I felt so fucking guilty. I hated how easy it was for you to let me back into your life. I hated how easy it was to fall for you all over again. I knew how much I didn’t deserve your forgiveness, but you gave it to me and I was too selfish to refuse. I had so much fun, the most fun I’ve had in awhile.
“I’m sorry I kissed you. I didn’t intend for it to I just, I couldn’t help myself. And then I was so scared that I turned away and made the second biggest regret to date.
“But it proves that we’re not meant to be together. I don’t deserve you,” the last part is hushed, a nail in the coffin, “we can’t turn back the time, but if I could I would change it all. I would be by your side and make your world even better than it is right now. I’m sorry it’s too late.”
You clutch your mouth, suppressing the cries that muffle through the door. You hear Jungkook get up from your old carpet, turn the other way and head downstairs.
Your first love just closed the chapter for you. His words show how much he cared for you, but didn’t know how to express it. How immature he was, how he realized everything too late. And now, he wants to set you free. Even if it is a good thing, it still tears you to shreds.
Moving to your vanity, you pull out the chair and lean your head on the table, eyes poking through your hair. You look awful. The skin under your waterline is puffy and your eyes are red and bloodshot. Your forearms feel greasy, and you lift them up to reveal glitter painting the entirety of your skin. Your eyes dart to the open glitter, the package that Jimin gifted to you that fateful prom night. The compact is broken in half and left on the table, probably a product of your younger cousins fiddling through your old room.
Ignoring the sticky feeling, you let yourself continue to cry. You feel like you’re stuck in the bathroom of the prom venue, waiting for an opportunity to sneak out and go.
But you want nothing more than to go back to that moment. As amazing as your twenty-seven year old life is, you’re not ready for it. You don’t want a life without Jungkook, or a life having to constantly catch up and mend your relationship with Jimin. You don’t want to be the backstabbing bitch that tips off other magazines, or the two-faced woman who messes around with others for the sake of pleasure.
You long to go back. You long to live and grow. To be seventeen and have time to grow in-between.
When you lift your head from your vanity, you’re ten years younger.
You scream.
Your parents dash to your room with a kitchen knife and a confused face. With a wary smile and a teary gaze you say that it’s only a pimple. Your mother giggles and drops the knife, hugging you and helping you conceal the invisible mark. The hug is so warm and so missed that you nearly sigh in content. You’ve missed them.
It’s a little strange to think well beyond your years, your brain still reeling from the trip you’ve just had. Your hands smooth over your body, the previous curves and maturity hidden away in your skin. That’s okay, you don’t mind waiting anymore. There’s much more important things at hand.
If Jungkook isn’t going to realize his mistakes until it’s too late, you have to speed up the process.
Stealing your parent’s keys and hopping in your Accord, you drive off to Jungkook’s. Hair and makeup not done, and still in your plain shirt and jeans. An hour from now, Jungkook will text you saying his car is down and he’ll meet you at the venue.
It’s still rush hour, so he doesn’t notice when you park a few houses down. He’s sitting on his front porch, looking out the road. There’s really nothing in front of him, he’s just staring aimlessly, probably nervous about what’s about to go down tonight. You suppress a sigh, engraving the vision to memory. He looks great in his fitted black suit and tie, a little silver pocket square on the breast to match your dress.
He gets up quickly when he sees you, as if caught in the act. Staring at your plain clothes he asks, “Bun, why aren’t you dressed? Prom’s soon—”
“Jungkook, I want to break up.”
You see it in his eyes. Vulnerability. No longer do you feel insecure, the future told you that Jungkook genuinely did care for you back then. Or in this case, right now. His usual cheery expression crumples at your feet, and his hands fall at his sides. It feels a little unfair, knowing that you have experience under your belt, and Jungkook’s experiencing these feelings for the first time, unprepared.
“What?” he wilts, “why?”
“I know about Jennie’s plan,” you say instantly, unfazed. You give him a tight-lipped smile when realization hits his face. “So I know this whole relationship is orchestrated. The sewing sample fiasco is wrong, obviously. But I’m not going to get mad at you, I know she played you as much as she played me,” you clasp the straps of your purse, stopping you from fidgeting, “we graduate in a few months anyway. We don’t have to see or talk about this ever again. You should go enjoy your prom night with your other friends.”
The present-day Jungkook is still young and confused. He’s at a loss, looking like he’s on sensory overload as he absorbs all the information. You see his eyes flicker to where your Accord is parked, your prom dress hanging on one of the arm pulls. You never even pulled it out of the bag.
“Here,” you pull his corsage from your purse, placing the white rose atop the porch. If you try to put it on him, you fear you may never leave. With a determined huff, you turn around in the direction of your car.
“Where are you going?” he asks, clutching the railing of his porch, “what about prom?”
“I have other plans,” you shrug over your shoulder, “have a good night.”
You don’t look back, although you feel Jungkook’s stare burning in your head. You take great care in going into drive and punching in a new destination in your clunky GPS. This time you have to do things one at a time, once you get your Tesla ten years from now, you’re sure this process will be much easier.
Jimin’s family comes out of the airport, looking impeccable as always. Ten years younger, with puffy cherub cheeks and bright eyes. To your surprise (but also all things considered, it’s Jimin), your best friend comes out in a three-piece suit. It’s burgundy, and suits his dark hair well. He places his luggage into your car, hugs his family good-bye and waits for them to depart in their cab.
“You are all dressed up, and for what,” you chuckle, driving out of the airport.
“Well, when you sent that voicemail that you’d be waiting for me, I changed in the bathroom,” Jimin quips, already fiddling with your radio to play some poppy overplayed music, “but why aren’t you dressed? I thought we were going to be fashionably late to prom. Spill.”
“Hm, let’s talk about it in the morning. I wanna enjoy my prom night,” and you reach over to ruffle Jimin’s soft black strands, “y’know, you’d look really sexy as a blond.”
He pulls down your mirror, positioning it over his face. Pursing his plush lips, he tilts his head. “Yeah, maybe when I’m older,” he grins at his reflection, “so if we’re not going to prom, let’s go get pizza.”
So the two of you get pizza. But not before you take your prom pictures. Your parents meet you at the park with their old digital camera, ready for your impromptu photoshoot. Jimin uses an old tarp to cover the car up while you change in the car, shimmying in your sparkly silver tulle dress. Your hair is held up and away from your face, looking clean enough to be presentable as you pose for the camera. The two of you pick yellow dandelions from the grass, matching flowers as last minute dates. Your parents coo and are happy for you, knowing that even if you don’t attend the actual dance, the pictures will last forever and you’ll smile at them for years.
Eventually you tell Jimin about Jungkook and the whole fiasco (sans the ten year mental time jump.) The reaction is expected, Jimin says he wants to fuck Jungkook up. Surprisingly for him, he doesn’t have to do much to console you. In fact, you sip coolly from your smoothie and say Jungkook will probably let Jimin get a punch in even though Jungkook can bench press his tiny body in half. But you tell him you’re okay, and all you want to do is go home and binge watch.
Jimin carries the pie in his lap while you pull up your driveway. The smell of toasty cheese and fresh dough fill your car.
“I want to watch Sky City,” Jimin sing-songs, “Kim Seokjin is God’s gift!”
You crinkle your nose, “He’s alright.”
“What! You thought he was so hot like, last week.”
“Things change.”
Jimin makes it to your room first, saying he’ll take care of setting things up. He’ll probably steal all the available cushions and make a fort for himself while he puts a picnic blanket on the floor in front of your television. You can imagine him hogging all your stuffed animals, placing it on his side of the carpet while he rifles through your drawers so he can change out of his suit.
Your parents tell you to take out the trash before you have fun tonight. Careful not to get your dress dirty, you hold it away from your body as you waddle out the front door. You make it two steps into the driveway before the soggy trash bag is whisked from your hands.
“I got it,” Jungkook says quietly, and it takes little to no effort for him to haul the large bag into the waiting trash can. His shoulders are slumped under his white button-up, his suit jacket probably stuffed somewhere in the back of the car.
“Jungkook,” you reply, dumbfounded, “it’s only eight, prom isn’t even over yet.”
“I know… but then I realized you weren’t gonna get your money’s worth if you didn’t go. I asked the waitress if she could get me a doggie bag for my date and,” he holds up a stapled bag, presumably the dinner that was supposed to be served, “it’s your favorite.”
“Thank you,” you give him a small, grateful smile as you accept the bag. “But that doesn’t explain why you’re here.”
He bites his lip, stuffing his hands in his dress pockets. “A-and you told me before you left that I should go spend prom night with my friends,” he ruffles his hair, blown out of the pomade and falling into his eyes, “and then I realized that you were right. Jennie and all those people out there aren’t really my friends. They like my rep and they like my attention, but they don’t like me.”
You shake your head, “Jungkook, you’re very likable. Jennie and her group are just one bad bunch.”
“But I don’t wanna be liked by my rep. I wanna be liked for the things I love,” he steps a hesitant step towards you, and he relaxes when he sees that you don’t recoil, “I haven’t told anyone this. But I want to drop that sports scholarship. I applied to an art school, and I got in.”
Suppressing a grin with a bite of your lips, you cheer silently in your head. Things are changing. “I’m so happy for you, Jungkook. Congrats.”
“And I’m sorry for all the fucked up things I did. Jennie may have manipulated me but I definitely was a big part of it,” Jungkook pulls the words out of the sky, finally having enough time to formulate an apology, “but please don’t doubt for a second that my feelings are fake. I really like you, and I wish we got to know each other under better circumstances.”
“I wish we could’ve,” you echo sadly. “But our futures—”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“I liked you, so much. Heck, I think I might’ve loved you.”
You shake your head, frowning at his kicked puppy expression. “I’m considering a fashion school in Europe,” you reach for Jungkook’s hand, squeezing it. Letting him know that everything’s going to be okay. “You and Jimin can visit me during the breaks, Europe has some great spots to photograph.”
Something in Jungkook’s gaze tells you that it’s not enough for him. He wants to be selfish and hold onto you tighter, but you know that’s not good for the both of you right now. “That’d be nice,” he says vaguely, giving you a pained smile.
Jungkook rubs his thumb over your hand, relishing in the softness of your skin. “You look really pretty,” he says, looking forlornly over the dress. He can only imagine how ethereal you’d look under the fairy lights that decorated the venue, “I wish we could’ve had one dance.”
You shrug, “The night’s still young,” you gesture to the space in the driveway, and the lights that overhead the garage.
The slow Taylor Swift music that plays from his pocket is muffled, but it doesn’t deter either of you as he places his hands on your waist and you wrap his around his neck. You’re wearing your bunny house slippers and Jungkook’s neck is moist from his nervous sweats, but you know that this memory will be engraved in your brain for years to come.
It feels good to know that from now on, you don’t have to be so concerned about the future now that you’ve had a taste of it. All you want now is to take it one day at a time. At this moment the, the only thing you want to do is focus on how you’re going to hold onto Jungkook for the last time. At least for now, who knows what will happen in the future.
“I really want to kiss you, Bun,” he leans in, foreheads touching, “but I don’t deserve it.”
“You’re right,” you tease, “you don’t.”
He frowns playfully, “Ouch. But fair.”
Yet you figure you’ve made enough headway these past few weeks, and you deserve to be a little selfish. One last kiss, you think to yourself. Your fingers flatten against the pressed material of his collar, meeting in the middle to clutch Jungkook’s slim black tie. Jungkook bites his lip, looking down at you for permission. With the tiniest of nods, you get on your tippy toe toes you lean forward and you can smell the apple cider lingering on his lips—
“Ohmygod—are you broken up or not!” both of you whip your heads up to see Jimin hanging over your open window, looking absolutely bored. His arms dangle over your sill, wearing a frayed high school jumper. “Either tell him to get lost or invite him over to watch television because I’m hungry!”
You pull away from him fully, squeezing his biceps. “Want pizza?”
He shakes his head, “I think it’s a trap. Jimin’s waiting for me to come up so he can rip my head off,” he gives a tentative wave to the second floor, but Jimin just scoffs and goes back inside, “but I’ll see you Monday.”
“Okay. Good night, Kook.”
“Good night, Bun.”
Your heart pinches a little as you watch him drive away. Before, you knew what the end game was between you two. It didn’t end pretty. Now, you’re not so sure. At the very least, it isn’t ending on a sour note.
Some time later.
“Your majesty,” you give her a practiced smile, taking careful measures not to brush the lady’s shoulders too hard in the fear she’ll whittle away, “emerald is an impeccable color on you.”
The Queen of England (the McDuckin' Queen of England!) just laughs at you and waves you off. You can’t believe you’re photographing a real queen. This is like the childhood equivalent of meeting Malibu Barbie. You thank every single choice and mistake you’ve made in your entire life that has brought you up to this impeccable moment. She’s a vision, you could cry. In fact, you’ll cry later in the comfort of your hotel room. “Do you think the photographer will take long?” she asks, frowning, “I have drinks with my friends in an hour.”
You smirk, pleased to know she’s still kicking it in her golden years. “Yeah, just so long as my husband doesn’t get distracted. Fifteen minutes, tops.”
“I’m not distracted,” Jungkook huffs, pulling away from his tripod. He gives up on trying to stabilize the camera, instead preferring to go freehand for this one. He gives you an incredulous look, hands on his hips, “I have two queens in my viewfinder and I only got room for one. Get out of the shot, Bun.”
With a playful roll of your eyes, you step away from the lady of the hour to let Jungkook do his thing. He’s right in his element, blurting choreographed poses and telling the lighting people to move at his beck and call to get the perfect angle. You stand a distance behind him, letting him take control.
“I’m so hungry,” your whisper is low enough to blend between the jazz music, but loud enough for Jungkook’s ears to listen in, “please tell me you’re almost done.”
“Oui, oui.”
“Wrong language, Kook. Please don’t offend anyone,” and discreetly, you take one step closer in your Tory Burch flats, “did you get any candids of me and the Queen?”
“Duh, Bun,” you can’t see his face but you know he’s grinning, “Jimin will faint.”
"Oh, yes! Thank you, I love you," you gush, reaching over to discreetly pinch his butt.
He shakes his head, looking over his shoulder to give you a brief smirk, "Show me how thankful you are tonight."
So silly, you think. It's amazing how well you work together as two separate entities of a photoshoot yet share a brain cell in the presence of each other. In another world, Jungkook said if given the chance, he'd be by your side and make your world a better place.
Ten years later, it's exactly that and more.
#jungkook x reader#btswritingcafe#btsghostie#kwritersworldnet#jungkook fic#bts fic#bts fluff#bts angst
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...can we discuss the obviously unintended but nevertheless possible queer reading of anzu, given her being in love with an extremely queer-coded man, hanging out mainly with guys, and her immediate and (mostly) unwarranted dislike of the stereotypically straight presenting, conventionally attractive mai
I mean she had a point in disliking mai at first, mai wasn't a great person at the start, but anzu really latches onto these frankly misogynistic reasons for disliking her- anzu didn't mistrust mai because she was cheating, she mistrusted her because she was hot and distinctly feminine. obviously anzu comes around with mai eventually and ends up regarding her as a friend, but it sure didn't start that way. anzu's initial attitude honestly has big "I'm not like other girls" energy- and a lot of girls I personally knew back in the early 2000s who carried around that attitude (myself included) have since come out as some kind of queer.
and again maybe this is just a me projecting thing, but back when I thought I was straight (lol) the men I would "choose" to have crushes on had a tendency to be a bit..................femme-y. and atem? he's a little effeminate sometimes. there's a reason so much of the yugioh fandom reads him as queer himself- many of his mannerisms have a feminine flare to them, especially when you compare him to some of the more stereotypically "masculine" characters like jounouchi and honda.
I'm not saying anzu's feelings for atem aren't real, I think they are- but I do think you can interpret some queerness into the fact that that's the guy she falls for. it's not uncommon for us to be drawn to our own, even unconsciously.
she's also portrayed as a little tomboyish, especially in early season 0, but that's pretty subtle and does change a bit by season one of duel monsters. but it's not uncommon for queer women to bond with guys or to disown some degree of femininity, feeling like they don't have a lot in common with girls their age. this wasn't my personal experience but I've known lesbians and non-binary AFAB people who felt this way.
I'm painting in somewhat broad strokes here, obviously none of these things mean someone definitely is queer, nor are they inherent to female queer identity. Nevertheless, you could interpret it that way.
.............but what does make her queer is her love of broadway musicals and dreams of being a dancer in new york okay good NIGHT
#that last line was a joke#or was it#using this opportunity to spread my bisexual anzu propaganda#and all anzu propaganda for that matter I haven't forgotten how she was treated by the fandom in the mid-2000s#if this post is incoherent blame covid brain#yugioh
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What do you gals think of the men's league? Who's your favorite boxer from it?
Sucker-punch Sarah: I think the men's league is chill (other than Aran obvi). I've talked to them a couple times and am fine with them. My favorite boxer is Mr.Sandman.
Boogeyman: she doesn't usually interact with the men's league. The few times she does is because she uses the fact she's in the Wvba's women's league to introduce her brother to his favorite boxer. Her favorite boxer is Von Kaiser.
Stinger: I have had a couple interactions with the men's league. I think they're cool and love to talk to them. My favorite boxer is Aran Ryan.
Miss.Sunshine: I've had a couple run-ins with the male league. I like their energy and enjoys having conversations with them. My favorite boxer is don flamenco.
Battering Ram: I have a past with a certain Irishman, causing my general dislike of the men's league. If I had to choose the one I dislike the least it would be Bald Bull.
Dolly: I also dislike the men's league. I don't have a favorite boxer but I do have a least favorite and that is Super Macho Man.
Red Viper: I'd say I'm pretty chill with the men's league. I've only talked with them a couple times. I'm neutral about most boxers. My favorite boxer is Piston Honda.
Queen Bee: I am friends with a couple of boxers in the men's league. I love most of their energy and would hang out with them more if I could. My favorite boxer is Disco Kid.
Puppet master: awhile back the wvba had the "amazing" idea to let me fight glass joe. Little to say I won easily. So like dolly I don't have a favorite boxer. My least favorite is definitely glass joe, he's a fucking joke and personally I think I'm better.
kitty Kat: kitty doesn't usually talk with the men's league. Kitty does enjoy King hippo's company when kitty does though. Kitty's favorite boxer is definitely King hippo.
brick house: I don't have daily conversations with the men's league or anything. I chatted with them a couple times but nothing much. If I had to pick a favorite boxer it would be bear hugger.
Rockin Ry: I love talking with the men's league. A lot of them have such interesting things to talk about. I would say my favorite boxer is Soda popinski.
(on a separate note, I don't agree with puppet master :p))
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Walsh
PART ONE:
Warning: smut, violence, gore, breaking and entering, sarcasm. So much swearing. Mentions of Shane c*ck.
Kennedie Gunner was Lori’s best friend throughout high school as Shane was Rick’s best friend. The two often saw a lot of each other, more than Kennedie appreciated most days. She lived down the street a little ways from Rick and Lori, and visited every chance she got. She and Lori would spend nights together if Rick was pulling a double, as Lori never felt safe alone.
“Morning Kennie! Hey, Rick’s planning a little backyard barbeque if you’re interested.” Lori smiles as she pats the seat next to her. “You want to go grocery shopping with me?” She asks, flicking the list on the table.
“Sure!” The Gunner woman cheers, grabbing her small purse and leaving out behind Lori. Carl had gone to his friend’s house for the night, excited to kick off summer.
“So first stop is the liquor store. You want to make mimosas? Or?” The brunette asks as they drive towards town.
“Whatever you want. I’ll buy booze, Lo.” The blonde offers with a smile. Lori nods in acceptance because she knows Kennedie will fight dirty to the end. As they make a right, too busy talking that Lori forgets a turn signal, a police car lights the two up and Lori groans.
“Mornin’ ladies.” That voice could make Kennedie’s blood boil.
“Morning, Officer Walsh, Officer Grimes, what did I do?” Lori asks, rolling her eyes and giggling. Kennedie wasn’t giggling.
"Miss Gunner, you still look stunningly pissed off, as per usual.” Shane calls across to her, giving her a nod.
“And you still look like a douchebag, Walsh.” She snorts, rolling her eyes as she gives him a sarcastic smile.
“Always a pleasure, Ken.” He nods, pushing back his short curls.
“Yeah, never is.” She bites, flipping him the bird.
“Anyways, gals. I noticed you didn’t use a turn signal back there.” He drawls, and Lori giggles to Kennedie with a smile on her face.
“Jesus christ, Shane. Why don’t you go do some actual police work instead of hitting on your married partner’s wife!” She jabs, and Shane stalks to the other side of the car.
“Is that illegal drugs I smell?” He asks, popping open the door and unbuckling her. “Stop out of the car, ma’am. You don’t have any weapons or drug paraphernalia on ya, right?”
“No. I don’t, asshole.” She nips, letting Shane kick her ankles apart.
“Guess I’d better check, huh?” He asks, pushing his hands down her body roughly. A shiver breaks through her and she sucks in a breath. It doesn’t go unnoticed as he steps away. “Must be the smell lingering in the car, huh? You ladies have a great day. I’ll see y’all tonight.” He chuckles, sashaying back to the car like he hadn’t made the hair on her neck stand up.
“Bye Shane! Bye honey!” Lori calls as they head towards the store. “You two love to rile each other up. You get him going, then he gets you going; it’s hilarious honestly.”
“I can’t stand that awful man. He’s so fuckin’ annoying. He walks around like his penis could save the human race. News flash, buddy! It’s probably nothin’ special!” She berates as she heads into the store with Lori.
As she and Lori finish up dinner, she quickly jogs to the bathroom to change into shorts and a bikini top. Lori had said they’d swim if it killed them. The sweet brunette meets her at the sliding glass door in her bikini and two mimosas in her hands.
“Girl, yes.” She heaves, slipping a glass from her hand and taking a sip.
“Hey, so question. Rick and I were to vacation would you be okay to watch Carl? It’d only be a weekend. Rick wants to go away for our fifth anniversary but he wants a little escape.” Lori’s cheeks flame cherry red.
“I’d love to!” She cheers, patting Lori’s knee before they both find their way into the pool. Getting settled into some floats, sunglasses on, and mimosas in hand, the two women float around the pool.
“Fire in the hole!” Shane’s deep voice carries through the breezeway before he jumps off the deck, landing directly on her float and sending her careening into the pool, mimosa soaring through the air.
“Walsh!” She yells as she comes up for air. Swimming over to him, she grabs his neck and drives him under the water. He allows her to try for another minute longer before he physically stands up and drags her out of the water with him. As she huffs and tries to swim away, his finger expertly hooks her bikini top and tugs. As she starts to stand up, her breasts are on full display for him and she gives a shriek. “You are such a pig!” She cries, face flaming red from embarrassment as she scoops her top from the water and ties it on.
“Damn, why such a prude baby? That was probably the first time another man ever saw your tits!” He calls, mockinggly gripping at the air like a pair of breasts.
“Dammit Shane. You’re always such a bully.” Rick groans as Lori heads in after her.
“She’s just sore, that’s all. She’s too closed off.” Shane gripes as he sits with Rick to drink a beer.
“Either way, listen. Me and Lori are going away for our fifth anniversary, okay? And Kennie’s in charge of Carl, but will you just check up twice a day? Sometimes he gets to be a lot for one person, yeah?”
Shane’s eyes meet Rick’s and he snorts a little.
“Rick, she’s a grown woman.”
“Yeah, but you gotta at least watch the lights, man. Women can’t shut off lights. Also, go say sorry, man.” Rick jabs a lazy finger at the larger man who only chuckles in response.
“What? Nah, man. She’s a grown woman.” He laughs, taking another drink. Rick finishes dinner on the grill and the four adults sit down to eat in the dim glow of the sting lights.
“Sorry, Ken. I’m sorry for earlier. I did not know you were a sensitive little girl.” He snorts, she grabs a piece cheese and tosses it at him. He just laughs, snatching it and sticking it to her bare chest.
“Don’t you have ass waiting for you, Walsh?” She nips.
“Nah, you wanna be?” He licks his bottom lip and wiggles his brows at he.
“A comedian? That’s very impressive. A sheriff. An asshole. And a comedian. You must be a popular man at parties.” She nods, throwing her head back in laughter.
“That’s right.” He nods, giving her his big, gorgeous smile he used on other women, and for a millisecond, he thought he saw a flash of something more behind those sarcastic, rolling eyes.
“Alright. Well, I’m gonna head home you guys. Thank you for dinner! I’ll be over Thursday night then?” She asks as she rises from the table. Shane rises as well to Rick and Lori’s surprise.
“Can I walk you home? It’s dark.” He states, giving Rick a little smile.
“Are you really that much of a lightweight? No you’re not walking me home.” She nips, shoving him away as he steps closer to her.
“Good night, Kennie.” He coos, waving goodbye.
“Shut up, Walsh.” She grabs her purse and heads for the door. Lori does follow, giving her a big hug and offering to see her Thursday.
“Yeah, we plan on leaving Thursday night when Carl gets home from school.” Lori talks as she walks with her best friend out the door.
“Got it! I’ll pack my stuff then and see you guys Thursday!” She cheers as she heads down the street. A car circles her but drives away. Finding it odd, she grabs her pepper spray that Walsh had forced her to take a few years ago.
“Weird.” She states as she goes in and shuts the door. Turning on her alarm system, she double checks the windows before heading to bed.
Thursday morning comes and she packs her suitcase before loading into her car. Driving down the street to Rick and Lori’s, she pulls in behind Rick and Shane’s cruiser. A moment of realization hits when she sees Walsh in the passenger seat eating fries.
Ducking down under his view, she tries her best to hide but when she hears the door click open and shut she sits up and gives him her best unimpressed face.
“Good morning, you prude. What are you here so early for? Rick and Lori are probably gettin’ it on, so I might suggest not going in there. Unless you’re into that. We could have an orgy on the couch.” Shane wiggles his brows, giving her a stupid grin.
“I’m not orgying with anyone who tries to hit on me with ketchup on their face like a man child.” She laughs, shoving at him as she gets out and grabs her suitcase.
“Why do you hate me so much?” He asks as he slips the case from her hands and carries it to the door. Her hands go for the handle, but Lori’s greeting interupts her.
“I don’t hate you. Dislike? Oh yeah. Hate? Uhm, no.” She answers as Lori meets her at the door with a wild grin.
“Come in!” She cheers, swinging open the door. Shane snatches her suitcase and carries it in for her.
“Walsh? You okay?” She asks, looking to him with confusion written across her face.
“Yeah, why?”
“Because you’re being nice and I want to throw up.” Kennedie nips at him, raising her brows.
“Because the confused look on your face is worth it.” He snorts, dropping it onto the couch. A little black piece of lace sticks out so far that he hooks it with his index finger and gives her a wink.
“Shit, you wanna put ‘em on? Show me how they look?”
“Oh, Christ. Fuck off.” She barks, snatching the black panties from his finger and stuffing them into the bag before storming away from him. His laugh carries, egging her on. For a split second, Shane could imagine her in those black lace panties and his breath hitched.
“I guess Rick and I are gonna head out a little early since you and Shane are here. Shane offered to get Carl from school today and tomorrow. Didn’t you?” Lori asks with a very prominent nod.
“Yeah, I figured why not. Carl likes the cruiser better than your Honda anyway.” He prods, licking his lips again, hand running over his mouth and stubble. Of course Kennedie could tell what she was doing.
“I bet. I bet you use Carl to pick up girls on your way here too, don’t ya?”
“Yeah, it ain’t worked on you yet, you grannie.” He digs, winking at her before he tugs on his utility belt. “Some of us have to work, so. I’ll get Carl from school, try to be decent when we get back.” He prods, jabbing a finger at the lace panties still in her hand. “Carl doesn’t need to see that stuff.” Balling them up, she throws them at Shane, watching them hook onto a button on his uniform.
“Shut it, Walsh.” She nips, snatching her panties away once more before heading to the living room to put them in her suitcase.
“You two enjoy each other’s company! Thanks again!” Lori calls as she and Rick barrel out the door to their car.
“Enjoy your company? That’ll be the day.” She huffs, flipping on the TV to a music channel. Shane hadn’t noticed he was staring until she looks up from cleaning up the living room.
“Why do you hate me?” He asks softly, leaning his hip against the door jam as he cards through his thick, dark curls.
“Because you treat women like objects. They only need three essential things and none of them are a personality or a heart.” She offers as she puts the books on the shelf and stacks his toys in a bin.
“I’m not as bad as you think.”
“You left Rick’s christmas party last year with one of Lori’s friends. You left Fourth of July, broke Carl’s heart, because he wanted Shane to go to the fireworks with him, because of pussy. You left the Labor Day party for pussy. You left Carl’s fifth birthday for pussy. So I love that you’re trying to connect with me for some weird reason, but Shane? You only have one thing on your mind and I won’t be a notch in that stupid utility belt.” She states matter-of-factly as she wipes down the counter.
“You’re just jealous.”
“No I’m not and it pisses you off. You can’t get to me and it bothers you doesn’t it? I’m the one woman in the entire world who isn’t drooling over your dick.” She chuckles as she wipes down the couple dishes in the sink.
“I’m really not into you. Somewhere in that sick little mind you’ve created this fantasy that I’m in love with you.” He points to his own temple as if to signal she’s crazy.
“Oh sure, I did. I heard you hold your breath when you saw those black panties. Somewhere in that sick little brain of yours, you’re imagining what I look like in those. Don’t ya?” She asks, giving him a dirty smirk. Storming up against her, he gets in her face and she doesn’t back down.
“You bet. And all you think about is that Walsh dick. Right? You want some?” He growls, his body against hers.
“No thank you, Shane. But I appreciate the offer.” She coos, giving him a sweet smile before slipping past him. “Bye! See you in a couple hours!” She calls as he storms out the house.
As she hears a car pull in the driveway, she looks out to see Shane and Carl grinning and laughing, Carl’s face covered in blue around his mouth. Heading out the front door to greet them, a stern look as her arms cross over her chest.
“OH shoot. Run little man. Kennie’s mad!” He grabs Carl’s hand, trying to run away.
“You two get in here. Shane! He had ice cream?” She whines, waving to the blue stain around his mouth.
“It was only a little. We shared one scoop.” He offered.
“Carl, are you hungry for dinner? There’s enough for you too, Walsh.” She states as she leads Carl into the house and wipes off his face.
“You wanna wipe off my face too?” Shane calls. She just huffs, rolling her eyes as she sets a couple plates down.
“Are you eating?” She asks, eyes never leaving the chicken on the stove.
“Can I trust her cookin’?” He whispers loudly to Carl, catching her attention.
“Yeah. She’s a good cooker.” Carl assures in a loud whisper.
“A’right. I’ll stay.” He nods like he’s doing her a favor and sits at the table, unclipping his utility belt and hanging it over the chair. They eat in silence, not much to say.
“At school today, this girl told me that she thinks I’m cute. I told her what you say uncle Shane. Cute’s my middle name.” He giggles, “and then she kissed me on the cheek uncle Shane!” He cheers, earning a hand shake and a laugh from the large man.
“Oh that’s great, Walsh.” She chimes, giving him a dark look.
“Nice job.” He smiles, patting Carl’s head. Forking a chunk of chicken into his mouth, he moans at the delicious flavor and when she looks across to him confused he just nods to Carl, “you were right. Good cooker.” Shane nods, talking with his mouth full.
They finish their meal in quiet, Shane shooting Carl funny faces every now and again, making him giggle.
“Thanks for dinner.” He nods as he rises to his feet, scrubbing a hand down his jaw.
“No problem.” She smiles, grabbing the dishes up and heading to the sink.
“Hey Aunt Kennie?” Carl asks, looking to her as he brings his plate over in two little ketchup-covered hands. “Momma says you and uncle Shane won’t date a’cause you’re too stubborn. What does stubborn mean?” He asks, looking up holding his plate.
“Me and uncle Shane can’t date because he’s a womanizer, okay?” She explains, putting his plate into the sink with the other two. Shane coughs, drawing attention to himself. “What?” She asks very plainly.
“You can’t tell a five year old that his uncle is a womanizer.” He retorts.
“I just did.”
“What’s a womanizer?” Carl asks, looking to Kennedie for the answer.
“It’s when a guy treats women, not nice.” She improvises, deciding ‘like toys’ wasn’t the best answer.
“Oh, uncle Shane can’t be a woman fighter, he’s too nice. He changed an ol’ girl’s tire the other day.” Carl responds, holding out his hands to be washed.
“Not a woman fighter, hun, a womanizer.” She chuckles, looking over her shoulder to see Shane laughing softly to himself.
“Uncle Shane, are you taking me to school tomorrow?” Carl asks as she wipes away the ketchup from his hands and fingers.
“Sure, bud. I’ll be here at seven-thirty, okay?” He asks, crouching down to Carl level. Carl nods, hugging the officer before letting Shane rise to his feet and head to the door.
“See you in the morning, Walsh. And don’t be early. I’m not a morning person.” She nips, jabbing a finger at him.
“So six is good then?” He asks as he walks out the door and closes it behind him.
#shane walsh x oc#shane walsh#shane walsh fanfiction#walking dead#the walking dead#pre apocalypse#shane walsh pre apocalypse#shane walsh slowburn#shane walsh angst#jesus christ shane#sweet jesus tell me how to get these tags without typing all of them everytime.#shane walsh twd
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A few months ago I typed up some comments about the anime-only scene between Otogi and Honda on the blimp. Found here.
Well... now I'm here to talk about what happened before that scene. Because I read so much more into it.
Let's take a walk.
Please keep in mind that a great deal of this speculation comes from the belief that, despite Mr. Clown not being seen in the anime, he still exists and his relationship to his son is very similar. Also please keep in mind that this is all speculation from someone who has spent waaaayyyy too much time looking into everything Ryuji Otogi says/ does.
~~~
We join our heroes shortly after Yugi's Duel with Bakura. Ryou has fallen unconscious and the stab wound he sustained earlier has re-opened (unless you're watching the dub where blood doesn't exist.)
Otogi's first line comes after Shizuka has asked Kaiba to land the plane, and the camera cuts to her making a pose that demonstrates both uncertainty and discomfort. Kaiba stares at her and Honda and Otogi both get between them... to Honda's annoyance.
More on this in a second.
Kaiba ignores this and turns his attention back to Jonouchi and Yugi, telling them that it was Bakura's choice to Duel and that he will not be held responsible for the repercussions of another's mistake.
This causes Shizuka to shout (probably for the first time in her life.)
Otogi makes this face. Personally, I think it looks like a combination of surprise and concern. But why would he be concerned?
Because Shizuka is a lot younger, a lot smaller, and a lot less powerful (both physically and financially) than Seto Kaiba.
He is fearful of what Kaiba will do in retaliation, ans so.
He gets between Shizuka and Kaiba in hopes of transferring whatever Kaiba's about to do to him instead of her.
Because Ryuji Otogi is an abuse victim that knows what happens when you challenge someone bigger and more powerful than you. They put you back in your place.
Also Honda continues to not like this. Otogi is cutting him off each time he tries to speak, and while this could be seen as Otogi trying to one up Honda (and the dub absolutely took it that way) I can see it taken a number of ways. There's a chance he's trying to team up with Honda and hope that Kaiba won't start anything if it's two against one. It could also be that Otogi's not paying a lot of attention to Honda. He does see Shizuka and start moving in front of her before Honda moves into the frame the second time.
Going on a small tangent here but...
Keep in mind, Otogi stepped into a fight against four other guys and got himself involved in the fight against a cult to protect Honda and Shizuka. Sure, you can say that he did that to have a chance with her, but that's a lot of risk to have a chance with a girl he knows nothing about... especially for a guy who could have any number of girls with minimal effort. He will also shortly after this put up his own body as a gamble to protect Shizuka from a creepy old man that wants to wear her body like a suit. Personally, I don't think Otogi has any romantic feelings towards Shizuka at all, since each time they interact, he isn't so much flirting as he is trying to protect her. He treats Rebecca in a very similar way when he joins the duel between her and Varon under the assumption that Mai is also dueling, and that Rebecca will be outnumbered (and the correct assumption that a 12-year-old is about to pick a fight with a cult member who has the power to steal her soul. I've heard critiques that Otogi is very sexist because he won't let Rebecca nor Shizuka fight their own battles, which, yes, that's one way to take it... or you can take it as him stepping in when people significantly younger than even he is (Shizuka is 13) are put into incredible danger.)
That was lengthier than I meant for it to be, I'm sorry, back to the actual post.
So, despite everyone's best attempts, Kaiba's not landing this plane. Now get out.
Shizuka makes this face as they leave.
She's not having a good time.
Again Honda tries to talk to Shizuka and again Otogi cuts him off. He also grabs her hands and makes a very dramatic show of himself.
He makes this ridiculous face (that the dub skips because right after it, Shizuka blushes, and the dub really wants to portray Duke as the bad option in this love triangle. So we can't let it be known that she's happy he's doing this.)
This. This is not a face you use when you're trying to be suave and impress a girl. Heck, this is not a face we'll ever see him use again. We've seen him be suave and flirtatious, we know what it looks like, and folks, this ain't it.
To me, he knows he's being ridiculous and over-the-top. That's the point. He's trying to make Shizuka smile or at least stop making that face.
Now... this is where things take a turn.
Disclaimer: This might come across like I don't like Honda. I don't dislike Honda at all! It's just the nature of this scene.
Honda volunteers to go look for the Millennium Ring. Yugi agrees that they should all look. Honda says no, Jonouchi and Yugi should focus on their duels.
We cut to Otogi (still holding Shizuka's hands, I think she's okay now buddy you can stop) and he asks if Shizuka wants to help him search (he does not speak for her like he does in the dub.)
Honda insists Otogi come with him and very forcefully shoves/pushes Otogi away from Shizuka (who does, admittedly, look relieved.) When Otogi tries to protest that this isn't what he wants, Honda grabs his face to silence him.
This is not the first time someone has silenced Otogi by forcefully touching his face.
And this is not the expression of someone who is at all comfortable with the person touching him.
Honda then proceeds to drag a flailing Otogi away from the group while covering his mouth.
Otogi is doing everything in his power to communicate that he does not want this without being able to speak or break the guy's hold around his neck and no one is recognizing this as a sign of distress... or they are and they're just not stopping it. Heck, Jonouchi thinks Honda is being nice.
We can also see in this still that Honda's got a few inches on Otogi. Not a lot, Honda is 5'11 and Otogi is 5'8, but that's a considerable difference when you're intimidated.
Honda drags him to the top of the blimp and, while Otogi is looking about the blimp for the ring (what Honda claimed they were going up here to do) Honda stays still. Directly in front of the door. Blocking Otogi from being able to get away. (I can't post any more images in this post I'll have to rely on hyperlinks now.)
Otogi can't get away and he's been pulled away from the group. He is very aware this guy has a problem with him and can very easily overpower him.
So Otogi does what I've dubbed activates smug mode.
I'm going to make another post elaborating on activate smug mode (this one's long enough as it is) but, basically, Otogi only acts this way when he's trying to get the better of someone or when he's feeling threatened. He is also incredibly smug when he approaches his father to tell him that he lost to Yugi, knowing full well how his father will react to that news. It's a defense mechanism. Honda's taller and stronger than Otogi, all Otogi can really do is badmouth him and make him feel smaller in hopes that that will make Honda back off.
He then makes this pose.
I'm no body language specialist, but I worked as a counselor at a battered women's shelter for a while, so I was taught a few things.
1. He turns to his side. When you're intimidated by someone, you don't face them directly. You tilt your body away to give the illusion of distance, and to keep your vitals out of their direct reach.
2. He folds his arms in front of his stomach. Remember, Shizuka crossed her arms in front of her stomach when she was facing down Kaiba. Otogi is masking it a little by pointing and propping his elbow on his hand, but folding the arms over the chest or stomach remains a typical sign of insecurity/fear.
3. He is clutching his arm. This is something people do during severe bouts of anxiety in an attempt to ground themselves.
In conclusion, yes, Otogi sounds very confident and like he's egging Honda on. He sounds confident. Because that's the only thing he really has over Honda. Honda seems insecure about his appearance when compared to Otogi, thus why he gets deeply irritated whenever Otogi gets close to Shizuka. Otogi taps into that and uses it because it's his only defense in this situation. Maybe Honda will get fed up and leave to go lick his wounded pride.
It doesn't work. They throw hands. Well, Honda throws hands. Otogi stays in a very defensive stance the entire time. Fun fact: Keeping your arms raised close to your face and blocking your chest is one of the main stances in the more defensive based martial art of Tae-Kwon-Do.
In conclusion, my name is Axel and I think about this way, way, waaaay too much. I am of the belief that Otogi is very intimidated by Honda. I was going to attach images here of all the times Honda grabs Otogi's shirt/ threatens to punch him in the face but since I can't attach any more images and hyperlinks are a pain, I'll save it for another post. There are at least five instances.
No, I don't hate/dislike Honda, in fact, I'm pretty sure if Honda knew about Otogi's background, he'd feel terrible. The fact is they're both insecure teenage boys, Otogi because of his home life and Honda because of his family's social status and perhaps his lack of success as a duelist.
And... while I've thought about this scene a lot ever since posting that other post, I never realized how sad it makes me. Otogi's not hiding that he's not okay with being manhandled and dragged off, and his friends just sorta. Let it happen. Again, I don't blame any of them. Both Yugi and Jou have a lot on their minds and they don't seem to notice that this is a problem. Probably because 1. Honda and Jou are very physical/ playfully threatening people, that's just how they are. 2. No one knows about Otogi's homelife. They have no way of knowing he would have issue with any of this. They do it to one another all the time.
I have a lot of feelings.
Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.
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Tankie, Go Home
7/25/2020
By Stephen Jay Morris
©Scientific Morality
I have always been arrhythmic to the drumbeat of conformity. To Millennials, my outlook must be quite malapropos with respect to their conception of subjective reality. I wonder if there is a parallel universe, where other fears are concomitant to my fears. Maybe I’ll find out one day. Until then, it’s just the same old shit in the USA: this versus that. I just love the media. They make tons of cash selling this scenario of a national Apocalypse and a future dystopia: “Did you see those cute puppies in the Honda commercial?” No! I didn’t!
All my political life, I have stood in marked opposition to Conservatives, Nationalists and White Power creeps, rich Republicans, and other right wing scumbags. They hate me and I hate them. There is nothing original here—simply the normal arrangement of polemics and warfare. So, what is my point? Though my adversaries have consistently touted the Right wing side of life, my biggest challenge has been a dysfunctional family known as “the Left.”
Permit me to elaborate a bit more. According to imbeciles, we here on Earth are all unified and determined to destroy God’s favorite country, America. We are like programmed robots, marching to the directives of rich Jews, who finance and control us.
Uh…not really. What about the so-called Left? The Left can’t agree on what toppings to include on a Vegan pizza! Matter of fact, there are leftists who are as carnivorous as fuck, contrary to stupid Conservative stereotypes. Look at me: I am an Anti-Authoritarian Leftist who is monogamous to one woman. Yep, no free love for me. I am this way because of true love, not because of dictates by some God.
Since 1969, I have been hounded and belittled by comrades of the Authoritarian Left, and by the Anti-Authoritarians, as well. Why? Because I don’t fit in with their prescribed dogma and methodology of activism. I don’t say the right things and I don’t believe in New Age sensitivity. Back in 69, while part of my SDS chapter, Trotskyites mocked me because I didn’t fit in with their Marxist belief system. They ran the whole show! Ten years later, in 1979, my chapter of “Rock Against Racism” was almost seized by this weird Maoist cult, The Revolutionary Communist Party. During my stint with the Peace and Freedom Party, the Feminist Socialist faction didn’t like me because I was an Anarchist, and on and on and so forth.
The politically correct Droids of my past remind me of Orthodox Jews. According to them, they were the true representatives of the Jews. Other denominations of Jews, like Conservative and Reform, were heretics and heathens. The Orthodox followed Jewish laws and rituals perfectly. Their biggest adversaries were other Jews who didn’t follow their dictates. Instead of fighting Anti-Semitism or Islamic nationalists, they saved their raft for other Jews who violated the Sabbath! Once in Israel, Orthodox Jews threw rocks at beach goers because it happened to be the Sabbath. Yes, only the Orthodox Jew knows the true word of God!
The so-called Left—also known as the “Social Justice Warriors”--has the same orthodoxy. What is so sad is that the Right-wingers propagandize these politically-correct Droids as the true representatives of the Left. Not!
Sometimes, I wonder if these P.C. Droids are double agents of the corporate state. They spend a lot of time condemning other leftists for not conforming to their groupthink. But, these P.C. monsters are fascists to the core! “If you are a White man, then you are the evil demon that must acquiesce to the whims of the oppressed! You must self-flagellate and take responsibility for centuries of oppressing women, gays, and non-Whites!”
Sorry. I don’t accept that shit! P.C. Droids make the claim that White people will always be racist no matter how much they redeem themselves. Sort of like the “Original Sin” that practicing Catholics believe in. You see? I don’t sound like a conservative asshole in my criticism of Social Justice Warriors. I hate their views!
I never did like Black Nationalism or Black Separatism, either. Nor do I like street gangs or Gangster rap. Am I racist? Fuck no, I’m not! I do like Black Anarchists. Okay?
One thing I despise about the Authoritarian Left is that your language has to be perfect and not dare to say the wrong thing. Otherwise, you’ll be standing in front of a multi-racial, intersectional firing squad! What is worse than Black supremacy? Tyrannical Feminism! Back in the 80s, one famous Feminist, Andrea Dworkin, said that all men were rapists. Like the religious Right, she wanted to outlaw porn. I hated that (expletive deleted)! You know what? I could lose my job for uttering that sentence. But she deserved it, for making that sexist, fat shaming, and anti-Semitic remark. Free speech, baby! I’m glad she’s dead. Just kidding.
I am an anti-Authoritarian Jew and I am free. Well…I try to be. Note one Nestor Makhno, Ukraine Anarchist leader from 1919 to 1921. He fought the Right wing White Russian Army and the Left wing Red Army, simultaneously. If I have to do the same thing, I will.
If you dislike arguing or constantly debating, then don’t get involved with the Left. I got tired of it in the 90s and ventured forth on my own. And I haven’t looked back. I like being independent. A lot of people resent me for being so. To this very day, I am pelted over the Internet with anger and resentment for my unorthodox and iconoclastic views. Does it bother me? Does it bother me when a flea bites my ass? Yeah, it does.
#Tankie#american politics#leftist#political science#poets on tumblr#stephenjaymorris#anarchism#communism
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12, 13, and 14? ( Also how are you KP Dear?) ❤️💛
12. What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?
that ace/aro people ‘aren’t apart of the community’
13. What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?
the women *heart eyes*
14. What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?
FUCKIN EY LETS GO. i fucking hate lgbtq+ people walking with their corporations at pride. they lick so many boots their breath smells like rubber and it is disgusting. dont walk with starbucks or apple or honda or best buy. pride is a march, a statement, a parade, not a demographic that you can belittle *and* market off of. the lgbtq+ who march with them, in support of them, are excusing the behavior and aiding in the capitalistic motives when really pride should not be about making money. sns. PFlag? Fantastic. BLM? Fantastic. Even the lgbtq+ park rangers and paramedics (fuck the cops, die bastard scum and get tf away from pride) i love seeing and supporting, it’s the vile companies that amp us up during June and then turn around and endorse Tr*mp. It’s homophobic bullshit and tbh lgbtq+ if you are reading this and disagreeing, open your eyes tf up.in the same vein, i especially dislike lgbtq+ people who try to distance themselves from being labeled ‘gay’. like it’s dirty or bad or embarrassing. idk how many conversations i’ve had with people who experience sga or fall under the spectrum somehow, but turn around and put gay people down at every turn and distance themselves as much as possible from gay people/the community. idk if i explained that in a way that makes sense but yeah?
im alright dear! ty for asking :) im going to see my brother in rehab today so excited and nervous :)
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637
Random questions about your significant other. Yay I love these
What's their name? Y’all know the drill. Her name is Gabie. :) Are you dating, engaged, or married? We’re dating, because it’s too early to be getting into the other two just yet. How old are they? She’s 21. How long have you been together? It’ll be our fourth anniversary next month, but before that we also dated for eight months. When and how did you meet? It was in Grade 7, my friend and her friend were friends, so they introduced us to each other. We were a group of four friends for a while, but Gab and I ended up being the closest so we branched out. I took a liking to her because she was the only one in our batch who seemed to know about the fangirling culture, and I fucked with that lmao. Were you friends before you started dating? Yeah, super. We were each other’s best friends for a couple of years. She always says I’m one of the few people who understood her weirdness and quirks and rode along with it, and I can say the same for her with my own quirks. That really helped us become more close with each other.
- Beyond the basics - What did they have for dinner yesterday? We didn’t really have dinner. I know she had Chowking late in the afternoon, and then she met up with me in the evening and we had drinks out with friends. Sam’s uncle covered the food so we had grilled liempo, spicy hotdog, and isaw which technically was our pulutan, but I guess it counts as dinner too. What car do they drive? Her cars change all the time because of her dad’s business, but right now she alternates between a BMW (not sure which model) and a Toyota Vios. Where would they love to travel to the most? I don’t know, she hasn’t really expressed this with me. What is their favorite dog breed? She loves all dogs but I’m pretty sure her favorite breed is golden retriever. Are they more of a dog person or a cat person? She’s definitely more of a dog person, but she recently realized that she loooooves cats and that she’s a cat person as well. What do they do for a living? She doesn’t have a full-time job but I know she used to work at her dad’s company doing publicity materials for their social media, photography, working on Photoshop, etc. Not sure if she’s still doing the gig now since I don’t hear much of it from her these days. Have they ever worked two or more jobs at once? She juggled two executive positions in her two orgs a year ago, if that counts. What's their hair style/color? She used to have blonde tips but she chopped them off a few months ago, so now she’s back to just having her normal, wavy, black hair. Name some of their favorite foods. Chicken pesto pasta, potato chips, and anything her dad cooks? I’m not sure about that last one, but generally I never trust her with having ‘favorites’ because hers changes every single day. What would they consider to be their greatest accomplishment? I’m gonna take a wild guess and say that it was when she scored a 100% scholarship at her present university. The tuition there per year is around P200K but thanks to her hard work and good grades her parents have never had to pay a single cent for her studies. How many cousins do they have? I know she has... a lot but they’re either too old (almost like her aunts and uncles) or live in the States. Her mom is the youngest among her siblings and all of them were already pretty grown-up when she came around; and her dad’s siblings live in the States, hence most of her cousins living there as well. Where did they go to elementary/primary school? She went to the same school I did. We met in Grade 7, or I think what you guys refer to as ~middle school. What's their highest level of education? We’re both in university but graduating this year. How many times have they moved? I’m only aware of the one time she moved, and I’ve also already been to that previous house. If there were any other periods that they moved houses, she hasn’t told me about them. (If married/living together) How many times have you two moved together? Do they have a celebrity look-a-like? She told me that her grandmother used to tell her she looked like Brooke Shields when Brooke was younger, but that was many years ago. Nowadays I hype her up cos she shares a resemblance with Gal Gadot, heh. Do they talk in their sleep? Sometimes. Usually it comes out as gibberish mumbles, but there are times she’d say actual words so for almost four years, I’ve kept a list of all the stuff she’ll say in her sleep. Some of the funnier/more interesting entries include “hot math,” “my knees are still stuck,” “I’m going to shate,” and simply “mutts.”
Have they ever had braces? Yes. We started wearing braces at around the same time but she had to keep hers on longer than I did. What size shoe do they wear? Her feet can fit in either a size 5 or 6. Do they have a good relationship with their parents? Yes. I’ll sometimes confide in her about how lucky she is and about how I wish we had the same set of parents, especially whenever I’m upset with mine. Her parents were very busy with work when she was younger so she wasn’t able to spend a lot of time with them then, but as time passed they were able to catch up and now she has a healthy relationship with both. At what age did they get their drivers license? 18. What was their first car? She changes her car every few months so she’s gone through A LOT and it’ll be hard for me to remember her first...but I’m gonna take a wild-ass guess and say her first was either like a blue-green Toyota Corolla or something similar, or a red Honda CRV. What were they wearing the last time you saw them? Plain gray t-shirt and black jeans. What was their first word? No clue. We’ve never talked about this. Are any of their grandparents still living? She has one living grandmother. What sort of books do they like to read? She’ll read anything I think, but right now she’s into coming-of-age stuff because of the last book she read. What was the last book they read, or are currently reading? ^ That. HAHAHA she didn’t tell me the title or delve too much into the book with me, but yeah it was coming-of-age and she ended up loving it. Do they wear a watch? Sometimes. Most of the time she doesn’t. Do they smoke? Yes. For a long time, I told her not to just cos I found it disgusting, but eventually I realized I can’t prohibit her from doing what she wants to do the whole time we’re together; so I slowly came to terms with her smoking so I just let her. I don’t know if it’ll be a habit of hers but I do know she does it socially. Do they drink? Yes. Are they more introverted or more extroverted? Definitely an extrovert; she can jive with anybody. What was their last reason for going to a doctor? She had a bad asthma attack so she needed to have an IV thing pricked on her for a few hours. What are some of their pet peeves? She HATES moochers, like those who ask for free stuff all the time hahaha I know this because we have a friend who shamelessly does this. She also dislikes freeloaders, laziness, and being scolded especially for something that isn’t her fault. What are some of their fears? On the shallow side, I know she’s scared of horror movies, driving at night, and having to kill cockroaches. But she’s generally a deep person ehhffdrjfld and I know that more than anything, she’s terrified of failing and of the future. What are some of their bad habits? She’s super forgetful but I think it’s endearing. Hmmm she overworks herself a lot, and overthinks as well. What are some of their talents? She’s amazing at writing, creating videos, shooting short films, doing tricks on the balisong, acting, and fixing everything I’ve ever broken haha. What's their favorite amusement park? I’m not a big amusement park person so we haven’t been to any, but I think she likes Disneyland? Have they ever broken a bone? I don’t think so. Which do they tend to remember more - names or faces? Neither. What are their religious beliefs? Or are they not religious? She’s agnostic. She believes there must be something or someone out there that caused the universe and why everything in it has happened so seamlessly, but she is in no pressure to find out who or what it is. Have they ever volunteered anywhere? To my knowledge, she has not. What's their favorite season? I dunno, we only have two. What sports have they played? Basketball and softball. What musical instruments have they played? Guitar and ukulele. What is a cause they feel strongly about? Women’s rights, and women in general. What's their ancestry? She’s Turkish on her mom’s side, but other than that she’s Filipino. Which do they prefer - coffee or tea? Coffee. Do they believe in astrology? Ugh. Yes. Are they more of a night owl or a morning person? Night owl.
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a little bit o’ spring anime season retrospective, a little late 👇
I’ve only watched 2.5 series involved in the Isekai Quartet but I was thirsty for Re: Zero content so I tuned in to this. I’mma be honest: this was fun. Crossovers are fun. I really enjoyed seeing funny skeleton man and Goddess of Dumbass interact, and I think equal time and attention was given to all parties involved, and that made it fun, too. It was accessible for someone like me whose knowledge of these shows was only tertiary and even if it had its questionable moments (Darkness I hate you so much), the sum is an enjoyable package. I question if this show could work with any other quartet of isekai heroes because all other isekai protagonists are boring af.
Watching Fruits Basket again makes me realize that I absorbed too much of Tohru Honda into my personality when I was impressionable and wee and never figured out that it was bad. Anyway this was a nice new coat of paint on a beloved series. The updated designs are nice to look at and the care given to the new material is evident. But it is considerably less…fun than the first incarnation and can I be honest? As a manga reader, knowing what I know about how the little love triangle pans out and watching it from the beginning? I just don’t like Kyo like I did when I was 12. Which, uh, wasn’t that much to begin with. Tohru deserves the world and the anime has a lot of work to do to convince me that Kyo can give that to her.
Fairy Gone takes its place alongside The Lost Village for being the biggest waste of time. In its favor: I liked the main character’s design and that she wore pants. Its sins: horrible clunky CGI I could not make out, way too many proper nouns, infodumps every episode, butt rock, a general disinterest in its main cast and their secrets. It expected me to care about a bunch of stuffy old men and their machinations when there were friends-to-enemies girlfriends in the background they weren’t even considering. I don’t remember who the assistant attorney general prime minister of Not-England is and I don’t care. The fact that this gets another 12 episodes is baffling, how anyone could anyone listen to another 12 episodes of dull political cud-chewing is beyond me.
Carole and Tuesday makes La La Land look like a plastic bag tumbling underneath a highway. Carole and Tuesday should win the Oscar for best everything. Carole and Tuesday is the best contemporary musical by a mile. Watanabe has been waiting 25 years just to make this show, and it’s a delightful cross section of everything that’s made his shows successful in the past—the slice of life futurepunk of Cowboy Bebop, the zaniness of Space Dandy, the ensemble cast of Samurai Champloo. It’s a pleasure to watch. I love seeing these girls underestimated and then blow everyone out of the water, it’s a consistent delight. The soundtrack is amazing and everything on it sounds genuine and legitimate—probably because it is. Netflix shouldn’t be keeping this one all to itself.
Hitoribocchi was a sweet little gem of goodwill. Strange, anxious Bocchi’s quest to make friends with her equally strange classmates was funny, empathetic, and endearing. I love this cast of weirdo misfits and who among us doesn’t secretly hope their friends don’t forget about them when they’re sick oh thank goodness it’s not just me.
Senryuu Shoujo was a little cute, a little funny, a little heartwarming. It’s forgettable but a nice kind of forgettable, where you fondly remember it for five minutes and then move on with your life. It’s a short form series so if you’re in the mood for a quick n’ light shoujo about pining and misunderstanding, this is an easy recommendation.
I think I set my expectations too high for Sarazanmai. I wanted it to be the takedown of yaoi tropes like Yurikuma so gleefully pitchforked yuri tropes, but that wasn’t its project at all. It was Ikuhara’s most visceral work, but also, I feel, his most grounded in reality, which is a weird fucking thing to say about a show wherein three boys turn into kappas to go up the concept of someone’s butt. This was, decidedly, my least favorite Ikuhara title, which isn’t to say it’s bad. It’s just not Penguindrum or Yurikuma. Its scope felt smaller, its commentary less biting, its reveals less….revealing. Stand By Me is a bangin’ ED, though, I will Stand By That.
Kono Oto Tomare suffers from not knowing who its main character is. Surely it’s Megane Senpai, who starts the show off? But it’s not, it’s most assuredly Delinquent Guy, who is the emotional heart of the show and who definitely has something going on with our third main character, Prodigy Girl, leaving Megane Senpai the third wheel. This show just doesn’t start with its feet underneath it—it hobbles along an ungainly fusion of shoujo and sports anime and doesn’t do either tremendously. It does, however, have a heart, and this cast did eventually grow on me and I want to see them succeed. Protip: if your show is about an activity, please feature the activity. There is very little actual koto playing in this show and this is one of its biggest missteps. It’s a serviceable show, but not a great one.
I don’t drop a lot of anime but I dropped Cinderella Nine at episode 5 because it was just too ugly. It was so bad that I began to doubt there was an “on model”. There was just nothing going for it—the character designs were awful, the animation would pass as a power point, and the sportball was nonexistant. Non Non.
Dororo really let me down. I didn’t care for its ending at all, and in fact, sort of felt as if it nullified all the hard work of the prior 23 episodes. Having Dororo and Hyakkimaru part is a terrible decision. Nothing was learned. The payoff was not rewarding. Would have to point to Aldnoah to find an ending in recent memory I disliked more than this one. >:(/10
The show I was most hyped for every week was Demon Slayer. It didn’t start out swinging—Tanjiro’s origin story is unfortunately pretty par for the course in terms of shonen heroes, and the years-long training arc and time skip right after it was not the most inviting beginning. In fact, that’s where I dropped the manga when I tried reading it a couple of years ago. But ufotable makes this serviceable and by the fourth episode or so, I was completely sold. Something I loved about the manga was its unique artstyle and use of patterns and gradients—any other studio would have sacrificed both. Watching a fight scene in Demon Slayer is a joy. Characters ping pong around each other and footwork is fancy and weapons feel dangerous and the techniques look cool and require Tanjiro to puzzle them out. Also, Tanjiro is such a good boy. He drinks so much respect women juice. Every time an episode ends I’m disappointed I don’t have more to watch.
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