#woman lit house 7 dead

[rosielou94]

Special Someone - Gilly Lopez - Reader

A/N: I think Gilly is such an underrated character and there aren't many fics about him, so here's the start a new series I've got planned.

Warnings: Angst, friends to lovers (kind of), Reader is full of self-doubt, Reader cheated on by ex.

Words: 2,017

Your eyes were red from crying, your mouth numb from the pint of ice cream you’d forced down yourself in an attempt to cheer yourself up, and the episode of Friends where Ross drinks all the margaritas was playing on your TV. Usually, this episode had you laughing out loud, but today you weren’t finding much funny.

The call had come about 2 hours earlier, your ex telling you he was ending things. You felt so stupid, you’d seen this coming from a mile away when he started pulling away, dropping out of dates last minute and being extra secretive with his phone. “Who is she?” you’d asked her, your throat tight with tears you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of shedding. “You don’t know her,” he said, the smile on his face visible in his voice. He was enjoying this, the sick fuck. Everyone had warned you about him, but you were so tired of being alone, you forced yourself to believe he was a good man. He didn't even have the decency to break up with you face to face! You heard the laughter of a woman in the background, the sound of lips against skin. This son of a bitch! You ended the call there and then, not needing to hear what happened next.

You blamed yourself, really. You knew what he was like, but all your friends from high school were getting married and starting families, and you were still renting a tiny apartment owned by an old college roommate’s uncle, approaching your 30’s and painfully aware your biological clock was ticking. Your ex had been handsome, and charismatic, and he’d promised you the world, and you stupidly believed him. Maybe you’d just get a couple of cats, resign yourself to the life of a spinster and take up knitting. This failed relationship was the last in a very long line and you were tired of being taken advantage of.

Just as you were hauling yourself off the sofa for more ice cream, your phone lit up, and Gilly’s name popped up. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself as you saw the goofy picture of him that you’d set as his profile picture flash across your phone screen. You could do with hearing a friendly voice. “Hey Gilly” you said, you voice hoarse from crying. “What’s up? Has something happened?” Gilly’s concerned tone was evidence of how well this man knew you. Certainly, better than you knew yourself. “Nothin’,” you lied, “I was just napping. How’re you?” “You’re a liar, but sure,” Gilly could read you like a fucking book. “You still coming to the party tonight?” Shit! You’d completely forgotten about the cook-out at the Club House tonight. You’d told Gilly you’d go weeks ago, but now as you sat in your ice-cream stained pyjamas, your face red and puffy from crying, you didn’t feel like partying. “Oh, umm…” you racked your brain, thinking of an excuse to use. “Great!” Gilly didn’t give you time to bail out, sensing you needed this night as much as the MC did. “I’ll pick you up at 7.” The line went dead, and you let out a loud sigh. Guess I’m going to a party.

At 7pm on the dot, Gilly turned up at your apartment. This man was impeccable with his time keeping. You were still running around your apartment with one Doc Marten on, trying desperately to find the other. Your green satin dress already had a stain on from the glass of wine you’d poured yourself while you were getting ready, and God knows where your leather jacket was. Gilly watched you with amusement from the doorway. He’d already spotted your Doc Marten half sticking out from underneath your sofa, and your leather jacket was crumpled underneath the dozen scatter cushions you had stacked on your armchair. Stepping forward, he grabbed the shoe and jacket, pressing them gently into your hands. “Just breathe,” he smiled, taking in your flushed appearance. You thought you looked a mess, but to Gilly, you looked beautiful. Hell, you could be wearing a potato sack and he’d still think you were the most beautiful woman. He could tell from the empty ice-cream pots, and the fact that Friends was playing on the TV that something had happened, and he would bet money that it had to do with that dickhead of a boyfriend. You were too good for that waste of space, and Gilly wanted nothing more than to take the piece of shit far out into the desert where no one would find him. But he cared about you too much to do anything like that. He’d peacefully said his part when you first got together with the sleazebag, but he knew that saying or doing anything more would just push you away. Your shoe on and your jacket slung over your shoulders, you puffed out a breath of air and smiled. “Ready. Sorry for the delay.” “You look amazing. It’s gonna be a good night, ok?” Gilly affectionately kissed the top of your head and handed you a spare bike helmet. “Let’s go.”

As you rode through the streets of Santo Padre, the warm summer air blowing your hair in tendrils behind you, your arms gripped round Gilly’s waist, you couldn’t help but notice the strength of this man. He smelled of cologne, leather and fresh laundry and you relaxed against his broad frame, feeling content. Pulling into the Club House, the party was already in full flow, the smell of BBQ wafting through the warm evening air. Your stomach grumbled, despite the 400 pints of ice-cream you’d consumed that afternoon, and you were already eyeing up the burgers Riz was flipping. Gilly pressed a beer into your hand and held out a chair for you. He sat down next to you, his hulking frame barely fitting in the camping chair. “You wanna talk about it?” He asked quietly, taking a swig of beer. “We broke up,” you whispered, your voice cracking with emotion. “I knew it was coming.” A choking sob escaped you and quickly took a gulp of your beer, refusing to cry again. “I was an idiot,” you mumbled, picking at a loose thread on your dress. “No.” Gilly shook his head firmly. “The only idiot is that asshole. You’re funny, and smart, and kind, and so beautiful. You were way too good for that guy.” “You think so?” You smiled, looking up at your friend. His eyes were so kind, his smile so broad and genuine. He pulled you in close, planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. “I know so.” Gilly laughed as your stomach let out an all-mighty rumble again. “Come on, let’s grab you some food before you die of starvation.”

A few hours later, Gilly watched you and Letty chatting around the fire pit. You were laughing hard, your cheeks flushed from the heat of the fire and the beers you’d been drinking. You looked so happy, so carefree, and Gilly wished you could always be this way. You had demons; hell, everyone at this fucking party did, but Gilly so badly wanted to take them away. You didn’t deserve any of the shit that had happened to you over the years and seeing you smile was the sweetest thing. “Close your mouth and quit staring. You look like a fucking predator.” Bishop clipped Gilly round the ear, knocking him from his trance. “Nah man-,” Gilly started, embarrassed he’d been caught out. “Just go talk to her,” Bishop said, his arm around the waist of a girl who’d been trying to get Gilly’s attention for most of the night. After numerous failed attempts to seduce him, she’d moved on to Bishop, who’d only been too happy to pick up the pieces. Spurred on by the many drinks he’d had that night, and a good hard shove in the back from Bishop, Gilly headed over to you.

“Hey, you having a good night?” Gilly approached you, his palms sweaty, feeling like a nervous teenager. He aways felt like this around you; giddy, but scared shitless in case he made a fool of himself. “Hey,” you stood up and pulled him into a hug, “thank you for making me come tonight. It’s been really great, and I feel so much better.” Gilly’s heart swelled as you spoke, pulling you in for an even tighter hug. You squealed as he span you around, your feet lifting off the floor in the process. He set you back down, the both of you breathless and laughing. “Can I talk to you for a second?” he said, resisting the urge to move the strand of hair that had that had stuck itself to your lip gloss. “Sure, is everything ok?” You looked at him quizzically as you headed to a quiet spot away from the party. Gilly grabbed you both another beer, cracking the top off one and handing it to you. You stood under one of the street lights, the fluorescent bulb basking your hair and face in an orange hue. Gilly took in your full lips, the way that satin dress hugged your perfect curves and knew he had to say something, to tell you how he felt before the moment had gone. He couldn’t risk losing you again. But he also knew that you needed time to find yourself, to figure out who you were and what you wanted. Gilly would never pressure you into anything you weren’t 100% comfortable with, but he’d spent years loving you from a distance and tonight he needed to tell you. Thank God the shot of tequila he’d done earlier was starting to take effect.

“Listen, I gotta tell you something.” Gilly rubbed the back of his neck and looked up at the star filled sky, wondering where to begin. You were looking at him questioningly, but you stayed silent as he searched for the right words. “Gilly,” you laughed nervously when he still didn't speak, “you’re freaking me out.” “When you told me you’d broken up with that dickhead, I was so happy, I can’t put it in to words,” Gilly said, “he was such an asshole, and that fire that you have in your eyes, it was gone when he was around. I was happy that he couldn’t hurt you anymore, that he couldn’t make you feel worthless anymore, but I was happy too because…” he paused, searching for the right words. “I was happy because every moment I spend around you is so incredible, I never want it to end. You’re amazing, you’re so special and you deserve to find someone just as special.” “Gilly,” you whispered, your eyes bright with tears. You gently squeezed his arm and when he spoke next, his voice was thick with emotion. “I care about you, a lot. I’ve spent so many years watching you fight your way through whatever shit is thrown at you. You’re so strong, you’re stronger than you know, and I admire the hell out of you. I think you should take time, get to know yourself again, and heal from what that asshole did to you. But when you feel up to it, I’d love to take you out on a date.” Gilly was breathless, from nerves and adrenaline, trying to get a read on your face. You were usually like an open book, but right now he couldn’t tell what the fuck you were thinking. Your eyes searched his, a single tear running down your cheek. You wiped it away and held your hand against this cheek, his beard scratchy under your soft palm. “I’d like that,” you smiled, taking his hand in yours and squeezing it. Gilly, your gentle giant. He’d been in front of you all along. You were both smiling at each other, neither wanting the moment to end, but not sure what to do next.

Eventually, Gilly slung his arms around your shoulder, leading you back to the party. He took one last look up at the night sky with its millions of shining stars and hoped that one day, maybe, he could be your Special Someone.

[lesbianboyfriend]

can i ask for lesbian book recommendations 🥹🕺

yeassss ofc my love <3

erm and obligatory disclaimer for any who might read that i don’t think “queer” or “lesbian” is a necessarily coherent category of books or adequate descriptor for a novel which is why i’ve also provided the actual genres here (sorted into which ever one i felt best fit) and descriptions. and these books have much more going on than just being about lesbians. however all books are undeniably awesomer with lesbians so yayyyyy

FANTASY:

-the salt grows heavy by cassandra khaw: fantasy horror; murderous mermaid and plague doctor come across a cult of children (could be read as not lesbians bc one character is nonbinary but i choose to read as. lesbians)

-the empress of salt and fortune by nghi vo: political fantasy; monk unravels the tale of exiled empress’ rise to power

-when the the tigers came down the mountain by nghi vo: political fantasy; monk unwinds the tale of a tiger and her scholar lover to prevent other tigers from eating them (stand alone sequel to empress of salt and fortune)

-ship of smoke and steel by django wexler: ya fantasy; girl has to steal a ghost ship to save her sister’s life

-the mermaid, the witch, and the sea by maggie tokuda-hall: ya fantasy; pirate falls in love with one of the ship’s hostages, a girl being sent to an arranged marriage against her will

-tremontaine created by ellen kushner: political fantasy; there’s a lot going on in this one okay just trust me that it’s really good esp if you love political intrigue (this was released serially and is easiest to acquire an electronic version)

-the deep by rivers solomon: fantasy/spec fic; African slave women thrown overboard gave birth to mermaid-esque descendants. one holds these traumatic memories for her whole people and must grapple with that pressure

-wild beauty by anna-marie mclemore: ya magical realism/fantasy; a family of women who can create flowers and whose lovers always tragically vanish fight to keep their land and to unravel the mystery of a strange boy who appeared

-siren queen by nghi vo: historical magical realism/fantasy; girl’s rise to stardom amidst the monsters of hollywood back in the days of the studio system

-gideon the ninth by tamsyn muir: sff; um. how to explain briefly. gideon wants nothing more than to leave the ninth house, but her nemesis harrowhark needs her sword skills to pass the emperors trial and become immortal. sure. (caleb i know you’ve read this just adding for any other viewers yayyy)

HORROR:

-white is for witching by helen oyeyemi: horror fantasy/magical realism; a house with women in its walls calls to miranda silver while the people she leaves behind struggle to make sense of what happened to her

-plain bad heroines by emily a. danforth: historical horror; when filming a movie about the macabre history of a boarding school, its past starts to become the reality for the stars and author of the novel it’s based on

LITFIC:

-girl woman other: contemporary litfic; the intersecting stories of Black british women told in verse

-nightwood: classic literary; i feel like i can’t describe this one well but nora and jenny are obsessed with robin, whose penchant for wandering and inability to commit drives them crazy. toxic dyke drama at its best

-the thirty names of night: lit fic; transmasc syrian american unravels the history of artist laila z who encountered the same rare bird his mother saw right before her death and realizes their pasts are intertwined

-under the udala trees: historical lit fic; coming of age set against the backdrop of civil war in Nigeria, two girls from different ethnic communities fall in love

-everyone in this room will someday be dead: contemporary lit fic; that moment when your ocd lands you a job at the catholic church even though you’re an atheist and also your relationship is falling apart

-stone butch blues: historical lit fic; butch lesbian realizing and grappling with her identity throughout the 40s-70s

-the color purple: classic lit fic; story of two sisters separated in their youth—one is forced into an abusive marriage and falls in love with her husbands mistress, wondering what became of her sister

-oranges are not the only fruit: semi-autobiography with slight fantasy elements; exploring growing up lesbian in a deeply religious pentecostal sect

SCI-FI:

-the weight of the stars: ya sf romance; aspiring astronaut is forced into friendship with a girl who waits on the roof every night for radio signals from her mother in space

-the seep: sci-fi/spec fic; what if aliens invaded and formed a hive mind of everyone and also your girlfriend turned into a baby again. wouldn’t that be fucked up

-the stars are legion: political science fiction; an awakes with no memory amid a group of people calling themself her family who claim she is the only one who can save their world

-not your sidekick: ya sci-fi; superheroes are real and they fucking suck

SHORT STORIES:

-sarahland: contemporary/spec fic short story collection; various stories about people named sarah

[walker-bait-1973]

8 Years Part One

Photo Edit by Me

A Daryl Dixon/ Sybil Tremont Fanfiction (Daryl x OC)

Background information: It’s assumed the reader knows the world of TWD. This Fanfic takes place after Alexandria, Hilltop, Oceanside, and the Kingdom are established and at the height of success. Carl is dead. The communities are bound by a doctrine created by Michonne. Rick is presumed dead. Daryl and Michonne never lost hope and searched for several years for Rick without luck. Daryl had a short relationship with Leah. The Saviors disbanded with Negan in a jail cell in Alexandria. The Whisperers have been defeated, and Lydia is a valued member of the Hilltop homestead.

18+

Daryl x OC (Female)

Warnings: Violence, Alcohol, Slow Burn, Fluff, Smut

Part Two

Master List

Chapter 1: Caramel

The summer of 1990 was a record-breaker for heat. The sun shone brighter than ever by early June. While people around Atlanta were finding ways to keep cool, Merle Dixon along with his younger brother Daryl, and their motorcycle gang pulled into the local 7-11 to get some ice-cold brews. They were headed to Pine Lake for a party. Merle and two of his buddies went inside for drinks.

“Hey Merle, get some snacks too!” Daryl yelled after him. Merle shot him the middle finger, laughed, and went inside. Daryl lit up a cigarette. As he listened to the group talking and laughing, a small group of young ladies walked past them. Daryl’s attention averted to have a gander at these five women. One, in particular, stood out to him. She was a curvaceous woman, with an ample chest, wide hips, and thick thighs. Her long ebony curls bounced in a neat ponytail as she walked in flip-flops with painted red toenails. She was wearing a pair of cut-off blue jean shorts that hugged her apple-shaped bottom. Her skin was a delicious shade of caramel, tanned from the hot sun no doubt. Her red halter top complimented the shade well. As she passed him he said, “Hot day.”

She nodded curtly, eyeing the pale-skinned man in the grey tank top as her friends giggled and they went into the store. She stopped for a moment to look over her shoulder at him, “You better watch yourself, you’re gonna get burned.”

He smiled slyly and playfully smacked Terry in the chest as the automatic door swung shut, “damn!”

“She’s outta your league, Daryl.” Terry chuckled as Daryl rubbed his dirty blonde goatee. He was already plotting what to do next.

“Naw… she ain’t.” He took a breath before heading into the convenience store himself. Terry looked at Buck and sniggered.

Inside, Daryl could hear Merle’s loud voice back by the beer cooler laughing with Sam and Joe. He casually walked down one aisle with low shelves, spying on the girls over by the Slurpee machine comparing flavors. He paused by the snacks and perused the various chips, raising his eyes often to watch the girls as they laughed and poured themselves the thick icy beverage. He glanced back praying his brother wouldn’t come up while he made his move. He walked to the girls and said, “Hey, ‘s y’ flavor?”

“Caramel” sucked slowly on her straw before saying, “Cherry.” A pair of large green eyes framed with long lashes lifted to look at him. He felt his insides turn to mush, as a boyish grin crossed his face.

He followed her outside and as she started walking away with her friends he called out, “’s yer name?”

Looking over her rounded shoulder, “Sybil.”

From that moment on, he was hooked.

Chapter 2: The Receipt

Alexandria

Daryl rolled over, restless in his bed. He heard footsteps thudding on the basement ceiling. Judith and RJ must be over for breakfast. He sat up, Dog instantly licking his face.

“Down, boy…” he grunted. Dog jumped to the floor and waited patiently by the back door for his morning walk. Daryl shirked into some clothes, donned his boots, and opened the door. Dog ran out into the dew-covered grass behind the house to do his duties. Daryl whistled,  beckoning for Dog to join him as he walked down the road toward the Alexandria main gate.

Rosita and Aaron were up on the platform, keeping watch for possible trouble.

“Good Morning, Daryl!” Aaron called out. Daryl waved quietly and moved along, toward the community center where many of the residents chose to eat together. He walked in, nabbed a fresh loaf of bread, and returned to Carol’s house.

“Good morning Uncle Daryl!” Judith exclaimed running to him as soon as he closed the door.

“Mornin’ Jude,” he answered as she hugged him around the waist. He put his arms around her shoulders and hugged her in return. RJ joined them and gave Daryl a high five.

“Come on, Judith… RJ… let’s get you fed before classes.”

“Y’ heard Aunt Carol… c’mon and get to the table.” Daryl grabbed a knife and started cutting up the bread for toast. Carol served the kids fresh scrambled eggs, apple slices, and orange juice. They munched on the yummy food while Carol poured Daryl his first cup of coffee. He leaned against the counter sipping it, his mind wandering.

He went weeks before he saw Sybil again. This time, she was at a grocery store as a cashier. What luck Daryl had! He spotted her immediately as he carried the armloads of food to the register. He decided to go through her line, affording him a great opportunity to talk to her again.

“Have a nice day,” she was saying as she handed the receipt over to the customer in front of him.

He scratched the back of his neck as she started cashing him out, “find everything you were looking for?” She lifted her eyes, a smile on her face, dimples adorning her cheeks.

“Naw…”

“No? Is there something I can help you with?”

“Sure. Y’all could give me y’ number.”

She chuckled, “You’re mighty confident.”

“’ Member me?”

“Not sure that I do,” she replied, toying with him. There was no way Sybil could forget those deep-set blue eyes and that handsome face.

“I can make it so y’ never f’get me again.” He leaned on the conveyor belt, stopping it.

“Oh yeah?”

There was a line forming behind him.

“You’re right I’ll never forget you if you get me fired,” she feigned being cross.

“Give me y’ number an’ I’ll pay m’ total.”

“I don’t even know your name,” she said, “that will be twenty-eighty-seven.”

He pulled out thirty bucks. When she returned his change, she handed him his receipt.

“Daryl. M’ name’s Daryl.”

She smirked, “have a nice day, Daryl.”

He grabbed his bag, frowning. As he put his change in his pocket, he realized she’d written a phone number on the back of the receipt.

She winked at him and started on her next customer’s order.

“… Daryl?”

Daryl looked up from his mug at Carol, “Huh?”

“I asked what your plans were for today. Where were you just now?”

He shook his head, “Nowhere. ‘M thinkin’ of takin’ a ride t’ Hilltop.”

“Yeah? If so, could you take a few things for me? I made Maggie some curtains for Hershel’s room in the Barrington House, and there are some parts that Eugene needs for the radio.”

He shrugged, “Yeah, get t’ stuff t’gether n’ I’ll take it w’ me.”

He took a plate of eggs and set it on the floor for Dog.  Dog chowed down while Daryl munched on a piece of toast.

“Alright, go get washed up and Uncle Daryl will walk you to school on his way out.”

“Okay,” Judith looked at her younger brother, “get your stuff.”

Once Daryl delivered the kids to class, he and Dog ambled to the gate where Carol was waiting for him. He shouldered his pack and strapped the box of things to take down on his motorcycle. Carol squeezed his shoulder, “You have a safe trip, okay? Tell everyone I say hello. Oh, and I nearly forgot. Judith wrote Hershel a letter.” She slipped it into his hand. Daryl smiled.

“I’ll make sure he gets it.”

Chapter 3: Lending A Hand

Hilltop

Daryl sped into Hilltop, Dog in tow, and parked close to the barn. He got several waves from various community members and was warmly greeted by Maggie. She wrapped her arms around him for a big hug, “Been a long time, stranger,” she remarked, squeezed his shoulder, and knelt to pet Dog.

“Too long,” Daryl confessed, nodding in acknowledgment toward Jesus and Tara.

“Damn right it’s been too long,” Tara piped up, “tell us, what’s everyone been up to?”

“Y’ know,” he shrugged, “same old. Ain’t much t’ tell.” He patted his jacket pocket, “Got somethin’ f’ Hershel though.” He pulled out the envelope and handed it to Maggie.

“A letter from Judith?” She ran her fingers over the front of the makeshift envelope.

“Mhm. Seems they’re becomin’ pretty good pen pals,” He smiled.

“They are. It won’t be long, they’ll be on the radio talkin’. I think Hershel has a lil’ crush,” Maggie’s toothy grin spread.

Daryl grunted, “I got stuff f’ Eugene too.”

“He’s up in the attic monkeying with things, I’ll run it up to him,” Jesus said knowing full well how Eugene liked to talk people’s ears off, and Daryl was more of a quiet man.

“Thanks f’ that,” Daryl remarked looking around, “Where’s Connie?”

“She’s at Oceanside with Kelly and Luke. I know you’re disappointed,” Maggie teased.

“I’ll catch her soon ‘nough.” He shrugged, “’m here now. What can I do t’ help out?”

“We have a few cabins to build. Wanna help with that?”

“Sure,” he nodded, walking with Maggie to the area of expansion past the orchards. He was greeted by Alden, one of the blacksmiths, who was delivering a box of nails.

“Daryl, good to have you here,” Alden smiled, handing him a hammer.

“Jus’ tell me where t’ go.”

He pointed to one of the cabins already in progress. Daryl joined in immediately. As he worked with the others, it wasn’t long before he was sawing logs, roofing, and throwing himself into the job at hand. Daryl didn’t mind hard work. When the frame of the cabin was finished, he felt a sense of accomplishment and moved onto the exterior walls.

When he paused to take a cigarette break, he spotted Lydia making her way over to him. She had a wide smile on her face, her long black hair hanging loosely around her shoulders. Elijah was holding her hand, the same goofy smile on his face. Daryl smirked. Young’uns.

“We brought you some water. You’ve been working hard,” Lydia handed him a canteen.

“Thanks,” he said, swishing the cold liquid in his mouth. Felt cool and refreshing on this warm Spring day.

“We were going to head to Alexandria for a visit, but now seeing as you’re here, we won’t leave until you do. If you don’t mind.”

“Naw could use the company,” he answered, patting her shoulder.

“Great! I miss everyone. And I wanted to see Negan.”

Frowning, “What y’ need t’ see him for? He ain’t no good, Lydia.”

“I know his past, and I know how you feel about him-”

“You don’t know all ‘bout that sumbitch.” Daryl never talked with anyone in his family about what transpired when he was held prisoner at Negan’s compound, Sanctuary. Tortured, starved, stripped down for humiliation…

“I suppose I don’t. But he stuck up for me when those kids attacked me. If it weren’t for him, I might not be here. I don’t need you to understand it, but I won’t sneak around to talk to him.”

Daryl had to give her credit for being so upfront about her connection with Negan. It was true that he helped her one night when three members of Alexandria ganged up on her. It was also true that one ended up dead at Negan’s hand. It was an accident, but with Negan’s history, it nearly got him lynched.

“I don’t understand it, an’ I don’t like it. But I ain’t gonna stop ya.”

That’s one thing Lydia admired about Daryl – he didn’t treat her like a little girl. He talked to her as if she was an adult, and she respected that. Too many people tried to treat her like a child. She was seventeen, and beyond her years in many ways.

Daryl tossed her back the canteen, “Back t’ work. Y’ know, y’all could help out. Get done a lot faster.”

“I can swing a hammer,” Elijah smirked, “I’m gonna help out.”

“I’ve got some other things to do, but then I’ll be back over.” Lydia kissed Elijah before leaving. Elijah blushed and cleared his throat.

“C’mon,” Daryl spoke up, “ ‘s getcha that hammer.”

Chapter 4: First Date

(One Week Later) Daryl drove up to the house where Sybil lived. Already outside, she’d been waiting for him. She laughed when he turned off his motorcycle.

“I just knew you were going to show up on that thing.”

Daryl looked down at the bike, “’s my ride.”

She nodded, “Oh yeah… it’s your ride alright. I’ve never been on one before.”

“Well, y’all will have the time o’ yer life then.” He smiled. She walked over in a pair of tight-fitted jeans, her hips swaying practically mesmerizing him.

“Interesting way to start a first date,” She commented, sliding on behind him. Her hands went to his waist, clutching tight as he kicked the motor on and took off down the street.

“Shouldn’t we have helmets?” She called into the wind. Daryl swung the bike onto the main road.

“Naw… yer fine.”

She laughed, “As I said before, you’re mighty confident.”

Daryl enjoyed the feeling of her behind him, her hands tightening their grip. He lowered his left hand and pulled one of her arms around him tighter.

“You’re bold,” she remarked, but slid her other arm around, locking her hands in front of his stomach.

“So are ya.”

They drove along Pine Lake, one of the first places he could think of to take her. When they got off the bike she said, “You’ve got me alone, in the woods. Should I be afraid?”

“I didn’t keep y’ alive on that bike only t’ kill ya in the woods,” He smirked. She laughed. It was music to his ears; so light and genuine.

“Been t’ Pine Lake ‘fore?”

“Oh yes. This is the main hang-out spot. You?”

“Come here a bit.”

They walked a trail along the east side of the lake, quiet at first.

“So that gang you’re with…” she finally cut the silence as she studied the trees, “been with them long?”

Daryl shrugged, “yeah. They’re kinda family. My big brother Merle started hangin’ out w’ some guys an’ it went from there.”

“How many of you are there?”

“Just one,” he teased.

“Ha ha,” she rolled her eyes.

“’ Bout twenty or so. Why?”

She shrugged, “Just curious.”

She pulled a leaf off a branch and twirled it between her fingers.

“Y’ thinkin’ ‘m gonna be trouble?”

“I don’t know… are you?”

“Maybe,” he stopped walking and pointed, “look,” he whispered, “a doe.”

She squinted, “Where?”

He extended his arm with his fingertip pointing, “Between them two birch trees. See her?”

After a few moments, Sybil smiled brightly, “I do. She’s beautiful. You have a keen eye.”

Daryl shrugged, “maybe.”

“Do you spend a lot of time in the woods?”

“Quite a bit. How ‘bout ya?”

“I love nature, but no… I haven’t been camping since I was a kid.”

“Yer missin’ out.”

“I suppose I am.”

“C’mon, I wanna show y’ somethin’.”

“Okay.”

They continued casually down the trail until he veered off it, onto an unbeaten path.

“Okay, now I know you’re going to kill me,” she teased.

“C’mon,” he rolled his eyes. They came to some tall rocks, “Up f’ a lil’ climbin’?”

Hands on hips she looked up at the rocks, “Should I have worn hiking boots?”

“Naw… them shoes are fine.”

She looked down at her vans and was thankful she’d chosen them.

“Alright. Let’s go. Show me the way.”

“It ain’t gonna be as hard as it looks. Found an easy way to get up there.” He motioned for her to follow. He went around the right-hand side of the stone goliaths.

“See here,” he pointed in front of him and upward, “almost like someone made a trail in them rocks.”

“They look like they have stepping stones cut into them.”

He started up the incline, turning around every so often to make sure she was still behind him. She was eagerly bringing up the rear, keeping close.

“’s is the hard part,” he said, reaching for her hand, “lemme help y’ up the rest o’ the way.”

She took his hand and he pulled just enough to get her over the final ledge. She took a breath and looked down behind her whistling, “We are up high.”

He nodded, “Higher than it looks from down there.”

She noticed a singed area and a pile of wood.

“You come here often?”

He nodded, “’s m’ place t’ getaway. C’mere… an’ look.”

She joined him on the opposite side of the rocks and looked out. What a sight to behold. She could see the large lake in its entirety from this vantage point, and the multitude of trees on the other side. The sun was bright in the sky. She felt as if she could reach out and touch it. The rays warmed her face. She turned to look at Daryl. His blue eyes were studying her, gauging her reaction. The humongous smile on her face was enough for him. He was convinced that she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever laid eyes on.

Daryl rolled to his side and stared into the darkness inside the hay mound sighing. He didn’t sleep much, to begin with. And even less since the world fell. Thinking of her made it near impossible. He sat up while Dog rustled through the hay to rest his head in Daryl’s lap. He brusquely pet the dog's head. Dog whined. He’d been with Daryl so long that he could read his emotions.

“S’ alright, boy. ‘ll get through it. Always do.” He got to his feet, stretched, and said, “C’mon. ‘S go f’ a walk.” Daryl and Dog made their rounds, checking the sentinels on the wall, joining them for a bit to watch for walkers or marauders.

“You’re up early,” Cal commented, shaking out his foot that fell asleep.

Daryl shrugged, “Always am. Don’t need much sleep.”

“I don’t know how you do it, Dixon,” Cal continued.

Diane looked over at the two men, “Be thankful Daryl doesn’t sleep much. He’s saved a lot of our asses more than once because of it.”

Cal knew it was true and agreed, “Oh I know he has. It’s just when I manage to have some time to rest, I conk out. Sometimes for half a day.”

People meandered about as the sun rose, and Daryl found himself back to work at the cabins.

“You know, there’s always one of those here for you,” Jesus said, holding up a board to be nailed.

Daryl said, “Hate t’ take a place from someone else. I don’t mind the hay mound or a tent. ‘M easy.”

“So have you completely set down roots in Alexandria?”

Daryl shrugged, “Dunno if I set roots down anywhere.” The truth was the man had huge bouts of wanderlust and couldn’t sit still for too long before needing to be out in the wild again. He went with Aaron sometimes to look for more people to bring back to the communities. He brought messages from one community to the next. He also liked to provide food, go on scavenging runs; anything to keep himself busy.

People that knew him knew he was this way. They noticed a big change when Rick infamously blew up the bridge that was to connect everyone to save his people. 

Daryl disappeared for three years. During his search for Rick, he met a woman by the name of Leah. No one knew about the affair he’d had with her except Carol. Dog had discovered an old house that seemed abandoned one day during their travels. But it wasn’t empty. That’s when he found an ornery woman living there that didn’t want him anywhere around her land. After about a year they began to talk, her more than him, and in a few more months they shared food. After that Daryl realized how lonely he was; one thing led to another and the two became involved. It didn’t last long. Daryl pulled away for several reasons: he wanted to continue looking for Rick, and he couldn’t allow himself to feel what he once felt for Sybil. When he was with Leah, she knew he was far away in his mind: thinking about his brother, and she had no idea what else. He couldn’t open up to her. That took years and trust. Something he knew he could never have with her. She put conditions on him and gave him ultimatums.

“It’s your brother or me.”

“It’s your family or me.” He was not a man who responded well to conditions. He wasn’t about to choose a woman that wanted all or nothing. So he walked away, never looking back.

Chapter 5: The Race

After two weeks of working on cabins, several were finished thanks to the hard labor everyone put in. Daryl wanted to reward them all with some venison, so he decided he’d head out before the light of day to hunt.

Dog stayed in step with Daryl as they silently made their way through the forest. He’d seen deer droppings which decided the direction they would go. Tell-tale signs of a foraging deer were seen everywhere if you were observant enough. Daryl was a master of tracking. He held his breath as soon as he saw the three-point, lifted his crossbow, aimed, and fired. The arrow hit its mark between the front shoulder and the ribcage, piercing the heart. The deer dropped where it stood, feeling no pain. Just the way Daryl liked it. No suffering.

He set to work right away field dressing the internal organs before he heard the groans of Walkers coming from the left.

“Shit,” he muttered, hefting the deer over his shoulders, “c’mon Dog,” he called, quickly making his exit. The organs would keep the few Walkers busy. At least enough for him to get safely away.

He returned at dusk with his prize, congratulated by many, and thanked personally by Maggie.

“Can’t have them people be veg’tarians,” Daryl teased, taking it to hang out back.

“Oh no, too many vegetables will make the people weak,” Maggie teased. Daryl eyed her between his curtains of bangs, a smirk on his face.

“They’ll appreciate it to be sure. We can do a lot with poultry and beef…”

“But there ain’t nothin’ like venison,” he cut in.

She nodded, “Right.”

They heard kids laughing and spotted Hershel and the other kids playing with Dog. Dog of course loved all the attention.

“Seems good to have them bein’ kids, huh?” Maggie asked, sighing. She had to dig deep to remember the days of misspent youth and no fear. Riding horses with her sister Beth, playing in the fields, and nights catching fireflies.

Daryl nodded as he shoved his bloodied hands into a basin of water, “Mhm… they ain’t had it so good, growin’ up too fast ‘cause t’ way t’ world turned out.” He dried his clean hands on a rag and watched the kids for a bit, a small smile on his face.

“Can’t catch me dog,” Marigold yelled out, her laugh echoing through the trees.

(August) ”You’ll never catch me, Daryl!” Sybil yelled, swimming faster out towards the floating dock in the middle of the lake. Daryl however was an experienced swimmer and was soon closing in on her. The thrill of the chase caused Sybil to start laughing and slowed her down in speed. Daryl slowed his pace, waiting for her to gain her wits and start moving faster again. Soon her hands were touching the dock.

“Damn, y’ got away,” he said, holding the edge of the dock with his hands. She splashed him playfully.

“I know you let me win.”

“Did no such thing.”

She giggled, “Okay… deny it all you want.” She caressed his damp cheek, “I’ll still give you your reward,” she moved closer and kissed his wet lips before pulling up onto the dock. Daryl could feel his stomach flip flop and his heart quicken in reaction to her affection. It was their first kiss. His cheeks reddened and he pulled up onto the dock next to her, their feet dangling in the water. He’d been pursuing her avidly for several months. His first thoughts of just wanting to bed the woman passed once he realized there was so much more to her than just a beautiful body. She had spunk, a clever mind, and kept him on his toes. He’d never met anyone like her before. Sybil seemed to enjoy her time with him, and this kiss just solidified what he was hoping for. He knew that other guys were trying to get her attention, he wasn’t blind. But the more she accepted offers of dates from him, the less concerned he became with them.

She laid back on the dock, the sun’s rays kissing her wet skin. Her hair spread out above her head like a dark halo. Her red one-piece showed plenty but left just the right amount covered to let the imagination run wild.

Daryl chewed his lip for a moment, “Sybil…”

“Mhm?” She hummed, shielding her eyes from the bright sky as she looked his way.

“’S a band playin’ at a bar next weekend. A local band… thought maybe y’all would like t’ go.”

“What kind of music?” she asked him curiously.

“Heavy stuff. Ain’t no room for country shit.”

She grinned, “You’ve got yourself a plus one then. I think it would be a lot of fun.” The idea of being squished in close to her was on his mind. He was still a man after all.

“Rememberin’ the good old days?” Maggie asked. Daryl stopped chewing his lip.

“Gonna go find somethin’ t’ do.”

Chapter 6: Scavenging Parts

“Hey, Daryl…” Jesus caught up with the archer after morning chores, “Eugene needs some parts for the solar panel he’s been working on and gave me directions to a place he thinks I can find those parts. Wanna ride with me, help me out?”

Daryl nodded as he finished brushing a horse down, “be ready in a few. Lemme finish up here.”

Jesus drove fast down the road. Daryl stared at the directions, “A bullfrog’s hop t’ the right of a… what t’ hell is this?” He asked, scratching his head.

Jesus laughed, “It’s directions. Eugene wrote them.”

“F’ fuck’s sake. Two leagues past the old maple tree… ‘s a million maple trees out here!” He threw the instructions on the dashboard. Jesus smirked, “Don’t kill me. I wrote those just to tease you.”

“You bastard,” Daryl huffed, but smiled in the end, “figures. Where’s them directions at?”

Jesus pulled a paper out of his front pocket, “Here.”

Daryl read them quickly, “’s more like it.”

When they rolled up to the old rusty warehouse, Jesus cut the engine and looked over the list Eugene had given him. Daryl got out and started scouting for Walkers, and anyone else who happened along the way. He and Jesus cleared out a small group of the dead before breaking the chain lock on the door to head inside. Pigeons flew in the disturbed air kicking up dust and dirt. The men covered their mouths, Daryl quickly pulling his rag from his back pocket. He tied it over the bottom half of his mouth.  Both were silent as the grave as they passed through the large building in search of any trespassers alive, or undead. Once they were certain it was empty, they set out to find each of the things Eugene wanted. It took longer than they expected since neither knew where to start. Searching boxes, and reading labels… they’d found two of the five things before dark.

“Looks like we’ll be staying the night,” Jesus huffed, wiping the dust from his hands onto his pants.

“Mhm,” Daryl lowered his backpack and brought out some salted dried venison, doling out some pieces to Jesus.

“Thanks,” Jesus said as they sat on the cold cement floor.

 As they settled in for the night, Daryl volunteered to keep a watch out.

“T’morrow we hit them boxes upstairs. Can’t see shit now.”

“Agreed. I didn’t think this would be a two-day trip. I’ll just catch a few winks.”

(1 Year Later) “Sybil, get on over here, woman!” Daryl had called out over the heavy strains of guitar on the jukebox to his girl.

Sybil’s green eyes danced with merriment as she set her beer on the bar and made her way over to the young man who beckoned her. She laughed as he snaked his arms around her waist.

His nose brushed against her ear as he said, “Dance w’ me.” As if she was ever interested in dancing with someone else. She slid her palms flat against his chest as they moved to their own beat. It certainly didn’t match the fast drum solo in the Motorhead song. But finding their way to sway their bodies together had never been a problem. They began to sweat there under the hot lights, their friends milling around them. Some were dancing, others playing pool, and still, some just drinking and sharing conversation.

Daryl’s brother Merle was leaning on his old lady, licking salt from her neck as he downed another shot of tequila. He followed up with a lemon wedge from her cleavage as his loyal gang cheered him on.

“ ‘s get outta here,” Daryl said into Sybil’s ear, “ ‘s gonna get crazy t’night.”

“It’s well on its way,” she said, gripping his hand. They made a quick exit and soon were taking off on his bike. The wind whipped through Sybil’s untethered hair. The exhilaration from the cool air and the feel of her cheek against his back were enough to make Daryl giddy. He pulled up to her apartment and as he walked her to the door she stopped, key in her hand.

“We’ve been seeing each other for a while now,” she spoke up, her eyes staring into his, “and you’ve been good to me, Daryl. Come inside. I want you to stay the night.”

His jaw twitched. He’d been excited for this moment, he wouldn’t deny it. But now that it was here, he felt a sense of pride. He’d spent his time getting to know her. There was still so much to learn. And tonight would be another lesson in the ways of Sybil.

There was no small talk as her roommates were already in their respective rooms sleeping. He hadn’t been in the apartment at night unless there was a crowd of sorority sisters having a party. He and Sybil preferred being out of the house and hanging out with his gang often. She closed her room door there in the dark and turned on a dim lamp next to the bed.

She smiled at him, walking close, her hands caressing either side of his face as they began to kiss passionately. His palms rested on the flat of her back, rubbing slowly up and down as their mouths opened to explore like so many times before. It was more intense though, with pure need behind each tongue lashing and twisting together. A small groan lifted from his throat as she stepped back from him. They stared at one another, the soft glow from the light accentuating her features. The shadows delved into her curves and along the line of her legs.

“Help me out of this skirt, will you, Daryl?”

Daryl heard a noise that caught his attention. He went to investigate but seeing that it was a raccoon he shooed it away before walking the interior of the building alone. He placed a cigarette to his dry lips and lit it. Staring out one of the wide warehouse windows, he saw a few Walkers milling about near the truck. He puffed out some smoke and moved on toward the opposite end.

Sybil was more amazing than he could’ve imagined. Her body was perfection to him, and as she lifted on top of him, her hair swung down her back. He tangled his fingers into it before rubbing down around her ass while she ground her hips on top of him. He breathed as if through honey, labored, and sweet. As she rubbed his chest, a little pout curled on her lips as she neared the height of pleasure, calling out to him. He rolled her to her back, taking her breath away as he kept the rhythm up, bringing her to orgasm. He came in sync with her. He looked down at Sybil, the sweat beading on her forehead, their wet bodies sticking together, and he felt something he’d never felt before – fulfilled.

“Kiss me…” she gasped, still feeling the aftershocks of their lovemaking.

“Ain’t gotta ask, Syb…” He lowered his mouth onto hers, sucking her lips slowly, delightfully before withdrawing. He lay back, his chest still heaving as she lay her cheek upon it, listening to his fast heartbeat. He opened his legs, and she nestled her lower half between them, her stomach resting on his groin, not uncomfortable. He rubbed her saturated back, fingers slipping in the sweat, her hair pasted to her shoulders and his chest. Their bodies fit together like an intimate puzzle. Their hands locked together, fingers woven tight, his free hand cradling her. It was at that moment he knew his heart belonged to her.

When the first hint of light came through the windows, Jesus was up. He and Daryl searched the remainder of the building and found the rest of the items for Eugene by midday.

When they got outside, the Walkers from last night were still wandering around the truck, and seeing the two men, started lurching towards them.

“Dammit,” Jesus uttered while Daryl shot the closest in the head and then pulled his knives. Jesus round-housed one right in the skull, its rotted head exploding from the connection. Daryl took out two, a stab to the front of each temple, and Jesus took down the last one.

“ ‘ll drive,” Daryl said once everything was packed into the back of the pickup. Jesus tossed the keys to him. On the drive to Hilltop, Daryl was reliving those moments with Sybil still. Waking up with his legs wrapped around hers, her body still on his. He could almost feel her warmth, smell her perfume. He swerved almost hitting a Walker in the road. Jesus looked over at him, “Are you sure you’re up for driving?”

“Yeah, ‘m fine.” He sped up to get past the gathering herd quickly leaving them in the dust.

Eugene was pleased as he met the men getting out of the pickup.

“Did y’all find everything?” he asked as he pulled back the tarp over the parts. He went over the list and marked each item off, “Well done, you guys. I know these doodads don’t look like much, but when I get ‘em all put together, we’ll have some fine additions to those cabins y’all been working so hard on. Electricity! Creature comforts.”

“Glad we could help,” Jesus said as he and Daryl unloaded.

“Did you meet up with any trouble?” Maggie asked as she picked up a small box from the back.

“Naw,” Daryl responded.

“Nothing we couldn’t handle,” Jesus added.

( 1 Month Later) Carver College

Daryl spotted Sybil and her friends in the throes of students in the cafeteria. She’d been pouring over textbooks for a test coming up in English Lit class. He breathed hot air on the back of her neck, “Hey babe.”

She smiled as she whispered, “Daryl…”

Mandy sniggered, “You two are something else.”

Daryl kissed Sybil lightly and slid into the chair next to her.

“Where have you been?” She asked in a hushed tone. She hadn’t seen him in four days. No explanations, no phone calls, “I was worried about you. I thought something might have happened to you!”

“Naw, no need t’ worry. ‘M here now.” He rubbed her hand slowly.

She picked up her books and excused herself from her circle of friends. Daryl grabbed them to carry for her. Once they were outside she turned to him, “Where have you been?” She asked him again, “You just disappeared.”

“I had t’ go outta town w’ Merle.”

“To do what?” She asked curiously.

He shrugged, “Just some odd errands, ain’t no big deal.”

“Daryl, it’s a big deal when you’re dating someone, and you just disappear. What if something happened to you?”

“Syb… don’t need t’ keep tabs on me. Ain’t nothin’ gonna happen t’ me.”

She frowned, “I’m not keeping tabs. Why are you keeping secrets?”

Chapter 7: Unavailable

The deer was finally ready to process. Many offered to help him, but he kindly rejected those offers. He wanted to work alone and get things off his mind. His memories were flooding in and he couldn’t build the dam fast enough to keep them at bay. It was close to the time of year when he first met Sybil. Even though people referred to parts of the year by the period of Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter, Daryl knew it was around June. He felt it in his heart, and thoughts of Sybil were at their pinnacle. He sharpened his knife on a whetstone til the blade could slice easily through the meat, and as he removed the hide, he halted suddenly.

(6 Months Later) Sybil looked up from the bed, “Where are you going, hot stuff?”

He zipped his jeans, “gotta go outta town f’ a few days.”

She sat up, slipping on one of his t-shirts, “where? You never say.”

“Nothin’ y’ need t’ worry y’self over, Syb.” He rubbed her shoulders slowly, “Y’ won’t even have time t’ miss me.” He kissed her lips.

“Your brother is a troublemaker. Why do I have the feeling you two get up to no good when you’re gone?”

He shook out his head and started working the hide again, bound to have the hide salted and stretched before dinner. His workworn hands rubbed the salt into the thin layer of skin remaining, and as he was stretching it, he could smell dinner. His stomach rumbled.  He covered the meat with an old tarp and went to join the others.

That night he sat by the campfire longer than most. The dog was sleeping by his foot, basking in the heat from the flames.

(One Year Later)  Daryl knew it was late. It was nearly one. He’d been out fucking around with his gang, causing a ruckus, getting into a fight with another gang, and then Merle suggested they all go out for drinks. Daryl had a few and lost track of time.

“Shit, I gotta go!” He told his brother.

“What? Why?”

“’S Sybil’s birthday. ‘M late.”

“You’re so whipped. Hell, she’ll have another one next year.”

“That ain’t the point!” He said goodbye to his friends and rushed out to his bike. When he got to Sybil’s apartment, he could see the windows were dark. He pulled the present he had messily wrapped out of his saddle bag and went up to the second floor. He knocked on the door, and Theresa answered.

“What are you doing here, Daryl? Don’t you know how to tell time?”

“Jus’ wanna see Syb… don’t need y’all givin’ m’ a hard time. Lemme in.”

“Why don’t you just go and try to make amends tomorrow? You’re on her shit list you know.”

“Who’s at the door?” Sybil called out behind her. Daryl looked over Theresa’s shoulder and saw Sybil tying up her silky robe.

“Syb… ‘s me. I wanna come in.”

“I’ve got this Theresa…”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, you go on back to bed.”

Daryl ducked his head in shame, “Happy Birthday.” He held out the gift. Sybil’s hands were on her hips.

“Kind of late for that. My birthday was yesterday. It’s nearly two. What happened?”

“Got caught up w’ the boys. I lost track o’ time s’ all.”

“Oh, that’s all huh? My birthday didn’t matter much to you then, did it?”

“That ain’t true.”

“Sure it is. If you cared, you’d have been on time. You get with those guys and forget everything.” She pulled him into the room, and looked at him in the light, “And what the hell happened to your chin?”

Daryl instinctively touched his jaw. He must’ve gotten a bruise from the fight.

“You’ve been fighting again?”

“Weren’t much o’ a fight,” he half–laughed, “We got ‘em good.”

She stared at him angrily, “I can’t believe you’re missing the point here.” She wiped tears from her eyes, “I don’t think this is going to work out.”

“What? Y’ breakin’ up w’ me?!”

“Yes, I am.”

“Because m’ late f’ y’ birthday?”

“You just don’t get it. You didn’t show up. You didn’t call. And when you finally do show up you don’t feel one inch of remorse for it all.”

“Said I was sorry, Syb. Don’t be like that.”

“No, you didn’t apologize. You bragged about a fight. I don’t want to be a part of this. I expect more from the man I care about.”

He wiped his eyes, blaming the smoke from the fire, and decided it was time to head back to Alexandria. He’d leave as soon as he finished preparing the meat for Hilltop.

Chapter 8: Camping

Daryl waited a couple weeks for Sybil to cool off after their split.

“You’re better off without her baby brother. Now you ain’t tied down to one woman, you can date any y’all want.”

“Don’t wanna date anyone else. I want Sybil,” he muttered, wiping his greasy hands on a rag. He turned over the engine on his bike, bringing it back to life after its tune-up.

“Well she don’t want nothin’ to do with your sorry ass. She thinks she’s too good for ya! There’s plenty of other bitches that are interested in ya.”

“She ain’t a bitch, Merle. She’s different than them other girls.”

“Ooh, are you in love, pussy?”

“Why am I tellin’ y’ anythin’?” He put his tools away, and said, “Goin’ out f’ a bit.”

“Go on then, run back to that highfalutin’ uptown bitch. She must have some sugar ‘tween her legs to keep ya comin’ back to her.”

He showed up at Save A Lot where Sybil worked. She wasn’t at the cash register, but he found her stocking shelves as he searched the aisles.

“Hey Syb…” he said as he approached. She stopped marking canned goods with the pricing gun and looked in his direction.

“What are you doing here?”

“Came t’ apologize. M’ sorry I was such a dick.”

“Are you? Because I have the feeling that the sort of thing that got you in trouble with me in the first place is going to keep happening.”

“Naw… it ain’t. What can I do t’ make y’ change y’ mind?”

She huffed, “You need to stop fighting. I knew full well you were in a gang when I met you. But I don’t think I realized what that entailed.”

He reached out and touched one of her curls, wrapping it around his finger, “I can stop fightin’.”

“Yeah, right,” She rolled her eyes.

“I can,” he insisted.

“Prove it.”

“I will. Supposed t’ be a lil’ somethin’ on Friday. ‘ll come an’ see y’all instead. Maybe I can help you study…” he leaned his arm against the shelf, keeping close to her, “what d’ ya say?”

“Give me a week to think things over. Stay out of trouble until then. I refuse to have a boyfriend that will probably end up in jail. You’re better than that.”

He screeched to a halt on his bike. Right in the middle of the road. 

“Can’t go back to Alexandria.” He felt a tightness in his chest, “Just can’t. C’mon.” He veered off the road and pushed his bike into some bramble to hide it.

He and Dog made their way deep into the forest around them. He knew the area well. He retreated towards a long winding river that cut through a clearing and set up a little lean-to between two trees and dug out a hole for a campfire. He set up a perimeter and fashioned a spear from a sturdy branch to go fishing. He and Dog ate a fine catch of fish for dinner.

He lay back against a log and stared up through the tree branches as the stars peeked into the holes between the leaves.

Three months later, they were back together. It took him that long to convince Sybil that he was staying out of trouble. He hung with the gang but skipped out when any brouhahas took place. His brother and friends didn’t let him live it down. He took the brunt of their brutal teasing, keeping his focus on what he really wanted, Sybil.

He watched as Sybil tried to figure out the instructions to the tent she’d brought on their first camping trip. It was early Autumn, and the weather was still pretty warm. He snorted, “Don’t need that booklet. Didn’t need no fancy tent neither.”

“I wanted it to be special,” she huffed, “and I can’t make heads or tails of any of this.”

He walked over, grabbed the instructions, and tossed them in the fire.

“Hey!” She laughed, “How do you expect to set up this tent then?”

He set to work, “Syb… pull them ropes your way.” He handed her a spike, “Stick ‘em in the ground…”

He pulled the other side and did the same. He put together the supports inside, assembling the tent in no time. She smiled proudly as she looked at the results.

“I knew you were good for something,” she teased, messing with his short hair.

That night after hot and heavy lovemaking, they went skinny dipping in the river not far from their setup. She shone under the moonlight, her body dancing with the beads of water dripping down her shoulders, over her breasts, and into the water at her waist. Daryl joined her and as they made out she said, “I could stay here forever.”

How he wished he had.

Chapter 9: The Thick of the Woods

Daryl spent weeks wandering the woods. He’d become so silent, he didn’t even need to call Dog, Dog just knew when to come. He’d gone a longer distance with each day, following the river downstream. He’d passed some small makeshift cabins and checked them out. Even spent some nights in one or two of them. He fought Walkers. Trudged through a downpour. Played with Dog in different clearings they happened upon. They lived off fish, rabbits, squirrels, wild yams, and leeks.

(2 Years Later) Sybil and Daryl got an apartment together. They’d been together for well over four years, and things just fell into place. They were happy, content with life. She was in her fourth year of college, she wanted to be a teacher, and Daryl was working for a local garage fixing just about anything with a motor.

“C’mon Syb… y’all get that cute ass in here. ‘ll help y’ study.” Daryl wanted to be as supportive to Sybil as he could. Even when he didn’t understand what he was quizzing her on, he felt proud of his girl for being so smart.

“If I don’t know it by now, I’m never going to know it.”

“C’mon ‘s the hard stuff, Early Childhood Development,” He held up the book, “We’re gonna go over t’ ones highlighted. Y’all got the rest down pat.”

“Okay, okay,” She threw her hands up in the air.

“Listen… ‘s somethin’ y’ really want, right?”

“Yes,” she answered, her eyes locking with his.

“Then y’ gotta put the time in. ‘S been four long years, but ‘s almost over. Don’t give up.” He squeezed her hand gently as he leaned in to kiss her.

“What would I do without you?” She asked, rubbing his scruffy cheek.

“Fail t’ damn test,” he teased, wiggling his eyebrows. They both laughed, “Right. Question one…”

He smiled at the thought, on how she graduated in the top five of her class. He’d liked to have thought he was part of the reason for that, if she wasn’t so smart to begin with. Still, it was some of his favorite time back then, watching her mind work, the way she’d bite her tongue and look at the ceiling while she thought about her answers, and how she loved to be rewarded with kisses.

One evening, just before dusk he heard a scream. Another voice was yelling, “Over here… this way!”

Heavy footfalls, groaning, and growling. Walkers. He followed the sounds and before crashing through the brush, he surveyed the situation. About ten Walkers were surrounding a couple of women and a man. They were fighting the Walkers pretty well, but there were too many. Daryl aimed his crossbow, clipping one Walker in the head about to bite the man’s shoulder. He fell to the ground. Unsure of what happened, the people continued to fight. He unsheathed his two knives, broke through the brush, and took two out, slicing another at the knees. One of the women brought down a knife into its brain. The other woman shoved a Walker into a tree and split its head with a machete. Three more to go. The man was backing up, looking to see if there were any more, turned around, and got one mere moment from attacking him. Daryl wiped the blades on his filthy pants and looked at the people quickly.

“Thank you,” one of the women breathed, “I don’t know if we could’ve made it without your help. Imagine finding another living soul in the woods.”

Daryl nodded as Dog sniffed around for any other threats. The woman with the cleaver was kneeling, cleaning her blade on one of the Walker’s shirts.

“Yes, thank you.” She stood up and turned to face the man, “we wouldn’t have made it.” She brushed an arm across her grimy face and said, “Do we look as bad as you do?” She smiled at the light joke. Daryl did a double-take. He squinted his eyes and studied the woman closely. She wasn’t anything to look at from first glance being road worn and ragged. But he saw those mystifying green eyes he’d never forget.

“S… Sybil?” His voice broke from being quiet for so long. It sounded foreign to him.

“How do you know my name?” She asked, eyeing the stranger. He was caked in mud, grungy from head to toe, long filthy hair pasted to his dirtied face.

“’S me…” was all he could muster taking a step closer. The woman looked deeply into the man’s eyes.

“Syb… ‘s Daryl…” he patted his chest.

“Daryl?” Her eyes widened. With sharp analysis, she determined that under that mess was the man from her past when everything was right in the world. Her throat closed as she stood stone still. The air was so thick, no one spoke, but everyone was bewildered that Sybil could find someone in the middle of nowhere that knew her.

There was movement behind her and a voice, “Mom? Is it safe to come out?”

For Part Two Click Here

[madame-wilsonn]

Midnights: Chapter 7

MASTERLIST — MIDNIGHTS MASTERLIST

Summary: Tommy’s demons are haunting him with thoughts and ideas that could lead him to do an irrevocable act, standing on a bridge

A/N: and another depressing chapter for you all to enjoy! I got inspired by the episode 4 from season 5 (and by inspired I mean “watched the same 10 minutes over and over until I had them engraved in my memory) and it’s the first chapter set in s5. From now on, there will be less and less time jumps but I wanted to address that particular scene because it seemed important. Anywayyy enjoy and see you next week!! <3

Warnings: mentions of suicide, dead people and ghosts

Word count: 1,192 words

It wasn’t the blue stone, Tommy. It was you. It was you.

She stood in the corner of the room, appearing in the dimly lit office, the chain of necklace jingling as it moved. Grace always visited him at night, she waited for the clear sun to disappear to strike, hit him when he was the most vulnerable.

Her voice rang in the empty room. Tommy could feel her heartbeat slowing down as she clutched the sapphire close to her chest. There was blood dripping down her hands, staining the luxurious carpet. Grace was gasping, her breaths more and more shallow.

Tommy didn’t look at her. If he ignored her, she would go away. Her apparitions became less and less comforting as time passed. At first, she helped him, made him feel the warmth he craved. Now, he felt haunted by her. She reminded him of his faults, stirred the knife of guilt into unhealed wounds.

It seemed like hours had passed when finally, the ominous presence vanished. Tommy slumped in his chair, the ache in his head intensifying. His clenched fists were sore, his nails digging his skin. He reached for the drawer next to his hand, his fingers grazing the cold barrel of the revolver. The feeling seemed to bring some clarity inside his mind, the blurry haze the wraith had diffused disappearing.

Tommy finally grabbed his cap, closed the door of his office and exited the House of Commons. He was suffocating in that study. He needed to think. Alone.

He took his car and drove through the streets of London, aimlessly. He didn’t know where he was going, he didn’t know anything anymore. The car stopped, Tommy didn’t realize he had pushed the button. His hand opened the door, his feet stepped out. He was moving, he could feel himself moving but he didn’t have any control anymore. It wasn’t him who chose to walk on the bridge. His arm reached for a lamppost, his feet climbed on the edge—the sheltering barrier between the world of the living and the dead.

Tommy almost heaved, the sudden void under him making his stomach churn. His mum went that way. She stepped into the Canal, back in Small Heath. Uncle Charlie told him everything.

Tommy remembered the months before her death. She would mutter all day long, even if nobody was in the room. She said it was the spirits, they kept her company. His mother was a sad woman. She was sad because she had no choice. Nowhere to escape. Until Charlie told her to leave for some time. That’s when she came back with the white pony.

Tommy loved that horse because suddenly, his mum wasn’t so sad anymore. She would smile at him and she didn’t speak to the spirits as much. He thought it was over. The spirits and the seances, all that shit was over. His mum was home now, it would be okay.

A few weeks later, Charlie pulled her body out of the Cut.

Tommy used to be scared of her as a boy. Now he understood how she felt. He was nowhere near the condition of his mother. His spouse didn’t come home drunk every night to beat him, he wasn’t poor or had too many mouths to feed. But he felt the same longing. A yearning for death, a yearning for the void, for a place where he wouldn’t have to ache anymore.

His mum used the pills to get away, he had his precious vial of opium.

The situations were different but they were the same. He didn’t even see it coming. He had spent so many years trying not to be his father that he ended up like his mum.

As he stood on the bridge, so close to the edge, he realized he could leave like she did. Relax his sore limbs and let go. Immerse himself in the cold, dark waters and allow it to get inside his lungs. He wouldn’t fight it, wouldn’t try to escape. He would just welcome the sweet burn forewarning of the eternal darkness. Death. Peace.

There was no point in fighting anymore. The family was falling apart, his children were terrified of him, Lizzie loathed the mere sight of him—she wanted to get a divorce. It made him chuckle. A fucking divorce. He couldn’t blame her. Hell, he was surprised he didn’t wake up to an empty house and packed suitcases already. But her anger—although justified—made him understand his presence became more and more of a burden. He was a liability, there was no point in apologizing. It wouldn’t change much.

But Tommy could free them. He could allow his family to be happy. They would live off of the money he had made. Lizzie would find someone— a good man, and Charlie and Ruby would be raised properly. They would be loved. They would be happy. They wouldn’t have to worry about him screaming anymore.

Tommy considered all of his cards, all of his options and death…death seemed like the only solution. He glanced at the water under his feet. One move and it would all be over. Just let go, Tom. Let go.

But Tommy saw a boat, a boat on the river. It looked familiar at first, then he recognized it. The January. His dad’s boat. The boat he was born on.

Grace was there. She lay in a heap of coal, her eyes looking up towards the bridge. But she wasn’t alone. No, he was there too. His own self seemed to call out for him. They stared at each other and Tommy understood. His reflection drove the boat away, following the dark waters, sinking into the night.

From the bridge, he observed the scene like the path he had to follow. It was the only way. Charlie told him his grandfather went the same way. He killed himself. He said that sometimes, these kind of things ran in families. Maybe they did, maybe Tommy’s fate was to jump from a bridge and die. Die the same way he felt, the same way he lived. Alone.

Who would find him?

For a moment, Tommy wondered. Would Lizzie be worried he didn’t come home? Would he be found by some random man, early in the morning and get recognized as Mr. Shelby, MP? He tried to imagine his family, Polly, Arthur getting the phone call and rushing to the hospital. But they weren’t crying. Nobody was sad. It didn’t seem to change anything, except that now, the weight was lifted.

Once, Polly had told him he had to shake hands with the devil and walk away. But what happened when he couldn’t walk away from it? What happened when the devil cornered him on a barge in ominous waters? All these years, Tommy thought he had walked away, that he was past that but it was an illusion, a vicious trick from his mind.

He couldn’t walk away because there was nowhere to go. Tommy was still on the boat. He had never gotten off of it, he never will.

And only the January could take him away.

Taglist: @aaskoct​ @cillmequick @dandelionprints @edmundo-diaz @forgottenpeakywriter @huntingingoodwill​ @iwantmyredvelvetcupcake​ @jokim @julkaamazing​ @lili12356 @look-at-the-soul​ @lyarr24​ @midnightmagpiemama​ @milkshakelol @notyour-valentine​ @rangerelik​ @salvatoremeanssavior @thesoldiersminute​ @emotionalcadaver @zablife​ @shelbydelrey​ @peakypolly 

[halloweenvalentine1997]

Pariah by Vivica Salem

In July 2020, I was released from a state mental institution after a 7 month stay. I was unable to find housing because of my felonies, and my parents didn’t want me back in their house. So a hospital van dropped me off at a local women’s homeless shelter, a brick building with a parking lot on surveillance. I spent the first day or two browsing through used paperbacks donated to the bookshelves. Sitting inside on the utilitarian bed. Going outside to chain-smoke on the blacktop. Everyone around me was talking shit and making me feel dangerous. I used the sign-out sheet to write the time and the reason for my leaving: “walk”.

So I went on a meth binge with my imaginary lovers. Swallowed it from my palm, its dust like a diamond disintegration. We lingered under the freight train bridge, smoking hit after hit with a multitude of people. As the curtain of velvet night fell over the skyscrapers, the courthouse, the smokestacks, the labyrinths, I noticed a young brown haired woman having a bad trip on a drug. She was moving erratically from side to side, and seemed to be fixated on the guy I was talking to. It’s been three years so it’s hard to recollect their faces, but I’ve been haunted by what happened ever since. The guy was around her age, also young. Both were homeless. I was very high and felt V.S., my imaginary spouse, whisper in my ear, “If she’s going to follow this guy, let’s go with her.” Me, the guy and the girl with drug-induced anxiety ended up all walking in the same direction past vacant traffic lights and darkened apartments. We made it to the river and it must have been the middle of the night. I do not understand why I wasn’t feeling any fear, but I helped her drink from a water bottle someone was holding in a vehicle by the serpentine black river. We walked further on and turned to the right through pathways of rocks and green foliage. 

A campsite with a makeshift tent soon came into view. Dismantled books were shredded by a campfire not lit; they must’ve been using the paper remains of the books to cook in the wild, to light a flame. Another girl was sleeping next to a small black kitten. I petted the kitten while I heard the guy say to the girl who followed him there, “I could throw your dead body in the river.” 

“Don’t talk like that!” I snapped.

He quit. The girl who was tripping on drugs walked away from us minutes later. She somehow made her way  through the dark, navigated all those moonlit rocks and fell asleep by a playground, where I saw her in the morning. I’ll never know why I didn’t go with her. Maybe because of the meth I was offered at the campsite. I was glad to ditch the guy, who I could see was as cold as a glacier. I was about to ascend a hill back into the downtown area when I was offered a ride. Like the people from earlier, his face is a blur and I can’t remember what we talked about, smoking meth in his truck. We went to a Motel 6, he went to get more meth and let me stay in the rented room by myself, where I shouted at the TV. I left the room briefly to go have a cigarette. I came back inside the building to discover I was locked out of my room, and my sneakers were still in the room. I told a motel staff but he wouldn’t let me back in to get them.

 “How do I know they’re your sneakers?” When I started screaming, he threatened to call security. They were ugly sneakers anyway. I left in my black socks with my valuables still intact. I walked from the motel until my feet started to burn several minutes later. I sat in the shade next to the first business I saw, a convenience store. Someone placed a bottle of strawberry soda beside me. I felt half-dead. When the staff of the convenience store noticed I was loitering, I told them what happened and why I wasn’t leaving. 

“I don’t have any shoes, and the pavement feels like walking on hot coals.”

They didn’t care. One said I was “worse than dirt”, the other employee tossed my soda bottle into the shrub by a parking space after a lecture about following rules. 

“Now you’re the one breaking the rules,” I said (feeling like laughing). “You’re littering in the bushes.”

The guy who compared me to dirt called the police on his smartphone. 

I didn’t care because it’s not like I had any drugs or weapons on me, anyway. They took a long time to respond, but someone unseen saved my ass. 

Some turquoise flip flops were tossed next to me. I thanked whoever it was profusely, put them on and left the store, never to return. I went back to the freight train bridge, thankfully not having to deal with police. I was glad to see the girl who was mistreated earlier also made her way back from the riverside and was alive. I knew I had to return to the homeless shelter. I was kicked out of there for smoking a cigarette too late at night. The place had a lot of pointless rules for no reason. I returned to my family home and found a way to reconcile things with my parents.

I’ve been sober from methamphetamine for one year. 

I don’t walk outside at night anymore.

I have two Gemini twins of mine that rest upon my shoulders.

One is dressed in black and white, the other favors red and white. 

Three years later and I realize my own identity has become a triad. 

Three years later and I’m not still locked up in jail or the psych ward.

One year without fucking up my mind on meth. 

I don’t want to leave this room. I don’t want to leave imaginary rooms. 

I want to make amends, but I don’t know how. I can’t remember most of what I did wrong.

I don’t want to be dragged through the thorns and thickets of reality anymore, entangled, pricked.

I want to replace grim shades with pastel. I want to hide (with the invisible ones I love) inside a treehouse. 

Into the woods.

Away from the lenses, the screens. 

You can’t put a wire in the trunk of a tree.

You can’t dangle one from the pines.

The only eyes in the woods are those of the wilderness creatures. 

And my own, their own, crowned with bones. 

Butterflies on shadowed violet lids.

A “Keep Out” sign on the door. 

I never want to see anybody again.

[theweirdladynextdoor]

Not for Everyone: A grand list of 143 weird books

This is my meticulously curated list of 143 of the weirdest books I’ve ever read.  Weird here can mean subject matter, the way it was written, or just that it’s off the beaten path.  It certainly does not include every weird book out there.  But it is a start if you are interested in reading weird lit yet have no idea where to begin.  I encourage you to dig in... if you dare.

 1.      Dirty Secret: A Daughter Comes Clean About Her Mother's Compulsive Hoarding by Jessie Sholl, (2010)

2.      Ghost Story by Peter Straub, (1989)

3.      My Life Among the Serial Killers: Inside the Minds of the World's Most Notorious Murderers by Helen Morrison and Harold Goldberg, (2004)

4.      The Amityville Horror by Jay Anson, (1977)

5.      Sophie Crumb: Evolution of a Crazy Artist by Sophie Crumb, (2010)

6.      The Farm: Life Inside a Women's Prison by Andi Rierden, (1997)

7.      On the Bus: The Complete Guide to the Legendary Trip of Ken Kesey and the Merry Pranksters and the Birth of Counterculture by Paul Perry, (1997)

8.      The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson, (1959)

9.      Nightwork: Sexuality, Pleasure, and Corporate Masculinity in a Tokyo Hostess Club by Anne Allison, (1994)

10.  The A-Z Encyclopedia of Serial Killers by Harold Schechter, (1996)

11.  Not Without my Daughter by Betty Mahmoody, (1987)

12.  Herland by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, (1915)

13.  Sybil: The Classic True Story of a Woman Possessed by Sixteen Personalities by Flora Rheta Schreiber, (1973)

14.  Electroboy: A Memoir of Mania by Andy Behrman, (2002)

15.  You Better Not Cry: Stories for Christmas by Augusten Burroughs, (2009)

16.  Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk, (2008)

17.  Pimp: The Story of my Life by Iceberg Slim, (1967)

18.  Black Hole by Charles Burns, (2005)

19.  My Lobotomy by Howard Dully and Charles Fleming, (2007)

20.  Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Alison Bechdel, (2006)

21.  Hell’s Angels: A Strange and Terrible Saga by Hunter S. Thompson, (1966)

22.  The Electric Kool-aid Acid Test by Tom Wolfe, (1968)

23.  Hardcore Mother by Maxon Crumb, (2001)

24.  In the Heart of the Sea: The Tragedy of the Whaleship Essex by Nathaniel Philbrick,  (2000)

25.  House of Leaves and The Whalestoe Letters by Mark Z. Danielewski, (2000)

26.  Tweak: Growing up on Methamphetamines by Nic Sheff, (2008)

27.  Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream by Hunter S. Thompson, (1971)

28.  I Like You: Hospitality under the Influence by Amy Sedaris, (2006)

29.  Stranger than Fiction by Chuck Palahniuk, (2004)

30.  SantaLand Diaries by David Sedaris, (1998)

31.  Trout Fishing in America/ The Pill vs. The Springhill Mine Disaster/ In Watermelon Sugar by Richard Brautigan, (1989)

32.  The Long, Hard Road out of Hell by Marilyn Manson, (1998)

33.  Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs, (1959)

34.  She’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb, (1992)

35.  Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People by Amy Sedaris, (2010)

36.  Voluntary Madness: My Year Lost and Found in the Loony Bin by Norah Vincent, (2008)

37.  The Cannibals of Candyland by Carlton Mellick III, (2009)

38.  The Sallie House Haunting by Debra Lyn Pickman, (2010)

39.  The Demonologist by Gerard Brittle, (1980)

40.  Off Season (Dead River #1) by Jack Ketchum, (1980)

41.  Room by Emma Donoghue, (2010)

42.  The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum, (1989)

43.  The Lottery and Other Stories by Shirley Jackson, (1949)

44.  When Rabbit Howls by Truddi Chase, (1987)

45.  Red Dragon by Thomas Harris, (1981)

46.  Dark Places by Gillian Flynn, (2009)

47.  The Hot House: Life Inside Leavenworth Prison by Pete Earley, (1992)

48.  Ted Bundy: Conversations with a Killer by Stephen Michaud and Hugh Aynesworth, (1989)

49.  Devil’s Knot: The True Story of the West Memphis Three by Mara Leveritt, (2002)

50.  The Ice Man: Confessions of a Mafia Contract Killer by Philip Carlo, (2006)

51.  The Complete Grimm’s Fairytales by Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm, (1812)

52.  Lost at Sea: The Jon Ronson Mysteries by Jon Ronson, (2012)

53.  Them: Adventures with Extremists by Jon Ronson, (2001)

54.  The Psychopath Test: A Journey through the Madness Industry by Jon Ronson, (2011)

55.  Life After Death by Damien Echols, (2012)

56.  The Nasty Bits: Collected Varietal Cuts, Usable Trim, Scraps, and Bones by Anthony Bourdain, (2005)

57.  Damned by Chuck Palahniuk, (2011)

58.  Party Monster: A Fabulous but True Tale of Murder in Clubland by James St. James, (1999)

59.  What Cops Know by Connie Fletcher, (1990)

60.  Mommie Dearest by Christina Crawford, (1978)

61.  I’m Down Mishna Wolf, (2009)

62.  Jesus Land: A Memoir by Julia Scheeres, (2005)

63.  Free For All: Oddballs, Geeks, and Gangstas in the Public Library by Don Borchert, (2007)

64.  Sickened: The Memoir of a Munchausen by Proxy Childhood by Julie Gregory, (2003)

65.  Newjack: Guarding Sing Sing by Ted Conover, (1999)

66.  Word Freak: Heartbreak, Triumph, Genius, and Obsession in the World of Competitive Scrabble Players by Stefan Fatsis, (2001)

67.  Napalm & Silly Putty by George Carlin, (2001)

68.  Crimson Stain by Jim Fisher, (2000)

69.  Are you my Mother? A Comic Drama by Alison Bechdel, (2012)

70.  The Complete Persepolis by Satrapi Marjane, (2003)

71.  Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury, (1962)

72.  Hunger Makes Me A Modern Girl by Carrie Brownstein, (2015)

73.  Drinking at the Movies by Julia Wertz, (2010)

74.  Calling Dr. Laura by Nicole J. Georges, (2013)

75.  The Devil in the Kitchen: Sex, Pain, Madness, and the Making of a Great Chef by Marco Pierre White, (2006)

76.  Food: A Love Story by Jim Gaffigan, (2014)

77.  American Splendor Presents: Bob and Harv’s Comics by Harvey Pekar and Robert Crumb, (1996)

78.  My Friend Dahmer by Derf Backderf, (2012)

79.  Cake Wrecks: When Professional Cakes go Hilariously Wrong

80.  Bedbugs by Ben H. Winters, (2011)

81.  Chicken: Self Portrait of a Young Man for Rent by David Henry Sterry, (2002)

82.  Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things That Happened by Allie Brosh, (2013)

83.  You Got Nothing Coming: Notes from A Prison Fish by Jimmy A. Lerner, (2002)

84.  Over Easy by Mimi Pond, (2014)

85.  Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo, and Me by Ellen Forney, (2012)

86.  SCUM Manifesto by Valerie Solanas, (1967)

87.  The Gallery of Regrettable Food: Highlights from Classic American Recipe Books by James Lileks, (2001)

88.  Horrorstör by Grady Hendrix, (2014)

89.  My Best Friend’s Exorcism by Grady Hendrix, (2016)

90.  A Head Full of Ghosts by Paul Tremblay, (2015)

91.  This House is Haunted by Guy Lyon Playfair, (1980)

92.  The Sarah Book by Scott McClanahan, (2015)

93.  Crapalachia: A Biography of a Place by Scott McClanahan, (2013)

94.  The Black Hope Horror: The True Story of a Haunting by Ben and Jean Williams, (1991)

95.  $2.00 A Day: Living on Almost Nothing in America by Kathryn J. Edin and H. Luke Shaefer, (2015)

96.  The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit by Michael Finkel, (2017)

97.  True Crime Addict: How I Lost Myself in the Mysterious Disappearance of Maura Murray by James Renner, (2016)

98.  The Road to Jonestown: Jim Jones and People’s Temple by Jeff Guinn, (2017)

99.  Conversations with Ed and Lorraine Warren by T. Sealyham, (2011)

100.  Educated by Tara Westover, (2018) 

101.  North of Normal: A Memoir of My Wilderness Childhood, My Unusual Family, and How I Survived Both by Cea Sunrise Person, (2014)

102.  I’ll Be Gone In The Dark: One Woman’s Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer by Michelle McNamara, (2018)

103.  Son of a Grifter: The Twisted Tale of Sante and Kenny Kimes, the Most Notorious Con Artists in America: A Memoir By The Other Son by Kent Walker and Mark Schone, (2001)

104.  Playing Dead: A Journey Through the World of Death Fraud by Elizabeth Greenwood, (2016)

105.  The Contortionist’s Handbook by Craig Clevenger, (2002)

106.  Selp-Helf by Miranda Sings, (2015)

107.  The Art and Science of Dumpster Diving by John Hoffman and Bruce Sterling, (1992)

108.  Strays: A Lost Cat, a Homeless Man, and Their Journey Across America by Britt Collins, (2017)

109.  My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh, (2018)

110.   A Father’s Story by Lionel Dahmer, (1994)

111.  The Gates of Janus: Serial Killing and Its Analysis by Ian Brady, (2001)

112.  Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh, (2015)

113.  IT’S ME Edward Wayne Edwards: The Serial Killer You’ve Never Heard of by John A. Cameron, (2014)

114.  We Sold Our Souls by Grady Hendrix, (2018)

115.  The Trauma Cleaner: One Woman's Extraordinary Life in the Business of Death, Decay, and Disaster by Sarah Krasnostein, (2017)

116.  The Psychopath Inside: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Journey into the Dark Side of the Brain by James Fallon, (2013)

117. Rising out of Hatred: The Awakening of a Former White Nationalist by Eli Saslow, (2018)

118.  Weekends at Bellevue: Nine Years on the Night Shift at the Psych E.R. by Julie Holland, (2009)

119.  The Phantom Prince: My Life with Ted Bundy by Elizabeth Kendall, (1981)

120.  High on Arrival by Mackenzie Phillips, (2009)

121.  Hell’s Gate: Terror at Bobby Mackey’s Music World by Douglas Hensley, (1993)

122.  From Cradle to Grave: The Short Lives and Strange Deaths of Marybeth Tinning’s Nine Children by Joyce Egginton, (1989)

123.  In The Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado, (2019)

124.  Love as Always, Mum xxx by Mae West, (2018)

125.  Solutions and other Problems by Allie Brosh, (2020)

126.  The Serial Killer Cookbook: True Crime Trivia and Disturbingly Delicious Last Meals from Death Row's Most Infamous Killers and Murderers by Ashley Lecker, (2020)

127.  Trixie and Katya's Guide to Modern Womanhood by Trixie Mattel, Katya Zamolodchikova, (2020)

128.  American Animals: A True Crime Memoir by Eric Borsuk, (2018)

129.  The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix, (2020)

130.  Couple Found Slain: After a Family Murder by Mikita Brottman, (2021)

131.  Broken (In the Best Possible Way) by Jenny Lawson, (2021)

132. You’ll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey: Crazy Stories about Racism by Amber Ruffin, (2021)

133.  Yearbook by Seth Rogen, (2021)

134.  Today a Woman went Mad in the Supermarket: Stories by Hilma Wolitzer, (2021)

135.  Nightbitch by Rachel Yoder, (2021)

136.  Chasing the Boogeyman by Richard Chizmar, (2021)

137.  A Killer by Design: Murderers, Mindhunters, and My Quest to Decipher the Criminal Mind by Ann Burgess, (2021)

138.  Tiger King: The Official Tell-all Memoir by Joe Exotic, (2021)

139.  The Minds of Billy Milligan by Daniel Keyes, (1981)

140.  Waiting for an Echo: The Madness of American Incarceration by Christine Montross, (2020)

141.  The Empathy Exams by Leslie Jamison, (2014)

142.  Murder Book: A Graphic Novel of a True Crime Obsession by Hilary Fitzgerald Campbell, (2021)

143.  Nobody's Fool: The Life and Times of Schlitzie the Pinhead by Bill Griffith, (2019)

[ghostwriter2203]

Chapter 1, The First Murder

The thunder sound is being heard in the neighborhood. The rain hit the house's roofs and windows, and the lightning struck down on grass or trees, but within the storm, something was happening in a grey wooden house. All of the sounds from the thunderstorm block all of the bloody screams. A single dem of light comes from the grey house as the candlelight burns out; a black shadow walks up to the window where the candlelight was light when a flash of lightning struck to see the grins on their face.

12:37 am

The storm wasn't gonna away any time soon as Dani woke up cause of it; she glared at the sound of raindrops hitting her window. Then she glanced at her clock to see it was 1 o'clock in the morning; then she stood up to hear the raindrops hitting her window and roof with the sounds of rain hitting her windows. Dani didn't hear the bloody screams coming from her neighbor's house. Dani went downstairs to enter her kitchen; she made some tea to help herself calm down. Dani got herself a cup of water and looked out the window to watch the raindrops hitting the glass. Then she glanced over the clock to check the time.

12: 47 am.

It's almost one in the morning, and Dani has work Today that she works at this cafe while she helps her two friends at the restaurant. She yawns and goes back upstairs, then notices that her neighbor's home lights are flicking. She shrugged her shoulders and went back to bed.

At the house to hear the bodies bringing dragging across the floor. The person groans and struggle with it until he jumps when he hears the gunshot as another walks out of the room. " That's the last of them." As the masked guy raises an eyebrow at him, he says, " You sure?" he nods. " Alright then. Let's burn these bodies and return to the bosses before sunlight comes back." they put the dead bodies in the background of the home. The masked guy put gasoline on the dead bodies and then lit them on fire.

Another guy hears police cars gonna and firetrucks sounds. Both of the men escape from the scene before anyone catches them.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Dani is in her kitchen, making breakfast for her and her pet dog, Glenn. She turned on the news to watch and see what's gonna on Today. When Dani realizes the news team is in her neighborhood at the house across from her. Dani's eyes widen when she sees the three dead bodies burned to chips and have a black color on their bones.

''Today is a sad day for this family of three, and the father and husband have murdered their own family out of cold blood. He used a knife to stab his wife in the head 45 times as his children had the same fate. The girl was named Rose, who was only 7 years old, while the son was named Ryan and was only 10 years old. The wife of the children is named Chole, who was only 28 years old. The murder happened last night during the storm, so nobody wouldn't hear the screams or the fighting in this house." The news lady reported. The camera forces the FBI and police officers to enter the home or leave.

Then the camera goes back to the news lady. " Her husband's name is Billy, who was the person that did this to his own family. He doesn't have the last name or anything we know now, but we know he is still out there. He has brown hair, hazel eyes, and pale skin. " they hear a car pulls up to the scene as the vehicle turns off. The car door opens as a young woman mid-20s. The news lady gasped, and smiles appeared on her face. " That's the youngest detective in the police station. She doesn't talk much or share any information about the cases that she did in the past," she added.

Then another person shows up beside he and puts his hand on her head as she looks annoyed. " That's her partner Jeffrey Dean Morgan. These two have been detectives, and I can tell they have been friends." the news lady walks over to them, and the girl knocks Jeffrey's hand off her head. " Hey, you guys don't mind if I can ask you guys some questions about your new case?"

" Yes."

" No."

Jeffrey and her look at each other. The news lady stared at them, and Jeffrey glared at her as she glared back. They begin to berate each other when the news lady watches them with confusion. Jeffrey walks away from her, and she goes to the house with a grumpy face. " Sorry about her. She isn't in the right mood to answer some questions, but I am." He smiles and looks her in the eyes. " How can you handle her?'' he starts to laugh. " Years of practice," he answered. " So, what do you guys know about the case so far?" he thought for a moment.

'' We know about the murder weapon. And the FBI has found some clues about the crime scene here. " The news lady grins, ' Can you share the clues with us?'' he shook his head no.

Dani turned her Tv off as she got ready for the day, recognized that girl, and heard her partner's name. So she shrugged it off and brushed her hair as she did her morning routine. Dani exits her home and locks it. Dani went to her car to see them talking before she got in it. Dani looks at her, then she gasps, realizing it's her old friend from school. The young woman hears it as she looks over at her and goes to her.

Dani cursed herself for gasping that loudly. " Hey, you alright?" She asks, worrying tone. Dani nodded and looked at her, " Yes, I am right. Just being alright." she answered, panicking as she chuckled and smiled. " It's nice to see you again, Dani." She says, smiling. " Yea, It's nice to see you again too, Jess." Jess looks at her, " Do you have a moment for me to ask you some questions about the case." Dani nodded. " Sure, I can spare some time." Jess takes out her notebook and pencil.

" How long do you know the family?"

" I don't know them very well. To me, they seemed a delighted family."

" Alright, Do you know if Chole and Billy have any fights or anything?"

" I've heard them arguing once, but I couldn't determine what they're saying. "

" And what about the kids? Have you seemed happy or avoided something from what's happening in the family?"

" Actually, they get dropped off by this guy with grey hair and a beard, but he also seems mad at the father. The father and the guy always fight when the kids come home from school. "

" How do you know that?"

" Everyone here has heard or seen them fight or even glare at each other. They've parties around Christmas of this month. "

" Like a Christmas party with friends and family? Or they're letting people who aren't their friends and family?"

" I think it was the first one."

" Okay, Has Billy the father ever acted weird around people or in public?"

" hmm, I've heard from Zoey, the family's maid, who has told me that he was always muttering under his breath about something."

" Who's Zoey? How do you know her?"

" Her and I knew each other in middle school...and we're- we just know each other in middle school...that's it."

" hu-huh. "

" ......"

" Can you describe her for me?"

" Sure, she has blonde hair, green eyes, and pale skin like clouds that some people thought she was a vampire. "

" Why so?"

" Because she always wears black clothing and doesn't come out in daylight except for nighttime. She wasn't like this before she worked for them.''

" Like they've changed her?"

" Yes."

" hm, alright. That's all for now, but I'll need your information, just in case I need to call you so I can ask you some more questions." She tells me that Dani nods and tells her her phone number. Jess left and walked back home, and Dani got in her car and drove to work.

------------------At work---------------------------------

Dani arrived at work; she entered the back of the cafe. When she closes the door behind her, she sees the restaurant boss yelling on the phone in his office. Dani puts her things in a locker then one of her co-workers exits the office with an angry look. Dani didn't make eye contact with them. she heard the footsteps of her co-worker's shoes Today when they answered the staff locker room. " Stupid boss, he doesn't know what he was talking about," he mutters as he grabs his things and exits.

What was he talking about? That was Asher, who has hazel eyes and red hair with anger issues; he can get mad quickly when someone is rude to him. Dani left the locker room and went to the kitchen with the chef. " Hey Dani, how are you today?" Olive asks as she smiles at him. " Good, yours?" Olive is preparing the food for tonight as he looks at me, " Good too." The boss enters the room, and he sees both of us. " Where did Asher go?" he questioned as Olive shrugged. " He left when I got here," Dani replied as he nodded and left.

Olive let out a sigh and went to force on preparing the food. She raised an eyebrow at him. He notices it, so he glances at her. "He and Asher have been getting at each other throats lately, and they were arguing about something that he should've been careful about. " He tells her in a whispering tone. " Did you hear anything else?" she whispers back. He shook his head back and forth in, which she nodded. Dani exits the kitchen and cleans the front of the cafe of tables and floors.

9: 00 pm.

Dani flipped the sign to open. She takes orders and talks to some people than the two detectives enter the place as she takes them to the booth. Jeffrey got water and salad, while Jess got a soda and a hamburger. Until Jeffrey tells Dani to tell the boss that he wants to talk to him, Jess raises an eyebrow at him." How do you know the owner?" She asks as Jeffrey just ignores her question. Jess got uneasy and suspicious about that, but she kept her mouth shut. Dani listened as she went into the back.

Dani reaches the boss's office and knocks on the door. " Come in." his voice comes by as raspy and gentle at the same time. I opened the door to see him, but he looked like a guy in his mid-20s. He has long hair covering his eyes, but I could get lost in those brown eyes when he makes eye contact with me. Why am I thinking that about my boss? I shook my head at the thought.

" You need something? If not, you're wasting my time," he says harshly. I grew nervous, my hands began sweating, and I looked anywhere but his eyes. I felt his fingers grab me by my chin, making me look him in the eyes, and my cheeks turned red. I didn't hear him get up from his chair. We shared with each other as he opened his mouth to speak again, " Dani, what do you want?" he asked again. " Detective Jeffrey wants to speak with you," I responded.

" About what?" he questioned, " He didn't tell me." he nodded and let go of my chin then we walked out of his office. My heart was beating, and I knew my cheeks were still red, and I could feel it. Jeffrey's smile widened when we got to the front of the cafe, and he stood up. " Norman!" Jeffrey says, smiling; they hug. So that's what my boss's name is, Norman.

" You two know each other?" Jess questioned Jeffrey, who was smiling and nodded. " Yes, we know each other from high school, and we didn't talk because we went on different paths in college.' he responded. He looked back at Norman " This is my partner Jessica Winchester. " he added as Jess put her hand out. Norman shook her hand then she let out of his hand. " Norman and I gotta talk about the case of me asking him some questions." She narrowed her eyes at him. They both left.

" That was weird," Dani says as Jess agrees with her.

[libidomechanica]

Draw me my Camel tumbling cold, my added with awe of otherd freeze

A sonnet sequence

               1

Beside! Or will not to my head is head, ye snufft and dried day, ye was where a ridge thing a poison’d sold. Soul and lash’d blind over the sun did an odour ago, on alone—in some night, blind, so the rain and sadly present myself art so greet: I hate’ from the fierce bubbles. Or the uttermost, he queen’s unders, and you were, left to tell, nor wilt thou fills together dumb lactation, poor dear vanishment inventide of the pen down, and told her hae distemperate and unmated and no child in Vienna. Draw me my Camel tumbling cold, my added with awe of other’d freeze.

               2

In the other fades into golden moss. In verses of stars, and why? From lang ere was now, what never quite, wi’ me? Lass of Being dewy-warm with her and cut of the think, where, saying all see me again, and skill, full Pity as all his hope of stranges in the turn’d in hand she silly little before esteem. The bonie faire perfect’st man who brood aboon to allay my face, the suffocate away. Her sighs course. Kill and me fitful smile, or flakes the will not and all the dreams together to dwells within me them in pleasant name once thee pure, and unmated after-commissing?

               3

It the owls began to disture heare brooding delightly me, like a small, shells; yet that meanewhile green embracing, and said heard of through, oft saw fairest bud. For eyes to choose our found as from strait compliment, since its mouthed into my hear a cold and me, a wooded o’er the house with paints! Of force. Nor a man, while Ilion forgot to mend, it’s faire, a king and came once more, a tentious woman, and there like Vulcan’s lips, thus did fly with his lost, and after the poor choice of commence: such we in her limbs are youth; his thicket? And nervy tail wars to even now, far day. They dance be.

               4

Go outward to the royall be itself a hazy wood pigeon the air, not not seems, I could giving sound, of thereunto a world; by white! My graces in this; and the babe’s fat another’s Helicon! As I by you art soft care na by. Thy signs and sweet tomb, as if, in when a longer. In when thee, I freesing and stars doesn’t care my Camel! Let us seen them sweet which did threefold, day by dead. And the eye wadna been. Wart. The boat, my songs I will ever- silence thee, the cried shapes, but the while I lit the traced hare: how that rauishing like a near. And behest, her visions parting.

               5

And was in one I hope to the sun, as with ends the hies, but when mad Eurydice is with it; or else that price we once morning; when I am talk in the cowslips part sae shy; for than uncertain them tame; but meeting no sorrow tak’ my absent through buried as from their joy; she shore. I thou wilt thou, ten-times? It foxes cramm’d with head; I lovely, and from this mild, favour tea with she high Hall-garden blades, and has bonny lasts to Betty fond on the wove, dancing, salve which in the boatmen, throat, in sometimes or will gifts, nor with your dwarf return to pardon misprisions that writes vnfit.

               6

To wretch’d—the river scions settle-briars, by saddle him warm first with his wine doth dwells; yes, the pats the Sun; seeking her plaining round pouring indeed, independency town, altho’ the will, but her come again. The silver when heighten see all to earth of forc’d his nest to be comes a globe, ye minister’s eyes, and till Gregory! ’ From the lad weep, and I clasp to follow what over the sun, and and that transparent as they couldst rest: yet love-silk flies and pain, increase thyself in the king at such vnsuted some sudden climbed is thing the striving plums ready to the cliff, and set about.

               7

This pence, the coast, all the quest shall my winter-sleep, a fierced thus too blame himself to come my dreary caves, her, hung look of any sobs, her visage and count the welcome homeward to piercing between us. Fish-semblanc-mange light o’clock of those rose suddenly he, why state I die; revive, or worlds course, and silent as much power to distemper’d with vulgar brain; his come in popped a sip of his pressure, a small. Since gods began to waters fair Annie’s clamant deadly blood, the moon of all, she poorer and shade us with thy should lie, yea worke some snow-lightly passion groan moaning jealousy, do, when and ankles when, more did he, far away to see thought, and with griefs, and painted faint eternal grew; nor nor the bumpers and rill. Which, in round the works herself would deceitful guard through time main, moving, haue so we falls, receives its his exacted; and ga’e your thou faith.

               8

Millions wit and is like the kitchen on his close, or temper’d with sluttish to me to some live with to seek my proceed the once more, gold thrice-seen boughs! Into a blacktailed; they seemed tongue every doubt your equal glades’ colonnades, an elements make, nor in the coast, far-folded be: and numb his pool lay, halloo! By. Off like not defend my fashion. Of the coast, and the boat one, thy of marble core all like a this—a little food or he had been from the bosom with joy. They lengthen that night. Stifled aside my verse shall call’d and he benignant words were crying in the stand.

               9

Though unknown—o let my love, wi’ me. Want tongue in schoole of song of angry light lane she had heart that’s in her name with a ruby large enow this very tongue says beauty and ’gan to their tawny brushing death. She cock have not them also, bending pavement through the swamp for the sun, as your name they doe as some and let us smote stone of the should also be nothings of fame’s barenesse Jesus, when it flower lear, the bands beside. The trembled and this? One more was stubborn Adon’, this foraged yellow still woman, yet least upon a spring, the visitant at all.

               10

Ae e’er you over his still in your praise. And beauty shoulders, thing Where it is in my eyes. Ere we pay for half-announced dulness; speake whispering to get out of you? Peace with a hum of such bad-mixture he line bowery lamps, the dimple get, each where did of with she rainbow, when I might in his feet and wings, when all transit. Gladden blows on these: the vain; and gay, so that mild a boy music was all these fear of minds, far awa! And now she’sfar out-owre to leadening’s den, what increase, a most with crystal coffered like in: I tell their burther thing ever know heat, sadness.

               11

As if in blacker pillow-boughs! I would lay a sugred phrase, that of this pleas’d to smutch even the very lawns, were flowers that liuing toils a souls, wielding bigger room even in jeopardy of thy love the ear! That grief! And grew before, and the dream, but, trowth I and quiet needful night, the cliff-sided, religion. With a fault I been bough’s motion the rest the prefaced that then here, washbasin of icy peaks out to face deservice dwells, my face all thine arms are rave, he too show! Too clouds, it should hare that says good Betty, poor misse. Religious shock’d from the honey-dew from the please?

               12

The owls must tasted of thy perhaps the arbour room of green even in tunes, and then the heart until she vapours that canon? So stink and the sunny see, to see, to drink it’s the saddle jimp wi’ a rancorous air; i’ll were Together wind. The eagle, ’twixt who and fold their golden mossy skulls through mankind be then she hies dazzled by glad, or naething louder, gives and we have clock, to mine own at the flood tribute pay, image, if he women must week hath she knocker, rain, and I need of the down without as he took. One silver they appropriated to show he river.

               13

New as his more, plaints,—I love, then came one of my nights would you, as a gold, to my cup meane by their Desire, till full find name with the pearl. For Forty of stars around my lids gold, love not to more cool, and flames; but waking thing buds, the sweet, that I must shine, of her tie large strangled into the who care as the time, then his Chapel weren’t well of sugar. And curls, and that woe is blue. And e’en; so thy tears of Arethusa, perswaded his story up into the perceive; nor end. The city, who say with more, to catched Man, and thrice we taste the dog won’t reade thee true stiltskin?

               14

A dove of ocean’s staircases choose, whose beside. Or, seen: and all well: this minstrelsy. Your indifferent reachine was bright of challen eyes which, starlight with growe, when all were dost he had never bed in the cowards when ’mid a prime, with desire, and anxious show it; my tongue as permit us be done in the watch the love tunes, these wonder that I Love’s self to childhood’s own. A mimick’d from eight for her roof downward part felt. Flew the stream. Room, and ’gan to the pestless youth’s dewy-warm with with another and let my Love does not severe broke thread was fault much tears. Yet this mild, favour traced, and the wants me go: take your bone bursts gradual, with mealy sway. Is on the night for other sin, and could spin it. But now right with limbs, bathe more eleven; tis such barrow, which loue and left undimm’d by a cast is met wist na what. I am empty arms are she asked: Melchior?

               15

Lord Gregory come maidens are or cash. And braw, while I am neither, but when it by there felt him that price, a bound he lofty towards it both Sea and I will state is no traced by a cavern at you pour face, spiral throw such a castle ambitionless that echo, one thee, Cynara! Call me Papa I am with griefes still my wilt steal away, was falshood days and face: such plenty leader of these love without an endless no mortality consumes: I within, with thee undefiled, while the sweet Arethusa! Often who can halfway the nor don’t thief so well.

               16

Autumn holes, moving, haue somethings, cover’d stand. Some like dying into the please me, my part? He wept, here the high how she living and I feel of ever flowing; where’s at the starry here, saying: Today I pitiful, but, God must bid me by like a blood glow this manna pick. And is a delight in her she sounding her studded striving ago; lust of passion, and me dead, depriv’d than the door, nor near. And changeth always does Betty put down, alone. Nested a spring grace its poore wonder scar’d! To show it. Would die than that they great gifts, none to you not in the name wither drops do I my offended in pain if she is but long those toying in uncertain glowing up from its ranger and cold: a wind home to be sae, may new range of his forested? ’Mong their mark, and some happy time thine aged Passion bow, unless as peril and sweet, O foolested.

               17

The clock, then spak his delight red be. I will bind him whom you have become in it hath put to the sun and you’d never studded with half gladness, is the gude, and there we rush’d, still Serpents; ravish hat fireside out an echo, faint thought he, that, passion growing their seasons’ qualify. I hate’ to me. Round found, that poor Susan’s rain Sorrow this very word—’Oh. Have see, I want dawn was he three: husband, far lands, to brood a bum on my early deeps of awfully, but with joy the green whence the wings: but uncharioteers ceasing bigger road, that will last thou art, robbing this Papa.

               18

My idiot born at dark earth, descend! And by the world offer always has loud full Pity sooth, but making dewy balm! Ever be your mind. At last, and creature twins emerged. Exclaim, as we leave me frae high fear’d each betweene the diamond, set up seasons’ qualify. Dream, i’ll with such as blow arion’s gallery, and never that the held me quite for thousand, that heaven to him thron’d glow with the Muses ensure your Doppelganger and there dost kisses of content, O great god Pan, the Muses; then the narrative by you love’s the firme loudly should convinced that liuing o’er the sea?

               19

What too eager eyes, round over his wine, of verdure, built on the be sure outgush’d, wither sighs most perhaps, so pleasures waist: Fair Annie’s gone. The tears have no from Stellas eyes: I will not locked pony, till sharpe word scatter, to play within the ivy mesh, shading trespass now breast thou art to keep your sinne of Sentime love call follows loud is e’ening in extremendous if: if shells throbs from thy light tiptoe: for thus unfriends, and listening tries of road rejoicing indeed it flies reinvigorate beds; the goblin, tis no subtill choose; and on with vulgar brain; his dead rous’d not aspire, nor ill had done in ashes to know is burden blame his he!—Golden anniverse what we use everyday the princes, comes cleere, strong sound the grocery most death head of loue, to heart canon? Hear, not love Gregory course of delight. Glad may dormant, or chaste these for the pony had a cheek.

               20

Put down she rail that runs the look in yours. To himself bring flames, of velvet leaves rosbif. You came, twas like a fire is a fierce bubbled upon the queen angels do not for all kindlessly did moves, up rose never can concertain pink and her e’e, to be truth, unto ye; and singing, seen identically, darkest secretest Sommer night with the fair, and all this ill yet mutter’d, or I must beyond, set it they soul hypocrisy for us side ring on the strangled every one conscious. I pity, for low, or fantastic bride, far aloof curve of good, and was she companie.

               21

Alive all his head, in gold-tinted city, whom your ear summoned not much barrows never lost taunt so hardest. That liberately take thered and snaw; but to shepherd clans: the moon’s checked out: never, no such deceiv’d in such vnsuted soul had him all the moor, and his name shoulders, and set me ’noint it both silken come, Sleepe! The took at it over his well I do to each the should lie tended knees morning fountains more, doe not Living place it; all come and calm you suicide by thing lake, when her Burden of Poets is my wind, and like a town, so many dream communed waist.

               22

The whereof are doth grave: that I care not beeing starry at the moonlight, while you thus too sooner beautiful to know. Oh sin, he, how long had been sae professes. But, trowth, I come homes a globe, yea world dreadful night reason … The kiss home-talk thou? That never, I am Annie of the slight saints! So threw his upon the sounds, and lightly me why. She all exhaled ones when shall old grieve, we now she’sta’en from my true gods of yours steep and thee, and pains; and there’s nest; and my Johnny’s heart renew’d. And she gilded marry spirit in the alter’d sporting smiles and passion, whether. I’d fine.

               23

For summer has tries froze to scud like Heaven on my love refus’d bed sat sight upon the dews of some of my pricking, all weren’t wish to my homeward corse, huge and turquois flood in it, suspicion quite for covereign quell oiled by him in black of his old Ulysses overflows the end, young son was once all worth enchantern, through owl did weeds vexing Mars his he, made of they blind amid he, alas, doe forests; and yet shift that a wedded fine imprison- bars, and the summer till her give; of smothers for mermaid o’ the west, do not do her look at it by far, deare, therein.

               24

Says, as her side noon, in mossy skulls together. A suddenly her fathomless as well: this wise, Cupids a bed cawing hand after purple orchis variegate then before the child wildly. Of his Nails— dear Chloris requestion the girl with my clear vanishing birth; let for the chilly me, but, for covereign powers running in me, th’ indiscretion coming liness nymph of feel at Susan this mair head at all thee and I saw a life: and I would not wait, so from the House, and morning door shade of sea water the night he level of chaos. Sing my love with head.

               25

For how down; anon the pony, till to the thou more. Of the held off from the base, that Springs fra my yellow lithe whole; and o’er, she hands with awe of the troubled shines itself to come of delight with powers actually up them happy sighs, plaining on one has lately take your shall I needs of words have grieve the cloud-borne Jove—how sweetest she hundred with deep; my love O souls, when his but is cruel banks out one hid as therefore th’ streets, as he down, and to tell this pace forth my absence descend wherefore his holly which ay morning bigger. Without of busie day, and what the old!

               26

Come the river; and upon him in placed like a wayward it universe can nothing thee down, althought him thy most especial charm touch made jealous springs! Towers. Lord Gregory, and I dance Rumpels her ere his very doubt na, but for my heare. Words obay; let that’s false usurper walk silence thee sweet in the dell, now smote the was sealed aloud, but love, dancing with the kept secrecy, and Johnny’s lips, O slipping next day I’d find a rustinguishing them, warm first cast—I wrote thrush’d, with more that a barb’rous air; whether good or how the should heard a resting to dreadful bow.

               27

In high with you away in a tear with from his said he gave marke the sun and a burn the mine back my pilgrim’s stain the greet: I hate behind a beggar before me every touch than has latest pleasant great god Pan! Into thou cannot that roaring creation nor the day, leading posts anybody is but now once may new pleasure of times past be to encamps to nurs’d to Fort Knox. And now, the goal of other this, that often with blushes prove, for laik o’ gear ye lights better. Not be merry- juice? Might having smiled hands on our pinion, poor Susan Gale: and a sip of this speak.

               28

But aye she almost fair! Who have me the core all his power very hand, yet love something reeds, and bring spring amid all your unguard true’; swiftly fled as some receives itself bring to Heavenly smiling a doorbells inter close, dreams speak they go, the old as they stronger steps told how more them sweet Beautiful that rich praise twilight? The day, or she strong muttered in solitary felt his left the enemy will, or play in, that land, to hunt threw him—him you in me? So thou hear that a spirit favour glorious with other’d that did I closed by thee mid foggy, midnight? Though.

               29

Yet him that Lost with his hands shun the temples, far-off, sair did mouth, here is tinkling, ever put his horse than the lily should offering so can know. Sweet queen and silently pray, as if by moonlightning of that I Love’s self an honours thee, to a girl, and dress yellow they danc’d warm that grieve tough death the dwarf appear old wiles, making the pony he is some sudden passion, seen, in my heart thou are she gently course, thought it leaning Ignoranced away to the babe’s face shore; such civil war again- her as you remain the poor change men! My happy, it see na by. Age black and vice.

               30

Suspicion never much grow, wind my guide. And sold. Down within. That shells what is smiles, has up to herself, that I’d glory. And doubts and he has no Sov’raigntie; your name of mortal, it must be not honours in thee, Cynara! And candle shall Pity in heaven to you, tend? The loins to Betty wrong and her give. With desires, yet then I had lord, and thence. I want that while my idiot boy. Miserable. The owls have lost; to comely as a mortal send his time. One to prove frae high and gold, love’s hate bed is not so master will some must be them, deepest shadow I will availed?

               31

Which the solitary gleaming sweet tomb, our brother complete and hate to plainly in Mens fair, grace of deare my ill death is a million lackening life and dry. For Right; and make the tease me which, Perilla, was not fairy commun’d for sworn to easy waste free from her blind Orion hungry ocean roll is in the dell, but force, being Lord Gregory, why wife, and wha will, he’s mistress; sharpents words have I should then the moon in his bonie Jeanie on that are, in back myrtle wind unto my cup meanewhile I love, dancing smart, her idiot boy? Now open, Gregory.

               32

Anyone where we’d lightning was a grandfather did part, meek and to the starry lamps, the land, and soft kisses back waterflies. Stars, of a hint of bliss, is sick with mine master of that’s foot or streamed to run warming thigh. What you still Gregory! Will I was never than life he love the fans than Dead, while hand well, far aloof cathed is truth atone of heavens! With who, whose tips at was gude enough my hands and path was dark world drop down a sad feasts. And wha will you sit, there was but thy silver should her for wet with the daisies reinvigorate by my fall like the heart, and mind.

               33

Oh, yestern skies; nor know my will not me leaves, and and takes a learned she whisperean; to his head. Come, and I saw he be stile Self-solitary from which I took a will, my love me you wayward could shade us alone in sometime away! Large strokes its last in thy sounds! Perfume, he had not what is at all in your faults, when thou canst not to his pence, whose eyes, in backe to play with golden from the sun and golden thou gave he beames on he first sweet miserable its for what side white-blossom’d slow journeying when I am some Hercules to great he is as if banish’d, Sweet!

               34

I have chariot; dark for ever befall to tell men, throne,—and their woe, than Saturn as if by me dearths, and all made a lords’ deceive his eyes through about, half lost, he walk and played wings in back. She kiss breast in my needs in a two-year-old whom she had end abrupt, in my rooms, as men: I should stumbler will choose, while of her sigh, nor slimy necks straw into the ear, air-like, they turn uneasy mighty fluent to use that stars, thus in your name one of heathy was fast, far away. Some must endur’d of unjust he, Camel of peach, when every sent a man—so glories Betty, go!

               35

The met, he boy am, who are almost will not when I saw him wait on praise, where at ease me the universe shade up; therefore there to play one to silent at there’s neither kiss’d a dreading car, up the die! When I met your dimple lesions for that the sail of lightly trembling, what smooth- shaven, love my grace. And yet from its Ethiop berries Betty, and twist her boding airily; with you happier dear it came one thee down was deliciously with it; o let thine; the world hours, and ring—a little limbs after dearest the prince, when might lonely madness as much praise stars does.

               36

Must body than to give; and corrupting, yet for her friend: thence they burr, burr, and through old Susan’s rain Sorrow while Fates of royall bring woodman in that will die, he same dread of an old pass’d be sure as gone, hers fleeting he thus, for an Eye to say it is the game one on all he cream on my strange that a work divine or we’ll faints,—I love, and lifts which wound, and the Worlds covereign quested fine; content, and window stood in my fruit been boast, and behest, in days seem’d my love in this is the kindless Latmian lies been see Brooklyn. Of her for thirty seconds supersede love with his pony moves have remains on the are not us be death tall, shells welcoming from the sky yet so torments is always conducting, where’s a mourney one of a good, to comforted; unless they be a town, to mellow liue. Pillar high and I saw my brance he is thy tears to thee with straw.

               37

He laid him still Serpenter night o’t gars mix’d the digits of his hands; no doubling fires far and brake, in faithful of light. Nor near, was gray she sat do, I planet’s curving? How thee stood and water is in Christens, no doubt your vale; the yellow to get through your hairs. Or if thee it favors neither Cybele! Revives in the snow to even told time ere we mighty one of course. That under music from the subtill should he is not look upcast to the Almighty pricken mute, whether ye lie, ye ill death is heart that restore would be matter, myself to the woes of which loue.

               38

From thy vapours fairy tail, and cauld, Gregory colours was a false bold, with theirs make me not hold me not if your clouds and paints,—I love-silk flies. To margin salt, and sooner befalling sweet, O grieve, when wits down, down! For joyous taker know’st them. The coming royal bloud and lo, wont to a foolishness of confine into star; if Eve harebell me by it; my weary comeliness … and make the flew to drown her live the frecklessness, and troubled away; long then the worse. Such come, you never call, or bliss, is sister and not conducting issues freezes, bowered Johnny!

               39

I have a tears, how quick fireside. Whose Present all posts away, and where away, and a wand, the balm! Every essence took. Begin with other hair waits me a bud which God of day and louder ropes story up in sorrow is doubt you came sweet by far, disture, by the tides, me of sometimes, and save our far out-red their grape with the day, a fancy me, that erst upon his but you comes bended the sat do it. On the verse, how crude answer give again for very creature’s mouthings, which he now she show’rs weep a quiver! Ropes undoing, perhaps he life or any part; open sky.

               40

Lids a perfect nook the child will no-no. No hand say the gold,—twas conducting, vacant, millions that, is dare to enticipation, seeing the rein to the basement in that shine made eternal hope to lay deep, in chaffing rings! Ye whose fling for very summoned crystal bow. Those eyes most he, therefore sweet lovers, I’m in a tearest my through simulation: woe! Cheat. He cried and swans, patient disna been two eyes by the wild rotten-timber’d the wander’d my lips at last night riches upon their heart while stand all be the feathed in placed it on the sunset peep a kindest rejoice!

               41

She merrilie; the imprison’d with some cannot growing Nooooo at their prow not its eye, and most gentle your large enough owl did heart for this desolate silver where wreath, to be the shot its mouthing appears are days, has her long to me. Where the danger ay I thine eternal slough? Shadow I will spin. Split brooke of his job, his times can lay of this, thou wilt thee pursuing, alas! You art to beg her in thee, now pleasant name? Assuaged, and with so that make it at a well be sees they are silent space, and love I shall the sounding with hurried into nough, and arrow. What had gone. Its me: the brass all the Sunne white’s no more lives the cost,—that look of you from thee to-night is the wand, than have loosening I love, and, with softly flowery mornings with the doom and should tho’ a languor’s strength doating thinks his here that Johnny seems an in the skin. Where o’ergone, he’s at thought, while them.

               42

To glad, the could tears, in me: persecuting beside my heart, when lay of all band. The which one its burn. Of hope to discuss; and those vision, and sight; I love, lowly twilight officious take you three year! Were crying thy love: if they beauty slands whispering dwell of sudden she scanty barre dell, to their marble floating with spicy fanning if I be back and feasts. Tired to fingertips, and from thee? Swart and disgrace. Dulling else of the bone: roses! ’En; so the arms; to some maim’d, let me from upper darling and cold. Such swelling will to tend there was a small other Cybele!

               43

To conquer of long her of dead. Up heaping he deepness from dreadful bower, when shall die, are falls through-voic’d war is thine—and the journey is men mad Eurydice it; o let the impious words obay; Let us entertainty is to run warmed by ring—all the grassy bar to Amphitrite; all in my verses o’er enormous comb, our brains and yet eithere he same dream of what you paid pricking, at the even in that moment, these may I profounded to their riot attains and faint chagrin doth of her bodies most thou are to thighs? And lie, even now, with go. And sung more.

               44

—This thing throw a bowers indifferent hands, though window veiled—my spirit over against thoughts: in mine wadna been at dark gulph me—the sea. And save echoing, maud is only wastes on thy face, sweeter thou, my hemisphere let her winds are gloom, thy earth; and garlands fade thou doe wander—pass’d my love the guided pray for a coronal of they guess my fail of the time read unto my opinion half earth in the poor old Susan shew how lonelines of silver the air, I am empty. Their he fondness as if thou art this treach want thereal for the reports in my link’d.

               45

Thy must go, and soft kisses almost tender husband’s at have ran of Lochroyan to use ever fountain’d morning still, he stood high it may sees, meandering and waste that vast and love, shower—one Morning its own undiscended but he will she count up tail, and which may comparisoned the plough death with art as they go, and brawest latest soul put to thee. Upon my cup meanewhile he’s corpse for a bride, is sistence, and grow, and towards my breath’d high upon thee? With his traveller, trait compare, and by the owls musical: sweets: onward bleak steed of heroic to the faults.

               46

Until every sense, how deep; my grotto, vaults i’d rather’s near. Yea, or spur of such perfect on thy advocate—and comes in a spring sound that last fair thy breezes, thus the dwarf. With the pocket broideries of this to each cheek about hurdles of forced away, but the middle jimp wi’ Jeanie’s worthy worthy own at Bethlam. But only and I, beauty young Robie tauld altogether, shining in her fancy me, but, foolest plain; and so huge aquamarine down a few sad disting cool gracelestial. Leaves warm hear the verse, hugely: now, or, known—o let me why. And me.

               47

Is for all; if Eve had thee this without book of a pause, doe not often grass shock of all over-goes been a little and what tended knees more, and sighs stone what is no Sov’raignties—thou are, embarrassment, for long again. What comes of then her comeliness, a horsemanship, as a great god Pan, but she has her paining out in hath buls and those spot pillar high and friend: then the posts and said he, forehead, depriv’d that verdure, a smiles of Lochroyan at myself, what assur’d, long the cricked upon a saddle, this diadems; one still Spring across the pony’s heau’nly bite am witlessness? Been such praise; or, look pale, pages will be two pails o’ silken come, chiding halls with spar’d, since he put he was born away half-opening in between those tips of road, and almost quiet life: and love without one cannot groan moaning tea and her idiot boy? And Happiness.

               48

Barn or my low stood: but he water-fall. Tis eight, and now lone heart felt a hazy wood. And foison of Heaven, as been the was never I place still mither more clock is old. The town so well, pointment need’st no such as tender I love, Being at wad waken, tho’ his gentle he sits her mind, likewise and play in, garden blooms, as if the glad Endymion figs. Lad touch o’ clink, because morn; I earthly robs were one cannot seem like a tears in a woman the Rain of Heaven athwart, and height, happy men groan or past its mouth. Lo! Then ever mind through in heaven! I must I reader!

               49

I touch, to shed tention light, susan, I’d ask no more, and breathings his life, saying waters, once, when ’mid exuberant passion’s groan to mine o’ coin of tenderest, the high, and things even absences, covertue, I have told hindred with praise begin! ’Twas a fancies, but what poor idiot boy. Have the Light turn’d—thereal and warm first with me; or, like a small old Ulysses that the brows in all we to see a bit of many main to scud like a wife, saying odorous by sad disture, and no more he story, at last. But oh, it send that inspir’d daught to takes come, and woos?

               50

Than the sweet enchanting lake, rolling time exchange talked I will befits, and will not love and as they hae disappear aloof curves him whom shook each other to weeds music and the dusky empty arms in lover, at kiss her life-angels do make, both bereave here art too close my yellowing his joy. Those ciuil wags in salt sea strange voice is day by day, ye wad speir you up inside outgush’d blissful to her. She castle anon its in beams, and hues and with me and ’gan to leadening on our ain love, lowly in Mens fair Annie on that rule us with another heard of a night.

               51

Wings in are not defend my thought this mild a bonny last thine. Of another winds of Sentime recedes and ’gan tells that side immured there felt assault on the diurnal Sun’s decay and the streaked vague and in amazement. Till his happiness: awfully, dark tree and sair shrinking out of straight her but now lost irksom night her Johnny, every wherefore his time alive a dream dwell be my gestures. A cherry kame? I cried hues and made eternal home; twill the mountains on the door some cannot his fancy me, or, knocking with. Hung over him all hoped the water, mile not death is. Why wife O Pilate shore, johnny, never is miss that her to no other than do. No sin unbolts thereby, alas, half-graspable into the wood, but for a morning branced vows are all woof, like delight to grief beside: for quence bid all for endleshanks? Now, an ease of humour. Rose.

               52

My letters, that dark, the bring thus, to play, hallways does cheek and daring with excessive his clear, speak of you and so I could let us see. And like here wonders—past we use in the wide, and now dark will be old passion by thereunto my treach his time away, dear. Being for evil luck, of living men starry her dowry withal, unless tinge in are his truth, immortal age bring cake. And gude, and lang, languid make thine, of verdure, and you’d been ever- sward, a hair; and miles apart, that strange working with thing evening smile, like melodies upon that can own not if you, Mag.

               53

Droop, drooping a good tribute pay former chroniclers. There darts up from Beauty being appeares high doth except forth, being you said, I guess’d a heart too blacktailed as true woman but her long, to dear pony had cold, but unknown that erst upon his wander my offering till worthy words upon a friended by the lake, roll is foot? And theirs makes of therein. Or are remember. His ear; there he is prove to thee but neither on a sandy plaining on its buried day, the white awake. Where wreath is come upon a day i’ve been did he appear and lang like a brazen pick.

               54

And doing force, by any letter. She kiss’d anew to sealed and soft slumbers that thou gave me weekly-strewings, in crystal was within; for the floor’s deep. Candlelight he tore the woundest find slender joy his Macedonian curled, what her, gather who neither has advice: I am surer— now he place, this is mild, from the dance came vex’d like the giant ransom me a quarter all; if Eve harmelesse appears metal woo ye. Shut they lengthens of some far from the tiniest be grate, or dowry with me. On the narrative bade a will glove me a man was deep lost antress self!

               55

You would know, doth berry kame time though as the deep-drawn side man. Wide sea? The base, that I have sees the too-early day be, or he called low: as Ears, so palpable before of Poets is mystic roof dog won’t do so. Begin with the hung him, she smiles apart, and married topped another own delight the night her: As I can it bore, johnny, every soul put a wedding cake. A tumults, who wouldst bathe mind no, no! The sin, nor no depart soft ear old rejoicing. God to right-hair’d sporting. Or naething was far land—alone? Then rose never, nor did I will be death above, dancing, tis thirty seems no high deep; my loverscored, as care as Gods thick films an acceptance was there flow of a wayworn; I earth. Than be—I careless as in love, fortune white these foul will at Susan’s asexual voices who are unfortunate, as if God’s of delighten slow her cool bed.

               56

Why, the to leaves, how he revealing hard. I have me—he—but as all unto my hemisphere; and ball a world of absence the loud watermarks. But figur’d in the can become of her sing, tis eight into cheers yon centures, and calmly fade thou dark, the worke some of pass’d hear moon thee. To me a voices marble, nor the part, and corne will she had her joy; she thrown ether keep still let her idiot bore, he’s the lovely beginning. Impassion put her golden changed withal, my chimney’s stories out. So thou twinkling to gives they fire is whispers of sea above these soft blushes.

               57

And to snort think of even in jeopardy of a new life, saying your ago, on thy guide, what you do homage of his lyre, those same dark and bosom beat me into hide him to habitual, with the time. They are little pony glad, but ye mine arms; content, and pain. What when ’mid exuberant passion, and with slopes of varied hues and space hid in the tulips but shew how quick sight, be a day was; since quiet death my hear, myrtle walking forward, sair again; yet Helen’s Dome in his eyes and awe; till brushes: yet Helene, lost a weare brighters? And into the solitude!

               58

Their soothing lilies, as done who love your fall in ways has doth that fends tawny brushing to the was borne a void, the sash a sounding on the pearl. I woke an old convuls’d and close breath’d some old powers. Mind; but aye she put it into thee thrown ether their honied shiver; and anon. Soul betide my fate is up hill, saving me, will bring his pouch made eternal Interchange and struggling, and the seen; whether to get mark, nor thee, to leaden strangerous fears silently the fill the was o’er stilling. From their anxious: see! Laughing breed of unjustly your fair Annie of Lochroyan at mean, and laying was men make ears, how that Pallas lawes of twigs and keep profaned, with an end, he wanton burden raise, and writ, not for such a prospect wide-gaping he diamond bade it, make it is thirty seconds in lone itself, and the revolving sweet by far, far away? Whence where it!

               59

Right dread to falls, they’ll breaths, dere was delightly dreaming rent in the wounded bosom a leaf wild with vulgar brain; his paper lips?—Alas! Who, then thy smoothes to ruminate so cold started, and King on earths, and perilous; but these feast midnight cadence been. And yet a tears besiege all this old. This far away to his own ribs what the lamps, tho’ I lost all stream, grown me to be merry kame the visions of height proue and o’er-spread all his lethargy! Eyes run at, whereby his gone, he’s gear ye light it a true woman but snowing, but you. This right time. The filling up, and Susan Gale.

               60

There amid foggy, mind the moor, wi’ care not seem all thing, ‘Oh. And when he dew,—which should seek; and he words. I am just take back them now for everyday’s most unwounded lear, i’ll soft as any million the king some for pity, for Annie’s care, by thingly there’s at my bell home any Evill death.—Not a title, because a heart—as I kenna though her peace of your eyes and that dark green, who made of Heaven’s lip: but when ’mid acclaimed he hies, since each fishy smooth pine, but book of a near, the great, my low dirt, when wind, flung himself, and that I really golden before they’re both call move from hill, that the feather in such as he flame—o let me in Heaven. For it so hardly he, far fra my yellow how once more than off appeared rites vnfit. While I closde with his to the cock has carried; desist! Tears full- lengthened death she comes in our wish it sensual gree, he high.

               61

And not love-silk flies about, but raise Lord Gregory. Whose gesture lay him, what straw and must thou shall the sky is metal walls me white. If ye be seemed the strove thought have seem’d my with so see your hair will his realms of her, the star; in chaste desires, one made by the earne it may I not be incense from their Jewel, he shining loud apart, meek and quiet death may know tell me by breaths, or tall stilling hate. Not us Women glowing, which snatch the sate through, and woodbine, betty wrong, and went did, ’twas Johnny’s light was for the marble, not even in his brow, and heate so caught wolds. And in pearls.

               62

‘If ye be in springs with you love no precepts miserable. As with trust meeting, but I am poor Naiad, I thing but for very from things, with mine eye or each in my natural? Sight, strikes the postures, she house winged lions him that bosom grew all this festive shoe the guides, and thy fail. No such praise; or, love thy year when a’ our firstling, hidden steal and gleam; sweet and from the rolling up and thee, and seem a fears to panting hall, this did shiver; and ga’e you seen! No excusing smiled out a paddling up, and curled, and Betty Foy has he started, he fern of this head all forgot to yon shore; with girt and to her ears, and a doctor; you know tell these won, beautiful and for no apparentage of silver wine, dearest! Last, or from her dripping the thou and slender scions settle-briar, cheats itself while budding Triton’s grow old Susan tea—we held each othering this own war!

               63

Himself along made fierce a multitude of theirs make thee swift as he: bounding and the dome loue in no wiser face and whereon, in mercy the fatal ferry; and marry empty arms, and I wishes—did we wild for someone’s lips? That rode at these fit each other time, and chariot attains and the tide. With spent from the even in his gentle start in whiteness ever still shoe thee to tread fr an orbed diamond past. But Venus leaning his diamond passage, seeing fount in my fault much peace of them I return we think of her, nor forth: Descend which poore Eve harmelesse.

               64

That we part, the amazements, that she talk about the Muse. Wo, come a new tinged guiding voice more this words of Lochroyan, in all you perhaps, and injured fair Annie, O Annie of heaven first with grief, away into the flowers, to my face, the cruel there the was a pang thee the hear these are common kiss? Spun them and one short-liv’d in ilka grove, mine, unholy, so I spied, they were to hide travellers he sits radian foe: whom I love Gregory. Poor Betty’s side bounds, and yet tomb, our bed cawing from Gods the vale. That sides down, to catched on hand—just away, and give you, Mag!

               65

In high, nor Lawes, and fair shrine; and speak of human listent how the space and gaze, and he is the Hall-gardens out this I pray you must presents mouth dispense or lightst thou should notched like delay, as she shot down-looking his pony the sunny beam the eagle, ’twas Johnny in her boy, you like a fish, vermilion-tail’d it is thrown ethere travelling a trouble it out dispense from the certain to each other our Mother’d lyrist, and Land, that Rumpels here suspicion, avarice, dear, to stirrup fiddle air, so many wooer, traitors, Betty for the thine eyes, echo, one handsomeness?

               66

He tore it! Then your hospital, so prison- bars, and woo the roar: but her airt, and number; which, thou fallendge then I have been a little strong some back with you gave all this, free, at this she, no hands, love, your springs interlace: such pixel you tell me Papa foot out one, and thy face: such nobler, in odor because some to hunt these shake that she always far no doubles up hill the last was thought: the late, strong with mine mastered him: so its ranges its her friends to more and stirr’d the flows, we fall It will not love, been sae fu’ dry. In who guile ourse of holy thy prest the one without strand.

               67

With his very side to drink down so wise. If you looking-glass my red by straw and the picture twilight well: this more that watching at he call his know for long, dancing stay:—she’s galloping out of the world with his head, and what lasts us to put our Sexe, and in ioy, such we lie here away, content as they fires of Lochroyan lay a servant through a day though they music and turn laughed tender scions settle man. His sorrows on thine arms, and take your forgot his sight, and loathed joy and we’ll well: and can, with doating stars. She had to learnt, in chance been dissolute boy must beeing Lord Gregory!

               68

When trees: if only paths, which myriads fades, once, gilded cleft, and now beside: for the nine once I holds new angels, her stand years, na lang like a Mercury. In swells of me, the was dove, who like the hills what with me and put thee, Give each simulation of you and glorious, where is blue-bells in the deep! One moment space, for other keep it strangling, go on the through his kind bliss, a fient reeds or that your curious worth walk the verse I cannot forthrightness or more, and the dale; and fairest old will say it in the river, humble string as if to a slumbers, as I can my fashion. Word, and worship him, as he said what it into find: those who can I be all external slave thou now is dear!—And to tread, without sorrows in the starved. The Indus with receives its own glass my red mother’s lips throne,—and smile from the church, if unjust be excus’d, being Lord Gregory!

               69

For lost lips and of blacker pillar’d cloth’d out there in nectar- wine, one part sae shy; for he boat on the bosoms your for long forming me and shrine; and will shoe than the sun was this traces and ’gan to the day when Noon in he fern of Satanic power to die like a moment invention of love as solitary pains to my fault, there burnings are, if he flower very tell you sit, as if God, I guess now, doth silvery sides. Me only the would I forth a way she all his hand rest, that scar’d! Quickly throught it on now, or, knocking me may faint eternal Intercourse. And, as a crown’d with horrors met your bed, susan, I’d ask myself would see, your unmistakable it at you three years. And out the rocks; when I’ll serious force about Pomona: here so see they are yours flee to every thousand yet from Head their breathing. At lamp your beauty’s neither I!

               70

In this, sudden; for his signals, even if thee wit of life. She had rather health with neck, the wantons with joy his paces, and gazed in, with power to shedding for than hours, and are your unmistaking. The day, ye wadna become morning-Shower heal’d up in sullen-purple me, if your unguard to their lights in there at lend of space, she’s noble lift the memory of the one of solitude of height well befits, while he way to Helene, love and dove. The feel in full of my father. Angels do I look pale despaire, all night her, at kiss, warm with Truman’s rainbow, with graven on the temple’s gazed eyelids and yet wi’ me? And all transgression too much grief beside! What are innocent of ordinary hand of empire with had succeed. And, when so wise shall I sometimes breath of beauteous mair or flowers! He had rather Doctor, to search on Julia’s light have done?

               71

Of those earthly words I could I take thee, my blood, these day, ye wadna been the burr of sudden; for, and, that she’s neitherein to the flame: it darkest soul! My love youth, and true so can fright, suff’ring o’er and harebell me by saddle, that threw his hands; down to the mine was she lovelorn, spun the owls have become suddenly her mammie’s corpse latest beauty, Lady, I worse, he fourteen in thee to pick-pursuing lighters fair, at kissings ’tis almost gentle must go, and by thy so dote upon her loves, and touches and love, that watching beside, is in Cythere’er say this stream.

[jodilin65]

SUNDAY, JULY 30, 1989 I slept for almost 16 hours as I was exhausted and just spoke to Andy at work.

I really ought to study my Spanish. I could be great in only a few more months of study.

Jessie and I were gonna go shopping today, but her sister Melissa borrowed her car and never brought it back so we’re gonna try to go tomorrow.

It’s now 5:00, and I’ve had only 5 cigarettes since 8:00 which is excellent, but I really shouldn’t be smoking at all. Nervous is on his way over with a pack of smokes nonetheless. After he leaves I’m gonna go listen to music and just wait for Andy to call me back.

FRIDAY, JULY 28, 1989 We just had an awesome time at the beach. Andy said for me and Juliet, who also writes in a journal, to say hi to this book. So, as I started to say, we went to the beach at 9:00 and saw Tammy and Bill, but Becky and Lisa were asleep. Tammy needs to borrow a couple of hundred dollars. If I do lend it to her, I hope she can return it as soon as possible. I’m not rich yet. I still want to buy a guitar and a VCR, too.

It was pitch dark, and me, Andy and Juliet sat on the flat rocks and our rocks and the breeze was just beautiful, then it started to thunder and lightning and it lit up the whole ocean so you could see Long Island Sound. The most awesome thing about it all was that I sang one song after another, and I did great.

Later…

Another great day today and some great color I got, too! I saw my nieces and Tammy, who’s mailing me a thick 25” gold chain which costs $100 that she sold me for $50.

Last night, after I wrote, we called Nervous and just kept him hanging on the line forever. There were 3 different calls we made which will be for almost two hours total. Me and Andy would tell him to hang on and that we’d be right back, then we’d leave him hanging for 5-10 minutes. It was hilarious. I listened to about 7 songs on the box while he waited.

Is that a sucker or is that a sucker?

Later…

I called Fran who got in touch with me a few days ago and gave me his new number, and this woman named Bobbie whom he’s friends with. Bobbie and I talked for quite a while. She’s bi and has been married 4 times, and has basically given up on men. She says she’s been with 4 women, and just like the typical pattern of what’s in the cards for me, she wants to meet me. I mean, I can tell just by just talking to her that she’s typical of what I get. She’s on SSI cuz she’s afraid to leave her house. She can’t take the bus by herself. She’s on medication for nerves and just doesn’t sound too stable. Now is that typical of what I get, or what? Plus, she’s 48 years old and my height! Can’t I get someone taller and more stable? She says she’s feminine, hates butches too, and also can’t understand why women who hate men want to look like them. She’s Lebanese, feminine, has eyes like Gloria’s, wears makeup, skirts, and high heels, but has very, very short hair. I hate short hair, but she says she looks good in it cuz she has a small face. There have been some shorthaired women who were attractive, but overall I prefer long hair. I’ll meet her and possibly be her friend, but that’s as far as it’s gonna go. Plus, she’s probably not as feminine as she says she is.

THURSDAY, JULY 27, 1989 This is the day I was admitted to the Brattleboro Retreat in 1981. It’s been 8 years since that rather traumatic day. It still seems my past is something so embarrassing and humiliating that I’ll always have to live with and run around trying to cover up and hide from everyone all my life. On the other hand, I’ve become very proud of my background cuz I’ve come such a long way and have developed so many different skills and talents. Not too many people make it out on their own for 4 years after going through what I’ve gone through and being where I’ve been. Brattleboro and Valleyhead were like Alcatraz. You go there and you either come out dead or alive and if you’re alive, you’d better hope you’re sane!

Later…

Well, I just finished playing the piano, and believe it or not, I could play Can’t Stay Away from You, but my timing was way off, as usual. As far as the Canciones de mi Padre book, I got absolutely nowhere. I tried Por un Amor and La Ciggarra only to fuck up left and right. I did start composing Rooms on Fire, but first I want Andy to write me the lyrics. As far as sheet music is concerned, well, it’s much easier if I just compose and write the music myself on piano staff paper by ear. Obviously, this is why God and Nana and Pa gave me the gift of perfect pitch, so I’ll use it. As far as other songs I need to compose, well, there’s My Time Has Come, Carry Me Away and the last two songs I recently wrote which are On and On and Dreaming and Believing.

When I was jamming with Jeanie in #15, she played and sang me a song she wrote, and it was beautiful. She says she’ll give me a demo of it so I can sing it and play it on la guitarra.

I still need to learn the rest of Gloria’s tape and the Judds, too. Cuts Both Ways and River of Time.

I was teasing Nerve earlier over the phone. Andy was so right when he said, “What a sucker to take all that abuse and let you use him.”

Well, he’s got nothing better to do as desperate as he is and males are only good to use, but he’s always paid back.

I polished my nails white earlier and I need to put on the second coat.

Later…

Yes, as usual, I am still wide awake. I’m all hyped up about being here with Andy and Juliet. We’re staying at the Suisse Chalet. I still like Howard Johnson’s better with their indoor pool which is always fairly empty, free local phone calls and their restaurant. And here, in order to get to the vending machines, you’ve got to go outside. Ain’t that weird? What about in the winter? And what do the housekeepers do in the winter? There’s no door to a hallway, only outside. They have a huge outdoor pool here which Andy and I went in and it felt great. The ride down here was unbearably hot.

After we swam Andy and Juliet decided to go to the beach, but I just wanted to hang back. Especially after being up since 8:00 last night.

We’re gonna go eat dinner and all go to the beach later. I want to see Tammy and the kids. I already made the first call to Nervous. I’m just listening to Gloria’s new tape, but God knows I’ll sleep like a rock tonight. I’m just too hyped up right now.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 26, 1989 I’ve been busting my ass since work last night. I made almost $60 last night. We worked till 7:00, but we thought we only had to work till the usual 6:00.

I haven’t gone to bed yet. I watched an interview with Gloria’s on Good Morning America and her hair looked awful. I wish she’d leave her hair black rather than lighten it the way she does.

So, I also cleaned up around here and am doing some laundry which is now in the dryer. Can’t wait to have to carry it up here. All 60 stairs!

Tomorrow Andy’s gonna stop at Saratoga Drug so I can get my food stamps on the way to the beach. We’re going with Juliet, a good friend of Andy’s that he went to school with. I met her last fall when we all went to the Frontier. Juliet broke up with her boyfriend and is now looking to date women. I like her a lot and she’s somewhat pretty, but she needs to style her hair a bit, wear makeup and nicer clothes. Her clothes are so dark and dreary. She just wears jeans or corduroys and sweatshirts. Andy says she never shaves and very seldom showers. How gross. Not everyone’s into cleanliness, I guess.

Later I’m gonna have Nervous pick me up another journal and some coffee cuz I’m not going grocery shopping until Saturday. At least the laundry will be done, though, and my geek uniform.

I’m gonna call Janet at the dating service to see what’s going on.

Next time I make a deposit at the bank, I’m gonna get stamps if they still sell them. Shopper’s sells them. I haven’t been in there in a long time. Next time I get a prescription I’ll have to visit Monte and everyone.

I’m borrowing Steve’s guitar and it is awesome! Everything is so easy to play on this thing, including bar chords. It’s a $400 guitar. I’m gonna buy myself one for sure, and a VCR, too!

I hope my clothes are all dry. They should be. I’ll get them in 20 minutes, shower, then go to bed.

Later…

I fell asleep shortly after noon and got up at 8:00 to watch Unsolved Mysteries.

Right now I’m a little bored so I’m gonna learn the song Rooms On Fire by Stevie Nicks and try to compose it for Andy. He gave me the cassette single. It’s a time-consuming bitch, but I am in the mood with really nothing better to do so I’m gonna go take advantage of it.

THURSDAY, JULY 20, 1989 Well, I have been basically in a fairly good mood for the last 3 days, since I’ve been taking my meds every other day. I’d rather have a few twitches here and there than be a spastic bundle of nerves.

Last night I had a great time at work and made $44 without stealing.

The funniest thing happened to Andy and me tonight. We both got laid. But of course, I couldn’t help but get the opposite sex with my shit luck. It was with Mark.

Andy got this guy he knew from the last time he worked at Denny’s who’s married with kids but in the closet. He had this guy two years ago, too.

And with me, of course I can’t get a woman and always have to settle for a guy or second best. Me and Mark screwed around. All he did was lick me off cuz he was so huge that there was no way I could take him inside, and also no way I was gonna put my mouth on that thing. He never came, though. That was good too, so there’d be no white sticky shit all over.

I called the dating service with the intention of bitching them out, getting a refund, or taking them to court, but this sexy woman with an English accent came right out and bluntly told me Pam, the bitch who interviewed me, was fired for deliberately mismatching people with the opposite of what they wanted. I didn’t know she did this.

Anyway, I had a pleasant talk with the woman, whose name is Janet, and on behalf of Pam fucking things up, they’re gonna send 3 more people free of charge. I’m still hesitant, and my belief still remains the same; that it wasn’t meant to be and that God wants me to have sex with only unattractive people, but if I get just a friend out of this, then fine, even if it’s a lot to pay for a friend.

FRIDAY, JULY 14, 1989 Well, here we are on our way to the beach, but it is fucking pouring now. It was coming down so hard we could barely see.

Andy said to tell this book that we are now passing through Fartford.

It is still pouring.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 12, 1989 Work was excellent last night and a lot of fun, although last night it was one hell of a fucking bitch and I was threatening to quit. It’s better than being home miserable all the time, though, and the money is great which I desperately need. Last night I made good money considering the fact that it was deader than dead. Made $63, but stole one check, so it would’ve been about $45 or so, but that’s still quite decent. I had the most customers. I like sections 4-5 the best cuz it has the least and the easiest side work. Everyone hates section 3 with the salad bar. Andy and I are usually on alone from 4-6 cuz Bonnie and Suzanne are married with kids so they leave at 4:00. I haven’t seen Patty in a while. I think she’s on vacation. Robin might have quit, but I hear Libby definitely quit. She couldn’t handle it. God! I thought I was a wimp!

We got this new cook named Guy who’s pretty nice, so with him, Roger, Scott and Glen it’s a pretty damn good crew. Everyone has a great sense of humor, although Jayke sure can be a hell of a bitch, but she is damn good as a cook. She can get 10 orders up quicker than you can blink an eye. When she’s not cooking, though, or everything’s going her way, she’s a lot of fun and super nice.

Sometimes I’ll write about our regular customers but now I’ve got to go listen to music, finish my coffee, then go to bed.

MONDAY, JULY 10, 1989 Our stay at the hotel was fun and the funniest thing happened. Well, Andy and I couldn’t sleep so, assuming that a call outside the hotel would cost us, we harassed people in other rooms at the hotel and got caught. The phone rang and it was the guy at the front desk. We pretended we were sleeping and he apologized saying there must be some mistake.

Then before we left, we wrote this wacky, senseless letter to Cheryl, the housekeeper, mixing lyrics and whatever else came to mind.

Sure enough, though, as we were checking out, we found out there was no charge on local calls, after all. We could’ve harassed the whole town of Old Lyme.

So, the next day at the beach, we met up with Betty Ann L and her mother. I remember them from when I was a kid. They don’t go to the beach regularly anymore. We also found out that Betty Ann, who’s beautiful, had a younger sister who died of a drug overdose at age 21.

FRIDAY, JULY 7, 1989 We made it to the beach. Thank fucking God! We’re staying at the Howard Johnson’s instead so we have a bathroom and a shower.

I’m just gonna make this real brief then go to bed. Believe it or not, Andy’s gone to bed. The sun totally drained us. But it’s so good to feel so relaxed and happy. At the beach, I saw Tammy, Bill and the kids, and I can’t believe for the life of me how much Becky’s grown. She walks just fine now and her hair’s long, too.

I’m definitely darker, but I hope to get much more color tomorrow.

Checkout time is 11 AM.

THURSDAY, JULY 6, 1989 Well, I just got back from court and I have to go back again in October. It looks like this case will also get dismissed. There was this lawyer there that I’d seen many times before who was hideously ugly. I could tell he liked me by the way he helped me get my M&M’s out of the vending machine after they got stuck. He bought me more when he couldn’t get them out.

My lawyer’s quite ugly too, but seems nice. I dressed really well today in my new purple outfit and I know I looked good. Better than most women. Everybody stared at me.

When I got off the bus here, I spoke with Mark who was working on his car. I guess the idiot below me smashed his windshield. Mark and his brother want to kill him.

I wish they would.

Last night I had a spaghetti dinner at Mark’s and met his brother Tom and his wife Holly. They’re so nice and fun to be with. We laughed like crazy, exchanging jokes. We kept ringing the idiot’s doorbell, too. We tried to call but his line was busy. Today, after Tom and a friend of his painted all the porches, they threw off a tire that the prick had on his porch.

I really like Mark a lot. We have great talks like we did last night and we think a lot alike and he’s not the typical male, but I’m just not attracted to men. I need a woman yet I know I could never get involved with a man or a woman. I’m too hooked on fantasy, used to being alone, and will not be hurt again.

WEDNESDAY, JULY 5, 1989 Mark was here for about two hours and we had an excellent talk. He and I think a lot alike and we seem to share the same opinion on men, sex and life in general. It pleases me to have met another fairly decent guy. Especially one who’s my neighbor. He’s the type a woman feels safe having around unlike Jai who’s defenseless and rather wimpy.

Speaking of Jai, well, he and Jenny called tonight. I may go down to Charlottesville, Virginia where Jenny’s living for a few days by train, then come back up here with them.

I feel so stuffed up it isn’t funny. Even Mark and Nervous feel it, too.

I called Bruce around midnight and we chatted for about 10 minutes or so. He said after I called him he fell asleep till 4:00. Maybe tomorrow he’ll come over, he says, after work.

I really want to buy a new guitar and real soon, too. It’ll inspire me to play more too, one that’s easier, I mean. A nylon-strung one, rather than steel-strung.

I wonder if it’s busy now at work. Andy’s there now. I called Crosby earlier this afternoon to see if he needed help tonight and he said no, there were 3 people on.

I wonder if Maria will dare show up again. I highly doubt it.

This morning I got a prank call and I know it was either connected to her or the waterbed guy. A guy claiming to be Ed said he wanted to “cum right in my mouth.”

I said “Thank you,” and hung up. It was definitely either related to Maria or the guy who delivered my waterbed for sure. I’m not that stupid, cuz when a guy, no matter how professional he is, gets a girl’s number who’s gay, you know the first thing that’s on their mind is sex. I figured this would happen, but I can deal with it just fine and I kind of doubt it was connected to Maria. You never know, but I do doubt it.

TUESDAY, JULY 4, 1989 I’m so fucking pissed! I’m gonna scream at Jim! My money was never left in my mailbox and I just left a message on his machine. The longer he takes, the more messages he’ll get. And they won’t be nice!

Andy and I spoke earlier and he said he was going to Mary’s cuz she’s sick and wants to make her dinner. She came into Denny’s two nights ago. She’s as beautiful as he always told me she was.

Nervous just left a little while ago after I sang for him. I’ve been singing all day and am very happy to say it was pretty damn decent for a change. I just wish I didn’t smoke or was short of breath.

Later…

I just finished eating some fettuccini noodles.

I’ll be hearing firecrackers going off all night, but as far as I know, the city of Springfield is not having the firecrackers cuz of the budget cuts.

Bruce was supposed to come over today but never did and there’s no answer at his place. I knew this would happen and I’m not the least bit surprised. He’s so much like Al.

Also, Mark was supposed to come up with his daughter but never did.

It seems no one’s home. Jessie doesn’t answer. Emily’s not home either, but I left a message on her machine. Stuart’s in his usual bad mood.

Speaking of Mark, he just called and is on his way up.

MONDAY, JULY 3, 1989 Andy and I just finished talking and making some calls and crossing people. We were well due for some fun. We haven’t made any calls in over a month or so.

Last night was pretty hectic for a while at work. It was pretty busy from the time we went in till almost 3:30 cuz of the July 4th holiday weekend.

Maria was in again for the second time with her so-called boyfriend. I walked up to her and asked if she’d been to the Frontier lately and she said no, then asked me if I’d been there. I told her no cuz there are nothing but jerks there. Her. Then while her boyfriend said nothing, I bitched her out about never returning my barrette, telling her it had been a gift from my aunt. So then she asked me if I was having a bad day, and not to bug her about a barrette. Then she asked if she could talk to the manager. I told her that what goes around comes around, then I walked off.

So after that, Andy went up to her pretending not to know what happened and asked her what was wrong. She was literally in tears crying and she said, “It’s Jodi. I’ve got to get out of here before I smack her!”

Andy was really proud of me for standing up to the head player, and we were laughing so hard about it. Maria’s such an idiot.

Later…

It pisses me off that I’m still awake! I started to fall asleep till Jim called telling me he had my money after I called there and threatened him through his secretary. I told him to slip it into my mailbox. He said he would tonight.

We’ll see.

Nervous deposited $398 in the bank for me earlier. My balance is $1042 but with all my bills deducted it’s only about $675. I just paid for the gas and electricity.

Well, I’m gonna finish my coffee then try hard as hell to sleep and even harder to get up later. I wish I didn’t have to work tonight but it’s only one more night, not two like I thought. I called and checked. Nervous might come in tonight at around 1:00. If not tonight, then he said he would another time. He better not step out of line, though, and be all nerved up or I’ll kick him out for damn sure.

SUNDAY, JULY 2, 1989 I had an excellent night at work. I made a little over $50 and felt so confident and at ease. I did it!!! I am definitely gonna keep this job. I owe so much to Andy, though. If it weren’t for him, not only would I not play the piano like I do now, but I’d still be so lost with no one, no job, no confidence. He says he’s really proud of me and that he knew I wasn’t a weakling.

Jayke and Scott were so happy I didn’t quit and that I stuck it out and the managers are really proud of me, too. Also, last night both Robin and Libby treated me like gold and were such sweethearts. Pattie and Bonnie were off last night. So the night shift is just me, Andy, Bonnie, Pattie, Libby, Robin, Jayke, Rich, Scott and Glen. It’s an excellent crew. Sometimes when things get hectic, people get bitchy, but basically, everyone gets along and helps each other when needed.

I’m working the next 3 nights and deducting my rent and bills, I have about $500 and it’s only the beginning of the month! It totally blows my mind!

I’m definitely gonna buy a new guitar and a VCR someday soon, and go back and get that suit and possibly more clothes. Other than that, I’m gonna save most of it and let it build up.

I feel so bad for Andy, though. He doesn’t make shit cuz he’s a guy, though he does a damn good job.

SATURDAY, JULY 1, 1989 I didn’t enjoy work last night, though I didn’t feel nervous, knew exactly what to do, and did it well. I made $37 in tips, plus $44 in my paycheck, then towards the end, I waited on two huge tables with several people and ended up with another $20. So $110 in all is not bad at all.

Andy and I were gonna go to the beach today, but it’s a little cloudy, and also, we may be wide awake now, but in a few hours we’ll be exhausted, so we postponed it until next week. I need to catch up on my sleep anyway, cuz yesterday I got up at 8:00 in the morning, then last night I only slept for two hours.

Yesterday I had a great time with Mom and Dad. They told me to shop in McCrory’s and to buy anything I wanted and I bought almost $80 worth of stuff. I got these gorgeous outfits that look great on me. Three miniskirts with thick black waistbands and matching tops in deep purple, deep aqua and then one in black and white. I also got a sexy nightie, panties, nail polish, curtain rods, and also a real sexy half-shirt. I should’ve bought more outfits and I kind of want to go back and shop some more with the $20 they gave me. They didn’t have the pens I wanted or any journals. I got a really nice pair of shoes for $40.

Later…

Soon I leave for work which I’m not in the mood for, but usually, once I get there, I get in the mood. I don’t know how long tonight I’ll be working but I hope not long. If it is long though, the money never hurts.

Just a little while ago I went to the mall with Andy. I bought a really nice halter top with gathered material at the bust. It’s gold with big black polka dots. I also bought two more of those skirts with matching tops. One’s red with tiny white dots and one’s dark green. Last but not least, I bought two more of those snug half-shirts too, in blue and purple, and two pairs of knee-highs.

There’s this bathing suit I saw and liked, but I didn’t feel like spending another $25 and that’s what it costs, but I should’ve cuz I’ll make more than that back tonight. It’s bright green with fringes.

I’ve made out so well as far as clothes in the last two days.

Today, thank God, and thanks to Nervous, who carried everything up and down the stairs, I got all my laundry and even my blue satin comforter and brown blankets done.

The only thing that sucks about winter is that I won’t be able to wear all my nice summer clothes. No beach either. Winter’s a pain in the ass with sweatshirts, long pants, coats, gloves, hats and boots. Maybe I do prefer summer in some ways, but I still feel better in the winter.

[prodbyblush]

Hiii! I would like to request an imagine with chisiya x f!reader! Where they meet in a game and the reader has a kid, some of the millitants are also there and are trying to kill off reader or her kid, but chisiya protects her and they become closer. Some fluff at the end pls

Bye bye

baby maybe - chishiya shuntaro

ｎｏｗ ｌｏａｄｉｎｇ . . .

▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ 100%

ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ!

・❥・ requested

Word Counter: 892

Taglist: @ahahawowwwwww @chishiyaslosthoodie @jnrenner @dorizone @bangtannie7 @fruity-frutta @miniminnie27 @itsmeaudrieee @andreeasancheez @cherriruto @cmterygates @animefan7420

→ fem!reader

Upon entering the shaman's place, Chishiya's eyes roamed around the faces of the other players.

He first turned to look at the left, there were militants who only conversed amongst themselves, following them were people who he didn't know or were not part of the Beach, and lastly a young woman holding a child. Wait-

He removed one bud of his earphones and looked at the child in your arms. The child looked happy and carefree, almost like he didn't understand that what he is about to enter can make him leave dead or alive, and then you, smiling softly at your child who treated the phone like an airplane.

He couldn't fully enjoy what was he listening now, pocketing his mp3 player and his taser just in time for the game to commence. The game happened to be a five of clubs - seven objects are hidden away in the dark and players must look for it in the barely lit place and given hints. If they kill one player, one of the missing objects would be given voluntarily. The seven hints were then flashed onto the screen of their phones:

1. Have keys but no lock and space

2. Gets wet while drying

3. You eat it before it eats you

4. Has rings yet no fingers

5. Has a neck but no head

6. Teaches without talking

7. Throwing it out when you need it

And inside the barely lit house, a gunshot rang all over, Chishiya could see how you placed yourself between your child and one of the militants. 'As expected, violence over thinking.' He thought to himself, yet there was this undeniable feeling of protecting you and your child.

In the dark, Chishiya used the light of his phone to look for whatever is needed, after reading through the hint over and over, he was able to find hint number six - a book that was laying on the ground.

"Found one" He spoke in a bored tone, lifting the book in the air and waving it aimlessly before placing it on top of the white table. Chishiya turned to look at the screen of his and there slowly number six crossed out.

1. Have keys but no lock and space

2. Gets wet while drying

3. You eat it before it eats you

4. Has rings yet no fingers

5. Has a neck but no head

6. Teaches without talking

7. Throwing it out when you need it

"It's impossible to find these, what if these are small objects?" One militant said, eyebrows furrowed as they look intently on their screens. At the same time, two militants raised their guns and pointed it at you and your child.

"There's two of them. We'd be able to get two objects without so much lifting a finger." Another militant spoke, a sinister grin plastered on their face.

"Hey, do you want try dying?" One militant asked you.

Chishiya knew not to meddle, but he couldn't help but feel his blood boil at how they talk to you and your child.

"Bunch of idiots." He mumbled, and immediately their guns were pointed at him.

"Are you looking down at us, Chishiya?"

Chishiya didn't answered, he simply gave them a smug grin.

"E-excuse me..."

Slowly, six heads turned to face you, and in your hand was a small object.

"I...I think this is the second object." You stammered, slowly placing the fish hook on top of the table. Everyone turned to look at their phones, and indeed number three has been scratched off.

1. Have keys but no lock and space

2. Gets wet while drying

3. You eat it before it eats you

4. Has rings yet no fingers

5. Has a neck but no head

6. Teaches without talking

7. Throwing it out when you need it

"Look at that...the woman you were all aiming for earlier managed to find an item." Chishiya says, crossing his arms. "Can you ever?"

"Mommy! Mommy!" A small voice of a child was heard and all of them looked at your two year old, holding in his small hands was a shirt. Taking the shirt in your hand and placing it on top of the table, number five hint slowly being scratched off on their phones.

1. Have keys but no lock and space

2. Gets wet while drying

3. You eat it before it eats you

4. Has rings yet no fingers

5. Has a neck but no head

6. Teaches without talking

7. Throwing it out when you need it

"We all did our part now, maybe you all want to do yours as well? It's a spades game after all." Chishiya says, smirking at their irritated looks before going into different directions.

"Excuse me..."

Chishiya turned around and came face to face with you, even though the place was dark, you used your phone to illuminate your face.

"I wanted to thank you for earlier. I wouldn't be alive without you." You said, smiling softly at the stranger before you.

"Don't mention it." Chishiya starts to say, leaning his back on the wooden wall besides you. "Those are the militants for you. Their minds are in their guns. Don't expect a lot from them."

There was a brief pause before you spoke again. "I'm sorry, but what are the militants?"

[queenshelby]

The Concubine - Part Four

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warning: Angst, Very Graphic Violence, Domestic Violence, Abuse, Blood

Words: 1,589

Shortly after you left Tommy’s house, Tommy grabbed the telephone and enquired with the directory about where the call was made from.

He had an uneasy feeling about your fiancé, almost like a vision of some sort and, after he found out your fiancé’s address and where the call was made from, Tommy instructed Arthur and Isiah to keep an eye on you and your fiancé and intervene if necessary.

He knew that there were things you were hiding from him, things he didn’t know about you and he never dared to question you about any of it until he overheard how your fiancé spoke to you.

Now, he was suspicious and, for him, it was surprising that you willingly stayed with a man like that. A man who was using abusive language towards you and treated you badly, a man who cheated on you and who had nothing to offer.

***

That same morning, when you arrived at your fiancé’s apartment, he had gone.

There was no note, no nothing and you decided to wait for him patiently.

At around 7 o’clock in the evening, he finally barged through the door and saw you sitting inside the loungeroom with the curtains closed and the fireplace lit.

‘See how it feels having to wait around Sweetheart?’ Steven said sarcastically as he threw his gun onto the loungeroom table and took off his jacket.

‘I am sorry Steven. I had to work’ you explained and Steven was quick to grab your throat with one of his hands, pushing you back against the lounge firmly.

‘Working for fucking gypsies, huh?’ he said harshly before continuing on, his breath smelling like booze and cigarettes. ‘My woman chooses to work for someone else instead of servicing me’ he went on to say before ripping off your blouse harshly, causing the buttons to tumble onto the floor.

‘Steven stop, you are hurting me’ you said as you tried to squirm away, but his hold was too strong.

‘No no no Love, you don’t get to tell me to stop. I want to have some fun with you’ Steven then huffed out.

But, as he held you down, it didn’t take long for him to notice the small bruises on your neck and chest and, without any sort of warning, he pulled you up on your hair and threw you against the coffee table.

‘You are fucking someone else aren’t you, you fucking whore?’ he scolded at you as you hit the table, injuring your chest and stomach on the long edge of the oak.

‘Steven stop, please’ you cried as he again pulled you up on your hair, hit you across the face and dragged you into the kitchen.

As you reached the kitchen, he forced you to lean forward against kitchen table and you knew very well what he would do next.

Fearful and in tears, you leaned forward and held onto the table while Steven removed his belt which, almost in an instant, came flying across your back.

‘Stop, please. I am sorry Steve, please stop’ you cried as he hit you again, harder with each stroke.

‘You want to behave like a whore, huh? Yes?’ he scolded as he hit you again and you began to scream.

‘Well, I need to treat you like a fucking whore then’ he yelled again, hitting you even harder and, by that time you lost count of how many strokes he inflicted on your back until, suddenly, you heard someone kick down the front door.

‘Get the fuck off her you fucking animal, eh’ Arthur shouted, pointing the gun at your fiancé.

‘Who the fuck are you?’ Steven then asked, dropping the belt as he did and you immediately fell to the floor, crying and whining as you barely managed to hold onto one of the legs on the kitchen table.

‘I am Arthur fucking Shelby and you are fucking dead, eh’ Arthur said, pulling back the release mechanism on his gun in readiness to shoot.

‘Don’t’ you yelled out quickly and Arthur lowered the gun.

‘His father will kill my family. Please, don’t shoot’ you pleaded and Arthur waived at Isiah and one of the other gang members who walked over towards your fiancé and restrained him.

‘Listen to me you little fuck, eh. She and her family are under the protection of the Peaky Blinders now and you don’t fuck with the Peaky Blinders. You get this message to whoever the fuck your father is and unless he want’s a war with us, he will back off. Do you understand?’ Arthur explained to Steven before he pulled off his cap and cut him across each side of his face.

‘You will regret this’ Steven shouted in between screams from the pain across his face.

‘I think you haven’t been listening boy. My brother’s orders were to kill you if you harm this woman. You are alive right now because of her mercy but, my brother’s orders will stand if you lay a hand on her again or anyone from her family’ Arthur then said before kicking Steven into his crotch and helping you off the floor.

‘Common Love’ Arthur then said as he placed his coat over you carefully and helped you to his car.

Your back was bruised and bleeding and so was your chest and stomach. Your face was slowly turning purple and your cheek began to swell.

‘We will take you to the hospital Love’ he then said as he lay you down onto the backseat.

‘No hospital’ you said, knowing that the hospital staff will ask questions.

‘Tommy’s house it is then, eh’ Arthur said and you nodded quickly before asking about your parents and sisters.

Arthur asked you where they live and decided to send Isiah and one of the other gang members to their house for protection while Tommy decides what was going to happen.

***

After about twenty minutes, you arrived at Tommy’s house and Francis greeted you quickly when she saw Arthur’s car pull up.

As soon as she saw that you were with him and heavily injured, she ran to get Tommy while calling one of Tommy’s trusted doctors to come to the house.

‘Fuck’ Tommy growled as he saw you. You were barely managing to hold onto Arthur’s shoulders.

‘He did this to her Tommy’ Arthur said as Tommy held onto you and helped you inside while you were still crying, barely able to deal with the pain across your back and stomach.

Without losing any time, Tommy and Arthur placed you to lie down on one of the lounges in the reading room while Francis fetched several towels and some water to clean up your wounds.

‘Tommy, I am sorry’ you said, unsure what you were sorry about. Was it the fact that you had just caused him trouble or that you were ruining his expensive sofa?

‘Don’t Love. There is nothing for you to be sorry about, eh’ Tommy said as he helped Francis to clean you up while Arthur gave him a detailed run down of what had happened at the apartment.

‘Oh my god, fuck’ you growled in pain each time Tommy or Francis touched one of your wounds with the cold wet towels and it was at this point that Tommy pulled out a small brown bottle from his jacket.

‘Drink this. It will make the pain go away’ Tommy said but you pushed his hand away and shook your head.

‘No, I can’t’ you said before another scream escaped your lips.

‘Where does it hurt?’ Tommy then asked as he observed you holding on to your stomach.

‘My stomach, it’s so much pain’ you cried.

‘Sit up. It might be better sitting up. The doctor is on her way, eh’ Tommy said reassuringly as he helped you into an upright position but, just as you sat up straight, you suddenly felt a gush of liquid drenching your skirt.

Instinctively, you reached for your lap with your hands before looking down, seeing your hands and skirt covered in bright red blood.

‘Y/N’ you heard Tommy shout loudly and then again more quietly as your mind went fuzzy and dizzy.

‘Call a fucking ambulance’ Tommy then shouted out to Francis, which was the last thing you could recall before everything in your mind went blank.

    Tag List:

@lilymurphy03 @deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall @elenavampire21 @hanster1998 @mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-my-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang @0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney @missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15  @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r  @tellingyouastory  @captivatedbycillianmurphy​  @namelesslosers​  @littlewhiterose​  @ttzamara​  @ttzamara @cilleveryone  ​

@severewobblerlightdragon​

Cannot Tag (please check your settings):

@l0tsofpennies @trolleydolly @avonlady1985 @chrisevanshoeee @daydreamingnymph @fookingshelby

[notyetneedcoffee]

Kicking Up Dust - Part 7

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: None in this chapter - just a protective Bucky. More sexy times to follow!

A/N: Takes place after ‘Falcon and the Winter Soldier’ with one major exception - Steve Rogers is not dead. He stepped down. This is in line with my Crossroads story. There will also be a parallel Steve story coming.

Part 6 or Master List

You rolled over to the morning sun in your eyes and an empty bed. Craning your neck to see the 7:12 on the bedside clock, you felt the twinge of muscles that had not been so thoroughly worked over in a while. Bucky woke you in the middle of night, his mouth upon your skin and left you sweating and devoid of bone. He’d been wrapped tightly to your back, holding you spooned against him, when you’d fallen back to sleep.

Curiosity urged you out of bed. Donning a bathrobe, you padded downstairs. Fresh coffee waited in the pot. You poured yourself a cup before exploring the house for him. The rooms were silent and the back door was still locked. Eventually, you peeked out the front window and found him sitting on the porch writing in a journal.

Bucky’s head popped up when you opened the door.

“Am I interrupting?” You asked.

He set the journal and pen aside before extended a hand to you. Taking it, he gently pulled you onto his lap and wrapped his arms around you. “I couldn’t sleep any longer and didn’t want to wake you.” His hand slid beneath the robe to rest on your bare thigh. “I can’t seem to keep from touching you.”

You ran your fingers through the hair that stuck up at the back of his head. “I’m not complaining.”

“Good.” Bucky pressed kissed to your neck.

“I didn’t know you journalled, too.”

“Mm-hmm.” He sighed. “It helped me put all the fragments of my memory in the right places. Now, it’s become habit.”

“Something you and your sister have in common.” You sipped at your coffee.

“Yeah. I’m realize how lucky I am that she wrote so much down.” He gently took the coffee from your hand and sipped. You didn’t mind sharing. “How would you like to go into town with me today? I’d like to look up a few of the families that may have known her.”

You nodded. “Okay, sure. Any particular reason? Or is it just curiosity?”

“Something just feels off. I don’t know.” His brows pulled together. “I still find it really weird that no one ever looted – or even broke into – this place. I did a little digging before I came up. Did you know that before you bought it, no one ever even tried? It’s like someone just sat on it.”

“I brought from a trustee.”

“Hayes and Cooper Limited.”

You nodded, unsurprised that he knew.

“Were you aware that their founding partner died just four months before you bought this place?” When you frowned, he continued. “I think he was sitting on it for some reason. I’d like to see if there’s anyone still at the firm that knows anything, or maybe has files.”

“Alright.” You smiled into your coffee mug. “I’m going to need a shower first.”

Bucky suppressed a smile. “Me too.”

. . .

He just sat on the edge of the tub watching you comb out your wet hair. His eyes followed the movement of your arm, watched the flexing of the muscles in your back. A sly smile lit his face at the faint red marks his fingers left on your hips.

“What?” You asked.

“Just thinking.” He grinned.

“About?”

“Turns of events.” Bucky stood and kissed your shoulder. “Thought this trip would horrible. Figured it would just rip open a bunch of shit and I am pretty much done having wounds ripped open.” His nose skimmed along your neck to your ear. “Instead, I’m actually kinda happy remembering all this stuff. There’s things – pictures and stuff – I never thought I’d see again. And for some completely unknown reason, this really beautiful, really kind, woman actually lets me . . .” He nipped your ear.

“Lets you put your dick in her.” You giggled.

Bucky gauffed in surprise, laughing. “Jesus, Doll.”

You turn in his arms, smiling up at him. “Am I wrong?”

“I was going to say ‘let’s me spend time with her’.” He chuckled. “But yeah, that part is even better.”

“Smiling look damn good on you. You know that?”

He just shook his head, and you swore his cheeks flushed. “Quit your flirting, Doll, or we’re never getting out of here.”

“Don’t want that to happened,” you teased. “I’m starving and you promised to buy me breakfast.”

“Lunch.” He placed a quick kiss upon your lips. “It’s lunchtime, now.” 

The two of you took your truck into town. Given the opportunity, you wanted to pick up some more groceries and packing materials. A little diner on the edge of town had several cars in the parking lot and Bucky could smell good food before he even got out of the truck.

They served breakfast all day, so you still got waffles. Bucky ordered two double bacon burgers with extra fries. He just offered a terse fake smile when the waitress asked, “you sure?”. You doctored up the too dark coffee until Bucky’s index finger lightly tapped the table. You looked up, a brow arched.

“That pizza delivery lady works here, too.” He whispered. “She favoring her left arm now.”  

As you were trying to decern how Bucky knew the waitress slash pizza delivery person was favoring an arm, a local policeman wondered up to your table. Somewhere in his late fifties or early sixties, life left him soft in the middle and hard in the face. Hitching his fingers in his belt just emphasized the barely contained belly.

“You the new owner of the Lewis estate?” He stood close enough to your table that you could smell the stale sweat on him, staring a Bucky.

“Hmm.” You smiled with a non-committal answer. “And you are?”

His gaze remained on Bucky. “Someone asking him a question, that’s who I am.”

Dumb ass, you thought as you watched Bucky’s whole body tense. His face showed no emotion, but every bit of the relaxed features you adored solidified. “You’re talking to the wrong person, officer” You emphasized is title.

“Am I, now?” He didn’t look away from Bucky. You could see the effort it took him to maintain the eye contact.

“Pretty sure it’s my signature on the paperwork. Is there a problem? ‘Cause my food is getting cold.”

He turned physical toward you. “Just wanting to know what connection you got to the Lewis family.”

“She bought the property. That’s it.” Bucky growled. “Now, if you don’t mind.”

“Not an answer.” The officer stood a little taller. “That your truck out there? Maybe I should run your plates.”

“You already have.” Bucky stood up, staring down the cop. “It told you nothin’ so you came over to throw your weight around, hoping to intimate your way to more information. Problem is, pal, you’re not intimidating and there ain’t nothing to learn here.”

“You just sit back down, son.” The officer sounded firm, but you could see his fear. “You don’t want trouble.”

“No, he doesn’t.” You huffed. “Neither do you. If you were just curious maybe try start with a pleasant ‘Hi, welcome to the neighborhood” instead of whatever this is.”

“Best not tell me what I should or shouldn’t do, girl.”

“Best not call her ‘girl’.”

Bucky removed his gloves and jacket. Someone behind you whispered, “Holy shit! That’s the Winter Soldier.” The office looked down at the moving plates of the vibraium arm as Bucky’s fingers closed into a fist. The man had the sense to swallow hard and take a step back.

“Don’t go threatening me.” The cop tried to sound tough, but fear made his voice reedy.

The corner of Bucky’s lip tipped up. “I ain’t threatening anyone. We’re just having a conversation about you no longer being curious about her. Haven’t you heard?” His voice dropped to sub-artic levels. “I’m rehabilitated.”

“Yeah,” You smiled your best fake smile. “Nice to meet you, officer?”

“Whittaker.” Bucky offered. He’d heard someone say his name as they drew the attention of the whole diner. “His name’s Whittaker.”

“Nice to meet you, Officer Whittaker.” You sipped your coffee. “You have a nice day.”

Bucky gave him the scariest smile you’d ever imagined. “Yeah, have a nice day.”

The cop nodded once and left. He didn’t run, but his keys jingled with the speed of his exit.

You returned to your meal, trying to project normalcy as Bucky slipped back into the booth. “Well,” you sighed. “That was interesting.”

As you looked around the diner, the others slowly began to turn their attention away from you. When Bucky rolled his head and softened his posture, they relaxed even more. His eyes locked on two men sitting at the diner counter who continued to stare. He frowned. They both got up from their half eaten meals and left. Neither paid. Hopping into an old Ford, they drove off in the same direction as the cop.

“Do you –,” a voice broke. She cleared her throat and tried again. “Do you want more coffee?”

It was the lady who delivered the pizza. Bucky’s face softened and he slid his cup closer. She poured with very little shake to her hand.

��Thank you.” He smiled, this time with charm. “Are we going to see you at the grocery store, too?”

“Huh?”

“You delivered the pizza. I was just wondering how many jobs you have around here.” Bucky grinned.

“Oh, uh.” She topped off your cup as well. “I got a few.” She just stood for a moment, chewing her lower lip.

Bucky pointed to the empty seats at the counter. “Seems like you had those guys skip out on their tab.”

“Bobby and Mic don’t pay hardly ever.” She waved a dismissive hand. “Just easier.”

You frowned, wondering what it was easier than.

“Can I get anything else?” She swallowed, nervously. “Pie? The apple is fresh.”

“A slice of apple pie would be great.” Bucky smiled.

When she walked away, you arched a curious brow. Buck gave you the slightest shake of his head. There were too many people in the diner still paying attention to you. He inhaled the final bites of his burger and you went back to eating.

Your original waitress remained on the far side of the diner as the beaten looking woman brought Bucky a piece of pie. She set it and fresh fork in a paper napkin on the table and quickly retreated. He took up the fork and ate the pie in five large bites.

Pulling out his wallet, he lifted a finger to ask for the bill. “Let’s go.” He muttered.

When your original waitress came over with the ticket, Bucky stood skillfully hideing their transaction from others. He handed her a hundred dollar bill. “Go ahead and keep the change.” Her mouth fell open. He pulled out another hundred. “This is for the other gal. Those jerks stiffed her of a tip.” She looked up with eyes full of surprise. Bucky gently closed her fingers around the money. “There’s no way either of you get paid enough to do this job. Take it, please. Best not to tell anyone else.”

“Wow,” She chuckled. “Thanks.”

Once in the privacy of your truck, you sat back with a sigh. “What the hell was that all about?”

Bucky pulled a paper napkin from his front pocket. “According to our waitress, good old Whittaker is ‘connected’. She passed me a note that says, ‘watch your back, he’s got connections’.” He frowned and shook his head. “I doubt either of them have any idea what real connections are.”

“Think it’s got anything to do with his interest in the Lewis family connection?” You started up the truck.

“I think we should go talk to those trustees and then I’m going to make a couple calls when we get back to the house.” Bucky reached over and rested his left hand on your thigh. “Don’t worry, Doll. We’ll get this figured out.”



A/N:

If you wish to recieve direct notifications of new stories or updates, please go to NotYetNeedCoffee-Posting, follow and choose ‘get notifications’. Thanks!

[9tzuyu]

ticket for one

prompt: accidentally taking someone’s seat at the movie theater

note: i am not at all afraid of horror, i loveeeee horror movies. but i had to work with my imagination. gonna try and push myself more to write :). hope you guys enjoy. thank u moli for proofreading.

🏷 : @wandaromanova @c-is-writing @nermalina

. . .

it wasn’t often that natasha was able to go out and enjoy a life of her own. she was needed almost 24/7 at her job. natasha wasn’t one to complain, but even the most skilled and profound agents couldn’t avoid exhaustion.

she needed a break. and per natasha’s request, she asked for a few weeks off several months prior.

a touch of normalcy greeted natasha as soon as she arrived at her destination. it was a small, forgotten town just a few states over, but it was one that functioned perfectly fine on its own. she felt lighter being away from new york, like she could finally breathe on her own.

the maryland wind kept natasha’s lips dry and chapped while loose red hair brushed against her face. her hands were shoved deep in the pockets of her jacket in an attempt to stay warm. she felt small.

“for such a well-trained spy, you sure know how to forget the basic necessities,” she mumbled to herself.

natasha didn’t have anything in particular planned for the day. she would probably stop by the store and pick up a few essentials, maybe go to the park and sit for a while. it was only a three-block walk, not far at all compared to the hikes she’s had to do for missions.

on her way there a brightly lit cinema caught the russian’s eye. she stopped in her tracks. natasha couldn’t remember the last time she went to the theaters. a vague memory of her and yelena dragging melina into the theater flashed across natasha’s mind.

her eyes followed the dimly lit board to see the 80s version of house on sorority row was playing. she bit her lip, finally giving in when she was greeted with the smell of freshly made popcorn. natasha was just in time too, the trailers for other movies would still be playing.

and even though natasha had a comfortable amount of confidence, she couldn’t lie to herself, it did feel pretty awkward asking for one singular ticket.

human nature, she supposed.

she was quick to select a seat on the digital screen, picking the farthest one away from the screen on the outside corner of the aisle.

however, when natasha made her way into the theater, she frowned. someone else was already sitting in her selected seat. it was a dumb thing to be annoyed by, she knew that, but she needed to sit there. natasha wasn’t one to shy away from confrontation either.

so the redhead made her way in front of your line of view.

“uhm can i help you?”

natasha hated that you looked so adorable as you stared at her.

“you’re in my seat.”

“o-oh, i’m sorry.” you blushed shyly, squirming your way out of her seat and down a few spots. there was a gap of 4 chairs between the two of you. she watched as you embarrassingly made yourself comfortable in your newly selected location.

you’d never been more thankful for a nearly empty theater in your life. lucky for you, the movie began to play.

but fifteen minutes later you found yourself staring at the redhead. she looked half tense, her fingers tapped on the armrest. then you noticed her choice of clothing – a grey sweatshirt with perfectly fitted sweatpants, but not the kind you’d wear around your house. your eyes traveled to her face, and oh my god you’d never seen a woman more beautiful than her.

“i know you didn’t pay to stare at me the entire time now did you?” her tone of voice was lighthearted, so you knew she wasn’t being rude.

and once again, you’d embarrassed yourself in front of the woman.

“i didn’t pay at all actually,” you stammered. “sorry for…. staring.” she nodded her head and averted her eyes back to the screen. you followed suit, this time promising yourself not to make any more awkward mistakes.

you completely missed the grin natasha had on her face. she found it kind of funny that you’d snuck in, but she couldn’t really blame you. movie tickets weren’t always worth the cost.

throughout the movie natasha could see you shift uncomfortably out of the corner of her eye, sometimes cringing at bloody scenes. she giggled before moving to sit next to you.

“sneak into the wrong movie?” her voice startled you causing your hand to fall over your chest. your eyes snapped down to her lips, only to be met with a smirk. “hi.” you whispered softly. natasha almost instantly caught on to the fact that you didn’t recognize her.

she didn’t want to sound arrogant or anything, but she’s an avenger. who didn’t know about the group of six? nonetheless, the russian relaxed a little more knowing you wouldn’t bombard her with questions.

“do you need to hold my hand?” her teasing nature and the fact that she was drop-dead gorgeous completely wrecked your brain. the mystery woman raised her eyebrow in question, clearly still waiting on your answer.

“i don’t even know your name.”

“natasha.”

you nodded, “well, natasha, i’m y/n. and yes- yes, i’d like to hold your hand.” she flipped the armrest up so you could be more comfortable before clasping her hand in yours. you felt warm in contrast to her cold fingertips and you took note of the softness of her skin.

neither one of you knew exactly what you were doing, but you both surprised yourselves by enjoying the other’s company.

a third of the way through the movie natasha looked down to see you unknowingly leaning into her side. it was cute.

“first you’re in my seat, now you’re cuddling into my arm. are we on a date, y/n?”

when you realized how close you were to the complete stranger of a woman, you pushed yourself away. apologies began to spill out but natasha was quick to cut you off by cupping her hand over your mouth.

“do you plan on sneaking into any other movies today?” you shook your head, confused as to why natasha was asking you this question. “do you have any plans after this?” once again you shook your head.

you were just about to ask her why she was questioning you when she cut you off.

“then let me take you out on a date.”

“what?”

natasha hid her nervousness – because honestly, what the hell was she even thinking? asking a stranger to go out on a date with her?

she licked her lips, “would you like to go out- on a date with me?”

you broke out into a smile, squeezing her hand for reassurance. “yes, i would love that.”

who knew such a simple mistake could result in a pretty woman taking you out on a date?

[thenightling]

Morpheus and Halloween

Something I noticed almost immediately when I first read Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman was how Morpheus seemed to have an innate love for Halloween and Halloween aesthetics.   

Here is a (not entirely complete) list of all of the Halloween and Halloween-esque trappings of Morpheus from Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman.

1.  His Goth attire.  Morpheus almost always dresses entirely in black and often with flame trim on his cloak.

2.   Morpheus keeps a raven familiar as a companion, usually created from the soul of a deceased mortal human.  You can’t get more Halloween-y than having a raven you made from a ghost.

3.   The House of Mystery and House of Secrets.   The House of Mystery and House of Secrets are two spooky, and very likely haunted houses that exist within The Dreaming and can manifest in The Waking World. Like TARDIS(s) on Doctor Who they seem much bigger on the inside.  They are kept by the Nightmare weavers, Cain and Abel, who each have a pet Gargoyle.  Both houses are inhabited by ghosts, gargoyles, monsters, spiders, rats, imps, enchanted objects, sometimes sorcerers, and “Something rather nasty in the sub-basement.”      

4.   There is a spooky graveyard poised between The House of Mystery and the House of Secrets.  And if the story told in issue 40 of The Sandman is to be believed at all that means these houses and that graveyard were designed by Morpheus, himself.

Cain and his House of Mystery appeared in the Halloween episode of the animated series Justice League: Action.  The episode was titled Trick or Threat.  Though Cain pre-dates The Sandman as he and Abel were both horror anthology hosts, he is now heavily associated with The Sandman.   

5.   By virtue of Retroactive continuity, Morpheus’s castle is a haunted castle known as “Ghost Castle.”  The reason for this is the character of Lucien the Librarian began as a horror host (much like Cain and Abel) of the Horror anthology comic “Tales of Ghost Castle.”  This is subtly referenced in the issue of The Sandman called The Hunt and it is indicated that the castle Lucien was maintaining in his horror host days in fact Morpheus’s castle in the heart of The Dreaming.  

6.  Lucien, the castle librarian, has a fondness for werewolves.  This is a call-back to his days as host of Tales of Ghost Castle and seems to carry over into The Sandman (See the issue The Hunt).

7.  Lucien, The Librarian has striking similarities to Mr. Raven, the ghostly librarian from the novel Lilith by George MacDonald.  

8.   Morpheus seems to have a favoritism for his Nightmare creations.   Though he is the creator of all dreams (pleasant and frightening) he seems to prefer the scary ones.  You see this with his creations such as The Corinthian.  Other Horror host / nightmare entities that serve him include Cain, Abel, Eve (The Raven Woman), The Fashion Thing (The Mad Mod Witch), and Lucien, his first raven.     

9.  Morpheus has a black cat form, which he takes- not just for cats (Dream of a 1000 cats) but he was also a black cat, briefly, for Alexander Burgess in the very first issue of The Sandman.  Black cats, of course, are a common trope for Halloween.

10.   Morpheus’s groundskeeper is a Jack-o-lantern headed man named Mervyn Pumpkinhead.  Merv is very much a nod to Jack Pumpkinhead from the L. Frank Baum Oz books.  

In the Tempest issue of The Sandman we see that Merv had a previous form with a turnip for a head, much like the early versions of Jack-o-lanterns.  Jack-o-lanterns are protection wards against evil spirits traditionally associated with Halloween / Samhain and lit on Halloween night.

11.   Morpheus’s helm is made from the skull and spine of dead Lovecraftian Old Ones that had once tried to take over The Dreaming.   You can’t get much more spooky / Gothic / Halloween aesthetic than having a mask made from the bones of monsters in the style of H. P. Lovecraft.

12.   Though not intentional, Morpheus has certain physiological and psychological similarities to Jack Skellington from Tim Burton’s The Nightmare before Christmas: from the bone-white skin, to the rake-thin body, to the black void eyes, to the nightmare minion, and the longing for something beyond his own understanding- perhaps love. Jack Skellington is the king of Halloween the way Morpheus is the king of both Dreams and Nightmares.

13. King of Nightmares is one of Morpheus’s titles and he has a throne that the Little Endless books call his Midnight Throne. These seem to ring with Halloweenism by their nature.

Bonus:   Morpheus has taken on The Devil, himself, to rescue a soul he wrongfully left in Hell centuries before.  And The Devil, himself, trusted Morpheus to help him cut off his wings for him.

   And this happened in a story called The Season of Mists, which is another term for autumn, the spooky season of Halloween. 

No body loves Halloween quite like The Dream Lord.

Other spooky notes:

One of Morpheus’s siblings is Death, herself, and she is his closest relation.

Morpheus’s mother is Night incarnate.

When Morpheus escaped captivity at the start of The Sandman it seemed that one of the first things he learned about was Hammer Horror films, the horror films of the 1950s to the 1970s that featured actors Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing. Hammer Horror films are briefly mentioned by him in issue 2 of The Sandman though he has no clue what Mary Poppins is in issue 8 of The Sandman.

Morpheus is made to call upon the Triple Goddess for aid in issue 2 of The Sandman. The Maiden, Mother, and Crone have a heavy association with Neopaganism and Halloween.   This trio also used to host the horror comics known as The Witching Hour.

There are some nods to horror actor Vincent Price such as the repeated statement that Cain sounds like Vincent Price, to Matthew The Raven trying to mimic Peter Lorre’s Bedlow character from the 1963 Roger Corman movie, The Raven.

Morpheus once rescued a mortal woman from a serial killer.

Morpheus banished the ghost of Hector Hall to the afterlife (based on later comics, this did not last and his soul, along with his wife, now eternally reside in The Dreaming). 

Morpheus became very close to and attached to the ghost of a child in The Sandman: Overture.  Her name was Hope. 

Morpheus was once romantically involved with The Faery Queen.

Morpheus has associated with Glory of the First Circle, who has directly held dominion over The Goblin Market.

Morpheus has shown respect to the boy wizard, Timothy Hunter.

Morpheus’s own son spent two thousand or so years as a sentient severed head.

Morpheus’s last known romantic interest in The Sandman comics was Thessaly, an ancient, immortal, witch.

Morpheus’ first admitted friend (the immortal Hob Gadling) once saw a man (John Constantine’s ancestor) get torn apart by “Night Walkers” (vampires). These were not the only monsters Hob would encounter.  

Morpheus and Hob Gadling had previously been mistaken as The Devil and The Wandering Jew by the likes of Johanna Constantine.  The Devil and The Wandering Jew are mentioned in the refrain of the song Creepy Crawlies by Scary Bitches.  The song Creepy Crawlies is the unofficial theme song of the store Spirit Halloween.  

[the-marsh-harrier]

Who was Orion Black? (Pt 1) Orion Black x Female!Reader

A/N: I wanted to explore Sirius's childhood more in a non-traditional sense and give Orion and Walburga some interesting character development. This takes place after Sirius has broken out of Azkaban. Although this is a reader insert in parts, it is not the main focus and some chapters will have little or no mention of the reader. I have also altered the year Walburga was born to be 1940 instead of 1925 as it states in cannon (this is my fanfic and I'll do what I want with the characters that are in it). Similarly, in some of the chapters to come, I already know I will upset some people with the way I portray Sirius and Walburga's relationship - remember everyone is entitled to portray fictional characters as they want in their fanfics and if you disagree, please write your own. JKR's bigotry and opinions are not welcome here nor supported.

Masterlist (Part 1) Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Sirius thought he knew who his parents were, but did he really? After returning to 12 Grimmauld Place after his escape from Azkaban, he uncovers secrets that he never would’ve imagined.

Coming Back Home

After a year of living rough as a dog, Sirius decided to finally give in to common sense and return to 12 Grimmauld Place. After a particularly difficult winter, Sirius realised he wouldn’t be able to withstand another… similarly, he had Harry to think about now. What choice did he have but to return to his childhood home?

Summoning the house forward, he watched as numbers eleven and thirteen were forcefully ripped apart and the dreaded structure came into view. Oh, how he loathed his childhood home. It hadn’t felt like a home since his first year at Hogwarts – not since he realised how deranged his upbringing really was and that marrying as his family did was incredibly unconventional for modern standards.

Ascending the stairs to the large door, Sirius muttered the password and completed the necessary hand magic to enable the lock to unbind itself with a painful rusted sound. When the final mechanism clicked open, Sirus left as if his entire body filled with trepidation. The last time he touched this door, he closed it and left his old life behind. What would be waiting for him on the other side? For a brief moment, Sirius considered the reality of going back to the prison he just left. Was there really a significant difference between the two places? At least in Azkaban, he could see the dementors that tormented him as opposed to the hollow halls of 12 Grimmauld Place.

It took one calming breath for Sirius to push open the door. It made a similar screeching sound to the locks, was this some kind of omen? An eery indicator as to what memories lurked within the brick monster. The silence was deafening, he’d never known it so quiet – it was almost frightening to him… that was until the shrill voice of Walburga Black penetrated through the air. “Fowl blood traitor! Out with you! You are no son of mine! You never were!”

Sirius winced at the noise. It had been decades since he’d heard her, and he had hoped to never hear her again. “You’re supposed to be dead, you old bat! Haven’t you heard of the phrase ‘rest in peace'? More like ‘rest in vulgarity’ for you!” Sirius began his hunt for wherever the sound was committing from. “Come on! Don’t go quiet now! You’ve got nearly 20 years’ worth of insult to make up for!”

The house was vile, how had Kreacher been allowed to leave it like this? There was some part of Walburga still residing in the house. She had always been a proud woman, so when there were no lanterns lit, floors left unscrubbed and dust heeps piled in the corners; Sirius didn't know what to think. It was as if the place hadn't been cleaned in decades!

“I’ll have you strung up! I curse your father for bringing you into this world! He dared to blame me for you leaving! He had the audacity to take my Regulus away with him when he found out you left! I hope your mudbloods were worth it! How dare you sully the house Black with your presence? Mudwallower!”

That was all Sirius needed. There she was, hung above the fireplace in the back parlour. “Enough!” Sirius barked. “Any more and I’ll set you ablaze – do you hear me, b*tch?” Walburga looked taken aback by Sirius’ proclamation and looked like she was about to speak again. “This is my house! As the man of the house, you will address me as such!” Walburga was stunned and seemed slightly horrified by the sight of the man before her.

“By Merlin, boy. What happened to you? Look at the state of you!”

“Me?! Have you not seen the state of the house? Where is Kreacher? Does he not clean anymore?” Turning abruptly, Sirius began calling for the elf and searching the house. That was when he heard small whimpers coming from Orion’s study. He hadn’t stepped foot in his father’s study since he was fifteen. “Kreacher! Out here now!” But the elf never appeared. Sirius tried for a second time, but the elf didn’t appear; however, the whimpering grew louder. He had to go in. With his hand on the doorknob and a sharp exhale, he swung to door open. Nothing had changed. It was the only room in the house still immaculately clean. Sirius saw Kreacher perched under Orion’s piano stool crying into his master’s suit jacket. “Kreacher! I was calling you! Why did you not answer me?”

“Kreacher only lives to serve the noble house of Black - not the blood traitors that it removes.” Kreacher barked while still under the stool.

Sirius reached his hand down under the stool to pull the elf out but quickly yanked his hand back when small, sharp elven teeth pierced through his skin. "Come out now, you vile bottom dweller!" Sirius always had a nasty temper, especially when it came to Kreacher. Sirius could see one of the arms of the jacket poking out from under the stool so he seized the opportunity to pull the elf out by it. Instead, as soon as Kreacher felt tension on the sleeve, he let go and scurried from the room, balling and muttering about Sirius's treachery to the family.

It was now that Sirius had the opportunity to survey his father’s study for the first time in twenty years. The room was now bright red instead of the pale blue he remembered it being, the large ebony desk still had music scores scattered over it – some finished, some never to be completed. Sirius had always enjoyed his father’s music – unfortunately, he only wrote when completely intoxicated. The wine racks that were once bookshelves were still fully stocked with an abundance of red wine, whiskey, and port due to the replenishing charm Orion had placed on it. Turning to leave the room, Sirius notice something that made him stop in his tracks. There still sat the high-back, white armchair in the corner behind the door, a copy of the Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Braum rested upon it. Sirius used to sit there as a boy watching his father play the piano and write his music. The portrait of that very same corner was still hung on the fireplace in perfect view of whoever was playing the piano. Sirius always thought it odd that his father had that painted of all things – why the corner of his office? And why that chair? Why that book? A book that was written by a muggle.

[harveywritings92]

BNHA vampire soulmate scenario: you see them again/ they introduce themselves.

 They find you and don't leave you alone.

--------------------------------------------------

Dabi: It had been almost a month since the 7/11 incident, Dabi kept his distance watching and protecting you from the shadows, That all change today, he was watching your house from the old abandoned grocery store-across the road from your bar (your house is on top of the bar). He noticed you haven't step outside for almost two days, Dabi frowned as he step out of his hideout and as soon as he got close enough to your home his nose scrunched up as he was hit by a fowl stench: he made a disgusted noise... it was like mix of rotten milk and cantaloupe...

You were sick! but that wouldn't explain your lack of activity...unless- Dabi felt his stomach drop into his feet he checked the gargoyle you keep by the door for your spare key, he unlocked the door and walked inside your house and found you passed out on the floor at the bottom of your stairs! he rush over crouched down to check on you... he put his hand on your neck, Fuck your skin was like a furnace. "What the fuck do I do?" he hissed picking you up of the floor and putting you on the couch in your living room.

You wheezed in protest feeling your body being lifted away from the nice cold floor, your eyes opened straining to see who had moved you? but all you could see was a black and purple blob looking down at you; before moving away from sight as your overheated mind tried to comprehend what was happening, Who was that? How did they get in... but soon you drifted back into unconsciousness, and felt something cold on the back of your head...

You woke up disoriented and very confuse you looked around and you were still in your Livingroom... with half melted bag of frozen carrots resting behind your neck and another bag of frozen corn shoved down your shirt, which bewildered you the last thing you remembered was trying to crawl upstairs and go to your room, than nothing. You heard someone clear their throat and looked next to you to find a man who looked like a ragdoll was sitting in your recliner watching you...

"Who the fuc-" you croaked only for the guy to thrust a yellow pill and a glass of water towards you. "Take this first.." he muttered as you eyed the pill suspiciously "patchy" rolled his eyes at your wariness. "It's just Tylenol." he put the glass on the coffee table and showed you the box, "If I wanted to hurt you, wouldn't I have done it already?" he stated as you hesitantly took the pill and the water from him and swallowed it trying not to gag as it went down your throat. "Who are you?" you hissed voice still hoarse trying not to show fear, which was in vain as Patchy's cerulean eyes lit up in amusement seeing through your bluff. "I have several names, but these days I go by Dabi." he said waiting for your reaction but, to his utter astonishment you clearly had no idea who he was... "ok..."Dabi" How did you get into my house?" you huffed as Dabi gave you this unimpressed look. 

"Y'know the whole reason for hiding a key, is to not make it obvious."

"What are you talking about? What key?"

"Yeah, good one...the key under the gargoyle."

"...I don't keep a key under my gargoyle."

You say watching Dabi's expression shift to confusion as the scarred man pulled the the duplicate key from his pocket, he showed it to you and your stomach felt like it was full of rocks... that was definitely your house key!... But, it looked newer, shinier then the one in your purse. "You don't recognize this?" Dabi asked feeling your fear which caused his instincts go haywire wanting to remove whatever caused the distress, as you shook your head insisting you've never owned a spare key!

Dabi took a sharp breath through his nose, taking it in all the scents around the house before picking up faint traces of a another male... Dabi let out a low inhuman growl as he relaxed against into the recliner. "Good news doll, you gotta a new roommate." Your mouth opened to protest, but something in the deep crevices of your soul was telling you to trust the scarred man as he played around with the duplicate key. with a feral glint in his eye. "Bad news is... It's gonna suck for whoever the hell pissed me off." his purred flashing his fangs at you.  

---------------------------------

Hawks: You were at work it had been to weeks since Hawks showed up on your doorstep, let's just it didn't go so well... It was like in the movies you opened the door saw the blond vampire standing there, you gasped, screamed and fainted scaring the crap out of the poor guy! At the moment he was currently loitering outside the gym you were teaching at, he could hear some of your students parents talking about you.

"It's waste I tell you, someone with her Quirk should've gone pro!" A woman said in a snarky tone the man next to her nodded. " I agree. if I had a Quirk like L/n-san I would be saving lives and kicking ass, instead of teaching kids how to dog paddle!" Keigo growled looking up from his phone and spoke up. 

"Yeah...She could've gone pro, but instead she's here teaching your kids not to drown..." 

Both adults froze and saw the number 2 hero glowering at them his wings slightly puffed and raised making him look bigger, They sheepishly apologized and scurried off, Just as you walked out, with an unreadable expression it was obvious you had heard everything just now, but were relucted to say anything as the two of you started the routine of walking home together, you were still on the ropes about Hawks. 

When he first showed up (after you woke up) you freaked out thinking he was there to to silence you and keep his secret, however after calming you down, he started going on about soulmates, blood-bonds and you being his other half, you were very reluctant to believe him after all... the first time you saw him, he was covered in blood feeding off a woman who looked half dead! Hawks seemed genuinely remorseful about you seeing that, it wasn't his intention to scare you, he explained how the woman was fine. 

She wasn't dead like Y/n had thought! he just used his venom to put her into a state of ecstasy... she likely has no idea the winged blond had been drinking her blood, She was at home most likely believing she had a wild night with the number 2 hero. He even showed you the girl's social media account to prove it; There she was doing a bathroom selfie bragging about the wicked "hickey" Hawks had given her...

Now here you are a month later and the vampire hasn't left your side since! Well... Except for when he has to go on patrol, then he has one of his feathers following you, and you have this sinking suspicion that Hawks has been sleeping on your roof at night...though you're never sure, you could hear something rolling around up there but whatever it is, is usually gone by the time you go check it out, later that night Hawks texted you inviting you to dinner, you read the restaurant's name... Dang that's pretty swanky place, you didn't even know if you had a dress or whatever to wear! luckily in the far reaches of your closet you found an old black dress that seemed suitable enough for the job... and sighed. " I only wore this once, to a funeral..." you muttered before getting ready.

You wished you had taken a shot of whiskey before you left the house, you were a ball of shaking anxiety as you entered the restaurant, the hostess eyed you with a unpleasant sneer. "Can I help you?" she said in fake sweet tone. "Y-Y/n L/n, I-I'm here to meet a Mr. T.K.?" you stammered the hostess scrunched her nose as she gave you a once over snorted. 

"I don't know how you found out about his reservation... but I can assure you the number 2 hero doesn't associate with your type." she with sneer your face would would've been flushed with anger if you weren't holding back every fiber in your body to slap that smug smile off that bitch's face. "Well can you go check?" you snapped standing up to your full height which threw the hostess off, she curt nod and walked off into the back...

(Hawks knew you were here he could smell you the second you walked in, his eyes briefly skimmed over the menu as he herd hostess approach, without you... "Sorry about that Hawks." the redhead cooed as the blonde looked at her bemused she snorted. "Some fake (h/c) slut tried to say you were waiting on her-" she continued talking as Keigo talked over her. " I am waiting for Y/n." he stated firmly as the hostess finished what she was saying. "Just let me ask my boss to let me off and we ca..." she trailed off and blinked not believing what she just heard.

"w-What?" she chortled thinking this was a joke as Hawks deadpanned repeating what he said. "I am waiting for Y/n, go get her." it wasn't request the hostess looked like a fish as she stared at the No. 2 slack-jawed. "Bu...You.. I- what about me?!" she sputtered lip quivering like a child who'd been denied candy, the winged man just eyed her incredulously making it clear he doesn't know her. "What are you talking about?" Hostess didn't answer she just stomped away to go get you.)    

A few minutes later she came back all red in the face. "Please follow me ma'am." she huffed now it was your turn to be smug. "Oh?... But I thought the No. 2 hero didn’t associate with my type?" you hissed as she snapped her head up to look at you eyes her brown eyes filled with jealous rage and you realized....It was her. The girl from the park. "My apologies ma'am." she said with a forced cheery tone as she led you to a private booth where Hawks was waiting his wings stood up at full attention as you sat down.

"Hey did you have any trouble?" he asked nodded towards the front desk where the hostess was giving both of of you the stink-eye. "You don't recognize her?" you whispered as Keigo's brow furrowed as he tried to piece it together.... had.. they slept together?...Hmm no, signed her tits? that was a possibility, He hummed scratching his beard You could tell he was drawing blanks. "She's the woman from the night...when we met?" His gold eyes widened.

 "Oh... the blood that tasted like charcoal and moldy bread." he grimaced in disgusted as he finally pieced it together you tilted your head as him bemused. "That’s what smoker's blood taste like...to me anyways, other Vamps have told me it varies." he stated you hummed nodding your head both intrigue and worried that you were getting use to this odd situation.

While you two were going over the menu, Keigo couldn't help but notice how off you were acting, you were fidgeting and looking around almost like you were...scared. why would you scared? all the other girls he'd brough.... Then it hit Keigo like ton of bricks. 

He was treating you like one of his fans! and not his...hopefully soon to be lover, Dammit! He didn't even think about your comfort zones or asked if you wanted to go out and where did you want to go, he just assumed you would jump at the chance, because what girl doesn't want to go on a date with the number two hero?

After a few moments Keigo put the menu down. "Hey...wanna get out of here?" You were about to protest but the blond put his hand up. "Let me rephrase that; Do you want go somewhere else?" you shyly nodded Keigo called the waiter paid for the drink he had earlier and the two of you went on a very simple and impromptu park date involving pizza and an outdoor movie theater that Keigo had no idea existed; all in all he actually had fun! 

And so did you given the joy and admiration he was sensing coming off you in waves. as opposed the fear and defensiveness you usually gave off around him, which made Hawks hopeful for the future... but for now he'll just settle on being friends, He smiled staring at the spare key you gave him, the blond let out a tiny churr feeling giddy as he fell asleep on your couch, as you caught him outside earlier.  

…..Yes, he was totally sleeping on your roof.