#with “your feelings are valid��� “youre being hard to yourself so im being even softer” with “hey do you wanna play sth”

[sleepyagent]

I want someone to love me quietly and loudly at the same time because Im an idiot

[platoniclokiimagines]

Hey I love your blog so much it has become my safe place! Could you write something where reader is recovering from a restrictive eating disorder and loki is there for her? Im there myself and support from my favorite character would be warmly welcomed 💙

A/N: Normally this would be at the end of this little section, here, but I wanted to put this first because I would like to very much apologize for this being so beyond late. I hope that you’re still here, still reading this blog, and still finding solace in Loki. Disordered eating is something that I’ve been struggling with for the past several years, too, and I know how difficult it can be to come back from that. I appreciate you entrusting me and my Loki to help comfort you, and I hope you know that you are never never never alone. Stay strong, dear one. We’re rooting for you.

WC: 1367

TW: eating disorder, eating disorder recovery // Please please PLEASE do not read this if you do not think that this is something that you can handle.

You’d been staring at the open refrigerator for what feltlike hours, and you were certain you would have stayed there for several more,if you hadn’t heard the soft voice behind you.

“Y/N?”

You didn’t turn around; you didn’t need to, to recognize theperson speaking.

Loki had been the best, when it came to helping you throughthe steps to recovery after you’d admitted how much trouble you’d been havingeating, and they had been doing everything that they could to make the entireprocess on you as easy as possible. They sat with you when you were strugglingto eat, they made you your favorite foods to eat in hopes you’d take even justa couple of bites. They were with you through it all.

In short, they had been a blessing, and you were gratefulthat they were being so kind and understanding in a time where you just neededthe support of someone who cared about you.

“…come on. I’ll fix you some tomato soup. Nice and easy, andwarm.”

They patted you on the back gently, and you mustered up aweak smile as you closed the refrigerator and watched them start digging aroundfor a pot and a can of soup.

“You could just make it in the microwave, you know. ‘sfaster,”you pointed out as you hefted yourself onto a barstool on the opposite side ofthe kitchen island.

“Perhaps, but then I wouldn’t have nearly as much time totalk to you while I make it.” Lokismiled at you then, and you smiled a little more as well, watching as theyturned the stove on and got the soup all ready to heat up just how you likedit, some salt, some pepper, and just a bitof mint, which you’d convinced them ‘enhances the flavor.’

Once they got it simmering, they turned around to face you,leaning back against the counter, close to the stove so they could stir everyso often.

“How are you feeling?” Loki asked it not entirely hesitant, but with obvious concern thatyou might take ill to the question itself, but you only shrugged a bit.

“Bad food day.”

Loki nodded. “That’s okay. It happens sometimes, yeah? Andthat’s okay. Maybe the soup will help a little. Just a few bites, that’s all.And if you want more, then that’s great, but if not, that’s alright, too. Wecan save it for later.”

You nodded and smiled weakly, but it was a struggle. Lokimade it all sound so easy and reasonable, and while you appreciated that theywere handling it that way, it still made you wish that you could get yourself to be that reasonable.

“Hey… Where’s your mind at?” This time, Loki spoke muchsofter, and when you looked back up at them, you found they were watching youintently, brow furrowed as they looked at you, and you heaved a sigh, knowingit would do neither of you any good to lie.

“I just… wish I could get my own brain to think that reasonably.”

Loki nodded slowly, and set down the spoon they were holdingas they moved to lean across the kitchen island so they could place a hand overyours, and for a long moment, they stood there in silence, as they tried to workout what they wanted to say.

“…I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now. And Idon’t want to tell you that anything that you’re feeling is bad or wrong oranything like that at all, because I’m not you, and I don’t get to decide that.But what I can tell you is that…everything that you are feeling isvalid. No matter what anyone else says, or what you say, or even what your ownmind says. It’s tough to be tormented by your own thoughts. That I can relate to. But that doesn’t meanthat you aren’t capable or deserving of good things. Even if it doesn’t feellike that right now, maybe it won’t forever. But I’ll be right here with you,every step of the way, to remind you. You’ll find yourself again, in time. Andit will be a glorious day when youdo. But for now, doing your best is more than enough, and I’m so proud of youfor doing all the hard work that you’re doing.”

You swallowed thickly, finding yourself unable to look atLoki and instead focusing on the pattern of the marbling beneath your hands. “Whatif I relapse again?”

“…then you relapse. And we start back from step one again.That doesn’t mean that you’ve failed. Not in the least. It means you’re still fighting. And that will always beadmirable.”

You nodded a bit, but you still couldn’t look up at Loki,not with the way you could feel the tears welling up in your eyes.

“…is there even a point in trying?”

Loki squeezed your hand gently, and then let go, only tocome around to where you were sitting, kneeling in front of you and taking yourhands so that you were left with no option butto turn on your seat so that you could face them.

“Of course there’sa point. There’s always a point.” Loki held your hands tightly, making surethat you were still looking at them before they continued again. “There are somany things you have left to experience. So many sunsets, and rainstorms, and…trips to the beach with the rest of the team, where you get so sunburned youcan hardly move the next day, and… evenings curled up on the couch with thatbook you’ve read so many times you could probably recite it word for word.Laughing at Thor when he gets caught up in regaling battle tales, and makingfun of Rogers for not understanding where a popular reference came from. Warmcups of tea on late nights… Norns,rainbows and little puppies and babies laughing so whole-heartedly that itmakes you laugh.”

Just the thought ofthat was enough for you to give a watery little laugh, and that was really whatLoki was hoping for, and they smiled along with you, grateful for even just that much from you.

“…we need you herewith us, Y/N. Me, Thor, the rest of the team. We all need you. And we care about you, and we want you to be happy andhealthy, and we’ll do everything that we can to remind you of that, I’ll do everything I can to remind youof that. We’ll take it one day at a time. Just… don’t give up on us yet, okay?Don’t give up on us.”

You sniffled, rather gracelessly, and gave a hiccupping littlesob of a laugh as you nodded a bit. “…one day at a time.”

Loki nodded, and squeezed your hands gently one more time beforestanding up so that they could properly hug you, smiling a bit when youreturned the hug just as fiercely.

“…we’re going to get through this, Y/N. We will. I promiseyou.”

You nodded against their shoulder, and after a long while,drew back, rubbing at your eyes with your sleeve. “…I really needed to hear… all of that.”

“I know. That’s why I said it.” Loki grinned a bit, just cheeky enough to make you smile, aswell, and you couldn’t help but to laugh. “I bet that soup is warm enough foryou, now. We’ll get that in a bowl for you, and get you a nice glass of water. Andwhen you’ve had however much you want, we’ll have a nice little spa day, yeah?I’ll even let you put that horridblack goo on my face that hurts when you take it off.”

“…a face mask?”

Loki only waved their hand dismissively, focusing on ladlingthe soup into a bowl for you, and you smiled a little more, the last bit ofapprehension melting away, at least for now, as you watched them work with suchcare. You weren’t so sure youdeserved them, but gods, were you glad to have them.

“…you’ve got yourself a deal.”

[flopity-flips]

Hi I was wondering if I could request something with Prompto? (If your taking requests!) I've been feeling lonely and awful and friend-less, I know it's probably just my brain fucking with me but it's still no fun, so could I request Prompto comforting reader when they confess to feeling like no one truly likes them or wants them around, maybe even going as far as to say that they think he only hangs around them because he feels bad for them? And maybe Prom then confesses his feelings for them?

this is so ebic im gonna do more requests wooooo. feel free to send more. i might start doing shorter ones.

The bed was the most comfort and warmth she had received in a while. While she weren’t exactly the most popular, she wasn’t exactly sans friends; however, it was difficult for someone like her, depressed, anxious, to feel like she had any friends, no matter how few or how little she knew she had in reality.

She sniffled and rolled over to the other side of her bed, facing the wall and hugging her pillow, letting it absorb the tears. She didn’t know why, but a wave of loneliness had overcome her. That familiar feeling of being unlovable, to everyone including herself possesed her. The rational part of her knew she was wrong, she didn’t like hersefl too much, nor did she like being by herself, but she did have at least a few people who loved her. 

Why was it always so hard for her? Why didn’t the people around her like her? Why was it that she were almost invisible to them?

She wept as a billion self-deprecating questions and answers flooded her mind, grabbing her phone from the other side of the bed to try and distract herself to stop the tears. When the screen illuminated, she saw a message from her best friend, Prompto. She began to cry even more at that.

Every second spent with Prompto made her feel like she was on cloud nine; yes she was in love, but it was never to be requited. Prompto was so perfect, so wonderful, so handsome. Even his flaws, both physical and personality wise, were so beautiful and added to his handsome appeal in her eyes. 

But him being with her was such a preposterous idea. She was nothing like him, nor was she someone worthy of having his wonderful, gentle, loving heart poured out into her hands, for her to cherish and love; no, not at all, when, in her eyes, her heart was a disgusting, selfish, needy heart that was too much for anyone to handle. I mean, why else would no one want her around? 

It was obviously due to her constant desire to be loved by her friends and to have her friends love her. And that overbearing desire that was currently clenching her heart, keeping her from replying to the message at the moment, would keep her from having his heart as her own in the long term.

Pushing her beliefs about her compared to him aside, she tapped on the notification banner and typed out a message, opting not to read his reply from an earlier conversation of theirs, rather, she typed out a message, one of seeking validation, love, and care which she so desperately needed in the moment.

“I don’t understand what’s wrong with my head, man.” She tapped send.

The three dots popped up before his reply appeared on her screen.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m not. I’m so alone. It’s tearing my heart apart.”

“You know I hate it when you talk like that. I mean, we’re friends, right? Or am i just chopped liver? ;)”

She sighed at that last question.

“I’m sorry. I know we’re friends, you mean the world to me, I love being around you. It’s just. It’s hard to feel loved when… No one’s really showing that they love you.”

The three dots indicating his typing did not pop up quickly in usually Prompto fashion, just a little checkmark next to the textbox indicating he had received and read the message. However, his reply came in time.

“Hey can I come over? I don’t want you being alone.”

A little shocked at his words and sudden desire to meet, she typed out her reply.

“I guess. I look and feel like shit right now but if you want to, knock yourself out.”

“Great cause I’m already out front.”

She blinked a few times, re-reading the message; sure the two were relatively nearby, but this was fast even for Prompto.

She heard the opening of her entrance door and the familiar, gentle voice belonging to the object of her affections.

“Hey, it’s me, I’m not a burglar. I’m taking my shoes off and coming in, okay?” He called, announcing his presence.

She chuckled a little at his opening, but turned away from facing her door, pillow still being clutched tightly against her chest as a form of comfort and defense. She heard the creak of the door to her room opening and tensed at it and the soft footsteps approaching her bed.

The weight felt right in front of her back was no doubt that of Prompto’s. He placed a hand on her shoulder and rubbed circles with his thumb in order to comfort her.

“Hey…” He gently spoke, the tenderness in his voice not apparent to her.

“Why’d you come?” She softly inquired, not so much mad, just confused as to why he’d want to be around her.

“I… I get it. I know it’s hard. I mean, you know I grew up alone. I didn’t get much love. And I mean, I’m friends with the guys, but I feel isolated around them a lot just because I’m not like them. I just don’t want you to be alone when you feel most alone,” he explained.

She tried to even her breath, but it was just getting worse as he spilled his heart to her, his hand moving back and forth across her shoulder now. He shifted so that he was laying behind her on the bed, hugging her tightly, burying his face in her back to muffle her loud sobs.

“What I’m trying to say is… Even if you don’t feel like someone out there loves you or you just feel alone, even when you’re surrounded by friends,” he paused a moment, gathering his thoughts. “I’ll always be there. To love you and help you feel less alone. Because you mean so much to me, much more than you’ll ever know.”

She got up, gently brushing him off her, turning around to face him, eyes red and puffy, cheeks shining with tears streaking down her face. 

“You mean it?” She asked.

Prompto didn’t respond at first, lost at looking at her.

“Prompto?” She inquired, voice softer.

His face turns red in realization and he put his hands in his face and begins laughing nervously.

“I didn’t mean to say that but, yeah. I meant it. I ultra meant it. Crownsguard’s honor. I’m like… stupid in love with you,” he said, avoiding eye contact.

You looked at him, mouth slightly agape, before giggling.

“Hey why are you laughing! I thought you were sad! Come on man… I spilled my heart ‘cause you spilled yours,” he whined, playing with the longer end of his fringe, still avoiding eye contact.

You calmed down, wiping your tears and smiling.

“No, no. It’s just… Accidentally confessing is such a you way of confessing. I love it,” you looked to him, continuing. “I love you too.”

He looked at you, eyes widening before scooping you up in a big hug.

“Really! That’s like… I can’t think of the words! It’s like… super cash money!” He exclaimed.

You snorted in his arms and sighed, nuzzling in his chest.

“I like you a ton…” You muttered. “Y’know? I don’t feel so lonely anymore…”

Prompto pulled away and gasped dramatically.

“My love cured you!”

You snorted once more at his antics.

“Yes. Yes it did.”

[nonbinaryresource]

hey im not sure if you'll be able to help with this but if you can id like some advice - I've been getting gender-related nightmares lately. they vary a lot, but its always me being one gender and wishing i was another. they're pretty bad and im really not sure what to do.

I’m so sorry to hear that! This sounds really not fun.

There are a couple things you can start working on to temper these dreams.

First, a short-term solution might be - if you’re able - to try different sleeping pills. Meds can react different for people, but some sleeping pills may just help lull you to sleep, while others may konk you out until morning. Melatonin is a good one if you have trouble getting to sleep and may be a gentler alternative to others. I also like a glass of barley tea before bed. Tastes good and does help me drift off to sleep. My mom uses drowsy Benadryl because it gets her to sleep fast and keeps her asleep most the night. Since Benadryl is an antihistimine, it actually blocks a neurotransmitter in your brain that leads to REM sleep, which means you’ll likely get less dreams - but you might also feel less well rested overall, as you’ll get more light sleep and less deep sleep as a result of not having any REM. But it might be worth it for you to take every once in a while. Tylenol PM is the one that basically just knocks me out until morning. I personally don’t like the feeling (I’ve compared it to a sudden coma striking me down - but I also don’t have a lot of nightmares), but I’ve suggested it to friends who were having PTSD nightmares before, and it konked them out good, too, and let them finally get some good night’s rest.

Long-term, what does your sleep hygiene look like? A big part of cutting out nightmares is implementing good sleep hygiene techniques. This means:

Going to bed on a schedule

Not exercising or eating right before bed (at least one hour between exercising and sleeping and 2 - 3 hours between eating and sleeping)

Exercising during the day/getting your body moving

Cutting out screentime 30 - 60 minutes before bedtime

Doing a relaxing activity before sleeping (a puzzle, reading - if you use an ereader only use it on nighttime mode, light stretching, self-massage, meditation, taking a hot bath or shower, journaling about your day)

Cutting out light in your bedroom while you sleep - a sleeping mask can be a quick and easy way to do this

Adding a gentle white sound machine or sound machine that produces relaxing nature/animal sounds and keeping it on throughout the night. A cheaper option could also just be to play some soothing (classical/instrumental would work) music overnight at a softer volume. The sound can not only help you get to sleep but can help you stay asleep, so they may help you stave off your nightmares as well

Lower the temperature in your room if you sleep with any blankets so you can stay a good temperature at night and not heat up too much

Try chamomile tea and/or lavender lotion to help you relax into sleep

I don’t know the science behind this one or how much stock to really put in it, but I have heard that wireless signals produce tones that we can’t outwardly hear but that can disturb our sleep, so it might be worth storing your wireless devices outside your room, if possible, while you sleep, and moving your router/modem if it’s stored in your room

As a final tie in to that list, it can help to stop and acknowledge the dream. Especially if you’re having trouble getting back to sleep, take a few minutes to actually physically write out your dream (keep a dream journal and a book light by your bed!). Then re-write the ending so it’s happier. This is hard when your bad dream is more psychological than physical in nature, but it could just be something as simple as re-ending the dream with, “And I realized that whatever I identify with at that moment is my gender, and I’m valid no matter what I look like or what anyone else says. I took power in validating myself and felt much more comfortable and confident.” Acknowledging the bad feelings brought up by a dream can help take away its power. It’s kind of like when you have a problem and you share it with your friend, and even though your friend couldn’t do anything to fix your problem, it feels better to have shared the weight and made it somehow lesser for yourself. And re-writing the ending to be happier can help you get a hold of the bad feelings and re-direct them to more peaceful ones, which can help you confront the nightmares in general as well as help you get back to sleep.

As well, a lot of nightmares are brought on by real life stressors - and it certainly sounds like yours could fall under this reason - so doing what you can to address these stresses during the day can also help temper the nightmares.

What are your long-term coping mechanisms for any negative gender-related feelings you experience? In the second part of this recent ask, I went over a whole lot of ways to mentally cope with any negative gender feelings or just stress brought on by questioning. I would suggest checking that out! Even if you’re not really struggling during the day, spending some time getting in touch with your feelings and fears and worries might help reveal something to you that you’ve been denying or reveal something is a larger issue for you than you’ve been saying.

Finally, one last thing you could look into trying is practicing lucid dreaming. Using lucid dreaming to confront nightmares may be something that’s more helpful with a therapist’s guidance, but it might be worth looking into on your own if that’s out of reach for you. I know a couple people who have practiced lucid dreaming on their own to at least moderate success. Lucid dreaming is already used in therapy to help treat recurring nightmares and PTSD.

Lucid dreaming is a form of dreaming where you are aware that you are dreaming and can therefore take control of the dream and what is happening to you. It can also help you regulate your emotions within a dream so the dream is less scary and powerful. It’s also a tool to let you re-visualize the path and end of the dream so you can cut out the bad stuff and end it in a way that you want it to end. At the very least, it gives you a more ‘physical’ way to confront the feelings in your dream. I put this one as a last suggestion because it can take a lot of practice to be able to lucid dream, much less do so effectively, and I would estimate it could be even longer-term than the other long-term solutions I have listed above.

I don’t dream much (or don’t remember my dreams, anyway), so I’ve never really given much thought myself into lucid dreaming, so I can’t suggest any particularly good places to start, but I do know when I was looking into a couple years ago, there was information on how to practice lucid dreaming pretty easily available on the internet.

I hope something here helps and you start getting some good nights of rest!

[gif of the drawn Chippy the dog, a small white dog with fluffy ears, laying on a blue pillow. In front of them is a picture frame facing them, labeled “Your picture”. Another arrow is pointing towards Chippy that says “Dreaming of you”, while above Chippy is a pink dream cloud that reads “Sweet Dreams”.]

~Pluto