#wisteria;clover;001

[babyitsmagic]

she sees clover reach for the knife and thinks oh. she was going to stab me again. and now they're going to have to argue about that later. again. also she's keeping the knife now. cost of non-consensual stabbing. (gods, what the fuck is wrong with her?) "clover," she sighs the name. how does she explain this to the fae? it's so much and so complicated, and she's not very good at being genuine, but fuck, she's trying. she reaches up to brush the tears away with her thumb, and she's not sure her touch will be welcome, but she still feels the need to try. "those five minutes to them will still have felt like years to me. i... i have so many nieces and nephews and niblings. what if forget their names? what if, while i'm gone, i forget whether julian plays guitar or drums, or what luca is allergic to, or which ones are serial killers and which ones faint at the sight of blood? years is a long time and i wouldn't be the same person i was when i left. i know that you meant it when you said i could visit them, but i also know how fucking weird time gets for immortals, and i can't imagine being in the fae realm makes it any better." it probably makes it a million times worse, but she decides not to say that out loud. "it is a choice, even if you didn't mean for it to be one. it's still not a no. it's not a yes, because we need to sort out all the very tedious and boring details before i can agree to go there. but if i didn't love you, it would've been a no. it would've been a fuck right off for even asking. but i'm willing to figure it out, because i love you. so help me figure it out."

clover moves away from wisteria, as if she’s been stung by the words. what does she mean? this isn’t the answer she was supposed to give. she was supposed to agree. she was supposed to be happy. why isn’t she happy? she’s being offered immortal life, always cared for, always looked after, and she isn’t sure? because of her siblings? that wouldn’t miss her? doesn’t she know clover would miss her desperately? why won’t she just say yes? she waits and waits and she never hears it, but she does hear the way her breath is shaky and shallow. she is not going to cry. she’s not going to do it. she turns away from her, trying to rein herself in. her hand reaches for the knife she keeps on her thigh before she remembers it’s not there and she lets out a noise somewhere between a sob and a growl that’s decidedly not human. “but it’s not a yes, right?” she asks, running her hands aggressively through her hair before turning to face her again. “why isn’t it a yes, wisteria? i thought you loved me. i thought you were mine.” her hands are waving frantically with every word she says as she moves closer to her. “you said you loved me. you said you were mine, but you won’t come with me? were you lying? do you not trust me? i can’t lie to you,” she lunges forward with the words, but doesn’t touch her, doesn’t do anything but get in her space. “if i say you can visit your family, you can fucking visit them.” she paces away from her and back again, her skin feeling like it’s on fire. “it’s, like, my entire court’s thing. we’re named after it. because we can drop you back right where you need to go. i could spend years with you at home and send you here back five minutes after we left. and you’re saying you need to think about it? you’re not mine. you don’t love me. you wouldn’t think about it if you were. you would say yes. someone that was mine wouldn’t do this to me. i wasn’t asking you to pick them or me. i was asking you to say you wanted me as much as i want you.” and fucking great, she’s crying now.

[babyitsmagic]

she blinks and the first thing that comes out of her mouth is, "i don't want to live there." which immediately makes her grimace. "wait, shit, hang on. not what i meant. just... give me a sec here, okay? also when my brain feels less... this. i'm going to have at least half a million follow-up questions." so much information in so little time and she's absolutely reeling from it and trying to piece it all together. "i don't know if i want to live there," she rephrases. "i know you said i could still visit my family but i also know how weird time gets and like... most of my family is immortal, but not all of it. not even all of my siblings. my sister ivy is adopted and i don't even know if she wants to find a way to become immortal or if she's taking more of a yolo approach to it all and none of that is the point. and, okay this is gonna sound way sadder than i mean it to, but just bear with me, i guess. i honestly don't know how much of my family would even miss me, because we're just stupidly huge and i'm not that close to most of them, 'cause serial killer is kind of a genetic trait in the family and when you're trying not to go down that path, you tend to avoid all the murder-happy family members which is like... half my siblings. like murder-happy or murder-neutral. i'm off-track again. my point is that i would still miss them. and gods, even if she wanted to come, i couldn't just bring ivy to the fae realm. she's practically human." she's spiraling. oh boy. she takes a breath. "sorry, sorry. i'm way ahead of myself. i... there would be a lot to think about. it's not a no, i just would... we would need to figure out a way for me to come back here without time getting totally fucked."

clover watches her carefully, doing her best to keep her expression neutral. is this too much? has she pushed wisteria away? she doesn’t know what she’ll do if she has, but she knows it won’t be anything even remotely good. the wall she’s put up melts away the second wisteria finally responds and her face lights up. gods, that is the most romantic thing she’s ever heard. she wants to just lean in and kiss her and never stop kissing her because wow, to be loved the way you love is great, but she knows she needs to come clean. “it’s more complicated than that, but i love that you would do that for me. and it’s very hard to come clean when all i want to do now is kiss you.” but she takes a deep breath and launches right into it, “so i know you know i’m fae and i’m actually from the fae realm and still live there, but i never told you that my parents are royal. my dad and his wife are king and queen of the court of time and my mom is a princess in the court of clover. i don’t expect you to know what those are, just know it’s fancy shit. my mom doesn’t live in her original court anymore, so we shouldn’t have anything to worry about there. and i don’t think my dad is going to give me the throne, probably for the same reason his grandfather didn’t give it to one of his kids or my dad’s cousins. that’s an entirely separate thing, though, and the point is there’s a very strong likelihood some political maneuvering will be needed eventually and the maneuvering will be me marrying a royal from a different court. and it could be anything from we need something official in the books for how friendly we’re being to this is the only thing stopping a war from breaking out. so varying levels of me taking it seriously are required. and i know it seems like it would be so easy to run away from it, but that’s never going to be an option. i wouldn’t do that to my parents. and i also do like the court and the things i do for the court and my family and friends there. so i can’t live here forever in the human world. i was sort of putting all my eggs in the you’d be so in love with me by the time you found out that you’d move to the fae realm with me so we could be together forever there basket, i think is the phrase you guys use here? and if you did, you could still visit your family and stuff, but you’d mostly be with me. and obviously i’d be married to someone else, but that’s honestly such a small thing. my dad’s married to someone else, doesn’t mean my parents aren’t ridiculously in love with each other. we could do that.”

[babyitsmagic]

she pulls back and there's a wariness in her expression. clover has been keeping secrets, it would seem, and it feels like whatever information she has to share is significant. she takes a moment to figure out how to word what she wants to say. there's a careful balance between helpful and overbearing. "...i hope you know that if anyone is standing between you and happiness, i wouldn't hesitate to tear their heart out with my bare hand, if that was something you wanted."

clover laughs and then, a moment too late, realizes wisteria means it. and why wouldn’t she? it’s not like she knows clover is royal. she cups her face in both of her hands, hoping to ease any offense she may have caused. “i’m not laughing at the idea of marrying you, i want to make that very clear. i’m laughing at the idea that i’ll get to marry someone just because i want to.” she hopes that a life like her parents have will be enough for wisteria because it’s the best she can offer her. she hums in delight when she feels her hands in her hair. the question? less delightful. because it’s complicated and she can’t lie and she knows she needs to answer correctly. clover kisses her again, but she knows it’ll only distract her for so long. “as much as i can be. there’s something you should probably know.”

[babyitsmagic]

"careful, clover. that's starting to sound an awful lot like a marriage proposal." she knows that rings can signify other things, but it's not nearly as common. she isn't entirely certain if the fae have the same sort of tradition. there are fae members of her extended family, but not many, and most of them were raised here. she's going to have to do some research at some point. she returns the soft kiss, sliding her hand and running her fingers through clover's hair. "but are you mine?" if she isn't, if there's anyone standing between wisteria and that possibility, she thinks she might actually commit a murder over it.

“i thought maybe a necklace,” she starts, her fingers delicately tracing a line across wisteria’s beautiful throat, “but then again, a ring is pretty customary, isn’t it?” either way, probably something with rubies, for love and blood and passion and every other glorious thing she feels when she looks at wisteria. she’ll have to find out if she likes them before she settles on a piece for her…though, it could be more than one piece. she leans into the touch, but her expression is still guarded. it’s the sort of answer-but-not-really she’d expect to hear back home, not here, and she’s trying to get herself in check when she hears it. the smile on her face is soft, the mischief and danger gone from her expression. she leans in and kisses her softly. “i’m glad.”

[babyitsmagic]

"and what would you give me?" she asks, barely managing to get the question out as she melts into clover's touch. it's unreasonable for clover to have this much sway over her, but she's always been weak for beautiful women, especially the violent ones. with her free hand, wisteria reaches up to cup clover's face. "who else's would i be?" no one's, maybe. if she were a little more reasonable, which she clearly is not, she would probably say she's no one's. but instead, she says, "i'm yours," to make it very clear that she isn't playing any sort of game.

clover tilts her head to look wisteria in the eyes, still holding her hand close. “mmm….maybe a bit, but other love marks fade away too, so i suppose it’s not much different and i’d get over it. i’ll have to give you something, though, so everyone else knows you’re mine.” she presses another kiss to her palm and then trails a few kisses down her arm to her elbow, pulling her in closer as she does. something dawns on her and she looks at her once more, guarded expression on her face. “you are mine, aren’t you, wisteria?”

[babyitsmagic]

that sends chills down her spine, but not in a bad way. there are... a lot of nerves in a hand. that's gonna hurt like a bitch, but not in a way she can't handle or won't recover from. "would you be disappointed if it didn't actually scar?" it might not. she's not as immortal as her mother, but she's not as fragile as her father, and she doesn't have any scars yet. but she thinks clover just might be sad about it.

“oh, oh,” clover responds, wicked grin spreading across her lips. she moves from where she’s perched, closer to wisteria, pulling the other in. “i already have some ideas, but first let me ask, how would you feel if you wound up with some scars on these pretty little hands of yours?” she asks, pulling one of wisteria’s hands up to her face so she can press a kiss to the center of her palm, right where she wants to stick the knife to pin her to the bed.

[babyitsmagic]

"no, no, no. i don't want you to stab me because you're mad. that's not gonna go well for either of us in the long run. fucking yikes." she absolutely doesn't want to imagine the kind of shit show that would turn into. "but i'm just not ruling out stabbing entirely. if you wanna try it in the bedroom with consent as a kink thing, that's different. and kinda hot."

“so you want me to say ‘hey i’m frustrated and want to stab you, can i?’” she asks, incredulous look on her face. “that means i’m never gonna get to stab you. which, like, fine, i’ll try not to, i do actually feel bad that i did it, but don’t pretend you’re gonna let me.” at the very least, wisteria doesn’t care about her stabbing other people. but really, she wouldn’t stop even if she didn’t approve. most of the time, she has a good reason. at least to her.

[babyitsmagic]

"i'm about to start arguing. i'm not saying stabbing is off the table. i'm just saying you need consent first. ...at least from me. i don't really care about anyone else." good luck to anyone else who earns a stabbing from clover. that's on them.

“we’re not arguing anymore, so is it really?” clover asks, tilting her head with a smile. she purses her lips and tilts her head to the other side. “unless you’re going to argue with me now and then, i guess, maybe you have a point.” what does it say that she stuck so many qualifiers in there?

[babyitsmagic]

what a fuckin' thing to say. and how irritating that it doesn't make clover any less attractive. she'd wonder what the fuck is wrong with her if it didn't run in the family. "i love you, too. but stabbing is a shit way to solve an argument."

@babyitsmagic

“Sorry that I stabbed you. I love you, actually.”