#william ransome x female reader

[sserpente]

A/N: Request from @ppartridgee​. Naughty, spooky, fluffy. Well, I know I’m perfectly content now! :D

Words: 2616 Warnings: smut, fluff

Additional NSFW warnings: Daddy kink (well, that’s certainly a first on this blog!)

-

Thud. You scrambled to your feet when the door fell shut, shutting the book in your hands and frantically shoving it under your pillow. William Ransome had no business finding out what you were reading. You had bought the novel on your trip to London and Lord, was it sinful… about a young woman who fell in love with the priest of her town after he had convinced her that the only way to repent for her sins was to pleasure him… You bit your lower lip. Yes. William Ransome definitely had no business finding out about any of that.

“Don’t you think…” he began instead of a greeting, “…that you are exaggerating a little bit with all of your Halloween decoration?” You grinned when he stepped into your field of vision and crossed your arms before your chest, holding back a cough. You’d been feeling quite horrible and worn out all morning, like an invisible force was pulling at your limbs. You already suspected that you were getting sick but as long as you still had chores to do, you were unwilling to give in to it.

“No. Why?” The entire house was full of pumpkins. Some you had drawn funny faces on, others now made scary grimaces. Nearer the spookiest day of the year, you would carve some of them too and stuff them with a candle so they’d illuminate the darkness after dusk.

The vicar smiled and shook his head.

“I made some pumpkin soup, you want some?”

“Oh? Pumpkin soup? Good god, where did you get the pumpkins for it?” He asked jokingly as he sat down at the table.

Chuckling, you staggered over to your small kitchen area to heat up the pot. Will regularly came here ever since his wife died. There was a sad loneliness about the vicar that deeply touched you and somehow… you had found friendship in one another. Well… Will had found friendship in you. You had found a man you didn’t dare confess your love to.

You had not spoken about Stella in a while but you were unsure whether Will was still grieving, for if he was… you would never want to put him in a position where he’d have to choose between your friendship or… you sighed. Whatever the second option was.

“The kids and teens in town will go crazy again…” He sighed, burying his face in his hands. “I just hope they’ll live the church alone.”

“Oh, I’m sure they will. Last year was an exception and those responsible moved away. It’ll be fine. I’m looking forward to handing out some sweets, in any case.”

“They’ll be running your door in. You are the only one who puts effort into Halloween. I just wish you would…” Will looked up with an apologetic expression on his face. “I just wish you would… tone it down just a little bit. I couldn’t bear the villagers starting to call you a witch and ask me to cast you out or perform an exorcism on you.”

Heat pooled in your core, making you gasp quietly. Instantly, you were reminded of that one scene in the book where the priest had tied the protagonist to the altar as naked as Eve and then proceeded to lick every single inch of her body until he’d reached her wet folds, a teasing flick to her most sensitive part… You cleared your throat, finishing up Will’s meal.

“It’s just a holiday, I’m allowed to be excited about it. Besides, aren’t the Jack’O’Lanterns supposed to scare away evil spirits? They should thank me I’m doing your job!” You chuckled and set the soup on the table before him. Will dug in immediately.

“That’s not exactly how it works, darling.” Darling. He always had you weak in the knees when he called you that. Not that he knew.

You closed your eyes for a moment. The headache that’d been tormenting you since this morning kept getting worse, and no amount of fluids you drank helped. You winced after you’d finished cleaning up and Will had finished his soup.

“Is everything okay?” He asked, concern radiating over to you.

“Yeah… just a headache. I’m probably coming down with the flu or something.” The vicar frowned, rising from his seat to walk over to you. You gasped quietly when he brought his palm to your forehead.

“You are burning up, darling. You should be in bed. Come on… I will get the doctor.”

“I’ll be fine, Will. I’ve had this a dozen times before. A bit of rest and I’ll be…” You got interrupted by a coughing fit so bad your stomach hurt by the time you were done.

“Bed. Right now,” was all he said. Your lower regions clenched. That… fuck. That was by far the most dominant thing he had ever… you swallowed thickly. He never once took his eyes off you until you were back in bed, allowing him to tuck you in and sit on the edge of the mattress.

“I can brew you some tea in your kitchen if that is alright with you.”

“Yes, thank you.”

“And after that,” he said when he rose again, “I expect you to stay in bed until you recovered. No more decorating with pumpkins, okay?” He was so sweet. And loving, and kind, and caring and hot and handsome and…

“Okay, Daddy.” Your eyes widened. Fuck. You had said that out loud. Will stopped dead in his tracks and gave you a hesitant look.

“What… did you just call me?”

Biting your lower lip, you avoided his blue gaze, looking around your bedroom in an attempt to find the perfect excuse for what had just happened… but you couldn’t. Daddy was what the main protagonist in your book had started calling the honourable Father. Pure filth had followed the statement in the book… but Will wasn’t exactly fictional. Quite on the contrary. He was very, very real.

Panicking, you opened your mouth without a single sound escaping it, shuffling back a little on the bed and managing, on top of your embarrassment, to knock the book hidden under your pillow on the wooden floor.

Will frowned, giving you a questioning look before his blue eyes landed on the title. His lips parted as he picked it up. You watched, frozen in place when he flipped it over and skimmed the blurb. And then, his eyes locked with yours again.

“I can explain…” You started. But could you? The only explanation here was that your feelings for the town’s vicar went way beyond friendship and that you desired him like a dragon desired treasure. Will was your treasure. And up until now, you had been perfectly content with having him in your life as a friend, even if your heart… and your body… longed for more.

“It’s just a novel.”

“A novel about a young woman and her… vicar. And you calling me ‘Daddy’ surely was no accident, was it?” He looked at you, not in a reproachful way, but as if he wanted to, no, needed to figure you out. Your thoughts, your feelings. As if he suspected… The way he said “Daddy” made you shiver with need, even more so when he said your name.

“If we go… there… you know things would never be like they were before then.”

“You… Will… Do you…”

“I… I do. I do reciprocate.”

Your lips parted, both excitement and shock filling your core at the same time. “Why… why did you never tell me?”

“Because…” He paused, looking up to the ceiling as if fetching the words from there. “Because I am your vicar. I am supposed to protect you and provide comfort, not lure you into a romantic relationship with me.”

“You needed company and comfort as much as I did, Will. You can’t possibly believe that God will provide you with that when you’re all alone in that church praying.” Another coughing fit. Damn that flu.

“I did not allow myself to go any further. I am supposed to be mourning my wife…”

“It’s been over a year, Will. She wouldn’t want you to waste away and…”

The vicar closed his eyes for a brief moment, finally setting your book aside. “If we do this…” He repeated. “I’m not sure I will be able to go back to being your friend, darling.”

“I… I know.” But you felt like you might die if you didn’t get to feel him. Taste him, smell him, let yourself be consumed by him. “I don’t want you to.”

Will’s gaze was so loving you feared you’d melt into a puddle, even more so when it darkened with a start and he said, “Then be good for me and sit on my lap.” Testing the waters. Seeing how far he could take it. Exploring and daring. This was as new for him as it was for you.

The corners of your mouth twitched when he sat down on the bed and you crawled over to him to obey. “Okay.”

“Okay…?”

You pressed your legs together. Fuck.

“Okay… Daddy.” You blushed, making him chuckle.

“I’m sorry…” you choked out. “I didn’t… the book… and it’s kind of hot given you’re…”

Will smiled. “No need to be ashamed. I like the idea… I simply didn’t think you’d have such a filthy mind, darling.”

You grinned despite your growing headache. “Is that a sin? I might need to be… punished if it is.”

Will took the hint and smiled. “Perhaps another time. For now, we need to nurse you back to health. Are you sure you don’t want to see the doctor?”

“No… it’s that time of the year, I’ll be fine. A sore throat, and a bit of a fever… I’ll just… stay in bed and rest. I don’t want to miss Halloween.”

“Very well then… I’m sure we’ll find a different way to make you feel better. You know…” he began, moving your skirts out of the way so the only piece of fabric still protecting you from his soft hands were your cotton knickers. Your heartbeat sped up, along with a familiar heat pooling right between your legs. “…last time I was in London, Dr. Garrett and I had a very interesting conversation about how the release of endorphins… is believed to reduce stress and pain. And do you know what causes a high release of endorphins at once?”

“N-no?” Your breath was shaky, and so was your entire body. You brought your hands to his shoulders to steady yourself all the while Will spread your legs even further. This was happening. This was truly happening.

“Orgasms, darling.” Your knickers were wet. Soaked.

“So let me take care of you…” Sucking in a deep breath through your teeth, you let him push the fabric aside and then leaned forward to press your lips against his. Oh… Quickly, you turned your head.

“Let me kiss you, darling.” He smiled, hiding his irritation.

“I don’t want to infect you.”

“Ah… but what we are about to do will not infect me?” As if to make a point, Will began to unbuckle his belt. Then, suddenly, he paused, looking you deep in the eye. “Are you certain you want this?”

“Y-yes. Are… are you?”

“More than anything, love. I just never thought you would feel the same way. I would never pressure you into…”

“You’re not!” A cough. “I promise you’re not. I want this,” you stressed. You inched forward, feeling his hard length hidden beneath his trousers.

Whimpering when he freed himself, Will then grabbed a hold of your bottom and gently lifted you up, onto his throbbing member. Fuck, you were quite positive you had never seen a cock this beautiful. And every fibre of your being was aching to feel it inside of you.

Eager to ride him, you bucked your hips to sit down, the vicar, however, stopped you.

“Slowly… we don’t want you to exhaust yourself, right?” You shook your head, biting your lower lip so hard you feared you’d draw blood.

“No, Daddy…” Calling him so only fuelled your arousal, even more so when he growled. He actually growled. Fuck. Inch by agonising inch, you impaled yourself on his hard manhood until his tip was pressing against your cervix almost painfully.

Will was guiding you as you began to ride him, heeding his advice to go slow. His large hands were on your hips, rocking you back and forth in an almost soothing manner—and at this point, you were already so lost in your pleasure and quite possibly your fever that you would have done anything he asked for. You had a feeling that the vicar was very well aware of that and it was touching how thoughtful he was being with your vulnerability.

Never before had you felt like this. So at ease. So innocent, so… you took a deep breath, increasing your speed a little. Subspace. You’d read about it before. Deeper and deeper you fell into that blissful state all the while your arousal grew higher and higher.

Your clit was rubbing deliciously against Will’s pelvic bone, the sound of sex echoing through the room.

“Easy… don’t rush it…” You heard him mumble when you sped up yet again, eager for the orgasm that was slowly creeping up on you like a poltergeist.

“But… what about… you…” You breathed out in response, barely able to form a functioning sentence anymore.

“I am already struggling to hold out for a while longer, sweet angel.” Sweet angel… Your pussy clenched around him, a delicious precursor of what you were hunting like a hungry lioness.

“You’re close…” He said. It was not a question. Nodding mutely, you dug your fingernails into his clothed shoulders, looking him deep in the eye with parted lips. Your mouth formed a perfect O when you finally came undone, gushing all over him as you let your climax consume you.

Will moaned. “I have to… pull out, darling… We can’t risk…” He groaned once more. It took you all of your willpower to stop riding him, to avoid feeling him cumming inside of you and filling you up with his seed. But in the end, you managed, if anything because you were not exactly fond of the idea of getting pregnant just yet either.

Will lifted you off of him, flipping you over so you came to lie on your back, and wrapped his hand around his thick length, finishing what you had started. A couple more eager thrusts were all it took for him to stain both the bed and your stomach with his warm seed, accompanied by heavy grunts and groans.

Then, for a few peaceful and quiet seconds, it was utterly silent. You were too exhausted to lift yourself up, instead left it to Will to stand, adjust his trousers, and then reach for the cloth next to your washing bowl on top of the vanity to clean you up.

“Thank you…” You whispered, allowing him to tuck you in straight after, smiling weakly when he planted a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Are you feeling alright? Perhaps… we should have waited until you feel better…”

“No… no, I’m fine. Tired but fine. That was… God, that was amazing.”

Your eyes fell shut but you felt his smile nonetheless.

“It was. I only ever dared dream of being with you like this.” He paused, stroking your hair. “I’ll get you your tea now. I’ll take care of you. I promise.”

You smiled. When he turned around to leave the bedroom, before you could utter another cheeky “Thank you, Daddy”, you had already fallen asleep.

-

A/N: *logs out of Tumblr to bathe in Holy Water*

[inkandpen22]

The Heiress and the Gangster (1/?)

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Female!Reader

Warnings: violence, swearing

Word Count: 2.7k

Part Summary: Y/N Adair, an American heiress, is visiting London for the social season with her fiancé Alfred Bamford. Alfie Simmons and Tommy Shelby have formed a plan to kidnap Y/N and hold her for ransom, that is until Tommy changes his mind...

Masterlist

Y/N

The car rolls up to the entrance of the race track. My driver, Mr. Richards, comes to a steady halt and immediately hops out of the car.

"Ready, darling?" Al questions with a grin beside me.

I pull back the velvet curtain covering my window to peer up at the arena. "As I'll ever be."

Mr. Richards opens the door and offers me his glove-covered hand. "Miss Adair."

I step out gracefully, my wide-brim hat blocking the beaming sun from my face. Al crosses behind the car to join me. His head finds its way to my back securely. Robert, my main bodyguard, climbs out of his own car with two more security my father hired. Al escorts me inside the stadium to the boxes. Robert leads the way with his two henchmen behind us. It's like being put into a human box.

When we arrive at our box, we're greeted by our friends in attendance. It's rare that we make it over to England, so when we do it's nice to see everyone. Al and I perform our social duties, making small talk and asking about everyone's families as though we all didn't have dinner together last night. It's the same couples in different settings for the entire month we're here.

_________________________________

Tommy

I watch from one of the pub tables at the top of the box with John as posh folks shuffle in to find their spots. When news broke that Y/N Adair would be visiting London for a month, both American and England were over the moon. The youngest child and only daughter of William Vincent Adair, the richest banker in America. She will inherit a third of his multi-million dollar fortune. It's a known fact amongst the public that's she's the favorite child so the percentage may be greater than just a third. My boys and Alfie's team are banking on that rumor. If she were to be kidnapped and held for ransom by a couple of English gangsters, it's certain her father will pay a hefty sum for her safe return to The States.

John nudges me subtly to avoid attention. "There she is!"

My eyes flicker away from the hustle and bustle of the crowd toward the entrance of the box. A young woman in an all-white lace dress crosses our path. A gentle smile rests across her lips as the Viscount and Viscountess Furness approach her, each greeting her with an embrace. Her Y/H/C hair peeks through beneath her lavish matching hat. For a moment, I experience hesitation. She's not what I expected at all.

John nudges my arm with a snicker. “You alright, Tom? Look as though you’ve seen a ghost.” 

I shake my head, taking a smoke from my cigarette. "No, that can't be her. She's far too young."

"Of course it is!" John argues.

A young gentleman in a brand new navy suit follows close beside her, keeping a protective hand pressed to her back. He shakes hands with his peers, charming his audience as he and Miss Adair are greeted with cheers.

"And her arrogant playboy fiancé, Alfred Bamford." My brother scoffs. "His family owns more railways in the U.S. than any company in the entire world!"

As my brother babbles, I watch closely as Y/N stands beside Alfred with a restrained, but convincing, smile. As he gloats and encourages banter with their fellow posh folk, she's quiet and glancing about the arena.

"Their marriage will create a media frenzy!" John describes in my ear. "Adair Banks and Bamford Rails, it's a match made in posh people heaven. Shame she'll never live to see it," he snickers.

I press my cigarette into the ashtray and turn my body toward my brother. "As soon as the gun fires that's when Alfie's man takes the shot.” I check my watch. “He'll be here in five minutes. That's when you leave and fetch the car. Understood?"

He nods sharply, "right, Tom. Got it."

___________________________________

Y/N

Anticipating the race, Al and I stand right against the rail with our dainty gold binoculars, searching for my family's horse.

"I need Olympus to win," I worry outwardly. "I need to prove to my father that this trip was worth it."

"I’m certain William will be pleased no matter the outcome."

"You don't know my father then," I chuckle.

"Excuse me!" A voice announces over the chatter of the box.

I glance over my shoulder as a well-dressed middle-aged man hurries up to my security. His brow is sweaty and his white suit wrinkled. He rushes out words to Robert before being escorted over to me.

"Welcome to Ascot, Madam," he welcomes, gesturing to the large building. "I'm John Wilkson and I'm a partner at the track. May I get you anything before the festivities?" He rubs his hands in circles nervously.

I offer John my hand with a warm smile. "Pleasure to make your acquaintance. If possible, I would like a pot of Earl Grey."

"Oh yes! Yes, definitely!" The man gushes as Robert leads him toward the door. "Right away, Madam!"

"Thank you!" I nod, maintaining my smile until he's out of view.

Al chuckles beside me at the man’s expense as he rubs his palm up and down my spine. "How are you enjoying it so far, My Dear?"

"I don't see what all the fuss is about," I remark. " It doesn't appear any more luxurious than Arlington Park."

"You are far too difficult to please, darling," he teases, scooping up my glove-covered hand and planting a kiss to the back of it.

"Welcome ladies and gentlemen to today's festivities..." the announcer begins, causing widespread cheering across the crowd.

Al and I clap our hands along with our friends.

"Your tea, Miss Adair, a young waiter informs me as he sets down the set on a side table by our chairs.

I thank him quietly before he dismisses himself.

"Don't forget, tonight is the dinner with Prince Albert and Lady Elizabeth," Al reminds me.

"Aw yes, thank you!" I express with relief as I step back to pick up my teacup and return to my spot beside him. "They're quite lovely, aren't they? Their engagement is such delightful news." I bring my cup to my lips for a sip.

"I'm certainly looking forward to the wedding, it'll be a spectacle." He smirks. “Another excuse to return in the spring.”

I narrow my eyes mischievously, sharing the same agenda as him. "They can be the social event of the season in England, but we shall claim America."

Tommy

Two of Miss Adair’s men are positioned outside while his Head stands against the far wall, just a few feet from her. Alfie's hitman enters the tent without suspicion, dressed like a posh race-goer and his gun well concealed. He glances in my direction, giving me the signal to release my brother. I give John a brief nod and he disappears through the opening in the curtain.

"Jockeys! Prepare your horses!" The announcer declares, marking the start of the races.

I clap along with the crowd. Everyone in the box is zoned in on the gates where the jockeys are mounting their horses. Alfie's man claps as well, keeping his eyes on the horses to blend in as he continues toward Miss Adair and Mr. Bamford. He stops in the second row, just behind the couple.

My eyes flicker to Y/N. A glowing smile forms across her face as she switches her sight away from the gates toward her fiancé. Her eyes glimmering with optimism and excitement. There’s a youthfulness in her I haven’t seen in anyone since the war. She has no idea that the man behind her has been sent to point a gun at her head and kidnap her. Her attention travels about the box, at her friends and peers. Her eyes glance in my direction, her soft Y/E/C eyes meet mine. Her radiating smile softens as her hands slows to a steady halt. Then, something in me just... snaps.

My attention changes to the man on the field lifts his gun into the air. At the same moment, Alfie's man reaches into his coat pocket.

"No! Wait!" I shout, knocking the table out of the way. "Everyone down!"

I leap over the chairs and tackle Alfie's man. He sets off the gun as we stumble to the floor, chairs flying all about. Screams ensue as we wrestle on the floor. A man I recognize as the Head of Y/N's security steps on Alfie's man's hand. With a hiss, he releases his fist around the gun and the security knocks it away. I rush to my feet to inspect the damages, to see if Y/N was hurt, but I see no sign of her. Where did the bullet hit? A hanging bit of cloth that was once the awning answers my question. The arena is in chaos as people travel upstream toward the exists. People are being trampled and pushing each other about.

I work against the traffic down toward the railing to where I last saw Y/N. I shove people out of my way in a hurry. Then, that's when I spot her hat, squashed flat on the floor. I lean down to pick it up and that's when I finally find her resting against the wood base of the rail, holding her head with a bloody hand.

Y/N

I remove my hand from my stinging forehead to see my once white-glove soaked in blood. One minute I was scanning the reaction of the crowd behind me, then there was a shout. The shot for the race to begin rang and I was knocked forward. My head hit the metal railing and I fell to the floor. My forehead was stinging and I realized I was bleeding. Then, I swear I heard another gunshot. I've tried to stand up, but everyone’s scrambling to get out. Plus, my head is throbbing

Suddenly, a man appears hovering above me. He stares down at me with a clenched jaw and a look of determination. He leans down, scoops up my unscathed hand. Before I utter a word, he begins to usher me through the chaos. My feet shuffle across the floor briskly to keep up as he grips my hand tightly. People continue to shout and scream for their loved ones, frightened.

"Who are you?" I ask loudly over the noise.

He ignores me, guiding the way through the arena. People rush down the closest stairs, eager to reach one of the main exits. This man, however, avoids all the staircases and remains on the walkway of the top floor. I sense he's leading me to the furthermost end and hopefully to an emergency exit.

"Answer me this instant!" I demand, attempting to yank my hand free. "Do you know who I am?"

"Yes, Miss Adair, I do!" He finally answers and whips his head around to meet my gaze. "Now, if you wish to not get shot, I suggest you follow me!"

I check over my shoulder for Al. "But my fiancé-"

"They're not after him," he states turning his attention back ahead.

My stomach drops. "You mean you know who's behind this?"

"I know enough..." His answer is vague and it worries me.

"Why do they wish to hurt me?"

"Your family is the wealthiest in the United States! You should really travel with more security," he suggests over his shoulder.

My prediction was correct, the man takes me to the furthest end of the platform to a fire escape of sorts behind a curtain. It's much less hectic than the main stairwells other than some workers attempting to escape. The man never releases my hand as he leads the swift way down the metal stairs. Once we're on solid ground, we weave through various parts of the arena. Booths and vendors scatter the area. The man seems to know this well, making a bee-line for a large white tent tucked away near the main staircase where Al and I first entered the race track.

When we rush into the tent, I first note a series of telephone booths, the dirt floor, and the absence of any of else. The man releases my hand and starts marching around. I assume checking to make sure we're alone. I spin around, checking my surroundings, frightened that one of these men this stranger speaks of will attack me suddenly.

My head is pounding and I can feel the warm blood twinkle down my cheek. My hair must look a fright. Who am I kidding, my white dress is covered in blood and dirt, every part of me is messy.

Tommy

Y/N and I both struggle to catch our breath. I double-check that neither Alfie nor any of his men are hiding out in here. "We should be safe in here," I announce.

"Don't you think we should fetch a car or something!" She rushes out worriedly. “My car is parked just-”

I shake my head, moving back toward her. "No, not yet. They'll be expecting that."

Now that her hand is away from her head, I can inspect her injury properly. A minor gash above her brow. It doesn't appear awful, won't need stitches, but she has significant amounts of blood down the side of her face and cheek.

Y/N

"Here." The man reaches into his pocket square and pulls out his handkerchief. He brings one hand behind my head and the other presses the fabric to my forehead. "We'll have someone look at this once everything is settled."

I nod, still a tad dazed to say the least. "Thank you," I mumble as my eyes fall to his tie directly ahead of me.

For a moment, despite the chaos outside the tent, there's a sense of peacefulness as the stranger pats my cut.

"So, you know my name, what's yours?" I ask. Considering he saved my life, I don't think we should be strangers anymore. “Since we were in the same box, I suspect you’re friends with the Bowes-Lyons.”

"Thomas, Thomas Shelby," he answers directly without much emotion.

"Well, despite the circumstance, it's pleasure to make your acquaintance, Sir. I'm surprised we've never met before considering we share friends."

A faint snicker escapes him as a smirk creeps onto the edge of his lips.

I grin. "What's so funny?"

"An heiress calling me "sir," he chuckles, glancing down from my forehead to meet my gaze. "It's not exactly something I thought I'd ever hear."

My brows scrunch together in confusion. “But aren’t you-”

"Tommy!" A voice calls from behind me.

Frightened, I rush to stand behind Mr. Shelby. My hands wrap around his bicep as I peek around his shoulder. His arm reaches around to keep me close to his back.

"In here Arthur!" He hollers.

Wait, he knows the person?

Suddenly, a lengthy man with a mustache marches into the tent. When his eyes land on us, his brows scrunch together. "What's this? What happened to-"

"Change of plans," Mr. Shelby states, physically relaxing at the sight of him.

The man switches his sight between me and Mr. Shelby. He rocks on his heels nervously. He steps to the side to get a better view of me. "Oh uh... hello then... Miss Adair. Nice to meet ya," he greets.

"And he's a friend?" I ask Mr. Shelby quietly.

He chuckles. "Yes, he's my brother. He's safe."

I step out from behind him hesitantly. I redirect my attention to Arthur and remove my glove to offer him my hand slowly. "Pleasure to meet you as well."

His brows rise at the sight of my hand, but he shakes it nonetheless. He chuckles. "She's awfully friendly," he tells his brother.

"Did you happen to see my fiancé? Alfred Bamford," I ask, growing worried that Al may have been hurt.

"He was escorted to your car I believe by one of your security."

"And the others?" I press urgently. “Are my friends alright? What about Lord and Lady Elphinstone?”

His features fall. "I lost them in the crowd, Miss..."

My eyes grow wide. "I should go find them!"

I go to head back outside, but Mr. Shelby grabs my wrist and steps to block my path.

"The men trying to harm you may still be out there," he warns.

"But my friends! Alfred!” I argue. “They’re probably worried sick! I’ll find my car and have them take me back to the hotel!”

"They'll be searching for you there! I'm sure they already have it staked out."

I huff. "Then where do you suggest I go?"

His eyes flicker to his brother and it's evident a thought has crossed his mind.

"I have an idea..." he states vaguely.

Oh no...

_______________________

Masterlist

[something-tofightfor]

500 Word Kiss Challenge: Logan Delos

Pairing: Logan Delos x tattooed female reader insert (Ink/Ransom)

Word Count: 500

Rating: M (mentions of past trauma, established relationship, william is a massive dickhead)

Scenario: A kiss on the beach

“You realize that we’re out in the open, right?” You were laying on a towel on your stomach, watching as Logan dug in the sand with both hands, letting it run through his fingers into small piles in front of his bent legs. “Anyone could see us.”

“They won’t.” He turned his head toward you and blinked, shrugging his shoulders. “Promise.” With a sigh, you pushed yourself into a sitting position, still eyeing him. “What?” “How can you be so sure? I mean, things still haven’t died down, and Delos is still trying to deal with the fallout from -” “From what?” He was smiling, the sunglasses on his face covering his eyes from you. “From William going to fucking jail? From Juliet divorcing him?” You shuddered, and he watched as you curled the fingers of one hand protectively over your stomach, the scar there faded but still visible. Goddammit. “Hey, I’m sorry, I-”

“Yeah, Logan.” You swallowed hard. “From all that. And instead of staying there to deal with it, you put us on a plane and -” He swiped the sand piles away and reached for you, waiting until you took his hand to pull you closer to him urging you onto his lap so that you were facing him, legs on either side of his body. “I wanted it to be just the two of us.” His thumb firmly pressed to the front of your shoulder - the spot he’d tattooed - Logan used his other hand to trace your side and lower back, fingers following the patterns there though he couldn’t see them. “Wanted to get away from all that bullshit, like I promised you.” “But how do you know, Logan? That no one will -” “I own the island.” You froze, and he watched as your eyes went wide. “That’s how I know.” 

“Loga-” He reached up with one hand, removing the sunglasses and tossing them down to stare into your eyes. “That day in the pool? When I told you we’d take a vacation?” You nodded, confusion on your features. “I started lookin’ that night. Found this place a couple days later, and bought it.” 

“Why?” You whispered the word, and he saw the tears gathering in the corners of your eyes. “Why this -” “I wanted to. For you. For us.” He gestured toward the house with his chin, wrinkling his nose. “For me.” He leaned in, forehead pressed to yours. “Needed it.” I did. I do. He heard the waves crashing behind you, seabirds flying overheard - but all Logan felt was you in his arms, the weight of you on his legs. “You did promise, Delos.” You were stroking the back of his neck with one hand, the other one on his shoulder. “So.” Inhaling deeply, you straightened up, eyeing him. “Got me all to yourself. What’re we gonna do now?” He grinned when you did, leaning in to kiss you - gently at first, and then with more urgency, teeth tugging on your lower lip. “Enjoy it, darlin’.” 

--- 

[jamesbuchananbarnesslut]

Monster Hunter Ch. 1

Pairing: Will Ransome x Female Reader

Words: 1,516

Summary: The year was 1893 in Aldwinter Essex and William Ransome, vicar, has been battling with his towns people and the myth of monsters. Especially, after strange things keep happening in town, most recently an earthquake and even children and locals reporting the sighting of a blackwater beast. Although Will, himself doesn't believe in monsters he's been struggling to convince the town people otherwise. The problem further escalates when men of the town all begin having similar dreams and describe the same woman appearing in them. After each person has these dreams, they seem to be weaker either physically or mentally and, in most cases, have been found dead. The dreams also only started occurring after a new spinster named Y/N moved in on the outskirts of town. With all the increasing rumors, Will is forced to step in and begin to decipher what's happening especially whether he believes these things are real.  

Warnings: yes there is smut in the first piece, but it’s just with Will’s wife. Fingering and P in the V

Tiny Tag List: @venusofthehardsells @spooky1980

Notes: This story first of all wouldn’t be happening without @venusofthehardsells she was the on who first introduced me to these Tom Hiddleston photos. Which in thus created a thirst and need for a fic. But the fic is now a series! I also have not actually read The Essex Serpent and have no idea how the show is going to go, so this is my OWN interpretation and telling of his character. Please enjoy, like, reblog, and leave lots of comments!

Master List

Series Master List

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Will's P.O.V

I had spent another long grueling day arguing with the members of my communion about whether the myths and monsters circulating our small town were real. The rumors began last summer and only thus worsened. I'm at my wits end with it all, and just need a way to qualm what the town is currently feeling. As I worked my way back into my office, I couldn't help but think that the new spinster, Y/N, on the outskirts of town had to have something to do with this all. Considering she had moved in around last summer when the blackwater beast stories first presented themselves. But now that she, herself, was appearing in men's dreams, and then a lot of those men found dead. It was suspicious and she surely has something to do with it all, maybe if not monsters and myths than some type of black magic or witchery.  

By the time I made it back to my office I couldn't help but pull out my hidden bottle of gin and pour myself a drink before I sat down. I manage to swallow the drink all in one swig and end up pouring myself another. Sitting down at my desk with the bottle, I press my fingers to my temples and hunch over the desk. Pondering what's been happening to my small town and why everything's suddenly topsy-turvy. I also can't help but think about how this is going to further affect the towns faith in God, especially thier view him. While my thoughts are still swirling, I throw back my second drink and decide to pour another.  

As if I have a chance to relax though, there's an overflowing pile of paperwork on my desk I still need to sort out. As well as a stack of mail that's been neglected for far too long. That's when I decide it's time to down my third drink and start sorting through the paperwork and at least categorizing it. By the time I finish organizing I have a stack of marriage certificates, christenings, new memberships, and even a decent amount of death certificates. The mail will have to wait until the morning I haven't been home all week; I keep falling asleep in my office or waking up somewhere in the pews. But I know my wife is beginning to worry and I should probably make my way home before I get stuck here.  

I pour myself one final drink for the road, throw it back and begin to push myself to my feet. I tuck the gin back in its hiding place within the bookshelf and begin to shut down the building while heading out. Specifically, blowing out all the candles, turning off oil lamps and locking the doors. Even in a buzzed stupor those are things I never forget.  

I stumble down the steps of the church and make it to the cobblestone street heading towards home. Even though there aren't many streetlamps providing light, there's a clear sky and a full moon making everything gleam and glisten in the dark. As I continue my march home, I pass one of the local pubs and see none other than Y/N, herself outside it. Conversing with John Smith, one of the older blacksmiths. It seems to be a deep intimate moment, that I interrupt by holding my gaze towards them too long. Catching their attention and weird glares back. I tip my head to them and continue walking, hoping I haven't soured their mood.  

By the time I make it home, I can see all the oil lamps are off and two candles going, one in my bedroom meaning the Mrs.'s is up reading or waiting for me. And one in the kitchen, she must have put leftovers out for me. How many times has that this happened this week? I don't want to disturb anybody, so I enter the house through the rear door that leads directly into the kitchen. There's a plate of cold food on the table for me, that I scarf down ravenously. With how little I've been home; I really haven't been eating either. Once I'm done, I rinse off the dishes, setting them aside to be washed in the morning and blow out the candle.  

I slowly make my way upstairs and begin to plot ways to get myself out of this argument with my wife. Maybe because the kids were still sleeping, she'd put off the spat and wait till she sent them off too school or her parents. Either way I wasn't prepared to walk in and find her sitting naked in the candlelight. It's almost like she knew I'd finally make my way home tonight. That or she's been truly waiting each night like this for my return home. Either way I didn't deserve a woman as good as her.  

Her sultry voice broke my shocked stupor, "I was beginning to wonder when I'd ever see you again."

I run my hands through my hair, a nervous habit, and work up a response, "you know, I can't rest easy until I convince everyone that this blackwater serpent isn't real. And now I have reports of Y/N appearing in men's dreams and a lot of those men begin found dead within a couple days or weeks shortly thereafter."

I must have been running my mouth because by the time I look to my wife again she is already up from the bed and stripping me of my clothing.  

"I understand that this is a huge deal honey, but you can't keep burning the candle at both ends and pushing yourself like this," she states while finishing pulling the reaming clothes from my body. "Come, join me in bed maybe if I provide my wifely duties, I can help break you out of this stump." Which is followed by her hands caressing my chest and moving up towards my neck, face and into my hair. Where she pulls my gaze to hers to get a clear look in my eyes. I know she can see how tired and stressed out I am.  

I let her pull me into bed, she makes it so I land on top of her, and I can't help but agree that now would be a good time to have sex. It also means she isn't mad or at least she's trying to amend things this way instead. I begin to kiss her and settle myself in between her legs where my member begins to harden against her. Our kissing becomes passionate, and I feel her entrance slicken. I slide my fingers along her slit and begin to spread her wetness around causing mewls to spill from her mouth into mine. Once she's decently wet, I slip a finger and then two into her, working them at a steady pace. While I move my lips to her chest and tell her she must quiet herself or else she'll wake the children in a hushed mummer.  

After I feel her cum around my finger, I work that same hand over my member, making sure to get it nice and wet. Then I line myself up with her entrance and push in slowly, while putting my hand over her mouth.  

"You just can't help yourself tonight my dear," I mumble into her ear while giving her a chance to adjust to my member in her. She bites my hand, a clear sign I need to get a move on, and I begin to push myself in and out of her tight channel. The pace isn't slow for long though and I begin pounding into her. Her whines spilling out but muffled behind my hand.  

"I know your close again, cum with me yeah?" She nods and with that I drop my hips lower changing the angle. Which immediately triggers her orgasm, causing her tight channel to milk me and pushing me into my orgasm. I pump my seed into her and then roll of to the side. Pulling her tightly into my arms I drift off into sleep thinking about Y/N, John Smith, and the rumors circulating our small town.  

[sserpente]

Sinful Love

Synopsis: William Ransome is tormented by loneliness—a cruel fate you share, for as a demoness, companionship is rare. So when you hear the desolate vicar pray night after night, you emphasise with his pain. You feel it too—and you want to help him, become his and make him yours. But will he still grow to love you when he learns what you truly are?

Here’s an additional disclaimer, for “The Essex Serpent” as well as the characters of this book borrowed for this fan fiction belong to Sarah Perry.

Words: 5870 Warnings: angst, smut, demoness!Reader, slight blasphemy

He was kneeling, looking up at the massive wooden cross in the centre of the church. Tilting your head, you watched him, whispered prayers reaching your ears. Your gaze softened. William Ransome, a man of God, pastor to a people, trusted Reverend. He was a broken man. Lonely. Especially after his wife had passed away and Cora had moved back to London to explore new myths come to life.

Stepping closer, you took in his broad figure. He was tall, and handsome, even from behind. More mumbling. You smiled weakly. You had heard him. And you were going to answer his prayers.

“Father?” Formalities were important, were they not? At least for now. Where you came from, disrespecting ranks could quite literally cost you your head.

The Reverend froze but pulled himself together quickly. He stood, straightening his black priest gowns and then turned around to face you. Only someone with very keen eyesight would have been able to spot the tears swimming in his eyes. You did.

“Can I help you?” His voice was full of concern and sincerity—just like you had expected. You smiled weakly.

“I came for guidance. They sent me to you.”

He nodded understandingly. “I’ve never seen you here before.”

“Yes, well… I’m not from around here,” you responded calmly. The people of Aldwinter did not take kindly to foreigners, you knew this much. Will did not need to know that not a single soul apart from him had seen you here as of yet. That you had appeared seemingly out of thin air—to the human eye anyway.

“Are you alone? It’s not safe for a woman to travel alone in these times. Come. Sit down.”

“I’m very much used to it.”

He beckoned you over to one of the pews. The dark wood was splintered in one place as if someone had attempted to remove part of the engravings.

“What happened there?”

“A mark left by a story from the past.” A myth of a serpent, an embodiment of the devil, or so they had believed. You knew about it, of course. As if Lord Satan would bother with a small village on the coast of England.

“You seem poetic, I like that.” You smirked a little, eliciting a chuckle from the Reverend.

“Well… what is your name?”

Without any hesitation, you gave it to him. It was a simplified version of your true name which, if he was a man of God truly, would recognise. There was no need to alarm him as of yet. You would tell him when the time came. He would see when the time came. When he was ready… and when you were ready.

“Will. Will Ransome.” You shook his hand then, electricity tickling your palms when your skin touched. Your soul was aching for this man. Perhaps his would ache for yours too at some point. He must have felt it too. This magnetising pull, the attraction.

You shivered when he spoke your name again, eyeing you up and down in a way you knew he would give you a chance. “What can I help you with?”

“I feel… lost. Like I don’t know where I belong. Like I don’t know who I should continue to pledge my allegiance to.”

And you were not lying. You answered to nobody and sometimes… that made you feel left out. Like you hadn’t quite found your place in this universe yet.

“You are questioning your faith?” He pried gently. You looked up at him, curious as to what you’d see in those beautiful blue eyes. There was no judgement, no reproach.

“I am questioning myself—so I came here. I have nothing to lose and yet, my journey here could result in an utter disaster.”

William frowned. “You speak in riddles.”

“So I’ve been told before. What about you, Father? Don’t you feel lost sometimes?”

“More often than you think.”

“And what do you do?”

“I pray. I ask God for guidance. We all carry a lot of baggage from our past.” Once again, he said your name. Your heart jumped. “To confess our sins helps us carry on.”

You smiled. “So you believe I would feel better if I confessed my sins?”

Your sins… there were many things you could think of. Someone like you did not live like a saint. Especially when it came to the art of love-making. You couldn’t wait for him to blush and act all shocked once you had told him about those sins.

“Yes. I believe so.”

“You don’t even know me. I’m a complete stranger to you. Yet you are willing to help me?”

Will’s eyes met yours, freezing you in place. He was everything you had imagined him to be. Everything and so much more. Your heart would not stop fluttering for a single second either. He was here with you. He was finally here with you.

“You seem like a kind soul in need of help. I will not turn you away. Where are you staying?”

“I’m not sure yet. I only just arrived.”

“Alone?” He asked once more.

“All alone.”

The Reverend chuckled a little. “You are quite the mystery.” Then he paused, possibly contemplating whether it would be a good idea to do what he offered you next. “Join me. I made a stew. My wife used to… never mind. Something warm to eat will strengthen your body from travelling. Where are you from?” He stood, motioning for you to follow, yet you were sure he had not forgotten about taking your confession.

“Um… London.” It was a half-truth. London was one of the main gateways to where you came from.

“If you are comfortable with it, you can stay at my place. I would worry less knowing you are safe for the night. The sun is setting already.”

You smiled, butterflies awakening in your belly. “I would love that.”

-

Was it normal for a Reverend to offer an outsider whom he had never met before to spend the night at his house? No. Was it normal to invite them over for dinner? You smirked. No. He felt it too. You had been right to answer his prayers. Perhaps showing yourself to him was not going to result in a disaster after all.

Will’s house was clean and tidy. He told you his kids were staying with an aunt outside of Essex and so the only other soul keeping him company was the adorable little Cocker Spaniel by his side.

“He likes you,” Will said after the dog let you pet him.

“I’m good with animals I think.” And I’m good with men of God, too. You had no intentions to turn him, make him reconsider his beliefs. But it would feel nice, for a change, to be worshipped. The last time you had been with a man… a human man… it had been way too long. Some of them were such considerate lovers, so keen on pleasuring the woman they shared the bed with.

Will was a good cook, too. His stew was based on a recipe created by his dead wife, Stella. It must have been a few years now since her passing. He’d never been the same since. Perhaps that’s why he felt lost too. After his fling with Cora—even though you were certain he’d refuse to ever call it that—he quite possibly never forgave himself for being disloyal to his wife.

“I like your house… I like the peace and quiet.”

“Well… it’s not so quiet when the children are around.”

You chuckled. “I can imagine.”

“I can show you my study if you like. Do you like to read?”

“I don’t have a lot of time to read but… I can appreciate a good book.”

Will lead you upstairs. His workspace was indeed full of books, all of which sat neatly on bookshelves towering up all the way to the ceiling.

Curious, you entered the room, fingertips brushing over the leather spines. There was a lot of natural science and a lot of theology too. You held back a scornful giggle when you spotted a dark red book titled “Demonology & The Evils That Escaped The Flood”. If only it was that simple.

“I, uh…” He swallowed. “I can take your confession if you like. It doesn’t need to be in church. We have more privacy here.” There it was. The sternness that came with him being a priest. It was quite frankly arousing. You wanted to comfort this man more than anything and yet, at the very same time, you wanted him to whisper your name while his hard cock jerked against your wet walls and filled you up with his seed.

“I’ve never done this before,” you retorted with an innocent expression on your face.

He smiled without showing his teeth, asking you to approach his desk with a movement of his hand.

“I’ll show you, it’s easy. Here, sit down.” You sat down on his cushioned chair, watching him approach you with slow steps and then lean against the desk. Your gaze was now directly on one level with his crotch.

“You can look down if that’s easier for you. Normally, in a confessional, we can’t see each other’s faces. Get everything off your chest. Everything that makes you doubt, everything you want to be freed from.”

Right now, I want to be freed from my clothes by you… You bit your lower lip, stifling your grin. “What do I say?”

“You say ‘Bless me, Father, for I have sinned’.” His smooth voice made you want to moan out loud. Who knew a vicar could be this enticing? This… sexy?

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned…” You repeated. There was no way he was able to hear the scorn in your voice—or that the whole concept of begging for forgiveness was but a sham for men in power to enforce submission and spread fear of a creature that did not even exist.

“Tell me, child. What is it that weighs on your heart?” Your gaze remained fixed on his crotch—it took you all of your willpower not to reach out and give him a promising squeeze.

“I doubt, Father,” you played along, “my head is filled with unchaste thoughts and I… I feel this urge to just take what I want, whenever I want, regardless of the consequences.”

Will gasped for air. Clearly, he had not expected that.

“You are… an unusual woman.” You didn’t know a lot about confessions but surely, he was not supposed to say something like that. Perhaps you already had him right where you wanted him for the moment.

“I know.” Finally, you looked up, locking eyes with him. A smirk tugged at the corners of your lips when you spotted the intrigued glistening in those blue irises. Wouldn’t you like to know about those naughty thoughts, Father?

You stood again without breaking eye contact with him for even a second, approaching him until not even a piece of paper would have fit between your bodies. You had to look up at this point. Will took a sharp breath and held up his hands, knuckles brushing over what little skin of your body was revealed.

“No… we can’t do this. Listen… you are…” He laughed weakly. “You are without a doubt one of the most beautiful women I have ever had the privilege to meet but we hardly know each other.” And yet, his fingertips lingered on your bare shoulder, tracing your collarbone.

“So if we give in… is that another sin?” You mused. Will frowned, his eyebrows lifting one after the other as if irritated by your comment. Truth be told, there was no reason for him not to be.

“It’s okay, Will… I want it.”

“You’re an unmarried woman,” he continued, “it’s not right.”

“Does that matter? What about you?” Spreading your legs, you pulled him closer. “You aren’t moving away.”

“I… I don’t know what’s gotten into me… I don’t even know who you are, I…”

“Will… please…” This time, you didn’t wait for him to answer. You reached for his chin, pulling his face towards you to kiss him. “Let me taste you…” You whispered against his lips. Gone was your innocence and tenderness. It might have been part of you but you would never let it distort your true nature.

And when your mouths finally met, all the missing puzzle pieces you had been in search of for so long now seemed to fall in place with ease. It felt right. He felt right. Hungrily, you wrapped your arms around his neck to lock him in place, deepening the kiss when you felt him reciprocating.

Your tongue darted out to lick over his lower lip, sneakily asking for entrance. Will’s eyes fell shut, all resistance blown away like leaves in the wind and you knew then that you had won. This man was going to be yours.

“I think I don’t care if I’m sinning, Will. I will make those dirty thoughts reality…” You whispered when you broke the kiss. Grinning wickedly and watching him pant out of breath, you sank to your knees, undoing his trousers. You could already feel the bulge that had formed underneath the fabric.

Finally, you gave him a squeeze, his erection springing free and making you lick your lips. There was no point in wasting your time and letting you both wait. Greedily, you leaned forward and closed your mouth around his tip, suckling on him until he rewarded you with a few drops of precum. With your hands, you massaged his balls to increase his arousal all the while inching more and more of him into your mouth until he hit the back of your throat.

Not being human had its perks—your gag reflex worked a little different than a mortal woman’s. Soon, you were allowing him to fuck your mouth vigorously, letting him bury his fists in your hair all the while listening to his sexy grunts. Just before he got to lose control and cum, however, you pulled away and stood again. He was just as out of breath as you.

“I want you inside me, Will.” You choked out. You could tell your lips were swollen when you spoke. The fiery lust in his eyes was all you needed for confirmation. He nodded as if in trance, almost curious as to what you would do next.

When you pulled him closer by his coat, he smirked, albeit taken by surprise when you turned you both around so your butt cheeks hit the edge of the desk. Will took the lead almost instantly. Sucking in a sharp breath, he grabbed fistfuls of your skirt to pull it up, revealing a pair of tight leather trousers.

“What are you… wearing?” He choked out.

“I’m an unusual woman, remember?” You hadn’t wanted to scare him away with your choice of garments. Leather was common where you came from. No one cared about skirts or dresses or gender roles.

Will shook his head but let it slide for now. You could tell he did not quite approve of your clothing but then again, he was a vicar. Instead, he pulled them down to reveal your glistening cunt to him. You were dripping, ready for him to fill you, to let him claim you.

Then, you flipped around so you had your back to him, sticking out your behind to urge him on. As much as you wanted to see him come undone inside of you and forget about all that grief in his heart for but a few blissful seconds, you could not let him see your eyes during the height of pleasure. Not yet.

You could practically feel him frown behind you. Still, he did nothing to protest when he helped you out of your clothes, piece by piece by piece. Your corset was made of black leather too. It took him a second to undo it all until eventually, you stood before him naked.

You spread your legs even further, propping yourself up on his desk with your elbows and moaning softly. “Will…”

His response was but an animalistic grunt—so unlike a pious Reverend. Your eyes almost rolled to the back of your head when he grabbed your hips and dug his fingers into your flesh to position you properly for him. Then, he guided his hard member to your entrance, sliding it up and down your slickness. Closing your eyes, his name escaped your lips like a prayer when he finally pushed inside and sheathed himself inside your warmth inch by agonising inch.

William Ransome was made for you. His hands felt like they were all over your body even though he kept them on your hips, his breath everywhere on your skin. His gentle thrusts quickly turned into relentless fucking you would not have expected from the vicar—not during the first time you had sex anyways.

The sun had almost disappeared by now, and you could see your reflection in the glass of the window when you opened your eyes again, watching your breasts bounce and your irises glow bright yellow with those slit-like pupils you were so familiar with. Strong emotions always brought about this reaction of your body—and they didn’t say for no reason that the eyes were the gates to the soul.

The desk was rattling with every single stroke of his. Ecstatic, you grabbed his hand and guided his long fingers to your clit. Just a little bit more, just a little bit further…

He caught on to what to do quickly. Will gave your sensitive bundle of nerves a delicious treatment, his eager thrusts never easing. Circling and massaging your clit, he had you right where he wanted you within a matter of minutes when you began to tighten around him, squeezing his cock and making it all the harder for him not to cum straight away.

You could tell he was holding back, waiting for you to finish first—but with those skilled hands, it did not take you much longer. You tensed up when your orgasm washed over you, pleasure flooding your entire body as your walls twitched around him, triggering his own climax.

Will pulled you close. He buried his face in the back of your neck, growling darkly. With but a few more powerful thrusts, he stilled, coating your walls with his seed. If he was worried about getting you pregnant, he did not let it on. Not that he could, anyway. There had to be some perks to your species, after all.

Once you had both come down from your high, you took a few deep breaths and then checked your appearance in the window again. No yellow. You turned around, whining when his now softening member slid out of you again, making even more of a mess of you.

His cum was dribbling down your thighs, your juices covering his shaft that was practically glistening in the artificial light inside his study. Will remained silent—he must have still been processing what had just happened.

“We should take this to your bedroom where it’s more comfortable?” The Reverend nodded. Out of breath, he scooped you up like a bride, making you chuckle, and then brought you to his bedroom.  

Once there, he tucked you in like you were the most precious thing in the world and then left you for a moment only to return with a damp towel to help you clean up. You beamed at him.

“This, uh… I can assure you this isn’t how confessions normally go.”

“You don’t say?” Grinning wickedly, you waved him towards you, allowing him to wrap you both in his blanket once he had climbed into the bed as well. “I would offer you the spare bed in the room downstairs but…”

You chuckled. “Yeah, that offer is rather redundant now.” He paused, and, for a while, just looked at you. He looked at you with his blue eyes so full of affection, you couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss him before he extinguished the lights.

“Promise me you will tell me more about yourself tomorrow. And… I might be a vicar but for you to trust a strange man to take you to his home and then allow him to…”

“Well… I’m not like other women, am I?”

“Did God send you to me?” He murmured, stroking your cheek. You smiled. God had nothing to do with it but for now, you would let him have his peace. “He must have. It feels right to have you in my arms.”

It felt right to be in his arms. And when he fell asleep, you swore to yourself that he would never have to feel lonely again.

-

The next morning, you woke earlier than Will. Watching him sleep for a while, you traced his features with your fingertips until he stirred and squinted his eyes at the bright sunlight flooding the room. Still naked, you stretched and then leaned in closer to him to inhale his scent. Forest, sea, wood, old books… he smelled amazing. Like life. Like pure life.

“Good morning…” He smiled. “I was worried you might have been a dream.”

“I take it you don’t often invite strange women to your house and let them seduce you,” you said in response, grinning devilishly at him.

Will laughed. “Certainly not, no. My flock will condemn me to hell if they learn of this. Come closer.”

It would be absurd to claim you loved him. You barely knew him after all. But then again, things worked a little different for you. You had been listening to this man for a while now, heard all about his sorrows and his pain… you knew him.

And he had your heart, whether they would call it love or not.

A whimper escaped your lips when he raised an eyebrow in an almost mischievous manner and pushed his hand between your thighs. He quickly found what he was looking for. You were not about to say no to some passionate morning sex. Biting your lower lip, you attempted to turn around so he could do something about that growing erection between his own legs.

“Don’t turn away from me again, my dove.” He murmured your name sleepily. “I want to look you in the eyes when I make love to you.”

Biting your lower lip, you considered it for a moment. Was it too early? His loving gaze was warming your heart. He had held you like treasure—and you had never felt this appreciated before. He must have thought you were an angel without wings that had been sent to him.

Still, it was a wave of panic that flooded you once you grew wet for him. Burying your face in the pillow, you spread your legs further for him, hoping that he would let it go. You could hear the sheets ruffle, his delicious treatment never stopping.

You moaned when he whispered your name and turned your face towards his with his free hand, wanting to see your reactions. What you did not expect was for him to plunge himself into you with but one deep thrust, causing your eyes to fly wide open from the sudden surge of pleasure coursing through your veins.

You knew they were yellow the moment you watched his expression fall, shock distorting his beautiful features. Fuck.

“What…”

“Will… don’t be scared. Let me explain.”

“Jesus Christ and Mother of God…” He squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again. You had to disappoint, it was no dream. Will withdrew entirely. He sat up straight, the blanket sliding off his chest.

The urge to pounce on him and lick every inch of his skin grew with every passing second but the horror on his face held you back.

“What… are you?” He asked slowly, calmly. You pressed your lips together to a thin line. “You are not human.” He stated the obvious. Then, suddenly, he buried his face in his hands.

“No. I am not. You…” You paused. “You are taking this a lot more composed than I thought you would.”

“What are you?” He repeated even though you were certain that a part of him already knew. Perhaps some other part was hoping he was wrong. But angels did not have cat-like yellow eyes.

“I am a… demoness. Will…” You reached for his hands, taken aback when he flinched away and practically jumped out of bed as if he had only just realised that he was still sharing the bed with you.

“This isn’t possible. I’m dreaming. I’m hallucinating. I’ve lost my mind.” You heard him say as he put on his trousers. When he finally looked up to meet your gaze, to those eyes that had now returned to their original colour, the affection you had seen sparkling in his was all but gone, replaced with disgust and hostility.

“No, I’m real. Will, I’m real. I heard you pray.” You explained weakly. “I know I’m probably not who you expected.”

“I asked God for help.”

“Do you think he is the only entity out there? You asked the universe for help, you sent a cry for help. And I heard you.”

“You are a creature from hell.” He choked out.

“I’m not a creature!” You snapped. “Hell doesn’t ex… it’s not… well, it’s a bit complicated for the human mind to understand the first time around. I come from a realm below you, that is correct. But I didn’t emerge from eternal hellfire. Will, let me explain it to you. As a man of God, you must think I am evil. I am not. Demons, we are… we are neutral, we don’t… See… even the devil, this creature you think punishes unfortunate souls isn’t real. Satan is a title if anything. Most demons don’t give a damn about making humans pay for their sins.”

“And you?” He spat. Your heart skipped a beat. His tone was stern. Almost hateful.

“I’m neutral. I see the good in people and I see the bad in people. And I saw the good in you…” You added sadly.

“Did you… did you feed off my energy?” He barked.

“What? No. I’m not a succubus. I enjoy intimacy like any other woman does. Will, I came because…” You paused. He wasn’t listening. Not really. The bible had taught him that you were evil and brought about pain and death and bad luck.

He… he was judging you. William Ransome, the kind man you knew saw the good in every living being. His eyes were filled with hatred for you, and strangely, it was not anger you felt. It was disappointment and grief. Like he had just taken your heart and broken it into a million pieces. You had been so convinced that he was different, that he would understand you. You had not done him any harm, now had you? You had spent a night full of love and passion together, and you had talked.

“Why did you invite me into your home, Will? You said I seem like a kind soul. There was something magical between us right from the moment we met. I know you felt it too.”

“You tricked me. You compelled me. Else… I would never have… I…” With an angry grunt, he reached for the holy water on his nightstand and sprinkled it all over you. He appeared shocked when it didn’t make you recoil in pain.

“Please… we sat in church together. Do you truly believe that some stale water will do me any harm?” The words hovered in the air for a little while. He had the books. William Ransome knew how to banish a demon. He knew what he had to do if he truly wanted you gone. Your heart ached at the mere thought of it.

Tearing up, you took a deep breath. You didn’t mean to upset him any further.

“Get back to whatever hellhole you crept out of or I will banish you. Leave me, and leave this town.”

The first tears came rolling down your cheek then, worsening your sight. You sniffed, noticing the sudden shift of energies in the room. Whatever he had felt for you just a moment ago, it was gone for now.

With your lower lip shaking, you climbed out of bed. His eyes widened when you used black magic to put your clothes back on—like black fog they melted onto your body as if they had never been gone. You looked down, facing the wooden floor.

And then, before your heart could break entirely, you disappeared into thin air.

-

They had always warned you about humans. About how they were not to be trusted, unreasonable, unpredictable—believing in a book full of witchcraft but refusing to acknowledge the Wiccans and pagans who came to ask you, demons, for guidance.

But then there was you—blind to the warnings, too intrigued and madly in love with a man whose whispered prayers you had secretly been listening to. The glimmer of hope had been all but cruel, painful, that short moment of pure bliss, however… you took a deep breath. It had been worth it.

And for just a second, so you knew, Will had not felt lonely anymore either. Perhaps this was the reason why you found yourself in church again the same evening, after wandering about in the shadows, hidden from the villagers and even their pets.

You would respect his wishes and accept his belief. That you were evil, not to be trusted, brought about bad luck and death—even if it hurt. That, however, did not mean, that you could leave this silly human priest behind without saying your farewell.

Perhaps he had cooled down by now. Perhaps when you came to say goodbye, the last expression you’d remember would not be the hateful stares he had met you with only hours ago. It was wishful thinking, was it not? But then again, you had always been a rather masochistic demoness.

You didn’t know for sure he was going to be there but your heart cried tears of relief when you heard his whispers in the darkness of the church. He hadn’t lit a single candle to guide his way. There he stood, by the altar, looking down at his hands, with only the pale moonlight fighting its way through the windows lighting up his surroundings.

“Will…”

The Reverend froze, and you couldn’t blame him. Demons moved as quiet as a cat. Several heartbeats passed in which he remained quiet.

“I am a fool,” he said then, breaking the silence and turning around to face you. “I didn’t believe there was a serpent. And I didn’t believe that demons would still walk on Earth to this day, not anymore. I am a fool for not believing my flock. I’m supposed to protect them from evil and now, I shared my bed with…” Whatever he meant to say, he stopped himself. Whether it was because he saw the pained expression on your face or because of an entirely different reason, you could not tell.

“I was lonely,” he continued. “I admit that. You came to me and took advantage of that.”

It was only then you realised what he was holding in his hands. A small silver box with ancient engravings, found in almost every single church—one of the few tools to banish a demon and trap their soul inside forever to keep them from doing harm.

You closed your eyes for a second and you shook your head, new hot tears forming in your eyes and threatening to roll down your cheeks. And it seemed Will did not fail to notice your reaction.

Swallowing thickly, you spoke. Even though you were on the verge of falling apart. “Have you ever considered that maybe I was lonely too? That I thought, hey… maybe we can be lonely together? I didn’t care who you are, or what you are. A man of God. I believed you to be different. But I was clearly wrong about you. I watched you, you know. The man in front of you could be a murderer and you’d still find a way to understand them, find a way to forgive them. You believe they’ll get punished for their sins by your god, so you believe it’s only just to meet them without judgement. But this bright morning… I have never felt more judged in my life. Tell me, William. Do you blame the black cat that happens to cross your path for your bad luck? The cat is just trying to cross the road. I was born the way I am. I’m not evil. I don’t bring about pain or death or suffering or mischief. You are being narrow-minded and old-fashioned. You believe in a book that is about a guy who can turn water into wine. Will… please… If you are going to do this, then know that I never meant to cause you any pain.

“I know you might not believe me.” You laughed bitterly. “I barely believe myself. But I have grown to love you in a way that goes beyond the human concept of affection. We might have spent only one night together but for me, that was enough to realise that I want you to be mine. I have watched you for so long, I emphasised with you. Yes, Will. I love you. A demoness loves you. Unconditionally.”

Slowly, to not startle him, you approached him, waiting for him to make a move. He was shaking. His hands were trembling so much the silver box was rattling, the irritating sound echoing through the church. You looked back up—and realised that he too was crying. With a loud clatter, the box fell to the ground and you breathed out. He couldn’t do it.

“And even if we part now, know that I will always look out for you.” Your smile was weak, stained by your tears. Holding back a sob, you stood on your toes to kiss him—to taste his lips just one last time before returning to a life of loneliness and pain… and watching him daily, making sure he was okay.

Your second sob escaped your lips before you had a chance to stop it. Will was reciprocating the kiss and when he pulled you into his arms, unwilling to let you go, it almost felt like he meant to mend your heart again from how he had wronged you.

“I’m a vicar,” he murmured when he broke away, “how can this be right?”

“Does it feel right?”

“Yes,” he admitted.

“And that’s what scares you.” Your voice was but a mere whisper against his lips. Will nodded.

“Stay,” he suddenly said. “For now. And we’ll…” He took a deep breath. “We’ll figure something out. I don’t want you to leave. I have been praying for a miracle and maybe…” He didn’t finish his sentence. He didn’t have to.

You smiled. Yes. You’d figure something out.

-

A/N: I hope you enjoyed! Now... what do you think, do we need a Part II? Because I think we do! ;-)

[sserpente]

Picture 2: Source 

A/N: THIS IS PART 2! Find Part 1 on my masterlist! After seeing Tom live again last week and fangirling over the upcoming series with some lovely fellow Tom/Loki fans I met at the event, inspiration struck! Enjoy, everybody! ;-)

Here’s an additional disclaimer, for “The Essex Serpent” as well as the characters of this book borrowed for this fan fiction belong to Sarah Perry.

Words: 2033 Warnings: smut, dub-con, old-fashioned sexist beliefs, religion, blasphemy, hysteria, adopted!Reader

This story contains themes that may be offensive and/or triggering for some readers. Please be aware that this is only a piece of fiction and make sure to heed the warnings before proceeding. For more information on the topic of dark themes, please refer to my FAQ. 

-

William Ransome looked up from his throbbing cock. One of his large hands wrapped around it, he kept stroking himself until the sensation almost became too unbearable. It had gotten worse lately, so much worse and yet, he could not stop thinking about you while giving himself some relief. He could see you right in front of him every time he closed his eyes, writhing in pleasure and indigence both at the same time, staring daggers at him.

His visits were regular now, the whole procedure a routine more than anything. But God… you were so beautiful when you came on his fingers and, as he kept bringing joy to his hardened manhood, he thought about how he had found himself to be looking forward to meeting you for your treatments—to feel your juices coat his digits, to hear your soft moans and your insults which became more and more half-hearted the closer he drove you to orgasm.

You were being less stubborn these days, and more… compliant. He wondered what you would be like today. Would those innocent eyes be full of desperation, anger and, what he imagined must have been longing, meet his? Would your gasps and your whimpering fill his ears, fuel his own arousal?

He groaned then, his climax rippling through him like a hurricane. Spurting his seed all over his hand and the floor, he dug his free hand into the edge of his desk, enjoying how utter bliss filled his body head to toe.

William had long given up his denial. He was attracted to you. If it wasn’t for his position as the Reverend, his position as, quite frankly, your doctor, perhaps he would have asked your brothers for permission to make you his. Perhaps…

With a deep sigh—a rather clumsy attempt to regain his composure—he reached for the tissue in his pocket to clean both his hand and his now slowly softening member. Then, he tucked himself back in, reached for his black coat and left the house.

-

Reading had become even more important to you lately. It took your mind off things, carried your thoughts away from the handsome Reverend who would invade the privacy of your bedroom day in and out to force pleasure from you.

He believed he was helping you. He was convinced that God, or whoever was out there, would reward him for his kindness, his much-needed help. You scoffed at the pages of your book. Only his so-called “treatment” was not working on you, now was it?

How would those numbing flashes of pleasure change your mind about women’s value? How would it change your mind about not wanting to get married, about not wanting to waste your life raising children and cleaning the house while your husband got to build himself a career? It did not.

For what it was worth, you had stopped resisting. It was tiring, exhausting… and none of your struggles had stopped the Reverend from exploring your most intimate parts with his hands before. He had been quick to exchange the uncomfortable leather belt with a silken rope, one he must have asked the local tailor to craft for him, all to keep you in check without damaging your skin and now, the last couple of days, he had had no need to use it anymore altogether. For now.

He was an arsehole. A considerate arsehole but an arsehole nonetheless. And said arsehole was knocking on your door as of right now.

William let himself in without waiting for your response. You knew to expect him daily by now, knew to be decent when he came and to make time in your daily schedule for your… for your treatment.

Your eyes met, yours judgemental and almost hostile, his apologetic and yet firm.

You shivered regardless when he spoke your name. “Are you ready?”

“That’s what you ask me every day, Reverend, and yet you seem convinced that one day, my answer will change. That I will change,” you added a little more quietly, averting his gaze.

You heard him sigh and lock the door when you turned your back on him, lying down on your bed.

“I am just trying to help you. The least you could do is show me some respect in return.”

You scoffed. “Respect is earned. And I can assure you, you will not find it between my legs.”

And yet, when you spoke those words, you could feel yourself clenching down there. Your body had grown used to his skilled touches quickly, knowing what to expect and what to feel as soon as he stepped into your private space… quite literally.

“Let’s get it over with…” You spread your legs for him willingly, resisting the urge to slap his hands away and throw every curse word you had ever learned right at his face while he lifted your skirts to reveal your sex to him.

Once he was content with how you were positioned, he joined you on the bed, propping himself up with an elbow so he could keep an eye on your face and your reactions to him. And then, as soon as his thumb began brushing over your clit and applying just enough pressure to get you all worked up for him, your body grew putty underneath him and you, against your will, relaxed.

You could feel his hot breath on you as you began to pant soon after, two of his long digits pushing past what little resistance your body put up, curling at your g-spot and massaging your pussy with but one promise—bringing you to orgasm for him.

Arching your back, the first moan escaped your lips when he applied more pressure, playing your clit like an instrument. His forehead was about to touch yours, your breathing synching. Your weak attempt to shoot him an angry glare was foiled when his lips suddenly brushed against yours.

Shock rippled through you, almost simultaneously with your climax. Clenching around his fingers repeatedly, you bucked your hips up for more friction, to let that blissful high consume you whole. William’s lips were on yours now, moving against yours timidly and demanding both at the same time. You could feel his tongue dart out to taste your lips, to drink you in like holy water.

Only once you finally took back control over your senses did you realise what was happening. And how part of you did not want either of you to stop. He barely bothered hiding his erection anymore now that he was so close to you.

The tension between you was palpable and for just a brief moment, you did not care that what he was trying to accomplish was to get you to be more obedient and submissive by making you cum all over his fingers day in and out. You did not care that as the Reverend, he was neither medically qualified to do this, nor in the position to kiss you. Perhaps your orgasm had cut off the blood supply to your brain.

You did not object when he cupped himself through his trousers in an attempt to bring some relief to his arousal, tearing them down just far enough for you to catch a glimpse of dark hair. William practically whined, aching for pleasure, aching for… you.

The mere thought of it, as much as you preferred to hate it, made you burn, go up in flames—and you knew that all resistance on your end was gone when you heard him whispering your name once he reluctantly broke the kiss. His erection sprang free when he finally gave his trousers another tug, tearing his underwear right down with them.

This was wrong in so many different ways, was it not? And yet… our body was craving it. And so was his. You spread your legs even further, allowing him to position himself between them and moaning when his tip pressed against your slick entrance.

“Will…” Wherever your gentleness and your desire for this man to treat you like a goddess came from all of a sudden, you did not know either. You were drunk on lust, drunk on the feeling of him inside of you.

Inch by antagonising inch, he pushed inside, claiming you. Your walls clenched around him in joyful anticipation, the sensation of his body joined with yours numbing your ability to think. He retreated then, pulling out almost entirely only to sheathe himself inside again, falling into a steady but tender rhythm.

William cradled you in his arms as he fucked you, his thrusts having you see stars. Unlike what they had told you, it did not hurt. Quite on the contrary—it was the most wonderful encounter you had ever had with a man. You were so incredibly wet the bed sheets underneath you were soaked already, mixing with both your sweat the faster William pounded into you.

More and more eager with every thrust, he was soon rutting into you uncontrollably, driving you further and further towards another mind-bending orgasm. His thumb returned to your clit, teasing it gently all the while hunting his own pleasure.

Close… so close… Your body shattered, fractured into a million tiny pieces. Utter bliss coursed through you, making every inch of your body tingle with lust. William followed you down the abyss only mere moments after.

Thrusting into you one last time, he finally stilled, filling you up with his seed. You studied his face as he came, for once experiencing him without this mask of composure, severity and firmness. Instead, there was softness, nothing but relaxation.

Several seconds passed in which the air was filled with your rapid breathing and the smell of sex. And then, as if ripped from sleep by a nightmare, the Reverend moved away from you.

“Oh my God… this… you…” Unable to form a functioning sentence, you touched your fingers to your lips almost as if you’d still feel him linger there. What had you done? Was this… had this been part of his sick treatment?

“I sinned… I dishonoured you… what have I done…”

“You… what?”

“I ruined you. Who would ever… your brothers will have me arrested for stealing your virginity. It was meant for your future husband, not me. I had no right…” He trailed off, standing abruptly and tucking himself back in.

You sat up, lips parted—your eyes filling with utter rage as you stared him down.

“What?! Have you lost your mind? I am not some prized possession that has now lost its value just because I… most men sleep with many women before they marry. How are they not used up and worthless once they lose their virginity, huh?” You growled, your heart skipping a beat when he spoke your name.

“You don’t understand how serious this is,” he said, ignoring your argument almost entirely. “You could be pregnant. You would bring shame upon your brothers, shame upon the name of your family, shame upon yourself…”

You raised your eyebrows, seemingly unimpressed. “Well guess what, I don’t care. Besides…”

You stopped. Telling him that the elder woman working at the local apothecary provided you with a herb mixture that would prevent pregnancy so you would never have to worry about becoming a mother or a wife or a housewife or all three was probably not the best idea in the current circumstances. This wasn’t about the Reverend’s reputation. It was about owning a woman like she was nothing but cattle.

All of a sudden, you felt the urge to scream at him, to beat some sense into him. Most importantly, however, you felt heartbroken. Had there not been a connection, only seconds ago? And was it at all significant whether it was of pure sexual nature or… more profound?

“This was your mistake. Fix it.” You spat, even though everything inside of you screamed to snuggle up to him and let him hold you in his arms again, a precursor or an aftermath, maybe both, to the incredible sex you had had just now.

“I am fixing it,” William said seriously, looking you straight in the eye. “I am going to marry you.”

-

A/N: Part 3, the final part, is in the works! ;-)

If you enjoyed this story, I would appreciate it so much if you supported me on Kofi! ko-fi.com/sserpente ♥

[sserpente]

Picture 2: Source

A/N: Oops. I read the book and Heavens, it’s good. I can’t wait to see how Tom is going to portray William! ♥

Here’s an additional disclaimer, for “The Essex Serpent” as well as the characters of this book borrowed for this fan fiction belong to Sarah Perry.

Words: 2698 Warnings: smut, non-con (just to be safe), old-fashioned sexist beliefs, religion, blasphemy, hysteria, adopted!Reader

This story contains themes that may be offensive and/or triggering for some readers. Please be aware that this is only a piece of fiction and make sure to heed the warnings before proceeding. For more information on the topic of dark themes, please refer to my FAQ.

-

Dear Reverend Ransome,

we write to you in the hopes of receiving your guidance and the help of God. Our unwed stepsister is unwell, yet our funds do not allow for calling upon a doctor from town.

We suspect the worst. Her behaviour has been insufferable and unacceptable for months, her temper concerning to the point we have begun to fear her young and fragile body might have become home to an evil spirit.

As you are a man of God, we pray to the Lord you will be able to save her soul and ask with all due respect and devotion if you would pay our humble home a visit at your earliest convenience.

Yours respectfully,

The Junathan Brothers

-

William Ransome frowned. Looking up from the letter, crinkled as it was in his large hands, he faced an imposing oak through the clean glass of his window by the desk, its green leaves trembling in the wind. It was a light breeze, nothing more and nothing less, bringing about spring and with it, the blooming of flowers and plants and the awakening of a great many animals, the resurrection of Christ. He had been looking forward to spending the upcoming Easter holidays with the community, to sending his prayers to Heaven and to feasting with friends and family… now with a start, as he watched the wind rustle through the quiet landscape, he found himself worrying about a woman in her early adultery, one which he had only met once as a young girl in a dress too big for her size.

Yes, the Junathans… he remembered them indeed. Three young boys, always out causing mischief and making trouble. It was them who had, nearly a decade back now, smashed one of the windows of the church with a pinecone while playing a silly game. At long last, so it appeared judging by the eloquence with which the letter had been written, they had all grown up. Why of course he would help. In fact, he had meant to pay the pub down the road a visit today anyway—he might as well change his plans and instead do something good.

Putting the letter down, he reached for his coat and went on his way.

-

“Stay in today. We have invited someone who we believe will be able to help… he might even know how to cure you, sister.”

You shook your head, snarling. This was ridiculous. You were not sick. How was it so wrong for a woman to speak her mind freely? To crave independence, a life driven by science and new discoveries rather than blind obedience to her husband, trapped in an old-fashioned faith older than dinosaurs?

Crossing your arms before your chest, you stared daggers at your brothers. If looks could kill, they would long be dead. For some peculiar reason, and perhaps given that you had been adopted as an infant, they seemed to believe they had to patronise you in every possible decision you had to make. It would not be long until they found a husband for you. You huffed. You would face the Essex Serpent rather than letting this happen.

“How many times do I need to tell you that I am not sick?”

Your eldest brother sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with his fingers. “Our guest will be hungry. We should offer him something to eat.” He said. Expectation sparkled in his brown eyes, making you laugh out loud so suddenly he flinched.

“Your guest will be hungry. You should offer him something to eat. I am not about to cook a meal for a man who shares the same twisted and confining beliefs as you, dear brother.” With that, you stood from the uncomfortable kitchen chair and retreated to your room, your footsteps swallowed by the dark red carpet on the staircase.

-

You had reached for a book and started reading to distract yourself when about an hour later, there was a soft knock on your door.

“Yes?” The door opened, just a smidge, and a young man with stunning hair and mesmerising blue eyes stuck his head through the gap.

“Reverend Ransome? What are you doing here?”

“William, please. I… your brothers asked for me help… to see what’s wrong. They say you have been feeling unwell.”

You scoffed. “They called you? Oh, I feel perfectly fine.” Glancing at him, you nodded when he mutely asked to enter the room and closed the door behind him. William Ransome, a man of god—the type of man who did not believe in manmade fairy tales, except for when they were written down in the bible.

He ought to be more rational than your brothers then.

“May I sit?” There were no chairs in your room other than the cushioned one at your dressing table. He made himself comfortable when you nodded once more.

“So tell me, how have you been feeling lately?”

“Normal. I am not possessed, you know. My brothers simply won’t accept I have a mind of my own. That I have a brain that I can think with. I’m adopted, remember? If they truly cared about me, they would respect my decisions.”

“Surely they mean you no harm.”

“They mean me no harm? Is that what you think? Their utmost priority is to have me married off to some rich bloke so it will help with the family’s reputation.”

“People gossip a lot these days.”

“I don’t care what other people think and neither should you, William.”

“It can be quite disheartening. When Stella, my wife, died… I was devastated. I prayed to God asking him why he had taken her from me all the while some unfortunate souls in town made up rumours about me visiting the local… brothel.”

You raised your eyebrows. “Rightfully so?”

“No! Of course not. Jesus.” William shook his head, clearly shocked by your blunt assumption. “You have quite the temper.”

“For not wanting to be put on a leash like a dog? Yes, I presume I do. That’s not a crime now, is it?”

The Reverend hesitated. “No… it isn’t.” He spoke your name then, prompting you to meet his blue eyes. “When was the last time you took a deep breath? You seem very tense to me.”

“You would be too if your brothers thought you are sharing your body with a demon.”

William sighed.

“So will you tell them that they are wrong? Will you tell them to listen to reason? I am fine.”

He pursed his lips and stood, stirring hope in your guts. “I will go speak to your brothers.” Relief poured through your veins as you watched him leave and leaned back on your bed. Perhaps you should have prepared him some food after all.

-

“How did it go? Did she speak to you?” It was your youngest brother who jumped from his seat when the Reverend returned to the kitchen with a rather concerned expression on his face.

“She did. I see what you were talking about.”

“She is being completely irrational, isn’t she?”

“Judging by the emotional outbursts you have been describing… and her temper which I got to experience first-hand just now… I think I know what is causing her distress.”

Your oldest brother swallowed. “Is it… is it a demon?”

“No. Nothing of the like. It appears… it appears your sister is suffering from hysteria.”

“Hysteria? Is that… that is curable, right?”

William nodded. “I have a friend who is a medical practitioner. I have seen this type of behaviour before. There is no doubt.”

“Reverend… with all due respect but you know we are currently not in the financial position to afford—“

“I know,” he interrupted him gently, “I was not implying he’d come here. I… I know what to do. I can help and I believe, with God’s guidance, I will be able to cure her… if you let me.”

“Let you? Of course!”

“It is a rather unconventional method…”

“Reverend, whatever you need to do to help her, please do it. How will she ever find a husband behaving like this? How will she raise her children? You have to help her, no matter what it takes.”

William nodded, his expression stern. “The procedure will not hurt her, I promise you that.”

“Then go. Make this madness stop.”

Needless to say, he had never done anything like this before. Hearing someone’s confession in a dark room in church was one thing… but this? This was going to be an entirely different and quite frankly… intimate matter.

Taking a deep breath, he made his way back to your room and knocked once more. Your answer came promptly and when he let himself in, intuition advised him to lock the door for more privacy, pocketing the key… and to prevent you from running away from him screaming bloody murder. Only God knew what hysterical women were capable of.

“You’re back. Did you tell them? Will they finally leave me alone? W-what are you doing?”

William sighed. “I am here to help you.” You shuddered when he spoke your name and approached you, looking you deep in the eye. You were about to get lost in the blue of his irises when he suddenly averted his glance and offered you his hand. You hesitated. When you took it, he gently pushed you down on your bed so you came to lie on your back.

“Excuse me, what are you doing? What is your plan, do you want to drug me? Why did you lock the door?”

He uttered your name once more. “You have hysteria.”

“I have what?! Have you lost your mind now?” So much for being rational. He was worse than your brothers! Goodness, what… “You are mad is what you are! Get out!”

You gasped when he wrapped his hand around your wrists, gripping them tightly to stop your weak attempts to fight him off, even more so when he slipped his free hand between your legs and lifted your dress, his fingers reaching for the hem of your knickers. Your eyes widened. Mortified, you kicked at him, struggling to no avail. He might have been a Reverend but he had the strength of a lumberjack.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Don’t curse like that. It’s okay. I can help you. Let me help you.”

“You are in dire need of help yourself, Reverend. Do my brothers know about this?” In other words… if you screamed for help, would they come to your rescue?

“They allowed me to perform this treatment on you. Have faith. I promise I will not harm you.”

“Ha! You currently have your hand on my private parts, you… you pervert, you…” You yelped, horrified, when he tore your knickers off, revealing your cunt to his blue eyes and for just a brief second, you believed to see arousal flashing in them. One second was all you needed, with your heart pounding in your chest, as he let his guard down and you snatched your left hand back, striking him across the face.

The slap echoed through your entire room, forcing his head to the side and quickly forming a red spot on his cheek, your palm stung from the impact. The Reverend growled. Keeping a hold of your other wrist, he reached for the belt around his trousers and unbuckled it one-handed.

“You will end up hurting yourself.” He muttered—and the very moment you wondered how he did not sound angry at all was the moment he used to flip you around so you came to lie on your stomach with your face pressed against the pillow. You breathed in sharply, attempting to roll over when he had already grabbed your wrists again and tied them together behind your back using his belt. When he flipped you back around, you kicked your legs out in vain, your lower lip shaking—whether from imminent arousal or fear, you could not tell.

Next thing you knew, you could feel the tips of his fingers ghosting ever so slightly over your lips, parting them as tenderly as he would a pair of rose petals to free your clitoris. His thumb pressed down on it applying gentle but delicious pressure, circling it with slow but firm movements and making you jerk all the while he rested his free hand on your chest to feel your heartbeat.

He knew what to do, of course. He had done it before, with Stella. Only she had not suffered from hysteria.

And as he kept going with his affections, he witnessed you growing more and more aroused. William’s eyes locked with yours when your breathing changed, his digits feeling the wetness pooling between your legs as he massaged your cunt, paying special attention to your sensitive little nub peeking out from its hiding spot now, hardening and begging for more with every single touch of his.

Your own body began to betray you, a whimper escaping your lips.

“Shhh… it’s okay. It’s okay. Have faith in God.”

“S-stop t-this… please… you can’t just… you can’t…” But soon, the pleasure became too much for you to form any more functioning sentences, to ask him to stop because… because there was a part of you longing for him to give you more. Failing to resist him any longer, you finally relaxed on the bed with your lips parted, listening to the Reverend’s rapid breathing. He swallowed when your arousal grew audible and his slick fingers sent delicious sounds of bliss through your room.

Your toes curled and you tensed up, your hands behind your back clutching at the bed sheets and William knew he had brought you to where he had wanted you—to the brink of orgasm. You moaned when he slipped two of his long digits into your warmth, feeling you clench around them rhythmically as your peak of pleasure rippled through you like jolts of electricity, making you shake and lose control over your senses.

Once your climax subsided… you felt at peace, relaxed. Like the Reverend had taken all of your stress, all of your worries and all of your fears from you.

You were covered in sweat when his hand finally retreated and he, respecting your modesty for what it was worth after this, covered you again.

“How do you feel?” He asked.

You felt better. Relaxed. Like you could conquer the world. But you were not going to admit that he had been successful—if only a little bit.

“No different than prior to… this.” You choked out instead. William stood—when he had knelt down you did not know but when he did, you noticed the considerable bulge that had formed in his trousers. Your lips parted. So doing this to you had given him pleasure too. He had enjoyed doing this to you.

Part of you was flattered. The other was furious, even more so when he followed your curious gaze. Guilt flitted across his face.

“You say you act in the name of God but at the end of the day, all you are is just another man driven by lust and the primal need for power. I pity you, William Ransome.”

The Reverend sighed. “Come. I’ll untie you.”

Passively, you let him roll you onto your side so he could remove the belt which had felt oddly pleasant on your skin. As soon as your hands were free, you slapped him hard—again.

The Reverend closed his eyes for a moment. Two seconds, maybe three. Eventually, he took one more look at you and made his way to the door. He unlocked it and left without another word, presumably returning to your brothers to report to them how it had gone.

-

“Reverend! Good Lord, what happened up there? Is she alright? I heard her screaming…” William was surprised the young brothers had not eavesdropped, pressing their ears against your door. When he met them again in the kitchen, they appeared even more agitated than before.

“Yes. Yes, your sister is fine but…”

Their eyes widened. “But what?”

“But I am afraid she will need more treatment.”

-

A/N: No gif because... well... the series isn’t really out yet? I might also make this a 3 Part Story. Interested, anyone? *grins innocently*

[something-tofightfor]

Too Late

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (Ink AU)

Word Count: 7403

Rating: R (language, aftermath of physical abuse of a female, talk of drug use)

Author’s Note: This is meant to be read after both Ink and Ransom. It’s kind of a filler piece, but it was necessary to getting to what I really wanted to get to: William getting put into his place. 

Summary: It’s been a little over two weeks since you were rescued from William. How’s you body healing? How’s your mind? ... How’s Logan handling it? 

He watched you as you slept in his bed, the golden rays of sunlight filtering in through the cracks in the blinds and illuminating your skin. She looks so much better. Your arm was out of the sling, but the other was still in a brace - less bulky than the first one, but designed to keep you from bending your elbow too far, too soon. You were on your back, head turned to the side so that your cheek was pressed against the pillow, and one hand was resting on your stomach over the sheets, fingers splayed. Logan knew that it was shielding the area that had been stapled and bandaged, though that wound, too was well on its way to being healed. So much better. 

 The sunburn had faded within a week, the gel that had been applied in the Mesa continually being used on your back, shoulders, arms and face in the days following your return to California. Sometimes you put it on yourself, but Logan was always quick to take over for the places you couldn’t reach, long fingers gently caressing the inked skin of your back and shoulders as you stood or sat in front of him, allowing him to touch you in the only way that was possible. He’d kissed you - plenty of times - but was always careful to keep both of you from getting carried away, holding your hands tightly in his so that he wasn’t more tempted than usual to touch you, always pulling away from you when he felt you leaning in or angling your head to kiss him more deeply or trying to pull your hands free. The disappointment in your eyes would have been mirrored in his own, but Logan was careful to hide that, too, not wanting you to feel worse about your situation than you already did. Soon. 

 He understood it - the guilt you were feeling for needing someone to rescue you, for everyone believing your story when no one had taken his seriously, for feeling like a burden to him, needing Logan to help you in the shower for the first week, and then continuing to need his help when it came time to do things like wash or brush your hair. But Logan never let you feel guilty for long, because he knew the impact of the emotion all too well, and knew how quickly it could consume you. He didn’t think that you’d follow his path down, and if you’d even hinted that that’s the way you were going, he would have intervened immediately. But Logan could see how hard you were fighting, how focused you were on getting through the pain and recovery with nothing stronger than the prescription Tylenol they’d given you, hiding the amount of pain that he knew you were really in. She’s not like me. 

 He also understood why you were fighting so hard to heal, and knew that that reason was why you were so willing to let him help you, to stay with him, even though it was embarrassing to need someone’s help as much as you needed his. But  I’d do anything for her, she has to know that. William had been flown home and was awaiting trial though it wouldn’t be a traditional courtroom case, but things couldn’t progress until you were strong enough to sit in on it and contribute your side of the story, which motivated you to focus on your recovery. 

 Logan had been with you when you deplaned in California, a car taking you to the Delos facility where you’d spoken to officials there, answering questions that hadn’t been answered at the Mesa, but since then, there’d been nothing, aside from a few meetings with your legal team to see how you were doing and to update you on their case status. You hadn’t left his house since you’d been back, and despite the circumstances, Logan was enjoying having you all to himself. Not for much longer. It’s almost time to…  He stood from the chair he was sitting in, stepping around the small desk and next to the bed, lowering himself and saying your name softly, one hand reaching out to cover yours. I don’t want to wake you, but I have to. “Hey.” 

 Your eyes opened, chest rising as you took a deep breath, and Logan felt himself smiling as you reached out for him, your fingers closing around his forearm, your own lips quirking up into a sleepy smile. “How long was I out for?” You swallowed, stretching and letting out a quiet hiss as the fingers beneath his tightened against your stomach. “Ribs still…shit.” You pushed yourself into a sitting position, hiding your wince with a yawn. “I didn’t mean to-”

 “You slept all day, pretty much.” He smiled at you, eyes moving over your face. “Must’ve needed it.” He heard you laugh, head moving up and down as you nodded. “You can go back to bed if you want, I just wanted to see if you wanted to…” He paused before squeezing your hand. “Juliet’s stopping over, and I didn’t know if you -”

 “Maybe, Logan.” He saw your eyes flash, heard you sigh. “I haven’t seen her in a couple days, it’s a lot to deal with. She…” You met his gaze, an apologetic look in your eyes. “I know why she’s acting the way she is, but I’ve already got one Delos taking care of me, I don’t need another one to hover.” No, you don’t. You yawned again, eyes closing, and Logan stayed quiet as you rolled your neck, a quiet ‘pop’ audible before you looked back at him. “I’m still so tired, Logan, I don’t want to -”

 “So.” He leaned in, one hand reaching up to push a strand of hair behind your ear. “You’re tired because your immune system is shit right now.” He pressed his lips to your cheek, feeling you smile again before he pulled away. “The dehydration and sunburn did a lot of damage, and it’s going to take a while for you to feel better, even though the burn’s faded and other things are healing.” Logan waited, thinking. “But that’s where I come in. I’m makin’ sure that you’re eating and drinking what you need to, and that you’re not just sittin’ here without…” He felt his shoulders slump, remembering how quickly he’d lost weight, how weak he’d become, even after all of his visible injuries had faded. “Without a plan. You’ll feel much better soon, and I’m sure the doctor will tell you the same thing next time you see him.” 

 “I know, but I feel lazy, Logan, like I’m not doing anything but sleeping in your bed and laying on your couch and eating your food.” You turned your head to look out the window, lower lip drawn into your mouth. “It’s been two weeks, and I don’t… I should be…”

 “There’s no timeline for this.” He said your name again, one hand running through his hair, the other uselessly back on his lap. “You’ll get better when you get better, and if it takes a month, it takes a month. If it takes two, that’s what… that’s what’s going to happen. We - Delos can only do so much, the rest has to happen on its own. You’re doing everything you need to, and I promise you that once you get that brace off and can take a deep breath without feeling like someone’s punching you in the side, you’ll feel better.” You met his eyes again and he saw that you looked exhausted, the fatigue on your face unable to be concealed, even though he could tell you were trying. 

 “This isn’t me, Logan, I shouldn’t feel like this.” Don’t do this to yourself. 

 “I know. Believe me, I know, but you -”

 “I wish you didn’t.” You reached up with the arm in the brace, thumb stroking over his cheek. “I wish you hadn’t had to…”

 “No.” He leaned into your touch, feeling his lip curl as he spoke. “You shouldn’t have had to deal with this. I wish you didn’t know what it felt like to be…” He thought of the desert, the blinding sun, the burning sand beneath his feet. I should have taken him down before he did this to her. “But I need you to believe me when I tell you that I know what I’m talking about, and you will feel better soon.” Not soon enough. “I’m gonna make sure of it.” He kissed you then, leaning in to take your lower lip between his teeth briefly and applying a little more pressure than he had been, catching you by surprise. You reached out with both hands, one of them pressed against his chest, the other hand on his upper arm as he kissed you, his fingers tangling in your hair. You pulled back first, and Logan was relieved to feel you nodding as you laid your head against his shoulder, the weight of your body comforting against his. I’ve missed that. Missed her.

 “I know you will, Logan.” You sat up with him for a few minutes, the room silent aside from the sounds of your breathing, and then you spoke again, clearing your throat. “I think… I think I’m going to skip out on seeing Juliet tonight if that’s alright.” You pulled away from him, settling back against the headboard, one hand playing with the blankets on your lap. “I don’t… I don’t feel like trying to -”

 “That’s fine. I’ll just tell her you’re sleeping, I’m sure she won’t be here for long anyway, she’s gotta go home to Em, and… shes been trying to spend as much time with her as possible since …” He stopped speaking before he finished the sentence, not wanting to say William’s name in front of you. “Since she’s basically a single parent now.” 

 “It’s better that way,” you muttered before you widened your eyes and met Logan’s again, head moving back and forth quickly. “I didn’t mean that, I…” 

 “No, it’s true. Em’s better off without him and so’s Juliet. The whole world will be, actually, and when he’s …” Logan trailed off. Stop. She doesn’t need to hear this right now. “Doesn’t matter now. You don’t have to come down, it’s fine.” You relaxed against the wood behind you and Logan stood, looking back over his shoulder at you. “Think about what you want for dinner, and we’ll eat after she leaves.” Logan glanced down at his watch as you told him you would, feeling himself smile at the sound of your voice agreeing with him. She’s still got an appetite… that’s definitely different than me. 

 --- 

 They were sitting out on the back deck, Juliet’s long legs curled up under her body in the rapidly fading light, Logan’s stretched out in front of him as his eyes scanned the horizon. Juliet had been understanding of your absence though Logan also saw a look of disappointment cross her features, and after he’d poured two drinks, they’d made their way outside, sitting and talking about Emily for a few minutes before falling into a less than comfortable silence. What does she want to say? He studied his sister’s profile - curly brown hair loose around her face and blowing in the wind off of the ocean, one finger of the hand not holding her glass tracing the rim of it slowly, eyes downcast. “Juliet, what’s going on?” Logan couldn’t handle the silence anymore, and though his sister didn’t answer right away, Logan could tell by the way she reacted that he wasn’t going to like what she had to say. 

 “I just…” Juliet took a long drink, ice clinking against the side of the glass before she continued. “I can’t believe that this is…” She set the empty drink down, turning her upper body toward Logan. “It’s been two weeks, Logan, why isn’t she better… I need this to…” He felt himself stiffen, jaw clenching. What? “He’s just sitting in a cell, and she’s… are her burns all better? How’s her arm? Can… has she talked to…” 

 “What are you asking me, Juliet?” Logan sipped his drink, trying to collect himself without overreacting. “William is exactly where he should be for now, and she’s doing what she can to get into a position where she can testify, but it’s going to take some time, her arm’s still…” He paused, thinking. “You’re not saying you want him home, right? With you and Em, and -”

 “No, of course not, but he’d never… he’s never… he wouldn’t.” Logan laughed, eyes closing. He would. He did. Twice. “They won’t let me see the tape, or the Host files, or… they won’t let me talk to him, Logan. I just want to -”

 “Why? What could he possibly say that you’d want to hear, Juliet?” Logan felt the anger growing in his chest, filling it in a way that was similar to the feeling of hopelessness that he’d felt back after coming home from the hospital himself. Is that why you’ve tried to spend so much time with her? Why you’re so interested? “None of it would be true, it would all be more of the same, more of William trying to convince you that he couldn’t hurt anyone, that he… that it was just a narrative gone wrong.”

 “We’ve been married for years, Logan. He’s never hurt me, never hurt Emily, never even hinted that he could do anything like what he did to her.” Are you kidding me? Juliet shook her head, and Logan leaned in, seeing that she was holding back tears. “I know that he did this to her, but I don’t understand why, and I just want to understand, Logan. I need to know what made him -” Logan stood, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring down at Juliet, the look in his eyes hard. 

 “You know why he did this, Juliet. I tried to tell you when I… when he did the same goddamn thing to me, but you didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want to believe me. You or Dad.” He laughed, the sound bitter. “You saw what he did to me, Juliet. Saw me when I came back from the park, when I was in the hospital, when I got home. You saw what he was capable of then, but it was easier for you to blow it off and take his word over mine. Why? What made it so easy for you to believe him, Juliet?” His voice was even but firm, and Logan began to pace, scratching the side of his head and then gesturing with two fingers, his eyes wide. “He fucking tried to kill me, left me to die in the desert because I killed a fucking Host, and you couldn’t -”

 “He was my fiance, Logan. I loved him, I wanted to b-” He felt something inside of him break, Logan whirling around and stopping in front of Juliet, both hands at his sides. 

 “I’m your brother. Your goddamn brother, and you would have rather believed him than me? Dad, I understand, but you?” He felt prickling in his eyes and rubbed at them with the back of one hand, willing himself not to cry. “I never understood it, you know that? Why William was there when I woke up, sitting next to my bed instead of you.” He watched Juliet straighten up, lips set in a thin line. “Why, after I lost my shit seeing him that day and the doctors had to sedate me again, you still didn’t believe me.” Logan swallowed hard, wrinkling his nose. “It’s been years, Juliet, since you watched me almost fucking die for the second and third and fourth times because I was so goddamn alone, and couldn’t handle living with myself because of what he did.” 

 “Logan, I didn’t… I don’t…” She gripped the arm of the chair she sat on, her eyes on his face. “You never…”

 “You didn’t think anything was off when I started using? When every single time you saw me I was out of my mind and on something? When I didn’t give a shit about Delos or what happened to me? You didn’t stop to think that maybe I was telling the truth - even just about one thing?” His voice rose, the words pouring out of him in a way that he didn’t understand - but didn’t try to stop. “When was I ever like that before, Juliet? Not even when Mom died, or, or when I lost that deal with the startup before Argos. None of it got to me, but one fucking trip into the desert with Billy was enough to -”

 “Logan, you sat in the sun for days.” She spoke quietly, her posture relaxing slightly. “We didn’t know what it had done to you, and when you came home, you were… different.” Juliet licked her lips, rubbing at her forehead with her fingertips. “I thought that keeping things as normal as possible would help you, that it would be what you wanted.” She stopped, letting out a small sigh, and it took Logan only half a second to respond, the tears finally falling. 

 “What I wanted? I wanted my sister. I wanted my father - wanted them to believe me when I …” He rubbed a hand over his face, his palm coming away wet. Fuck. “I wanted you away from William and William away from Delos, but you married him, Jules. You got pregnant, and everything changed. You didn’t believe me before, and then? God, there was no chance. I had no one.” 

 “You had me, Logan, you -” No. No, you don’t get to do this. 

 “He flaunted you, Jules. He’d… fuck, he made sure I saw the two of you together all the time, that when I was there he was all over you, but in his way, so that you didn’t suspect.” Logan sniffled, looking out over the yard and pausing. “I didn’t have you, because he had you, and he had you right where he wanted you. Especially after you got pregnant, and then… then after you had Em? I was down, Juliet. All the way. I saw what was left for me and Dad didn’t care and you didn’t care, and… and then I didn’t care anymore. What did it matter? No one believed me, all they saw was Logan the junkie, Logan the failure. William… William was… the solution to everything, even though he was really the cause of everything.” He took a breath, feeling his hands clench into fists at his sides. “When I woke up in that hospital the last time, and no one was there? It would have been easy to give up, and that’s what he wanted. Both of them, probably.” Logan paused. Should I say it? “Maybe even you, too. It would have been so much easier if I just… was gone, hmm? You wouldn’t have to worry about me anymore, wouldn’t have to wait for that next call, wouldn’t -”

 “How could you think that, Logan?” Her voice trembled and Juliet leaned forward, staring up at him. “You’re my -”

 “Don’t even give me that “you’re my brother” bullshit. That didn’t make you believe me before, what would have changed?” Logan laughed, rubbing both hands over his face, fingers dragging through his beard. “But I didn’t give up. I decided I needed to find proof.” He sat back down, elbows against his thigh as he leaned in. “Proof of what he did to me and how he hid it, proof of what he was capable of.” She gasped, but Logan was on a roll, continuing after pausing to take a breath. “And I finally found it, Juliet, and he must have known somehow, must have… figured out that he hadn’t hidden everything as well as he thought, because that’s why he did this to her. He thought she was helping me, thought she was -”

 “There’s no way that’s that’s the reason, Logan. He wouldn’t hurt -” 

 “It is the reason, Juliet.” What? 

 --- 

 Logan whipped his head toward the doorway, where you were standing, and you met his eyes briefly, taking the few steps across the patio to sit down next to the man before reaching out to take his hand. He’s right here. “That’s all he said to me - over and over, while we were in the desert. He wanted to know what I knew, what Logan had told me, what I was doing to help him.” You looked down at your joined hands, watching as Logan’s thumb moved over yours. “Why do you believe that he did this to me, Juliet, when you didn’t believe Logan? Because there’s two of us telling you that it’s what happened?” Your heart was pounding, but you knew that you needed to ask. You’d heard more of the conversation than you’d admit; their words carrying up and in through the open bedroom window, and after it became apparent that Juliet wasn’t going to budge, you’d climbed out of bed, painstakingly pulling on a t-shirt over your tank top and twisting your hair over one shoulder before heading downstairs. She needs to see me, she needs to hear this. 

 “I see you now, I saw you in the hospital, I heard it in Logan’s voice when he called and told me…” Juliet wiped beneath both eyes, staring at you without blinking. “I have no reason to doubt you.” 

 “You had no reason to doubt me either, Juliet.” Logan spoke quietly and in a tone that you’d never heard him use before. “I never lied - not to you, not to anyone, and when all I needed was someone to believe me? No one did.” 

 “Logan, I… you…” She stumbled over the words, sounding more and more unsure with each syllable. “How could I just…”

“Is that why you were so quick to take my side?” You reached up to touch the front of your shoulder through your shirt, fingers rubbing over the area that Logan had tattooed. I  trusted him. I still do. “Were you trying to make up for not believing Logan? You still didn’t want to think that your husband could do something like this, but…” Logan pulled his hand from yours, putting it against your back, up between your shoulders. “But the second time, there was no way to ignore it?” Logan said your name quietly, a warning in his tone, but you couldn’t stop yourself from saying one more thing, the words leaving your lips with a bite that you didn’t think you were capable of. “There’s no ignoring this. He did this to me just like he did this to Logan, and both times, he thought we’d die before anyone got to us to stop him... And he was OK with that.” 

 “He’s been under a lot of pressure at work lately, he must have just snap…” Juliet trailed off, looking down at her hands, where you saw that she was still wearing her wedding band, though the engagement ring was missing. Are you kidding me? “It could have been anyone, any one of Logan’s… you weren’t a target, it doesn’t make sense, he just…”

 “Jesus, Juliet, come on.” Logan’s hand slid down your back and then his arm wrapped around your waist, his fingers settling at your hip and tightening. “He told her - told me why he kidnapped her, just like he told me what he fucking wanted when he sent me off on that horse. There’s no question about it, he did this as a warning to me.” Anyone? She thinks it… “After I tried to tell you and Dad about what he did to me and neither of you gave a shit, I decided not to say anything until I knew I could prove it, and then… then she came along, and I couldn’t…” You thought back to the moments when Logan had been open with you, telling you in halting speech at first about what William had done and then opening up to you fully the night you’d both gotten tattooed, spilling the whole story. “She believed me, Juliet, believed that he did that to me, that there was a reason for how I acted, that  I wasn’t crazy, that… I had a reason to make the choices I did, and that every right to be focused on exposing him.” I did. 

 “Juliet, how many … people did Logan go to the park with between that first trip with W… with him and this last time with me?” Her eyes widened as she thought. “A lot, right? I don’t know how many, but it’s been a lot. I know that Logan likes to travel with someone, so…” You shrugged, wincing as you thought of Logan in the park with someone else, in the Mesa with someone else. They’re not important. Not anymore. “This wasn’t an accident. This wasn’t random. This was planned. He helped two men steal horses months ago. He knew what he was doing, and he was just waiting until I’d be there without Logan.” Saying it out loud made you feel sick to your stomach, but it was the truth and she needed to hear it. I’m done with this. “I understand wanting to believe in the man you love. I understand being in disbelief that he could do something like this to your brother, and I also get that Logan’s behavior following that trip made it even harder for you to understand.” 

 “It did. It does. But I… why you?” Juliet shook her head. “Even if you were helping Logan, what’s the motivation for my brother to spend days trying to find you? He wouldn’t want anything to happen to you because you’re close, but why not just call the recovery team and tell them to go to the location of the Hosts William was with? It would have gotten to you sooner, and…”

 “It was personal.” Logan pulled you closer, leaning over to kiss the side of your head briefly. “He was trying to scare me into stopping, wanted me to see what he’d done, what he could do, to know that I hadn’t been able to save her, to watch someone… someone that I love beg for their life.” Juliet’s eyes widened as Logan spoke, moving between both of you before they finally settled on your face, disbelief filling them. “Before it was about the company, about my reputation, because that’s what I cared about, but now? This time?” 

 “Someone you… Logan, are you…?” Her brow furrowed. “You love her? But she’s….” You stiffened, feeling Logan do the same next to you. I’m what? “I thought this was just fun for you, that she was a distraction, that…” Juliet covered her face with her hand, taking a deep breath. “You’ve never been serious about anyone before, Logan, and I saw you guys on the yacht over the summer, you wanted me to tell you what I… but I didn’t think…” Your opinion of Juliet was shifting by the moment, and though you understood that part of her reaction was grief, it still hurt that she was talking about you as if you weren’t in front of her - and like it was impossible for Logan to feel anything more than physical attraction for you. 

 “I do. And William is a lot of things, but he isn’t stupid, Juliet. He watched me - watched us, and he… he saw it, and he knew I’d do anything to find her, because I know when it’s not a game in there, Juliet. The Hosts can’t hurt people in there, but people?” Logan stood abruptly, reaching his hand out to you, which you took without hesitation. “It’s a different story, and William knew exactly what he was capable of and what he wanted to happen.” 

 “But that doesn’t make sense, how would he… even if you hadn’t gotten her out in time, Logan, what would William have… a body is…” Juliet’s resolve was dwindling by the second, and though you tried, you didn’t feel sorry for her. I don’t feel anything. “He wouldn’t have killed her, he couldn’t have -” Logan moved before you spoke, using the hand that wasn’t holding yours to lift the hem of your shirt, your arms hanging at your sides without moving. You need to see. 

 “Yeah, Juliet? This doesn’t look like “couldn’t” or “wouldn’t” to me.” The woman gasped at the sight of your still healing abdomen, the scar tissue red and raised, tender to the touch. “Just wait til you hear the audio from this, wait until you hear your husband taking all his shit out on her, someone who only made the mistake of trusting me.” Logan let go of your shirt, stepping toward his sister. “You feel guilty that you didn’t see it? I get that. You feel ashamed that you married him and had a kid with him? I get that, too. But it’s nothing, Juliet, to the way I feel knowing that I left her alone with him knowing what the fuck he was capable of.” You sucked in a breath, head moving back and forth. Oh, Logan, no. Stop. “I know you, Juliet, or at least I thought I did, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you felt so fucking bad about not believing me that you’re trying to make up for it now by believing that this happened, but it’s not going to work. It’s too late for me to just pretend that I’m alright with the way you acted, the fact that you didn’t even consider that I could be telling you the truth when I needed you to.” Logan whipped his head back and forth, breath leaving him in a huff. “You supporting her means a hell of a lot, but you’re still… you still don’t get it.” 

 “Logan.” You finally spoke again, reaching for his arm, your fingers closing around it. “Stop. She doesn’t… it’s not a big deal.” It is, but this isn’t helping anyone. You understood where he was coming from, how hurt he had to feel at the way Juliet was trying so hard to understand what had happened to you and why while still making excuses for William. She’s got to be in shock, that has to… 

 “It does matter.” Logan turned to face you, his back to Juliet and one hand rising to your face, the tips of his fingers tracing over the skin of your cheek. “Because you matter, and your life matters and not a single goddamn thing about this is fair, but -” He licked his lips, nose wrinkling. “Her tryin’ to say she’s concerned and then turning it around and sayng there’s things we don’t know when it’s pretty fuckin’ clear that we do? They don’t get to do this again. They did it to me, and they won’t do it to you.” Logan, I don’t… it’s going to … he isn’t going to get away with this. “You’ll see, Juliet.” Logan’s eyes closed before he turned back to his sister, taking two steps away from you and toward the other woman, the fingers of his right hand running through his hair again before his arm went back to his side. “You’ll know, and then maybe you’ll finally believe that everything he ever told you and did for you and promised you and Dad was a goddamn lie.” 

 Juliet held her ground, her eyes on her brother and the expression he wore. It was determined, but it was also filled with sadness, and you thought that the two had never looked more similar. “Logan, I …” She closed her eyes. “I didn’t know that you felt…” Her eyes moved to you briefly and you watched as they filled with regret. “I’ve been… it’s…” 

 “You should go, Juliet.” He spoke quietly, voice firm. “I appreciate you comin’ to check on her, but I think it’s time for you to leave.” Wordlessly, Juliet nodded and grabbed her purse, turning away without even saying goodbye and stepping toward the patio door. You heard it slide open, but neither you or Logan moved, the only sounds coming from the faint crashing of the waves against the shore until you heard Juliet take a deep breath. Here it comes. But there were no words, and a few seconds later, you heard the soft click of the door latching shut as she closed it, and then you and Logan were alone again, the man still a few feet in front of you. 

 You stayed still, unsure of what your next move would be, but when you saw Logan’s shoulders slump, the man turning and lowering himself back onto the couch he’d been sitting on previously, you followed him, leaving space between you. “Logan, are you -”

 “Just give me a minute.” Startled at the way he spoke to you, you went quiet, lowering your eyes to your hands, which were resting on your lap, fingers interlaced. I… he’s never… “Please.” The followup question lacked the strength of his initial request, but you nodded anyway, confused, thoughts returning to Juliet’s surprise at the way Logan had declared that he loved you and her unwillingness to believe that it was true. Why would he lie about it? What would he have to gain? You frowned, closing your eyes. Why is is so unbelievable that he could… “She still doesn’t believe me.” He sounded defeated and your attention was immediately drawn back to Logan’s face, though the man wasn’t looking at you. “He did the same goddamn thing, and this time there’s no doubt, and she …”

 “She loved him, Logan. She probably still does, at least partly.” You shrugged, reaching over and putting your hand on Logan’s back. “You can’t just turn something like that off, even when the other person does something like… like he did to me.” You winced at the words. And what he did to you, too. “And I’m pretty sure she believes you, especially now with my…” He turned his head to look at you, eyes locked with yours. “But that doesn’t mean that she… that she can understand how he can be so different than the man she married.”

 “You’re defendin’ her?” He narrowed his eyes at you, tongue moving over his lips. “After she -”

 “Logan, she understands that he’s dangerous, that she can’t try to bail him out so that he can come home. She’s… in denial.” You dropped your hand, letting it hit the cushions. “But she’s not stupid, she understands what this means.” You took a breath. “She’ll have to divorce him, and that’s going to look horrible, but she’s also going to have to explain to Emily that her dad’s not going to be around.” Logan’s eyes widened. “She has a lot to think about, Logan, and it goes way beyond what he did to me - and even what he did to you, because she’s… she’s thinking about herself, about how she didn’t see it, about how she ignored it, about… about how everything in her life is about to change.” He shifted on the seat next to you, never looking away from your face. 

 “I’ve never talked to her like that, not in… fuck, not ever.” Logan paused. “And I’ve never wanted to, not even when I was usin’, when she was takin Jim’s and William’s sides, when… but now she’s questioning you, and your injuries and the way I feel about you and -”

 “Logan, we’ve only been together for a few months, and it’s gotta be a shock for her - on top of everything else - to hear that her brother’s changed his mind about being with one person and one person only.” He finally smiled at that - it was barely a smirk but still there, and you took it as a sign. “Sometimes I st-”

 “You questionin’ me too?” He leaned in closer, hands moving from where they’d been to rest on your thighs, grip tightening as he spoke. “Why’s it so hard to believe that I…” You cut him off by leaning in to kiss him, fingers curling around the bottom edge of his t-shirt. Pulling away reluctantly to take a breath, you opened your eyes to look at him, speaking carefully. 

 “No. I’m not questioning you, especially not after the way you’ve been with me since we’ve been back in California.” He raised an eyebrow, waiting. “You wouldn’t be doing all of this for me and to help me if you didn’t care.” Chewing on your lower lip for a few seconds, you continued. “Guilt makes people do a lot of things, but Logan, this is way more than that, and I think… I think she knows that as well as I do, and it scares her.” 

 “I do feel guilty, though, because he shouldn’t have…. It shouldn’t have taken this to be able to …” He looked lost - just for a few seconds - and then recovered. “But you’re right, this isn’t about guilt, it’s about needing to make sure that you’re doin’ alright and that you recover from this without doing what I did.” He lifted one hand from your leg and let his fingers trail up your bare arm, resting his palm on your shoulder. “Because I love you, and don’t want you to think that I don’t.”  He sounded vulnerable, but you didn’t let him pause for long before you leaned in again, resting your head against his shoulder and ignoring the pain in your side. 

 “She isn’t going to handle hearing what he said or seeing those videos well, Logan. She’s going to… it’ll kill her.” He stayed quiet, shifting next to you and putting his arm around you as he turned to kiss the top of your head. “But as soon as she does, there won’t be any doubt, especially since him telling Tanner who I was and what to look for and when to ride in is all on there.” Logan agreed with you, humming quietly. “That’s why it’s so hard to be around her, because every time it’s like she’s waiting for me to tell her this is all a misunderstanding, that by some miracle he isn’t a… a monster, and I can’t do that. Even if he didn’t…” You ran your fingers over your abdomen, feeling the wound through your shirt. “Do this to us, it’d always be there, and he can’t… he doesn’t get Delos. He doesn’t get your sister, and he doesn’t get to pretend like he’s not doing anything wrong.” Logan’s body went rigid next to you as you said your next words. “Even if you and I weren’t together or you hadn’t told me how you felt? I’d still see this through.” 

 You knew that if those things hadn’t been true, the likelihood of William choosing you would have been slim to none, but the man hadn’t had confirmation that Logan loved you; he’d only seen you and Logan together a few times, only had an idea of what you meant to the man sitting next to you - so there was still a chance. “But we are together.” Logan tugged on your shoulder, pulling you upward into a sitting position and forcing you to meet his gaze. “And I… you know how I feel, so…” He glanced down. “So there’s no reason to think about anything else.” You’re right. “I’m sorry that you had to hear that conversation,” he continued, saying your name quietly. “It shoulda been between me an’ her, because you’ve gotta focus on what comes next.” 

 “Stop.” You stood, putting your hand on your hip and rolling your eyes. “I can do two things at once, and her seeing - and hearing - me say these things now might make what she hears later a little less difficult to listen to.” 

 “It won’t.” Logan stood too, smoothly moving to walk behind you, heading for the door. “Nothing’s gonna make that easier for her, but that’s not your problem.” He too paused in front of the glass door, looking back at you. “You don’t owe anyone a goddamn thing.” Deciding to lighten the mood, you followed the man back into his house, taking a seat at the bar that separated his kitchen and living room and watching as Logan stood in front of the fridge, looking through the contents. 

 “You’re wrong, Logan.” Waiting for him to turn, you leaned forward, bending your good elbow and resting your chin atop it. Head cocked to the side, he watched you, amused. “I owe you a couple things as soon as my ribs and arms feel better.” He laughed at that, and you watched as the look in his eyes shifted back into one that you hadn’t seen in weeks. He’s been so careful, but it’s… he still wants me. “I wish it could be right now.” Logan stepped away from the refrigerator, keeping the counter between you as he leaned in, reaching over to grip the side of your neck, thumb settling behind your ear. 

 “You have no idea,” he whispered, leaning in as far as he could to kiss you, lips lingering. “No idea how much I want that, too.” He traced his tongue along your lips without warning, causing you to part them, and before you could react, Logan was kissing you deeply, his long fingers holding onto the edge of the counter the only thing you saw before your eyes shut. When he finally pulled back, the groan leaving his lips identical to the one that escaped yours, you watched Logan swallow as he straightened up, running his fingers through his hair and eyeing you. “But we’re gonna wait til you’re better, because…” He pressed his lips together, resting his elbows back on the countertop and eyeing you from a safe distance. “Because I won’t hurt you… or even risk it just to get off. It’s not worth it.” He’s talking about himself, about when he…  

 Anyone that looked at Logan would be able to make a lot of assumptions about him - about his character and personality, about what he expected from life - and many of them would be right, you knew. But as the two of you eyed each other across the gleaming granite, you knew that even more of them would have been wrong. No, you won’t. No matter how much I’d beg, you wouldn’t. Not with me. “I know.” It was only two words, but you caught the relief in his eyes, realizing that he’d expected you to fight with him. “Because the sooner I’m better, Logan? The sooner we can put that piece of shit where he belongs for the rest of his life… and go back to living ours.” You weren’t sure exactly what that meant - at least in terms of being with Logan, but you knew that it meant no more careful touches, no more barriers between your bodies when you kissed - and no more hesitation. “As long as that’s what you want.” Adding in the final sentence made you wince inwardly, but Logan’s smile was reply enough, the man quickly making his way to your side of the counter and moving behind you. “Logan, wh-”

 “Shh.” He wrapped his arms around you - carefully - crossing them over your chest and pulling you back against him, his head dropping down so that his lips made contact with the side of your neck. “It is.” You brought a hand up, fingers squeezing his forearm tightly and then raised it more, curling your fingers around the back of his head and dragging them through his hair. He didn’t need to say anything else because the way he was holding you said it all, and so you relaxed into his body, letting go of the conversation that you’d had with Juliet and focusing on Logan. 

 “Good.” He hummed a reply, kissing his way slowly across your skin, and you took as deep a breath as you could, eyes flying open at the realization that there was very little pain associated with the action. Logan mumbled an inquiry at your sharp inhale, his beard scratching against your skin, but he didn’t pull away and you shook your head slowly, fingers still moving lazily against his scalp. “Nothin’ Logan. Just starting to feel better, that’s all.” I’m going to be fine, and William’s finally going to get what he deserves. 

---

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[something-tofightfor]

Not Enough - 1

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (Ink AU)

Word Count: 7,700

Rating: R (language, aftermath of physical abuse of a female, talk of drug use, talk of kidnapping, a hint of zest)

Author’s Note: A followup to Too Late (and also Ink and Ransom) ... This one is going to be 2 or three parts total. 

Summary: It’s time to take the next step in order to move forward with William’s trial... and that includes facing some difficult topics... and people. 

He covered your body with his, chests pressed together, hands joined next to your head on the blankets as Logan’s hips met yours, the rocking motion of them more gentle than you were used to from him. You moaned his name - quietly, lips resting against the curve where his neck met his shoulder - and Logan groaned in response, his hair falling against the side of your face. “I know.” He spoke quietly to you, pushing down and causing your hands to sink into the bedding, your grip on him tightening as he balanced above you on his elbows. You could see him clearly in the early afternoon light, face inches from yours, eyes dark against his pale skin. I need you. 

 “Want to touch you, Logan, please let me…” He shook his head and you turned yours toward him, frustrated. Why not? Why won’t you… “Logan.” You heard him swear and then he was kissing you hard, more teeth than lips, his tongue pushing into your mouth after a few seconds, hands pulling free from yours and moving to your shoulders. You didn’t waste time, raising your arms and gripping his back, nails digging into his skin as you moved them down to his waist. It’s been too long, I … He said your name, pulling his mouth away from yours, and you opened your eyes, looking up at him. “What?” Logan’s eyes flashed before he closed them, tilting his head down. 

 “Time to wake up.” What? You frowned, hands freezing on his skin. What does he mean? You turned your head back to the side, your breathing getting faster. “Wake up.” No, I… You closed your eyes to the sound of Logan saying your name, repeating it over and over, and when you opened them, the room was dark and Logan’s weight was gone from on top of you. He said your name again and you turned your face toward the sound, finding Logan laying next to you, concern in his eyes. “Are you alright? You were movin’...” It was a dream? All of it? Raising a hand to your face, you turned away from Logan, trying to keep your disappointment hidden. I wanted it to be real.  “Hey.” He said your name again and then you felt his arm cross over your body, hand going to your cheek and turning your face back to look at him. Stop. “Talk to me.” 

 “I… I was…” You winced, not wanting to sound desperate. “I was dreaming about you, Logan, about…” You pressed your lips together. “We were…” Even in the dim light, you saw the smirk on his face - but only for a moment, because as he moved closer to you it was replaced by concern, his thumb stroking over your cheek. 

 “Dreamin’ about me? I’m right here, you don’t…” Yeah, I know. That’s the worst part. 

 “No, Logan, not just about you, about…” Your eyes closed again. “About being with you again, I…” 

 “I know.” He sighed, leaning in to kiss you gently. “I’m just giving you a hard time.” He paused, letting out a breath. “You know I don’t want it to be like this, but it’s only been a month, and I…” Yeah, yeah, gotta keep me from being hurt. With a single nod you rolled onto your side, careful not to trap your still healing arm beneath your body. “Your arm’s almost good, but your ribs still aren’t, and I can’t risk that.” He swallowed. “I won’t.” 

 “I know you won’t, Logan, but I… can you blame me?” You reached out, running your fingers up his bare chest. “It feels like this isn’t ever gonna be better, and…” I don’t know how long you’ll...

 “It will.” He kissed you again, the hand on your face slipping down your bare side and resting on your hip, though the blanket was still between his palm and your skin. “You’re almost back to normal, doctor said that everything’s healin’ well, and that cast you’ve got on your arm now is gonna help even more. It’s a prototype, but…” You knew that he was right; your arm had felt almost as good as new as soon as you’d removed the old brace and switched to the new lightweight cast from Delos’ medical product line - it was your ribs that were still the biggest concern. 

 If your arm had been the only thing still injured, you would have been able to convince Logan that you were fine - no questions asked. But it wasn’t your arms that Logan’s hands gravitated toward when he was in bed with you, and you knew that as soon as he was able to touch you again, he wouldn’t want to be restricted - or have to worry that he was hurting you. “I think…” You chewed on your lip,unsure of what to say to him. “I think I’m just worried about tomorrow, Logan.” You felt his fingers curl against you at the admission, and then he moved his hand to your back, urging you closer to him until you were chest to chest - just like in your dream. No, not just like it. “It’s going to be…” 

 “Not gonna lie to you,” Logan replied, voice quiet. “I’m not lookin’ forward to it either, and all I wanna do right now is…” Your face was tucked against his shoulder, but you still felt the change in his posture, his body going rigid against yours. “I know what I saw, and the little bit I heard, it’s going to be really bad hearin’ it all again, from the… from Tanner’s point of view.” It is. For me too. You and Logan were meeting with the Delos lawyers, along with William’s team for the first time to go over the contents of the Host’s memory before the case started - and you weren’t looking forward to it. 

 “You don’t have to come, Logan.” He was running his fingers up and down your back, tips tracing over the designs in the dark. “I can go by myself, and -”

 “No way.” Tone serious, Logan nearly growled your name. “I’m going. I’m going to be there with you. It going to be hard, but nowhere near as hard as it was for you to live through it.” It will be, though, because this is the second time you’ll hear the same bullshit from William’s mouth, the… “You’re not doin’ this alone.”  You didn’t reply right away, thinking through his words and about what he’d be hearing the following day. He’s going to lose it. He won’t like … not at all. “You’re not alone.” No, but you were. 

 “I know, Logan.” You kissed the skin at the center of his chest, nodding. “Thank you.” Both of you went silent, but after a minute or so, Logan spoke again, the seriousness all but gone.

 “You need to sleep now, but maybe…” He nuzzled against the top of your head, nose moving through your hair as his hands tightened against your back - just enough to comfort you further. “Maybe when we wake up tomorrow, we can talk about the fact that you were havin’ a sex dream about me while I slept next to you.” Stifling a laugh, you pushed him away from you and rolled onto your back. Asshole. “I know I’m good, but I -” 

 “Oh, shut up, Logan.” How many men and women have dreamed about you long after they’ve left your bed? He gripped your elbow, pulling you back toward him as he rolled onto his back, and you were surprised when he urged you to rest your arm and shoulder against his torso, stretching out the other arm over his chest. As you settled in, you felt content for the first time in days, the scent of Logan’s cologne faint but present, his body solid beneath you.

 “Can you get comfortable?” Assuring him that you could - and were - you waited for him to wrap his arm around you from behind, holding you in place.”Go to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.” Content, you began breathing deeply as you closed your eyes, Logan’s long fingers trailing slowly up and down your arm. Please don’t let me dream about him like that again, I can’t wake up and not have… Logan held you close, and within a few minutes, you were drifting off. Maybe I’ll sleep through tomorrow…

 --- 

 The two of you sat in the car in front of the Delos legal offices, but neither of you made any move to get out and walk into the building. “I’m scared, Logan.” You didn’t want to sound weak, didn’t want to sound nervous, but the truth was that you knew that reliving the experience would be difficult for you. You hadn’t heard William’s voice in over a month, had tried not to think of what had happened to you any more often than you were required to - but that was much easier said than done. Though you knew that you wouldn’t be watching or listening to all of the files that day, what little you’d be faced with wasn’t going to be easy. “I remember everything, remember what it felt like, but hearing it is-”

 “I’m right here.” He wrapped his fingers around the back of your neck, squeezing. “Right here with you. He can’t hurt you again - he won’t, and it’s just… it’s just videos, just sounds.” You nodded. “The worst part’s already happened, this is just memories.” Yeah, but… “You know what I was gonna use as proof, what I found?” You inhaled sharply, eyes widening. No, you never told me. “When… when I stabbed Dolores and she ran off from that Confederado camp, William and I got drunk together after it happened.” He paused. “At least I thought we did. He didn’t drink much of anything, and I drank so much I passed out. He killed everyone in the camp - all the Hosts, all the animals except the horses we ended up riding out on, and he was smart, because when he killed those Hosts, he did it while they were sleepin’, so they didn’t pick up anything. Their eyes never opened, and he was quiet about it, so… The last thing that any of ‘em saw was the two of us together havin’ a good time. I told him we were gonna be brothers, and that I was excited.” Logan looked down, and you saw his lips moving wordlessly for a few seconds. “And I was, because I thought that we… that we bonded. I didn’t like him much, but I thought that it would be alright, since there was nothing I could do about him.” When he looked up at you, you saw a haunted look in his eyes. And you wanted that because of Juliet, I get it, Logan.

 “Logan, you -” You reached over, Logan leaning into your touch as you pressed your fingers to his cheek. “You don’t -”

 “No, I do. Because you need to know why this is…” He swore, and you felt his thumb moving at the base of your skull, sweeping slowly over the hair there. “There was nothin’, and he was careful - like he was with you to pick a place to take me where there’d be no one, where we’d… he was lookin’ for Dolores, but I think he knew we weren’t gonna find her, and so his plan changed.” Logan laughed. “It took me two years to find it, but I… I finally found myself on one of the Host logs - hands tied, walking behind a horse, no shirt, dried blood on my cheek. It doesn’t even look like me.” He shuddered, licking his lips. “Fifteen seconds - you see me and you see the horse, and it’s the damn horse that he went back to Sweetwater on, I was able to find that easily, and all you hear is “I need your horse”, and it’s him - his voice - but you don’t see him.” Logan’s voice picked up speed as he told you the story, and you felt him tense beneath your touch. “And then the view changes as the Host gets pulled off the horse, or falls, or… I don’t remember what happened to him, because I was already out of it, but you see my face, and I just look…”

 “Defeated?” You knew that it was the case, because it’s what you saw then, years later, even in the safety of his car. “Like you knew that whatever happened next wasn’t going to -”

 “Yeah.” Logan cleared his throat and his eyes seemed to focus, too, back on your face. “And it wasn’t much, but it was somethin’, and I found it, and made a copy of that fifteen seconds, and was gonna use that with what I said right after I got pulled back into the Mesa, and with what I told everyone and…” He shook his head. “But it wouldn’t have been enough, not enough to punish him. Not enough to make him leave Delos or to… to prove to Juliet that he’d done it like I said. Not without more, but I had those fifteen seconds, and thought… it would be a good start, that maybe someone would believe me, even just...” Logan’s eyes were wet when they met yours. “I live with it every day, but even with that? It would have all come back up, come back out, and nothin’ would have changed. But I’m goin’ in there with you, and I’m gonna watch and listen to whatever they have, and I’m gonna be sittin’ right there, holding your hand, because this is enough. Not for what he did to me, but for what he did to you. I wish it hadn’t come to this, but at least… at least he’s going to …”

 “Everyone’s going to know what he did to you, Logan. To you, to me, to… them, to Juliet. He doesn’t get to hide anymore.” You understood what he was saying and why he was saying it. You understood that while it would have sounded insensitive to other people - him saying that the proof existed and that he was thankful for it - you didn’t hear it that way. It shouldn’t have come to this. But it did. “This is as much about me as it -”

 “No.” He shook his head firmly, back to business. “No, it can’t be. This is all about you, what he did to you.” What? 

 “But -” Logan stopped you, squeezing his eyes closed and pulling his hand away from your skin. 

 “We’ll talk about it in the office, but this isn’t… we’ll have to talk about me and why he says he did this to you, but the focus has to stay on you. He’s not defending himself against me, or what he did to me, this trial, this… this is your story. I’m just here for support.” You were quiet for a long while, eyes moving away from his face and to the windshield. That’s what he thinks, but it’s not true, this is about him too, it… it has to be. They have to… Logan said your name again, and you looked back at him, not knowing what to expect. “He started the clock when he dragged me out into that desert, but he ran out of time the minute he put his goddamn hands on you.” 

 --- 

 In the safety of one of the conference rooms, you and Logan sat with your lawyers as well as one half of William’s legal team. Logan held your hand tightly beneath the smooth wooden table, but all of you were silent, waiting. “Are they on their way, or -” One of your lawyers - Wakeman - leaned forward, raising one eyebrow.

 “You’ve been getting the same updates as I have, Randall, the security detail is meant to preserve the chain of evidence so that there’s no chance of a mistrial, I’m sure that you and your client will appreciate that.” Wakeman leaned back, gesturing to you and Logan. “Your client has already accused these two of manipulating their stories, so we needed to be sure that there was no question that the information we’re getting is legitimate and untampered with.” He took a deep breath. “The plane carrying the cargo landed an hour ago, they’ll be here soon.” The room went quiet again, and you leaned back in your chair, Logan’s fingers tightening around yours. Great. 

 The cargo that Wakeman was referring to was Tanner, the host that had taken you from Lost Spring, the one that had been your companion the entire time you’d been with William. He’d been secluded since the day that the recovery team had pulled the four of you off of the beach, and since technically, he’d been a witness to “alleged” crimes, they hadn’t cleared him to go back into the park - instead, keeping him powered down and under guard until he was needed. There was a lot more to it - your lawyers and William’s had come to an agreement that they’d both liked about the way that the Host and its information would be treated, ensuring that both teams got it at the same time, not giving anyone an advantage. But because of the nature of the crimes that you were accusing William of, your team had won out, William not being physically permitted into the conference room with you as the information was presented for the first time. 

 Instead, he was in the one next to you with his other lawyer and a police officer, since he hadn’t been cleared for bail. Knowing that he was so close was making your skin crawl, but you knew that Logan was suffering just as much, that he was just as aware of the man’s presence. “You alright, Logan?” He nodded, turning his head to face you, the conversation between the others fading. “He’s going to -”

 “It.” Logan managed a smile then - a weak one, but still a smile. “It’s gonna come in here, and tell us what we need it to, and then we can go.” He’s right. It’s just a Host. You let out a breath, feeling that it was only slightly shaky, and then glanced downward. You were dressed comfortably, but still looked more put together than you had been in weeks; hair brushed, makeup applied, wearing a short sleeved dress that reached your knees. You felt more like you - and looked more like yourself, too. This whole thing’s being recorded, so of course it… The door opened and your head shot up, Logan’s grip on you tightening. Here we go. 

 Tanner walked into the room first, followed by a man and a woman. Though your heart rate increased, you were able to look at Tanner’s face without hesitation, gasping as you saw that they hadn’t repaired him after William’s gunshot, though they’d cleaned the blood from his skin. “Holy shit.” Logan spoke from next to you, but you barely heard it, focused on the man - Host - in front of you. 

 “That’s good right there, Tanner.” The man that had entered with him spoke, and you noticed that he had one of his hands on the butt of his gun, eyes trained on the Host. “These people have some questions for you.” He stepped back as Tanner nodded, the Host’s eyes moving around the room but not stopping on anyone. “Hughes?” It was the woman’s turn to speak up, pulling a tablet out of her pocket as she slid into one of the open seats at the table. 

 “Alright, first of all.” She tapped a few times on the screen. “I’m one of the Mesa behavior techs, Elsie, and I’m the only one that’s had access to Tanner’s logs since the day we pulled him off the beach.” She was still tapping. “We didn’t make repairs - of course we will before he takes the stand, but we were told by QA that he needed to go into isolation until he was necessary. We did make a backup of the entire time period in question - from when William first encountered Tanner and his buddy to when you were in the park, but because he and his friend were hiding out for most of it, it’s pretty boring.” She was staring down at the screen as she talked, her brown hair pulled into a low ponytail. “Stubbs here has been guarding him for the entire trip from the Mesa. but the whole thing’s been recorded, so I’m sure you already know that.” She finished what she was doing, looking up from the tablet and at each person in turn, her eyes finally resting on you. “I’m going to wake him up now, so he’s going to be the way he was the last time you saw him.” She swallowed, waiting. “This isn’t supposed to be any more difficult for you than it ha -”

 “He’s just a Host.” You spoke without waiting, using the hand that Logan wasn’t holding to gesture at Tanner. “He didn’t really hurt me, he just did what he was told.” Everyone was silent, and though you hated yourself for doing it, your eyes darted over to the screen that was displaying William’s room, seeing the man sitting in his chair, a bored expression on his face. “Seeing and hearing him won’t be the hard part, it’s going to be what… what he recorded that’s…” Hughes nodded. “I’m ok. Let’s get this over with.” 

 There was another pause where no one in the room spoke, and then Elsie’s voice reached your ears. “Alright, Tanner. Bring yourself back online.” 

 --- 

 He watched, silently as the Host woke  up, the man’s eyes focusing, first on Elsie and then swinging to you. “You’re alive. You made it.” He heard you inhale, and Logan shifted closer to you in his seat, feeling you lean into him. “Thought the Boss would’ve -”

 “Tanner.” Elsie spoke again, drawing the Host’s attention. “I need you to focus on me. Lose all emotional affect.” He did, and Logan felt you relax slightly. This fucking sucks. “Do you recognize anyone in this room?” 

 “Yeah, that lady right there’s the one me an’ O’conner took from Lost Spring, and the man nexta her is the one that she said would come for her.” Elsie nodded.

 “Ok, Tanner, and why did you take her?” The Host took a breath, pausing for a second and then reached up, scratching at the side of his head, fingers passing right over the carnage from the gunshot as if he didn’t feel it. He probably doesn’t. “Tanner?”

 “Boss told us to. Told us he’d treat us nice, make us rich if we kidnapped her and brought her to ‘em.” Logan’s blood went cold, and he looked at the screen, wanting to see what William’s reaction was - but there wasn’t one, the man’s face passive, blue eyes staring blankly ahead. 

 “Who’s your boss, Tanner?” Elsie was looking between the tablet and the Host, lip caught between her teeth. “Is he -”

 “He’s not in here.” Tanner looked around, eyes moving right past the TV screen. Shit, he won’t be able to see it, he won’t - Elsie seemed to have same reaction, looking at the lawyers with a frustrated expression before she spoke again. 

 “We program them to not see things that will upset them, which includes technology. So he can’t...he sees the screen, but can’t process it. He’d have to physically see a person in order to… she trailed off, clearly knowing what she wanted to do, but not wanting to seem as if she was steering the Host by naming anyone. William would have to be in this room for Tanner to identify him. “Did he ever tell you his name, Tanner?” The Host shook its head, then spoke. 

 “No, he just showed up one night a couple months ago, told us he thought we could use some help robbin’ the Abernathy’s farm, and then when we’d done that, he said he had a deal for us, one that we wouldn’t be able to pass up.” Logan was gritting his teeth, his anger growing by the second. “Course he killed O’Conner real quick to prove a point, right after he put her to sleep, an’ that’s when I started thinkin’ that he was lyin’.” He sure fucking was. 

 “Do you remember what he looked like, Tanner?” Elsie was staring at the screen again, frowning. “Anything at all about your boss?” The Host paused, thinking. 

 “Wore a white hat. Blue eyes, yellow hair. He -”

 “Freeze all motor functions.” Logan stood suddenly, surprising everyone in the room - even himself, as Tanner froze, expression going blank. What are you doing, Delos? “Look, we all know why we’re here. He can identify William if he sees him. We need to take Tanner into the other room, or bring William into the hallway, or -” 

 “Bring him in here.” You spoke up and Logan looked down, seeing that you were staring up at him, terror in your eyes. “It’ll only be for a few seconds, he can stay by the door, he…” No. No, that’s not happening, that’s not… “Tanner can identify him, and the lawyers will see, and…” You smiled sadly at Logan. “This wasn’t ever gonna be easy, Logan. I’ll have to see him in the courtroom, and here, at least… at least this is worth it.” He stared down at you, watching as you gripped the arms of the chair you sat in. “I know what he did to me, and he needs to… I can’t be afraid.” She’s so much stronger than I was. She’s … He nodded as he sat back down, everyone else still quiet. Wakeman sighed, telling Randall that he could go and get his client - even though you knew that William and the other lawyer had heard everything. “Wake him up before W… William gets here, that way it’ll be a natural reaction.” Randall disappeared out the door, and as soon as he was gone, all eyes on the room focused on you, but no one spoke. “What?” 

 “Nothing.” Elsie looked away first, letting out a deep breath. “Bring yourself back online, Tanner.” The Host came back to life, continuing the sentence. 

 “ - just looked like a regular guy, like another Newcomer, and…” Tanner blinked. “We didn’t know he was gonna hurt you like that, ma’am, just thought he -”

 “It’s ok, Tanner.” Lips parted, Logan turned to face you, watching as you smiled at the Host. “You just did what you were made to do, you…” He watched you swallow. “You didn’t know any 

better, and you couldn’t say no.” There was a pause in the conversation, and Logan’s eyes moved back to the screen, where William’s chair sat vacant. Shit, he’s coming. He hadn’t seen the other man since the beach either - and for good reason. If he had, Logan would have throttled him, effectively ruining your chances to win your case, and landing himself in jail. It’s not fucking fair, it… The door creaked open, and everyone’s attention went to it, Logan catching you sitting up straighter in your chair, but otherwise not saying anything. Shit. “Logan.” You spoke quietly - only for him to hear - as footsteps continued, Randall reappearing first, followed by William’s other lawyer and then the man himself, hair hanging limply next to his face, cheeks slightly sunken in. You look like shit, Billy. Exactly what you deserve. Logan held your hand tightly, thumb sliding over the skin slowly, but he knew that it wasn’t enough. Just do it quickly, Tanner. Please. 

 Tanner’s attention was drawn to the doorway, and then the man pointed, lip curling. “Boss, you… why’d you…” William’s eyes passed over the Host entirely, and in half a heartbeat, Logan knew that he’d be looking for you. He fought the urge to stand and shield you with his body, knowing that you needed to face William on your own, but he felt his heart lurch as he watched William’s gaze finally reach you, noting that your posture didn’t change - though the grip on his hand beneath the table did. “You said we’d be rich if we helped you with her, Boss, but O’Conner’s dead and you… you shot me…” Tanner’s hand rose to the side of his head, but Logan wasn’t paying attention, watching only as William stared at you, a satisfied smirk on his face, life back in his eyes. She’s doing fine, asshole. Rather than answering the Host, William cleared his throat, saying your name. 

 “Glad to see you’re doing well.” Don’t speak to her. He raised an eyebrow. “Last time I saw you, you were face down in the ocean, with a knife in -” You recoiled from the man’s words, and Logan growled under his breath, ready to jump into action when Wakeman sighed, raising his hand. 

 “Stop. Randall, please tell your client not to directly address mine. That’s not why he’s in here.” His heart was pounding, but Logan was thankful for the interruption. How dare he. “Ms. Hughes, please… back to the reason we’re….” William continued to stare at you as Elsie questioned Tanner, the host identifying William as his boss, talking about how the man had promised them wealth for a couple hours of time and a “simple” abduction, and finally, after what felt like hours - but was really only a few minutes - the police officer led William out of the room and back down the hall, the second lawyer following close behind. Finally. You relaxed immediately, but Logan knew how difficult it had been for you to even see the other man, let alone hear him say your name. He’s going to fucking pay for this. Seething in his chair, Logan reminded himself that he needed to calm down, that the meeting wasn’t over. 

 “Stubbs here is going to remove the pearl from Tanner’s head now that we know some basics.” Elsie was tapping on the screen again, and everyone watched as Tanner sat in a chair, tilting his head back. “We’re going to connect it to the tablet, and then we can broadcast the video onto the projector so that everyone can see it.” As she spoke, Stubbs stepped forward, pulling out a set of tools, and started to cut into the Host’s scalp. I’ve never seen this done before, all I’ve seen is the data. He was interested, but still focused on you next to him, and he noticed that while the lawyers all stayed put, you leaned in, too, eyes on Tanner and Stubbs. “This will also allow us to go to specific memories and dates, which we have based on the list provided by both legal teams.” She gestured to a few pieces of paper next to her. “We’re not going to watch everything today, that would take days, but once we’ve verified things to your liking, and you’ve both been given the data, you’ll have a chance to go through and pick out relevant points.” She pushed a pair of glasses up on her nose, glancing over at you. Logan caught the sympathy in her eyes, offering her a small nod and a quick smile, but the woman quickly returned to her work, reaching for the white device that Stubbs handed her after wiping it off on a towel. “Alright, here we go.” 

 --- 

 By the time you and Logan were out of the meeting room 90 minutes later, you were unable to speak. That was worse than I thought. You glanced over at Logan, ready to speak to him, but chose not to when you saw the set of his jaw and the look in his eyes. He hasn’t said a word since he said goodbye to the lawyers. The two of you were walking on the path behind the offices, a short one that led through a small expanse of trees, but Logan wasn’t touching you, he was simply walking next to you, eyes focused on the path ahead of him. You’d followed him out the doors, thinking that you’d be going straight back to the car, but Logan’s detour took you by surprise, even though he was uncharacteristically silent. What did I do? 

 The beginning videos from Tanner’s memories had simply been of the man and O’Conner and William talking about the horses, as well as actually going to the Abernathy farm. You’d watched through Tanner’s eyes as they’d broken into the barn, choosing horses to lead from their stalls and stash in the field behind, it, watched as they made their way into the farmhouse, attacking the family, William standing by and watching but not doing anything to stop it - until Dolores came down the stairs, long blue skirt swirling around her legs. Then he acted, rushing toward the woman, the two of them disappearing up the stairs despite her protests. From there, the two had simply laid low in the hills, selling the horses and waiting for William - until he’d shown up on the day you’d arrived in the park with him, cutting out from Lost Spring to find the men and go over the final plan. You’d watched and listened as you’d been abducted, heard parts of the conversations that you’d had with Tanner on your way to William, seen him pull you off the horse for the first time. Watching yourself struggle against the man as he’d chloroformed you was uncomfortable, but you handled it better than Logan did, feeling the man pull away from you as the images played out on the screen. 

 You saw yourself through Tanner’s eyes in backward glances over his shoulder at you as you rode behind William’s horse, watched as he tied you to the tree. He watched me after William did that, you realized, eyes moving back to Logan. He was a Host, but he still… is it because I was a guest? Logan audibly reacted when William slapped you the first time, the man’s name leaving his lips in a hiss, but it wasn’t until Tanner turned his head to watch as you were dragged behind your horse when you fell, your cries sounding foreign to your ears that he reached for you again, head turned away from the screen to look at you, eyes filled with tears. He stared at you without speaking until you stared screaming at William on the screen, Logan looking back in time to see William punch you in the stomach, your hand moving to the area as if you could feel it again, Logan’s grip tightening. 

 But as you watched Logan walking toward you on the sand from Tanner’s point of view, it was too much, and you pulled your hand from Logan’s, standing. “Stop.” Elsie pressed pause as you spoke, everyone’s eyes on you. “That’s enough for today. Enough for… you know it’s me, I’m telling you that’s me. It lines up with what I already told you. It’s clearly William on there, and… please. Let them make you copies of the files and then go over them to get what you need, but I can’t… I can’t watch this right now, I -” 

 “You heard her.” Logan stood too, his hand settling at the center of your back. “That’s enough for today.” He took a breath. “Ms. Hughes, please make sure that both legal teams get these files.” He looked at Randall. “You’ll understand why we can’t give you the proprietary data for the Hosts to take with you, but if you and your team need to see the coding or to verify it, our Los Angeles facility is capable of reading the data and printing the Hosts, so you can schedule an appointment to met with one of the techs there, and they’ll be able to answer your questions.” He looked back at you, taking your hand. “We’re leaving.” 

 And so you’d followed him out the door of the room,his hand pulled from yours as you walked down the hallway, and then out the front door of the building, Logan’s long strides taking you around it and to the back - and the path - that you were currently on. After a few more minutes of walking, you finally couldn’t take it any longer, reaching out for Logan’s elbow and closing your fingers around it. “Logan, stop.” He took two more steps before he listened to you, halting in his tracks but keeping his back to you. “Please talk to me, I don’t understand why you’re…” He turned slowly to face you and you froze, mouth dropping open. Oh, Logan. 

 “Do you know how hard that was for me to watch?” Yes, that’s why I didn’t want you to come. His eyes were wide and full of tears - much like they’d been in the office. “To see all those things happen to you because of… because of me?” He tapped on his chest with his fingertips, head moving quickly from side to side. “And we didn’t even watch all of the … all of what he did to you.” No, you didn’t see everything, Logan, and you won’t, because there were things Tanner wasn’t there for, there were… “He tortured you to try to get you to turn on me, to tell him… what you knew about me and what I was doing, to... “ Logan’s head whipped back and forth and he stepped closer to you, reaching out to finally touch your face, barely, before he dropped his hand again. “Everything that happened to you happened to you because of me, and I had to watch that, and I had to hear it and I had to… fuck.” Logan raked his fingers through his hair, lip curling. “And then I made it worse when I pushed you, after you spent days tryin’ to protect me -” You had to, you had to get me away from him. 

 “And I’d do it again, Logan.” You stepped closer, not daring to reach out yet. “Why would I have told him anything?” You were starting to worry, since Logan’s reaction wasn’t at all what you’d expected - anger, maybe, frustration, sadness, but instead he seemed disappointed, as if you’d done something wrong by protecting him in a way that no one else ever had. “He didn’t -”

 “He would have let you bleed out on that beach. He wouldn’t have given you water or food or… or let you rest until you told him what he wanted to hear, and then he would have…” Logan swallowed, rubbing his hand over his face. “I knew how badly you were hurt, I saw the X-rays, saw the charts… but why didn’t you tell me what he did to you, how bad it was, how much…” Logan’s fingers stretched out and you looked down, watching them tremble as they touched your stomach, sliding over to your ribs, his other hand resting on the shoulder that had been dislocated. “… He made me walk behind a horse and then left me in the desert, he… you… how did you keep going? How did you get up? How did you…” Logan hung his head, his shoulders shaking. Stop it, Logan. Come on, this isn’t fair. “Why would you do it?” 

 “Because he doesn’t get to win, Logan, I already told you that. He doesn’t get to do this.” You cupped his jaw in both hands, forcing him to look at you. “I did it because it’s what you did, but the difference? The difference was that I knew you were coming, and so even if…” You took a deep breath, steadying yourself. He needs to hear it. “Even if it was too late to get me out of the park? You would have been there for the end, and made sure that he … that what he did to me didn’t just…”

 “What are you saying?” He sounded more like Logan, but you didn’t like the worry in his voice. “In the end, what -”

 “You know what I’m saying, Logan.” Still cradling his face, you met his eyes and tried to smile. “I knew you’d come for me, and I’d never… I’d never think otherwise, but it was close. I was so tired, Logan, I barely knew what was going on when he…” His hand moved back to your stomach and you nodded. “All I thought about was how when you found me, when you found the Hosts, watched their files… you’d see that I never gave up on you, I never let him.... Never gave him the satisfaction of me turning on you like Juliet did, like your dad did.” He said your name but you cut him off, feeling the words pouring out of you before you could stop them. “He took me because I was there, Logan, it was always about you, and I was just a stand-in, because he knew he’d never get to you again, not like he did that first time. The only thing that mattered to me was giving you something to go on, something to get him with… so I took it. I answered his questions and I let him do all of those things to me, and I stood up for myself and for you, knowing it was going to make him mad, because… the angrier he got, the more he talked. And the more he talked, the -”

 “The more he told you. The more he said about what he did, the more he… Jesus.” Logan’s hands left your body, arms circling around your upper half and pulling you into his chest, still careful of your ribs and elbow, but less careful than he had been. Finally. He buried his nose in your hair and you heard him whispering that he was sorry, that he’d make it up to you, that you were a genius, and finally you laughed - a clear, ringing sound that surprised you, but surprised Logan more, the man pulling back from you and staring down, the disappointment in his eyes replaced with something else. That’s what I want to see. Always. “I don’t deserve you.” He narrowed his eyes, focused on yours. “I know people say that all the time, but I… I was an asshole, I was a junkie, I let myself be -”

 “You were Logan, you’re not anymore.” You raised one eyebrow, deciding to press your luck. “I mean you can be kind of an asshole sometimes, but…” He laughed then, loosening his hold on you, and when you tilted your head up even further, rising onto your toes to kiss him, you felt yourself relax. Finally. But... “The rest of those Host logs are worse, Logan. You’re not going to like what…”

 “I know. But like you just told me, it’s… it’s better that we have ‘em, that he…” Logan closed his eyes. “That he was enough of a dick that he thought it wouldn’t…” You hugged Logan again, still trying to slow your heartbeat, and after a few long moments, he spoke. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t… that I pulled back from you in that conference room today.” Why are you apologizing? “Those videos started playing, and I just… it was worse than I expected, I …” He wrinkled his nose. “I started thinking about what he did to me and how…” 

 “It’s fine, Logan. You… You were there. Just because you let go of my hand for a minute doesn’t mean that…” You started walking again, taking his hand, but you’d turned back toward the parking lot. “I expected it, actually. That you’d… take this hard, because you know what it feels like to go through those things, and that’s why I didn’t want you to see it until we were in the courtroom.” It would have been an ambush, but you’d weighed your options, knowing that you at least needed to try to convince Logan not to go to the meeting with you, though you knew he’d never agree. “This is still new for you - caring about someone s-” You cut yourself off, quickening your steps. Shut up. 

 “Nah.” He pulled on your hand, stopping you. “Mighta only told you a couple weeks ago, but this isn’t new. Not with you.” Your heartbeat sped up again, mind flashing back to the dream you’d had the previous night, the way he’d looked at you. “And I am sorry. I know you understand, but that doesn’t mean I should have done it.” Accept his apology and move on. Don’t let him dwell on this. 

 “How long will it take them to go through all of that, Logan?” You changed the subject, eyes focused on the ground in front of you. “Do we have -”

 “When I was lookin’ through the files, it took me a long time.” You could see the parking lot, your eyes landing on Logan’s car. “Probably the rest of this week at least, they might have some questions, but… this shouldn’t be that difficult for them to put together, especially since it’s not just audio. They have Tanner, they’ve got you to take the stand, they’ve got me, and they’ve got…him to make a fool of himself when he tries to lie his way out of it… Trial’s startin’ at the end of next week, so we can’t put it off forever, but…” He stopped, the two of you having reached the edge of the asphalt. “But we can have a good week before all the bullshit starts.” You hoped he was right, hoped that at least for a few days, things could go back to normal for the two of you before everything kicked off. The sooner it starts, the sooner it’s over. 

 “You know what would be good, Delos?” You looked over the top of his car at him, trying not to grin. “Making that dream a -”

 “No.” He winked at you, tapping his hand on the top of the vehicle. “I mean yes, but no. Not yet, Not until you see the doctor again. Broken ribs are a bitch, and you’re so close.” I know Logan, but that doesn’t make it… “Get in. Let’s go home.” Home? His house? He must have seen the confusion on your face because Logan laughed again, stepping back and opening the door before he spoke again. “You heard me.” 

--- 

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[something-tofightfor]

Ransom - three

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (Ink AU)

Word Count: 7662

Rating: NSFW (Talk of kidnapping, actual kidnapping, language, violence, physical abuse of a female, death)

Trigger Warnings: Kidnapping, physical abuse, violence

Author’s Note: William is a piece of shit, but I still enjoyed writing this. 

Summary: It’s a race against time for Logan to get across the park and to you, but what condition will he find you in? 

After walking away from you and leaving the spilled alcohol to dry on your already dehydrated skin, William and Tanner cleaned up the camp, putting out the fire and packing things onto the horses. He’s going to kill Tanner too, he won’t want a Host… But the more you thought about it, the more you realized that William would likely keep Tanner alive to act as a buffer between him and Logan when Logan found you. What does he want? The few hours of sleep that you’d gotten hadn’t helped much, and so when William untied you, giving you a few minutes to stretch your arms out before he retied your wrists together in front of you, you felt dead on your feet, already exhausted. Why does my arm hurt so much?

 But William didn’t let you climb back onto your horse, instead looping the rope that tied you around his arm before he climbed up onto his, glancing down at you. “You’re gonna walk today.” What? No, I can’t. “And then maybe when we stop to rest the horses, you’ll feel a little more like talkin’.” He’s crazy, I can’t… 

 But you did - stumbling behind the horse for hours, the sun beating down on your shoulders and causing your skin to tighten. Focused only on staying upright - the few times you’d fallen to your knees, William had allowed you to be dragged until you’d regained your footing - you stared down at the ground in front of you, hopelessness growing by the second. Logan’s going to kill him. When he finds us, he’s going to… Logan’s face flashed in your mind, the way his eyes looked when he smiled at you, the way his hair flopped over his eye, the way his lips moved when he talked, but with every step you took away from Logan, the more desperate you became. 

 When William finally whistled for the horses to stop, the sun was high in the sky and you were covered in sweat, your hair only half contained with the rubber strap you’d used to secure the ends of it, the rest of it sticking to your skin. It was cloudless, as most days in Westworld tended to be, and you could feel your skin blistering, knew that they were likely large, but as you dropped to the sandy ground, you thought only of your tattoos - of what they’d look like when and if you ever healed. Shit. You slumped forward, forcing your eyes open, and when you looked down, you saw that the skin of your wrists beneath the rope was red and chafed and one knee of your pants had torn, blood seeping through and soaking the material. Ow. When did that happen? You drew in a deep breath, flexing your arms, and as you looked at the skin there, realized that those were bleeding, too, along with a deep, lingering pain in your elbow. I’m a mess. You laughed at the thought, wondering what Logan would think of you when he saw you again. He’s going to hate it, he’s going to be disgusted, he… 

 “Get up.” Still laughing, you looked up at William, who was standing in front of you with his arms crossed. “I said get up.” You tried to get to your feet but struggled, and wondered if the knock to the head and the whiskey had anything to do with it. Logan was out here for days and he was fine, it’s barely been a day and a half and I’m… You shook your head slowly. Focus. It doesn’t matter what he did, or what happened or - “Jesus.” You felt yourself being lifted to your feet, William pulling you up by the thick cords around your wrists and a low whine leaving your lips. “I said fucking stand, even Logan was better than you are, and that prick -”

 “Don’t you fucking talk about him.” Your tone even and strong for the first time in hours, you stared William in the eye. “You tried to kill him.” The words slipped out before you could stop them, and though William’s face didn’t betray him, his eyes did. “You wanted Delos. You -”

 “You think you’re so fucking smart, hmm?” William stepped closer, and you saw the dirt on his cheek, saw the small scar next to his eye. “Figured it all out?” He shook his head. “You have no idea… but you’re right, so maybe you do have some idea.” He took a deep breath, collecting himself. “Did he tell you why? What he did to me?” He told me everything you piece of fucking shit.

 “William, he didn’t tell me anything, I don’t know how many times I -” You were cut off again, this time not by his hand against your face, but instead by his closed fist slamming into your stomach, doubling you over as pain bloomed through your torso. Jesus Christ. “Can you please just...Fuck.” You coughed hard, bracing your forearms against your thighs. “How am I supposed to answer your questions if you won’t let me talk?” 

 “You’re talking, but you aren’t saying anything to me.” He stepped closer to you, reaching out to grasp your jaw, yanking your face up so hard you felt your neck crack. “Did Logan tell you about Dolores?” You thought back to the way that he’d reacted to the Host when he saw her on the yacht, the way he’d gotten angry at William immediately, the way it all made sense once Logan had explained. “I’ll tell you about Dolores and what good old Logan did to us.” Oh, great. But can I sit own, William? Instead of letting you do so right there, he dropped his hand from your jaw, picking up the rope again and leading you to the shade of a tree. “Sit down. This is a long story, and I don’t want you to keel over before I’m done with it.” 

 He waited until you’d settled against the ground, choosing a small patch of grass and running your fingers over it slowly, savoring the feel of it. “W-”

 “No. You listen now.” He cleared his throat, saying your name. “If you fall asleep, I will find ways to wake you up. The guns won’t kill you, but they hurt like hell when you get shot. Especially in the hands and feet.” You bit your lip before you could blurt out the fact that if he shot you in the foot, you wouldn’t be able to walk and he’d have to let you back on the horse. Don’t antagonize him. “I came here for the first time when Jules and I were engaged, and wasn’t planning on taking part in any of the shit Logan loves about Westworld - none of the sex, none of the murder none of the… I just wanted to have a good time… and then I met Dolores.” 

 William talked for nearly an hour, recounting the story of meeting Dolores and then the girl stumbling onto the campsite with him and Logan, the trip to Pariah and the double cross, the few days that they’d been separated when he’d known that Dolores had woken up, that she was feeling things - real things. Despite the fact that you didn’t want to listen to him because you could barely keep your eyes open and you hated the sound of his voice, you found yourself interested in the story, though his side of it seemed nuts. He thought that Dolores was real, thought that she was as in love with him as he was with her after only a few days, thought that something could come of it after leaving the park. “William.” You interrupted, surprising even yourself. “You’re telling me that these things… feel? That they …” He watched you, almost as if he was trying to figure out if you were teasing him, but then answered you with a surprising softness in his tone, his eyes focused on the sand. 

 “Yes. Not all of them, but at least her.” He swallowed and you widened your eyes. He believes it, still. “She said things that… none of the other Hosts did, they were just things, dolls, as Logan put it, but Dolores? That trip? She was something else.” 

 “But you came home. You… you married Juliet, got her… you had Emily, and you’re, it’s been… you’ve come here.” You winced with every word and realized that your lips were cracked and dry, your tongue moving over them by force of habit. “So many times, William, you come here more than L-” You stopped yourself, not wanting to say his name out loud because you didn’t want to think of Logan, off somewhere worrying about you. “Does she remember you? Does she-” He grabbed both of your shoulders again, pushing you backwards, and then William was on top of you, kneeling over your body and holding you to the ground. You cried out, feeling the grass against your skin, the pain of his grip slightly offset by the cool blades beneath you, but William didn’t give you long to think, his tone angry again as he ground your shoulders and back against the earth, one hand letting go to yank your head to the side by your hair. “William, stop.”

 “No.” He leaned down, face only a few inches from yours. “She doesn’t remember, not after… not after that trip.” He took a deep breath and then laughed, his finger trailing over your shoulder again, passing over your exposed collarbone and then up your neck before he tapped on your chin. “Not after what he did to her.” He stabbed her, he said he cut her open. He sighed and settled his weight against you, both hands moving to your throat. “But he’ll remember. He’ll remember you.” 

 --- 

 He woke up just as the sun was setting, sitting straight up and immediately reaching for the pouch of supplies, his heart racing. I didn’t mean to sleep for that long, I… He unlocked the device, searching for Tanner’s dot, and was pleased to see that it was still only about as far ahead of him as it had been previously, even though it was moving. When he woke up, Logan wasn’t quite well rested but he was better, and though he still had hours to go before he even got close to you, he was determined not to waste any more time. He’d ridden quickly out of Las Mudas, knowing that he needed to cover as much ground as he could before the shot wore off, and he’d managed a few hours of breakneck speed before he felt himself slumping in the saddle, slowing the horse down to a trot and then to a halt, tying it to a small tree before he collapsed on the ground, fingers closed around the edge of your hat’s brim. I’m coming, I just need… 

 He took a long drink out of the canteen before he refilled it from the river, whistling for his horse and then climbing on, the heels of his boots urging it to go, even though he could tell it didn’t want to. I know, buddy, but we’ve gotta. As he covered the ground and the shadows deepened, bringing with them cooler temperatures, Logan worried about you. Thirty six hours had passed, and if the weather he’d experienced had been any indication, you’d been in the sun for most of it, sweltering in the daylight and then freezing at night. I hope he’s letting her sleep by the fire. When Logan had been William’s prisoner, following him across the park looking for Dolores, he’d made the man walk for the majority of the time, trying to stay on his feet behind the horse he was tied to, but William hadn’t let him near the fire at night, and Logan’s recollection of those nights was misery, especially the more sunburned he’d gotten. He won’t do that to her, there’s no way. While Logan didn’t remember everything about the last day of his time with William, he remembered the pain he’d been in, every step agony, every muscle in his body aching, and the thought of you in even a fraction of that pain was enough to make his blood boil. 

 He checked his progress with Tanner’s position as the night wore on, but the Host kept moving, which meant you did, too. Though Logan wasn’t hungry, he ate some of the food he’d packed from Las Mudas - bread and jerky - and it kept him awake, allowed him to focus on what he’d do when he finally found you. He’s going to wish he’d never met any of us. He reached the plantation at dawn, watching as Tanner’s dot paused on the map, the bright point of light seeming to mock him. He’d closed the distance to about half - roughly a few hours between the two of you, and though Logan wanted nothing more than to keep going, he knew he had to rest again, otherwise he’d be no good to you when he caught up. Unless William just left Tanner, they’re stopped too. This means … Logan typed your name into the tablet again, waiting for your picture and profile to come up, your smile staring up at him from the translucent screen. I’m coming. 

 He wound his watch, giving himself three and a half hours, and though he thought he’d have a difficult time sleeping, Logan passed out quickly, his body bordering on exhaustion, even on the hard ground. When the watch dinged, Logan sat straight up, his eyes moving over the agave plants and the smaller aloe ones near the edges of the field. Get up, Delos. No more sitting still. Thinking quickly, Logan stooped down, breaking some of the aloe leaves off and wrapping them in a handkerchief before smearing some on his nose and climbing back onto the horse. It’s not much but it’s something. She might need it. You’d officially been gone for more than two days, and Logan knew that every minute counted. You were moving again, and Logan was surprised to see that your progress had quickened, Tanner’s location only a few miles away from the edge of the land - and the beginning of the sea, something that Logan hadn’t ever seen himself. Nowhere else for you to go, William. 

 He passed though the remainder of the plantation and entered the sand dunes, pulling his bandana up and over his mouth and nose, lowering the brim of his hat to block the sand and sun, and pressed on, thinking only of how, when he found you, he was going to get you back from William, away from Tanner, and to safety. He’d already decided that as soon as he made his move, he was going to press the button on his hat; the security team would see that there were three high-value Guests in the same area that needed assistance, and he hoped that in the time it took them to arrive, he would be able to do something to get you back into his arms and to subdue the other man. Shooting him would be great. 

 Logan kept the tablet out and open as he rode, watching as Tanner stopped moving, his own dot approaching the last known location of the Host quickly, Almost there. He had a plan - or at least part of one, and Logan intended to stick to it, drawing William’s attention away from you and onto him, hopefully giving you a chance to escape. He’d shoot the Host as soon as he could, but Logan’s focus needed to be on William, because he was the most dangerous part of the equation - he was the only one that could truly harm you. When the map told Logan that he was only a quarter mile from you, he dismounted, tying the reins to a tree and ensuring that he had everything. Here we go. 

 Against his better judgement, Logan twisted the dial on the injector again to a half dose and pressed the trigger, closing his eyes and waiting until he felt the energy coursing through him. I only need a few minutes. He tucked the device back into the bag and took a deep breath, walking in the direction of Tanner’s dot. I’m here, William. You better not have hurt her. 

--- 

 As soon as Logan spotted you, he gasped out loud, thankful for the sound of the crashing waves that tore the breath from his lips and carried it away. What did he do to her? He could see your sunburn from where he was, the blisters on your shoulders and upper chest prominent. He could also see the blood that had soaked your right knee through the tear in your pants, the streaks of dark reddish brown on your arms. Still cautious, Logan inched forward, gun drawn, and stepped toward where you were standing, the Host’s arm around your neck, holding you upright but otherwise not doing much of anything. He’s just waiting. He wasn’t holding a gun on you, and the closer Logan got, the more he understood why. You could barely stand, and your eyes were half closed - either from exhaustion or pain, he couldn’t tell which. You looked as if you’d lost at least a few pounds and your hair was still loosely held back, though the parts of it that had gotten free were matted and dirty, sticking to your skin. William was facing away from him, staring out over the water with his hands in his pockets, and finally, Logan couldn’t help himself, calling out your name as his heartbeat thundered in his chest. I’m here.

 He watched as your eyes slowly opened, and even though he was still ten yards away, Logan could see how unfocused they were, how cracked your lips were as they tried to form his name. You weren’t tied anymore, and Logan saw the bruises and chafing on your wrists, courtesy of the rope he’d first wrapped around them. She needs a doctor. Logan reached up with one hand, ready to press the button like he’d meant to do, but was stopped by the sound of a cocking gun, audible even over the rushing water. “Don’t touch it. Hat off, Logan.” He froze at the sound of William’s voice, hand only inches from his hat, but his eyes went back to you, seeing that your eyes had fully opened at the feeling of the metal pressed to your temple. You can’t die, it won’t kill you. But he knew that you were too far gone, too exhausted to consider the reality of the situation, and so Logan held his hand up, slowly reaching it back as he looked at William. 

 “I’m gonna take it off, William, that way I can…” William nodded once and Logan reacted, using the back of one hand to knock the hat off his head, not bothering to watch where it landed. It doesn’t matter. I have his tracker in my pocket, I can use that one. “Let her go, William, whatever the problem is, it’s with me. She’s not a part of this.” You cried out as the Host’s hold tightened, his gun still aimed at you. “She’s exhausted, William, at least let her si-” But William had drawn his own gun before Logan could react, turning and firing a single shot, aimed at Tanner’s head. The Host’s grip on you loosened, and at the sudden change, you stumbled forward, arms outstretched to catch yourself, but William didn’t let you fall, the gun dropping from his hand and hitting the sand at your feet, his fingers closing around your upper arm and yanking you against his chest as you screamed in pain. Something’s wrong with her arm. 

 It only took a few seconds, But Logan felt like things were moving in slow motion, watching as William put his hands on you, the hand at your arm replaced with one wrapping around the front of your chest, pressing against your shoulder as he held you in front of him, effectively blocking any shot Logan might have had. “Come and get her, Logan.” William watched him from over your shoulder, and Logan weighed his options. “You wanted me to black hat with you, and now look at you, trying to be a white hat and save her.” Logan watched as William’s free hand fell to his side, the man’s head shaking back and forth. “You couldn’t just let me be happy, could you? Were always so afraid I was gonna take over your fucking company before it was even yours, afraid that I would have better ideas than you. You couldn’t even let me have my vacation without trying to fucking dictate what we did, and then when I started having fun, you took that away from me too.” It’s not real, William. None of it was, but this is. You can … you’re hurting her, just like you hurt me, you… “It would have been so much easier if you had fucking died in that desert, Logan. But you didn’t. I could have gone back and had everything. Juliet, Dolores, Delos… all of it. But now, all I have is your fucking sister, and if you had your way, I wouldn’t even have had her for much longer.” 

 “Do you even care, William?” Logan was looking at William but he was also watching you, saw the way that your arms hung down at your sides, eyes closed again as your head drooped forward, Logan noticing the dark bruising that spread across one cheek. “If you’re still so in love with D-”

 “It’s not about that, you asshole.” William screamed, jerking you sideways as his body moved. “It’s about what you’re taking away from me. Always taking. Then, now. Taking, because you don’t know any better, because you’ve never had to …” William sneered. “What are you working on now, Logan? What evidence are you collecting on me? What is she helping you with?” Helping? Logan’s eyes widened. That’s what this is about, he thinks that I… Jesus, this is my fault. 

 “I told her we got into a mess with the Confederados, William, that you and I had a falling out. I told her that you weren’t happy with how I was playing the game, but that’s... I wanted to protect her until... “ He stepped closer unconsciously and watched as William took a step backwards, the waves crashing only a few feet behind him. “She isn’t a part of this, William, and we won’t say anything if you let her go. Look at her, she can barely stand, William, she’s…” William glanced down at you, and Logan watched as he smiled, nodding. 

 “She said that, too. That you didn’t tell her anything.” He laughed. “I didn’t believe her. I guess I should have.” She lied for me. Logan watched your lips move, though he couldn’t tell what you were saying, and felt his heart pounding. “So what are we going to do about this, Logan?” William raised his gaze, blue eyes full of anger. “What’s your solution?” I want to kill you, that’s what I want to do.

 “What do you want, William?” Logan stepped forward again, and William stepped back, the water lapping at his boots and yours, too. “Money? Dolores? You certainly don’t want Juliet, or -” Cool it, Logan. Don’t push him too hard.

 “I loved your sister.” Logan heard honesty in William’s voice for the first time, watching as the blonde shook his head. “I did, but then…” He looked up, and Logan saw the desperation in his eyes. “You take Delos away from me, Logan, get me fired, put me in jail?” He shook his head. “You take her away, too.” William laughed, but the sound was bitter. “Just like you took her away that first time.” Jesus, William. Dolores?

 “It wouldn’t have mattered, William, we would have left and then she wouldn’t have remembered you the next time we went back. That’s how it is, they aren’t real, Dolores was never… fuck, William, come on. It’s all a giant game. You tried to kill me over Dolores before, tried to ruin my credibility, tried to…” As he spoke, his voice raising, Logan was inching closer, eyes focused on you, willing you to open your eyes and look at him so he could tell you what he needed you to do. But you didn’t, and as Logan took a final step toward you, the hand at his side reaching for the gun on his hip, William reacted, drawing the knife from his belt and pressing the sharp side of the blade against your abdomen, skin visible thanks to the bottom two buttons of your vest being undone. No. He thought back to the way he’d treated Dolores the night in the Confederado camp, the way he’d jammed the knife into her stomach without pause. No, you can’t. You can’t, she’ll… 

 “Stop moving.” Your eyes flew open at that, gaze moving down to the knife and Logan heard you whimper, watched tears start leaking from the corners of your eyes. “One more step, Logan, that hand moves one more inch? I’ll do to her what you did to the woman I love.” She’s not real, William, she never was. You can’t love her. Not like…

 “William, think about this.” Logan said your name and you finally looked at him, wide eyes meeting his, the fear in them something he never wanted to see again. If he stabs her, she might not make it until the team gets here. “She’s alive. She’s real. If you do this, there’s no going back.” You were still crying, but Logan watched as you moved one of your arms, slowly, your hand reaching out to him as much as it could, fingers shaking. I’m right here. I’m not going to let him… “William, let her go, this isn’t about her, it’s about me.” He was pleading, but he didn’t know what else to do. “You already… she doesn’t... I’ll stop, I won’t keep looking for a way to get you out, just please, let her go. Let me get her help, I’ll say that it was the Hosts in the storyline, they won’t have to look into it, we’ll forget…” I mean it, just let her go.

 “No. You won’t.” William shook his head. “She’d never agree to that.” I think she would if it meant she got to live. I think she’d agree to anything right now, just like I would. “You’re so close, aren’t you? Almost ready to take what you have to the board?” William grinned, the expression chilling. “You won’t stop. Unless…” He bit down on his lower lip, turning the knife in his hand to press the tip into the exposed skin of your stomach. “Ask him to save you. Ask him to help you.” You stayed quiet, and William pushed the blade, your skin dimpling beneath the tip. “Fucking do it.” 

 Logan realized then that though he’d been thinking that William would be willing to compromise, he was wrong. He’s not expecting this to end well. He knows he’s fucked, this is a game to him. “L-Logan.” Logan looked away from William’s face, staring at you, and he heard the pain in your voice, almost as if you were seeing him for the first time. “You came.” 

 “I told you I would.” He nodded and so did you, though yours was barely a movement. “I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner, I should have -” His words were interrupted by a moan from you as William pushed harder, the sharpened tip of the knife slicing through your skin, blood beading around it. 

 “I said beg.” This is the game he chooses to play? She’s not a fucking Host, she won’t… 

 “Logan, please help me.” You forced the words out, Logan watching your fingers curl at your sides, head shaking back and forth. “Don’t let him hurt m-” Your words trailed off into a scream as William pushed again, more of the knife disappearing into your stomach. “Logan it hurts. Please… I… help me, Logan, don’t let him, help me, I -” He was frozen on the spot, watching as William inserted the knife further, blood leaking from the edges of the wound. Move. Move, Delos,or you’re going to watch her die.  

 “You have to watch, Logan! Fucking watch what I’m doing to her.” The tone of William’s voice madness mixed with glee, Logan - for a moment - thought back to the way he’d been with Dolores, the way he’d goaded William. This is my fault, if anything worse happens to her, it’s all my… You moaned out his name again and William twisted the knife, eyes on your abdomen and the wound he’d created there, ignoring Logan for the first time. Now. It has to be now.

 As Logan stepped forward, he reached into his pocket with one hand, pressing down on the tracking device to activate it, the small circular object buzzing once to let him know that it worked. Fifteen minutes. He continued moving and Logan watched as you turned your body toward William, raising one hand and pushing with the strength you had remaining. Logan’s shoulder connected with William’s chest and he reached out, using the hand that had been in his pocket to push you away from William, shoving you as hard as he could with one hand to the center of your chest. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. 

 You separated, crying out Logan’s name in surprise as you stumbled backwards, but Logan focused his attention back on William as the two men tumbled into the sand. Logan used his momentum to roll William onto his back before punching him once in the jaw, arm flying through the air without pause. Using his right hand, Logan reached for the gun on his belt before he pressed the muzzle to William’s chest, shaking his head back and forth. “Don’t fucking move.” William stared up at the dark haired man for a few seconds and then turned his head to the side, laughing. “What?”

 “Your girlfriend’s drowning, Logan. Looks like she pulled the knife out too, there’s blood all over the sand.” He knew it was dangerous, but Logan glanced at you, seeing that William was right, and made a decision. I have to. I have to save her. He looked away from you - the hardest thing he’d ever done - and squeezed the trigger. William shuddered beneath him, and Logan fired again, trying to buy himself time. When the man reached up to touch his chest where Logan had shot him, gasping for breath and trying to push his hands and the gun away, Logan snapped the cuffs onto first one wrist and then the other, staring down at William, who wore a look of shock on his face. “Good for you, Logan, you fi-” 

 “Yeah,” Logan sniffed, spinning the gun around in his hand before raising it above his head. “Fuck you, William.” He brought the butt of it down, smashing the handle into William’s temple twice. You deserve so much worse. Once William’s head had lolled to the side, Logan stood, grabbing the cuff chain and pulling William a few feet away from the water to make sure that the man wouldn’t drown, and then he ran to where you were laying, facedown in the wet sand, the saltwater rushing around your body. There’s too much blood. Logan sat down, rolling you onto your back and into his lap, one hand going to your stomach and hovering over the wound, though he knew it wouldn’t do much good. The supplies are all wet, everything’s… He ripped his shirt off, balling it up and pressing it down over your stomach. Please. They’ll be here soon. “I’m here.” He leaned down, stroking your hair with the hand that wasn’t tending to your wound and pressed his forehead against yours, taking a deep breath. “I’m right here and I love you, please hold on.” 

--- 

 Forcing your eyes open partially, you groaned at the pain that shot through your head as the low light filtered in through your still halfway closed lids. Where am I? Running your tongue over your lower lip, you let out a breath, trying to take a deeper one and wincing. “Hey, don’t do that.” Logan? “You’ve got four broken ribs, you’ve gotta…” You saw him move out of the corner of your eye and then Logan was sitting next to your bed, his dark eyes only inches from yours. “You’ve gotta take it easy.” At the sight of his face, you felt yourself start to cry, the tears leaking down and over your cheeks, but before you could reach up to wipe them away, he was doing it for you, his thumbs moving gently over your skin and lingering against the outer corners of your eyes. “I’m so sorry this happened to you.” You gave yourself a few more seconds to cry, and then tried to roll over and toward him, but he stopped you. “Can’t do that, either.” 

 “Wh-” Logan pulled his hand away from your face, reaching across your body and taking your right hand, his fingers closing around yours. Fuck my throat hurts. “Why?”

 “Your ribs aren’t the only thing that’s broken.” Logan’s smile was more of a grimace and he lowered his eyes for a second before staring at you, pressing his lips into a thin line. “Your right shoulder was dislocated, there’s a hairline fracture in your left elbow, your knee had a bunch of gravel in it that they had to dig out, you have a concussion and you…” He stopped, squeezing your hand gently. “You’ve got a bunch of staples in your stomach from…”

 “He stabbed me.” Your eyes widened and Logan nodded. “How did…” You shifted on the bed and Logan immediately stood, pulling his hand from yours to help you scoot upward on the mattress. “Does this…” You swallowed. “The bed, does it…” Logan was pushing the button before you got the rest of your sentence out. “Ok, stop.” Your upper body was raised, allowing you to look at him and not up at him, and you took a breath. “I’m so thirsty, can I…” 

 “Only water.” Logan turned, reaching for a pitcher and filling a cup that was sitting on the tray next to you. “They hooked you up to an IV, but you were really dehydrated, and we don’t…” Logan shook his head. “We don’t know how your stomach will handle…”

 “S’ok, Logan.” You closed your eyes. “Water’s fine.” He held the straw up to your lips and you took small sips, intensely thankful for the cool liquid as you swallowed a few times. “Thank you.” You cleared your throat, staring down at your legs. “He was going to kill me, Logan.” You heard him suck in a breath from next to you, and then he reached out again, hesitantly dropping his hand on top of yours. “He thought I was helping you get him out of Delos, so he…” 

 “Yeah.” Logan said your name and you turned your head to look at him, watching as he chewed on his lip. “I tried to keep you out of it, and it… he still.” You saw how tired he looked, how worried Logan was as he stared at you, his hand simply resting on top of yours instead of holding it. “I’m sorry. I’m so goddamn sorry, I should have…”

 “How long have I been here, Logan?” You were still speaking quietly, each word a struggle, but you needed to know, and you wanted to hear his voice. “When -”

 “Brought you in the day before yesterday, you’ve been out for…” He shook his head, eyes glistening. “You were barely conscious when the recovery team got to us, and by the time you got to the Mesa medical center, you weren’t awake anymore, but they had a monitor so I knew you …” He stopped, catching his breath. “You were in and out of it yesterday, they said that you needed to rest, even though you had the concussion, but I…”

 “You were here… the… whole time?” Why would he do that? “In m…”

 “They wouldn’t let me in the OR, but I’ve been with you since you got brought to this room.” You turned your hand over and squeezed, feeling pain shoot up your arm, but you didn’t care. Operating room? For stitches? They can do that in… 

 “How bad was it, Logan?” You felt yourself shiver. “I remember feeling him cut into me, and you were there, but I don’t…”

 “I think…” Logan’s head dropped. “I think I hurt you worse when I pushed you away from William when I tackled him, you fell on…” He looked back up. “I think you fell on the knife, and I shouldn’t have…”

 “Stop.” You forced the word out, finding the strength to make it a command. “Stop Logan, you saved me, he would have done worse if…” You remembered how it had felt to be William’s captive, the feeling of his hand as it had hit your cheek, the way his fist and foot had felt slamming into your stomach, how he hadn’t cared when you’d fallen to your knees behind the horse. “You couldn’t fight him if he was still…” 

 “I should have been more careful.” Logan was crying too, and all you wanted to do was lift your arm to touch his face, to tell him that it was going to be ok. Logan… “I needed to take him down so I could get back to you, I… I just pushed you, I didn’t even think…”

 “Where is he now?” You closed your eyes, settling back against the pillow. “What happened to him?” Logan laughed, the sound muffled as he wiped at his face. “I remember a gun, did you…”

 “I shot him.” Logan sniffed, and you opened your eyes again, turning your head toward him. “Twice, in the chest. It was enough to get him cuffed, and then I…” Logan frowned. “I knocked him out with my gun.” Shit. Your eyes widened, and you finally felt Logan’s fingers close around yours. “You pulled the knife out, or it fell out, I don’t know, but when I finally got over to you, you were bleeding bad, and… I just held my shirt against your stomach and waited.” He shook his head. “It was the longest fifteen minutes of my life.” You didn’t respond, your eyes on Logan’s face, and after a few seconds, he sighed, pulling his hand back to drop yours. “I’ll go get the doctor, now that you’re awake, they’ll want to -”

 “No.” You shook your head, feeling it start to pound with the movement. “Don’t leave me, please, I…” I need you here. He looked surprised, but Logan nodded back, leaning over you to press the call button that was resting on the mattress next to you. Lift your arm. You ignored the pain, lifting your left arm and sliding your fingers up toward Logan’s shoulder, thumb pressing in on the inside of his bicep, even though you couldn’t see the ink beneath it.  He said something on the beach, and I need to know...

 --- 

 After talking to him, you were in and out of sleep for the next twelve hours, and though Logan still refused to leave your room outright, he did take ten minutes away from you to hastily shower in your bathroom, turning the water on as hot as he could stand it. While you were in surgery, he’d called Juliet, informing her of what had happened, that her husband had tried to kill you and was being held in the Mesa jail while you were in surgery so that the amount of damage that had been done to you over the course of the 48 hours William had been holding you could be assessed. She hadn’t believed it at first, but by the end of the conversation, he’d heard in her voice that she knew he wasn’t lying, and Juliet had promised to be on the Delos jet as soon as possible, coming out to bring both of you home. Too little, too late, Jules. 

 Logan had been busy while you were getting worked on, also calling your family to let them know what had happened, even though the Guest Experience Team had volunteered to do it for him, letting your boss know that you wouldn’t be returning as scheduled, even going so far as to contact the Delos corporate lawyers on your behalf, telling them to get ready for one of the easiest cases they could imagine taking on. He’d changed out of his park attire, too, sending his bloody clothes off with the security team as evidence, but he’d been too keyed up to shower, and knew that he needed to. 

 You’d looked better coming out of the OR, though you still hadn’t looked great, but the fact that you were breathing, the rise and fall of your chest steady under the thin gown you wore was enough to calm him slightly. I’m right here. You might not want me to be when you wake up, but I’m here now. He wasn’t your emergency contact, but the doctors and nurses had taken pity on him since he’d been with you and it was common knowledge that the two of you were together, showing him your medical reports. When he saw your injury list, Logan finally broke down, his eyes scanning over the lengthy list of the abuse you’d suffered at Willaim’s hands as the tears streaked down his dust-covered cheeks. I should have killed him. He deserves it. 

 Logan had stayed in your room throughout the time you slept, drifting between being totally out of it and halfway conscious again, but you’d never opened your eyes, and so he’d stayed quiet, waiting. She’ll wake up when she can. He knew your body was fighting to rehydrate itself, and the nurses came and went like clockwork, replacing the bags of fluids that you were being fed, redressing your shoulders and upper back with the medicated bandages that they’d applied to combat the sunburn you’d gotten. Your dislocated arm was in a sling, the fractured elbow in a lightweight brace meant to keep it bent without the risk of you worsening the injury, and Logan was devastated. This shouldn’t have happened to her. 

 He was angry at himself for not seeing that William was capable of doing something like this to you, even though he’d experienced it firsthand. But this is worse. He didn’t … he didn’t hurt me, not physically like this. You were battered, and though Logan was thankful that William had never laid a hand on his sister in the years that they’d been married, he wished that the man hadn’t tried to get to him through you. There was no reason for this. He slept - fitfully, curled up on the couch in the corner of your room - waking up every hour or so to check on you, the backs of his fingers running over the skin of your bruise-free cheek as he stood over your bed, brushing your hair out of your face. They’d cleaned you up after completing your surgery, rinsing your hair out and giving you a quick bath, and you looked more like yourself, but Logan still wasn’t satisfied. 

 Even speaking with you for the few minutes he had before calling for the doctor hadn’t been enough, but Logan didn’t want to push it. We have a lot of things to talk about when we get home, now isn’t the time. He dried himself off, stepping out of the bathroom after he was redressed - wearing only a pair of comfortable sweats and a t shirt, and was happy to see that you were awake again - and that you looked much more alert. “Hey.” Your voice quiet, you turned your head to look at him. “I feel better.” You sound better, too.

 “Good.” Logan ran a hand through his damp hair, nodding. “You must be more hydrated, the bags are working.” He eyed the IV drip and then looked at you, watching as you lifted your hand and pressed the button to raise your bed. “Be careful, you -”

 “I’m on pain meds, Logan. It hurts, but it’s not as bad…” You shook your head. “You need to get out of this room.” She wants me to leave? “I heard you on the phone earlier, Logan. You aren’t responsible for me, you don’t have to…” You shook your head, looking down. “You haven’t seen Juliet yet, and I heard you say she’s here, you should…” You exhaled, pressing the hand attached to the arm in the sling against your stomach as you winced. “I’ll be alright, Logan, if you go.” He looked at you, staying silent. She doesn’t want me here. He felt his knees go weak but he agreed with you, walking back over to the couch and putting on his shoes. Logan stepped next to your bed and looked down at you, unsure of what to say. I should just go. What’s there to say? “I’m OK, Logan. I’m not going anywhere.” You smiled at him, the first one he’d seen in days, and he felt his eyebrows rising. “And maybe when you come back, you could bring me some ice cream?” She wants me to come back? He finally laughed at that - some of it in relief - nodding his head before he turned and walked away from your bed, your soft voice stopping him at the door. “Vanilla, please?”

“Of course.” Maybe. Maybe things will be OK.

---

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[something-tofightfor]

Ransom - four

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (Ink AU)

Word Count: 8315

Rating: NSFW (language, aftermath of physical abuse of a female)

Author’s Note: Thanks to everyone that’s read this one. This part of the story may be over, but there’s a lot more to come for these two. 

Summary: Your healing begins, and you and Logan have a lot of things to talk about...but are you wanting to talk about the same things? 

There was a knock on your door before it opened, and you watched as Logan stepped inside, a small container in one hand. You felt relief when you saw him, and though he walked slowly over to you, you saw the look in his eyes bordered between fear and hope. What’s he waiting for? You hurt - the truth was that you ached all over, even with the medication, and the doctor told you that that would likely be the case for at least a few weeks, along with the pain that you felt from your sunburn, which wouldn’t last for more than a few days. But it wasn’t the pain from your ordeal that was making your chest hurt - it was the way Logan was looking at you, and what you didn’t see in his eyes. What happened?  “Did you bring me a -” He reached into his pocket, pulling out a single spoon that was wrapped in plastic, and you smiled, at least as much as you could. Of course you did. “Thanks.” You reached out with the hand that wasn’t in the sling and he pulled the top off of the container before he handed it to you, unwrapping the spoon and sticking it into the ice cream. Shit, this is going to be complicated. Logan sat, watching your movements, but didn’t offer to help - and you were grateful for it.

 You could move the arm in the brace, but it was painful, and so you transferred the container to that hand, using the other one to dig the spoon in, bringing it to your lips and then swallowing. That’s the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted. You ate a few bites and then motioned for Logan to take it from you. “Done?” You nodded, not wanting to make yourself sick, and he took it from you. “I’ll find a fr-”

 “No, Logan. Eat it.” You used your legs to shift upward, sitting straight up on the bed and pulling your shoulders away from the blankets behind you as he ate. Time to tell him. “I’m leaving tonight.” He froze with the spoon halfway to his mouth, furrowing his brow. 

 “What?” You licked your lips, sighing. Don’t be difficult about this, Logan.

 “I’m leaving this room tonight, I don’t want to be here anymore.” Logan shook his head but you continued. “I talked to the doctor while you were gone, and you can too, but they…” Shrugging your shoulders, you watched as he put the container down, leaning in. “He asked if I wanted to stay or go, and said as long as I let them do one more fluid infusion and talked to the police, I can leave. It’s been two days, and aside from the sunburn, it’s all…” You shrugged. “It is what it -”

 “Don’t do that.” Logan shook his head, an angry edge to his voice. “Don’t trivialize this, he could have… you almost…”

 “Yes, Logan. I almost died. Your brother in law had me abducted, dragged me across Westworld, abused me for two days and then stabbed me on the beach.” You gave him a thin lipped smile. “I could have died.” His lips parted, confusion overtaking the wariness in his eyes. “But I didn’t.” You reached toward him, your fingertips finding his chest. “Because you came for me.” Because you… Logan was quiet for a long time, and you almost wanted to laugh. You’d rarely seen him speechless, never seen him unable to respond to something he was presented with. There’s a first time for everything. “They’ve got him, right? Somewhere here, in a cell?” Logan nodded - only once. “And you told them what he did? What you…” 

 “Yes. They can check the logs of the Hosts that I interacted with, the logs of the ones you were with, too. They’ll see… what he did to you, and if they aren’t able to see it, they can hear it. He’s not going to get away with it, especially if you can… coherently tell them what he did to you.” You closed your eyes and thought back to the previous few days, the heat from the sun, the way the blood felt oozing from your skin, the way he’d pulled you off of the horse and put his hands on you. I can do that. But I don’t want to think about it now.

 “The doctor’s coming back later with some sort of… medicated lotion? I don’t know exactly, but he said it would help the sunburn, decrease the chance of scarring from the blisters.” You swallowed. “My shoulders and nose are… not good, but he said…”

 “How are you so calm?” Logan reached up, pulling your hand away from his chest and settling it back on your lap, his fingers running over your wrist. “How are you…”

 “What good is being hysterical going to do? I can’t change what happened. I can’t change what he did. I can’t… take back any of it, or ignore it, or pretend that I…” You closed your eyes. “I just want to be in a real bed, Logan, with real sheets, with…” You stopped yourself, still thinking of the look in his eyes. With you. “I want to deal with this in a place that isn’t filled with people, and if Juliet’s here with the jet, I’m sure you’ll go back with her when -”

 “You think I’m leaving you here?” He finally sounded like Logan again and you opened your eyes and looked up, finding that he was staring at you in disbelief. “I know you probably don’t want anything to do with me anymore, but you’re flying home on that jet, and when we get back to Los Angeles, you’ve got the Delos legal team waiting, and…”

 “What?” It felt like another punch to the gut - except it hurt more than the one William had landed, and you moved without thinking about how much it would hurt, swinging your legs over the edge of the bed and trying to get closer to Logan. “Nothing to do with you? What are you -” He stuck both hands out but stopped short of touching you and then he groaned in frustration, curling his fingers into his palms. 

 “Lay down, you’re going to -” 

 “No, Logan.” Upset, you sighed, wishing that you could use the braced arm to push yourself forward. This recovery is going to be a nightmare. “Why wouldn’t I want anything to do with you?” 

 “He did this to you because of me. You’re in this bed because of me, and…” He reached up, swiping a hand through his hair and then met your eyes. “I wanted to be sure that I had what I needed to get him out of Delos, but I knew that he was capable of…”

 “And that makes this your fault?” Jesus, Logan, he did the same thing to you, you know that you can’t… “There was no way to stop this, Logan, no way to… he did what he did to you because of something you did to him, why would he hurt me? You had no reason to think I was in…”

 “If I’d worked faster, he would already be -” 

 “Stop.” You shook your head. “I’m not having this conversation with you in a hospital room, Logan.” Your hands were still joined on your lap, you saw as you looked down. “Can we just…” You lifted the arm in the sling as best as you could, pressing your palm to your face and gritting your teeth at the pain. “I have to talk to the security team and the police before I go, but until we can leave… I want to be back in our room, Logan. With you.” He needs to hear it. “Please.” He didn’t answer you right away, but when he did, Logan didn’t speak, instead using the hand that wasn’t holding yours to tilt your chin up, his face close. “L-”

 “I don’t ever want to let you out of my sight again.” His words sure, Logan shook his head, not breaking eye contact. “I…” He stopped himself, nose twitching slightly and then leaned in, lips landing against yours gently. What is he… 

 “Logan I haven’t brushed my teeth in -”

 “I don’t care.” He kissed you again and then pulled back, thumb rubbing against your lips. “At all.”

 --- 

 A few hours later, you’d walked out of the hospital room with him, slightly unsteady on your feet, but Logan’s arm wound gently around your back, careful not to move your shoulder too much or put pressure on your ribs. You’d refused his help with getting dressed, but Logan stayed in your room as you changed from the hospital gown into some of the clothing you’d brought with you to the Mesa with the help of a nurse, biting down on the inside of his cheek as you shrugged out of the thin material. Your stomach and sides were covered in bruises, the bandage that covered the staples small and tidily affixed to your skin, but it was your shoulders that were the worst, also completely covered in bandages, despite the application of the gel that you’d told him about. He hadn’t seen anything but your face up close, but he knew that things were bad. How could anyone do that to another person? He stayed put as the nurse helped you into the bathroom, and when you came out a few minutes later, your hair was brushed and loosely braided, your chapped lips covered in a pale balm. She looks better. 

 But Logan knew all too well what William was capable of, knew that you’d been lucky, at least in that he’d never left you alone, never stripped you and sent you off to roast in the sun for days. You were still somewhat coherent when you’d been found, but that meant that you’d felt everything, had known exactly what was happening to you. I didn’t. I didn’t even know who I was, but she… 

 No one said anything to you as the two of you made your way down the hallway and toward the lobby - and then the elevators - but Logan knew it was likely because he was with you. Good. You leaned against him in the elevator, but neither of you spoke until you were safely behind the closed door of your suite, the temperature set to be almost as cool as possible, courtesy of an app on his phone. “Did you…” He watched as you made your way through the room, slightly steadier on your feet. “It’s so cold.” 

 “When I got back to Los Angeles after…” He followed you, staying a few steps behind. “Even after I was released from the hospital, all I wanted was cold, I just thought…”

 “No, it’s… it feels good, Logan, my face still feels like it’s on fire, I…” You stopped in front of the mirror for the first time and he watched your eyes widen and then fill with tears. “Logan, I look… Jesus, I look…” You reached up, fingers prodding at the bruises and Logan could do nothing but watch, heart pounding. “People must think…”

 “They don’t think shit, and if they do, it doesn’t matter.” He stepped behind you, watching you in the mirror. “You’re not a Host, they can’t just…”

 “They can’t rebuild me.” You leaned forward, shoulders hunched. “That’s what he said to me, too, that after what he was going to do to me, they couldn’t rebuild me.” That sick fuck, I can’t… “He … how did he hide it, Logan? How did…” You were crying again, the tears rolling down your cheeks. “I shouldn’t have been so excited to play the stupid narrative, I would have seen it sooner, I would have…” 

 “Look, I know…” Logan tentatively put his hands on your hips from behind, stepping closer and tilting his face down to press his lips against the side of your head. “You’re going to blame yourself, you’re going to wonder what you could have done differently.” He closed his eyes, inhaling, and felt you lean back into him, weight settling against his chest. “I did the same thing, tried to put it all together, tried to rationalize it, but there’s no… there’s no way to explain why he did it, except that he’s…” Determined to get back at me because of what he thinks I did to him. “Unhinged.” Logan opened his eyes, meeting yours in the mirror. “But he won’t hurt you again.” 

 “He won’t hurt anyone again, Logan. Not you, not me, not Juliet, not even the Hosts.” You turned, looking up at him. “He told me what he’s done to them, what he does to her when she doesn’t remember him, and it’s…” You shook your head. “But you remember, Logan. And so do I.” You reached up, settling your forearm against his shoulder, fingers moving against his beard. “And they didn’t believe you then, but they will now.” What? 

 “This isn’t about me, it’s not… you just, you need to…” She’s right, though, but it took… 

 “It’s all about you, Logan.” You shook your head. “Don’t you get it? I heard him tell you that it would have been easier if you’d died. But you didn’t. And all he talked about was how you ruined his life, you turned him into…” You stopped, swallowing. “He took me… hurt me because he thought it would hurt you worse than…” The room was silent, except for the sound of the air conditioner, but Logan could hear his heart pounding as much as he could feel it. This isn’t how I wanted to… 

 “It did.” Logan carefully cupped your uninjured cheek in his palm, wetting his lips. “What he did to me, what it… what happened to me after?” He shook his head. “None of it was… I was so scared when I realized you were gone, and then when I knew William had you?” Here we go. “I was fucking terrified. All I could think about was… I needed to get you back, needed to know you were OK.” He lowered his head, the hand on your hip unconsciously tightening. “I told you I’d find you, and I…” Logan’s fingers tucked hair behind your ear as he looked back up, and he took in every detail of your face - the light in your eyes, the curve of your lips; the way, even though the bridge of your nose and forehead were sunburned, the skin of your cheek and temple bruised black and blue, you were still stunning to him. “It’s because I love you.” 

 He felt his chest expand as soon as the words were out, and Logan knew - without a doubt - that he meant them. “You what?” Your voice was quiet, eyes going wide. “You lov… what?” He watched your reaction, watched as you began to collapse, your legs giving out. Shit. He caught you as gently as he could, lowering you to the ground and sinking down to his knees with you as you hissed in pain. “Logan, you…”

 “I do. And…” He held you against his body, one hand gripping your thigh and the other holding you beneath your injured shoulder, his chest supporting you as much as he could. “And for a couple days, I thought I wouldn’t get the chance to tell you.” You were quiet, and Logan drew in a deep breath, shaking his head. “And that hurt worse than anything he could ever physically do to me.” It was true, and though Logan didn’t know what he’d expected your response to be to his declaration, he hadn’t expected total silence. At least I told her. 

 “I know you do.” Surprised, he looked down at you, feeling as you shifted against him, sitting up straighter with a wince. What? “I know you love me, Logan Delos.” He saw a hint of a smile on your lips and a faint spark of light in your eyes, and he furrowed his brow, waiting. “I heard you say it on the beach, when you were…” You shook your head. “I heard you but I didn’t know if I was imagining it…” Ruined that too, I guess. “Don’t say it just because you feel guilty about…” You gestured to yourself. “This.” 

 “When’s the last time I said something because I felt guilty?” You paused, but Logan didn’t give you a chance to speak. “Especially something like that, hmm?” You opened your mouth but he cut you off again. “I’ll tell you. Never.” Logan took a deep breath. “Might not matter anymore, because how could you feel…” He shook his head. “Look, I’m taking care of your medical bills, and your legal fees are covered, too. You need treatment, therapy, whatever you want, it’s done. This happened because of me, and you don’t need to see m-”

 “I love you too, Logan.” There was no hesitation in your words, no doubt - but they still sounded out of place to him after what you’d just assumed of him. “And I’ll take the support, but I’d much rather have you.” That’s a little better, but... “What happened to me wasn’t your fault, and it wasn’t mine, either.” You leaned in and Logan felt your nose brush against his cheek. “It was his, Logan. Now. Then. It always will be, and -” He turned his head and kissed you, trying to be mindful of the pain you were in, but Logan couldn’t help lifting the hand from your leg and tangling his fingers in your hair, holding you to him. She loves me? But as you gently dragged your tongue along his lips and Logan parted them for you in response, he realized that you were right. It’s not our fault. And they’ll believe me now, because they’ll believe her. He felt your fingers closing against the material of his shirt over his stomach - not as forcefully as they usually did, your other arm up and over his shoulder, and he pressed his palm against your lower back, happy that his touch there hadn’t caused you to react with pain. At least I can touch her somewhere. 

 “Let’s get you off the floor.” Logan murmured the words against your lips and you nodded, but before you could attempt to move away from him, he pulled the hand from your hair and slid it beneath your knees, picking you up as he stood. “I can carry you if -”

 “No, let me walk.” Alright. He leaned down, letting your legs slowly lower back to the ground and giving you a chance to balance before he released you from his hold. He waited to see what you’d do, but instead of turning and heading back to the bed, you watched him, eyes on his face. “Logan, I…” You swallowed, stepping closer and turning your head to press your cheek against his chest, the arm in the brace rising to lay against his back. “Please, I need to…” What does she… “I don’t care how much it hurts, I …” He lifted a hand to cradle the back of your head and you nodded, whispering his name again. She wants me to…? Logan carefully circled his arm around your waist, guiding you closer to him so that you were pressed against his body, no space left between you. 

 He felt your fingers against his back, tightening against his skin and then you were crying again, body shaking as he held you. He knew the feeling well. After his own ordeal, when he’d left the hospital, he’d spent a solid two weeks at home by himself, trying to deal with the pain of recovery and the sting of no one believing him, he’d cried often, something that he wouldn’t admit to anyone but you. Logan took a deep breath and laid his cheek against the crown of your head, closing his eyes. You’d be out of work for weeks at least, and although your arm would be able to be out of the sling for your shoulder in a few days, your elbow would take longer to heal. And her ribs, she’s… “Stay with me.” He spoke without lifting his head, talking loudly enough that you heard him over your tears. “When we get back, I mean.” You froze, but didn’t move, and so Logan continued. If there was ever a time to press my luck, it’s now. “You shouldn’t be alone, not while you’re…” You stepped back and Logan let you go, straightening up. “You can’t lift your arm yet, can’t bend the other one, your ribs are going to hurt like a bitch for weeks, and…” He swallowed. Honesty. “I’ll lay awake at night thinking about something happening to those staples in your stomach.” 

 “You were alone.” He reached up, again wiping beneath your eyes and nodding. “And no one -”

 “That doesn’t mean you have to be.” The pad of his thumb slid over your bruised cheek, but you leaned into his touch instead of away from it. “I can work from home, and -”

 “What am I going to do, Logan?” Your eyes widened suddenly. “My job, I need to -” He shook his head back and forth. You don’t need to worry about this now, you don’t… “I have to work, and I don’t know…”

 “Stop.” Not unkindly, he interjected, hand still on your cheek. “When you’re ready to go back, you have a job.” You opened your mouth but Logan pressed two fingers to your lips, staring at you. “You do. If you want it.” He watched the look in your eyes change as you reacted to his words. You might not want to go back, and we’ll deal with that, too. “Let me take care of you.” The weight of his words hung in the air between you, and you closed your eyes, Logan’s hand moving to the side of your neck, where he noticed faint bruising. What the fuck, how did I miss that? 

 “I can’t do anything for you, Logan.” You stared up at him again, and for long moments, he didn’t understand what you meant. Do anything? “I can barely move, there’s no way I can -” She means… 

 “Are you kidding me right now?” The words came out with an edge and he watched you wince. Shit. “I’m sorry, but…” Logan’s hand skimmed up your back and to your shoulder, fingers resting against the side of your body that wasn’t in the sling. “That’s the last thing on my mind, you need to…” He swore, putting slight pressure on the bandages atop your skin before realizing what he was doing. “That’s not what this is about. I just want to see you get better, everything else comes later.” 

 “Careful. That doesn’t sound very much like the Logan Delos -” He laughed, finally feeling the mood in the room change as you made a legitimate joke, and Logan pulled you back to him, holding you as tightly as he dared. “I’ll stay with you, Logan, if that’s what you really want, I …”

“Yes. That’s what I want.” He glanced past you, seeing that the sun was setting over the desert, and Logan sighed. “Are you hungry, I know they gave you…” 

 “I could eat.” You pulled yourself out of Logan’s arms before you walked to the bed and he was happy to see that you were steadier on your feet than you had been previously. Watching you sit down slowly, Logan actually grinned. She’s going to be alright. “But I really want a shower, Logan, I feel like I’m still covered in…” Yeah, I know that feeling all too well. “I should have asked before I left the hospital, they could have…”

 “I’ll help you.” He followed you to the bed, sitting next to you after he reached into the side table and pulled out the room service menu. “Order what you want, and then after we eat, we’ll take a shower.” 

 --- 

 You wanted nothing more than to order everything on the menu, but you also knew that your stomach wouldn’t tolerate it, so you stuck to breakfast, even though it was getting dark out. While waiting for it to arrive, you laid back on the sheets, closing your eyes and turning your head to the side to bury your face against the pillow’s cool surface Though you’d slept for the majority of your stay in the medical wing, you were exhausted - and finally comfortable. Dozing off without realizing it, you woke to Logan saying your name and the smell of food. Oh. He helped you sit, but rather than moving you to the table, Logan wheeled the tray in front of you, swinging it over the bed so that you had easier access to it. “I know,” he said, biting down on his lower lip. “That you won’t ask me for help, but if you need it, I -”

 “Thank you.” You swallowed, reaching for the fork with one hand and using it to cut into your food, concentrating on bringing it to your mouth. One bite at a time. When it was apparent that you’d be able to feed yourself, Logan started eating, too, sitting next to you on the bed. That burger smells amazing. As you ate, you thought about a lot of things, but the one that stood out in your mind was Logan telling you that he loved you - and you repeating it back to him. Of all the ways you’d imagined admitting how you felt to him, the scenario you found yourself in hadn’t even registered in your mind. But it’s out there now, and we both… 

 You loved him probably more than you’d ever be able to tell him, but the words still hadn’t come out easily, and the guilt you’d accused him of having didn’t sit well with you, because you knew it wasn’t true. But why would he love me? You chewed through a piece of toast, eyes on the tray in front of you. Being with Logan and believing that he loved you were two separate things; or at least they had been. Not anymore. You’d never given up hope that he’d get to you - not even as William had yanked you off the back of your horse the final time, wrenching your shoulder out of its socket as you’d fallen to the ground, your wrist still held between his fingers. Your throat was sore from him throttling you, and as Tanner had taken over, dragging you across the sand to the water’s edge, you’d still hoped that some way, somehow Logan would find you, coming in at the last second and figuring out how to fix things. But we waited for hours. 

 William hadn’t spoken to you aside from telling you that he’d wait as long as it took, and as your body became more and more exhausted, the sound of the waves taunting you as you reached the two and a half days without water mark, you’d slipped in and out of awareness, Tanner taking pity on you as he held you up, otherwise frozen in place by William’s quiet command. But he came. He saved me. Realizing that Logan was right in front of you had changed everything, giving you the will to try and fight, to push away from William, and though you wouldn’t ever tell him, Logan’s shove had been what caused you to fall on the knife, driving it deeper into your stomach. Even though you’d only been vaguely aware of what was happening, you remembered pulling it from your skin before falling face down on the sand, your only thought that Logan would still find a way to get you somewhere safe. He did. At some point, you’d ask Logan how he’d managed to rescue you, but there was no rush, especially if you’d be living with him. Living with him? Who would have thought? “You done?” 

 Looking up, you saw that Logan was watching you, concern in his eyes. “Yeah, I can’t eat anything else.” You’d finished more than half of your food, but the thought of the clean water was even more appealing to you. “You don’t have to help me, Logan, I can -”

 “Don’t.” He was already standing, pulling the tray away and when you got to your feet, he put his hand against your back again - not to offer support, but to tell you that he was there. “Don’t pretend you don’t need me.” Fine. 

 A few minutes later, he’d started the water, closing the bathroom door behind you to contain the warmth in the room, and was patiently watching as you undressed. Removing your pants had been no issue, but you were having a problem with your shirt, even though it had seemed simple when the nurse did it, guiding your arms through the sleeves of the thin hoodie. Fuck this. “Logan, can you help me?” He nodded, stepping forward. “I just need -”

 “I’ve got you, OK?” He tilted your chin up, looking into your eyes. “It’s just us. No pretending. I’m right here.” Nodding and then averting your eyes, you waited while he removed the sling from your arm, using one hand to stabilize your shoulder after unbending it slowly, easing the sleeve of your hoodie down over it. He removed the strap of your tank top, too, before replacing the sling and settling your arm back in, moving to the other side. With that one, he wasn’t as careful, removing the top layer in one motion, following it by sliding the strap down, too, but leaving your chest covered. “You doin’ alright?” You nodded, still not meeting his eyes, and Logan leaned in to kiss you, his lips catching the corner of your mouth. No, this is embarrassing. “Just gotta get this off, and we can get in.” He made quick work of your tank top and underwear, and then met your eyes again. “Gotta pull these bandages off your shoulders, doc said…” Yeah, I know. He carefully peeled the gauze away, and then you were totally bare, standing naked in front of him, something that you’d done countless times before - yet this time, you were anxious. 

 “Don’t look at me, Logan, it’s…” He took his clothes off quickly, leaving his underwear on, and then led you into the walk-in shower, pulling the glass door closed behind you, but didn’t say anything. The spray of the water hitting your skin felt incredible, and without telling him to, he’d adjusted the water to the warm side of room temperature. I would have turned it up as hot as it gets, and that would have been… Closing your eyes, you let the water run down your body, breathing as deeply as was possible without pain, but before you could even reach for the soap, Logan’s hands were on you, gently using a hand towel to clean your back. 

 “I’m gonna start here.” He spoke quietly and you nodded, even though you kept your eyes closed. “Tell me if it hurts.” It all hurts, Logan. He took his time on you, long fingers and low tone coaxing you to adjust your stance every few minutes as he moved to a new area. Everywhere he touched you, you felt Logan working to undo the pain William had inflicted on your body over the previous days. While you knew he cared, knew that he loved you, you’d never felt Logan’s touch so gentle before, and it left you off balance in the best way possible. There was nothing sexual about the way he was touching you, but you felt it all the same; the way he worked carefully on the parts of you that were hurt the worst - replacing the towel he’d used on your back and sides with his hands as he got to your shoulders, leaning down to kiss the sides of your neck where William’s thumbs had left their mark. I never thought… “Sit down.”

 Opening your eyes, you watched him nod, the small smile on his lips betrayed by the pained look in his eyes, but you sat nonetheless, leaning back and allowing the wall to support your upper body’s weight. “Logan, what -” He knelt in front of you, picking the towel up again and went to work on your legs, eyes focused on the skin in front of him and nothing else. This has to be… The water rained down on you, even as you sat on the small ledge, and you watched as it soaked Logan, the drops running down the planes of his tanned face. “Hey.” He glanced up and you held his gaze, biting on your lower lip. “Thank you. I wouldn’t have been able to do this myself.” You watched as Logan swallowed, one hand beneath your injured knee, the other one holding the towel and poised against the top of your thigh. “You don’t -”

 “You don’t need to thank me.” He licked his lips, taking a deep breath. “The burns on my body were... not worse than yours, but they were all over, and I had to learn…” He lowered his head and then raised it back up, squaring his shoulders. “This isn’t just a sunburn from the pool, and it’s not pity either. I know what it’s like, and I want to do this for you.” You don’t need to explain. His lips twitched as he tried to smile and then he looked down again, finishing with your first leg before he moved to the other, less gentle with that one but still careful. “Can you stand again? I need to get your…” You reached out to him with the arm that was in the brace and Logan pulled you to your feet after gripping your bicep gently. “Chest and stomach and then I’ll wash your hair, alright?” He’s going to wash my… With a single nod, he started soaping your chest up, foregoing the towel again to use his hands, carefully working from the top down, not lingering in any one place. It felt right to have his hands back on you, and you realized, as he reached your breasts, that Logan needed the contact as much as you did - simply because he needed the reassurance that you were right there in front of him, alive and breathing, though injured. His hands moved lower and you looked down to watch him, but were unprepared for the quiet sob you heard as his fingertips moved over your bruised and bandaged abdomen. “I’m going to fucking kill him.” 

 --- 

 He’d held it together until you turned to face him, allowing him to work on the front of your body. Though your shoulders and upper back had been badly burned, any bruising there had been hidden by the ink that covered your skin, the familiar lines soothing him as he cleaned you. Even your legs hadn’t been that bad; they weren’t burned, and while you had the bandage on one knee and some blisters on your feet, it wasn’t until you stood again that he got the full impact of the worst of your injuries. The bandage on your stomach had been changed to a clear, waterproof one, and Logan could see the wound through it - raised, red and still angry looking, especially with the staples glinting against your skin. That fucker. “Hey.” You finally spoke, drawing his attention. “It’s done, Logan, you can’t change it, it… it’ll heal.” You were smiling at him, the expression small but genuine. “”They told me that the staples don’t need to be removed, that Delos developed a special…”

 “Yeah.” He swallowed hard, nodding. “All our medical stuff is really advanced, they probably could have given you an injection to heal everything faster, but you couldn’t consent to it, so they stuck to the regular treatment. The staples are …” He moved his fingers in slow circles, careful not to press hard against your ribs. “They were a compromise, because it’s all they use.” And they’re the best option. “As soon as the recovery team got to us, I knew you were going to be…”

 “No.” You reached out to him, fingers finding his arm, right above the elbow. “As soon as you got there, Logan, I knew it was going to be alright.” What? But I… “You said you were gonna save me, and you did.” Logan had done a lot of things in his life, but he’d never felt the way he did about doing something like he did when it came to finding and getting to you - and hearing you say it. “I’m going to be OK, Logan.” You tightened your hold on his arm. “And it’s because of you.” No it’s not. 

 “But it’s my -”

 “We’re not doing this, Delos.” You stepped closer, and Logan stopped washing your skin, instead resting his hands on your hips. No, she can’t get closer, this isn’t… I can’t let… “It’s not your fault, and I won’t let you think it is.” You rose onto your toes to kiss him on the mouth, but you didn’t linger. “Now.” You trailed your fingers up his arm, stopping at his elbow. “You said you were going to wash my hair.” She isn’t going to let me get lost in this. He laughed but nodded, and Logan motioned for you to turn away again, urging you forward and more directly underneath the spray of the showerhead, reaching for he bottle of shampoo that you’d used the night you’d first arrived. He took the rubber band from the end of your braid, running his fingers through your hair to loosen it and let the water do its job, soaking it through and then squeezed a healthy amount of the fragrant gel onto his hands. Taking a deep breath, Logan began working it into your hair, starting with your scalp. Carefully, because he knew that that was likely sunburned too, Logan massaged your head, each quiet sigh of pleasure hitting him right in the chest. Those sounds. I can’t believe… 

 “Turn around.” You did, facing him again and Logan stepped closer, exhaling as you leaned forward, placing your forehead on his chest as he used his hands to help rinse the shampoo from your hair. You kissed his chest, lips moving over his wet skin in thanks, and Logan wrapped one arm around your waist, the other hand flattening against the back of your head and holding it against him. I don’t know who needs this more. “One more thing and then we can get out.” He kissed the top of your head, reluctant to let you go, but knowing that you likely needed to sit, and reached for the second bottle. 

 You turned away from him for a second time, and by the time Logan had finished with you hair, he saw that you were slightly unsteady on your feet again. “I’m gonna sit, Logan, I -” Sit? We’re done. He tilted his head in confusion but you actually winked at him, gesturing with the hand in the sling at his toiletries. “You’ve gotta shower too, Delos.” You glanced down. “And that means taking those off.” 

 “No, I can’t, we -” You laughed and though it was more subdued than usual, he was glad to hear the sound. 

 “Logan, I’m dehydrated and injured, not blind.” It was his turn to laugh but Logan complied with your direction, waiting until you’d re-seated yourself on the bench to slide his soaked underwear down his legs, kicking them off to the side. She’s right. He felt you watching him as he grabbed the loofah and soaped up his body, using one hand to balance himself against the wall as he worked on each leg. He glanced at you as he moved, and Logan was happy to see that even though you still looked tired, you were still looking at him with desire written all over your face. She still… “Don’t forget your hair.” You leaned back, raising an eyebrow and Logan raised his arms, scrubbing at his scalp with long fingers and closing his eyes as the water ran down his chest. 

 He felt better as he shut the water off, reaching for the door and pushing it open. “Let me get a towel for you, and…” He stepped out and grabbed one of the folded towels from the counter, wrapping it around his waist and running his hands through his hair before picking up a second and turning back to you. “What -” You’d pushed to your feet and stepped toward him, a determined look on your face. “Be careful, you…”

 “I need to do this, Logan.” Meeting his eyes, you stopped as you exited the glass enclosure, head shaking back and forth. “I’m happy to have you help me, but I can’t let you do everything.” You lifted your elbow slightly, sighing. “Help me dry off, and then I want to take this sling off for a while, I don’t need it if I’m just sitting. He worked quickly, using the towel to dry your skin and then carefully squeezed your hair out the way he’d seen you do it countless times before. “Let it air dry, Logan. No one’s going to see me until we leave, whenever that is, and… it doesn’t matter.” He heard defeat creeping into your voice again and was determined to stop it from worsening. 

 “Let me go get you another pair of pants, I’ll be right back.” He stepped out of the small room and hurried to your suitcase, digging through it and finding nothing suitable for sleep. Why the fuck do we only sleep naked? He looked around and then remembered that he’d changed into a fresh pair of sweats earlier in the medical wing. Those will work. He grabbed the robe that was hanging on the outside of the bathroom door and stepped back in, your name on the tip of his tongue, but stopped speaking immediately. Oh no. 

 You were standing in front of the mirror in the bright lights of the bathroom, still totally nude, and you were staring at your reflection, your head turned to the side. “I didn’t …” You swallowed, leaning in and bringing your fingertips up slowly to touch your cheek. “I didn’t know it was this bad, the bathroom downstairs wasn’t…” He stepped closer to you, unsure of what to say, and Logan knew, in that moment, that he’d do whatever it took to make sure that William never forgot what he’d done to you, paying for it every day for the rest of his life. He doesn’t get to make her feel this way. “They took pictures, didn’t they.” You met his eyes in the mirror and Logan nodded, wincing. “And people will see them during the…”

 “Yes.” He took his place next to you, looking down as you continued to stare at yourself in the glass. “They’re evidence, and your lawyers will need them to prove that…” Logan closed his eyes. “That he did what he did.” You nodded, and Logan saw the tears gathering in your eyes again, but also noticed the way you seemed to be determined not to let them fall. She doesn’t need to hold back. “And it’s bad, yes.” Logan leaned down, kissing the top of your shoulder and feeling the heat of your skin against his lips. “But it’s so much better than it was when I found you.” He moved his lips, glancing at the mirror and seeing that you were watching him instead of yourself. Good. “Blisters are going down, and there are…” He sighed, fingers trailing down over the back of your shoulder, mouth pressed gently against your collarbone. “There are already places where I can see the skin peeling, which means it’s healing.” 

 Your shocked gasp was a welcome surprise and Logan took the opportunity to put his hands on your hips, turning you to face him. “Are you serious?” He nodded, standing up straight, and circled his thumbs over your skin, waiting. “But it’s only been…”

 “Couple days, yeah.” Logan felt himself smiling. “That gel? The bandages? More Delos. We can do a lot superficially. I was shocked too.” He swallowed, raising one hand to your cheek. “Not about you, but with me… and even though I was much more out of it when they found me, and when I woke up?” Logan paused, thinking. “It was like magic, and we’ve learned so much since then.” He kissed his way across your chest and over to the injured shoulder, wrinkling his nose as he laid his lips there, too. I wish I could fix this. “So it’s bad, yeah.” He straightened up, looking straight into your eyes. “But it’s getting better. And so will you.” And I’ll be right there with you. Logan watched as you contemplated his words for long moments, and then, just when he was about to speak again, you smiled, letting out a long, slow exhale. 

 “I will.” Logan let out his breath too, pressing his forehead against yours. “I need to take those pills they gave me, Logan, and I want to lay down, I’m exhausted.” Of course you do. 

 “Yeah, so.” He cleared his throat. “You um, don’t have anything to sleep in.” Your eyes widened and you bit back a laugh as he continued. “So you’re gonna wear my sweats, and we’re not gonna worry about a shirt, ok?” He pulled away, bending down and helping you into the pants, feeling your hand on his shoulder for balance as he pulled them up, settling them low on your waist. “I grabbed you a robe if you want to… since it’s cold in the room.” You allowed him to help you into the robe one arm at a time, starting with the arm he carefully removed from the sling, and before too long, you’d brushed your teeth and climbed into bed next to him, Logan wearing only another pair of underwear and you with a bare strip of skin visible between the two sides of the untied robe. Without speaking, you shifted, moving closer to him and waiting, and before he could talk himself out of it, Logan reached out to you, drawing you closer to his body. As close as possible. 

 Finally settled a minute later, he was leaning against the headboard and you were leaning against him, Logan’s arms around you from behind and his hands resting lightly over the bandage on your stomach, one thumb swiping gently above it. This is perfect. “This can’t be comfortable for you, Logan, I’m sorry, I -” 

 “Look.” He clenched his jaw as he thought about what he wanted to say, and finally settled on the truth - in as few words possible. “I’ll sleep like this with you every single night until you’re better if you let me. I need to feel you here, with me, against me, because it’s a reminder that you…” Logan swore. “Tell me you’re uncomfortable and we’ll… but I’m right where I want to be.” The room went quiet, and then you pulled yourself out of Logan’s arms - and he felt his heart sink. Where is she going? But you didn’t go far, turning and kneeling over his lap and leaning in, raising your arm to touch his face. “What are you doing, that’s your-”

 “I don’t care.” Your voice quiet, you kissed him, Logan fighting to keep his hands off of you. I’ll hurt her, I can’t, I… “Logan.” It was only one word, but he heard everything in it - gratitude, relief, desire, reverence - and he acted, sliding one hand around to your back beneath the robe, the other tangling in your still damp hair. “I need this as much as you do,” you breathed, lips moving against his. “Need you.” He nodded quickly, tilting his head to the side and took over, kissing you like he’d wanted to for the previous few days - deep and slow, feeling your body melt toward his, though he knew it likely caused you pain. You sighed without breaking the kiss, and Logan felt your nails against his cheek, hand moving back toward his hair. No, she can’t, she can’t raise her arm that high. He pulled away suddenly, breathing hard, and you whined out his name. “Where are you going, I -”

 “Can’t get too carried away, you’re…” Fuck. “As much as I want to keep this up, unless we stop now, I’ll hurt you.” He tugged your hair gently, drawing your attention. “And I won’t do that. Ever.” You contemplated his words for long moments, Logan watching closely as you straightened your shoulders before looking back at him, the look in your eyes one of certainty. 

 “I love you, Logan.” It was only the second time he’d heard you say it to him, and he realized that he’d been waiting to hear it again, wanting to see what it sounded like when you weren’t reacting, when it came from you. “So much, and…” You pulled your hand back, and Logan continued to cradle the back of your head, waiting. “I’m sorry I thought you were just feeling guilt or pity or… shit.” You sniffed, chewing on your lip. “You don’t do that, I was just…giving you an out, and -”

 “Don’t need one.” He kissed you again. “Don’t want one.” Logan’s teeth closed gently on your lower lip and he heard you whimper quietly, but it wasn’t in pain, and he groaned as he reluctantly pulled away. Not the time, Delos. “And when you’re feeling better and we’re back home?” Logan eased you off of his lap and pulled you back against his chest, feeling you relax against him. “I’ll prove it to you.” 

 “Can’t wait.”  Home? Did he mean LA, or…  You kissed his chest, palm of your hand flat against his abdomen. “Goodnight, Logan.”

--- 

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[something-tofightfor]

Ransom - two

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (Ink AU)

Word Count: 7834

Rating: NSFW (Talk of kidnapping, actual kidnapping, language, violence, physical abuse of a female, death)

Trigger Warnings: Kidnapping, physical abuse

Author’s Note:  I debated on whether or not to go dark with this one, but I needed to in order to truly set the tone. You’ve been adequately warned, and it’s not my fault if you choose to ignore the warning or the tags and you read something you don’t like. 

Summary: You’ve been taken... but by who? Will Logan figure it out - and can he find a way to get to you in time? 

Though you didn’t appreciate the way the Host’s chest was pressed to your back, or the way it felt to have his arms settled against your sides as he held the horse’s reins, you tolerated it. It’s part of the narrative, meant to keep me off guard, focused on that instead of… “You know where we’re goin’?” He leaned in, speaking into your ear. “Boss is lookin’ forward to having a conversation with you.” That… You frowned, eyes darting over to where the second man was, his horse a few yards ahead and to the left of you. “Lost Spring’s a great place to go, ain’t it?” 

 “Yeah, it was…” You swallowed, shaking your head and glancing down at your bound hands. “I like it.” You took a deep breath, chewing on your lower lip. Get him talking, you want to learn more about this narrative, you need to… “So, aren’t there usually three of you? Sheriff told me…”

 “Three? Nah. It’s just me an’ O’Conner over there.” He gestured with one hand, and your frown deepened. “We work alone, ‘seasier that way.” He must have been wrong when he told me, but… 

 “And the horses? He said that you guys always have gray -”

 “This has been my horse since we robbed that rancher in Sweetwater couplea months ago, and that one’s been O’Conner’s since the same night.” Sweetwater? But the … The Abernathys? There’s not supposed to be a connection, these are new Hosts. You felt uneasy, but maybe the Sheriff had fed you incorrect information, maybe it was meant to not make it as easy to be rescued. Logan will find me. 

 “How much longer do we have until we get to… wait, what’s your name?” You turned your head to the side, teeth digging into your lip. “Gotta know what to call you, right?” The man stayed quiet, so you continued. “We’ve been riding for hours, and I don’t -”

 “Tanner. You can call me Tanner.” He sighed, flicking his wrists and urging the horse faster. “An’ we’ve got a couple hours til we get to where we’re goin’.” Couple hours? That doesn’t make sense. You scanned the horizon, eyes moving without turning your head. We’re not going into the hills, we’re going… You glanced up, looking for the sun, and finding it behind you. That’s wrong, it should be overhead or to the left, it… we’re going into the desert. Heart beating faster, you stayed quiet, but you were no longer at ease. What did I get myself into? 

 --- 

 Two hours later, you were still keeping pace with the sun, and if your memory served you correctly, you were headed for the Lowlands, toward the sea. What’s this way? There’s no way the Lost Springs Sheriff would come out here, this isn’t… Tanner had sidled up with O’Conner, the two men talking quietly, and though you tried to listen, you were focused on the way the sun was beating down on you, your bare shoulders on fire. I wish I had my hat. You’d thought that you and Logan would go back to your room before the narrative started, giving you a chance to pick it up, but things had happened quickly, and you’d been taken without anything covering your head. I’m going to be so burned. “We’re stoppin’ for a minute.” Tanner spoke again, pulling his horse away from the other man. “Gonna let you use the facilities if you need to before we finish this.” Finish? But you were grateful for the break, grateful to get off of the horse and stretch your legs, even if only for a few minutes. 

 “Thank you.” As your feet his the sand, you groaned, closing your eyes. “You don’t have any w-” 

 “Don’t test your luck.” Tanner was unwinding the rope from your wrists, undoing one of the knots that Logan had tied to give you use of one hand. “I’ll give you enough slack to go into that grass over there, but if you try anythin’, I’ll shoot you in the foot.” Inhaling sharply, you nodded before you moved. “Go.” You stepped quickly away from the man, though once you reached the end of the rope’s length, he followed. At least he’s giving me that, even though he said he… You thought as you squatted down, the grass reaching your shoulders, trying to come up with a solution. Though the two men hadn’t said much else to you, you knew that you hadn’t been abducted by the Hosts that you were supposed to have been taken by, which meant that someone had taken you purposely. But who? No one knows I’m here, and… I’m no one. 

 You would have understood if they’d taken Logan, but you? It didn’t make sense. I could take one of them down. They’re Hosts, even if they shoot at me, it won’t… But you knew that it would hurt, and if both of them shot at you at once, you’d go down to the ground, letting the other get to you. You had no weapon, no way of defending yourself aside from your hands, and you were in the middle of nowhere. Tanner called out to you and you popped your head up, letting him see that you were still where he wanted you, and then as you stood up, buttoning your pants, he pulled the rope roughly, leading you back to him. He switched places with O’Conner, and while Tanner turned away to relieve himself, you studied the second man. “You don’t talk much.” I need to figure out who sent them and why. “Tanner said -”

 “Tanner knows what’s good for him, he won’t keep talkin’ to you, little lady.” The second man’s voice was low and slightly more threatening, even though his build was smaller. “We just gotta get you to the Boss and then you won’t -”

 “McCray?” You stepped forward, eyes widening. Maybe. Maybe I was wrong. “You gotta get me to McCray?” Silent for a few seconds, O’Conner stared at you and then laughed, the sound harsh in your ears. 

 “Ghost? Nah. We wouldn’t give you over to him, he’d try an’ keep you for himself. Boss has somethin’ different planned for you.” Different? What… “He said he could give us whatever we wanted ‘s long as we made sure he gotcha.” Tanner reappeared, and you watched as he glanced upward, looking at the sun. 

 “Time to go. We’re supposed to be back at the campsite before dark, and we’re barely gonna make it as it is.” He looked at you, one eyebrow raised beneath the brim of his hat. “If I leave your hand free so you can hold on better, you gonna give me trouble?” You weighed your options quickly, looking between the two men, and realized that you were indeed at their mercy. I need to figure out who these people are before I … 

 “I won’t.” You swallowed, throat dry. “You sure I can’t have some water, though? I’ve been sitting in the sun and -”

 “You’ll get water when we get to the campsite if he wants to give it to you.” Tanner pulled on the rope and you stumbled after him, swearing under your breath. “Just get back on the horse.” You did, hoisting yourself up and onto the saddle, hands going back around the knob in front of you. You felt him settle behind you again, knees digging in against your thighs as you started moving. “You have no idea what you’re in for, do you?” No, I don’t… I… “You’ll know soon enough.” 

 --- 

 The sun was starting to sink ahead of you by the time Tanner slowed the horse down, a series of low whistles leaving his lips. After a few seconds, an answering whistle carried to your ears, and Tanner signaled O’Conner forward, the horses moving faster. Someone’s there. You broke through a small strand of trees, catching sight of a single figure sitting with his back to you, a small fire in front of him. “Is that -” You closed your eyes swallowing hard. “I -” They can’t hurt you. They can’t hurt you, they’re Hosts, they can’t do anything worse to you then they already have, they… 

 “It is.” Tanner was leaning forward again, talking quietly into your ear. “And we got you here early, so he’s gonna be happy.” The horses stopped moving, and Tanner cleared his throat, unwinding the rope again and tossing it forward. You’d stopped again, Tanner retying your wrists together so that when you arrived to their boss, you had no possibility of getting free, so the length was shorter, but it still reached halfway to the seated man, the knotted end resting on the ground in short grass and a few sticks. In the silence between you, there was only the crackling of the fire and the soft whinnying of the horses, but then Tanner spoke after clearing his throat. “Got her here to you, Boss.” He leaned in again, speaking to you. “Don’t move.” You nodded once, still wanting to see where things were headed, and felt the man dismount from behind you, though he didn’t step away from the horse. 

 As O’Conner moved to the ground, too, you looked between the three men, the new one still seated and facing away from you, staring at the fire. Maybe I can run, maybe I can get a gun, it’s getting dark, and… But then the third man stood and slowly turned to face you, and your blood ran cold, all thoughts of escape disappearing. “W… William?” What is he doing here? “Y-you -” The man took three steps toward you, his eyes focused on your face before he bent down, picking up the end of the rope and closing his fingers around it above the knot. As he stood back up, you watched as he smiled at you from beneath the wide black brim of his hat. He kidnapped Logan and now he’s got me.

 “Surprise.” As he said the word, he yanked on the rope, and because you were caught off guard, you tumbled off of the horse, barely able to brace your fall with your forearms, and unable to keep your head and elbow from knocking against the ground. What the fuck? “You know,” William said as he pulled you across the ground by the rope, your bare arms scraping against the underbrush as you moved, head spinning and your feet dragging behind you. “This was the perfect opportunity, you coming here to catalog this new narrative, Logan having to stay behind…” He doesn’t know Logan’s here. You widened your eyes but didn’t say anything, staring up at William through watering eyes. Do not cry. “Bet I’m the last person you thought you’d see here, hmm?” William knelt next to you, finally removing his hat and setting it on the ground next to him, his hair hanging over his eyes. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell you all about why I’m here and why you’re here. We’ve got a lot to talk about.” He leaned in, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, one hand reaching out to touch your cheek, but there was no warmth in it. “Tanner.” William looked up, fingers still on your face. “When you took her, who saw? Was she wearin’ her hat when you grabbed her?” 

 “Ah, Boss, she was on the street in Lost Spring, like you said she’d be, walkin’ back from breakfast.” Your eyes moved to Tanner, and you noticed that he looked a little worried, one of his hands rubbing at the back of his neck. “She was with a man, dark hair, all in black, real handsome. No hat.” You heard Willam swear, and though Tanner continued, the blonde man’s attention was back on you, his lips pressed together. 

 “So he is here, and he knows you got taken.” William cocked his head to the side, stroking down your cheek and to your neck with the pads of his fingers, nothing gentle about it. “Wonder how long it’ll take him to realize that you’re not where you’re supposed to be.” He probably already has, it’s been hours, he would have gone to the Sheriff, he… But why would he, you thought as you stared up at William. O’Conner said not to come til sundown, so if Logan waited, he won’t… and we’re not in the hills, he’ll never find me… “You’re figurin’ it out, aren’t you?” William grinned, his fingers closing around your shoulder. “I’m doing to him what he did to me, except …” William sucked air in between his teeth, shaking his head. “Except they can’t rebuild you.” What the fuck is he talking about? “Now.” He settled down onto both knees next to you, removing his hand from your skin and reaching into his pocket. “I figure, at the very least we have abut two days before he even comes close.” William pulled out a handkerchief and a small bottle. “And I think this first part will go much faster if you’re not awake, don’t you?” 

 “No, William, I -” You watched as he tilted the bottle over and onto the cloth, shaking your head back and forth. “Whatever that is, you don’t need to, it’s fine, I won’t…” But William only laughed, setting the bottle down and pulling the bandana around his neck up and over his nose, leaning in over you. 

 “I don’t believe you.” He shrugged, nose wrinkling. “And I’m not ready to hurt you… yet.” You screamed once before he covered your mouth and nose with the dampened cloth, closing your eyes and not even trying to hold back your tears as William pressed down. Logan, help me. Please. The last thing you saw before you lost consciousness was his face, his words echoing in your mind. I’ll find you. I promise. 

 --- 

 He followed the Sheriff down the street, his hands jammed into his pockets. That wasn’t the right kidnapping, that wasn’t … she… “We have to ride out after her, we have to…” Logan could barely get the words out. “She got taken, and -”

 “Son, I know she did, but we’ve got our own to worry about, and only two deputies plus myself. The McCray gang took Marilee, we’ve gotta go after her and…” They have to help her, they can’t just… 

 “No. You have to go after…” Logan groaned in frustration, hands moving to his hair. “You know where Marilee will be, but my… she got… you have to…” The man sighed, looking up at Logan from behind his table. 

 “You can see if any of the townsfolk will ride out with you and look for your woman, son, but -”

 “My name is Logan Delos!” Logan slammed his hand on the table, shaking his head back and forth in anger. “And I need you to help me, now because the woman I…” He swallowed, taking a breath. “I don’t know this area, I don’t know where to…” I don’t know where to look. 

 “Do you have any enemies? Does she?” The Sheriff leaned back in his chair, one hand stroking his beard. “Maybe it was a kidnapping, and there’ll be a ransom note. Someone might want something -”

 “We don’t know anyone here, we just got here yesterday, we…” Logan’s eyes widened, one hand going up to his face. “We barely left the room, and…” He shook his head. “There’s no one.” But there is one person. He took a breath. “Unless…” Logan snapped his fingers, tapping the tabletop. “I need a map, I need…” He shook his head. “I’ll be back.” Without another word, Logan turned and left the Sheriff’s station, nearly sprinting back to the saloon. What room? What… “Hey.” He stopped at the mail counter, the young woman behind it eyeing him intently. Not fucking now. “Yesterday, a… a woman and a man came here, rented rooms.” He paused, licking his lips nervously. “She had tattoos on her back and shoulders, and he would have been… blonde, probably about my height… I just need to know what room he was in, he’s my sister’s husband and…” The girl smiled, reaching beneath the counter and pulling out a logbook, one finger moving down the page. 

 Logan saw your name and then William’s, and he felt his heart beating faster. “He was in room four, but it looks like he checked out yesterday evenin’, says there’s a …” She turned away, reaching back into one of the mail slots. “Left a letter for a Logan?” He did? She held out a small envelope, the smile on her face returning. “You Logan?” Logan nodded, hand reaching out for the paper and sliding his finger beneath the back side and tearing it open. There was a single sheet of paper inside, folded around a small object, and as Logan shook it out into his hand, he felt himself freeze. “What’s it say?” The Host behind the counter leaned forward, but Logan couldn’t respond, his eyes locked on the paper and the circular disc in his other hand. Motherfucker. “Good luck?” She laughed. “Good luck with what?”

 “What is this?” Though he knew what it was, Logan held up the metal, finally speaking again. “What is it?” Biting her lip, the woman shook her head, green eyes moving up to Logan’s dark ones. 

 “I don’t know, Logan. Doesn’t look like anything to me.” 

--- 

 Fifteen minutes later, Logan had gone back to the room, grabbing his hat and yours before going to the general store and buying two canteens, filling them both with water, and stocking up on a second pistol and extra ammo. Won’t do any good on William, but the Hosts… He led his horse out of the stables and down the main street, eyes landing on people one after the other. I can’t ask them for help, this is personal, this is… “Hey!” He stopped, raising his voice and turning in a slow circle, hoping that someone that saw him was one of the people that had been present earlier. Please. “I was with a woman earlier, and she got taken.” He reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. “I’ve got $100 for anyone that can tell me anything about those men or those horses, or -” He pulled the bills out, holding them in the air. “One hundred dollars cash to anyone that can help me get her back.” He stopped, waiting, and as Logan gulped in air, he closed his eyes. She’s gotta be ok, he won’t… 

 “Mister?” Eyes snapping open, Logan turned toward the sound of the voice, seeing that a young man had stepped off of the porch of one of the stores. “I don’t know who those men were, but the horses? They had a brand on ‘em.” His eyes went to the money and then back to Logan. “Didn’t see it up close, but it looked like… like the Abernathy brand.” Dolores? Fucking Dolores? “From Sweetwater? Those horses are some of the finest around, and they reported a couple missin’ a few months ago.” The man stepped closer again, voice stronger. “If it’s the same men, I heard that they robbed a couple places down near Las Mudas and the old plantation.” That helps. Logan let out a breath, lowering his head. “I can show you on a map if you want, I know you’re a newcomer, so…”

 “Thank you.” The two words spoken with a gratitude he didn’t know he was capable of, Logan stepped forward and toward the man, handing over the money. “You’re tellin’ the truth, right?” The man nodded. “Not just doing it for the m-”

 “Of course not.” The man shook his head, folding the bills and sticking them in his pocket. “I can use it, sure, but I wouldn’t lie about somethin’ like this when a woman’s been taken.” Oh, thank fuck. Logan reached into his pocket and pulled the map that the Sheriff had given him out, and for the next few minutes, he stood in the street, the man explaining where things were located, where likely hiding spots were. “There’s not much to the west, and unless you go far south first, all that’s north is mountains and cliffs, and they’re damn near impossible to get up.” So he went south. Logan’s eyes moved over the map, and though he knew it was unlikely, they traveled southeast to the unclaimed territories, to where William had set him off into the sunset. He wouldn’t do that again, he tried it once, and it didn’t work, he knows that’d be the first place I’d look. 

 “Thank you.” He met the young man’s eyes again, and Logan hoped that he could tell how grateful he was. “I didn’t even know where to start, and now I…” He nodded, pointing. “I’ll head down to Las Mudas, and then see what they have to say.” Maybe they’ll have names, then I can… Logan took a deep breath. 

 “You’ll find her.” The man smiled at him, nodding twice. “Go.” He mounted his horse, turning it around and riding out of town. He said it’s about a day’s ride to Las Mudas… I’m gonna make it in half that. 

 --- 

 You woke up when it was fully dark out, head pounding and throat dry. What the fuck? You were on the back of another horse, but this time, you weren’t sitting up on your own, you were strapped to the saddle, stomach pressed against it and your body bouncing with every step the animal took. Oh my god, I’m going to puke, I… Even as you had the thought, you felt your stomach seizing, and the next thing you knew you were getting sick, barely able to lift your head in order to make sure you didn’t cover your arms in vomit. At least my hair���s still tied back. Still coughing violently, you tried to look around, but couldn’t lift your head for too long because of the pounding. He fucking chloroformed me, how is that legal, how… There had been incidents in the park before, you knew, where guests like William had tried to harm other guests, and that was why Delos had implemented the Guest Tracking System, allowing people to alert security through the device if they ever felt that they were truly in danger. But your hat was back in your room, which meant that you didn’t have your device, and though William had his hat, you knew you’d never get to it to press down on the hidden button. Maybe… But you also knew that keeping you disoriented was part of William’s plan, and while it wouldn’t make you any less angry, it would make you more manageable. But why is he… because of Logan? 

 Your mind went back to the conversation you’d had the night Logan got his tattoo - when he’d told you what happened with William. You knew that Logan and William’s first trip to the park together had ended badly, and you knew that it was bad enough that Logan didn’t talk about it to anyone else, but you didn’t know why William would have taken you to prove a point. I didn’t do anything, Logan told me not to worry about it, he... From your position on the horse, it was difficult for you to tell what direction you were moving in, or even what time it was. I need water. I need food, I need… But you knew that William wouldn’t give you any of those things, and if he let you off of the horse at all, it would be a shock. “W-william.” Your throat scratchy, you gritted your teeth and tried again. “William.” After a few seconds, the horse you were on stopped moving, and you heard footsteps on the ground heading toward you. 

 “Yes?” He spoke from right next to you, voice low. “Welcome back, Sleeping Beauty.” Determined not to do anything to piss him off, you attempted to raise your head, trying to meet his eyes. 

 “I’m dizzy, William.” It came out as a whine, and you couldn’t help it. “I need to sit up, I can hold on, I -” I need to see where I am. “Please, William, where am I going to go?” You knew that you looked, smelled and sounded terrible, but you needed to get through to him. “Let me sit up, William, I -”

 “Fine. But if you try anything, I’ll -” He gripped your chin in one hand, fingers closing tight against it and forcing you to look up. “You won’t get a second chance.” You could hear that he meant it, and though you knew that the gun at his waist wouldn’t harm you, you were sure that he had another plan. You nodded weakly, and only a few seconds later, felt the binding on your arms getting looser. “If I pull you off of there, are you gonna be able to get back on?” 

 “I think so.” You swallowed, and then William pulled you forward, this time not letting you fall to the ground before you got your footing. “Thank you.” The words slipped out before you could stop them, but you were so happy to be standing on solid ground that you couldn’t help it, and William actually laughed from next to you, his grip on your elbow tight. That’s going to bruise. “Give me a second, please.” You lowered your head, staring at your feet and trying to take deep breaths to clear your mind. Get it together. You finally raised your head and looked around, surprised to see that only one of the men - Tanner - was still with you. Where’s O’Conner? Turning your head, you saw that the horse you were riding was the one that the second man had been on. What happened to him? 

 “Our friend O’Conner’s no longer with us.” William was whispering, mouth close to your ear. “Had to get you a horse somehow.” Your lip curled, but you didn’t respond. “Get on, we need to go.” It was difficult but you managed to get back onto your horse, and soon the three of you were back on track, making your way over the flatlands, the moon shining brightly above you. So we went south. We’re not near the hills anymore. The hours passed and finally, when you were so exhausted that you thought you’d fall off the horse, William allowed you to stop just as the sky was beginning to lighten, the three of you setting up camp beneath a few scrubby trees. Even as he tied you to the trunk, allowing only a little play in the rope so that you could halfway stretch out, you were thankful for the respite, for the chance to close your eyes. “Enjoy this sleep, because tomorrow, the fun starts.” 

 --- 

 You woke up to the buzzing of flies, and as you attempted to use your hands to wave them away, you were reminded of your predicament. I’m tied to a fucking tree. Eyes opening all the way, you struggled into an upright position, lifting your hands as much as you possibly could, drawing your knees up toward your chest. What the fuck am I going to do? You looked over the camp, seeing that William was nowhere to be found, Tanner leaning against his bedroll and staring up at the sky. “You can stop strugglin’ now, you aren’t goin anywhere. Boss tied those knots well, an’ he knows what he’s doing.” You swallowed, deciding that you were going to try speaking, even though you didn’t know how your voice would sound. 

 “How long have you known him? William, I mean?” Throat scratchy, you winced. “You said you’ve had the horses for a couple months, and…” 

 “They met me the night I helped ‘em rob the Abernathys.” William spoke from behind you and you closed your eyes. No. I needed more time, I… “I find myself out on that farm most trips to the park, you know.” William appeared in front of you, glancing over his shoulder. “Take a walk, Tanner. I need to talk to her for a while.” The Host stood, leaning down to pick up his canteen before he walked off. That doesn’t make sense, they aren’t supposed to be that obedient, it would ruin the game, they… “Anyway.” William settled down on the ground in front of you, legs crossed and canteen on his lap. “We’re gonna have a conversation, and if you give me the answers I want, I’ll give you something to drink.” It had been more than 24 hours since your last drink, and your tongue was still coated with the taste of your vomit - water sounded like the answer to everything. What do you want, asshole?

 “I don’t know what you want to hear, William, I -” You shook your head, closing your eyes. “Why are you doing this, what -”

 “The first time I came to this place, it was supposed to be a bonding trip between me and Logan. He was going to be my brother in law, and Jules… she wanted us to get to know each other better. I’d heard stories about the park, stories about... “ William shook his head. “L… he promised me that after the trip, I’d know who I was, and he said he wanted to meet that person, wanted to see what I was really like.” That doesn’t sound bad, it’s what he told me, too… “But he just wanted me to do what he wanted to do - fuck and drink and kill, and when I finally…” William laughed, looking into your eyes. “When I finally played the game how he wanted me to, the war and the plotting, and the … he didn’t like it much.” 

 “William, I don’t -” You coughed, trying to sit up straighter and also trying not to drag the burned skin of your shoulders against the tree bark. Play this off. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

 “But you do, because…” William leaned in, eyes cold. “He’s getting closer, he’s up to something, and he wouldn’t tell anyone else, only you.” What? “What has Logan fucking Delos told you about what happened here and what he’s doing now?” You shook your head, hearing his tone of voice - unlike you’d ever heard it previously. What is wrong with him? I don’t… “Tell me!” William moved forward, fingers closing around your shoulder and shoving you backward, slamming your back into the tree trunk. “Tell me what that piece of shit told you about me.”

 “He didn’t tell me anything, William!” You screamed the words without thinking, your arm throbbing where he was gripping it. “He just told me that it didn’t end well, and he ended up in the desert and they didn’t find him for days, but…” William’s grip loosened slightly, his hand sliding down toward your elbow. “He only said that the two of you didn’t really get along, and that the trip was…” You closed your eyes, trying to remember the word Logan had used. “Illuminating.” You opened your eyes again, not wanting to but forcing yourself to look at William. “He told me about the drugs and the sex and the alcohol after he came back, because no one believed him, how he didn’t want to feel anything, and how he almost offed himself multiple times, but he doesn’t talk about you, William. Not to me, not unless we’ll be seeing you and Juliet and Emily.” You gritted your teeth. “But now I’m…” Shit. Shut up. “He doesn’t talk to me about you, William, we’re together, but we don’t…” It was a lie, and both of you knew it. He was protecting me. He didn’t want me to be involved, that’s why he never… “I don’t know anything else, William, I don’t, I …” You lowered your head, fighting back the tears that were threatening. “I’m so thirsty, I…” What is Logan doing? What does William know?

 “Now you’re what?” His voice low, William leaned in, lips again close to your ear. “What have you figured out, hmm?” He laughed, fingers tightening again. “Tell me now.” Lie. You could almost hear Logan whispering into your ear. Lie to him. Make it convincing. “I’m waiting.” 

 “Now, William, I’m thinking that there’s a lot more to you than…” You swallowed, closing your eyes. “More to you than people know.” It wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t what you were thinking, either. You sent him out into that desert. You tried to kill him. You… 

 “You know what?” He let go of your arm, sitting back and staring at you again. “You’re right about that.” He reached over, picking up the canteen that was sitting next to him and unscrewed the top. “And you’re going to find out just how right you are soon.” He leaned forward the canteen in one hand. “Open your mouth.” Eyes flying all the way open you pulled away from the tree and tilted your head back, doing as he asked. Thank God. You felt the cool metal touch your lips and then William tilted the canteen up. Gulping, you managed to swallow twice before you coughed, shaking your head violently back and forth. What… whiskey? What the … Coughing harder, you didn’t pay any mind to the fact that William was emptying the remainder of the canteen onto your face and chest, letting the whiskey soak your skin and clothing. “It’s his favorite, so I thought you’d want to have some.” You turned your head to spit, trying not to start screaming at him, because you knew it wouldn’t do any good. 

 “What are you going to do with me, William?” Finally catching your breath, you looked up at him, swallowing before you squeezed your eyes shut for a few seconds. “You’re not going to give me water, not going to…” You coughed again. “Not going to give me food, I’m sure. I didn’t have a blanket, so…” You smiled at him, wrinkling your nose. “You going to nearly kill me and then find me, William? Make yourself look like the hero, so if Logan ever says anything, he’ll look like an asshole?” William shifted onto one knee and paused, squinting at you before he answered. 

 “Nah. Logan’s going to be the one that finds you. But when? How? What condition you’re in?” The man laughed, head shaking back and forth. “That I haven’t decided yet.” He stood, one hand on his hip. “The thing about Westworld is that you can’t take anything out of here, not really. So no matter what, there’s no proof. And…” He pulled his hat off, turning it over so that you could see the inside of the brim. “These trackers are so handy, aren’t they?” William ran his fingers over a small tear on the inside of the hat, shaking his head. “That’s why I took mine out and left it at that saloon. I’m sure Logan’s found it by now, so he knows that I have you, and he knows he can’t just call into security and track me.” Dick. He paced in front of you, and you heard genuine giddiness in his voice, even though your head was spinning from the combination of the sun, lack of sleep, the fall you’d taken and the whiskey you’d swallowed. This isn’t good. “You don’t have a tracker on you, and when I picked those two idiots? I made sure he’d never had any contact with them before, so he won’t know who they are to… Hey.” He stepped back toward you, reaching down and grabbing the shoulder strap of your vest, yanking you toward him, the rope biting into your wrists. “Listen to me.” 

 “I’m listening, William.” You were, it wasn’t a lie, but you couldn’t muster up the enthusiasm you were sure he wanted. “I hear you, loud and -” Your words were stopped by the sting of the back of William’s hand as it made contact with your cheek, your head whipping to the side. Crying out, you struggled to raise your arms to protect your face, but the rope stopped you, the knots digging deeper into your wrists as you tugged, the tears finally falling freely. “What do you want from me, William? What?”

 “I want you to tell me the truth, you miserable little bitch.” William slapped you again, laughing as he stepped away from you. “You will. Maybe not right now, but … soon. You’ll tell me what you know, and then I’ll know exactly how to stop him. I’ll know what I need to make him quit.” William turned and walked away from you and you slumped back against the tree, shoulders shaking. He already wants you gone, William, and this is just going to make it worse. 

 --- 

 He’d ridden out of Lost Spring and down to Las Mudas as fast as his horse would allow him to, and when the animal had tired, Logan leaned down, whispering one of the fail safe commands into its ear, returning it to full strength. Convenient. The initiative had been implemented after Logan’s own trip to the edges of the park, and worked on all Hosts - animal and human alike. Some commands would just give them extra energy, others would alert the Mesa security team to an exact location. Though it wasn’t common knowledge and was still in the process of being beta tested - “We can’t ruin the illusion, Ford had said with a single shake of his head. “We give technicians the codes, that’s one thing, but Guests? No.” “Fuck you, Ford.” Logan gritted his teeth, eyes on the horizon in the gathering twilight. “She could have…” But Logan knew that you wouldn’t have used it until it was too late, still determined to do your job, and if William was involved, he wouldn’t allow you to use the words. I’m going to fucking kill you, William. 

 As the sun rose in the early hours of the next morning, Logan finally rode into town. He scanned the people milling around in the early morning twilight, trying to get a feel for the place with exhausted eyes. It wasn’t somewhere that he’d spent a great deal of time previously, so he didn’t know where to begin. The law, start there, this place has to have some sort of… “I need the Sheriff.” He stopped in front of the saloon, still on his horse. “I need to talk to him about the robberies, the men with the black horses.” Two of the women standing on the steps pointed in unison, and a few minutes later, Logan had dismounted and was sitting in a small room, his hands folded on the tabletop in front of him as he explained what he was looking for. 

 “Look, Mr. Delos.” The young Sheriff was shaking his head. “I’ll tell you what I know, but it’ll take me some time. Why don’t you let me get you somethin’ to eat, let us feed your horse, take a few hours to get some rest.”

 “No.” He shook his head. “No, I’ll accept the food and the information, but I can’t wait a few hours, she doesn’t have them.” He was sure of that, sure that any delay from him would put you in more danger. “The men that took her might just be thieves, but the one they’re taking her to?” Logan sighed. “He’s bad news.” Faster than expected, Logan had a hot meal in front of him, the lawman talking about the bandits that had been in the area. 

 “Never hurt anyone, but they’ve done some damage. Stole a bunch of silver, killed a few cows and some sheep, took the horses.” Sounds run of the mill for these parts, but it doesn’t make sense that they’d be with William. Why? “They’ve been in and out of the area between here and Pariah and Sweetwater, never stayin’ in one place. Pariah’s one thing; lawlessness there is how they operate, but here? Here we -”

 “Alright, but do you know who they are?” Logan chewed and swallowed, wondering if William was feeding you, what he was saying to you. “Names? Nicknames? Where they’re from? What they might want?” The man leaned back in his chair, thinking. 

 “Nah, they’re just like Hector Escaton’s posse, tryin’ to cause trouble when and where they can, but…” The Sheriff sighed. “Think one of em’s name is O’Conner, he fits the description of a man from down near Avalon, the other one we don’t know, and it’s why we ain’t caught ‘em yet.” Of course it is. He rubbed the heels of his hands over his eyes, thinking of the way you were likely feeling and hoped you still thought he was coming. I am, I’m just figuring it out. I swear… “My best guess? They takin’ her to meet someone, they prob’ly headed south from where you all were, and then they headed…” He squinted, lips pressed together. “Toward the canyons.” No he wouldn’t take her there, he wouldn’t repeat it, that’s not it. “Could also be headin’ toward the sea, that’s a shorter trip, but there are fewer places to hide on the way, unless they’re followin’ the river.” He leaned forward, pointing on the map. “If it was me, an’ I was tryin’ to get somewhere quick?” He tapped a finger on the map where the rivers converged between the lowlands and the old plantation fields. “I’d stick to the river, cuz it’s easier to follow it straight to the end. The edge of the park. I’ve seen it, but he hasn’t. He’d want to see … 

 “Thank you.” Logan shook his head, deciding what he was going to do. “I’ll follow the river west, see what that turns up, there’s people out near the plantation that might be able to…” Wait a minute. I don’t have to ...

 “Sure are. Lots of ‘em, but a lot of ‘em don’t speak English, so you’ll have to find someone that…” He laughed. “That can talk to you.” The man pushed back from the table, glancing at the watch he pulled from his pocket. “You look exhausted, are you sure that you -”

 “No. I have to go, I can’t wait.” Logan stood, reaching a hand out to the other man. “I appreciate your help more than you know, but I need two more things from you, and then I’ll be on my way.” The Sheriff nodded, gesturing at Logan with one hand. “I need a pair of handcuffs, and I need you to show me the yellow brick road.” Please work. He swallowed, waiting, but after only a few seconds, the man turned away from Logan, stepping further into the room and spinning the dial on the safe behind him on the wall. 

 “I’ll leave you now.” No more accent, no more … shit. He’d never seen the Hosts affectless, and the first time would have been much more interesting if your life hadn’t been on the line. Logan stepped past the Sheriff as the man placed a set of cuffs on the desk and reached into the safe, pulling out the bagged items from inside. They were standard issue first aid items - bandages, over the counter painkillers, alcohol wipes - and, Logan saw, relief flooding his body, an EPI pen along with a few vials of liquid that were marked “adrenaline” along with a jet injector. Perfect. He slung the small pouch over his shoulder and then reached in again, picking up the final item in the safe: one of the tablets the behavior analysts used. Alright, Delos. Find her. Logan returned to the table, sitting down, and after logging in, he was able to access the park map, and in turn, all of the Host and Guest locations, tiny moving dots on the illuminated screen. 

 He knew it wasn’t worth a damn, but he quickly typed your name in anyway, closing his eyes when your location came up less than fifteen yards from him. I wish. He typed in William’s name, too, but that one was literally on top of him, and Logan thought of the tracking device he’d stuffed into his pocket, lip curling into a snarl. Look up O’Conner. He did so, limiting the results to Hosts, and was surprised to see that there were two of them, one showing up as being in the Ranchlands to the east, and the other’s marker blinking slowly nearly due north of Las Mudas. Blinking? That means…. He clicked on the name, bringing up a picture and was presented with the image of the man that had held the gun on him. Got you...but you’re dead? He tapped again, bringing up playback of the final moments of the Host’s life, and didn’t see much; just a fire, the second kidnapper laying next to it, and a prone body on the ground. Wait, that’s a rope, that’s her, that… Zooming in, Logan saw that your head was turned to the side, eyes closed, hands still tied together and resting against your abdomen. What did he do to her? But Logan didn’t dwell on it , instead zooming in on the second Host’s face and tapping, bringing up information on him. Tanner. Alright. That Host’s location was not blinking, and Logan breathed a sigh of relief. He’s nearly a day away, I should have… fuck, why wasn’t there a stockpile in Lost Spring? He’d tried the same code words on the Sheriff there, but there’d been no response, and though Logan knew that he simply should have immediately asked upon arrival in Las Mudas, the truth was that he needed the rest and he needed the food. I need to sleep, I need… But she needs me more, she needs help. 

 Logan stared at the screen, finger hovering over the button that he could have used to call security in. They can be to her in fifteen minutes or less, they can save her, they can… But Logan knew William, and knew that the man had given up. There was no way out of it for him after taking you and leaving evidence behind - and though Logan didn’t know if he’d actually kill you at the merest glimpse of intervention, he didn’t want to risk it. Whatever he’s got planned, he wants me to be there, wants me to see, wants me to… Logan glanced down once more before turning the tablet off and slipping it into the bag with the medical supplies, pulling out the jet injector and one of the adrenaline vials. I’m going to crash, but at least I’ll… Swallowing, Logan twisted the vial into position, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes. 

 He hadn’t injected himself with anything in nearly two years, but you were worth it, and he pressed the trigger without another thought, the release point tight against the inside of his forearm. I’ll crash hard, but at least I’ll be closer to you when it happens. Logan took a deep breath and stood, already feeling more awake and alert as the injection took hold. “I’m coming.” 

--- 

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