#wildmother being a troll

[iamonlypartlymajestic]

Everybody Talks (But Especially The Plants) - FjorClay Week Day 5: Dreams/Day 7: Nature

Fjord didn’t know where he was.

He had just finished his turn at driving the wagon, having been replaced by Caduceus. He decided to rest his eyes for a bit knowing that his friends were with him ready to wake him up at the first sign of danger.

He reopened his eyes to discover he was alone and the world out of sorts. Everything was much larger than it should be. Bushes were the size of town buildings, trees were larger than the tallest of giants, and the insects were monstrous.

It was one such mammoth bee that startled him. He attempted to summon his sword but found himself unable to move. He finally looked down at his body to see a long green stem sprout from his head and leaves for arms.

He screamed! Or rather attempted to scream, he didn’t have a literal mouth, so he just shook there in horror.

“Shhhh...it’s okay.” A deep timbre soothed him into a tranquil state. A colossal hand caressed his head gently. “You’re absolutely beautiful...What’s got you so worked up?”

The owner of the hand was quite blurry. But he felt like he knew who the being was regardless. Fjord felt safe in their hand, knowing they had saved him in the past and will continue to do so in the future.

“I’ve got you now.” The being blurred even more and a white light pierced through Fjord’s eyes.

Fjord woke up.

“Wakey, wakey, Fjord!” Jester sang and poked the half-orc hard in the face.

“Ugh! Jester! You almost poked my eye out!” Fjord rubbed at his assaulted eye, now noticing that the wagon had stopped and many of the others had already started setting up camp.

“No I didn’t!” The tiefling stuck her tongue out and leaped off the wagon with a flourish. “You must have been very tired. You were knocked out the entire rest of the way.” She went ahead to help Yasha and Caduceus get dinner ready.

After making sure he still had proper vision, he followed Beau to get some wood for the campfire. She preferred to cut the logs herself and let whoever carry what she couldn’t hold, so Fjord had some time to look at the scenery.

He noticed a patch of colorful flowers that looked out of place among all of the green. It reminded him of his dream. He walked up to the flowers and crouched down to get a closer look at its petals. Maybe Caduceus would like them.

“Do you see that guy? He looks like an asshole.”

“Nah...probably just misunderstood.”

Fjord almost fell back, startled at the voices that came from the blossoms. However, still tired from the long travel and unsettled by the unusual dream (and he’s had a lot), he glared at the flowers that were talking about him as if it was perfectly normal that flora were talking at all. These particular flowers though elegant in appearance, were unafraid of loudly voicing their rude opinions about the half-orc.

“See! Look at his face!” The taller of the two flowers seemed to be subtly wiggling its leaf towards Fjord’s unamused expression. “We’re just minding our business, doing what we do, and he’s giving us the stink-eye. Total asshole.”

Offended, the half-orc frowned even further and pointed at the plant keen on insulting him, “Hey! Now listen here. I—”

“Fjord...what the hell are you doing?” Beau paused in the middle of swinging her axe. “You’re acting like Caduceus. Except much less nicer.”

Fjord glanced back at the plants who apparently returned to being still and quiet. They remained still and quiet, and Beau was starting to look at him as if he was crazy. The half-orc shook his head, he must have been really drained out. He cleared his throat and continued picking up the logs that Beau split. “Erm. Nothing. Nevermind. Just thought I heard something.”

The monk gave him one last dubious glance before they finished the final batch of wood and headed back to the campsite.

Fjord dropped the wood in the pile next to the bonfire and dusted off his hands. He looked around the area, his eyes sweeping over his friends until he found Caduceus. The firbolg was nearby a cliff wall that made up the side of the campsite adding extra protection and cover. Fjord straightened out his clothing and walked over, eager to spend more time with the cleric especially during the small amount of downtime they had.

Caduceus had his fingers in the patch of moss that grew alongside the stone. He was murmuring as he stroked the moss’s threads. “Hello there, friend. I’ve never seen your kind before. You’re absolutely beautiful.” The firbolg’s long fingers twisted and twirled through the greenery.

Fjord admired the pink-haired firbolg completely in his habitat, surrounded by the trees and all kinds of flora, appreciating the fruits of their goddess’s blessings.

“Oh, yes! Right there...”

Fjord’s eyes sharpened at the voice that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. He readied his hand to summon his sword and surveyed the area for anything dangerous.

“That feels amazing.” The voice moaned and the half-orc whirled his head back to the patch of moss Caduceus was still innocently talking to. It continued, “Harder, please…”

Fjord’s jaw dropped and a flush began to spread from his cheeks throughout his whole body. The crass plant got worse.

“If I could, I would cover your entire body, firbolg. Every inch of your long body will be engulfed. I’d be careful at first, gentle. I’ll take my time. Make you beg for me as I slither inside and out. I’ll—”

A loud slap cracked through the evening as Fjord smacked Caduceus’s hand from the perverted moss.

Everybody turned towards the pair in shock. Fjord never did anything even close to rude to Caduceus. The firbolg cradled his poor hand, ears drooping, and eyes wide at the half-orc. Fjord was heaving, blush still very visible.

“Uh. No. I. Your hand!” Fjord gestured wildly at the firbolg’s hand and at the air conveying absolutely nothing. “Poison! I—I thought the moss. Was poisonous. So I...saved you?” The half-orc winced at his crappy excuse. Not like he could tell Caduceus the moss wanted to have sex with the firbolg...Could he?

The cleric remained quiet. Fjord shut up and went to gawk at a quite interesting piece of rock that was on the ground. Fjord could feel Caduceus peering over him critically. However, instead of voicing his concerns, the firbolg thanked him.

“Thank you for your concern, Fjord. But although I’m not familiar with this type of moss, I know it’s not harmful to me or others.” Caduceus smiled at him serenely, his ears perking up again.

“R-right. You’re welcome. S-sorry for hurting you.” Fjord relaxed a fraction, but not wanting to push his luck, immediately went for the first watch. He needed to freak out far, far away from his prying friends.

Unfortunately, away from prying friends didn’t mean away from prying literally everything else.

Fjord was able to experience a moment of silence, focused on his surroundings for any intruders. After a quick first glance that yielded nothing, the half-orc fully relaxed against the wide trunk of the tree behind him, appreciating the refreshing breeze that passed every so often.

The peace did not last for long.

“Hello!”

Dammit.

Fjord wrinkled his forehead and sighed. The greeting belonged to a young bud sprouting on the vine hanging next to his head.

“Hi! I’ve never seen someone like you before. Are you also a plant? You’re green like me!” The yellow and green bud wiggled back and forth as it spoke.

The half-orc rolled his eyes and kept stoic perfectly willing to ignore the plant for the rest of the night but the trunk he was leaning on rumbled. He yelped and jumped from his seat.

“Now, child. Leave the young man to his job.” The leaves of the tree rustled and the wood groaned low and deep. The bud whined, chagrined. The ancient tree then aimed its attention at Fjord. “Please excuse the young’un. It’s been a long while since we’ve had visitors in this area that are able to talk to us.”

Extremely hesitant, but not wanting to appear disrespectful to the probably nice elder tree, Fjord said “It’s fine. It’s just...I’ve never been able to talk to plants before.”

“Oh really?” The tree’s leaves seemed to bunch up in surprise. “I thought speaking to us is a common trait in your party. The firbolg, in particular, has been quite friendly. I have heard from many of the birds that traveled in the past how polite and helpful he is. He’s quite a celebrity amongst the forest dwellers.”

Fjord couldn’t help but laugh goodnaturedly. “Of course, that’s Caduceus. He cares a lot about helping others, especially those who can’t ask for it.”

“Why thank you, Mr. Fjord.” Speak and he shall appear.

Caduceus pushed away the vines and branches in front of him as he came closer. The light of the moon revealed his arrival and reflected against the firbolg’s hair, turning the bright pink strands into a soft lilac. “Please excuse me for eavesdropping, but I'm here to relieve you of the first watch and was wondering who you were talking to.”

The half-orc took a while to respond as he gaped at the firbolg’s beautiful figure. “Oh! Um.” He peeked at the elder tree in panic before giving up. Caduceus would help him with whatever predicament he got into now. “The tree. I was talking to the tree.”

“You were?” The firbolg’s smile grew even wider. He took a moment to say hello to the tree himself, and even pet the young bud delicately. “I’m glad you’re getting more comfortable with communicating to the Wildmother and her children.”

Fjord sighed. “Well...Duceus. This time, they’re responding to me. With actual words!”

The bud on the vine wiggled again, “Yup! Yup! Hi!”

The cleric must have felt the energy pulsing from the young flower in confirmation as the firbolg’s pink eyebrows lifted in surprise. Caduceus glided up to the half-orc excitedly. “Oh! That’s wonderful, Fjord!”

“Really?” Fjord took a small step back to look at the other in disbelief. “I don’t know why it’s happening at all.”

Caduceus hummed and grabbed Fjord’s arm leading him back to the tree. They both sat down. “Was there anything new that happened in particular? Anything special or strange?”

It was then that Fjord remembered his short dream from last night. He relayed it to the cleric hoping for any answers.

“That must have been a message from the Wildmother.” The firbolg’s face brightened in awe. “She wanted to connect with you on a deeper level. Have you understand what it’s like to be even the smallest of her children, to be hers.”

Fjord grinned sheepishly, “Of course it was. I’ve just gotten used to her speaking directly to me in my dreams.” He was still confused about one thing though. “But why let me be able to speak to plants and have them respond back? Why did she not do the same for you? You could help so much more if you could directly comprehend them.” Fjord looked at the greenery encompassing them as if Melora would appear to meet them. He wanted to plead with her to give Caduceus the gift the goddess gave Fjord instead.

Caduceus held Fjord’s wrist with one hand and placed his other hand against his own heart. “Oh, Fjord. I’m grateful for the gifts I have already. I hear her everywhere we go. She aids my journey through the guidance of her creations. Without them, I would never have met you all. Please don’t worry for me.”

Fjord gazed down at Caduceus’s hand around his wrist and shifted to hold the firbolg’s hand with both of his hands. The contrasting color and size overwhelmed the half-orc. That two beings so different were loved by the same people and the same patron. That maybe despite these differences, they could love each other. “If this gift stays with me. I’ll gladly help you with translation when you need them.”

Caduceus looked at Fjord fondly. He placed the palm of his free hand against the side of the half-orc’s face, lifting it so both of their eyes met, and kissed Fjord’s cheek. “That’s very sweet of you. I’d love to take you up on it.”

Fjord’s blush reappeared and stayed throughout the night.

“Awwww!”

“Hush, child. Don’t disturb them.”

Author’s Note: Based on the fact that Caduceus can speak to plants and animals, but is unable to get an understandable reply in return. Written entirely with Everybody Talks by Neon Trees on loop.

For @fjorclayweek 2020 Day 5: Dreams and Day 7: Nature

Cross-posted on AO3 as Everybody Talks (But Especially The Plants) by IAmOnlyPartlyMajestic

[crystal-jack-asripines]

I love this bone flute thing Cad has going. His “annoying little shit” little brother energy is coming out with it, and it’s ALL I’VE EVER WANTED IN MY LIFE

[angelsndragons]

Day 1

Day 1 of the Caduceus Clay celebration week, folks, so you know what that means: I get to gush about my favorite character. I did warn y’all I would word vomit.

So, what does Caduceus mean to me? 

Well.

My brother lives in a separate state and has for several years now. We talked on the phone pretty much every day but we still missed each other a lot. One of the last things he did to me in person was introduce me to D&D. I loved it. It gave me a community away from home and a way to meet new people and form new friendships in new areas. I would tell him all about my weekly game shop adventures, he would tell me about the homebrew campaign he was in online. He also told me about this little show called Critical Role. I, like the dumb oldest sibling I can be, pretty much ignored it, outside letting him talk to me about it and engaging with it secondhand. Then, my brother’s party lost one of their players. They were down to four players and no full casters, just a gunslinger, a barbarian, a monk, and a non-healer warlock. Things started getting dicey. Like, really dicey. He worried with me over how close their fights were getting and how he felt it was only a matter of time until someone legit died and they couldn’t do anything about it. So, I asked, “Well, can you ask them if I could play? You’re looking for someone and we’re looking to try to do something together, it could work out.” Two years later, that campaign is going strong and (thankfully) no one has died yet.

I bring up this context because it matters: I rolled up a level 10 Grave Cleric. I had never played a cleric before but I had wanted to before my game shop sessions fell apart. And here I was, willingly thrown into the deep end of one of the most complex subclasses of one of the most complex classes in the game. And initially, I was not happy with it. Not just because there was a lot to learn but because of sheer mechanics. By rote, I could not keep up with the damage that the rest of my party was doing. At all. My high level spells weren’t doing much more damage than my freaking cantrips and I just felt stuck. I wanted to contribute outside of healing but really just couldn’t. I shared my frustrations with my brother, who, being the little troll he is, said, “Well, you know Critical Role has a Grave Cleric now, right?” So, to start this love fest, Caduceus taught me how to be a better cleric and because of that, I will never be able untangle the character from my relationship with my brother. Even if he died tomorrow or went evil or whatever, I would still be fond of him just for that.

I don’t remember which episode of campaign 2 I first watched all the way through. I know I started paying attention around Fjord’s chicken game and was fully on board with the series by Yasha’s loss in the pit fight. What I do remember is Caduceus. I remember being drawn in by this guy for some reason I still can’t articulate. 

Caduceus is a complex character who is difficult to fully understand and love. People have said unkind things about him, about how he is a glorified NPC or that he is boring or that there is just no ‘there’ there or that he should just go home already. I have seen people say that they think Taliesin should go back to the drawing board and come back with a ‘better’ character, one who vibes better with the group or something. And the sad thing is, I can kind of see where these people are coming from. Understanding Caduceus and what Taliesin is doing with him requires people to pay attention to him, to actively think about him both when he is and is not in the spotlight. And that is hard. Because Caduceus is that character who aggressively tries to divert attention from himself. So right away, we have this tension, this push/pull when it comes to engaging with him. And I do love me a challenge in my favorites. Also love the polite but judgmental assholes who have Opinions they would never say but nevertheless own.

For me, Caduceus’ arc has been about duty and desire, what duty means, how to prioritize yourself, and how to grow. Caduceus’ interrogation of identity as it relates to duty and his blossoming as a person fascinate me most. What is your duty, really? What does it mean to find balance in your life? How do you take down the walls you built to protect yourself? Where do you end and where does your duty begin? What does faith look like outside a strictly Western/Christian lens? Can we find ourselves in other people? What does it mean to grow beyond your wildest imagination and the people you love most?

Caduceus begins the show as a passive, apathetic shadow of a man who has cloaked those traits in duty in order to not deal with his feelings. He had basically grown up in a literal paradise on earth where the problems of the world couldn’t reach or affect him. Until they did. Until his family left. Until the Nein crashed into his temple. Caduceus makes the choice to basically leave paradise, at the Wildmother’s urging, sure, and experience the world in all its messy beauty and ugliness. It is nothing like he expected. It is hard, it is cruel, it tries to drown him at every opportunity. It is also good, the animals, the people, the experiences he has. Hearing Marion sing, learning of a lighthouse to the Wildmother (which he does not fully appreciate yet, this light in the dark storm). Caduceus spends his first chunk of episodes waking up, seeing life outside of paradise. I love these early episodes because they demonstrate just how far Caduceus has actually come (can’t imagine this guy buying an overly large pirate hat as a prank or helping the Traveler offload some followers through an elaborate ceremony, for example).

The crux of Caduceus’ midgame story right up until he saves his family is this: You’ve seen the world, young cleric, are you sure you want to continue to save it? You can go home and turn your back on all of this, what makes you stay in this imperfect world with these imperfect people? We see this a lot, in the questions he asks the Gentleman, in his insistence they save Yasha, in his newfound appreciation and companionship in Fjord, in making the Xhorhaus a home, in his dealings with the stone giants, in his determination to help Nott and her family. And this is the part that made me love him because Caduceus doesn’t shy away from these moments or tough questions. Like most of what he does, he contemplates them quietly and lets his actions speak for him. Caduceus allows himself to get involved, to become invested.

Caduceus’ new major arc is his realization that he is not just some vessel, some passive thing through which the Wildmother’s will will flow. No, he learns that he has to make choices, that he can affect change, and that if he wants this messy, beautiful world to get better, he is going to have to do something about it. Not just wait for Her to tell him it is okay. Taking ownership of his future and what that means to him have shaped Caduceus these last thirty or so episodes. Caduceus has blossomed so damn much. He continued with the Nein because he wanted to, and that led to the discovery of the Astral Sea City. (side note: Anyone want to take a gander what would be happening right now if Caduceus hadn’t been with them?) He not only felt his feelings towards the Nein, he began expressing them. From the man who refused to Scry or Send to his family to one who has a friend call up his sister and tell her he will be back, from the man who clung so tightly to his need to be useful to the Nein to one who openly declares how much he loves these people and how reluctant he is to leave them, from a man who wanted to save his home to one who is trying to save the whole damn world, from a man who couldn’t articulate his feelings if you threatened him to one who is trying so hard communicate, from a man who needed saving from his own apathy and grief to one who saves others, this is who Caduceus Clay has become and I for one am excited to see how the next 100 episodes influence him.

Also I cannot end this word vomit without mentioning the fact that Caduceus being aroace and so warm, loving, and caring is so damn important. Because it is; there are too many people out there who think aros/aces are loveless robots or fake or whatever. And having this person, this caregiver, this annoying little brother, this compassionate man, to hold up against that kind of hate, ignorance, and indifference means more than I will ever be able to express. 

[alwaysyourqueen]

✨🍺!

✨ - best use of magic

i can't use the same answer twice so i won't choose the hag moment. in that case then hm…when fjord got his new magic from the wildmother and nott told him to prove it and he turned into a bit nott. funniest shit

🍺 - favorite nott moment

how the fuck am i supposed to choose. probably the moment when she turned into veth? because like…she got to be herself again even though it was scary. and she told caleb how much she loved him and i would die for their dynamic. and sam being a troll with a new character voice then swapping back. and the raw emotion of molding yourself into a person you want to be. it's what she deserves

(bonus: oh my god another mollyjest fan why wasn't i already following you?)