#wildlife sightings summary

[nexysworld]

Summary: Raccoon City, 1998. Leon, a rookie officer, encounters an exceptionally unique girl while on patrol. Captivated by her and concerned for her well-being, he decides to take her under his protection. Slowly, his thoughts increasingly revolve around her, and his concern for her safety turns into an obsession. Pairing: Developing Yandere Leon x Puppy Hybrid Reader Tags: NSFW, MDNI, Smut, Oneshot, Mild Slowburn, Female Masturbation, Sex, Creampies, Dubcon, Controlling behavior, Incredibly Naive Reader, Non Outbreak AU, Fingering, Pillow Humping, baby trapping, mentions of past trauma/medical related trauma, Umbrella corporation being evil, sweet sex, fluff, no use of y/n, heat cycles. WC: 14.6K

A/N: This was a commission for the ever wonderful and lovely @explorevenus. I loved writing this and I hope you love it too. <3 Also thank you @dollfacefantasy for beta reading for me. :)

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Thick fog permeated the area obstructing Leon’s view through the windshield of his cruiser. He didn’t really see a point in traffic patrols on nights like this; the road wasn’t visible, nor was any potential crime. Though he had to admit it was nice being able to sit and listen to the radio with nothing else to pull his attention. 

The particular strip of highway he was monitoring connected to the dense and dark woods that began the separation from the city to the mountains – it wasn’t uncommon for the shadows of the wildlife to occasionally dance against his headlights before the animal skittered off. It was something that used to unnerve him, but he’d grown used to it by now. 

The night bore on with little eventfulness, it was nearly midnight and time for Leon to phone in that he was ending his shift. Another night, exactly the same as before. 

Carefully, he pulled the vehicle out onto the road, keeping just slightly below speed to make up for the lack of visuals. Not paying much attention to anything besides the dim road ahead, he didn’t process anything in his peripherals – especially not the figure running towards the street.

“Shit!” He exclaimed, slamming the breaks. While the impact wasn’t high speed, it was too fast to stop in time – as he braced himself by squeezing his eyes shut, he heard the thump of something hit the hood. By the time he opened his eyes, he caught the tail end of the body rolling off and onto the road. 

“Are you alright?” He called out, not sure yet if it had been an animal or a person, as he shakily made his way over to the scene. His breath hitched upon the sight. “What the hell?” A girl, naked and ragdolled onto the pavement with a nonhuman set of ears and tail. Leon bent down, pressing his fingers to her neck. “She’s got a pulse, that’s good. Hey, can you hear me?” No sound came from the girl before him.

He knew he should’ve called for backup, had the paramedics on the way – but something about the whole situation was so peculiar it had his mind working at a negative speed. Gently he rolled her onto her back. There was no blood, just some scuffed up bruising on the girl’s left side from the impact, a goose egg forming on her head. 

Gently he tugged on one of the dog-like ears, expecting it to be part of a costume or a headband. Leon was thoroughly perplexed when he realized they were attached to the girl’s head, nearly jumping back when they twitched. A pained groan  left her mouth as she moved a bit, coming back to the conscious world, eyes lazily opening. Another muted mumble left her mouth as she rubbed at her head before sitting upright.

“Miss?” Leon put his hand on her shoulder trying to get her attention again.

She met his gaze and in an instant recoiled from him, growling as she scowled, even baring her teeth.

He noted the way the dog-ears on her head had pointed back all on their own, further evidence of them not being a costume prop. It was absurd, and he wasn’t sure whether to be on guard or laugh at her strange behavior. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been in such a strange situation in his entire life. “Miss, I need you to take a deep breath for me, calm down.”

She didn’t let up, growling at him with more intensity, her stance becoming tighter as if she was winding herself up to spring at him. Despite the hostility, he could see it in her eyes that she was scared.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” He reached his arm out again, slowly. “I’m a cop, I help people….do you understand me?”

She gave him an untrusting glance, eyeing at the hand as if it were offensive to be in her presence, but the growling had stopped. He dared his hand even closer again, this time managing to gently touch her cheek with the tips of his fingers. “You’re safe with me.”

Her bottom lip quivered before she relaxed a little.

He smiled at her. “Can you talk?”

“Yes.” Her voice was hoarse.

“My name’s Leon. Do you have a name?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know.”

“You got roughed up pretty good,” He tore his heavy uniform jacket off, wrapping it around her shoulders before standing. “You too hurt to walk? Need help up?”

She shook her head again, using the hood of the cruiser to wobble back to her feet. He could see the goosebumps on her skin from where the cool air was hitting everything not under the jacket – though he quickly averted his eyes up from where her indecency started. He placed a hand on her back, gently motioning her to follow him to the door of the car, opening it and ushering her into the warmth of the back seat. “What happened to your clothes?”

“Don’t have any.” She stared back at him, tilting her head to the side, dog ear flopping with it. It was cute, probably the cutest thing Leon had ever seen, and he wasn’t even sure what he was seeing still.

“Where are you from?”

“I don’t know.”

“What are you doing out here alone?”

She didn’t reply, nor did he get a peep out of her for any other questions. When it became clear that she was shutting down, Leon had to think fast. “These are real, aren’t they?” He asked bringing his hand out to touch the soft ears atop her head again. He felt them perk up beneath his hand, and he gave a little scratch to it, hearing the telltale sign of her tale thump lightly against the leathered backseat. “You like that, huh?” 

She responded by closing her eyes, nodding into his touch.

“Do you have somewhere to go?”

“No.”

Leon wasn’t sure what to do with the girl. She hadn’t done anything illegal – unless you counted public indecency, but he could tell that probably wasn’t by her own choice. On the other hand, she clearly wasn’t normal. He didn’t even know what to make of the animal attachments or her quirky mannerisms. With her head tilted to the side, he had a more clear view of her neck now, a tattoo catching his attention, it was a red and white logo he’d seen before. “The umbrella logo?” He asked out loud, more to himself than her.

She responded by jumping back in the seat, growling again, covering the mark with her hand.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He said, putting his hands up defensively. He was even less sure what a pharmaceutical company had to do with a girl like her – he could only venture to guess. Whatever happened there, she clearly wasn’t happy about it. “I won’t make you go back.”

“I don’t want to go back.”

“Then we’re in agreement.” He reached out and grabbed her hand, shaking it. She looked confused by the gesture but didn’t stop him. “When you shake on something, it means its a deal, you can’t go back on it.”

“Really?”

“That’s right. Why don’t you come stay with me for the night? You look like you could use some food and I wouldn’t feel comfortable letting you stay out in the cold like this.”

“Ok.” He helped slip her arms through the holes in his jacket, zipping it up before clicking the seat belt into place. She squirmed against it in a panic. “No! No! Get it off!”

“Hey, hey.” He cooed again, cupping her cheeks. “It’s alright. It’s to keep you safe.” She shook her head, fat tears brimming at her lash line. “It is, I promise.” He held his hand out to her again. She took it this time, mimicking his earlier action of shaking it. “See? I have to keep my word now.”

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You weren’t sure of the man sitting in the front seat, or why you had to be strapped down again. You hated being strapped down. But there was something about his eyes, they were so kind compared to the scary men in white lab coats. His scent too, sweet and musky, not the sterile chemical smell that was scattered around the labs. Leon was nice. Leon was safe.

The warmth of the moving box you were in was all it took for the soreness and fatigue to catch up with you, eyes growing heavier and heavier until you found yourself sinking into that sweet and comfortable darkness.

“Hey, we’re home.”

The familiar sound of Leon’s voice tore you from slumber, annoyed, you let out a grumble readjusting in the seat. Only the jarring feeling of the cold hitting you as the door opened again was enough to yank you fully back to consciousness with a frown. “Don’t wanna move.” 

He sighed. “Then I won’t make you,” a moment later you were being scooped up into his arms. Being cradled against his chest felt nice, another thing so very unlike the way you were used to being treated. 

The inside of his home wasn’t what you were expecting. Every corner of the small house radiated his scent, and it was warm. Not a concrete wall or blindingly white light anywhere. The couch he’d plopped you down onto was soft, fabric feeling nice against your skin. It couldn’t even hold a flame to the sticky leather of Dr. Birkin’s office seat. Sinking into the plushness, you couldn’t help but bury your nose into one of the pillows, tail wagging heavily as you took in more of Leon’s scent.

“Comfy?” He asked with a soft laugh.

“Yeah! Yeah!”

“You wait right there, I’ll be back. I just need to get out of these clothes, then we can work on getting some food in you.” He ruffled your hair, making you giggle. The heaviness of his jacket and the comfiness of the cushions kept you in place. 

When he returned, he was in gray pants and a white shirt. He held out some fabric towards you. “I get the feeling clothes aren’t something you’re used too, but I think it would be best if you put these on.” There was a light flushing to his face as he said the words, though you couldn’t figure out why.

“Why?” You asked, taking them from his hand. They didn’t smell as deeply of him as you’d liked, instead a synthetic floral scent wafted to your nose making your face scrunch up. “They smell bad. I don’t need them.” “Bad? They’re fresh out of the laundry they should smell like – oh. Your sense of smell is probably a lot stronger than mine, isn’t it? Hold that thought.” He ran back up the stairs again, this time coming down with another shirt. He thrust it out waiting until you took it. “That better?”

Yanking it from his hands, you brought it to your nose, inhaling it. It was much better, wrapped in Leon, you nodded in acknowledgement.

“It’s my undershirt from earlier, thought it might work better. Let’s compromise, you can wear that shirt, but the boxers gotta be fresh since they’re not as close to your nose.” 

You considered his suggestion, rubbing the fabric against your face again. “Alright.”  He helped you unzip the jacket and slide it off before slipping the shirt over your head, then holding out the black bottoms for you to step into. 

You didn’t love it, the way the clothes felt against your skin, it was restrictive in a way you weren’t used to – but when he praised you, petting your head again you decided you could suffer through the torment of clothing for him.

“Good girl.” He praised again, and you were done for, practically crawling into his lap to get closer to the hand that was scritching behind your ears. “How’re you feeling?”

“Sore, but ok.”

“I think I have some medicine –”

“No!” You interjected. Medicine was never a good thing, it meant feeling hazy, fuzzy. It meant waking up with headaches, not feeling like yourself. Medicine was bad.

“It’ll make your head and side feel better.”

“I don’t care.”

“Ok, ok.” He gave in, pulling you closer and wrapping an arm around you, gently running his hand down the back of your head in slow repetitions. “But if it gets too bad, let me know. Are you hungry?”

“I am.” 

He nodded, reaching for the phone on the side table. He said something about a large with extra cheese, but you had no clue what that meant. 

In fact, when he eventually answered the door and presented you with the triangular piece of food, you were even more confused. “What’s this?”

“It’s pizza.” He replied as if that was obvious, holding up the dripping thing and taking a bite out of the pointy end. 

You sniffed at the unfamiliar food. It looked nothing like the slop that constituted your meals back at the lab. It smelled strange too – but as Leon wolfed down his own piece, you took that as a sign it was safe to eat, even if a little strange. 

You couldn’t stop the moan leaving your mouth as your tongue met it – a strange mix of flavors but all were delicious as it melted in your mouth. Practically inhaling the piece, you scrambled forward to stuff your face with more.

Leon chuckled, rubbing your back. “I get the feeling you’ve never been given a decent meal before.”

You shook your head, another piece of pizza dangling from your mouth as you did so.

“Well, from now on you won’t have to worry about that.” He assured. “Promise.”

Did he really mean it? You weren’t sure, but so far he’d been nothing but kind. You smiled at him, food still in your mouth as you reached over to shake his free hand, making sure he couldn’t go back on his word.

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The moment the front door flew open, Leon was greeted by the tell tale sign of her presence, feet pattering around against the wooden floors as she bounded towards him. He caught her in his arms like he had every prior day, holding her close and resting his chin on her head. 

Her tail wagged behind her so fast it was hardly visible, but he could feel the light air current it created. Nothing warmed his heart more.

“You have a good day, sweetheart?”

“Mmm yeah, was boring without you though.” She whined. “They played the same movie on TV like 8 times!”

He chuckled brushing some hair away from her forehead before planting a kiss there. “That’s the worst.” He agreed, gently prying the girl off of him so he could make his way further inside the home to begin their evening routine – the same routine they’d gone through each night since he’d taken her home.

Leon didn’t have much going for him, sure he achieved his goal of graduating from the police academy, hell he even got his first pick of the local stations. But it wasn’t as fulfilling as he’d hoped. He had no grand career plans, or even life plans. His only reason for joining the police force was so he could help people, something that he rarely even did.

Traffic patrol, pencil pushing, the odd bar fight break ups – that was his life. 

At least until now. 

He found his thoughts wandering to her every spare chance he got. The image of her stretched out on the couch taking a midday nap, her curious naivety and childlike wonder over new things. The most mundane of things still revolved around her – and he loved it. Having someone to come home to and worry about gave him a genuine purpose. 

“Leon?”

“Yeah?” He responded as he pulled the soft cotton tshirt over his head. 

“Can we go on a walk tonight, please? Please?” She begged as she sat on the edge of their now shared bed.

“I don’t know, you remember what happened last time - “ 

“I know, I know. But I swear this time I’ll stay right by your side. I’ll even wear the hat!”

He let out a sigh, it was hard to say no when she was looking at him like that. “What has you wanting to go out so badly?” The thought of it dredged up some anxiety. While she was free to run about the property as she pleased, taking her into public was a different challenge all together. Not only were her social skills needing some work, but he was worried that wherever she’d come from, whoever had kept her originally was still looking for her.  Despite the time spent together, she hadn’t opened up much about anything still, not that he blamed her.

“The TV said there’s a para aid tonight.”

“A para aid?” He had no clue what she was going on about.

“Yeah! They showed all these fancy lights and food.” 

“Oh, the parade! The one down by the carnival.” He said in realization. “I don’t know… there’s going to be a lot of people there, lots of smells and noises too…”

The way she immediately shrunk down on herself, deflated in defeat, broke his heart. Her tail stopped wagging, fluffy ears flattened against the top of her head. It felt so wrong to be the cause of that upset, gut wrenching really. “You promise to keep the clothes on the whole time, and not run off on me?”

She perked up immediately, so quickly he was under the distinct suspicion she’d only been feigning her upset to get her way. Even that was endearing though. “Promise!”

“Then we can go for a little bit.” 

When she was at home running around in his boxers and shirts, it was adorable. But something about her dressed in his oversized clothes did something to him that he couldn’t explain. The gray beanie keeping her ears in place, the blue jacket covering where her tail was belted to her back, the jeans bunched at the waist and pooling at her ankles – it was like a sign of ownership in a way. 

He wrapped his arm around her, keeping her tucked into his side as they walked. He could see her head darting around every which way as the overwhelming sights came and left their view. “You alright?”

“Yeah. There’s just so much.”

“I told you.” He chuckled, squeezing her into him more. “If it gets to be too much, let me know and we can head home, ok?”

She nodded, but her eyes were already glued on the twinkling set of lights from the moving vehicles ahead of her. Leon moved the two of them forward enough so they could see the floats clearly as they came by.

“They’re beautiful.” She said, eyes wide in amazement. He could feel her tail attempting to move under the confines of the jacket-belt combo. It saddened him a bit that she wasn’t able to express herself the way she deserved for such a happy moment.

“Not as beautiful as you.” He watched as she looked in the opposite direction of him, despite the glowing multicolored lights of the next vehicle making its way past the crowd, he could still see the twinge of a flush on her cheeks from his comment. She looked pretty like that, soft and vulnerable – he couldn’t remember the last time someone gave him that fuzzy feeling, made his heart skip a beat.

“You really think that?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“Then why do I have to cover my ea - “

He shushed her, gently pulling her away from the crowd of people and the ongoing parade, until they were behind one of the teacup carnival rides. “You know you need to keep quiet about that when we’re out here. You promised.”

“But I don’t understand… if you think I’m pretty then why do I have to hide it?”

“Because - “ He was cut off when a group of teenagers bumped into them.

“My bad!” The kid said, waving them off as they walked away. The spot the two of them stood in was becoming more and more crowded as the street parade ended. With more people flooding in, Leon realized this wasn’t the time nor place for this conversation – but he knew he couldn’t leave her so upset either.

“Look, let me take you on one of the rides and we can talk, ok?”

“Rides?”

“Yeah, I think you’ll like it.” He said pointing to large ferris wheel rotating around. “That one, you get to sit in those carts and once you’re at the very top, you’ll get the view of the whole city.” Not waiting for her response, he took her by the hand leading her over to the line. Being halfway through the night there weren’t as many people lined up for the rides as there were for the games and food stalls. It didn’t take long before the two of them were seated, and the ride began to move.

He could tell by her body language alone the movement had her on edge. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t go any faster than this. We’re safe.”

“And I can look out?”

“Yep, just like I said, look.” He pointed out showing the bustling city below them as the wheel reached its peak.

“Oh wow.”

“That’s where I work.” He said pointing out to the large RPD building. “And that’s where I go to get the groceries.”

“And the pizza?”

“Over there.”

Now that the ride had been filled, it began to rotate again, she watched the city intently as it went around a few more rotations. He didn’t want to interrupt her intense fascination, so he let her be, only reaching out when she went a little too far over the opened window than he would’ve liked.

“Can we go again?”

“I can ask.” With the evening winding down more, and only a few others wanting to join the ride, the attendant nodded, allowing them to go again.

This time, her fascination dwindled slightly as she stayed put in the seat. “Can we talk about it now?”

“Covering up?”

She nodded, fidgeting with the cuffs of the jacket sleeve.

“When you’re home watching TV, do you ever see anyone that looks like you?”

“No.”

“It’s because you’re special, one of a kind.” He said tucking a stray strand of hair back under the beanie. “And I love that about you. My special puppydoll.” He smiled as she nuzzled into his hand. “But, because you’re so special, other people might not feel the same. People can be really mean when someone is different than them. I don’t want anyone to be mean to you, or worse, hurt you.”

A moment of silence washed over them, she scooted closer to rest her head on his shoulder, the cart swaying slightly.

“They were mean to me.”

“Who?”

“Where I came from.”

“Oh.” He wasn’t sure what else to say to that, it was the most information he’d gotten out of her and it hadn’t been a lot, but he was happy that she was confiding something after all this time. “I’m sorry that happened to you . . . Do you want to talk about it?”

“Dr. Birkin was the worst. There were two of them actually, lady Birkin and man Birkin. They yelled at me a lot, asked me tons of questions. Sometimes they would put me on this big table and tied me down, poke at me…” As she spoke her voice became more strained, her body tensing up along with it.

It was clear that her short explanation was merely the cliffnoted version of events, and he wasn’t going to pry further than that – he got the idea. “Hey, its ok.” He cooed, wrapping both arms around her. “You don’t have to worry about them any more. I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you.”

“What if they hurt you?” She peeked up from where her head had been nestled into the crook of his neck, a small wet patch formed where her eyes had watered.

“Why would they do that?”

“They’re bad people… and I wasn’t supposed to leave.”

“I’m a cop – its our job to keep people safe. And guess what?”

“What?”

“It makes us much harder to hurt.”

“Hey Leon?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I try something I saw on the TV?”

“You’re not going to jump out of here, are you?”

She giggled and shook her head. “No, I think that would be dangerous.”

“Then go for it.”

He was surprised when her lips met his, her arms slinking around his neck. He returned the gesture, holding her tightly to him, closing his eyes. “You learn to kiss like that just from watching the TV? I’m impressed.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Can I do it again?”

“I’d never say no.”

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The wheel came to its last stop, this time the man outside insisting they had to get off.  Leon nodded at the man, helping you step out of the cart.

“You hungry? I think some of the food places are still open if you want to try them. Or we can grab something on the way home.”

“Yeah, I’m starving.” You followed next to him as he was headed over to where the strong cacophony of smells was coming from. Like many experiences with Leon, it was something you couldn’t have imagined. Closing your eyes, you sniffed around, trying to identify and take in each individual scent that you could.

A familiar voice broke your concentration, if it weren’t for the stupid hat, your ear would’ve lifted allowing you better access to the sound. Instead it was muffled slightly, soon another familiar voice layered over that one. 

Swallowing dryly, dared to peek at the offending voices and immediately froze. The Birkins, it was hard to recognize them without their white outfits, but it was them – blonde hair and all, between them a small girl grasping at both of their hands. 

“No.” Voice breathless you tried to take a step and grab at Leon’s arm, only to realize he wasn’t next to you.

“What do you want?” The stranger responded.

“I-I’m sorr - “ The man didn’t let you finish, already walking away. Leon wasn’t anywhere in your sight, and despite your eyes darting around you failed to pick up on him or his scent. The surrounding crowd was beginning to overwhelm you, too much noise, too much to look at and take in.  “L-Leon?” No response, not that your voice could contend with the chatter around. 

A hand on your shoulder made you jump. “There you are.” Man Birkin. “We were wondering where you ran off too.”

Not giving the man a chance to do anything else, you took off. He gripped at the back of Leon’s jacket, almost yanking you backwards, but you caught yourself and slipped out of it, not caring if the surrounding people caught sight of your true form – all you were concerned with was getting away, putting as much distance between yourself and the Birkins as you could.

It wasn’t long before the maelstrom of colors and scents from the carnival died down, morphing into a disgustingly musty and cool toned city view. Legs burning, you stopped only to give yourself long enough to pant, trying to catch your breath.  Peering around the corner and doing a quick 360, there was no one in sight, not Birkin, not Leon, not anyone.

A new sense of fear encompassed you, the realization you were lost and alone again, just like that night in the woods. Even worse, fear that if Leon did find you, he’d be angry. The hat you were wearing long blew off in the wind, the belt having been ripped off to free your tail – it made running easier. You were exposed exactly in the way you’d promised him not to be, and you’d managed to leave his side too.

“He’s going to hate me.” You whined into your hands, slapping at your face as the tears began to spill. “I’m so stupid. So stupid.”  

Once calm enough to think the situation through more, you looked around again to assess your surroundings. The streets were empty, and it was a lot darker than it seemed from the top of the wheel. Eerily quiet too, so unlike the bustling cities you watched on the little box TV at home. 

Gripping your tail with both hands nervously, you started your trek down one of the narrow roads. If you’d learned anything from the TV, it was that you don’t stay in alleyways. Besides that, what knowledge you had was limited, a fact you were now painfully aware of upon realizing that you didn’t even have a clue of where you were walking to. A green sign pasted to the wall looked familiar. There was someone wearing clothes similar to Leon’s, and a big white arrow pointing down the path ‘RPD’, you’d recognized those symbols from Leon’s uniform, and the huge sign he’d pointed at during the ferris wheel. “Cops help people.” You reminded yourself of his words.

You followed the arrow, stumbling about until you were before the gigantic building. A man was leaning against the wall, talking into a small radio. He was huge, the biggest man you’d ever seen, brown hair and muscles everywhere. His clothes weren’t quite the same as Leon’s but seemed different than the other people at the carnival. Nervously, you stepped forward. “A-are you a cop?”

He looked down at you, despite his larger and slightly more gruff exterior, his eyes were soft and kind like Leon’s. “Not exactly, something like it though. Are you alright?”

“I’m looking for Leon.”

“Leon? Leon….oh officer Kennedy. He’s not working tonight.”

“I know, I got separated from him.”

“Ah, I gotcha.” He took a step forward, instinctively you took one back, not trusting of the stranger just yet. “Hey, no need to be scared. I can help you.”

“But you’re not a cop?” You asked, taking another calculated step back.

“Not a cop, but I still work here with Leon. See?” He pulled some type of badge out. It was too far away and too dark to see clearly, but the shape of the badge itself looked like the one Leon usually kept in his uniform pocket. “The name’s Chris, Chris Redfield. Come on, you can come inside and wait while I call him.” 

“Ok.” Where you had been standing it was dark, but once the streetlight fully illuminated your figure, you saw his face change. Sensing no malice, you didn’t make a move to run, but you didn’t walk any closer either. 

Chris opted to come to you, eyes narrowing suspiciously at your form. Your ears were flat to your head as you looked up at him. “Are those...real?” It was so similar to your first meeting with Leon, even the large hand coming down to pat your head, scritching at them. It felt so good, you’d let the grip on your tail go, rubbing back into his hand. You recognized the look of concern that spread over his feature, but it was quickly replaced with a smile as he guided you into the building, and past several doors. 

The man took a seat behind a desk, watching you as he picked up the phone. It rang a few times before he put it back onto the receiver, no answer. “You don’t look so hot. Hungry? Need a drink?”

“Please.”

“Here.” He said, opening a metal tin before handing it to you. “Homemade by my sister, guaranteed to be delicious.” He stood from the rolling chair he had been seated in, looking down at you. “Wait here for me, I think his cell number is somewhere around here. Just don’t leave this room, got it?”

Already halfway through scarfing down the sandwich, you couldn’t respond. You nodded in agreement though.

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Leon had never experienced anxiety on this level before, not once in his entire life. One moment he was ordering food, the next he realized you hadn’t been by his side. His heart sank. 

The next hour he’d spend running around the carnival area, up and down the streets where the parade was, only to come up empty handed. When he’d stumbled upon his jacket, he felt sick to his stomach – only worst case scenarios came to mind; your dead body on one of his police reports, headlines about a mysterious science experiment gone missing, or arguably worse – someone else taking you home for their own pleasure.

The thoughts only worsened when he pulled the antenna up from his phone before flipping it open. “Leon? It’s Redfield. I think I have your uh….friend here. The one with the extra parts.”

“Is she ok? Is she hurt? How’d she get - “ 

“She’s fine. But we need to talk. I’m keeping her in my office for right now, no one else is here besides some pencil pushers, but some of the patrolling squads will return soon. I won’t be able to hide her all night.”

“Shit.” Leon dug his sneaker into the gravel. “I can be there in 15, no more like 25 with all the traffic leaving. Look Chris, I can explain. “

There was some shuffling and Chris greeting someone on the other end of the line before his voice picked up again. “Bad news, some of the teams are already back.” His voice was now a low hushed whisper. “Look, just go home, I’ll meet you there with her. You’re still at the old sheriff's house right?”

“Yeah but wait - “

“Gotta go.” 

Leon bristled as the call cut off, snapping the phone shut. The walk to his jeep, and the drive back home were done in silence. He felt out of his own body, swishing back and forth on waves of anxiety. He paced back and forth waiting for an update. 

It felt like a lifetime had passed before the glow of Chris’ headlights made an appearance through the front windows of the house. Leon couldn’t contain the childlike giddiness he felt, bolting out the front door and over to her; crushing her into a too-tight hug.

“Leon…” She whined, attempting to squirm under his grasp.

“No.” He said firmly, refusing to let go. “I can’t believe you ran like that, you promised me.”

“Leon it wasn’t -”

“I don’t care. Don’t you ever scare me like that again, do you understand?” He finally gave her enough room to look up at him. He felt horrible at the knee-weakening stare she gave back, but he couldn’t bring himself to calm down enough to comfort her just yet. “Go inside and wait for me, I have to talk to Chris.”

“But Le - “

“Go.” He said more firmly, pointing towards the front door. He waited for her to slowly make her way towards it, ears down and tail nearly tucked between her legs.

“Hey, don't be so hard on her.” Chris said, putting his hand on Leon’s shoulder.

“Yeah I know. I’ll apologize later. Thanks for bringing her home.”

“Sure thing.” There was a moment of silence that passed between the two men before Chris finally piped up again. “Leon . . . how do you even have that girl? I saw the umbrella logo on her neck, she’s probably some experiment, or worse, a bioweapon.”

“A what? Her? No. No way.” Leon said, shaking his head. “She’s different...but harmless.”

Chris sighed. “I think so too, but you never know. How did you even get her? How long have you had her?”

“Almost a year now. I kind of stumbled on her one night during the end of my patrol. She was so scared, I couldn’t send her back Chris, not if you saw that look in her eye.” 

“I get it.” The taller man said. “You should be more careful. I’m not sure the ins and outs of it all myself, but I know that higher ups in the S.T.A.R.S. unit sometimes work with Umbrella. I wouldn’t even be surprised if that girl was reported to them already. I’d keep her away from the city from now on.”

“You’re right.” It wasn’t like he’d let her go out often as it was, but after tonight, he was realizing that she wasn’t made to go out at all. She was far better off here, at home. He also knew that she wasn’t going to like that change - but it was for her own good. “You’re not going to uh…say anything are you?”

“Nah.” Chris shrugged. “I don’t see a point, it wouldn’t benefit anyone. She’s better off with you, I think.”

“Well thanks again for bringing her back.”

“No problem. If you two need anything, let me know.” 

Leon nodded, he watched as Chris made his way back to his vehicle and waved him off, not moving until it was out of sight. The anxiety from the evening hadn’t fully left Leon, and now that she was back home and it was just the two of them, he was nervous. Not in the sense that he thought they would have a confrontation, but he knew given everything it would be awkward and he hated the feeling of awkwardness. 

“Hey, sweetheart?” He called out noticing she wasn't splayed across the couch like he expected. The non-immediate response set off alarm bells in his head, but he was relieved when she came trodding downstairs in her usual attire. 

“What?” 

As expected, she didn’t look happy, brows knitted together anger written all over her face. He pulled her into another hug with one arm, his free hand gently smoothing over the top of her head, focusing on her ears in a short rhythmic pattern. “I’m sorry for snapping at you like that. I’m just happy you’re safe, and home.”

“I didn’t mean to run off.” She mumbled against him, clinging to him in a hug of her own. “Really. One moment I couldn’t see you anymore, and I saw the Birkins there. It was so scary, I didn’t know what to do.”

“I should have kept a closer eye on you. I’m sorry.” Leon gave her a quick peck of the lips before pulling back.

“Leon?”

“Yeah?”

“Am I in trouble? I let Chris see me and -”

“No. No, you’re not in trouble.”

“Are you going to be in trouble?”

“No, I’ll be fine. Chris is a cool guy, you can trust him.” 

“Ok.”

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It was about a week after the night at the carnival that you noticed something was different between you and Leon now. You weren’t sure if it had to do with the kiss, or the rest of the evening. A sneaking suspicion told you it was likely both. 

Since that night, he never seemed to leave you alone. It wasn’t a bad thing, at first. New rules in place meant you weren’t allowed outside without him now, even on the property. He taught you how to use the house phone just so he could start calling several times a day to check in. When he was home, he was all over you, scarcely allowing you to even remain in a single room by yourself. 

It was all for your own safety, is how he’d explained it.

He cared about you more than anyone else ever had, and the added attention made your stomach tingle, tail wagging and ears perked. 

But soon it became too much, suffocating as time went on. It left you with torn feelings, on the one hand you knew you should be grateful to Leon, should soak in all the affection he bathed you in. And you wanted to really. Guilt ate away at you every time one too many hugs became irritating. One too many phone calls pulling your concentration from your current task. Going stir crazy in the same 4 walls day in and out. Not even being able to sit alone on the porch for a minute of solace. 

It was so reminiscent of the lab, and you hated yourself for making that connection – because Leon was not like the Birkins or anyone else there. He was kind. He was sweet. You loved him. Moreso, even being locked within the house, you had more freedom than those sterile white walls and blinding lights that you’d grown accustomed to. 

You felt shameful disgusted with yourself for harboring such thoughts. Despite that, the annoyance didn’t go away, it only grew despite yourself.

“Leooonnnnnn.” You whined, angrily tapping your fingers against the kitchen table. “You’ve been gone every day this week.”

“I know, I know. But Marvin’s been out sick, they needed someone to cover his shifts. Next week I’m all yours.” He said, ruffling your ears and kissing the top of your head like he always did. It was a small comfort, enough that you felt your tail do a single little thump against the seat. It wasn’t enough this time to improve your soured mood.

“I haven’t been out of the house in almost two weeks and that was just to sit on the porch. I’m bored. Can’t we go on another walk?”

“I told you to stop asking me that.” 

You recoiled. He didn’t yell, Leon never yelled, but his voice was sharp and cut like a knife. His usually soft features were pointed with irritation, and it seemed so unfitting for him. It was only the second time he’d ever snapped at you like that. He wasn’t wrong either, you’d been shot down every time you’d asked, and when you kept up the onslaught of begging, he had respectfully told you to stop. 

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He said as he idly grabbed the ingredients for dinner. “I know you’re going a little stir crazy here, I get it. Really.”

“Does that mean you might change your mind?”

“No.” He said, shooting you a weak smile.

“But you just said you understood.”

“I do understand. But sometimes what’s best for us isn’t what makes us happy, we gotta stick it out.”

“How long do I have to stick it out?”

“I don’t have an answer for that. But I promise it won’t be forever.” 

You weren’t sure if you believed him, but nodded anyway. “Ok.” 

This time when he ruffled your hair, you felt a strange warmness waterfall over you. It had you squirming in your seat. “Can I go sit on the porch while you make dinner at least? Please?"

He shot you a warning look, but it softened in an instant. "Fine, but only the porch, not a step past it. "

"Thank you! Thank you!" You cheered, assaulting his cheek with an onslaught of kisses the moment he'd agreed. You heard him say something as you skittered off, but it didn't register, beyond happy to finally have a taste of fresh air - a view of something that wasn't the same set of walls for the first time in weeks.

The air slapped your face immediately. It was chilly outside, so much so you were debating heading back to grab a coat or a blanket, but the fear that you may not be granted permission to go back out if you even stepped an inch back into the house, kept you planted. A little cold was nothing compared to feeling of the wind in your hair, the different scents of nature drawing their way into your nose.

Your ears twitched, picking up the sound of something nearby. Chirping. A bird! It was perched in a tree at the end of the property where the well-groomed lawn spread out into the wilderness that spanned beyond the old fence.

The bright red was unlike anything you'd ever seen before in person. You wanted a closer look, just to observe it, halting the moment your foot lifted off the threshold of the porch. Leon had only permitted you to stay on the porch. He trusted you.

Your legs felt antsy, burning with the need to move, run. Your mind itched with the want to get closer to the small bird before it flew away. Before you were confided to the house again. A pathetic squeal-like whine worked its way from the back of your throat as you gripped the ledge of the porch, bouncing your legs up in down as if you were marching. You just wanted to see it.

Sure Leon would be mad if he knew, but if you were quick enough, only a minute, then he'd never know. Besides, you would still be on the property, technically.

Apprehension settled in your stomach, tethering you to the porch. "Leeeoonnn, I'm hungry. Is dinner almost done?" You called, cracking the back door open just enough to hear his response.

"Five more minutes." He called back, "I promise you won't starve, just wait out there for me, we can eat on the porch tonight."

"Ok!"

Five minutes. The door closed with a creak, the latch of the doorknob clicking into place. The fiery bird was still there, perched happily on the branch. Five minutes. You repeated on more time before taking off.

It felt so good, the bottoms of your feet flattening against the grass with each step. The wind knocking your hair backwards out of your face as you ran, tail and ears pointed. You had to resist the urge to spin, arms out, happy to be in the center of the open yard again. But there was only limited time, and you needed to make sure your little trip meant something.

Five minutes. "Crap." You muttered to yourself. "How long has it even been since he first said 5 minutes?" Realizing you didn't have the time to linger, you continued your journey jogging until you clutched the fence with both hands. "Ow!" The fence was splintered a part from age, but you hadn't expected it to bite you.

Only one hand was injured, little speckles of blood forming against your skin. The most damage done to your index and middle fingers. You shoved them into your mouth to suck and lap at the injury, ignoring the metallic taste in favor of finalizing your mission.

There it was in all its glory, this fat red bird seated in its nest. It turned its head side to side a few times as if looking down at you. "Wow." Murmuring around your injured fingers, your free hand cam up to reach out to it. It chirped and hopped around before fluttering it's wings and landing on your extended finger.

Eyes wide as saucers, your face almost hurt from how outstretched your smile was. Despite being so plump looking, the bird was surprisingly lightweight. It chirped a few more times. "Hello." If not for the stinging in your left hand reminding you of the current situation, you'd have felt like the Disney princesses Leon showed you.

Leon that's right, dinner would be done soon and you had no idea how much of the five minutes had been wasted. The turning off the doorknob in the distance had your ear twitching in that direction. It was too late to head back.

The sound of plates crashing to the wooden flooring made you want to cry, the bird sitting on your finger kept you where you were. Your hope was that maybe Leon would see it, understand why you'd done what you did, but the heavy stride of his steps told you otherwise.

"Leon -"

"Don't."

The last loud step by your side had the bird flying away, making you sad.

"You promised me! The first time I give you an ounce of trust and this is what you do?"

"I'm sorry - "

"You're always sorry! Do you want to be taken away? Do you want to go back to the lab, or worse be stuck with some stranger?"

"No."

"Go back inside."

"Leon the food -"

"Go. Back. Inside."

It was the first time Leon ever looked genuinely angry, his sky blue eyes feeling like lasers boring into the back of your head as you shamefully walked back towards the house. The remnants of dinner scattered over the porch from where he'd dropped them.

"Careful." He commanded, lifting you from behind to help you up and over the mess of glass and food, though the tone was far more annoyed than caring. You stood in the corner of the living room, watching him stomp around the kitchen, opening and closing cabinets a little too roughly as he grabbed cleaning supplies.

Even the way he knelt down to begin scraping up the glass and food remnants off the ground just radiated negativity. "I can help clean it up."

"Don't bother." He said, getting as much of the mess into the dustpan. You sunk to the floor, pulling your knees to your chest, a defensive pose learned when you were still with the Birkins.

Leon didn't say another word to you as he stormed around the place, and you didn't have the guts to say anything to him either. You were in trouble. Real trouble.

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 He can't remember the last time he was so angry. He didn't usually get angry. Just wasn't that kind of guy. On the rare occasion it did happen, he was pretty good at reigning it in.

Now though? It felt like pure heat radiated from every vein in his body. He couldn't breathe without steam working its way from his lungs. He wasn't sure what he was the most upset about, the breach of trust? The defiance? Or maybe the way she batted those lashes, the stupid bird on her hand.

Manipulative. That's what she was being, he was sure of it. Manipulative because she thought she understood how things worked, thought she could just decide to do whatever she wanted without consequence. Worse, she thought he was a pushover that would just allow it at every turn.

He pinched his nose, leaning against the counter. When he finally felt a little more numb to his emotions, he allowed himself to look over to where she was sitting, curled up in the corner like a child. He wasn't sure if it was genuine submission he was viewing, or another way of trying to get under his skin. The gurgling of her belly coupled with the silence from her mouth was enough to at least draw his focus from the situation to her immediate needs.

Leon pulled the phone off the receiver, speed dialing the Chinese place. He wasn't in the mood to cook again, and while he didn't want to reward your misbehavior, he couldn't help the pull of the crab rangoon, knowing it would make his own mood improve.

"Get up." The words came out harsher than he had intended and when she flinched from him, he felt nauseous. He cleared his throat, trying again, this time much softer. "I need you to get up, you can't stay there all night."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Yes." She look like she'd been shot. "But I won't be forever. " He gently tugged her arm, helping her to her feet. He ruffled the hair on her head before smoothing his hands over her ears a few times. "I ordered something to eat. Let's talk before it gets here."

It wasn't a request, but he still appreciated the nod he got in return as he led her over to the couch. He had to admit now that he was mellowing out, he didn't like the invisible separation between the two of them. Now he finally understood what people meant about the tension being thick enough to cut. The way she was sat, stiff as a board hands palm up in her lap, he bristled once he realized one of them was injured. If it weren't for the still lingering simmer of anger in him, he'd have given in already pulling her close and doting on her until that sad look on her face melted to the gleeful smile he was used to.

"You broke my trust." He began, "That really hurts my feelings. The first time I give you a little leeway and this is what you do? I'm so disappointed in you."

"I just wanted to see the bird..."

"Why didn't you come ask?"

"Because you would say no! You always say no!"

"I didn't say no to the porch, did I?"

"No...but - "

"I let you do almost anything you want, damn it! The only time I say anything is when it has to do with your safety. So the few rules I have in place I expect to be followed. It's that simple. You're more human than dog, control yourself next time." He was raising his voice again, and he hated the sound of it. His own words rattling in his head and yet they continued to flow like a venomous waterfall.

"It was just the end of the yard. I thought I'd see it up close, then come right back."

"And you got hurt anyway. Look at your hand. That fence was old, dirty, that could get infected. And then what? It's not like I can take you to a regular hospital...." He put his palm over his face, sensing he needed to calm down all over again.

"You're right. I'm sorry. Really I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

He wish he hadn't looked. Her face contorted and scrunched, red, tears and snot running down her cheeks. His chest tightened, mouth suddenly dry. That wasn't manipulation. No one ugly cried like that if they didn't mean it. It didn't change the fact that the trust he had in her was fractured, but any other negative feelings fizzled out with a pop.

"I believe you." He cooed, reaching forward to wipe some tears away from her face. "I forgive you. "

"I...love you....Leon" The words came between wracked sobs.

"I love you too." He wrapped his arms around her tightly, letting her sob into his shoulder. "It's ok. It's ok," he repeated as he pet her hair. "You just gotta listen from now on, sweetheart. I don't want anything bad to happen to you. I don't want to lose you. It would break my heart."

"I will. I promise."

He wasn't so sure of that. He believed that she believed it though, and that sentiment was enough. He let her finish out her crying session until the delivery driver knocked on the door, tearing them out of the moment.

"Just a minute!" He called out, returning his attention to her. "After I grab the food, we'll get your hand cleaned up, eat, and get some sleep. Tomorrow will be better, alright?"

"Promise?"

"Promise." He cooked his pinky finger around hers, pressing a quick peck to her lips. Her ears pointed up in return, tail lifting to slowly move back and forth. That was his girl.

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 That strange warmness from earlier was back. A feeling of longing you couldn't quite place tugged at your core while heat made every part of your skin tingle, the bedding sticking to your clammy body. The wedge of moonlight coming in through the window caught your attention, pouring all your focus into eyeing it, trying desperately to ignore the discomfort, and to not wake Leon up. The last thing you needed right now was to have him upset with you all over again.

But whatever was wrong with you had slowly become too much, worsening by the hour.

The floorboards creaked with each step, feet feeling heavy as you tried to pad your way to the bathroom as quietly as you could. Even your lungs felt like you'd run a mile, panting the only way to get enough air without feeling suffocated.

One time, at the lab, you remembered feeling this way. It didn't last long before lady Birkin was stabbing a needle into your arm, frigid liquid cooling you down from within your veins. From that moment on, the shots became regular. They didn't explain what any of it meant, but you never felt that all consuming inferno again -- at least not until now.

Liquid cold. Instant relief.

That's all you craved. That's all you needed. That's all you could think about.

Liquid cold. Instant relief.

Stumbling into the bathroom, you flicked the light on, gripping the sink with your good hand so tightly a part of you was scared you'd crack the porcelain from sheer force of will. Your breath expanded over the mirror, fogging it up each time a heavy breath escaped. "Ok...I got this.....ok...." You told yourself, scuttling over to the tub.

Shower or bath, you mulled over the options quickly trying to make a decision. Leon took cold showers. He told you so, sometimes in the middle of the night, other times in the morning. You'd vaguely wake up to something poking you, and he'd be shuffling out of the bed. 'Shh. Go back to sleep.' He'd coo. 'Just feeling a little hot, 'gon take a cold shower, and I'll be right back.'

Good enough for you. The overhead shower roared to life as you turned the cold knob to max, water pattering loudly against the tub. You didn't even bother to strip, flopping yourself into the basin, clothes and all.

It felt like ice shards clattering against you, steam sizzling off your skin from the sheer difference in temperature. In any other situation, it would've felt miserable, too cold and uncomfortable. But right now, even the stinging pain of the water felt intoxicating compared to just being hot all over. It wasn't as good as the shot from lady Birkin, but it was enough to sooth.

As your body regulated its temperature, the aching sensations became more noticeable now. A pang of something between your legs had you clamping them together instinctively, skin making a slapping noise from the mix of force and wetness.

Your nipples hurt, hardening beneath the water, too rough against the tank top's fabric you had on. You needed to be freed from the clothes, weighing you to the bottom of the tub and sticking to your skin.

The shirt was the first to go, tugging it up and over your head, frustrated as the wet fabric seemed to stretch and stretch before it finally decided to free you of its grasp. The wet shirt hit the door with a smack and a plop, before sliding down onto the tile floor. You hiss when your nipples were exposed to the air, droplets of water making direct contact with the pruning skin. It wasn't as painful as the fabric, but it was definitely more sensitive.

Flattening your palms against your chest, you kneaded at your breasts, hoping warming them up a bit might help. It served its purpose, but each movement, skin rolling against skin made unfamiliar sensations of longing pulse between your legs.

You groaned, squeezing your legs together again. Every time you fixed one issue, another seemed to pop up somewhere else. You just wanted it all to go away.

The boxers were next, discarded next to the tank top. Now you felt weightless where you laid, nude flesh encompassed by the hug of the tub, water splashing down on you like rain. You were sure this is what heaven felt like, until another round of pulsating from your core made you bristle, ruining your moment of peace.

"No more..." you breathed out loud, startling yourself with the unrecognizable tone of your own voice.

You adjusted, one arm snaking its way under your neck for support, the other finding itself between your legs hoping to massage out the sensation if you could, like dealing with any sore muscle. The cold tips of your fingers brushed past something that made you gasp, toes flexing. A cold jolt, a warm tingle.

Tentatively, you brought your fingers back to that spot again, pressing down. It felt good, not quite as good as the first time, but the firm pressure seemed to quell some of the throbbing. You could feel your pulse in your fingers - were they being warmed by whatever was between your legs? Or was the cold of your fingers icing the spot there. You couldn't tell, both sensations melding together.

Why didn't it feel like the first time? Your brows came together, as you thought, eyes slipping closed. Spreading your fingers outward in a V shape, you felt it again, that jolt that made your lower half jump. The little bump, you discovered, was the key to that feeling.

Experimentally, you ran your index and middle finger over it again in a circular motion. A strangled noise worked itself out of your throat, and a muscle you weren't even aware you had tightened. It felt so good, but not enough. A burning pleasure on the outside, a dull thrum of need somewhere deep inside of you.

You wanted more room, spreading your legs as much as the tub would allow before hooking one over the ledge. You could worry about the water running off your foot and onto the floor later.

The water above served only as background noise now, your skin long numbed from the cold, allowing your brain to focus solely on what was happening below.

It felt like something was building up, like every sensation was working towards something, something you couldn't grasp. Frustrated noises echoed through the tiny bathroom, and your arm muscles burned with overexertion. Despite that, the need for something, anything, kept you going, desperately rubbing your fingers over the bundle of nerves in no rhyme or rhythm.

As fast as your body would allow, you pawed at yourself closer and closer until it felt like you were tossed off the edge of a cliff. Every muscle in your body tensed up. You forgot how to breathe. Splotches of white and black lights danced behind your eyelids. The shower was silent against the heartbeat hammering against your eardrums. Fuzzy ears twitched with your pulse, tail sloshing back and forth in the shallow water.

And as quickly as it came, the feeling was gone. So much rubbing, so much effort, so little warmth and too much exhaustion.

You went lax like a rag doll, leg sliding back into the tub, sore arm left where it was, hand still resting flat against your pubic area. When was the last time you felt this relaxed? Tired? Never, probably. Not even having the capacity to reach up to shut the water off, you were fully unconscious within seconds, facial muscles relaxing as the water rained down on you.

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 Light burned through his eyelids, the familiar feeling of consciousness tugged at his mind. He yawned, rubbing at his eyes. It was rare he didn't have to wake up to an alarm, it felt nice, just getting to lay there for a bit. The lack of warmth and dip in the mattress next to him made him grumble. "Sweetheart?" He reached over, patting around for her and coming up with nothing but the cool sheets beneath his palm.

Panic made him shoot up, eyes barely adjusting to the light as he looked around. The sound of the shower caught his attention. It meant she was home, at least, easing part of his concern. However, she never showered in the morning. Was something wrong?

Leon wiped the crust and sleep from his eyes as he made his way down the upstairs hall to the bathroom. The door wasn't closed all the way, stopped from swinging open by wet fabric bunching beneath it when he tried. "What the?" He knelt so he could move the cloth from the door before swinging it open. He was more confused at first, not seeing her silhouette. In fact, the shower curtain was mostly open, water having misted around the floor. Where the hell was she?

His took a step forward, knees buckling at the sight. He caught the edge of the tub with his hands, pajama pants soaking into the water on the floor. She was in there, unconscious. Her skin blueish in tint, unmoving was the water splashed over her form. He scrambled to shut the water off, almost turning the wrong knob in his panic.

"Come on, wake up." He said, shaking her by the shoulder. Her body wiggled, but she didn't move on her own. "Sweetheart... what did you do?" He looked her over again. Did she fall? But there was no bruising or blood. He lifted her arm, dropping it back on top of her. Nothing. He tried to feel for a pulse, but her skin was too cold to feel anything. Luckily, with the water off, it took only a moment before he heard the telltale sound of her teeth chattering together, even her tail seemed to vibrate as her body shivered involuntarily trying to gain some warmth. He'd have turned the warm water on if not for how pruny and textured her skin already was. She was practically water logged, but alive.

He yanked the towel off the bathroom rack, tossing it over her, helping to get a grip on her torso before pulling her out of the tub, cradling her against himself. He cartoon slid out of the bathroom, water making his feet hydroplane on the finished wood as he rushed you back to the bedroom. He didn't care about the mess, he just needed you to be ok, stuffing your cold body under the comforter, wrapping himself under with you, cocooning you in his body heat.

"Leon?" She blinked, knocking a few beads of water off her plush eyelashes. She was shivering violently. "I'm so cold."

"What the hell happened!?" His words held no malice, he was terrified more than he had the capacity to be angry, rubbing his palm against her back desperate to get some friction going between them.

"Was so hot... just wanted to cool off. Fell asleep...."

"You fell asleep in the shower?"

"Yeah."

"How'd you manage that?"

"So hot, then so sleepy."

He hadn't a clue what the hell she was talking about, but he was glad she was alive. He made a mental note to add a rule now that she wasn't allowed to use the shower without him from now on. In fact, he was already brainstorming a whole new set of rules and restrictions.

Every day, it seemed like she was tempting to pull herself away from him in one way or another. If it wasn't the way he could see her face tense when he was being overly affectionate. The way she complained and pushed boundaries. But this? God, he couldn't trust her to do anything anymore, could he?

His precious puppydoll, what was the matter with her? He peppered her forehead with kisses, ignoring his own shivering as the cold passed between them. She curled herself into him, his only focus was getting her comfortable and warmed up. He just couldn't understand her.

He wasn't sure how long the two of them had been laying there when she finally stopped shivering, falling back into sleep. Her breathing even, the sun through the window warm against the now soiled blankets. Leon couldn't find it within himself to do the same. He was wide awake, thinking about what to do. Watching her puppy ears twitch every now again, idly running his fingers through her now drying hair.

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You couldn't remember sleeping like that before, so exhausted, the world was gone. Dreamless. Vaguely, there was the memory of feeling so cold that your bones ached. Even when your eyes cracked open, part of your face felt numb - still you were nude, half wrapped in a towel and curled under the blanket.

'When did I come back to bed?' You thought to yourself, pawing at your eyes to get the crust and goopy feeling to go away. Despite the memory of freezing, the only thing you felt again was hot. Pure heat all over again.

"Good morning." Leon's voice caught your attention, his hands gently stroking your ears.

"Morning." You said, still groggy, a squeaky yawn leaving you as your eyes adjusted to the world. As if the warmth wasn't bad enough, everything felt off, the man laying in front of you just seemed so much more than he normally was. Leon's face was smooth, skin vibrant with life. You were hyper aware of the warmth on his cheeks, the cool undertones that cast the shadows of his features. His blue eyes were so opaque they could've been painted on stained-glass.

"Are you ok?" He asked, his large hand cupping your cheek. "Your pupils are dilated."

You had no clue what that meant, but you had this overwhelming instinct to press yourself to him, and you did. Nose nestled firmly into the crook of his neck, taking in a deep inhale. Had he always smelled this good? You whined, fisting his shirt to anchor yourself to him, tail drumming behind you in a desperate attempt to ground yourself from the stimuli. His scent was so intense, it was hypnotizing, and you craved more of him. Your tongue reached out to lap at the junction between his neck and collar bone, tasting his skin. That new but familiar aching between your legs was back with a vengeance. You wormed your hand down between your legs attempting to stave off the feeling, when Leon's hands met your shoulders to push you away from him slightly.

"What are you doing?" His face was tinged with a bright blush you hadn't seen before on him. Was he embarrassed by something? You weren't sure why, he looked so perfect right now. "H-hey now." He said, pressing you away from him, a firm grip on both your shoulders.

"Leoonnnn..." You whined his name, squirming to get back to him. When he wasn't budging, face still etched in confusion, a low growl began to bubble from the back of your throat, fangs bearing at him from frustration.

"What the hell's gotten into you? Are you seriously growling at me?" He kept his hold on you firm, giving a light squeeze to your shoulders. His face morphed into something you couldn't fully read, a cross between what you presumed to be anger and something else. Unable to articulate your need for him, the heat you were feeling - the growling didn't ease up. You struggled in his grasp, snapping and snarling, pawing at his arms as best you could with the awkward angle.

"Bad girl!" He snapped, voice loud and sharp. He rolled you over, pinning you down against the mattress, using his body weight to keep you there, his face level above yours. The surprise movement coupled with chiding made you halt for a moment. With his face so close to yours, there was no reason for you to remain so upset, instead you happily peppered his face with kissing, running your nose against his jaw again to take in his scent. A contented mewl dug it's way out of you.

"Leon, please." Tail wagging between your legs, you tried so hard to get him to understand. "Too hot. Everything's s'hot. Make it better?" You ground your hips upwards against him a few times. Something hard poked against your thigh as you did it, but Leon didn't move immediately.

When he finally did move, he was peeling himself away from you. "What the fuck?" He asked aloud to no one in particular.

"Leon!" You demanded, reaching your hands out to grab at him. He dodged them easily, slipping off the mattress, staring down at you. "It hurts, it's too hot. Leon, please." The room felt like it was teetering, you were so wound up, you wanted to cry, scream, throw yourself onto the floor. Anything to help cope with the overstimulation of everything going on. Even the silence was too much, aiding in your ability to hear both your heartbeats pounding in your head. The heat, smell, the visuals.

Flopping forwards onto the bed, you buried your face in the blanket, inhaling his scent again. The corner of his pillow had caught against the spot between your legs from the movement. It was dull, but you felt it. That same pleasurable feeling from the night before. With a soft groan, you bore down again, grinding your hips onto the bed to try and get more of that pressure, anything to quell that ache.

Leon still hadn't said anything, but you were too driven by instinct to even care. The blanket blocking your vision, his scent mixed with laundry detergent sating your olfactory, all you could focus on was rocking your hips against the pillow letting that pressure build up again.

"I get it now..." He finally piped up, kneeling down and patting your shoulder.

Panting, you lifted your head to look at him. "H-help me?"

"I can't, at least not how you need." He brushed some of the hair that had clung to your face from sweat away. Again his expression was unreadable, and you hated it. You didn't understand, all you wanted was to feel normal again. For the heat and ache to go away.

Tears clung to your lash line, unable to cope any more as your hips picked up speeding, rutting desperately against the pillow. Leon drew his hand back as he stood again. He did a strange shuffle messing with his pants, before quickly exiting the room. You reached out for him, wanting to call him back to you, beg him not to go, but the door slammed closed behind him. Unable to do anything else, you squeezed your eyes shut, flopping there until a few more movements of your hips had that same pleasurable feeling washing over you again.

Sighing in relief, you just laid there, bringing the blanket back to your nose to inhale it.

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The moment the door slammed behind him, Leon bound down the stairs, skipping half the steps. He needed to distance himself, clear his head. Her erratic behavior had thrown him a loop that he could hardly process. The way she was begging for him, clinging to him, fucking herself against his pillow - all within a few minutes of waking up. It was enough to make his pajama pants tent painfully.

What he wouldn't give to let you pepper his face in more of those kisses while he railed you into the mattress. She shivered at the thought, pushing it to the outskirts of his consciousness to try and calm down. His palms felt sweaty, and his heart was hammering a mile a minute.

He couldn't do that to you. It wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be fair. You were in heat...at least he thought so. Not in your right mind. But even if you were in your right mind, he still hadn't concluded what exactly your relationship was. Were you even aware enough to consent to anything more than kisses?

He didn't know. And he wished he didn't care enough to know, wanting to give in to his baser instincts.

For now, he was stuck sitting on the floor in front of the couch, catching his breath. He leaned back, letting his head fall onto the cushion. "Fuck." He palmed himself through the cottony fabric of his pajama pants to ease his own tension. He couldn't get the image of her out of his head, every time he blinked he saw her dilated pupils, that lovesick longing. Leon's had girlfriends before, not many, but he's had them, and he's sure not one of them ever looked at him like that. There was never a connection he'd felt with someone so intense before, like she would die without him. Maybe she would.

She would.

She would.

He was sure of that fact, especially after last night.

He wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. 'She does need me, I know that.' He confirmed to himself. 'God.' He let out a few deep breaths, removing his hand from his crotch, allowing his erection to deflate. It was just one more thing to add to the list of everything else he was dealing with.

Her behavior. Her desire to keep pushing his boundaries. Her erratic behavior the night before. Now this.

He listened to see if he could hear her. Luckily, there was nothing but silence from the upstairs bedroom. She'd likely fallen back asleep, giving him even more time to process things. In all his 21 years of life, he was sure he had never faced a challenge like this one before, but he was never one to give up or back down. His puppydoll needed him, and he was going to figure things out, even if it was the death of him. He owed her that, he owed himself that.

"I could call Chris, maybe..." He mumbled to himself, looking to the landline. Something about the idea of Chris knowing she was in heat, even imagining what she was looking like right now didn't set right with him. Leon wasn't a jealous person by nature, but somehow a phantom jealousy shut that idea down. No, she needed him not anyone else right now.

"Think, think." He chided himself, cupping his temples with his hands. Did he go back upstairs to her? Comfort her in the short term? Did he leave her there? Longterm?

He slicked his hair out of his face, emptying his head of all thoughts for a moment. "If she's in heat then she must have other instincts right? She's fertile, and she'll want to nest and...mating makes animals closer right?" He mused out loud, then it occurred to him. This situation was the solution, not another problem.

"No, that's messed up... I shouldn't even be thinking about..." But he was, the image of her swollen and gravid with a baby, his baby flashed before his eyes. She'd be so needy, tired. So focused on what her body was meant to do, she wouldn't need to try and get into any more trouble.

It was tempting. So very tempting.

It would solve her problem of being bored too, with a baby to focus on, take care of. She wouldn't have to be lonely while he was away.

The more he thought of it, the more appealing it was becoming. His cock was filling out again, twitching each time he pictured it. He had a solid job, a house, two things most people his age didn't. He could do it. Really.

By the time the wet spot formed on his pajamas, any moral argument against the plan had disappeared by the need to get his rocks off, to fuck a baby into her. He was convinced that this was the perfect solution in totality.

His legs were a little shaky as he stumbled to his feet, every step of the stairs felt like running through sand. Electricity skipped through his nerves, leaving him tweaking like a livewire. The door creaked open slowly, and he poked his head back in.

She hadn't moved from her spot, face down on top of the covers. One of her ears twitched, before pointing up in his direction. "H-hey."

Her head lifted just enough to look at him, her eyes glossy and dilated still. The sheen of sweat that made her skin glisten was enough of an indicator that she was still hot all over. "Are you mad at me?"

That shattered him, truly. "No, no sweetheart, I'm not mad. I was just...surprised." He coaxed her to sit up, taking his own spot next to her. "I'm sorry for responding that way. Are you still feeling uncomfortable?"

She nodded, "Yeah. Not like because, but everything is still so hot."

"Is that...is that why you took a cold shower last night?"

"Just wanted it to stop."

He nodded, "I understand. You had me so worried though, you can get really sick if you stay cold too long."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be." He said, pecking her on the cheek. "I'm sorry you're feeling so unwell. I think I can help you now though. Would you like that?"

"But I thought you said - "

"Nevermind what I said before. I was being stupid." The look she was giving him now nearly sent him into cardiac arrest, that sweet pleading face begging for him to devour her. "I promise, I'll make it all better, ok?"

"Really?"

He smiled, reaching down to lock his pinky around hers. "I promise. I'll make it all better, just trust me."

She nodded, and he took the opportunity to lean forward and capture her lips with his own, unlike the ferris wheel or any other time, he tried his best to convey his own need. He groaned into her mouth, tongue sweeping against her bottom lip before slipping it into her mouth the moment her lips parted. He slid it along hers, nearly whining himself as he pressed her back down onto the bed, grinding his tented and leaking cock down against her a few times, his pants soaking with her own juices.

"You're so pretty. So perfect. My pretty perfect puppydoll. " He cooed, pulling away just enough to kiss her jaw, then her neck. "I've never met anyone like you before. I've never wanted anyone as much as you before." He admitted, swirling his tongue over one of her nipples.

"Leon!" She gasped, squirming beneath him. He pressed himself down onto her more to keep her still before popping off to latch on to her other breast. He ran his thumb over the perked up one, smearing his own saliva across it as he worked the current one with his mouth. He could feel her thighs twitching from the stimulation, he could only imagine how her poor pussy was feeling. Her skin was feverish, sticky. He loved it, it felt so primal.

"Don't worry sweetheart." He leaned back to give her a moment to catch her breath, seizing the chance to spread her legs. He groaned at the sight of her slick folds, her hole twitching and closing over nothing. Prettiest pussy he'd ever seen, he ever would see, he was sure of it. Leon made a mental note to devour her next time, make her squirm and scream on his tongue until she was pulling his hair out - see how many noises he could get her to make. The thought alone almost made him cum, and he had to take a deep breath to refocus.

There was a task at hand, and his own need was starting to become painful. He tugged his pants and boxers down just enough to free his cock and balls, letting his shaft slap against his abdomen. He hissed at the feeling of the air, relief washing over him from the lack of restriction.

With one hand he squeezed the base of his shaft, holding the pressure there before stroking himself slowly, as slow as he could without torturing himself. With his free hand he slipped two fingers into her folds, running them up and down, coating them in her slick.

"This might feel a little weird, just trust me, ok?" He warned.

"I trust you." She whispered, barely louder than a mouse.

"Good girl." He heard her tail hit the bed, wagging from the praise. 'Fuck, she's too cute.' He pressed his fingers into her slowly, she was so tight, so wet. He could only imagine the way she'd feel finally wrapped around him. He pressed his thumb against her clit circling it gently, leaving the inserted fingers still. "Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah. Feels good."

"Good." He nodded, beginning to move his fingers in and out of her slowly. "If it hurts, tell me, alright?" He picked up speed, switching from thrusting to spreading his fingers within her, feeling the resistance of her walls contracting from the movements. Her slick covered the palm of his hand, and he refocused his thumb back to her clit.

She made a noise, he wasn't entirely sure if it was agreement or not, but the look on her face was enough to tell him she was enjoying herself. He continued to finger her, entranced by the small squeaks she made, the way her facial muscles twitched with each new sensation. The sun hit her face at just the right angle, illuminating her features like an angel.

She was an angel.

God he loved her so much, it hurt.

He pulled his hand out, chuckling at the needy whine she let out. "Don't worry, just give me a sec." He wiped the slick from his hand all over his tip and shaft, making sure it was good and wet before leaning over her again. Pressing the mushroomy head against her entrance, he kissed her one more time. "I love you." He mumbled against her lips.

"Love you t-"

She was cut off when he sunk himself inside of her. He was careful, slow, whimpering at how constricting she was. It was euphoric nearly, how her walls squeezed against every inch of him, sucking him into her. Her eyes were wide, mouth parted the moment he gave a shallow thrust.

"So good. So good for me baby." He cooed, resting both elbows beside her head, lazily grinding into her. "Never had someone so perfect before."

"L-leon... so full...what's happening....?"

"I'm making you allllllll better." He said, sloppily kissing her jaw a few times. "Just like I promised." He enjoyed the closeness, the intimacy of laying atop her like this, slow, soft. "Gotta take care of my puppydoll."

She squeezed her eyes shut, relaxing against the pillow, soft whines escaping her with every movement he made. Now that she was more placid, and he was able to sink himself fully into her. The feeling was indescribable. He was on cloud nine balls deep inside of her.

"Such a good girl. Good, good girl." He chanted, pulling back just enough to pull her legs up to her chest, so he had a better angle to bear down into her. She wrapped her arms around him, latching her nails into his back, red crescent shaped marks left over every time she dragged them against his skin. Her nose buried in his neck as she clung to him, whimpering and whining.

The sound of his name falling from her lips, mumbled into his skin like a prayer, coupled with the squeezing of her walls around him, was enough to make him lose it. He felt his balls tighten the moment she came, nearly crying as he gripped her hips bruisingly, slamming the head of his cock as deep as he could. He held himself like that as he shot his load. "F-fuck." He groaned, squeezing his own eyes shut before shallowly thrusting again, riding out the hot waves of pleasure that overcame him.

He caught his breath, kissing her forehead a few times. He wasn't ready to pull out, even when he felt himself going soft. Instead, he propped himself above her a little longer before daring to crack his eyes open. She looked half asleep, peaceful beneath him. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired....good."

"I'm glad, baby. Still hot?"

"Not like before... Am I fixed now?"

"I think so, we might have to do this a few more times. But you'll feel better and better each time." He assured.

She nodded, yawning. He could see her eyelids growing heavy again, fighting off the impending sleep. "Poor thing, you should get some sleep."

"Slept a lot, don't wanna."

"You need it." He slowly pulled out of her, rolling off to the side so he could hold her close. He flattened his palm against her belly, imagining the future again, what it would feel like a few months from now. "Take a nap, I'll lay with you. I'll even take you on a walk later. "

"Really?"

"Really." He pulled the blanket back over the two of them. "I promise." She nestled herself into his side, hooking her pinky around his. She didn't say anything further, closing her eyes and sinking into unconsciousness next to him.

[igbylicious]

under the new moon [yunsan x reader]

pairing: yunho x f reader x san

rating: 18+

genre: werewolf au, smut, hurt / comfort

summary: an altercation with a hunter leaves you wounded, trapped in an aggressive frenzy, but Yunho and San know exactly how to safely bring you back home to them.

wc: 2.9k

general warnings: established relationship, supernatural werewolf strength for everyone, she/her pronouns for reader, pov switches, mentions of blood & injury, reader killed a werewolf hunter in self-defense, a pinch of angst, reader is literally feral and tries to fight yunsan first, they calm you down w/ sex yay

smut warnings: dom Yunho & San, feral sub reader, rough sex, manhandling, scratching, choking, biting, breeding kink, belly bulge, they got big dicks ofc, cum inflation, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, knotting, DP (vaginal & vaginal / anal), vaginal / anal fingering, bodily fluids as lube, unprotected sex, pet names (good girl, darling)

a/n: idk yall, it’s not even themed for the mv i don’t know what happened??? maybe it was San’s fur coat maybe it was just the wolf living in my chest cavity. either way this was written in an unedited frenzy in the dark hours of the night, have fun! ( ˘ ³˘)♡

The forest is dark. Only stars shine overhead, the new moon casting no light on the trees and underbrush. Two large wolves prowl through woods, their path guided by the thick, metallic scent of blood.

The forest is quiet. Even during a new moon, its wildlife knows better than to cross the two predators. Even when unable to tap into the full height of their powers, they are dangerous.

Even more so when they are agitated with anger — and worry.

Yunho sniffs at the blood streaked over the bark of a felled tree. It’s still fresh. It’s yours.

San whines in concern, pressing his snout into Yunho’s neck to hurry him along. His black fur makes him near invisible in the cover of night, yellow eyes shining in the darkness. Usually the younger wolf is too rash, but tonight his impatience is justified. They don’t know how badly wounded you are. How much time you still have.

They found the hunter about two miles back, or what was left of him. Torn apart; a gaping hole in his abdomen opened by furious claws, his neck shredded by sharp teeth. (Deservedly so, Yunho had thought with quiet rage, when he saw a bloodied spearhead by the hunter’s side. The wooden shaft was shattered to pieces.)

Your trail leads them deeper and deeper into the forest, the night cold doing its best to penetrate Yunho’s thick silver fur. He tries to keep his head clear, to focus on finding you. He can’t afford to be distracted now, not by anger, not by fear, not by guilt.

It was a mistake, to let you go off on your own tonight. He knew the pack would be vulnerable tonight, he knew the human village nearby has been restless.

But Yunho can punish himself for his regrets later, because he also knows two other truths; the blood is still fresh, and you are strong.

They will find you. Alive. They will.

San growls in frustration when your bloody trail dissolves into a shallow river, the scent lost. The two wolves shift back into their human forms, wrapped in large fur cloaks, the ones they can take with them even when they turn. San’s pitch black, Yunho’s streaked with silver, matching the colour of their fur; and now their hair.

“She’s close,” San murmurs lowly, restless as he looks around the seemingly abandoned forest. “I can feel her.”

You are close. Closer than either of them realised.

The underbrush rustles, and San doesn’t even have the chance to blink before a shape pounces him from the shadows, snarling wildly. San curses as bloodied nails claw at his face, grabbing at his assailant to hold them at bay — to hold you at bay.

Yunho’s eyes widen at the sight of you, feral and growling; your body human, but pure primal aggression in your mind. Fur cloak tattered, skin covered in scratches and bruises, an ugly gash on your shin. The injury does nothing to slow you down, momentum and surprise on your side as you pin San to the ground.

Yunho swears under his breath, leaping forward to help San to subdue you.

Fuck. You went too deep.

Had to push yourself too hard under this new moon, dug too deep for the power you needed to survive. Your wolf has overtaken you; and she is too frenzied to recognise friend from foe. To recognise her mates.

You yowl when Yunho grabs you by the scruff, yanking you away from San. You instantly turn on Yunho, scratching at his chest while you try to bite at the hand on your neck.

“San,” he grunts, hissing at the red marks your nails leave on his skin. “Now.”

San throws himself around you, pressing against your back as he grabs your wrists and locks his arms around your waist, engulfing you in his black furs. You snap at him, teeth flashing, but Yunho’s hand slips around your throat and he forces you to face him.

“Calm. Down,” Yunho growls, his own wolf instinctively rearing up against yours.

You can’t calm down. You can’t. Something is familiar about the two figures surrounding you, their scent like an itch in your memory — but it can’t penetrate the feral haze that’s taken over your mind. Your wolf trashes against their hold, howling danger, pain searing through your injured leg.

The bleeding has stopped by now, your regenerative powers feeding off your frenzy, but no matter how you struggle, you aren’t strong enough to break free from the two men and their strangely enticing smells. The hand on your throat tightens, your growls forced down to a weak wheeze as your body sags in their hold.

“Good. Good girl.” The hand relaxes, but does not release you entirely. Slowly they go down on their knees and lower you to the mossy forest ground, keeping you propped up between them. Long fingers brush up against a scarred patch of skin in the crook of your neck, and sudden heat lashes through you at the touch, drawing a sharp moan.

The one behind you groans and presses his nose into your hair, breathing in deeply. “Yunho…” he rasps, pulling you closer into him. Familiar name. Familiar scents. Familiar touch, fire licking sharply at your core. He is naked under his furs, same as you — and the growing hardness that twitches against your lower back is not unknown to you either. “F-fuck, she’s…”

“Yeah,” Yunho murmurs, rubbing his fingers into the mating bite he left on your skin years ago. “Her body remembers who she belongs with. Come, Sannie, let’s help her mind remember too.”

He pushes your tattered furs away to drop on the ground, and San takes immediate advantage to lap at his own newly exposed mark on your shoulder. You jolt in his hold, your wolf pulled in two directions. Yunho instantly tightens his grip again when you snarl and try to bite at San again — but he can smell your other, stronger instincts flare to life. His free hand finds wet slick when it slides between your thighs, a strangled whine torn from your obstructed throat.

San whines at the soft squelch when two of Yunho’s long fingers press inside you. Relief and hunger melt together inside him. You’re safe, back in his arms. They will take care of you now.

A primal need stirs in San’s blood as his teeth scrape over your skin, suckling at his old mating bite like his tongue can tease the memories out of you. Maybe it can. Or maybe it won’t be enough — maybe he needs to fuck them out of you. He groans, feeling dizzy on your scent, and ruts harder against your backside.

You’re trembling, gasping sharply as you’re pushed deeper on Yunho’s fingers by San’s humping. Every noise only fuels San’s need to fill you up, to ram his cock into your leaking hole until his knot catches, reminding your sweet cunt how the shape of him was made to fit inside you.

“Wanna touch…” he groans, gathering your wrists in one hand so he can reach down the other. Weakly you squirm against his hold; but it’s barely a fight, your aggressive haze subdued by your two mates.

Yunho grunts at the sight; he can’t deny it, his wolf preens at your submission. An animalistic urge to claim you, like he’s mating you for the first time all over again. Blood rushes down to his cock, revelling in your whimpers when San pushes another finger into your sopping cunt alongside his.

He watches how your stomach tenses and your thighs shake, telltale signs of a budding release, and he knows damn well his hand on your throat has long become unnecessary. He does not take it away.

Instead Yunho tilts up your head and he leans in, slotting his lips over yours. He groans when your lips part willingly for him, desirous for your mates. You whine as Yunho filthily licks into your mouth, adding another finger as he and San stretch you open for them. They’ll both take you tonight. Together. It hasn’t been said, but Yunho knows that San also knows this.

Mindlessly you grind into the fingers opening you up. You pant into the heated lips pressed against yours, a greedy tongue mapping out the wet cavern of your mouth. Wanton moans spill freely, growing louder with every added finger to your twitching cunt. Every time you think this must be your limit, and every time they prove you wrong, sending your head spinning.

You’re chasing something, barely knowing what it is, but hunting it down with every buck of your hips all the same. Something familiar again, pulling taut inside your aching cunt. It pulls, pulls, tighter and sharper until finally the strings snap. You cry out a ragged yowl as electrified heat tears you asunder, convulsing in the strong arms that hold you up.

You don’t even notice those hungry lips pulling away from your mouth — not until two pairs of teeth sink deep into your shoulder and neck, into those two scarred spots that make your heart sing like it can finally come home.

With a wretched sob you clutch onto them, your hands finally released from San’s iron grip. He presses rough, reverent kisses against the broken skin of your shoulder, clumsy with urgency as he slips his fingers out of your cunt and grabs onto your waist. He barely waits for Yunho to pull his hand away, too frenzied to finally sink his cock into the wet hole where it belongs.

Yunho chuckles with dark fondness at San’s impatience, running his slick fingers through San’s hair as he presses a kiss on his matted forehead. “That’s it. Show her,” he whispers, and San whines at the encouragement, fingers digging harder into the meat of your hips.

“Y-you too,” he grunts tightly, strained as the last shreds of self-control slip through his grasp. “Our mate— she needs you too.”

Yunho hums in acknowledgement, pressing another kiss on San’s forehead before he pulls back. He takes your arms and loops them around his neck, and his cock twitches at how pliantly you let him move you, nuzzling into his chest. Still trapped in your delirious haze, but your wolf tamed and rendered docile by their command over your pleasure, willingly surrendering you to them.

You whine beautifully, your glistening folds parting to make way when Yunho guides his thick cock inside your loosened cunt. For all their efforts to stretch you open, both of them are big, and Yunho groans when he sees how your stomach bulges as he presses deeper inside. He takes San’s hand and guides it so he can feel the swell of them in your belly.

And something snaps inside of San.

He bares his teeth with a wild snarl, bucking his hips as he fucks into you recklessly. Fresh bites litter your shoulders, future bruises forming under his grip on your waist. You’re jostled by his rough thrusts, whimpering loudly as you claw at Yunho’s shoulders.

Yunho growls at the sting of your nails, meeting San’s violent pace. You’re moaning helplessly against his chest, hiccuping soft “ah ah ahh”s as they hit deep inside your needy, sopping cunt.

“Gonna fill you up,” San growls, lost in his frenzy. “Fill that belly with every drop of seed we got. Not gonna stop until we got you stuffed and bred. Won’t even know whose litter it is, won’t even matter. Ours, you’re ours.”

You whine in mindless agreement, trembling between them.

“You like that, hm? Like the thought of carrying our pups?” Yunho chuckles, though it comes out more a groan. You’re still so tight around him, San’s cock sliding against his in the snug space they made for themselves inside you. “You remember who you belong with now?”

His last question causes a hesitation in your squirmy moans, but it only spurs Yunho on harder. He can’t feel his knot begin to swell yet, so he just slams into you, drowning in every wet squelch of your leaking hole, only needing a few hard thrusts before he groans and spills inside you. Yunho hisses when San does not slow down — but his own cock does not soften. This night is far from over.

San moans at the smoother slide as he fucks Yunho’s seed deeper inside your hole. It does not take him long to follow, his hand on your stomach feeling every thrust as he buries himself into you, hips stuttering when he comes with a low growl. He pants against your shoulder, nosing at his mating bite, barely even slowing down through his release. Yunho starts moving again too, drawing fresh moans from your lips.

You feebly gurgle something against Yunho’s chest, the foggy haze in your mind consisting of nothing but white-hot pleasure now.

It’s overwhelming and yet you can’t get enough of it; addicted to the stretch, to the fullness that grows every time they cum inside you, until you can’t take more, their seed leaking out past their thick lengths and bubbling at the rim. You’re losing count, just as you’ve lost count of all the times you’ve clenched around them, milking their cocks as another orgasm was ripped from your worn-out cunt.

You can’t tell anymore where you end and where they begin, their hands and cocks melded into your body — until one hand wanders, first down to your sodden folds to slick up his fingers, then back to your ass. You whine as a thick finger eases past the tight muscle; but your body is so pliant and relaxed, melting away in the haze of pleasure, and soon the slight burn only makes you greedy for more.

San groans when you weakly press your ass back into him, two fingers now working you open, and then another. He will knot soon, he can feel it pulsing at the base of his cock; and no matter how well they prepped you, they will tear you apart if they both knot in your cunt.

But San does not mind taking your ass instead — he can feel the beautiful swell of your stomach, distended from the sheer amount of cum that you took so well from them. He did his part there, now happy to bury himself between your plump asscheeks.

You whimper when San pulls out, a sudden emptiness at the loss of him, but bite down a gasp when he pushes back inside your other hole. His cock is slick with cum, smoothly continuing his rough pace.

Yunho sighs contently at the loose and easy slide of your cunt, using this chance to fuck harder into you. He pulls you away from his chest to sit upright, and holds your chin to steady you. He tilts your head up, giving himself a good look at the blissed-out expression on your face. Nothing but empty pleasure behind your teary eyes, all your earlier fear and aggression wiped clean. Leaving yourself vulnerable and exposed between them, knowing you are safe here. That you can let it all go.

“Got one more for us, darling?” he grunts, trying to hold back a little longer. “Show us how good we make you feel?”

It feels like the words are coming to you through a thick fog, but you heed them all the same. You can’t help it, not when nimble fingers suddenly press against your clit, pinching at the swollen, oversensitive nub. Your entire body seizes up with a strangled cry, and you sob at the pure, overwhelming fullness as two knots swell up inside you, plugging both your holes.

You’re shaking, tears spilling down your cheeks as you slowly come down. Four hands move warmly over your body; rubbing your back, your shoulders, the distinct swell of your belly. One of those hands cups your cheek, lifting you up to meet a pair of shiny brown eyes.

Yunho’s eyes.

He smiles tiredly with rounded cheeks, long fingers gently caressing your jaw. Your breath catches at the recognition, staring back at him with wide eyes before you whip your head to look back. There, San gives you a slow, satisfied grin, his cheeks flushed and sweat beading on his forehead.

Relief breaks through your haze, and the sudden outpouring of emotion is too much for you to carry.

San startles when you hiccup a weak sob, and he immediately presses soothing kisses on the scattered bites he left on your shoulder. “Hey, hey, it’s alright. We’re here,” he murmurs. “We got you.”

“I know, I know” you snivel, grateful for Yunho carefully wiping away your tears. “You found me. I knew you’d find me.”

“Of course we found you,” Yunho smiles as he gently rubs his thumb over your cheekbone. “You wouldn’t let us lose you. You always find your way back to us.”

Your shoulder shake silently as their arms wrap around you, engulfing you in their body heat. You slump into their solid, strong frames and relish how they’re still connected inside you. It will take time for their knots to come down, and they fully intend to use every second of it to lavish you with tender affection. You sink away into the comfort of them, knowing you are safe and home again.

[eu-nicola]

secret island

summary: while searching for the treasure, JJ and you are separated from the group and must survive together on an isolated island. In the midst of danger, both give in to the attraction, but when returning to the others, JJ is already involved Kie and you and him have to face guilt

warnings: nothing i think

word counter: 3794

author's note: english is not my first language

The sun rose over the horizon like a burning eye, shedding light across the vast ocean. The waves gently crashed against the shore, a stark contrast to the storm that had battered the boat the night before. You woke up with clammy, salty skin, the constant sound of water hitting the sand. At first, it all seemed like a blurry dream, but when you opened your eyes, the first thing you saw was JJ, lying a few feet away, his blonde hair messy and covered in sand.

You crawled over to him, your body aching and your muscles tense.

“JJ,” you called hoarsely, barely a whisper from exhaustion. You shook him lightly. “JJ, wake up!”

He groaned and opened his eyes slowly, blinking against the sunlight.

“Where…?” His words were cut off as he quickly sat up, looking around. His blue eyes widened as he realized the situation. “What the… Are we on an island?”

You looked around. The beach stretched out in both directions, surrounded by dense tropical trees rustling in the breeze. There was no sign of the boat, or the others. Just you and JJ. The weight of reality crashed down on you like a wave.

“The storm…” you recalled quietly. “It separated us from the group. I don’t know where the others are.”

JJ ran a hand through his hair, frustrated.

“Great. Just what we needed. Lost in the middle of nowhere.” His eyes searched for you, his tone softer. “Are you okay? Does anything hurt?”

You shook your head.

“I’m fine. Just tired.” You paused, looking at the horizon with concern. “Do you think the others are okay?”

JJ sighed and stood up, brushing sand off his pants.

“They’re tough. If anyone can survive, it’s them.” He held out his hand to help you up.

You accepted his hand and stood up. You decided to explore the surroundings to see what resources you could find. The heat of the sun was stifling as you walked into the jungle, following a small nature trail that seemed to go deeper into the island.

The sound of wildlife filled the air: exotic birds chirping, insects buzzing. After what seemed like hours, they found a freshwater stream. JJ knelt down and drank directly from his hands, while you followed suit, letting the cool water quench your burning thirst.

“This is a good start,” JJ said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “But we still need food. Do you know how to catch fish?”

You looked at him with a sarcastic smile.

“Sure, I’m an expert fisherman in my spare time.”

JJ laughed, a sound that eased the tension a little.

“Well, there’s always a first time for everything.” He stood up and began searching for flat, sharp stones near the stream. “We’re going to build a makeshift spear. We need protein if we want to keep our strength up.”

While he worked on the spears, you explored a little more around the stream, picking fruits that looked safe to eat. When you returned, JJ was already finished and was testing the spear in the water, focused like you’d never seen him before.

The afternoon moved quickly as you worked together. You managed to catch a few small fish, enough for a modest meal. JJ started a makeshift fire using dry branches and stones, and soon the smell of roasting fish filled the air.

As you ate in silence, dusk enveloped the island in a soft gloom. The sky was tinted with shades of orange and purple, a beautiful sight despite the desperation of the situation.

“Hey,” JJ said finally, breaking the silence. “We’re going to get through this, you know? We’re fucking Pogues. There’s nothing we can’t handle.”

You gave him a small smile back, sensing a spark of hope in his words.

“You’re right. We came through worse. This won’t be any different.”

The sound of the waves and the crackling of the fire filled the space between you as the night fully settled in. The light of the stars and the moon illuminated the beach, giving it an almost magical feel. JJ laid on his back in the sand, hands behind his head, and you did the same.

The fifth day on the island began with a heaviness in the air, as if the sun rising over the horizon was growing hotter and scorching. It had only been a couple of days, but the weight of the situation was beginning to bite hard. Water and food were limited, and while JJ seemed to be taking it all in stride, you couldn’t say the same.

You sat by the fire, watching the pond you had fished in the night before, as JJ sharpened the spears again. There was something in his eyes, something in his attitude, that suggested he was used to this kind of situation, but you weren’t. You couldn't get used to the discomfort, to the uncertainty. The days stretched on as if the island was made of endless time.

Suddenly, the sound of snapping branches brought you out of your thoughts. JJ walked over, raising an eyebrow at you as you sat with your shoulders slumped, staring at the horizon as if you were waiting for something or someone to appear.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice soft, but with a hint of concern at seeing you so still.

His words were the trigger. Unable to help it, the pressure building up in your chest exploded.

“I can’t take it anymore,” you said, raising your voice without thinking. “I want to leave. This is wrong, JJ. This is all wrong. I don’t want to be here.”

The silence that followed made you feel the pang of guilt, but also the relief of finally expressing what you thought.

JJ stared at you, his expression more serious than usual. He sat down next to you, putting the spear aside. There was no judgment in his eyes, just a patience that contrasted with your growing desperation.

“I know,” he said in a whisper. It was the first time you heard him in such a low tone, so different from usual. He ran a hand over his face, thoughtful. “We all want to leave, right? No one wants to be stuck here, not knowing if the others are okay, not knowing what’s going to happen. But… what can we do now? We can’t do anything.”

You took a breath, trying to calm yourself, but frustration was consuming you.

“And how are we supposed to survive if this keeps up?” Your voice was shaking, but you refused to let the rage control you. The sun was burning hotter than before, and the sting of the heat only accentuated your irritation. “I don’t know what’s going on, I don’t know if anyone will come to rescue us, I don’t know if… if I’m even okay. I’m not strong.”

He looked at you for a moment, as if considering something, before speaking softly.

“You don’t have to be strong all the time. No one is.” He paused, his tone serious and deeper. “And I… I don’t want to be here either, but we are.” And we only have one choice: hold on. It’s not easy, but if we stick together, we’ll have a chance of getting out of here.

His words made you feel a little calmer, but not enough. You looked at him, seeing the sincerity in his eyes, but also a kind of silent determination that he hadn’t shown before. For a moment, you thought that maybe, just maybe, you could rely on him to keep you afloat.

“What if we can’t?” you asked, doubt in your voice. “What if we don’t survive?”

JJ let out a sigh and looked at you, this time with a small smile.

“Then we’ll have died together. And honestly, that doesn’t sound so bad when you say it out loud.”

Her attempt at humor didn’t entirely ease the tension, but for a second, the words made the weight of the situation not so crushing. It was okay to feel weak, to be scared. The important thing was not to give up. Not now.

The rest of the day passed in a state of constant activity. You and JJ searched for more resources, more fruit, trying to gather as much as you could from the island. You didn’t talk much more about what you both wanted, but the mutual understanding of the situation was there, heavy but present. Sometimes, JJ would ask you small, almost everyday questions, as if he were trying to keep your mind occupied, as if conversations were the only temporary refuge.

As evening fell, you sat by the fire again, staring into the flames with a lost expression, but this time with less despair. It was strange how everything changed, how anxiety would creep into your bones and then slowly dissipate, only to return later.

By the end of the fifth day, you realized something: you didn’t know how much longer you could keep that constant tension in your chest, but if there was one thing you could do, it was to hold on to the moments when you felt capable of surviving. Like that night, as the sun set and the stars began to come out, sitting next to JJ, breathing deeply.

“You know what?” you said quietly, looking up at the sky. “Maybe this isn’t the worst place I could be.”

JJ didn’t say anything for a moment, just staring at the sky as calmly as he had from the beginning.

“I’m glad to hear that. Now, how about we rest? Tomorrow will be another day.”

You nodded and followed him.

The island seemed darker that night. The fire flickered less intensely, and the sound of the jungle felt louder, closer. The leaves rustled with every breeze, and the small sounds of animals moving in the undergrowth made your heart beat faster than usual. Despite your exhaustion, you couldn't sleep. You were lying on the sand, eyes fixed on the starry sky, when you heard JJ move beside you.

“You can’t sleep either?” he asked quietly.

You shook your head, not taking your eyes off the sky.

“No. All of this…” You gestured towards the jungle and the dark ocean. “It doesn’t leave me alone. It’s like something’s lurking.”

JJ sat up, propping himself up on his elbows, and looked at you with a mix of curiosity and concern.

“It’s normal. The island can be intimidating, especially at night. But you’re safe here with me.”

Something in his tone made you look at him. JJ had that carefree air even in the worst of situations, but this time there was something more in his words. Something that made the air between you two seem thicker.

“What if we’re not?” you asked, your voice barely a whisper. It was a question you’d avoided asking, but now it seemed inevitable.

JJ didn’t answer right away. Instead, he moved a little closer, sitting completely in front of you. His blue eyes sparkled in the firelight, and his expression softened.

“Then I will fight to make sure we are,” he finally answered, with a seriousness he rarely showed.

That answer, that promise, made something inside you crack. You had been holding so much in, fighting fear and uncertainty, that you hadn’t allowed yourself to feel anything else. But now, with him so close, the impending danger didn’t seem so terrifying. There was something else, something that had been growing between the two of you since the moment you found yourself trapped on this island.

“JJ…” you whispered, and his name slipped from your lips with a softness that surprised you.

He didn’t say anything, but his gaze intensified. You could feel the tension building, an invisible pull that tied you together, growing stronger. His hand moved slowly, brushing against yours, and that simple contact sent an electric shock through your body.

“You know?” he said hoarsely, his eyes fixed on yours “I never imagined we would end up like this, alone on an island, fighting to survive.”

JJ had always been a close friend, someone you shared adventures and laughs with, but you’d never seen this side of him. Vulnerable, honest, and with an intensity that made you forget everything else.

“I didn’t expect it either,” you admitted, your voice shaking slightly. “But… I don’t know what I would do if I was here alone.”

JJ cracked a soft smile, and his hand came up to caress your cheek, his thumb tracing a slow, deliberate path over your skin. It was such an intimate gesture that it took your breath away.

“You’re not alone,” he whispered, leaning into you slightly.

Your breathing quickened, and for a moment, everything stopped. The jungle, the sea, even the fire seemed to fade away, leaving only JJ and you. When his lips finally touched yours, it was like all the weight of the world melted away. The kiss started softly, almost like a question, but soon intensified, a passionate response to the fear and tension you had both been suppressing.

His hands found your waist, gently pulling you towards him, while you tangled your fingers in his hair, losing yourself in the moment. The heat between you was scorching, stronger than the sun that had punished the island during the day. Every touch, every caress, was an affirmation that you were alive, that despite the danger, you were still here, together.

When you finally separated, you were both breathing heavily. JJ rested his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed as his lips curved into a small smile.

“That… was unexpected,” he murmured, with a mix of amusement and seriousness.

You laughed softly, feeling your cheeks burn.

“Yes, but… I liked it.”

JJ opened his eyes and looked at you with an intensity that made you shudder.

“Me too…you're shaking” he murmured, his fingers brushing your arm with a touch that sent a shiver down your spine.

“It's the adrenaline” you replied, although you both knew it wasn't just that.

There was a moment of silence, heavy with tension. You could feel the heat emanating from his body, the way his breathing seemed to sync with yours. JJ leaned closer, and this time he didn’t wait. His lips found yours again, but there was nothing gentle about this kiss. It was intense, urgent, like you both knew this was inevitable.

Your hands gripped his shirt, pulling him closer to you, while he wrapped his arms around your waist tightly, as if he was afraid you might disappear. The fire burning nearby seemed insignificant compared to the warmth you shared. Everything else disappeared: the island, the jungle, the fear. There was only the two of you, lost in a whirlwind of emotions.

JJ guided you towards the sand, his movements careful but firm, as if he wanted to make sure you felt safe at all times. He pulled away for a moment, his gaze scanning your face as if he wanted to memorize every detail.

“Are you sure about this?” he asked, his voice low and heavy with emotion.

You nodded without hesitation. There was no room for uncertainty. What you felt at that moment was so powerful that it eclipsed any doubt or fear.

“Yes. I'm sure.”

That was all he needed to hear. His lips returned to yours with renewed passion, while his hands explored your body with a mix of tenderness and desire. You felt every caress, every touch, as if the entire world depended on this moment. Your own fingers moved across his skin, discovering every muscle, every scar, every part of him that you had known for years but now felt completely new.

The sand beneath you was warm, but the heat you shared was much more intense. His lips left a trail of kisses from your neck to your collarbones, while his hands moved with a skill and delicacy that made you shiver. Every touch, every whisper, made you feel more alive than ever.

Time seemed to stand still as you both gave yourself completely to each other. There was a deep connection, something beyond the physical, as if the danger and loneliness of the island had created an unbreakable bond between you. It was a moment of vulnerability and total surrender, where you both let go of any barriers that might have existed.

When it was all over, JJ laid down beside you, both of you breathing heavily as the sound of the waves filled the silence. There was no need for words. The way he laced his fingers through yours said everything you needed to know. You looked up at the starry sky, feeling more connected to him, and to yourself, than you had ever been before.

“I guess this changes things,” JJ finally said, a soft smile as he turned his head to look at you.

You laughed softly, still feeling the warmth of his body next to yours.

“Yeah, but I don’t know if it’s for the better.”

Dawn came with the soft glow of the sun reflecting off the ocean. Warm colors lit up the island, but despite the quiet outside, you and JJ felt caught in a whirlpool of emotions. You had shared something deep, something that went beyond words, but the light of day brought with it a reality that was hard to ignore.

Sitting by the campfire, the two of you were silent, watching the flames slowly consume the pieces of wood JJ had collected. Ashes rose into the air, disappearing with the wind. There was something about that scene that reflected exactly how you felt: consumed, but not empty.

JJ was beside you, his hands resting on his knees, his expression lost in the fire. Finally, he broke the silence.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his voice soft, laden with a concern he couldn’t hide.

You nodded slowly, though you knew the answer was much more complicated.

“I’m… trying to process everything.”

He looked at you, his blue eyes filled with emotions he couldn’t verbalize.

“What happened last night…” he began, but stopped, choosing his words carefully. “I wouldn’t change it for anything, but I know things are going to be different when we get back.”

That last sentence echoed in your mind. When we get back. Despite everything, you both knew you couldn’t stay on the island forever. There was a life outside of this temporary shelter, a world full of complications and relationships that you couldn’t ignore.

Before you could respond, the sound of an engine in the distance interrupted the conversation. You both stood up quickly, your hearts beating fast. JJ ran to the shore, his eyes scanning the horizon, and then you saw it: a speedboat approaching, with the familiar figures of his friends on board.

“It’s them!” JJ shouted, with a mix of relief and excitement.

You froze for a moment, feeling a wave of conflicting emotions. The joy of being rescued mixed with a sense of loss, as if you were leaving something important behind.

The speedboat stopped near the shore, and Pope was the first to jump in, followed by Kie and finally John B.

“They’re alive, damn it!” John B yelled, running over to JJ to hug him.

Kie quickly came over, and before you could say anything, she hugged you tightly as well.

“We thought we lost you,” she murmured, her voice shaking slightly.

You and JJ exchanged a brief glance. There was no time for explanations, and perhaps that was for the best.

The ride back to civilization was silent. Although John B and Pope tried to lighten the mood with some banter, you and JJ barely participated.

Arriving home everything felt different. Hugs and expressions of relief from friends couldn’t erase the feeling of awkwardness growing inside you. Especially when you saw Kie approach JJ with a beaming smile.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she said, hugging him with a familiarity that made your stomach turn.

JJ hugged back, but his fleeting glance at you told you everything you needed to know. He was struggling with guilt, too.

The next few days passed in a kind of haze. JJ and Kie seemed to grow closer, laughing together and sharing moments that made you feel like an intruder. But, despite that, you couldn’t help but remember every detail of the night you’d shared with JJ. Every look, every touch, was etched into your memory.

One afternoon, as you sat alone, JJ came over. His expression was serious, and you sat up straighter, preparing yourself for whatever he was going to say.

“We need to talk,” he said quietly, sitting down next to you.

“I know,” you replied, not looking directly at him.

There was a long silence before he finally spoke.

“I know this is complicated. Kie and I…” He paused, as if searching for the right words. “Things with her are…confusing. But what happened between you and me…it was real. I don’t want you to think I’m ignoring it.”

You looked up at him, finally meeting his blue eyes.

“JJ, I know it’s not easy. But I also know that we can’t change what happened. The only thing I’m worried about is… how we’re going to move forward.”

JJ nodded, his expression showing a rare moment of vulnerability.

“I don’t regret anything,” he confessed. “But I don’t want to hurt anyone either.”

That confession hit you harder than you expected. You felt the same way. There was no regret, but the guilt was still there, a constant weight that you both shared in silence.

“I don’t regret it either,” you finally said, your voice barely a whisper.

The air between you both grew thick once again, but this time there was no physical contact. Just a mutual understanding that what had happened on the island had changed you, even if you could never talk about it openly.

JJ slowly stood up, and before he left, he gave you one last look.

“I’ll take care of you, always. Even if we can't talk about this, you know that, right?”

You nodded, feeling a lump in your throat.

“I know, JJ.”

[htchnr]

♰ my heart is a sad affair ༻ C. HOWARD.*ೃ˚ PART TWO.

➻ masterlist. ➻ buy me a coffee!

CW ➻ shouting ⋆ FEELINGSSSS ⋆ reader smacks the everliving HECK out of Cooper ⋆ he deserved it ⋆ kissing ⋆ mention of a Gulper ⋆ flashback to hunting deer in a forest ⋆ fallout canon violence/descriptions ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!

PAIRING ➻ wife!reader x Cooper. (they were married before the war, but both of them believe the other is long dead.)

SUMMARY ➻ you were gonna strangle him when you got your hands on him. after shouting for Ma to come out and cut you loose you were livid. you had found him after all this time, alive, and he leaves like that? he was going to get the slap of the century, and then some. WC ➻ 3,2K.

© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫!

you were gonna strangle him when you got your hands on him. after shouting for Ma to come out and cut you loose you were livid. you had found him after all this time, alive, and he leaves like that? he was going to get the slap of the century, and then some.

you were thankful now for the tracking or hunting skills he taught you while on vacation in the deep woods so many decades ago, teaching you how to track and hunt wildlife. but now, you'll make him regret it.

"you look for anything," he pauses pointing to some tracks, but also towards some leaves that looked half eaten. "tracks or signs, and try and gauge what direction they came from," he explains, rifle on his back as you two quietly walked through the dense forest.

"seems easy enough," you shrug, glancing around. you'd always been a quick learner, so this was gonna be a piece of cake.

he chuckles, a warm smile on his lips. "we'll see about that sweetheart," he gestures for you to head in front of him. "let's see how you do," he grins, throwing a cheeky wink your way. you snort, shaking your head with a smile as you step in front of him, eyes flitting around you.

though, with the heavy boot prints in the loose sand and dirt it felt too easy. you rolled your shoulder as you walked along the tracks, looking at the different sets of foot prints;

one set that would belong to Vault Dweller, another set which clearly belonged to Wilzig, a heavy limp clear in them (along with blood) — and the last set belonging to Cooper. you also noticed what would be the dog's prints, varying in pace. though, usually beside Cooper's.

the sun was unforgiving, beating down on you violently as you walked. your anger slowly dimmed down as your mind drifts to the memories you tried so hard to forget.

your eyes flit around the forest, looking across bushes, looking through the dirt, anything. but you were surprisingly stumped. you had tracked what seemed to be a deer for a little over half an hour.

you came to a halt and huffed as you roll your shoulders. "okay i give up," you turn around and find Cooper smiling at you with those lovestruck eyes. you laugh at his look, his smile only widens at the sound. "what?" you smile.

he shakes his head, "nothing honey," he walks over and pecks your cheek. "you got us really far, you're really getting the hang of this." he compliments, and steps in front of you to take the lead.

he looks around for a minute, before he taps your hand to get your attention. "see there?" he points to a shrub. "more bite marks," he says, and you huff. he smiles and gestures you to continue in front of him again. "c'mon, i've got the feeling we're getting close."

huh, you cocked your head at the sight before you. Wilzig's body, surrounded by blood, and missing his head. you swallowed, would Cooper have done this? or did the girl do it to lighten her load?

you hoped Cooper didn't do this, yet you also doubted the Vault Dweller would have the stomach for something like this. you look around, eyes meeting the tracks of the girl, then Cooper's along with the dog's. well, you sighed, let's keep this show on the road.

you missed Roosevelt now more than ever, his gentle patter beside you as he followed you around. he used to love following you around while you did chores around the house — laid beside you while you ironed clothes, politely sat out of the way while you vacuumed. his favorite thing was to run around the yard while you hung up your laundry outside.

your heart ached for your fluffy companion, you missed him so much. you wondered if Cooper missed him too, or more so how much.

Cooper and Roosevelt were inseparable, when Cooper was home Roosevelt rarely left his side. and when Cooper was away, Roosevelt never left yours, almost as if Cooper told him to guard you.

the thought made you smile, sighing as you walked along the trail of steps. you hated this fucking wasteland and it's violently cruel sun.

the lush surroundings a upcoming Hollywood Boulevard were a nice change of pace, it was good to see that while some areas were completely infertile and dead, other areas absolutely thrived.

the tracks showed slight panic on the Vault Dwellers side, quick dashes and marks where it looked like she had slipped or fallen. Cooper's were calm and collected as ever, and the dog's jumped around all over the place, before evening out beside Cooper again.

you walked along the waters edge, keeping a close eye on the lake beside you. you had heard stories of huge things jumping out, and being caught by something while this close to Cooper was not on your to-do list today.

you were close to them, you could tell by the depth and freshness of the prints. you let put a shaky breath, your original frustration bubbling up to the surface again. your hands shook a little beside you. you had some time to think of what you were going to say, but now that you were nearing them your brain was drawing blanks.

"honey look!" Cooper whispered, pulling you down behind a tree, pointing into the distance. you followed his finger, eyes landing on a deer grazing fifteen or twenty feet from you two.

your eyes lit up, "hey i did it!" you whispered excitedly. Cooper grinned, rubbing a warm hand across your lower back in a form of 'i'm proud'. and he was damn proud, it took him much longer the first time he went hunting.

"well," he takes ahold of his rifle, handing it to you. you grab it from him, positioning it the way he taught you. "breathe in and out," he muttered, his hand not leaving your lower back. he looked over your shoulder, seeing how you were aiming. "and well, you know what to do," he smiles.

you smile at his words and the warm hand inching towards your waist. you take a deep breath, looking down the sight as you aimed, your finger wrapping around the trigger. you exhaled slowly, and squeezed the cold trigger, letting your shot fly.

the sound of panicked shouting snapped you out of the memory, eyes snapping towards what looked to be an old dock. you swing your rifle off your back and hold it tight, stepping through the overgrown environment and closer towards the yelling.

the closer you got, the more clear the voice became, "i lost it! okay i lost it!" the Vault Dweller shouted, fear and exhaustion clear in her voice.

you neared the edge of the forest, the rest beyond flattening into a open space by the water. you could see the Vault Dweller and Cooper clearly now, as well as the dog who barked at the water with vigor. Cooper had is gun aimed no more than a few inches from the Vault Dweller's face.

the dog suddenly snapped it's head up, snout pointing directly to where you were. well, you thought, it was a matter of time.

Cooper looked at the dog, who had completely stopped barking now. the girl didn't turn to look at the dog, seizing the opportunity to kick Cooper's legs out from under him and shoot up and away from him, her gun now pointed at him.

"you better get that gun out of his face, girl, or you'll regret it."

Cooper's head spun around, wide eyes looking around. a small wave of 'oh shit' washing over him. the Vault Dweller turned to face you, eyes widening. "you, from back in Filly," she spoke, her voice sounding a little out of breath.

"what'd i say?" you cocked your rifle, "get that gun out of his face." anger boiling back up at the sight of him on the ground. he deserved that kick.

the girl blinked, reluctantly holstering her gun and stepping away from Cooper. your rifle remained aimed at him though, as you stepped closer to him. Cooper blinked, an awkward smile on his lips. "hey, fancy seein' you 'round here-" the thud of the butt of your rifle against his temple interrupting him. "fuckin' hell!" he shouted, a hand coming up to cradle his head. he looked up at you, and eyeing the rage in your eyes. "okay i deserved that,"

the Vault Dweller watched the exchange from a short distance, standing beside the dog who had returned it's attention to the water.

"get the fuck up." you seethed, rifle still aimed at his scarred head. Cooper inhaled, slowly getting up, then standing before you. you only swung your rifle over your shoulder once he stood at his full height, dark eyes watching your every move. 

his lips parted to speak, but you beat him to it with a smack that rang through the overgrown area. Cooper’s head reeling back at the force. he blinked widely for a moment before turning his head back to face you.

the Vault Dweller watched with her lips parted as you had smacked him, the sound sending a jolt through her. who the hell were you that he let you do this? if it were her she'd be dead as soon as she began to raise her hand.

you raised your hand again, this time jabbing a finger into his leather clad chest. "Cooper Franklin Howard, what the fuck were you thinking?!" you shouted at him, wild eyes staring into his gaunt ones. "fucking tying me up? are you out of your goddamn mind?!" Cooper looked pained, he regretted tying you up then, but even more so now.

he looked down a little, and you grabbed his chin and forced him to look at you. "what the fuck was one of our vows, huh?" your voice cracked a little at the volume. you let go of his thickly scarred chin to yank him down to your level by the lapels of his duster. "where you go, i go, Cowpoke!" you yelled at him, tears started to well up in your eyes.

Cooper swallowed, eyes flitting across your face. his heart ached at the thought of the wedding, the vows said and the love shared. it hurt.

you shook him by his lapels once more, "i don't care where the fuck you go, but unless you're dead i'm there with you!" your voice starting to falter as tears slide down your cheeks. oh how he hated to see you cry, it cracked his broken heart into even more pieces.

you stood there for a second, wet eyes watching his as you could just barely see tears starting to prick at his as well. you watched him closely as he pulled off his thick leather gloves and dropped them, calloused and scarred hands coming up to cover yours. Cooper visibly shuddered once his bare hands met your painfully soft ones.

the Vault Dweller silently watches, eyes wide as she sees the emotional love in Cooper's eyes. what the fuck happened to the terrifying ghoul that was about to shoot her?

your breath hitched as he held your hands, eyes flitting down to them. they looked exactly like the skin on his face, an angry red, completely blistered and scarred over. you looked at all his features, his gaunt eyes, his thinned lips, yellow teeth. and the blaringly obvious, his missing nose.

"oh Cooper," you rasped, your voice aching from the yelling. you pulled a hand free from his and pressed it against the scarred cheek you had smacked. he didn't flinch as you gently rubbed your thumb across his cheek. he whispered your name as though it hurt to say, a tear finally rolling down his skin.

you reach your other hand up, holding both sides of his face as you pull him down and press your lips against his. Cooper tries to step back a little, taken by surprise, but your hold on his face doesn't let him move far. it takes him a second, as if he thinks this is a dream, before his reaches one hand to hold your face and the other to pull you closer by your waist.

the Vault Dweller watches with slight disgust, but also with a small thought of awe.

you finally let go against him, tears rolling freely down your cheeks and wetting his as you cry against into the kiss. although he looks different and feels different, the waves of comfort and safety feel exactly the same as they always have as he holds you tight.

you reluctantly pull away, looking up at him with teary eyes. you press one last kiss against his lips before fully pulling away, his hand holding yours as if he can't let go. "what on earth did you get yourself into cowboy?" you sigh sadly, your hand returning to his cheek.

Cooper shakes his head, "you don't wanna know," he replies, the sigh palpable.

the Vault Dweller blinks as the dog starts barking like crazy again, "uh guys, i'd hate to interrupt this shockingly sweet moment but i think the Gulper's coming back!" she panics, looking at her pipboy as you hear the tell tale geiger counter sound picking up immensely.

Cooper looks back to you, hand on his gun. "you still remember what i taught you?" he asks, unholstering his gun.

you roll your eyes with a smile, "i'll make you wish i'd forgotten," as you swing your rifle off your shoulder, ready for a fight.

you'd have a long talk once you were in a somewhat safe shelter later..

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[ateliersss]

Downtime and a Bath

Pairing: Yautja x Fem!Reader Summary: Your mate returns from a hunt, in desperate need of a bath. Cross-posted on AO3: here Warnings: English isn't my first language Word Count: 1.823 Before the Blooming Family series

⇨ I'm not exactly happy with it, nor am I sure if it's even worth publishing, but anyways, here it is. I had an idea three hours ago and wrote the thing in two, therefore the poor quality. But hey, at least it's out of my head.

⇨ Also. thank you to each and everyone of you for letting me reach a 1.000 followers a few weeks ago!

It was nighttime.

Lounging on your nest, you tilted your head back and looked out of the window behind you. Upside down, the twin moons, twinkling stars, and other celestial bodies you couldn’t name were occupying the bottom of your view while the wildlife with its mountains and forests extended across the top of your eyesight.

You sighed at the inky-black sky. Mi’ytiar had told you hours ago his hunting trip would end today and you had hoped it would be at a time you were awake. But according to the moons, the night was already half over and you knew you would soon pass out from exhaustion.

Maybe you could rest your eyes for a little bit. There was no problem with that, right? You were already lying in such a comfortable position — the cushions underneath you supporting your body just right, the blanket keeping it neither too warm nor too cold, the pillows behind your head cradling it perfectly. You could just close your eyes and listen to the crackling of the fire around your nest. No shame in that.

You were just dozing off, losing the inner battle against the overwhelming fatigue, when you heard a dull thud that was muffled by the closed door that led to the main area of your home.

“Wha…” You mumbled and pushed yourself up with your eyes still half-closed.

Seconds later, the door slid open and revealed the imposing sight of your mate.

So he was finally home. It made you breathe out a happy sigh and a drowsy smile etched itself onto your lips. You felt instantly at ease at having your mate back home and by your side. Not that you ever felt in danger being without him on the grounds of his clan, but you could never know who or what could force its way into your home when Mi’ytiar was gone. However, you doubted that they could make it far to you. Not only did your mate have his loyal warriors who had their eyes on you when he wasn’t able to himself, but the three Hell Hounds outside would rip anyone with bad intentions apart.

You rubbed your eyes until Mi’ytiar became less blurry and you let them wander over his figure, noting the state he was in. He was covered in dirt, grime, and what you hoped wasn’t his blood. As much as off-putting his appearance was, you were pleased to see that he complied with your wish to keep whatever corpse he had kept as a trophy away from your bedroom and instead leave it on the table in the main room.

You were just about to open your mouth when you flinched back at the intensity with which he was stalking towards you, embodying every aspect of his predatory nature, eyeing you like his next prey.

“No, Mi’ytiar. Don’t you dare!” You protested when it became obvious he was about to climb on your nest, dirtying it with whatever disgusting fluids his body was covered in.

But he didn’t listen, his mind hazy with hunger and overcome by the lasting high of his latest kills. Bad Bloods were a nice challenge and he was thrilled when he discovered three of them hunting on a neighboring planet. Their heads were now lying on the sleek black surface of the table outside.

You yelped when his bone-crushing weight settled on top of you, successfully covering your whole body with his, and his face buried itself in the crook of your neck. You could hear and feel the greedy intake of your scent through his nose. His tongue licked over every inch of your skin nearby as his hands roamed your body, his claws already ripping on the fabric of your nightwear.

You would have spread your legs for him, would have helped him take off your clothing, offering every part of your body for him to take, to devour, if the fact that he was just ruining the materials you had used for your nest wasn’t the only thing on your mind right down. As well as the disgusting stench that overwhelmed your nostrils and made you gag.

You weren’t the most flexible, definitely not now, but you still managed to pull up your knee and push him away from you by placing your foot in the middle of his chest. You knew you wouldn’t have succeeded if not a subconscious part of his mind was still able to obey you even though his logical thinking was clouded with primal need.

Mi’ytiar, though very reluctantly, backed down and sat back on his haunches. His claws dug into his thighs and his chest was heaving with heavy breaths, showing how much strength it required for him to hold himself back.

“I’m sorry, my love, but you reek.” You grumbled and eyed him in disdain.

He only growled back.

“Why don’t we take a bath, hm?” You suggested with a head tilt to the door to your right which led to what you would call a bathroom by human standards.

Sliding sideways off the nest, you walked backward, a smirk on your face and your eyes fixed on him as your fingers fiddled with the knot of your robe, a souvenir you had acquired from one of your trips to Earth.

“Are you coming, tanhì?” You asked him, placing one foot behind the other.

The swishing of the door and the different feeling of the floor covering signaled you had entered the bathroom. The first time you had been inside it when Mi’ytiar had shown you your new home, it reminded you of a cave. Despite the usual futuristic and modern Yautja aesthetic, this room had a natural feeling. It wasn’t unlike the bathroom of the apartment you had lived in with your family decades ago. The necessities had been there. Except for a bathtub. Yautja didn’t necessarily bathe. They swam, yes, but bathe?

You didn’t exactly need a bathtub as you hadn’t used the one you had back then, but after a tiring day, it had been nice to relax in the hot water. Someday you had voiced your displeasure to Mi’ytiar who had scooped you up and taken you to the hot springs not far from the clan grounds but still inside his territory. And although the sight of it was breathtaking — steam rising from the ponds of water arranged like stair steps so the water could run down from one spring to the next like a waterfall — and the surrounding nature was quite romantic, you weren’t exactly comfortable stripping naked where whatever lurking creature could creep up on you.

You didn’t want to complain, of course, and you would eventually adapt to the fact that you had to forego certain human comforts. That didn’t mean you didn’t share how humans lived compared to Yautja with him whenever a difference in their everyday life occurred; be it the bed, clothes, or the bathtub.

Just as you were getting used to bathing in the hot springs, hidden in the rock crevice, you stumbled over the beginnings of what would soon look like a pool when you walked into the bathroom to relieve yourself. It was nestled into the large niche — square, three meters by three meters — of the room opposite the door where the shower-like setup used to be. When you had asked him what this was about, he had only said “Home.” and left it by that.

Standing in front of said pool, you turned your head to look over your shoulder and watched as the door closed behind Mi’ytiar who had just entered the bathroom. You let the robe slide down your shoulders and to the crook of your arms before letting it pool at your feet. When you turned to face him, you revealed the side profile of your body to his eyes, the swell of your breasts, and the small bump your belly was sporting.

When you thought back to your profession on Earth, you looked like any expectant mother in the late stage of her first trimester. Your baby bump wasn’t that big yet, but you still had to give up on certain items of clothing because they already wouldn’t fit you anymore.

When your belly started to grow, you suddenly remembered that your period should have started roughly two weeks ago. The second your brain had fully comprehended that your mate could have possibly impregnated you, that with the highest probability you carried the product of your mutual love under your heart and that you would soon become a mother, you didn’t waste a second to track him down and tell him the big news.

He hadn’t exactly reacted the way you had hoped. Instead of a positive or negative reaction, instead of pressing his forehead to yours while purring or growling at you to get rid of it, he had just stared. He stood frozen in front of you and fixed your hands that cupped the barely noticeable swell of your stomach.

You had just gained a little bit weight, he told himself. She couldn’t be pregnant, she couldn’t carry my pup.

How could you, a human, be able to achieve something where others had failed?

He needed answers, so he hastily but carefully picked you up and took you to Cahrein who only confirmed your suspicion. You were indeed pregnant.

Only after a quick talk with the tribal healer, something about “not possible” and “how”, he finally showed you how he really felt — overjoyed. And how could he not? Now that you were carrying his pup, you were connected to your mate in every possible way.

“Are you coming?” You asked him again, one foot dipped into the warm water.

Mi’ytiar didn’t waste any more time to get rid of his armor, not caring about any damage he may cause as he ripped every piece of it off his body, letting it fall to the ground as he walked to the pool. When he stepped into it, your body was already fully immersed and you swam to where you kept the nourishing oils, sweet-smelling soap, and the washcloth. With everything you needed in hand, you returned to where Mi’ytiar had settled on the bench of the pool. You freed your hands by placing everything on the edge so you could lift yourself up on his lap. Mi’ytiar immediately pulled you closer, one hand wrapped around your thigh, the other embracing your bump.

You didn’t talk while you cleaned him up. You stayed quiet, not feeling the necessity to talk, while he relished in your pampering, only voicing how much he enjoyed it with purrs. And when you were done, you snuggled up to him, cheek pressed against his chest and arms loosely wrapped around him. Mi’ytiar later had to carry you out of the pool, dry you off, and bring you to bed, your sleeping form pressed against his body.

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[milkteabinniechan]

♡Storms & Sirens - Hyunjin

MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY MEMBERSHIP//M.LIST

pairing: merman! Hyunjin x fem! reader

summary: Mermaids are the mystery of the sea, with few humans ever seeing one. You are the dread pirate queen of the Barbados, a legend that a certain merman has always wanted to meet.

warnings: mentions of claws, sharp teeth, webbed hands

"You're the one they call the Pirate Queen aren't ya? the dreaded queen of the sea?”

You stilled as the deep voice carried across the water. You squinted your eyes out at the blue horizon but there was no other ship in sight. Behind you, your crew continued to grunt and heave as they pulled their oars in unison with one another. You and your crew mates had pulled a small dingy from your ship and were making your way to a nearby island for supplies. You feared the summer sun had finally consumed you when you heard the faint sounds of slapping accompanied by a playful laugh.

“Who goes there?!” You shouted, your hand already brushing against the hilt of your haltered sword.

He swims closer, his fins propelling him through the water with ease, he looks up at you with a pair of bright yellow eyes, a mix of curiosity and admiration.

"I've heard so many stories about you, Pirate Queen. They say you're ruthless, cunning, and beautiful. Which one is true?”

Your eyes widen at the sight of sharp teeth and glistening scales that cascade beautifully down a toned chest and abdomen. His tail captured the moonlight with a haunting and hypnotizing shine. Fully embracing the possibility of this gorgeous creature being a hallucination, you decide to indulge it.

“All be true, fish man. All be true.” You spoke proudly, puffing your chest out slightly.

He chuckles, a deep rumbling sound that vibrates through the water. He reaches out a hand, his claws gleaming in the moonlight, and gently touches your arm.

"Fish man?" he repeats, a smile playing on his lips. "I prefer merman, Pirate Queen.”

Your body tenses at the sight of your claws. The feeling of the sharp cartilage scraping across your skin. This was no hallucination. You had never witnessed something so beautiful and so deadly. You look back at your crew but they are still focused on rowing. You glance back down at the merman then to the horizon, where a small piece of land floats just out of view. “See there, merman? We be dockin’ there. Need to replenish food and water. Do you know of the island?”

He nods. "Ah, I know it. Small, uninhabited except for the wildlife. Perfect for pirates to dock unnoticed." He retracts his claws and flexes his webbed fingers. "I can swim ahead, scout it out for you. Ensure it's safe?” He offers; a coy smile still pulling at his lips.

You tilt your head, hesitation blatantly plastered on your face. But you know that pirates before you have sent out less reliable mates to scout ahead. You weighed the options in your head for a moment before giving the mythic creature a firm nod.

he grinned wide, his teeth glinting in the moonlight, then dived beneath the waves. His powerful tail propelled him forward as he swam towards the island. Hours passed as your dinghy finally approached the island. He resurfaced beside the dinghy, water cascading down his scales. He rested both arms on the edge of the smooth grain wood of the small ship. You give him a grateful smile as you and your crew step onto the sand of the beach and pull the dinghy ashore. The sound of the ocean swept through the air. The salt of the sea clung to your hair and clothes. The island's temperature was a scorching difference from the water, causing you to remove some layers of heavier clothing. The soft, white linen shirt that remained billowed in the wind.

The merman dragged himself onto the sand, his tail thrashing behind him. He propped himself up on his elbows and looked at you, his eyes roaming over your body appreciatively.

"The island is safe, Pirate Queen. No signs of other humans. Wildlife is abundant."

You nod firmly as you can yourself from the intense jungle heat.

“Thank you, merman. I have my gratitude.”

He watches you fan yourself, his gaze lingering on your face before he glances around the beach.

"You could offer me something more than just gratitude, Pirate Queen. Perhaps a token of your appreciation?" He asks, his voice low and husky. "Something to wear around my neck?”

Your eyes sparkle at his request. Now he was speaking your language. Doing a favor for the promise of treasure was something you always understood, even as a child. Your small smile turned to a generous grin.

“Aye. So it's treasure you be after, is it? I may have just what you want.”

You reach into a small sack attached to your hip to reveal a long, gold chain with a large aquamarine pendant dangling from the end. You hold it close to the creature's face. You watch his perfect features contort and change from pessimistic to astonishment. His eyes widen at the sight of the pendant, his pupils dilating. He reached out slowly, his claws retracting as he took the chain from you. "It's beautiful... like the sea," he whispered, his voice filled with awe. He looks back at you, his gaze intense.

He clasps the pendant around his neck, the aquamarine stone resting against his chest. He propped himself up more, his tail swishing against the tide rushing back and forth.

"Now, Pirate Queen, May I request one more reward?”

“More? Greed for treasure will only consume you, merman. Trust me.” You warn, your voice taking a more serious tone.

He leans up close to you, his clawed hand cradling the back of your head.

"A kiss. For a merman who's never known the touch of a human woman, a kiss from the legendary Pirate Queen would be worth more than any treasure." He grinned.

Your brow furrowed and a shiver traveled through your body at the feeling of his webbed fingers on the back of your neck. Your eyes locked onto his as you felt your body instinctively moving closer and closer to his mouth. You fall to your knees into the sand, your faces now inches from one another. The merman leaned down and he closed the distance, pressing his lips against yours in a firm, possessive kiss. His arms wrap around your waist, holding you close as he explores your mouth with his tongue.

“Ah, you taste even better than I imagined.” He breaks the kiss, panting slightly.

You pull back as well, only slightly with his arms still snaked around your waist. You search his face, taking in his ethereal features. The mixture of human and sea swirled around his skin like an intimate dance of creation. Your eyes had never witnessed something so unique, a living, breathing treasure.

“Let me ask you something now.” You whispered. “Do you have a name?”

He tail slaps against the wet sand, his eyes widening with excitement as he parted his lips to speak.

“Hyunjin. My name is Hyunjin.”

You repeat his name, Hyunjin as the sand hugs the two of you in a warm embrace. Hyunjin rests his forehead against yours, his eyes gleaming with curiosity and something else.

“Tell me, what's it like being a legend? Do people worship you? Fear you?”

You ponder for a moment. An intimate moment such as this was not something gifted often to a ruthless pirate like yourself.

“I suppose a bit of both. I've had men desperate to destroy me and to have me in bed.”

Hyunjin’s arms tighten around your waist possessively. He nuzzles your neck, his gills fluttering against your skin.

"Well, I want both. I want to destroy any who dare threaten you, and I want you in my bed, Pirate Queen.”

You moved in again for another kiss. You were sure what made you want to kiss him again. But the taste of him was everything that drew you to this life in the first place. He kissed you back hard. As if you would wash away with the tide if he let you go. The kiss lasted longer than the first. Soon, you heard the familiar boot stomps of your crew mates returning from the hunt. You sighed deeply and stood up from the beach, adjusting your clothes and brushing away the sand.

You helped your mates load the dinghy full of fresh fruits, wild boar and fish. You reluctantly pushed the modestly sized boat back into the ocean and hopped inside. You glanced back at the shore, hoping to see your merman, your treasure. But where the two of you once lay, there was only sand and shells. You turned your eyes back towards the horizon, rolling your shoulders and considering the fact that you may be delusional. When suddenly the recognizable sound of water slapping unevenly against wood caught your attention. You leaned over the edge quickly to see a shimmering face bobbing up out of the waves.

“Where are we off too now, Captain?” Hyunjin hummed softly.

It seemed that you had become his precious treasure as well. And he would become greedy for it.

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[kwanisms]

Unbearable — s.changbin

» stray kids menu | changbin menu | kinktober masterlist «

➮ werebear!Changbin × f!Reader wc: 8.9k summary: Changbin is a very reserved person. He tries to live a solitary and quiet life but after moving into a small studio apartment in what he thought was a quiet block of the city, his neighbor soon puts him to the test when she is extremely welcoming and outgoing. genres/themes/au: angst (heavy on this), fluff (again u gotta squint), smut; supernatural and lycanthropic themes, s2l, n2l; non idol au, supernatural au, werebear au warnings: adult dialogue, female reader, alcohol consumption, thoughts of self doubt and self loathing, self isolation as a coping technique, mention of death, sexual content (18+ mdni), see smut warnings under the cut! taglist has been moved to reblogs join my taglist! kinktober 2024 taglist is CLOSED! Strikethrough means I cannot tag you. MINORS WILL BE BLACKLISTED & BLOCKED. AGELESS BLOGS WILL NOT BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST.

a/n: i am so sorry this took so long to get done and posted! i just lost steam for writing a lot of longer oneshots but thankfully, i got that steam back and now Kinktober 2023 can finally come to a close! Thank you so much for those of you that have been patiently waiting for this and you will be getting a sequel to this part very very soon! Thank you so much for reading and as always, this is a work of fiction and all characters are not reflective of their respective irl counterparts. for entertainment purposes only.

smut warnings: teratophilia (aka monsterfucking), protected sex (it’s rushed and spur of the moment but at least Changbin uses his goddamn brain lmao), oral (both receiving), fingering (f receiving), strength kink, choking, body worship, facesitting (m receiving), use of pet names (baby, bunny, etc), power bottom!Changbin, sub!Reader, Binnie is a strong boy and Y/N really appreciates it and they are both kind of drunk off each other's presences. If I missed anything let me know! dialogue prompt: ❛ Don’t cover your mouth, I want everyone to know how good I make you feel. ❜

═══════════════════════════════════════════════════════

The thing Changbin hated the most about his… condition, was having to move whenever things got complicated. His intense dislike of moving started as a child, moving from place to place because of his father’s work. He was in his final year of high school on a camping trip with some friends when the unthinkable happened.

Changbin wanted to try something new. He’d been camping in almost all the parks in Korea and wanted to go somewhere different. They decided to try Jirisan National Park. Most campers avoided the area due to the black pear population but Changbin’s friends were confident in their preparations.

They agreed to spend a week in the park; fishing, camping, hiking, and seeing the sights.

Most of the wildlife they encountered were small critters like squirrels and chipmunks and the occasional deer. Until their last night in the park.

Changbin had gotten up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and while doing his business, was attacked by a bear. It bit him, teeth tearing into the flesh of his arm. His scream alerted his friends who came to his rescue, scaring the creature off with mace.

Changbin was in and out of it from the shock and loss of blood but his friends later relayed to him that they called the ranger station on their radio and a helicopter was sent to airlift him to the nearest hospital. He was rushed into surgery and thankfully his arm was salvageable.

Changbin was lucky to be alive and he knew it. 

It was a month later when he realized things had changed forever.

The bear that had attacked him was no ordinary bear but was a werebear and Changbin had been cursed. He had been living with that curse for the last several years.

For the most part, he was able to keep to himself and keep his condition under wraps but occasionally, he slipped up and had to move which was the case yet again. He’d changed in view of one of his neighbors and had to make plans upon learning his secret had been discovered.

He found a new place, a small studio apartment on the outskirts of the city. Changbin’s goal was to find a place in the country but land was expensive.

He’d moved into the apartment, keeping to himself as he moved his things in. The apartment had come empty so he had to buy furniture to fill it and had spent an entire day building his own furniture alone. It wasn’t much but it was his and he’d have to make it home.

He had hoped to get through his two year lease without incident and left alone but his hopes were dashed when he ran into his neighbor who lived across the hall, Y/N. You were the opposite of him. Where Changbin was quiet, shy, and reserved you were bubbly and outgoing.

You had come back from running errands when you ran into him at the mailbox and immediately introduced yourself. Changbin was sure he had come off as very rude in this interaction but you didn’t seem to take it to heart, greeting him each time you saw him with a big smile.

You had told him that if he needed anything to not hesitate to ask and that you were happy to help.

You often brought him food, making too much for one person to eat and often gave him some of your leftovers. Changbin felt rude if he didn’t accept it and he didn’t want to hurt your feelings. The food was good, he wasn’t going to lie and say it sucked. He just wanted to be left alone.

You were far too friendly and more generous than he was used to or felt he deserved.

He was working from home one afternoon, close to his heat, when he heard a knock on his door and got up from his desk to answer it. Peering through the peephole, he saw you standing on the other side of the door and sighed softly. He unlocked the door, removing the chain and pulled the door open just enough to peek out.

“Hey,” you said softly. Changbin could hear music coming from one of the apartments upstairs. “Hey,” he replied softly. In your hands, you held another tupperware container. “I made some stew,” you started, glancing down at the container. “And I made too much,” you continued. “Again.”

“I uh… I thought you might like some,” you said with an uncertain smile.

Changbin forced a smile and pulled the door open some more. “That’s very kind of you,” he said softly as you handed the container over. “I keep finding recipes for families,” you added. “Too many servings for one person.” Changbin nodded as you spoke.

“I’m sure you’re busy,” you noted and smiled at him. “I’ll leave you alone.” Changbin hesitated, wanting to say thank you but you turned and crossed the hall back to your door, entering your apartment and shutting the door.

He looked down at the stew and sighed again. 

The last time you had come over to bring him food, he’d just come out of a transformation and had snapped at you. He’d been irritable, unwell, and frustrated with his situation and when you offered him some of your extra chicken, he snapped at you, slamming the door in your face.

Despite that, you were still bringing him food and being nice to him. He felt awful as he closed his door. Even after being so rude and mean, going as far to slam the door in your face, you still thought of him and brought him extra food.

He set the container on his counter and stared at it for a few moments before sitting back down at his computer and opening a new tab on his browser. He’d decided to make it up to you. He typed away, looking up gifts to give neighbors.

He managed to find a few good articles before he got up, grabbing his apartment keys and pulling on his jacket. He headed over to the town center, finding a garden center. From the various interactions he’d had with you in the past, you always mentioned your love for plants.

Your apartment was apparently decorated with them.

Changbin didn’t know much about plants but nonetheless, he returned home with a small potted plant. A little light green succulent. He hoped you’d like it.

The next day, he had to go into work so he wasn’t able to give you your gift and by the time he arrived home and knocked on your door, either you were asleep or out as it was a Friday night.

That night, he heard you come home and upon peering out of the peephole saw that you weren’t alone. You had a friend with you and Changbin knew he couldn’t apologize just yet. Maybe in the morning but the next morning you didn’t answer your door.

For a whole week, you didn’t answer any of his knocks nor did he see you.

Finally, when he was getting his mail from the mailbox downstairs, you returned. Changbin felt relieved as you entered the building. He was starting to get worried. You didn’t greet him with a usual smile when you saw him. Instead you quietly got your mail, a week's worth of it, and headed up the stairs without even looking at him.

Changbin followed from a distance, glancing over as you unlocked your door and let yourself into your apartment, not even sparing him a first or second glance as the door shut softly. It made his heart ache that he’d clearly scared you off enough to limit your contact with him.

More determined than ever, Changbin returned to his apartment and grabbed the plant with the envelope that contained a handwritten apology addressed to you where he apologized profusely for the way he acted and that while it was no excuse, he’d just gotten over a bad bout of the flu and wasn’t feeling well when he snapped at you. It wasn’t as much as you deserved but Changbin had never been very good with confrontation.

He set the plant on your welcome mat with the envelope front and center with the word ‘sorry’ written across the front of it. He stood back up and knocked three times loudly before retreating to his apartment and shutting the door.

He peered through the peephole, hoping to see you appear. Luck was on his side as your door opened slowly, your head appearing and looking around before your head turned down, noticing the plant. You opened the door fully, leaning out to look down the hall. As you knelt down to look at the plant, Changbin watched as you lifted the letter and looked at it.

He saw your gaze briefly look up at his door and though he knew you couldn’t possibly see him watching you, it made him nervous anyway. He watched as you grabbed the potted plant and stood up straight, plant in one hand, his letter in the other. You retreated to your apartment, shutting the door and Changbin sighed a breath of relief.

He decided to go back to his work, hoping he might hear from you later.

Around dinner time, Changbin’s stomach growled and he got up from his desk, hanging his headphones around his neck as he walked down the hall from his studio to the kitchen to open the fridge. He cursed softly as he saw he didn’t really have much in the way of a meal in his fridge. Another forgotten grocery trip meant ramen again.

He shut the fridge and opened a cabinet, grabbing a pot to make his ramen in and as he moved to the sink to fill it with water, there were three loud knocks at his door. He dropped the pan in the sink with a metallic clang and hurried over to the door, hoping he might see your face when he looked through the peephole but he was met with an empty hallway.

His heart sank and he stepped back, unlocking the door and opening it slightly. His eyes immediately fell to a pot with a lid sitting on his mat with a small card. He opened the door and bent down to pick up the card to read it.

‘Apology accepted but only if you eat all of this! ~ Y/N’

He looked down at the pot and carefully picked it up by the handles. It was hot. He looked up at your door before retreating into his apartment, shutting the door with his foot. He carried the pot over to the kitchen island and set it down. He read the card once more, turning it over to find a small smiley face.

He smiled to himself, setting the card down and lifted the lid to find what he could only assume was budae jjigae. There were slices of spam, sausages cut into small pieces, ramen noodles, mushrooms, fish cake, and rice cake in a spicy broth topped with cheese and chopped green onions. It smelled amazing and Changbin couldn’t help but feel a small sense of guilt at how he’d previously treated you.

He glanced at the card once more before he moved to grab a pair of chopsticks and a spoon. You had offered to accept his apology but only if he ate everything and he wasn’t about to let this meal you’d made specifically for him go to waste.

A week had passed by and while Changbin hadn’t seen or spoken to you face to face, he could feel that whatever tension there was between you had dissipated. You had accepted his gift and he, yours. Things were almost back to normal.

His heat loomed a couple days away when he went to the gym to burn off some steam. It was never enough to fully satiate his needs but it was the best he could do since he wasn’t seeing anyone, nor was he about to go looking.

As he was working on his usual set, he heard the door open and a familiar scent hit his nose, making his heart rate increase more than the current workout. He turned his head and saw you walk over towards the elliptical. He turned his head back, internally panicking. He could tell by your scent that you were close to ovulating and it was sending him into overstimulation.

He didn’t want to end his workout early, but he knew if he kept going, he was going to do something he would regret and could possibly get him and you arrested. He finished his set quickly and got up, moving to grab the spray bottle and a few paper towels to wipe down the machine.

He returned the bottle to its stand, tossing the used paper towels away and grabbed his things, heading for the door. He glanced over at you which proved to be a terrible mistake. You were stretching before getting on the elliptical which was a good practice Changbin noted but you were bent over, ass on full display in your leggings. 

Changbin was no stranger to your figure. He was used to seeing you in dresses, skirts, or sometimes an oversize sweater and leggings but seeing you in form fitting athletic gear was something he was not used to. He wasn’t used to how it hugged your curves, outlining everything about your body he found insanely attractive.

He was so busy staring at your ass that he ran right into the trash bin beside the door with a loud bang that echoed in the otherwise small gym. You stood up and turned to look at him, an expression of confusion and concern on your face as he put the trash bin back, cheeks burning as he glanced back at you, giving you a nod before he quickly exited the gym, heading for the stairs.

He was glad there was no one else in the room and that no one had actually seen him run into the trash can. How embarrassing would that have been?

Changbin made it to his floor and entered his apartment. He showered and changed into clean clothes before heading to the kitchen. He’d actually gone grocery shopping this time and as he was browsing his fridge, he heard his phone ding from the kitchen island. Closing the fridge, he walked over to pick up the device, unlocking it and checking his messages.

It was a text from you and it sent his heart into a frenzy before remembering you had exchanged numbers shortly after he moved in because your packages kept getting delivered to his box instead of yours. It had been a while since then and your mail had gotten sorted out but he genuinely forgot he even had your number as he read the text.

Y/N Neighbor: hey, is everything alright? That sounded painful ):

Changbin grimaced. ‘Sounded?’ he wondered. ‘That means she didn’t see it. Good.’ He quickly typed a response.

Changbin: yeah! I wasn’t watching where I was going. Too busy looking at my phone 😅i’m ok tho 🙂

Your response was swift.

Y/N Neighbor: okay good. I was worried. Y/N Neighbor: hey, while I have your attention. Do you have plans for dinner?

Changbin chuckled, typing his response.

Changbin: why? you gonna leave another pot of stew on my door mat? Y/N Neighbor: no 😭i was actually wondering if you’d like to come over for dinner Y/N Neighbor: I got some really nice beef short ribs from the butcher and was planning to make some tteokgalbi. I found a recipe and wanted to give it a shot

A grin spread across Changbin’s face as he read your text.

Y/N Neighbor: and who better to ask than my only Korean neighbor? Y/N Neighbor: So how about it? Y/N Neighbor: Do you want to come over for dinner?

Changbin hesitated answering as he stared at his phone. On one hand, he would love nothing more than to come over and help teach you how to make one of his favorite dishes, eat together, and enjoy your company but on the other hand, he knew that he was tempting fate, being alone with you so close to his heat. He weighed the pros and cons but very quickly, his logic was beat out by the promise of beef short ribs.

Changbin: sure. I’d love to. What time?

He sent the message and waited for your response. It took a couple moments but he saw the read receipt appear and soon you were typing your response.

Y/N Neighbor: I’m almost finished in the gym and I’ll have to shower. So let’s say… 7PM?

He smiled before typing back, thumbs tapping against the screen of his phone.

Changbin: perfect. See you at 7 (:

Changbin stressed over what to wear as this wasn’t exactly a formal setting like a date but you had still invited him to dinner at your place and you were going to be making food but he would be helping so he opted for something comfortable. Black pants, a white tee, and a gray sweatshirt. He scoured his fridge and pantry for something to bring with and settled on an unopened bottle of wine in his fridge that he received as a parting gift when he left Korea.

With the bottle of wine in hand, he headed across the hall. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door, resisting the urge to run and hide. He heard footsteps approach the door and after unlocking, the door opened to reveal your smile. “Hi,” you said breathlessly. Changbin returned the greeting and you opened the door wider to let him in.

He stepped over the threshold awkwardly, holding the bottle of wine tightly as he entered your apartment. It was smaller than his but you had a studio while he had a two bedroom. In the entryway you had tile flooring much like his and a shoe rack stood against the wall with various pairs of shoes from running shoes to much dressier shoes like pumps. There were even a couple pairs of boots.

Hanging over the shoe rack was a shelf that went from one wall to the other in the small entryway. On top of the shelf were various storage items inside pleasant looking boxes with drawers and small printed labels on the front detailing what was inside. On the underside of the shelf was a bar where you jackets hung including one heavy winter coat and various scarves for different temperatures.

Beside the shoe rack was a small bench with a cream and brown striped cushion where you no doubt sat and put on your shoes before leaving the apartment. You had already put on a pair of house slippers and to his surprise, a new pair of house slippers were sitting on standby for him. He quickly removed his shoes, a pair of crocs, and slid on the slippers as he followed you from the entry.

The rest of your apartment was just as small. There was a large flatscreen on the wall that separated the living area from the entryway. Under it stood a brown media center with a gaming console and inside the glass doors was a wide array of video games and DVDs. 

Your couch, a sectional, took up the back wall, squeezing into the corner and ending before the door to your balcony and was littered with pillows with a plush cream colored blanket, folded in half and draped over the arm. 

In front of the couch between it and the media console, was a coffee table with a few plants. Behind the couch was a window with a wide window sill which was full of potted house plants of different varieties and colors. The more he looked around, the more plants he saw. He was glad he had gotten it right and gifted you a plant.

Next to the living area was a small dining area with a four person bistro table pushed against the wall on the opposite side of the door to the balcony. Three of the four chairs were placed around the table and on top was a vase with a few flowers in it. Behind the table, another window with deep set sills littered with more plants. Next to the dining area was your bedroom area. It was separated by a curtain, hung from a track on the ceiling. The curtain was a sheer white one, allowing Changbin a glimpse past it to your bed. It was a queen size with a black fluffy comforter and matching black decorative pillows. The sheets were hidden but the pillows behind the throw ones were a cream color with a light floral pattern.

On one side of your bed was a nightstand with a lamp and alarm clock while on the opposite side was a tall chest of drawers, atop where a few makeup items and perfume bottles stood. He turned away before he could get a good look at it all and faced you. “Oh, is that for tonight?” you asked, nodding towards the bottle in his hands. He nodded, crossing the short distance.

“Yeah, I uh… wasn’t sure what to bring,” he admitted, holding the bottle out for you to take. You smiled, taking the bottle and moved behind the kitchen island, opening the fridge and setting the bottle inside on the door. Changbin looked around once more as you shut the fridge and turned to face him.

“So, shall we get started?” you asked. Changbin walked over to the island, looking at the items on the counter. You had the beef ribs sitting on a plate. Everything else had been measured out and was ready to go. He could see you also had soybean sprouts, spinach, zucchini, daikon, and tofu. “What is all of this for?” he asked, nodding at the other items.

“I thought we could also make some of the side dishes?” you asked, looking up at him. Changbin smiled, pushing the cuffs of his sleeves up as he moved around to join you at the sink and wash his hands. “So I’m guessing you have the stuff for seasoned soybeans, seasoned spinach, hobak bokkeum, daikon radish salad, and pan fried tofu?” he asked as you dried your hands.

You nodded before handing him the towel. “I’ve made them before, so I could prepare those while you prepare the ribs?” you offered. Changbin smiled, shaking his head. “We can make them together while the meat cooks,” he explained. “How about you cut the garlic and onions and make the marinade?” he asked. “That way you can watch how to prepare the meat.” You nodded with a smile. 

“Sounds good to me.”

You quickly cut the garlic and onions, adding them to a bowl while Changbin prepared the ribs. You continued making the sauce while he explained how to mince the meat and showed you. “And you leave it on the bone?” you asked. He nodded as he set one rib aside and worked on another one. You added the rest of the ingredients to the bowl and stirred it, mixing it well.

“How’s this?” you asked, showing Changbin the sauce. He peered into the bowl. “How does it taste?” he asked. You looked up at him and back down. “You can dip your finger in here,” he said with a chuckle. You did as he said and tasted the sauce. “It’s really good,” you answered, moving to rinse your hand again. Changbin finished the second rib and moved onto the last one, slicing the meat down to the bone. “If you want to start putting the sauce on the ribs,” he said as he continued cutting.

“Make sure to get it down into the meat,” he added as you moved to his other side and started scooping out the marinade, placing generous amounts onto the ribs while he finished cutting the last one. He rinsed the knife and your cutting board before washing his hands and drying them.

He leaned over, inspecting your work. “Don’t use all of it,” he said as you focused on the last one. You looked up at him inquisitively as he took the bowl from you with a laugh. “You have to save some for later.” You nodded and moved to wash your hands while he set the remainder of the sauce aside. “Is the oven preheated?” he asked.

You glanced behind you and noticed the little light, communicating this to him. “Perfect,” he said, picking up the cast iron pan. You hurried to open the oven for him and he set the pan in the middle of the rack and stood up, shutting the door and turning to you. “Now we can work on those side dishes,” he said with a smile.

You focused on the cooking while Changbin did all the cutting and seasoning. Your rice cooker had finished when you plated the pan fried tofu. “Do you want something to drink?” you asked Changbin. He looked up from the spinach dish. “Uh, sure,” he said as he mixed the spinach with sesame oil and garlic. 

You turned to open the fridge, eyes falling on the bottle of wine. “Want to open this wine?” you asked, turning back to look at him. He looked up from the dish, eyes wide. “Oh, yeah, sure,” he answered, returning his focus to the spinach.

He felt his heart rate speed up. He was already tempting fate by being alone with you like this but adding alcohol to the mix? That could only end in disaster. He knew from experience that mixing alcohol with his heat and someone as pretty as you were? It was surely to end only one way but he was determined to not let it go that way.

You opened the bottle of wine and poured two glasses, putting the bottle back and gently pushing one of the glasses towards Changbin who thanked you and lifted the glass to his face, sniffing the liquid as you took a sip. Changbin followed, taking a sip before he immediately spit it back into the glass, as did you, exclaiming with disgust. You met his gaze and the two of you burst into laughter.

You retrieved the bottle from the fridge to inspect it while Changbin walked over to grab your glass, dumping both into the sink. “God, that’s awful,” you gagged. Changbin rinsed out the wine glasses, setting them aside. “Do you have anything else?” he asked.

You looked up from the bottle, setting it aside. “I might have some soju,” you said softly, turning to the fridge and opening it while Changbin watched, eyes roaming over your body and taking in your outfit. It was a simple cream dress with a pleated skirt that fell to the middle of your thighs. Over it, you wore an off the shoulder light pink sweater, showing the thick straps of the dress. He saw the white thigh high stockings you work and it took everything in him to not jump you right there.

“I do have soju,” you announced. “Soju sounds nice,” Changbin answered, drawing his eyes away from your backside. “Could you grab a couple shot glasses from the cabinet?” you asked, gesturing to the correct door as you grabbed an unopened bottle of Soju from the fridge. Changbin set the glasses down and grabbed the bottle from you.

“Want to see a neat trick?” he asked. You nodded, leaning against the counter and watching him attentively as he grasped the bottle firmly. “This is just something we do in Korea,” he said. “It doesn’t really serve a purpose other than to look cool.” You nodded and watched as he quickly turned the bottle so the cap was pointed to the 4 o’clock position before flicking it back upright quickly.

Inside the bottle, the liquid swirled around, creating a small cyclone. Your smile widened and you shifted on your toes. “Can I try?” you asked excitedly. Changbin handed the bottle over, showing you how to hold it before letting you attempt. The first try did nothing except make some bubbles.

“Here,” he said, moving to stand behind you, reaching around to place his hand over yours. “Like this,” he said softly, guiding your hand to the correct positions slowly. “Just like that, only faster. Try it.” You followed his instructions and managed to make a weak tornado appear in the bottle.

“I did it!” you said excitedly as he chuckled, taking the bottle from you. He twisted the cap off, leaving the small strip of metal attached. He poured your shot first before pouring one for himself. “The first one, we always cheer,” he explained as you both picked up your glasses. “How do you say cheers in Korean?” you asked. “Gonbae,” he replied, holding his shot glass up slightly.

You raised yours to meet his, giving it a small tap, the clinking of glass soft. “Gonbae,” you repeated before raising the liquor to your lips and tipping your head back, pouring the entire shot into your mouth and swallowing as Changbin mirrored your movements.

It was slightly sweet, very crisp, and clean as it went down smoothly. You set the shot glass down as Changbin finished his shot a step behind you, setting his glass down as well. You looked up to meet his gaze but before you could say anything, a timer went off, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“The short ribs!” you exclaimed, grabbing a pair of potholders while Changbin moved to take over the frying of the zucchini. You pulled the pan out and set it down. “Let’s transfer them over to this,” Changbin said, grabbing the cast iron sizzler pan, turning on the burner next to the other skillet. It heated up quickly and you helped Changbin move the ribs over to the sizzling pan, placing them face down on the iron and spooning the rest of the sauce over them.

“We’ll let those cook for a bit and then turn them over and let them finish cooking,” he said as he set the spoon aside. “This is done, by the way,” he said, moving the zucchini off the burner and turning it off. “Now, we just wait on the galbi,” he added.

You poured another shot for him before pouring one for yourself and quickly downed it. His close proximity earlier had made goosebumps rise on your arms and thighs and there was now a burning ache in your skin where he’d touched you as we all other places he had not touched.

The meat was done after a few more minutes and Changbin insisted you set the coffee table, opting to eat in the living room instead of the dining table as it was a much less formal setting. You moved the side dishes and bottle of soju over to the coffee table, also getting two bottles of water from the fridge as Changbin placed the sizzler pan on the wooden block that came with it.

Once you’d set the table, he walked over, setting the galbi in the middle while you moved a cushion to the floor for him to sit on. You admired your handiwork, looking at all the side dishes and the main dish. You had scooped two bowls of rice from your rice cooker and also heated up some leftover beef broth  and added green onions for garnish.

You sat down, Changbin across from you. “We make a pretty good team, don’t we?” you asked, looking up to meet his gaze. “Yeah,” he said with a smile. “We really do.”

You made space for Changbin to sit next to you, opting to put on a movie while you ate, drank, and chatted. He showed you how to make ssambap, adding the meat, rice, and sauce to a lettuce leaf and eating the entire thing. It was all so delicious and you mentioned in passing that you should have him over more.

One bottle of soju dwindled and you grabbed a second which also slowly emptied as you ate your fill of the food. Most of the plates were empty when you poured another shot for Changbin before pouring one for yourself. You raised your glasses and downed the shots quickly.

“So,” you said as you set your glass down and looked up at Changbin. “Can I ask you something?” you asked, scooting a little closer to him, enjoying the warmth that radiated from his body. He nodded, resting his elbow on the table and resting his chin in his palm as he looked at you with sparkling eyes.

“Why are you single?”

The question took him by surprise. He hadn’t expected you to ask that, let alone ask it so boldly. You had an innocent look on your face as you looked at him, expecting an answer. He mulled over his thoughts before choosing his words, carefully.

“I have a… complicated life,” he started. “There are things I have to… hide from people. Not because I’m afraid of how they’ll see me but because I’m afraid of scaring them off.” Your smile fell and you leaned closer, placing a hand on his forearm. “You’re a good person, Changbin,” you said softly in a reassuring tone. “There’s someone out there for you.”

He smiled at you, a small but genuine smile. “What about you?” he asked softly, looking at your hand on his arm, his heart rate speeding up as he looked up, meeting your gaze. “Me?” you asked. “I guess I haven’t found the right person. I’ve been burned too many times.”

Changbin felt his heart sink. The thought of you getting your heart broken made him both sad and angry. 

He didn’t know you that well but from what he’d experienced since moving in, he couldn’t imagine anyone purposely hurting you.

Changbin scooted closer, placing a hand over yours. The moment his skin touched yours it was like you’d been hit with an electric shock. You looked up to meet his eyes. There was a moment of unspoken tension between you as you stared at one another before something happened.

You weren’t sure who moved first but all you knew was that one minute you were sitting on the floor, using your coffee table as a table to eat at, the next you were straddling him, your lips on his and hands tangled in his hair as his hands slid up your back.

You moaned into his mouth, hands tugging at his hair as he grabbed your waist. “Wait,” he said breathlessly, pulling away to look up at you, his lips shining with your spit. “Maybe we shouldn’t. We’ve both been drinking. Maybe we should — mmpf!” 

You cut him off, taking his lips in another searing kiss, your lips parting his and your tongue sliding against his. His fingers dug into your hips, squeezing the plush flesh there as your lips started to plant wet kisses down the side of his neck over his pulse point. He let out a soft groan, letting his head fall back against the couch cushions as you kissed down to the junction where his neck and shoulder met.

You pulled the fabric aside, nipping and sucking on the skin as his hands guided your hips over his growing erection. “Fuck,” he gasped as you grinded against him. “Keep doing that, baby.” Your fingers inched up the back of his neck, curling into his hair before tugging his head to the side, trailing kisses and your tongue up the side of his neck.

“Is it bad that I kinda wanna sit on your face?” you whispered in his ear, making him groan. “God, please,” he groaned. “I’ll lay down right here if you’ll sit on my face,” he promised. You giggled as he pulled you in for a sloppy kiss. You pulled back, gently wiping his bottom lip with your thumb. “I’m serious,” he murmured against your skin.

“Take your panties off and sit on my face.”

You shook your head. “You take my panties off and then I’ll think about sitting on your face.”

Changbin growled, pushing your coffee table back with his foot, wrapping his arms around your body as he got to his feet in an impressive display of strength, before carrying you over to the bed and dumping you unceremoniously on the bed. He climbed on after you, crawling over you.

“Before we go any further,” he said softly. “Are you sure about this?” You nodded quickly. “Yes,” you said, grabbing one of his hands and guiding it under your skirt to press his fingers against your soaked panties. “I want this, Changbin. I want you.”

He groaned, pressing his fingers harder against you as he captured your lips in another heated kiss, tongue hastily entering your mouth as his hand slipped under your panties, finding your soaked center quickly and dragging his finger against your clit. “Ch-Changbin!” you gasped against his lips as his fingers sank into your heat, groaning as he started to move, curling and pumping in and out of your cunt.

“Fuck, you’re gonna be so tight around me,” he growled. Your thighs spread on instinct as he fucked your hole with his fingers quickly, attempting to coax an orgasm out of you. “B-Bin,” you whimpered, grabbing his wrist as he moved faster. Your hands trembled as you held onto him, eyes dipping down to watch as his forearm flexed.

Seeing his muscles flex with the simplest of motions made a fresh wave of arousal course through you, your walls clenching around his fingers. Changbin could tell you were close but he really wanted to take up your offer to sit on his face. Reluctantly, he pulled his fingers from your pussy, ignoring the whine of protests as he kissed the pout off your face.

“I told you I was serious,” he said as he grabbed your panties, pulling them off and discarding them.

“I want you to sit on my face,” he added as he laid back on the bed, taking your hands and guided you over him. “Bend over slightly,” he said, pushing to over as he guided your hips into place over his mouth. “You don’t have to do anything,” he added as he licked his lips.

“Just let me have a taste.

You were about to speak but your words were cut short by the gasp that ripped from your throat as his tongue made contact with your clit. Your hands landed on his stomach to steady yourself as he licked slowly and deliberately, flattening his tongue against your clit.

“Oh god,” you groaned, fingers grabbing the material of his sweater. Your eyes fluttered open as you glanced down at his crotch, noticing the outline of his hard cock. You got an idea as he continued to makeout with your pussy. You moved your hand down, sliding it over his cock, making him groan against you. His arms flexed against your thighs as he wrapped them tighter around, hands spreading your folds as he renewed his attention on your entrance, tongue swirling around it before dipping in.

You started to palm him through his pants, pressing your hand flat against him and massaging slowly. He was only semi-hard and as you continued to massage and stroke him over the material of his pants, he started to grow harder and harder under your touch.

You moaned as he latched onto your clit and sucked, making lewd wet slurping noises as he hungrily ate you out. It didn’t deter you from your goal as your fingers worked to undo the ties of his sweatpants. Once you’d gotten them loose, you slid your hand under the waistband, slipping your hand into his boxers and grabbing his hard cock.

He let out a strained noise, moaning against your cunt as your hand started to work his cock inside his pants. His one movement started to move faster as you stroked him, as if to match your movements. “Oh shit,” you gasped as he gently nipped at your clit, the graze of his teeth making your hips buck against his face. You needed to get him to the edge before you came.

You pushed his pants and underwear down, freeing his cock as he latched onto your clit again. His cock was thick, veins running up and down the shaft. The head was dark, a bead of precum already leaking from the slit at the top. 

You wrapped your fingers around the base, ignoring the hiss and hot breath against your pussy as you started to slide your hand up and down, using your palm to spread some of the precum. It wasn’t enough and so you pulled back, spitting into your hand before resuming, your saliva creating a lubricant to move faster and faster.

Changbin let out another strained groan, head falling back against the bed as your hand continued to jerk his cock. Just as you thought you were gaining the upper hand, Changbin snapped out of it, pulling your pussy down onto his waiting mouth, tongue sliding over your clit, flicking it with the tip of his tongue. His focus made yours waver as your hand faltered, sliding to the base of his cock.

“O-oh, god,” you moaned, head falling onto his stomach as he continued to lick, suck, and nip at your clit. Your hips started to move of their own accord, grinding against him as you tried to resume stroking his cock. Lifting your head, you did the only thing you could think of and gave the tip of his cock, particularly the slit, a lick before taking the head into your mouth.

Changbin groaned against you, giving your hip a sharp smack and you cried out, his cock falling from your mouth. Your lapse allowed him to regain control, tonguing your hole until he gave one final suck on your clit and you finally came with a moan of his name.

As your thighs shook from the aftermath of your orgasm, he lapped at your pussy, drinking up every bit of your release before you started to shy away from the contact. He helped you off him, chuckling as you rolled onto your back. Changbin grabbed his pants and underwear, pulling them up as he wiped his face with his shirt.

“I should have made you face the other way,” he said as he helped you out of your top, tossing it aside and pressing a kiss to your collar. His lips trailed down to your breast, running his tongue over your nipple and gently blowing on the wet skin as he kneaded your other breast with his hand.

He sat up, moving to kneel between your thighs, his hands moving up your thighs to your waist, eyeing your wet pussy. “Now that I’ve had a taste,” he said softly. “I want more.” You giggled as he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours in short, quick kisses. “C’mere,” he murmured, cupping the back of your head as he parted your lips with his, allowing his tongue to slide into your mouth, the taste of your cum on his tongue.

“Changbin,” you sighed, head falling back against the pillows as he kissed down your exposed chest, stopping to tease your nipples with his tongue once more before he sat up, gaze meeting yours, a lazy smirk on his face as he took in your disheveled appearance. A surge of pride swelled in his chest at the sight of you, knowing he was the one responsible.

“Binnie,” you cooed, reaching out for him. He took your hand, bringing your palm to his face and kissing it. “What is it, bunny?” he asked softly, lacing his fingers with yours. Your heart skipped a beat at the intimate gesture, wondering if this meant more to him than you initially thought.

“Are you sure about this?” you asked as he pulled your skirt down past your knees, tossing it aside before pulling his sweatshirt over his head. “Yes,” he answered, discarding the top on the floor with the rest of your clothes. He leaned over pressing light kisses up your body, ghosting over your chest briefly before he met your lips. You giggled as his hands slid up your sides, tickling you.

“I’ve never been more sure than I am now,” he added, mumbling against your lips. “I’ve wanted you for longer than I’d like to admit,” he continued, hands pushing his waistband down with one hand. “Where did you say you keep the condoms?” he asked, pulling back to meet your gaze.

“Back of the top drawer,” you said, pointing at your bedside table. Changbin scrambled over to the side of the bed, pulling open the drawer and finding the box. He grabbed one, putting the corner of the packet between his teeth as he quickly stripped himself of his pants and underwear before joining you on the bed once more. He tore open the foil packet with his teeth, removed the condom, and rolled it down his length slowly, avoiding your gaze.

Finally he tossed the remnants of the condom wrapper aside, promising he would clean them up later as he shifted into place, grabbing you by the thighs and tugging you closer in one motion, demonstrating his strength. “I promised I’ll be gentle,” he said softly. “But if I start to get out of control, just tell me, alright?” he asked softly, stroking the skin of your thighs. You nodded, licking your lips.

“I will,” you said softly. “But I should tell you something,” you added, watching as he tilted his head curiously. “What’s that?” he asked. “I like it a little rough.” Changbin let out a groan, fingers digging into your thighs. “You shouldn’t say things like that,” he said, taking his cock in one hand, guiding the head to your slit. “Makes me want to ruin you.”

You let out a moan as you felt the head of his cock push into you, thighs instinctively squeezing his hips. “You’re tense,” he noted as he felt your walls grip him tightly. “Relax for me,” he added in a soothing tone. “I don’t wanna hurt you.” You took a couple deep breaths, forcing your body to relax, your grip on his cock lessening. “That’s it,” Changbin whispered. “Good girl.”

He pushed in further and it took all of your concentration to relax and not start tensing up again. “Fuck,” he groaned as he slid in without resistance. “Such a good little bunny,” he murmured. The pet name made you moan, clenching around him involuntarily. “Don’t do that,” he grunted, hips meeting the back of your thighs as he bottomed out. “I’m trying not to cum and if you keep doing that,” he said as your walls tightened around him again. “I won’t last.”

“S-sorry,” you stammered, waiting for your bodies to adjust to one another. Changbin let go of your thighs, instead, his hands moving to your hips. “God, you’re so beautiful,” he said softly, admiring every inch of skin he could touch. “I could stay like this forever,” he added. “Spend all night fucking you.”

“You’re so fucking beautiful. All your curves, all of this,” he said, running his hands up to your chest, giving you a soft squeeze before moving back down to your hips. “I love every single bit of it.” Your cheeks burned. “Even if I’m not the —” his hand moved to your face, pressing a finger against your lips. “I don’t want to hear it,” he said. “Your body is beautiful. All of it. You are beautiful.”

You nodded, letting his words sink in.

He gave you a thrust, testing the waters and when you moaned instead of wincing, he set a steady pace, hands moving up to your waist as your own hands gripped the sheets. “Oh s-shit,” you gasped, pleasure building in the pit of your stomach, a heat settling in your belly as the pace slowly increased. Changbin slowed down, letting out a chuckle when you pouted.

“I told you,” he said softly. “I’m not trying to cum immediately.”

His pace continued at a slow pace but each thrust was hard and powerful, making you see stars. “Ch-Changbin,” you whined. “Yeah, baby?” he asked breathlessly as he continued, his hips not faltering once. “M-more,” you whimpered. “More? You want more?” he asked. “More of what? Gotta be specific, sweetheart.”

Your cheeks burned under his gaze as he waited for a response. “F-faster,” you finally managed to squeak out. Changbin chuckled but obliged, giving in to your request easily. The room filled with the sound of skin against skin but not loud enough to drown out your moans. As he reached a fast but comfortable pace, you let out a loud moan, shocking yourself. You quickly raised your hand to cover your mouth but Changbin grabbed your wrist, pinning your hand against the bed.

“Don’t cover your mouth,” he said, shaking his head as he leaned over you, pounding into you, the sound of the bed hitting the wall made your cheeks burn even more. “I want everyone to know how good I make you feel.”

You moaned loudly, unrestrained. “P-pin me down,” you said suddenly, making him hesitate for a moment before he grabbed your other wrist and pinned it down, continuing to fuck you into the sheets. “You’re so strong,” you moaned, thighs squeezing his sides. Changbin let out a groan, cock twitching inside you. He pulled out quickly, making you whine in protest but he was quick to switch places, guiding you to sit on top of him.

“Ride me,” he said. You nodded, aligning his tip with your hole and sinking down on him, letting out a moan as his cock filled your cunt. “Fuck, that’s it, baby. Go on,” he said as you steadied yourself, placing your hands on the bed and raising your hips. Changbin’s hands ghosted over your hips, guiding your movements until you had set a pace.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty on top of me like this,” he groaned, bucking his hips to match your movements. “I like this. Can focus on touching you,” he continued, moving his hands up to cup your chest, kneading your breasts. “You can’t pin me like this, though,” you whined, making him chuckle. “You like that?” he asked breathlessly. “Like it when I hold you down?” You nodded. “I do. Makes me feel so weak.”

Changbin let out a groan, his hands moving, taking your hands. “I could hold your wrists,” he offered. “Or if you’re good and keep riding me like this, I promise I’ll pin you down and fuck you rough, like you want. Just keep going,” he said, placing your hands on his chest. “Keep going.”

You rolled your hips, chasing your high as he nodded and encouraged you. “That’s it, bunny, cum for me and then I’ll pin you down and fuck you just how you want it.” Your eyes fluttered shut as your thighs started to shake. “I-I’m close!” you gasped. “It’s okay. Go ahead and let go, baby.” You let out a moan as your orgasm washed over you. You hadn’t even fully finished when Changbin had flipped you over, pinning your wrists above your head as he took over.

He fucked you through your high, chasing his own as he pounded into you. “Fuck,” he cursed. “So fucking good,” he continued. “Gonna cum again?” he asked, feeling your cunt convulsing around him. “Y-yes!” you cried out, your voice bouncing off the walls of your apartment. “Be good and cum for me,” he grunted. 

You grabbed his hand, guiding it to your throat and he understood without you saying a word. He squeezed gently and a moment later, you came undone once more but this time, Changbin went over the edge with you, releasing into the condom with a moan as his hips continued to thrust weakly until he finally came to a stop, panting as you both let your orgasms sweep over you.

The hand around your throat moved, cupping the back of your neck instead as Changbin pressed a kiss to your forehead. He released your wrists and pulled out of you carefully. Your eyes fluttered shut as he moved about, discarding the condom. He returned to the bed a moment later, helping you into a pair of underwear and an oversized shirt. “We should shower,” you whined as he joined you on the bed.

“Hmm, later,” he replied, wrapping an arm around your midsection and pulling you into him. “It’s late, let’s just sleep,” he added and before you could agree or protest, slumber welcomed you.

The next morning you woke up first and carefully got up, heading to the bathroom to do your business. Afterwards, you returned to bed, settling under the covers with Changbin, accidentally waking him in the process. “Sorry,” you whispered as you snuggled up next to him. Changbin murmured under his breath and pulled you in closer, wrapping his arms around you. 

“I spent the night,” he finally said and you nodded. “Yes,” you answered, looking up at him. “You did.”

He looked down at you as a silence fell over you. “I guess we should probably discuss what this means…” he trailed off as you smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips. “It can mean whatever you want it to mean,” you replied. “If you aren’t looking for a relationship and only want a fuck buddy, I’m fine with that.” Changbin winced at the crude remark. “Or if you’d rather it be a one time thing, I’m okay with that, too.”

“I don’t,” Changbin said quickly. “I don’t want it to be a one time thing.” You smiled at him as he spoke. “But I’m not sure if I want a relationship either,” he continued. You pulled him into a kiss before rolling him onto his back as you straddled his hips. “Well, take your time,” you suggested. “Figure out what you want.” You leaned over to kiss him again, trailing your lips down his neck to his chest. 

“It’s not like I’m going anywhere any time soon.”

©️ kwanisms 2024 | all works on this blog are protected under copyright. Do not repost, continue, or translate my works. All graphics made by me.

[builtaworldwithyourlove]

Sweet

one shot

1.5k / joel miller x f!reader / minors dni

summary: summertime saturday bliss with joel. Inspired by ‘Sweet’ by Cigarettes After Sex

warnings: fluff, dad!joel, boyfriend!joel, no specific description of reader, no outbreak, age gap (reader is mid20s& joel is early to mid 40s), just a whole lotta loving. 

Main Masterlist 🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️

You were never fond of sharing a bed with anyone. As a child, you hated sleepovers and always wanted to be asleep early. As a teenager, you had a scrupulous night routine which carried on into your life now. Skincare, meditation, reading and sleep no later than 10pm. You were a light sleeper too, the slightest twitch, distant car alarm or whistle of wind would startle you.

That soon changed after you met Joel and you stayed the first night with him. He was double your size and he made sure to hold you all night. He was a deadweight and didn’t disturb you in the slightest. After the first night with him, the loss of his arms draped over you was huge and you could no longer sleep easily without him next to you.

Joel always slept in later than you, and would only wake after you did, to you either stifling a laugh to some stupid cat video, or vigorously writing down your manifestations and goals for the day. He didn’t mind. Your face first thing in the morning was a sight he’d want to cherish for the rest of his life.

‘Morning darl’ he drawled through a squint. 

‘Sleep well?’ You rolled over to face him, and he cupped your face and pulled you in for a kiss.

‘Better than ever,’ Joel rubbed his eyes and scooped your hair off over your should and behind your neck. ‘Coffee?’

🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️

You both moseyed downstairs and opened all the doors and windows, ready for the heat of an American summer to fill the home .

Joel made your coffee, exactly how you liked it, with frothed milk, plenty of syrup and in your favourite mug, engraved with your zodiac sign.

He held out his hand and you delicately took it and walked outside onto the patio. 

Wildflowers were scattered across the borders of the garden, splashes of colour and flickers of wildlife dashed throughout the morning dew.

A sparrow darted across the garden and landed the fence, calling out to the magnolia tree which shaded your patio. Joel laid propped up on his elbow as you both lounged on the deckchairs watching the birds and butterflies in the morning sun. 

He aimlessly ran his fingers up and down your leg, gazing at you sipping your coffee, and smirking with a full heart.

‘Enjoying the summer mornings baby?’ Joel drawled, as he stood up and stretched. His shirt lifted, revealing a strip of golden skin and chiselled stomach.

You tilted your head, squinting as the sun glowed into your eyes. ‘I wouldn’t wanna be anywhere else, sweet boy. The city life doesn’t even compare’

‘Well this is your home now darl’. Can’t let you go anywhere now’ Joel winked and took your empty coffee mug into the kitchen.

You followed him into the house, finding the motivation to get your life together and not strip the man down to his bare bones. 

He pointed a finger at you. ‘You, shower.’

You rolled your eyes.

‘Er, none of that little miss. I’m not having you moaning when it’s 11am and the parking lots are gridlocked and you can’t get your damn scented candles and bed linens.’

You were too stunned to speak, and cackled as he knew you too well. How could you be mad when he loved you too deeply to let you lose out?

🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️

You hopped in the shower, scrubbing yourself whilst filling the air with fragrance that came from Joel’s mahogany teakwood shower gel. Women’s toiletries smelt sweet, but didn’t last anywhere near as long as men’s. And anyway, who wouldn’t want to have Joel’s scent lingering all day.

Wrapped up in a fluffy white towel and your hair in a towel wrap, you did your makeup, brushed out your lashes and eyebrows, and drowned yourself in Lost Cherry. Your signature scent. 

You decided on a linen co ord, baby pink with shorts and a long sleeved shirt, which you had unbuttoned slightly lower than normal, but smart enough to leave enough to the imagination. 

You danced down the stairs, hearing Joel and Sarah playing in the garden. Breakfast had been made and you invited Sarah to join you on your Saturday shopping trip before Joel had to go to work 

‘Come on peanut, I’ll treat you to the soda shaped candle you wanted’ you called to Sarah and grabbed your purse and some snacks, of course. Sarah ran upstairs to find one of her favourite dresses and matching bows. You prayed she’d never grow up out of her tutu dress stage for any occasion.

Joel looked like a dream, in his cargos and tight fitting flannel. The sky could be on fire and this man would still be wearing a flannel insisting it’s never too hot. He smelt like coffee and cigarette ash, and cedarwood.

He grabbed your waist, threatening to tilt you backwards over the garden sprinkler. You yelped and whacked him off with your purse and whispered seductively ‘That’s just taken away your chance to see what’s underneath my outfit.’

He fell to his knees and lunged into you, your knees buckling as he stood up with you over his shoulders. He ran into the kitchen, still holding you as if he was a fireman and the garden was a burning flame. Sarah skipped down the stairs and immediately ran with concern hearing you yelping.

‘Ma’am, I’m gonna need you to clear the exits!’ Joel did his stupid talking down a walkie talkie impression and pointed to Sarah to give way to you both. 

She crossed her arms and stood firmly in the doorway, as if she wasn’t 4ft nothing.

‘You leave me with no choice’ Joel seemed to forget he still had you upside down over his shoulder and squatted down to put Sarah in the same position.

You clumsily bumped heads as Joel flung you both about with no care. He dropped you on the sofa and Sarah on the armchair.

You were out of breath from laughing and trying to keep some of your dignity.

Joel realised the time, he had to leave in two minutes to go to the site. 

‘Well girls, thanks for holding me up’ he jokingly muttered, trying to imitate the attitude you and Sarah sometimes give him.

Sarah looked at you and you both shook your head and giggled. Joel chucked you the car keys and you and Sarah went out to do some shopping. 

🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️🫧☁️

After facing the trenches of a retail park in scorching heat, you headed home. Joel had called to say he would be home before you and asked what cocktail you wanted lined up.

Sarah was asleep in her car seat, and you reversed onto the drive, texting Joel to grab Sarah while you got the bags.

Joel’s eye widened and jaw went slack as he saw you unload the car.

‘Baby, if I see another throw cushion I may have to scream.’ Joel delivered the most deadpan one liners sometimes, digging at your femininity and weakness for home furnishings. 

‘Don’t act like you don’t fall asleep on them every single night half way through the film you decided to pick’ you shut the car door and let Joel chuckle as he went and layed Sarah on the sofa.

‘What’s for dinner baby?’ Joel asked.

‘Not sure, ask Sarah when she wakes up what she wants, I got groceries yesterday so she can pick’ you kissed his cheek and reached up for the wine glasses.

You gestured at Joel if he wanted some, and he pulled the cork out of the half finished wine bottle from last night with his teeth. 

You began to crumble under how hot this man was, until he blew the cork out of his mouth and aimed it for your head. He laughed like a boy and smacked your ass as you rolled your eyes. 

‘You know Miller, for someone who likes sex so much, you’re doing an awful lot to sabotage your chances of getting some tonight’ you tapped him on the hip with your foot, and he grabbed your ankle trying to trip you up. 

‘You can’t resist this boyish charm, baby’ he winked and showed his perfect white teeth through a grin.

Sarah came tiptoeing into the kitchen and cuddled her daddy. You sat on the breakfast stool next to Joel, and she clambered onto your lap. You kissed her forehead and she wrapped her arms round her neck. 

‘Daddy, can we have Pizza and the special salad you make?’

‘Anything for my princesses’ Joel stood and wrapped his thick arms round you both, before getting dinner ready for you all.

Sarah picked up your phone and scrolled through your playlist, picking the song you were humming as you drove earlier.

‘It’s so sweet, knowing that you love me. Though we don’t need to say it to eachother, sweet’

‘I love you’ you mouthed to Joel. Your eyes welled up as the song played and filled your heart with an overwhelming feeling of how happy you were.

[violettwrites]

hi!! will you please write another fic about daryl x reader

reader seeing/experiencing something traumatic and she’s shaking and tears rolling down her cheeks and daryl sits down in front of her trying to comfort her.

safe in your skin 🏹 daryl dixon

a/n: hi nonnie than you so much for this request !! ( and sorry it took so long 😭 ) i listened to the song linked while writing this and highly recommend you guys do too !! it’s beautiful and tigers jaw is one of my fave bands 🫶🏻 anyway i hope you enjoy this !! and as always, don’t forget to like/reblog if you enjoyed this and feel free to follow me to see more of my stuff !! x

i also just realised gregory is the fkn asshole from hilltop but this is NOT him i just couldn’t think of names apparently i am so sorry

as always, my ask box is open !

( intended lowercase )

summary: reader and daryl go on a supply run, but are separated from someone close to them— when they do eventually find them, they must learn to deal with the unforgiving curse that is life.

warnings: mentions of death

word count: 848

the woods were eerily quiet, the usual rustle of leaves and the distant calls of wildlife had been replaced by a thick and heavy silence. you and daryl had been split from gregory during a supply run, someone you had been through the fall with since the start. your best friend in this unforgiving world. but you had known he was smart enough to survive on his own until the two of you found him. or so you thought.

the sun was starting to breach the horizon, the soft glow casting an almost angelic light over the town daryl had led you to in search for your best friend. if it was anyone else, he probably would have told them it wasn’t worth risking their lives to look for him, but you were different.

making your way towards the warehouse you all were supposed to go to so you could find supplies, you stopped once you reached the parking lot, spotting a group of walkers, all crouched down as they feasted on something— someone.

gregory.

you knew that brown coat he had worn since the start, now covered in blood and guts— the remains of what was once your best friend. the sight was too much, causing you to drop to your knees, mouth open to speak but nothing came out.

the brutal reality hit you like a tidal wave— all at once. sure, you had lost people before. people that were close to you, but there was something so much different about losing your best friend. your confidant. the one you told everything to. just taken away from you like that. he was gone. his last moments presented to you in a gruesome way— a way he never wanted to go out.

your hand shakily came to your mouth, tears clouding your vision as they freely streamed down your cheeks, choked sobs coming from your lips as you tried to process what happened, but you couldn’t. you couldn’t get your head around the fact he was truly gone. it was a sight that was haunting, knowing it would be imprinted in your mind for the rest of your life.

daryl, ever the stoic figure he was, had been beside you, at a loss for words. he watched as you struggled to keep yourself together, but the sight of you silently breaking down next to him made his heart wrench. you didn’t deserve to see your best friend’s end like that. no one did.

he took a deep breath, crouching down slowly in front of you, fearing that any sudden moment or words might shatter you further.

“hey,” he spoke softly, his rough voice carrying a tenderness that was rarely heard. he reached out, placing his hands on your shoulder in attempt to ground you— to bring you back to this reality, as much as you didn’t want to be here.

you looked up at him, eyes red and glassy, struggling to form words. daryl didn’t push; he simply stayed there, his present a silent testament to his support. he wasn’t asking you to speak or pretend you were okay, he was just there, a steady presence in the midst of your storm.

as the minutes ticked by, daryl slowly pulled you into a gentle embrace, arms tightly wrapped around you. you rested your head against his chest, body still trembling as you tried to come to terms with the loss you had just suffered suddenly. you tried to focus on the beat of his heart, steady as you listened, a small yet significant reassurance. he stroked your hair with one hand, the other still holding you close.

“i know,” he murmured into your hair, his voice rough yet filled with emotion. “it ain’t fair, it ain’t right.” he paused for a moment, swallowing hard as he tried to find the right words. “but we gotta keep goin’. for him. for everyone we lost. we gotta keep movin’.”

you nodded against him, the closeness offering a fragile sense of comfort. you knew daryl was right, the world didn’t stop for anyone. and the dead wouldn’t stop for anything. not even your tears and cries. but the ache in your chest was still painful. yet his presence was a lifeline, a reminder that even in the darkest moments, you weren’t alone.

eventually, you pulled back slightly, meeting his gaze. there was a shared understanding in his eyes, an unspoken bond formed through loss and survival. everyone had experienced the same thing. but that didn’t mean it hurt any less.

daryl offered a small, encouraging nod, and together, you stood up, ready to face the rest of your journey— knowing it would be filled with more moments like this. as much as you wish it wasn’t— that cruel things didn’t have to happen to such kind people.

the road ahead was uncertain and filled with the echoes of loss, but with daryl by your side, you took your first step forward, carrying the memory of gregory with you— not his gruesome death, but the light he brought to your life.

[alatusprinz]

our prelude and beyond .

pairing : tighnari x f!reader

genre : cotton candy fluff, slowburn, mutual pining.

trigger warning word count smh: 9.5k

summary : [ moments between you and your lover, based on tighnari's voice lines. from the moment when you first met to the future of your connection. ]

"to the silly encounter of fate that brought us together, forest watcher."

"to face perpetuity with you, young scholar" 

-

1 . " Hello . "

"archons above, what is up with this forest?" you couldn't believe you were lost inside an endless maze-like lush forest no longer than an hour after arriving at the gates of a new nation. so much for the sky-high expectations for a new experience. 

from left to right, up and down wherever you turned your sight, no sign leading to the place you were headed to was visible- not even a faint trace that looked anything similar to trails from people walking. you meddled with the wrinkled piece of note your mentor gave before you left at least ten times for the past hour. you scoffed at the tiny size and how it's almost ripped in half from how long it took for you to travel to this... still and unchanging forest seemingly in the middle of nowhere. besides, who writes "Gandharva Ville" on a piece of paper you could lose in less than a minute if you took your attention off it for one moment while traveling from one nation to another? clearly, your mentor didn't give a single crap regarding your journey to the actual research place you are supposed to stay at despite nagging your ear off about the etiquettes and reputation you were meant to uphold since you were “representing your entire nation”- her words, not yours. 

while you were staring at the paper in your hand like it was supposed to transform into a seelie and guide your pathway, you suddenly realized twilight would fall soon. you'd have no one around, no source of direction, no light and perhaps worse. when you heard sounds of unknown animals squeaking and creaking somewhere to your right, you were reminded that this was a foreign nation and even more unfamiliar forest. definitely worse out there.

you've been wandering around for hours now, it was a miracle how you haven't seen a single wandering soul around, not even enemies. it all felt eerily unfamiliar, lost somewhere in a foreign forest. and so with more anxiety flooding your thoughts than the proper, logical measures you’d need to find your way through, you walked around for what felt like another few hours.

amidst the endless wandering, you finally saw something that could be a place of significance, maybe a landmark- a sight of a giant tree towering over everything around it. 

in the light of the setting sun, the entire place looked marvelous, wildlife and plants prospering in harmony. when the sunray gently illuminated your skin, you finally had a moment for yourself to properly open your eyes and take in the beauty of your surroundings. dusk had painted the sky orange, scarlet and pink, even the clear air and gentle breeze looked like it was shimmering with the hues of sunset. a few verdant crystalflies fluttered around you, swiftly passing by and soaring to the skies- you had never seen such pretty green hued ones before. so this really was the land of dendro- you quietly pondered the obvious. lastly, traces and non-threatening (for now) sounds of wildlife brought quiet comfort to your anxious mind. hey, at least you weren’t wholly alone here. 

you returned your attention to the huge tree from a cliff above, wondering which route you should take to check out the surroundings. maybe it was the halo-effect of the prettiest sunset you had ever seen, but when you focused on the tree longer, you realized it looked faintly similar to a fairytale book you used to read when you were a child. 

"the tree of souls, a giant willow tree connected to all living beings around." you recited the familiar line under your breath, admiring how mighty the tree looked from above. was this the kind of giant willow tree the author was envisioning while writing the story? if so, you thought you could finally see the reason why everyone in the story seemed enchanted with its divinity and beauty. 

maybe a prayer could work, like it does in that little book you used to read? as silly as that sounded, you closed your eyes, brought your hands together and spoke out loud.

"dear mighty tree of souls, please aid me in finding the "Gandhara Ville" today safely. i'm not sure how many wishes you offer to faraway-land visitors, but for today, just me finding my way would more than suffice. thank you." a warm forest breeze swept past you, pleasantly caressing your skin as it whirled away.

"on a second thought, maybe add a loving boyfriend too while you're at it." you thought to yourself, slightly giggling at the additional childish wish. after all, you used to pray day and night for a lover you'd share your life with. not that Tsaritsa ever provided you with that, though. ironic and slightly unfair, seeing how your god was technically the archon of love. 

you were reminded of the need for you to move fast, so you intended on finding a way to at least make your way to the tree and climb up to see any sign of that mystery of a place you were to find. 

well, until a small piece of... something dropped right on top of your head painfully with a loud thud.

you immediately clutched your head and groaned from the contact- what the hell? you glared at the tree next to you, trying to see where it came from. since it fell right on top of your head, it was probably from the branch above- you came close to cursing out, but you held back and sighed. so much for your luck in praying to your childhood fairytale tree. 

"now what is this...?" what are the odds of a sturdy glass bottle labeled "dhayl oil" just dropping on your head out of nowhere? you picked it up and spun the small brown bottle around. nothing else was written on the sleek surface, the frosted glass body obscuring your vision to look clearly on what exactly was inside of it.

"what in the archons is dhayl, anyways?" you complained to yourself as you contemplated throwing the bottle down the cliff. 

"that would mean "tail", indicating that the bottle you're holding right now is the oil i use on my tail." right after you raised your arm to toss the bottle down the cliff, a voice suddenly broke the silence. your eyes widened at the voice and turned around at the unexpected presence of another... person. he was shadowed behind the tree a bit, it was hard to see just what his... species were. you were quick to realize that this person had to be a hybrid though, from his mention of a tail of his own. 

"plant-based oils are pretty complex to make, i'd appreciate it if you didn't throw my hard work off the cliff." when he approached you a bit, you finally confirmed your thought- this person in front of you was definitely a hybrid. you had never seen someone quite like him before, so you tried your best to examine his appearance as respectfully as possible without making it clear that you were gawking. 

two large ears stood tall on his head, and a bushy tail behind that he mentioned. you narrowed your eyes a bit and tried your best to silence your thoughts but- holy crap this man was pretty. were all hybrids this pretty? though you didn’t remember reading anything about the mere identity of a hybrid enhancing your physical features. 

"sorry, i didn't think it belonged to someone. it dropped onto my head above from the sky, i thought maybe it was a retribution from celestia." you managed to reply as normal while resisting the urge to roll your eyes. you remembered the thud sound it made when the hard glass bottle made contact with your skull. it still hurt, you managed to soothe the ache by rubbing it softly.

to your surprise, the man laughed lightheartedly at you. if he was keeping his distance from you first, maybe he had come to the conclusion that you weren't a threat. he came closer, standing right in front of you.

"you have a pretty big traveling bag. would you happen to be a part of the group of exchange scholars coming from different nations to sumeru?" ah, so he was aware of the program you came for. which means there was high possibly that-

"indeed, i am. are you a forest ranger, by any chance?" you finally felt relieved, running into someone local. maybe he knew the way to where you were supposed to have arrived approximately 5 hours ago.

"technically yes, a forest watcher to be precise." you narrowed your eyes in confusion, you admit you weren't an expert in sumeru's scholar titles and those who work for the Akademiya yet.

"it doesn't matter, i am a part of the crew, yes. you are correct on that." sensing your confusion, the man replied shortly. glancing at you up and down, he took out a small piece of note from his pouch.

"let's see, we have scholars to go to the Akademiya in branches researching the Akasha, the canned knowledge, historical runes and records, elemental incantation based charms, and elemental energy. which one of those are you assigned in? i'll find the location and find a forest ranger to accompany you safely there." the man checked his list again, then looked at you, expecting an answer.

"but i'm not here for the Akademiya." an awkward silence was shared for a few seconds before his ears perked up in realization. 

"ah, so you're that one... peculiar person who majors in a different field, yet applied to train for botany." during your conversation, you barely managed to divert your attention away from his fluffy ears, unsure if it would be offensive to stare. you wanted to touch them so bad for some reason. you’d blame it on the fact that you had never seen a hybrid before but you had a feeling that wasn’t the only reason, it was just to reassure yourself that you weren’t the odd one here.

"you don't get scholars to botany often?" you held up the conversation despite your mind being flooded with his ears. were these fox ears? you wanted to ask. it had to be, it didn't look like cat or dog's. then again, you really weren’t familiar with manners regarding hybrids- the last thing you wanted to do was somehow offend your only chances of finding your way. 

"botany, it does get an impressive number of students. it's just that most scholars choose Akademiya, not our base inside a foreign forest. they usually choose the safer option, unlike someone. highly peculiar indeed." you weren't clear if he was subtly making fun of your choice distinct from your major field, but his latter statement caught your attention.

"our base?" you tilted your head.

"you're headed to Gandharva Ville to experience first-hand botany and the forest ecosystem, correct? that is where we forest rangers live and work." your eyes lit up, finally with the realization that your small wish to that giant tree did come true after all. not to mention, with the help of this ... small bottle in your hand.

amidst your conversation, a memory of your mentor shouting at you about formalities of self introduction and its importance shot through your mind. wait, come to think of it-

"oh, now that i’m reminded... okay. hi, i'm (name), as you know i came here to study botany in relation to my field. i'm sorry for the late introduction." you finished your self introduction awkwardly . you thought of shaking his hand, but refrained once again due to not knowing the etiquette in a new nation and settling for a slight bow-down. perhaps they didn't shake hands here upon first encounter, judging from the way he isn't exactly offering you his hand either. he giggled a bit though, while you were unsure why.

"from the top, i see. hi there. i'm Tighnari, Forest Watcher of the Avidya Forest. my duty is to preserve both the rainforest's ecosystem and the safety of its visitors... that would include you as well, newbie scholar." he tilted his head a bit, looking at you straight in the eye with an amused glint in his amber eyes. wait- were they amber? you could’ve sworn you saw hints of green too. 

"could i please ask you to escort me to your base? i've been lost for a while now, as you see..." you reached out to him to hand him the bottle of his "tail oil", whatever the purpose of that was. the forest watcher gratefully accepted his oil back and slipped it in his pocket securely with murmurs of thanks. his somewhat amused look never left his face, even though it was faint.

"that would technically be my duty, newbie scholar. can i help you with your bags?"

-

2. Mistakes and… Leafmark?

time passed by quickly ever since you came to the forest rangers' basement. every day you would get up, spend time revising and learning about the ecosystem in Avidya forest, sometimes go experience it first hand with the forest rangers in training, then report to Tighnari by briefing on what you learnt that day. it was somehow rigid of a routine but it never got too dull. forest life surprisingly fit well in your living preferences despite the slight hesitation you had before coming here. 

tighnari surprised you in a way. you expected him to be a bit... different than he turned out to be. for starters, he didn't demand for you to submit a paper like your mentor did back home. it was trickier, he claimed that it was easier, and just that you had to simply visit him and prove to him through "civil, organized discussion" sessions that you've spent the day productively and learnt under his watch. unfortunately, tighnari himself is like a walking encyclopedia of every single plant, animals and who knows what more- known to teyvat. you were sure he didn't mean to be that condescending, but holy hell, was it intimidating at times when you failed to answer his questions. perhaps he was never aware, but he asked ridiculously precise questions often and would spend a long time bombarding you with information on the subject at hand. it was interesting, you admit but it turns out he was much, much more brilliant than you in somehow magically absorbing every ounce of facts he happens to encounter. 

of course, you never exactly outright avoided his discussion sessions. but you had to admit that after a month and half being here, some of what you learnt would get mixed or carried on misunderstood until the forest watcher corrects you or somehow tricks you into answering incorrectly or doubting your answer until you're sure enough to not fall for his word-mazes. the worst part was when tighnari suddenly brings up a random mushroom you discussed 2 weeks ago for approximately a minute, then asks what environment it grows well in, what herbs it's best mixed with, and your own personal insight on how you intended to use it in connection to your field if he’s feeling particularly tricky that day. 

it distressed you to no ends when you couldn't remember it as well as expected even if he has never, not even once discouraged or expressed disappointment in you. if anything, tighnari was an extraordinary mentor, always ready for questions, discussions and hands-on examination if you appeared interested enough. when you failed to answer correctly, he’d always nod with a soft hum, and explain from the top to ensure your correct perception on the topic. tighnari also always reassured you when you looked disappointed when you weren’t sure of the answer, claiming that mistakes are the key to success and that you should never be distressed or scared of him of answering incorrectly. 

though you adore him, it still stresses you out when you fail to answer his questions to your capacity. you reminded yourself again, tighnari isn't doing this to spite you- he merely wants to make sure you spent a worthwhile period of learning under him. he has enough work on his hands to begin with, why would he bother to tease you? he awoke well hours before you do, then always remains in his office after you two's little sessions, goes through tons of paperwork, research and whatever else his duty calls for until ungodly hours. come to think of it, you've never seen him sleep before- one time you caught him still doing paperwork at 4am and when you asked if he wasn’t tired, he merely responded with a “fennec foxes tend to focus better during night hours”. in other words, he didn’t exactly deny being exhausted. 

you were really concerned about him overworking himself, but you were frankly unsure if you were someone who could ask such things. sure, you two spent time together alone often, but most times, it was for academic purposes or obligatory meetings. (there were sometimes moments that existed outside of "most times", though.) so, there just wasn't any convincing reason as to why someone who barely has time to sleep would dedicate time for you. 

except, maybe you were wrong- you thought today.

"less with the reciting, (name). dictionary definition-style precise answers are your expertise, i know by now. give me an example on what difference it makes if you squeeze the juice out of Rukkhashava Mushrooms in comparison to pressing it into powder for making first degree burn ointment." your eyes nearly fell out of your socket when you heard the mention of that specific type of mushroom- Rukkhashava? not because you barely remembered any academically beneficial facts about it, but because of a faint memory of you reading it was viewed as an important symbol connected to the Dendro Archon that struck your mind. you opened your mouth to declare that people couldn't possibly make ointments with those almost-celestial mushrooms, but then you hesitated.

your memory wasn't clear enough. what if you answered and if you were wrong? tighnari worded the question clearly, specifying the procedure and even mentioning what purpose ointment it was used for. perhaps you were wrong? why would he ask acutely like that if it wasn't even truly used in the medical field?

before you could mumble that you didn't know, the forest watcher sighed and lightly poked your forehead gently with a book. then poked you again. and again.

"what-" as soon as you opened your mouth to complain, he answered it before it even left your mouth.`

"you're going to end up with wrinkles, you know? i asked you a question about botany, not philosophy. no need to look so distraught as though finding path through afterlife." tighnari really tried to help you be comfortable with him and not view him as an absolute superior, but you often had trouble doing it his way. it wasn't how you learnt it back at home, after all. old habits die hard.

just like that, you were unknowingly furrowing your brows again. your forehead was met with the book again, tighnari gently pushing it as if to straighten your eyebrows and possibly prevent you from getting wrinkles or something of the sort.

"see, that's the face. i keep on telling you over and over to just relax in front of me. tell me what you were thinking of, i know you had something in mind just now." you're on the right track most of the times, anyways. he wanted to say, but held his tongue.

"i... seem to remember that those mushrooms you mentioned weren't exactly the normal species." you analyzed his face to see if there were any hints of positive or negative reaction. maybe he'd look pleased if you were right. except, his face remained completely blank as always, only gesturing you to continue. he was exceptional at keeping his poker face during these discussions, you had to give him that. 

“go on.”

"...you know, with relation to the Dendro Archon and all? i seem to remember that it was a holy crystallization of the dendro god's legacy." you finally finished, slightly worried if your answer was correct. you distinctly remembered something along the lines, you were sure of it. and yet you couldn’t seem to be able to conceal the slight hesitation especially when you couldn’t grasp if you were right or not. 

to your relief, tighnari retracted the book from your face softly, then smiled slightly.

"good job. i could tell you knew." your eyes widened in pleasant surprise, struggling not to beam at him in happiness.

"that's probably the biggest problem i want to help you fix, (name). you're never fully sure of yourself unless you are able to carbon-copy book definitions on a piece of paper. you have exquisite memory, excellent interpretation skills and everything a scholar needs to continue their path, but you lack confidence in your own self." tighnari crossed his arms, still maintaining unwavering eye contact with you. he was being serious about this, and you couldn't deny his words either.

"i- sorry, it's just... a habit. i'll try to avoid it from now on." you awkwardly meddled with your fingers from the sudden memory of tighnari complimenting your learning skills and wit just a minute ago. his praise wasn't something you heard often, it made you feel... content. happy, if you may.

"don't be afraid to make mistakes. it's all part of the learning process. i'll be by your side to help you out if you need." if you were feeling happy before, you'd say you were over the moon now.

"from now on, i want to give you a small assignment." your eyes snapped open and stared at your mentor. already? you had just finished an encouragement talk just now and he's already thinking of your next move. except, what he suggested was very different from what you expected.

"avoid using ambiguous words like "i seem to remember", "i think", and "i guess, i believe" when talking from now on. in front of me, for starters. that's your first assignment from me personally."

"that's... a rather curious assignment, mentor."

"pay no attention to the academic aspect. even in your daily life, you're to practice it until you're comfortable expressing your ideas without outright bringing voice of doubt to yourself." at the mention of this not being a purely academic program, your confusion doubled. tighnari crossed his arms and spoke again.

"i'll explain to you later if you want to know why it's important. but for now, let it remain a mundane assignment you just have to complete. is that clear?" you nodded as confidently as you could muster. at least that was a start.

"alright, you're dismissed for today. but before you leave," he paused for a while, then skimmed through his book as if searching for something.

"ah, here it is." he mumbled and brought the book towards you.

"i remembered that you were talking to collei about not having enough bookmark to use on the parts you found insightful. you see, if you press a leaf between dry sheets of paper, you can make an attractive and handy bookmark. i can't guarantee how sturdy it would be, but it's very pretty isn't it? i call them leafmarks." on the book page he showed you, was a beautiful fresh hue of light green, swirled with brown colored leaf-bookmark as he mentioned. it reminded you of his own unique eye color, almost identical in color palette.  there wasn't just one, he had many of those 'leafmarks' in various colors. you had the slight question if it was intentional that he seemingly picked out a specific one resembling his orbs, but decided not to get too ahead of yourself. 

"you're giving them all to me?" you managed to ask, then took the hardcover book from his soft, warm hands. you barely even reacted to your skin touching his, too busy admiring how pretty the leafmarks all were. you even spotted a pink leafmark, you were positive you had never seen such mystic color of leaf before. although you didn’t seem to notice, tighnari’s hand softly shivered when they came in contact with your skin, seemingly lingering for no more than a second as his eyes softened at the pleasant sensation. 

"indeed i am, young scholar. you clearly are enamored and need it more than i do." you smiled at your mentor's kindness, and bowed respectfully.

"thank you, thank you!" tighnari's eyes widened, then made a conflicted face- almost bordering an offended look at your rigid etiquette even when you were alone with him. 

"i'd also appreciate it if you started treating me a bit normally."

"normally?" you questioned.

"i don't want to be regarded as your mentor back home. you and i are both equal scholars here." your eyes couldn't leave tighnari's face as he explained to you in detail.

"i just happen to have lived in sumeru all my life and my expertise is botany. that's the only reason why i know more than you for now. you came from a different nation, and on top of that you haven't even studied botany prior. you don't need to treat me like a superior, it’s unfair for you." the more time you spent with tighnari, you admired how down-to-earth he was. he was humble and warm, kind and responsible. he practically was the main guardian of the forest, yet remained the least arrogant person you've probably ever met. it was so... endearing in a sense, to see.

"...okay. thanks, tighnari. good night." you smiled, and left his office. tighnari, despite his best efforts to hide it, his ears perked up at the mention of his name. you pretended not to notice how happily his ears jumped and how he looked like he was fighting a small smile. 

that was the first time you called him by his name, not titles.

-

3. about Tighnari - under his care

"are you acclimating to the rainforest? I suggest that you keep your eyes and ears open. take care of yourself, and if anything happens, just flag down a Forest Ranger." the unexpected question took you by slight surprise.

"asking if i'm getting used to the forest after 4 months is a bit too late, no?" you tilted your head in confusion.

"it never hurts to make sure. the forest isn't a playground and i'd hate for you to get hurt." ah, so he was merely concerned about you.

"by forest ranger, would that include you as well, mister forest watcher? i could call you chief watcher, even." you jokingly stated, teasing him as you do often.

"of course i'm included. i'm always willing to take care of you whenever you need me. just a call and i'll be there." he said these words in such a casual tone despite your slight playfulness, yet it brought immense comfort with a wave of warmth blooming in your chest. you were certain that he held no deeper meanings, his duty was to ensure the safety of the people and the ecosystem. still, it brought a smile on your face. maybe, a small corner of your heart wished that just maybe you wished it was more than that. 

'whenever i need him, huh' you thought with a bashful smile you tried not to show.

"that's very assuring to hear, tighnari. thanks." you glanced outside to slyly hide the uncontrollable, giddy smile. 

little did you notice the small dust of rose hue on the forest watcher's cheek, his ear hanging a little lower than normal. he couldn't take his eyes off you, even when you averted his gaze and stared out the window. he had gotten so used to having you in his office, it felt empty and cold the moment you left. and tighnari was no fool, he had a hunch on why exactly he seemed to have difficulty tearing his eyes off you, why he suddenly grooms his tail even more than before, why he hurries to finish his paperwork so he could have more time with you without worrying about them. he knows, but he chose to cast them aside for now.

for now, tighnari opted to just cough, and then avoid your eye contact for the rest of your conversation.

-

4. mornings with tighnari.

you signed up for this yourself, you bitterly mumbled. you did this to yourself when you deliberately found tighnari and offered your assistance first on your own free will, for the morning patrols. you barely even thought it over, or found no necessity to. it was so that you could see first-hand which plants were which instead of burying your head in the books to no end. on top of that, tighnari was possibly the most knowledgeable person in the area to educate you more if you had trouble with anything. he never looked irritated when you asked questions, and explained in great depth within the best of his capabilities. again, he was an excellent mentor, you were grateful you applied for the Avidya forest section, after all.

but despite your blatant admiration towards your mentor, morning patrols were not a part of your duties as an exchange scholar. it was your thirst for knowledge and perhaps, the slight warmth in your chest when you realized you could spend time alone with your mentor that brought you to your conclusion, of course. you tried hard to dismiss the second half of your reason though, even to yourself. you conveniently concealed your lingering thoughts and acclaimed it to be mere curiosity and fascination with the ecosystem. 

unfortunately, you just weren’t expecting the forest to be this deep, with possibly millions of passages and places he was supposed to check. Avidya forest was big and vast, and circling it around to no corner unturned was certainly not written on your academic program before you left your hometown, neither did tighnari warn you about the insane amount of stamina necessity- not even half an hour and you were already struggling to keep up. you attempted to pretend like you weren’t on the edge of passing out behind tighnari, the desperate attempt at grasping your last shred of pride but you could’ve sworn he noticed your wobbly legs a while ago. 

"we already went over this place, right?" you tried your best to sound like you weren't on the edge of collapsing out of breath, but of course nothing escaped tighnari's abnormally huge ears.

“revising the area. you’re that exhausted already? do you need time to catch your breath?” you weren’t sure if you had the leisure to comprehend his playful, teasing tone.

“just a moment… just a moment is all I ask.” you finally swallowed your pride and stopped in your tracks. you held onto a tree next to you, slightly crouching to catch your breath. but just before you plopped onto the incredibly soft-looking soil below, tighnari gestured you to wait for a while and went through his belongings in search of something.

after a short moment, he pulled out a mat. a thick, warm-looking one at that.

“sit on this, the ground is still moist from the morning dew. can’t have you catching cold now under my watch, can we, newbie scholar?” you slightly frowned at his peculiar choice of nickname even after several months, but you still opted to quietly accept the mat.

“isn’t this too small for the both of us?” you mumbled after setting it down on the ground.

“indeed it is. because it’s for you.” he stated like it was the most obvious truth in the world. 

oh. 

you suddenly found yourself conscious of your movements. is this even good manners, to receive your mentor’s mat and then proceed to sit on it alone? then again, you recalled the conversation back at his office. he said it himself clearly, he didn’t like unnecessary formalities between the two of you. you were sure tighnari would sigh and flick your forehead if you put up the formalities again. 

well in that case…

“thank you so much, tighnari” you smiled and gratefully accepted his offer. when you finally relaxed on the ground, you sighed in relief. the mat he brought was as cozy as it looked, you loved how warm it was. Tighnari on the other hand, looked extremely pleased that you accepted his help without the frigid manners you seem to carry. 

“it’s so warm, do you carry this with you every day when you patrol? must be heavy.” you noticed how thick the material was as you ran your fingers over the material.

“…not quite.” i only brought it because you were joining today- he held his tongue from adding unnecessary remarks. you hummed in acknowledgment and enjoyed the small break.

out of the blue, tighnari crouched down to your level, silently reaching out next to your sitting figure to straighten the wrinkled part of the mat below - when you hadn’t even realized it was wrinkled and messy. his sudden actions left you unintentionally staring in awe at his unfairly pretty face and kind gesture. when he suddenly leaned in to finally finish pulling the mat to be as comfortable as possible for you to sit on, he looked directly at you.

you prepared yourself for the playful snarky remark he always shot after correcting your mistakes, but this time he didn’t. when he finished fixing the mat for you, he just smiled at you warmly and stared at you without moving away. you mind seemed to freeze when you noticed how he still kept crouching to your level, his body in a slight close proximity.  

suddenly, you were more nervous than you could’ve imagined from mere eye contact. after all, you weren’t sure if you’ve ever seen his face this up close before. his sunkissed healthy skin, brown eyes with prominent green hue swirling deep near his iris, and long lashes to compliment them. his hair seemed to be naturally straight, you'd never seen him prepare any oil of the sort like he grooms his tail. you huffed internally when you noticed how faintly pink his lips were, how was he this ethereal without trying? it really is unfair.

little did you know, he was having the exact same thoughts about you. his eyes seemed to silently observe the details on your face, pupils dilating slightly from the sight. the two of you looked into each other’s eyes one more time, then noticed on both ends, how heavy-tension the atmosphere was. 

almost at the same time, you two looked away, your head dropping low to stare at the ground as tighnari swiftly averted his gaze sidewards. 

thankfully, tighnari was the first to break the awkward silence, still crouched down to your level. something about him maintaining his stance was endearing, like he wanted to be closer to you despite his uncomfortable position- and who knows, maybe that was the truth. you silently hoped it was.

“listen! that’s the sound of morning dew dripping upon the leaves.” you blinked at the random remark he made. judging from his expression, he looked like he wasn’t making jokes, so you focused on hearing the oddly specific sound he mentioned out of the blue- of course to no avail.

"i don't have extraordinary hearing skills like someone, remember?" you squinted and tried your best to focus on the sound, whatever you could hear. unfortunately, all that graced your ears was the sound of leaves rustling from the calm breeze, and maybe the sound of sunrise if such thing even existed. it was no use, you had never heard dew droplets on the leaves before and was fairly positive that you never would be able to within capabilities of a human ear.

“i keep forgetting how unfortunately small your ears are. must be hard, unable to pick up pretty noises like these, hmm?” he diverted his attention to your ears, tilting his head and leaning in even closer to observe how different yours were in comparison to his own. your brows furrowed and you shot back playfully.

“excuse me, I seem to remember that you are a fennec fox, biologically programmed to have significantly higher sense of hearing. and my ears function normally as a human’s do anyways.” tighnari laughed, he always enjoyed getting on your nerves to an appropriate extent.

amidst your lively conversation, both of you noticed life slowly grow brighter inside Avidya forest. you couldn’t help but notice tighnari’s normally sharp eyes mellow at the sight of an ethereal sunrise. you stared at the rosy hue cast across the eternal sky, shining in its glory unapologetically. amidst the depth of Avidya forest, life awoke alongside the first shreds of sunlight. the strings of liveliness spread vastly from birds chirping giddily, some of the flower petals blooming as if awakening from slumber and curious sounds of the forest embraced the two of you.

and on top of that, you were equally busy admiring how endearing tighnari looked right now, his expression similar to a little boy who’s gotten a good night’s kiss on the forehead after his mother read his favorite bedtime story. the forest watcher looked peaceful, basking in the first rays of the day next to you. it was curious in a sense, surely he must enjoy this breathtaking view every day on patrol. yet, he looked as though he was the happiest one in teyvat at this very moment, like it was his first time experiencing such magnificent scenery. 

an adoring smile made its way on your lips as you rested your chin on your hand. quietly, you continued to admire the side of tighnari you’d never seen before.

perhaps, under the glassy orange skies and glory of sunlight pouring on his skin, was your favorite sight of him thus far.

-

5. afternoons with tighnari.

“catching the chief watcher slack off, today must be my lucky day.” tighnari’s ears did a small twitch at the sound of your familiar voice. 

“i’ll have you know i’m on my lunch break. there isn’t anything i’m slacking off on, young scholar.” tighnari replied as composed as ever despite the way his ears kept excitedly twitching even after he was long aware of your welcome presence. 

“besides, during lunch breaks, I like to sit in a tree and admire the sunlight streaming through the canopy. though if I'm not careful, I'll fall asleep…” his unexpectedly cute concern and habit of admiring the forest like he doesn’t live here permanently tickled at your heartstrings. you bit back a smile when he immediately moved to make space next to himself while looking at your approaching figure with an expectant gaze. a small hummingbird flew past you two, making tighnari’s ears twitch again. no matter how many times you saw that, his ears and the twitches, reactions were quite endearing. 

“you were already half asleep when i saw you, chief watcher” you giggled when he rolled his eyes at your accusation. 

“well, since you’re sensitive to sounds, you could be a light sleeper to begin with, right? maybe resting for a while during lunchtime isn’t so bad.” you continued lightheartedly, your concerns over his health and overworking tendencies showing in your tone.

tighnari seemed to pick up on your caring tone when his brows raised slightly in pleasant surprise. to tighnari, someone taking care of him and not the vice versa was uncommon. he was known to be pretty much the foundation of the forest watchers, chief in almost every branches of what happens in Avidya forest- there was nothing going on in this forest where he wasn’t aware. and maybe because of his “status of authority” he so-badly despised, most people knew better than to pry on their superior’s personal life even if it was mere concern. for tighnari, the way you treated him and regarded him brought warmth and gratitude. and his feelings were clearly evident in his gaze directed to you, if you had the determination to open up your eyes. 

“it’s amazing, really. seeing how much you care for the forest and ecosystem.” you mumbled absentmindedly while making your way next to him and sat down. almost immediately, you realized what he meant by the specific description of “sunlight streaming through the canopy.” it truly did look divine, Avidya forest always did. 

tighnari wanted to answer with a sassy comeback to your words until he realized you were being serious and was currently looking at the tree and the sunlight with a big smile on your face. he didn’t even have the leisure to wonder how close you two were right now, you looked so peaceful, so… beautiful. he felt warmth spread in his chest as he looked at you being so comfortable around him, he quietly wished he could help you release your tension.

“it’s… expected for a forest watcher.” he barely managed to reply, keeping his gaze on you as discreetly as possible. 

“except, it really isn’t. it takes a lot to appreciate the small things in life. you’re quite humble and down-to-earth, it’s refreshing really” you continued as you suddenly felt the urge to let him know just how wonderful company he was. 

tighnari wasn’t one to blush and hide his face at compliments, especially from scholars under his care. well, let’s just say that you were an exception with the way he awkwardly coughed and pretended like he was wiping his mouth as his cheeks flushed rosy red. 

-

6. a very good evening with tighnari.

“good evening! I'm preparing to go observe bioluminescent flora. want to come?” you jumped a bit from the unexpected voice coming from your door.

“tighnari!” you snapped your head to the direction, finally realizing that the intruder happened to be your mentor.

“did I startle you? I apologize, your door was open so I assumed.” tighnari mentioned. sure, your door was open but your original thought was to let fresh air in your room, not invite visitors. you admit that he wasn’t exactly unwelcome, though. tighnari was… different. 

“are you in the mood for a stroll, young scholar?” your ears perked in interest as you met his eyes glinting with evident joy. 

“bioluminescent flora glows every night, but their light is different this time of the year. the color changes, and they shine in an iridescent glow, almost. it’s very attractive for sightseeing.” his idea sounded absolutely beautiful, you nodded quickly in enthusiasm. besides, your mentor himself also looked unusually excited, he must be looking forward to looking at the floras probably even more than you were. his excitement brought a smile to your lips- his giddiness was highly contagious, it seems.     

“oh, I’ll just quickly grab my memo. I expect today will be another day of extended learning from our chief watcher.” you giggled and quickly went through your desk in search of that one small memo you keep visible in case.

except, your search was hindered when you felt tighnari reach out and place his hand on yours softly and slightly hesitantly. your eyes widened at the featherlight soft touch slowly turning firmer until his fingers gently laced around yours. your mouth gaped slightly, then heat flushed your cheeks in realization and the possible implications of his intimate touch- your stare fixated on your linked hands.

one thing that unexpectedly calms your nerves down was when you realized his own hand was shaking slightly, indicating his nervousness. you were no exception, your breath hitched the moment you felt his skin on yours. it was made even worse when he turned your other hand around and proceeded to slip his fingers through yours, entwining them together, now both hands in his. the reassuring squeeze didn't help your racing heart one bit.

you remained positively speechless, unsure how you should even reciprocate, squeeze his hand? speak?

thankfully, he spoke first.

“it’s not… academic, (name). no memo-taking or learning. just… a stroll with me. is that okay?” tighnari couldn’t tear his eyes off you, he had never seen you look this endearing before even when he always found himself admiring you in silence discreetly to you. perhaps he enjoyed your stiff body language out of nervousness and your wandering eyes traveling everywhere but him far more than he assumed. who knew you could look this adorable flustered. 

you finally realized his intentions clearly, still unable to take your eyes off your connected hands because you had a feeling you wouldn’t be able to look straight into his eyes without your heart threatening to leap out of your chest. you couldn’t deny the warmth you felt not only from his hand holding yours but also from how he keeps glancing at you for the slightest concern in case of your discomfort. his grip on your hand was nowhere near forceful, if anything it was tender and comforting, the way his hands wrapped around yours. you could easily pull away if you wanted, but you fought back a small smile as you squeezed his hand softly in response. 

tighnari’s ears twitched in excitement. 

so all along, you weren’t imagining his tenderness towards you. he felt warm and welcoming, you couldn't help but squeeze his hands again gently in response, biting the inside of your cheek in an attempt to control the growing smile. 

"of course. should we go?" you mumbled, gaze still lingering on your hands in his.

neither of you spoke about your still-connected hand when you left your room, and it stayed that way throughout the entirety of the "stroll". 

both of you quietly hoped that the linked hands would become a regular occurrence from now on. 

7. home.

surely enough, holding hands had become a more regular occurrence after your small date observing the nocturnal flowers and bioluminescent flora that one warm evening. you also decided you would accompany tighnari every morning for patrol even though you barely manage to drag yourself out of bed when the sun wasn’t even out yet, but it was all worth it every time tighnari picked you up with a gentle smile on his face and sometimes tucked a small flower he grew himself in your hair. it had become an unspoken habit to patrol with your hand in his, basking in your warmth as well as make sure you didn’t stray too far. perhaps it was his inner protectiveness, perhaps it was his monogamous nature speaking but he silently knew he felt uneasy when you remained out of his sight for an extended amount of time. tighnari knew how deep his feelings had grown, and he found himself more and more infatuated with you as he spent time with you. the feeling was highly mutual, and you two felt more comfort in each other’s company in the comforting depths of Avidya forest. 

come to think of it, your time in sumeru was limited from the moment you set foot into the lands. now, there wasn’t anyone on your trails that would kick you out of the borders should you extend your journey, and you were glad you hadn’t caused any trouble in sumeru as it would possibly make you the unfortunate candidate of general mahamatra cyno’s watch. tighnari seemed to be close friends with him, but from the way he not-so-subtly quizzed you of your intentions and studies you pursued like an interview, the awkward conversation intensified by his stone cold face with absolutely no hint of anything besides blankness. you couldn’t help but be reminded of how intimidated you were on your first encounter with him when you absentmindedly mentioned the occasion. tighnari had assured you with a quiet laugh that he was merely curious, and it made you quietly wonder how to not draw attention to yourself from now on. you couldn’t help but remember his awkward jokes he slipped in to potentially ease your tension but it might’ve had just the opposite effects. tighnari seemed pleasantly surprised and happy you and cyno seemed to be getting along as one of the two dearest people he held in his heart. you couldn’t help the slight hesitation if you actually were “getting along” but at least the general mahamatra seemed to care not to intimidate you too much. you suppose time would tell.  

your mind returned to the peaceful silence you two shared at present, his thumb gently caressing the back of your hand as he kept a soft hold on them. you deeply enjoyed spending time with tighnari like this, but you couldn’t help but be reminded of your soon-to-leave plans every time at moments like right now. time was flowing fast especially now that you had found something- someone worth pursuing here in a foreign land. both of you were silently aware of the fact, and neither of you had the heart to bring it up just yet especially when the fresh start of a new relationship was so, so comforting and full of life. 

you were resting your head on tighnari’s shoulder, sitting on the branch as you looked at the willow tree you two met under. you couldn’t believe how peaceful and right the world felt when you were with him, you never knew your life could be like… this. amidst the comforting atmosphere, tighnari softly broke the silence. 

“(name)” his voice sounded quiet and somewhat unsure, a tone you scarcely ever heard him use. you looked at him in attention. 

“yes?” 

“i…” he spent a few seconds pondering on just how he could bring this up. just from his hesitance, you knew what he was thinking about, and it was perhaps the time to discuss the elephant in the room and hopefully get the slightly hefty conversation over with. 

with a single sigh, tighnari stabilized his voice and looked at you. 

“i think we need to discuss your time left here in your curriculum.” you bit the inside of your cheek at the expected, yet conflicting topic. it wasn’t as though you hadn’t thought about it before, it just demanded both of you to be present and willing to open your heart and opinions for you to come to a conclusion together. this tension perhaps was the reason why you seem to have been unconsciously avoiding this moment. with a soft sigh, you nodded softly in response.  

“less than a month left, yes” you softly replied, your eyes still focused on the willow tree you met him under. in a way, the tree had granted both of your wish. but you don’t seem to remember asking for a loving boyfriend “forever” or anything of the sort. a boyfriend, yes. but the duration… maybe you should’ve added the time while you were at it. 

before you could organize your thoughts and answer what your stance was, tighnari softly rested his head on your shoulder, gently wrapping his arms around your waist to draw your figure closer, to silence the slight hesitancy and worry of potentially being let down if you weren’t on the same page. 

“i can’t ask you to leave behind your life at snezhnaya and accompany me at a foreign land… but at the same time, (name)...” tighnari laced his fingers with you close, the warmth of his hand radiating in your palm as his other arm was holding you tightly in his embrace, his breath softly hitting your neck. 

“i… can’t just bid farewell and thank you for the memories. i didn’t start this relationship with you for lighthearted fun or for some teenage dream.” maybe you could have made a playful joke about neither of you being teenagers at his statement, but tighnari’s proximity, his protective embrace and his mellow voice echoing at the back of your mind, you couldn’t help but softly pat his head as he hugged you tight. 

“i’m not with you just for the thrill, dear.” you replied quietly, resting your cheek on the top of his head. tighnari seemed to let out a slightly shaky breath, an indication of relaxation when he finally got the confirmation he desperately needed from you. that he wasn’t the only one completely infatuated with you. 

“are you aware… of what we are? what we would become, and if you’re ready, if you’re sure?”

“I-” you opened your mouth to respond, then closed it to give him time to express his worries. 

“fennec foxes mate for life, (name). our kind is highly monogamous and i… have to warn you about it before our relationship progresses more than it already has. we aren’t as flexible as some humans prefer.” his soft voice cooed, his somewhat stern tone silently reminding you to listen carefully and give this matter a serious thought. you blinked and finally realized the reason why he was unusually clingy and vulnerable than usual, so he truly couldn’t let you go. 

a small, loving smile appeared on your lips as you snuggled closer to him, still running your fingers through his hair and sometimes gently playing with his ears, making him sigh in comfort. 

“what i mean to say is… you need to have your mind set. i take you very seriously, much more than you may think at this early stage of our bond.”

“... dear…” you softly whispered and held his cheeks with both your hands, carefully lifting him up from your shoulder to meet his gaze. he truly looked lovestruck, his eyes glistened with tender care, devotion and affection all directed to you, and the sight made your chest warm up in overflowing love. 

“tighnari, i don’t regard our relationship in a light manner. i don’t see you as someone less than my partner for life. i take us… very seriously too.” tighnari could’ve sworn he fell in love with you all over again, finally getting your final answer he desperately needed to hear. he loved you, loved you too much to let you go, loved you too much not to cling onto you tight and keep you with him, to care for you. yet, he always had the voice nagging to him about how humans weren’t like him, that you could walk away any time, that humans weren’t as devoted as his kind. and just like that, all of his worries seem to melt away at your soothing, promising words that you whispered. 

“you wouldn’t be asking me to leave behind my life at snezhnaya because i won’t. i’m a scholar here and a scholar back home, and sumeru is the land of wisdom, no?’ tighnari’s ears twitched and perked up beyond control at your positive implication of words. 

“you mean…”

“i wouldn’t be throwing away anything to start with, tighnari. i’ll just be moving onto a new lifestyle. change to my environment. you aren’t asking me to abandon anything, please don’t worry. i’m choosing…” you suddenly halted mid-sentence at your cheesy words, looking away from his eyes to seem as normal as possible.

“i’m choosing… you. on my own will. you aren’t making me do anything.” and with that final confirmation, tighnari all but leapt to embrace you tightly. his hand wrapped around your shoulders, holding the back of your head as he pressed your face into his shoulder. he held you like you meant the world to him, pressing soft kisses on your forehead as he happily caressed the back of your head comfortingly. 

“thank you, thank you… thank you, love…” your face heated up from how he repeated the words, pressing loving kisses all over your face after he pulled away. your lips connected softly, his hands gently holding your face like you were the light of his world, the reason for his existence. you were, from now on to him- his one and only. you smiled into the gentle kiss, placing your hands on his shoulder, tilting your head to move your lips in sync to his sugarsweet kiss. tighnari’s hold on your face was so, so tender, his thumb caressed your cheek ever so softly as your kiss prolonged, the warm rays of the evening sun wrapping you both in its cozy heat. 

you pulled away, smiling at tighnari as he still held your cheeks. you couldn’t help but lean into his hand, placing your own over his. 

“i love you… i love you so much” tighnari couldn’t take his eyes off of you, you looked perfect right now, the golden sun pouring on your skin, your cheeks heating up in his palm from fluster, and the relaxed smile on your lips- the enchanted, lovestruck glint in your gaze as you two looked into each other’s eyes. you were always beautiful to him, but you truly did look absolutely breathtaking when you were in his arms, just where you belong. 

with another soft gentle kiss to your forehead and your soft laughter echoing through Avidya forest, even the sunsets seemed to embrace the young couple hopelessly in love, letting them bask in its ethereal glow. 

finale.

[deliciousangelfestival]

Tears In His Ferrari || Chp 1

Character: Bucky Barnes x Farmer!Reader

Words Count: 2,070

Summary: Bucky Barnes, used to a life of luxury, takes on farm challenges in a bet with his father. Mud-stained Ferraris and a rustic farmhouse lead to unexpected personal growth, guided by the stern mentorship of Y/N, a farmer making his city-boy life difficult.

Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi

Thank you to anyone who gave a like, reblog, and left a comment. It motivated me to write more. 

Chapters: Chp 1, Chp 2, Chp 3 , Chp 4 , Chp 5 , Chp 6 , Chp 7 , Chp 8 , Chp 9 , Chp 10 , Chp 11 , Chp 12.

Under the relentless blaze of the scorching sun, Bucky Barnes, the pampered scion of the country's largest retail business, was far removed from the air-conditioned boardrooms of his family's empire. Grumbling incessantly, he swatted away the relentless flies that seemed to thrive in the rural heat. 

"Pick them up gently, Bucky. We don't want scrambled eggs before breakfast," Y/N instructed sternly, her eyes narrowing as Bucky clumsily reached for the first egg. The delicate shell slipped through his fingers, meeting the unforgiving ground with a sharp crack.

"Really, city boy? You gotta treat 'em like they're made of glass," Y/N scolded, her tone unyielding. Bucky, now sporting a mix of irritation and embarrassment, shot back with a sarcastic retort.

"Glass? They're just eggs, not Fabergé. And who knew these chickens were so high-maintenance?"

Bucky, wiping sweat from his brow, replied with a half-smile of his own, “This is absurd. I'm a Barnes, not a farmer.”

How could the sole heir of the country's largest retail company find himself toiling like this? It all stemmed from a bet he made with his father.

2 weeks ago:

Under the glittering Dubai night sky, Bucky, driven by the thrill of rebellion, decided to join a race car event despite his father's explicit warnings. The roar of the engines reverberated through the darkness as Bucky sped along the circuit, the city lights blending into a streak of colors.

As Bucky pulled into the pit garage, the bright lights revealed an unexpected sight – his father, stern-faced and waiting. The realization struck Bucky like a sudden brake, his heart pounding in rhythm with the fading echoes of the race.

His father's disapproval was palpable as he approached, a storm gathering in his gaze.

"Dad!" Bucky exclaimed, but his words were drowned by the tirade that followed. His father, fueled by a mix of anger and concern, chased after him, leaving no room for escape.

The victory that should have been a sweet taste of triumph was overshadowed by the looming storm of his father's wrath.

His father, face etched in a stern expression, strode towards Bucky, a potent mix of anger and disappointment simmering beneath the surface. Bucky's heart sank, realizing that the victory he had just tasted was now tainted by the disapproval in his father's eyes.

"Damn it!" Bucky muttered as he reluctantly shut off the engine and climbed out of the race car. His father's presence loomed over him, a formidable figure casting a shadow on Bucky's moment of recklessness.

His dad, arms crossed, began to unleash a torrent of frustration. "For the whole year, you roamed overseas to live your wildlife. You promised me after graduating that you'd take a year off before entering the company."

Bucky hails from a family that owns the largest retail company in the country, a business empire built over generations. As the sole heir to this colossal enterprise, Bucky enjoys the privileges that come with his family's success. 

Bucky is set to inherit Verve, a retail giant in the country. Despite the family's success, his spoiled and impulsive nature creates a conflict between his privileged upbringing and the responsibilities tied to the business. 

Seated on a nearby bench, Bucky nibbled on his snacks, a subconscious attempt to deflect the gravity of the situation. His eyes, darting between the snacks and his father, conveyed a mix of guilt and defiance.

He heard his father's words but struggled to understand why he, the heir to the family's business empire, should start as an intern when his friends effortlessly landed positions in their family companies.

"Why intern, Dad?" Bucky interjected his tone, a mix of frustration and confusion. "We own the company. Why don't I get the same treatment as my friends?"

The tension in the pit garage hung thick as his father expressed his feelings. "I'm fed up with it!" he declared, his voice a mixture of anger and disappointment.

Bucky, attempting to downplay the situation, replied nonchalantly, "Dad, chill. At least I gained some money from this."

His father responded swiftly and cut, "And you blew it all in a second! How can I trust our company to you?"

He rubbed his chest, a physical manifestation of the stress and disappointment weighing on him. "I feel like our ancestors are judging me. They were never big spenders like you."

A moment of silence followed as both father and son grappled with the underlying issues. Bucky's father couldn't shake the feeling that he had spoiled Bucky too much, especially since the loss of Bucky's mother when he was still young.

Feeling offended, Bucky retorted, "Do you think I can't handle my own money? I could make a million in one week."

"Really?" his father questioned, a skeptical look in his eyes.

Bucky, fueled by pride, affirmed, "Yes."

The challenge was set. Bucky's father nodded, "Alright, if you could make our farm profitable with a million, I will give you any position you want in the company."

"Really?" Bucky's eyes widened, a glimmer of opportunity sparking.

"Yes. If you manage to do it, I will never interfere with your life anymore," his father declared. Both of them shook hands, sealing the deal.

But then came the unexpected twist. "By the way, I'm going to cut all your access to your money," his father dropped the bomb.

"What?" Bucky exclaimed, shock and disbelief etched across his face.

"Your great-grandfather started his business with $100. You need to appreciate money, stop wasting it all in one day," his father explained sternly.

"But how am I going to live without money?" Bucky protested, a hint of desperation creeping into his voice.

"I've provided everything you need on the farm," his father countered, emphasizing the gravity of the challenge. "You're my only son, and I don't want you to be a wastrel!"

The moment's intensity lingered in the air as the weight of the challenge and the drastic shift in Bucky's circumstances began to sink in.

Bucky couldn't help but roll his eyes at the daunting challenge ahead. "Fine. I'll show that I can do it on my own. How difficult can it be?" he muttered, perhaps more to reassure himself than anything else.

Oh, how he wished he could take those words back as his Ferrari pulled up to the family farm, the only luxury permitted by his father. To his dismay, the farm appeared desolate and barren, a stark contrast to the lavish lifestyle he was accustomed to.

Bucky, sporting his usual city-boy ensemble of expensive leather shoes and a sleek leather jacket, stepped out of the pristine car only to find the uneven terrain immediately wreaking havoc on his attire. Mud splattered on the once-immaculate leather shoes, a cruel irony of the stark contrast between luxury and the rustic farm reality.

As Bucky surveyed the damage to his meticulously polished shoes, his eyes widened with panic. "No, no, no. You’ve got to be kidding me," he muttered frantically, attempting to wipe away the mud with his hands, only succeeding in making matters worse.

The realization of his Red Ferrari parked amidst the farm's untamed landscape hit him like a ton of bricks.

A look of horror crossed Bucky's face as he surveyed the mud-smeared exterior of his prized possession. "This is not happening," he exclaimed, his voice laced with a mix of disbelief and anxiety.

The once-gleaming Ferrari now stood as a symbol of the clash between opulence and the unyielding demands of rural life, leaving Bucky in a state of mild panic about the fate of his beloved car amid this unexpected farm adventure.

His panic only intensified as he turned his attention to the house assigned to him. It was a far cry from the sleek, modern apartment he was accustomed to. With its weathered exterior and superficial charm, the rustic farmhouse left Bucky in shock. 

"Wait, this is my house?" he stammered, disbelief etched across his face. The reality of the situation sank in, and Bucky grappled with the stark contrast between the urban comfort he knew and the quaint simplicity of his new rural abode.

In sheer disbelief, Bucky scratched his head and pulled at his hair. "How am I going to do this? I'm so dead," he lamented, realizing the task's magnitude.

Just as the weight of the situation began to sink in, a voice disrupted his thoughts. "James Barnes?"

Turning around, Bucky saw a woman seated in a farm truck, wearing a practical flannel grey shirt. She stepped out of the truck, her attire markedly suitable for the farm environment.

Still grappling with the shock of the situation, Bucky mustered a response, "The one and only call me Bucky. And you are?"

Undeterred by his casual attitude, the woman retorted with a smirk, "The one who will make your life miserable."

Bucky's eyes widened in disbelief. "Is this how you introduce yourself when meeting a new person?" he shot back, a mixture of surprise and amusement playing across his face. 

Y/N's face remained stoic, her expression unwavering as she delivered the news to Bucky. "I will be straight to the point; your life won't be easy like in the city," she asserted, leaning down to rest her hands on the wooden rail. "I'll be your mentor."

With a pointed finger, she continued, "We're neighbors. My dad asked me to help you." Her tone hinted at an unspoken determination to ensure Bucky's time in the town would be far from a leisurely escape. She was poised, ready to make him regret ever leaving her domain.

Flashback start

Y/N had returned from the farm two days prior, dropping fresh milk on the kitchen cabinet with plans to make cheese—her mother's favorite. Her family, owners of a dairy farm and several crops, had a livelihood deeply rooted in agriculture. The biggest of their ventures was their dairy farm.

As Y/N washed her hands, her father said their family would assist their new neighbor. Y/N, although accustomed to helping neighbors, Y/N couldn't hide her disdain when she heard the name 'Barnes.' She gritted her teeth at the mere mention of the family.

Her aversion to the 'Barnes' name was reflected in her unyielding body language, a subtle tension in her shoulders, and a clenching of her jaw. The prospect of aiding Bucky, the city boy from the family she held some resentment toward, added an unexpected layer of complexity to her already busy life on the farm.

Years ago, in their relentless pursuit of expanding their retail empire, the Barnes family made a business move that significantly impacted Y/N's family farm. The Barnes Corporation, seeking to acquire more land for development, had set its sights on the quaint farmland owned by Y/N's family.

Despite Y/N's family's resistance and the sentimental value attached to their land, the Barnes Corporation, driven by profit, successfully carried out the acquisition, leaving Y/N's family with no choice but to relinquish the farm that had been in their possession for generations.

The ruthless business dealings and lack of empathy from the Barnes family left a bitter taste in Y/N's mouth.

Despite the Barnes Corporation's relentless pursuit of their farmland, Y/N's family salvaged a small piece of their ancestral land.

But, the memories of losing her family's cherished farm to the corporate giant fueled Y/N's resentment and distaste for the Barnes family. 

Flashback end

Y/N flashed Bucky an assuring smile, though it carried an undercurrent of intimidation. Her expression was a blend of warmth and a silent warning. Bucky, feeling the weight of the unspoken challenge, involuntarily gulped.

It was a realization that, from that moment onward, his life was destined to be anything but easy. The smile that seemed promising also bore the weight of a mentorship that would test his resilience in the unfamiliar terrain of the farm.

Still processing the intensity of Y/N's smile, Bucky mumbled uncertainly, “What have I gotten myself into? ... and I have no clue where this is headed." With a mix of trepidation and curiosity in his eyes, he took a hesitant step forward, realizing that the journey ahead was bound to be far more intricate than he had initially bargained for. 

Chapters: Chp 1, Chp 2, Chp 3 , Chp 4 , Chp 5 , Chp 6 , Chp 7

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[hellishjoel]

flora and fauna

1.4k / pairing: javier peña x f!reader

main masterlist | notifications blog

summary: "Nature never did betray the heart that loved her." – William Wordsworth warnings/information:  MA 18+ (minors DNI), smut, oral (f!receiving), nature exhibitionism??? use of petnames (angel, baby, sweetheart, etc.), swearing, reader is able-bodied and wears athletic clothing A/N: this if for the summer lovin' 2024 writing challenge hosted by @pedgito @chaotic-mystery and @amanitacowboy! thank you for having such a fun challenge to start off the summer right! and thank you for letting me join and post a lil late <3 banners made by @saradika-graphics!

It’s Javi’s fault, really. He was the one who decided to disregard the hiking trails and reroute your course. 

He’d never admit that he was wandering.

“You’re lost, aren’t you?” 

He huffs loudly and plants his hands on his hips, brand new hiking boots coming to a halt on the desire path he was determined to follow. 

“Lost is a bit of an exaggeration. We’re exploring.” 

“We’re lost.” 

You yank the folded-up map of the state park out of his hands. The sight of random splatters of green and blue alone is enough to make Javier groan. 

“Point to where we are. Please. Just for my sanity.” 

Javier slowly pushes the aviators he’s wearing to the tip of his nose, looking between you and the map. Both sets of eyes scan across the map before Javi yanks it loose from your fingers. He does the worst thing imaginable and rotates the map a few times, not even sure which easy is up. 

“Come on, we’ll come across somethin’ we recognize.” He folds up the map and stuffs it in his pocket, taking your hand and exploring further through the landscape of trees. 

You follow the sounds of a beautiful stream, where the wildlife drink and the plants are vibrantly green. Javi kneels and splashes some water on his forehead and the back of his neck. Skimming your fingers along the top, you watch as the pretty ripples dance. 

Soon, getting lost was no longer frightening; it had become a blessing in disguise. Both you and Javi worked demanding careers, and stress relief for the two of you had become reduced to drinks at the local cantina or nights in watching the television. 

But this—a day out in nature, with the sun soaking into your skin and reviving something within both of you—was perhaps just what you needed.

By the late afternoon, Javi has you secluded in a wildflower field. You lay on your back, sat up on your elbows as you tip your head back and take in the sweet summer sun. Surrounded by butterfly weed and yellow coneflowers, it seems almost mystical as happy pollinators buzz around you and enjoy the sweet nectar the field offers. 

Javi’s lingering eyes have landed on his own source of nectar. 

“If we’re lost,” he starts, eyes lusting over as he takes in the sight of your skin below your hiking shorts and smirks, “then we can do whatever we want.” 

No- was he seriously suggesting this?

“Right now?” You whisper. 

You can’t deny the thought doesn’t make your stomach flutter with excitement. Doing it out here surrounded by the flora and fauna. 

Javi sits up beside you, his hand already skirting up the top of your warm thigh. Air is taken from your lungs, and you find yourself holding it, in awe of what he might do when no one is around. 

“This okay?” His gravely voice whispers. You purse your lips and look around, but there seems to be nothing more than literal birds and bees spying on you. 

With your shy nod of approval, Javi slowly peels down your brightly colored shorts and panties, allowing you to kick them off once around your ankles. 

Javi takes in your sweet skin and mutters something approvingly, your pretty pussy on display just for him - even out in the open like this. 

His fingers tentatively squish into the sensitive skin of your inner thighs, pushing them apart wider to allow him more access. He sinks to lay on his stomach, fingers brushing along a path that trails with goosebumps.

A weak sigh leaves your parted lips as Javi spreads your folds with his index and middle finger, in awe of the arousal that’s already starting to flood your core. 

“I think you like doin’ it out in the open, princess,” his eyes meet your more desperate ones, teeth nibbling on your lower lip with anticipation. 

“What do good girls say?”

You extend your hand and run your fingers through his dark hair, allowing a shaky breath to leave you as sweat grows tacky on the back of your neck and the hinge of your legs. 

“Please, Javi, I want you.”

With a degrading smirk, he tuts almost disapprovingly. “So naughty. Want me anywhere I can have ya, huh?”

You nod feverishly, and that’s enough to get him to continue. 

He presses a pretty kiss against your pearl, feeling her twitch under even the lightest of his touches. Javi leans in once more and presses a longer, sloppier one on your pussy, sucking ever so lightly that has heat simmering across your skin. A long whine leaves the depth of your throat, your fingers weaving through Javi’s locks as you keep him close. 

He darkly chuckles and knows that your sense of patience is waning thin. 

“You want me to eat this pussy, angel?”

“Fuck,” you huff, “please, Javi, I’ve been good.” 

“You have, baby, you have.” He mutters and moves in closer. 

Javi doesn’t so much as eat you out as he does makeout with your cunt, holding your hand by his head and feeling the squeezes of what makes you feel good. 

He slowly lets go of your hand and nudges the tip of his finger against your entrance. You’re begging at this point for the heavenly stretch, nodding your head almost anxiously. 

He doesn’t start with just one; he knows you can take two. Your back arches with a gasp that enters the open field, and you instinctively put your hand over your mouth. 

“Come on, baby, I wanna hear you be loud for me. No one’s gonna hear you but me.”

It’s difficult to pull your hand away, but once you do, Javi continues to push two of his thick fingers inside your entrance.

The burn is insatiable, causing your stomach to clench with excitement. 

“Please,” you moan out into the grass, clutching the soil and flowers between your fist with need. 

He starts a steady pace, but soon, it’s picking up enough to make you moan his name repeatedly. 

You were free out here, with every other creature that was free and happily existing. This feels like a dream, one where your lover would take you in such a beautiful place. 

Javi is quick to bring you down to Earth, his fingers curling inside you and leaving you breathless as heat spills down your spine. He suckles your clit before returning to fluid circles that massage your throbbing clit, losing your breath with how good he’s eating you out. 

“M’close,” you whisper, feeling a bead of sweat trickle down your temple. When your open your eyes, you see the most ravenous thing you’ve ever seen; Javi’s pink tongue extended and flicking against your clit, his dark eyes lusted over, and his fingers making your pussy squirt amongst the wildflowers. 

“Fuck!” You whine, your legs shaking as your orgasm crashes against you, the knots in your stomach finally plucking loose. Your lungs fill with air as you cry out his name, Javi not stopping as he eagerly laps up your release. 

He grunts against your core, moaning lowly and watching in awe as his eyes roll into the back of his head. 

Your bleary eyes see Javi rut his hips against the ground, his fist at your hip clutching nothing but the roots of grass that he had ripped from the ground. 

“Fuck,” he breathes, pulling off your core and seeing his face smothered in your arousal, “Taste so fucking sweet on my tongue, baby.” 

The world soon begins to form around you, but not until Javi puts your panties and athletic shorts back into place, a shy grin on your face as you glance around out of habit, seeing only nature watching. 

Javi licks his lips and uses his forearm to wipe away any other lacquer, smirking as his eyes roam over your body. 

“We should really start finding our way back.” You trail off, attempting to find your balance as you wipe away the dirt on the back of your legs and hands. 

Javi playfully laughs and shakes his head, following you to stand. “We’re not lost. We’re like a mile from the car. I’ve been wantin’ to take you here for a while.”

You stop in your tracks, dumbfounded, glancing around a bit confused. 

“We’re not lost?” You try not to be shrill, but you’re quick to smack his pec with the back of your hand. 

“You think I would get us lost? Please.” He says jokingly, taking your hand and escorting you out of your perfect fantasy. 

Through the trail of trees and following the stream upwards as the sun melts against the horizon, it’s enough to make you wish you sort of did grow lost. Because maybe you both could stay like that forever. 

main masterlist | notifications blog

[i-woke-up-at-4am-for-this]

Otter Neuvillette

Neuvillette x GN!Reader

Summary: There is one secret about Neuvillette that no one in Teyvat knows: he has the remarkable ability to shape-shift into a cute sea otter. This unique ability is a reflection of his deep connection to water and his desire for moments of solitude and peace.

One fateful day, as you collect data on plant species along the coast, you come across a disturbing scene. A lone sea otter, under attack by Fontemer Aberrant Crabs, struggles for its life.

A/N: This is my first time writing ^^

On an idyllic day in the tranquil Beryl Region, you were leisurely gathering data on the local plant species. The gentle rhythm of your exploration led you to the shoreline, where an unsettling sight unfolded before you. A lone sea otter, besieged by a group of menacing Fontemer Aberrant Crabs, fought desperately for its life. Without a second thought, you sprang into action, unaware that this seemingly ordinary otter concealed an extraordinary identity—the very Chief Justice of Fontaine, Monsieur Neuvillette himself.

Approaching the scene, you raised your voice to divert the crabs' attention away from the distressed otter. "Hey!" you shouted, flinging rocks towards the aggressors to protect the otter. As the crabs retreated into the ocean, you cautiously approached the otter, who had huddled into a protective ball, concealing its face with its paws.  "Hey there, little buddy," you whispered soothingly, crouching down to its level and tenderly caressing its head. With gentle strokes, you comforted the otter, who responded with a soft chirp, its eyes filled with gratitude.

Concerned for the otter's well-being, you inquired, though fully aware that animals couldn't comprehend human language, "Where's your family, buddy?" However, your attention was soon drawn to the otter's wounded arm, a clear reminder of the recent struggle. "Oh, you poor thing," you sympathized, "Let me tend to your injuries before you swim back home." Scooping the otter gently into your arms, you made your way back to your nearby campsite, your heart touched by the vulnerable creature in your care.

Settling the otter on a soft blanket at your campsite, you meticulously cleansed its wounds with a clean cloth, offering solace and relief from its pain. The otter seemed to find comfort in your presence, nuzzling its body and face against your hands as you tenderly attended to its injuries.

"Are you hungry, little one?" you inquired, rummaging through your supplies and offering a raw fish. To your surprise, the otter seemed uninterested in the fish but eagerly eyed a plate of sandwiches you had prepared for dinner. "You prefer a tuna sandwich, perhaps?"

The otter's eyes widened with anticipation upon spotting the tuna sandwich, and it chirped with enthusiasm, extending a paw toward the plate, as if imploring you to share. With a warm smile, you obliged, offering the otter the prized sandwich, which it eagerly devoured. It was evident that this was a particular culinary delight for the otter.

Even after savoring its meal to satisfaction, the otter continued to nuzzle and seek your companionship, its eyes conveying a heartfelt desire to remain by your side. As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a soothing glow across the landscape, you contemplated the otter's silent plea, tempted to let it spend the night alongside you.

"Hmm... You still need time to heal," you mused, gently petting the otter, your fingers tracing its unique features, "Maybe you can sleep with me. It's dangerous for you to be out alone at night." While your heart longed to keep this adorable creature with you, your conscience reminded you of the importance of wildlife preservation. "Animals belong in the wild, and I think I could get into trouble if I keep one for myself," you sighed, resigned to your role as a temporary protector, "Oh well, I'm going to cuddle with you to my heart's content tonight, my little baby!" With that, you bestowed a gentle kiss upon the otter's fluffy cheek.

The otter responded with an affectionate nuzzle, its whiskers fluttering with delight. As the sun dipped below the horizon, you and the otter nestled against each other, lulled by the soothing sounds of the ocean.

Morning arrived, and you woke up feeling a weight on your chest. Groggily, your hand began to explore the unexpected presence, and you muttered, "Baby, you feel so heavy." Your eyes snapped open as your fingers encountered smooth, silky hair, not fur. To your astonishment, you discovered the Chief Justice, Monsieur Neuvillette, lying on your chest.

Gasping in disbelief, you opened your eyes to behold the Chief Justice, his supple body nestled within your embrace. His expression mirrored your shock, a deep shade of crimson flushing across his face. "Er... it's.... It's not what it looks like," he stammered, his gaze shifting away in embarrassment. He struggled to find words to explain the unexpected situation, his composure faltering. "I... um... I..."

Your cheeks burned with a mixture of confusion and embarrassment. "Monsieur Neuvillette? Why are you here?" you inquired, staring at the Chief Justice, utterly perplexed. He still appeared flustered, and you urged him to collect his thoughts.

Recalling that you had tended to an injured otter, not the Chief Justice, and not recalling any alcoholic consumption, a wild idea crossed your mind. "I know it sounds crazy, but... were you the otter I saved yesterday?"

The Chief Justice furrowed his brows, his face reddening. "Ah... you remember?" he admitted with a quiet sigh. "Yes, I was indeed the otter you saved yesterday." He confessed, his embarrassment palpable. "It was an accident. I thought I'd just transform briefly to calm myself down, not expecting you to actually..." He stuttered awkwardly.

It was a revelation beyond your wildest imagination—the typically stoic Chief Justice harboring such an adorable and unexpected secret. You couldn't help but chuckle softly to yourself. "It's fine; I only did what was right," you assured him. However, the proximity of his body atop yours was causing a different kind of fluster. "Um... Monsieur Neuvillette, do you need something to cover yourself?" You averted your gaze, your cheeks now sporting a deep blush, and it was then that you both realized the rather compromising position you were in.

With a light chuckle, Neuvillette acknowledged his state of undress, his own cheeks flushed. "Er... ah... y-yes, please," he replied, turning away to search for a cloth to preserve his modesty. Once found, he hastily draped it over himself, providing a semblance of cover. He let out a sigh of relief, rubbing the back of his neck, his nervousness still evident. "Ahem... th-thank you."

It became apparent that Monsieur Neuvillette had no immediate intention of returning to the Court of Fontaine. "You're welcome to stay here a bit longer until your injuries heal," you offered, extending a welcoming smile.

Neuvillette's expression softened, a small smile gracing his lips. "If it's alright with you… I'd like to stay a while longer to finish recovering, that is" he admitted, his tone still somewhat awkward. The allure of your tranquil campsite seemed to be drawing him in, despite his official duties.

You patted the makeshift bed, inviting him to join you, and Neuvillette accepted the gesture, his body sinking into the mattress. He smiled, letting out another sigh of relaxation as he gazed up at the sky. "It's remarkably peaceful here," Neuvillette remarked. "Much better than my office at the Court of Fontaine." He sighed deeply, a sense of calm enveloping him. Your proximity offered a sense of peace that contrasted starkly with his usual courtroom environment.

As you scooted closer to him and wrapped your arms around him, Neuvillette's heart raced with a strange mix of emotions. He felt both comforted and unsettled, unable to fully comprehend the feelings that had arisen within him. His eyes met the serene horizon, and he sighed, trying to make sense of it all.

"It's hard to believe that even in your non-otter form, you're still quite adorable, Monsieur Neuvillette," you whispered, closing your eyes and drifting back to sleep.

Neuvillette blushed once more, his heart pounding in his chest as he lay beside you. The warmth of your embrace filled him with both comfort and a newfound sense of vulnerability. He allowed himself to enjoy the moment, not fully comprehending the depth of his feelings. As he closed his eyes and drifted into slumber once more, he couldn't help but wonder what the future held for this unexpected connection.

[wanderersbell]

wanderer x reader

summary: sometimes, when he thinks you aren’t looking, he makes his vision glow and dim softly in a steady rhythm. the illusion of a heartbeat.

genre: fluff

warnings: none

word count: 1,175

a/n: hellooo first time posting i am terrified of my writing being percieved but i’m full sending it and might never do this again so slay ig. scara is kinda ooc (he is not being a jerk lmao)

sometimes, when he thinks you aren’t looking, he makes his vision glow and dim softly in a steady rhythm. the illusion of a heartbeat. 

it’s one of the many things you’ve noticed he does in the time that’s passed since you met him. he’s complex, stubborn, hard to read, prone to outbursts, and yet it’s the small actions and glimpses of vulnerability that remind you how truly human he is. no matter his origins, what his body may be made out of, or how many lies have poisoned his consciousness, he feels everything the way a human does. 

you don’t get to see it often, whenever he knows you’re looking he makes a huge show of being a brat and flaunting an arrogance that seemingly never left him after his loss of divinity that he knows irks you to no end when you just want a solid answer out of him, but there are times he isn’t aware he’s being perceived. 

you have a tendency to become so absorbed in a task that you lose all situational awareness and he knows this well by now, choosing those moments to let his guard down while you don’t pay him any mind. he’s shown you a side of himself that’s remained previously undiscovered until he grew undeniably fond of you over time. he shows this in the way he bounces his leg when you’re hurt or not feeling well, the way he disappears off to sumeru city when you claim that nothing sounds good to eat only to return with the pita pockets he knows you’ll eat no matter what, in the way he lets you stroke and place featherlight kisses against his knuckles when he wakes up from a nightmare and looks down at his hands that have done so many cruel things and calls himself a monster. 

that last one has only happened twice thus far, and he always refuses to meet your eyes for a while the next morning, but his tolerance for your small shows of affection and comfort are welcome progress in comparison to the offense he used to take from it when he only saw it as pity. after all, he hates being looked down on. however, actions often speak better than words. 

you know he doesn’t understand why you seem to care for him, and you know that it’ll take time for him to fully open up, which is why you make sure to give him the moments you’re occupied with other things to unmask and decompress and never interrupt him when you accidentally tune back into reality, but it’s only a matter of time before you give yourself away. 

and now, while you watch him from where you sit at the bank untangling a fishing net, you think this might be the day you finally do. 

he’s standing a short distance away under the shade of a tree where he was initially scrutinizing your work and making snarky comments about it that fell on deaf ears as you paid him no mind, but had at some point fallen silent and let his tense shoulders drop as he watched the wildlife around him. 

the dappled sunlight through the leaves above him dance along the top of his hat with the movement of the wind and soft metal chimes can be heard as the ornaments on his hat sway with it, but it’s the soft sound of elemental energy that had taken your focus away from the net and when your attention fell on him, he was doing it again, making his vision beat lightly against his chest. the sight makes your heart clench and a lump form in your throat, watching him gaze so softly down at the item hanging down from his shoulder. he holds his right hand underneath it gently, almost as if even the slightest of touches would throw off the rhythm, and it’s in this moment that you release a sigh a bit too loud that has his eyes snapping to yours in an instant. 

for a moment he looks like a child that got caught stealing sweets, eyes wide and body frozen in place, before he eventually frowns and sends you a sharp glare while turning his body away from you and crossing his arms with a huff, pretending to go back to staring off into the distance. 

your feet start carrying you to him before your mind can even process the movement but he keeps himself faced away from you until you move in front of him. he looks unsure and hesitant, but there is an undeniable level of trust that had built up between you two that kept him from growing instinctively defensive. 

“what?” he demands, refusing to meet your eyes. 

“do it again.” 

when his gaze finally lands on you he looks almost taken aback. “why?”

you shake your head. “just do it, please.”

he looks like he wants to argue, but decides to keep his mouth shut and lets his arms fall back down to his sides in defeat when he realizes you’re dead serious. slowly, almost shyly, his vision starts glowing with anemo energy again, steady and strong. when you reach your hand up softly to touch it he tenses up and almost backs away, but after a reassuring glance from you holds himself in place and nervously waits to see what you’re trying to do. 

you lean closer as your fingertips make contact with the metal casing around it, feeling the rush of energy against your hand every time it brights and dims again. you might be imagining it, but the rhythm seems to pick up the closer you get. 

when your warm lips meet the cool glass against his chest, it reacts immediately; the elemental energy starts pulsating faster and faster inside of the vision while the wanderer stiffens before you, entirely frozen on the spot as his ‘heart’ beats wildly at your boldness. his expression remains almost entirely neutral, so much so that you probably wouldn’t have been able to tell he was even flustered had his vision not given it away, and the thought makes you smile softly knowing he can’t hide how these small shows of affection get to him now. the flush rising in his cheeks is proof of the fact that he’s more than aware of this, and he wastes no time shoving you away and yanking his hat down to cover his face while he turns away in embarrassment. 

instead of saying anything, you clasp your hands behind your back and return to the riverside where you left the tangled net, and you can literally feel the way his eyes are burning holes into the back of your head when you pick it up and start picking at the knots again. 

what you don’t see is the way he stares at you with pure wonder and adoration spilling over in his indigo irises, hand resting over the place your lips had just been as if he can hold the feeling there forever.

[gaybatmanenthusiast]

heeey, can i req arthur morgan

THE ARTIST, AND THE OUTLAW (oneshot)

(ARTHUR MORGAN X GN! READER)

⋆★ word count : 1,112

⋆★ warnings : n/a

⋆★ summary : arthur meets the reader sketching the landscape, intrigued by their talent and he approaches them, asking for a portrait of someone important to him.

⋆★ extra : wrote this with a friend in mind once again, praying shes the one that requested this orrr someone has been waiting for their request for a hot minute …

Arthur hadn’t expected to see anyone out here, let alone someone so intently focused on sketching the open plains. He paused, just watching for a moment, leaning against his horse as the sun dipped low over the distant hills, casting warm light across the land and across the lone figure on the ledge.

The artist—a stranger whose name he didn’t know—hadn’t noticed him yet. They were too absorbed in capturing the scene before them, their hand working swiftly over a sketchbook balanced on their knee. From his distance, Arthur could barely make out their features, but he didn’t need to. It was the energy in their movements, the quiet reverence in how they observed the landscape, that held his attention.

Finally, he cleared his throat and took a few steps closer, boots scuffing over the dry earth. “Hope I ain’t interruptin’ anything important,” he called, voice rough but softened by curiosity.

They looked up, blinking in surprise, though they didn’t seem startled. Instead, they offered a slight smile, as if strangers showing up in the middle of nowhere was just part of the day. “Not interrupting. Just trying to get the light right,” they replied, glancing back at the scene before them with a quiet determination.

Arthur nodded, a little more intrigued. “S’pose you come out here often?”

“Anywhere I can find something worth sketching,” they replied, holding up the book as if it answered everything. “There’s just… too much beauty out here to let it pass by unrecorded.”

Arthur studied their sketch from a distance. Though it was unfinished, he could already see the skill behind it—the way they captured shadows and the contours of the land with a precision that felt both raw and alive. The sight stirred something in him, an odd mixture of nostalgia and longing he hadn’t expected.

“Mind if I take a look?” he asked, nodding toward the book.

They hesitated only a moment, then passed it over. Arthur took it gently, scanning the pages. There were sketches of wildlife, mountain ranges, campfires, and even little moments—a flower caught in the breeze, a lone bird perched on a fence post. Each drawing held an attentiveness that felt almost sacred.

“You got a way with things,” he murmured, still focused on the pages. “Ain’t many folks out here would even notice half of what you put down.”

They shrugged, though there was a flicker of pride in their eyes. “Guess I like to see the world for what it is, not just what people want it to be.”

He nodded slowly, feeling the weight of their words settle in his mind. For a while, they sat in a comfortable silence, he by his horse, and they back to their sketching. Arthur watched, noting the way they glanced up every now and then, catching little details with an intensity he envied. It was as if they saw the world through a different lens, one that softened the rough edges he was so used to.

After a while, he found himself speaking up again. “You, uh… ever think about doin’ a portrait? You got the skill for it.”

They glanced over, brow raised in mild curiosity. “I’ve done a few, but it depends on the person.” Their eyes lingered on him, considering. “Why? Got someone in mind?”

Arthur shifted, uncertain for a moment. “Yeah… my ma, actually. She’s been gone a long time, but… you got a way of makin’ things feel alive.” He almost regretted the admission, but the words had come unbidden.

The artist’s expression softened, a gentle understanding in their gaze. “I’d be honoured,” they said quietly. “Tell me about her.”

He hesitated, caught off-guard by the tenderness in their tone. But as the words spilled out, he found himself recounting little things he hadn’t thought of in years—the sound of his mother’s laugh, the kindness in her eyes, the way she’d held him close when he was small and scared. The artist listened, not interrupting, letting him speak in his own time. And when he was finished, they simply nodded, already starting to sketch.

Over the following days, Arthur returned to the spot by the ledge, finding them there nearly every afternoon, waiting patiently with sketchbook in hand. With each meeting, they asked small questions, drawing more stories from him, little by little. He spoke about his ma, then his old life before the gang, and even the first time he’d ridden a horse on his own. Each story felt like an offering, as if he were putting pieces of himself down on paper through their hands.

As he spoke, he started asking about their life, too—where they’d come from, what had brought them to this place. They answered with quiet honesty, sharing tales of a life spent moving from place to place, driven not by restlessness but by a love for the land and the people within it. They talked about the way different skies looked at dawn, about quiet moments in bustling towns, about the simple peace that came from just sitting under an open sky.

Arthur began to see the world differently through them. The mountains seemed taller, the rivers gentler, and even the dusty roads they walked on felt more alive. For the first time, he wondered if there might be more to his own story than just the guns and blood he’d left in his wake.

One evening, as they were finishing up the day’s work, they turned to him, a small, contemplative smile on their lips. “Arthur… you ever think about what you’ll leave behind?”

He blinked, surprised. “Ain’t never thought much of it.”

“Well,” they said softly, looking down at the nearly completed portrait. “Even outlaws deserve to be remembered for more than just the dust they kick up.”

Their words struck a chord, one he hadn’t expected to feel. There was an ache in his chest, something that felt like hope, and it unsettled him. But as he looked at them, at the quiet sincerity in their gaze, he felt that maybe, just maybe, there was something worth holding onto.

They reached out, a light touch on his hand, fingers brushing his calloused knuckles. The gesture was simple, yet it felt electric, a silent promise that there was more to life than he’d known. He held their gaze, feeling the faint stirrings of something unfamiliar, something that felt like warmth and light all at once.

“Thank you,” he whispered, voice rough, barely audible. And in the quiet that followed, they just smiled, a hint of something fond and knowing in their expression—a look that told him they saw him, the real him, and they still cared.

[whoyacallinyellow]

Borrowed Time hurt me a lot omg- Now I offer you even more angst.

It's sad that Javier became the very thing in 1911 that he swore to destroy (working as a hitman for a tyrant government) but it would be even sadder if (as a part 2 ig of borrowed time) Javier and his love meet again but this time, he was there to arrest her and bring her to town to hang.

Borrowed Time II

Javier Escuella x F! reader

Spoilers: major RDR1-2 events Content: 18+, low honor Javier, angst, betrayal, loyalty, dramatic, possessive, referenced/implied sex, canon typical events & violence, possible unintentional spelling mistakes, google translated Spanish Type: I-II changed to second pov (wc - 4133) / pc: pinterest a/n: i can feel this request in my veins, so here’s my mediocre yapping! live, laugh, angst 

Summary: Following the events of Beaver Hollow and your departure, Javier falls into work with Allende. After your reunion he reflects on his time with you, to only turn you in by nightfall. 

It was a warm day in New Austin, the orange rays blanketing the barren dirt landscape, and not a cloud in the sky. Javier only imagined finding himself wandering these lands again, but yet he returned on what seemed to be borrowed time.

A few years had passed since he last saw you at Beaver Hollow. The man could not bear to show his face, the embarrassment of being wrong about Dutch was an ego check it say the very least. 

Yet your note lived in the far corner of his mind, a small cabin just north of MacFarlane's Ranch from his understanding. 

It did not take the man long to find it, local cowpokes cowered at the sight of the large Mexican outlaw sitting upon an even larger steed, interrogating them about a maiden. It was almost as if the best pieces of you resembled him, immediately reminding the folk of who it was he was searching for. 

Boaz grunted against Javier’s spurs, digging deep into the loose red dirt below. The sunbeams which crept through the dry pine trees created quite the atmosphere, allowing Javier to get lost in his head, even if it were just for a few moments of bliss. 

Despite the directions given to him, Javier hoped you had moved on after all these years, fled somewhere safer, started a new life, perhaps changed your name as well. Somewhere he would never find you. 

Boaz continued to race down the winding path, feeding Javier’s anticipation against the warm breeze. As it gusted past the side of his head, loose strands from his tied hair tickled his ears, merely reminding the man how badly he needed a haircut. 

The starving grass which bordered West Elizabeth held a yellow tinge, the land rolled and waved, flourishing with birds and wildlife. Javier reckoned he has not been to the area before, but you were not lying about how appealing it was— a perfect home for you two. 

Upon whipping around the corner, abruptly revealed a small cabin with songbirds singing to him in the trees. The place was quiet, cozy, and seemingly inhabited, with small smoke stacks exhausting from the brick chimney. 

Bringing Boaz to a halt, there was no sign of you— but sure enough a big black cloud skulked in the nearby pen, following you wherever you wandered like a burden. 

Javier stiffly slid off Boaz, his knees nearly giving out from under him as his boots crunched onto the dirt. The beast was grazing on hay as he approached the fence post 

After whistling and calling your shire a few times, Javier was promptly ignored, perhaps the slow and ominous brute heard the man call him el diablo one too many times. 

He was still a strong believer the only reason the horse broke for you was out of pity— you looked like a child struggling to climb him every endeavor. Maybe the beast had a soft spot for you, just like himself. 

But now the old shire was relieved from his saddle, serenading in the New Austin sun, not bothered to obey the envious man’s command. 

Javier leaned against the corral post, admiring what he could have had with you, the thought of being a family man loomed over his shoulders and displayed no signs of leaving. 

You and Javier ran together prior to joining Dutch, less for money and more for survival. Your past crimes covered bounty boards and train stations as a permanent reminder, never forgetting the wrongs that were written. That price only increased once Mexico inevitably caught wind of all the messy jobs in neighboring lands. 

He drowned and you sank with him, the price of his sins were bricks added to your back. Being his accessory, the government saw you as a pawn, smart and knowledgeable, if caught— Javier would come for you, and they would be ready for him. 

Those days were nearly from another lifetime. 

Now under Allende’s ruling fist, he offered him a twisted plea deal of sorts; protection at the cost of something the man held more dearly than life itself—you. Your capture was not about the money nor status, but simply a test of his loyalty to Allende; if Javier did this job, he’d do anything. 

The poor man’s convoluted loyalty never got him far, proving time and time again, leading him only to dead ends and false hopes. Charismatic attributes and big promises was something Javier foolishly gave everything to with a blind eye, something you always warned him about.  

“Javier?—“ 

Your voice could have made him leap out of his own skin. As he hesitantly turned towards you, his gut twisted into something mean. You were beautiful as ever, after all these years you waited for him— just like you promised. 

“Never thought I’d see you again, especially in the west.” You spoke again in disbelief, rag wiping your hands clean of a job he should have been doing. 

Your voice only lived in his memories, hearing it again nearly whipped Javier back into shape, feeling sick for your puppy love he desperately relied on so long ago. 

“Home sweet home.” The man swallowed dryly, throwing his arms out awkwardly and gesturing towards the open lands around you both. 

Before his thoughts could catch up to the moment, you ran to embrace him, flinging yourself into his arms with a long awaited kiss. Javier grunted softly against your lips, staggering back to support you, the extra attention only reminding him how saddle sore he really was.  

Just for a moment things felt normal, a feeling he was searching for since you split. He had a place in this cruel world once again, everywhere had a price on his head, no place to retreat to besides you— you were home. 

Perhaps he could head tail between his legs back to Allende, saying you disappeared. 

Maybe he could take you to Canada, or a tropical island— oh, anywhere but Guarma. 

We must leave,

Javier’s unsaid words pricked beneath his skin, prodding relentlessly at his deepest desires for redemption. 

“Oh—amor.” 

Was all the man could choke out, the words exiting pitiful and weak, a near cry for help you assumed was just your bittersweet reunion. 

Leaning away you smiled coyly at him, admiring your lost cowboy;

Your time apart was not easy on Javier, his hardened stare and the chip on his shoulder now set in stone. 

The constant blazing sun of Mexico, along with surviving off rationed canned beans really took a toll on the man. His face was dull and lacking the usual pigment he wore so handsomely when Mr. Pearson cooked for everyone. 

Javier’s newfound demeanor only put emphasis on his sharp brows peeking from under his bowler cap brim, residing above dark cunning eyes, ready to match any cowpuncher who dared challenge him. 

Over Javier’s shoulder was where his mount rested, hoove digging into the dirt at the end of the cabin’s path. 

“—and Boaz?” You began after a shared silence, slowly approaching the overworked horse. 

“Still kickin’.” He uttered gently, a large hand scratching the back of his neck. 

Boaz never really liked you, or anyone besides Javier that is. It wasn’t until the gang hunkered down in Colter for the stubborn bastard to take a liking to you. 

The weather and unpredictable circumstances was not easy on the gang, including the horses, causing rations to be small among the mounts. 

You always carried treats in your satchel to gain Boaz’s affection, and your efforts would eventually succeed in Colter. You would secretly slip him sugar cubes every time you left the shack, he must have appreciated the extra attention. Javier barely recognized Boaz trotting up to him in the snow, you mounted on top wearing a proud grin. 

You wore a similar grin now, full of satisfaction and pride that he returned to you— with warmth flowing through him, his heart rapidly thumped in his ears, all the pent up feelings for you were reopening like floodgates. 

“What’a nice feller, huh.” You cooed to the mount after a slow approach. 

Showing no distress Boaz allowed your kind pats and rubs. Tenderly nudging you, the horse’s chops tried sneaking its way into your pockets, searching for the snacks you usually held after a long journey. 

“Ai, fácil!” 

Javier exclaimed, quickly guiding Boaz’s large snout away, the loving gestures nearly toppling you over. 

“Guess I’m glad he still remembers me.” You beamed, tipping your hat lower to shield yourself from the beating sun. 

“Or perhaps your donations, amor.” Javier quipped softly, his eyes wandering meekly. 

Something besides time passing seemed different about him, you could not quite pinpoint it. Javier was always a timid man at first when it came to his lover, maybe your time apart presented this old side of him. 

You knelt slightly, peeking under his sunken head which hung towards the ground. 

“Javier? You don’t look so good.” 

Your soft words managed to dig their way through his ringing ears, the man squinted his eyes tightly before swiping his lids with rough fingers. 

“Uh— maybe you oughta sit for a bit, I think you’re overdressed for this heat.” 

Your words broke through once again, giving a small tug on his poncho, his disoriented vision cluttered with black floating spots as you guided towards the porch. 

As his vision continued to warp, the cabin doubled and skewed while you put him in the shade. 

Javier knew you were speaking, your voice fading in and out irreguarly, piercing his ears every so often. 

The words felt like they were being consumed by the ocean, his head bobbed up and down as if he were drowning. All he could think about was Dutch’s screams over the storm and waves, as he was about to be consumed by the large void. 

But Dutch snagged him before being swept away, yanking him upon the tiny rowboat that threatened to tip from the added stress. Javier’s senses were waterlogged, rejecting the mean salty water from his lungs. As he gasped for air; the only thing he thought of was you. 

“S’alright, son, You’re not dying today!” Was the first thing he heard. He faded in and out of consciousness as Dutch beat the sea water out of him, his ribcage rattling under each and every smack. 

Javier sometimes wonders if Dutch should have just let him die, abandon him and allow the dark waters to engulf him whole, repaying his sins to his maker. Maybe his death would free you of your burdens. 

He felt like his time had withered before Dutch had saved him anyways. Being a prisoner in Guarma is what convinced him that he would never make it back to you, sealing the deal. Your previous words borrowed time scratched at his skin again, yearning to be acknowledged. 

“Ah well, I knew you’d come crawling back, you’re here for a reason.” You would always say to him after a particularly dangerous run with the gang. He would dismiss you with a mumble and a kiss, but always knew he was lucky to be alive as more of his brothers began to fall. 

Sometimes he would catch you talking to a disgruntled Arthur as he packed his horse. 

Upon inquiring about your words, Arthur being a somewhat vague man would shortly grumble; 

“Jus’ focus on the job, and returnin’ to your woman, Javier.” 

—and he always did. Javier knew you did not worry about him much, at least outwardly. But he did notice Arthur’s presence whenever trouble presented itself. 

~

“Javier— some water.” 

Your words along with a canteen dangled in front of him, the prior hallucination of a watery grave was almost enough to empty his stomach. 

Javier stared back towards your shire lounging in his corral, his mind once again wandering back to the life he could have had with you. 

In the midst of his tunneling vision, a lean coyote lingered through his gaze, stalking towards him, icy eyes sending daggers into his before diminishing. 

“Javier. Say something.” Your words were now much clearer to him, breaking through his consciousness, the ringing disappeared from his mind fog. 

“‘M alright.” He muttered, spitting out the bitter taste from his mouth. 

“I reckon you oughta take it easy, being an old man n’ all now.”

Javier frowned at you and blinked a couple times, jaw agape, processing the pun you made at his dismay. 

“Ha— so sorry, chica, ‘suppose I’m no longer the young buck you remember.” 

He replied sarcastically, his voice both bold and hoarse as he raised back to his feet, every step whining for rest. 

“Ride with me?” Javier suddenly asked as if nothing happened. It took you by surprise, he had just arrived after all. 

“Alright.” You obliged shortly after a pause. “Let me grab my belt.” You continued, motioning towards the missing holsters on your frame. 

“No need.” He cut you off quickly, his voice leaving traces of urgency. 

“Boaz is packed.” 

You eyed him up, watching the man shutter under your antagonizing gaze, how he hoped you were not suspicious of his intentions after all this time. But rightfully so, the man was yellow-bellied. 

But you had no reason not to trust him. 

You were not exactly sure where Javier was taking you, but for now his company was enough to keep you satisfied. The ride was eerily quiet, even for his standards, being a man of few words. 

After riding a little down south he brought you to a small mountain that overlooked Mexico. He perched you both on a small flat area, just in time for the sun to sink below the land. 

Javier stared over the horizon, he never really did think about how big the south was, yet how small he felt in comparison. A glimmer caught onto his peripheral, turning towards the shine was the pendent he had given you, when you both first started running with the gang. 

The feeling presented itself again, feeling so small in the world— you were the home he had been searching for since the gang's fallout. It was always you. 

He sank into his memories, a vessel of his former self was all that remained. 

You two were quite away from your newly shared camp, with all the members and leads, the moments you had alone became quite sparse. 

“What do you think, Javi?” Your sudden presence caught him off guard. 

“The gang?—“ he pondered your words, leaning against a shady oak. 

“I suppose they’re family for now, señorita. We’re much safer, and they’re good to us.” Javier replied, a hand brushing over the stubble on his jaw. You smiled gently with a nod, making your uneasiness all too obvious. 

“It’s just temporary, amor, once we have the money to get on our feet— it’ll be the two of us again.” He reassured, a polite arm sliding around your waist. 

Javier remembers the look in your eye, doubtful and full of sorrow, but you still trusted him, knowing he would never lead you astray. The same he thought about Dutch.  

Repositioning himself behind you, he dug a necklace from his pocket, draping it over your chest and clasping it. You fidgeted in surprise against his movements, gazing down at the beautiful silver pendant that glistened off the very same sun. Before you could say a word he planted a kiss on your lips, gentle and quick before mounting Boaz. 

“I promise!” 

He called out. After blowing a kiss to you, he was off to assist the gang. He didn’t have much money at the time, but Javier always knew how to make things work—

Oh how naive of him— bright eyed and lovesick, he wanted to make a woman out of you, settle down. That is, before Dutch’s plan captivated him. Which ultimately led to this mess, but who is he kidding, he never really had a chance anyways. 

Javier thought back with immense regret, wishing he was more romantic with you in a way, officially making you his chica earlier on, instead of prolonging it due to the possibility of death. He always feared that courting would further your heartbreak if something bad were to happen. 

It was his own unaddressed way to cope with the harsh reality of survival and being an outlaw, he always prioritized your safety over intimacy until joining the gang. When he looks back on it, your shared time at Horseshoe Overlook and Clemons Point were some of the best times of his life. 

Around that time of riding with the gang was when your relationship with him really began to evolve. The potential competition of other men drove Javier and his intimacy up a wall— his usual gentle lips ghosting over yours turned into small nips, and purple blotches he would mark on your neck late at night. A tight palm covering your mouth which muffled the moans of his name, words the man would kill to hear in such an uncaged manner. He entertained no confusion of who you belonged to; even if he did not make things official until that night at the lake.  

Javier had nearly forgotten the sun had already set, and he somehow had no recollection of it. He looked down at you, only in a thin shirt as you gazed longingly off the mountain side.

The final sunset you shared was simply a ticking clock for him. 

“Cold?” He whispered, words he could barely choke out. 

“A little.” You replied, big doe-like eyes staring up at him, holding so much love for the man. Love he was not sure he ever deserved. 

Forcing his gaze away quickly he arose, soles of his feet vibrating and pulsing with each step. After approaching Boaz his shaking hands freed his bedroll clasps, attention locked upon his rifle poking out of the saddle. 

His head spun, finally digging himself out of his trance. After returning to you, he draped the cloth over you coyly. 

“You okay?” You suddenly asked, your hush voice startling him, he sighed in despair. 

The words you said to him at Beaver Hollow replayed through his mind,

Leave with me. Let’s run away. 

But he could not get them out, his chest quivered under the constraint of his uneven breaths. 

“Course.” He managed to form the word, you nodded in contentment, fresh air filling your nose. 

His response would have to do for now, you decided to cut him some slack since he returned to you, after all. 

By now you knew him well enough. Some nights he would stay up and collect his thoughts before laying beside you. You always respected his space, he had his demons, like everyone else. Soon enough in your slumber  you would feel his protective arms drape around you, his steady breaths hitting the nape of your neck, tense body encapsulating yours— those were the nights you felt the safest, and knew he was going to manage just fine. 

Other nights Javier would stay up while you were by your lonesome. He always feared something would kill the both of you while asleep, reluctantly you agreed. But the man always let you rest, you needed it more, that is for putting up with him all day round. 

Your memories swam with always being coaxed to sleep, eventually giving into the soft lulls he would sing. A wordless agreement that there was no point for the both of you to be cranky and tired in the morning. 

—But there he sat, only to turn into the monster he swore to protect you from. 

“I love you, Javier.” 

Your words racked his brain, digging and clawing invasively into each one of his bones. Javier thought he imagined them until he looked over to find you staring this entire time. You knew there was something seriously wrong, but surely he would tell you within due time. 

Javier’s voice was lost, swallowing suppressed sobs down his dry throat, he nearly felt like he was drowning once again in the frame he called a body. 

Just like the days he would not say it back while pursuing a lead, with doubts he would not make it back to your arms— but he always did, it was the least he could do. It felt like lifetimes ago to him, how could the man choke out a te amo before sending you in? 

Instead, he planted a kiss on your soft lips, lingering there for a moment, knowing it would be your last. 

Looming below in the shadows, trailing to the border resided monsters he used to protect you from— two Mexican soldiers camped out by the tracks. Their lanterns flickering softly in the distance, patiently waiting for the man to arrive at the agreed meeting spot. 

Javier shivered, feeling like a young boy again. His eyes fixated on the stock of his rifle that Boaz held. 

Your breaths became shallow, harmonizing with the warm night’s breeze as you fell into a slumber. You trusted Javier’s judgment on setting up camp or heading home, you perhaps allowed yourself to get a little too comfortable. 

It all happened so fast for him, and there was no going back. Javier’s mind blurred as he rode, Boaz fussing and fighting under his control. His very own horse feared the  monster he had become, maybe poor Boaz thought he was Javier’s next victim. 

He rode fast— but not fast enough to flee from himself. 

A coyote lurked around the darkness, gazing at Javier from behind the two Mexican soldiers who taunted him, puffing on their big cigars from Uncle Sam.  

The coyote disappeared as Javier reached for his revolver, patiently waiting for the man to shoot him— but he never did. 

The soldier simply laughed, knowing Javier’s bark had no bite. While under Allende’s power, he was simply a coward a soldier would not even match out of pity.  

Soon enough the two men fled into the night, banter that could be heard a mile away through the ravines. Anyone could have mistaken them for sick hyenas. 

He could hear their stallions riding hard in triumph, with a new prize Javier held so close for many years, he watched the soldiers grow smaller and smaller over the uneven land until the darkness swallowed them whole, taking a piece of him along. 

The nighttimes ahead would find Javier in a one horse town saloon, nodding off more times than he could remember. His glass turned from full to empty until his vision doubled. 

Javier was not sure how many days had passed, the whiskey dulling his mind and senses, but the thoughts still ate him alive. 

Did you think he would come for you? Or would you be envious, spilling everything you could before meeting the gallows. 

Javier hid in his palms, knowing he got it all wrong— it should have been him. 

It did not take too long for the man to get kicked out from the saloon due to his drunken stupor, not even the bartender wanted his dirty money. 

Javier took Boaz to what he thought was east, the coyote returned to accompany him, lurking around on the monotone forest floors he traveled. 

The night breeze made Javier reminisce of the times at camp, the very same breeze that whipped through your hair as you would drag him off somewhere secluded, your mischievous grin reflecting off the summer night's moon as you snuck off into the bushes. 

You gave everything to each other— all for nothing it seems.

Javier sank lower into himself before eventually staggering off Boaz. It only took him a few unsteady steps to empty his bowels on the dirt path, elbows hoisting him up on his shaky bent knees. 

Peeking out from his jacket cuff was a scar he once wore proudly on his wrist. A scar he earned in some honky tonk town just because another man looked at you wrong. The mere thought of it worsened his nausea.  

All signs pointed to you, and you were gone because of reasons he barely understood himself— He feared he didn’t know what loyalty was anymore. Or what he stood for in fact. 

Your blind love killed you in the end, and it was his cross to bear. 

The sky was dark and dull, which was just as familiar as a bottle and a glass. Not a single star in the sky greeted him, leaving him to fester alone. 

The wind howled violently through the trees, causing the leaves to rustle and sway. A northern was quickly sneaking upon the lands of New Austin. 

His lone coyote joined him on a distant cliffside, coat black as sin, mocking the cowboy who lingered below. 

~