#why would someone make me want to cry this much

[vintagepresley]

I’m almost done with it. I’ll be honest.. I only read this book because Cooper Koch loves this book and way how beautiful it is and he may be playing Jude if they actually decide to make a movie about it which I heard is possibly happening. So I’m like hmmm he keeps talking about this book and the cover caught my eye. I did a little research on it and saw a lot… ALOT of people hated it. But I just took that as people on TikTok being dramatic as always.

This book is so traumatic, tragic, painful, sad and had my emotions everywhere. I’ve never cried so much reading a book. Then I decided to see what everyone thought of it on TikTok and just doing research. I’m seeing everyone call it trauma porn and all these other things. I’ll be honest. Would I classify this book as beautiful? No. Do I understand why people describe it that way? Definitely. But it’s not beautiful to me. It’s just heartbreaking. It’s a wonderfully written book and the story and how it’s told is phenomenal. But it’s so tragic that I can’t define it as beautiful. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it or the characters. Thinking about it makes me cry.

But I don’t hate it? I think the reason why is because there are so many people out there going through what Jude had experienced and what he was experiencing with the aftermath of those things in his adulthood. Now I’m not saying these exact scenarios are happening to people. But these things do happen. The child prostitution, the child sexual abuse, physical abuse. Rape. How people deal with it, I feel sometimes is similar to how Jude was dealing with it. Refusing to see a therapist, the cutting, thinking he’s not good enough or doesn’t deserve love because he thinks he’s disgusting or that people think he is. Not being able to open up because of the fear of people seeing you differently. His difficulties with sex and his relationships with the people around him. All of that I think is what made me emotional because all I could think about is the people out there who are or who have been through this. Then myself being a victim of sexual abuse.

I think that’s what made it hard for me to hate it. Because once I saw everyone hating it.. I’m like why? This is stuff that’s happening to people. Stuff that people are dealing with and we don’t even know it because some people are afraid to talk about it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t understand why people DO hate it. It’s fucking wild to write as a book. Like who the fuck thinks of shit like this??? I also don’t agree with the authors opinions about how someone as traumatized as Jude should kill themselves and how she doesn’t really believe in therapy. That I think is the most ridiculous thing I heard. Therapy works if you allow it to work and you allow yourself to be open and vulnerable. Suicide doesn’t need to be the answer and a lot of times therapy has saved someone’s life. So the author I don’t really like. Cause girl what… I also don’t agree with this becoming a movie. No one wants to see this on film, it’s hard enough reading about it. I love Cooper Koch and I think he’d make a great Jude especially after seeing him as Erik Menendez. But I don’t want a movie about this book. WE DONT NEED THAT.

[tswkento]

a.n.: cry by cas is from gojo’s pov and bored by billie eilish is from reader’s pov. literally crying, don’t thank me.

gojo who desperately wants to return your feelings, but he just can’t.

whose heart tightens painfully every time he is reminded of the fact that you have very strong feelings for him and he doesn’t have the same feelings for you.

every single time you look at him there are fucking stars in your eyes, as if he is the one who discovered the universe and earth, who made the world a place to live, and it hurts his soul to see you craving something he can’t give you.

maybe you didn’t really want to fall in love with him in the first place; maybe it was just a subconscious decision to use him as someone you could pour your love into since he was one of the few from who stayed in the shitshow that was the whole jujutsu society.

there was no geto, who could accept your love as a given, there was no haibara who’d preen under your attention, there was no nanami who’d give you the same love tenfold.

it was just his very flawed self that you chose to love.

gojo tries to find something that could ignite the spark in him and make him the lovesick fool that you need, but there is nothing that burns inside of him other than a hope for a better future. and you aren’t the issue either, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, never was and never will be.

you’re an angel sent from above and not everyone knows your worth; your bright smiles, your never ending belief in the better things, your strong will and your admirable character — you’re the embodiment of perfection, yet satoru can’t find it in himself to fall under your charms and he thinks there is a lot fucking wrong with him.

there is this beautiful person, you, ready to accept him with open arms and hold him close until the end, and satoru is so fucking helpless, he doesn’t even understand why would anyone harbour such feelings for him. the sound of word “love” is like a punch in the gut, something gojo avoided thinking about his whole life because there was no point of loving someone for him. he knows he will only ever have himself in the end.

he will hurt the person close to him and be alone forever. that’s what he thinks.

at some point, satoru tries to have something with you in hopes of falling for you too. because you’re pretty likeable and very cute in your own way, and he’d be blind to not see that.

he starts reciprocating your fleeting touches, puts a little more charm into his smile and accepts your affections as much as he can, and the passionate glint in your eyes would be the best reward if guilt didn’t start eating him from the inside as soon as he started this whole thing. your toothy smiles and warm touches would be the best thing if only gojo knew how to fall in love with you.

your kisses feel impossibly good but they don’t belong on his lips and he claims them unfairly, like he deserves them. his hesitation is concealed by his desire to make you happy even though the voice inside his head is screaming at him to fucking stop this act and pull away and apologise for being the biggest asshole in the universe, yet he doesn’t stop.

he selfishly relishes in the feeling of your warm body pressing against his, the softness if your skin and the wanton moans you let out at the slightest touch he plants on you — your eyes full of yearning, longing for him and his presence, and satoru’s mind becomes foggy with need to feel someone, something. something strong, something powerful that will certainly shake him to his core. he has to love you.

but he can’t. and it’s too much for him to keep inside so he ends everything the next day.

and you don’t cry. your eyes turn hollow and satoru never sees you again.

[thatnonameuser]

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I just read the Azul thought and I totally agree!! It makes me excited to see his breaking point when his contracts are all destroyed!!! AH!! (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠) Can't wait to see him crying and sobbing because all his hard work turned to dust, that he's once more proven to be a pathetic yandere. Outclassed by some like Leona that even MC [A darling!] chose to live and work with Leona more than him. [and on that note: I can also imagine that this memory will make Azul more spiteful with Leona post-ob.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And speaking of Leona!! I also had a thought. Did you know that in the original Lion King, Scar liked Simba's mom? And one of the reasons he killed Mufasa was to have her when he becomes king. I was wondering if you're going to incorporate that? That Leona once thought of Cheka's mom as his darling, and when his brother took her away [Like he took everything else from him] Leona was filled with hatred; In a Leona-centered event, Leona was said to have done everything in his power to prove that he too should have a claim to the throne and that he was better than his brother, only to give up once his brother's reign became secure after producing Cheka. I would imagine yan-au Leona to try and fight his brother for darling, only to lose. And he'd keep fighting, of course, he's nothing but tenacious. Only to have his spirits crushed when it's announced that she's pregnant. [Which you said is an ultimate claim of the darling?]

He went to school late because of that and he stayed there because he didn't like going home [Probably gets sour every time he catches sight of Cheka.] And you said that yanderes can find out that they can mistake a darling to be theirs until they meet "The true one". So will MC be a victim of this "True Darling" schtick? I imagine this can fuel Leona's possessive tendencies. He's already lost once. I doubt he'd want to lose again. [I also imagine he'd be pissed at Riddle and everyone else during his OB, cause they specifically kept MC away as he was "too dangerous"] just a thought dump, hope this is okay?

Don’t worry! It was perfectly okay!!

Azul’s going to want to kill Leona. 

After finding out Leona, a strong yandere, sent him back to being a pathetic, useless yandere again with just a little magic is destroying him. And when he finds out you worked with him (you hate him, you think he’s too weak so you chose someone stronger because he’s too pathetic-) well, that’ll just destroy him. When he finds out that you slept in Leona’s bed because of your deal. Knowing that you were wrapped in that beast’s arms for three nights makes his cold blood boil that much hotter.

(Side note - Chad Leona stealing Beta Azul’s girl was a hilarious idea I came up with as I was writing this. I thought I’d share it.)

He wants to skin that lion alive. But if you come to him for any help in getting away from the lion, he’ll do it without a second thought, anything he can do to draw you to him and away from that lazy, oversized house cat.

*                        *                        *                        *

But let’s move back to Leona. But before that, Scar. 

I actually did know that Scar liked Sarabi, that’s the name of Simba’s mom, which is why I’ve made her his darling.  Scar says in the Lion King that Mufasa was always stronger than him, so maybe Scar tried to fight for the throne and Sarabi’s hand and failed. And because of that it’s one of the reasons he kills his brother and tries to kill Simba, because he wants to get rid of every reminder that he didn’t win her hand originally. 

Now back to Leona, he is similar. He originally assumed Falena’s wife, then fiance, to be his darling back when his brother brought her home. She was beautiful, smart and sly. She wasn’t some useless basic princess, she was clever and snarky, noble and strong. Back then, he confused her for his darling. And for good reason, back then he once saw her as perfect. 

But as soon as he saw the bite mark on the back of her neck, the love at first sight dissolved into jealous fury. Of course, his brother would try to take everything he ever wanted away from him before he could even try to get it. Like he always did. 

Watching him wrap his arm around her, kiss her, and touch her made that jealous burn all the brighter. He obviously tried to fight his brother for her, but while he was given the brains in the family, his brother got the brute strength and he lost. Whenever he tried again, he lost again. He even hoped his brother would fail in the rituals needed for him to marry her, but once again the brute found success. 

And then they got married, and then she got pregnant, and after that Cheka was born. And that little ankle biter wouldn’t leave him alone, permanently reminding him about his loss. Going home drilled that agonising reminder into his heart. 

But then, he met you.

There’s a saying that if you confuse someone else as your darling, their traits will be similar to your true darling. And you are all those things.

He knew you were his as soon as he breathed in your scent. And he was given his second chance to have his darling. His true one this time. But that’s what makes him so possessive. Fuelled by his animal instincts and past loss, he’s not going to risk losing you.

Regarding his rage at the others for keeping you away from him, he’s definitely pissed combined with the reminder of his other losses. The urge to dissolve them into sand particles for them keeping his darling away from him. 

Also……..

Seven forbid Leona finds out Malleus has been spending time with you. Seven forbid Leona finds out you’re also Malleus’ darling. Leona’s not dumb, as soon as he can get you he will. 

Better be smart, Herbivore~

[florenceafternoon]

━。゜✿ jily fic recommendations ✿ ゜。━

Thank you to all the authors who share their wonderful stories with us. I hope this list reminds you that I come back to these stories often and that your words are loved by many.

As always, these fics are set in the wizarding world but aren’t necessarily canon compliant.

For reference, anything in italics is taken from the summaries.

A Hundred Visions and Revisions by @yallthemwitches

She loves him like this: sleepy, slap happy, sometimes a bit handsy but willing to meet her where she’s at in the moment. It’s the quiet moments like this that keep her going sometimes, knowing that whatever is happening out there will disappear by the end of the day when they can hold each other again.

To live for the hope of it all

Whispers in the Dark also by yallthemwitches

When Lily is awarded her prefect badge in fifth year, they warn her that James Potter has a talent for disappearing... but if that's true, why does he keep coming to her night after night, hoping to be caught?

Until the Light Takes Us also by yallthemwitches

A series of drabbles and fics following the prompt of Jilytober Fest 2024.

color theory by @clare-with-no-i

Lily Evans learns about love: its hues, its tints, its shades. Some disappoint. Some dazzle.

falling (for fools) by @jjameslily

She hated him. Hated his confidence, his messy charm, the way he managed to take up space even when he wasn’t saying a word.

Absolutely. Totally. Without question.

But, as much as she tried to focus, she couldn’t shake the nagging thought.

She’d never noticed just how distracting James Potter could be.

don’t let it make you cry also by jjameslily

Her eyes glistened, the love within her radiating from her. She let it ripple outward, weaving her spirit into the air around him, reaching beyond the veil, hoping he—Harry, their son—would feel it not as a ghost of a fleeting memory, but as a pulse. Alive. Real.

Quid Pro Quo by StarsAndDiamond (on ao3)

Lily Evans was not ready to go home for her sister's Christmas engagement, but she wasn't the only one up late at night in the common room.

Sharper Than Hope by @maraudersftw

“You’re…” A lick of lips; something sharper than hope on my tongue; another attempt. “You fancy me?”

every single time by @gigglesandfreckles-hp

Unrelated drabbles, fics, ficlets, and word dumps in response to jilytober 2024 prompts

2, 5, 10, 11, 12, 16, 19, 21, 27, 29 and 30 are my favourites

Lucky Number 7 by zipadeea (on ao3)

Lily Evans thought life at Hogwarts was busy enough for her, what with Prefect duties and N.E.W.T classes and meetings with the Slug Club. Then, Marlene convinces her to try out for the Gryffindor quidditch team.

Written because James was a Chaser, and I'm convinced Harry's athletic abilities come from both sides of the family tree.

crawl home by @annabtg

He doesn’t know if he’s alive or dead. All he knows is that he wants to go home.

Exhale by @petalsthefish

"Shhh," James leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers. "I’m so sorry, but I have to set the bones again. It’s okay to cry, you're doing so well. So well, baby."

"Fuck," she whimpered through her tears. "I hate this."

"I know, I know," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I hate this too, sweetheart."

Masquerade also by petalsthefish

James was going to jinx Sarah Hitchkes.

It was Sarah Hitchkes who conceived the entire idea, driven by two main motives. First, it was a fun and creative way for everyone to showcase their Patronuses. Second, it gave her the perfect excuse to throw a massive party. Scheduled for July 31st at her sprawling estate, the event was open to all the sixth- and seventh-year students. She dubbed it the “Patronus Party,” and it was set to be the social highlight of the summer—provided you could produce a corporeal Patronus.

this trope will always be a favorite of mine

Coincidence also by petalsthefish

“You look miserable.” Mary commented, noting Lily’s bored expression.

"I need to make out with someone like I need to breathe." Lily Evans hissed as she swirled her butterbeer and peered around the bar.

"James Potter's free."

In Their Short Time by @hogwartslivy

It was one hell of a love story. One that had a most tragic, untimely ending. They could never have guessed as mere children sitting across from one another on the train, all excitement and nerves and emotions, that their stories, all hopes and fears and loves, were to be forever intertwined.

Something Old Something New by @chiechie97

Weddings are the most beautiful things in the world. Unless you accidentally end up at your ex... somethings house to play violin at a family wedding.

Lily Evans just wants to get payed and go home to her cat. Perhaps she should have asked more questinos about the location and clients of her string quartets latest gig.

It’s Always You by @joyseuphoria

5 times jily kissed before they started dating

I'll keep your brittle heart warm by Iphigenniaa (on ao3)

Lily Evans didn't have to wash the blood off her hands that night, but she did have to wash the burning odor from her clothes, which seemed to soak even her own insides.

A Life With You by @kay-elle-cee

A Jily Lives AU collection of small moments from Hogwarts onwards, using the 31 Jilytober tumblr prompts.

7, 8, 10, 11, 12, 15, 17, 18, 20, 22, 24, 29 and 30 are my favourites

don't forget me by blackcanarys (on ao3)

At the height of the First Wizarding War, Lily Evans finds herself contemplating life, death and her mortality after a routine Order mission in 1978.

It's All Politics by acciosalmon (on ao3)

The most constant emotional sentiment in Lily's Hogwarts career was her complete and utter loathing of one William Mulciber

I have yet to read this one, but it was recomended to me because it explores how jily's power dynamic is altered when James isn't potraied as white but Lily is

[alwaysthefool]

Love Spell (Xavier x Reader/MC)

Tags; angst, pining, comfort, happy ending, MC reader, gn reader

Warnings; ask.

Synopsis: Someone else puts a ‘love spell’ on you and Xavier doesn’t realise it at first, leaving him feeling betrayed and rejected.

Have you ever heard the saying that budding love is like a sonata? It has a soft beginning, a precipice, a rise and fall, and an end that leads to relaxing silence. This was your precipice.

You were sure Xavier would ask you out, as you waited for him under the big oak outside the forest, the Sunday afternoon breeze gentle and solemn. It was definitely a romantic place to meet, the invitation in the form of a letter left on your desk, your heartbeat quickening as you saw a silhouette in the distance.

But the person that appeared in front of you wasn’t Xavier. It was another man, a fellow hunter, someone you’d declined much earlier.

“Hey, what-“ Before you could finish, a pink glowing light from a protocore flashed your eyes, and you felt your entire constitution change.

Xavier, on the other hand, wondering where you were on the day off, went out to look for you, only to find you arm in arm with another man, leaning your head on his shoulder.

“[Name]?” He called you out gently, a lump in his throat. You looked back, your expression cold and indifferent. “Why are you with him?”

“Hm? This is my lover.” You replied, looking up to smile at the man next to you. He chuckled, kissing your forehead, making Xavier clench his fists tightly.

“Have you-“ He began, but watching how happy you looked, he couldn’t go on. “Oh, I wish you the best then.”

Xavier grit his teeth and walked away, angry, dejected, close to breaking. Didn’t you make a promise to him? Weren’t things going smoothly between the two of you? Was he too late again?

It’s fine, he thought, it was better for you that way. You’d be safer with someone else, happier too. He was from your world, he’d understand you better, and it was selfish of Xavier to want you.

He had always been selfish when it came to you.

That night, he did not have the heart to return to his apartment above yours, going to Philo instead, raiding Jeremiah’s fridge for beer.

“No ‘Hi’?” Jeremiah joked, closing the shop early to tend to the pouting prince. Xavier did not respond, chugging the beer, trying very hard to feel the hit.

“It’s non-alcoholic, dude.”

Xavier almost choked, coughing. “You couldn’t tell me earlier?”

“It says so on the package.” Jeremiah held back a laugh, knowing it was trouble in paradise that had his leader in such a mood. He tried to prod, but as usual, Xavier wouldn’t tell him anything, so he looked at your social media instead.

“Who’s this guy?” He exclaimed, disgust on his face. Xavier grabbed Jeremiah’s phone, to see the post of you with that man at a toy store, captioned ‘loml’.

He felt like crying, like screaming, something to get the pain out. Jeremiah tried to stop him as Xavier ran out, turning on his hunter’s watch, doing what he always did.

He fought without a break, without dodging, knowing it was evil of him to try and get hurt so maybe, just maybe you’d care. Maybe you’d visit him at the hospital, and maybe he could change your mind. Maybe there was still a chance. Even though you’d crushed his heart, he would do anything for those little ‘maybe’s.

When he woke up next in the hospital, another hunter was beside him, and Xavier got to know you changed your partners to be closer to him instead.

Do you hate me that much?

Did you have to go so far?

But it was too unlike you to not even visit him at the hospital or leave a text, finally making him sense something was wrong. He had faith in that care you showed him, and your heart that through time and space, had always been a loving one.

No, you wouldn’t do this.

Xavier sprinted out of the hospital bed, ignoring the calls of the other hunter and the nurses, taking a taxi straight to your apartment complex. He had been blocked by ‘you’ everywhere, and looking up the history of your new partner showed a past temporary suspension for using protocore hypnosis, a technique strictly banned by the association.

Xavier did not knock, teleporting inside instead to see you and that man slow dancing in the living room. This time, Xavier showed no restraint, pulling that scammer away from you, and searching him for protocores.

“Xavier, you’re hurt?” You asked, despite your state. Before you could start to plead with him to let you go, Xavier crushed that protocore between his fingers, lifting the trance off of you. You immediately fell unconscious, making him turn all your attention towards you. Although that gave the hypnotist a way out, Xavier knew he wouldn’t be able to run forever.

You woke up groggy, full of disgusting memories with someone you despised, and hyper alert Xavier next to you.

You hugged him immediately, and he hugged back.

“Why didn’t you come earlier?” You scolded, tears in your eyes. Xavier was as angry at himself as you were, so he could just listen, his crushed heart breaking even further. “How could you think I’d run away with another man?”

Xavier pulled away from the hug to look at you, your red and tear stained face. His expression spoke the unsaid apology as you continued.

“Next time you see me with someone else, you have to pull me away! I’m all yours, and if I’m not, then consider I’m being mind-controlled.”

Xavier’s eyes softened at that, as you continued scolding him. You stopped midway, your irritation subdued. “How did you get hurt?”

“It doesn’t hurt anymore.”

-x-

Bonus;

As the two of you lay on your bed, finally talking out the feelings you’d been hiding, Xavier wrapped an arm around you, holding you close as he asked. “Did he touch you?”

You felt heat rise up to your cheeks, turning away from him to let him spoon you. “No, we didn’t even kiss.”

“I guess I’ll make it quick then.” Xavier mumbled to himself.

“Huh?”

“Shh… it’s not your worry anymore.”

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I DIDN'T KNOW LEONA KNEW ABOUR RAVEN'S CRUSH ON J WORD QUNFKANSKD does he tease her about her? does he takes advantage of this knowledge in some way?

also the “angsts about not being "the one"” made me kind of sad tho ngl jqnfkwnakdns DON'T DO THIS TO ME. (cries in a corner)

[Referencing this post!]

I MEAN... I feel like Raven's crush is obvious and easy to tell 😭 Girl is so bad at hiding it. Various other students in the cast (even ones she's not particularly friends with) such as Vil, Ace, Floyd, and Rook are aware of it. There's no way that someone as perceptive and as smart as Leona would let that one go over his head!

I think of this knowledge as being a constant source of angst for Leona (y'know, because it plays into his whole inferiority complex about being "second best, never first place"). He can't have his skills acknowledged, the crown, the interdorm magift tournament win, love... Life's not fair. If he's in a really bad mood, he might make a bitter jab about it. Maybe something like, "Why don't you go crying to that slimy eel bastard, since you clearly enjoy being lied to so long as it comes with a generous side of cooing?" If he's feeling more confident, he definitely finds ways to use the relationship for personal gain. For example, in the hostage situation my friend wrote, Leona is pressuring Octavinelle to hand over the money owed to Savanaclaw by using Raven as a bargaining chip. I guess she's just another pawn in his 5D chess games sometimes.

Speaking of Savanaclaw, I like to imagine that (because they admire their dorm leader so much) they're all super supportive of Leona and act as his wingmen + hype him up when he's clearly brooding. You can see the beginnings of this dynamic in the EBG posts, particularly when the mobs make Raven follow Leona around and how Ruggie often asks her to be more patient with him. In a lot of my Leona and Raven interactions, Ruggie tends to be the main wingman. He thinks it's funny seeing his dorm leader act all grumpy over prey and teases him about it, especially when Leona fucks up and acts overly aggressive/scares her. Really, Ruggie ends up being the guy helping Leona out the most by mediating arguments, running related errands, and gathering info on Raven's likes/dislikes (for a price, of course).

Jack is the underclassman that’s a little slow on the uptake. He sees how Leona stares at Raven and assumes they got beef. Ruggie shakes his head at Jack and tells him he doesn’t understand at all, he’s still an immature puppy! Jack wants to know what’s up, but he also doesn’t want to intrude on his dorm leader’s personal life.

As for the general Savanaclaw mobs 😂 I guess I just like the idea of a group of really buff guys being super invested in their aniki finding happiness. Real bro’s bros! ^^

[ghouljams]

how does one become free of insecurity? i’m already doing therapy but i feel i’ve only moved away from hating myself so much i want to d*e into just thinking everyone’s better than me

It's a long journey, but well worth it.

I don't think anyone is ever truly free of insecurity, but I think there's also a lot that is unpacked simply through the language we use to describe ourselves and the jokes we allow other people to make at our expense.

Therapy is great at helping you deal with the big feelings, but sometimes little things get caught in your head and it's hard to shake them. Here are some things that I do to keep myself feeling good, and also some things that I'm working on:

No suicide jokes. I make it a point never to joke about "oh I'll just kill myself" or anything like that because ultimately it just makes me feel worse and nobody finds it funny. It's also a good way to change your thinking and direct your solution brain away from "I'll just end things when shit gets hard." This one is a constant battle.

I compliment myself whenever I have the chance. I take every compliment someone gives me. I pretend to be vapid and self-absorbed. I make kissy faces at myself in the mirror. I tell other people how pretty I am, and I don't fucking care if they think I'm a stupid bimbo because I'm trying to love myself and that's more important.

Being kinder to my younger self. This one feels weird but I found myself being mean to little Ghoul when I was really sad. It feels easy to take out your anger on a kid that didn't know any better, and it doesn't guilt you because that's you that you're hating. But look. You were just a kid. You weren't stupid or ugly or unlovable or evil, you were a kid. I just caught myself calling my teenage self ugly the other day on my way to visit my mom and I had to stop and go "why am I saying this? I was just a kid." And it made me cry a li'l bit ngl, but if felt... idk it felt good in a way.

Don't let fucking anyone tell you, you're not worth it. Does your friend make jokes about how dumb you are? Or how you're so cringey? Or so embarrassing or bad at something or forgetful or WHATEVER? Yeah, fuck that noise. Tell them to stop doing that. Tell them it hurts your feelings and if they still don't stop they aren't your friend, they're your bully. I fucking hate bullies. Don't let anyone talk down to you, I don't care if it was a joke at first, it's not funny anymore. Fuck them.

This is something I'm working on, but when you start fixing one insecurity another will probably pop up. I've been working for a long time on liking how I look, and it's gone really well. But now I'm insecure about my intelligence. So I have to stop myself from calling myself stupid or not answering questions. I just fucking rocked my work trivia party, and Mr. Ghoul thinks I'm smart, so I just gotta keep track of my wins. Sometimes you realize that making yourself secure in one thing makes you insecure about another, but that's ok! There's a learning curve to all of this.

Everyone thinks everyone else is better than them. You don't have to be the best at everything, you don't even have to be the best at one thing! What's important is that you're doing your best. People notice when you're working hard, even if you're not churning out the best product because it means you care about it. Which brings me to

Done is better than perfect. Sure it would be great if you were God's most specialist soldier, but think about how much work that would be! Ok so you're not the world's best knitter, but the scarf you made your friend is their favorite scarf anyway because you made it. So you're not a world class writer, but you had a story in your head and you wrote it down. That's better than it never being written at all. Also just because you think it's bad doesn't mean other people won't think it's a masterpiece. Hell, half of the fics I wrote when I first started this blog I could write better now but that doesn't make them bad, it just means I've gotten better.

We as humans are constantly improving and evolving. Don't let who you are no stop you from striving towards who you'll be in the future. Taking one step down the path towards loving yourself is better than giving up and hating yourself forever. It's slow going, but man I've been doing this shit for a decade and I'm so much happier than I was at 18.

You might think that the more you improve the harder and faller you'll fall back to the bottom, but the lows don't get that low again. You're doing great. I'm proud of you.

[forestfrolickingfairy78]

Request: LU: Legend realising Time is the Hero before him

Artwork credits go to Jojo

I really hope you like it! I tried to write this as best as I could, I enjoyed writing this scene a lot, let me know what you think! Albeit did make me want to cry. Very much. I wish him happiness.

Legend knew the colour of death.

Before meeting his brothers, whether they’d agreed to be from blood or spirit the memories he kept of the people he loved were a testament to the fear of losing what he could recall of them. It started with the voice of his uncle, that day when all he had left to hold onto was the last words that couldn’t trace back to anything. The people he’d met on the path contorted by the fate to keep sealing and saving the world around him. The most heartache was the disillusion of the girl by the sea, finding himself exhausted by another cursed Odyssey. When she held him, gentle and sweet as the water he thought for a moment there was some reprieve in this constant manoeuvring, but it all it left him with was the blank canvas of a water-coloured painting, faded into a dream.

 It was cruel, how much his life had been pupeetered between this illusion of joy, plotted by the stroke of darkness while getting famished on the sweetness of a fleeting life. He didn’t have anything left of Marin, but he always possessed the power to travel between darkness.

The other heroes wondered why he’d always remark with spite, always shutting down the chance to find comfort in each other’s presence. Afterall, they were bound by this cycle of violence, pulled away from any chance to lead life normally. He envied them in some way or another, and the day the Hero of Time had led them into their home he found himself aching for what they had. A quiet and red envy grew as he watched them embrace each other,  speaking about what their future would be like when his had been stolen from him.

At least they all had someone, didn’t they?

Now underneath the red sky, peeling skin of flames bled another evil, testing their strengths. Legend looked up at the darkness, charcoal horizon swallowing their sights. They were outnumbered now, struggling to hold onto the sword. Sky felt his fingers weave from underneath the sword, glimmering a hopeful blue, but it wasn’t enough.

Legend tasted blood, wiping his mouth and tried to feign strength towards the monsters. Lizalfos, Skeletal bodies circling them without eyes, teasing their fall. What use was he without them? He knew he wasn’t weak, but he couldn’t ever be as strong as them, let alone the old man still holding up. His sword clashed aggressively against the beady eyed monster, breathless.

He looked over his shoulder, yelling at the younger one.

“Get up, you’re the only one who can save us!” A hard kick managed to knock over the enemy, but slowly, he was falling to his knees.

Legend didn’t think he would witness a sight like that, dragging himself forward. This was the only way he’d manage to fight, a hot flame of anger pushing strength, but today he couldn’t evoke that.

“Legend, get up!” He heard the old man before him, leaning over his sword, opening his eyes to the redness.

“I’m sorry…I’m tired.” The older hero had heard his quips, his quiet anger but never this genuine exhaustion. They were all so tired.

Time leant down to him, placing a heavy hand on his shoulder.

“Veteran-“ he paused, unsure what words to comfort him. In his eyes he saw the maelstrom of an ocean, threatening to spill. Behind those tempered words he could see the reflection of himself, young and afraid.

“I know, I need to keep going. I know!” Legend hated how his voice betrayed him, unable to steel his tone any longer. His hands tried to grip the sheathe, lacking power.

“I’m with you, you’re not alone.” Time wasn’t sure how to help, he’d respected the younger hero’s space, and in a way maintained it. If he had known that he was the hero who had caused his world’s darkness, it would shatter him. Legend tried to breathe, coughing from the smoke and fire.

“I know you’re there for me, and everyone. But I didn’t want to get close, not when it’s always ended in people, I love getting taken away from me.” Legend wiped his face, salt tears tracing down his skin, chaffing his skin. He felt foolish letting himself cry.

Time looked towards the Monsters, slowly heaving themselves up from the temporary death. It was how it would always be.

“That’s a sentiment we share.” Time spoke, closing his eyes for a moment. He let the words sink, when he’d first said that to Malon. When he’d promised himself at Legend’s age. It was how they kept their hearts safe, and again it was reflected in the hero that suffered because of him.

Time faced him, letting himself sigh.

“I’m sorry, you deserve better than this.” What he understood was the current moment, unfolding like another apocalypse. You’d think after a dozen choked skies, you’d get used to the colour it bore, but the silence only thickened.

“Why are you apologising? We’re all suffering.” Time didn’t speak, feeling the burden grow like a shadow between them.

“What is it?” Legend tried to find the older man’s gaze, but he would not look at him, slowly turning away his heel.

“For not letting you have the life, you deserved.” He left the words to manifest their meaning, but Legend realised it quickly. A churn in his gut slowly understanding the grief in his voice, a grief that he would inherit.

[emo-trash101]

HELLO HELLO HELLO ONYX‼️‼️‼️

I SAW THAT YOU'RE BACK

I MISSED YOU SO MUCH OMG.

(and your writing but you're more important <3)

ALSO WITH ARCANE??? YOU FEED ME.

So yeah,you guessed it,Arcane asking time‼️

May I have Salo (He's my baby girl I love him he's my favorite LOOK AT MY WIFE HE'S SO PRETTY.),Silco,Singed,Vander,Ambessa,Mel,Jayce and Viktor (feel free to remove or change some of them,I just love giving people a wide range of characters to choose from!! I just want Salo the most ajgehhw) with a CHILD!reader (haha platonic asker is back >:3) that they basically adopted from Zaun with a weird condition that makes them need to breathe through a filtering mask? Because they can't breathe normal air and has to get a certain gas in their lungs otherwise they aren't okay? Imagine it breaking after they get in a fight with someone or fall and they all just panic...

So basically gas mask baby. Just a little silly guy.

So yeah!! I really hope you enjoy writing this prompt,my dear friend!!!

Don't forget to eat,drink and take breaks as always!!

Always stay proud!!

Your mutual and friend,

-Nina <33

OMG IK IM SO EXCITED TO BE BACK! ALSO HAPPY THANKSGIVING IF ITS THIS TIME OF YEAR FOR YOU :))

Salo, Vander, Jayce and Victor x Asthmatic! Child

Platonic

Pronouns: Second person

Tw: illness, potential child endangerment (It's arcane so ERM, what else do you expect) Also potential spoilers

Salo -

- I think he was like most people from piltover and was like "UHM, what is this dirty little dirt baby doing near me why are they coughing are they diseased?"

- I think the beginning of him taking you in would be like, he decides you probably shouldn't be in the road coughing and essentially on the verge of perishment.

- So he takes you to the nearest doctors office and is like fully prepared to just, disappear.

- That was until the doctor looks at him and says "Oh, councilor Salo, I didn't know you had a child?"

- After that he just, accepted his fate as a father.

- At first I don't think he would be that warm and comforting, but it's just generally an adjustment period.

- He learns to take care of you through long amounts of trial and error, and eventually you both form a decent connection.

- It wasn't exactly father and child, but more so friendly roommates

- That was until you finally got your diagnosis.

- Before now he was kinda just your dad in theory, sure he fed you and helped you when you cried and comforted you through long nights when you couldn't breathe but that was completely and totally just because he had to.

- But something inside of him just feels so sad for you when the doctor first straps your mask onto your face.

-After that your relationship changes for the better.

-You both seem to bond and become more close in a way that he wasn't exactly expecting.

-He becomes more vigilant about what you eat and what you're doing and making sure that you don't break your mask.

- Eventually, he feels more like your dad in a real sense, not just on metaphorical paper.

Vander (Pre ep3) -

- At first he wasn't exactly going to become fatherly figure to you.

- I mean after all he has 4 other children he has to look after and you surely have parents somewhere.

- It took one week for the powder and the others to get used to you being there, and 2 weeks for Vander to realize no one was coming for you.

- After that Vander decided that it was better to just take you under his wing and care for you.

- First thing he did after deciding that was getting into contact with the best doctor in Zaun to try and figure out why you were coughing so much.

- The next thing he did was try not to cry when they forced the mask onto you so that you could breathe.

- After that though, things went significantly well.

- You bonded more closely with Powder than anyone, mainly because of the feeling of being both the youngest and the least helpful.

- Even when they did take you on missions, you'd get out of breath, or get your mask broken.

- Vander learned very fast that he should learn how to fix it.

- But after that, everything was good, and you had a family for as long as that could last.

Jayce -

- Of most of the people in Piltover, I think he would be the one of the most inclined to help you.

- I feel like he would pretty consistently take walks out, and that's where he would find you.

- He would find you sitting against a wall coughing so hard it was sure to have been heard at least a mile away.

- He would definitely panic and try to talk to you and figure out what happened, and then realize that verbal communication is the least effective communication for him to have picked.

-So instead he picks you up and rushes you to the nearest doctors office.

- With the way that he's so panicked and treating you so kindly, the doctors just assume that he's your father.

- After the doctors explain to him what your illness is he immediately thinks of Victor.

- At first, his reason behind taking care of you was that he was just making sure you were okay before he looks for your real parents.

- But eventually, he just gets so used to you being around that he kinda just forgets that he should be looking for them, and instead just leans into the fatherly role.

- It took a lot of sleepless nights and a lot of conversations with Mel to figure out how to take care of a child and how to progress with your illness.

- And after all of it, he officially files for adoption of you.

- And he's the best dad you could ever ask for

Victor -

- Objectively, I think he would be the best out of all of them.

- He likely found you before he went to Piltover, and he took care of you almost immediately.

- He knows how it feels to be different from other kids your age, what it's like to be made just, wrong.

-He cares for you, and eventually he moves you both to Piltover.

-It was an extremely risky decision for him to have made, but it was for you to get a good doctor, and for him to get a good job.

- After you receive your mask and your diagnosis, he becomes more protective.

- He cleans your mask once a day to make sure it doesn't build up gunk and becomes more dangerous to your lungs.

- He also becomes more vigilant on what you're doing and if that can cause your mask to break.

- After he eventually receives his diagnosis, he decides that after his time is up that he's going to give you to Jayce.

- But before that time comes, he's gonna love you like you're his own.

UHM I feel like these got aggressively more depressing but it's probably fine, I hope you enjoyed this one Nina!

Make sure to drink water and eat food :)

[weeping-statue]

I love your writing, you're literally my favorite writer on here!

If requests are open, can I request headcanons of Norton with a GN!reader who is introverted? Not shy or anything, but they just avoid people because they don't know what to say to anyone.

They don't go up to anyone to speak themselves, so they kind of stare at people (unintentionally) and hope that whoever they're looking at will come up to them.

They're kinda quiet at first, but once you get them talking, they'll never stop.

I was wondering if it can just be general headcanons of what a relationship would be like!

Please and thank you! Sorry if this is too much!

-🔮

I’m so sorry I took me this long to answer, I have a shit ton of asks and I’m trying to get through them<3

That’s very sweet of you tho, I’m happy that you enjoy my work <3

I’ve been editing it here and there but I just needed to post it out today

Norton and a Introvert!Reader

———————————————————————

You just don’t like people, and you don’t know what to say?

Well neither does he.

He thinks they’re rich snobs who’ll try to manipulate him and he just doesn’t think the conversation is even worth it depending on who it is.

He doesn’t speak a lot to begin with, so he doesn’t mind if you talk his ear off, just only when he’s in a good mood.

When he’s in a bad mood he’ll either want to be alone or find solace in your arms, but they’ll both have to be in silence. No more noise.

He enjoys that you’re an introvert because it gives him more of a reason to stay away from everyone.

Sometimes from across a room he can feel someone staring into his back and he’ll immediately know it’s you. He doesn’t find it creepy, since he stares off into space too.

The first time it happened though, he thought you had a problem with him. And asked you what your deal was.

Other people sometimes get creeped out at the blank stare you give but few are used to it.

Norton and you were sitting in the dining room talking, as he polished his magnets.

“I didn’t think kiting a literal wheel would make me want to cry. I don’t understand why I’m getting chased around by a fucking car part. This is just ludicrous.” You exclaimed, sitting across from him with your head in your hands.

Norton nodded, he too hated the three brothers, mainly because they creeped him out, and irritated him. “Annoying bastards is what they are.” He replied.

Fredrick had entered the room overhearing your.. unsavory words about the Will brothers and cleared his throat.

Norton looked him up and down, a scowl emerging on his face. “You’re interrupting our conversation. Get lost.”

Fredrick raised an eyebrow at his bluntness, “Such vulgar behavior. No wonder the only one who tolerates you is the other lowlife.”

Norton stood up immediately, giving you a gesture with his head to follow him. “Apparently it’s a crime to be an introvert.”

Fredrick scoffs as you follow him, not saying another word and letting the two leave.

Outside Norton was waiting for you with his hand out, gripping onto yours tightly. “He’s rich, and loud, he doesn’t know what he’s saying. We’re not lowlifes, we’re just fed up and tired.”

You squeeze his hand in reassurance, “I know.” Dragging him along towards your room smiling, you say, “Come on, I’ll finish telling you all about my match and then I’ll make us some snacks!”

———————————————————————

Lowkey I stare at people with a blank face for some reason until I realize what I’m doing and smile.

[somethingserious]

every player having a piece of the believe sign! some of them keeping it with things they value most, like Sam’s with his Nigeria national team photo, Jamie with the book Ted gave him in episode 3!!! And some of them keeping it with them hidden in their kit, so they can keep the feeling safe with them in their hearts while they leave everything they have out on the pitch!!!! unbelievable fucking writing

[satorisoup]

people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T

tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[arttsuka]

I can't take it anymore

[crossbackpoke-check]

Dysprosium, Mary Soon Lee

dysprosium, AN 66, is a silvery-white rare earth metal. its name is derived from the greek dysprositos, meaning “hard to get at”, owing to the difficulty in separating and isolating this rare earth element. dysprosium is used to measure neutron flux, to fuel reactors, and to activate phosphors. terfenol-d is a magnetorestrictive alloy, meaning that it changes shape when a magnetic field is applied, and is used to manufacture underwater acoustic systems.

jason “robo” robertson, dallas stars #21 for @simmyfrobby’s nhl periodic table poems <3

[kohakhearts]

theres a really. special kind of despair in the uncertainty brought about by moments of success and achievement. the inevitable “what now” of reaching your goals. and i kind of wish someone had warned me how hollow graduating university would feel, tbh