#why tf is jungkook and dick doing together lol
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whyse7vn · 10 months ago
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MISS YOU -
[ !fwb jhs pjm ksj jjk kth x reader ]
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HOSEOK -
hobi: hi
y/n: ur texting me before 5pm should i be scared rn….
hobi: i miss you
y/n: oh i’m terrified
hobi: can’t a man simply miss his girl???
y/n: i’m shaking in my boots dni
and ur girl???
shut the hell up
hobi: i miss you
y/n: STOP
this is really weird
hobi: ok i’m never being nice again
y/n: 💜
hobi: i lied i’m just a nice guy at heart
i miss you my pretty little petal 💘
y/n: this is a new low for you hoseok
hobi: i told you about saying my name
i’m trying to be sweet to u rn
not horny
y/n: our relationship is literally built on being horny wtf are you talking about
hobi: do you miss me
say yes if yes and no if yes
y/n: ok that is real unfair
hobi: yes or no
no jungkook
y/n: speaking to you before 5pm truly feels illegal
hobi: i talk to you before 5pm
like all the time
don’t make me look bad rn
we literally work together
i talk to you all the time???????????
y/n: u sound like ur trying to convince urself you talk to me
hobi: I LITERALLY DO STOP LYING
y/n: ok yeah you do but you only message me to fuck after 5pm
hobi: i never said i wanted to fuck?????
y/n: so you don’t want to fuck??
hobi: ok yes
y/n: knew it
hobi: yeah whatever
BUT
i just thought i would try and be a sweet loving man for u
y/n: well don’t do it again
freaked me the hell out
hobi: u wanna be my girlfriend so bad i’m gonna throw up
y/n: ???????????
hobi: ok sorry
y/n: freak
hobi: miss ur pussy on my face
y/n: i’m literally blocking you
ur so gross
hobi: ok wtf
how do i win in this life
cant be sweet
cant be explicit
HOW DO I WIN
y/n: ask to fuck nicely
hobi: may i please indulge in the sexual intercourse with you at 1400 hours
y/n: and normally
hobi: can we fuck in like 20 minutes
in my studio preferably
pls and thanks 😝
y/n: sure
hobi: TURN UPPP
that was really easy
y/n: did you just call me easy?????????
hobi: NO??????
y/n: you definitely did
hobi: NONONONO
i’m just saying like normally i’d have to beg a little
ur kind of a sadist like that
anyways
you didn’t make me beg today
dare i say
dot dot dot
ur stating to fall in love with me wink
y/n: did you just type out dot dot dot and wink???
hobi: say yes if yes and no if yes
y/n: stop breathing
hobi: hard
and no not by shinee
this one is by hoseok
but WAIT
(no dino)
if we think about it is by you
hard by you
wink lol
y/n: ur so fucking lame it’s unreal
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JIMIN -
jimin: miss you
wanna kiss you so bad
y/n: personally i wanna fuck
jimin: …
is it really that hard to act like you were loved as a child for even a little bit
y/n: all i’m hearing rn is you don’t want to fuck
ur LAME
jimin: do you not miss me back?
y/n: next question
jimin: do you miss me???
y/n: purple
pull ur dick out
jimin: i’m getting real upset
what if i cry rn
y/n: lowkey
jimin: stop talking
y/n: it WOULD be real hot
jimin: …
i’m trying to be cute and love on u rn
y/n: gross
love on ur girlfriend or something
jimin: ur my girlfriend
y/n: i’m ur girl friend you fuck sometimes
the big space was on purpose btw
if you didn’t get that
jimin: ok fuck????
i get it
so like do you fr not miss me back or what?
y/n: for someone who said they get it ur not acting like you get it
jimin: i get it
y/n: get a guitar
jimin: what
y/n: riize
jimin: rise?
y/n: talk saxy
jimin: tf are u talking about
y/n: ur so annoying
jimin: can you say you miss me back
y/n: no!
jimin: i’m gonna stop fucking you
y/n: ok
jimin: ok i lied but were you scared for a second
y/n: not really
jimin: ok idc
y/n: who is ur riize bais
mine is shotaro
he’s a real cuite
jimin: mine is i miss you jimin
y/n: i’m not saying i miss you
jimin: why not?
y/n: why?
jimin: because you miss me???
y/n: i saw you last week??
jimin: LAST WEEK
oh my chest hurts
the walls are caving in
y/n: are you done
jimin: should we just make it official
y/n: if ur this annoying and a fuck buddy i don’t even want to imagine what ur like as a boyfriend
jimin: better
y/n: i doubt that!
jimin: let’s find out challenge go!!!!
y/n: i do NOT consent
jimin: hello girlfriend do you miss me like i miss you????????
y/n: i’m gonna start fucking joon
jimin: say sike
that’s not funny at ALL
say sike rn
HELLO???????????????
SAY SIKE Y/N
IM SO FR SAY SIKE
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SEOKJIN -
jin: miss you
y/n: ☠️☠️☠️☠️
just send that to jimin
he’s laughing at you
jin: wtf is ur problem
y/n: why are you messaging me during works hours??
jin: cuz i missed you???
yeah i said missed
not miss
cuz fuck you
you made me look weak in front of jimin
you bitch
y/n: what if i said i missed you too?
jin: ofc you miss me
that was a given
i was just letting you know the feeling was mutual
y/n: that’s crazy cuz i don’t miss you at all
jin: ????
are you proposing to me rn?
y/n: ?get a grip
jin: need you here rn
y/n: i’m trying to work
jin: ok?? idk what that has to do with anything
y/n: i’m working
jin: are we role playing??
y/n: no.
jin: omg i was just kidding lighten up a bit geez
pretty girl i miss you
no even joking
y/n: pic with tears or ur lying
jin: you make missing you not fun at all
y/n: is missing ur fuck buddy supposed to be fun??
jin: we’re still calling it that?
y/n: ??
jin: it’s fine
i’ll indulge you and ur games
y/n: LMAOOO ???
ur age is really showing
talking like a fucking vampire
jin: yeah yeah
what time do you finish
y/n: in exactly an hour
jin: i’ll pick you up
will bring the nice car and everything
y/n: all ur cars are nice
jin: i know
just wanted to hear you say it
y/n: eat the rich i say!
jin: i’ll let you eat me
let’s go bite for bite
y/n: jimin would have a field day with that
jin: i don’t want to talk about jimin while i’m seducing you thank you very much
y/n: ur seducing me??
jin: yeah
you couldn’t tell?
y/n: no?
jin: ur lying
y/n: maybe i am
jin: that’s what i thought
y/n: maybe i’m not
jin: you are
y/n: but what if i’m not
jin: no you are
y/n: am i?
jin: shut up
it’s like nice when you just don’t talk
and stop pretending you hate me
y/n: hate is a strong word
jin: so you love me?
y/n: love is a strong word
jin: fuck you
y/n: YOU WISH
jin: not true
y/n: IS THAT YOU OUTSIDE??????
WAVE IF THATS YOU
OH MYGOD YOU WAVED
THATS YOU
UR OUTSIDE
jin: i’m outside
y/n: ??????? HOW
jin: god knows
y/n: i said an hour
jin: an hour is too long dont you think :/
y/n: UGH
men
YOU MAKE ME SICK
give me 5
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JUNGKOOK -
jk: come see me
y/n: ??LMAOOSODOFIDIFJFNDJJDJDJDJ SJDJDJDNDNDNDNNDNFNFNFNFNFNNDNDNFNFNFNFNFNFNFNNFNFNFNFNNFCJ
jk: ok i’m sorry i though you would find that really sexy and cool
y/n: that was really funny
imagined you saying that in real life LMSKDKKDF
THATS SO FUNNT WLMSKDODOFIFJFJFJFJFN
wow ur really silly
jk: i miss you
like so much
y/n: do you miss ME or do you miss fucking me
jk: is this a trick question?
y/n: not at all
jk: both?
y/n: are you sure
cuz you don’t sound sure
jk: it’s a trick question
y/n: i’m telling you it’s not
jk: if i say i miss fucking you ur gonna think i’m just using you for sex and that i’m horrible person that should die
but if i say i miss you ur gonna think i’m a stupid idiot loser who can’t control his feelings and should kill himself
y/n: is this u projecting rn??
jk: can i come over please
y/n: answer my question first
jk: i did !!!! i said both
y/n: you said
“both?”
jk: ok now i’m saying both!!!!
y/n: your just saying cuz you want to come over
so you miss fucking me
i see
jk: NO
well yes
bUT LIKE NOT JUST THAT I MISS YOu
LIKE YOU
as A PERSON
your smile
your voice
your like overall presence???
y/n: why is everything a question with you
stand on business kook
jk: you make me second guess everything
IM SO NERVOUS LEAVE ME ALONE
y/n: okay let’s not shout now
jk: ok i’m sorry
i’m really sorry
hey i’m sorry
y/n: guys i think he’s sorry
jk: guys??? who is there? don’t tell me it’s yoongi he’ll bully me
y/n: you want come over?
jk: so bad
y/n: ok
but you have to pay me in like
JUNGKOOK WHAT THE FUCK YOU JUST SENT ME 50K???/!/£:’dn
jk: you said pay
y/n: I DIDN’T FINISH MY SENTENCE??????
jk: oh
my fault
i’m sorry
i’m really sorry
you can keep it
for rainy day or something?????
carry on what were you saying??
i didn’t mean to interrupt
y/n: wow ok um i was just gonna say tteokbokki or something
jk: with cheese right?
you like it with cheese yeah?
i’ll come over and make it for you i’ll head to the store rn
anything else???
y/n: ummm no
jk: ok i can start making my way right?
y/n: yeah…
jk: cool ok see you soon
y/n: cool
cool wow yeah cool
that’s cool
wtf just happened
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TAEHYUNG -
14 miss calls from tae
tae: throbbing rn
y/n: it’s 3 am what the fuck is wrong with you
and throbbing?????????
you
nvm
i don’t even want to finish my sentence
jump of a bridge cut ur dick off idc leave me alone
tae: i miss you
y/n: no shit
tae: told my parents were engaged
y/n: convinced all you do all day is pop percs and take punches to the head
tae: you can give me head
i miss ur head
and you ig
but like ur head 😍
meow
y/n: meow???
tae: MEOWWWWWWWW
y/n: what do you want??
it’s 3 am
tae: head???
like
are you stupid
wasn’t i clear enough
ACTUALLY NO WAIT
i miss you🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
what did nct say that one time
girl your my favourite 😋😍💗
y/n: i should call mark
tae: OMG YEAH
you think he’ll sing a bit for us
GIRL UR MY FAVOURITEEEEE
wait no???????
wtf
don’t call mark
are you sick
are you out of ur mind
i just called you my favourite and now ur calling mark?????
y/n: puka puka pow pow 💚
tae: ok but i said i miss you
y/n: k
tae: me missing you
like that’s what’s happening rn
ME missing YOU
do you understand
y/n: yess thank you ur so kind !🌷💞💘
tae: ??????
say it back maybe
y/n: no thanks!
tae: okay lol
the more you deny my love
y/n: yuck
tae: ok never interrupt me again
or we WILL have issues
y/n: are you talking to me rn…
tae: NO LMAO WHAAAATTT i must of forgot where i was for a second why would i ever threaten my beautiful amazing queen
y/n: ok not too much
tae: love you!
y/n: ur making me sick gonna throw up
tae: i’ll catch it
with my hands
y/n: stop
tae: eat it if you want me too
y/n: you lack serious amounts of self respect and it’s extremely worrying
tae: will you give me head
y/n: only if you never speak ever again
tae: ohmygod literally call me ariel babe like you give me head and my voice box will literally melt out my body
NO WORDS
ever again NO JOKE
y/n: the way you lie so easily is kinda scary
tae: i’m not lying
okay I AM lying but like how am i supposed to call you at 3 am and beg you to come over if i can’t speak
y/n: that’s the point!
tae: ummmmm
that’s mean
like you would so miss my voice if i didn’t have one
y/n: if you didn’t have a voice how could i miss it if you never had one???
tae: what
y/n: like ur saying if you NEVER had i voice i would miss it
but i can’t miss it if i’ve never heard it before
tae: that logic is stupid cuz ur saying you can’t miss things you’ve never had
y/n: you can’t
tae: i miss our wedding night
y/n: shut up
tae: throbbing
you make me throb
THROBBING ❤️
y/n: shut up shut up shut UP
tae: totally random pov ur boyfriend calls you 700 times and messages you at 3 am telling you he’s throbbing and is offering himself to you on a silver plater fuck the the knife and fork he wants it messy
what you doing in that situation??
y/n: sending a swat team to his address
tae: i’m your boyfriend???
y/n: ?
tae: YOU BASICALLY SAID IM YOUR BOYFRIEND
THIS IS A WIN
THIS IS A WIN
OH MY GOD A WIN
WIN WIN WIN WIN WIN
I WIN
OHMYGOD I WIN
i win
ohmYGODDDD
i would like to thank yeontan and my parents and hybe and son heung min for this win
i owe it all to you guys
i promise to keep working hard
and never let any of you down i’m just so extremely grateful
and i just wanna add that
SMS ERROR: The phone number you are trying to reach is no longer in service!
tae: gf so crazy like 🤭
yessss this was half a draft for the first fwb work i did so if you see any similarities that’s why but this is also half a request cuz somone asked me to make a fwb piece about them missing you but i lost the little ask thingy i’m so sorry don’t shoot me ALSO obviously all the members aren’t here cuz this was a scrap but then i was like omg this is too silly to throw away so i posted here hope you like >.<
tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @sopebubbles-replies @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin
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jkfortunekookies · 8 years ago
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LET'S PLAY A GAME
THE rule is to select the most recent words used on your phone’s to make a sentence
HERE’S THE RESULT I GOT :
Jungkook’s dick is the most important thing to remember that you can always find more information about . the only thing that you have to be on top of the best part about being in the world 💜 I love you too ❤ the roommate au isn’t over the weekend and we can talk about it. I hope you have a girlfriend? Jk the same time. I am a beautiful person who is the most part of my favorite part of my life and the other hand is not an option for you to know about it. I hope you have a good time to time and money on your computer to block the most important things to do with the same time. the first place in the past few years ago and I will be a good time to time and effort to make sure you have to be a dominant the one who is the best in life and the kids were going to be there to see you smile often.
My reaction :
Wtf is wrong with this world. I’ve been fooled. ISTG I NEVER .EVER.EVER.EVER BROUGHT UP THE D IN A CONVERSATION FOR A WHILE NOW. IDK WHYYYYY DHDJDKDK I don’t rmemeber using this word 😨😨😨😨😨😨 I CAN’T BELIEVE EMOJIS WERE SAVED THERE AS WELL 😂😂😂😂😂 IT MUST MEAN I USED THEM A LOOOOOT LOLLLLL I SOUND LIKE A B …OH LORD ….. AUTOMATIC SPEECH RUINED ME 😂😂😂 I SOUND LIKE A H*E WHEN THERE’S NO CONTEXT LOLL I tag @kookiewithak @jinssmile @jeylovestoblog @bangtannoon @fetus-jungkook to do the challenge !
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