#why does it feel different to take a hit alone than to share it with somebody else? why does that make us more reluctant?

[bylong-sun]

So this is a fanfic of this work is from @whalemleck ,all credits for this talented person, I fell in love with it and I will do some more little things here and there (with permission from the creator of course).

This write is based on this post, go check.

English is not my first language.

Please enjoy!

The warmth of colors

Since B-127 was online there ware always a color that seems to follow him during his life.

When B-127 was a little sparkling, he shared a "room" with others sparklings, it was a simple room for them to study (and study only) nothing really stand's out in there. But B-127 notices this irregular little red light on the ceiling, it was different ,it shouldn't be there for sure.

It is really distracting.

And B-127 couldn't help himself but getting distracted by the red light.

(B-127 didn't know yet but he likes red, red was the first thing he ever seen when he got online and being able to see one more time means that the yellow sparkling was strong enough (not like the others sparklings).

Then when he started work for Sentinel Prime, he almost didn't notice at first but there was a persistent red spot following the Prime, everywhere to be exactly, it wasn't strange for Sentinel to have followers, that's why he's here (and other things too). But it's really odd, everytime the Prime is in public there was him. Looking at Sentinel ,that was a stranger behavior for a race bot, should he report this to Arachnid?

Well... the red bot didn't do anything other than following the Prime so the Guard let it aside (for now).

That was until he was walking alone on the racing stadium, the same red bot was there talking to others bots ,smiling and laughing with them, something inside him felt warm. The Guard don't know for how long he have steering at the bot, but the next thing he knows is that the red bot see him.

They made eyes contact...

Then...

A spark...

What was that?

What is this?

His body is shaking, although is not fear that his feeling, no it's not that... what was the word again?

No, nononono he have a job to do here and is better being done so he can go back to Sentinel, shaking his helmet the Guard give a last look at the red bot before walking out.

"Hey, wait!"

He stop.

Look to the other side of the hallway and there was the red bot.

"We need to talk... Please"

CliffJumper.

That was his... Spark brother's name.

What does that mean... Bee don't know.

But it's warm and Bee likes red.

Red now is a constant in his life and he was... Happy as his brother says, Bee still doesn't understand what it means.

But it's okay, he was... Okay.

Until other color invaded his life.

Sentinel had send him to supervise a mine area, it seems that this place was having some... problems, this was a simple quest for Bee of course.

Bee was on top of a platform when something got his attention, going up and down a shining blue and red stood out from the crowd of bots, that miner is really... Something.

Always with a gray bot on his side, talking ,smiling ,helping others. That bot remember him of his brother.

Bee was "distracted" with the report, when he saw it out of the corner of his eye something coming fast in his direction ,with a quick movement Bee activates just one knife hand and cuts a jetpack without having to move much.

And then he was on the ground.

"Wow, that was awesome bossbot!"

The same blue and red miner was top of him for some reason, Bee take a good look at him. What was his doing? Was he going to kill Bee? Should Bee kill him first?

The mine was silent.

He stayed silent, ready to pull off the helmet of the blue bot with his barehand.

"Sorry about him boss, are you alright?"

The grey miner pull the bigger miner off of him, hitting him on the helmet after.

Bee quietly got up.

"Ah! Yes! Sorry about that, i saw the jetpack going to you direction and I just acted out of impulse to protect you-"

Protect?

Him?

Why?

Because his the superior in this area? That left a bad taste in his mouth for some reason.

"... Back to work... All of you"

He was shaking for the third time in his life.

Bee did tell about what happened to his brother after finished the job, Cliff gave him a smile and said it was normal to help people in need or in danger ,like he do when someone gets hurt when they are racing, still don't make sense to Bee. But if his brother is telling him it's a good thing to do, he will do!

Blue is... a good color.

Although he prefers red.

--------------------------------------------------

He have a new mission.

Someone is getting into the Archives and nether Sentinel or Arachnid are happy about it. The Archives were supposedly highly protected, so how in Cybertron is someone getting into the place and is still alive, Bee doesn't care he got a job to do and that's what he's going to do.

Take out the trash.

Bee could've go alone, but for some reason Sentinel himself wanted to be there too and who is he to contrary his Prime wishes.

Creak.

"... I hear a sound" both his audials rise.

"Oh, it's probably just a little botuse (mouse)" Sentinel had a grin on his face.

"I see something in the dark" Bee active one knife, looking around.

"I only see files" the grin increase, as he expects to see a show.

"I know there's someone there, my Prime" his sensors on high alert.

"Not as far as I'm aware" Sentinel fakely dismiss his words.

Bee gave a small nod and deactivated his knife hand, going back to his formal posture.

"It was a long night for the both of us" Sentinel go back the table and pick up a tablet.

"... But I heard a creak" one of his audials raise again hearing the same sound.

"Just relax"

Bee goes as quickly and quiet as he ever knows to where he heard the sound, Sentinel was almost jumping from where he was sitting with excitement. Ready to kill who ever was there, the yellow guard didn't expect to freeze in place when when he saw a familiar shade of blue and red. Those aren't the two miners on level ten? They looked at him in pure fear, they shouldn't be here, what are they doing here?

Where they the ones who he was supposed to exterminate?

Some tiks passed.

"Well?"

The Blue bot shok his helmet slowly, pleading with his eyes.

They're helpless... Bee is going to do what he was here for. He was going to kill help them.

Oh, Primus in the All Spark.

As if fate decided to help them this day, a real botuse (mouse) ran to his legs. Bee acts fast and crushes the little creature, returning to his neutral self.

"... You're right my Prime, it was indeed a little botuse"

Bee goes to the Prime side, like nothing had happened. The lider was disappointed, looking at the poor crushed botuse.

"It's getting late and it seems that our little problem will not show up tonight... What a waste of my time" he goes to the exit. "Ah! You're in charge now, but you already know that right"

Bee nod's.

"Perfect! Good night"

When Bee thinks it's safe, he call the two bots. The gray one start apologize for himself and the other bot, who is complaining of pain while holding his helmet.

Bee feels strange.

This is going to be a long night for sure.

[trippinsorrows]

ltye + gym time

authors: this was inspired by a request/suggestion by @romansthrone we all know smut is hit or miss for me, but this felt very much like something that needed to be done, so here we are. i.e. idk wtf this is, but we're just going with it, friends.

warnings: smut

words: 2k

gif belongs to @romanreigns (don't know why the stupid tag never works smh)

Solana has come to enjoy training. Come to enjoy feeling herself growing stronger: mentally and physically. It’s a different but welcomed experience. So, it’s no big deal to her when Bayley and Naomi text that they’re stuck in traffic due to a bad accident that essentially shut down the interstate. Knowing they’re going to be more than just a couple minutes late, they instruct her to get started on her stretching until they get there. Not a big deal.

She’s confident enough to do that all on her own.

But therein lies the issue.

She’s not alone.

Because walking into the home gym, she’s met with none other than the hulking 6’3 frame of her husband who’s in the middle of a bench press.

“Oh.”

Solana was unaware of the fact that Roman planned to come back home after leaving their bed around 7am this morning. She figured he’d get his workout in elsewhere, maybe the Warehouse. Not at their home though. Especially not when she needs the space to train.

But her reaction is not one of anger or irritation. It’s something…..else. Something that’s solely driven by the fact that Roman’s physique is something crafted by the Gods themselves. His massive shoulders and bulging biceps are on full display in the sleeveless dri-fit workout top, and she would never admit it out loud, but it’s hard for her eyes not to focus on the bulge that’s pressing against his workout shorts as he pushes his muscles—and her self-control—to the limit.

It’s only when he goes to sit up that she redirects her attention to another machine. Anything to hide the truth of what she was really staring at.

“I—” She clears her throat. “I—I have training today.” Solana grips her water bottle, tightly, as she forces her gaze back on him. Her stomach caves in just ever so slightly watching him stand up and walk over to her. “I—I need to stretch.” Something flashes in Roman’s eyes, something she recognizes but refuses to feed into. “Bay—Bayley and Naomi. They’re—they’re running late.”

“Mmmm.” Her body is practically on fire under his intense gaze, the way his eyes can’t seem to decide if they wanna focus on her face or her chest. “How late?”

But, it’s that question that makes Solana realize she has to take some control. Stepping to the side of him, she moves over to the area with matts that face a section of mirrored walls. “I—I won’t bother you.”

She hears Roman behind her. Sees through the mirror how he can’t seem to rip his eyes from her ass. “You never bother me, Solana.” It’s an almost sweet sentiment that makes her smile a bit until the next part comes out. “But you damn sure distract me……”

No, no, no

Walking back over to him, almost shuffling, she takes a deep breath, doing her best to stay focused and not distracted like him. “Okay, we—we can share this space. I do my stretching and you just….like….do what you do.” She nods and can acknowledge the fact that she’s not sure just who she’s trying to convince. Him or her. “Okay?”

Roman doesn’t say anything, just tilts his head to the side, tongue licking his bottom lip.

Oh my god.

“Okay,” she says over a shaky breath, turning to walk away so she can get started and be done. Maybe she can talk the ladies into training outside today, because it’s clear Roman just got started and won’t be done anytime soon. And his focus seems to be on everything but working out, which is no good for her when she’s also struggling to remember her reason for even coming in here….

To her credit, Solana does well. Ish. Because every so often, she’ll look into the mirror and accidentally catch Roman’s eye. Sometimes, she can tell he was already looking in her direction. Other times, it’s truly a coincidence. Regardless of the reason, it helps her realize one very important thing.

That she’s just as distracted by him as he is by her.

But, she stays strong, stays as focused as possible.

Until she does one too many moves, one too many distracting moves. 

Solana is bent over, hands on her right foot, enjoying the stretch of her limbs, the releasing of all tension in her muscles when she feels it. Feels him.

Solana gasps and shoots upward. Roman is directly behind her, his erection pressed into her ass, his hands on her hips. “Roman!”

“You really expect me to just stand here watching you bend over every which way and not get hard as fuck?” His hand moves to her stomach, bracing her against him. Solana’s hand moves over his as her eyes flutter shut.

“Roman….” The resolve is practically gone, and even she can admit she sounds more needy than anything. That nothing in the way she says his name indicates she wants him to stop, wants him to move away.

“You said you need to stretch, right?” He’s so cruel, the way he shifts behind her, almost teasing his rock hard dick against her ass cheeks at the same time he moves his hand upwards and gropes her breast. “So let me stretch you out.” 

It should be a no. Should be a declined offer. Something that doesn’t result in clothes and plans being discarded in favor of carnal temptations being fulfilled. 

She needs to be ready for training. He needs to lift. 

They had agendas that shouldn’t be altered, but the minute Roman looks at her through the mirror, full lips lifting into a smirk as he slips his hand into her sports bra and gently squeezes her breast, she knows that it’s a wrap. 

And in what feels like only seconds, Roman has her shorts off, her panties somewhere thrown about and her hands planted on the mirrored wall as he thrusts deep into her from behind.

“Roman.” When he’s inside her like this, dick throbbing and pulsing, it seems like the only word in her vocabulary is his name, a couple of profanities, and a few almost slurred indistinguishable sounds that could be words but really aren’t. “Mmmm”

Roman, however, can’t seem to take his eyes off her ass, the way it bounces off his thick dick that’s coated in her essence. “All this body you got, and you really thought I wasn’t going to touch you?” His hand moves to the small of her back, helping to steady her. “Wasn’t going to bury my dick inside you and watch you come apart?”

Solana says nothing, too focused on trying to keep her knees from giving out. Roman’s thrusts are controlled and focused but powerful and profound. It’s hard to keep her arms steady as he drives into her with all the passion and desire.

“P–please—” Eyes crunched up, Solana has the hardest time not screaming, yelling, shouting, anything to release the influx of overwhelming emotions—and pleasure. It hurts, but it doesn’t. It’s good, but it’s amazing. Too much but not enough. He’s giving her everything she needs yet more than what she can handle. “I—ca—” Moving one hand off the glass, she reaches behind her and struggles to get out a logical request. “It’s too—”

At that, he pauses, stops completely, his dick only halfway in her, and she’s never been so annoyed. “Am I hurting you?”

If not for the fact that remembering her name is a struggle with how good he feels inside her right now, Solana would feel a little bad. Would feel guilty for making this man think that anything about how he’s fucking her currently hurts. What hurts is the feel of only a part of his girthy member inside her, teasing her.

“No,” she answers confidently, unsure as to what her goal was in the first damn place. 

“Good.” Solana moans and whimpers as he’s cruelly slow with shifting his hips as he works his way back inside of her. “Then take it, baby.” God, this man is unreal. “You can do it, can’t you, sweetheart? You can take all of me. Just like you did last night.”

Just the memory alone of Roman slamming into her, holding her legs up high and on his shoulders is enough to make her come. To make her finally lose all control and fall to the floor as her orgasm tears through her, hindering her of all autonomous mobility. 

“C’mere.” Once again, she protests when he completely removes himself from her. Solana hates the hollow and empty feeling between her legs. Roman then turns her around, and she gasps as he hikes her on his waist and moves her so that her back is against the wall. 

With one arm supporting her weight, she is both embarrassed and impressed how he manages to position and guide his dick inside her wet, velvety folds. It’s enjoyed and welcomed, but what’s neither of those things is Solana’s thought at him having to hold her up. 

“Ro, I’m—” She bites down on her bottom lip, hands on his shoulder as she rocks into her. “T–too heavy.”

The last thing she wants is this man getting hurt, but the almost insulted expression on his face seems to indicate that’s the last thing on his mind.

Roman’s big hands dig into her hips as he asks with an almost haughtiness. “Do I look weak to you, baby?”

Nothing. Nothing about him screams weak.

And he emphasizes that strength as her head is naturally rocked back against the mirror while  he starts to fuck her from this new position, deeper almost, more intimate. Her breast bouncing against her ribcage from the force of his thrusts. 

Roman groans again, pushing his dick into her, mesmerized by the almost discombobulated expression on her face. He fucking loves how much she loves this. How much she loves the feeling of him inside her almost as much as he loves being inside her. 

“Goddamn, this pussy gripping the shit out of me.” He nips at her neck, hissing as Solana’s short acrylics press into his skin. “Soaking wet and just for me, huh?”

She moans into his shoulder, shaking her head, that stroke of Roman’s ego encouraging him to shift her up higher, this different position just enough to help him find her spot. The evidence in how her whimpers and moans get louder combined with those thick, luscious thighs tightening around him. 

“Love the pretty sounds you make, baby. All fucked out like this on my dick.” Roman is almost certain he could spend the rest of his life fucking his wife and never grow tired, never want to pull out or not experience the majesty of her wet ass pussy. “You gonna let me fuck you like this tonight? Hmm?” It’s a wicked thing to do, Solana thinks to herself. Mean for him to ask her something like that when she’s in no position to deny him. An impossible thing with how good he’s making her feel. “Gonna sit on my face so I can eat that pretty pussy till you’re pushing me away?”

Fuck.

Roman’s filthy talk during intimacy is something she’s certain she’ll never get used to, even if it does make her cunt flutter and throb with need. 

“Y—y–yes, baby.” Because only a fool denies a god. “Oh, shit, right there—”

“Damn straight.” He squeezes her ass, wishing he’d taken her top off. He loves her titties almost as much as he loves her ass and wishes he could have them in his mouth right now. “My sweet girl letting me take care of her.”

And take care of her does he. In every way, especially like this. Always like this. 

Solana holds onto him, clutches him close as he continues to talk her through it. The perfect combination of nice and nasty, tugging and pulling her closer and closer to her limit, to that edge where stars are the only thing she can see as a burst of intense, almost painful pleasure shoots through her, making her hold him even tighter. Roman’s tender voice is in her ear, encouraging her to ride it out, to let him fill her up as his own release arrives over him. 

He’s gentle in the way he   pulls out of her, uncaring of the cum, both his and hers, that saturates his dick. He’s too focused on the excitement at watching it spill down in between her legs and the way she continues to hold him, clearly unable to stand and walk on her own.

Solana lays her forehead against his chest, panting, “that—that was—”

“Always is,” his smart reply is also accurate. Intimacy with her has easily become one of his top three favorite pastimes. Her pussy is fucking addictive. Smirking, he does his best to ignore the fact that he’s still technically semi-hard and could absolutely prop her right back on his dick. Kissing the top of her head, he dances his fingers across her lower back, half-joking, half serious when he suggests, “you should let me stretch you out more often.”

[24carathoney]

Let's Play A Little Game | H.JS | 18+

Pairing: Joshua x FemReader

Wc: 2.2k

Genre: Smut // Established Relationship

Warnings: minors do not interact // f. masterbation // m. masterbation // Joshua watches reader masterbate // unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it) // f. fingering // squirting // creampie // multiple orgasms // overstimulation // use of pet names such as beautiful, love, baby //

Summary: Joshua and reader make a bet.

The rules were simple. The one who cracks first loses. If the both of you weren't so damn determined this game would've been over by now. But no. Neither of you could give up the title of winner. Here you are alone at home, soaking in the bathtub while Joshua was away at a photoshoot. Your mind was racing and the ache between your legs was beginning to be too much. And all of your me time wasn't helping one bit. 

You and Joshua were sitting on the couch in your shared home while he told you about the different bets Mingyu had lost during the tour. 

“He bet Seungcheol he could beat him in a fight?” You cackled, head leaning against the couch as he tried to catch his breath. 

“Yeah he did! It was so funny watching someone as tall as him run away from Seungcheol.”

“Seungcheol is a fucking power house. I'd run away too. I'm not getting hit by him.” Joshua let out another laugh as you scanned over his features, when an idea popped into your head.

“Speaking of bets. I have one in mind. For the two of us.” He arched an eyebrow but gave you his full attention, watching you fiddle with your fingers. “Let's see who can last the longest without sex.” 

“You honestly think you'd win that fight?” His eyebrow remained raised as his hands intertwined behind your back, pulling you closer to his body. You gave an excited nod, rubbing your hands over his clothed chest. 

“Yeah. I think I've grown used to your games. It shouldn't be a problem.”

“Have you? Okay then…..what does the winner get?”

“The loser has to do whatever they say for the next week.” You said and he looked up at the ceiling as if he was contemplating his choices.

“Alright. You got yourself a bet beautiful.” He mumbled against your lips, sealing the deal. 

You let the memory fade as you dragged your hand down into the water, leaning back against the tub. A sigh left your lips as you imagined it to be his fingers instead of your own. You could feel the slick of your arousal between your thighs and that easily let you slip two fingers past your folds. Your head pulled back as you started thrusting your fingers in your entrance, a quiet moan leaving your lips. It felt good, but your fingers were not nearly as thick as his or as skilled. You curled your digits to that gummy spot that could push you over the edge but it wasn't enough. You groaned as you pulled your fingers out, starting to get more frustrated. The two of you made that stupid bet now you're struggling. Why? Because neither you or Josh plays fair. The past couple of days have been nothing but subtle glances, sly touches, and teasing. God the amount of teasing he's put you through. The night before he wanted nothing more than for you to cave. Telling you how beautiful you looked. How badly he wanted to bend you over the counter and take you then and there. 

“Don't you have that photoshoot tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Seungcheol and Jeonghan are gonna be there too.”

“Ah I see the 95 liners having a shoot together. How sweet.” You stated eating out of the cheeto bag in your hands. He nodded but wasn't fully listening as kept his eyes glued to your mouth when you licked the excess cheese dust from your fingers. You thought nothing of it until he grabbed your wrist, bringing a single digit to his lips. You shivered as his warm tongue ran over your finger and you swore you could die a happy woman tight in the kitchen. When he pulled away you stared up at him with wide eyes before he sent you a wink. 

“Come on beautiful, we should head to bed.”

“Hong Jisoo you can't do that to me and expect me to just fall asleep!” You shrieked as he walked away with his head thrown back.

“Trust me. I want nothing more than to fuck you right here in this kitchen. Bent over and on display for me. But I have a bet to win.” 

You sighed as you looked down at your hand, frustrated that you couldn't find the relief you dearly craved. Before Joshua you had no issue getting yourself off. But after Joshua? That man showed you many different ways to explore your body that you never knew existed. You decided to stop sulking and just watch a movie tonight. You grabbed your towel and stepped out, letting the bath drain out as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You scoffed as you went into the bedroom not even realizing Joshua was leaning against the doorframe. You moved to let go of the towel and a loud groan left his throat as it piled up onto the floor at your feet.

“Jesus babe you scared the shit outta me! Announce yourself!” You shouted as his dark gaze scanned you from head to toe. The man wasted no time closing the distance between you, taking your waist into his tight grip. “Shua….” 

“Did you cum?” You shuddered at his blunt question trying not to think about the way his hands are running up and down your sides.

“What?”

“In the bathroom…..you know you're not very quiet.” He smirked down at you and you took your bottom lip between your teeth. He grazed your cheek with one hand as he stepped forward, pushing you backwards till your legs hit the edge of the bed. There he was on his knees above you with dark hungry eyes and you felt yourself getting wetter than you were in the tub. 

“I think I thought of a way for both of us to get off, without losing the bet.” He took off his jacket and hooked a finger over his collar, slightly pulling to open up the top of his shirt. “We can't touch each other but we can touch ourselves. While the other watches.” Your chest grew tight with excitement. You've never had him watch you fuck yourself, be it with a toy or your own fingers. So this new side of your boyfriend definitely sparked something inside you. “Show me.”

“Show you?” You sat confused and he spread your legs apart gently.

“Show me how you were touching that pretty pussy love.” He said in a low voice and you lowered your hand between your legs. You laid back, getting comfortable to give him a better look. He let out a deep groan as your cunt glistened. Shining under the light beaming from the lamp beside the bed. “Look at that. So fucking wet for me.”

You whined when your finger grazed your clit wishing he'd do something. Anything. But he just continued to watch you. You decided to entertain him and arched off the bed when you slipped a finger inside with ease. You started to get hot under his intense gaze. In a sudden need for more, you added a second finger, using your other hand to rub soft circles around your throbbing bud. You couldn't get off before but now? It was something about the way he watched you that sent you to cloud nine. Your eyes fluttered closed as you drove yourself closer to the brink of an orgasm. You jolted in surprise when you felt his breath on your inner thigh, not even hearing him move down your body. 

“Joshua.” A shaky breath left you as he peppered soft kisses along your skin, inching closer and closer to where you needed him most. But that's all he did. His lips never made it home causing you to whine in frustration. 

“Patience baby. *kiss* “Watch me.” *kiss* “Watch you.” *kiss* Every place his lips landed left a warm sensation as you plunged your fingers deeper into your pussy, your palm slapping against your clit. A familiar knot quickly formed in the pit of your stomach as your mouth fell open, the thumping in your ears slowly getting louder. “That's it. Is my pretty girl gonna cum for me?”

“Fuck, I'm gonna cum. Gonna cum for you.” You shook as he dragged his tongue along the skin of your inner thigh. Your body went stiff as your release crashed onto you leaving Joshua in awe. He could never get enough of watching you come undone. It would be a memory he stored for the rest of his life. He ran his hands over your thighs as you came down from you high, not even listening to what he was saying. 

“Did you hear me love?” 

“Hmm?” You had a content smile on your face, feeling his lips on your thighs again. 

“Think you can give me another?” His question finally reached your ears and you shook your head. 

“I can't…” But you could and you would for him. Anytime he asked. 

“Just one more. Let me savor it.” His voice was quiet but loud enough for you to look back up at him. His hand stroked his dick to give himself so relief as his eyes locked onto the way your mouth fell open. Your eyes drifted down to his hips and your tongue darted out to lick your lips as you watched him stroke himself. You wasted no more time to slip two fingers back into your slit. Your thrusts were quick as the sound of your drenched pussy filled the room keeping eye contact with Joshua who kept up with your pace. He could die a happy man watching the way your wetness dripped down your thighs each time your fingers slid back into your cunt. You twitched as he grabbed your wrist, positioning your fingers at a new angle while his hips quickly thrust in his hand.

“Oh” Your world was spinning as your fingers pushed against that sweet spot you tried earlier. But this time it was heavenly. Euphoric even. Your thrusts became erratic and you felt a familiar sensation build in your lower belly. “Joshua I'm gonna…….fuck.”

“Let go for me. Give me all of it.” Joshua had managed to strip out of his pants while you were concentrating on chasing your release for the second time. Joshua was too busy taking a mental screenshot as you bit your lip, eyes shut tight with your brows close together. You couldn't hold back any longer as your second orgasm had you seeing stars. You arched your back off the bed as the splash of liquid left your body, gushing all over the bed and Joshua. The sound of your pussy gushing bounced off of your loud moans as the sheets under you became soaked. You had squirted all over his thighs and lower belly. Your body went limp for a couple of seconds as you sat there to catch your breath. The wet and cold feeling on his skin was enough to make him go feral. 

“Fuck it.” He grabbed the back of your thighs, pushing your legs up as he slipped into you with ease. The sudden intrusion caused you to scream out and grab onto his arms. You swore your eyes rolled to the back of your head as his hips slammed into your ass, his cock hitting your g spot with every thrust. You're going to cum again. The drag of his cock along your walls was beginning to make you lightheaded. You were overstimulated but the pleasure was too good as his hips fucked into you at a rough pace. His hand came up to rest on the curve of your hips and you squealed as his thrusts became relentless, the man above you determined to have you trembling tomorrow. 

“Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck” the word falls from your lips like a chant as your release hits you like a freight train. You arched into him as your body stilled, pushing out your cum like a fountain with enough force to have him slip from your pussy. He watches you drench his cock and thighs and within seconds he was back on you, fucking you through it as your nails dug into his back. The pressure in his stomach was ready to snap and he placed a soft kiss to the back of your ankle before pulling it over his shoulder, hips pistoning into you slow and hard. The fucked out look on your face paired with the way your pussy clamped down on him was enough to tip him over the edge as he gave one last hard thrust. His body stuttered and you felt him shoot his load deep into you. He gave a few more thrusts to ride out his high before grabbing himself by the base and slipping out of you with a squelch. You whined softly as the feeling of his warm cum leaked out of you. He scooped up some of the excess before pushing back into your hole causing you to jolt as he brushed your clit by mistake.

“I guess……” You took a deep breath.  “I win.” Your eyes locked onto his and he gave you a soft smile before taking your lips in a kiss. 

“I guess so.” He smiled as he kissed your shoulder. “What would you like me to do first?”

“Make me dinner?” You asked, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“As you wish.”

[colablue]

theodore nott meeting you headcanons

theodore nott x reader

Theo does not believe in romantic love. (his parent's relationship was not the best example)

He doesn't pay attention to girls in a romantic sense usually only talking to friends like pansy and daphne.

When Theo first sees you, whether that be in the library or class, he feels different. He's not sure if it's because he thinks that you're beautiful or it's something else.

From his lack of romantic experience, he doesn't know how to approach you. So instead of going up to talk to you like a normal person, he chose to blankly stare at you from afar.

This does not come off right, probably because he has an RBF, so you think you did something to make him mad.

Theo, not knowing what else to do goes and asks his friends for advice. This could be a good or bad idea, solely from the fact that his friends don't have the most relationship experience either.

They probably tell Theo to go up and flirt with you a little and then ask you out if he feels like you and him are hitting it off.

This is already a problem for Theo because he can barely communicate, let alone flirt. So he goes with the next best option and takes your friend's seat in a class that you share.

He doesn't say hi or acknowledge you at all he just sits there while you wonder why he changed his seat halfway into the year after glaring at you for weeks on end.

You side-eye him throughout class and he sees that as a positive sign hoping you feel the same for him.

You eventually confront him after a couple days of this and ask him what you did wrong and why he's mad at you.

He's immediately confused, "you didn't do anything wrong".

When you start to question him again he grabs your books and proceeds to walk you to your next class.

You stand in shock for a couple seconds until he turns around and looks at you with a blank stare and gestures towards the direction of your class.

You sigh out of annoyance but you gladly walk side by side with him anyway. He doesn't say anything the whole time but he feels better about talking to you next time.

Maybe he'll be able to say more than a sentence. (probably not)

[pyreo]

I'm comparing the Dungeon Meshi manga to episodes I just watched and now I gotta capital-p Post about this one episode (spoilers past Episode 12)

So this part is an emotional side-step from the central throughline so far - Laios and Marcille got Falin back successfully and reunited, and they got that payoff from the very beginning where they thought it would be impossible. But Chilchuck is very much a part of these layers of development, so after that dragon finally dies, we stop for a second - Laios and Marcille are recovering, Falin has disappeared again - how does Chilchuck feel at that point?

It's the perfect stage to insert that because he didn't really share in that sense of victory in the same way as Laios and Marcille recovering someone extremely close to them. And that's on purpose because he keeps everyone at arms' length. As soon as that arc hits its end and Falin is recovered, there's at last space to ask - why is Chilchuck even here.

He's asking himself that through the chapter. Now that they've lost the person they intended to save, he regrets agreeing to come.

And starts shouldering responsibility for everything ending up this way. We saw that when he got stuck in the mimic room before - he refuses to let himself ask for help, or he'll try to take burdens alone to lessen relying on others. The original Touden Party was six people, and when Laios insisted on going back underground they were two, and he knew they would die, and figured maybe, maybe if they were one more, with his skillset, maybe they'd have a chance. He couldn't let them walk back down just to die.

And he's going back to that mindset - their lives are on me. He thinks he could have prevented this if he'd chosen differently. Essentially, the walk alongside the orc woman is him working through a guilt spiral.

He sees a second chance to correct that mistake of joining the party. He wants them out now, before they die. The orc asks him how they defeated a dragon and, in explaining it, he reminds himself of all the risky, ridiculous things they had to do, and he isn't satisfied with just getting lucky. Laios got his foot bitten off, on purpose! This proves to him that if they go any further they will not survive. And he hints at this dissatisfaction a couple chapters later, wishing his teammates prioritised things other than winning at all costs...

Like, obviously. The point of this chapter is Chilchuck pretending to be a self-serving coward. To the point where others react with disdain, even disgust, towards him because he wants to lie to Marcille and Laios to ensure they turn back. He's desperate to get out of a hopeless situation by any means necessary, and will destroy his standing in the group in a blink if it means nobody else dies. He has to go on a stupid mental health walk for his stupid mental health and talk through his little bout of panic and doubt.

'You called me a coward so don't be surprised when I act accordingly'

He needs someone very blunt to tell him 'dude you're not being a coward for wanting your friends to get out of hell alive. you're a coward for making excuses instead of honestly telling them your concern is genuine' and he BSODs about it. He needs to rant and externalise that frustration over their recklessness at a third party. He needs to scream that they are idiots because he's the only one for which the ends don't justify the means and he can't keep losing his mind over everyone's safety. Down to a point, the orc praises their ability to survive the explosion from the dragon's fuel sac, and it only justifies Chilchuck - Falin didn't even know she could cast the spell that stopped them all being killed, and they cannot continue getting lucky like this.

Anyway. The reason I stopped to think about it was this part-

Where he recovers Laios's monster-infused sword. The thing that made their situation in the dragon fight go from bad to worse, that he swore at Laios for in every language he knew. The most angry we'd seen him. And now he calmly picks it up and praises it for being the only one of them smart enough to make a run for it.

He's projecting, obviously. He's internalising the label of 'coward' and changing himself to fit it. And, look at him, he's so tired of this. It's evidence of his sheer exhaustion that his anger immediately disappears and he actually gives it a compliment. Him and Laios's sword, the group cowards, the only one who agrees with him.

Then, because he had a walk before getting into the argument, he's organised his feelings and drops all the walls and pretense and just says it.

There's a rule of writing where you contrast your high energy sequences with parts that are slow and mundane, to make the difference more apparent. I think that's why I like this bit so much. The fight against the dragon is long, and the emotional stakes are enormous. Right after that we have the bath scene with Falin and Marcille, and Laios ruffling Falin's hair, and this part that pauses everything to explore the stuff that Chilchuck finally needs to say. And it's wrapped in this neat little solemn journey to pick up their supplies and remember how it felt when all five of them had a meal around a real dinner table at last.

And because he doesn't resort to individualistic trickery, because he explains his point as a duty of care rather than pitting himself against the others, he gets backed up. Senshi agrees that they don't have the supplies to continue, and the orc lady mentions her brethren will return later and can give them support, all of which together breaks down Laios's singleminded devotion to his cause.

Personally I think the manga's better suited to comic timing, but in the anime you can get fleshed out little moments, like Laios's face journey as he realises the other three are making a good case for their survival.

This was my favourite part so far, and I like how both Chilchuck-centric episodes have separated him from the others. Because he won't reveal anything he's thinking otherwise. lmao

[wordy-little-witch]

Okay but One Piece being in the pirate era and the lack of a frankly inordinate amount of sea shanties hurts me. Like you know DAMN well Roger was a partier, Buggy and Shanks undoubtedly know an incredible amount of shanties, from their first crews, from the new crews, from exploring and seeing and experiencing the world so thoroughly from such a young age.

Shanks would be the type to belt them, top of his lungs, but always adhere to the Codes, though he does think on it for a moment. People think he'd be a pirate head to toe, through and through, and he is! Truly, he is. He just doesn't really live by the Code and die by the Code the way some of the older generation does.

Buggy, despite popular belief, is the one to cling to those Codes with all he has. It's subtle, in the way he hums certain songs to himself but never sings the full lyrics without Meaning. He will sing and dance and party with his crew, they will make merry but they will do so properly. He's avant garde and nouveau expressionism but he's also old fashioned.

When he finds out Shanks taught this scrawny rubber twink everything the kid knows about piracy through sporadic meetings over a year, nearing a decade ago, he is absolutely livid. The swordsman is stupid but has a decent head on his shoulders for behavior. The redhead, from what he sees, knows more than most. He decides to put class in session.

He's surprised to be beaten so thoroughly and then furthermore to be removed succinctly. He's not gonna let it slide, obviously, but he'll play along. Sure. Could be fun. He was getting bored anyway.

Shit just so happens to hit the fan with this decision and all that follow. Shanks, knowing the truth of things, is simply VERY amused and Buggy is debating fratricide.

He's been playing this role for so long, it feels unnatural to drop it. It feels wrong. It makes him panic, makes him Itch.

It only comes to a head years later as he's humming to himself late in the evening on a certain day in September, having spent a good chunk of the day on his own, away from company and to the surprise of very few. Crocodile and Mihawk are among those who do not know why, but they alone are the ones to look for him.

Finding Buggy, singing softly to an animal as he gently brushes out their fur, surrounded by calm animals who seem to nearly build a wall with their bodies between himself and the world, was not anticipated to either men. Nor was hearing Buggy's voice, usually so shrill and rasped, flow gently over a melody with a grief filled expression. Ritchie, among the ones closest, gently head butted the clown with soulful eyes. Mihawk and Crocodile simply watch, seeing Buggy groom and pamper the creatures within the stables this far from town as he sings a specific sequence of songs.

Mihawk realizes first just what they're witnessing, and he grips the logia user's arm, guiding them both back. Crocodile, startled, goes to ask, and Hawkeyes simply shakes his head sharply. It is only once they are far enough that Mihawk breaths a stunned, "He's performing Rites."

"What?"

"Rites," the swordsman reiterates, sending the other a suspicious look. "The Rites of the Code."

The mafioso takes a drag from his cigar, gesturing for the other to go on.

Mihawk sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I forget," he remarks dryly, "how uneducated in ours ways you are."

"Excuse me-?!"

"Rites," the other interrupts, "are a form of mourning. Frequency varies, and the honoring actions can be altered as well. The constant component are the shanties sung in remembrance and the flags flown. For some, a single instance can be sufficient..." Golden eyes drift to the side, unfocused, as he continues. "For others, there is a need to continue doing so. Often, it is a crew mourning a commanding officer. Unlike Marines, Pirates all share an unspoken connection. Though paths may vary and goals may differ, we all care Her in our veins."

Violet eyes love to the expanse of blue, the horizon bleeding across the world. He knew. He may lack some of the nuance of the Code from his priorities laying further inland, but he knew this. How could he not when his own blood sang salted sprays? He knew this much at the very least.

"So the clown is in mourning."

"Yes."

".... why?"

"...... ....... it is September."

"And?"

"The 28th."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You were there, too, 25 years ago. Loguetown."

Silence falls.

The wind rustles branches overhead. It carries the faintest wisps of a voice. The two men pointedly ignore it and the choked quality it had.

".... I see."

"..... yes. That is my theory, at any rate."

"............. Hawkeye."

"What?"

"He was on the King's crew."

"Yes, this has been established."

"Why?"

"Whatever do you mean?"

"Why him? Why the clown? He's not even 40 yet, so that day... he'd have been, what, 15, at the most? He'd have been on the crew for years by that point. He was there before the man was crowned, after all."

"Shanks was, as well. I believe the earliest mention was when he mentioned an incident from their childhood. He'd said they were... oh, what was it? Seven? Thereabouts. To be on a crew so young..."

"To be there so long, Hawkeye. The brat would have been with them since childhood. That crew was infamous for the things they did - the clown does not fit the pattern."

"He does not boast anything nearing the decorum expected of a fledgling of a King..."

"He knows the Codes, something never mentioned to us nor taught explicitly to his crew that we know of. He served under the King and kept it hidden from the world government for decades. He escaped the Grandline and settled as an East Blue nuisance for years. He was imprisoned in Impel Down with no sea stone."

Golden eyes widen. "You believe he has been hiding more than simply his heritage."

"What makes more sense? This, or what we have thought so far."

"How would we confirm it?"

"Just ask me, maybe?"

Neither man will admit to being startled when a new voice chimes in, soft and hoarse, drowsy. Buggy leans into Ritchie's side as the lion purrs loudly, the clown rubbing his eye.

He continues. "Tomorrow, though. It's late, I'm not feeling well, and Ritch and I have a date with my blanket nest."

"The lion?" / "Blanket nest?"

Buggy giggles softly. "Weighted blankets are expensive. Weighted Ritchies only cost snacks and chin scritches," he remarks softly. "As for the blankets, nests are the way to go. Good night."

Two dark haired men are left by a drowsy clown and lion in the woods on the edge of town with much to thing on and a list to compile for the next day.

The first question? How Mihawk had not sensed him whatsoever on approach.

[xthescarletbitch]

Hey there... I'm terribly angry about something big and outside of my control at the moment. Could you let me know what you'd think the BG3 companions do if Tav started self destructing? Like Tav passing harsher judgments, snapping at neutral NPCs, or fighting more dangerously and recklessly with bad guys?

hiii! i am sorry for the delay, but here is how i think it will go for the bg3 ladies and a tav who is self-destructing. i hope it can bring you a little comfort during this rough time. sending you all the love!

bg3 ladies helping a self-destructing tav (x reader)

sfw, but i still prefer no minors

cw: self-destructing behavior, some tough love, fluff!!

word count: 2000+ (each is roughly 450-550)

tav, who is usually calm and collected, is showing signs of self-destruction. they are speaking differently than usual, taking a riskier approach to confrontations, snapping at innocent bystanders, and fighting more recklessly when in danger. the following baldur’s gate 3 ladies take note of this and decide on how to proceed.

lae'zel

at first, lae’zel doesn’t notice anything wrong. she does notice the change in behavior and attitude but doesn’t necessarily see it as a bad thing. the action that ticks it off for her, however, is witnessing you fighting a bit more recklessly than usual. she admires your tenacity and can sense your anger, but she also senses something more. for her, her anger is not a weakness, but a strength, which is why it takes her a moment. she is not used to seeing that side of you, so she grows a bit concerned.  her first intervention is trying to get between you and your target. it’s not that she doesn’t think you can handle it; she just cannot risk seeing you hurt yourself any more than you already are. she doesn’t even care if you get angry with her, either. she’ll snap back and remind you to stop being so careless. it’s just her way of protecting you. she notices something is really wrong when she sees more out-of-character occurrences from you. she watches you closely with her hand on her blade, just in case you find yourself in trouble. she wonders if staying back and silent is the best course of action when you are going through this, but she ultimately decides to approach you about it. she lets the rest of the party get a bit ahead of you while staying back and walking by your side.  “zhak vo'n'ash duj,” she says softly. “what is the matter?” she’s not versed in any sort of means of comfort, but she does try what she has seen from you and the others. if it were any other githyanki, you may be told to suck it up and carry on… but lae’zel can see you’re hurting, and she wants so badly to protect you from yourself.  as she waits for an answer, she will look around to ensure that the others don’t see before she runs her hand up your back slowly. she understands if you choose not to tell her at that moment, but she still tries to be soft with you about it, especially after trying the tough love approach earlier. she doesn't leave your side until after she sees your expression soften, to which she looks around again and plants a kiss on your forehead. she shares a small smile with you as you continue on your journey.  later, when you’re able to get a moment alone, lae’zel offers to let you fight her to get all your feelings out. battle helps her express how she’s feeling, so she swears that it’ll help you. she’ll go a bit easy on you, letting you get all the hits you need in. she won’t stop until after you’ve called it quits. and afterward, when you’re ready, she’ll take you to a nearby water source to wash up and just talk under the moonlight.  lae’zel won’t be able to rest that night until you’re feeling better. in bed, she’ll offer you some wise githyanki words as she runs her hands up your arms, fully embracing the cuddling session you find yourselves in. she’s come to enjoy it quite a lot, and she hopes that this instance will bring you the comfort she struggles with bringing herself. 

minthara

minthara, with all of her astuteness, notices rather quickly that something is the matter with you. if it’s not by your body language while communicating, it’s by your tone and vocabulary. she takes great pride in knowing you so well that she can pick apart the tiny details about your mannerisms. even with this, she’ll let your actions go on for a little bit because she doesn’t quite see anything wrong in how you’re acting. in fact, she kind of likes it, but also reminds herself it’s temporary and that you will be okay. after all, when she’s feeling overwhelmed, she doesn’t want to be approached about it. so she leaves you alone. however, there comes a point when she knows that you’re getting yourself into a deeper hole, and she just cannot let that happen to you. she’s been there before–at a low point where she’s felt trapped inside her head. minthara can confidently say that it’s a torturous experience, and it’s the last thing she wants for the one she loves. she wants you to feel safe and loved, not miserable and careless. that’s when she’ll start to consider ways to approach you about it and figure out an effective way to care for you. after much consideration, she decides that the best time to question you about your behavior is later that night after everybody has retired to their tents.  you go back to your shared tent, a frustrated look plastered across your face as you enter. the first thing you notice is a few candles placed around your bedroll and minthara sitting on top with some bottles beside her. she opens her legs and pats the floor between them, motioning for you to sit in front of her. you’re puzzled for a moment but comply. if you’re being honest, you’re exhausted from how you’ve been feeling. whatever minthara has planned should be nice, right?  as you sit in front of her, minthara wraps her arms around your front and squeezes your waist. she places kisses behind your neck as she slowly lifts your shirt off of you. once the top is thrown to the side, her hands come off you and you notice she slathers them in some oil. the next thing you feel is her hands squeezing your tense shoulders, rubbing her fingers into your sore muscles at a slow pace. she also places more kisses upon the spots where she feels the most tension. no words are said, just minthara giving you a sensual massage to try and make you feel better. she’s never been good with comforting words, but she will do all she can to help you otherwise. she spends the rest of the night making sure that all the anguish has left your body. this is her way of telling you that she is there for you in mind, body, and spirit. you are hers, and she will take care of you if you let her. 

shadowheart

shadowheart has a lot of experience with self-destruction, but she doesn’t notice your behavior as quickly as she’d have liked. she only notices when you lead the party down a riskier path during a mission rather than taking the safe-and-sure route. she’ll question you about your decision, to which you may or may not snap back at her. no matter what, though, shadowheart will just step back and be quiet based on your response. she doesn’t exactly appreciate your attitude, but she’s been there before, so she tries her best to be understanding of your feelings. it’s not worth making either of you upset over making it a big deal. the thing is, shadowheart won’t just stand back for long. she starts to really dislike where you’re going and decides that enough is enough. she knows the signs and knows the inevitable, and if she can prevent all of the bad, she will. she’ll try to mend what’s hurting. she spares some extra heals for you during fights, ensuring that your condition is okay–that you’re not cursed or afflicted by something she can actually cure. she’ll try to make things easier for you, such as using a cantrip to light up an area that you may not be able to see as well. she’ll even try to ground you at the moment, pointing out beautiful sights during your journey that she hopes may distract you for long enough to get your mind off things.  and she will ask you about what’s going on. when she gets a moment alone with you, she takes you to the side and brings it up. she holds your face in her hands and makes you look her in the eyes. “my love, what is afflicting you?” she very much wants you to spill all the details, but she knows she can’t force them out of you. she understands how much one’s secrets are sacred to them. she only hopes you trust her enough to tell her what’s wrong so that she can help. whether or not you choose to tell, shadowheart will continue her tactics. for the rest of the journey, she keeps her eyes right on you the entire time, eager to keep you out of trouble. whenever you look her way, she’ll flash you a smile and a small wave to remind you that she’s not stopping. and hopefully, later that night, when you’re both ready to slumber, you’ll allow her to hold you close and help chase those inner demons away. having your company has certainly helped her with her own struggles, and she wants to do the same for you.

karlach

the precious karlach knows you all too well and notices almost immediately when something is wrong. witnessing you snap at a neutral npc leaves her puzzled because it is just so unlike you. it is at this point that she vows to try and make things better for you before they get worse (she couldn’t stand to see it get worse, anyway). so she’ll place a hand on your shoulder when witnessing the odd behavior, waiting for you to turn around and face her.  “you alright, soldier?” she asks, with those puppy dog eyes.  you can see that she’s worried about you, but you just feel too far gone. you nod and smile, hiding your pain–you don’t feel like dragging her down with you, let alone risking going off on her, too. it’s better that you keep your distance, and that’s something she senses. she takes her hand off of you and backs up, paying close attention to you as you continue your journey. karlach continues to think of ways to help you, and especially ways that you’ll let her help you.  every time you meet her gaze, karlach sends you loving glances despite your snapping. she just wants to show you that you are still loved despite these low points and that she is here to help you. if you stare at her long enough, she’ll even blow you a kiss. you’d be lying if you said her persistence wasn’t helping you, but you were still hurting. at some point, everybody in the party is talking about taking a short rest. you don’t want to, but you can’t stand to hear them ask about it anymore, or you’ll be snapping at them, too. thankfully, you’re not too far from a decent spot to allow some relaxation.  once you get there, you notice karlach is a bit giddier than usual. your other companions take their belongings and sit themselves around a fire while karlach grabs hold of your hand and lifts it to her lips to kiss it. you’re surprised that your behavior hasn’t scared her off yet but also touched that she’s so dedicated. “let’s go for a walk,” she suggests, leading you toward a trail surrounded by trees. you have no choice but to oblige. karlach continues to hold your hand as you walk through the wooded area, being sure not to speed too far ahead of you. she turns to you every so often and smiles at you when she makes eye contact. she’s really trying to make it better.  you finally stop at a spot where the trees line up in a way that allows light to pass through a single spot, highlighting the path in front of you. karlach goes ahead a bit to set up a little picnic, ushering you over. she shows you some berries that she’s managed to pick when you weren’t looking, offering to feed them to you herself. she spends the rest of the time showering you in love, not quite wanting to initiate a conversation about what’s been going on, but makes it known that she’s there regardless, whenever you’re ready to talk about it. 

[bellewintersroe]

enemies to lovers headcanons with nix, winters, speirs and liebgott pls 🥺? (love ur writing btw)

thank you!!!!!! I love this request omfg hehehe and I’m so excited to write it, I hope this does your idea justice 🥰🥰

Easy Boys x Reader ~ Enemies to Lovers.

Ron Speirs:

I wrote something here but I accidentally deleted it and now I can’t remember but oh well. I think something along the lines of the fact he’s superrrr intimidating to you at first.

lets say you’re a pretty friendly person, you’d think he was super standoffish and maybe a bit arrogant? Idk it’s a weird take but let’s go with it.

anyway you don’t really talk, but when Ron starts to notice you more often (he always notices you the whole time) he can tell you don’t like him or something.

idk but one day when he’s just like oddly nice to you, like overly nice you suddenly feel bad and after months (or years) of avoiding the man you feel a pang of guilt.

he’d probs offer you some cigarettes or his coat or something whilst it’s raining in Germany.

the small gestures when Ron is finally relaxing towards the end of the war become more common and you decide you actually never hated him at all, you just completely misread him.

lets be honest you’re probs still intimidated asf by him, like the first time you two are walking alone just one on one it’s nerve wracking.

hes a lot more gentle? And soft spoken that you ever realised, like you’re just discussing something and you’re actually taken a back at how nice his voice is? That sounds odd, but then you look up to him and you kinda share a smile and that’s the exact moment when you can pin point the feelings between you both.

“you know I used to be scared of you.” You’d admit to him after a night of drinking in the eagles nest.

ron would just smile and legit just KISS YOU?!?

“uh did you mean to do that?”

“yeah…. Did you not… like it?”

you’re kissing again and suddenly the idea of somewhat disliking each other seems so stupid, Ron was there the whole time, yet only now did your relationship blossom into something so sweet and beautiful.

Joe Liebgott:

The most PERFECT example of enemies to lovers ever fr.

like you thing he’s smug and arrogant and he likes to tease you, like he says ur hot when your angry but then you snap back and he thinks ur a bitch and then the two of you avoid one another like the plague.

if you’re all sat in the same group you can guarantee he’ll throw some snarky comment your way and you’d hit one right back at him.

“Drop the attitude doll, just cos you’re hot.”

Backhanded compliments? Sometimes they’re kinda confusing but they’re reoccurring from entering Europe, it’s like Joe can’t actually be mean?

idk but you two will bicker and even when the feelings of hatred and despair begin to fizzle ever so slightly you still keep up to the image of disliking one another.

“I hate you.” But side eyes to watch the other persons response u know??

the thing is, you match each others personalities perfectly. Like you’re both feisty asf.

it’s one day that you’re a little downbeat and Joe decides he wants to make a snarky comment to you (to get your attention/ watch your reaction) that his heart legit drops out his asshole when he sees you cry.

like he actually make you cry. Fuck! It’s gone way too far and some of the boys are like; “oh way’da go, liebgott!”

He feels super, super bad, but just thinks you fully despise him now so he avoids apologising to you. In reality you’re more upset because something clicks that you don’t hate him, at all- so when he made a comment on a particularly rough day it bothers you in a different way than usual.

Has it clicked that the two of you like each other yet?? Idk idk.

anyway I can imagine one day Cobb makes some rude ass comment to you, and just as you’re about to open your mouth to spit something back at him, Liebgott interjects, feeling some form of anger like no other.

“Hey, watch your fuckin’ mouth, Cobb. Why don’t ya back the fuck off?”

it catches you both off guard like uhhhh- do you acknowledge that Liebgott just publicly defended you?? It shut Cobb up, so when Joe is satisfied and a little nervous with his work, he leaves.

idk I just feel like it would make you wanna chase after him and when you thank him he’s super relaxed and just… open?? Finally, there’s no facade that the two of you dislike each other, not remotely.

the conversations start up properly, like for some reason Joe would be nervous around you, he’d be so calm and speak so softly you’d tease him like is that the same person?!?

teasing each other like crazy becomes more of a playful/ flirtatious thing and neither of you can deny it.

“you know doll, maybe you never considered the fact you’ve actually been in love with me this whole time.”

“maybe I have.” “What??” “What?!”

let’s just say the feisty nature between the two of you is shifted into the bedroom… maybe all the tension of ‘hating’ one another paid off?

Lewis Nixon:

Honestly I’m struggling to think of scenarios for Lewis and Dick because they’re you’re superiors, like both of them are extremely respectful and professional men, I’m not quite sure how you’d end up becoming enemies?? For the sake of the fact it’s fiction, let’s just make something wild up.

so maybe bcs Lew is a big drinker and you’ve warned him time and time again to cut it out, you get so annoyed at him you just snap? Like you’re a little impatient with him, but he’s also not really giving you, the company nurse, but regard in return.

lewis would probs sign and roll his eyes and just walk away and it’s kinda awkward asf, and let’s say you’re shy, you just kinda avoid him like crazy.

so there’s more of a tension between the two of you, like you sigh every time you see him with an alcohol bottle, talking about his rich upbringing. Even tho Lew is extremely modest and doesn’t brag, maybe you just get the wrong end of the stick/ misunderstand? Idk people are complicated.

I feel like even tho it’s awkward you two would end up alone somehow? Like you’re stood waiting and you’re kinda forced to talk.

“Look I know you hate me and all-”

“I don't hate you, Captain Nixon.”

The interactions kinda pick up after he’s divorced, like you end up helping him with an injury he gained after a night of boozing. You don’t lecture him but you’re a lot more patient and understanding.

and uhhhh this does something to him. Like he’s confused, whys he feeling all these feelings towards a lady he’s barely interacted with?

oooo one day the tension between you guys would become too much and he’d kiss you and you’re both like wtfff- but it feels so good and so right so you just continue.

You two become masters of having a secret relationship and when the others find out it’s super unexpected and everybody’s a little baffled cos they figured the two of you hated one another??

It makes a good story to tell the grandkids, let me tell you that.

Dick Winters:

Ummmm this guy, yeah I’ve struggled to think of a scenario where he’d ever be anybody’s enemy (apart from the Germans obvs). But personally, he’s too respected, too calm and gentlemen like for you to be his enemy.

in this case maybe it’s more of a ‘we once had a thing but he stopped it and now I'm upset at him’.

like before you get serious, Dick has to stop the relationship because he knows it interferes with fraternising rules. Working together and being in a relationship would never ever ever work. The army forbids it.

it sucks and because he’s such a nice guy that sucks even more, like you can’t even look at him without wanting to cry, so you just completely blank him and try to push him away as far as humanely possible. Considering the circumstances you’re under, this isn’t very easy, nor is it very achievable.

dick always keeps an eye out for you, even though you don’t notice, he’s always asking others if you’re okay and if you’re taking care of yourself.

ofc there’s bigger things to worry about than your relationship ending, so the two of you would probably end up being completely professional with any interactions you have.

ouch it hurts both of you, but neither of you know it’s a mutual feeling? The longing for one another is so painful considering Dick thinks you hate his guts.

after the war is over and you leave the army, only then does Dick call you up one day and tells you everything.

like he wastes no time, trust me, and you’re in complete shock, because this man who became a total stranger to you is practically telling you he loves you?!??

ugh ofc you feel the same and the relationship back to lovers kinda begins to there.

But fr Dick Winters ending a relationship with you is legit your arc to become a villian- it’s no surprise you go a little crazy when he had to end things.

all you can say now is how glad you are things actually worked between you both, and be enthralled by the fact Dick practically waited for you the whole 3 years he knows you.

[imraespace]

LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE ─

─ WITH RIN ITOSHI !!

━ 9:29 AM

After your cake giving, homeroom had ended, and now it's first period, Art.

Art is an okay subject for you, you actually enjoy it.

Though, today's class is a bit different than the others.

Today, the teacher gave a project. Group project! Your mood visually fell when you heard those words.

After the wave of annoyed groans, the teacher explained everything to the class. It was a duo project where both partners have to come together and create a poster based of one thing they like. It has to include calligraphy, as it's the current main topic in class.

A duo.. but there's three of you, Meguru, Yoichi and yourself.

As if on cue, you three share a look then back at the teacher. The teacher already made the pairs, which caused a gloom cloud over the class.

Though, as if the teacher loves your friends, they got in pairs, both Meguru and Yoichi. Though, is she on your side as well? The name Rin Itoshi shocked you to the core.

You're sharing a project with him..

Your eyes made their way to him, on the outside it looked like he wasn't one bit fazed but how does he feel on the inside?

The class got in their pairs and that's how you, Y/N L/N, sat next to Rin Itoshi for a whole period.

━ 12:39 PM

Rin left the class, without giving you any info, on where and when to meet up. He didn't really look pleased about the project either way.

At the end of the class, the groups got together and already started planning, which left you and Rin behind. Normally, you always do your schoolwork late but in past school projects, you do the work first and then leave the rest for the others. But right now you can't do anything if your partner isn't here.

But thank goodness, you know where your partner always disappears to. So with that thought, you made your way to the field.

This time around, normally the whole team is present at the field but it seems that this lunch is different. Some stuck around but there he is, practicing alone.

You stood by the benches for a while, staring at his figure, you didn't feel the need to break him out of his zone.

Your mind then wandered, thinking about the project. What's his favorite thing? Will it work out with yours? Everyone knows you love sweets, what will he choose?

Nevermind, too deep into your thoughts, you fail to notice that he had made his way towards you a while ago. His shoes are now in your field of vision and slowly, you looked up and was greeted with his face.

You didn't say a word, just stood up. He stared at you for a bit, wondering why you were here. Then it hit him and he sighed.

"If you're here because of the project, we can do it later." HE simply stated.

You nodded at his words, but there's little information given in there.

"But.. we can at least plan a time and where to meet up.." You mumbled as he was collecting his water.

He sat himself on the bench, drinking his water while taking in your words.

"We can meet up after school and you can choose a place to go."

You sat back on the bench, nowhere close to him though. You thought about his words. Where to meet up?

The pros and cons of this are back at your place, you have everything you need, thanks to Reo but what if he also has them at his place? The cons are that you have your roommates and he has his snack-stealing brother..

"I don't mind if we go to my place.." You muttered. He stole a glance at you and then muttered a small okay. Then it was quiet again.

He was the first to break it, standing back up to resume his practice.

"I will see you at hometime then." He ended, walking back onto the field.

"Okay.." You said, yet he wasn't there to hear you.

You had yet to leave, still on the bench and your eyes followed his every move. He noticed it, wondering why you were still here but he threw it in the back of his mind, focusing on the ball.

Slowly, the idea of spending time with Rin is hitting your brain. You can't even sit next to him yet you're gonna spend time with him alone? Wow..

You sighed, standing up, and decided to head to the library for some help on this project. Without you knowing, his eyes followed you, wondering what you were gonna do in the library.

Then he stopped himself and sighed. He's supposed to be practicing right now, not wanting your eyes on him for some reason.

━ 4:00 PM

The final bell rang, signaling that school was over.

"Did you get to speak to your partner?" Meguru asked, poking your back.

Yoichi turned to see what your response would be. However, before you could, said partner had made his way toward your table.

"Let's go and get it over with." He simply stated, ignoring your friends beside you.

Wow, so demanding.. It's making you blush a bit. You nodded at his words, scrambling to collect your books to pack them away in your bag. After a while, you stood up, looking at the boy before you. He nodded and began walking, with you trailing behind.

You left your friends alone, staring at each other with a confused look.

"Wasn't he a bit.. bold.." Yoichi muttered.

Meguru nodded.

"And the way she acted.. If it was me she would've.."

Yoichi just patted his back.

"It's okay, let's just go."

.

.

.

Rin walked in front, while you were in the back. It's not that you wanted to be left behind, well you don't mind it because it's a great view you get but it's simply because he's literally 6 feet tall.

The more you stared at him, the more you realized that you barely knew anything about the boy, you literally don't even know his age.

Maybe this project can change all of that. It lasts for five days anyways.

Slowly, you sped up a bit to catch up a bit, but it was no use..

Sighing, you accepted the fact that compared to him you're short and decided to stay in the back for the long walk home.

.

.

.

Outside the school building, he stopped in his tracks and turned to face you, which caught you off guard.

"I don't know the place to your home." He muttered.

Oh yeah.. Wait, walk home..

You scanned the area and saw your roommates, waiting by the school gate for you.

Rin noticed the shift in your emotions and turned his head in the direction you were looking in.

"Hold on for a minute.." You mumbled, running away from the boy.

Your roommate, Reo, eyes landed on your figure which he thought that you were here for them, and began walking away with Seishiro mindlessly walking behind him.

"WAIT! Dang.." You called out, making the boys stop in their tracks.

"What?" Reo asked, turning around to face you.

You let out the breath you were holding in and began talking.

"I have an Art project to complete-"

"Same." Seishiro stated.

"..Okay and it's a group project-"

"Oh, we have one as well, we're partners," Reo said.

You rolled your eyes at the idea of them interrupting you and the fact that not only Yoichi and Meguru got each other but your roommates have each other. What next, Hyoma has Kunigami? You don't even know Kunigami but y'know..

Anyways, you gave them a look to zip it and they obeyed.

"I'm gonna walk home with my partner, so you guys are alone today." You ended.

They stared at each other for a bit then nodded and left. You sighed, turning around to collect Rin but saw that he was already making his way towards you.

"I'm ready now." You said. He acknowledged your words and you led the way to your home, leaving the fact that those boys were your roommates and told him absolutely nothing.

━ 4:20 PM

The walk wasn't that long and it wasn't uncomfortable either. You snacked on some chocolate you had in your bag on the way there but finally, you arrived.

You both made your way up to the apartment room, Rin's eyes staring at the decoration around the building. No surprise, the apartment you there live in is indeed big in size, you live with Reo Mikage.

Though, in Rin's mind, he wonders what your parents do for a living. He has something mixed up.

Finally, you made it to the door and were about to open it until you heard noises inside, which you silently slapped yourself for not warning Rin.

"I literally forgot about them.." You mumbled.

"Who? You're parents?"

"Parents?" You thought out loud, turning to face Rin.

Now he was confused.

"Huh?" He asked.

Before you could turn the door knob, Reo did for you, guess you both weren't very soft in volume..

"You're here- HE'S YOUR PARTNER?" Reo asked out loudly.

You motioned for him to quiet down, placing your finger to your lips and making a "shh" noise.

"Doesn't Sei stop at the arcade I thought you both wouldn't be home right now." You muttered.

"Well, we have our own project, remember?" He said, opening the door wider.

You turned to face Rin, motioning for him to enter first, and slowly he did. I guess he wasn't expecting them..

You entered your home and realized that they already took the living room..

"DON'T YOU BOTH HAVE YOUR ROOMS TO CHOOSE?" You asked out loudly this time.

"It's closer to the kitchen," Seishiro mumbled, playing whatever game was connected to the TV screen. At least there are books on the coffee table but they aren't really taking this project planning well huh.

You sighed, realizing that you have to take your CRUSH to your room.

Reo shrugged his shoulder at you then made his way back onto the couch.

You rolled your eyes, making your way towards your room with loud thuds, with Rin following quietly behind.

.

.

You made it to your door, mentally checking to remember if your room is messy or not. You sighed, slowly opening the door, and were greeted with your room, thankfully it wasn't as messy as you thought it would be. Just a semi-unmade bed and a few textbooks that rests on your desk where your laptop rest on, thats all.

You walked in as he followed and you closed the door. He sat on your bed, taking a look around your bedroom, admiring whatever posters and decorations you had up.

You weren't expecting to be locked up in your room with him, which is why your confidence went down a bit and you might explode but let's play it cool!

You pulled the chair from your desk up closer to the boy, got a spare book and pen and started off the session.

You stared at your floor, clicking the top of the pen as you thought of what questions you can ask him.

"Um.. well to be honest, before we could talk about our favorite things, we barely even know each other.." You softly pointed out.

He hummed at your words, staring at the blank page on your lap.

"Okay I guess, ask me anything then." He said.

Your face burned up at the given access he gave you. You can ask him anything..

"Okay.. let's start off simple, how old are you?" You asked.

He blinked at your words.

"You don't know how old I am?"

Okay, now you're embarrassed.

"Am I supposed to?"

He scratched his head at your question, gazing away from your eyes.

"Well yeah.. I already know yours.. you're 17 right?" He answered.

Now you're scratching your head and gazing away.

"Yeah I am.." You muttered.

He turned to look back at you and answered your previous question.

"I'm 16."

"YOU'RE WHAT?"

"Is that wrong?"

"NO.. no it's not.. I just thought you would've been older than me or at least my age.." You softly said.

He shrugged at your reaction.

"Whatever I guess, do you want me to ask you a question?" He asked and you nodded.

He began to wonder.

"What's your hobby?"

"Hobby?"

He nodded. You never really had one, before this random change in your emotions to do something, you didn't really do anything.

And Rin found that off based on your reaction he got.

"..So you don't have one?" He asked.

You stared at the ground, realizing how boring you were.

"Uhm.. I guess, baking..?" You thought out loud.

"You guess?" He asked.

You nodded.

"I mean, growing up that's what I always learned to do.." You explained.

"Not to judge, but I always thought you just slept." He confessed.

"Oh, I do!" You exclaimed.

And he raised his eyebrow at your words.

"So your hobby isn't baking?"

"I don't know, I haven't really thought of a hobby."

"You need to think of a hobby..?"

Okay, now you're just embarrassing yourself. Your view of a normal life is quite different from others. The more you learn you guess..

"Okay um, what's something you love? That we can use for the project." You said.

Rin realized that you want to drop the past topic and he did just that, thankfully.

"Horror."

"Hor-what..?" You blankly asked.

"Horror." He said, seriously this time.

You stared at him for a while, then wrote it down.

"Okay.." You mumbled.

"What about you?" He asked, completely not noticing the problem that he caused.

"Oh um.. Sweets."

"Sweets?"

"Sweets." You said, seriously this time!

You both had a mini staring contest at this time.

You both realized how different you were at that point.

You broke the mini staring contest, looking down at your book. You then decided to keep the fact that you hate horror to yourself, just for the sake of this project.

You thought of ways on how to actually start the project and blurted them out.

"Okay horror.. we can watch your favorite horror movie for inspiration." You muttered.

At least on Rin's side, he completely agreed to that.

"What about you? What's your favorite sweet or candy..?" He softly asked.

You blinked at his words, your favorite dessert, it's one you haven't eaten in a really long time, one your mother always made for you.

"My favorite dessert.. is Bavarian Cream, but I don't wanna make it." You mumbled.

"Oh.. Okay, then choose another one."

"Okay, um.." You muttered, there's a lot to choose.

The boy sighed then suggested something fun.

"Tomorrow, we can visit candy shops or look around for desserts."

"We can!" You exclaimed, writing it down.

Unconsciously, Rin had a small smile on his face after seeing your reaction, then stopped himself when he caught on.

## LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE. --

╴“ WITH RIN ITOSHI?? „

ฅ^._.^ฅ : some things about y/n !! she mostly sleeps through the day, only does stuff IF needed !! with her given gift of being effortlessly smart , all she does in her free time is : nap , eat , sleep. hmm what if.. one day y/n develops a crush and now has to ACTUALLY work to achieve a goal ? : date rin itoshi !!

15 // 17

note: when i first found out im the same age as rin i was shocked BC IDK HE DOESNT SEEM LIKE A 16 YO BC hes so seeerious yk ALSO IM 7 MONTHS OLDER THAN HIM? anyways omg hehe new arc

TAGLIST:@deezy12299 @kuroronana @khoiyyu @swagkittybear @shidousprincess @starbarfbunni @jealovsie @imtiredmf @hainge (OPEN)

! if you didn't get tag, that means your acc didn't show up :(

-`♥︎´- for this story, i'm trying something new, which includes words/phrases, foods and hometowns from japan and germany. if there's any errors please point it out !

-`♥︎´- word count : 2.5K

[moonybug444]

(sorry for my bad english!) hii! I found your account and i want to tell you that your stories are, like, a GREAT comfort, the few you have are, it sounds weird but, in my opinion reading stories (or writing) about abusive relationships is an escape route to avoid falling into those relationships in real life, I mean, i read them and i get the adrenaline because of reading it instead of living them dhfjkshfsk so yes, they are also very, very well written <:

can i ask for a story where Connie is a little older thanreader, and constantly manipulates her with the excuse that he knows better and reader believes him, because, for a long time, he was the only older figure she had, something like that, I don't know. , bonus if reader cries hysterically in his arms (his fault, of course, he slapped her or something)

i really agree with your take on the whole writing about traumatic relationships because that’s how i feel. i’ve been thru so so much and i know it’s different but this is most definitely how i cope, im glad someone else can relate to me especially during these times i’ve felt so alone💗 you english is beautiful by the way, thank you 😊

tw: grooming - reader was 17 when she meant 24 year old connie / mental abuse / physical abuse - from connie and from readers dad / very mean and manipulative? connie / unestablished relationships / not proofread

such a baby

——————————————————————————————————

“really thought you were over that stupid shit y’know, (name)?” he looks down at you, sitting on the floor at the foot of the bed and spits, “you’re still just a fucking kid.”

he hates it when you cry. you know he does, he knows he does, so you don’t know why it feels like him making it happen is always his main goal.

you sit there silently looking up at him as he scrolls on his phone. after a couple minutes he puts it down and looks down at you.

“you’re gonna have to find a place to go.” your eyes widen all the more and you feel your heart beat quicken. it scares you when he says stuff like that. find a place to stay? where could you possibly go? you feel like you’ve been with connie so long, he’s taken care of you for so long…

“w-what?” you get up suddenly, trying to ease your way into his lap. you’re get even more nervous even harder when he meanly pushes you away, you pretty eyes water.

“c-connie..! hic wh-what— how will i—?” you can’t even finish your sentence you’re so shaken. you really can’t help it, you can’t imagine any life without connie. how could you? he’s the one that took you in, he’s the one that knows exactly what to do when you don’t, he tells you what to do when you’re just about to make the wrong choice. he’s shown you what love is when nobody else could.

while you’re breaking down crying you can tell connie’s losing his patience by the second, he’s getting up waving his hands all type of ways getting all in your face, yelling all types of nonsense.

“dammit (name), shut the fuck up, y’know i hate that crybaby shit, go fix yourself before i do it for you” when you don’t shut up he doesn’t give you a second warning, just slaps you clean across your face. you damn near fly across the room from the impact, connie’s just so much stronger than you.

“—oww ..!” your body shakes as you try to lift yourself up, your crying even harder now. “y-you’re a liar…! you said—you said hic you were d-done hitting me—!”

he stomps over to you, eyes wide and mad while he starts dragging you by your little arm to the front door, “who the fuck do you think your talking to?! i don’t owe you shit you know that, little girl?!”

connie goes to open the front door, “i’m fucking tired, (name) i’ll sleep like a fucking baby without your fucking crying tonight—”

when you don’t stop he freaks out a little more. he hates when you don’t listen.

“think i fucking won’t?” he gets louder, “think i won’t put you out this fucking house, right now?! i don’t give a fuck what time it is—!”

connie drags you back to your shared bedroom and starts ripping your clothes out wherever he can find them and putting them in so random bags, while you cry and hyperventilate. he doesn’t give one fuck, to him you deserve this shit. you’re always running your mouth.

“who got you all this shit, huh?!” he moves on to the vanity and starts packing all your cute little jewelry, breaking some in the process.

he stops for a second and just looks down at you. veins popping out of his neck as he screams, with the bag he’s stuffing all your belonging in tightly gripped in his hand and that mean look of sternness in his eyes, you realize just how how much older connie really is. just how scary he is. with him being 7 years older than you and all, you’ve always put connie on the high horse, always seen it as a flex. but you don’t think you’ve ever really seen it until now. how truly scary he can be.

“you wanna go back, (name)?” he takes a deep breath. “you wanna go back to that shit everyday? living in that fucking house, getting treated like some fucking shit?”

you sob when he finally lets go of your now bruised arm. he goes to sit on the bed.

you were 17 and connie had just turned 24. it was late out when you ran away from home. you were sick of it. your dad was terrible to you, all the yelling and screaming and the bruises—you couldn’t take it anymore. connie was one of your friends older cousin, you had meant him at her birthday party and you think you fell in love. he just seemed so…mature. at the end of the night when he saw you all alone, he went up to you and asked if you were alright. turns out your dad was pissed so he didn’t pick you up. connie couldn’t be more excited to hear that shit. cute little shy teenager, and she’s got daddy issues? he hit the jackpot. he ended up taking you home and giving you his number, in case you ever, “needed anything.”

you’d call connie whenever, no matter what. he always knew exactly what to say.

one night your dad blacked your eye and you called connie. connie showed up 8 minutes later and came barging in, beating the shit out of your dad. that was the last night you heard from your dad and the last night you ever weren’t by connie’s side. you’ve been living with him ever since. you’ll never forget that first night he held you in his bed. he whispered about how everything would be ok and how much he’d take care of you. and you believed it.

it’s been only 2 years since then and connie’s still that ever so cool senior that you look up to. you love connie to death and you don’t think you ever won’t. he knows you’re completely dependent on him now too, he thinks he'll always use it to his advantage.

“you’re such a baby.” you look up at him and he nearly melts, he wants to fucking ruin you. you eyes are all glossy and swollen from crying, your lips are stilly wobbly from the wailing, and your tears—don’t even get him started on the fucking tears.

connie thinks about how perfect you are.. you’re already as naive as you could possibly be, but the age gap just puts it more in his favor.

you look in his eyes to see if that gaze is still there…you know, the loving one even after everything, and it is.

“i love you….” you whisper it like it’s a curse, anxious for his answer.

connie smiles and kisses your forehead watching you light right back up just from the small gesture.

“i know you do.”

[onlinesuzie]

we need part 2 on hamzah x love island!

☆ hamzah vs. watching love island pt.2 ☆

words: 3.8k

summary: Hamzah had finally agreed to watch Love Island with you, Mandy and Martin. However, all night Hamzah couldn't keep his thoughts to himself and with the offer to take you home for the night, his desperation for you couldn't be contained, now you were both alone together.

notes: I HAD S00000 MANY DIFFERENT IDEAS FOR HOW THIS COULD HAVE WENT. i wanted to try writing a hamzah as more confident and the reader more nervous than i had in past fics so i hope that you guys love it!!

♡

The living room was alive with excitement as you, Mandy and Martin settled in for another night of binge-watching Love Island. The table was covered with an assortment of snacks—popcorn, chips, and a variety of dips—while drinks were scattered around, waiting to be poured. You checked your phone for what felt like the hundredth time, your anticipation was extremely evident.

Mandy was busy setting up the first episode on the TV, glancing over her shoulder at you. “Are you waiting for Hamzah to show up or something?” she teased, a playful smile on her face.

Martin chimed in, chuckling. “Yeah, you keep checking your phone. Should we expect someone much cooler?”

You shrugged, trying to play it cool. “Just making sure I didn’t miss any messages,” you replied, hoping to deflect their curiosity.

Mandy raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “Come on, it’s totally fine if you’re waiting for him.”

You laughed, but inside you felt a flutter of anxiety. Little did they know that you and Hamzah had shared a kiss in the kitchen during their last visit. The memory lingered in your mind, adding a layer of tension to the otherwise lighthearted atmosphere.

“Honestly, it’s nothing,” you insisted, trying to sound casual as you tucked your phone away. “Just excited to get started.”

Martin shook his head with a grin. “Alright, alright. But if he does show up, can you tell him that he’s extremely late and he can’t be rude!”

You smiled, thankful for their lighthearted teasing, but the thought of Hamzah’s possible arrival sent your heart racing with nerves. As the opening credits of Love Island began to roll, the atmosphere in the room was filled with the excitement of Mandy and Martin, who were eagerly discussing the new bombshells introduced last weekend. You felt so nervous as you kept glancing at your phone, waiting for Hamzah to arrive.

Just then, the doorbell rang, sending your heart racing. You jumped up from the couch, a giddy smile spreading across your face. You opened the door to find Hamzah standing there, his familiar warm smile making your heart flutter.

Before you could say anything, he stepped forward and leaned in, kissing you softly. You melted into the moment, but the reality of your friends just a few feet away hit you. You pulled away quickly, glancing back toward the living room with panic. “Hamzah, oh my god! They might see us!”

He chuckled softly, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “Why not? It’s just a kiss.”

“Yeah, but it’s not just a kiss with you!” you whispered urgently, trying to keep your voice down. “Mandy and Martin are right there!”

With a playful grin, Hamzah followed you as you instinctively led him further into the house. “Come on, let’s go to the couch,” you said, feeling a rush of adrenaline as you dragged him along.

“Alright, alright,” he replied, his smile widening as he followed you. “But just so you know, I wouldn��t mind another kiss”

You shot him a teasing glare, your heart racing with a hint of embarrassment as you settled back onto the couch. You hoped Mandy and Martin hadn’t seen anything, even as you both struggled to contain your smiles.

As the opening scenes of the episode played out, you felt a wave of comfort wash over you. To add to the cozy atmosphere, you grabbed the soft blanket draped over the back of the couch and pulled it over yourself and Hamzah, wrapping it around the two of you.

Mandy and Martin were fully engaged in the show, their slight bickering providing a constant sound which distracted them from the tension between you two, your attention focused on Hamzah. The warmth of the blanket and his presence made you feel at ease, and you couldn’t help but sneak looks at him.

As you settled in, you felt Hamzah’s hand slip beneath the blanket and rest gently on your thigh. You turned to him, meeting his gaze, and he smiled softly, his fingers giving a gentle squeeze.

“Comfortable?” he whispered, leaning in a little closer.

“Mhm,” you replied, your heart racing at the intimacy.

Mandy and Martin were oblivious, wrapped up in the unfolding drama on-screen, laughing and arguing over the islanders. But beneath the blanket, Hamzah was drawing circles on your thigh.

You felt giddy as you settled into the warmth of the blanket, leaning just a bit closer to Hamzah, savoring the feeling of his hand resting on you. It was an innocent gesture, but the underlying tension between you two added a thrill to the evening.

A moment later, Martin leaned over to Mandy and whispered something that made her giggle quietly. You caught snippets of their conversation, the way they exchanged mischievous glances made you nervous.

“Should we?” Mandy asked, her eyes sparkling with a playful secret.

“Definitely,” Martin replied, his voice barely above a whisper. “Let’s go.”

They turned to you and Hamzah with playful grins. “We’re heading to the kitchen to grab more food!” Mandy announced, her tone light and teasing.

You watched as they both stood up, making their way toward the kitchen. As they walked away, Mandy glanced back over her shoulder, her eyes darting between you and Hamzah with a knowing smile. Your heart raced slightly at their teasing and the warmth of Hamzah’s hand still resting on your thigh beneath the blanket.

Once they were out of sight, the atmosphere shifted subtly. Hamzah turned to you, a cheeky glint in his eye. He squeezed your thigh gently, and the unexpected touch made you swallow harshly.

“Guess it’s just us now,” he said, his voice low and teasing, a smile playing on his lips.

You met his gaze, feeling flustered at his playful assertion. “Yeah, it looks like it,” you replied, heart racing.

Hamzah continued to hold your gaze. The world outside faded away as the connection between you two deepened, every second feeling charged with excitement.

As you both shared the moment, the air between you felt tense. Hamzah leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “You look really good tonight.”

A rush of warmth flooded through you, and you felt your cheeks flush at his words. The compliment sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach, and you struggled to suppress a smile. “Thank you,” you managed to reply, your voice still quiet.

But just as quickly as the warmth enveloped you, a wave of worry crept in. What if Mandy and Martin could hear? You glanced over your shoulder toward the kitchen, half-expecting to see them peeking in, which only intensified your flustered state.

Hamzah must have noticed your reaction because he chuckled softly, leaning back slightly to catch your eye. “Hey, don’t worry. They’re too busy with whatever they are talking about to pay attention to us,” he assured you, his voice low and soothing.

You bit your lip, still feeling the heat in your cheeks. “I just don’t want them to hear us,” you confessed, glancing back nervously.

Hamzah smiled, clearly enjoying your flustered state. “Trust me, they won’t,” he said, leaning in closer once more, his voice a soft murmur. “Besides, I really mean it. You look so good.”

His words lingered in the air. You wanted to respond, but all you could manage was a shy smile, your heart racing as you leaned into him just a little more, feeling safe wrapped in the blanket and his presence.

Just as you were getting lost in the moment with Hamzah, you heard the sound of Martin and Mandy returning from the kitchen, noticeably holding nothing. They settled back down on the couch, their laughter filling the room as they exchanged playful banter.

“Did we miss anything good?” Mandy asked, her eyes gleaming as she glanced between you and Hamzah.

You exchanged a quick look with Hamzah, both of you trying to keep straight faces. “Not much,” you said, trying to sound casual while your heart raced, still feeling the blush from his earlier compliment.

As the episode resumed, you all shifted back into the rhythm of the show. To your surprise, Hamzah seemed much more engaged now. He leaned forward slightly, his eyes glued to the screen, and began commenting on the islanders’ flirting with a newfound enthusiasm.

“Okay, but seriously, who actually thinks saying the same shit is going to help their relationship?” he said, shaking his head in disbelief. “These people are ridiculous.”

Mandy and Martin exchanged amused looks, clearly enjoying Hamzah’s sudden investment in the show. “Look at you, Hamzah! I thought you didn’t like this stuff,” Martin teased.

“I didn’t, but it’s actually, you know… whatever” Hamzah stated, a smile creeping across his face. “I just, you know, can’t believe they’re all falling for the same shit.”

It was as if the atmosphere shifted when Mandy and Martin returned, breaking the tension from before. Hamzah continued to contribute his thoughts, occasionally leaning closer to you to share his thoughts, making it feel as if you were in your own little bubble, even with your friends around.

As the credits rolled on the final episode of Love Island, you felt a wave of contentment wash over you. The laughter and chatter had slowed, and the comforting laughter of the evening made you subconsciously smile to yourself. You started gathering your things, slipping your phone into your bag and reaching for your jacket.

Mandy and Martin exchanged glances before Mandy spoke up. “So, have you booked a taxi to take you home yet?” she asked, leaning back on the couch.

You were about to respond with a casual “not yet” when Hamzah interrupted. “I’ll just take you home,” he said, his tone casual yet sincere, looking directly at you with that familiar warm smile.

You paused, slightly taken aback by the offer. “Oh, you don’t have to do that,” you said quickly, feeling a blush creep into your cheeks.

“Seriously, it’s no trouble at all,” Hamzah assured you, his eyes holding yours. “I’d be happy to.”

Mandy and Martin exchanged knowing looks, the corners of their mouths twitching into mischievous smiles. Mandy giggled, clearly enjoying the playful banter. “Yeah, who knew you would be willing to take someone home, Hamzah!”

You felt your heart race at their teasing, yet you couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement at the idea of leaving with him. “Okay, that sounds great,” you said, trying to sound unbothered but unable to hide the smile that gleemed across your face.

Hamzah stood up, a grin lighting up his features as he offered you his hand. “Ready to go?”

You took his hand, feeling the warmth of his grip, and stood up. As you moved toward the door, you caught the glances from Mandy and Martin, a feeling of happiness settling in your chest.

As the car hummed along the road, you glanced out the window. The streetlights blurred past, and you turned to Hamzah, noticing that you were headed in the opposite direction of your house. “Um, are you sure you know where you’re going?” you asked, a teasing lilt to your voice. “Because my place was back there.”

Hamzah shot you a charming smile. “Oh, I know exactly where I’m going,” he said smoothly, his tone playful. “But I have to admit, you’ve been driving me a little crazy tonight.”

Your heart raced at his words, a thrill coursing through you. “Oh really? And what makes you say that?” you replied, trying to sound unaffected, but your voice wavered slightly.

He glanced at you, a teasing grin on his lips, his hand casually resting on your thigh. You felt warmth radiate from his touch, and your breath caught in your throat. “Let’s just say, it’s hard to concentrate when you’re sitting right next to me, looking like that” he said, his voice low. “I think I just need a little more time alone with you.”

You could feel your cheeks heat up at his compliment, and the way his hand lingered on your thigh sent your heart racing. He chuckled softly

You felt your pulse quicken, a mix of excitement and nervousness swirling inside you. “You make it sound like I’m some kind of distraction,” you teased, though your heart raced at the implication.

“Maybe you are,” he replied with a smirk, his thumb brushing against your thigh lightly. “But a good distraction. One I wouldn’t mind spending more time with.” His gaze studying your reaction.

Your mind raced, flustered by his proximity and the warmth of his touch. “Alright, I guess I can stick around for a bit longer,” you managed to say, leaning back in your seat, trying to play it cool despite the fluttering in your stomach.

Hamzah’s grin widened as he nodded, clearly pleased with your response.

When you arrived at Hamzah's place, the atmosphere felt extremely tense. He parked the car, and as you both stepped out, he reached for your hand, intertwining your fingers. The warmth of his hand made your heart flutter as he led you to his front door.

Once inside, the cozy glow of the living room welcomed you. Hamzah turned to face you, his expression was inviting. “Make yourself at home,” he said, his voice smooth. You couldn’t help but admire the way the light highlighted his soft features.

Before you could settle onto the couch, Hamzah gently pulled you toward him. With a swift, fluid motion, he lifted you onto his lap, positioning you comfortably against him. The sudden closeness took your breath away, and you felt your cheeks flush as you instinctively wrapped your arms around his shoulders.

He looked up at you, a teasing smile on his lips. “This is much better, don’t you think?” His hands rested on your waist, grounding you in the moment.

“Definitely,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper as you tried to maintain your composure. The heat radiating from him was intoxicating, and being this close felt exhilarating.

Hamzah leaned in slightly, his breath warm against your ear. “I’ve wanted to spend time like this with you all night,” he admitted, his tone playful yet sincere. “Just us.”

You met his gaze, your heart racing at the intensity of the moment. “I’m glad we finally got the chance,” you said, a shy smile spreading across your lips.

He smirked, clearly pleased, and his hands running up and down your waist. “So am I,” he replied, his eyes focussing on your lips. The way he looked at you made your heart face, and you couldn’t help but lean a little closer, taking in every beautiful feature of his face.

As you settled into his lap, Hamzah looked up at you, his dark eyes filled with admiration. His hands found their way down to your ass, resting there gently but possessively. You felt a rush of warmth flood your cheeks, and you instinctively looked away, embarrassed by the intensity of his gaze.

"Hey," he said softly, his voice deep, "look at me." You hesitated for a moment but eventually turned your gaze back to him. "You're really beautiful, you know that?" His words sent butterflies racing through your stomach, and feeling shy at his compliment.

Before you could respond, Hamzah leaned in closer, his expression shifting to one of intent. "I've wanted to do this all night," he murmured, his breath warm against your lips. Then, without giving you a chance to think, he pulled you in for a kiss.

His lips met yours softly at first, but the kiss got hotter, igniting a spark that set your entire body alight. You melted against him, feeling the world around you fade away as you surrendered to the moment. His hands squeezed your ass, pulling you even closer, and you couldn't help but get lost in the warmth and heat of his kiss.

As Hamzah's lips pressed against yours, his tongue attempted to explore your mouth, waves of tension releasing through your entire body. The world around you faded into the background, and all that mattered was the connection you felt in that moment. You instinctively combed through his curls, tugging at his hair as the kiss grew more passionate.

His hands slid from your ass to your waist again, drawing you in even tighter as the heat between you intensified.

You felt a rush of heat mixed with a hint of nervousness course through you, Hamzah's presence was comforting but so very hot. He tilted his head slightly, deepening the kiss as his fingers gripped your sides, igniting sparks of desire that made your heart race.

Every brush of his lips sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach, and you couldn't help but respond with equal desperation, kissing him back with an urgency that made him smile against your mouth, biting down on your lip. As the kiss continued, you felt a sense of freedom and excitement, the tension that had been brewing between you finally breaking through in the most intoxicating way.

As the kiss deepened, Hamzah pulled back slightly, his warm breath brushing against your cheek. His eyes sparkled with admiration, and a soft smile graced his lips. “You look absolutely breathtaking like this,” he murmured, his voice sincere, sending a shiver down your spine.

Before you could respond, he leaned in closer, trailing rough kisses along your neck, from your collarbone to just below your ear. Each touch turning you on more, you instinctively leaned into him, surrendering to the warmth of his affection. “You have no idea how stunning you are,” he whispered against your skin, his lips lingering with an intoxicating tenderness. “Fuck, seeing you here on my lap, it’s driving me insane.”

Your heart raced as you felt your cheeks flush at his words. “Hamzah,” you breathed, a mix of embarrassment and exhilaration filling the air around you.

He pulled back just enough to meet your gaze, his hands resting firmly on your waist. “I truly mean it,” he said earnestly, his expression softening with genuine affection. “You’re so beautiful, and having you here with me, like this, feels so right.”

The sincerity in his voice made your heart swell, and you felt a rush of warmth at his heartfelt compliments. “Shut up Hamzah,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper as you caught his gaze.

Hamzah smiled, the corners of his mouth lifting in a way that made your stomach flutter. “You deserve to hear it,” he said softly, leaning in closer, his breath laboured as he rested his forehead resting gently against yours. “I’ve been waiting for a moment like this, just the two of us, you feeling good against me.”

His words hung in the air, wrapping around you like a warm embrace. The connection between you felt deeper than ever, charged with unspoken promises. As you gazed into his eyes, you felt a sense of peace and excitement, knowing this was only the beginning of something truly special.

As Hamzah's kisses trailed along your neck, a spark of excitement coursed through you, but when he playfully bit down, a gasp escaped your lips. The sensation was hot, sending shivers down your spine and making your heart pound against your ribcage.

“Hamzah,” you whispered, your voice laced with desperation. You glanced away from him, worried that Mandy and Martin might catch a glimpse of the red marks on your neck. “What if they notice?”

Hamzah pulled back slightly, his eyes glimmering with mischief. “Let them see,” he teased, his voice low and playful. “I want them to know how much I enjoy having you here.” He leaned in again, his lips brushing against your ear, sending another thrill through you. “But I also don’t want to share how insane you make me feel just yet,” he added, giving you a smirk that made your heart flutter.

You felt a mixture of thrill and apprehension, torn between the desire to lean into his affection and the worry of your neck being seen. “I don’t know if this is a good idea…” you said, biting your lip, but the way he was looking at you made it hard to resist.

Hamzah’s expression softened as he gently cupped your face with his hands, bringing your attention back to him. “Just trust me,” he murmured, leaning in closer. “I’ll be careful.” He planted a soft kiss on your neck, his breath warm against your skin. The thrill of his playful bite lingered, and you couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement mingle in the air.

As Hamzah leaned in closer in the comfort of his living room, his hands slipped beneath your shirt, brushing against the soft skin of your waist. The sensation sent a delightful shiver through you, amplifying the warmth that enveloped both of you. The intimacy of the moment felt intoxicating, and you couldn't help but lean closer, craving more of his touch.

His fingers danced along your sides, exploring the curve of your body with gentle caresses that made your heart race. The warmth of his hands against your skin sent hot pulses through you, igniting every nerve ending as he moved with urgency. You felt entirely enveloped in this private world, far away from the distractions of the outside.

"Hamzah," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper, exhilaration and nervousness flooding your mind.

Despite the intensity of the moment, a tiny part of you worried about your relationship being discovered, but in Hamzah's house, there was a comforting sense of privacy that made you feel a little bolder.

He caught your gaze, a playful smile tugging at his lips. "We're all alone here," he murmured, his voice low and soothing. "Just you and me." His hands continued to explore, his hands finding a way to your bra squeezing your breast gently, igniting a heat that spread throughout your body.

You felt the world around you fade away, leaving only the sensation of his touch and the magnetic pull between you. The worries about the marks he was making were replaced by the heat of being so close to him. Each rough caress was a reminder of how much you longed for this moment.

He looked up at you, his eyes dark with desire, a playful smile tugging at his lips. "Just relax," he murmured, his voice low and soothing. "We can take our time." His touch was hot and burning, and as he caressed your breasts, you felt yourself melting into him, the rest of the world fading away.

You leaned in closer, feeling the heat radiating from his body, the tension between you electrifying. The night stretched on, and with every rough movement of his hands, you were drawn deeper into the intimacy of the moment.

[annabel-lee-nevermore]

Hey. I'm sure all of you have seen Red's post, which they chose to call an apology (though I beg to differ in some parts), where I was called out amongst many others. This whole situation is a mess and though there have been many posts already, I just want to add my two cents, as someone who was directly named. Apologies for how late this is compared to the rest of the situation, not trying to stir it all up again, I’ve just been busy. (Please note that everything I say here is my own take/opinions and I am not directly speaking for anyone else, any issues you have with anything said here are with me alone.) 

First of all, Red promised this post would be about the Crimson situation, the long prologue with the explanations of the "cliques" is completely unrelated and just an attempt to shift blame onto other groups for the situation blowing up as it did. This is especially horrible because of the fact that many of the people named are MINORS, who Red has constantly claimed to prioritize protecting, especially in the situation with Crimson exposing minors to NSFW. I'm not going to harp too much on the Crimson situation as I wasn't involved (or capable of being involved after my ban), though everything I have seen from Red has been a shitshow of mishandling, which they addressed, and I will give them credit for admitting they fucked up with it, and am VERY glad to see them step back from moderating, as I feel they were under far too much stress by both being highly active in the server as a mod and also trying to write a good story, and hope a larger variety of mods does the server good. I was there when the server hit 1k members, and knowing that the mod team didn’t grow until now (when last I heard it was around 6k?) feels like it would have driven anyone trying to moderate it insane. 

However, I am here to give my side of the story, which goes back to the drama with the confession blog "@/esoterichistoria", in which they were sent an anon ask which [paraphrased] asked why the account existed and what they got out of it, in a sense that implied they didn't believe the account should exist. This ask was not answered publicly and was screenshotted and posted in the hideout, one of the NON PATREON channels in the discord. Red then went on to reveal themselves as the person behind this anon ask which led to other people sending harassment to the account. I was firmly on the side of supporting EH, and wound up creating a post of my own  calling out the hypocrisy and "word of god" reliance on lore snippets sent by Red and Flynn in the discord, which when sent in the free channels would eventually disperse into the tumblr fandom. Unless I mistakenly shared a minor fact that was patreon exclusive (which would have only been shared to me by someone who was affected asking if they were right to be concerned about it) I did not intentionally state any patreon only information in any of my comments within and under that post. 

That post for me, was what happened when the straw broke the camel's back. I had seen several instances of fan to fan hostility (such as telling people off for using the tumblr "#nevermore webtoon" tag for confession blog related posts, but only for the original blog and not the second one that popped up during this drama). I was fed up with watching a fandom I truly loved fall apart, and felt that speaking up about it would be the only way to see any change within this issue. However, I will admit the post was written in a stress induced craze as I was at the end of finals and preparing to move at the same time, which definitely greatly impacted my capacity to truly think through why I should make that post in the first place, but I felt the only way to get the drama out of my head was to send it out into the void of tumblr, and then, through the next day when I had a few spare moments I responded to a few people asking clarifying questions with less than stellar tact. 

It was quite shocking for me to find out, just a day or so later (forgive me I am not the greatest with dates or timelines) that the Nevermore discord was gone from my server list, which I mainly noticed because I often use the emotes from that server in casual conversations with friends, and found my favorited emotes completely lacking of them. I had no message of why I had been banned, and shrugged it off as I hadn't been active in the discord community in ages, as I was busy with other things. 

A few hours later, Percy, who Red had reached out to directly (but none of the other members of our "clique" as Red puts it heard a peep) shared a truly baffling DM that consisted of refusing to explain and extrapolating reasons behind actions that did not exist to justify the ban. We laughed it off and moved on, as though we enjoyed the fandom and comic itself, losing access to the discord was no loss as of our lack of usage of it in the first place. 

I was in no way Stalking, nor were any of my friends. We had been members of a fandom who loved the comic and fandom, and had come to a point where our unpopular fandom opinions led us to feel a bit on the outside of the main popular opinion, and we were also just naturally shifting to different interests. 

This, alongside the fallout of having expressed opinions on Montresor and the specific ways that his relationship with Ada progressed. I DON'T see people who ship Montrada as supporting a "SA Fetish Ship", I just personally wasn't a fan of it and alongside my friends who shared the same opinion, was sick of being told that we were blatantly WRONG for having a differing opinion, and chose to distance ourselves because of the level of vitriol we had experienced, and some made a statement saying we didn't wish to associate with people who enjoyed the ship, which is a perfectly normal way to interact with fandom. There are definitely perfectly valid ways to interact with the ship, and even explore it in interesting ways, it is just ways that I personally am not interested in engaging with. 

(And just to point out the elephant in the room, yes I have a fic that focuses on Montrada, both because I saw a part of my former self in Ada and someone who hurt me in Montresor, and this fic was planned out long before Montrada was hinting at becoming canon in the comic. Though this fic is written in an explicit manner, it was on a site that allows that and was tagged correctly for those who wish to avoid it.) 

I know I'm trying to prove myself to people who have made up their minds on if they believe Red's statement, and I know for those who have their minds made up, nothing I can say will change that unless they are willing to, and I can't force that. I personally do not agree with many opinions Red holds, and find the act of plastering the usernames of people, including minors, that they dislike on a public tumblr post knowing they have a loyal fanbase who may choose to take it upon themselves to harass people out of a sense of vigilante justice, frankly abhorrent and irresponsible. Though I would like to believe that the Nevermore fandom is better than stooping to harassment, I know it is naive to believe in any fandom that this is the case, every fandom will have a few bad apples, even if the fandom at large is kind and passionate and supportive of fellow fans. (note: as of writing at least one person I've been in contact with have received direct harassment) 

As someone who has a tendency to come across as rude and bitchy when in a passionate argument/debate with someone, especially when an emotional connection to the subject is involved on my end, I know I may have been combative to an excessive degree and given myself a bad name. For anyone who has felt hurt in an argument with me, I do apologize, as sometimes I don't know the harshness of my words. I do quite enjoy a good argument, and when things get heated I do find myself being quite harsh, something many people do, especially when they have had a history of being the only one on their side of an opinion.  

Despite the drama, I do still love the comic, through a more analytical lens and with caveats of my own personal opinions perhaps, but I do truly love the characters, the world, and am curious to know what comes next in the story when it returns from hiatus. Though I don't believe I will ever have a positive view of Red interpersonally, I want them and Flynn to be able to continue the comic for as long as they feel they need to tell a complete story. I probably will continue to write fic and engage with the fandom, as in my opinion, Fandom is for the Fans, not the Creators, and I truly do love sharing my writing with the Fandom, and I have many fic ideas that I want to have a chance to bring to fruition. 

For those who don't wish to dig in deep on the older drama with the Montrada situation or my general drama hot takes, you can hop off here, and even if this didn't change anything for you I appreciate you taking the chance on hearing me out, as I am quite wordy and I know this post is already rather long. However, since Red’s post brought up these issues, I feel I should at least address them.

First off, on the accusation of stalking, I do feel Red may be pointing a finger and forgetting that three point back at them, as though I do understand wanting to have a grasp on who someone is when you feel wronged by them, going out of your way to construct a narrative of who's friends with who, and what they do in their free time, alongside congregating information about them to share publicly when even in the best case of you being correct their crimes were at MOST having an insular group chat and occasionally getting in arguments about unpopular fandom opinions or standing opposite your side in drama. 

By every metric, while sharing screenshots can be seen as in bad taste, doing so with a small group of friends in a private group chat is not the end of the world. The phrase "keep it in the group chat" exists for a reason, people often share with their friends things they may not say publicly, and that is perfectly okay provided it's not planning some sort of direct attack on someone. People going "ugh I don't agree with xyz and wish they'd see reason" to friends is not stalking, it's a bit of gossip between friends, and when it comes from something that began as a shared interest that brought the group together, there's no harm in it. However, congregating identifying information and sharing it publicly DOES have harm in it, because no matter how many times you tell your audience not to harass people, opening the doors for it makes it more likely to happen regardless.

Secondly, calling the post an apology was a half truth. Yes, the final paragraphs WERE an apology, but based on the situation and what was truly going on, the explanations of the Cliques was unnecessary and distracted greatly from the actual apology present. Especially as the context of “Clique 2” does NOTHING to add to the story of the situation with Crimson and why an apology is necessary. The situation was blown greatly out of proportion by adding on more context than the situation required, and is definitely the reason the controversy has grown so large. Not only was diverting to the explanations of the Cliques cluttering the otherwise potentially strong apology, it both works to paint Red as the victim to garner sympathy from loyal fans, and gives a target to go after for why the situation has grown so horrible, when a concise apology that left that all out would have cleared the air on the Crimson situation and not led to a large group of people who were unjustly called out and have their information blasted for anyone to see and opening them to excessive harassment. 

Finally, Speaking to Red directly, If you'll allow me to speak at you a bit personally for a moment, the way you framed things in your post regarding "Clique 2" to me in some regards comes across as a misinterpretation of criticism of the comic and its characters as a criticism of you. As a writer I understand how your work often feels like an extension of you, and criticism often feels personal, but to take a small group of people who share a similar criticism and extrapolate it to mean they're spreading vitriol about you is a bit extreme. 

(And in screenshots regarding the Prospero aromanticism issue that have been posted to tumblr, this seems to be a recurring pattern of seeing anyone who has concerns about how a certain aspect is being normalized within the fandom with encouragement from the creators, which regardless of intent comes across as endorsement, as an attack and trying to make an issue out of something that isn’t really that deep.) 

Anyways, the main situation regarding the Montresor and Ada ship happened over a year ago and I have no way to access or look back on what was said having been banned from the discord, there may be discrepancies in intent and execution so take all of this with a grain of salt if you'd like, but I never meant to say that you as the author were glorifying SA by having Montresor and Ada to exist as a ship. It was a mixture frustration with how Ada's characterization (as interpreted by what existed in the comic) did a 180 and how the relationship between her and Monty was framed and the fandom's manner of acting as if saying that it personally made someone uncomfortable they were just a hater trying to stir drama. The fandom's usage of the phrase “fun toxic” and overromanticizing when Monty had been consistently characterized as misogynistic (not a bad thing) and Ada's prior characterization didn't line up with the “mutually toxic” idea that was being spread. I'd be a hypocrite if I was saying that every ship had to be morally pure, I've written some pretty morally bankrupt relationships in my own original works. I just found that the way the fandom acted around Montrada at the time was really uncomfortable to be around as an SA survivor simply because of the way people were changing their opinions of the barking scene, which to me with just the context of the scene itself was not at all something Ada did consensually (or only did under coercion) and is a form of humiliation which is sexual harassment. 

It was never a moral righteousness witch hunt or anything, more just some fans pointing out how the portrayal of it could come off to people who was a survivor of someone who acted like Monty and that the energy in the fandom around it was uncomfortable and didn't actually leave room for nuance on the opinions of Montrada. I have always been a proponent of letting people ship what they want to, even if it’s personally not what I enjoy in the fandom. Perhaps the way it was portrayed on my end at the time didn’t come off the way it was intended, but there is a massive difference in my opinion between thinking anyone who enjoys a particular ship is evil and being personally uncomfortable with a ship and not wanting to engage with it within fandom, even with it being canon. And the preference for Morella and Ada was never upholding a "morally pure" ship as "better" than Montrada, it was simply preference from people who had already been shipping Morellada for a long time and didn't choose to abandon ship over Montrada becoming canon, only finding new reasons to continue holding that opinion. 

All in all. I’ll miss when the good times of the fandom were around, and definitely will stick around for season 2. I wish it hadn’t all turned out this way, as I’ve made great memories and friends because of this comic and community. To anyone who still has questions or something to say to me, my ask box and dms here have always been open. And hey, if Red or Flynn have anything to say to me, feel free to reach out. I’m open to a civil conversation if that's what’s desired. 

~~ Rose, of the “dark stalker Clique”

[shoccolat]

this is probably going to sound crazy, but i really do think the most vital and pivotal core of nishimaji is nishitani's death.

not just in the way it affects, and influences, majima—giving him the motivation to break out and present himself on his own terms, his mad dog fighting style, his flashy and garish fashion choices, even his facial hair, as well as dreaming of nishitani telling him he's proud of him—but in what we learn about nishitani in his final moments.

before we get to that, though, let's take a closer look at who nishitani is.

nishitani is a wildcard. he does whatever he wants, whenever he wants, however he wants. he's not held back by anything other than a personal moral code that's a bit questionable, but usually well-intentioned nonetheless. 

by that i mean, he's not heartless. 

he backs off when the grand's hostess tells him she's not interested and lets her set the conditions on her own terms. he doesn't keep fighting majima after he throws the first punch and realizes majima isn't fighting back. he's out for makoto, sure, but he reassures majima that he's not going to harm her and never planned to, even before majima showed discomfort in nishitani 'hunting' her. and of course, he avenged biliken's daughter because of how devastatingly hard it hit his uncle.

nishitani may be rough and cocky, but he's never cruel. he's incredibly perceptive and knows when to back off. for a yakuza patriarch, he's vastly different than the cold, uncaring, selfish ones we see in the series.

and yet, he says this: 

and that changes things a bit. because in a way, he sees himself just like those other heartless yakuza—he's done all the dirty work it takes to get to where he is and then some, and has gotten quite successful because of it. so why would "a guy like [him]" be feeling sentimental towards majima? 

really, hasn't he been feeling this way the entire time? 

he plays the tough guy act, but really, he's fallen head over heels for majima and he knows it. says it himself, even. 

and it's not just a creepy façade to deter majima (especially since majima never really seems all that deterred by it, especially in the jail cell, where he even starts to flirt along) because nishitani isn't one to fake anything. he's so unapologetically himself and if anything, that's what majima admires and looks up to most. 

but majima is also perceptive and smart and kind, and wouldn't look up to a shitty person who never cared for anyone but himself, even if they're yakuza and in a higher position than himself. he has sagawa for that, and majima absolutely hates his guts. whereas he sees something novel and good in nishitani.

it's especially notable that nishitani shares the same sentiment about sagawa, and even offers majima an alternative. 

at this point we know that working under nishitani would've been vastly different than being under sagawa's thumb, but not to what extent... what kind of boss would he have been to majima…?

honestly, they could've left it right there. "nishitani has a weak spot for majima, majima looks up to nishitani, and there's some semblance of respect between them." that alone would've left plenty for fans to work with. 

but no. they just had to take it that one step further.

they had nishitani sacrifice himself for majima. he fully, physically blocked majima from getting shot, arms outstretched, protecting majima. he drops the playful banter and gives majima the most motivating advice of his life. and he shows a fierce loyalty towards majima that would probably never have been shown just as intensely as it was in that moment. in life or death, he chose majima's over his own.

i made a post about his irezumi a while ago, but if you haven't seen it yet, i imagine his would've been an okami. 

okami are seen as wildcards, too, being either protective or aggressive towards humans—how they act is entirely dependent on how the human treats them. and for okami, there exists the fierce loyalty that a wolf maintains towards its pack. 

it's only in nishitani's final moments that we see just how deep that loyalty lies.

[lvrsparadise]

'WHY (NOT)?' - S.T

Synopsis - "There used to be six of us. Now I'm alone."

Warnings! - Mentions of death, blood, (mild) gore, fear, vomit, profanity, italics mean flash back (will write at top who's pov), depictions of murder, sharp objects, angst, crying, yelling, implied Matt x Y/N, might make a pt2 don't know yet.

A/N - You know what's the best part about being creative? THIS ISN'T MY IDEA!! I GOT IT FROM PINTEREST! But like, BANGER. I had sm fun writing this ngl. (I cried, multiple times.)

I look into the eyes of the police officer across from me, exhaling frustratedly.

"I swear! I didn't do it! Something attacked us!"

"And how am I supposed to believe you? There's no footage of it."

I groan out, even more frustrated than before. I lay my head in my palms, which are shaking from what I saw, and frustration.

I hear the cop sigh and his chair scraping against the floor, as he stands and leaves the room.

----

!Y/N POV!

I look out the window at the old and abandoned mansion we're about to head into and unbuckle my seatbelt, looking at everyone else in the van.

"Dude I'm stoked." Chris daps Nate up as they get out of the car and head to the trunk to get our stuff.

I smile softly and shake my head.

"I'm honestly terrified."

"Me too" Me and Madi say in unison to Nick.

I turn my head to Matt, in the driver's seat next to me, and we share a look for a while, just taking each other in, before I step out of the car to help Chris and Nate with the stuff we brought.

"Dude, what if some like creepy old ghost haunts this place and like, possesses one of us?"

"How can you say that with a straight face Nate?"

He shrugs with a small smirk on his mouth as he hands me my backpack.

I roll my eyes and open my bag to make sure I have everything I need.

Flashlight, food, water, clothes, a blanket, my pocketknife, and batteries.

-

Once we're all set with our gear, we all collectively walk into the mansion, splitting up into groups of two.

Chris with Nate. Me with Matt, and Nick with Madi.

We all have cameras to record our own little adventures. We all are in different parts of the hose.

Me and Matt are upstairs, looking at all of the bedrooms, studies, and libraries.

"Woah, look at this painting."

I point my flashlight at the painting above a really gaudy and luxurious bed set, with is dirty and dusty.

It's a painting of a lady in a pencil thin bodice, long dress, and her eyes hollow and sunken. Her skin pale and bruised in several places.

"Holy fuck. That's nightmare fuel." He points our camera at the painting as he speaks.

"I know." I whisper as we continue looking around the room, filming all of it.

-

"So, as I was saying guys-" My foot hits something, and I furrow my brows looking down at whatever it is, my eyes soon widening in fear.

"Matt! MATT!" I yell out for him, running to where I was with him last, thankfully finding him there.

"Woah! Hey! Hey, what's wrong?"

I gulp and shake my head, my eyes filling with tears and my eyes still wide. I feel like I'm going to puke.

I just start walking back to where my foot hit the thing on the ground. I point my flashlight down to it, gagging at the sight of Chris laying on his back, dead.

His eyes, not there, blood coming from his mouth, and many large gashes on his chest.

I feel my breathing pick up, and a hand on my shoulder, ultimately ripping my gaze away from the once fun, and bubbly guy, now laying on the floor dead.

I hear Matt gag and watch as he does a full 180 and holds his hand over his mouth.

----

I cry for what feels like the hundredth time today. Not caring about the cops and investigators on the other side of what I know is a one-sided window.

The sight of seeing everyone I love, and the guy I've been crushing on, dead, all missing their eyes. A horror I'll never forget for as long as I live.

I hear the door open again, and don't bother to look at it. These handcuffs were really starting to hurt.

I hear whoever it was plop down in the chair across from me and drop a file on the table.

I wipe my face the best I can with the cuffs and look up at the person.

It's a different cop or whatever than the many who've came in here.

"I'm not here to interrogate you or overwhelm you with questions, I'm here to help you grasp the severity of this situation and why your co-operation is valuable right now."

"I'm telling the truth! I didn't murder my fucking friends!"

She holds up her hand in a motion telling me to stop, and she opens the file, pulling our multiple photos, and angles of my friends, all dead. Pale, eyes sunken and gouged out.

I gag at the pictures. She points to one of Matt's photos, a picture of him alive and happy next to the horrifying image I'll never forget seeing.

"This is Matthew Sturniolo? Correct?"

I nod and swallow the bile in my throat and clearing it before speaking.

"Y-Yes that's him."

"Okay. And this one?" She points to a photo of Madi, looking barely recognizable. I sob quietly and nod, sniffling.

"That's- That's Madi- uh, Madison Filipowicz."

She points to a photo of a boy in a backwards hat that I recognize as Nate's. I feel more tears fall down my face at the fact he's too unrecognizable on his face that the only reason I knew it was him was by his blood-soaked Boston Red Sox hat.

"Nath- Nathan Doe."

"And this one's Nicolas? Right?"

I nod as she points to a photo of Nick.

"Y-yeah." I blow out a shaky breath.

"So that leaves this one to be Christopher." She gestures to the photo of Chris. I don't even bother to look at it, fearing I might actually puke all over this table, the photos, and the lady's nice tan pantsuit.

----

!CHRIS'S POV!

Me and Nate watch Matt and Y/N walk up the stairs in front of us, but once we reach the top, we split and go opposite directions.

"Dude! Look at this old ass record player." Nate points his flashlight to the record player in the middle of the room.

"It's so fucking dusty."

"Well, no shit. It's probably been here for a hundred years."

"Ha ha. Although, probably has. This place looks like if you breathed wrong it'd fall over."

I drag my finger along the back of the chair, and it was dusty as hell.

-

After a bit of walking around, we make it to a large hall with a long table in the middle and chairs, on every side of the table.

"What're we here for? Dinner." I snicker at Nate's joke and shine the flashlight on it, while using my other hand to point the camera at it as well.

"Damn, hoity toity ass dining table." I mumble. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a shadow, or like a figure, but I brush it off as the light from the flashlight and mine or Nate's silhouette.

"Look at that dude!" Nate points his flashlight at a painting at the head of the table. A dude in his 40's maybe 50's with chops and a bald head, wearing some goofy ass clown collar.

"Dude looks like his name was fucking, Edward or Baldwin."

"This house has to be at least 200 years old or some shit. Because there's no way this fucker existed a hundred years ago."

I laugh at Nate's words. But I'm cut off by a scream from down the hall. Both me and Nate look at each other and point our flashlights to the staircase we came up, just in case.

"The fuck was that?"

"I don't kno-" Another scream. Sounds like.

"Madi."

"Fuck." I go to run down the stairs, but I'm yanked back by my backpack. Hard.

I hit the ground with a 'umphf' and a groan, having the air knocked out of me.

I cough and hear Nate yelling my name.

"CHRIS! CHRIS WATCH OUT!"

But I feel cold on my chest and look down to it to see at least 5 large gashes across my chest.

"The fuck-?" I mumble and look up to see some whack ass thing, with fingers as long as my fucking arm. And sharp looking. Black eyes, or none at all, I can't tell. And so many fucking large teeth.

My eyes widen in horror at the sight of the thing. It's skin grey and yellow, his body thin and tall, adorned with large bone like wings and spikes in its spine and its knuckles.

I don't even get a chance to let out a full scream when I feel a sharp pain in my eyes, and everything goes black and numb.

----

I rub my wrists as they take the cuffs off me so I can eat what they gave me. Which looks amazing, but I have no appetite.

It's a pork loin, mashed potatoes, green beans, fries, some juices, some fruits like pineapple, apple, strawberry, and some baby carrots and cucumbers.

Like I said, looks delicious, but if I try to eat it, it might comeback up.

The cop leaves the room and I'm left alone with my thoughts again.

I sigh and pick up the plastic fork, scooping up some mashed potatoes and eating a little bit. But they don't taste how they should. They feel like sandpaper against my mouth. Like grit, and I have to force myself to swallow it. I know it's not the food, but me.

I push the tray away and rest my arms on the table, laying my head on them and sobbing, but no tears come out. I've dried them up. I mean can you blame me? I just watched almost every single one of my friends die.

I wish I had told Matt how I felt. Maybe I wouldn't feel like this. Like I'm missing something. Like I could've convinced them not to go. Like I could've helped instead of just watching.

Maybe then all of my friends wouldn't be dead.

It's crazy how much one little decision can cause. Like, deciding to go to that mansion in the first place. If we'd just stayed home or brought professionals maybe, then I wouldn't have watched them die. Watch as their eyes were poked out and watch as their bodies sag to the floor.

I scoot the chair back and puke under the table, unable to hold it down anymore. It's all too much.

After I vomit, I pick up the cup of water from the table and wash my mouth out. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to rid myself of those images.

-

I rub my eyes and watch as, yet another cop enters the room, accompanied by what looks to be either a journalist or a lawyer, they dress the same so I can't tell.

They sit across from me, and the journalist or lawyer lady sets a recorder, a file, and a plastic bag on the table as the cop throws down another file.

"I want you to tell me what happened Ms. L/N. In full detail. Explain what happened to your friends, as well as why you survived." The journalist, I've confirmed, speaks in a demanding tone, but still so monotone, and pushes a lock of her jet-black hair behind her ears.

"You asked for it." I shrug and scoot closer to the table, careful to avoid my pile of vomit on the floor, and rest my arms on the cool metal surface, lacing my hands together.

"So, Matt Nick and Chris are- were YouTubers, and they had a cool video idea that they wanted to do. So, they we set a date, got everything packed, invited a few friends, me included, and we set off to the old Gordon family mansion in Los Angelas. Once we got there, we all split up into groups of two, seeing as there were six of us." I clear my throat and stammer over my words for a second before continuing.

"Uh- Me, Matt, Chris, and Nate went to the second floor to explore while Nick and Madi were on the first floor, looking around there. Nate and Chris went in one direction and Me and Matt went another. We-we, we stumbled upon a series of paintings of a family, looking almost dead, and that's when I-" I take a deep breath before trying to continue. Keyword, trying.

The journalist sighs and places one of her hands on top of mine, in sympathy.

"It's okay, take as much time as you need."

I take another deep breath and continue.

"I was walking when I kic-kicked Chris's body, unknowingly. I yelled for Matt, and I ran back to him to bring him to it. Once we got to his- his body, we both just broke- broke down and soon after I had found him, Nate appears out of nowhere, seemingly hiding. With a horrified face. Just, completely pale and his eyes wide open, like they were stuck like that. And he said he saw what had happened."

"Can you tell us that?" The cop asks, and I nod.

"Ye-yeah." I drag in a shaky breath and le it out slowly.

"Um- there was this- this thing, he said. And it was at least 8 feet tall, and you could see the bones through its gray skin. It had bone like wings, spikes coming from his spine and knuckles, and horns made of bone spiking through its head. He said it had no eyes, or they were just black, and large, spikey teeth. And it had long spikes for fingers, and that he saw as the- the thing poked Chris's- Chris's..." I let out a small sob at the recall of what Nate said, moments before his own untimely death.

"It poked out Chris's eyes with his long fingers and Chris barely got a chance to scream out." I finish and sob into my hand, which is now covering my eyes and shaking again.

"What happened after Nathan told you what happened?" The cop is writing in his little flip-notepad, scribbling things down, most likely the description of whatever it was that killed my friends.

"Uhm- We heard something that sounded like a crying scream and a siren, the next thing we knew, Nate was flying towards me and Matt, he landed on me, pinning my body down as he lays on his back on top of me. The thing he had described seconds before, was now standing over me, gashing at Nate, with screams and wails of agony coming from him. Then, it all went silent, when I opened my eyes, the thing was gone, and I scrambled to my feet, pushing Nate's body off of me, and that's when I see, he's missing his eyes and he's almost unrecognizable." I let out a muffled sob into my hand as I try to hold back the sobs, my throat forming a lump in it, making it hard to speak.

'Then what?" Despite the circumstances, the journalist has a very soft and comforting voice.

"Me- me and Matt ran back downstairs, looking for Nick and Madi. Thankfully, we found them, alive, and we said in a rush and rambled mess that we had to go, something was there, we're all going to die. Something along those lines, and they were like, or Nick was like 'slow down, what's going on?' and so we slowed down and told him what happened. And it was like speaking about that damn thing summoned it, because the next thing I know, it's standing behind Madi..." I blow out a shaky breath and close my eyes for a second, but open them quickly, seeing as the only thing I see when I close them is the horrifying images of my friends dying in front of me.

"And then she's being thrown across the room with 4 to 5 gashes on her chest and then the thing seems to teleport, and looms over her as she screams in pain, fear, and pure agony. Then it's silent again. And Madi's dead." I hang my head in my hands, more tears slipping down my cheeks.

"What happened next?" I sniffle and wipe my face, looking back at the cop and journalist in front of me. Both of their faces intrigued, and full of sadness and sympathy.

"Me, Matt, and Nick start running for our lives to the front door of the house, but we can hear and feel the thundering footsteps of the creature behind us. Making that wailing slash siren sound again. We made it out the door, but the thing catches Nick just as we do. I grab my pocketknife from my backpack, and I throw it at the thing, landing right in between its eyes. And bright, glowing blue blood starts oozing from its eyes, and where my knife is lodged in its skull. I remember the fear I had in that moment. Because that means, I'm about to lose another one of my friends. And Matt is about to watch his own brother die, right in front of him." I choke out a sob and shake my head slowly. Seeing it was enough, but having to tell someone about it? Makes everything so much worse.

"Then same thing with Nick as the others. Except the thing kept Nick standing while it- it- it killed him. And I watched as his body sagged to the floor, landing with a thud and a pool of blood instantly forming around it." I gag reflexively, but I hold it down.

"Me and Matt ran as fast as we could, but it wasn't enough. It was never supposed to go that far! I wasn't supposed to lose Matt! He was the one who was to survive!" I sob and yell out, pointing my finger in the air at no one specifically.

"We- we made it to the car and started to drive off, but the fucking thing crushed the back half of the car!"

----

!Y/N POV!

"Matt! Come on! Drive! GO!"

"I'm driving Y/N!"

The car seems to shrink and then next thing I know, we're doing burnouts from not having the back half of his car anymore. I'm sobbing at this point.

"I don't want to die!"

"You're not going to Y/N... I promise."

"Wh-what?"

He smiles softly at me before he kisses the back of my hand and unbuckles my seatbelt.

"When I get out, I want you to run."

"No- no. I'm not leaving you Matt."

"What am I without Chris? Or Nick? Nate? Madi? It's better this way."

"But Matt..."

He shakes his head firmly and steps out of the car, cueing me to run.

I shrug off my backpack and run out of the passenger seat, booking it, but stopping and turning around to see Matt, and hearing his screams.

My hands fly over my mouth at the sight of Matt getting his eyes poked out. The creature dropping his body to the ground as though it were a doll.

The thing stalks back into the house, leaving me outside.

Once I know the thing is gone, I run to Matt's body and grab his hand, holding it to my face, sobbing.

"No. no, no, no, no, no." I shake my head repeatedly.

----

"Why leave you alive?" The cop furrows his eyebrows as he looks up from his notepad.

"I don't know." I shake my head and sob, almost uncontrollably, but not loudly.

The journalist nods and takes my hands in hers.

"I know what you saw is deeply traumatic, but was there Anything else that happened? Anything that could help us with this?"

"Nothing else happened. I swear." I shake my head and control my sobs, tears still streaming down my face.

--

After a few more hours of waiting in this very uncomfortable chair, a cop, and what looks to be the chief, walk in and I immediately straighten my posture, out of respect.

"Miss L/N, correct?"

"Uh- yes sir."

"We're letting you go, but we will be checking up on you weekly. You're free to go. And stay safe out there."

I nod and stand up from the metal chair, walking over to the chief and shaking his hand.

"Will do."

-

After I've gone through the whole, discharge process, I'm walking out of the glass doors of the police station.

My phone starts ringing from my pocket, and I grab it out and answering it.

"Yeah?"

"Well done. You really know how to hold a story."

"Well, you know how to play dead." I smirk.

"And you did good playing the victim. Make it home safe. See you tonight Y/N."

"See you then Matt."

Tags ! ✮

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If you want to be added to the list, all you have to do is ask !! ✮

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And I hope you all have a wonderful day and / or night ✮

[cheynovak]

Family business: Part 2   

Billy Butcher & Sarah Butcher x Soldier boy  

Warnings:  Age difference, cursing, violence, ... it's the boys... what not  

Side note: English isn’t my first language.   

Didn't proof read, i'm sorry for any mistakes

*Does not follow The Boys storyline *  

It took a while I'm soooo sorry! But here is part 2  

-- 

Recap: Sarah is Billy Butcher’s daughter from a previous relationship. He did not raise her. Years later Billy’s and Sarah’s paths cross when they search for the weapon that killed Soldier boy only to find the supe himself, who seems to have an special interest in Sarah. After a night together she is pregnant.  

Dealing with this situation and Soldier boy being locked away again she gets a call from Homelander.  

-- 

New York City, where towering skyscrapers cast long shadows over the streets below, Sarah stood at the edge of a rooftop, her gaze fixed on the bustling cityscape. Contemplating about all that happened over the last few months.  

A huge fight with Billy made her decided to take the offer of Homelander. A safe place for her and the kid. “Since we’re practically family.” He had said. She knew better than to trust him. But Billy had his own demons to fight.  

Billy... she had inherited his stubbornness and sharp tongue, traits that often led to heated arguments between father and daughter. The last one gave her a final push to take off and move into the Vought tower. 

As Sarah leaned against the edge of the rooftop, lost in her thoughts, she couldn't shake the feeling of unease that had settled in her chest. Her mind drifted to the child growing inside her, a constant reminder to watch her back.  

Weeks turned into months, and Sarah found herself settling into her new life at Vought Tower. Homelander had been surprisingly accommodating, providing her with everything she needed to ensure her comfort during her pregnancy. 

But behind the facade of kindness, Sarah sensed something wrong. There was a coldness in Homelander's eyes whenever they crossed paths, a distance that seemed to grow with each passing day. 

As her due date drew nearer, Sarah couldn't help but feel a sense of loneliness creeping in. Despite being surrounded by luxury, she longed for the warmth of family, for someone to share in her joy and fears. God she missed her mom.  

Tonight, Sarah gathered all her courage to confront Homelander. The air in the room crackled with tension as they stood face to face with him. “John," Sarah's voice was firm, though tinged with desperation, "You need to find Ben. My child needs his father." 

Homelander's gaze remained cold and unyielding, his expression betraying none of the turmoil that Sarah felt churning inside her. "And why should I do that? He tried to kill me." he retorted, his voice dripping with disdain. 

Frustration boiled within Sarah as she struggled to contain her rising anger. "Because it's the right thing to do!" she shot back, her voice trembling with emotion.  

“He needs a father yes, I can be his father.” For a moment, there was silence as the weight of Sarah's words hung heavy in the air. Those words made Sarah’s blood boil and without a single thought to it she hit the side of his face. But before Homelander could respond, a sudden movement caught Sarah off guard.  

Ryan. 

With a swift motion, he pushed Sarah aside, causing her to stumble and fall to the ground, he stepped forward “Leave my dad alone," he pleaded, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Pain shot through Sarah as she hit the ground, Homelander came rushing down to her. “Are you ok?”  - “I’m fine” she said pulling her arm out of his grip. But as she walked back to her room. Sarah felt a sharp pain radiating through her abdomen. Panic rushed through her as she realized that there was something wrong.  

Frantically, she reached for her phone, but before she could dial for help, Homelander appeared. His expression was unreadable as he took in the scene before him. 

Without a word, he scooped Sarah into his arms and carried her to the medical wing of Vought Tower. As the hours passed, Sarah's pain intensified, but Homelander remained by her side, his presence a strange mixture of comfort and discomfort. 

Finally, the cries of a newborn filled the room, and Sarah's heart swelled with love as she held her son for the first time. But as she looked up at Homelander, she saw something flicker in his eyes, something she couldn't quite decipher. 

He wants my child, he wants his fucked up family no matter what. I need to keep him safe. Was all Sarah could think.  

As Sarah cradled her newborn son in her arms, her heart heavy with fear and uncertainty, she knew there was only one person she could turn to for help: her father.  

"Sarah?" Billy's voice sounded gruff yet concerned as he answered the call. "What's the matter, lass? She sounds distressed." “Can we meet?” “  

“Where?”  

“The old bridge?”  

"I'm on my way, Sarah. Just hold tight," he assured her, his voice laced with determination. As Sarah hung up the phone, a sense of relief washed over her. Despite their differences, she knew that her father would do whatever it took to protect her and her son. 

Minutes felt like hours as Sarah anxiously waited for her father's arrival. With each passing moment, her fear grew, Sarah's heart leaped with relief as she saw her father striding towards her, his expression fierce yet determined. 

Sarah's eyes filled with tears as she recounted the events that had transpired at Vought Tower, her voice shaking with emotion. She told her father about the confrontation with Homelander, the fear for her son's safety.  

Billy's fists clenched with anger as he listened to his daughter's story, the flames of his hatred for Supes burning brighter than ever. "We'll figure this out, Sarah," Billy said, his voice firm yet comforting as he pulled her into a tight embrace. 

“We need to get out of there Billy.” She said leaning in against his jacket. “I have no idea how, but we need to.” “Hang on just a little longer, luv. We’ll come up with something.”  

Then it hit her, “Ben...” she whispered, “What about him?” Billy pulled away to look at her. "He is our ticket to safety.” Bily shook his head. “No way, he is dangerous luv.”  

“No, he would want his son to be safe... He would want me safe, I know it.” “Homelander is his son too. He won’t choose.” Her eyes teared up.” Billy, please.” A single tear left her eyes. “I never asked for anything, please.” Despite Billy's past with him he was willing to look for him.  

Sarah did everything in her power to help search for him. But as weeks passed Homelander became more and more invested in Sarah and the child. “Decided on a name yet?” he asked her as he looked over the new born. “No.” was all she answered watching him closely.  

Meanwhile, Billy Butcher prowled the streets of New York, his rugged features etched with determination as he searched tirelessly for Soldier Boy. Billy was a force to be reckoned with, fuelled by vengeance and a burning desire to protect his daughter and grandson.  

Back in the confines of Vought Tower, Sarah's nerves were fraying with each passing moment. She knew she couldn't rely on rescue from the outside; her fate and that of her newborn rested solely on her own shoulders.  

She decided to search the Vought basements to find something to defend her and her baby boy. As she roamed the labyrinth underneath the tower she stumbled on to a box like she saw in Russia.  

Could it be?  

As she wanted to approach, she heard the doors opening, deciding to hide in the room a crossed the hall. Sarah noticed how Homelander walked in the room she just wanted to explore.  

“I really don’t understand why she so desperately needs you.” He said to himself “I mean, I could be as good as a father as you.” And then it hit her. He wasn’t talking to himself.  

“You will never see that child, you betrayed me like all of them. But don’t worry. I’ll take care of him.” As Homelander walked away all Sarah could hope is that he didn’t saw her in the other room.  

She waited an extra minute before walking back to the box. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw Ben. Time to wake up, sleeping beauty. She whispered while trying to open it.  

“Shit!” For some reason she couldn’t open the small vault he was in. “I can’t leave you here.” She thought for a second. ”Ben?” Sarah started “Can you hear me?” a small pause. “I don’t know if this would work, but... our baby boy is born.” 

“A little early but he is strong and healthy.”  

“I’m waiting on you to name him. You should see him Ben, he is so vibrant and beautiful. He sleeps really well, I guess he has that from is dad.” Sarah’s eyes started to tear up. “Please Ben fight. If not for me for your son.” Her hand placed on the box.  

Ben’s eyelids seemed to move slightly, but Sarah had no idea if it was her imagination or if he was trying to talk to her. “I’ll be back here. I promise I won’t leave you alone. I’m coming back, ok?”  

Another few days passed.  

Sarah tried to visit Ben as much as possible, hoping he could hear everything she said to him. She mostly talked about their son. “I was thinking, after all this we could move to the countryside? You me and the kid.” She tapped the box softly before kissing the glass softly.  

“Where did you go.” The familiar cold voice said while she got out of the elevator. Sarah’s heart skipped a beat. “Jeez Homelander, don’t sneak up on me like that.” She tried to sound as normal as possible.  

“I took a walk.” -” Alone?” he asked. “Uhu.” Sarah walked back to her room. “Where did you go?” Homelander followed close. “The eh, park.” - “Interesting, I would have sworn hearing you in the basement talking to Soldier Boy.  

Sarah’s feet stopped within the second, frozen to the floor. She wanted to explain everything, or at least made up a make-believe lie. But before she could say another word Homelander shoved her to the wall. His hands firm on her throat. 

“You made a foolish mistake Sarah. I gave you the chance to have a family. I told you we could be a family. But know you chose to let your kid to grow up without a mother.”  

Her eyes grew wide although she couldn’t respond. Homelander dropped her to the floor again. “I’m giving you one last chance Sarah...” But before he could finish that sentence, she kicked him in the balls as hard as she could and ran back to the elevator.  

Thank God she had practise with kick at least he was distracted for a moment. Just long enough for her to reach and close the elevator. Going down back to Ben. In full panic searching for something to break the glass. All she found was pinchers.  

Trying to cut the gas tube on Ben’s box. The gas stopped floating to his box, straight into the air. Making Sarah dizzy and faint next to the box on the floor. By the time she got by, she felt a pair of strong hand around her.  

Sarah looked up, seeing how Ben carried her out of the basement. “B-Ben?” -”Hi sweetheart. Try to stay awake, ok? You inhaled a lot of gas.” She tried to listen to his words but could only think of one thing before she black out again. “B-Ben.” she repeated.  

“Our son. Please...” her head fell back against his shoulder.  

-- 

“I don’t fucking care what you think! He is my fucking son and I’ll bust him out even if it’s the last thing I do.” Sarah heard Ben’s angry voice in a far distance. She tried to open her eyes, scanning the era.  

She was in an unfamiliar bedroom. Seeing how Ben and Billy were talking, or better yet, screaming outside. Annie walked in. “Oh, good you’re awake.” She smiled soft. “I brought you some food.”  

“What happened?” Sarah asked her. “You inhaled a lot of gas while saving Soldier Boy. You’ve been in and out of coma of the past five days.” She said in a soft voice. “F-five days?” Sarah felt the panic in her chest pressing down on her. 

“Oh god... Oh god...” - “hey, hey calm down. You need to calm down Sarah. BUTCHER!” She yelled trying to hold her back without hurting her.  

As Billy and Ben walked in her eyes flew straight to Ben. “Where is he?” He kneeled in front of her. “Sarah” Her sight blurred with tears. “T-tell me you got him out Ben...” She could see how his lips twitched trying to hold back his emotions.  

“TELL ME YOU GOT MY BABY!” Sarah’s anger and pain distracted her from thinking straight. Her fists hit his rock hard chest over and over. “I asked you! I begged you! GO fucking find him you piece of shit! Find my boy!”  

“Hey, hey, hey, Shh... look at me.” Ben at first let you release your anger at him before he tried to hold you down. “Look at me. I’ll find him Sarah I promise!” His large hand wrapped around her head pushing her close to him.  

Butcher saw how he held her in his arms. The embrace seemed to cool her down as they both sat on the floor. Ben whispering promises to her which she felt she didn’t needed.  

-- 

Sarah stood outside, in the garden of this lovely house surrounded by meadows. Without looking back, she could hear Ben’s footsteps. “Why?” She asked him still to giving him a look. “Why didn’t you go after him?”  

“I had to choose. You were already in my arms. I brought you out to fresh air and luckily I did or you would be dead. You spend almost an entire week in and out of a fucking coma.  

Sarah felt the tears in her eyes sting again.  

“I went back, you got to believe me. “His hands moved to her shoulders, he could feel how the tensed up, almost flinching at his touch, but not moving. “But he was gone and so was the baby. I burned that place down. As I will burn every fucking place, house or even store that he was in.” 

“Sarah?” Ben whispered trying to get her attention. “You should have saved him, then this wouldn’t happened.” “No but you would be dead.” Sarah turned to Ben and looked him dead in the eye. “Consider me dead if you don’t find him.” And walked back inside.  

--  

Finally, after some stone-cold days in the house Billy found a lead.  

To her surprise Billy didn’t want Sarah to come. “Are you out of your mind? He is my son Butcher! I’m the best human asset you have!” - “And that Luv is why you are staying home, you lose sight of the bigger picture, you lose your mind when it’s about him.”  

“No, the boys, myself and Ben. That’s it, end of fucking discussion.” Sarah looked at Ben who seemed to agree. “Since when do you two get along?!” she bit before turning her back to them.  

Minutes turned into hours. Annie volunteered to stay with her, in case the fight would come to them and moral support. She watched as Sarah walked nervous back and forward.  

Until... they hear the car doors slam. Sarah locked eyes with Annie. The women ran outside. “Where is he? Where are they?” Sarah asked in a whisper. seeing how they were all covered in blood and dust, Billy tapped her shoulder as the boys walk inside. “They’re in the car, bonding.” He kissed her head and left her alone.  

With small steps she approached the car, afraid? Nervous? Excited? She had no idea what the mixture of emotions was she felt. As she almost got to the car the back door opened. Ben got out holding their boy.  

Sarah could hold back her tears, seeing how their baby looked even smaller in his arms. “He is ok.” Ben reinsured. Sarah’s hand moved over his little head, her heart broke when she notice he already grew a little.  

“Thank you.” she said looking at their baby, but Ben knew it was for him. After a second Sarah’s eyes met his, she stood on her toes, holding her hand on his shoulder to close the space between their lips.  

A soft touch of their lips, a token of gratitude, an electric shock wave through their veins once their lips felt each other's. Sarah looking inside the car, noticing Ryan sitting in silence.  

“Hey buddy.” Sarah spoke in a sweeter than honey voice. “He helped us.” Ben said. “He is the reason we succeeded. I promised he could stay with us.” Sarah looked back at Ben. “Yes, yes of course.”  

"He took care of our boy while I fought Homelander. The kid is good." Ben said still not sure what Sarah thought of the situation. "Ryan, you are more than welcome to stay with us, you're save here." Sarah said.

-- -- --  

Sarah was feeding their baby boy on the porch of their house. Watching how Ryan and Ben are throwing the football. Billy walked over to his daughter "So, have you two came up with a name yet?"

Sarah smiled softy, “yes actually we did.” Ben walked closer, as Ryan hugged Billy. “Do you want to tell him?” She asked Ben. “It was your idea.” With his hand on her shoulder, she turns to her dad.  

“William Butcher, Grandad,” she started “Meet your grandson...” while handing him to Billy. 

“Lenny.”  

------------

If you liked this, please check out my masterlist for other stories.

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[jokeroutsubs]

Bojan on the cover of Astro Suzy, special summer edition of Suzy Magazine, focusing on astrology and spirituality. Scans and ENG Translation by: @kurooscoffee Cover Title:

Bojan Cvjetičanin: "We have a duty to change things for the better"

Article title:

We are driven by our love of life

WITH JOKER OUT, WE HAVE WITNESSED A MENTAL LEAP AND A SOCIAL PHENOMENON THAT WE HAVE LONGED FOR. THE BOYS GIVE HOPE THAT YOUNG PEOPLE ARE CONNECTING INTO A STRONG COMMUNITY THAT CARES ABOUT THE FUTURE, EVEN THOUGH PREVIOUS GENERATIONS HAVE LEFT THEM IN RUINS. IN A FLOOD OF STARLETS AND ARTIFICIALLY CREATED ONLINE INFLUENCERS, WE GOT ROLE MODELS WHO DON'T OFFER DISCOUNT CODES, BUT IMPORTANT MUSICAL MESSAGES ABOUT VALUES. IN THE MIDDLE OF A SLOVENIAN AND EUROPEAN TOUR, THE LEAD SINGER AND VISUAL OF THE BAND SHARED WITH US WHAT HE'S THINKING ABOUT, WHAT CAUSES HE'S STANDING BEHIND, AND WHY IT'S BENEFICIAL TO DEEPEN YOUR SPIRITUAL KNOWLEDGE. What are you thinking about as representatives of the new wave, the new generation? What is your attitude towards the dynamics in society, climate change, pervasive social networks, in short, everything that weighs on modern man? On the one hand, we ourselves are involved in all the processes that actively and continuously prolong the problems you are talking about. On the other hand, we are deeply aware of them and we are afraid of what is coming. It seems to me that in our generation the desire for change is very strong. There is a universal language of youth that has come together on the basis of feeling obliged and able to change things for the better. The song New Wave is about just that. We are ready to celebrate this common strength because we are encouraged by the idea that we are not alone. At the same time, we know that we are compelled to do something because someone before us has seriously 'fucked up'.

In your hit song 'Novi Val' (New Wave), already the very first verse has you wonder where to go from here. Do you know the answer?

If we want to do anything other than burn the horizon, the only way is towards community, away from egocentrism, with an onlook towards common good.

Let's stick to the anthem of the generation of love, as you named your peers and loyal supporters. The phrase 'We were born yesterday and everything is already our fault' is powerful and worrying. You have been given a pitiful lagecy by your ancestors. How do you defend yourself from taking a role of a victim and instead get actively involved in creating a brighter future?

Great question! It would be hard to change anything for the better if we put on the victim's cloak. The fact that in recent years it has become clear that there is a rebellion by people who have had enough is already a cause for optimism. When you put yourself in the role of the one who carries a scepter as a synonym of the leader of change, you move away from being a victim. And each one of us in this community carries it. In reality, we are taking the position that society is currently a victim and it is our task to defend it.

How?

We all contribute in our own way. The role of musicians is to connect people with positive messages. So by constantly reminding people about friendship, love and other social components that can be tapped into through music. In Slovenia, we have a lot of organisations that are trying to change the situation for the better in many different ways. It does not require much to at least educate oneself about what these organisations are doing. I have the feeling that many people would like to get involved and help. At the end of grammar school and at college, we were encouraged to find out about collective organisations. It was clear to them that many people would want to join of their own initiative once they knew what they stood for. I know many former classmates who are very active members and supporters of various movements. Even if we minimise our own negative energy on social networks, it is a big step towards a good state of society, and of mind.

(picture 1: Family Cvjetićanin knows how to stick together)

You seem to care about a world that is increasingly drowning in chaos. You have become idols, not only of young people, but also of their parents. Is this a burden of responsibility or does it encourage you do even more activism?

It's a great feeling when the little ones take you for an idol. As a teenager, it was also inspiring to be surrounded by the music of Big Foot Mama and Siddharta. It gave me a message in a language that I could not compare with anything else. But our creativity does not depend on what people think of us or how they perceive us. But it is a great honour to know that you are one of those who encourage someone. Many people are listening, but not hearing. Joker Out is made up of five individuals who, in real life, when the cameras and the spotlights are off, are just normal guys. We went through all the processes of growing up on the streets, socialising and playing. We went through the process of going to school, and we were not problematic adolescents. Even today, our most extreme departure from an ideal is what 99% of young people do. To party sometimes. We are not outlaws by nature.

Your work is a beacon of light, a source of hope and strength. Many have done it before you, especially the Beatles. A lot has changed since their era, much of it unfortunately for the worse. How do you keep optimistic? Why is it worth the effort?

Every musician in history who has sung about ending war and living for love has failed miserably. I believe that at least those people who follow the messenger are convinced of peace and love. If every musician encourages someone to to do so, it's a hefty amount of opponents of hate. We are driven forward by love for life.

Writing texts is a responsible job, and you are baring your soul at the same time. Where is the line, to what lengths are you willing to go to protect the most vulnerable part of yourself?

I have never consciously inhibited the process of looking inside myself. But I feel that with age and experience I understand more and more what can lead me to a deeper state of mind. In the beginning I didn't dare to dig into myself. Today I have no problem in fully exposing my feelings, because they are, after all, states that happen of their own accord - and it is impossible to force them

(picture 2: The boys of Joker Out became even closer)

No Slovenian artist has enjoyed such a fierce international success as Joker Out. Concerts in iconic European clubs are literally sold out in hours, even minutes. How do you accept fame? Is it a blessing or is there also a bit of fear?

There are certainly Slovenian musicians with international experience. Maybe not at our age, but that doesn't take away from their importance. We have achieved a very nice success here in terms of listeners, we have honed our skills and we have grown with the band as a collective. We have grasped who and what we are as a whole. We are a group of people who make music purely because we really enjoy it. Whatever feelings our music-making evokes, it all comes from us in the most sincere way, Fortunately, our music is liked by a larger crowd and we have managed to transmit our unforced joy, happiness, joy across national borders. There is no better catalyst for such a breakthrough than Eurovision, we chose the moment to participate wisely. It paid off as a successful project, because for a good band it doesn't matter which part of the world it comes from. It's important to be heard - and we were heard by a lot of people. The only thing that has changed so far is that the bonds between us have strengthened. Suddenly we have been forced to talk about emotions and experiences that we did not have before. There has been a lot of filtering of unfamiliar feelings. The desire to create increased a thousandfold for all five of us.

Are you aware of the role that the public attributes to you, to act as a beacon of light in a crowd of frustrated, bitter people?

No. I would hardly say that I can understand that. Every time I hear something like that, it strikes me that it is saying too much. I really cannot think of myself in such a strong context.

You are giving yourself away. You are constantly on the road, interviews, concerts, promotional tours. It's exhausting. How do you recover? What calms you down, fills you with grace?

It's true that we give a lot of ourselves. But we get so much more in return. Nothing calms me more than coming home and being close to my family. And of course the company of Kris, Jan, Jure and Nace. The people we were with friends before this euphoria, have stayed with us, this team surround us with a lot of love.

(picture 3: He's noticing, that young people are connecting into a strong community that cares about the future)

As a front-man and lyricist, you are even more exposed. You've crossed the magical 200 thousand followers on Instagram, which is a mega number, but also a mega stressful situation. Most young people who find themselves in such a situation turn to intoxicating substances. Can you consciously stop and say that you need time for yourself?

The only thing that made me a bit anxious was the sudden exposure to such a large audience'on social media. This brings with it unimaginable dimensions of human imagination, including malice. Imaginary stories emerge in which people literally compete to see who can come up with something more bizarre. This stress got to me at the beginning, because I felt that I had to defend myself in front of the public. In the end, I realised that I didn't need to convince anyone and that it was enough to know the truth. With the help of colleagues who have similar experiences, I have calmed down. As for the substances, I have a natural protection against those, because I am an incorrigible hypochonder. I dare not take an aspirin unless it is really urgent. Above all, I know when to stop.

You come from a close-knit, loving family. That is certainly a solid foundation on which to build your personality. What is their view of everything that happens to you?

They are very proud! Of all my achievements and of me for being able to pull off a music career combined with the academic milestone of graduating. My parents and my grandmother are definitely my biggest supporters. They accompany me on my journey with warnings, but they are more about eating regularly, to not get a stomach ache, to consume enough water and to get enough sleep. I have been chronically lacking the latter in the last few weeks.

What is your relationship to astrology, esotericism, in short, something that is intangible but can be felt?

Superstition is the one I use the most. For Eurovision I had a special pair of underpants and I was haunted by the feeling that if I didn't wear them, everything would go to hell. Jan's mum gave me a lace clover, which I didn't dare leave in Ljubljana. I asked the stylist to sew it on my outfit as a precaution. I got a clay horseshoe from a little girl, and it went with me to Liverpool. It will seem strange to some, but I believe in energies and ghosts.

How do you strengthen your spiritual side?

Not very well. I wish I had managed to acquire more spiritual knowledge in the last year. For example, basic meditation techniques and the laws of yoga, because I am definitely not physically active enough. The feeling of being 90 years old eats up most of my spirit. My back hurts all the time. The best thing I do for inner growth is to read books. Not enough, but I'm going to get better. A little less phone scrolling and more self-reflection, that'll do the job! Author: Tomaž Mihelič, PHOTO: VITA OREHEK

Scans and translation by: @kurooscoffee (jokeroutsubs) DO NOT REPOST!