#why do you have to lie and make up another one

[moonstruckme]

hai lovie!!! im not sure of youve written something like this for emt!marauders yet but could you write something where they come home from work to reader lying on the floor on the hallway due to having low blood pressure and shed tried to go get something to eat or something but had started feeling faint and had to lie down? and then when they come up to reader she starts to cry because being unwell makes her anxious (im not fussed if you dont add that last part up to you <3). i had really low blood pressure the other day and bad to lie on the floor for a good two hours and it really stressed me out :< anyway thanks lovie i hope youre doing well !!!!

Thanks for requesting <3

cw: mention of dizziness, nausea, worries about being alone when unwell and also being unwell in general

emt!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words

You’re half propped up with your elbow on a step when you hear the front door open. 

“Hello?” 

“Hello!” comes James’ chipper reply, followed by Sirius’ groan and the clunking of shoes as he no doubt kicks them off, beelining for the couch. After a moment of you not appearing to greet them, James asks, “Where are you?” 

“I’m—here.” You soften your voice when Sirius walks by the stairs, his step faltering as he locks eyes with you. 

His eyebrows bunch, concerned before he really knows why. “What’re you doing?” 

“I’m…” You shrug limply, trying on a helpless smile. Tears threaten to spill over from the way your eyes squish up. “I don’t feel right.” 

Sirius has only taken his first, slow step toward you, bemusement written across his features, before James and Remus are behind him at the base of the stairs. 

“Oh. Hi, angel.” James’ voice matches his expression, all gentleness, and worry hidden beneath counterfeit cheer. “Having a little lie down?” 

“Yeah,” you say. Sirius’ touch is a relief as he reaches you. He cups your face and feels your forehead, brows stitched together. You’re happy to be in capable hands. “I started to fall, so I just laid down here. I’m a bit dizzy.” 

There’s only so many of you that can fit on the stairs. James makes it to you next, crouching beside Sirius to take your hand in his and press his fingers to your pulse, so Remus is left peering over them both. He frowns, looking conflicted about his inability to help and worried in general. You try another smile for his sake; unfortunately, this time, the tears do spill. 

“Hey, don’t do that,” Sirius says, no real chiding in his tone as he knuckles them from your cheeks. 

“Sorry.” You force yourself to breathe, but new ones come anyway. It’s a slow sort of cry, the result of a good long while feeling sorry for yourself. “I just, I felt sick, so I tried to go upstairs to the toilet, but then I started to faint and I didn’t think I could make it back down to my phone, and I didn’t know when you would be home, or if anyone would find me…” 

“We’re here now, though, sweetheart,” Remus stops you gently. “It all worked out alright. You’re okay.” 

“Yeah.” You wipe underneath your eyes. “I think my blood pressure just dropped all of a sudden or something, but I still feel weird. It was scary.” 

“I think you’re right,” James says. He runs his thumb over your wrist. “I mean, I’d like to think it’s just because we’re home and you’re pleased to see us, but your heart’s going pretty fast, m’love. How long ago did you lie down here?” 

“I don’t know,” you reply, sniffling, feeling silly. “I don’t have my phone. Less than an hour, I think.” 

Remus hums. “That’s still a long while.” 

Honestly, you feel better just having your boyfriends here with you. Partly because of the security, of course, that you know you won’t faint and hit your head with no one to help you, but also, perhaps, there’s a small part of you that enjoys their fussing. The concerned set of Sirius’ brow, the way Remus’ mouth puckers thoughtfully, how James keeps rubbing his thumb over your wrist like he can soothe your heart back into its regular rhythm. 

“Well, then.” Sirius pats your hip, rising from his crouch. “Not much point in figuring it all out here, is there? C’mon, pretty girl, that step has to be killing your side.” 

It’s true; you think the edge of the step probably leaves an indent in your waist after you let Sirius haul you up, supporting you down the stairs and over to the couch. 

“I don’t feel as dizzy as I was expecting,” you admit. “Maybe I was overreacting.” 

“You?” Sirius exclaims, feigning astoundment. 

“Better to be safe,” says Remus. He claims a spot next to you quickly, as though seizing his opportunity. It makes your lips tug. “I’m glad you were careful, love.” 

You lean your head on his shoulder in a silent plea for coddling; he appeases you, pressing his lips to your hair while Sirius pinches the skin of your forearm gently. You watch him with mild interest. 

“When was the last time you drank water?” he asks. 

“Um…” You think back. 

Sirius lets go of your skin and tuts. “Yeah, seems like it’s been long enough for you not to remember.” 

“On it,” James announces, coming back from the kitchen with a large glass of water. He passes it to you over the back of the couch, and it’s so full a tiny bit spills over the rim onto your wrist, making you shiver. “It’s more common than you’d think for dehydration to do that to you. Gotta be careful.” 

“Yes,” says Remus drily, though his arm comes around your shoulders. “Rather easily avoidable.” 

You shrink, mumbling, “Sorry,” into your glass. 

James awws and bends over the back of the couch to plant a kiss on your head, his good cheer restored, genuinely now. “We all forget sometimes, lovie.” 

“Don’t enable her,” Sirius tells him. He cradles your arm in his hand, stroking the skin he’d pinched as though in apology for his treatment of it. “Don’t listen to him. It’s a grave oversight and you must repent forever.” 

“Forever?” Your smile still feels weak, but you’re coming back to yourself some. “How will I do that?” 

“Mm,” Sirius takes to kissing your arm instead, mumbling with a sternness that borders upon silly, “start with filling your water bottle every day before leaving the house, and at least three times after that.” 

You go quiet, gaze sliding to Remus skeptically. 

He raises an eyebrow. “What?” 

“Is that…really how much I’m supposed to have?”

His other eyebrow lifts, too. “Yes.” 

“Every day?” 

“Yes.” Remus laughs, exasperated. “Yes, that’s the water intake your body needs.” 

“There’s no way everyone’s doing that.” 

“They’re not,” James agrees. “Instead, everyone is getting dizzy and calling us so we can go pick them up from halfway up the stairs.” 

You bring the glass back to your lips, muttering, “I didn’t call, you just found me.” 

James kisses your head again, fiercely. “And we always will, lucky girl.”

[littlecorspe]

Everyone in the reblogs & tags is dogging on this random for not having voted for Harris, for making her own grave and not being happy to lie in it, for being "arrogant" in thinking the democrats should do anything about the state of our country after she didn't vote for them etc. etc.

And I feel like this kind of behaviour proves the point of people like this?

I could be completely wrong, she could literally just be a psyop (and I think that's what's most likely tbh) lmao, but I feel like this was the take of a lot of people who were disillusioned w the party they would have otherwise been voting for.

And if that party's response to losing the election is "boo hoo, we lost & it's actually your fault & now we're all on a sinking ship & we're just gonna watch & do nothing about it because boohoo we lost" It shows precisely just another reason why people would be disillusioned with it.

And then so much of the stuff said in the tags just shines with hypocrisy? "You just don't care enough about women to disregard all the other unsatisfactory shit and that makes you selfish." Uhhh, okay, by that point, you don't care enough about Palestinian lives, or other xyz group or issue to disregard all the other unsatisfactory shit & are being selfish, like??? That just puts yall on two sides of the same coin, no one is right here?

& then the people who are like "Where is your precious Jill Stein?" Like? 💀

Where is our girlboss Kamala rn? Paying someone to update her website?

Why is your argument "Go to Jill Stein" but the same standard can't be expected from the candidate you voted for? To step up and do something, even though they lost the election?

Are they equal candidates that both equally deserved votes, thus we should be holding the two to the same standard?

Or was Harris clearly the better of the two candidates; thus we should be holding her and the democratic party to a higher standard & expect them to be doing more than they are right now?

I just fucking hate that the response of this fucking party is to cry about losing, and then be satisfied to sit around and point fingers at meaningless civilians while the country literally burns around them, instead of continuing to push for change & improvement, and ask for more from their party, even if they did lose the election.

Someone in the reblogs was like "my family lived through WWII and they knew if you didn't vote for the lesser of 2 evils you were voting for the nazis" and I bet they also knew that if the nazis won, the next step would be to collect themselves, wipe their tears away, and then pick themselves up by their bootstraps and get to work on doing whatever they could to resist, and to minimize the damage to come. Sitting around and pointing fingers for the next four years would not have been an option.

[lvrsatoru]

╭ pairing ⸺ gojo satoru x reader

╭ drabble ⸺ 1.8k, before his final fight with sukuna, gojo reunites with someone he thought had been long gone </3 sorry in advance luvs

𐙚 december 24th, age 28

she’s standing in front of him.

she’s standing in front of him.

she’s standing in front of him.

his mind loops over the thought, unable to process it, unable to accept it. his six eyes tell him it’s real—she’s real—every fiber of his being tuned to the cursed energy signature he knows better than his own.

but it can’t be.

because he was 23 when he kissed her goodbye for the last time. because he was 23 when he got the call, when he read the report, when he stared at the empty space where her body should’ve been.

because forever had lasted less than a year.

and yet—

“satoru,” she whispers, hesitant, careful.

his name in her voice sends a violent shudder through him.

his infinity is still up. she hasn’t touched him. she can’t.

but he feels her anyway.

it’s muscle memory, instinct. his body still reacts to her, still leans toward her even as his mind tells him to run.

he doesn’t.

but he doesn’t move forward, either.

she takes another slow step, like she’s afraid he’ll bolt.

“you look different,” she says, soft but teasing, a poor attempt at levity.

his throat is too tight to respond.

her gaze drifts over him, and the weight of it makes his skin prickle, makes him aware of how much he has changed.

his hair is shorter now, with the undercut he gave himself one night, after she’d left. he’s leaner, stronger, his body hardened by war and loss and time.

but she—she looks like she’s lived, like she has known something beyond grief and battle and the never-ending ache of survival.

and it makes him feel sick.

like she’s had years he wasn’t a part of. like she kept going while he stood still.

like the dead had the audacity to age.

“where the hell have you been?” his voice comes out strangled, hoarse, barely a whisper.

her expression shifts, guilt flashing across her face before she can hide it.

“satoru—”

“where have you been?” louder, harsher this time.

she flinches.

and it kills him, because she’s not supposed to flinch at him.

she takes another step forward, cautious, careful.

his infinity is still up.

she stops.

“you’re not real,” he says flatly, more to himself than to her.

she blinks, startled. “what?”

“you’re not real. you’re a trick. a clone. a shapeshifter. an illusion.” he lists them off mechanically, like if he keeps saying it, it’ll become the truth.

but his six eyes don’t lie.

and neither does the ache in his chest.

she swallows, and for the first time, he sees the fear in her eyes.

but it’s not fear of him.

it’s fear for him.

he hates it.

he hates that she still looks at him like that. like he’s something fragile, like she’s worried he’s about to fall apart.

because he is.

he is, and she knows it.

she’s always known.

“satoru, it’s me,” she says, voice softer now, and god, it sounds like home.

he shakes his head.

no.

no, no, no, no

this is cruel.

this is so fucking cruel.

“you died,” he says, as if saying it aloud will make it true again.

her face crumples, and he has to look away, has to stare at the ground because if he meets her eyes, he’s going to break.

“i had to leave,” she whispers.

his jaw clenches.

“you left,” he repeats, voice hollow.

she hesitates. “i—”

“you left.”

his infinity flickers.

just for a second.

just long enough for her to step forward, just enough for her to lift a hand to his face—

just enough for her fingers to brush against his skin.

he shatters.

the breath rushes out of him like he’s been struck. his legs feel weak. his hands, which have been clenched into fists, loosen, tremble.

her hand is warm, so impossibly warm.

it has been five years since someone has touched him like this.

since she has touched him like this.

he wants to pull away, wants to shove her back and demand why, why, why, why she thought she had the right to do this, to touch him, to stand here in front of him like she hadn’t been a ghost for half a decade.

but he doesn’t.

he can’t.

he leans into it instead, his face tilting into her palm like it’s instinct, like he has no choice in the matter.

and maybe he doesn’t

maybe he never has.

“you left,” he whispers, softer this time, the fight draining out of him as quickly as it had come.

“i’m sorry.”

it’s so quiet he barely hears it.

but he feels it.

feels the tremor in her hand, the way her thumb brushes against his cheekbone, the way her fingers tighten against his skin like she’s afraid he might slip away.

like he’s the ghost.

“you left me,” he repeats, because it’s the only thing he can hold onto, the only thing that makes sense in all of this.

“i know.”

“you—” his voice breaks, and he hates himself for it, hates the way his shoulders shake, hates the way he can’t stop leaning into her.

her forehead rests against his, and he squeezes his eyes shut, his breath coming out shaky and uneven.

“i know,” she whispers again, her voice cracking.

his hands move on their own, gripping her waist, holding her there.

he shouldn’t.

he shouldn’t.

but he does.

he clutches her like she might disappear again, like she might slip through his fingers if he lets go.

she wraps her arms around him.

and that’s when he breaks.

a sound leaves him—something between a sob and a laugh, something raw and guttural and helpless—and he buries his face in her shoulder, his whole body trembling.

she smells the same.

she feels the same.

but everything else is different.

he is different.

“i thought i was getting better,” he breathes. “i thought i—I thought I was moving on.”

“i know,” she says, holding him tighter.

“i wasn’t.”

“i know.”

he swallows, his throat tight, his hands clenching at the fabric of her clothes.

“i still love you,” he admits, and it feels like surrender, like defeat.

she exhales, a shaky, broken thing, and pulls back just enough to cup his face again.

“i still love you too,” she whispers.

it’s unfair.

it’s so fucking unfair.

because she’s here.

but she won’t be for long.

and he’s about to die.

they stay like that for a long time, wrapped up in each other, both afraid to let go. he clings to her, hands curled into the fabric at her waist, like if he holds on tight enough, time will stop, and none of this will matter.

but he knows better.

time has never been kind to him.

“you have to go, don’t you?” he murmurs.

she stiffens.

he pulls back just enough to look at her, to search her face for answers, and god—he hates that she looks guilty.

“tell me,” he says, voice quiet but firm.

she bites her lip, hesitates.

and that alone is enough to set him off.

he pulls back entirely now, hands falling from her like she’s burned him.

“don’t,” he snaps. “don’t look at me like that. like you already know how this ends.”

“satoru—”

“don’t.”

she exhales, looks away.

and fuck, it’s happening again, isn’t it? she’s leaving again.

“why?” he demands. “why now? why show up just to—” he stops himself before he can say it, before he can put words to the fear clawing at his throat.

just to leave me again.

she steps forward again, hesitant, like she’s unsure if she’s still allowed.

but his infinity is still down.

he hates himself for it.

“there are things i can’t tell you,” she says finally, and he wants to scream.

“that’s bullshit.”

her jaw tightens. “it’s the truth.”

he laughs, sharp and humorless, runs a hand through his hair in frustration.

“i spent five years thinking you were dead,” he says, voice low, almost trembling. “five years, and you come back just to—just to what? tell me there are things you can’t tell me? give me some cryptic half-truths and expect me to accept it?”

“it’s not that simple.”

“it never is with you.”

she winces.

it makes him feel sick.

“do you think this is easy for me?” she asks, voice cracking.

he stares at her, and for the first time since he’s seen her again, he lets himself really look.

her hair is longer, her face a little older. she carries herself differently now, like someone who’s had to live a life she never wanted.

it hits him then—she didn’t want this, either.

but it doesn’t make it any easier.

“why did you come back?” he asks, quiet now, all the fight drained out of him.

she takes a shaky breath.

“because you’re about to fight sukuna,” she says.

his stomach drops.

he had almost forgotten.

almost.

the weight of the truth settles in his chest.

she came back because she knows.

“you think I’m going to lose,” he says flatly.

her eyes are glassy, but she doesn’t deny it.

his breath catches.

“i don’t—” he swallows, shakes his head. “i don’t know how to do this.”

she reaches for him again, and this time, he lets her.

her fingers trail over his cheek, down his jaw, feather-light and devastating.

“neither do i,” she whispers.

and suddenly, he hates her for this.

for coming back, for giving him this sliver of something just to take it away again.

but he can’t be angry.

because she’s here.

she’s here.

and it’s the cruelest thing the universe has ever done to him.

“stay,” he says, and it’s not a demand—it’s a plea.

she swallows hard, her thumb brushing over his cheekbone.

“i can’t.”

his hands tighten on her waist, his chest aching so badly he can hardly stand it.

“please.”

she shakes her head, her own tears slipping free now.

“i can’t,” she says again, and it shatters him.

he presses his forehead to hers, closes his eyes, breathes her in.

because this is all he gets.

a stolen moment before the end.

she holds him just as tightly.

“i love you,” she whispers.

his breath hitches.

“i still love you,” she says, voice breaking. “i never stopped.”

his chest cracks open at that, something deep inside him splintering beyond repair.

his grip tightens, fingers digging into her like he can carve her into his skin, like he can keep her here.

he doesn’t say it back.

because it’s never been a question.

because of course he loves her.

of course he does.

he always has.

he always will.

but she’s already slipping away.

and he lets her go.

[envy-of-the-apple]

I've been reading all your jjk works and notice most of them having older mc. You wrote gojo with an older woman a lot, how about doing geto with middle age jujutsu teacher

Mc is not strong and barely considered a jujutsu sorcerer with her ct that basically numbs her or others senses like a potent anesthetic, its not really useful in a fight but the best thing for geto. With her ct she can numb his taste buds completely and he never has to taste the disgusting curse ball ever again. And plus mc is actually a really nice and caring teacher. The kind of teacher that uses different study methods to suit different students. The kind of teacher that immediately pick up when students are feeling down. But when geto expresses how much he is fond of her not just as her student she takes it as puppy love that he will soon get over it when he gets older and she only saw him as her student. She said something like "maybe when you graduate we can have this talk again" and geto took it to heart only for his beloved teacher getting purpose from other people(non-sorcer that you happened to help one time). Oh... How sad he is... He thought you would wait for him. And you would finally become part of his family with nanako and mimiko after all you help him raise both of them why are you leaving for some Monkey

I like this idea! But what about making the Mc a nurse instead???

(TW: Blood, implied murder, yandere)

You aren’t even a trained jujutsu sorcerer. You were scouted pretty late, far past high school. Because of that, you don’t have much potential, not that you were upset or anything. You’re still a high school nurse, but instead of treating students with the occasional flu, you treat teenagers who fight demons.

It’s pretty haunting to see, especially as an outsider of jujutsu. But you can’t do anything. You might be semi-important to the school, but you’re still just another rung on the ladder. So you keep your head down, as you always do.

It’s only natural you develop favorites. It’s a second year. Shoko Ieiri. She’s set to be your predecessor, having a much more powerful CT than you do. You don’t mind being in her shadow. The short time you spent in the jujutsu world was hard enough. At least now you know you wont be leaving behind a hole.

Geto is close behind. He’s a quiet boy, well-mannered, well-spoken. Far better than his white haired brat of a companion. It isn’t often he comes for injuries, but when accidents do happen, you’re sure to lecture him while tending to his injuries.

Maybe one day you get curious enough to ask what curses taste like. Maybe that day, he finally decides to be honest.

On tinier areas, like the tongue, your CT can last for hours. You try it out just once when he’s called to dispatch a first grade. He comes back that day with eyes brighter than anything you’ve ever seen.

It continues like that. When he’s called for an exorcism, he finds you. It’s like a goodbye ritual. You and him sit on the exam table, his mouth open wide as you diligently apply your curse technique, careful not to miss a single corner. He often tells you that you saved his life. You didn’t know he meant that so sincerely.

He confesses to you a year after Riko’s death.

Hes like a kid. He is a kid, staring down at you with hopeful eyes, not even a day over 18. You know what you should do. Rip the band-aide off, nice and clean. He deserves that.

But...you just cant break his heart like that, so you lie.

You tell him when he's older. You tell him after graduation. You tell him to wait. He readily does. You hope in a couple years hed be too embarrassed to ask you again. His adult brain would kick in and nag at him. His friends might too. Maybe when he comes back as a fully-fledged sorcerer, you two could laugh about this.

Your last straw is Haibara.

You quit the school. you walk away from jujutsu sorcery. It's hard, because its been your life for years, but leaving hurts less than staying.

You don't tell geto. You just leave. Abandon him.

You go back to your old job. A normal high school, treating normal high school students. Years pass like that. You move on with your normal life.

And then you meet a normal man. Quiet, well-mannered, the ever slightest gray in his hair. He's perfect. When he gives you the ring, it was the happiest you'd ever been.

Geto finds you two years after your marriage.

It's almost surreal meeting him again, seeing him in your quiet apartment. There's so much blood. His fingers are dripping in it.

He smiles. "So, had time to think it over?"

You were half right. One day, Geto did come back as a full-fledged sorcerer.

But neither of you laughed about it.

[rainix13]

It's Okay

masterlist

inspiration was this by @mommyownsmee

Natasha Romanoff x Agent!Reader

words: ~2k

description: after a few exhausting days and not talking about it, it gets too much to comprehend at last

Genre: angst / comfort (mostly comfort I think??)

Warnings: angst, mental breakdown, not really edited/proof read

It's litteraly 7am and I haven't slept yet, my brain is cooked

I don't know if anything makes sense

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𓅨⋆｡°✩✮ ⋆ ˚｡⋆｡°✩｡⋆｡✮ ⋆ ˚｡⋆｡°✩✮ ⋆ ˚｡𓅨⋆｡°✩

Sighing you entered your shared appartment, bringing the groceries straight to the kitchen.

"Baby?" the familar voice came from the office and despite your exhaustion immediately a smile makes it's way to your lips.

You hung your coat over a nearby chair and before you could even turn around, two strong arms wrapped around your waist.

"Hey Natty" you murmured, letting yourself melt against her. "How was your day?"

The redhead grunted in response and adds "Paperwork and recruits."

You chuckled, knowing exactly what she means. You had them just before they went to training with Natasha.

"How was your day princess?" She asks kissing your shoulder.

You turned around , letting your arms hanging loosley around her neck "Was goood"

"Mh, you look exhausted" she stated between to short kisses but you shooke your head.

"Not more than usual" You lied with a smile. It's an easy lie, a casual one. Not necessary but you didn't want to ruin her good mood. And Natasha bought it.

After another quick peck you pulled away completely. "I'm just gonna take a quick shower and then I'll make dinner, okay?"

"Okay, I'll finish my work 'til then. What are you cooking?"

"Pasta!" You shouted over your shoulder, already halfway in the bathroom.

As the hot water runs down your body it felt like everything just washed off. The build up exhaustion faded as you stepped out of the shower, leaving you with something raw. Something that made you balance so close to the edge of a mental breakdown even you began to notice it. You sighed, somehow hoping to get rid of that weight that makes it hard to breath. You looked up, in the mirrior meeting your own empty eyes. Natasha was right, you do look exhausted. Like something drained the last bit off energy from your body. And if you were honest with yourself, you'd know that that's also exactly how you've felt for the last few days. But instead you've drowned that in even more work and exhaustion so it couldn't surface. Not until now at least.

A familiar dizziness formed in your head and you had to sit down. Have you eaten today? Yes, you had a sandwich for lunch. Or was that yesterday? No. Nevermind, it was yesterday.

Stop that's not relevant, you want to breathe. Why did that exhaustion suppress everything else? Why does this come up now? Can your emotions chill for a second? Can your mind please chill the fuck out? Why is this happening now? You need to get up again. You've got things to do. Why do your thoughts feel so loud. Just shut u-

"You alright angel?" Natasha's concerned voice pulled you out of your own thoughts immediately. You eyes snapped up to her standing in the door looking down at you on the floor.

"Uh yeah. J-just sound zoned out a bit" you desperately tried to safe it but your voice was far too shaky to appear convincing. Even if you're voice didn't give you away, you're trembling hands probably would have.

Natasha said nothing, instead she walked over, pulled you on your feet and into a hug. Instinctively you bury your head in her chest, holding in to her as the dizziness came back almost immediately.

Your senses all focused on her now. The faint scent of vanilla mixed with her shampoo. How you felt her breath against your scalp, her hands on your back and in your hair. You heard her breathing. You closed your eyes, trying to let her presence ground you. Tried to let everything overtune your own thoughts.

"What's wrong hun?" the pure softness and concern in her voice were the last straw to make everything fall apart.

Hot tears almost immediately streamed down your face, you buried your face in her neck and clutched onto her shirt. An unwanted sob escaped you and before you realized it would happen, your body collapsed against the redhead. She reacted immediately, picking you up, holding you as close as possible.

Natasha carried you to your shared bed, laying down with you still in her arms. Her heart broke at how small and helpless you seemed to be. How broken your sobs sounded and how desperately you hold on to her. Like you feared she mights disappeare if you'd let go.

"Just breathe, I'm here" she whispers. You try to follow her deep breaths and after a few tries you're starting to get there. Your breathing was still short and shaky between your sobs but less ragged now. "Overstim-" your voice broke off into another sob and Natasha tries to pull you even closer. "It's okay, I understand" You knew she did. It's not the first time you were at the verge of breaking down because people were just too much in that moment and it wasn't the first time Natasha was there to keep you in touch with reality. It was the first time you had a breakdown, especially that bad tho. The first time she had to see you like this and you didn't appreciate that. She wasn't supposed to see you like this, you're supposed to be there for her when she needed you.

While she got up and left you for a second, you went down that spiral, getting stuck in a cycle of 'Get your shit together' and 'She deserves better'.

But a moment later, before you can get too far with those thoughts on your own the redhead came back, helping you to put on one of her hoodies before she pulled you back into her embrace.

"What do you need angel?"

"B-being alone-" you choked out and Natasha immediately retreated. Not rushed but without hesitation until you held her back and she met your pleading eyes. "w-with you? i-if than m-makes sense" you asked unsure. Part of you didn't want her stay, didn't want her to see you like this. But the stronger oart craved the feeling of safety and acceptance. Craved the way she could ground you and keep you in touch with reality. She nodded, getting back to you "Don't worry, it makes sense. We can be alone together," she reassured you. She was glad you wanted her with you. Glad you trusted her enough to be so openly vulnerable.

You were hit immediately with gratitude but when you tried to speak again you're choking in your own sobs again, slowly growing annoyed at your own inability to exist. Natasha noticed the way your muscles tensed at the failed attempt, she could almost feel you slip away again.

"shh it's okay. You're safe with me"

"I-I it's just too much suddenly. The past days were so exhausting a-and I don't know. I kept it going and e-everything went okay a-and no one noticed" you finally managed to say.

"I've got you, don't worry" Natasha said, pulling you even closer to her, if that's even humanly possible, for a short moment.

"It's just so sudden. I- I-"

"shh it's okay. Just breath, mkay?" she created just enough distance to look you in the eyes "In and out, yeah?"

You take a shaky breath, hands still holding on to the redhead's hoodie as if your life depends on it.

She just holds you tight, one hand softly combing through your hair.

She knows that you don't actually want to talk right now, that words don't make it better. She knows that hearing things would just add to the chaos in your head. So she just holds you, letting you breath her in until you calmed down again. You close your eyes and relax. Her even heartbeat, her scent, her hand on your back. All of her grounded you and finally shuts down the thoughts in your head. You knew she wants to say that she loves you and that it's alright. And she knew that you can feel everything she didn't verbalize.

You let yourself dwell in the feeling of safety as your own heartbeat normalizes again.

"Thank you" you mumured softly, taking a last deep breath before you untangle your legs from hers and want to get up.

"Where are you going?" Natasha holds you back and searches for your eyes.

"Making dinner, Nat. Haven't cooked yet" you explain and try to loosen the grip the redhead has on you but to your surprise she pulls you back, and wraps her arms around you, your back now pressed against her.

"It's okay, Nat. Just dinner" you softly argue, your voice still hoarse from crying.

"Stop being my over independent strong girl for now okay? I love you. Let me take care of you today" she pleads, her nose burried in your neck. You hate worrying her, adding to the stress she already has.

You sighed in defeat and nod "Okay. But I'm fine, really"

Natasha just huffed, picked you up and throwed you over her shoulder. "Nat let me dooown"

But she shook her head "mmh no, your my little princess" You can hear the satisfied smile on her lips, making you giggle. "Nattyyy" You try to wiggle out of her grip, still laughing and finally she obliges. "Okay, okay stop moving"

She sits you on the counter, pressing a quick kiss on your nose. "You stay here, I make some pasta" leaving no room for an argument.

So you just watch her, sitting on the counter, dangling your legs. How she moved so effortlessly. In a strange way her calculated but simple movements like chopping onions or just stirring the sauce made you calm down even more. You began to feel the slight burn in your eyes from crying, the actual softness of Natasha's hoodie and how ut smelled exactly like her. The stress began to fade, letting you breathe again.

After you ate you end up in bed again, watching some show you didn't really pay attention to. Your head was buried in Natasha's chest still craving every bit of comforting, grounding touch. "I love you" you whisper so quiet you're not sure Natasha could hear it. Any maybe that wouldn't be so bad because you know that she's able to detect the silent apology with it

But of course she did. She pulled you closer once again, her hand finding it's way to your hair combing through it. "It's okay angel. Just...try not to overdo yourself, okay? You don't need to handle everything on your own" You sigh at the statement, burying yourself deeper in your girlfriends hoodie. "But I should. Especially when it's just fixing something that's my fault anyway. And it's okay. I can handle it ...most days" Your breath turned hot and tears welled up in your eyes again. "I should." You add, angry at yourself.

"That's not true" The redhead pulls away and cups your cheeks, forcing you to make eye contact.

"No one can handle everything on their own. We're a team, remember? You help me all the time. Patch me up. Mentally and physically. So why wouldn't I be here to do the same for you?"

"Because you already have your own stuff to deal with..." You mumble hesitantly. You don't want to be a burden. You don't want to annoy her with your stuff. Not when you can or at least should be able to handle it on your own.

Natasha sighs, pulling you back in. "Did or would you ever not listen to me or try and help me just because you have your own things?"

"No..." you reply not sure how to explain that it's different then.

"Will you tell me when it gets too much next time?"

You take a deep breath, tightening your grip around the redheads waist. "I'll try"

"Thank you angel"

"I love you" you said, this time not saying it as an apology.

"I love you too" Natasha answered.

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𓅨⋆｡°✩✮ ⋆ ˚｡⋆｡°✩｡⋆｡✮ ⋆ ˚｡⋆｡°✩✮ ⋆ ˚｡𓅨⋆｡°✩

[luvyeni]

60 SECONDS 𝕼. ( 방찬 )

𝓲𝓲 ㅤ𓈒ㅤ𓈒𓈒 ( ㅤ방찬혁 x fem!reader )   ─── ❛ genre ⸝⸝ smut. content warning. gore, mentions of blood, unprotected sex, oral (f), major character death word count. 1.5k 「 req? ⦂ yes/no 」 library  !

synopsis … one minute; he turned his head for one minute, 60 seconds — and he lost everything …

𝕼 ㅤ𓈒ㅤ𓈒 yeni’s note .ᐟ i talked about this fic a while ago and i just now decided to write cause im watching a zombie tv show ..

one minute; he turned his head for one minute, 60 seconds — and he lost everything. his only reason for surviving this hell he called a life.

when chan found you three years ago; the rotten corpses had already taken over, the streets no longer looked the same. the skies seemed to be a permanent grey, the smell of blood and rotten flesh engraved on everything, you couldn’t escape it. chan wasn’t alone, no he had his brothers that he took care of with no question; which was what he was doing when he found you — and you added a little bit of life to his dark depressing life.

he was looking for supplies in one of the rundown stores in town to take back to the house on the outskirts of town where it was mostly safe — not completely safe but they could rest their heads. he’d been searching for something that jeongin wanted, although they were in a tough situation he still tried to do things to lift their spirits… even if that meant looking for small things such as chocolate.

he heard the zombie before he heard your whimpering. pulling the knife out his pocket, ready to stab the corpse in the head — turning the corner to see you scrunched in a ball on the floor, the zombies foot was stuck under a shelf so he was confused why haven’t you moved. “please kill it.” you looked up at him. he watched you close your eyes, before punching the knife into the already dead things head. “get up.” he wiped the blood on his pants legs.

you stood up; backpack on. “thank you.” you said. “why don’t you have a weapon?” he asked. “they didn’t give me one.” you said. “you have a team? where are they?” you shrugged. “they left me.” you said; makes sense. “they left you alone without a weapon, when?” he said. “yesterday.”

“so you’ve survived by pure luck.” you nodded, smiling. which made him chuckle. “and chocolate that i stole out of that box over there.” you unzipped the bag taking a bar out. “here , for killing that thing over there.” you handed him the chocolate. “i’ll be on my way now.” you grimaced as you stepped over the thing. “gross.” he knew you wouldn’t make it another night without a weapon; he wasn’t sure if you’d even survive with one. “hold on.” he said , stopping you in your tracks. “yeah?” you asked, he felt a warmness spreading through his body the way you smiled at him. “come home with me, i can help you.”

over the past three year he’s fallen deeper in love with you; you’ve become such a beacon of light for everyone in the house; even when you’re all covered in blood from fighting off the zombies or down to the last rations of your food, you still find a way to make all of them smile, or laugh.

you were his only source of light in his life; and in five seconds it was all snatched away from him. you weren’t even supposed to be out with him , but felix who normally went with him on these runs, hurt his ankle with fighting off a zombie so you volunteered to replace him. chan tried to tell you no, just let him go alone, but as much as he loved you he could also admit you could be stubborn — god did he wish he forced you to stay in and let him go alone.

the moment he heard your screams of pain; he felt his whole world crashing down on top of him. “yn!” he ran through the aisle of the supermarket looking for you. “help me please!” he couldn’t have run any faster , knife in hand , plunging it deep inside its head — but it was too late. “ch-chan.” you stared at him with teary eyes. “no.” he said. “you’re fine , you’re gonna be fine.” but you both knew it was a lie; you saw the bite mark on your leg. “you’re gonna be fine.”

“chan you have to let me go.” he ran back to the house with you in his arms. “no , we have time to fix this , we can fix this.” he said through his own tears. “do-do what chan?” you said. “fucking something!” he shouted , almost kicking the door off the hinges. “whoa , what’s wrong!?.” the boys jumped ready for whatever. “help , please help.” he called out for minho who he always went to when he didn’t know what to do. “chan.” minho stared at his friend; someone who never showed emotions like this breakdown. “you know there’s nothing we can do.” you felt him squeezing you tighter. “chan.” you whispered; he pushed past everyone to take you back to the room you shared.

“what is he doing?” changbin said; everyone could feel the heaviness their friend had on his heart. “just give him time.” minho said. “he doesn’t have that much time, he knows what he has to do.”

“chan- please don’t say anything.” he whispered against your skin. “but i have to say something.” you said with a weak smile. “i want you to do it.” he closed his eyes, sucking in a breath. “i-i can’t.” he said. “i can’t do it.” he could feel the tears welding in his eyes. “please , we both know you don’t want the boys to do it.” you were right; you always were… he wished you were wrong this time. “come here.” you pulled him close. “i love you okay?” you ran your fingers through his curly hair. “say you love me back.”

“of course i love you.” he said. “i don’t think i’ve loved anyone else as much as i love you.” he pressed his lips against yours, his lips were salty from his tears. “ch-chan.” you felt his lips on your neck, your hand gripping his hair sighing. “we-we can’t.” he didn’t say anything, lifting your shirt above your hips. “please just let me do this.” he kissed right above your waist. “please.” he looked up with a pleading look. “ok-okay.” he pulled your pants down , being mindful of your leg. “baby.” he choked out , kissing in between your thighs. “chris.” you moaned out as he kissed your clothed cunt. “chan i need you.”

he wasted no time , pulling your panties off , diving right into your cunt. “chan fuck!” you moaned as he licked and sucked on your clit. he licked your cunt like he was a starving man, holding your legs open as his nose brushed on your sensitive bud. “chan , channie im not gonna last.” you moaned , grinding your hips against his mouth. “fuck , im gonna cum.” he felt your grip tightening on his hair as you came on his tongue. “oh my god.”

he pulled away; his lips glistening. “i need you chan.” you pulled at his waist. “please.” he unbuckled his pants, pulling his pants down enough to free his cock. “shh baby.” he kissed your forehead, whispering. “i got you.” you hissed feeling him entering you; his cock stretching you out. “chan!” you moaned as he fully bottomed out. “fu-fuck.” he cursed , moving his hips, slowly grinding into you. “fuck you feel so good.”

every good memory he shared with you ran through his mind as he began to pick up his speed. every small thing you did for him. “fu-fuck chan i love you so much.” you moaned out. “fuck me , chan.” you screamed his name. he didn’t want this to end; he didn’t want to lose you, he didn’t know how he was supposed to go on without you. “fuck im gonna cum.” you screamed , gripping the sheets “fuck im cumming!”

he stopped feeling you clench around him and that’s all he needed for him to cum. “shit.” he hissed , pressing his lips against yours , his hands engulfing yours , swallowing up your moans in a kiss , holding you close as if he was never gonna let you go… “please don’t let me turn.” you whispered in his ear. “it’s time.”

“no.” he was full on sobbing now; holding you closer to his skin. “i don’t want to.” he said. “you have to.” you said , you could feel your body growing colder and colder. “i dont have much time.” you said. “go get minho , let him do it then.” he couldn’t; he was already losing you , he couldn’t care putting his friend through that, as much as he wanted to. he couldn’t do it. “i love you.” he said. “i love you too.”

then you fell limp in his arms; and he let out a loud sob — because he knew what was coming and he promised you he wouldn’t do that. so he reached for the knife he kept next to him in bed; holding it to the back of your head , right in that spot he knew would end it immediately. he closed his eyes before pushing the knife into your head , a painful scream falling from his lips. he didn’t care if the zombies heard him or not , he lost all his will to live.

he lost it all in sixty seconds …

©️LUVYENI

[blue-aconite]

For Blurb Night: “You do have a stupid face.” with Jake ♥️

It's here! I swear I thought I could pull of a blurb night but turns out I couldn't.. Thanks to @a-reader-and-a-writer for looking this over ❤️

Blurb Night Masterlist

She smiled politely at another one of his anecdotes, hoping that he wouldn’t notice her disinterest. A quick glance at her watch told her it had been over two hours. 

Two hours of the man in front of her droning on about himself and all his supposed adventures. He had yet to tell a story where he wasn’t the hero. At this point, she was sure that more than 90% of what he said was fabricated to fit his own narrative. 

Hamish didn’t seem to take notice of the fact that she wasn’t listening, continuing to animatedly talk about a recent business trip where he made good on an important deal with another company. 

“.. and then, he asked if I wanted to join him for a night out on his yacht. He really should have been more specific because what he showed me was not a yacht, but a small boat. I never would have agreed to go along if I knew -“ 

She interrupted, seizing the chance before she could wither away from boredom. “You know what? It’s getting quite late. How about we call it a night? I do have an early morning tomorrow.” 

The lie fell easily but she couldn’t be bothered to care. She’d do anything at this point to make him stop talking. 

“Right, of course. You need your beauty sleep.” Hamish winked, standing up and offering his hand. She debated just standing up on her own but took it anyway, not wanting to seem rude. 

She really didn’t want to get back into the car with him, so she quickly caught Penny’s eye from behind the bar, begging her to interfere. 

Penny quickly caught on and hurried over to where they were standing. “Oh, are you leaving? Could I borrow you quickly before you go? It won’t take long, just … -“ 

“Sure, no problem.” She turned towards Hamish again. “Why don’t you head out? I don’t want to keep you waiting.” 

“Alright then. I’ll call you later.” Hamish kissed her cheek before heading towards the doors. 

Both she and Penny watched through the window as he got into his ridiculous car and drove out of the parking lot. 

“I thought he’d never leave.” Hangman appeared out of nowhere, pool cue in hand. 

Penny patted her on the shoulder before going back towards the bar, Jimmy waving cheerily at her. She waved back before turning around to face Hangman, raising one eyebrow. 

“And have you been keeping track of him all evening? I must say, I’m surprised. Didn't you know you were so interested in what I’m up to?” 

Hangman rolled his eyes, grabbing her elbow and steering her towards the pool table. “I haven’t seen you look that bored since the last briefing you guys were forced to join.” 

He made no attempt to deny that he had been watching her and her date, which brought a warm feeling in her stomach. 

There was a time where the two of them could have been something, but neither had been ready for it. Now, she wondered if they should have taken the leap anyway. 

“Well, to be fair, it was almost three hours and even Cyclone looked bored, and he was the one holding it.” She countered, accepting the pool cue he handed her.  “You sure you’re ready to lose?” 

Hangman snorted, leaning over to make the break. “I never lose, sweetheart.” 

“Guess there’s a first for everything then. It’s going to be entertaining watching the smirk fall off your face.” 

He shook his head. “I’ll enjoy watching you try. And if I can entertain you, what’s the harm? Better that than what that stupid-what’s-his name could ever come up with.” 

He was joking but she could read him easily enough at this point. “Are you jealous?” 

“I don’t get jealous. Especially not over someone named Hamish. Stupid name, stupid face.” 

She took her shot, sinking a solid before answering. “You know, I don’t mind if you are. It’s cute. And even though he’s the most boring person ever, his face was nice to look at.” 

She tried to get around the table for her next shot but Hangman crowded her against it, trapping her between his body and the table. “Mine’s much prettier to look at.” 

His breath was warm on her face, his lips inches from her ear as he bent his neck slightly to look down at her. 

She tried her best to come up with a witty comeback but him being so close distracted her. 

“Nothing to say?” Jake smirked, leaning even closer. 

She took a breath, willing herself to get it together. “You also have a stupid face so I’d argue that you’re pretty much the same.” 

Jake straightened up but his eyes never left hers. “I take offence to that. And I’m nothing like Hamish. I’ll prove you wrong.” 

“And how are you going to do that?” They were headed into dangerous territory but the butterflies told her it would be worth it, as did Jake’s smile. 

“Guess you’re just going to have to stick around and see.”

[slaaverin]

I was thinking with all the discourse on x about Jimins letter, and the cult and solos trying to scramble to debunk his own words, how they are this or that, just bros, they don’t sleep togetherness, don’t see each other before bed yadda yadda.

If it’s common practice in the military to be in group dorms, to shower together, why scramble to say that Jikook don’t do that, they don’t see each other?

Why the scramble to say they aren’t close?

What is it that people are so afraid of?

Because you’re not telling me if it was Yoongi and Jimin who enlisted, or Jimin and Tae, or Jin and Namjoon, or Hobi and Yoongi, etc etc, that people wouldn’t be celebrating it

So why not Jikook? What is it that has them so unhinged that they are literally resorting to calling them both liars, that Jimins letter was written by PR at Hybe, that cooks sleep elsewhere and have different bed times, when Jimin himself said ‘before bed’.

What is it that makes people shout ‘they are brothers!!!!!!’ Over and over and over again.

Because where is the line?

What would tip them over the more than friends category in SK skinship terms, or even say if they were a man and women?

Would it be the hugs? The constant need to touch, to be together? The cheek to cheek selcas? The spending special days together? The tones they use with each other? The teasing, bickering and flirting? The coy looks and smiles? The way they know what the other is thinking? The way they have their inside jokes? The way they are so domestic in the kitchen, JK cooks and JM being Sous Chef. The comfort and companionship they have sought out with the buddy system. The love they exude?

am I missing anything?

I mean I probably am, that’s the quick notes version of their bond. My point being that all of that alone is striking, means their relationship is specific to them and them alone, it stands out, it’s beautiful. It should be celebrated and cooed over, the very least it should be respected.

Is it then that this is what they fear? That they do in fact see all of that, see Jimin writing that he and JK are having (read: deep) conversations about life before bed, and think oh hell no, gotta make up a lie to stop that being true! As if that is how it works.

I don’t know what the futures holds, what the comeback will be like, I just actually hope everything will work out the way each of them want it to. That they are allowed to mature, that they can hold space for each other to grow, to be themselves more than ever. That boundaries are put in place and respected between the members themselves, and the fans. That this will be a new era, as they said in Festa and since; that they won’t hold back things they have wanted to say but couldn’t. It’s a reoccurring theme, JK has said it in lives, Jimin in his last live, now this letter.

I just want them to be loved, and to allow themselves to be love in return. They deserve it.

Anon, I truly feel the same way.

I think solos, antis and tkkers trying to disprove jikook's bond is for many reason. But the simple main one is that they don't want it to be true.

It all comes from desire, they want a different story, because they have this fantasy, because homophobia, and other reasons. They want something else, something that will never be true because it is just that, a story they told themselves because it makes them feel safer and more in control. It's their ego telling them "it should be another way instead!" "This isn't right" (homophobia again), and you know how powerful the ego can be. When someone wants something so bad, some people might go to extremes to get it, no matter the cost.

They believe their little scenario (that they don't like each other, that they are not close) for different reasons and each person think they are totally right about that. Each person thinks their perspective is the best one.

You know that wars have been fought over different perspectives?

Belief is a very powerful thing. Most people cling into some beliefs because it makes them feel more safe, their ego overcompensating over some internal lack.

At least with the scenario they can control the narrative. It is known and comfortable. Because the alternative is unknown, it's wild, it's unpredictable, it's scary. They might lose control, you see? it all comes from fear. Fear of something being different. And jikook ARE different. Their relationship stands out a lot within the group.

And you know what I don't think they actually see the same things as we do when they watch jikook.

Because they made up their mind already, they made up their own story, their ego doesn't care what's actually real! They watch the content through their already skewed lense, and they are so sure they are right. So every single detail will be used to reinforce their belief. To say, "See, I am right! He said this, so they are not close! They can't be"

Ohhh, to what extent the ego would go to be right. You know I don't think they are even aware they are twisting things and making up lies (well of course some of them do) but I think the majority genuinely believe what they see is true. It's true because they absolutely want it to be true. They don't want jikook to be close, to have this special bond, because it doesn't align with their personal selfish desires. "I want JK with Tae!" "I want jikook dating girls and not boys!" "I want my fave to be this way instead!"

I think jikook truly unsettle them to their core. It triggers something inside that they don't want to look at, because it's uncomfortable, so they reject it entirely. They choose something else to believe in, because that makes them feel better. It's less dangerous.

That's why many tkkers are also homophobic, weirdly. They have this ship idea in their heads, but since their ship never happens on camera, they believe it exist somewhat outside of camera, outside of reality. It's a pocket where they can project any types of ideas within the relationship, they can explore their inner fantaisies, let their imagination run wild, and create what they want instead of what is. It escapism, it's dreaming, and it helps them cope with reality that is different.

Because the reality is that jikook have this incredible bond, here, tangible, real, with a incredible depth, and it makes them scared shit. Because that's not something they can control, because it is different, and actually gay. Like for real. Not in a hypothetical "what ifs" scandalous and a little taboo way. No, it's real. But it's so outside of their scope of what's "socially acceptable" that they simply will never accept it. "Because it's BAD" mind you. It's bad and wrong and shouldn't exist. Because they think righteousness is something else entirely. Because they believe their sense of right from wrong is correct.

Of course it's not.

Trying to reason with them is absolutely pointless. It will always be a battle of ego, or different perspectives clashing. These people will not change, it would be too scary to them.

I'm afraid jikook will absolutely never be loved by them the way they deserve. And the hate and the lies and the toxicity is always going to be here. Because you know how much time it takes to actually grow in awareness? To change beliefs? To evolve towards more love? Guys it could take several lifetimes no joke.

I get your sentiment anon, I do.

I think jikookers in general spend too much time fighting with all of them, because it frustrates us so much that jikook are not loved.

But forget it guys, our frustration will only grow if we focus on them too much. They are where they are at, these people. They can't see anything else. I'm not even sure they are able to. Ego and beliefs are so strong, it's very hard for someone to go against it.

They will never see it our way.

Oh, in an ideal world, everyone would love jikook and celebrate them.

But we are in a world where we're thrown with people on different levels of consciousness, and it's just something we have to deal with. It's not comfortable. It can be horrible. But that's just the way it is.

It all comes from fear in the end. Fear of something being different than you, fear of losing control, fear of the unknown.

These guys, beneath layers of piled up beliefs and lies and stories within their psyche, are just scared, that's all. And they might not be aware that they are.

Fear keeps them from seeing things from their heart unfortunately.

And overcoming fear is one of the hardest thing to do in this world.

So, don't be too frustrated with them. It sucks, yes. Of course I wish it would be different. Of course I would want them to *see the light* at some point, but it's not very realistic or easy. None of this situation is easy. People are very complex.

These people will remain here, battling for their ego, burning twitter with their hate, twisting things, making up lies. There's nothing we can do about it, they are here to stay. The only thing we can control is how we react to them. Because I see so many times jkkers also using animal names and insults, battling them with their own ego and hate, and that's just not it. It is so futile. It will never change anything. And we can be better than this. I'm not saying I have a magical solution, I don't. I think it's up to each individual to discern what's right for them in their heart.

In an ideal world, we would all come together in harmony, and praise and celebrate jikook's bond for what is it, something wonderful, magical, beautiful, and see it with our heart and soul, and bask in love and share it between ourselves, and just revel in the magnificence. All of us. How great that would be. It would be a little bit like heaven, right?

Well we're not in heaven anymore, and if we wanted that we would have stayed there and not come here on this earth. Here things will inevitably be flawed, because humans are not and never will be perfect.

But the best we can do is stay within groups of like-minded people, people sharing the same love for love, and create our own little paradise here to enjoy jikook's bond and celebrate it.

It will not be the world's, but it will be ours. Which is already something, I guess?

I went on a long tengent I'm sorry

I can't wait to see what the members will say after military. It's going to be very interesting. Haters are gonna lose their minds (which is funny at this point XD)

Let's each of us love and support jikook, for the people who can't. Let's share their love so it might touch somebody else's heart.

And do our best to be good humans, right?

No matter what happens.

Love you my fellow jikookers 💜

[imbaebi]

Night breeze

ִֶָ࣪☾. 양 정인 —

paring: Bf!Jeongin x fem!reader

tags: cute fluffy boyfriend stuff 🤍

warnings: none?

wc / cc : 0.5k / 3.1k

synopsis —---

You decide on not bringing a jacket, afraid it'll ruin your outfit even though your bf tells you too. You might start to regret that decision...

—-- ⪩⪨⪩⪨

    The cold breeze soft yet persist on this Saturday night walk. You and your boyfriend on your way home from having dinner with your friends. You and Jeongin talking about the said dinner. It was colder than you had expected, but you didn't want to say that you regret not bringing a jacket after he had told you to bring one. You shivered a bit, your stomach exposed due to the crop top you chose to wear. You hoped he hadn't noticed that because you weren't going to give him the satisfaction that he was right. You continued your conversation as if nothing was wrong. Another cold breeze blew your way, longer than the first few ones. You shivered and reflexively hugged yourself, seeking warmth.

    Jeongin raised a brow, a knowing side glance. You stopped hugging yourself and shoved your hands into your pocket.

    “You're cold, aren't you.” It sounded more like a statement than a question.

    “No.” you denied, cheeks flushed. Definitely from the cold and not embarrassment after getting caught.

     He stepped in front of you, stopping your steps. He looked down at you, leaning close to your face. You stop breathing for a second.

    “Are you sure?” His eyes sparkled with teasing.

    “Yes, I'm um sure.” You deny straight through your teeth. You didn't want to admit it. Unfortunately for you though, another breeze passed by making you shiver involuntarily.

    His brow raised again, seeing through your lie. You pouted.

    “Okay fine, it's a little chillier than I expected tonight.” half admitting that you were cold.

    He chuckled.

    “This is why I told you to wear a jacket, Y/N.”

    “But it would have ruined my outfit,” You whined. Jeongin shook his head.

    “But now you're cold.” He stated teasingly.

    “Hey, beauty is pain, Mister.” You answered sassily.

    He chuckled and began to shrug off his jacket.

    “What are you doing?”

    “You think I'm gonna let my girlfriend stay cold until we get home?” He asked as he placed the jacket on your shoulders.

    “But what about you?” You felt instantly warm with the jacket on your shoulders.

    “I'll be fine, it's not that far of a walk. Besides, your beautiful presence warms me up.” He teased, his face close to yours.

    You blushed and push him.

    “Shut up.” you say as you began to walk away.

    He caught up and wrapped his arm around your waist.

    “It's true though.” He placed a kiss on the side of your head. “My beautiful girlfriend who warms me up hotter than the sun.”

    “You're such a sap.”

    “Only for you, Jagiya.”

    You two walk home in mostly silence after that. You hug yourself deeper into the jacket, feeling warmer now that you have a shield against the cool breeze.

    “Will you listen to me and bring a jacket from now on?”

    “Nope. Why would I do that when I can have yours?” You tease.

    “You're gonna start stealing my jackets now like how you do my hoodies and t-shirts?” He asked amused.

    “Might have to. You have to wear them first though, cause I'd like them warm.”

    Jeongin shook his head at you,

    “Whatever you say, cutie.”

[xfgpng]

timeless…

— [ nsfw ] :: just fluffy sex (kinda?)

— wc :: 979

2 years, 4 months and 16 days. he tries not to think about her anymore but he sees her face in everyone he talks to and his dating life has pretty much gone to shit.

he misses her more than he’d like to admit and it hurts. whoever said it gets better with time told a bold face fucking lie and he hopes they have a bad day.

he still hears her laughter when he’s alone, feels her skin against his in all of his dreams and nightmares that sleeping is a luxury these days.

yuuji knows it’s his fault. he left when he could’ve stayed for her but he didn’t. he was young, he still is but especially then. the end of high school, moving out the city.. he wasn’t even sure about volleyball anymore and everything was too overwhelming and he wouldn’t blame her if she never wanted to speak to him ever again, he deserved it for breaking both their hearts.

it’s why his breath catches in his throat when he walks into the newest volleyball gym and sees her. she’s as beautiful as always and he knows how much she wanted to get into sports management. she’d always loved the sport and it’s one of the reasons he fell in love with her in the first place.

apart of him wanted to start up again because he missed it, it was a huge part of his life for so long but another part of him, a more sadistic or masochistic part of him, he doesn’t know anymore, was doing this to feel closer to her again and here she was, 2 years, 4 months and 20 days later looking just as beautiful as she’s always been and his chest hurts.

he doesn’t believe in coincidences, never has with the way life played out for the last 2 years and something months.

she’s talking to the coach of his team, writing notes and pointing to something on a board nearby. he can’t focus on anything other than her and he can smell her perfume without trying to and it’s making his knees weak and he might just cry.

what wakes him up is a ball to his face and he finds himself laying on his back but it doesn’t hurt, he definitely feels lightheaded but he can see the ceiling and lights and then … her

she’s saying something to him, he feels her cool hand on his head, a warm cloth against his nose and she looks exasperated but he knows her well, despite their time apart, she’s not mad at him. she’s shooting a nasty glare towards the guy from the other team who was obviously trying to be funny on purpose.

he here’s here when she calls him

“asshole” y/n huffs, “you seriously need to be more careful, are you childish?”

the guy mumbles an apology but he’s smirking and he knows she’ll launch herself at him but she’s grown up because she just rolls her eyes and looks down at him.

“-you okay?” she asks and he thinks he nods, thinks he says yes but he’s not sure. he’s too focused on her hand still holding his head and she smells as good as he remembered.

“i am now” he mumbles, grinning and she rolls her eyes but it’s a lot more fond than just a few moments ago and she’s smiling at him. his heart is beating wildly against his rib cage and he feels so happy even if his head is starting to hurt. she’s smiling at him.

her skin is softer than silk if that’s even possible. he’s love struck, has been since he met her and she cussed him out in the hallway at school.

she clings to him like she’s the one that’s scared he’ll disappear and it’s everything.

“yuuji” she gasps into their kiss and gods it feels so good, better than he remembered.

“i’ve got you baby” he whispers back, his grip on her hips don’t let up and he knows it hurts but she likes it, she begs for more and he’s a weak, weak man. he gives her more.


he’d do anything for her if she asked.

“feels so good” she moans, her back arching and her chest presses against his naked skin. everything is so hot and sticky and they’re going to have to clean up the bed before they’re able to sleep but he’s so happy, he wants to cry.

“i know” he groans right against her ear, “love being inside you… i missed you so much baby”

she’s nodding, cupping his face and kissing him back just as fiercely and he knows she missed him too. he can feel it in the way she kisses him, the way she scratches up his back, the way she grips him like she doesn’t want him to pull out and he has no intention of doing so anyway.

“you want more baby?” he teases. yuuji can’t resist, he can’t help it. this feels like a dream only it’s better because it’s finally real. he’s never letting her go again.

“please yuuji” she begs, “please fuck me”

“i am fucking you” he grins but he snaps his hips forward and the headboard cracks. neither of them care enough to stop, he can guy ten more headboards but he’s not stopping now, he can’t.

and he thinks he’s died and goes to heaven when she pushes him onto his back and rides him so hard his toes curl. he’s never experienced this with anyone else and he never wants to.

“so good” he moans, he can’t help himself. “please, don’t stop”

his holding onto her as she moves on top of him and he thinks that maybe 2 years, 4 months and something days are worth it if he gets to keep her forever.

[gimmebackmyskeeball]

toxic rafe w his ‘ihatemybf’ pogue gf

Looking at you two, your couple made sense. You looked good together with Rafe, you complimented each other…but, behind closed doors, it was the worst relationship you’ve ever been in. And the bad part was, you were fucking addicted to Rafe.

Wanna guess the even worse part? He was addicted to you. And we all know Rafe doesn’t do well with addictions.

Your relationship sucked and that was sugarcoating it. Rafe sometimes came to points where he forgot you were his girlfriend…and it wasn’t because of the coke. He just randomly forgot who you were and that you existed on a random Thursday, only remembering he had a girlfriend when he saw you or when you called.

And if someone sat you down to take a lie detector test, you’d fail the moment they ask you about love.

It was possessiveness, not love. The only reason you two had PDA was to show off. But possessiveness ran deep in both of your bloods.

Rafe was driving you the two of you to Tanneyhill —he decided you should spend the night over because your mom’s friends wanted to spend the night over and he didn’t wanted other people to see you while you slept, fucked up mindset, classic Rafe— you were buckled up, arms crossed over your chest, looking out the window, ignoring his phone that buzzed.

For the sixth time in the last ten minutes.

With a huff, you tried to keep your composure…before it buzzed again.

“Look- who keeps texting you?” you finally spoke up, brows furrowed, finally looking at Rafe for the first time since you got in his Range.

Dating a kook wasn’t exactly your preference either. Sure, it was nice, he treated you with a lot of stuff —to once again, show off to people— but it was still nice. Though, getting cheated on by one? Fucking crazy. And you weren’t having it.

Rafe stayed silent for a moment, his eyes focused on the road. He knew exactly who was texting him, and he knew exactly why it was buzzing. He had a missed call and 20 texts…and he knew where it was going.*

“It’s nobody.” he lied through his teeth, voice cold and blunt. A lie. A big fat lie, that he knew wouldn’t be believed.

“Nobody?” you raised a brow, repeating his lame ass excuse.*

“Nobody.”

He echoed, repeating his excuse. Rafe had his jaw clenched, knowing damn well you knew who was texting him. It was just an endless game of cat and mouse at that point…you knew who it was and he couldn’t lie about it any longer.

*Another buzz went off. He kept his eyes focused on the road. He didn’t think you were that dumb to believe the bullshit he was spewing.*

“How is ‘nobody’ making your phone buzz, dipfuck?”

You retorted, brows furrowed, tongue poking the inside of your cheek. Rafe was getting on your last nerve and there was only a certain amount of bullshit you could take before you took it all out on him.

He clenched his jaw even more, a low, frustrated grumble leaving his lips. Rafe hated being challenged, and for some reason he was getting more and more annoyed by the minute. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down…but it was useless. The phone kept buzzing, and with every buzz he grew angrier and angrier.

“Stop getting your panties in a bunch, it’s nothing.”

He knew he didn’t sound convincing at all, but he was trying his best.

“Yeah, it’s the only bunch my panties are getting in…at the moment.” you shot him a look, still fuming at the audacity of his lies.

He stayed silent, not saying anything to your comment. Deep down, he knew you would say something like that…and it annoyed him to the core.

Another buzz. Another. And another. The damn buzzing wouldn’t stop, and you knew exactly who was calling and texting.

There was a long moment of complete silence, his knuckles turning white as he held the steering wheel tightly, the veins popping in his arms from the pressure.

“Acknowledge me, Rafe.” you spoke, not liking the stupid silent treatment thing while he dramatized the entire thing.

He let out a deep, annoyed sigh. Rafe hated being told what to do. Who the hell was he? A damn toddler? But he needed to acknowledge you. He didn’t exactly want to start another fight.

“What?” He snapped, finally speaking up. His voice was cold, sharp and snappy…he clearly wasn’t liking this entire conversation.

“Acknowledge me and the damn buzzes before I toss the thing out the window.”

He gripped the steering wheel, letting out a sigh. His phone kept buzzing, the loud, obnoxious buzz filling the car, making him grow more and more frustrated. His voice was getting sharper, harsher every second that went on.

“It’s my damn ex.” He eventually managed to bite out through clenched jaws, body tense, still focusing on the road. His knuckles were still turning white from the death grip he had on the damn wheel.

“Why the fuck isn’t your ex blocked?” you spoke, brows furrowing, face scrunched up. The idea was crazy to you.

“I don’t know!”

He snapped, jaw clenched. This entire goddamn conversation was making him more and more frustrated. Rafe was seconds away from snapping. He knew it was stupid to not block his goddamn ex but he didn’t think you would be this pissed about it. He didn’t take you as the type who’d get all possessive over his phone, but apparently he had been wrong.

“That’s so pathetic…” you mumbled, turning to look back at down at your own phone with a scoff.

His jaw went slack at your words. He knew the whole thing was pathetic. He was being pathetic. But he didn’t care, not anymore.

His phone buzzed. Another goddamn text and missed call. He glanced at you for a second, before turning his eyes back to the road with a sigh.

Sure, you two sucked…and sometimes literally. But Rafe knew damn well after all the name-calling, all the fights, both of you lacked the self respect to walk away from each other.

kinda reflected now putting down my phone, taking a breath, shooting the invisible camera a glare, running a lap in my room and hitting the dougie brb

[itsonlyfanservice]

I will probably combine the answers to the complaints and questions of the pjms in this one long post. I probably didn't answer something, but it's okay. I'm just combining the general complaints. Whoever likes to read long scrolls - welcome.

I apologize in advance if the text contains logical errors or incorrect words - I don't speak english :3

So, the first thing I will simply say on behalf of myself, as a jkkr (I can't take responsibility for all of us) - I am extremely saddened that a certain part of you, pjms, deny any warm relations between jkk. You support Jimin so much in everything, you will stand up for him like a mountain. But no. As for his relationship with the person he loves (here you can insert any meaning: as a brother, as a bandmate, as a lover, as a colleague, as a close person - any will do) - here your support breaks down. Yes, I'm still mad at you because of ays, how you unite in groups to vote against this show)) That's how furious you are with the unit of jkk that you are ready to start harming your own supposed bias, which makes you exactly the same haters as tkkrs, which we will talk about later.

And now, to the reading of complaints and questions.

Jimin gets hate because of jikookers.

Let me clarify, did jkkrs do something that made everyone furious and hate Jimin? It's not Jimin and Jungkook who go on vacation together, it's not Jungkook and Jimin who are close to each other's families (the same Jimin plays with Jungkook's brother, and Jimin's father singles out only the two of them for some reason), it's not the jkk who constantly communicate together in this special manner, it's not the jkk who comfort each other in a manner that's very different from all the other members, it's not Jungkook who makes Jimin thirst traps or is ready to run to him right in the middle of the night, and it's not Jimin who puts Jungkook's eyes in his music video (come on, tell me that this is another coincidence and the eyes are actually anyone's, not Jungkook's). It's not all this that makes the tkkrs burn with jealousy and hate Jimin, inventing hundreds of legends about his disgustingness, but the jkkrs who are touched by this and support jkk. Am I understanding your idea correctly? Well, ok. I'll take all the blame then 🤡

We (pjms) have been fighting against tkkrs for so many years, and you only fuel their hatred.

Here I will ask a counter question, why weren't you seen earlier, in the past years, when jkkrs fought tkkrs? Why did we often get excuses from you and from ot7 "these are wars between stupid shippers"? The most you did was run and write how wonderful Jimin is, and tkk are worthless compared to him, even together. Well, now we have what we have. And don't pretend that you are special knights who single-handedly defend Jimin and everyone should thank you for it. The reasons for the hatred itself have already been written above. It is not because of jkkrs. We've been fighting with tkkrs for a hundred years, but for some reason you don't seem to notice it, although every second jkkr fighting with tkkrs 🤨

We only get content about jkk from the company and never anything personal. It's fanservice, and you're stupid and support it.

Yeah, yeah, and dozens of leaks from sasaeng are also not true. And that jkk literally hang out in each other's families is also a lie. And their company forced them to join the army, it's not their personal desire. And Jimin's father is just an idiot flirting with jkkrs, yes. By the way, about the father…

Jimin's father is unprincipled and greedy, and makes money on shippers, it's just a business. This has nothing to do with reality. If Jimin were shipped with someone else, he would have made a cafe for a different pairing. And so he just makes money on Jimin's name in the same way.

Seriously, the father made a cafe for the pairing and is making money off of Jimin's name? 🤨 I heard this somewhere, from taekookers, if my memory serves me right)) But even if you discount everything, Jimin is still shipped with a lot of people. So what, and where? Dad, make a minimoni cafe 😂 In general, all this rhetoric is pure brainwashing of tkkrs. It's not the father expressing support for jkk, but the father stupidly making money off of his son's name and shipping. Which again brings me back to the thought - pjms and tkkrs, it seems you are very much in favor of the same thing. How come you didn't start shipping tkk so that in your head Jungkook would stay away from Jimin 🤔

Jimin and Jungkook get different support from the hybe, Jungkook is idolized, and Jimin is pushed aside, and you deny it and only pjms scream about the blatant injustice towards Jimin.

Do you know what's funny about this statement? Yes, that's right, you're talking like tkkrs again 🌚 tkkrs who say that Jimin earned his place with his ass from the producers (you get it), everything was bought for Jimin by his father and bpd, that Jimin is pushed everywhere, and Taehyung is pushed aside for the sake of Jimin's promotion, Jimin was given this, they did that, and Taehyung's songs were stolen and given to him (sorry, I still have psychological trauma from these theories😂). The roles have changed, but the narrative remains) The company has only one interest - financial. They spend years calculating how to work with the artist in order to earn more. Do you seriously think that a company like that sits and thinks, hmmmm, we have a superstar and another superstar, but we will pull one out by the ears with all our might, and for some reason we will forget about the other one, so what, we will miss out on millions of dollars? No, that's not how it works, they will work for every cent)))0))0 The most they can do to harm an artist is to create a fake scandal, and even then it will be retribution for some disobedience. This does not look like Jimin's story. You are immersed in the world of hopeless delulu, trying to connect the dots on the map and make Jimin out to be a sufferer offended by everyone, and then walk around and feel sorry for him because of your own fantasies. You don't have contracts in hand, you have no idea what is going on behind the scenes, you have no idea what kind of relationship the guys have with the management. You literally have nothing except "well, we would like more, Jimin deserves it." I could sit next to you and also complain about why there was no tour, why we didn't get promo for half a year, but in reality there is no reason for this. Jimin was not dragged into a scandal, Jimin was not banned from solo work, Jimin was not set up - literally nothing was done that really indicates machinations against him. All the work was obviously carried out in accordance with what was discussed at meetings with Jimin and according to the plan that was built.

The company is trying to make it look like Jimin wanted to film a jikook show on his own, for which Jimin is hated again (what does jkkrs have to do with this? 🤔)

This is very interesting. Jkk once wanted to film a show, apparently they thought about it more than once and decided to jump on the last train, before the army. Jimin did not say anything about the fact that he was the only one who wanted this. They both said that these were joint thoughts. But what do we get in the end? Pjms hate this show because it was kind of forced on Jimin and Jimin was hated by tkkrs because of the show, tkkrs hate the show simply because it features jkk in all its glory and again that nasty Jimin next to Jungkook (I laugh that they don't make any claims against Jungkook, who snapped at Taehyung quite strongly in the second part "well, why the hell did you come here, this show is for the two of us" 🤣). As a result, the brainchild of jkk, in which Jimin himself takes direct voluntary and happy part, pleases only jkkrs and that part of the fandom whose brain has not atrophied. Everyone else is against it because of their fantasies. Mmmm cool.

Jimin's femininity, queer coding, bigender/bisexuality, references to LGBT people and culture, etc. - all this was invented only by jkkrs, in reality it never happened, he didn't tell you all directly "I'm gay", so shut up. No one sees it except you.

Well… no, so no. We made it all up ourselves. And none of this, for example, ever existed))

And if it does exist, it was all invented by stylists. It's all queerbaiting in K-pop. It's all just like that. These are all random coincidences, every time. But in fact, he is a brutal heterosexual, worse than Dwayne Johnson, as he says himself. Especially when he corrects the host who admires his masculinity "I'm not masculine". Plus the question, when did Jimin say that he was heterosexual? Queers see queer coding, you don't. That's all.

Jkkrs regard all of Jimin's actions as confirmation of his fictitious relationship with Jungkook.

Hmm no 🤔 But for example, we have Jungkook's eyes on the falling scoreboard (you can try as much as you want to prove that these are not his eyes, but until you have real evidence that someone else was photographed or, as some wrote, that these are AI-generated eyes - we don't care about your delulu). Or the song "Letter", packaged in a very special way and again, by some miracle, it is Jungkook. AYS with Jungkook (+ Tae in episods). And he went to the army again with this fucking Jungkook together… But in general, you right, his life does not revolve only around Jungkook. And it should not.

If it were not profitable for the company to sell jkk, then they would never have been together at all, but this way they at least see each other on set once a year (again, what do jkkrs have to do with this?).

Considering that the most popular and aggressive pairing is taekook, and the most hated is jikook, the company is full of idiots and they think, damn, we have a super-hyped ship and a ship that is a bone in the throat of many. What to choose… Which one will pay off… I'm betting everything on red. Oh, I mean on jkk 🤡 It's funny to hear about "once a year", when they literally say themselves that they drink together, Jungkook is all languishing on broadcasts, when I can already come to you, Jimin, I can right now, right in the same blanket 😂 They solve issues with the army together, Jungkook's brother exposes Jimin in front of him (well, if you don't try to play the fool again, pretending that there is definitely someone else in the photo), they leak us photos from surveillance, photos from stalkers and God knows what else. For some reason they even wanted to serve in the army together. But that's what personal life is personal for, because you don't have to report on every step. What we see is already more than enough. As much as you and tkkrs don't want it, the jkk are obviously extremely close people to each other.

Only pjms support Jimin, the rest have given up on him, including the jkkrs. The jkkrs just jerk off to their fantasies and they are of no help to Jimin. They will vote for anyone but Jimin. They will prefer to vote for Jungkook.

Very funny) And again we see how your self-esteem soars to the skies. Only thanks to you Jimin achieves success, no one in the whole world needs him, everything is only you and everything is only for you, all you do is vote, stream, buy merch, etc. So what does this mean, you support the opinion of the tkkrs and akgaes maknae that Jimin received all the awards undeservedly, simply thanks to the cheating pajamas, and no one needs him? Oh, oh 🤡 Think again before you write such nonsense. It's not only pjms who support Jimin. And jkkrs most often have Jimin in their main biases, by the way, and they will vote for him rather than for Jungkook 🤔 Jkkkrs, I'm waiting for your excuses, why don't you also actively support Jungkook, huh? 🌚

[xeversayfishxace]

"Sorry, I'm not trying to make you uncomfortuble. I just..."

Why was he asking so much? Normally Xever was very much self absorbed doing his own thing not paying attention living in his little bubble with no one getting in his way. He did lie and manipulate others for his own amusement and profit if he needed to. The only one who felt different was that dog. The one who took so much.

(Dammit why am I thinking of him of all times? I hated that guy!)

But, Raz had been the closest thing to a friend Xever had. They spent so long by one another's side yet Xever never did anything other than push away. Also didn't help the guy was a complete jerk who deserved a lot of the crap he was given. He did a lot to make things worse for them both. Yet, once again Xever feels he should have tried a bit harder. Should have done something...anything...

(You left him to die, you let him die. And once he was dead were you satisfied that the one who caused so much pain to you was dead?)

No, he wasn't. Xever realised he felt nothing regarding Raz's death. He had felt nothing this whole time never anything meaningful towards anyone but a small few. And it took losing Raz to realise how much of his life was truly hollow. How often Xever drowned himself in his thrills to hide how he had nothing that he was nothing but a shell.

The bravado, the ego, the dismissiveness, the pushing of boundries, the desire to cause suffering, who was Xever Montes under all of that? Xever looked within and saw that he was simply covering up a hole. A hole that had been there this whole time which he ignored.

"I...realised too late that I never had anything meaningful in my life. I have no ties, no bonds, I was just an aimless wanderer going through life in a haze while struggling to survive. The first time I ever felt something, well it was respect only that respect caused me pain when I saw the man I followed wasn't what I thought he was. The other person I felt something for. I hated with all my heart and soul...but...at least he made me feel something you know? And I could have made things better maybe if I tried. But, I didn't."

He did understand where fly came from in some respects but in others he didn't because Xever never had a family. Or even a concept of family, he only ever had himself maybe one person he connected to who ended up betraying him or Xever remained closed off.

"Forget it, I'm just regretting a few things. I can't get them back, so I just will go on as I always have. Alone to my own devices."

     SUPERFLY CAN’T HELP but grunt derisively at Xever speaking of others hiding their intentions. He held no derision for the fish himself, of course, just…he can’t understand it.  “ But how could they stand there after everything humans put us through and still side with them ?  It makes no sense. If you ask me, they just couldn’t handle doin’ the HARD stuff. Never could. Always had t’ leave it to their ever so capable older brother. “  He can’t keep the bitterness and resentment from dripping in every word. Speaking in terms of literal years, he’d never been much older than they were. He was a baby raising babies at one point. Yet he still pulled up his bootstraps and got crap done, because someone had to. He’d just hoped that someday they’d GROW UP and return the favour for friggin’ ONCE. Maybe it’s on him for assuming too much of them.

     His agitation quiets a little at the addition that one couldn’t be really HONEST on the streets.  “ Yeah, I learned that the hard way, “  he mumbles.  “ First time I dipped my toes in crime stuff, I didn’t know what I was doin’. Had a guy willin’ to show me some ropes, though. Made the mistake of thinkin’ us gettin’ CHUMMY somehow made us friends. Then when things got rough and I wanted out, first thing he did was threaten everything I cared about, ‘cause I’d been stupid enough to tell him things I shouldn’t have. “  Given that they’re stopped, the fly takes a moment to loosen his grip and lean back, exhaling a sigh through spiracles.  “ He wound up bein’ the first man I’d ever taken out. If ya’ catch my drift, “  he adds with a nod towards Xever. And he’d do it again if he had to. Screw that guy.

     Although he remains quiet throughout the fish’s speech out of politeness, he can feel the agitation creeping in at the suggestion that he scared his family. That he displayed some kind of insecurity. But really, those things aren’t really a surprise to him. He knows he scared them. He knows he wasn’t always as confident as he made himself out to be. He just never wanted to admit that.  The only reason he doesn’t give one of his usual knee-jerk reactions is likely because he can tell that Xever’s not judging him for that. Not by the way the fish relays his own story. Even if some of the things he says in relation to said anecdote make Superfly want to shift awkwardly in his seat from how uncomfortably close it hit home.

     “ …You’re askin’ a lot of questions, “  is all the fly says at first. But it’s just deflection, avoidance, because whatever the TRUE answer to any of these questions are, Superfly’s simply not ready to admit to them yet. Because that would mean admitting HE was the problem, and he’s not willing to do that.  “ I just did what I had to t’ take care of ‘em, man. Sometimes takin’ care o’ people means gettin’ ugly and doin’ things they don’t like for their greater good. Sometimes you just gotta be the BAD GUY t’ get things done. Means you get blamed for a lotta their problems too. “  ( He still remembers Bebop and Rock’s exchange, claiming HE was the reason they were angry all the time. What a joke. )  “ Way I see it, they found some OTHER folks who put shiny ideas in their naive heads, and decided on a whim that I was the cause of all their problems. I’ll give it a WEEK ‘fore they realize I was RIGHT. “

     He’s more than glad to get off the bike by this point, too worked up to stay on for another second.  “ Cool. I’ll follow your lead. “

[bison-appreciation-club]

i was looking through a list of 'forgotten historical speeches that deserve to be remembered <3' and like. it had elizabeth i's tilbury speech on the list? there is no way that isn't a famous speech already

[lunarharp]

"Found out" set in kind of a made-up chapter where the girls are in trouble, or something.

[beeholyshit]

Part 2: I hope you are sorry