#whoop his ass hel

[ellewod]

careful aemond……….. careful

[sugugasm]

𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐌𝐄 ? - FT. GOJO SATORU, TOJI FUSHIGURO, NANAMI KENTO

✩༄ the jjk men fuck their exes.

— content warning - minors dni! f! reader but feel free to imagine any description you’d like, praise, degrading, cunninlingus, fingering, cowgirl, breeding, slight toxicity??

— notes - first headcon, whoop whoop. i literally need them so bad. enjoy this jjk men brainrot that i’ve cooked up while being bored during a lecture <33

EX HUSBAND TOJI who invited you over in an attempt to make amends, but soon had other plans the moment you entered his home— the man dragging you up the stairs to fuck into your pussy as mercilessly as he could.

“missed me huh? you’re huggin’ it so tightly,” he sighs, watching as your ass bounced against his pelvis; your voice now hoarse from crying out his name.

“yes—toji, please— i’m gonna cum,” you warn, the man refusing to let up as he held you down and pounded into you faster and harder than before. he was so deep in you, and you were loving every waking moment of it— drowning out the past memories of him that once clouded your mind.

“he can’t fuck you like this, huh? because it’s mine right?”

you could only moan in response, eyes shutting tightly from the overwhelming amount of pleasure of your ex-husband rocking into you.

“it’s yours— yes! it’s yours, p-please make me cum!”

your wish was his command. the only sound that could be heard coming from that room was the commotion of toji’s heavy balls slapping against you as he took you to the edge— kissing and biting all over your neck and shoulders while trying his best to fuck you back into his life— because no one would be better than him.

EX BOYFRIEND GOJO who calls you up and is shocked when you answer. after browsing through your instagram feed, seeing that you’ve been glowing since you left him, he needed to prove to you that he was a better man.

what better way to do that than feasting on you in the back seat of his car?

“i can never get tired of tasting this sweet, pussy,” he groans, licking and sucking at your puffy, sensitive bud. you could only sit there and let him— because, if you were being brutally honest, you missed him too.

the tips of your acrylic nails grazed through his snowy, white hair; clawing and pulling at his scalp in a way of asking for more.

“‘toru— that feels so good, i feel like i’m—“

“like you’re what? like you’re gonna’ cum, pretty girl? go ahead, cum for me,” he says, spitting directly on your cunt and lapping at it again. he then stuck a finger in, using the combo to bring you closer and closer to making a mess.

his guttural moans pull you right back into his trap, your hips winding against him as he let you face fuck him like you used to do— when he was yours and you were his. he ate you so passionately, so sloppily, and so much better than any living soul.

EX HUSBAND NANAMI who is still so kind to you, even after your divorce. your heart getting the best of you when allow him into your house to put your daughter to sleep— what you didn’t expect was for him to put you to sleep too.

“god— y/n, i’ve missed you so much, my love,” he whimpers, letting you bounce on top of him as he takes it willingly. his hands gripped at your lower back as he guided your hips up and down, his teeth nibbling at your nipple as you rode him like a bike.

“k-kento, baby, i’m cumming—“

“yes, yes— cum for me. use me, come on, i know you can do it.” his sweet praise was like a song as you squatted over him, the tip of his leaking cock brushing against your cervix as he began to fuck up into you— bringing you closer and closer to your climax.

“f-fuck! nanami!” you cry, hands holding onto his shoulders tightly as he fucked you like he needed you. for a moment, you struggled to keep quiet. it’d slipped your mind that you had a sleeping daughter a few rooms over.

“wow— look at you. you see, i knew you could do it, my sweet girl. can i cum in you? please— baby?”

his ask wasn’t even close to necessary as you began to help him cum, your bounces becoming harder as the sound of skin slapping induced your pace. no matter the time, nor the place, you knew he’d be better than anyone you could ever imagine.

©️ all rights reserved to @suunmic. please refrain from copying or reposting as your own.

[silverskye13]

"Do I have a hels?"

Welsknight stopped in the middle of picking a cornflower. He hesitated, separated it delicately from its stem, and dropped it in his dye basket. "How should I know?"

Rendog shrugged. He crushed his pestle against a mortar full of dandelions, staining his fingers yellow. "Well, you're kind of the authority on the hels stuff, right? You got the first one."

"Xisuma got the first one," Wels pointed out, picking another handful of cornflowers. He carefully sifted the leaves out of the bunch, scattering the summer greens around his feet.

"Huh, I kinda forgot about Evil X." Ren grabbed another bunch of dandelions to grind. "He seems a little too different from X to be a hels, doesn't he?"

Welsknight shrugged, "I wouldn't know."

"Can you ask him? Uh-- the Helsknight guy." Ren startled, like he hadn't expected to ask his question aloud. He cleared his throat and stammered, "I mean-- obviously don't if it'd be distressing. I don't want to put you in a bad place, bro."

Ren's ears twitched nervously, and it takes Wels a long moment to realize he'd been staring. He picks another cornflower. "Ask Helsknight what? About Evil X? Or if you have a helsmet out there somewhere?"

"Oh! Well, the helsmet thing, if you don't mind." Ren said, and he leaned against the table he'd been making dye on, careful to keep his hands away from anything they could stain. Not that it mattered. His beard was already streaked with yellow and orange, as was his hair. There was a bright yellow dot on his right collarbone in the shape of a fingerprint where he'd tried to wipe away some fallen dye and only managed to rub it in more. "I kinda wonder what he's like, yanno? I mean, I've done the whole evil version thing before with Grimdog, and he was mostly just me but a little more darkly dramatic."

"A hels isn't really--" Welsknight trailed off and huffed a sigh. He'd already explained this a thousand times.

"Right, I know they're not evil exactly," Ren waved a hand dismissively, and a dotting of yellow splattered on the table. "But you know, I always kinda saw myself as like, the chaotic good type. So by definition my opposite double would have to be evil, wouldn't they?"

Wels shrugged. It made sense. That's how he and Helsknight seemed to work at least. Ren shoved a handful of poppies into his mortar and started grinding, working his way towards a vibrant orange dye. "Anyway it was just a thought my dude. Like I said, don't put yourself out over it. I like my Welsknight content -- not chasing shadows. You feel me?"

Welsknight chuckled, "I feel you, Ren."

The two lapsed into silence. Welsknight went back to picking cornflowers, and Ren grabbed another handful of poppies to add to his mix of dye. It was a comfortable silence, one filled with busy hands and the rustle of wind through oak and birch trees. This kind of early season gathering was pleasant, just before all the big flower farms were made, and dye-making was more visceral and fragrant.

A cloud passed over the sun, and a breeze whipped through, scattering some of the flowers from Wels' basket. Ren shivered and glared up at the sky like it'd offended him. Then he squinted as the cloud passed over and bright sunlight glared his sunglasses.

"He said you and your hels are similar," Welsknight said, and he grabbed another handful of flowers. Wels wrinkled his nose. "He's being a dick about it."

"Well tell him I'll whoop his ass for you, brother." Ren grinned.

Wels tilted his head to the side. "He says your hels version is strong and vicious, and followed by the scent of blood and tragedy."

"I didn't know tragedy had a smell."

"I think tragedy probably smells like whatever cave spider spawners are made of."

Ren laughed. He picked up his mortar, fixing to dump the freshly made dye into his half-finished concrete mix.

Something overtook Wels then. A shadow. Dark, malicious and vindictive, and he found himself speaking in a voice that wasn't completely his. "The blood is dripping into my eyes. I can't see. I've been blinded by the violence my hand--"

There was the sound of something shattering, and whatever grabbed ahold of Wels vanished from him like a breeze. He spun to face Ren who stood over the shattered remains of his mortar, orange dye splattered in the grass. His hands, coated in a swirling of yellow and red, shook.

"You okay, Ren?"

"Fine," Ren lied rather obviously, his voice cracking halfway through the word. "I just uh... Wasn't expecting..."

Ren swallowed hard, shook his head, and knelt to pick up the pieces of his mortar. They didn't talk about hels again.

[theemporium]

[REQUESTS OPEN]

[3.5k] or, in which king steve isn’t as high and mighty as people think he is. (smut)

.

“Woah, slow down there, Harrington.”

The spiked punch burned down his throat, most likely laced with whatever cheap vodka Tina had managed to salvage with her dodgy contacts. But Steve couldn’t bring himself to care. He was young and stupid and in desperate need to numb the feelings in his brain at this stupid Halloween party because it was the next best distraction.

He knew in the morning he would come to regret the drinking and whatever bad decision that followed, but right now all he could think about was that Billy fucking Hargrove was breathing down his neck and people kept whispering about Nancy Wheeler leaving him for Jonathon Byers of all people, and Steve was just tired of it all.

He was Steve Harrington.

King Steve.

And right now, King Steve wanted to get drunk off his ass and enjoy his last Halloween party like any normal senior would.

“Don’t get weak on me now,” he retorted as he threw the red solo cup to the floor, looking at Tommy H over the sunglasses that rested on the tip of his nose. “You’re two drinks behind.”

“Think your drunk ass could beat me at beer pong?” Tommy H teased, a giggling Carol tucked under his arm.

“I can beat you any day any time, dickhead,” Steve flashed him a grin. “I’m King Steve, assholes!” Cheers and whoops of excitement erupted around them, and things felt normal for a few seconds.

And then he saw you.

You weren’t new to Hawkins, but you were new to Steve.

Maybe if he had paid attention, he would see you passing in hallways or realise that you shared a class for a whole year in your junior year—Miss Smith’s calculus class. Maybe if he wasn’t so busy chasing after a girl that never truly loved him back or fighting interdimensional monsters, he would have noticed you earlier.

But he noticed you now.

Tucked away in the corner of the room, red solo cup in your hand as you watched the party around you with curious eyes. He wasn’t totally sure what you were dressed as, but that could be said for half the people in the room right now. All he knew was that he wanted to know more about you, he wanted to know who you were dressed as and why you chose them and what on god’s green fucking earth you wore on your lips to make them look so damn kissable.

He wanted you.

“Hold your horses, big boy,” A voice sounded from his left and he turned to see Carol giving him a wicked grin. “Don’t even try it.”

“Try what?” Steve answered dumbly.

“You’ve got no chance with her,” Carol told him like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Steve scoffed. “You don’t know that.”

“Everyone knows that,” This time it was one of Tina’s lackeys who spoke, he was pretty sure her name was Vicki. “Total lone wolf. People try but nobody gets through.”

“What’s her deal?” he asked, eyes narrowing slightly on you as he listened to the girls beside him. If anything, everything they were saying just made him more intrigued.

Carol shrugged. “Guess nobody around here that interests her.”

“Interesting,” Steve hummed.

“You ain’t got a chance, Harrington, pack it up before you bruise your own ego,” Tommy H spoke up, snickers and giggles breaking out around them.

“Maybe you don’t,” Steve spoke as he finally turned to look at the group around him, something quite like determination and arrogance shining in his eyes. “But she hasn’t met me yet.”

“And if she rejects you?” Tommy H asked.

“Who can resist Steve Harrington?” he answered with a smirk on his lips and something dangerous glimmering in his gaze.

Steve pushed through the crowd—or more accurately, let the crowd part around him—as he made his way towards you. His eyes fixed on you as you bobbed your head to the music pumping through the speakers, unaware of the man approaching you.

It wasn’t until he was a few steps away from you that you finally caught onto his presence, looking up from the red solo cup and giving him an odd look as he stopped right in front of you.

“Can I help you?” you spoke, blunt and direct, and it threw him off for a second.

Steve was used to girls and guys alike fawning over him, worshipping him. And maybe it was a little big-headed to think you would be the same. But he hadn’t expected you to be so unbothered. And he would be lying if he said it didn’t peak his interests more.

“Yeah, you can actually,” Steve flashed you a smile and made himself comfortable on the spot next to you against the wall. “You could tell me your name.”

“Don’t know all the names of your subjects, King Steve?” you raised your brows, and Steve could have sworn he saw your painted lips twitch upwards.

“Didn’t wanna come off as a creep,” he deflected with a shrug. “And maybe I just wanted an excuse to talk to you.”

“Yeah?” you mused, head tilting to one side.

“Yeah,” Steve smiled down at you before his eyes darted down to your outfit, shamelessly looking you up and down. He was clueless and honestly couldn’t care less about the costume, instead focusing on the way the fabric draped over your figure and exposed a little bit of your thigh when you shifted in your spot. “Madonna?”

“Carrie, pre-prom. Didn’t feel like washing fake blood out of my hair tonight,” you corrected as you returned the favour, taking in Steve’s outfit for the first time. Your eyes lingered on the black shirt clung to his torso, the jeans snug against his thighs. “Footloose?”

“Risky Business,” Steve winked.

“Tragic,” you commented as your eyes found his again. “This party might’ve actually been interesting if you showed up in tighty-whities.”

Steve bit back his laugh. “If you wanted to see me in underwear, sweetheart, you can just ask. I promise I’ll put on a good show for you.”

“You are very sure of yourself, Harrington,” you murmured as you took a sip from your cup, watching him over the rim.

“I like to call it self-confidence,” Steve retorted, deciding to bite the bullet as he shuffled closer to you until your arms were brushing.

“Hm, and what do your little friends who have been ogling us for the last fifteen minutes call it?” you asked and watched in amusement as his head snapped over to the group he was hanging around earlier.

Tommy H let out a shrieking wolf whistle, the girls around him laughing and snickering despite the look Steve was giving them. You saw Carol making some kissing faces, followed by some stupidly incoherent crude comment from her boyfriend. And maybe if the sight of Steve blushing didn’t greatly entertain you, you would’ve been a bit pissed off.

“So, what did they offer you?” you asked finally and watched as his head snapped back to look at you.

“Who offer me what?” he asked with his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Your little posse,” you nodded back towards them. “Talk to the loner and bag twenty bucks?”

“I wanted to talk to you myself,” Steve told you, almost looking offended by your comment. “Scout’s honour.”

Your lips twitched. “Were you even a boy scout?”

“Well,” Steve winced a little, scratching the back of his neck. “No, but the sentiment stands.”

“So, what exactly did Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington want to do with lil ol’ me?” you asked him, tilting your head back to look at him.

“You really like using these nicknames, don’t you?” Steve pointed out.

“It just…intrigues me,” you said with a shrug.

“What does?”

But you simply grinned. “You’re avoiding my question.”

“And you’re avoiding mine,” he retorted just as quickly.

“You really play up this act, don’t you?” you questioned him, eyes narrowing on the man in front of you as though you’d be able to see all his secrets. “It’s cute.”

“You think I’m cute?” Steve teased.

“You clearly have selective hearing too,” you hummed in amusement.

“Well, if it’s any consolation, I think you are really pretty too,” Steve told you with a smile so sweet that it was hard to think for a second.

“Yeah?” you murmured as he stepped closer, leaning against the wall with one shoulder so his body was facing you, almost trapping you in the corner. “I think you say that to a lot of girls, King Steve.”

“And yet I still think you’re the prettiest girl I’ve seen,” His eyes glancing down, watching as you tucked your bottom lip between your teeth. He gulped a little.

“Quite the sweet talker,” you commented.

“I prefer smooth operator,” Steve shrugged.

“Sounds like you’re just drunk and wanting to get your dick wet, Harrington,” you said, knowing full well it was probably the spiked punch getting to his head, making him more arrogant than usual.

“I’m not that drunk—” And yet just as he spoke, he took another step forward—more like stumbled forward—and let his hand knock a little too close to yours. He watched with wide eyes as the contents of your red solo cup spilt all down the front of your dress.

“Holy shit,” Steve muttered in horror, his hands stretched out in front of him like he was reaching for you before thinking better of it. “I’m so sorry, shit. I didn’t mean to—”

But you didn’t yell at him like he expected, and you didn’t swear either. Instead, you laughed.

You laughed and you looked up at him like everything was right in the world, and in all honesty it was hard for him not to laugh back.

“Fitting,” you huffed out between laughs. “Really helped me complete the look, Harrington.”

“What can I say, I’m a stickler for festive rules,” he murmured abashedly. “Jeez, I’m sorry. There’s a bathroom upstairs, meant to be off-limits but I’m sure Tina won’t mind. Maybe we can get the stain out before it’s too bad.”

“Lead the way.”

Not thinking twice about the action, Steve grabbed your hand and was only partially surprised when you intertwined your fingers with his. He led you through the throng of dancing teens and sweaty bodies, tugging you to keep up as you made your way towards the main staircase that led up to a much quieter area.

Walking past a variety of doors before you reached the bathroom, Steve pushed the door open and flicked the lights on. He dropped your hand—much to his own disappointment—and began shuffling through drawers and cupboards to find a hand towel or something else to help get the stain out of your dress.

He didn’t hear the door close behind him or the click of the lock, and what he certainly didn’t expect was to turn around and see you shrugging yourself out of your dress.

“I—woah! Okay, I…uh…I’m still here?” he exclaimed, dropping whatever was in his hands as they clattered to the floor. “Do you…uh…do you want me to give you some privacy or…?”

“What? King Steve has never seen a half-naked girl?” you mused, grinning at his blushing cheeks and stuttering words.

“Well, no, I have…I was just…prepared for them,” he murmured shyly, clearing his throat as he contemplated shuffling out of the bathroom with his hands still over his eyes.

“Doesn’t seem like it,” you sang, placing the ruined dress on the counter top as you turned the tap on. You grabbed one of the towels he dropped earlier, wetting it under the tap with some soap before trying to rub out the stain but it wasn’t going very far. “You know, you’d be a lot more useful if you actually used your hands instead of standing there with them covering your pretty face, Harrington.”

He gulped. “You sure?”

You didn’t hold back your smile. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

Steve tried.

He really, really tried not to stare when he dropped his hands but it was hard not to.

Not when you were standing there, a few feet away from him, in a pair of matching bra and panties, slightly bent over the counter as you furiously tried to rub the stain out of your dress.

Not when your lips were pressed together in a slight pout, eyebrows furrowed in concentration and wide eyes staring hopefully down at your dress.

The sight shouldn’t turn him on as much as it is, but he really cannot help himself.

And then you lifted your head, your gaze catching his through the mirror as you took in his flustered appearance and parted lips. You couldn’t help but smirk, watching as he shamelessly dragged his eyes over your figure, shifting in his spot as though it would do anything to hide the tent in his jeans.

“You okay there?”

Steve’s eyes snapped up as he flashed you a sheepish grin, the bathroom light doing nothing to hide the burning blush on his cheeks.

“Y-Yeah,” he said and nodded his head furiously. “I’m great, fantastic even!”

You spun around so you were facing him, watching him for a few moments before you took small steps towards him. He watched as you stalked towards him like a predator, confident and purposeful steps until you were almost inches away from him.

“You look a little hot,” you murmured, looking up at him with a faux innocent look, and he knew it was utter bullshit but he was putty in your hands by that point. “You sure you’re feeling okay?”

He opened his mouth to reply but the words died in his throat as you raised your hand to gently cup his face, your fingers tracing along his cheekbone. Your touch sent shivers down his spine and your smile was so pretty and you smelt so good, it was hard for him to even focus on words in that moment.

“King Steve…everyone acts like you are at the top of the ladder, the big boss around,” you mused as your fingers danced along his jaw and down his neck, feeling his pulse beat wildly under your touch. “But I think it’s all an act.”

Steve fought to keep his eyes open as your hand travelled along his collar and up the back of his neck, tangling your fingers in the locks of his hair. He didn’t even care that he spent hours on it this morning, not when everything about you felt too good.

“You wanna know what I think?” you asked and Steve nodded lightly, not daring to trust his voice in that moment.

“I think,” you spoke and gave his hair a sharp tug, smiling when you heard the small whine he let out. “King Steve likes to get down on his knees.”

Your name left his lips in a breathless sigh, his hands moving to grip your hips and pull you closer, to feel more of you pressed against him. You didn’t waste any time in pulling his head down, letting his lips meet yours.

The kisses shared were fast and sloppy and they left you breathless. As you staggered back to the counter, the dress long forgotten and the party still wildly active downstairs, you had very little else on your mind except for the way his hands were tracing up and down your sides.

“Don’t get shy on me now, Harrington,” you muttered against his lips as you jumped up on the counter, pulling him to stand between your legs. “Heard you were meant to be a real people pleaser in bed.”

“Fuck,” he hissed through clenched teeth as he gripped your hips, his head ducking down to your neck. “You are a…fucking wet dream brought to life, you know that?”

“Surprisingly enough, that is the first time I have ever been told that,” you sighed, head falling back as you feel his teeth lightly scrape against your pulse point and make your toes curl.

“Well you are,” he groaned against your neck, rolling his hips against yours to show you just how serious he was. “Fuck, you have no idea.”

“Hm,” Your hand travelled between your bodies, cupping him over his jeans and slowly pressing your palm along his shaft. “I think I have a pretty good idea.”

“Shit, please,” he whimpered against your neck.

Your finger worked to undo the button of his jeans and push them down enough until they were pooled at just above his knees, his boxers quickly following. You ran your fingers along his cock, your thumb gently rubbing along the tip as he whined and bucked against your hand.

“You look so good like this,” you whispered, one hand gripping his hair and your lips pressed against his ear. “A shame this bathroom isn’t bigger, bet you would make some pretty noises if I put your cock in my mouth.”

“Shit,” he whimpered and lifted his head, pressing his lips against yours hard.

It didn’t take long for Steve to be moaning into the kiss, your hand leisurely stroking his cock as he gripped your thighs like his own personal stress relief, biting down on your neck to muffle the sounds he was making. You doubted anyone could hear you over the music but you didn’t care, some part of you thrilled at the idea of waking up tomorrow morning to Steve’s marks littered along your neck.

“Need to fuck you,” you murmured between shared kisses, pulling your hand away from his cock despite his whines to wiggle your panties off and letting them fall to the ground.

The moans that left his mouth were broken and pathetic, but Jesus, you loved it. The way he whispered your name like a prayer as he bottomed out in you, his face nuzzled into your neck and his hands gripping your ass as if there was any physical way to have you closer.

“Shit, you’re big,” you whined, knowing very well the comment would go to his head but you couldn’t care in that moment. Not when you felt so full, when he felt so good. “Fuck, give me a moment.”

“Anything you want, baby, anything you want,” he whispered against your neck, pressing soft kisses along your skin that felt so different to the sloppy, passionate kisses you shared before. It made your stomach twist, made you wrap your legs around his hips and tug him closer.

“Fuck me like you hate me, Harrington,” Your warm breath fanning over his lips as you spoke.

And Steve, being the people pleaser he was, had no qualms in listening to your instructions.

Your nails dug into his back, almost desperate to rip that black shirt off his torso and scratch down his back as he pounded into you, hips rutting against yours as he let out desperate little moans and whines of your name mixed with other incoherent profanities.

You loved the way he moaned into your ear, the way he whispered how good you felt and how he could do this over and over again and never fucking complain a day in his life. He tells you how beautiful you are, how he loves the way you pull his hair and the way you nibble on his neck when you don’t want to scream out.

You nuzzled your face into his chest as you reached your high, your orgasm washing over you in a white, hot wave. Your muscles tensing and your body clinging to his, and his name leaving your lips like it was the only word you knew.

Steve was close behind you, a few more thrusts and he knew he couldn’t hold it back anymore. Not when you were whispering filthy promises in his ear, putting more ideas in his head that he knew he would be thinking about in shower with his hand wrapped around his cock and this memory on replay. Not when you nipped his ear, telling him how badly you needed to feel him come inside you.

And maybe Steve expected the moments after to be awkward or tense. For there to be some lingering emotion or even regret from your part as you both shuffled around the small bathroom to look presentable.

But just as you had been doing the rest of the night, you took him by surprise as you fixed up your ruined dress like it was nothing and ruffled your hair to try and hide the last twenty minutes. It was almost pointless but neither of you seemed to care.

Not when you turned to him and flashed him that smile that made his knees weak. Not as you sauntered over and grabbed the lapels of his jacket, pulling his lips down on yours once again. Not as your hand slipped into his front pocket, stepping back with a smug grin on your face and mischief shining in your eyes.

“Meet me at your car in five minutes,” you told him and shook the keys you had swiped from his jeans. “My parents are away all week…got the whole place to myself.”

“Fuck,” Steve breathed out.

“It gets a bit lonely, Harrington, ‘m sure you can keep me entertained.”

He barely had time to reply before you slipped out of the bathroom, his car keys with you and your panties replacing the pocket they were in moments ago.

“A walking wet dream,” he muttered to himself before quickly following you out, not a single care about the party or anything else in his mind other than you.

.

[animesllut666]

He is.. my step dad.

Characters: Toji X GNReader

Anime: Jujutsu kaisen

Type: Headcannon

Warnings: Cursing, fighting, rudeness, yelling, teasing, brief mention of animal abuse, bullies.

Summary: 14 year old … Fushiguro just discovered they have a new step dad. What would life be like for them?

He wouldn't be one of those new step dad's that would try too get you too like him

Nope, he wouldn't even care if you cussed him out or even threw a knife at him

100% would laugh at your attempt to scare him

You fought with him for a while

Picking him apart, teasing him, talking over him etc.. pretty rude towards him

Then again.. this guy just showed up one day an your mom was shocked by your annoyance.

Slowly you start to get used to him ... Somewhat

Picks you up from school, just to piss you off. Since he IS good looking, it caused a steer amongst students AND faculty.

Learns to bring Megumi an Tsumiki along, cuz you weren't as vicious towards him

Finds out that you stand up to bullies, an would back you up one day.

You would make meals for everyone (kids) an leave a little for him

"You need help gumdrop?" "No, go away Toji" stands back while you whoop some ass.

He would call you nicknames just to piss you off. Pats your head if you were fully done growing, lifts you up cuz the man is STRONG, he loves to tease you.

He didn't mind, he found it nice that you even left him some

I SERIOUSLY THINK HE A HIDDEN COOK, CAN MAKE ANYTHING

So imagine your shock when he makes a beef Wellington, an brings out a homemade gravy that made you melt

An start to accept him.. sort of

"What are you doing?" You found him one day sharping all his knifes an polishing his guns

Your mother knew of his occupation, but told him to keep it from you

"Ugh.. my hobby?"

"Are ... Are you an assassin or something?"

"Yes."

Imagine that conversation with your mom an you, "HE AN ASSASSIN! HOW... HOW WHAT THE FUCK?! HOW THE HELL DO I KNOW HE WONT KILL US? OR EVEN KNOW HE WONT GIVE US UP FOR MONEY OR SOMETHING?!" (... Megumi...)

"I wouldn't get much for you, just maybe 1 yen."

Threw a knife and spoon an this motherfucker caught them so fast an sent them back.

😲 <- you -> 🤔 thinking for a second

"Can.. can you teach me?"

Que your weird love hate teaching relationship with him

He teaches you how to fight, much against your mother wishes.

Little did any of them know, you weren't the purest angel either

"No, if your going to kick me in the gut, put your full strength behind it."

After awhile, you both kind of bond, an he starts to tell you about his past. You both had similar childhoods, abandoned an alone..till a child an sibling came in.

Though, you do have a hate relationship (mainly you), if anyone tries to say anything negative about him best believe you were in there face

"If anyone is going to say negative things about him. It'll be me!"

"Hey! He maybe a deadbeat but he is OUR DEADBEAT" CUE HIS "YEAH.. THE FUCK?!"

One time someone took you hostage, an his training paid off cuz he arrived to see the guys beaten to a blood pulp.

"huh, could have killed them" "Toji! Can I get some praise?"

Straight out found his last name was Zenin an teepeed the Zenin estate with the help of Megumi an Tsumiki one night on the way back from the park

Nearly died, but hey... It was worth it.

"Why did you do that? You co-" "Fuck the Zenin Clan, they bitches"

🥲 had to quickly wipe a tear from his eye

"But also fuck you, cuz you ate the last of my cake"

He would *try* to understand an watch anime with you

Even started to read manga

"I wish I could get hit with Oikawa serve"

"Ugh.. what?" "Damn, if only Levi could yell at ME like that." "What the fuck."

Toji would be the type to slowly warm up to you, an bring you little souvenirs from some of his missions across Japan or even abroad

"It's a keychain" "I found it.." proceeds to hand you a *stolen* shirt saying "I love Kyoto" gives you a fucking Oikawa cut out

Toji the type of step dad that would help (or try) with school work, but then suggest to just threaten the teacher

"You have parent teacher conference? I'll go."

Imagine the teacher face seeing this beef (terrifying) cake walk in behind you

After that your mom banned him from going to teacher conferences

She also told you both not to go grocery shopping together anymore either

Ya... May have came back with more food an cops on your heels..

Towards the end of his life, you both became to pees in a pod.

He let you do his hair one time, pigtails all around. May have put some pink an blue dye in his hair.

100% would call you into school if ya were sick (or not)

If you were sick, he would try his best at making you some food. He was taking notes from the times the other two had been sick

I feel like if you (or the other kids) got hurt, too the point he had to take you to the hospital..he would panic

"Oh my god.. OMG WHAT DO I DO?"

Fucking sweet Tsumiki "they need to go too the hospital, their fever is 103"

You two were a force to be reckon with, both verbally an physically

Saw someone getting picked on? Both right there verbally telling them off.

Noticed a kitten or puppy getting abused? Toji had to hold you back from killing the people.

The night before he goes out (when he dies the next day), you tell him to be careful

"Don't die.. I have a weird feeling about this one"

Pats your head, an starts to tease you about warning about him. Of course you tell him it's not like that, but deep down you both know something will go down the next day

When you get word that he was dead, an that he arranged for Megumi to be sold to the Zenin Clan. All hell broke lose, your mom was gone, an you were taking the kids an were on the run for a few months

Till that weird albino rat showed up one day

"Here, I'll take you all in, but you.. have to say I'm handsome"

You fucking took Megumi an Tsumiki an walked away

[meallme]

Rodrick x Reader - 【Quick Scene】

Hi, I came up with this last night, it’s really short but imma share cause why not. Enjoy ig :) 

rating: U

genre: just joking around

word count: 618

summary: you and Rodrick are best friends. That’s bout it, it’s just some banter.

A/N: sorry not sorry if you find this cringy, I was in my shifting mood sooooo here we are. also suggestions are welcome:) it’s not like I have anything else to do.

You picked up your skateboard as you walked up the Heffley’s drive and was met with loud heavy metal. You smiled and made a beeline for the basement. You caught a glance of Susan peeping around the corner to see who’s breaking into their house. “Morning Mrs Heffley!” You shouted over your shoulder as you ran down the stairs. You were met with the band, playing to their hearts content. You smiled at Rodrick who gave you a half-assed salute back. You collapsed on a bean bag as Löded Diper continued their song. You found yourself tapping along to the beat and watching Rodrick play. His expressions always cracked you up, they were passionate yet ... dumb. As soon as they finished you clapped and Ben took a long bow. 

“I’ll get us drinks, keep practising” Rodrick told them, stepping away from his drumkit and towards the stairs. The band members shared their responses and started to individually practice. “So-” Rodrick leant against the doorframe and looked down at you, “What did you think?” 

You stood up, “It was pretty good, Ben played very well, Chris exceptionally well. You.... were average.”

“Oh come on.” He rolled his eyes 

“What you think you deserve a better adjective?” He tilted his head to the side. “Fine what about... adequate.” 

“Adequate?” Rodrick looked at you with pure confusion. You’d forgotten that this  is the guy who somehow gets his dad to do all his book reports for him.

“You need a thesaurus.” You patted his shoulder and started to walk up the stairs. “Anyway I do have a suggestion for a line change.”

“Oh yeah?” You two walked up and out of the basement and into the kitchen as you shared your thoughts with him. “That is... actually good. I see.” He smirked, “Who knew you could be helpful for once.” He passed you a tray and you dropped it. 

“Whoops, I’ve been helpful for once. Mustn't overdue it.” You smiled 

“I hate you.”  He picked up the tray 

“Hate you more Heffley.” You watched him pour and place the drinks on the tray. He then tried to slide the tray off the counter, struggling to keep either side from tilting. “Rodrick-” You sighed

“I knew you’d hel-”

“Could you be quicker? I’m quite thirsty.” You remarked, spinning on your heels and exiting the room. You closed the door to the kitchen and the basement behind you to ‘help’ Rodrick. You went back down and sat on your beanbag. 

“Where’s the drinks?” Chris asked

“Rodrick's bringing them. Don’t be expecting a full glass.” You chuckled. They looked at you perplexed as you heard a massive THUD from upstairs. You peered over and saw an annoyed Rodrick cautiously make his way down the stairs. He scowled at you and you noticed his shirt was dripping wet and the drinks were all different volumes. “Here guys.” He placed down the tray with great difficulty. 

“Took you long enough.” You grinned and went to grab a drink when Rodrick snatched the last one from right under your nose.

“Sorry princess, you see, I spilled one trying to open the door and sadly, that was yours.” He sipped it dramatically and smirked. Your mouth hung open in full-on disgrace. The goddamn audacity.

“I would offer you mine if I didn’t take a sip already.” Ben sniffed, “Unless you don’t mind-”

“I'm okay.” You interrupted and gave him a weary smile, “Thank you though.” You waited until just the right moment then kicked the back of Rodrick's knee who spilt his drink and nearly fell flat on his face.

“You little-”

You sniggered and sunk back into your bean bag, “Looks like you spilt another, princess.”

[asheewrites]

Doctors Visit #2 - pt 1

It was Thursday. And it was 14:20. Just like last time. So.

It was still a bit surreal to stand in front of Raphael’s clinic again. An angels clinic. Because Raphael said he should come back for treatment. Not what kind of treatment, but for treatment.

No African bird this time, only rushing water, swooshing trees and a blue songbird that constantly changes names. Pleasant sounds, in general.

After a breath he walked into the house he was thrown out of not too long ago.  

„Hel-lo Amurel” Asmodeus grinned at the angel in charge of the counter, leaned on it while she sorted the papers in front of her.

Then she looked up and smiled pleasantly: “Hello. hottest divine embodiment of the darker kind in existence. I suppose you wish to have an appointment with Raphael?”

“Oh, so what a greeting. And that from such a lovely specimen as yourself. I see you changed your hair?”

They put a hand to their head, flattening the second stand with more ‘character than the others.

Their perfect smile twitched, just a second, and they answered: “… maybe. Maybe they react a bit more to my mood than anticipated”

“Well, it certainly suits you,” because it did. Angels were in need of some character.

They glanced sideways at Asmodeus, then at the file in front of them, shook their head and smirked. Smirking angels. What a sight.

“Thank you. But if you’d please follow me to the doctor’s office? He’ll see you momentarily,” they were already on the way, indicating the right way with their hand, clutching his file with the other. … he wondered what was written on there. Maybe also the ‘diagnostic findings’. Admittedly, he was a bit curious.

Maybe next time. For now, he said: “I’d follow you wherever you want me to” and did exactly that, resuming the position he had last time, kicking his legs over the armrest and grabbing the nearest pillow.

At least he was certain that the slight air current definitely was Raphael’s doing. If consciously or subconsciously was up for debate, but the currents were different in each room. It was not natural.

Click.

The door closed behind the angel and he padded – still barefoot – over to the armchair Asmodeus was lounging in.

“Welcome again to the clinic, thanks for showing up,” he said, seating himself and flipping open Asmodeus’ file. He didn’t read in it, but clicked a pen to be ready.

“Well, after the little show from last week, I just had to – fantastic wings, by the way,” he smiled at the ‘doctor’

And said doctor tilted his head and scribbled down a few words in the file. He still answered in an amused voice: “Thank you. They are rather new”

“Their status is still marvellous, if this is what you do when you are stressed. I understand the stress to work with that many people. And being responsible for them. But I have my own way of dealing with that. Maybe you could need some company next time you need to… blow off some steam?” Asmodeus raised both his brows.

Raphael pecked the notepad with his pen, slight frown in place,then finally said: “I think sparring with you would seriously break rules. And I can not argue that as neglible, at all. Wouldn’t you say so as well?“

Asmodeus laughed. It breaks out of him, not much he could do. Then said: “Aww, sweetheart... You think I mean sparring...”

Another scribbling on the pad, while he saidapparently genuinely curious: “Are you suggesting something else towards your doctor?“

“Well, I would hope so. Which do you think would be more controversial? Inviting you to bed or to fight?”

Raphael tapped the pen to his lip and seemed to give it serios thought, staring at the ceiling, then concluded: “Bed. Due to the stipulation of the fight being nonlethal and Rage not being your sin. Inviting me to bed – with assumptions - would directly correspond and it would count as... well, a temptation,” he nodded, apparently happy, then added: “Also: I can fix us both after a fight. No consequences“

“Ahh, see, a temptation. That might be a spot of fun for me... but no good for you, is it? Then I suppose a fight’s all we’ve got. Unless, of course, you wanted to invite me to bed?” There was always a chance.

But Raphael didn’t even flinch: „A doctor never invites a patient to bed if they have any respect for their own craft. Or accepts such an offer, naturally. 'Misplaced trust' is what you call it, I believe?“

Asmodeus shrugged: “Naturally. But my trust would be quite securely placed if you were to, say, whoop my ass in the desert platonically, yes?” Sometimes, angels were absurd.

'Yes. Since rules can be implemented quite easily. As an angel, I would definitely adhere to them. And nothing should influ-,' Raphael stopped talking. And his eyes went wide. He scribbled on the notepad, striking out several things, apparently, and then said: „And here I forgot that I do know some of your history. And I apologise. No desert fights – no fights, actually - with the archangel Raphael. I will not bring it up again“

“Aw, Raphael. You’re too good for your own... good. For what it’s worth, you’re welcome to fight me in the desert whenever you like, or anywhere else, for that matter. But I don’t think you would really hurt me, even if I got down on my knees and begged you to.”

His eyes snapped up when he said that, brows slightly drawn: "Naturally, I would not try to harm you. My way of incapacitating someone does not include harm. It's against my very being, but you obviously figured that already” The angel took a breath, then continued: “But… as for your… request? There is a distinction between harm and hurt. I think I hurt a lot more people than most. So, ah, do you want me to hurt you? I certainly can. But would you actually want me to?"

Still amused, he stared at Raphael, only a moment of thought here, then said: “Can you, now? And how do you think you would do that? Pop a rib head back in for me? Reset an old broken bone?”

"Oh. Everyone has slight imperfections. No exceptions. And healing those will hurt, if it needs to be done fast or on a schedule even more so. I would need to figure out if -and how much - harmed you were. And you would need to tell me how much you want to be hurt… if this is… what you want.” He didn’t look particularly happy. But confident in this. Body language sure. Huh.

If he grabbed his pillow a little tighter, it certainly could not be seen. Asmodeus said:“Come now, Raphael, is it really hurting if you’re helping? I’m not so sure it would have the same effect.”

Now Raphael tilted his head again and made another note. It ended with: "It would have the effect of fixing a few problems your body has. Plus pain. How much... is still up to you. It won't feel like I help at the moment I treat you. So… maybe that would produce the desired effect? I can only assume what that effect actually is. If you wish to explore the possibility, you know where to find me“

The angel sat up straight and smiled: „Until then... How are you?"

[olivenight17]

So... uh, hi again??

Lmao I almost feel awkward posting here after being so dead for so long. I’d like to apologize for that by the way, and I did want to thank you for the requests that were recently sent in! I see them, and I have ideas for them, I just...need to have time to write them. But I see them, and they will be written, pretty soon in fact!

So, the long and short of it is that...quarantine happened, completely paralyzed me in my own fear with my strictly online classes and gave me such anxiety that I froze up completely and kinda lost my motivation to write. That, and I also wasn’t doing my coursework because I got so scared over not knowing what to do or how to go about doing it or what the plan even was for it that I just ignored it...and then I got my ass handed to me promptly and deservedly so for it. But, I needed that ass whooping badly because it also got my ass in gear enough to create a game plan for myself. And I’ve made up for so much lost time, I’m already completely done with one of my courses!! And I’ll be finished with the next by Monday! And, keep in mind, all of the work for both of these courses won’t even be due until june 9th. So yeah, job well done, me *pat pat* I gotta say, I’m really proud of myself for getting here, and it feels good as all of hel to not being so stressed that I can’t sleep, and so anxious that my hair was actually falling out. I’m really happy now.

So, because of this, I will be back in the writing game soon, my friends!! Your requests shall be fulfilled at long last!! Because the second Tuesday arrives??? I’m gonna spend the whole.day.writing. Just for this blog, and I don’t think I’ll ever feel better for it.

Until then, guys!!

[rayshippouuchiha]

Terrible terrible cracky thought, that I need to share.

What if Hel was actually Loki’s mother and raised him too? So world where Odin didn’t seal Hel away but put her under heavy magical bindings to prevent any plotting or attempts at subjugation.

But listen, magical bindings are a pain in the ass, especially when your hypocritical dad has made them prevent you doing things you like, like murder, chaos, taunting your new hostage step-mom, etc. So Hel is constantly looking for entertainment that isn’t restricted, and oddly enough sleeping around isn’t (Odin didn’t want to think about his daughter having sex, nor did he consider anyone else would).

Only during the Jotun war (which Odin drags her along to fight in, hypocrite) there is a ‘whoops’ encounter with King Laufey (Only half of which was to piss off dear old dad by sleeping with the enemy) which resulting in her returning to Asgard with a kid…. not exactly as planned.

So Asgard then gets to be terrorized by both Hel and baby Loki and Hel raises him to glorious chaos and schadenfreude because Asgard deserves it.

…And Hel finally bonds somewhat with her step-mom because she needs parenting advice from someone and she certainly isn’t asking Odin.

(Frigga has decided that Odin rather has this mess coming and that he can sort it out himself, meanwhile she is going to let her kid get to know his sister & nephew).

…And all of it started because a stupid thought of Hel & Loki fighting over your Toni and Hel claiming Loki should respect his mother and back away from the stunning lady while Loki arguing he saw her first ;)

~~~~

I love this entire thing!

[spdtactics-a]

Marth had given this a lot of thought... and though he hated it, he had made a decision. Ah, there was the Summoner. She held the same authority as the new king on this, so... "Excuse me, Coralin. Do you have a moment?" He cleared his throat, an excuse to get some second to formulate his thoughts. "I'd like to be reassigned to castle defense. There is someone we're very likely to meet in Hel, and... I'm not as strong as Lord Alfonse. If we did meet him, I would be a liability." 1/2

King Cornelius had, after all, been a great warrior in his own right. Someone like Hel wouldn’t hesitate to add him to her army. “I apologise if this upsets your plans, and I understand if I am to be decried as a coward after this. But my duty in this army is to rally and empower the others, and if I am to face this person I would only do the exact opposite. It’s simply not something I am ready for. So… please.”

“heeeey. hey, hey, hey. don’t put yourself down over this.” 

   you frown, not liking the way marth is berating himself for taking up alfonse’s offer to return to the castle. there’s likely a story there – one that had impacted him greatly – and it’s not yours nor anyone’s place to pry about it or judge him for whether he follows you beyond death’s gate. out of habit you reach over to pat his shoulder, only to remember at the last second that marth doesn’t like being touched and retract your hand before you do so… going as far as to place it behind your back to stave off any future slip ups. whoops.

“you’re not a coward. nor are you weak for being able to stand up and say ‘hey, i’m not comfortable with this’. al gave everyone the chance to turn back for literally that exact reason. there’s nothing wrong with taking him up on the offer, and if anyone gives you trouble over it, you send ‘em my way and i’ll kick their ass.” 

   … maybe you shouldn’t be so rude in front of royalty. your cheeks tint slightly and you murmur an apology before pressing on. “i’ll pass the message along to alfonse that you’re gonna hold the fort here, okay? don’t worry about it– and thank you, actually. al’s been so gung-ho about charging into hel that i don’t think he’s actually put much thought into what we’re leaving behind… heck, i’m glad we’ll have someone reliable overseeing things while we’re away. the order’ll be in good hands!” 

[carisi-dreams]

episode thoughts | exile

SVU | 20x06

there are their stories...DUN DUN

*******************spoilers********************

aww Sonny & Peter hanging out

good brother Sonny Carisi :’) [although he does talk about his family in really begrudging terms a lot...]

okay what was the bit about the truck? I need to rewatch because I missed that bit of dialogue

whoops Sonny with the foot-in-mouth syndrome again :/

poor Peter. but homeboy should have taken that burger offer. my sweet Sonny trying to get Peter to look after himself a little :’)

ew men

“I know you’re old, but you’d only have to climb two flights.” damn, girl. in what universe is this man old?!?

“I’m just using you...I don’t know...to forget.” Peter :/

YES SONNY ON THE SCENE IN CHARGE HEY-O

is Sonny in the same suit? what did he just say? I feel like I miss so much when I watch on television.

they are committed to this ‘Olivia gets a trainer storyline’, I see. I’m not complaining, though, since continuity is not usually the SVU writers’ strong point, tbh

Sonny’s hair is looking super shiny

“detective Dominick Carisi”...Olivia, please call my man ‘Sonny’, for heaven’s sake!

“you heard me say I’m a cop, right?” lmao, Fin

[edibles will snatch your soul looool]

Fin taking edibles haha, but also #me

okay I still think this scene is...weird...to have a male detective drive a female sexual assault victim home alone??? Nick Amaro could never even look at this girl without someone trying to get him fired. but let me not start on that ‘Nick was treated poorly because he’s conventionally attractive and cares about victims’ soap box :/

“happy to recommend a therapist” um Sonny, if you have the number, I’mma need you to call and see one for yourself!

wow he’s so beautiful jeeez luh-weeeeez I can’t wait to screenshot this scene later

Sonny & Fin partnered up again-yeeeeees

oof hel-lo Sonny bending over the desk *eye emoji*

“if you don’t mind, stand your ass up and turn around” they really give Fin the best one liners, huh

they really need at least one other detective on the squad

the lighting in the interrogation room is so weird

“c’mon, who lies about pancakes.” Sonny lmaoooo baby

“oh hello no” not Fin’s shoes!!!

yo the old man with the cane! he needs to join the squad ahaaaa

[that staircase is giving me titanic!au vibes]

WHEW THIS OUTFIT ON SONNY IS THE TRUTH(TM)

Peter poppin’ off eyyyy. this one is hitting a little too close for him, huh. he needs a break

Peter needs to take more than a breath, Olivia

okay what is going on with Grace/Sophie

“you catch ‘em, I cook ‘em” damn Peter is really in a rough place 

Olivia was in a sorority!? Phi Delta okay giiiirl

[waiting until college to have sex does not make you a late bloomer btw]

Billy is a thing of the past because Olivia is married to Alex thanks for coming to my TED talk

that kinda looked like Columbia’s campus

this man hasn’t cleaned his couch cushions in 3 years??? at least a little spot cleaner? that stain is bright af

of course the guy’s dead, there are only 10 minutes left in this episode

no one is alarmed that this girl just upended a table in Olivia’s office

okay where is the psychiatrist now because we need something better than thrown mug

“if he weren’t already dead, I’d kill that guy” go off Sonny

IF IT’S GENIUS CALL HIM SONNY

[these episodes are so heavy handed in the writing. not necessarily bad, but just...lacking finesse & control & subtlety, imo]

[bruvebanner]

Can you imagine what would happen if someone tried to hurt Bruce when Thor is around

BOOOOOOYYYYY Thor, first of all, would WHOOP THEIR ASSES, but also he’d be like, “my friend I’m giving you the easiest way out, my small friend here can and will send you to the deepest pits of Hel if he got his hands on you, so take my fists as a BLESSING” and then kicks them into the sun.

[therealeagal]

Thor: Ragnarok

Marvel’s latest entry to the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

So apparently, Hel (who is actually Loki’s daughter in the comics and the original myths but is unrelated in the movie) was this big evil chick who was going to destroy the world and junk and stuff but then Odin sealed her away or something.

Then Odin bit the big one and Hel got out. Now she’s going after Asgard and then Thor tries to fight her and gets his ass whooped and his hammer destroyed and then somehow ends up on another planet where he gets to fight The Incredible Hulk who is also on the other planet for some contrived reason or other and he’s all “Yeah!” because he’s excited to see Hulk and fight him or something.

I assume they will break out together and then go fight Hel and beat her or whatever.

This is what I know based on the trailers.

I’ll unfortunately be missing the movie as I LOATHE Hulk with a passion.

[dark-unimaginably-stupid-kids]

Not second person! You know, pretty much nothing but dialogue here. It gets progressively worse Idk.

Born because I remembered a conversation I had with Tiana about Collin and Angel being “the lust couple” “Cause honestly what could they possibly like about each other.” And I didn’t have the time or the energy to fight her on it then but decided that I had the energy to write about it now. Particularly because I appear to be doing most of my venting through them. Which is super funny because I ended up making it a “canon couples” thing and WHOOPS Still haven’t made it to Collin and Angel.

So, with out further ado.

“Why do you even like [them]?” -Sans Bright eyes and Blondie

Marci and Grim.

“He was spoiled, and selfish, but he was always kind to me. He was beautiful and gifted and charming. He always had a witty retort and was full of surprises. I enjoyed the challenge.”

“She was loyal. Helpful. Brilliant. And sneaky. She was the best partner in crime, such a naturally good hearted person that no one ever saw her coming.”

Kale and Vincent.

“He’s my best friend. When we first met he was so much stronger than me and he taught me to be strong. He made me fight and he knew I was worth it; he didn’t have to tell me I was worth it to him he just showed me that I’d always been. And besides… he’s my pain in the ass.”

“He’s cute.”

--And?

“…He cooks?”

--Vince.

“He’s the kindest creature I’ve ever met. I swear his heart is made of sunshine and diamonds and he makes me feel warmer than I ever did while I was alive and I need to protect him—I need to protect him from everything that would ever—… I need to protect him.”

Aphrodite and Lucas

“He… terrified me. But he protected me. Always. And before it all went to hell we were friends. He was easy to talk to, comforting, he was so attentive he committed every word I said to memory. It wasn’t just because I was pretty he liked me for me. And he just tries so hard. Even starting over, he’s so patient with me. He doesn’t push.”

“She’s absolutely adorable. She loves so deeply and she’s so funny and surprisingly quirky. She eats like a monster when she thinks no one is looking and she writes herself notes as reminders but she still forgets. She’s smart but she’s ditzy and it’s just the most endearing thing—Ugh gods above she just freaking sparkles.”

“Oh my god Lucas, can you—Can you not?”

“Sweetie… No, I cannot.”

Hel and Lucifer

“She cheats at cards.”

“I absolutely do not.”

“She cheats at cards and she lies.”

“Lucifer! This is why you like me!”

“This is why I like you.”

“I’m… confused?”

“You were playing cards with your sister, you won—because you were cheating, clearly—and your sister being a sore loser started shouting and caught my attention and that was the first time I saw you. Had you not been cheating I’d have never spotted you. And thus I like you because you cheat at cards.”

“Well I’m pretty sure that’s not what they meant…”

“I like everything about you. I like that you’re a spoiled bratty princess who does what she wants. I like that you’re so unbelievably beautiful I can make an actual mess of you and you can still make the world stop to stare at you. You are sweet and sensible and this giant raging bitch all at once-- it’s really quite astounding. Helen, dearest, I can sit here and give you a list of everything I love about you but we just simply haven’t the time. You are my best friend. Is that okay?”

“…Well… I care for you because… Well you certainly don’t lack for charm. And you’re softer than you let others think. And your voice is like heaven and you’re so funny and—god how do you remember that? I didn’t remember that. I—I just… Weren’t you sitting with Salem and we just—”

“Helen, love, I think you’re missing the point now.”

“No I—I could have sworn we met over lunch, Diana ran up to Salem to get information on Laufey and you were there and you didn’t—”

“That was the second time we met. The first time was two days prior, you and Diana were on the stage, you were wearing the short purple dress and the red barrette which I have not seen again to this day mind you I occasionally think I made it up but I’m sure I didn’t—

“It was Dianas…She said I wasn’t allowed to wear it anymore until I let her win at cards again…”

“…And she was shouting and I looked over and I saw you and I walked into a pillar.”

“You walked into a pillar?”

“Yes.”

“—Oh my god you had that funny little bruise right on your head I thought—I didn’t—”

“Clearly.”

“Lucifer.”

“Yes?”

“…I think I love you a little bit more now.”

“Would you like to discuss other such instances I was struck dumb by you because there are others.”

“I- I think this is good.”

“Okay. You let me know though. Cause I’ve got them.”

“I love you.”

“Yes, I know I am blessed.”

Rain and Logan

“My lady is a boss. Do I need any more reasons?”

“She’s trying to find concrete evidence for us to be together in the story, if she doesn’t find it we won’t be canon anymore.”

“My lady is witty and strong and the most amazing individual. She gets shit done, she doesn’t take garbage from anyone, myself included and I am so used to getting what I want her bashing my head in for every little thing is incredibly refreshing. She’s this beautiful storm of a person and I count my blessings every day that she finally let me buy her that movie ticket all those years ago. Even though she sat on the other side of the theatre.”

“I still talked to you about it later.”

“That you did.

“Also have I mentioned she’s actually lightning in bed?”

“You can sleep on the couch.”

“Because she is. Actual lightning. Now Honey tell them what you love about me yeah?”

“Nah, I don’t love you.”

“She’s kidding. Of course she’s kidding. Tell the author that you love me Paige.”

“I tolerate you. Slightly more than most people. You’re cute. And you’re useful. And sometimes you’re funny.”

“Oh Paige, I feel the love.”

“And you won’t from the couch.”

“I saved your bat Paige.”

“…FINE. I love you a little bit. You’re still sleeping on the couch.”

Luneth and Angela

“You know what it’s like to hold fire in your hands? Like an actual star. This beautiful, life giving thing—Angela is an actual physical star. I honestly have no idea how this happened.”

“He’s fun to tease. He’s talented he’s cute—he’s not like all the other guys who try to “get to know me” you know? Probably cause I opened by being a giant bitch to him but you know, he could have taken that poorly and he didn’t. Instead he just kept trying to be this nice sweet genuine guy and you know—he earned my trust. He’s been warm and easy to talk to and safe… I am a fireball I know I can be a lot to handle; most guys are too damn scared to talk to me. But Luneth? He treated me like a person.”

“Well you are a person. How do people treat you like you’re not a person? Who’s been treating you like you’re not a person, love? who do I have to fight??”

“No one Luneth, it’s not on purpose I promise.”

“Look, my princess is brash and violent and loud but she is loving and real and life with her is an adventure without the mortal peril (which we’re always in anyway but gods it is so much nicer without the mortal peril.) and no I’m sorry if someone is making her feel like anything less I’m gonna fight them so tell me.”