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jazy3 · 6 years ago

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Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 15X23

I really loved this episode! It was fast paced, the storylines were interesting, and we got to see Meredith be a badass again! More of this please! It actually makes me excited for next week’s episode and the finale! I haven’t been excited to watch Grey’s in a while so this is awesome!

We open with a scene of Zola, Bailey, and Ellis eating breakfast while Meredith packs their lunches and Amelia chats with her. The kids are so cute! I love that we’re seeing them more this season! After Amelia makes a comment about DeLuca Zola clues in and starts teasing them about having boyfriends. Zola always knows what’s up! Also, Zola has on a Pom Pom unicorn necklace! Which is super cute and adorable and I totally want one! Based on this conversation we find out that apparently Meredith and Amelia had the ‘this is who I’m dating now’ conversation and we didn’t get to see it. Which is a total and complete rip off!

Maggie comes in. She’s freaking out because Jackson asked her to move in with him and she’s deflecting that onto Amelia and Meredith. Jeez. There’s an adorable conversation where Amelia says that Meredith looks happy and they talk about how weird that is. Cut to the hospital, Amelia, Link, and a still depressed Jo are talking at the coffee stand. Owen walks up with Leo and when he figures out that Amelia and Link are a couple, he is a huge asshole to her like always. I hate him! Can they please write him off? For the love of toast?

Maggie freaks out when she sees Jackson at work because she clearly doesn’t want to move in with him. Take a hint Jackson. Also don’t spring big decisions like that on the person you’re dating. Especially a control freak like Maggie. Over at the Denny Duquette Memorial Clinic DeLuca and Alex treat a little girl named Gabby. She’s in pain and needs treatment because she’s one of the many kids who have been kept in cages by Immigration under the Trump administration. I can’t believe I just had to write that sentence. What kind of world do we live in when our neighbours are putting kids in literal cages and separating families? This whole thing is sick. Her loving father can’t afford the treatment she needs, but clearly wants her to get better so the doctors have to get creative.

Meanwhile Teddy and Owen receive an incoming trauma. It’s Schmitt with Chief Ripley of Station 19! I like how Schmitt is improving as a doctor. He’s really growing on me this season. Maggie’s been paged because Ripley’s having heart problems. The Station 19 crew come to see him. Schmitt has some great lines in the exam room and Owen gets a pretty good zinger in on Warren about people dating their Chiefs. Tom comes in to the ER and makes Teddy laugh. I like them together! And Teddy’s due in three weeks! Finally! It feels like she’s been pregnant forever!

He asks to stay for the birth. Teddy says yes. Owen walks up and Tom pokes him and is his usual self. I love him! Schmitt comes to see Nico and tries to talk to him. Nico is still frosty and acting like a jerk. Ripley’s getting a CT scan. Owen and Amelia talk in the scan room. Owen tries to talk to Amelia about Link and calls their relationship a secret. She calls him on his crap like the badass she is! Telling him he doesn’t get to ask her about that kind of thing anymore. He tells her she’s overacting like the gaslighting a*hole he is. God I hate him. She tells him he doesn’t get to say things like that either. He keeps pushing, but Amelia stands strong and stays firm. He doesn’t get to have an opinion on this and he needs to shut up and stop talking. Yes! Amelia! You go! Owen needs to screw off and leave and never come back.

Jo is building Legos with Gus, Alex’s autistic patient with the rare blood. A nurse tells Jo there’s a phone call for her. The caller is looking for Alex. It’s about the rare blood they need. A hospital in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada has a patient who can help. She goes to find Alex. Side note: I love that they are mentioning Canada more the last two seasons! Although it would be great if they would include the city, province/territory, and country as that’s how it’s said in real life. Meanwhile Meredith is consulting’s on Gabby’s case. We find out that Gabby is Ellis’ age as Meredith makes small talk. She also might need surgery.

Jo runs into Gus’ Mom on the way to tell Alex. In her excitement she tells her they’ve found a donor. This will come back to bite her in the ass later. Meanwhile we find out that Ripley needs open heart surgery. He wants to go see Vic first. That’s not possible given his condition. He’s not happy about it. He orders the firefighters out. Maggie doesn’t buy his tough guy act for a second. They have some great banter.

Tom and Teddy talk some more about houses in the scan room. I love Tom’s line, “Okay so something more Germanic.” He loves her so much! Gabby is getting a CT scan. Alex and Meredith talk in the scan room about her situation and missing one’s kids. DeLuca comes in and tells them her Dad doesn’t qualify for the state insurance because he makes too much money. Cleaning offices. This is getting out of control.

They find out that Gabby does in fact need surgery. Meanwhile Jo’s on the phone with the hospital in Winnipeg. She finds out the hospital made a mistake. They think Gus is the donor and not the other way around. Maggie treats Ripley some more and they banter about their relationship problems. For some reason when talking about her housing situation Maggie acts like living in Meredith’s heritage home with her, Amelia, and her nieces and nephew who she adores is horrible compared to Jackson’s penthouse apartment. That sounds awesome to me!

Meanwhile Gabby’s father is trying to figure out what to do because he can’t afford her treatment and doesn’t qualify for insurance. Meredith tells him that they’ll take care of it. I love her! Alex tells DeLuca to go prep the patient. As Alex and Meredith walk away Alex turns to her and goes, “You don’t have a plan do you?” I love Alex! I love him and Meredith’s friendship! Jo comes to tell Gus’ Mom the news and overhears her telling her husband on the phone about how great everything is. Jo leaves heartbroken. She’s standing in a hallway when Warren walks by and sees that she’s upset. He tries to talk to her. She refuses and instead runs down the hallway crying. She bumps into Webber who somehow fails to notice this and tells at her to slow down. What a jerk!

Meredith, Alex, and DeLuca prepare to operate on Gabby. Webber walks in concerned about Ellis. We find out Meredith put her name on the insurance forms instead of Gabby’s when DeLuca rats her out. What a jerk! I hate him. Webber’s pissed, but Meredith’s not backing down. There’s no way in hell she’s shipping Gabby off to a county hospital. The system has failed Gabby and her Dad, but Meredith’s not about to. She tells Webber that she’s going to operate and that, “If you’d like to have me arrested when I’m done that’s your call.” Spoken like a true badass! Also, Meredith is wearing her pinky purple scrub cap with the dotted flowers on it today!

Jo goes to Teddy about her mistake. She hopes Teddy can use her military connections to get the blood they need. Teddy tells her everyone in this hospital has called in a favour. The blood is so rare it can’t be found and that’s the problem. Jo starts hyperventilating and Teddy tries to help her and figure out what’s really going on. She refuses and leaves. I like that they are building something here.

Meanwhile Amelia is sitting at a nurses station waiting to hear news about her quadriplegic patient. Owen comes over to talk to her. He wants to talk about the way he acted before about Link. He tells her, “I told you a while back that you were incapable of love, but I’ve been doing some therapy and I’m realizing that I think that it was me that I was talking about not you. And I’m sorry I said that. It’s not true. It’s the opposite of true.” To which Amelia replies, “Thank you.” I’m glad Owen is finally apologizing but that still doesn’t change his years of abuse and violence against women. He tells her Leo misses her and he’d love it if she busted him out of daycare and spent some more time with him. She says she’d love to.

Meanwhile Maggie and Ripley are still bantering. This time about the proposal milk story! They give each other advice. We cut to Gabby’s surgery. They find out they got to her just in time. Whew! They also find out that she has cancer and will need years of treatment. Poor Gabby! DeLuca continues to be an ass and gets on Alex and Meredith’s nerves. Webber walks up to the intercom tells them that he wants to see them after they’re done. DeLuca scrambles to say he had nothing to do with it like an asshole. Webber clarifies that he only wants to talk to Meredith. Seriously why would you spend your whole day intentionally pissing off your girlfriend and her best friend in favour of your boss? He’s such an idiot. Boy bye!

Meanwhile Ben is talking to Bailey about how he’s worried about Jo. Teddy comes in and she also wants to talk to Bailey about her concerns about Jo. We cut to Jo telling Gus’ Mom about the mistake. His Mom is understandably upset then angry. They both begin to cry. His Mom then apologizes and says she was unfair and unkind. Every child deserves parents as wonderful as Gus’! They are kind and they truly love him for who he is. Jo begins crying harder. Gus’ Mom hugs her but slowly realizes something else is wrong. Alex and Bailey arrive to try and help. Alex leads Jo away and Bailey goes to help Gus’ Mom.

Schmitt tries to help Nico some more but Link steps in and tells him to give him space. Webber is yelling at Meredith in his office about the insurance fraud. He’s mad because as part of his AA program he is committed to rigorous honesty. Having to deal with this puts his sobriety in danger and that’s why he’s so pissed. She asks him what he plans to do. He doesn’t know. He says the only thing to do is make Gabby sicker on paper. If she’s in the hospital for 30 days a new state policy automatically kicks in. Why didn’t he just tell her that before they performed the surgery? Meredith is confused because Richard wants her to lie more. Richard says he’s doing it for Gabby and her dad not for Meredith.

Jo is crying on Ben’s shoulder. Alex is yelling in Bailey’s office that he doesn’t know what to do to help Jo. Side note: I love Bailey’s necklace! The necklace game in this episode was on point! Meredith talks to Gabby’s dad about her treatment while DeLuca looks on disapprovingly like a jerk. This causes her to stop smiling. Maggie comes to talk to Jackson and says yes to moving in with him and explains why she didn’t say yes before. Maggie has a great one liner about rom coms! He asks her to come camping with him and says he’ll pro and con with her if she’ll come camping with him. Then Ripley’s labs are back. They are not good.

Amelia’s hanging out with Leo in the Attending’s Lounge. It’s very cute. Link walks in to see if she wants to grab food, but sees she’s already got plans. He talks to Leo and it’s so adorable! He’s really great with kids! I love them together! It’s nice seeing Amelia happy with someone more her speed that’s fun like here! Tom pages Teddy to the scan room. He shows her images of her dream home. He went and found it for her! My heart! He’s rented her an apartment. She loves it! Owen goes to see his therapist. He tells him the treatments are working. He feels clearer and he knows what he wants. He wants to continue the treatments because he wants to feel perfectly clear when he tells her that he loves her.

It’s unclear who he’s talking about. My money’s on Teddy. But it could be Amelia. Or even Cristina or some woman we’ve never seen before. My friend Amy whose not on Tumblr, theorized that they could pull a 180 on us and he could be referring to a family member and he could want to tell them he loves them before he makes a big life change like re-enlisting or something like that. Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past them. Some people Twitter users pointed out that this scenario seems unlikely because of Leo and Teddy’s baby, but having him declare his love to one of the women he’s already been with and said that too seems too simplistic for Grey’s. There’s also not a lot of drama there. I hope if it’s Teddy, Amelia, Cristina, or some other woman they tell him to go duck himself! Because that is what he deserves!

DeLuca’s alone in a patient room at the clinic. Meredith comes to talk to him. She tells him she made a call today and she knows he has a problem with it, but she would do it again. What a Badass! Meredith tells him she cannot and will not apologize for it and she’s not going to change. DeLuca tells her that’s not the problem. DeLuca says he spent the whole day thinking about how Gabby’s situation could have been his if he was born in Honduras instead of Italy. That doesn’t fit his behaviour at all but okay. He tells her he’s in awe of what she did today. He says he was afraid if he opened his mouth the only thing that would come out is ‘I love you’. At which point he actually says it and tells her he loves her. Oh boy.

They’ve only been dating for a few months and already he’s decided she’s the love of his life and he loves her. Meredith is having none of that! She stares at him blankly. Then says, ‘Oh.’ Stutters then says, ‘Well okay. Glad we cleared that up.’ Nods then leaves! Haha! Her reaction cracked me up. What an idiot! Welcome back Meredith! I was wondering if this was going to come up at some point.

DeLuca’s been head over heels since the beginning and everyone’s always talking about how he loves her, but never the other way around. DeLuca’s infatuated and convinced himself he’s in love with her. Meredith just sees him as a hot date that’s fun to fool around with. She’s not in love with him. He’s not going to live with her. She’s not marrying this guy. He’s not going to be a step dad to her kids. The only one that thinks that is him. He just got a rude awakening! I hope this is the end and he leaves to do his Fellowship somewhere else next season.

This kind of thing is all relative too. Teddy and Tom have been dating for a similar period of time, but they’re much more serious. It’s all about context. Tom started dating her knowing she was pregnant. They’ve both been married before. They’ve both lost people. Teddy’s lost her husband and Tom’s lost his son and had his marriage collapse as a result. The difference is that Tom shows his love for Teddy instead of saying it. He makes her laugh, buys her things that make her happy or make her life easier, she needs a nice place for her and her baby to live so he goes out of his way to find one for her. He loves and supports her unconditionally and that’s what true love really is. He tells Owen he loves Teddy to get him to back off and stop making Teddy miserable and causing her even more pain. He doesn’t have to tell Teddy, she already knows and vice versa.

You can see a similar situation with Amelia and Link. They are newly dating and so they aren’t there yet, but they are compatible and happy and having a good time. They don’t need to have the ‘this is what you mean to me’ conversation because they show their love, they don’t say it. If you have to say it this early it’s probably doomed or one sided. That’s the problem with big sweeping declarations. They look cool, but they only work if the other person is mutually into it. If not then it falls flat. Like with Meredith and DeLuca. He’s declared his love for her and she does not feel the same way. Which if he was paying attention and wasn’t so selfish and self absorbed he would have picked up on. But he doesn’t and he didn’t because everything is all about him. He assumes Meredith feels the same way or will automatically reciprocate or be wooed by his declaration.

He doesn’t know Meredith at all. It took her a long time to even admit to herself that she loved Derek and wanted to be with him because of everything that had happened. For her declaring that she loves someone and meaning it is a huge deal. It’s not something she takes lightly and it’s not a quick process for her. Some Twitter users also pointed out how alone DeLuca is. At this point he doesn’t have any real friends, he’s given up on Neuro as a specialty for no discernable reason, and is flopping around. He’s only real personal relationship outside of Meredith at this point is his sister Carina. That’s really pathetic. All of Meredith’s friends dislike or are ambivalent towards him. He’s put all of his eggs in one basket without checking if the basket felt the same way.

Meanwhile Maggie and Andy go to tell Ripley about his test results. They find out he’s gone! I watched the Station 19 follow up episode and it was a total letdown. I got super into Vic and Ripley in preparation for the crossover. I watched clips on YouTube and got all caught up and was super pumped. The episode was awful. They created stupid pointless drama with Ripley’s sister and Vic and then they made it seem like they were going to pull a hell Mary at the last second only to kill Ripley off in a super dumb way and have all of the build-up be for nothing.

A character’s death is only poignant if you build the character up over several seasons. Baiting viewers with Vic and Ripley’s romance and then killing him off in the show’s second season before the finale makes no sense. It’s a really cheap ploy that doesn’t come off well and is really bad writing. One of the issues with this too is that now Vic can’t date anyone for a least a season without it being super weird and forced. Grey’s has been battling with this, unsuccessfully, since Derek died. Why the writers looked at that and thought, “Yes, let’s dig ourselves into the same ridiculous hole no reason!” I have no idea.

Grey’s didn’t have a choice. Patrick Dempsey decided to the leave the show unexpectedly and killing him off was the only option that made sense since the alternative was having him leave his wife and children for some research assistant in Washington. That wasn’t the case with Ripley as the actor was still available which makes the whole thing pointless. It also means I have no reason to watch Station 19 now. Unfortunately, the promo for next week’s Grey’s Anatomy episode doesn’t show anything so there’s nothing for me to comment on sadly. Hopefully it’s good! We’ll just have to wait and see!

Until next time.

Au revoir!

#Grey's Anatomy #Meredith Grey #alex karev #station 19 #cross over #lucas ripley #reviews #Thoughts #critique #season 15 #15X23 #what i did for love #always ready #2X15

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autumnpawtribe · 6 years ago

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Complications Part 7

((TW: Abuse etc)) Vol finally got Tarja to calm down and sleep, many lullabies and a bottle later. He had a harder time getting the one he called his Flower and his young sister to be responsive. No smoking around Tarja, so he was digging in his pack looking for any remnants of his chocolate. He found a small peice, wrapped in foil and unfortunately, Kit'raka's recipe.

"Better than nothing...". He snapped the piece in half, putting one part under Janaret's tonuge. "When I get you back to calm, sweetheart, well figure out if your sister can tolerate this shit.". He put Aret's head on his shoulder, waiting for the candy to melt, peering through Xiao's eyes. "Xiao. Tonight we both serve Bwonsamdi."

Xiao sent back through the link. "I am more open to that than I expected. You said you wanted to watch... will the connection suffice or should I wait for you? His attention, however, remained on Pahre now. He barely understood her, his face scrunching up as he tried to scrounge words together. "Janaret... my Lok'dim... Bal'a... Wassa'dim." It seemed Xiao had been listening, using all of those terms before smiling gently at her. "I bring safe for you, I am safe." He extended his hand down to her, hoping to help her up. "Behind..." He pointed over at the two paralyzed Trolls, hoping she didn't panic. "P-... ah..." He grumbled, muttering 'Paralyzed' in Orcish a few times as he tried to think of how to translate. "Body... like stone, from... small sharp." He then reached over for the pouch to pull out a dart and the hollow tube, showing her the tool in hopes of her understanding what he meant.

Pahre stared at him almost blind and blank. She was as if waking up from a deep sleep, staring up at her home, mouth agape.

"Talking to her is gonna be useless. Do what you will. If you can get the hearts... I’ll give mouth presents?" He needed to cut the seriousness of the whole thing. Aret was snoring on his shoulder and Nielka was asleep in the corner. "I'll watch, you'll have to bring her here... Somehow. This is a loa damn mess."

Xiao just sighed and nodded at Vol's words. "You wanted... tusks too?" He asked a tad nervously, his edge fading a bit after healing Pahre. He needed more energy, pulling a small vial from his pouch and drinking it to make himself less exhausted. It wasn't a super potion like the other, this one just rejuvenating the Chi he already had rather than overpowering him with it. He knelt down in front of Jansevet first, carefully but forcefully jamming a finger DEEP into the side of the man's neck, almost near the back. It would hurt a fair bit, but not as much as the next. He went behind him and lined up his fingers, placing a sharp jab backed by a burst of Chi that would render Jansevet a quadriplegic. This wasn't a temporary nerve block through pressure points, he severed the spinal cord permanently. He reached for a small vial of herbs and shoved the man's immobile mouth. After a moment, he'd find he could move again, at least from the neck up. His other limbs loosened, no longer like stone, but instead he now just laid on the floor, limp and unable to feel or move a muscle. That was one plus, he couldn't feel anything below the neck anymore. "Vol I want you to translate for me. I am going to tell you what I want to say, you are going to repeat it back in Zandali. When he speaks, you repeat back to me what he says, no matter how cruel or vile. Now..." He paused, giving Vol his first line. "What do you have to say for yourself, Jansevet. You are a father, a husband, and a grandfather. You bring shame upon all three titles. You are not worthy of the ground you lay on. What do you have to say for the atrocities you have committed?"

"Yes, tusks and heart"

Vol watched and listened, translating slowly so that the words would work correctly, making the syllables flow as they should to be understood.

"I have no grandchildren, filthy Pandaren. My son is a worthless cunt and those three bitches are useless. That old bitch is dead, so who cares. I have done nothing wrong save let them all live.". Xiao would feel Vol'raka cringe before he spoke again. " Especially since that useless fuck is screwing a Darkspear man. He can rot with Rastakhan."

Xiao actually chuckled a little, moving to repeat the process of crippling Aket now and force feeding him the herbs to reverse the toxin so he could speak while being numb and permanently paralyzed from the neck down. "You are a fool... you are a grandfather twice over. Naddja did not crush her daughter's head with a rock. Those ashes were as false as the supremacy you think you hold. Her daughter is living with her real father... all three of them." He grinned now. "Also, your son is not screwing a Darkspear." He crouched, grinning down at Jansevet. "He is being screwed by a Darkspear..." He then reached to pull his mask off to reveal his face and thus his furry self and his race being made apparent. "AND and a Pandaren... and that is OUR daughter. Naddja, our daughter, and even her first born... the Frost Troll you despised so much... all of them are safe in our home, protected and far beyond your reach." He leaned down close, almost face to face with Jansevet as he spoke in a low and nearly dominant whisper. "Your grandchildren will grow up in a world where they not only do not know you exist... but in a world where you CEASE to exist... and they will be all the better for it." He stood up and looked over at Aket now. "You are just as pathetic. It is only fitting that nature deemed you too little of a man to be able to procreate. Ironic, is it not? How it was your infertility that lead to Naddja finding my Lok'dim... which lead to this very moment. Life can be funny that way sometimes. I suppose it has to make up somehow for putting monsters like you into existence. You are not a man for hitting your lover, your wife, your son, your daughter... you are not strong, big, important... it makes you WEAK." He then grinned, letting his tail flick almost tauntingly from side to side. "Otherwise how would a Pandaren not even five and a half feet tall manage to do away with both of you without even breaking a sweat."

Of course Vol had to translate all of this, but Xiao repeated it back as he said it, enunciating and putting emphasis where he needed. These men would know their place in this world before they left it, that much he would ensure.

"you know... That was oddly sexy.".

There was a smile on his face and in his voice as he added to it. "Tell them... " He gave the words, a hint of evil in his voice as he said it in Zandali. "Darkspear never die, and the Pandaren drove you back. The greatest among you shares our bed and will forever shown love, something you will never truly experience."

Xiao grinned at Vol's addition, eagerly mirroring it word for word with just as much edge to it. This was going to be delicious to watch unfold.

Jansevet tried to roar in anger and move desperately. Aket looked absolutely shamed, the attack on his very manhood and his secret being out to the world. Not even Jansevet knew of his inability to father children. The Old mon growled at the younger troll, spitting his words. "You buffoon, you told me your wife, that i had exiled for you, could not bear for you, It was YOU who could not get it up. I could have sent her to a better family, with more power than a mere priest!" His words were narcissistic in their tone and accusation. "You are just as much of a waste! As for your fucking children, I don't care if those half-breeds rot in hell! If I could I would kill them myself!"

Xiao seemed entirely unphased by the yelling, smiling down at him almost smugly. He crouched down, just inches out of his reach since all he could do was thrash his head around, Xiao making sure to stay out of tusk-reach too. "If you could? Hm, that is a shame... since it seems you are just as limp and useless as your son in law's manhood." He grinned widely now, looking over at Aket. "That is even funnier, hm? You cannot bear children, but the one you two deem to be worthless, under you because of who he loves... the one who loves other men, is going to be a father when you never can." He then looked down at Jansevet again, eyes narrowing. "Guess who is going to have his baby?" Oh man, Xiao was really letting them have it and Celestials he was enjoying it.

"I do not care if he does or not! Should castrate the lot of you, then feed you to the spiders! Quashi Nejho!" He devolved into a slew of Zandalari words, Vol having a hard time translating fast enough.

"Yeah.. short version. on that one... You are Dirty gutter whore, I am a dickless wonder and Aret is a cum guzzling slut who should have a spear shoved up his ass..."

"There is no way for you to give him a child, you piece of Jani shit! I wouldn't want my blood marred by animals as it is I disown that rotten meat that used to be my son!" The prelate was hissing and spitting his hatred.

Xiao just laughed now, shaking his head. "You cannot castrate anyone, you cannot even touch your own anymore." He then swayed his tail as he swayed his hips, the gesture almost playful, remaining entire indifferent to the words of hatred, knowing it'd piss him off even more. "There is this wonderful thing called magic. Your son? He is going to become an 'animal' for nine months, I am going to become a woman for the same... and he is going to have a child with me along with our other mate, the 'lesser' Darkspear who will also be an 'animal'. Your mighty Zandalari son has opted to forgo his own blood to have fuzzy little love children with the men he is happy with. How is that racial superiority treating you now, hm? The 'animal' has made you nothing more than a spitting writhing head who cannot even hold his own stool or urine." He then sniffed. "Come to think of it, I think you voided your bowels when I severed your spine. As you spew shit, you are literally stewing in your own. How incredibly fitting." He had such venom in that last sentence, his dominant aura really coming out now.

That head spit in Xiao's face before cursing at him again. Spiders began coming from the woodwork, but strangely ignoring the pandaren. All were tiny, smaller than Tarja's thumb, covering the prelate of Spiders. They began biting him, the old male unable to feel any of them until they began radiating to his face.

Aket began screaming, seeing what Jansevet could not feel. He was unable to move as the same began happening to him. Pahre, slowly coming back to herself, backed up into a corner, crying. Vol watched between the two through Xiao's eyes, sighing. He pet his mate as he was passed out in his lap, letting Xiao get a glimpse of him with a sleeping Nielka, Tarja, and Jararet. "I think I'm the animal in this family..."

Xiao merely wiped the spit off, though his attention was pulled away when the spiders came. "Uh oh, Vol I think I may have-... wait..." He trailed off when he saw what they were doing, brows furrowed now. "... What are they doing? Is he... killing himself and his son in law so I do not get to? I am confused..." He simply watched, letting them writhe and scream, unsure how to move forward.

"I dont speak spider... I serve the Loa of Graves.."

It was Pahre who spoke up, a bare whisper. "His Loa is displeased. He shows weakness. She does not like weakness." Vol translated for him, scowling. The woman kept going, hiding her face. "Torcali forgive me. I have failed."

"I gotta get Aret awake and come get her before you slice them up, Xiao love."

Xiao ignored the two men now, turning to Pahre. "You have not failed, Pahre..." He shook his head. "You are safe now. I am Janaret's Lok'dim, or... I will be eventually. He is my Ba'la, my Wassa'dim. He makes me happy and we make him happy. We know...we know what these two have been doing to you, your daughters... you do not deserve it and you cannot fail because of the actions of others. Your son is on his way, he has your other daughter with him at his old apartment. Nielka is safe, Naddja is safe at our home in Pandaria... your grand children, Pahre... they are safe. You will be too, I promise. I was not going to let you meet Bwonsamdi, not tonight. It is not your time." He spoke through the link now. "Vol, get him up and get him here fast, she needs to be with her family."

Xiao would only hear Vol trying to wake Aret up, it taking a bit more work than it should have with Kit's chocolate in his system. Once he got the younger prelate to his feet and mostly awake, he bundled up Tarja in her sling and wandered out with them both. the girl was asleep in a corner, locked safely in the apartment. "Give us some time. I don't want them seeing Tarja... Understand?"

Aket was screaming louder as tiny spiders moved into the orifices of his face and no matter how much he shook his head, he could not rid himself of them. Jansevet was shaking in anger, his body unmoving, but his tucks scratching on the floor and teeth chattering. "Shut up you cunt! Torcali will not help you! No one can help you! Mother of sluts!"

Pahre turned to look at the pandaren, sniffing him. "You know my son..." Her brain was starting to figure it out.

Xiao ignored the two men, smiling and nodding. "I more than know your son, Pahre. He is my love. I know your poor excuse for a husband knows your son is laying with a Darkspear... well he is also laying with a Pandaren. All three of us are a family. I know it is not traditional, but we love him and he loves us. We keep him safe and happy. The man Naddja was pregnant with... it was not Aket, it was my mate, the Darkspear. I will not go into the details how it happened, but that child is not dead. Those ashes were not hears. Your grandchild is alive... and she is our daughter. Naddja's first child lives as well. Your entire family is safe, Pahre. You are, too. Your son is on his way now, we will take you to safety. You do not need to see what happens next, what these two deserve." He said with a look back toward the two writhing men, letting the spiders do his work for him.

"Naddja's baby?" That woke her up, letting the blue eyes that her children had inherited look up into the emerald ones of her son's lover. She became distracted as her son came in, accompanied by his taller mate and a little baby who was making happy little noises and wiggling. It was a stark difference between an infant's giggles and the priest's screams.

"Muuka..." Aret moved to sit next to his mother as she cried, holding her and tending to the hysterical woman. Vol stood above the pandaren, squatting down to kiss him on the nose, just to see the look of disgust on the old man's face, then the rage as he figured out that there was a child in the Darkspear's arms.

"Tarja, dis be ja Chaadoi, Grandfathah. He gonna not exist in about.. fifteen minutes ef Ba an Papa got anytin ta say bout et."

Xiao smiled up at Vol as he came in, leaning in to kiss him gently. "I thought we did not want them seeing her?" He asked in Orcish now, knowing they couldn't speak it. He looked to Aret and moved beside him, nuzzling the man gently on the cheek and murmuring in Pandaren. "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help? I tried telling your mother she would be safe, be with her family, her grandchildren, but it seems to be too much for her to process all at once..."

"No choice" the words were in broken pandaren before he stuck to the link. *"Let them see a tiny beautiful girl before they die. Let them suffer, one from never knowing his grandchildren, the other the child he wanted to torture to death."

Aret turned tired and crying eyes to Xiao and Vol, whining, but not freaking out. "We can't leave them here... I can't leave them alone."

"Ok with a few more in the house until that guest house is built, Xiao Chun?"

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curly-q-reviews · 6 years ago

Photo

ROAD TO THE OSCAR MAYER WIENER AWARDS 2K19

The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, 2018 (dir. Joel Coen, Ethan Coen)

Nominated for: Best Original Song, Best Costume Design, Best Adapted Screenplay

SPOILER ALERT THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD ME HEARTIES BE YE WARNED

wowee what a cool film!! i went into this not knowing much about it except it was directed by the Coen brothers (directors of Fargo and The Big Lebowski) which set real high expectations for me. these guys are real masters of storytelling and what immediately come to mind when i think of movies that know how to effectively use dark humor. i also love the kinds of stories they tell in general, how they take subjects and settings that seem kinda mundane and just give them this little extra spark.

so is this newest film just as good as their other work??? well id say yeah for sure!!! it reminds me a lot of a film they did shortly after The Big Lebowski called O Brother, Where Art Thou?, because theyre both period pieces AND because they both feature a myriad of eclectic and interesting characters. the one thing that makes The Ballad of Buster Scruggs really stand out from their other films however is the fact that this is actually an anthology made up of six different stories, all set during the same time period in The Wild West. its also worth mentioning that this movie was made to premiere on Netflix, which is something ive started to see more and more as the streaming platform becomes the new go-to source of media content. its very exciting to see such prolific directors go the Netflix route and have great success with it, because it means that the platform really is capable of creating high-quality movies and TV shows and working with big-name talent. im sure the big hollywood production companies are all quaking in their lil booties cause this means big BIG changes are on the horizon

ok so ive reviewed anthology series before, notably Black Mirror, and with those reviews i ranked the short stories in order of least to most favorite. so i guess in this case ill do the same, although its hard to really rank these cause i truly enjoyed all of them in different ways. there was one however that didnt really tickle my fancy much, which was “Near Algodones”. this one stars james franco as a bank robber who seems to have met his match in a fiery (probably crazy) bank teller. he gets caught and hung from a tree by the town’s sheriff, but nearly manages to escape death when a Native American tribe swoops in and kills the sheriff and his crew. james franco is saved by a cattle driver, only to be caught again by the next town’s sheriff for allegedly trying to hawk the cattle (which was not the case at all). right before they kick the chair out from under him at the hanging, he sees a beautiful woman in blue, who at first smiles at him but then looks unnerved as he stares back at her.

i think with this one the ending really didnt do much for me, i kinda didnt get it. i did understand the whole irony behind surviving punishment for a crime he DID commit but getting hanged for a crime he never committed, and the bank teller was pretty hilarious, but everything else about the segment was just ok. james franco didnt really blow me away (he never really does but thats besides the point), the rest of the performances were fine, and the story just kinda zipped on through. maybe ill give this one another watch to see if the ending makes any more sense to me, or if theres any sense to be made from it at all

next up for me would be “The Gal Who Got Rattled”, and this segment i have mixed feelings over. its about this brother and sister who set out on the Oregon trail so that the brother can get his sister to marry his business partner in Oregon. the sister seems like a kind of wishy-washy, subdued character who just kinda goes along with whatever her brother says without giving much of her own opinion. i gotta give credit to zoe kazan (who starred in The Big Sick) cause she does a great job with this character, totally spot-on performance. ok so turns out the brother is a fucken HORRIBLE businessman who screws up all his business deals all the time, and he tragically dies like two days into being on the oregon trail. he has this annoying-ass dog that barks all the time and everyone else on the caravan is sick of it, so when the brother dies the sister just lets one of the trail leaders put it down. turns out the sister like did not like her brother at all but was always too afraid to say anything. now getting back to the bad businessman thing, apparently he had promised the helper boy that is helping move their covered wagon a large sum of money, half of it halfway through the journey and the rest when they get to oregon. problem is, the sister doesnt have the money, so it was either left in the brothers pocket when he was buried or there wasnt actually any money at all and he lied, y’know, like a bad businessman does. the trail leader who put the annoying dog down offers to help her, and the two start to get close. so now its like a pseudo love story thing. except it ends pretty tragically (the sister dies its a long story and pretty ironic just watch it if u wanna know)

so uuuhhhhh this one was long as shit, like a lot longer than the other segments when it didnt really need to be??? like it just kept going and going, and again the ending didnt really make up for how long it was. i really liked zoe kazan in this, but otherwise nothing to write home about.

number four on my list would have to go to “All Gold Canyon”, which basically just follows the story of a gold miner in the mountains trying to get that money honey. this segment is the simplest one out of the bunch, but i gotta say its absolutely gorgeous. what beautiful scenery and cinematography. it provides a nice contrast to our disheveled, run-down gold miner who is just tearing up the beautiful grassy fields trying to get to this gold. there seems to be a theme in this one of man’s relationship to nature, and how the gold miner does put in effort to respect it but still takes advantage of it for his own benefit. and i guess theres a broader theme of greed, or the ruthless and endless pursuit of wealth which can drive people to do crazy and desperate things. i definitely really enjoyed this one, especially the gold miner character played by tom waits. but otherwise it didnt stand out as much to me as the other segments im gonna talk about

SPEAKING OF WHICH heres number three!! “The Mortal Remains” is right up my alley, and has some more mythical elements to it than the other segments ive talked about so far. so we have a wagon full of passengers all going to this hotel for various reasons, and its a really diverse cast of characters: we have the older wife of a prolific religious lecturer, a rich Frenchman, a trapper, a foppish Englishman, and a cheery laid-back Irishman, the last two seeming to be companions of some sort. they all get on the topic of the true nature of mankind, and the three characters opposite of the strange pair all have something different to say. the trapper believes that all people are inherently the same, with the same basic needs. the older woman disagrees and insists that there are two kinds of people, upright and sinning. and then the Frenchman says that both of them are wrong, that human existence is much more complicated and nuanced than that; no one persons life is exactly the same as another’s. and then we have the Englishman and the Irishman, who turn out to be bounty hunters of some sort (is heavily alluded that they are grim reaper-type figures). they explain their method of completing their kills, and talk about how they enjoy watching their victims “try to make sense of it all” in their death throes. these two clearly have a much more cold and sinister idea of the nature of mankind, and the rest become very unsettled all the way to the hotel. no one else even dares to step out of the carriage while the bounty hunters drag their latest victim through the front entrance and up the stairs.

oh man this segment was great! i think the reason its third on my list is cause i really wish there was more to it, like if the Coen brothers spent more time on this one instead of “The Gal Who Got Rattled” it would be perfect. Jonjo O’Neill and Brendan Gleeson as the bounty hunters were so enthralling, and i loved watching them play off of each other. hell, i couldve had a whole movie featuring those two. and the screenwriting really shines in this segment too. this segment almost feels like a fable or something, which is really fitting for the time period. makes me wonder if they had based it off of an actual fable. but anyway yeah this ones awesome!

i had a hard time choosing between “The Mortal Remains” and this next segment for second place cause i liked them both equally, but in the end “Meal Ticket” gets #2 purely because of the utterly fantastic performance by Harry Melling, who plays a quadriplegic actor in a traveling show run by liam neesons character, an irish traveling entertainer. the story itself is really simple, we just see this disabled actor be carted from one town to the next, doing the same stage show which is basically just him reciting famous prose throughout the ages. meanwhile liam neeson is trying to get as much money as he can out of the audience members. he doesnt interact much with harry melling outside of feeding him and helping him piss and get dressed. u get the sense that he doesnt really see his disabled actor as an actual person, but more of an entertaining object or a pet. and this becomes even more apparent when the irishman gets some competition from another traveling entertainer who has a chicken that can do math. he sees this chicken getting more money than him, so he buys it off of the other guy and takes it with him. and finally, the poor limbless actor is literally and figuratively tossed aside for the next best thing.

man oh man what a great segment! harry melling blew me away with his performance, the fact that he was able to get such a nuanced range of emotion out of the few lines he was given (basically he had to recite the same shit over and over again) was so impressive to me. and his non-verbal communication was really solid too. liam neeson did really well in his role too. and again the story itself is really great, simple but effective and really gets the point across without having to beat the audience over the head with its message. OH YEAH ITS REAL GOOD LOVE IT

and finally we have my #1 pick, which i think the directors knew this was the best one out of the bunch too cause its the first segment as well as the title of the whole movie. “The Ballad of Buster Scruggs” has that signature Coen brothers wit and dark humor that i love, it plays off of typical Western movie tropes and is very tongue-in-cheek and i ate that shit up. tim blake nelson as the titular buster is just so fucken perfect for this role, he really shines in this and its kind of a shame that its one of the shorter segments cause it really is the best one and he knocks it out of the park. we got some great music in this segment too, which is where that Best Original Song nom comes in. this one also has some strong fable-y vibes to it, like this story could be amongst the likes of American folklore like Paul Bunyan and Johnny Appleseed. i wont get much into the plot of this one but i highly recommend watching it, even if you dont wanna see the rest of the segments.

the segments fit together pretty well overall, although the tone of each of them differs slightly the fact that the setting and time period are the same is enough to firmly knit all these stories together. its a really unique idea for a movie, and is so far the best attempt at an anthology movie that ive ever seen purely because the stories really all make sense together and play off of each other well. in other anthology movies ive seen like The ABC’s of Death the segments usually dont have much at all to do with each other, except that they all fall in the same genre. so overall id say give this a watch, especially if ur a Coen brothers fan, cause theres some real good stuff in here.

well thats all i got for now cowboys!! i watched Roma the other day and CRIED REAL HARD so get ready for me to kiss that movies ass in a review that should be done in the next few days. until then go uuhhhhhh lasso a cow or something. chew some tobaccy. fondle a barmaids titties. die of dysentery. y’know just old west things~

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hiddlestaan · 6 years ago

Text

Arms (Part 2)

Summary: Y/N has always always struggle with self perception and body image. She always tried to change the way she looked in order to gain approval, but that all changes when Loki comes into the picture. Struggling with his own fear of rejection and jotun form, Y/N and Loki find a home in each others arms.

Part 1

Warnings: Me Before You spoilers (oopsie daisies)

Inspiration: Arms by Christina Perri.

The next part will go deeper into both Loki’s and the readers insecurities, but this chapter is mostly fluff :)) enjoy!

In case you want to listen to the song while you read!

youtube

What in the world got into him? He was perfectly fine until I asked if there was something wrong. Was it something I said? Did?

I couldn’t help but feel guilty for the way Loki left. He just seemed so uneasy and uncomfortable when I addressed the silence between us. All these questions were floating in my head and I continued to wonder why Loki left like that. It all must have been to much for me, because I woke up to Bucky shaking me awake.

“Y/N?” whispered Bucky, while shaking my shoulders

“I’m awake, I’m awake!” I yelled out

“Woah, there doll. No need to yell” said Bucky

“I’m sorry. You took me by surprise. What time is it anyways?” I asked

“How long have you been sleeping?” questioned Bucky

“I don’t know. I was just watching Twilight” I said, turning towards the tv screen, “oh, did the movie end already?”

“Y/N, it’s eight in the morning. It’s Saturday” stated Bucky

“What? I slept on the couch!” I yelled

“Apparently” said an all too familiar voice

Loki walked into the living room area with a smug smile on his face. My eyes widened in surprise. He seemed a lot more calm and content since the last time he saw you.

“I shouldn’t have left you here all alone to watch the movie. Perhaps, I could have gotten you safely tucked into your bed had I not left” avowed Loki

“But you did leave” I stated

Bucky gave me a curious look before saying, “Well, I’m going to go make some breakfast. I’ll let you know when it’s ready, YN”

He leaned in giving me a light kiss on my forehead. I must admit, I was taken by surprise, but I didn’t reflect it in my facial expressions. I offered him a small smile before he retreated into the kitchen, leaving me alone with Loki.

“I see that you already have someone who cares for you” stated Loki. I was unsure whether he was asking me or stating it as a fact.

“Bucky? Yeah, he’s a really good friend of mine. He’s always looked out for me. So does Steve. Those two are some of my closest friends” I said

“Ah, so you’re just friends with the soldiers?” asked Loki

“Just friends” I answered

He nodded at my response. He opened his mouth in attempt of saying something, but he stopped himself before he could. I had to put an end to the silence, again.

“I better go help Bucky with breakfast”

“Wait, Y/N, I’m sorry for leaving so abruptly and rudely last night. It wasn’t my intention to make you feel bad. It had nothing to do with you, but all me” confessed Loki

“Do you want to talk about it?” I asked, hoping he would open up to me

“Perhaps at a later time, somewhere more private. For the meantime, I can help you and the soldier make breakfast” he mumbled

“The soldier has a name. It’s bucky” I giggled

“Bucky, soldier, mortal, all the same” joked Loki

Breakfast went on as usual, except for the longing stares on Loki’s part. I tried to eat my bananna pancakes without choking on it every time I would catch his gaze on me. I tried starting a casual conversation with Bucky, but I would continuously shift my gaze upon Loki, and Bucky noticed.

“Hey, so, uh Y/N are you going to want to come on that movie date with me and Steve? I mean you can bring someone along if you’d like” asked Bucky with a suggestive smile and eyes glancing over to where Loki was sitting.

I could literally feel myself turn a deep shade of red. I shook my head and glared at Bucky, warning him against any match making efforts. I was about to get up, but Loki interjected.

“Movies? I’ve never been” interjected Loki

“Really? No, yeah they’re a real great time. Good first date, if you ask me” added Bucky

I took Bucky’s bait and asked Loki if he wanted to come to the movies, and to my surprise he said yes. I wondered if he knew what a date was, because going to the movies was technically a date. He probably didn’t. I mean he would never go on a date with someone like me, or better yet someone who looks like me. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that I was overweight. You could obviously tell, but I tried to not let it get to me. It’s hard though, especially being surrounded by physically attractive people like the Avengers all the time. There were time where I wish I had a completely different body. A much more slimmer and prettier body, but I had to with that I had.

I was just about done getting ready when I heard a light knock on the door. I slowly approached the door while trying to put on a my left earring. I opened the door to find Loki holding a bouquet of sunflowers and a small box tied with ribbon. I have to admit seeing him all dressed up in that black suit made my jaw drop. Loki offered me the flowers with an awkward smile.

“I consulted the soldier about midgardian dating customs” he added when he noticed the shock in my eyes, “he told me that sunflowers were your favorite”

“That they are. They’re absolutely beautiful. Thank you, Loki”

“You’re very welcome” he said, “Oh, and I got you something else. I thought it should be worn by someone as stunningly beautiful like yourself”

He unwrapped a gorgeous emerald necklace with gold detailing. It was the most beautiful piece of jewelry I had ever seen. I didn’t mean for my eyes to get watery, but they did anyways.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” asked Loki, concern obvious in his voice

“I’m fine. I just… I’m not used to people calling me beautiful is all. I kind of always was the ‘other girl’ who no one paid attention to”

“Well, you have all my attention. If I’m going to be completely honest you’re the most beautiful creature in all the nine realms”

I smiled lightly at Loki’s compliment. It wasn’t always that I got compliments from someone as beautiful as Loki. It felt almost surreal to be going on a date with him. This was my first date ever. I mean, technically, I did go to a highschool dance with some guy but it meant nothing and it was years ago. I felt the nauseating feeling of butterflies in my stomach when he gently placed the necklace on my neck. The cool feeling of the necklace touching my neck made a shiver go down my spine, but I tried to play it off as best I could. He made me feel weak to my knees, I couldn’t deny it.

“There we are. Almost as beautiful as yourself” whispered Loki into my ear as he fastened the necklace around my neck.

“Thank you. It’s absolutely stunning”

“I brought it home from Asgard. It was my mother’s. I’m sure she would have loved to meet you. I can’t see who better to give it to than you. You remind me so much of her with your kind and understanding demeanor. She was the only one who ever understood and gave me a chance” murmured Loki. He had a genuine smile on his face, but his eyes were glossy. It was obvious how much his mother meant to him. You could tell by the manner in which he spoke of her.

“She sounds wonderful”

“Indeed she was”

“I’d like to hear more about your life on Asgard. You seem to have very fond memories of it”

“Not all of memories are near and dear to my heart, but if you’d like to hear more it would be my pleasure. It will have to wait for another time, however. We do have a movie to get to”

“Right. Okay, then lead the way”

Loki stepped to the side and allowed me to walk past him. When we both arrived to the living room we spotted Bucky and Steve sitting on the couch, waiting for our arrival.

“Finally! We were about to leave you two behind” chuckled Bucky

“I’m glad you could join us, Y/N. You too, Loki. Just promise you won’t try to take over the whole world again?” laughed Steve

“You have my word, soldier” said Loki

Both Steve and Bucky laughed at Loki’s inability to call them by their real names. They accepted the fact and led us out the door of the compound. When we arrived at the movie theaters there weren’t many people, which was a good thing. Bucky was an avenger now, but some people still acted hostile towards him, and I couldn’t imagine how they would act towards Loki. They both had come a long way from the menacing ‘villains’ the world made them out to be. Loki awkwardly shuffled out of the car and into the theater, away from peripheral view. It was evident that he was nervous to be around the people he once tried to rule. Hesitantly, I reached out to hold his hand. When he felt the warmth of my hand wrap around his cold one, he offered me a sweet smile.

“You’re okay” I whispered

He nodded and tightened his grip on my hand. Those damn butterflies came back when he smiled at me. I was weak for him, and I knew it. Everything about him entranced me. I wanted to know more about him, about his life, about his Asgardian heritage, his likes and dislikes, I wanted to know every thing there was to know about him.

We walked over to the concession stand to buy our tickets for Me Before You. Bucky and Steve promised that I would be able to pick a movie of my choosing for our outing, and I had been wanting to watch Me Before You for weeks now, so they agreed. They were willing to do anything for me, so long as I went out with them. I will admit, I do spend most of my time indoors, but Bucky and Steve always drag me on random adventures throughout the city to ‘loosen me up.’

“What is this movie about?” asked Loki

“Oh, it’s about a man who got in a terrible accident and unfortunately ended up a quadriplegic due to the damage on his body and he kind of loses all hope for his life. He tried to end his life, but his parents intervened. I don’t want to say so much as to spoil the movie, but he ends up falling in love with this girl who is unlike any other girl he’s ever met. She’s quirky, amiable, and funny. She allows him to see life in a different perspective, but we don’t know if that’ll be enough for him, thus the reason we’re watching” I went on

“Sounds very interesting. I’m rather excited to see what happens” he added

The movie was absolutely beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. Even with love in his life, it wasn’t enough to will him to live. I can’t imagine being in Lou’s situation and having the man you love willingly take his life away. A few tears managed to fall down my cheeks as Lou saw Will for the last time, especially when Perfect by Ed Sheeran began to play. That hit me right in the feels. It was heartbreaking to put in simple terms, but the love story was beautiful. We all walked out of the theater with glossy eyes, but none of them would admit that they cried during the movie.

“That was devastating” mumbled Loki

“Tell me about it” I added, wiping the tears away from my eyes

“Y/N, are you crying?” asked Steve

“Yeah, I am! That was heartbreaking, and don’t even act like it didn’t hit you. I could see it in your eyes. Your eyes are glossy, Steve Rogers!” I blurted

“Alright, alright, you caught me. A tear may have slipped” confessed Steve

“A tear may have slipped? I heard you sniffling throughout the entire movie” joked Bucky

“Oh, yeah? What about you? I saw you cry when Will asked Lou to tell him something good in that end scene” accused Steve

“Okay, enough with the tear shaming. It was a tear provoking movie” I said, “Anyways, Loki did you enjoy your first outing to the movies?”

“Yes, I very much enjoyed this date” answered Loki

“Date?” I whispered

“This is a date, is it not?” asked Loki

“Yeah, I suppose it is” I avowed

He smirked at me while snaking his hand into my mine. The immediate cool feeling of his hand on my warm flesh sent shivers down my spine.

“Holding hands, huh? You did good, Buck” whispered Steve to Bucky

“I did, didn’t I? Our girl finally has someone to call her own” whispered Bucky back.

The ride back to the compound was different. Loki still had his hand intertwined with mine. I was on cloud nine when I was with Loki. He made me feel alive in ways that I never thought I would experience. I was mesmerized by every single thing about him. I had only known him for a couple of days, but I was already so deeply invested in him. We walked into the compound, hand in hand, to find Thor and Tony waiting in the entrance of the living room. Tony leaned against the door frame with a stern look on his face, while Thor stood firmly next to him with his eyes casted down. I could tell from the looks on their faces that nothing good was going to come from this exchange. The smiles on our faces immediately diminished when Tony spoke up.

Taglist:

@tfwqueenidjit @fire-in-her-veinz @his-pretty-little-doll @lady-and-the-dixon @markusstraya

#Loki Laufeyson #loki odinson #loki #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki x reader #loki fluff #loki marvel #me before you

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warlockwriter · 6 years ago

Text

The Case of the Techno Witch

Fandom: The Agency (AU)/Warlock Case Files

Rating: Gen

Word Count: 1975

Summary: Strange multi-colored plant growing out of a computer? All in a day’s work for Dafydd Smith, Warlock.

A/N: This is both a crossover and a story with multiple OCs. My OCs. From my published series, hence the crossover. Blame @snips-snails-skittles for creating the below moodboard (used with permission) and giving me the idea of crossing Witch!Lex with my series. When I mentioned this in passing, he encouraged me to write it. So I did. Enjoy a little introduction to Dafydd, my warlock.

As always, many thanks to @ihaveallthesefeelsokay for the beta.

I was curled up on the couch in what was now our house, me having sublet my old apartment and moved in formally with Paul last week. Gyre and Gimble, my two ferrets, gamboled together back and forth over the living room floor. I hoped Paul wasn't going to mind their whirlwind play in his space.

Paul was giving me a foot rub. Have you ever had a foot rub from a vampire? Probably not, so let me make you jealous by letting you know exactly what you're missing. His hand are cool, a few degrees below body temperature, which feels fantastic after a long evening tracking down the minor demon who had been preying on the homeless population in D.C. We finally ran him to ground near the Air and Space Museum, which was fortunately closed at the time. Only a few people were around to watch Paul wrestle him to the ground and hold him while I did a quick exorcism. I was getting to be quite the expert at those. A couple of month ago we had dealt with a demon witch, and apparently she had let it be known that the nation's capital was a good hunting ground. We've been dealing with the aftermath ever since.

I'd convinced our stunned audience that we were practicing for a movie audition, and we'd hurried for home

Paul had just found the exact spot in my arch which hurt the most when my phone rang. I groaned, partially at his ministrations but mostly at the unhappy thought that someone had found another demon.

"It's Laura," Paul said, glancing over at my phone while not losing his rhythm on my feet.

I reached for the phone. Laura is an old friend of mine. She's a quadriplegic hacker who spends more time in the virtual world than the real one, for obvious reasons.

"Hey! What's up?" I asked as I took the call. I couldn’t help the involuntary groan that escaped me when Paul found another particularly sore spot,

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Laura asked.

"Just the most amazing foot rub you'd ever feel. Oops. You can't feel those, can you?"

Yeah, she and I have been friends long enough for me to get away with insensitive jokes like that.

"Very funny, Dafydd. I need you over here right now, so you'll just have to get your orgasmic foot rub later."

I could hear a mixture of exasperation, annoyance and maybe even a hint of fear in her voice. Paul stopped what he was doing to pay attention. Vampire hearing means he can listen to both sides of a phone conversation with ease.

"What happened? I asked, all joking out of my voice.

"I have a plant growing out of my computer!"

I blinked. "You have a what growing where?"

"You heard me. I have a plant growing out of my computer."

"Umm. Okay." What do you say to that anyway? "So call one of those lawn care companies? The ones who deal with weeds and stuff?"

"No. This is definitely your thing. The plant is purple and gold and kind of sparkly. And did I fail to get across that it is growing out of my fucking computer!"

I had to hold the phone away from my ear at that last bit.

"Yeah. I get it. We're on our way."

***

Paul made record time from Mt. Vernon Square to Laura's apartment in Crystal City. We skipped the elevator and dashed up the stairs. Well, Paul dashed. I kind of huffed and puffed. I am young and pretty fit, sure, but no human can keep up with a vampire.

Laura's door opened as soon as we approached. I tease her that she uses electronics the way I use magic. She always seems to like that.

However, there was no way I was teasing anyone when I walked into her living room. She hadn't been kidding. There was about six feet of purple and gold sparkly plant growing right out of her monitor. It hadn't broken anything. It was just growing out like it was designed to do that.

"Okay," I said. "That is weird, even for me."

Laura had rolled her chair as far from the computer as she could while still being in the same room with it. "What are you going to do about it?" Her eyes were flashing more in anger than in fear.

Paul moved over to take a closer look, all six-foot plus of him stalking around the computer table like a hunting panther. Did I fail to mention that his black slacks hugged his hips perfectly, and his white silk Oxford-style shirt made the image just perfect?

Why yes, I do admire my vampire boyfriend, even in the midst of danger. His ass is something else!

"Stop drooling over Paul, Dafydd, and do something about that thing!" Laura said, her tone vying between amusement and irritation.

Right. I allowed my sight to shift into aura sight, where I can read the energies which make up every living and most non-living things. I say most because technological things like computers don't have auras.

Well, usually don’t have auras. This one did. So did the plant. Not a crazy weird, looks like it's about to bite your head off aura, so not demonic. Which was a relief, considering. However, it did have the color of transformation magic about it. Which meant a warlock, or more likely witch—witches are stronger in transformation magic than warlocks—was responsible for this.

Okay, right. You probably have the wrong idea about witches and warlocks. We're just users of the magical energies that surround everything. Witches are female, and warlocks are what my kind calls male witches. So no deals with devils or other evil higher powers. I could go on for hours about how magic works, but you'll have to read the books about me which my chronicler has kindly penned.

"So, you’re right. It's magic. Probably a witch and one who has combined—" I paused, not really believing what I was about to say next.

"Combined what?" Paul asked.

"Well, combined earth magic with techno magic. Which I didn’t even know was a thing until now."

"Techno magic?" Laura asked, excitement in her voice. Yeah, she would fasten on that part.

"That's what it looks like. I mean, if you combined a hacker with a witch, this might be what you'd get." I walked around the computer desk, wanting to examine it from all sides.

As soon as I got to where I was facing the monitor screen, an image appeared, superimposed as if…well, by magic…on the blank screen. It was the face of a youngish man, maybe a few years older than me. He had brown hair verging on blond, striking amber eyes and…seriously? Long sideburns half-way down his cheeks and a soul patch? What decade was this guy even from?

"Dafydd Smith, I presume?" came a pleasant baritone voice through Laura's speakers,

"Uh, yeah. Who's asking? And what have you done to my friend's computer?"

"I'm Lex, and I understand you were looking to create a coven in the area. I was told that something dramatic was needed to attract your attention." The image waved a hand, encompassing the weird plant. "Does this do it?"

I couldn't help rolling my eyes at that. "Have you been talking to Caitlyn?" I asked.

Caitlyn is my apprentice, and she thought the best way to get my attention was to try to kill a ghoul friend of mine. And yes, I meant "ghoul" friend, not "girl" friend.

Lex's triumphant expression faltered a bit. "Uh, yes. Did I misunderstand?"

Paul had come around behind me. From the way his eyes were crinkled, I knew he was barely restraining himself from a good belly laugh. He does try to be polite, at least until he's been introduced.

I ignored Lex's question in favor of one of my own. I motioned to the plant. "What is this? And how did you do it?"

Laura had rolled her chair closer. "More important. Ask him if he can get rid of it without ruining my monitor. That thing cost major bucks."

I raised an eyebrow at Lex, whose expression was wilting rapidly. "What she asked."

The plant vanished, leaving the monitor apparently undamaged. Lex's image remained.

"That's better. Now to my question. How did you do it?"

He shrugged. "Combined earth witchcraft and techno magic. I'm a witch and a hacker."

I shook my head. "Unless I'm terribly mistaken, you're a warlock, not a witch."

Lex's jaw assumed a stubborn set. "I'm a witch, and you're being discriminatory. My mentor said I'd run into this."

Suddenly, I got it and groaned.

"What?" Paul and Laura asked.

"You were trained by Sam Johnston, weren't you?"

Lex nodded enthusiastically. "You've heard of him?"

I nodded, much less enthusiastically. "Yeah. He trained with my dad under my grandfather, who tried to get that whole 'witches can be male' idea out of Sam the entire time they were training. My dad took up the torch after he started leading his coven, and, to hear him tell it, Sam just up and left one day in disgust and refused to have anything to do with my family. So, if you're looking for your own coven, you may be looking in the wrong place."

Lex indicated where the plant had been. "Have it your way, but then explain why I'm so good at earth magic, traditionally a witch ability."

"And, Dafydd, aren't you particularly good at some witch abilities too?" Laura asked.

Way to have your friend stab you in the back. I glared at Paul, daring him to say something. He raised his hands in a not me! sort of gesture.

Lex was still watching me, an expression of polite interest on his face, sort of how do you intend to explain your way out of this one? look.

Sighing, I said, "Okay. Have it your way. If you want to call yourself a witch, go for it. And yes, I have been looking to form a coven. An earth…witch—" Yes, I had to force the word out. Sue me! "—would come in handy. We've got a witch-in-training, a warlock who channels angelic power and me. We're an odd coven already, so what the heck? Might as well invite you along."

Lex smiled.

I held up a warning finger. "Just one rule, though?"

"You're in charge?" Lex asked.

I shook my head. "Heck no! We make decisions together. No, I was going to say that Laura is my hacker of choice. No replacing her."

"Unless you can teach me techno magic," Laura hastily added.

I sighed. "Yeah, unless you can teach that."

Lex nodded. "Deal. What's next?"

I considered for a moment. "I guess I'll call a meeting of our newly expanded coven. If you're such a hot shot hacker, you should be able to find my phone number and text me yours. I'll call you when we've got a time set up."

My phone dinged, and I pulled it out. Seriously? That fast?

Laura even looked impressed. "That's not bad, Dafydd."

"Fine," I said to a smug-looking Lex. "I'll call you."

His face vanished, and the monitor looked none the worse for its experience. I turned away from it to face Laura and Paul.

"What have I done?"

Paul gave me his most encouraging smile. "Well, you said you wanted one more."

He was right. Okay. I've never been the most traditional warlock anyway. What made me think I'd attract a normal coven?

Paul and I made polite conversation for a few minutes with Laura before heading back home. The universe owed me the rest of my foot rub, darn it!

End

Everything tag: @archangelgabriellives (It’s sort of got Lex, so it’s okay, right?)

#warlockwriter fanfic #warlock case files #lex (the agency)#witchcraft

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kelleyschorn · 7 years ago

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Kelley Reviews: Upgrade

Yet another movie that I saw alone. Keeping up with the latest movies is busy work but for me it’s worth it! There are just so many good movies that come out that I can’t let any slip by my radar! I saw upgrade the day after I saw Adrift and let me tell you, that was quite the change of pace! This action packed, sci-fi revenge movie is fast moving, intense, and has some bad-ass fight scenes. It’s about a man, Grey played by Logan Marshall-Green, who gets into a terrible accident that is not so accidental leaving him a quadriplegic and his wife dead. From there Grey gets an AI implanted him to help him move again. This and the fact that the police investigation seems to be going nowhere, sparks his highly violent revenge mission against those who ruined his life. There are some twists and turns along the way and, like I said before the film is extremely violent and gory. Aside from this the movie was enjoyable and entertaining and kept me on my toes throughout. I definitely recommend this movie, just maybe don’t take along your five year old.

If you haven’t seen this movie yet, you should probably stop here and come back and join the discussion after!

Without further ado, here’s my in depth look at Upgrade. (In other words, this is where the SPOILERS start).

WHAT WORKED

Logan Marshall-Green does a great job portraying a broken man on a revenge mission. I had previously only seen him briefly in Spider-Man Homecoming so I was curious to see how he would handle the lead role and I am happy to report that he performed excellently. Because in the fight scenes, he is literally watching this AI use his body to kick ass his facial expressions or horror and disgust are priceless and add a needed comedic element to these scenes as well. The way he fought too with the jerky precision of a killer robot really sold the concept that he was being controlled by STEM.

The concept. The concept of this movie was captivating. I loved how effortlessly we were introduced to all the technology. They didn’t have to over explain anything, they just showed us the smart house and the self-driving talking car and we got it. I also liked that it was a grungier future world. Just because technology gets better, doesn’t mean we get cleaner as a whole society! It felt very realistic to how our own world might look in the near future. Fancy self-driving cars and homes that do everything for you and only the wealthy being able to afford such things while others exist more behind the technological heights. For me, the world made me think about things a little bit like how episodes of Black Mirror makes me think about things—but less scary.

The twist. Well, the double twist. When I found out it was the doctor I wasn’t quite shook, but I didn’t expect it. It wasn’t completely mind blowing but again, I didn’t expect it. And THEN, when we find out it’s not the doctor but STEM. That one really did throw me. The final fight between him and the cop had me at the edge of seat the entire time. The tension was there and I was there for it. At the very end of the movie, the line that is my favorite line from this movie overall was when STEM says through Grey, “He’s in his head where he wants to be. Living in reality is harder…” I admit I don’t remember this line word for word because I saw it over a week ago but if you’ve seen it, you know the line. Earlier in the film, Grey visits a hacker and all around them are these people who live for days and weeks in VR and he asks the hacker why. The hacker responds by saying that line. Something about how reality is harder and more painful than the fake reality. When STEM delivers this line at the end it gives it much more meaning and power. It gave me chills.

A lot of little details worked for me as well. I loved the look of the car. I loved that Grey was suspicious and resistant of technology because I could see myself being like him in a world like that. The fact that the world was patrolled by drones, again one of those things that to me, doesn’t feel too unrealistic of a next step from where we are.

WHAT DIDN’T WORK

So one part of the concept that didn’t quite work for me was that it did feel reminiscent of irobot at the beginning. Normal guy who rejects technology and even has his own car that he can drive himself and doesn’t drive on its own. That sense was quickly wiped away and yes, this thing is a bit nit-picky. Another nit-picky bit I’ll point out is that, while the self-driving car feels so advanced, clean and sophisticated, the arms that are installed to help out Grey after he’s paralyzed, look and feel like those stiff arm robots they have today. I thought those could have had a cleaner look to match the feel of new technology established by the car.

The other things that didn’t work were the characters. This has been mentioned in a couple of reviews but the characters who were in the movie besides grey were not fully realized. Other characters who could have benefited from being a bit more fleshed out were Aaron, the cop, and Grey’s wife. Especially Grey’s wife. I spent a good chunk of the movie wondering if she had a part in torturing these guys who had murdered her. They touch on the fact that her company was shady and tortured and experimented on these guys and others but Grey always insists upon his wife’s innocence. I kept waiting to find out that she had really been this horrible person who was in on all of that stuff and that was why they killed her but it never came and neither did much clarity on the story of her shady company. Apparently that doesn’t matter because it doesn’t really have much to do with why she was killed in the first place so all in all I think that plotline in general could have been put to better use or scrapped from the movie altogether seeing as they didn’t really take it as far as they could have.

Overall, this movie was great. It had some unexpected twists and that ending was just fantastic. Thank you for reading my blog and I’d love it if you joined the conversation by emailing me, tweeting me, or reaching out through any of my other social media accounts!

Next to come will be Ocean’s 8 and Hereditary!!!

#upgrade #upgrade movie #logan marshall-green #movie review

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mj-rogers · 6 years ago

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Some Notes: T Cooper’s “Real Man Adventures”

Honestly, didn’t love this one... it was an experimental structure that could have created a compelling whole, but instead came across as scattered, random, and occasionally... abrasive? I think I just didn’t like the author’s personality very much? Which perhaps isn’t a super fair response, but not liking someone’s personality makes it tough to enjoy their memoir since it’s all about them in their voice. The overarching theme of the memoir explored constructs of masculinity in American culture and the author’s observations of male social behavior in public/private life. Cooper seemed deeply conflicted about his own sense of masculinity and sometimes poked fun at, sometimes defended his insecurities around his height, passing privilege, whiteness. There were interviews between him and his friends/family, unsent letters, short poetry, some collage/photographs, personal anecdotes, essays, a list of famous men (mostly actors) who are Cooper’s height or shorter, a survey of his male friends’ bathroom habits (specifically, whether they sit or stand while they pee) and a lot of footnotes/asides/tangents. As much as trans discourse has worked to deconstruct a gender binary and emphasize the performative nature of masculinity/femininity, in this text, Cooper seems mostly interested in confirming whether or not he is a “real man,” and discerning whether the people around him see him as such or place him in the category of the “abnormal.” Throughout the work, he gives voice to his frustration at having to “out” himself to doctors, having people ask about the scars on his chest from his top surgery, and generally expresses a desire to pass as male without social scrutiny. Definitely gives voice to an important perspective on how people treat trans people like guinea pigs/don’t respect typical social boundaries and feel like they can ask invasive, personal questions to satiate their own curiosity. I sort of took his conclusion to be that he wishes there weren’t so many thresholds/requirements to being a man. But he also doesn’t use his observations to ultimately critique these limits on masculinity and argue for a more open paradigm. Rather, seems to resent that he sometimes can’t pass muster, just wants to “fit in.” At one point- discusses people who distance themselves from being a “trans man” or “trans woman” and simply want to be a “man” or “woman.” Asks a lot of questions of his family (”am I the same person?” “was I more boy/girl like as a child?”) and friends... analyzes moments where people accepted his gender presentation / apparent heterosexuality (”better go ask the missus”) versus challenged it... talks about how much he resents not having had the chance to play football, etc. So... rather than deconstructing masculinity / gender performance, seems to try and explore whether he personally “measures up” (sometimes literally) to normative standards for men.

He also manages to insult a lot of people and communities as he tells his story. Does a weird comparative suffering thing with quadriplegics, alcoholics... And then he brings up multiple times this defensive thing about how even though he’s white, people sometimes think he’s Mexican or Middle Eastern, which he claims gives him insight into what it’s like to be racially profiled in public spaces like airports? Equates this experience to his fear/anxiety around using public restrooms. These were some weird comparisons to me. One of the more egregious moments: insulting / degrading sex workers under the guise of critiquing masculinity. Played a game called “truck driver/hooker” as a kid, and as an adult, concludes that men act like strippers are sexy and exciting, but really what they’re doing is “desperate” and depressing. Lastly, talks a lot about how “masculine” his taste is (categorizing things like clothes, tv shows, sports), expresses pride in enjoying typically masculine activities. Makes a lot of jokes about how he just doesn’t “get” women, and his wife gets upset that he doesn’t understand her emotions. Also jokes (?) about how his wife is so hot that it validates his masculinity. These things felts weird and misogynistic.

All in all, I really wanted to like this book, especially because I thought the hybridized formal structure was interesting, but it just wasn’t my favorite. Misc notes -Discusses public nature of so many people’s transitions on YouTube, social media, but his own discomfort with this public paradigm, desire for privacy. Hints that post-top surgery photos may or may not be of him, includes a chapter on sex that simply says he says will not discuss his sex life, talks about everyone’s obsession with whether or not he has a dick and concludes it’s nobody’s business. Which are fair limits. But then, how does his desire for privacy fit in with writing a memoir. Difficult to negotiate these boundaries, especially in this genre; hard to anticipate/respond to reader questions while respecting author’s boundaries. -Emphasis on nuclear/biological family (wife, kids, brother, parents) -Personal coming out narrative: still a fraught relationship about his transition with his parents, with whom he is close but doesn’t discuss gender stuff. Talks about them but not to them, uses a proxy to address them (this object, interviews about them with brother, interviews with trans friends’ parents to see how they reacted to their children’s transitions to get a sense of how his parents might feel.

-Some reviews echo my sentiments. One review: “I didn’t like this book, but I wanted to.” A Goodreads conclusion: “T Cooper comes across as a real asshole. This is everything I dislike about some members of my male identified cohort. The belief in the binary, the reification of bullshit macho behavior as a result of T, and the general embrace of misogyny.”

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zolganif · 6 years ago

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I have fake nails on right now I’m listening to Miley Cyrus I think formspring is a just a big shit talking website I like coke zero way better than diet coke I listen to my music at a really loud level I absolutely adore dunkaroos Some days are way worse than others for no apparent reason The only makeup I wear on a daily basis is eyeliner I’ve been told that I’m a good kisser I miss TV shows from my childhood, I would still watch them today if they were still on I find it annoying when people don’t say “please” and “thank you” I love corn on the cob ^But I don’t love how it sometimes gets stuck in my teeth I’ve seen the pictures of the falling man from 9/11 and they make me really sad I’d rather be dead than a quadriplegic Family guy cracks me up I stubbed my toe today and it feels like it’s on fire I find the Holocaust and other horrific events very interesting I’m not a big fan of poetry, I find a lot of it very hard to understand I never learned how to do the Hoedown Throwdown I like the show Toddlers and Tiaras I have a whole bin in my room that is full to the top with shoes I love my siblings and I’m glad I’m not an only child ^That seems kinda lonely My favorite channel on TV is Bravo ^I love all the Real Housewives My room REALLY needs to be cleaned I hate running ^My boobs we’re not made for it I’m subscribed to Cosmopolitan magazine I prefer male singers to female ones Being pregnant is one of my worst fears I hate how it’s so much easier to gain weight than lose it I don’t get on facebook near as often as I used to I think having an affair with an older man sounds exciting Whenever I see a red Solo cup I always think about getting drunk I’m pretty damn decent at beer pong There’s alcohol in the room I’m in right now I’ve smoked a cigar before ^Mmm I like the band Forever the Sickest Kids I talk a lot of shit

I listen to Lady GaGa’s music every now and then. I am late to school at least 3 times a week. I love watching The Real Housewives Of New Jersey. I’ve been in a long-distance relationship more than once. I have an iPod Nano. ^And its orange. I don’t wear slippers. I cannot stand Justin Bieber. ^I honestly wonder why he is even famous. Most of my best friends don’t live in the same state as me. I forget things easily. I think the pizza flavored Goldfish are the best. I don’t like broccoli. I have a Last.fm account. I’ve had a mole cut off to see if it was cancerous. DQ Blizzards are fucking amazing. ^My favorite is the Cotton Candy. I’ve dated someone who played the drums in a band. I’ve never dated a redhead. My toenails are currently painted neon orange. I like sunsets better than sunrises. I’m not a fan of chocolate candy bars. I like watching UFC. ^I usually watch it with my boyfriend. I think about the past way too much, more than the average person. I’m not afraid to tell it like it is. ^Some people dislike me because of it. I got into a lot of physical fights in middle school. I’ve played Spin the Bottle at lunch before. I don’t like Jay-Z. I tend to stick my tongue out a lot in pictures when I’m drunk. ^I’m pretty much a camera whore in that state. I’ve lived in four houses throughout my life. I don’t use Limewire to download music.<-------No one can anymore. ^I think its nothing but a piece of shit. I sometimes buy hoodies on Ebay. I read a lot during the summer. I love every book by Ellen Hopkins. I’ve lost 3 loved ones due to someone else’s drunk driving. The first person I smoked weed with was my boyfriend. I have a high pain tolerance. I’ve dated someone more than once. I like bright colored earrings and shirts. I don’t drink soda.

#bolding survey

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jazy3 · 6 years ago

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Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 15X22

I thought I would hate this episode, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. Which should really be the new tag line for this season. Meredith and DeLuca are getting it on. It’s boring to watch. Also why is Meredith wearing a crop top to bed? Who does that? What was the wardrobe dept. thinking? Have they never slept before? She kicks him out so as not to disturb the kids. While I don’t like them together and I wish she would date someone else she does appear to be having fun and feeling joy again which is great.

Annnd he runs into Zola! This idiot can’t even sneak out of a house properly. The shade! Her face! She’s not having it! Zola’s face speaks for the majority of the fandom here. Can someone tell the writers? He comes back to Meredith’s room and tells her what happened. Apparently, Zola said nothing and went back to bed. Meredith tells him, “My kids know you as the sad guy from the couch.” Which is partly we hate him. He’s a loser! DeLuca says that was an embarrassing chapter in his life and apologizes again for it.

Meredith says she had a plan for telling her kids she was dating him. They were going to have ice cream and talk about their feelings and now that’s blown. I love what a great mom she is. DeLuca’s smiling like an idiot because she was planning on telling her kids about them. Mer rolls her eyes as do we all. Way to miss the point dude. Mer checks to make sure the coast is clear this time and then has him leave.

We cut to Owen. He’s holding a crying Leo and talking to Megan on the phone. She booked him a therapy appointment and is making sure he goes. Now we’re at the hospital. Oooh! I love Mer’s outfit! The blue jacket is fire! They’ve upgraded her wardrobe this season and I like it. Bailey’s on the phone. Her ex Tucker heard her son Tuck call Ben Dad and now he’s throwing a fit and making it her problem.

Tuck feels bad and Ben’s oblivious. Which is all pretty rich for someone who gave her an ultimatum after over a decade of marriage and cheated on her. What a bitch baby. Bailey is SO much better off without that jackass! Bailey says she’d rather talk about Mer’s problems, so they do that instead. She tells her about Zola seeing DeLuca but before Bailey can respond Alex walks up to them. Jo’s back.

Amelia, Link, and Tom work on the patient that became a quadriplegic and try to use an experimental treatment to give her back the use of her arms. Nico and Schmitt are talking. Nico’s fellowship is almost up and he’s applying to hospitals across the country which upsets Schmitt. It’s reminiscent of when Jo was applying to hospitals across the country.

Qadri treats a patient who thinks she has a bowel obstruction. I think it’s weird that they show her in the beginning misdiagnosing the patient and then she disappears after that. Per protocol she should have followed the patient’s treatment all the way through. Instead she disappears. DeLuca takes over part of it and then Richard takes over another part. Then a woman walks in with high heel shoes impales in her chest! Now we know what the title was referring too! She needs heart surgery to repair the damage. Richard recognizes her. Her name is Gemma and she’s an alcoholic too. He knows her from AA. Ollie was her sponsor too. It’s not a happy reunion.

Nico and Schmitt work on a young patient who needs cement injected into his spine to correct an issue that’s causing him pain. Bailey recognizes the boy’s grandfather. He’s a reoccurring bowel patient of Bailey’s. They’re very close. Meanwhile Alex is still treating Gus the autistic patient who needs rare blood to get better. He’s built a LEGO arc de triomphe! Alex goes and talks to Mer. Time is running out for Gus. Mer’s called Cristina and Marie Cerone trying to find some of the rare blood they need. No dice. I love the Cristina reference here! Mer asks how Jo’s doing. Alex says it’s happening again. They’re happy for a while then they break then they leave him. Mer says it’s not happening again. Poor Alex!

Mer gives Alex advice and says this isn’t like the other times. That they’re not broken, and they’ll be fine. Jo will talk when she’s ready. I love their friendship! Jo’s depressed and sitting in the lab not working. Jackson comes to see her and recruits her for his research. Owen goes to see the therapist Megan found for him. He’s sceptical and dismissive and a terrible patient, but he agrees to try. Qadri’s patient is in the CT machine and is in a lot of pain. DeLuca’s running the scan. He pages Mer for a consult.

He asks how Zola was this morning. Mer says she was surprisingly normal. DeLuca wonders out loud why they feel so guilty when they’re not doing anything wrong. That’s not exactly true. Meredith is an Attending. DeLuca is a resident. She’s already been down this road. It doesn’t usually end well and they really shouldn’t be dating. She asks him if he even likes kids because they haven’t really talked about it and she’s got 3 of them. DeLuca says he has 16 first cousins and tells stories about them. He says he likes kids and tells her jokingly that her kids might like him more than her. Mer thinks that’s a load of crap.

While that’s nice and everything it doesn’t change the fact that DeLuca’s a danger to children. He lost a kid who escaped, fell down a manhole, and almost died. He attempted to assault a child and should have been fired for it. I hate how they keep ret conning his character EVERY SINGLE EPISODE this season! There is no consistency and he’s really on my nerves.

The scans are up. Their patient’s pregnant and in labour. Meanwhile Richard tries to talk to Gemma whose having none of it. Back at the CT machine. OB is busy so Mer’s running this one. Bailey looks at the scans and realizes the patient has two wombs! But she’s only pregnant in one which explains the weird symptoms. Jackson tries to reach out to Jo. He doesn’t get very far. Eventually he figures out she’s drunk at work and has vodka in her water bottle. He tells if she ever does that again she won’t be met with compassion.

Amelia and Tom talk at the lab. He laughs at her for missing Link and calls him ‘ortho barbie’. Awwww he talks about how much he loves Teddy and gives her advice about Link. Bailey comes to see her friend and his grandson to see how the procedure went. Everything seems good until he tries to go to the bathroom. He’s halfway across the room when he collapses. Richard and Maggie have a heart to heart in the scrub room about Gemma. We learn that Richard paid the bar he smashed up a lot of money to settle the charge so he wouldn’t go to jail or lose his medical licence.

Bailey and Meredith have a heart to heart about their dilemmas. Bailey is way over Tucker’s nonsense. Aren’t we all? Mer asked how she told Tuck that she was dating Ben. She said on some level he already knew. That all you have to do is show up, make it clear what’s happening, and answer their questions because all they want to know is that you’re there for them and you’re not going anywhere no matter what. Sage advice. Owen’s at therapy. He’s trying the touch therapy with his therapist. We find out that Owen doesn’t trust joy because of what happened when his Dad died when he was a kid.

It’s a painful but necessary process to let go of the fear. I’m glad they’re finally addressing this part of Owen’s story. They’ve touched on it but never explored it. After a lifetime of abusing women this man needs help. Full stop. Amelia tells Tom about what really happened in Germany between Owen and Teddy. Amelia tries to help and tells Tom that Owen and Teddy are inevitable. I get where she’s coming from, but I disagree. I get that she’s trying to help, but nothing is inevitable. Owen has a lot of work to do to be whole and he’s a long way off. Teddy deserves someone who loves her, puts her first, and treats her well. Tom does that. Owen never has. Tom isn’t scared of inevitable! I love him!

Meanwhile Maggie is trying to save Nico’s patient. He screwed up somehow and now the patient’s pulmonary artery is destroyed. Richard comes and talks to Gemma. He makes her laugh and they talk it out. He tells her about the bar incident. Bailey’s on the phone with Tuck trying to smooth things over. She tells him she knows he didn’t mean to upset anyone, but it hurt his father’s feelings, so he’ll have to go back to calling Ben by his first name instead of Dad.

I’m not sure I agree. Neither Tuck nor Ben has done anything wrong. Ben is involved in Tuck’s life in a way Tucker isn’t and Tucker’s failings are the main reason him and Bailey are divorced. Who cares what he wants? That’s what you get. Bailey has to end the call because she sees her friend in the waiting room and is confused. He tells her something went really wrong with his grandson and she goes to find out what’s going on.

She enters the OR to find out he’s died. His heart gave out as a result of the complications from the ortho procedure. Bailey wants answers from Nico. He tells her the cement leaked causing a blood clot and he went into cardiac arrest. Bailey calls him on his crap. He screwed up and made a mistake and now a healthy 21-year-old man is dead. He was about to go to business school. Now he’ll never get the chance. Maggie leaves and Bailey tells Schmitt to close. She tells Nico he’s going to stand next to her while she tells the patient’s grandfather and that if he’s a good surgeon he’ll remember it and never make this mistake again.

‏Back at the lab Jackson tells Jo it was Meredith that asked him to look in on her. There’s a nice cover of Say Something here! Bailey gives her friend the terrible news. It’s gut wrenching to watch. I can’t imagine this man’s pain. Link invites Amelia to dinner. She accepts but stays back a minute to talk to Tom. Amelia speaks some real truth here. However, I still don’t agree with her advice to Tom. I hope he continues to fight for Teddy.

Schmitt comes to talk to Nico whose prepping for his Skype interview. He encourages him to postpone his interview because of what just happened. I agree with him. He suggests he re-schedule and they knock off for the night. In response Nico yells at him and says he doesn’t get it because he’s let failure rule his entire life and that it’s basically his identity. All of which is really unfair and uncalled for. Yes, that was true at one time, but it hasn’t been in a while. Schmitt’s made real progress. Also, he’s right here. Nico is in no condition to be interviewing.

He just killed a man through his own incompetence. Also, you don’t yell something like that at the person you’re dating especially when they’re right. Nico’s outburst proves that. Poor Schmitt. He deserves better. Nico goes ahead with the interview. Schmitt slams the door and walks out. Maggie and Jackson talk. He asks her to move in with him. Owen’s at home napping while Leo plays. His phone dings. It’s Teddy asking if he’s okay. He says yes and asks why. She says Megan texted her and said to check on dum dum because he had a hard day. I love Megan!

Owen texts back and says it was hard but good. He picks up Leo and plays with him. Alex arrives home. Jo’s still not talking to him. He calls her out for drinking at work. He says he’s done and he needs her to talk to him and that he loves her but he can’t do this. She says if he loves her he’ll leave her alone. He says he’s done playing that game. Alex starts yelling and says he should just go to Pittsburgh and find out what the hell happened to Jo. Jo says she’ll talk to him when she’s ready. She says if he ever threatens to go to Pittsburgh again she’ll leave him. He says if she ever comes to work drunk again he’ll tell Bailey. Jo says they have a deal.

Mer’s at home in her Dartmouth lounge wear. She brings the kids ice cream. She tells them that her and DeLuca have been spending more time together. Zola asks if he’s her boyfriend. She always knows what’s up! Mer says he is. Bailey asks what that means. Mer says it means she likes him a lot. But not more than them. Zola asks if she’s going to kiss him. Mer says probably. Bailey thinks this is super gross! Zola asks if he’s going to sleep on the couch again. Haha I love her! Mer says no, but that he might be coming around a lot more. But says that she’s not going anywhere and that they’re stuck with her. Zola asks if he can leave his guitar at home! They all laugh because they all equally hate his guitar playing. Some things never change.

So that’s that! Now onto next next week’s promo! It’s a cross over with Station 19. Schmitt comes in with the paramedics with a John Doe. Bailey recognizes him which presumably means he’s a Station 19 crew member. Meanwhile Mer and Alex are operating. Mer’s wearing her pink scrub cap with the swirls on it. Richard calls her into his office. Apparently, she does something that could cost Mer her medical licence! Someone almost falls off something really high. Jo talks to Ben about screwing up and then we see her running somewhere crying after she crashes into Richard. It looks intense! But the second half of this season has been super lack lustre so I’m trying not to get my hopes up too high.

Until next time.

Au revoir!

#grey's anatomy #Meredith Grey #reveiw #thoughts #critique #season 15 #15X22 #head over high heels

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matsboyd · 8 years ago

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can u like explain san junipero because I did Not understand that episode

omg okay this is just my interpretation?? but i’ll try my best let’s see also don’t read this if you don’t wanna be spoiled bc it will ruin the whole thing for you if you haven’t seen it

so as pretty much every other episode in black mirror this is placed in this futuristic kind of society, distopic or utopic that is up to you. but basically this corporation has come up with a system in which all people who die can go to san junipero and stay there forever, as in a kind of heaven i guess? like their souls or whatever tf you wanna call them are transported there and they “pass over” like they call it on the show. so instead of actually dying these people can stay in san junipero forever. this is completely optional tho. in san junipero they can do whatever the fuck they want, and they can like travel through time? whatever they imagine happens, i guess.

now our two principal characters, kelly and yorkie. they are not dead yet, like in real life. but apparently this corporation allows alive people full timers i think they are called in the episode?? i’m not sure to go to san junipero every saturday for like 5 hours. when the clock hits midnight they wake up again in their real lifes. so these two girls meet in san junipero but in real life they are dying. that is why it is so confusing when yorkie says she’s never been to a pub, that she’s never been in a relationship or had sex even though she is engaged? bc in real life yorkie is quadriplegic, has been since she was 21 so she hasn’t really been able to do much. so they meet every saturday, week after week, and by the end kelly asks yorkie to let her come visit her and by this she means go visit her real self is it cool if i call it real? do we consider san junipero unreal? idek

and idk waht else there’s to say? like kelly ends up marring yorkie so yorkie gets the euthanasia and then they fight over whether kelly is chosing to stay in san junipero or not. she has already decided she will not but, in the end, we see she actually decides to stay. what changed, i guess that’s up to you to think over. but yeah, that’s what i get from the episode, if i am missing something please let me know, or ask me if you wanna know something else!

also if someone wants to add something to the discussion pls go ahead, i would love to see all of your views!

#black mirror #san junipero #bian talks #answered #spoilers #Anonymous

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nanalikessurveys · 5 years ago

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Some days are way worse than others for no apparent reason The only makeup I wear on a daily basis is eyeliner I’ve been told that I’m a good kisser I miss TV shows from my childhood, I would still watch them today if they were still on I find it annoying when people don’t say “please” and “thank you” I love corn on the cob ^But I don’t love how it sometimes gets stuck in my teeth I’ve seen the pictures of the falling man from 9/11 and they make me really sad I’d rather be dead than a quadriplegic Family guy cracks me up I stubbed my toe today and it feels like it’s on fire I find the Holocaust and other horrific events very interesting I’m not a big fan of poetry, I find a lot of it very hard to understand I never learned how to do the Hoedown Throwdown I like the show Toddlers and Tiaras I have a whole bin in my room that is full to the top with shoes I love my siblings and I’m glad I’m not an only child ^That seems kinda lonely My favorite channel on TV is Bravo ^I love all the Real Housewives My room REALLY needs to be cleaned I hate running ^My boobs we’re not made for it I’m subscribed to Cosmopolitan magazine I prefer male singers to female ones Being pregnant is one of my worst fears I hate how it’s so much easier to gain weight than lose it I don’t get on facebook near as often as I used to I think having an affair with an older man sounds exciting Whenever I see a red Solo cup I always think about getting drunk I’m pretty damn decent at beer pong There’s alcohol in the room I’m in right now I’ve smoked a cigar before ^Mmm I like the band Forever the Sickest Kids I talk a lot of shit

I listen to Lady GaGa’s music every now and then. I am late to school at least 3 times a week. I love watching The Real Housewives Of New Jersey. I’ve been in a long-distance relationship more than once. I have an iPod Nano. ^And its orange. I don’t wear slippers. I cannot stand Justin Bieber. ^I honestly wonder why he is even famous. Most of my best friends don’t live in the same state as me. I forget things easily. I think the pizza flavored Goldfish are the best. I don’t like broccoli. I have a Last.fm account. I’ve had a mole cut off to see if it was cancerous. DQ Blizzards are fucking amazing. ^My favorite is the Cotton Candy. I’ve dated someone who played the drums in a band. I’ve never dated a redhead. My toenails are currently painted neon orange. I like sunsets better than sunrises. I’m not a fan of chocolate candy bars. I like watching UFC. ^I usually watch it with my boyfriend. I think about the past way too much, more than the average person. I’m not afraid to tell it like it is. ^Some people dislike me because of it. I got into a lot of physical fights in middle school. I’ve played Spin the Bottle at lunch before. I don’t like Jay-Z. I tend to stick my tongue out a lot in pictures when I’m drunk. ^I’m pretty much a camera whore in that state. I’ve lived in four houses throughout my life. I don’t use Limewire to download music. ^I think its nothing but a piece of shit. I sometimes buy hoodies on Ebay. I read a lot during the summer. I love every book by Ellen Hopkins. I’ve lost 3 loved ones due to someone else’s drunk driving. The first person I smoked weed with was my boyfriend. I have a high pain tolerance. I’ve dated someone more than once. I like bright colored earrings and shirts. I don’t drink soda.

—

Which season suits you best?

Summer You love your freedom You’d rather be hot than cold You love swimming You tan easily You love grilling/barbecuing You like fireworks You were born in the summer Your favorite holiday is the 4th of July You like the beach You live in the south You hate wearing pants You love lemonade or iced tea You own more than one bathing suit You like water parks You own a convertible #: 7

Fall You’re constantly changing your looks You love sweaters Halloween or Thanksgiving is your favorite holiday You like to eat squash Your favorite sport is football You love haunted houses You prefer to call it ‘autumn’ You love pumpkin flavored things Your favorite color is orange You like apple cider You like to see the leaves change color You like voting You love going back to school You live in the midwest You were born in the fall #: 2

Winter You’d rather be cold than hot You own at least three scarves Christmas is your favorite holiday You love snow You like to use your fireplace You like hot chocolate You love to snuggle You go big on New Year’s Eve You know how to ski You live in the north You love ice skating You love to wear fur or leather You were born in the winter You have built a snowman before You loved Frozen #: 7.5

Spring You love plants You have a green thumb Easter is your favorite holiday You like pastel colors You love a cool breeze You like the sound of rain You were born in the spring You love starting things fresh You like to eat salads You love picnics You love to write poetry You have been to prom You’re not scared of bugs You like going to festivals You like to pick flowers #: 5

You are: winter

—

Personality I like meeting new people all the time I’ve been called a nerd before I enjoy going out to many different social events I’m a very calm person I talk loudly I like to stay inside and do something that makes me feel comfortable I cry a lot I’m obsessed with sports I read a lot of books I like a really busy schedule I’m very disorganized I like to give other people instructions I like art that teaches life lessons I sometimes throw or break objects when I’m angry I tend to exaggerate things in my mind to make them seem worse I like things that are cute I’m a left brained person I’m a right brained person

Appearance I dress in simple clothing (t-shirts, jeans, sweats, etc) I have long hair I wear make-up I get paler skin during the winter season I think people who dress really casually look attractive I have a beard I have big eyes I’m very short I’m very tall I have at least five standards for looks when dating someone I have dark hair I’m very skinny I only date people that have a specific weight I like to dress in revealing clothing I prefer comfortable clothes over fashionable clothes

Interests I love music I like coding and programming I generally prefer artistic things over technical things I play video games often I like big stories with many different characters I enjoy watching movies I own a collection of something I play one or more sports I love baking I learned a different language for fun I’ve made up and/or written a story before I do many different community activities I like designing (interior, cover art, architecture, etc) I spend a lot of time on fashion I enjoy getting to know more about someone’s personality I like looking at media (books, movies, music, games, etc) critically

Other I mostly listen to rap music I’m obsessed with celebrities I feel lonely sometimes I have two or more close friends I don’t really mind dentist or doctor appointments I’ve held a gun before I get along well with people I have things in common with I think I’m a likable person I hate snow I’m friends with everyone I know I know someone on Tumblr/LJ I’d like to get to know better I’ve been to Japan I own a GameCube I like raspberries I’m a feminist I smoke tobacco I make at least 15 phone calls every week I respect people with other religious beliefs I wish I had someone to talk to when I’m angry or upset I always wear sunglasses when I can I have been on a cruise ship before I would rather stay home and cuddle than go out and party I have experienced discrimination I can play the piano I’ve skipped an entire night I like to have a lot of light in my room I think thigh highs are cute I have school tomorrow I’m not a virgin I’m a dork

#survey #surveys #bold surveys

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mikemortgage · 6 years ago

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Material things don’t define happiness, so why are we obsessed with money?

Book excerpt: In Melissa Leong’s latest book, Happy Go Money, the former Financial Post reporter challenges everyone to revamp their relationship with money. Here’s where to start.

“If I only had a little more money, I’d be happier.”

When was the last time that you had this thought? Every day, we make choices based on the idea that joy can be bought and that more money makes everything better. We take the new job with the extra hour in trafﬁc because it pays more. We put a coat on credit because it’s designer. We buy the big house because it has a yard for our future kids and a kitchen island that’s “an entertainer’s dream.”

To be fair, scientiﬁcally speaking, when we see something we want, a new pair of shoes or a gadget, we do feel joy; it triggers a patch of tissue in the brain, the nucleus accumbens, the so-called sex and money area. It gets activated when humans receive a reward, whether drugs, money or food. Then when we buy something, we get a delicious burst of dopamine in the brain.

That sounds sexy and yummy and all, but the euphoria doesn’t last. Then we just need more stuff. All that crap we buy loses its lustre. When the novelty wears off and the shopping high from the endorphin and dopamine dump dissipates, we’re left with a void and possibly regret.

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All the frugality in the world won't let this millennial retire at 45

“Why did I spend money on this?!?” we ask. Because I need it. Because I deserve it. Because I had a rough day. Because I have no willpower. Because it was on sale. Because it’s a habit. Because it was a whim, a knee-jerk reaction. But when you get down to it? Because I want to be happy.

So, what do we actually need to be happy? Let’s break down our thoughts on the subject and rebuild. This is me swinging on a wrecking ball (fully clothed) to help.

The magic number

We all need a certain amount of money to be happy. But how much?

For those of us who are on the verge of losing our homes, who fret about feeding our children, who cringe when the phone rings because debt collectors may be calling, without question, more money will make us happier. But for the rest of us, before connecting cash with joy, we need to talk about what we mean by “happy.”

Scientists in neuroeconomics (the study of how we make economic decisions) break happiness into two types:

1. Life satisfaction: an evaluation of your well-being as a whole (the kind of happy where you’re pleased with life in general). 2. Day-to-day mood: the highs and lows; the joy, stress, sadness, anger and affection that you experience from one moment to the next — how you feel today, how you felt yesterday. (The kind of happy that most of us relate to — the right now happiness.)

With life satisfaction, the richer people got, the more satisﬁed they were with their lives. In worldwide studies, people in richer countries reported higher life satisfaction than those in poorer countries. (We should also consider that wealthier countries are more politically stable, more peaceful and less oppressive — which affects well-being.) But according to a 2018 Purdue University study, there was a limit: $95,000 U.S. (pre-tax, per single-family household). Above that, more money didn’t mean that you were more satisﬁed. With day-to-day happiness, the threshold is $60,000 to $75,000 per household, according to various studies. The 2018 study showed that after these salaries are met, life satisfaction and day-to-day happiness actually slightly decrease with more money.

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What the what?

Well, apparently, when all of our basic needs are met, we become driven by other desires such as chasing after more material stuff and comparing ourselves to others, which make us unhappy. Also, high incomes can come with high demands (more working hours, more stress and less time with family and for leisure).

This doesn’t mean that we should all go out and try to make exactly $75,000 a year — our so-called feel-good ﬁnancial sweet spot. The studies are averages, and we all need different things to be happy. But all of us ﬁnd joy in some simple things — kisses, laughter, getting ID’d over the age of 25.

Marketing professor Hal Hershﬁeld once told me, “Even if I have an amazing car in my driveway, a huge house and a big fat income, that doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll be happier on a day-by-day basis, because the types of things that inﬂuence happiness are who I interact with, how I spend my time and the things that I do.”

Think of some of your happiest times in the past week. Were you spending it with people? Were you taking time to enjoy an activity, going for a run or catching up with a good friend? Would a wad of cash have made those moments that much better?

Probably not. If you answered “yes” to the latter question, how much more do you need to be happy? Read on.

Your magic number is probably wrong

Let’s do an exercise together.

How happy are you on a scale of one to ten?

Now think about how much money you have in the bank, your salary. How much more money would you need to be a perfect 10?

Michael Norton, who teaches at Harvard Business School and co-authored Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending, surveyed average-income earners and high-net-worth Britons (with a net worth of more than $1 million), and he asked them those questions. “Everybody said two to three times as much money,” Norton told me.

“Why is that a problem?” I asked, estimating the same for myself.

“That’s a problem because people at $1 million said, ‘If I had $3 million, I’d be a perfect 10. Except that people who had $3 million said, ‘If I had $9 million, I’d be a perfect 10.’”

Basically, happiness is on a sliding scale. Think about how much this sucks. No matter what you have, you’ll always want more. Even if you have millions. When you ﬁnd the gold at the end of the rainbow, the pot is just too damn small, and then you’re off again, chasing more rainbows.

It’s like a curse really. It also takes the fun out of my childhood dream of winning a million-dollar lottery. That was the very ﬁrst fantasy I ever had: winning a jackpot and marrying one of the New Kids on the Block (anyone but Danny). I’d have fancy clothes and we’d eat at Red Lobster every weekend. (Still my idea of a hot date today.)

But despite what we may think, winning the lottery doesn’t buy you a one-way ticket to Euphoria Town. Take this famous study from 1978 where researchers asked two very different groups about their happiness: recent Illinois State Lottery winners who scored $50,000 to $1 million and recent victims of catastrophic accidents who were now paraplegic or quadriplegic. They asked the lottery winners and the accident victims to rate how happy they were at that stage of their lives, how happy they were before the life-altering event and how happy they expected to be in a few years. They asked them to rate how pleasant they found simple activities (talking with a friend, watching TV, eating breakfast, buying clothes, getting a compliment, etc.).

Seriously? Who’s happier, the person cruising in the wheelchair or in the Lamborghini?

Yes, the lottery winners were happier in the moment. The winners reported feeling more present happiness. But the people with disabilities rated their future happiness higher. They also enjoyed the simple things in life more: they had more appreciation for the mundane pleasures of things such as hearing a joke or reading a magazine. Actually, research shows a link between high income and a reduced ability to savour small pleasures. Experts blame it on hedonic adaptation — our tendency to just get used to whatever we have. Even a dramatic life improvement eventually becomes the new normal. You don’t smell the roses because they’re everywhere, any time of the day. And research has shown that our inner thermostats are set some-where between happiness and sadness: they can rise and fall depending on circumstance, but they generally return to that baseline. So, if you were a miserable moaner before hitting the jackpot, you’ll likely just be a rich miserable moaner.

In another real-life example, Markus Persson, who created Minecraft and sold it to Microsoft for $2.5 billion in 2014, reportedly bought a $70-million mansion, complete with a candy wall, vodka and tequila bars, designer ﬁre extinguishers (because safety ﬁrst, fashion second) and 15 bathrooms equipped with $5,000 remote-control operated toilets with air deodorizers and heated seats. But in 2015, he tweeted, “Hanging out in Ibiza with a bunch of friends and partying with famous people, able to do whatever I want, and I’ve never felt more isolated.” In another tweet, he said, “The problem with getting everything is you run out of reasons to keep trying, and human interaction becomes impossible due to imbalance.”

Now this could be super depressing to you. For me, it’s reassuring. It tells me that no single event or any material thing or external factor ultimately deﬁnes my happiness. Human beings are adaptable. A million dollars or a misfortune, over time, can become the new normal. Sure, with money, you’ll enjoy stylishly ﬁghting ﬁre with your Louis Vuitton extinguisher, but the riches may also make old pleasures seem less enjoyable.

So remember, there’s a better use of your money than playing the lottery. The odds of winning the Powerball jackpot prize are 1 in 292 million — and odds are that more money won’t guarantee that your days will be happier anyway.

Your happy money to-do list

If you ﬁnd yourself thinking, “If I only had [insert anything], I’d be happy,” challenge it. Ask your partner or co-worker or friend to poke you (lovingly) if they ever hear you say that phrase. It’ll be like that awful baby shower game where you can’t say “baby” — but for your life.

If you’re relying on something (or someone) to make you happy, you’re wasting your time and energy. If afﬁrmations are your jam, write this down and stick it somewhere: “I control my own happiness.”

Name three big things that make you happy regardless of money (good health or a loving partner). Now name three very speciﬁc things (sleeping in on the weekend, your jam on repeat). Repeat the exercise every time you feel crappy about your ﬁnancial situation — or any situation.

Stop playing the lottery. Now. Next time you want to play the lottery, buy someone a coffee or put the money into a donation box instead for a guaranteed happiness payoff.

Money talks

If you think more money would make you happier, how much more?

How would your life be better with more money?

Think of a time when you made less money. Were you unhappier then? How much?

Think of some of your happiest moments from the last week. Would more money have made those moments better?

from Financial Post http://bit.ly/2ADhzza via IFTTT Blogger Mortgage Tumblr Mortgage Evernote Mortgage Wordpress Mortgage href="https://www.diigo.com/user/gelsi11">Diigo Mortgage

#IFTTT #Financial Post

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sallysklar · 6 years ago

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Janresseger: What to Do to Support Students Who Are Chronically Absent from School?

Two new reports—from the Economic Policy Institute (EPI) and from Attendance Works—explore chronic student absenteeism and its consequences for student achievement and graduation. Under the Every Student Succeeds Act, states must begin reporting data about students’ chronic absence in their accountability reports. Attendance Works even posts an online interactive map from the Hamilton Project at the Brookings Institution where a person can find chronic absence data about one’s own school district.

Chronic absenteeism is defined as students missing not just days but also weeks of school. Attendance Works defines chronic absenteeism as, “missing 10 percent of school—the equivalent of two days every month or 18 days over a 180-day school year.” While all school districts record students’ absences from school, until recent years most have not tracked each individual student’s accrued absences over the semester or the school year. Now school districts are required to watch and intervene when individual students’ attendance patterns become worrisome.

What is clear is that, while there are a number of ways researchers measure students’ chronic absence from school, the problem is serious: When students miss too much school, they learn less, they fall behind, and they are more likely to drop out without graduating. And students who are poor are more likely to miss school.

Writing for Attendance Works, Hedy Chang, Lauren Bauer, and Vaughan Byrnes explain: “Especially hard hit are children who live in poverty, have chronic health conditions or disabilities, or experience homelessness or frequent moves. When chronic absence reaches high levels in a school or classroom, it can affect every student’s opportunity to learn, because the resulting churn—with students cycling in and out of the classroom—is disruptive for all and hampers teachers’ ability to meet students’ diverse learning needs.”

And before they delve into a data analysis, EPI researchers, Emma Garcia and Elaine Weiss summarize past research: “Poor health, parents’ nonstandard work schedules, low socioeconomic status… changes in adult household composition (e.g. adults moving into or out of the household), residential mobility, and extensive family responsibilities (e.g. children looking after siblings)—along with inadequate supports for students within the educational system (e.g. lack of adequate transprtation, unsafe conditions, lack of medical services, harsh disciplinary measures, etc.)—are all associated with a greater likelihood of being absent, and particularly with being chronically absent.”

When we think about chronic absence, most of us think about students who cut school to hang out—students who are bored or disaffected. But other issues are harder to address. One teacher I know told me about a student who was late every day because she had to wait to come to school until a van came to take her quadriplegic mother to a care center. Another teacher who has been substituting in a huge high school told me he was frustrated because in the five sections of the English class he had to teach every day, it seemed that a different group of students was present each day. It seemed baffling to cope with the churn.

From the University of California at Berkeley and the Learning Policy Institute, David Kirp describes a new program in Los Angeles that seems to be paying off: “The Los Angeles Unified School District has invested in a new, low-cost approach to curbing absenteeism that’s been proven to move the needle. It’s a simple, potent idea: Enlist parents as allies in keeping their kids in school.” Many parents, he writes, are unaware that their children are missing school: “To correct these misperceptions and to enlist parents in keeping kids in school, 190,000 Los Angeles families whose kids met the chronically absent standard in the past will be mailed attendance information five times a year.” The letters are simple: “Billy has missed more school than his classmates—16 days so far in this school year… Students fall behind when they miss school. …Absences matter and you can help.” Kirp reports that chronic absenteeism has dropped not only in Los Angeles, but also by 10 or 15 percent in Philadelphia and Chicago after such reporting to parents becomes routine.

The research from EPI and Attendance Works, however, indicates that chronic absenteeism very frequently reflects that students who miss school are facing serious health and family challenges which can be addressed only through additional support by teachers, counselors and social workers to help students find ways to make their own schooling a priority even when other problems intervene.

Two primary school reforms come to mind. The first is to make classes small enough that teachers can really come to know their students and the barriers for students that make school attendance difficult. This is harder in a middle school or high school, however, where teachers work with likely five classes a day—a total of 125 students even when class size is kept at 25 students.

The benefits of wrap-around, full-service Community Schools (see here or here) become apparent in the context of such challenges. With medical and dental clinics located in the school, parents don’t have to keep kids out of school because they have forgotten the necessary immunizations. The toothache can be addressed promptly with only an hour away from class. Such schools also employ social workers to help families balance the responsibilities that sometimes put care-giving in conflict with school and to help parents and students address issues like transportation.

These schools are also designed to welcome families warmly and authentically. In Community Schools in Action (Oxford University Press, 2005), the assistant director of the New York Children’s Aid Society National Technical Assistance Center for Community Schools, Hersilia Mendez describes the role of parent outreach and parent engagement in a Community School: “In its work in Community Schools, the Children’s Aid Society sees parents as assets and key allies, not as burdens; we aim not only to increase the number of parents involved in their children’s education but also to deepen the intensity of their involvement and to encourage greater participation in their children’s future. As we engage parents in skills workshops and advocacy events, we also create a critical link to the home, allowing us to serve and empower whole families… The Children’s Aid Society wanted to erase the mixed invitation that schools often extend to parents—that parents should be involved in their children’s schooling but only on the school’s terms and often in rather menial ways… For an immigrant like me… Public School 5’s warm atmosphere was beyond belief. The beautifully furnished family room, the smell of fresh coffee, the presence of so many parents at all times, and, in particular, the friendly disposition of the staff were heartwarming. To me, it was an inconceivable atmosphere to find in any school, let alone a New York City public school… The parent involvement model is culturally responsive and provides multiple entry points for meeting parents at their level as well as multiple opportunities to engage with, support, and strengthen the school.” (pp. 42-45)

elaine October 5, 2018

Source

Janresseger

Janresseger: What to Do to Support Students Who Are Chronically Absent from School? published first on https://buyessayscheapservice.tumblr.com/

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trishgibsontx · 8 years ago

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how I discovered my greatest joy when I was completely broke/in housing court, my “loved ones” abandoned me, and I had no idea where my life was going.

photo by my beautiful patient Babita Patel

it was one of the most difficult of times for me.

since high school, I would always describe myself as driven by my own passion, even when that passion didn’t work out. in fact, my passion didn’t translate well or at all in the outer world hundreds of times. and I mean it – hundreds of times. business ventures I wanted to start with others failed immediately post-college, I trusted the wrong people, blah blah blah. I always kept going anyhow. when the title of this blog post hit me in real-time, I had trouble accessing my drive and passion. because my life was in total shut-down mode. I was being told something by the Universe, but I couldn’t hear it so clearly.

there I was, nearly 10 years post college, and post corporate America in which I had had a “socially acceptable” job for a number of years in the finance sector. had I stayed, I would have made a lot of money. the month I left corporate for good, I had a serious job offer on the table. it was for a then-cutting-edge financial media company that actually went public just a few years later. the offer was me in at the ground level with a quarter of a million base. who knows, maybe I would have been a shareholder and cashed in when the company sold. I said no. I chose, instead, to continue working toward creativity and human service. this was a struggle, internally, and externally (always late on rent), but I was…HAPPY. then, I don’t know if it happened in one day or one week or one month, but making it on my own came to a close. a shut-down. it lasted on and off for about 2 years.

this 2 year period was nearly comical given all that I had done/”accomplished” in the past; because absolutely no one wanted to hire me for work. at the onset of this 2 year period of destruction, I had begun it with my own freelance company. I was also working several odd jobs as well. I worked part-time at a boutique dress shop in the east village. I lived on my favorite block. I rented out my 6×10 living room slash kitchen that was taken up by a twin bed, so that I could make my rent. I made concessions my friends cringed at. I played in a rock band and tapped into my creativity which was lovely. I worked on indie films in multiple roles. some of those films totally screwed me financially or otherwise. in fact I think there were about 3 horrible indie film experiences. several of them are not even on my resume. I organized major events (for film projects) and got stiffed on being paid. I quietly (and for free) did consulting readings for various people and practiced energy work on them – but I was too scared to come out of that closet publicly. I didn’t know how good I actually was, even though I had an inkling. it was more of the fear of being public than anything else.

then, suddenly, all of the side work stopped and no one wanted to hire me. NO ONE. I had thousands of email records, applying for various roles in absolutely every industry one could imagine: medicine, finance, administration, education, fashion, hospitality, beauty. usually the feedback was “you are overqualified” or “we don’t understand your focus”. quickly and surely, there was no money left for rent. my landlord showed up at my door when I had someone there for consulting work and asked for rent. I didn’t have it. it was awful.

housing court sucked, royally. hardly anyone I knew socially, except some family members, knew I was there, and I was too ashamed to tell. I was a white American woman with an education — how dare I end up there! — that is the response I was expecting (and the response I did in fact receive from some people), and in a way, I believed that I had no right to be in the position I was. I had skills…I spoke several languages…I was resourceful. yet, something was crashing. finally I stopped working at the dress shop and I couldn’t even afford to eat. that dress shop was my lifeline, and some asshole coworker (who admittedly thought I “had it all!”) set me up by repeatedly saying I left the door unlocked after my shift. it was her life’s dream, one day, to become a retail store manager.

one day, during my usual coffee shop job solicitation email binges, I met with a consultant friend of mine. I told him about what was happening and the shame was too great to share the whole story. but I said I might be in trouble with paying my rent, and that “things were slow”. he said “stop telling people everything is ok. tell them what is happening”. I thought, what a novel idea. it had been ingrained in me that if I wasn’t serving someone ELSE, or their needs, I did not even exist. so it was hard to say the truth. 5 minutes after my consultat friend left, the very next person who contacted me was someone I had been fond of and very supportive of over the years. he was nearly a quadriplegic. I never saw him like that. we would go out for drinks and I would push him around and he told me that I made him feel like he could walk. this person messaged me on facebook and said “hey, how are you?”. I told him. that I was facing housing court next week and I was in back-rent for 5k+. he said “no problem, you can be my muse and do some copy editing for me. I’ll pay you x per hour and take care of your housing court bill”. I said no immediately. the relationship I had with people “helping” me had always been a strings-attached scenario. never had anyone helped me just to actually help. I had also never borrowed money like that before. so I was scared that there was some agenda. I thought, what could this person possibly want? he can’t walk. we are friends. ok, I will say yes. it took me until the day OF court to say yes. he had already offered a handful of times. I knew part of my lesson in the situation was to accept help. I had always been made to feel as though I was a burden for needing ANYTHING, so this was hard. after I said yes, we went out for drinks. my “friend” proposed I take him to strip clubs and share sexual acts with him. part of me understood him, and part of me was destroyed. of course I would not entertain that. I saved our correspondence “just in case”. it took me longer than I thought it would to pay him back, and he became angry, abusive and stalkerish.

I continued to do as much side work as possible to eat and keep my phone on. I also realized, I was working for free most all of the time. I put my heart and soul toward productions, seed ideas for productions, I gave away free healings and consult, and more. I was an idea machine and I was not monetizing it. I didn’t realize at the time that it had everything to do with being afraid to monetize for my time. it was also an old pattern of being used and taken advantage of, but I did not see it. and I never ever saw myself as a victim. I hated victims or victim mentality. I actually still have little patience for that. so I suffered quietly. some side work, like assisting a wonderful voice teacher with her business development, was all I had integrity-wise and monetary-wise. I am grateful to have had Lynn Singer in my life during that time. I would go up on her beautiful doorman high-rise rooftop in Chelsea and imagine I was the person I am TODAY.

I kept looking for “real” jobs. I came up empty. I began walking the hyper pit bull that belonged to my next door Vietnam vet neighbor who could barely walk. he lived in one of those AMAZING old loft duplexes with a garage in the east village. I would clean his apartment, which was covered in dog urine and the scent of death from the previous owners of like 1975 – seriously, the entire front part of the duplex was still an old office from the 70s! he never cleaned it because it had belong to someone else. who apparently died. probably in that very room. one day I realized that he thought we were dating. he would pay me 100 bucks a visit and one day he tried to kiss me. I wasn’t afraid of him because he could literally not walk. but it just…no. God bless him. I stayed friendly. I didn’t go back. I sent holiday cards and called him once in a while. he was a special soul.

during much of this, I was ironically in surrender mode. I wasn’t crying. I didn’t complain at all. I knew in my core something spiritual was taking place within me, if only I could keep listening. I went to bikram yoga every day and did the work study program for free classes. I had a huge bag of oatmeal, a huge bag of pasta, and running water. I was good! I rented out my “living room” right next to my tiny bedroom to nice people I found on Craigslist as much as I could. finally, I decided that the only way I could feel of value was to volunteer, but in an actual volunteer position — not a working-for-free while being taken advantage of position. a REAL volunteer job, where the energetic balance was reciprocal. I knew also, that balanced energy monetizes in some way, and ultimately takes care of us. I began mentoring and creating curriculum for handicapped children and adults. I would ride the train to Brooklyn each week, and it was 90 minutes each way.

I will never forget one of my first days on the job. as I rode that train all the way out to the Hasidic parts of BK, my body began to buzz. head to toe. I began to burst with unconditional love in my heart. I wanted to cry, but with joy. when I would get to the classroom, I would teach different subjects with the resident psychologist. we got along amazingly well, and the mentally and physically handicapped children and adults took a special liking to me. one day someone in class learned how to write three letters freehand. they felt like they won a Pulitzer. their joy was palpable to the point of their own tears. I felt like I was choking to maintain my composure. THESE PEOPLE GAVE ME SO MUCH. more than I had ever been given in my entire life. things like this continued to happen. the buzzing high I got on the train increased, and I realized what the Universe was trying to tell me throughout the roughly 2 year period of my life’s collapse (again – it had collapsed before! just not to this degree in the physical world): “put your healing and consulting skills on the map. put it online. tell people. come out of the closet. if you do not do this, we will keep challenging you”. I was so afraid of how I would be judged, because this was the truest part of me. the ONLY part of me that actually mattered to me.

one day, as I sat in the middle of my living room with a broken laptop and no TV, in dead silence, with my cats, I asked — screamed — out loud, “what do you want me to do!?”. I knew. and yet I was scared. but I had no choice. the hundreds of emails per DAY that I was sending out went unanswered. the Universe didn’t care if I could make 6 figures plus based on my “degree”. it didn’t want me in a box, even though I was trying to fit. it didn’t want me producing film at that moment. it wanted me in my purpose, and I was too exhausted to question it anymore. I had a book called “Living In The Light” by Shakti Gawain, that was recommended by my then-new-friend Vanessa. she is now a holistic nurse or doctor. in the book, I landed up on one line that said something like “everything we need to take care of ourselves in the physical world is ALREADY WITHIN US”. it hit me that my degrees, my blah blah blah, meant nada. it was ok to “come out” with my inner gifts and behind the scenes work, and it was ok to monetize it. I marinated on that for a few weeks.

I thought of the palpable, life-altering joy I felt on those long train rides to Brooklyn, and how spirit literally entered my body. I thought of the dozens of screw-overs in film and entertainment, and other jobs I tried to do for people who lived only on ego. I thought of how my “best friend” at the time abandoned and criticized me for being “selfish” because I wouldn’t visit her out of state, and how other loved ones berated me via email and phone for being in the position I was. I thought of how I didn’t fit in anywhere, it seemed, and how no one even wanted me to wait tables (I had littered ALL of downtown with my photo and resume and hospitality experience). I thought of how I had stuffed my resume, photo and cover letter in every mailbox in my neighborhood that I could find, hoping someone would call me for work. I had tried everything, and nothing was changing — except somehow the increased awareness of INNER HAPPINESS (which had, obviously, nothing to do with my circumstances) and message of purpose (healing and consulting others).

in the midst of all of the above, I tapped into a joy that is ironic considering how awful things were. I was like a rubber band being stretched in both directions: on one end, my physical and “on-paper” life was a disaster — and on the other hand, I WAS SO FUCKING HAPPY (people actually thought I was a millionaire and would ask me for jobs, all during this time). I didn’t even know why I was happy. but it shot straight from my core on a daily basis. there I was, at the bottom of the barrel of life, no friends nearby, pretty much zero support, I felt like a loser, I thought the world hated me, everywhere I turned there was a villian or monster looking to take me for a ride, I could barely keep the lights on, I had nothing — except myself. and those train rides. and that joy that I shared with people who didn’t share some of my outer blessings, but they shared my inner blessings: natural love and joy. they were not driven by appearance or money or reputation. they just wanted to learn the alphabet. I learned, once and for all, what it was to just breathe and be so incredibly thankful for that. I maintained that gratitude for a ridiculous amount of time. and my life was never the same.

and so one day I put my practice on a crappy wordpress site with just a phone number, no photo and no bio… and the rest is history.

The post how I discovered my greatest joy when I was completely broke/in housing court, my “loved ones” abandoned me, and I had no idea where my life was going. appeared first on The Medical Intuitive Blog: Energy Medicine & Reiki Therapy By Elaine™.

from Trisha Gibson http://www.themedicalintuitiveblog.com/2017/04/28/discovered-greatest-joy-completely-brokein-housing-court-loved-ones-abandoned-no-idea-life-going/

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