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#who abandoned him to be tortured by the RDA
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You would think Jake Sully who used to be human would be more sympathetic and caring towards spider. Referring to him as a stray cat made me want to drive my fist through his cute blue face.
Spider is loyal and loving towards those who are emotionally closed off and they expect me to be normal about this????
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kamiko1234 · 6 months
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Recently got into Avatar bc of Spider (I love him and his character is SO interesting tbh), and one thing that rly shocked me is RDA Spider not being a bigger thing ? Because honestly ? If I was in his shoes I SO would have gone with the RDA purley out of spite. Like- this obviously neglected boy only wants a family. He desperately tries and does anything to make himself fit in with the Sully's. But all he gets back is hate and neglect from the adults he so desperately wants to accept him. And now imagine him getting captured and left behind by the adults he trusted and loved. And if that wasn't enough, so did his friends who were basically his siblings. The only ppl who atleast seemed like they gave a damn about him and loved him. And yet he STILL remains loyal, he still refuses to break under torture. And then he's with Quaritch and suddenly he gets a sliver of what he always wanted. He is included (to some degree at least) . He has an adult that (at least seems) to care for him. And it comes from the enemy of all places ! But even that still saw him loyal to the Na'vi, he was horrified when he truly saw what the RDA did. But then- then the Neytiri thing happened. The woman he pretty much saw as his step-mum but a knife to his throat, and Quaritch who he knew hated Jake, let Kiri go to save Spider. I'm not gonna lie, in his shoes I'd have gone with Quaritch the second he asked. Unironically. I'd be bitter as hell. Imagine being a 16 y/o kid constantly neglected. Your family and friends abandon you. The enemy is nicer to you than those you saw as your family. You watched him practically save your life while the ppl who you thought cared about you either put a knife to your throat or stood by for all that mattered. I'd be out for blood. And genuinely I think it would have been completely deserved for Spider to just say fuck it and go with the only parental figure he ever knew. I mean fuck, some people are mad about him SAVING QUARITCH'S LIFE ? They should be happy Spider didn't go with him to the RDA straight up ! Like ngl this AU is an untapped pool of angst and content that needs exploring. Especially Spider's justified anger for his mistreatment.
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ghost-runner · 2 years
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“Useless” and “Troubled” until the End: Pt. 3
Sully Family x “Useless” Fourth Child Male Reader
Summary: Y/N was taken captive by Quaritch’s Na’vi Recombinant squad and is being used as leverage against the Sully family to get Jake to come out of hiding. The Sullys stage a rescue to save the youngest boy of the family. Once Y/N is rescued, tension in the family reaches new limits when they are forced to leave their home and seek refuge at the isolated islands where the Metkayina clans live.
Warning: Violence, blood, injuries, saving family, home abandonment, family arguments, etc.
This time, I’m going to make a few attempts with the Na’vi language, but no promises I won’t completely fuck up with it. I apologize in advance for this.
(Play this music during some of the scenes of you want, I thought it worked as it kinda sounds like it fits in. IDK about you guys, but that’s just me.)
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— Y/N POV
I silently wince as I come to from passing out Eywa only knows how long ago and try to clutch my head with my hand, but my hands are currently tied behind my back. I blink a few times to see what’s going on only to be meet face to face with the man who abducted me with the rest of his squad around the area patrolling or sitting down while they idly chat with one another. I quickly look around to see where an an old abandoned Sky-People base. I then hear the guy who abducted me from before start to speak to me.
Quaritch: Well, it’s about time you woke up, you little shit. How was your little nap?
He looks at me expectingly for me to speak up and I don’t give him the satisfaction of getting that response. I just look what him with a neutral look on my face as I raise one eyebrow as if to say I’m bored and over this shit right now.
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(This is what I had in mind for how Y/N’s face looks like right now.)
The Na’vi man gets pissed off at this and decided to try to get me to talk. He grabs my wounded shoulder from the bullet that luckily went all the through and dug his claws into the wound, making me grunt in pain and curse at him under my breath in the Na’vi language.
Y/N: Pxa Ngengeya. (I think I translated it to Screw you?, IDK, please correct if I’m wrong.)
Quaritch: What’s the matter? Daddy never teach you English? Don’t fuck around, kid. I know you know how to speak English.
Y/N: You got me there, asshole. Now, what the fuck is it that you want from me?!
Quaritch: Oh, it’s not you that I’m after. It’s your father. He stabbed the RDA in the back and his mate killed my human body. I’m here to enact my revenge and you’re the perfect bait for the job.
Y/N: Watch it there, jackass. There’s a few things you should know. One: Dad could not give a single fuck about me hence why I even came of here in the first place so you’re out of luck there already. Two: Even if you were to torture me to get me to talk, I ain’t telling any of you jackshit because I’m already used to pain like from my shoulder right now. I’m pretty sure the girl who I shot that is getting patched up over there knows what I mean from how it hurts to get shot…
Walker: Quaritch! Shut the kid up for me, will ya?
Quaritch, from what I heard my captors call him, looked at to his soldier, giving an unamused look and told Walker, from what I heard him call her, to shut her trap. He turned back yo me with said unamused before he backhanded me across the face. I feel the sting from the pain as my head recoiled from the slap force and I look back at him unimpressed as I continue to not give a single fuck about any of these guys. He looks at me a little impressed as I didn’t show signs of fear or pain for him to get satisfaction from.
Y/N: Was that it? Surely, you have something else.
Quaritch: Oh, there’s much worse to come, kid. Just you wait?
He chuckled before he started to punch me a few times before he spoke again while getting close to my face.
Quaritch: Well, you still want to try your luck again or do you want to cool your jets, kid?
I looked him square in eyes and spat out blood all over his face.
Y/N: Fuck off.
I knew all that did was piss him off before he had one of his soldiers come over to keep watch over me so I didn’t try anything stupid while he grabbed a cloth and wiped his face clean. Next thing I know, the soldier grabbed me by my braids again and pulled me off to a corner of the base, leaving me there as he went back to sitting in a chair as he watched me closely. Little did he know, I grabbed a knife from his pocket and started to slowly cut away at my ties until the straps around my wrists broke. I smirk at the guy as he looks at me in shock as I pull my now freed hands in front of me and toss his knife onto the floor in front of him. I lay out comfortably and then rub my wounded left shoulder with my right hand and I feel the bleeding starting to stop and see the blood that went down my left arm. I roll my eyes at the blood on my arm, knowing Dad is probably going to get pissed that I got myself hurt yet again and Mom will be worried like nobody’s business about the wound. I think back to my siblings and close my eyes, letting out a small prayer for their safety and open my eyes back up to be met face to face with a pistol aimed at me by the Quaritch guy from before.
Quaritch: How in the fuck did you get free?!
I look at him with disinterest and just point to his subordinate that only now picked up his loose knife.
Y/N: I figured I’d get comfy since I’m probably going to be here for a while.
Quaritch was now very pissed of and grabbed me by my wounded left shoulder before he dragged me into a medbay room that he had converted into a small cell to contain me. He threw me into the room before closing and locking the door, leaving me with a once again bleeding shoulder from him digging his claws into it. I get up to dust myself off and I just look at all of the Recom soldiers over my shoulder through the glass wall that allowed me to see them and vice versa. I just flip them all off before turning my back to them and start searching through all the drawers in the small cell for anything I can possibly use as medical for my shoulder. I managed to find some bandages in the cell and wrapped them tightly around my shoulder, the white bandage wrap immediately turning red as blood hits the bandages. I rolled my shoulder to make sure that the wrap was secure and it actually relieved me of some pain. I continued to search around and found an old smoke grenade that I can possibly use should the opportunity arise. I put it into a small bag I keep hidden on my person before concluding my search of my cell.
I then remember something I had almost forgotten about something I had in my ear that I rarely use. I have an earpiece that I took from some skeleton that was strapped to some sort of weird mech suit I found in the middle of the Pandora jungle and modified it using tech I scavenged from Sky-people bases. I modded it enough to the point where I could fit said earpiece into my ear without any discomfort. Praying that my cell is soundproof, I put my finger to the earpiece and flip to an open frequency to try calling my brothers on their communicators.
Y/N: Hello? Hello? Can anyone on this frequency hear me?
Neteyam: Y/N?!? Is that actually you, brother?
Y/N: Yeah, it’s me.
Lo’ak: Holy shit! Are you alright?
Y/N: -sighs heavily before replying to my brothers- Yeah, for the most part apart from my shoulder hurting like a bitch from getting shot. Luckily, I found some bandages to wrap it for now until I can get it properly treated. I’m currently being held in a cell inside of some sort of old abandoned Sky-people base or some shit.
Neteyam: Y/N, I need to tell me who is it that is holding you prisoner.
Y/N: I think I overheard that name of the leader of this squad was—
Before I was able to finish my was that my earpiece was roughly taken from my ear by someone behind me, which caused me to let out a whimper of pain due to my ears being very sensitive unlike most Na’vi. I had turned around to see it was that Recom Na’vi that I had shot through the shoulder earlier.
Walker: Well, looks like we found out little rat trying to call for help.
Neteyam on the earpiece: Y/N? Y/N! Are you there?!
Lo’ak on the earpiece: Bro? Little brother?! Are you okay?!
Walker: You won’t be needing this anymore.
Walker, as I remember the Quaritch guy calling her, then turned the earpiece off and put it into her pocket before she grabbed me by my neck, slightly choking me.
Walker: You any other toys or shit you want to try with me?
Y/N: Oh, why don’t you go fuck yourself, you skxawng? (I’m pretty sure skxawng translates to idiot in the Na’vi language.. again, please correct me if I’m wrong.)
Walker got a bit mad at what I said and kneed me in the stomach before dropping me to the floor.
Walker: If it were up to me, you’d be dead and not being used as bait, you troubled useless fuckhead.
Y/N: Pxa Ngengeya. (Still not sure if this is screw you in the language.)
Walker walked out of the cell and closed the cell door. I silently gave her the middle finger before I went to the bed that was in the cell and laid down on it to get as comfy as I can during my time as a prisoner. My tail swished contently while my ears flattened against my head as I finally got comfortable on the patient bed. I remember that I had something in my pocket that I think could make me smile in this dark time. I put my hand into the small bag I put the smoke grenade into earlier and pull out a photo, something taken by what Dad had brought with him that he called a camera that was from his home planet, leaving the photo as the result of the camera.
I unfold the photo to see it was of me, Lo’ak, Neteyam, Kiri, and Tuk all riding Ikrans together when we were all younger. Neteyam had Tuk in front of him as Tuk flew with him on his Ikran. Kiri had me in front of her as I flew with her on her Ikran. This was before I had bonded with Ro’nea. Lo’ak was flying his own Ikran and was showing off when Dad took the photo of all of us together. I smile at the photo as it’s one of the few happy moments I can fondly look back at. I fold the photo back up and put it back into my bag. I then roll over onto my side when I grab my grandfather’s necklace and my songcord that were both nestled around my neck. I let out a prayer to Eywa for strength and comfort, letting down my walls to show I’m really just a broken kid that wants to just like my family and I can’t even find a place amongst my own family or clan. I let some tears silent fall down my face before I let go of my necklace and close my eyes as I begin to sing my songcord, which does not have many beads on it. The five beads represent my five biggest life milestones, the first bead representing when Tuk was born, the second bead representing my first ever lone hunt with a kill on a sturmbeest, the third bead representing when I found my secret location of the lake, the fourth bead representing the success I’ve had with my self training, and the fifth and final bead representing when I bonded with Ro’nea. I finish singing, letting my mind drift off without my noticing that the Quaritch guy came into myself. I was ripped out of my thoughts when he grabbed me by my braids this time and pulled me out of the cell with an evil grin on his face.
— Elsewhere with the Sully siblings, 3RD PERSON POV —
We can currently see Neteyam running to where he knew Lo’ak, Kiri, and Tuk were now hiding at. He is currently having many thoughts going through his head about Spider and his youngest brother, many of those thoughts involving rescue missions. He shakes his head to clear his head as he finally reaches the tree where his siblings were at. He sees Kiri, Lo’ak, and Tuk all sitting around a small fire Lo’ak has started. Neteyam reaches them and sits down between Tuk and Lo’ak as he breathes in and out very heavily from running.
Kiri: I’m glad to see that you’re alright, Neteyam.
Lo’ak: I’m glad you’re okay, bro.
Neteyam: Yeah….
Tuk looks around before she spoke up to her big siblings.
Tuk: Where’s Y/N at? I don’t see him with you, Nete.
Neteyam: Y/N’s in big trouble…..he was also taken by those same people that took Spider.
Lo’ak got extremely pissed at what he just learned.
Lo’ak: Goddamnit!!!
Lo’ak then slammed his hand down onto the log he was sitting on.
Lo’sk: Ow…
Tuk: No. No!!!
Tuk ran to Kiri who hugged her little sister.
Kiri: So. What now?
Neteyam: We need to think of something we can do to get our brother and our friend back. However, I managed to recover his bow, quiver of arrows, and his knife.
Right at that moment, Lo’ak and Neteyam’s communicators then went off as they received a surprise call.
Y/N: Hello? Hello? Can anyone in this frequency hear me?
Everyone’s heads perked up in shock of hearing their brother’s voice over the communicator.
Neteyam: Y/N?!? Is that actually you, brother?
Y/N: Yeah, it’s me.
Lo’ak: Holy shit! Are you alright?
Y/N: -sighs heavily before replying to my brothers- Yeah, for the most part apart from my shoulder hurting like a bitch from getting shot. Luckily, I found some bandages to wrap it for now until I can get it properly treated. I’m currently being held in a cell inside of some sort of old abandoned Sky-people base or some shit.
Neteyam: Y/N, I need to tell me who is it that is holding you prisoner.
Y/N: I think I overheard that name of the leader of this squad was—
The siblings then heard some static as well as a help of pain they knew came from their brother before they heard an unknown voice.
Walker: Well, looks like we found out little rat trying to call for help.
Neteyam: Y/N? Y/N! Are you there?!
Lo’ak: Bro? Little brother?! Are you okay?!
Walker: You won’t be needing this anymore.
The call was then cut off as the earpiece was shut off.
Neteyam: Y/N? Y/N?!? Dammit!!
Kiri: So what now?
Neteyam: I hate to say it, but we’ll have to go home and tell Dad and Mom what happened.
Lo’ak: No kidding, especially with all the shit going on.
Kiri: Well, it’s getting close to Eclipse. We better get going.
The siblings call long and loudly for their Ikrans when they notice something strange. The fully white Ikran they saw their brother riding fly over to them before landing next to their own Ikrans. They fully saw what Ro’nea looked like up close: the red scar across her yellow left eye that is visible against her white skin, the harness and saddle on her from her rider, Y/N, the holder for Y/N’s bow and arrows, and how much bigger she is compared to the average Ikran like their own. All the siblings were amazed at the sight of a white Ikran before them considering just how rare it was see one and even rarer to be able to bond with one.
Neteyam: I’ll be damned…
Kiri: I never thought I’d ever see a white Ikran up close before.
Kiri went up to her Ikran and told her to head off home before her Ikran took off. Kiri then went towards Ro’nea’s underside and gently scratched her on the neck as Ro’nea lets out a whimper like she was missing something before looking at the Sully children. Kiri reads the beast’s body language and concludes that Ro’nea is worried about her rider just as much as the Sullys were worried about Y/N, proving the bond that Y/N and Ro’nea share is special. She goes around to Ro’nea’s front and puts her hand onto the Ikran’s snout/nose before rubbing the Ikran’s muzzle.
Kiri: I understand your pain, you’re just as worried about him as we are. I promise you that we will get him back.
Ro’nea understood what Kiri just said to her and allowed Kiri to step onto her to ride home. Tuk follows Kiri onto Ro’nea and sits down in front of her big sister. Kiri lets Ro’nea take control as her brothers get onto their Ikrans. Ro’nea takes off and the boys follow suit as they take off. Kiri and Tuk both let Ro’nea lead the fly as she gracefully soars through the air.
— 30 minutes later at the Sully Home —
— Still 3RD PERSON POV
We see the Sully children finally descend to their home with their parents looking out of the window carved into the tree and come out at the sound of wings flapping as well as the sight of the white Ikran. They run out, hoping to see their youngest boy and are worried when they don’t see him anywhere.
Jake: Neteyam, Lo’ak! Where’s your brother?
Neteyam: I’m going to need you to hold on for a minute, Dad. We should have Tuk go inside due to the nature of the situation me and Lo’ak need to discuss with you and Mom.
Kiri: I got it. Tuk, come on, let’s go get some sleep.
Tuk: I just hope that Y/N is back and okay in the morning… -she rubs her eyes tiredly-
Neytiri gives a suspicious look to her youngest child as Tuk let that sentence slip out of her mouth.
Kiri: Don’t worry, Tuk, he’ll be okay, I promise.
Kiri manages to get Tuk inside before Tuk climbed into Y/N’s hammock for comfort to sleep better and fell asleep almost instantaneously. Kiri came back out to talk with everyone.
Krir: She’s asleep, now, let’s get back to it.
Jake: So what the hell happened?
Neytiri: Where is your brother?
Neteyam: He was ta—
At that moment, Jake’s communicator came to life with an incoming call from an unknown source. Jake looked at his sons and daughter in curiosity as they had grim looks on their faces frim what he could tell. He answered the call to hear an all too familiar voice coming in.
Quaritch: Jake Sully. You remember me? Your old commander?
Jake’s fears came to light as he immediately knew who it was that was on the other end of his communications call, a horrified look immediately coming to his face as his blood ran cold. He prayed to Eywa that his now worst fear was not what he thought as he continued to listen to the call.
Quaritch: I have something that belongs to you. Perhaps you recognize these sounds.
Loud screams of pain could then be heard over the loud sound of something electrical sounding. Jake assuming it was some sort of taser that was making the electrical noise and he knew instantly who was making the screams.
Quaritch: That’s right, we have your son. If you want him and your human friend bacj, you need to hand yourself over to us in return for the boy. I expect to see you tomorrow morning at an abandoned base, you try anything funny, your boy is a goner. Make your choice by tomorrow. Goodbye.
Quaritch hangs up the call and Jake is left speechless for the first time in ages. Neytiri has tears coming to her eyes at the sound of her son being tortured by the Recoms. Neteyam, Kiri, and Lo’ak all worry about what is happening with their little brother.
Jake: Shit……
Neytiri: We need to get our son back!
Jake: We’ll get moving in the morning. Everyone, to bed now.
Neytiri: Jake, we need to talk.
Jake: Alright. Kids, head in to bed.
The Sully children go inside their home, leaving their parents alone outside.
Neytiri: What are we going to do?
Neytiri starts to break down at the reality of her son being in great danger at the hands of one of her worst adversaries. Jake shuddered at the thought of his son in danger at the hands of Quaritch.
Jake: I don’t know yet. But I promise you, Ney, we will get our son back.
The two then hug before Jake spoke up again.
Jake: Let’s get some sleep and come up with a plan at dawn.
They head back inside the home.
— Later the next day, with Y/N —
— Y/N POV
I tiredly rub my ribs in pain from earlier due to being kept up all night while being tortured by my captors. Being tased, beaten with a baton multiple times, kicked in the ribs, you get the idea. I’m just happy I’m used to any and all sorts of pain from my years of training myself. I lay back on my cell floor to let myself rest and I then hear the cell door open. I sigh and look to see Walker there, pointing her rifle at me.
Walker: Get up. NOW!
Y/N: Fuck you too.
I get up slowly before Walker gets behind me and puts the barrel of her gun to the back of my head.
Walker: Move. Now.
Y/N: Alright, alright. -Under his breath: Fucking pricks can’t seem to lay off for five fucking minutes-
I walked out the cell to see all the Recom soldiers geared up and ready to leave.
Walker: Here he is, boss.
Quaritch turned to our direction and smiled smugly. Man, I wanted to wipe that grin off his face, but I need to bide my time for now until I can find a chance to escape. I saw Quaritch still had my earpiece with him as he held it in his hand and he then turned away to address his squad.
Quaritch: EVERYBODY LISTEN UP!!! We have approximately twenty minutes until the targets get here. I want two teams of two hiding for an ambush. Get ready for anything to happen! All clear?
Recoms: Yes sir!!
Quaritch: Good! Now, get to positions!!!
I watched as the soldiers got into their positions when I saw Quaritch turn back to me until I saw something out of the corner of my eye. I squinted at the tree line and saw that it was Mom and Dad with some members of my clan. I smirk mentally because I know these guys are fucked. I look back at Quaritch to only have Walker grab me by my braids and drag me to where Quaritch wanted me at. I kick her in the gut to get her off me before Mansk and Sean Fike pointed their guns at me as Walker got back from me kicking her. I glared back at them as I sat down where Quaritch wanted me at and I calm and coldly replied to then.
Y/N: Oh fuck off. I only did so she would stop being a major bitch. I already shot her in the shoulder and I thought that would get the idea of fucking with me through her head, but it apparently didn’t.
I then flipped the two off before I went back to not giving a fuck to any of these Recom guys. I turn again to where I last saw Mom and Dad to see Mom looking at me with a look of shock at what she overheard me say about handling a gun and looked worried when her eyes landed on my shoulder that has the bloody bandage wrap around it. while Dad just had a look of “You’re going to be in trouble when we’re back home, Soldier”. I roll my eyes at Dad’s look and just wait. I did see Mom pull an arrow and ready it on her bow, waiting for an opportunity to strike. I say a small prayer to hopefully gauge a react from one of these guys to give Mom a clean shot at one of them and it works way too well.
Sean Fike: Hey! You better shut up before I—
I smile as I saw the arrow from Mom’s bow fly and make its new home in Sean Fike’s head, killing him with everyone looking around frantically as they watched their friend die. I quickly take the opportunity to grab the smoke grenade from my bag and pulled the pin.
Y/N: Sorry to do this to you asshats, but I have no part in this bullshit.
I drop the grenade to the ground as the area quickly enveloped in smoke and I run, grabbing a pistol from Fike’s dead body as I ran.
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(The pistol)
I managed to make it far enough away from the base that I knew I would be safe for the most part, but I was then tackled from behind, knocking me to the ground. I fight against the person’s grip on my neck to strangle me from behind and I managed to roll onto my back, allowing me to see my attacker who was Walker as he continued to strangle me. I first felt pain right in my right arm as I knew my arm became dislocated at the shoulder from when she knocked me down. I soon felt my breath starting to fade as I try to quickly think of a way to free myself, I remember the pistol, but it was knocked away from me. I decide to fight dirty and spit into Walker’s face before I punched her across the face. I got up and ran over to where the pistol was before I grabbed it with my left hand, my non-dominant hand, and shot Walker through the shoulder again which knocked her down to the ground. I ran over to her and started to hit her over the head with the pistol until she was not moving. I got up, realizing I actually killed Walker and closed my eyes. I then let out many deep breathes as I catch my breath and was about to turn my attention to my dislocated right arm when I heard a very familiar voice shout out to me.
Neteyam: Y/N!!
I looked to see my both of my brothers coming my way with them both giving me death grip hugs, afraid I might disappear from in front of them. They only let go when they heard me groan in pain from everything my body has gone through in the last hours. They are horrified at the shape of my body covered with blood stains, wounds, burns, and bruises.
Lo’ak: Holy shit, bro! Are you good?
Y/N: It could be worse. It’s definite not as bad as her.
I point to the body of Walker who I had just killed without realizing. Both of my brothers look to where I pointed and saw the corpse of the Recom before their eyes widened at the sight of my handiwork.
Neteyam: Holy hell! Remind to me never piss you off, little brother.
Lo’ak: Fucking hell, bro.
Y/N: Back to matters, what the hell are you guys doing here?
Neteyam: Mom and Dad wanted us to get you out of here while they distracted the Recoms that took you prisoner.
Y/N: Hold that thought. Someone is coming.
Without looking, I pointed my left hand with pistol still in hand and fired five rounds off in the direction of the rustling I heard. I then hear the sound of bullets hitting flesh before the loud thump of a body hitting the floor. I turn to see I successfully gunned down another Recom soldier, I think this one was named Warren, but I could not care about that. I shot his body one more time with a bullet in between the eyes and spat on his corpse.
Y/N: Fuck you.
Neteyam and Lo’ak both watched as I grabbed three extra mags and an extra holster from Warren’s body. I got back up from kneeling and fit the holster to my leg before I place my now new pistol into said holster. I went back over to where my brothers are when Neteyam just noticed how badly positioned my right arm was.
Neteyam: Y/N! Your arm!
Y/N: I almost forgot about that. Do either of you have a knife or something I can use?
Lo’ak: Here.
Lo’ak hands me a blade that I recognize to be my knife and I nod to him. I place the blade of my knife into my mouth before I bit down onto it. I grip my right wrist with my left hand before breathing out heavily and swiftly pull my arm down, realigning the set and getting my arm back into place. There was a crack at this sound which made Neteyam and Lo’ak a small bit disgusted. I just grunt loudly at the quick pain and bit down a bit harder onto my knife before the pain fades. I take my knife out of my mouth and sheathe it away into its sheathe. I roll my right shoulder without any pain and squeeze my hand.
Neteyam: I’ll never understand how you can go through so much body punishment without much pain.
Y/N: You get used to it. Take a look at my shoulder for example.
Lo’ak only now noticed the bloody bandage wrap around my left shoulder and winced.
Lo’ak: Dude! Oh, before I forget.
Lo’ak hands me my bow and quiver of arrow. I attach my quiver to my back and sling my bow onto the catch, securing it to the quiver.
Y/N: Enough chatter, what’s the play?
Neteyam: We need to reach our Ikrans quickly.
Y/N: Lead the way.
We start running to where Lo’ak and Neteyam had their Ikrans near the edge of a high up cliff over looking the ocean. It was only then that some Recom soldiers caught up with us and started shooting at us. Lo’ak and Neteyam quickly get onto their Ikrans and started flying over the edge when Neteyam shouted to me.
Neteyam: Come on, man! Grab my hand!
Y/N: There’s no time! Go! Get out of here! I’ll be fine!
Lo’ak: We’re not leaving you again! Come on!
Y/N: FUCK IT!
I run to the edge and jump off the cliff when I whistle long and loud for Ro’nea, praying that she is nearby. Lo’ak had started flying down to catch me when a blur of white swiftly flew past them and fly underneath me. I land on the blue to reveal it was Ro’nea. I climb into her saddle and connect my queue to Ro’nea’s queue, allowing us to bond once again. Neteyam and Lo’ak look at the two of us in shock at how much trust there is between me and Ro’nea to where I will do blind jumps to call for Ro’nea with her coming right away. I looked at them as they saw me with the much bigger white Ikran. I nod to them before I let Ro’nea take control and take me home.
— 3 hours later, at the Sully Hometree —
— Y/N POV
I grab a bowl of medicine that my grandmother had left for me to use. My brothers were currently out doing things for the clan as Kiri and Tuk were helping me change the bandages around my shoulder and patch up the rest of my body. I tear off the bloody bandages from scoop some of the medicine out of the bowl and place some of it into the hole ripped into my left shoulder. Kiri passed me clean leaf bandages and Tuk helps me wrap it up. I roll my left shoulder and sigh at the relief I feel on the pain. I scoop out some more medicine and rub it over my chest before I feel the medical effects of the medicine relief pain from my chest. I thank my sisters for the help before I get up and start walking towards the entrance of our Hometree.
Kiri: Y/N, just be careful, okay?
Y/N: Of course, sis.
I start to climb down the tree and walk a small distance to where I saw Ro’nea lounging around near a small river. She perked up at the sight of seeing me and gave me a look saying “I’m happy you’re okay, friend. I smiled at her as I continued over to where she was at and sat down next to her as Ro’nea laid down next to me, wrapping one of her wings around me. I got comfy next to her while it starts raining and I suddenly feel the exhaustion from everything in the last day and a half hit me hard. From the pain in my leg to getting shot in the shoulder to being tortured for a whole night. I’m just happy that Ro’nea’s wing keeps me cover from the rain due to her being much bigger she is than most Ikrans. Ro’nea pulled me closer to her using her wing and I fell right to sleep as Ro’nea kept me company. Little did I know that my parents were looking for me before they saw me asleep cuddled up to Ro’nea.
— 3RD PERSON POV
Jake and Neytiri arrived after making sure the Recoms won’t be back soon, but Jake knew they would come back more dangerous than ever. Jake knew they would need to leave their home.they arrived home with their oldest sons in tow landing behind them. They all went into the tree in search of the young Sully boy with no sight of him anywhere inside. Nobody was there apart from Kiri playing with Tuk.
Jake: Kiri. Where’s your brother?
Kiri: He went down to the river a little bit down from the Tree.
Neytiri: Let’s go find him.
Jake: -sighs loudly with pinching his nose- Of course, he is….let’s go.
Jake and Neytiri jump down from branch to branch before they get to the ground and make their way to where they know their son likes to relax at as it starts raining.
Neytiri: I just hope Y/N is okay.
Jake: He will be. But I’m going to need to have words with him in the morning.
The two finally reach the river where they see the massive white Ikran that they knew was their son’s and went over to Ro’nea. They saw Ro’nea turn to them before she growled and screeched at them when she saw them, revealing Y/N being asleep next to her as she kept her left wing around her rider. Both Neytiri and Jake were shocked at this behavior and Neytiri slowly approached Ro’nea, letting the Ikran study her movements before she got close enough to Ro’nea that she was able to rub her head.
Neytir: Sssshhhh. Ssssshhhh, it’s okay. We mean no harm.
Ro’nea calmed down at this and knew that the two meant no trouble. She let the two get closer to her snd Y/N while Jake slowly picked up his son bridal style. Neytiri rubbed Ro’nea’s head as she was happy that her son to pass the Iknimaya trial with obtaining such a beautiful and special Ikran, but she regrets never being there for son when he had to do it in secret. Jake looks at Ro’nea in admiration of the special bond she shares with his son and he also feels the guilt and regret for not being there for his son more than he ever was. Jake carried his sleeping son to the Hometree and brought him inside. Neytiri finished rubbing Ro’nea’s head and start to go where Jake when to when she heard Ro’nea screech at her. Turning around, Neytiri saw Ro’nea give her a look saying “You need to think about him as well” before she took off to where she would go until Y/N needs her again. Neytiri made her way back to the Hometree where she saw something that made her heart melt. She saw Jake in their hammock with Y/N sleeping soundly on his chest like he used to when he was much younger. She walked over and climbed in next to Jake as the two held their youngest son with thoughts about how they failed him throughout his life before they drifted off to sleep.
— the next day —
— Y/N POV
I felt oddly at peace as I came back to the world of the awake from my land of dreams. I got up to only see I was in Mom and Dad’s hammock alone with everyone else sitting around a table with serious looks on their faces. Tuk saw that I was up as I rubbed my eyes in exhaustion from still being exhausted and she got excited.
Tuk: Y/N is awake!
Everyone looked towards me as I got out of the hammock. I look at them confused and worry that I’m in massive trouble.
Y/N: What the hell is going on?
Neytiri: First off, watch your mouth….secondly, please take a seat.
I shrug and take the remaining open seat between Kiri and Tuk.
Jake: So. Because of what happened with Spider being captured by the RDA, unfortunately, we need to exile ourselves from the Otamikaya clan and flee to the eastern seaboards of Pandora. We can’t risk him giving up where we are. I know of another clan of Na’vi that are out there. They go by the Metkayina.
I was shocked to hear this as was everyone else. But I understood where Dad was going at with the situation.
Kiri: There’s no way Spider will tell them anything.
Jake: Kiri, we can’t leave anything to chance. This is the only way for the safety of the family. I want everyone to get ready with your things in twenty minutes. Now, go get ready.
I noticed Tuk start to look like she was going to cry so I got up and went over to her before I gave her a big hug. She hugged me back as she started to cry a bit and I picked her up before bringing her outside so she can calm down. I bounce her on my hip while I hold her because I know it helps soothe her. I managed to get her to settle down before she asked to be let down. I let her down and get down onto one knee.
Tuk: I don’t want to leave….
Y/N: Oh Tuk….I know how you feel, but it’s what Dad thinks will be best for us all.
Tuk: I know….
Y/N: How about this: I’ll help you pack up your things and if you’re okay by the time we leave, you can ride with me on Ro’nea.
Tuk looked at me a bit confused.
Tuk: Who’s Ro’nea?
Y/N: My special white Ikran. You can ride on her with me if you’re okay by the time we leave, does that sound like a plan to you, Tuk?
Tuk: Yes!!
I smile at her as she grins back at me and I grab her small hand.
Y/N: Come on, let’s get your things together.
Tuk eagerly pulls me by my hand to go back inside as we get her things together. I’m just happy that the only things I’ll need to grab is my knife and my journal, Ro’nea has my bow and quiver with her.
— 20 minutes later —
— still Y/N POV
I finished getting Tuk’s things together before I brought her bag over to dad’s Ikran and tied it to Bob’s saddle. I went back inside the Hometree for the last time and grab my journal from my old pillow before I place it into my small hidden bag and then grab my new pistol. I place it into the holster I took from Warren and out the three extra mags I took from him as well into my small bag. I then walk back out to see everyone else is ready to go when Kiri and Mom call for me and Tuk.
Neytiri: Come on, Y/N, you’re riding with me. Tuk, you’re with your sister.
Kiri: Come on, Tuk.
Y/N: I got it, Mom. Give me a minute.
I whistle long and loudly as I run towards the edge of the branches and jump off, freefalling like before when Ro’nea catches me like just like she always does. She lifts me up to where I can see my family and they stare at me in silent thought. Kiri has a surprised look on her face from my little stunt while my brothers look at me impressed and my parents look at me with odd looks on their faces. Ro’nea gently lands and Tuk is very excited when she ran over to us.
Y/N: Tuk, so I need you to be careful climbing onto Ro’nea, okay?
Tuk: Okay.
I help Tuk onto Ro’nea and help her get settled. Once that’s done, I look over to Dad who is looking at me impressed. I shake my head at him and connect my queue to Ro’nea’s queue. It only dawned onto my family that I have so much trust with Ro’nea and vice versa, that I sometimes don’t even connect my queue to allow Ro’nea to have full control of flying. Dad pulls himself out of his stupor before he got onto Bob and we all took off.
After many hours of flying, it turned to night as my family and I all flew across the vast sea. I looked down to see Tuk asleep in front of me. I smiled at this sight and made sure she was comfortable as we continued to fly to wherever we were going. I then started to mindlessly sing a small song I had made in regards to myself, not noticing that my family was watching me sing to myself.
Y/N:
No place to belong….
Countless times I’ve ran…
Countless number of wrongs….
Go to where it began….
I have no proper place…
I’m a lone kid…
I’m nothing, but a disgrace…
Eywa amid…..
I’m always ignored…
I’m treated as a failure…
The many punishments I’ve endured….
For the many times I dive head first into danger…
I always end up red and beaten…
It’s hard when you don’t have a single friend…
No way to remain unbeaten…
I’m just Useless and Troubled until the end.
— 3RD PERSON POV
Y/N’s family looked at him as he sang his small song. Neteyam and Lo’ak looked at their little brother in silence, not sure of what to think at how their brother views himself. Kiri just wished she paid more attention to how her little brother felt and saw himself. She really wished she could give him a hug right now and tell him it’ll be alright. Neytiri looked at Y/N in sorrow as she knew her son was broken and wanted to scoop him up to tell him everything will be better. Jake looked at him with many thoughts going through his head, knowing he failed in raising his youngest boy the right way and he failed him as a father.
— the next day —
— Y/N POV
After flying for many hours, I finally saw the big islands that was the home of the Metkayina clan. I saw many of the clan members coming to the beach as we land our Ikrans. They look at Ro’nea the longest as she’s probably the first white Ikran they’ve ever seen. I rub her head and she wraps a wing around me. The leader and tsahìk of the clan push their way through the crowd until the two reach the front where my family and I are staying.
???: Who are you?
Jake: My name is Jake Sully and my mate, Neytiri, and this is our family.
??: Why are you here?
Neytiri: War has been brought upon our people and we needed to find refuge for our family away from the war. We just want our family to be safe.
???: Well, allow us to introduce ourselves. I’m Tonowari and this is my wife, Ronal. I’m the leader of this clan,
Tonowari reluctantly smiled at all of us with made me feel a bit better. However, when I turned my back to scratch Ro’nea on her neck, I saw Ronal, out the corner of my eye, look at my family apprehensively before she glared at me. I saw her look all over my body at my many bruises, cuts, and the bandage wrap around my shoulder, probably disgusted at the shape of my body from the events of the other day. I then saw her glance at my hand which has five fingers in comparison tho the normal four fingers of typical Na’vi. I get a bit concerned about this and Kiri notices my odd look before coming over to me with her grabbing my hand and squeezing it. I gave her a silent thank you with a nod of my head before Ronal came over and grabbed both my wrist and Kiri’s wrist, holding our hands up.
Ronal: They have demon blood in them! How can we be sure that war won’t come here?!
The clan members all started talking amongst one another and then turned back to us when I roughly pulled my hand away from Ronal and glared at her before I hissed.
Y/N: Don’t even try to touch me like that ever again!
Ronal glared down at me while I returned the gesture with everyone else watching the exchange in stunned silence before Dad pushed me behind him with Kiri getting in front of me protectively while Ro’nea wrapped her wing around me protectively. Kiri and Ro’nea have always been the ones to be the most protective of me.
Jake: Forgive my son. He’s just trying to understand everything that’s happening.
Y/N; Dad! Don’t apolog—
I was cut off when I saw Dad glare at me to shut ny trap. I roll my eyes at this and just look back to the ocean.
Tonowari: I shall grant your family uturu. But, you need to learn the ways of my people to not be a burden on the rest of the clan. Can you do that?
Jake: Of course.
Tonowari: Good. Follow me.
Toni started to led my family away as I told Ro’nea to stay put. I glared one more time at Ronal while she glared back at me while I followed my family, being the last person following. Tonowari led us to what he called a “Marui”, a home for us to have. He let us in and told us that his children will show us the ropes tomorrow morning while he and Ronal showed Dad and Mom what to do. He then said that he hopes we enjoy our new refuge home and that we will settle in quickly. I wave him down and I got his attention.
Y/N: Excuse me, sir? Could I talk to you for a minute outside please.
Tonowari: Oh, please call me Tonowari. What’s the problem, son?
The two of us move away to where my family can not hear us.
Y/N: Do you know of any places where I could go for some peace and quiet to enjoy nature? I want to find a place I can relax at with my sister as we both love nature.
Tonowari: There’s plenty of locations around here. There’s a very beautiful underwater cave near where the Spirit Tree is. There is also a beautiful lake with a small cave located more inland if there’s something you’re looking for.
Y/N: Thank you, Olo'eyktan. (I think that is Na’vi for clan leader.)
Tonowari: Of course, my boy. I hope you and your family get settled in. I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow. I wish you a good night.
Y/N: I’ll see you then, I hope you have a good night as well, Olo'eyktan.
I reach out my arm for a handshake and he returns it with a forearm handshake as we both mood to each other.
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(This is what I meant by forearm handshake)
I walk back to the marui to see my family. I see Kiri looking a bit unhappy at everything with Tuk trying not to be upset with everything going on and my brothers both look miserable due to the changes. I just go off to one corner of the marui before I laid down on the floor and opened up my journal to write about everything going on in the last few days. I heard someone clear their throat and see Dad looking at me, clearly pissed off emit which I closed my journal.
Y/N: -sighs- What is it this time, Dad?
Jake: Outside now! We need to talk.
I roll my eyes and get off of the ground before I followed Dad outside.
Jake: What the hell was that with the Tsahìk?
Y/N: You really want to know?!? Once again, I was made to feel like I don’t have a fucking place to belong anywhere! Apparently you don’t see that at all!!
Jake: -sighs- You’re right. I’m sorry, Y/N. But we need to be careful with how we go about our stay here. We can’t be disrespecting the leaders at all.
Y/N: She should have thought twice before pissing me off when I’ve already go through enough shit in the last few days!
Jake: Y/N!!! We can’t risk being kicked out. This is our only chance for our family staying together.
Y/N: Whatever. You don’t even care about how I feel.
Jake: Y/N….
I just ran past him as I don’t care anymore. I get back it Ro’nea and give her a look she knows all too well from me. I hop onto her and she takes off as Dad was chasing after me. I look at him in anger and flip him off before I fly away with Ro’nea.
— 3RD PERSON POV
Jake started chasing after Y/N when he saw his son on his white Ikran. Jake tried to call for his son as Ro’nea started taking off only to be flipped of by his youngest son. Jake sighs and just walks back to the marui with everyone looking at the dock as Y/N flew away yet again to get away from his father. Neytiri went to her mate and hugged him.
Neytiri: He’s going through a lot right now. Give him some time.
Jake: I will. I just..I just want what’s best for him right now after we could have lost him when he was taken prisoner.
Kiri: I’ll go find him.
Kiri started to get up to go after her youngest brother only to have Jake tell her to not.
Jake: No need. Y/N just needs some time. Let’s get sleep in meantime.
All of the Sullys then got close to one another and started to drift to sleep. (Just look at the gif at the top of this post to se what I mean)
— 30 minutes later —
— Y/N POV
I finished my last flight of the night with Ro’nea before we landed back on the beach. I hugged her and thanked her for all the amazing times I had with her as she hugged me back. I told her that I wasn’t sure I would see her again to which Ro’nea gave me a look saying “I’m never going to abandon you”. I smile at her and I told her about the cave near the lake from my earlier conversation with Tonowari. She looked at me with glee that I managed to find her a home here on the island and she screeched at me, as if to say thank you. I told her to head out to the cave and to get some sleep. Ro’nea took off for the cave while I walked to my family’s new marui where I saw everyone asleep with one another cuddled up next to each other. I smile as the sight, but I don’t join them, I go off to a corner and curl myself into a ball as my tail curls up and my ears flatten against my head. I fall asleep almost immediately.
— 3RD PERSON POV —
Once Y/N fell asleep, his sisters then stirred awake at the noise he made without realizing. Kiri shakes her head at this and goes over to her youngest brother. Kiri wraps her arms around him and pulls him close so he won’t be sleeping alone. Tuk climbed and cuddled into her brother’s arms so he feels their love. Y/N unconsciously smiled at the love he is unknowingly getting from his favorite siblings.
To be continued……
Thats Pt. 3 of “Useless” and “Troubled” until the End. I’m very happy with how this turned out. I hope everyone else enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this. I still don’t understand what makes this story enjoyable, but I’m having fun with it. Anyways, I have some plans for Pt. 4 of this story saga. Who knows what might happen….
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dirtytransmasc · 1 year
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Just reading you about spider and agreeing he deserve better. Srsly my heartaches for him and everyone in the fandom painting him being a bad guy is too much like his gray character guys.
but what I notice from him he will never be truly accepted by the two species both humans and na'vi for the human's his to na'vi or (savage) and to the na'vi his the constantly reminder of what the human's did to their people and land and I cry for him for that. His just a kid who wants to be belonged and accepted but always getting rejected.
And what pisses me off is to those people who blamed spider for bringing the rda to the metkayina when in fact it was signal from norm and max got detected by the rda signal. And Jake also pissed me off saying that spider might betray them for telling where they are like sir that kid is literally a ride or die like did he ever think that the how dangerous humans are especially a military one those people will torture for info when like sir your was once a soldier you know how brutal they are? Did he not even think what will they do to spider a kid? Imagine if quaritch didn't step up that boy brain will melted off. So yes spider deserved better
spiders such a good kid, that like, yeah, by human nature he just wants to be accepted, but like, he so clearly tries to suppress it. like sure, he wears his hair like jake, paints blue stripes on himself, holds himself like they do, but we never see him actually try and force himself into their lives. he follows kiri and lo'ak around because they're his friends and they love him, but other then that, he tries to slink into the background and be useful. he doesn't want to be a burden, a reminder, one with the humans. he literally would do anything, sacrifice anything for the na'vi. he did one thing for himself (saving his father, who was one of the first, if not only adults to ever care about him in his entire life) after years of putting his wants and needs aside, and he gets absolutely shit on. like he's just a baby, who will never fit in anywhere, who "doesn't want" to fit in anywhere (cause 99% of humans suck and he doesn't want to hurt the na'vi anymore than he already does for existing.) and he's just hurting.
I think spider's gonna burn out by the end of these movies. not in the going villain or rouge sort of way, but I think we're definitely gonna see a breaking point where he's just done. cause it has to be so hard to keep going like that for years.
he's gotten kidnapped, tortured, dragged around by the rda, forced to watch brutal tulkun hunts and village raids, watched a sibling die to save him, gotten held at knife point by someone who should be like his mother, knowing she might kill him. he has given his all, and still just kept rolling with the punches like they didn't hurt. and still, everyone seems to expect the worst of him.
and that comment from jake, I took it two separate ways, but I guess they could both coexist;
he didn't trust spider to protect his family, despite the kids undying love and devotion for them, even after he was shown nothing but hate.
and/or
he knew they were going to break the poor kid and get what they wanted from him, no matter what it took.
I don't know which one makes me feel more sick. the thought that jake thought so lowly of spider, or the fact that he knowingly abandoned him to that fate. even if jake wasn't the kids guardian, he could have at least given enough of a shit to feign worrying about him, or mourning spider capture. I understand having to make harsh decisions like valuing the life of many over one (doesn't make it anymore palatable, but y'know, military politics) but like, he didn't give a single shit. that's what bothered me the most. they just forgot about the kid.
with what james cameron has said, I think things are going to start sorta looking up for our boy, but I don't have the most hope he's gonna get a truly 'happy' ending. I think so much damage has been done already, that spiders always gonna be that character that breaks my heart.
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naavispider · 1 year
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if you could sum up, caught in only 1 k words, what would you say?
1k words 💀💀💀 Okay here's your essay:
Caught is a story focusing on Spider's inner conflict when confronted with harsh realities. It is a test of strength, loyalty, bravery and heart.
Quaritch captured spider at a much later point in the movie, after he's had time to adapt to his body and worldview without interference from someone who feels like family. As a result, he is harsher, meaner and far more deadly than both canon!recom!Quaritch and his former human self. When he first captures Spider, he goes in hard with the torture and neglect.
Spider is completely defiant because everything he knew about Quaritch is turning out to be true. He 'knows' that Quaritch is trying to lie to him about Jake Sully and the colonisation of Pandora. As a result, he resists, and suffers for it. After this continued treatment, he begins to say what he thinks Quaritch wants, only to pacify him so he stops being hurt. He still knows himself. He believes in Jake, he loves his siblings, he's only acquiescing to save himself. Quaritch sees this but isn't worried - he knows it's only a matter of time.
Eventually, Spider earns himself enough better treatment to actually feel grateful (how can you not?) and likes what he gets. So it continues, with Spider saying whatever Quaritch wants, though the two of them both know Spider doesn't mean it.
At this point, Quaritch goes low and uses morsels of (fake) fatherly attention to confuse Spider. He also starts to talk to him sensibly, using military psychology techniques to bend and twist Spider's mind instead of just torturing him into submission. This is what gets Spider to start to see things Quaritch's way. It was challenging but so interesting to write.
After a while, Spider starts to doubt himself and his beliefs due to these softer tactics. Quaritch can see this and begins to train Spider as an RDA soldier, with Spider having little choice but to go along with it. The longer he is there, the more he adapts and the more Quaritch trusts him. Towards the end, Spider grows closer and closer to the RDA's beliefs, and finally snaps when he mercy kills a Na'vi prisoner. From this point on, he loses himself and becomes an RDA robot, essentially, having abandoned his senses after months of psychological and emotional manipulation.
Thankfully, two moles working within the RDA who are in contact with Jake manage to cobble together a plan to extract him from Bridgehead, under the guise of a supply mission. Spider is none the wiser, and when he is finally brought back to High Camp he's angry and panicked. He's also confused. He doesn't know what he believes, he doesn't know what he should believe.
Jake managed to tentatively calm him down, and after a while Spider stops thinking he needs to escape/kill Jake. Once surrounded by his old home, and all the memories that it holds, he comes back around to his old self. This is helped by Chacon, one of the moles who helped him escape. There is a lot of psychological damage that needs to be repaired, and Spider might not ever be completely back to normal, but he grows to see what Quaritch did to him in the proper light, and regards it as what it is - abuse.
The themes I was exploring were mainly psychological. The story is completely told in Spider's POV - only once switching to a mole and then Neteyam for the other side of Spider's rescue mission. I did this deliberately because I never wanted the reader to know what Quaritch was thinking. This made everything much tenser and scarier. After all, Spider doesn't know what's going on, so why should we? It's about not knowing what to do in the face of someone trying to confuse you, so just doing your best to survive (hopefully with the least amount of emotional scarring you can get away with). That is why Spider acts the way he does - I think we can all sympathise with him. He is a strong and fierce sixteen year old, but he is still only sixteen, and his brain is still growing and developing. For that reason, his experience will affect him for the rest of his life, and he may have moments when he dissociates/regresses (commonly at first, but rarely after a while). His experience feels like three separate lives. His life before Quaritch, his life with Quaritch, and his life after Quaritch. They're all completely compartmentalised in his brain, and he's doing his utmost to try and merge life 1 and life 3 back together again. Kiri and Lo'ak are there to make sure he does, and Spider returns back to his old, happy self remarkably soon after the ordeal. He is the definition of resilient, after all.
There are of course unanswered questions and lingering uncertainties, most importantly the question of whether or not Jake was actually a responsible adult figure in Spider's life. Spider has to work out those answers by himself over the next few years, and somehow come to terms with the fact that if it was any of his siblings that were kidnapped, they probably would have been rescued a lot sooner.
However, Spider is at peace, and that is what counts for now.
It is a story about being resolute, about not letting your will break, about family, friendship and trust. And now I am literally rambling absolute horseshite oops. I managed to fit it all inside 1000 words, so I'll stop there! Thank you so much for asking!
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