#while takasugi is frankly a vengeful ghost or a sacred scapegoat in his best moments | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

agroupofcrows · 3 years ago

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# 'if you spend too much time ruminating and nitpicking yourself your body will become an empty room' and anyway i didn't need that #give someone too much time alone to think and they will hollow themselves out until they exist more like an idea than a person #a void (utsuro) where the self should be #he wears costumes and disguises and roles because he has no fixed self except that he is always stubbornly insisting that he does!!! #he can't escape being katsura in the same way utsuro couldn't escape living: no matter what he does he's stuck with this body this name #he props himself up on his ideals because that's what shouyo taught him to do to escape the emptiness because that's what shouyo was doing #lofty motivations as a long and winding path towards self actualization #at least until gintoki manages to ground them both in the present just by being himself #what made utsuro so violent wasn't the maliciousness of others it was the loneliness #and what made yoshida shouyo kind wasn't the idea of being human it was connection with others #and having zura say that thesis in FS with his 'at the end of the day we all just want to die with those we love' is SO POWERFUL #because zura is a perfect echo of that #tl;dr if gintoki is a monster that learns to be human zura is a human that learns to be human #(and i guess you can argue that takasugi is a human who learns to be a monster but can't escape his humanity (via op)

once again i am Thinking about zura and gintama the final and the loneliness of always living just so slightly outside of yourself. katsura kotarou depersonalization/derealization king.

#so many thought-provoking points here #as i said he is a sheet ghost like elisabeth #there *is* something under the sheet but it's not existing in this plane of reality #also ''at the end of the day we just want to die with those we love'' still sounds like giving up on living to me #no different from wanting to ''die a beautiful death'' a decade before #he finally said he doesn't want to die alone congratulations its so interesting how lonely people dont really have plans about their lives #but very clear ideals re their deaths. put this beside gintoki's ''i dont fight for the manju on my grave but for tomorrows breakfast''#and there it is #all of this lines up with his ascetic tendencies as well #i mean zura's asceticism #keeping himself transparent. keeping the body and the soul apart. no taste for life #so important to take a look at what they eat.#tatsuma throws up #takasugi doesn't eat. period #zura eats crumbs of bland food #gintoki eats sweets #i love them really #gintameta #about monsters and humans and emptiness well #i think zura is the only one who genuinely wants to stay alive #gintoki was alive like a curse and later like a testament. shoyo's will #personified because personhood is the highest form of existence #while takasugi is frankly a vengeful ghost or a sacred scapegoat in his best moments #but zura stayed alive for his ideals. that's why shoyo doesn't have a memorable speech for him. he is simply the eminent student. the logos #but he needs to be human to be whole just like takasugi #they are such a good three-legged stool ahjhkhgdj #i am open to criticism btw this was just some quick brainstorming #...edited bc stupid parentheses are ruining my life srry

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