#while accidentally breaking the stress ball I literally got only a few hours ago

[timberpen]

So I might actually do this so here is what I got so far for the Horror Writer SAGAU

The idea is that said horror writer is isekaied into Tavyat. Their works and WIP were previously appearing in various parts of Tavyat in the form of books. It is heavily debated in Tavyat wether these books are warnings, documentation of past events or a testimony of events that are currently going on in their current world. An example of how much this effects Tavyat is that the Creepypasta fanfic they wrote when they were 12 has caused those that believe it to be a warning/past events have been calling for forested areas to be heavily patrolled and that their nation’s children show not be allowed to enter such places alone vision holder or not for fear that the SlenderMan taking them. A few weeks before the creator decends an imposter showed up. The imposter is cruel and threatens to release the horrors in the stories on Tavyat as a whole if they do not obey their creator’s every order. One of those orders is to destroy anyone that tries to impersonate The Creator. When the actual Creator arrives they are surprised to see the state of Tavyat. As they try to make their was to Mondstadt, they get chased down by Outrider Amber who manages to get a (thankfully) non-pyro infused shot in the shoulder of The Creator. You can imagine the shock she feels upon seeing this “imposter” bleeds (color to be determined). Amber realizes what is happening but knows they are currently in no shape to take down the real imposter. She gives The Creator a brief rundown on the situation and helps bring them somewhere safe to recover their strength which happens to be in Wolvendom. That is where they meet Razor and his Lupical that don’t trust the Imposter Creator. However when they find find the real Creator they can smell from their blood that they are the real Creator to which they immediately shelter them. (I’m a Razor main and he doesn’t get nearly enough recognition in this au.)

[leviiattacks]

ceo levi falling in love?

author note :: THIS WAS SM FUN TO WRITE?? levi in the modern world is just always enjoyable for me. anyways it’s just lots of shy ceo levi and secretary reader :-) as always requests are open feel free to stop by !! :D word count :: some how i got to 2.4k,,,, i promise it was an accident it doesn’t feel that long 

levi falls in love slowly. he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it until he looks at you one day during a company meeting and is unable to understand why he can’t take his eyes off you

usually he’s able to shift his focus away but he’s stuck in place despite his efforts to look away

the entire meeting is him occasionally humming his approval at all the proposals and prospective business plans being presented to him

when, truly he is NOT listening at all. he’s trying to figure out when the hell and why the hell he began to feel this way for you.

it gets to a point where he’s so distracted over it he ends the team meeting early

everyone in the room exchanges worried glances between each other.

mr ackerman, letting them leave early? that’s a first but HEY!! they’ll take it!!

as everyone disperses out of the room he’s sitting with his back hunched in his plush office chair when he then comes to the realization that he has no idea when he did fall for you,,,,, it just sorta happened????

well, you are basically around him 24/7 and help him with everything but, his newfound feelings still catch him by surprise

at first he’s scared. the feeling is odd and the way his chest tightens as he speaks to you doesn’t feel right at all.

“any specific type of tea for today?” you ask waiting for his response

the rope squeezes at his heart and he squirms around a little.

“u-um, the usual is just fine”

WHY DID HE TRIP OVER HIS WORDS...??

WHY...????

but AGAIN he ignores it, he knows it’s for the best if he doesn’t get emotionally involved with you.

for the record, levi’s definition of emotionally involved is dating you, he doesn’t know that despite not dating you he is very much still emotionally involved with you

he’s pretty good at hiding his feelings though and the fact he likes you goes unnoticed by literally everyone

well, it does stay that way for a little while

that is until someone else expresses interest in you.

it’s a normal friday evening but for some unknown reason he can’t stop himself from clenching his jaw when he walks past you and overhears jean the new head of marketing ask if you’re single

levi is stood behind you and turns to hand his chilling stare to jean who slowly notices. he looks like his knees are about to buckle. “?,&:£:& sorry for asking,,, i’ll...... get going......”

levi just grunts in annoyance glaring at him even as he scurries out the hallway.

you turn to look at him and happily smile “ahhh thank you, i didn’t know how to turn him down he just joined the team so you know, it was weird he asked that”

levi just nods and tells you to get back to work and he hears you squeak out a “yepyepyep!!!”

levi is also very in denial about the way he feels

one day it’ll be “yeah i like y/n” the next it’s “no i do not...that is literally SO stupid. me??? in love?? never.”

also, when you accidentally brush past his skin he can’t help but tense up slightly and look anywhere but where you’re touching him

one time you place a hand on his forehead to check on his temperature because you do not trust him to be honest about having a fever

the scent of your vanilla perfume it’s sweet and simple but it makes him feel incredibly shy for no reason at all

GOD.

he feels like a stupid flustered school boy

ALL THIS OVER SOME PERFUME??

the man can’t even handle looking you in the eye. he’s reading his paperwork acting as nonchalant as possible when he’s really just freaking out

is my forehead sweaty?

fuck, fuck, fuck how do i look up close?

his thoughts are so jumbled up he doesn’t know how to respond to you when you ask if he’s really doing okay

“your cheeks are bright red, maybe you do have a fever?” you’re frowning and rummaging through your bag hoping to find something to help his pounding headache

but all he’s doing as he sits at his desk is nervously opening and closing his pen by the lid

he can’t tell if his face is red because he’s ill or because he likes you

and it’s driving him CRAZY??

wait a second.

does he like you? or does he like-like you?? or does he lo- no he does not love you that is absurd

what really cements his feelings for you is the day he’s unable to reel his mouth back in.

he just starts rambling about everything that has been stressing him out recently

the new company merger, developing new product designs, reviewing humongous stacks of paperwork, attending all these long meetings

he is being driven to his breaking point and you stand there taking it all in

“hey, take the day off.” your soft voice cuts him off mid sentence and he looks at you like you just told him to curl up into a ball and die

take a day off???? he does not have the time to take a day off??

he assumes you’re frustrated by his behaviour and begins to apologize. “i’m sorry that was unprofessional i shouldn’t have don-”

“i’ll finish the paperwork. your next meeting is scheduled for tomorrow. it’s okay to take a breather.” you pick up the stack of documents and move to transfer them over to your desk

but levi is persistent.

he stands in your way and you look at him expecting him to step out

“there is no need for that.” his tone is firm but you’re still defiant

“it’s my job as your secretary to alleviate your workload.” you don’t even spare him a glance and he feels like he’s burdening you now

sure, you are his secretary but allowing you to complete all that work on your own is ludicrous

waltzing around him you beeline towards your desk but again he steps in your way interjecting your path

“lev-”

your face morphs into a mortified expression and you panic, you did not just call him by his first name AT WORK

“i mean,” [insert an anxious yet deliberate cough] “mr ackerman.”

“listen, i understand you’re very stressed sir but i’ll finish the work off so please rest up. you need to be refreshed for tomorrow’s company dinner with the investors.”

you’re pleading he takes your advice but all he can do is blink in confusion

you would do that for him???

are you really just diligent and caring or,,, does he maybe have a chance at asking you out?

but again as quick as the idea enters his head it leaves.

asking you out sounds absurd to him, you deserve way better than someone like him

levi is having another one of his jealous moments

you’ve latched yourself onto reiner braun’s arm at the company dinner and he turns away frustrated

you look really pretty

like,,, sUPER pretty

like,,, drop dead gorgeous

he clears his throat when you both make eye contact

you perk up a little and your hand raises to wave at him but levi is so horrible at interacting with you he ends up ignoring you completely...

the pit of fire in his stomach flares up when he hears reiner compliment you, he’s surprised you even accept it and thank him

now, levi is not annoyed because you don’t deserve the compliment.

no, no, no you deserve all the compliments under the sun as far as he’s concerned but what the hell does “you look way better than normal.” even mean??

he thinks you look pretty every day so he’s just a tad bit offended by it

and he only begins to realize he’s in too deep when he sees the way reiner is getting a little too handsy for his liking

he doesn’t interrupt by saying anything even though he really wants to, you seem to not mind reiner’s touch

so he won’t step in between that, it’s not even any of his business

but it certainly doesn’t stop his displeasure from being blatantly obvious and displayed on his face

“ahhh mr ackerman, if it isn’t a pleasure to see you?”

levi hears an investor greet him but his eyes are glued on you.

you’re laughing so hard at one of braun’s jokes and he feels the same flame in his stomach.

it’s rising and reaches his chest igniting once again and he narrows his eyes finally looking away

he’s not going to spare you another glance this entire evening instead he’ll occupy himself with business talk

“mr acker-”

spinning on his heel he twists around and is face to face to with one of his close sponsors erwin smith

he smiles and the two shake hands discussing new company developments and shared work stress before some how shifting to each other's personal lives

“seeing anyone?” erwin’s question makes levi stiffen and his eyes flick towards where you were just standing a while ago

you’re no longer there but he spots you a little further away now sitting alone

you look a little lost and he feels a sudden and strong magnetism

he wants to approach you to talk so badly, and as his eyes scan around the room he sees reiner occupying himself in a suggestive conversation with a lady from HR

she’s definitely trying to flirt and he’s reciprocating easily

oh, so you’ve been ditched...?

is reiner OK???

first the backhanded compliment

now he’s ditching YOU???

it makes levi feel a little angry and frustrated

he doesn’t even notice at first because he’s so deep in thought but erwin leans in to whisper in his ear. “i know that look, go talk to your crush.”

“we’re much too old for you to be using the term crush. it makes it sound childish.” levi grumbles before taking a sip from his wine glass

“i’ll go keep my secretary company. i’ve spoke to most of the other investors it should be okay.” the statement is more of a question but smith nods in response

“it’ll be more than okay, go get em’ tiger!” erwin lands a light punch onto levi’s shoulder and he grins before walking away

to levi’s disappointment he’s unable to speak to you

you end up getting dragged into conversation with some of the other employees and he doesn’t see you again

so much for talking to you, he couldn’t even get within a meters radius

he’s now out on the balcony for a breathe of fresh air, the past few hours have consisted of tedious and forced small talk with an investor’s daughter

her father has been BEGGING levi, even bribing him to consider marrying her but levi rejects every single time

there’s nothing wrong with the girl really

she’s well educated and quite pretty but... that’s all he knows about her?

AND no one beats you, even though he’s still kinda in denial about liking you

hell, not like that part matters he doesn’t even know the girl’s name what does her dad expect from him?

was it sharron? shana? he forgot her name as soon as it was said 

much to levi’s dismay he hears an unexpected giggle behind him and then an arm slinks over his shoulder, the investor’s daughter has followed him out and is now pressing her chest against him awaiting a reaction

frankly, he wants to push her off BUT he’ll be in big trouble and lose a key sponsor if he handles this incorrectly

“could you please distance yourself?” he tries to intimidate the younger girl away with the bitter tone of his voice but it only seems to motivate her

“feisty one aren’t you?” she’s looking up at him through her lashes and her poor attempt at looking appealing only makes levi internally face palm

her index finger is drawing circles into his tie and he feels his breath hitch due to how uncomfortable she’s making him

“please move.” he requests for her to listen once again and he’s now taken a step back but she only follows and keeps her firm grip on his tie

she doesn’t seem to be letting up and there’s nothing he can really do about it.

he guesses he’ll just wait till she gets bored but the time passes at an excruciatingly slow rate

in this fifteen minute duration she’s played around with his hair which has SERIOUSLY annoyed him because he took time to style it

and he thought it looked pretty cool

now she’s only pushed and pushed further and further into his chest and he can feel her hot icky breath hit his neck

the veins in his forehead are twitching in expanding irritation and he doesn’t know how much more of this he can tolerate

“you’re making him uncomfortable.” levi’s head snaps to the right and there you are still as beautiful as the last time he saw you

your arms crossed over your chest and you’re looking the girl up and down

“and who might you be?” the way she scoffs seems to be enough to piss you off because your face morphs into a scowl.

big Yikes...you’re mad

“leave him alone.”

“you must be of no importance, we have no time for-”

“step away before i make a report on the grounds of sexual harassment.”

you flip your phone out smirk plastered across your face

“it’s all been recorded. know your place.” you’re unyielding and even levi is thinking??? wow??? you know how to not be nice??? because well, he’s never seen you this mad 

just as you expect she barges out in a fury (not before flicking you off), you’ve left her brimming with rage and you feel rather proud of yourself

you release a content sigh

“do i get a raise for saving you or what?” you dryly jab 

he’s always loved your straightforward jokes, they align perfectly with his blunt humour

he murmurs his appreciative thanks

“are you enjoying yourself?” he asks the question eager to know what your answer is

it’s another way he knows he’s falling way too deep for his liking

he never asks anyone else these trivial questions

“enjoyable. although reiner is a little.” you pause to find the correct words

“he just made me a little uncomfy, he’s very extroverted so i felt out of place. thankfully he’s preoccupied himself elsewhere.” the same lonely look from before returns to your face 

yeah, it is kinda sucky to have your date ditch you

“you don’t have to tolerate-” levi starts then stops.

you’ve leant in to hear him after saying you can’t hear much over the hustle and bustle from inside

“the- i mean- what i’m trying to say is” he looks at you completely stunned trying to piece together what he wants to say

wOWIE!!!! you literally look so stunning up close he can not formulate a sentence, he has officially LOST IT

the words he say next fly out of his mouth after a lengthy internal struggle “fuck. what i’m saying is, what i mean is, you could always come as my date next time.”

now you’re the one looking at him stupefied.

again, he’s looking anywhere but at you

the closest he gets to it is taking a glimpse of your dress,

it’s black and suits you well with the little ruffles and all.

“i’d love that.”

the tips of his ears grow red in embarrassment but... YOU ACCEPTED???

NOW. levi is giddy on the inside but makes no move to make it obvious instead he opts to scratch his neck and give you an awkward thumbs up

you take note of his body language and the possible realization dawns on you

but you can’t really tell if it’s the doing of alcohol

either way you grab onto his suit and begin to lead the way back into the main hall

“may as well start being my date now? not like reiner’s coming back any time soon” he can’t see your face but he can tell you’re smiling as you speak

levi’s cheeks are bright red but he thanks the chilly night air and darkness for hiding the way he’s reacting

he won’t confess just yet, it’s too early and again he’s in major denial but when staring at the hand that holds onto his suit jacket his heart tingles a little

more like a LOT...

but really whatever it is the two of you have got going on right now it weirdly makes the both of you feel weak at the knees

to be honest, levi enjoys it

and so do you :-)

[mikauzoran]

The Plan (TM) (re: Mikau’s WIPs)

Okay. So, I have Lukadrien June 2020 behind me, and I finished my piece for LuXY Week. I still have some editing before I post the remaining chapters of these things, but the hard part is done. So. What next?

I’ve got a variety of works in progress to choose from, and I’m not sure where I want to focus my energies at the moment. Below is my workload in order from “most likely to work on” to “least likely to work on”.

Thoughts? Feelings? Suggestions? Opinions?

Things I am Most Likely to Work on at Present:

The Adventures of Off-Brand Ladybug and Chat Noir: This is a one-shot (I hope.) You can read an excerpt here. It’s Adrienette in a post-Season Three setting and focuses on Adrien noticing that Marinette is mega-stressed, so he takes her out for coffee in an attempt to be a good friend. They end up talking about a lot of things both silly and serious, and the whole thing ends with a reveal and dating. 

I did an outline for this one that’s seven hundred eighteen words long. I’m currently two thousand words into the story, and I’ve covered the first sentence of my outline. ^.^; Whoops? Anyway. I’m probably going to tackle this one first just to get it off my plate, since I have a clear idea of where it’s going from start to finish. It’s just a matter of sitting down and writing. There’s nothing really to figure out.

Paw de Deux: This is another one-shot. (Again, I hope.) You can read an excerpt here. This is Marichat-style Adrienette. They’re at a masked ball, and Adrien is wearing a black mask and cat ears, so when he goes up to Marinette (whom he has recognized as Ladybug), she recognizes him as Chat Noir (though, she doesn’t realize that he’s also Adrien. She just thinks she’s run into her partner detransformed and putting his identity at risk). She drags him off to a secluded balcony to give him an earful, and they talk and flirt. Adrien’s cover is eventually blown. It ends happily.

I have about one thousand five hundred words written so far and an idea of the main events of the story. I don’t know what they’re going to talk and flirt about yet out on the balcony, but I trust something will come to me and it will be delightful. Maybe I’ll do this one first. :/ I think it will end up shorter than Off-Brand, so maybe I should just finish it and get it out of the way. 

I don’t know. Does either one seem more interesting to you? Which one would you want first?

Serendipity: Fifty Marichat and Adrienette Kisses: Basically what it says on the label. Marinette and Chat are dating. Adrien accidentally kisses Marinette, forgetting he’s not Chat at the moment, and Marinette and Adrien eventually end up seeing one another behind Chat’s back. Equal measures of angst and fluff. I’m “working on” Chapter Thirteen right now. I say “working on” because I haven’t really touched the story in a month. I’m really disenchanted with it right now, but people seem to like it, so I want to try to force myself to keep working on this.

Four Kisses Meme: This is just an idea floating around in my mind, but the meme is a kiss on four different places, and I wanted to do a different kiss with each corner of the love square. I was thinking Ear: Lady Noir, Forehead: Ladrien, Nose: Marichat, Lips: Adrienette. That should be fairly quick and only four chapters. The story is Adrien/Chat realizing that it’s time to move on from Ladybug and that he wants to give things with Marinette a chance.

The Seduction of Adrien Agreste: This is part of the Springtime in Wonderland (Daisy/Jabberwocky) series. It deals with Luka and Adrien experimenting with physical intimacy to see if they can reach a compromise where Luka and (asexual) Adrien are both comfortable and have their needs met. 

This part of the series takes place literally right before the final chapter of Daisy/Jabberwocky. If I write it now, I have a feeling that it’s not going to fit neatly in the series timeline because I have a lot of ground to cover with Daisy and Jabberwocky, and I know that things are going to shift around and change between now and when I finally get to write that final chapter. I’m thinking that it doesn’t matter so much, though. People seem excited for this part of the series, and I think it would be an interesting challenge to write a Mature work. Having a couple things not mesh chronologically with the rest of the work isn’t a huge deal because each of the works in the series can be read by itself as a stand-alone work anyway, so... I’m inclined to maybe try my hand at this part of the story before circling back to Daisy and Jabberwocky at a later date. Also, that way, when I get to the end, I won’t have to stop and write Seduction before posting the final chapter of Jabberwocky/Daisy. ^.^;

Things I am Least Likely to Work on at Present:

Happenstance and Magic: Marichat May 2019. Marinette and Chat Noir adopt kittens together, and Adrien tries to get Marinette to see that he’s not perfect but still a worthwhile person deserving of her love. 

I think this would be the easiest of my big WIPs to finish. You may have noticed that when given free reign, I tend to write ridiculous amounts. Like, the Springtime universe is massive to the point of being a little overwhelming. I think I’m going to have to work on that over the course of the next few years. Ditto for Rejects. I mean, I’ve just entered Week Two in the story, and I have a whole MONTH of content planned out before we get to the end. And look how long it is already. -.-; Both of those projects are going to be “chip away a little bit at a time” works. 

Happenstance is structured on the Marichat May 2019 prompt list, so there are only thirty-one chapters possible. And I already have seven chapters done and my notes for the rest. I can sit down and get that done in a couple months maybe. It’s doable. This is probably the next project that I’m going to circle back to because it feels more manageable.

The Rejects Club: Predominantly Marichat with Adrienette. Chat Noir and Marinette unexpectedly grow very close very fast as they open up to one another after Marinette overhears Adrien seemingly dismissing her as a romantic prospect. Identity shenanigans at farcical levels ensue.

Like I said above, I have a lot left to do on this one. -.-; I probably won’t devote a lot of time to it this year because I’m planning to work on the above-listed items first. That being said, when I stopped work on this for a mental health break last year, I had four chapters drafted that I hadn’t released yet. I got burned out on this story really bad. I was in really bad mental health while I was writing it, only sleeping four or five hours and spending all my free time working on Rejects, so I really needed time away from the project. 

Until very recently, I’ve still felt burned out on the project, but a week ago was the one-year anniversary of me publishing Chapter Twenty-Four, so I decided to edit Chapter Twenty-Five and post it. Over the next three months, I plan to edit and post the remaining three unposted chapters. I probably won’t start work on the story again at that point, but at least you’ll have everything I’ve written. I’ll see how I’m feeling after Happenstance.

Springtime in Wonderland: Mess. Eventual good mental health and happy ending, but mess in the meantime. ^.^ If you’ve read it, you know that this is an accurate summary. This one is really emotionally and mentally draining for me, so it’s not good to work on when I’m in poor mental health. At the time of this post, it is still 2020, and I think the whole world is in poor mental health. I’ll probably do some fun Nachtmusik chapters, but I don’t anticipate getting much done on the story proper this year.

And that’s it for right now. Thoughts? Opinions? What are you most excited for? What sounds interesting?

[afangirlwashere]

Risk pt.3 (Peter Parker x superhero!reader)

(gif is not mine all the credit goes to the creator)

Summary: Two months have passed now. Friendships were strengthened by sharing embarrassing photos and spending weekends together. What comes next? What if a mission goes wrong? 

A/N: I am.. Not that happy with this one IDK why.. Just had a hard time translating it from my native language. This is the last part, for now, I might decide to pick it back up later because I have a few more ideas for this series but we’ll see... All of the feedback, reblogs, etc. mean a lot to me so THANK YOU!! Requests are open as always you can check my list of characters I write for here <3

Warnings: Infinity war spoilers!! other than that nothing really. there’s a little swearing.

part 1  part 2  part 4

(you can listen to this song while reading)

________________________________________________________________

“Oh no...” Ned whimpers.

“Yep...” Peter nods and dodges a flying paper ball in the hallway. 

“Dude... If she already saw THAT photo it’s over. Even I contemplated not being friends with you after I saw it!” Ned throws a big pile of books in his locker and closes it “It’s the most embarrassing thing I ever saw. Why does your aunt always has to show it? Why do you let her? And why didn’t you like... ‘accidentally’ burn it or ‘made it disappear’?”

“Because it’s one of the few photos that my dad took of me. She loves all of them but this one especially. I can’t get rid of it. I can’t do that to her.” he explains.

Ned slowly nods “Yeah that would be a dick move.” they just stand next to his locker for a second “But Mr. Stark didn’t see it right?” 

Peter looks horrified “God no! No, no, no, no that’s the first thing I told May after he left our apartment, he can never see that photo! He’d call me panty liner for the rest of my life.” 

“Okay panty liner my locker isn’t waiting for her period to come any time soon so if you could stop protecting it and move away that would be great.” (Y/N) appears out of a sudden. 

Peter steps away from her locker while Ned laughs his ass off. 

“Sorry... I couldn’t pass the opportunity. And I’m kind of getting MJ’s manners, we’ve been hanging out a bit more lately.” (Y/N) pushes her hair to one side and lets her whole profile exposed to the boys.

Peter’s eyes are glued to her the whole time she looks for her textbook and heads to class wawing at the boys without looking at them and muttering something as a temporary goodbye. 

“You’re not very smooth with that puppy-eyed expression Peter. I think if I’ll have to watch your tortured lovesick face for more than two months I’m gonna have to keep a barf bag around.” Michelle creeps up behind.

“You should have seen him last weekend when we watched Stranger Things. (Y/N) fell asleep next to him and was slowly falling on his shoulder. ‘Ned what do I doo?’ the panic in his eyes... It was hilarious.” Ned laughs.

“It was stressful okay? I never had this happen to me! I didn’t know what to do, I still don’t know!” Peter defends himself.

“You should just tell her,” MJ says like it’s obvious.

“I’ve been telling him the whole time!” Ned cheers “She’s intelligent, hard-working, pretty, you have a lot in common,” he winks “she can literally tell you the history of the whole world, loves building legos - I still can’t believe she rebuilt the Millenium Falcon in one day when she accidentally knocked it down and broke it - loves to watch Avatar: The Last Airbender - we have to have another re-watch together sometime - and she’s super funny!” 

“I mean.. I don’t really give much recognition to other’s but... (Y/N) is one of the people in this school that I don’t actually hate. She’s pretty cool. And Ned is right she’s hilarious.” Michelle gives her point of view. 

“Yeah, she had a funny remark just now about that super embarrassing pho-”

“Dude!” Peter interrupts him. 

“What?” Ned shrugs.

MJ frowns “You mean that super embarrassing naked picture when you were three and put a bunch of panty liners all over your body, even covering your small pen-” 

“Did (Y/N) tell you about it?!” Peter’s voice cracks halfway.

“No, she didn’t Kermit.” she uses the old nickname for Peter “Ned did. A while ago actually.” 

“Ned!” Peter angrily grunts. 

“I’m sorry! It slipped and she can be really scary when she needs to be!” Ned backs away a bit. 

“I tried to draw it once because I couldn’t really imagine it.” Michelle blurts out receiving two concerned looks from the boys. 

“You’re really weird y’know?” Ned says. 

“Yeah... I get that a lot from other people.” Michelle squints her eyes at them.

________________________________________________________________

After two months of catching up (Y/N) is at least a decent student. Not the top of the class though. That position is reserved for people like Flash and Peter.

Flash is all rich, privileged and snobby. A modern bully truly.  There were a few times when he provoked Peter so much that it would be understandable for him to throw a punch but he never did. If anything he backed away trying to disappear.

(Y/N) spoke to him about it once.

“Why do you let him do that? A punch in the face would handle it and we’d never hear from Flash again I guarantee you that. You would have the upper hand.” 

“And that’s why I can’t do it even if I wanted to. It wouldn’t be fair. I have these powers not to hurt people but to protect them. I would love to do all sorts of sports but with my strength, it would be unfair to have such an advantage.” Peter explained.

“You’re ripping yourself off of all the high school experiences that way.” (Y/N) argued.

Peter just shrugged “It’s the superhero burden I have to take. I wouldn’t punch Flash even if I was a normal teenager. That’s not me.”

(Y/N) clenched her teeth “But that’s me. I’m breaking his nose next time.” 

“You can’t do that! They would call your parents and they’d have to come in to talk to the principal!” he freaked out.

“The only person that would have to come to the principal’s office would be Mr. Stark. He’s the one responsible for me now. And I’m pretty sure he’s wealthier  than Flash's parents.” 

Peter is the opposite of Flash.  He doesn’t come from a rich family, he’s not arrogant or privileged because of the money on his bank account.  He’s caring and does whatever he can to help anyone even when it’s not in his power. 

(Y/N) noticed that whenever an ambulance or a police car passes the school and its sirens reach to their classroom Peter’s eyes fly to the window and he gets all nervous and starts to wiggle in his chair.  He wants to go out there and be helpful. It surprised her how much he searches for danger. 

But his caring side stretches out even more. They meet up every week at least twice to do some school work. It benefits both of them. Peter can’t jump in his suit and go be Spider-Man since he has to stay and do his work plus help (Y/N). And she has a place without distractions (until Ned comes) and basically gets a tutor.

Peter is a great teacher. He explains everything with so much patience it amazes her. Seven times is his record in explaining one thing. 

They are slowly developing a tradition with aunt May. Every Thursday (Y/N) stays for dinner sometimes joined by Ned too. 

When May found out (Y/N) lived alone in her own apartment without any parental supervision she almost had a heart attack. Let’s say Mr. Stark had to deal with a very long furious phonecall but when he explained how everything works and how he makes sure that she’s got everything she needs it calmed her down at least a bit. 

For a moment she even considered having her move to the Parkers. In the end, they negotiated that she’ll be having dinner with them every Thursday and if she ever needed she can come to their place at any hour of the day. 

“24/7 calling service. If you ever need to talk I’m here for you sunshine.” May’s heartwarming smiles always lightened her mood. 

It’s obvious where Peter got his caring side from. 

It’s currently Wednesday 11PM which sounds like the best time to start writing an essay that’s due tomorrow right?  Thankfully for (Y/N), it was a history essay which shouldn’t be as hard. 

Legs hanging from her bed dangling in the rhythm of the song playing in her earbuds make her stay awake. 

Just ten minutes into vomiting words onto the page she hears a loud thud on her window that couldn’t drown in the beats of the music. 

(Y/N) turns to the window suddenly wide awake. It sounded like a bullet. Thankfully Mr. Stark made sure all the windows are going to be bulletproof so as long as they stay closed she’ll be fine. 

Her lazy ass didn’t close the blinds, therefore, the blood smeared handprint is the first thing she sees. 

She throws her laptop on the bed and runs over to the window. 

There he is. 

Lying on her fire escape stairs. 

Spider-Man.

“Peter?!” (Y/N) shrieks while tugging at the window to open it as wide as possible “Can you get up? I have to get you inside.” she holds her hand out and he shakily clutches it. 

It takes them a minute before Peter slips through the window into her warm room. 

His suit is torn on so many places it looks more like a weird piece of clothing sewed from rags. There’s dried up blood on all the cuts and fresh on his hands. Whoever he was fighting must have hit some of his suit's systems which were powering the heater since Peter was shivering.

“What the hell happened?!” 

While pulling off the Spider-Man mask he reveals his beaten up face full of bruises. He even managed to cut up his eyebrow. 

(Y/N) covers her mouth in shock and stares at him. 

“I-I’m sorry I couldn’t go home because May would have freaked out and I panicked! If she saw me like that-”

“Get that suit off and take a shower.” (Y/N) starts pushing him to the door.

Peter looks surprised at how calm her voice sounds all of a sudden and does as she tells him. 

(Y/N) gives him an old big unisex shirt that she wears at home to change into. She doesn’t have any pants for him here so he has to stay in his boxers. 

After ten minutes he comes back to her room looking ashamed of himself.  (Y/N) sits on her bed bitting her nails and nervously hitting the bed frame with her foot.  She was considering calling Tony or his aunt the whole time he was in the shower. What if he has internal bleeding or something else neither of them can recognize. 

“There was... a lot of blood... But I cleaned it all off! You don’t have to worry about it...” he whispers the last sentence. 

He feels bad for putting her under such pressure.

(Y/N) quickly stands up and walks over to him.

She touches his bicep “Are you hurt here?” 

“No-oww!” Peter whimpers when she punches him with all her strength. 

“What the hell were you thinking?! Who the fuck were you going against?! You should have called me for backup there’s strength in numbers! God, you’re such an idiot Peter what if something worse happened to you? Huh...? Start thinking before you go in!” 

Maybe I should have gone to aunt May, Peter thinks to himself. 

“And now sit down I have to sew up your eyebrow and disinfect all your wounds.” (Y/N) commands him still pissed off and he can’t do anything but listen.

“I’m sorry...” Peter whispers when (Y/N) sprays in his cuts.

“Am I missing any?” she completely ignores his apology which is a sign for him to try harder. 

“There’s one on my back. It bled the most.” he turns around and pushes his shirt up.

“Oh my god Peter...” (Y/N) mumbles lightly touching a giant gash on Peter’s back making him groan in pain “This is going to hurt badly but you have to take it. You should have bled out due to this but I think all your healing powers are concentrating on this big cut because it looks like it’s already sealing. I’m not even gonna sew it, it would have been unnecessary pain.” 

When they finish this painful thing they move on to sewing.  Peter isn’t the biggest fan of needles but he trusts (Y/N). He’s not sure where she learned to do it but when he sees how precisely she threads the eye of the needle he knows he’s in good hands. 

Their faces are inches away from each other now.

Ever since (Y/N) got him out of that...place Thanos put him in he trusted her with his life more than anyone. His first instinct was to go to her when he got hurt. He couldn’t help but feel safe around her.  The need to protect her was there too even though she proved that she’s more than capable of taking care of herself. 

Before he can organize all his thoughts she’s already cutting the thread and checking his eyebrow for the last time. 

“(Y/N) I am really sorry. I didn’t want to scare you like that. Honestly, it’s the last thing I wanted to do. I feel like an absolute idiot now.” Peter tries to apologize again.

“You are an idiot. But you always do the heroic thing, Peter... Always. And that’s one of the things I like about you. You sacrifice yourself for others, you never show off even when you have all the right to do it, whenever there’s a crime you’re there in a second and you don’t care if you have an army behind your back or if you’re all alone against a thousand bad guys. You’d still fight them. And that’s what heroes do. But that’s also what idiots do. And since May isn’t here,” she leans forward and kisses the sewed up cut on his eyebrow “Someone has to do it. It probably doesn’t have the same power as hers would but... At least something.” 

Peter’s heart starts racing. He gently takes her hand before she pulls away from him “Wait.” this is the first time she let him touch her without flinching since he’s been back in the world of the living.

Her skin is soft which makes Peter’s throat feel dry. 

He hears Ned’s, May’s and Michelle’s voices in his head. 

Dude! Kiss her! 

Come on Peter!

You’re brave enough to fight with a bunch of criminals but you don’t have the courage to kiss a girl? Don’t be a loser Parker.

Peter has the same puppy-eyed expression. His big hazel eyes looking right at her make her cheeks feel hot. 

“I-I just wanted to thank you for this. Not just this! But... but everything you do for me not just now but in school too and that you have my back and I can count on you when something happens and...” Peter knows he’s babbling again. There’s nothing he can do about it. This is just how he deals with nervousness. 

“I should be the one thanking you. If you didn't tutor me I would probably fail chemistry. With my skills? I’d be sent back to middle school.” (Y/N) chuckles. 

Peter is still holding her hand and it makes her skin burn with anticipation. 

“That was nothing really. I actually enjoyed it! Going through the basics again with you was fun so it’s not such a big deal! You do a lot more for me! I don’t know where I’d be without you (Y/N) and I just wanted to thank you for all-”

“Come on...” she interrupts him because it’s nerve-racking to listen to his nervous babbling.  

“What?” he’s dumbfoundedly looking at her with his big eyes. 

“Kiss me!” (Y/N) feels like she’s going to explode if she won’t finally feel his lips against hers. 

Peter’s face changes into the one she was slowly falling in love with over those two months. It’s full of deep affection, his torn up eyebrow turning just the right way and the way light glistens in his eyes...

He finally leans in and connects their lips. 

And did the fireworks explode at that moment?

No.

It feels like there are stars exploding inside them. No, galaxies! The whole universe just exploded and they are the only ones left.  Even though they are just two teenagers kissing in a room. That’s how it feels. 

Peter’s hand moves from her forearm to her shoulder. He always thought it would be awkward and he wouldn’t know what to do with his hands but they instinctively move to her neck pulling her even closer to him.

(Y/N) tangles her hand in his hair and cups his face with the other. She doesn’t want the kiss to end. This moment can’t end.

Peter is overflown with pleasure wrapping a hand around her waist drawing her closer. 

Eventually, they have to move away from each other both panting with hungry expressions.  The second their heads stop spinning both of Peter’s hands wrap around (Y/N)’s waist again and she plays with his hair.

He gently places her on the bed enjoying how she looks under him for a moment.  They both examine each other's faces from a new angle for a second and it seems they like the change. 

(Y/N) pulls Peter in for another kiss while she ventures with her hand under his shirt sending chills all over his body.  She starts to pull it up as a sign she wants it off and he understands perfectly. 

He puts all his weight on his knees and swiftly throws the shirt somewhere on the ground. Before he can steal another kiss (Y/N) puts her palm on his chest and stops him.

She sees his whole torso for the first time which looks like a minefield of bruises and cuts after tonight.

“You don’t have to worry... It almost doesn’t hurt... promise.” Peter mumbles. 

Seeing her wistful gaze makes him feel a whole new emotion he can’t explain yet.

(Y/N) changes their positions in one brisk movement being the one on top now. Peter looks almost shocked at the sudden change. Maybe even a little scared.

(Y/N) lowers her lips to his arm and gives a long kiss to one of the bigger bruises slowly making her way down his body treating every bruise the same. 

Peter can’t stop himself from letting out a few moans. This is the first time he’s experiencing something like this and it is so much better than he imagined it to be. 

She stops right at his bellybutton viewing a cut that’s just above his V-line. Peter notices she stopped so he opens his eyes and looks at her.  It takes him a second to realize what she’s thinking about. 

“We don’t have to do it. I would never pressure you into it, we don’t have to rush it.” he tries to reassure her. 

“I know.” she nods still buried in her thoughts “Just promise me you won’t endanger yourself like that again so that moment can actually happen.” her eyes lock with his. 

Peter stays silent. He’s not answering because they both know he can’t promise her that and he’s not going to lie to her either.

“I’d kiss your whole back too but I think that would be a weird position to be in..” (Y/N) moves up to his face “But I hope this will make up for it.” her lips slowly travel from his neck to his lips. 

This kiss is slower and they’re both enjoying it as much as possible. 

After a few more exchanges like this (Y/N) rests her head on Peter’s chest listening to his strong stable heartbeat.

He rests his chin on her head and breathes in the scent of her hair which overwhelms his senses. Seems like coconut is his favorite smell now. 

With their feet and hands tangled they both peacefully fall asleep.

Some risks were taken.

But there’s nothing to rush, right? 

Tag list: @adventurousbooknerd  @yafriendlyfangirl @royalestrellas

[realpcwife]

A Dreamer’s Pursuit- Part 1

Note-The book is written in first person with certain scenarios explained by the narrator. I will include better explanations to areas which are difficult to understand in the author’s note below. Thank you and enjoy.

1.October 15, 2018

Jongho:

21:00

We were all tired. As the youngest in the group I did not say much. But I saw how Seonghwa was so stressed. He’s been trying so hard but I can see him breaking down. Wooyoung is discussing with yeosang about some choreography. Yunho is on his phone. I am too tired, I came to get a drink outside. Last week San left because his dad was sick and he had to takeover the delivery business, he couldn’t waste more time on this group. We were so hopeful 3 months ago but now all of us don’t believe in it anymore. Nothing is going the way we want, debuting seems like an unattainable dream. We all made our sacrifices. None of have slept in 2 days. I don’t even understand the meaning of the word dream anymore, literally and metaphorically. I am scared to nap because of my nightmares. I know seonghwa has them too. He wakes up scared in the afternoon. I want this to end soon.

21:30

I got my drink from the local supermarket and I’m walking back towards our building. But I can feel someone following me. It’s too late for any normal person to be walking around this area. I turn around but I see nothing. I tried to dismiss the thought. I am only a few steps away but the footsteps I hear can’t be mistaken. I hurry into the building and go to the practice room. And I started the same old dance routine again. 

2.October 17,2018

Jongho:

22:00

This is starting to creep me out. From the last two days I feel like I’m being watched whenever I go out of the practice room. I don’t want to tell the others because I can’t have them worry about more things than they already have to worry about. I’m young but I don’t want to be a burden to them. 

I’m walking to our dorm on the upper floor because I need my charger but something feels wrong again. I saw a window open so I just went to close it and the moment I turned around my heart almost jumped out of my chest. I saw him. He had a black fedora on his head. His face was covered with a black mask and a few rusted chains made an ‘x’ where his mouth is. He was in full black. I almost didn’t see him , he camouflaged with the darkness in the hallways. But there is no way I can mistake his eyes. They had an almost dead expression on them. The red veins in the corner popped. Anyone could tell that the guy probably hadn’t slept in a long time. It was my eyes. I was staring at what can be called an alter ego of myself. And he held out an hourglass to me. 

“It will help you pursuit your dream”

I wanted to ask him, “ What dream? I have no dreams anymore “ 

Before I said anything , he walked away and faded away into the darkness. I couldn’t see him anymore.

I looked down at the hourglass. It was made of expensive wood and at the end it had a small hook and attached to it was a chain. The chain had a ring on one end and a small rod at the other end which passed through the ring and closed the chain, like a bracelet. The sand inside was white and it shone in the light. It was very pretty. I went back to the dance room with it and put it with the stack of my other belongings and I forgot about it as I danced again.

3.October 17,2018

Wooyoung:

22:15

I saw Jongho walk out to get his charger a while ago. I wanted to tell him to get my notebook as well. I rushed out behind him. I didn’t expect to see what I did when I came out to the corridor.

There was a man in front of Jongho, his back was towards me so I couldn’t see who he was. All I saw was that he was dressed in black and had a black fedora, his outline only faintly visible because of the corridor light. On the other hand Jongho’s face was pale , whatever the man looked like , I could tell it was not very nice judging by that expression. Moments later they exchanged an object. It looked like an hourglass. It had a small dangling chain on it. Both the man and jongho disappeared after this . I just stood there until I saw jongho’s silhouette coming back and I rushed inside. He didn’t know I was there. 

October 18,2018

3:00 

I can’t sleep. I keep thinking about the man in the hallway with Jongho. I Sacrificed a lot to be in this group. I could have gotten into any college I wanted with my grades and with my parents’ background but I wanted to stay with my friends. I genuinely considered them my brothers. Me, San and Yeosang promised that we will debut together. But San left almost 2 weeks ago. I couldn’t blame him. If I was in his place I would leave too. But I can’t help the disappointment. And now I can’t help but think that Jongho has a secret he’s not telling us. I creep out of my room and walk to his.

From under the door of his room , an eerie blue light faintly lit the corridor. That’s strange. I’ve never seen that before. I go closer and try to open his room. It’s not locked. The door flung open and I see the source of the light is the hourglass he got. But he was nowhere to be seen. His room was empty. I run out and look around nearby but he’s nowhere1.. Maybe he went to get something to eat. At this hour? Maybe I’m just dreaming.

4.October 18,2018

Seonghwa

9:00

Jongho disappeared last night. And no one knows where or why. This is the last thing I wanted to happen. I’m on the verge of giving up. I am taking pills everyday because of the headaches I get from my nightmares. I wasted so many years trying to debut now I am stuck admitting that it’s not possible. I might clean the dorms and the practice rooms today to clear my mind. 

17:00

I was in the practice room. While cleaning Jongho’s room today I found a very pretty hourglass. I don’t know how he got it but I liked it so I put it on the table in our practice room. We had a discussion with all members and we agree that Jongho must have left because he couldn’t take it anymore. I can’t blame him. Because I’m going to the same thing. I can’t do this anymore. I want to write the members a letter. 

I was at the desk writing a letter . I’ve already scratched out and rewritten the same thing multiple times. I don’t know what to say to the others . This is stressing me out more than before. I scrunched up the last thing I wrote and threw it away again. But I accidentally hit the hourglass on the table and now its on the ground, one of its wooden legs came out and a piece of the glass broke and the sand is on the floor. My anxiety is through the roof right now. I don’t think I can stay here. I am going out for a walk.

21:00

I walked outside for too long. It’s too late to walk back so I’m taking the subway. There’s a station right next to our dorm building so it’s convenient. I was about to get into the subway when I saw a man’s face in the reflection in the window. He had on a black fedora and was dressed in black. He even had a black mask on his face. But what caught me off guard was he looked like me 2.. I felt like I was looking at myself. I turn around immediately to see him but there was no one there. I turn back and suddenly the station was empty. Meaning even the train was gone. There was no way it left in that small instant that I looked around. Also the lights of the station were dimmer and not a single person existed in the place. I walked outside to see what was happening and came out to a place I was so familiar with- my house before I became a trainee. But it was different. This looked like the house from my……… nightmare. The same nightmare that troubled me everyday. I was standing in front of it. Is this a dream?  But I never fell asleep. 3.

5.October 18, 2018

Yeosang

15:00 

We just finished a meeting with the members about Jongho disappearing. I walked into the dance room slightly upset but a little hourglass on the table caught my eye. I went over to see it. It had a cute little dangly bracelet on it . I really liked it so I removed it and put it on my own hand. It looks very pretty. Something to cheer me up.4.

21:00

I was going to the canteen to grab something to eat but I felt like I was walking for longer than usual on my way to the canteen. Was this corridor always so long? But when I entered the room I didn’t see a canteen. I saw a house I didn’t recognise. And I saw seonghwa looking at the house as if he had just seen a ghost.

*Narrator-

What none of them realised is that the hourglass was magical. And it only worked when it was with the Dreamer’s chain. People can enter and exit the alternate dream world with the hourglass. But that all changed when Seonghwa broke it. Everything in the dream world changed into a reflection of his nightmares. He became the main character in a setting which he detested the most. Since someone meddled with the hourglass and broke it, the system started functioning in a way it never did before. If you enter the world now, you had no way of getting back out. If you get hurt in this world, you would get hurt in reality. And since yeosang wore the chain which was so closely associated with the hourglass, he gets dragged into what was supposed to be only Seonghwa’s nightmare.5.*

6.October 18,2018

Wooyoung-

23:20

Me and Yunho walked into the dance room after we came back from our shopping trip. We went out to get some essentials. But when we walked into the room we saw a broken hourglass on the ground. Around it was a bunch of paper balls which someone had thrown. But the weird thing was that the sand was glowing blue. AGAIN.

After that other day I already thought that if what I saw was not a dream, then this hourglass was not a normal one. Now I feel like I was right. Before I could say something, I see Yunho run from beside me and drop on the ground next to the mess. He picked up a paper ball and read it.

“ It’s Seonghwa. But its incomplete.”

He looked through a few more of the papers on the ground

“They’re all the same. He wants to leave”

That sentence knocked the air out of my gut. I can’t believe they’re all leaving me. I did so much and they’re…..leaving.

Just when I thought that I look over because I heard yunho gasp. I see that he cut his hand on the glass while picking up another paper. He reached down to try and move the broken hourglass aside but even as he’s doing that he completely disappears6.. 

He left too. 

In front of me eyes. 

I was in front of the mirror. A lot of thoughts are running through my head.I look up and suddenly I was a man in the mirror- he wore a black fedora and was dressed in black but he looked so much like me it surprised me. Was this the guy Jongho saw that day?

“You can go with them. You have to only do what Yunho did”

He told me this and disappeared . I have to do what YUnho did- I have to cut my hand on the glass? Does that have something to with the hourglass? I had no idea.

 But I was sure of one thing-

“I gave up on the easy way out to be with my friends. But we’re wrong. I’m only going to think about one thing now”

I can’t go behind them anymore. I had to work for myself. I told myself this over and over again as I left the room to the the dorm bed. But I can’t help feeling guilty. I feel like I am betraying them. But they did it first. 

*Time has no relevance in the dream world and the parts inside the dream realm will have no reference to the time of the day or year whatsoever*

7. Dream Realm

Seonghwa-

I was staring at the house from my nightmares when I heard yeosang call me. I looked in the direction of the voice and he was standing there. I walk over to him. On the way over, I realise I have no shoes on from before and I’m walking on the rock garden- a recurring thing that happened in my nightmare. I am confused because yeosang has never been in this dream before. This was the first time something different was happening. But the thing that surprised me more was the fact that I felt the pain in my feet from walking on the rocks. If this was a dream I must not be able to feel any pain. I look down at the ground behind me and I see little spots of blood from my feet which almost makes me lose balance and fall down. So this whole thing is not a dream? Am I really inside my nightmare right now? I’ve never felt more terrified

Yeosang-

I see seonghwa walk over to me. I am still very very confused as to what is happening. When he reaches me he looks behind himself and almost falls down. I ask him “Hyung, what happened?”

“This is not a dream. I am inside my nightmare”

His voice was merely a whisper and he sounded like he was held at gunpoint. And did he just say we’re inside his nightmare? It would makes sense for seonghwa to be there but why am I here?

Before I could think any further I hear a voice

“Hyung”

Yunho-

I don’t know what happened. 

I was picking up the letters which Seonghwa wrote but I cut my hand on the glass on the floor. After that I woke up next to a bush and I looked up to see a house I didn’t recognise. I heard voices behind the house so I walked over and saw seonghwa and yeosang. I came there just in time to hear seonghwa say, “ I am inside my nightmare”

I called him, “ Hyung”

They both turn to look at me way more surprised than I was myself, “ What do you mean we’re inside a nightmare?”

Seonghwa- “ This…. This is what I get nightmares about everyday. But for some reason you both are here as well today. But that’s not all. I have walked over the rocks here in the garden everyday but since it was a dream I was obviously never injured really. But today” He points to the blood on the rocks, “ Today I’m bleeding”

I didn’t know what to think of this. From what he’s saying it looks like we’re trapped inside his nightmare. We had to figure out how all this happened. I suddenly hear a ping sound from my pocket and I reach inside. I take out my mobile and look at it surprised. The date and day are all blurred. The clock keeps changing the timings. None of the apps I have on my phone remain anymore. Except I just got a text……from seonghwa

“ Hyung you just texted me”

He looks down at his own pocket and fishes out his mobile and looks at the text.

Welcome to the dream realm. Currently replaying Seonghwa’s dream.

System malfunction. Trying to exit.

So they’re actually in his dream and there is something definitely wrong with it as well, judging from what they’re seeing. 

8.October 17, 2018

Mingi

23:00

I wait inside my little makeshift house staring at my dairy again. It was 11 in the night. I have to go to the building at 1 am like I do everyday. I tried to audition to become a trainee but it became very clear to me in a very short time that people like me can’t survive in a place like that. Yes I had the talent but no I didn’t have the money. I can’t afford to stay with the others and I cant afford what it takes to get into the place. I should be used to this by now. This dull ache every time I think about my family and the condition I’m in right now. I can only work as a labourer and try to survive for the rest of my life. I write for the nth time in my diary

“Living without a dream is a normal thing for a guy like me. Dreams are too lavish to the poor”

I stare at the same line for a little longer before I close my dairy and throw it away on my bed. I pack my sweatpants and a spare t-shirt, a small water bottle I take for work and some leftover bread before I lock the warehouse and walk to the building I auditioned at months ago. I go there everyday even now. And I sneak in. This has become my routine now. No one sees me get in and out of the place. I climb over the fence and get into the building. I can find my way here in the dark perfectly. I practice by myself in the dance room everyday. Dancing liberates me and I like the feeling of dancing in front of the mirrors in the room. 

October 20,2018

The past few days I’ve come here to the building it’s been eerily silent. Usually the guys never slept properly so I could always hear noises from their room but the last few days none of them have made any noise. Not that it affects me in any way but it just felt out of place. But today on my way to the dance room, I see a light behind a door of a room that was never used before. I get a little curious and stare for a little while when i heard the door creaking open and hid myself in the shadows like I’ve always done. I see a guy with blue hair walk out. He’s much shorter than myself and it looked as if he was going out to get some coffee with his empty cup. He must be a new trainee. Anyway I left as soon as he turned the corner. 

But Once the guy went back to the room I could hear all sorts of noises of him making music coming from in there and not going to lie it was some pretty dope stuff. 

9.October 21,2018

Hongjoong-

20:45

I’ve been here for a day. And no one else is in this building. I thought the manager said there were 5 people training in there but I had only seen one guy called wooyoung come in that other day but he left once he saw me. Yesterday I thought I saw another person come into the building at around 2 am but I can’t be too sure. I’ve only ever been in my room and today I wanted to explore. So I tried to find the practice room. When I did enter though I was shocked.

There was paper balls all over the floor and a broken hourglass . One of the glass pieces was stained with blood. I bend down next to the mess. The hourglass must have been extremely pretty. The wood was of great quality and the sand looked so special in the light. I couldn’t get myself to leave it lying there like that. I used to dabble in a lot of DIY stuff when I was younger so what I did do was to go ahead and collect all the pieces and take it back to my room where I started piecing it all together. 

23:16

I was almost done with putting the whole hourglass together. It was starting to look like the original beauty it was. But one thing bothered me. At the end of the wooden base was a small hook as if something was attached there and I started fiddling with it as it was bothering me. I heard a noise and looked up and almost dropped the hourglass on my table again. In front of me stood a man in all black. With a black fedora and a black mask over his face. The fedora faintly showed the ends of his blue hair and his eyes met mine and I realised I was looking at someone exactly like me who was dressed in something I would never wear. 

The man with the black fedora said,” there are countless dimensions in the world”

I blinked and When I opened my eyes, it was a dream. Next to me was the hourglass I saw for the first time and the sand in the hourglass began to flow back from the bottom to the top. 

10.October 19,2018

San-

13:21

I had many deliveries to do today. Ever since I started working in for my dad my life has been so monotonous. I take the order list my manager gives me and I strap myself in the passenger seat of the truck with my colleague and we drive to the dock yard and deliver the materials and back to our warehouse. Everyday I can’t stop thinking that I’m wasting my life. Everyday I stare out of the window and wonder what I would be like if I continued to train with my friends. I remember the promise I made Wooyoung and Yeosang. I have so many regrets that I had to stop doing what I loved. My dad was feeling better but day by day I felt my enthusiasm about my own life dimming. I didn’t look forward to anything these days. Everyday I think to myself is this really worth it? I want to change my life. I don’t want this. I want to support my dad doing what I Love . I can’t end up doing this my whole life, I have other aspirations. I continue to stare outside my window as I think of all this. 1,2,…..6 – I unconsciously start counting the cars passing by. I see a bunch of friends on the sidewalk laughing at a joke. I feel a tear run down my face. I want to go back to who I was before. I feel something inside me snap and suddenly I’ve made up my mind. At the next signal, I plan to jump of this truck and all this behind. I can’t keep lying to myself anymore. I’m tired of pretending to be okay this way. 

*San is sick of his life. When the moving car stopped for a moment at the signal,he jumped out of the car.And he ran. He ran as if his life depended on it. Because it did. And he went to the first place he could think of . The company building*

16:42

I was panting when I reached the building. I ran for too long. When I felt the adrenaline drop, the fatigue took over. I walk to the canteen and grab my favourite juice can from the vending machine and drop down on a chair outside. As I’m almost done with the drink I see a familiar someone come out of the building. It was Wooyoung but he had his bags with him and it looked like he was trying to run away from there. I called out to him

“Woo, Over here”

He looked at me for a second completely surprised and then he tried to walk away from me. I use the remaining of my strength to run behind him and catch up.

“ Why are you running away from me?”

Wooyoung- “Because I don’t want to talk right now isn’t it obvious?”

“Wooyoung what are you saying? I came here to tell you that I left the job. I’m back. I’m going to train with you and we can fulfil our promise. Where’s Yeosang?” I bombard him with all the questions in my head.

“ San its not possible forget it. They’re not here anymore”

What he says takes me completely by surprise. NO one is here anymore? Where did they all go? It wasn’t even that long since he left and now he’s hearing wooyoung say no one is there in the building anymore. 

“I want you to explain to me everything”

When wooyoung heard me say that, something inside him must have snapped because he broke down in front of me . I try to comfort him by hugging and he askes me to go to his house instead of inside the dorm. And so we walk back to his house. And he told me everything. About the hourglass, the man with the black fedora and the members disappearing.

October 21,2018

20:30

I was walking back to Wooyoung’s house today. I’ve been thinking about what he said for the past 2 days and I feel like we can’t leave this like this. I considered the members as my family and I can’t sleep normally when I know they are stuck somewhere and struggling. I want to convince Wooyoung to go back with me and find something with which we can help them. I know the first thing we need to find is the hourglass. I’m positive we can do something. I want him to agree.

11. October 21, 2018

Wooyoung-

21:12

San came to my house just now. He asked me to back with him to the building and find something to help the members. Maybe this is my chance to finally get rid of the guilt I’ve been feeling ever since the day I saw Yunho disappear in front me. Ever since that day I’ve not been able to eat or sleep. No matter how many times I tell myself the logical reasoning of why I didn’t go with them I cant help but feel the guilt in my gut. When I saw San the other day my heart dropped. Seeing him made me realise how much I’ve been lying to myself. I’ve not been fine at all. I worry about the members everyday. It didn’t take too long for San to convince me to go back with him to the building. And so we walked back there.

[whiskeyworen]

Things about me.

Feel free to skip this. It’s just personal stuff about me that I kinda want people to know about. It’s not a need, unless you ever meet me. See, I just finished reading a very long, powerful post chain about allergies, and the importance of listening when someone says “I’m sensitive to X” or “I’m allergic to Y” no matter the degree of said sensitivity and allergic reaction. My first reaction was to continue the chain, adding my own to it...but then I realized that compared to the ones I’d read, mine are exceedingly minor, and I might actually incur backblast from people forwarding the rest of the chain, because they might view me as ‘not taking it seriously’ when I actually very much do. So I decided to make this post, and put my stuff below the Keep Reading, so as not to clutter up people’s feeds or make them read something they don’t wanna. Feel free to take a gander if you’re curious, but again, it’s not a need-to-know. Not unless you ever have the (mis)fortune of meeting me in person. LOL

1: Lactose Intolerance. This is kinda generic for me. I don’t have a particularly bad reaction to milk, dairy, cheese, etc... but I do have one. It’s almost on a meter scale; the more I have, the worse I am off later. I can tolerate dairy...to a degree. I can have my ice cream, my milk, my cheese. Just not loads of it. A Cheese pizza will make me feel very sick later, even while I eat it. If I have ‘too much’, I start feeling tired, and develop head cold symptoms. Aches and pains all over, stuffy headed, and the ‘raccoon eyes’ look. If I have way too much... well, anyone with full blown LI who has a reaction knows the rest. It’s not pretty or pleasant. I didn’t know I was LI until several years ago. I only realized when I ended up cutting cheese and milk out of my diet, and I started feeling WAY better. Everyone had thought I was perpetually sick, but it turned out I was having one long, continuous reaction to my diet. The irony is, my LI reaction actually put stress on my last relationship, though neither of us knew at the time. We’d go out for dinner, or make dinner at home, and my ex was a cheese-a-holic. Cheese on everything. Lots of dairy. Just loved it. And I’d go along because, well, I too like cheese. But my body simply didn’t. And once a reaction started... You can see how it’d put a kibosh on things if a romantic dinner at home ended in one person feeling sick and just not into anything. LoL. And to be perfectly honest, if I started reaching my limit when it came to dairy and cheese, I always find myself involuntarily gagging. My body literally starts rejecting input and is like “Nope. No more dairy. Take a break. A long one. Go lie down while we sort this out.” 2: Lilies. Easter Lilies specifically, and ALL products using Lily extract, Lily oil, Lily ANYTHING. This is actually a pretty bad allergy. Once again, a case of ‘why do I feel so sick all the time’ only just around Xmas or Easter. Found out why one Easter when I brushed a hand against the pistil of an easter lily, and within a few seconds a painful welt had raised. Couple that with the fact that if I was within 20 feet of one, I’d start wheezing and gasping, my sinuses would fill and lock off, and I essentially went blind when my eyes swole up so badly and were so painfully sore. Sufficed to say, I avoid them at my workplace like the plague when the season is around, and I don’t attend church anymore. I also carefully check perfumed items for Lily extracts, as well as test them if I recieve them as a gift. If I get a reaction even once, I don’t use whatever it was I got. As a result, I don’t tend to wear strong colognes or use strongly scented soaps. It’s hard to feel good about smelling good when you can’t see properly, or your skin hurts, etc. No amount of pain is worth someone possibly maybe almost kinda noticing ‘Hey, you smell kinda nice.’ I can handle light stuff though, which is what I use. So I don’t smell like a damned yak, or a ‘I only smell like what the human body is supposed to smell like ‘ person. Bleah. 3: Aloe Barbadensis: This one was a surprise, but every encounter I’ve had with the moisturizing miracle plant has left me with sore, cracked, aching, bleeding skin. Apparently something like 10% of the population has a reaction to the stuff that’s the opposite of what does for the other 90%. I realized I was allergic to it when I was offered a hand lotion for dry skin, and it made my skin even drier, made it swell slightly, and go painful. Thinking back, I think of the times I had sunburns and someone gave me aloe gel to cool and soothe those burns...and the burns would instead feel like millions of needles after a few seconds, and were painful to AIR travelling over them. Moreso than when I stopped using the ‘coolant’ gel. I don’t ever want to think about what it’d do to my throat if I drank Aloe drinks... I know I’ve sampled some without realizing, and it made my esophagus extremely itchy. A full drink would probably make it swell shut and I’d be in the hospital. These days, I check every soap and shampoo and lotion I get for ‘Aloe barbadensis leaf juice’ and if it has it... I don’t use it.  A shame that 90% of stuff people get me out of the goodness of their hearts as gifts end up having the stuff in it. 4: Mushrooms: Not the ‘oh boy fun time’ mushrooms, though I’d probably be allergic to those too. I’m talking about Fungi in general. I’m badly allergic to grass mould, so when there’s a snowmelt outside, I gotta dose up on anti-allergy meds pretty hard. I’m also allergic to your garden variety (literally) eating mushrooms. This sucks, because my family loves things like porkchops with mushroom sauce, or steaks with sauteed mushrooms, or chili with mushrooms in it, and things like that. And it REALLY sucks for me because... I LIKE Mushrooms. When properly done, I absolutely love them. I love them in stirfry, in sautees, on pizza. But holy hell, do Mushrooms not love me back. If I eat them, I will enjoy them. and then I will have to cancel my plans for the next 18 hours, starting at the SAME HOUR I ATE THEM. Because the reaction is that fast, that brutal, and that painful. How painful? I want you to picture a spiked ball about the size of your fist. Make it nothing but glass shard spikes. Just unrelenting, fractal arranged glass shard spikes in the vague shape of a ball. Now imagine that very SLOWLY dragging its way through every inch of your gut, starting at your stomach. Over hours. People who have had kidney or urinary tract stones will know what kind of pain this is like. I can make that comparison at least, because I’ve had a stone or two in my time when I was really ill. To that spiked ball, imagine it moves one inch per hour, rotating slowly as it does so. It feels like something with claws, fangs, spikes, and blades is lacerating its way through you. I have cancelled plans because of this. Had entire days just nullified because I accidentally ate a handful of mushroom slices, or something else I ate was marinated in like, a truffle oil or had the oil from sauteed mushrooms on it or in it. At restaurants, I gently ask my server if they could find out what the source of their gravy (particularly for fries and stuff) is from. Like, specifically is it Beef or meat-based, or is it vegetable based. Most of the veggie stuff tends to use mushrooms which clearly is not good for me. They usually oblige me because a lot of places are intensely careful about allergies as long as you announce them. Sadly, I’ve had to stop Poutine-ing up my fries at my favorite restaurant, and I don’t get the gravy with my fries at work anymore, for that reason. Both are veggie-base gravy. I can handle a very small amount of mushroom or mushroom oil, but not at all much. And I don’t like trying to figure out just how much, because I don’t like feeling like I’m being eaten alive AND turned inside out by razor hooks. There are GODS out there that have heard my desperate pleas, and turned a blind eye to my plight. None of these allergies, with the exception of perhaps the Lily extract or ingesting Aloe, will ever kill me or nearly kill me. But they make life sometimes unbearable or unworkable, and always painful. Some might say I’m exaggerating my allergies, and that they aren’t that serious. Which, ironically, is especially intolerant of my support of THEIR allergies and desires to let people know how important theirs are to monitor. This has been.... stuff about me. I’m surprised if you read this far. Congrats. you now know more about me than half of my real life friends.