#which. ough. ashton i want to cradle you in my palms like a baby animal

[astralleywright]

given ashton's specific issues, it's quietly tragic that they don't have someone on team uthodurn to specifically remember them, the way orym and laudna do. fearne goes to the wildmother shrine specifically to reach out to orym, and imogen- well, thoughts of laudna run through everything imogen does. fcg is ostensibly that person, for ashton, but they've known each other for significantly less time than fearne and orym or imogen and laudna, and fcg wasn't emotionally reliant on ashton in the same way. and fcg's had his hands full with meeting frida and all the new feelings coming with that, and maybe it's an intentional reflection of the fact that, as much as they care, fcg is a little self-absorbed, and also still very bad at processing and expressing their feelings.

but when frida asks if they ever had a person like frida has deanna, they mention dancer. which is- fcg was essentially a servant to dancer, she told him what to do. ashton's place in their life is much more parallel to deanna. and i think it makes sense for fcg to mention dancer, given their own issues and belief that someone else has to give them meaning (which is something that could be very interesting to explore in their relationship with frida!!), but. ashton's definitely gonna be worried sick about fcg when we eventually get to team ???, so seeing them apparently occupy fcg's thoughts so little is sad.