#which'll take a while but it's not the end of the world lol

[violetsareblue-selfships]

good morning!! <3

[schizoidcel]

Well, it's my first time making a request besides using the translator for this, so I read that you make requests from TADC, this is the idea that's in my head.

What would happen if one of the characters started remembering little things about they life because of his reader's actions? (because he doesn't remember anything himself)

Ponmi, Ragatha and Jax (separately)

Something like example, the food that reader offered to Ponmi brings her a quick flash of that? something like that is the idea.

I like how you write by the way, good day!

# POMNI, RAGATHA & JAX (SEPERATELY) x READER WHO WAS THEIR S/O IN THE REAL WORLD (FLASHBACK EDITION) ☆

I WAS DEAD YALL SOZ just got out my eye operation I got a prosthetic now😭😭 Ngl it looks sick but uhm. It's so awkward LMFAO also my dog died while i was in the hospital.. 💁‍♀️

︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶༉‧₊˚.

🤍 HEADCANONS !!

warnings :: Not proofread, will probably have mistakes cus I can like not see with my one fake eye

♪ POMNI ..

Pomni would get a flashback after you touch her a specific way

I feel like altough she enjoys it from time to time (Albeit only from you), Pomni is still sensitive to touch

So when you first attempted to comfort her, she SWORE she saw something flash before her eyes

She kinda got stunned after this happened

And you were confused .

Her eyes were in that blank white state

And you didn't know whether to be more concerned than before or not 😭

She quickly regained herself though

... And said "I saw something." subconciously

When you asked her what, she didn't know whather to tell you or not, but since you're you, she decided she might aswell

You were kinda confused by this, and didn't really know what to react with, so you just said:

"What if we were together in the real world too lol"

You now got urself an "out of the zone" Pomni for the next few days, congrats bestie!

♪ RAGATHA ..

Ragatha would get a flashback after you call her a nickname you using a nickname you always used to call her back in the real world

I feel like she wouldn't tell you immediately, though

She probably thinks she's going crazy or something, and if that's so, she dosen't want to make it worse by telling it to you which might make you worry

Though, if you were like BORDERLINE INSANE about escaping like Pomni she would be stuck with telling you asap or never telling you at all.

Ragatha thinks that since she thinks it's a memory from the outside world, you might want to hear it

But also it might make you more keen on getting outside which'll probably cause you to abstract.

Or it'll make you overthink like crazy

In the end, she'd probably wait till it happens again so she can tell you

♪ JAX ..

I feel like jax would get a quick flash after you play a prank on him back

He'd also be like. 🧍 for a second

"Jax? 😟" "🧍" "OH not sorry lol anyway"

I feel like he'd never tell you LMFAO

He feels like that if he ever told you, you'd either be really understanding or tease him for the rest of his digital life.

And he is NOT taking the risk

Look he trusts you, but you know how yall act around eachother

And Jax LOVES always having the upper hand

Even thinking about a scenario where he's just fucking around with you and all of a sudden you go:

"Lol didn't you zone out in public for 13 seconds and thought about how we apparently we were together in the real world?? Cheesy hoe"

It gives him shivers .

If he got it often enough to the point it's bothering him and making him think that he NEEDS to tell someone, he'll come to you though

Jax also thinks about how he probably thought too much back when it first happened

Because even after he told you about the "flashbacks", you didn't tease him about it.

Yet.

︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶༉‧₊˚.

I feel like this turned out kinda short... Whatevs 😭 Hope u like it!!

ׂૢ་༘࿐ Thank you for reading! ♡

[yume-x-hanabi]

So, bit of a life update because it's been... almost two months? since I last properly logged here (I had some stuff in the queue, but I think it ran out after a while, woops). Getting a bit personal, so the rest is under cut.

Honestly the main reasons are simply, I'm busy, and exhausted. Not a good combination lol

I haven't had proper relaxing time for me since at least a year and a half. Summer holidays are supposed to be the time when I can finally relax responsibility-free for a month and a half to get over usually hectic second semesters. Except last July my grandma had a fall, and while she's fine, long story short she's now in a nursing home and we spent the whole summer and lots of free time during the following months clearing her house (which was. a mess).

On top of that I'd bought an apartment (yay) in a building that's still under construction, and while that's great because it means I could customize it the way I want, it also meant spending a lot of time going here and there to choose floorings, furniture, and lots appointments (bank, notary...) etc etc. And now that it's in the final stage we're running into issues because the notaries aren't agreeing about some conditions, so the deed signing date recently had to be postponed, which'll leave me very little time to schedule the actual move (I have to be out of my current place by the end of the month). Super stressful. And also busy--spent nearly two days last week playing telephone game with the developer, the notary's office, the bank... and we still haven't solved the issue as of now orz

On top of that, this past school year has been super intense, I took on more admin responsibilities, which, while fun, consume a lot of time and focus, which put me behind on my regular class prep and grading, which just generally added to the mental load. Also I had to take lessons on Saturday mornings for my teaching certificate, which is also something that ate into my time and energy this year.

This all kinda came crashing down on me in early June when I just... kinda shut down for about two weeks. I had 4 super important tasks/projects to do, and for those two weeks I made progress on none of them. I just kinda froze, not knowing where to start, and my focus was allllll over the place, could not keep it on one thing for the life of me (there may or may not be suspicion of adhd at play, I'll have to look into it more and see someone about it, but... no time atm orz)

I managed to pull through in the end (well, one of the things is postponed to August so I have more time to do it thankfully), but I'm completely mentally exhausted. So yeah, I kinda gave up checking tumblr for a while, bc I just didn't have the mental capacity for that.

In happier news Missy is still as silly as ever, my niece is the cutest, I got a baby blahaj yesterday to go with my big one, Dreamcatcher's new mini-album is wonderful, and once everything is solved and I can move in it'll be awesome to live in my own place. Also I went to TwoSetViolin's world tour show in Berlin last week-end and it was awesome :D (might make a separate post about it later)

And now I need to start packing. Gonna be a busy month again 😅

[acaciapines]

omg your daemon takes are so galaxy brained--your w359 au fundamentally changed the way i look at daemons as a concept, and I absolutely ADORE all your posts about the upcoming toh daemon au!! (seriously SO excited for that thing). even in hdm don't take full advantage of the idea of an other-half daemon soul like you do, and I love the themes of personhood and identity you explore in your work. it's really informed how I think about and write my own daemon aus.

kjnkdfjgdfg aww thank you!!! the w359 daemon au for me was the first really big daemon au i ever wrote so i see it as something of a defining moment for me...im still very proud of it.

and YEAH im sure you can tell but im excited TOO it'll be a while until it comes out (my goal is to be done writing it by like, the end of summer 2024. but this says nothing of editing lol which'll add a bit of time. i want to start posting it before 2025 tho, like, fall-winter 2024? hopefully?) but i am SO SO excited and i want to talk about it to literally everyone i know lol, it's the longest thing i've ever written that im actually proud of.

also it'll be my life for many years to come dknfgdfg i havent done the math yet but even still assuming i post a chapter a week it'll take AT MINIMUM a year to post the entire thing.

oh HARD agree there im actually lowkey a hdm hater dfkmlgdfg like not really overall i enjoyed the books but they never really focused on the part of the world i was most drawn to, namely the daemons, and the stuff that was shown just. i never felt very drawn to.

im so happy i was able to inspire your own daemon aus!!! thats truly my biggest joy as a writer, just. knowing stuff i wrote got other people to write as well.

<3

[johnnyscancerstick]

Chap. 9

Warnings: feels, death, cursing.

Characters: Dallas Winston, Johnny Cade, Ponyboy Curtis, and a few random doctors and policemen.

Notes: @watermelon-chapstick , this is what I was talking about. I should let y'all know it takes a lot to make me cry. Teared up while writing this, and I think that means it's good enough to post. Lol, I'm well aware this was meant to be a shitpost, but I don't care. I wanted to write something feelsy and you damn know well I did and tried my best. I might make more of these in the future if people like this. Or, if people want more. I decided to post it on my own, not just a repost. I still put a lot of time into it, and I wanted it on my blog on it's own! This extra note is the only thing that's different — I didn't change anything else.

Word count: 1903

As quickly as it had started, it was over. Had this really happened? Or is it some fucking fever dream because of all the painkillers those hospital people had given me? No, it couldn't be. Dreams can't simulate this kind of stuff, we just beat the Socs!

‘I can't beleive they were gonna do this without me,’ that's not the only reason I wanted to do this, that's not the only reason I threatened to stab a bitch. Multiple. It was the only one I wanted to beleive but I know it's not.

I look down at Ponyboy, who was bleeding like hell and the rest of him looked even worse. He couldn't have been used to fighting solo, clearly. I shook my head, not going to ignore the situation any longer. I could miss my chance if I did that. I bent down and grabbed his collar, turning and yanking him up a bit after I started on a dead run. “Come on!” I couldn't hear myself. “We're goin' to see Johnny.”

Pony wasn't in any shape to be running but I could just remember Johnny's voice. He wanted to see everyone, but I knew there wasn't time. Ponyboy, if he could choose anyone to see it'd be him, wouldn't it? They were such good friends, and he's the one that will cooperate the most. Goddamnit, move faster! “Hurry! He was gettin' worse when I left.” don't think about that. “He wants to see you.”

I'd taken Buck's T-bird here and I didn't plan to go any slower than 110 to get back to the hospital. I got into the driver's seat and rhe second Pony was halfway in he car, I got into gear and slammed on the gas. I almost hydroplaned it across a curve and then I heard the sirins. Great, out of all the times. Think of something, Winston, think of something.

I don't even turn to the boy in the passenger's seat, but I find myself slowing down the car. “Look sick.” I say stiffly, furrowing my brows and narrowing my eyes. This could work, I don't have time for a police chase right now. “I'll say I'm taking you to the hospital, which'll be truth enough.”

The policeman said something like ‘Where's the fire.’ I wasn't paying attention. I glanced at him, I cant express how mad I was that he was slowing us down. Johnny only has so long!

“The kid.” I stayed cool, or at least I think I did, pointing at Pony. “He fell over on his motorcycle and I'm takin' him to he hospital.” Pony groaned a little, and I can't tell why.

The guy by the window looked nervous and glory, this was taking too long. “Is he real bad? Do you need an escort?” Oh, hell yeah, this could work. “How would I know if he's bar or not? I ain't no doc.” I fight a smile at how good this worked out. “Yeah, we could use an escort.”

The fuzz are really stupid, these days! “Sucker!” I hiss, he went back to his car. Now we didn't have to worry about traffic, or other cops. I don't know what I was mumbling about that entire ride there, I know I was talking about Johnny.

Once we were at the hospital I slammed the door shut and ‘helped’ Pony out of the car, but the second that police officer left, we were gone down that hallway. I heard yelling but I didn't even acknowlage them, I couldn't think of anything but Johnny, to the point where I let Pony's wrist go and I know he fell far behind. I didn't have time for an elevator, I raced up the stairs and almost clipped a wall a few times.

It felt like an eternity but I finally got to Johnny's room and I was going to break down the door if it wouldn't open. “I'm sorry, boys, but he's dying.” just those words sent horrible aches in my heart and I felt my chest tighten.

No, no, no. This isn't happening, he's not dying, he's not! Johnny can't die, he can't, this can't be happening. I take out Two's switch, whipping my head toward the doctor and jabbing it in his face. I didn't flick it open until I opened my mouth and started talking. “We gotta see him.” I said, my tone scared me even more than I already was, I hadn't heard myself like ths in a long time. I cleared my throat, furrowing my brows. I tried to be intimidating, I'd never had trouble with this before but now I was all trembly and it was visible, I could barely keep my hand still. “We're gonna see him and if you give me any static, you'll end up on your own operatin' table.” I sneer, I tried my best to keep my voice down.

This dude didn't even bat an eye, the little... Oh how I wanted to tell him off, I wanted to tell him just how much I needed to get into that room.

But he took me by surprise. “You can see him, but it's because you're his friends, not because of that knife.” I wasn't going to press, he was letting me in and for once I didn't want to fight. I put the switch back in my pocket and pushed the door open, I ran only for a few seconds before I swore something stopped me. I stumbled forward and made sure I didn't fall, and I could see Pony walk into the room out of the corner of my eye.

Johnny was white and looked still, I couldn't tell if he was breathing or not and I felt tears well up in my eyes. I gritted my teeth and shut them tight, it's not the end! Johnny isn't dead, he's not! He's just.. He's just asleep, he'll wake up any minute now. I took a few steps forward and wiped the sweat off my lips, “Johnnycake..?” my voice was low and hoarse, and I couldn't see even though it opened my eyes. I could barely hear anything else, everything else was shut off and didn't exist at that moment. Nothing was real, this wasn't what was going on. This really can't be happening.

Johnny didn't respond and I had to say something else. I had to prompt him again, this isn't how this ends. “Johnny...” I felt the hope drain from my whole body, but that little bit came up again when he moved. “hey..” his voice, god, that tore through my soul harder than anything else had.

I walked toward him after glancing at the Christopher around my neck, “We won.” I was out of breath and it was hard to get it back, I couldn't comprehend this and I just wanted to get him to say something. “We beat the Socs. We stomped them—chased them outa our territory.” I said, I was desperate at this point. Johnny's eyes were barely open and I couldn't tell if he could see the tears welling. I bit my lip as he just gave an unsatisfied hum, “Useless...” he croaked, “Fighting's no good...” he was so white, and I felt panic rising within me again.

No, he's dying and this isn't going to be the last thing I say to him! I gotta tell him something, something that'll make him smile, I've been keeping so much in about him all this time, how hard would it be to tell him now? When I literally have no other chance..!

I licked my lips and tried to find my voice through all the emotion, “They're still writing editorials about you in the paper. For being a hero and all.” I tried to keep my voice calm, I didn't let it break, I didn't want to cry in front of him. That would make this even worse, that would make him feel awful, that would just be the worst thing I could do right now. “Yeah..” he hadn't responded yet but for the sake of my sanity I had to act as if he did, “They're calling you a hero now and heroizin' all the greasers.”

I couldn't say it, I just couldn't, it was too hard, I tried so hard but I couldn't.. Hopefully he'll get he message. “We're all proud of you, buddy...” I managed a smile, I felt hot tears run down my face. I tries to wipe them off, but they'd just look like dweat and I wasn't going to take my eyes off Johnnycakes.

He looked so happy, his eyes lit up. I let out a half sob and kept my composure, I took a deep breath and was about to day something else, but he spoke. “Ponyboy.”

I backed up. I wasn't going to take it away, I'd forgotten Pony was there. I'd forgotten anyone was there. Johnny wanted to talk to Pony, he'd already talked to me, danmit I'm so selfish.

I don't know what he said but as I stepped closer, he just...

I broke into a grin and felt more tears fall down my cheeks. I was trembling, I could barely keep myself up, I felt like the world spun around me and for some reason, I wanted to laugh.

I reached a shaky hand over and brushed his bangs off his forehead, “Never could keep that hair back.” I could hear I was under pronouncing any soft sounds and I saw everything blur around me. “That's what you get for tryin' to help people, you little punk...” reality was setting in and I found it hard to breathe. Johnny wasn't... He.... He was.. He's not.. No. He's fine, Johnny is fine, nothing happened, nothing's wrong. I took a quivering breath, the smile faltering. I tried and I tried to keep it up, I know this wasn't what was going on, I know he's... But no, no I won't believe this. This is NOT what's happening, it's not it's.. It's not... It can't be... Johnny can't be dead, oh he really can't be... “There what you get..” I couldn't get the words out, I whipped toward the wall and punched it as hard as I could.

“Damnit Johnny..” I didn't have the energy, I couldn't have screamed if I wanted to. I ground my fist and hit the wall again, grinding my teeth and trying to do anything but think of him.

Don't think of how he used to be

Don't think of what happened

Don't think of what happened to him behind closed doors

Don't think of what he did for those kids

Don't think of him not wanting to die

Don't think of him only being sixteen

Don't think of him never leaving Tulsa

Don't think of him...

“Oh, damnit, Johnny...”

Don't think of those mocha eyes and how they lit up whenever I smiled at him.

“Don't die..”

Don't think of how brave, persistent, and strong he was-

Don't think of how brave, persistent, and strong he is

“Please,”

Don't think of how he would have turned out.

Don't think of how good of a person he would have ended up being.

Don't think of all the things I could have told him

Don't think of all the things thst would have made him happy, thst would have made him smile.

“Don't die...”