#which u know glad neither of us needed the toilet for that half hour

[chronicowboy]

nothing will ever make you quite as humbly and painfully aware of your femininity as talking to a builder

[lolzcollz]

H U S K Y

“You need to stop moping and get the fuck back out there, girl!” I heard Tiffany yell from the bedroom. I flushed the toilet and didn’t bother to wash my hands.

“I don’t know, Tiff, it’s only been three weeks.” Three weeks ago my boyfriend, Josh, dumped me. I wasn’t expecting it at all. Apparently he linked up with an old high school fling of his and realized the spark was still there so out goes me and in comes Becca. We weren’t dating that long. Only a year or so but I was still heart broken and Tiffany wanted me to get back in the dating scene? No chance.

“Three weeks is plenty of healing time. They say you need one day for each week you dated someone to heal from it. Let’s see, you dated for what, a year?” I nodded. “So, fifty two weeks…” Tiffany started doing the mental math.

“Based on that, I still need roughly four and a half more weeks of moping.” I flopped down on my bed.

“Forget what I said! You need to get out of your house, at least. It’s looking a little…unruly lately.” She looked around the room and made a stank face.

“Fine, let’s go out.” Tiffany squealed with delight. “On Friday.” She stopped her celebration.

“Friday? But it’s only Monday!” She complained.

“Don’t push it. Friday or nothing.” I threatened.

Friday came a lot sooner than I had thought it would. When I logged off my computer at the end of the day and left work I was dreading going out. I tried to think of the different ways I could bail without Tiffany absolutely hating me for it. Almost as if she knew I was thinking of bailing, Tiffany called me.

“Friday!” She screamed at me. I couldn’t help but laugh. Tiffany was my best friend and she always knew what I needed most. “I’ll be at your house in an hour and then we’ll go to dinner and get drinks and then we’re going dancing tonight!” The excitement in her voice made me forget all about bailing. I was actually kind of excited now too.

True to her word, Tiffany knocked on my door an hour later. She dragged me out of the doorway as soon as I opened it, as if she was afraid if I didn’t leave right then that I would get sucked back up into bed which was probably true. I hopped in the passenger side of her car and we were off to downtown. There was this Mexican place we both really loved. It was our go to for whenever we went out to dinner. We ordered a pitcher of margaritas to share and when I was feeling nice and loose, Tiffany started lecturing again.

“I’m just saying, Brit, I think you need to get back out there. There’s no point in moping around. Josh sucks, he’s an ass and you deserve better!” The tequila had wormed its way inside my brain and what she said started to make sense.

“Maybe…maybe you’re right.” I admitted. Her eyes grew wide and eyebrows shot up to her hair line.

“I’m right?” She asked, dumbfounded.

“You’re right.” I had decided. And she was right. Josh wasn’t worth the moping I had been doing. I spent too much time and energy on missing someone who couldn’t even be bothered to dump me in person? Fuck that. “So how should I get back out there?”

“I’m glad you asked!” She said pulling out her phone. “You know those dating apps that are specifically targeted at a certain group? Plenty of Fish for the Jesus freaks, Farmers Only for farmers and Sizzl is for people who love bacon?”

“Wait is that last one real?” I asked.

“Very. Anyway, there’s an app I just started using called HSKY. It’s basically lumberjack looking dudes who are all very hot.” She turned her phone to me to let me look. The guy on the screen was really hot. He was, well, husky just as the app described.

“I could be into this.” I told her.

“I knew you would be.” She winked at me as our food arrived and we chowed down.

The rest of the night was just as I expected, we got wasted. We ended up having to leave Tiff’s car in town and Uber back to mine since I lived closer and she crashed at my house. The next morning we were both hungover and decided to order some food for breakfast and just chill and watch a movie. While we did all this, I had downloaded the HSKY app and I was happily swiping away.

“Why are you smiling at your phone and not paying attention? This is when the unsuspecting girl gets murdered! It’s the best part!” Tiffany asked me during the movie.

“Sorry, I’m talking to a guy on HSKY.” I explained. Tiffany grabbed the remote and paused the movie. I looked up at the screen and the unsuspecting girl as Tiffany called her was tied up to a bed, blood soaked her clothes and sheets.

“What’s his name?” Tiffany got up from her couch and sat down next to me on my couch.

“His name is Ryan.” I showed her his profile.

“He’s so cute!” Tiffany said. She swiped through his pictures and read his bio. “’I’m an outdoorsy guy and family means everything to me.’ Hm he sounds kinda boring but whatevs he’ll do!” She handed me the phone back.

“He’s really sweet so far.” I felt defensive.

“When are you guys gonna hang out?” Tiffany asked.

“We’re talking about grabbing a drink tonight, actually.” I told her slightly embarrassed.

“Tonight!?” Tiffany was surprised. “You move fast, girl! Hell yeah!” She cheered me on. “Get that fuckin dick! Get that husky dick!” She got up and mimicked slapping someone’s ass.

“Tiff, oh my God.” I laughed at her.

“Let’s finish the movie and then pick out an outfit for your date tonight.” She pressed play and we did as she said. When the movie was over we went upstairs to my room.

Tiffany stood in my closet and looked at my clothes. “So you’re definitely going out with him tonight?”

“Yes. We just confirmed we’re going to meet at Red Spot at eight.” I checked my phone to see if he had said anything else but I had no new messages.

“Red Spot, huh? Fancy!” Tiffany was impressed. “So we need something nice but not too nice. Hm…” She pulled out a black dress I hadn’t worn in years. “This could work.” She held it out to me.

“I forgot I had that in there.” I grabbed the dress from her and slipped it off the hanger and onto my body.

“Yup, that’s the one.” She declared. “You’ll get dick tonight for sure.”

“Tiff! It’s not about getting dick. I’m going to get drinks, not dick.” I told her.

“That’s what they all say.” She said. “I’m gonna get out of your hair and you should probably wash yours before your date. Have fun tonight and don’t get murdered!” Tiffany gave me a hug and left. I still had three hours before I was meeting Ryan so I decided to take Tiff’s advice and got in the shower. I took my time, making sure to shave everything. Even though I said I wasn’t going to get dick tonight, Tiff was right, that’s what they all say. It was better to be shaved than sorry.

The time finally came to leave to get to Red Spot at eight. I got an Uber there just to be safe since I didn’t want a repeat of last night and have to leave a car in town overnight. When my Uber driver pulled up to the front of the building my heart started racing. I hadn’t realized how nervous I was. My palms were hot and sweaty and I could feel my cheeks growing red. I took two deep breaths and got out of the car. I walked into Red Spot and standing by the hostess stand was Ryan. He looked exactly like his pictures which I silently thanked God for. He turned around as I walked in the door and smiled at me.

“Brittney?” He asked. He held out his hand to shake.

“Hi.” I accepted his hand despite my sweaty palms and shook his hand with as much false confidence I could muster. The hostess brought us to our table and Ryan pulled out my chair for me. My heart fluttered at the act. After we ordered drinks, Ryan broke the uncomfortable silence.

“So, what kind of work do you do?” It was a mundane question but it got us off on the right foot because we didn’t stop talking the whole night. When Red Spot was closing up we started to get some nasty looks from the servers indicating to us that we were no longer welcome and should probably get going now.

“Looks like the servers want us to leave.” I told Ryan.

“Oh wow, yeah. Are they giving us death glares?” He asked under his breath.

“They are for sure giving us death glares.” I laughed. We got up from our table and walked out of the restaurant. When we were out on the street and looked at each other, neither seemed to know what the next move should be. The spark between us was real and the alcohol had me feeling kind of horny.

“So, should we go somewhere a little less…private?” I asked him. I didn’t know what came over me. I was usually never that direct with someone. His eyes widened at my suggestion and then a smirk came over his face and his eyes relaxed.

“I think we definitely should.” He grabbed my hand and we started walking. He told me his apartment was nearby and if I didn’t mind we could go there. Not a single part of me minded. It felt like an hour walk because every nerve ending on my body was firing at full at the thought of Ryan naked but it only ended up being a ten minute walk.

We sat down in his living room and he asked me if I wanted a drink. I figured we already got this far, what’s one more? He went into the kitchen and came back with two identical looking glasses. I took a sip of mine and asked him what it was.

“Oh, just a specialty drink of mine. I created it myself.” He smiled at me. I drank another sip and the all the booze from tonight and last night hit me. I felt dizzy and nauseous.

“I don’t feel too great. Maybe I shouldn’t drink anymore.” I admitted. My head felt like it was in the clouds. I couldn’t focus on anything for too long.

“Are you okay?” Ryan asked me. “You should lie down.” He took my feet and swung them up on the couch so I was horizontal. The last thing I saw was Ryan looking down at me with a smile on his face that made my blood run cold.

When I woke up my eyes were blurred. I blinked a couple times trying to focus my sight. I saw a room that was unfamiliar to me and remembered I went home with Ryan the night before. I couldn’t remember much after we got back here, just drinking a couple sips of whatever Ryan had made and then getting really dizzy. I played back what happened in my head trying to make sense of it. My eyes finally cleared and I could see where I was better now.  I felt a pressure on my wrists and realized both my wrists were tied to the bed posts. I yanked on them to see if they’d budge but they remained tied. Panic started to seep into my body. What was happening? Why was I tied to this bed? Where was Ryan?

At the last thought Ryan walked into the bedroom. He was fully naked and his penis was erect. He smiled at me and played with something behind his back.

“Ryan?” I asked. “What’s going on?”

“You know you shouldn’t be so trusting on a first date.” He told me. He walked closer to the bed and pulled whatever was in his hands out from behind his back. The kitchen knife gleamed in the early morning sun and blinded me for a second. I felt the knife go into my stomach and when Ryan pulled it back out, warmth spread out around me.

        10.7.2019

Colleen Burke