#which sort of detracts from the viewing experience

[jakeperalta]

no more three hour movies we have evolved past the need for three hour movies

[biocheminpics]

The Houston Museum of Natural Science

I'm a big fan of Science Museums. The collections carried by museums are incredibly important to science (particularly paleontology, archeology, etc). So when I found myself in Houston for a day with a few hours to burn, I decided hey, let's check out the museum.

Note: I purchased the student, permanent exhibit ticket. So I cannot comment on the special exibits.

But I left a bit disappointed. In the end, the museum felt well stocked but poorly executed.

First, let me dole out my complements. The collection they possess is very impressive. The Dino hall had an impressive number of complete skeletons; there was an entire exhibit of sea shells; the mineral collection was pretty good; the archeological pieces from the North American indigenous civilizations and the ancient Egyptian civilization were numerous. They had a lot to work with.

However, almost every exhibit felt like it was trying to be an art gallery more than a museum (the dino hall and the minerals were among the worst offenders). The exhibits were also very child-unfriendly, with many of the pieces completely unprotected. They were very much trying to sell an experience more than educate. There were three separate gift shops one of which was a main entrance (though, to be fair, I expect this is as much a result of poor funding as it is poor form). Let me explain further by going floor by floor.

The lower floor: Uh, Houston. We have a problem.

The space exhibit was a small hall with some scale models of craft, a few suits, and a mercury era capsule (an actual capsule, not a replica). That's it. Humanity's greatest achievement on lackluster display. Took me literally 5 minutes to view the entire collection. For the city that's arguably the most associated with the space program, I expected more.

The first floor: dinosaur, an art form.

The first floor was partially under construction so I'll give that a bit of a pass. But the life history/dinosaur hall was really frustrating. First, it was poorly lit and confusingly laid out. If you wanted to view everything in order, you had to double back at several points. The labeling was also very poorly executed. Individual fossils weren't clearly marked, information plaques were white with small font (which in the low light were hard to find). Smaller fossils were displayed like paintings while the dinosaurs were displayed like sculptures. Seriously, the dinosaurs were on these weird white islands with lighting under them, devoid of any diorama-like scenery (see photo). It was odd.

But the most egregious thing, in my opinion, was the inaccuracies in the human evolution section. Weirdly, they were concerning homo neanderthalensis each time. They mentioned Neanderthals in a few seperate places and each time listed a different time range. And on one timeline, there was shown a considerable time gap between h. sapiens and h. neandertalensis, despite the two having considerable overlap. This is a huge oversight.

The second floor: a cabinet of curious display choices.

The second floor contained animal dioramas, the seashell exhibit, the gemstone and mineral exhibit, and the, "Morian Cabnet of Curiosities." Apart from the seashells (which were in a very well-organized, well-informed exhibit), this entire floor was simply disappointing. The animal dioramas were pretty good, but very poorly lit. I felt it really detracted from the displays. The Morian Cabnet of Curiosities was a homage to the private museum-like collections that were kept by the gentry of ages past. While it was entertaining, I felt the pieces could have been viewed better if placed in proper exhibits. It also felt a bit to be glorifying a sort of imperial/colonial, take-and-display mindset of yesteryear that really has no place in modern museums.

Honestly, the biggest disappointment on this floor was the mineral and gem exhibit. As a chemist, I find minerals really fascinating. So when I see a mineral exhibit in a museum, I go in expecting to see at least non-specific metal complex names listed by the minerals being displayed. No such luck here. There was literally nothing of educational value in the entire exhibit. The whole thing was like a gemstone exhibit I would expect at a jewelry gallery. Dark room with artfully lit pieces on black satin, common names and places of origin listed. Nothing else. If I had not already had a pretty broad understanding of minerals, I would have left knowing literally nothing. The gems were also just disappointing. Several had large, visible scratches and others were covered in layers of dust. Honestly, appalling.

The third floor: a thin layer of whitewash.

The third floor contained an exhibit on the native peoples of North America and one on ancient Egypt. The Egypt one was very well stocked and incredibly well designed, visually. The information (as far as I could tell) was also accurate. Only major gripes I had were the very slight glorification of the same take-and-display mindset I mentioned earlier and the reinforcement of common Egyptian-based cinema stereotypes (music and imagry mostly). Also, Sobek was nowhere to be found, much to my personal disappointment.

To their credit, the NA peoples exhibit is clearly trying to do right by the cultures discussed. However, I felt the language used in some aspects minimized the history these cultures have been put through.

The forth floor: brought to you buy the ENTIRE FUCKING PETROLIUM INDUSTRY

Before I tear into this, let me be absolutely clear: the extraction of petroleum from the earth is a vital, necessary industry. It's pursuit has truly been beneficial to humanity in a number of ways. Similarly, the energy industry is an absolutly vital part of human civilization.

HOWTHEFUCKEVER

It is my honest opinion that petroleum is a resource we're squandering by simply burning it. We can do so much more with it as a chemical stock for making shit than we can just mindlessly setting it on fire (and destroying the planet in the process). And with access to far safer and renewable forms of energy (nuclear, geothermal, solar, wind, hydroelectric) at this point burning shit to produce energy is just mind-numbingly vacuous.

So imagine my frustration when I arrive at the fourth floor and see nothing but a glorified marketing campaign for every oil company on this forsaken rock. They called it the, "Wiess Energy hall," but it really was just the petroleum industry on parade. There was a tiny section describing the various renewable energy resources on boring displays. And not a single explanation on nuclear fission power, anywhere. Literally the only place I saw it was in one spot in a diorama detailing the energy sources in a city. Meanwhile there were dioramas of oil rigs, models of generators, an inspiring statue of an oil worker, interactive displays of deep-sea drilling, whole-ass holograms in a diorama of a coal mine, interactive displays showing how oil is separated, vr rides for exploring aspects of the industry, and a host of other superficially really cool exhibits glorifying the continued destruction of the planet. But hey, they did include one single fucking sentence mentioning climate change. So they're being responsible, right? And at every fucking one of these displays, "provided by generous donations from [insert oil family/company here]." It was abundantly clear that this was bought and paid for by the oil industry.

For some reason, the whole thing gave the same energy (pun fully intend) as this line from Jurassic Park:

Final words.

The Houston Museum of Natural Science is a paradoxical crossroads where a first rate collection meets a failure of design and management. It's absolutely clear to me that the entire institution has forgone the idea of educating its guests in favor of entertaining them with curosities that glorify the less-than-noble aspects of science's history. One should expect to leave a museum with some amount of new knowledge. But I expect most leave having only learned how to drill for oil.

[onewomancitadel]

I think what people really mean by Twitter being 2015!Tumblr is that the age demographic of Tumblr has changed (based on polls, I think the age group with the biggest user size is early-mid twenties), a lot of shitstirrers left for Twitter in the Purge of 2018, a lot of guys who used Tumblr for p*rn also left in 2018 (seriously, when I interacted with a guy at uni once who wanted in my pants I mentioned Tumblr because I am socially inept and he was like, oh the website for p*rn? *smirk* and I was like no I use it for my Reylos... he was wearing a Star Wars t-shirt, it's a long story) and obviously in general anybody else who used it for that reason also left, but you know exactly what sort of demographic I'm talking about - far be it from me to unturn that stone, I understand it's a mixed issue - and then overall you've got the fact that Tumblr is slightly better than it was, but it's not perfect.

I do think platform culture influences the way people interact with each other, and there are definitely ways you can fit somebody's interaction patterns into a typology - but the style of detraction you might see in Reddit comments is exactly the stuff you see on Twitter and it is the thing you encounter on Tumblr. Because Tumblr allows you to run your own personal blog, though, you have much more control over your interaction style. If Reddit is a free debate space, Tumblr is curated by comparison.

But it's also just a human nature thing lol. There are plenty of teenagers who have growing up to do on here (I was one of them) and you see a lot more on platforms popular with teenagers (Tik Tok, Twitter, Instagram) which changes the site culture. But I also think that teenagers need their own space to be edgy and get the angst out of the way. It's just much harder to do that when the platforms they're on also encourage putting your face, name, where you live etc. on it.

I find it a fascinating question because I don't think the Internet is wholly iredeemable and clearly we get some joy out of it - the things which concern me about the Internet have parts to do with social media and some not. I want to know what it is that makes Tumblr a pleasant site to use for hobbyist purposes. I can write longform posts, and consider topics which interest me, and curate my experience - by in large the the site has a slightly more mature userbase...

I also had on my mind recently how hard it is to write posts where you have people coming to you with the worst interpretation of what you've said. I think I am starting to accept again that I can't control that and people will read into what I'm saying because that's what they're looking for. That's something which still happens on Tumblr. It's a product of the Internet medium where it's very hard to clarify something you've said the way you could mid-conversation, and the fact that generally people are quite defensive. It feels like a combative space at times.

The real point I'm sort of trying to make is that like, part of what makes Tumblr a good platform is a consequence of its medium - it's a microblogging website - and part of it is a consequence of the userbase evolving. But I also think that loyal userbase is a consequence of what it offers in contrast to what others don't. Equally, issues with Tumblr aren't necessarily specific to platform, and I'd go so far as to venture that to be true of other social media websites. It's just very apparent that there are very bad decisions being made with them killing all user goodwill and reason to use them, but the myopic eye of short-term gains does not care for long-term growth and stability. It's a pretty sobering realisation to know that most of those guys up there think you're as dumb as a rock and will just take what you get. It's not some big conspiracy. They just think their site users are dumb. It's a pretty haunting and narrow view of humanity lol. There is no honour in it and yeah, it is actually nonsensical even from the view of a capitalist philosophy, because why would you willingly kill something with great brand and cultural foothold? Why would you abandon something that makes the platform what it is? This goes for Tumblr with its changes to the dashboard from Following (seeing things your followers post) to For You (algorithm).

[lesbionia]

hi! i hope i’m not bothering, i have a question but you’re totally free to ignore me.

though i definitely do not agree on the general radfem view on trans people, i’ve been informing myself about this ideology for a while now and have found myself agreeing with most of it. it has really opened my eyes about make-up and shaving and other issues as these. i was just wondering where should one draw the line? me personally i like my face much less w/o plucked eyebrows, and all the men i know also pluck theirs. i’ve stopped shaving my legs and all, but i can’t let go of the eyebrows, and though i’m working on being okay with my upper lip hair, i don’t think i’ll ever make peace with the eyebrow thing. does that make me a hypocrite? is it inherently anti-feminist to pluck eyebrows in the same way shaving legs and arms is?

i was also wondering about make-up. i’ve totally ditched foundation/concealer/conturing, and i try to go out w/o eyeliner and mascara as much as i can. but i still feel like i’m giving up a way of self-expression? i was always planning on learning eyeshadow and such. is there a way to do make-up w/o adhering the patriarchy? especially as somebody who is considering calling herself a femme, how do i understand what kind of femininity i’ve inherited from the patriarchy opposed to the kind i actually do like? and even if i do like it, can i do it in a way that doesn’t hurt other women?

also, still as a possible femme/fem sapphic, is it anti-feminist to try and make myself attractive to other women with clothes and make-up? because men are also going to see me and think it’s for them? and it’ll affect women who don’t want to wear make-up/dress a certain way?

i’m just confused about these parts of the anti-beauty/make-up ideology (which i totally agree with).

thank you for your time! there are plenty of radfem blogs i could ask but i wanted a perspective from somebody gay who had some sort of experience with butch/femme identities.

Hi! Not a bother at all, thank you for your questions. I'm sure some radical feminists will probably feel differently about these than I do, but I will share my thoughts and welcome differing opinions. 

Personally, I don't know that it's helpful to draw hard lines on these types of issues. I think it's very easy to get caught in the weeds and that detracts from more important things. Moreover, stressing over whether you're doing feminism perfectly is draining and counterintuitive; we want women to have more energy, not less. I think that even the most radical of women give into social pressures from time to time because shit is NOT easy, but we get back up and keep striving to make good choices for ourselves and the women around us. 

The reason radical feminists oppose the beauty industry generally has to do with the fact that it exploits women. It guilts them into thinking they are hideous and in need of fixing, then robs them of their time, energy, and money. So if you're focusing on rejecting harmful messaging and preserving your time and energy, I think you're doing many of the right things. I find it hard to advise on the brow situation because I do pluck a few rogue hairs from time to time and I set them in place with gel often, so I guess I'm not a "perfect" feminist in that respect either. But I have worked hard to embrace my natural (bushy) brow shape and I don't think that this one thing undermines that work or my feminism. 

I don't really know how to address the question of self-expression because I'm not entirely sure what makeup expresses tbh. If the expression you have in mind looks like conforming to conventional standards of beauty, then it's not really an individual expression that is unique to you. Is what you are seeking really self expression, or are you just wanting to see what the hype is about? I don't think curiosity about makeup (or most things) is a crime, but if you start doing makeup and it becomes a regular thing, it may get hard to stop if you receive a lot of positive reinforcement ("omg you look so good today, did you do something different?"). You also may start to feel dissatisfied with your natural appearance, which is something the makeup industry very consciously sets out to make women feel. Just things to keep in mind. 

As for whether there's a way to do makeup without adhering to the patriarchy, I'm personally not convinced that there is. At the end of the day, the buyers are still mostly women and the sellers are still mostly men, and the industry itself is built on exploiting women. Makeup is also not good for you (eye makeup can be especially damaging bc you're putting stuff near your delicate eyes) so I would not encourage any woman to wear it, even in complete privacy. 

Regarding femme lesbians, I do want to note that lesbian femininity is quite different than heterosexual femininity, at least in my experience. For instance, it's pretty common for femmes not to shave, and most lesbians probably wouldn't think of not shaving as being inherently unwomanly (whereas men definitely do). I also don't think makeup is an essential part of being femme, nor are things like acrylic nails or long hair. I don't look at my wife and think of her as less feminine when she isn't wearing makeup, and she has plenty of feminine qualities that I desire by virtue of being female. Nothing man-made is required to make me attracted to her.

On the topic of attracting women, if your feminist values and beliefs are telling you that the beauty industry is wrong (which it is, you're 100% right), then it's up to you to live according to those values and beliefs. Some women do prefer when women wear makeup and shave, but knowing that the beauty industry is trash, it would probably be hard to be in a relationship with someone who adamantly expected you to do these things. Not performing certain beauty rituals is not going to be the thing that deprives you of love, and living authentically to you makes it more likely that you'll meet someone who is actually a good fit. 

[gingerontheside]

Ryokan: the Culture experience

As thrilled as I might have been to lounge around the Ryokan and Onsen the entirety of the long weekend, we decided it was for the best to actually go out and explore the area of Shimo-Suwa. It seemed the rural mountain town had a lot to offer in terms of cultural experiences, and who were we to deny ourselves of that?

Armed with a map sporting a "99 Minute Walking Tour of Shimo-Suwa," we ventured out of the Ryokan. I actually found the exact map we used, so feel free to check it out below:

We were on our way! Our first stop was to the side of the Raiko-Ji Buddhist temple, where we followed along the side of a large and beautiful cemetery until we happened upon what seemed to be a very old stone Torii gate. We bowed and entered, finding many shrines that were built in Japan's Edo period along the steep pathway and surrounded by a babbling stream. One of the most surprising shrines was a bright red Torii gate with a shrine that held many tiny statues of cats. This gate had clearly just been repainted, as it was very stark against the old stones that surrounded it.

It was not a great sign that all of us had already begun to feel the steep slopes in our leg muscles, yet we persevered and moved on to the next location. The Nasendo Highway is the path we had chosen to follow, which was high above the town below and provided beautiful views of the mountains and the whole valley. We passed by many beautiful traditional-style houses, and each seemed to have its own shrines set up meticulously in its backyard.

After a bit of walking, we made it to the gates of the Jiun-Ji Temple. It genuinely looked as though passing through the gate was entering another world, as everything was so dreary but through the gates the lush green moss was stark.

Inside, we walked carefully along the stone pathway to view the massive trees that lined the walkway. Inside, the Shrine was actively in use, as we could hear a priest chanting some kind of hymn from inside the main large shrine building. We had to strictly follow the pathway here, as all around us the loose pebbles were carefully arranged into a massive zen garden surrounding each building.

The path led us to a cemetery behind the shrine, where wooden buckets and ladles were located so that if/when a family or friend was visiting, they could cleanse the stones of their loved ones. Sound traveled quite well within the shrine, so we spoke in whispers and stepped very delicately, not wanting to disturb the priest. Down a steep stone staircase from the shrine was the Dragon's spout, where hot spring water always sprayed from a stone dragon's mouth that was carved in the middle Edo period. Though, honestly, it was more of a spittle than a spray of water.

Next, we made our way to the Harumiya Shrine. This shrine was very large and immaculately decorated, though honestly I was most compelled by the massive trees that stood around the shrine and were wrapped in some sort of special rope. I was told by Ash this was done by the priests to keep some form of spirit trapped within the trees they were wrapped on. By the entrance, two elderly attendants were stoking a fire. I'm not entirely sure why they did this, but it did add to the spiritual ambiance.

After exploring Harumiya for a while, we jaunted on over to the Ukashima-sha Shrine, which was very cool as it was located in the middle of a sandbar! Two bright red bridges metal connected the sandbar to the main mainland, which was really fun to run along.

There was construction happening along the waterway, which detracted a bit from the 'natural' beauty of the shine, but nonetheless, the shrine was very cool and it was funky to be surrounded by water on all sides. It gave the shrine a very 'disconnected from the physical world' vibe.

Next to the sandbar was a long walkway, which lead us right to the sight of the Manji Buddha statue. I was really looking forward to seeing this statue, as it was featured in nearly every aspect of the town. In paintings, in warnings, in advertisements, the Buddha was there to greet you. The story of the statue is that, in the Edo period, a sculptor was beginning to carve the stone, when it suddenly began bleeding and the people panicked. Convinced it was sacred, the stone was then carefully carved into the likeness of Amitabha Buddha, with a somewhat humorous appearance of a tiny head with a large nose upon a bulbous body. By the statue were instructions on how to properly pray, which we gave an honest shot. The instructions read; Bow once and say your prayer in your heart, then circle the statue 3 times while chanting the prayer in your heart, then bow once more.

This was the end of our cultural walk, as it then began to rain and it was very cold out so we did not want to linger. On our way back to the Ryokan, we passed by the Gebabashi Bridge, which was the oldest standing wooden structure in Shimo-Suwa. It was shaped like a half moon, aka it was VERY steep. It was cool to see where the bridge once stood, as it was now in the smack middle of a main road.

On our last day in Shimo-Suwa, we finally made our way to the Suwako Watch & Clock museum, a museum that sports the oldest Hydrolyc clock tower in Japan. Shimo-Suwa is known as the birthplace of the modern clock in Japan, so it was only natural that they had a whole museum dedicated to clocks. It was fun to walk around the main museum and see many different forms of clocks dating way back in the day to modern watches, and there were several interactive exhibits that explained how clocks worked, which was informative and fun. The main call of the museum, however, was the world's first fully operational water-powered astronomical clock tower that was in the courtyard.

This clock is over 900 years old (WOAH), and had been refurbished with (kind of creepy) statues to represent the workers that used to remain within the clock tower. We were actually allowed inside the tower, where two staircases lead you from the ground floor (where all of the old tech was), to the second floor, where an astronomical globe was carved with 1314 stars that were known at the time. (..I think. I honestly cannot find the paper that told me the star count)

Each hour, when the clock would chime, the main tower in the center (seen above) would spin with little statues, and little men would strike on drums or on bells. On the right-hand side, two doors would swing open and reveal a wax figure animatronic (again, kind of creepy) that would narrate...something. I don't know Japanese practically at all, so I did not catch what the animatronic was saying, but it was funky.

Our time in Shimo-Suwa had come to an end, and I have this to say: Nowhere in the US can you walk around a tiny town with this much history. Literally, since half of the shrines were made before the US was founded. Isn't that insane??

[writing-for-life]

@gargusscp It’s not you, (I think) it’s me 😂

I dared to write that (on a metaphorical/allegorical level = “in ways” that go beyond surface level), this is a happy ending of sorts (more about the term in a sec). I also stated that giving it a surface happy ending would, at least for me, detract from its deeper meaning. Two (or even more) things can be true at the same time, but that seems to be a wild thought?

There is much more nuance to that whole thread than in the OP sound bite. It’s a tale of both happy and sad endings, and I think everyone was/is pretty much aware of that. I don’t think anyone “pretended” it was “secretly” positive, because there are no secrets in a story that lives through the age-old dance of creation and perception (the writer creates, the reader perceives). You either find a positive message/meaning or you don’t (and finding that message, personal to us, is one of the purposes of a tragedy, not that the ending is depressing, and that’s all there is).

I totally understand how people can feel an aversion against the term “happy ending” in this context (as much as I have a personal aversion against giving The Sandman a different ending). Because of course it’s not a “happy ending” in the stereotypical sense (apparently that needs clarification). And yet, the message is inherently hopeful. Which gives a happy ending of sorts to what is otherwise sad (the story does not end with Murphy offing himself, but that just as an aside. It’s not only about him).

“Aspiring to be more than your career leads to catastrophic failure” is a reading that is only supported if we take the ending at face value (and also if we see Morpheus mostly as somewhat of a person rather than a concept). And I guess that reading is fair if people feel so inclined, but it’s not the only reading, and it’s certainly not what’s “really” been said (as in: it’s the only possible reading of The Sandman).

And I normally wouldn’t even write anything because I think everyone can find their own meaning, which will invariably be coloured by our life experiences. I mean—it’s a story about stories, that’s the whole fucking point: We find our own meaning in them.

The reason I *do* say something is that the notion The Sandman, again, “really” (= only possible reading) said “sometimes suicide IS the right answer” sits wrong with me. As someone who supports people with suicidal ideation on a near daily basis and has been touched by suicide more than once in her life, I don’t agree (people are obviously entitled to a more face value interpretation if they feel it’s closer to their personal truth). If it were only remotely bordering on glorifying suicide in any way, I would be fairly opposed to it. But it’s not in my view.

And what I’ll also say is that the tag “tragedies have depressing endings, that’s what they do” is a personal interpretation of what they do to the individual who reads them. It’s not the sole purpose of a tragedy to be depressing, quite the opposite. If we find them depressing and nothing else, that’s personal to us, and that’s okay, but it’s not an objective truth. Neither is finding them not depressing at all.

I guess all we can and should agree on is that the original purpose of a tragedy is to teach us (self-)compassion and lead us into catharsis, as in: making us feel, especially the painful stuff, and moving through those feelings—unclogging the drain, if you will. In fact, one of the main pillars of a tragedy is to create and provoke negative feelings in the audience on purpose so they can have that catharsis. If you don’t feel angry or sad at some point when you’re reading/watching a tragedy, it’s somewhat failed. Considering that I still cry buckets to this very day when I think about it too deeply, The Sandman definitively hasn’t failed in that regard, not for me. Doesn’t mean I can’t find the positive or hopeful message in it and think it’s a tale of both sad and happy endings. And no, tragedies aren’t for everyone, and I guess that’s okay.

And it’s also okay for people to see it differently without assuming that The Sandman “really said” anything.

The end of The Sandman books really said "sometimes suicide IS the right answer" and "aspiring to be more than your career leads to catastrophic failure" and yet people call it a happy and hopeful ending...

[synchronousemma]

21st October: N. takes M.

Read the post and comment on WordPress

Read: Vol. 3, ch. 19; p. 319 (“and Mr. Elton was called on” to “perfect happiness of the union”).

Context

Emma and Mr. Knightley marry. Mrs. Elton complains.

We know that this occurs “within a month” (p. 319) of Harriet and Robert Martin’s wedding in late September.

Readings and Interpretations

Very Little Lace

The description of Emma and Knightley’s wedding is dispatched rather tersely (it “was very much like other weddings, where the parties have no taste for finery or parade”), and it shares a sentence with almost the last thing we hear, the “discordant note” sounded by Mrs. Elton’s “irritating flummery” (Restuccia, p. 464).

Unsurprisingly, critics have widely divergent readings of the significance of this closing. A conventional reading holds that it does not detract from—that it even enhances—the prospect of our principles’ marital happiness. Bruce Stovel argues that, given that Mrs. Elton embodies “Emma’s worst qualities,” this final paragraph points to the expurgation of “the vain side of her own character”:

This passage tells us that Emma’s wedding ceremony is as un-Augustalike as possible: all the things that make the ceremony perfect, the absence of finery and parade and white satin, are seen by Mrs. Elton as deficiencies. The passage also tells us, slyly, in the words “from the particulars detailed by her husband,” that Mrs. Elton was not at the wedding; she has been excluded […]. (n.p.)

Similarly, L. J. Swingle argues that this juxtaposition encourages us to “experience this perfect union as some thing rising up against and triumphing over Mrs. Elton’s denigrating remarks”:

There is no universal agreement here, but rather a sort of warfare: on the one side, Mrs. Elton and her camp; on the other, the “small band of true friends,” whose predictions and hopes for the union are so perfectly answered. The pleasure this affords is that of observing conflict, and of seeing a desired element win out over an opposing force. […] [A]n essential part of our enjoyment in Jane Austen depends upon a principle of separation, the tension that exists between the Mrs. Eltons of society and the small band joined in celebration of union. Such satisfaction is grounded in a yearning for distinction, and thereby also exclusion. (p. 314)

For Joann Ryan Morse, however, it is Mrs. Elton’s inclusion in the broader community, even as she is excluded from the “small band of friends,” that is emphasized: “We make our life out of the circumstances life provides—[…] so we must meet and live with Mrs. Elton too, forever: with a hard-head [sic] as well as a genial spirit. Emma is a model of social inclusiveness and moral realism” (n.p.).

Other commenters take a dimmer view of Mrs. Elton’s intrusion. Roger Sales reads it in the context of the social and economic forces exerting change in Jane Austen’s time: he writes that the novel’s final marriages, with their promise of “bringing together Harriet of illegitimate birth, Robert Martin, tenant farmer, Knightley, landed-proprietor, and Emma of ancient stock,” provide “a mental prospect or idea of the nation only, without material evidence to substantiate it” (p. 104)). Against this background it is “significant, perhaps, that almost the last word in the novel is awarded to Mrs Elton as voice of the new force of individualistic competitive consumption […]” (ibid).

For Frances Restuccia, Mrs. Elton’s “fatuous comments” are a symptom of a “melancholia of the text” which, “rather than relinquishing signs, generates signs that are ‘absurd’ (Kristeva 1989, 47)” (p. 464). This melancholia is also evidenced by the “clichéd (dead)” nature of the “happily ever-after conclusion [‘the wishes, the hopes, the confidence, the predictions of the small band of true friends who witnessed the ceremony, were fully answered in the perfect happiness of the union’], a strangely vapid (and incongruously mixed) plenitude” (p. 464).

Perfect Happiness?

Restuccia is not alone in feeling that the ending of Emma is an unhappy one; critics prophesy doom from various quarters. G. B. Stern laments, on account of Mr. Woodhouse’s continued oppression of the young couple: “Oh, Miss Austen, it was not a good solution; it was a bad solution, an unhappy ending could we see beyond the last pages of the book” (p. 239). On this “solution” Bernard Paris writes: 

It is difficult to say whether Emma and Knightley have (theoretically) any acceptable alternative to living at Hartfield. As Jane Austen presents the situation, it is unthinkable either for Emma to leave her father or for Mr. Woodhouse to move to Donwell. Either course, we are made to feel, would result in his death. The only solution which the author can sanction is to have Emma and Knightley submit to Mr. Woodhouse’s claims, to sacrifice their autonomy, and to live a life of “continual endurance.” This may be, in fact, the only way of reconciling the demands of morality with the actualities of the situation; but, as some readers have felt, it is hardly a happy ending. Since the death of Mr. Woodhouse is the only possible source of relief, the reader is left wishing for it, and imagining the suppressed impatience of Emma and Knightley, at the end of the novel. Emma’s oversolicitude about her father may well be, in fact, a defense against unconscious desires for his disappearance. The only way she can remain free of guilt when he dies is to hover about him, protecting him from every disturbing influence. (pp. 94–5)

For other critics, the problem lies in the characters of Emma and Knightley themselves. Eugene Goodheart writes that, given that “the much older Knightley [has found] himself mostly in the role of admonisher of Emma’s behavior,” “it is hard to see how such a relationship can thrive in the long tenure of marriage except perhaps as entertainment in fiction—unless Emma outgrows that dear insubordinately willful part of her nature. Is that possible, and if possible is it desirable? Without certainty I am inclined to see Emma as irredeemable in her autonomy” (p. 604). Marvin Mudrick, less sympathetic to Emma, reads the narrator’s projection of “perfect happiness” as ironic in tone: “there is no happy ending, no easy equilibrium, if we care to project confirmed exploiters like Emma and Churchill into the future of their marriages” (p. 206).

William Deresiewicz argues that this irony is discoverable through close attention to the text itself: “we can hear the dark notes of the ending only if our ear has been properly tuned by the rest of the narrative” (p. 53).

[...] [A]ll three of those key words—“perfect,” “happiness,” and “union”—have been so ironized by the novel’s handling of them as to make it a matter of very grave doubt whether they are not rather to be avoided. The “union” of that last sentence echoes the language of the first, where “Emma Woodhouse, handsome, clever, and rich, with a comfortable home and a happy disposition, seemed to unite some of the best blessings of existence” [vol. 1, ch. 1; p. 1]. This first union, as we have seen, is in fact the start of all her woe […].

“Happiness” and its derivatives are words that—aside from also being compromised right from the beginning by that talk of Emma’s “happy disposition”—belong, above all, to Miss Bates and Mrs. Elton. […]

As for “perfect,” no word in the book is as insistently or emphatically undermined. Of the dozens of times it or its derivatives appear, almost none is without qualification or irony, the leading example being the conundrum devised by Mr. Weston, that moral imbecile, on the very heels of Emma’s cruelty to Miss Bates: “What two letters of the alphabet are there, that express perfection?” […] Wicked indeed is the game Austen plays with us throughout the novel, flattering us with our ability to see past Emma’s blindness about Elton only the better to rub our noses in our own blindness about Frank, conjuring seductive appearances that continually giving [sic] way to hidden, hinted-at realities of a less pleasant nature. The logic of the novel’s language makes its final statement into just such another happy deception, one that leaves us with a story in which nothing gets settled, an apparently “perfect” work that terminates in nothing but loose ends, a novel that refuses to stop playing games with us. (pp. 53–4)

Perfect Happiness!

For Wayne C. Booth, however, the discovery of irony in the final lines of Emma is part of a “reaction to an earlier generation that overdid the picture of ‘gentle Jane’”—but this “fashion[]” “underplay[s] the value of tenderness and good will in Jane Austen” (1961, p. 110 FN 11). He writes that “if we look at Emma and Knightley as real people, this ending will seem false” (ibid.); however, “the sense of ‘perfectedness’ or completion, the sense obviously intended by Jane Austen,” is embodied in the ending of the novel when it is considered as a created work (p. 111):1

[...] [I]t is precisely because this ending is neither life itself nor a simple bit of literary irony that it can serve so well to heighten our sense of a complete and indeed perfect resolution to all that has gone before. If we look at the values that have been realized in this marriage and compare them with those realized in conventional marriage plots, we see that Jane Austen means what she says: this will be a happy marriage because there is simply nothing left to make it anything less than perfectly happy. It fulfills every value embodied in the world of the book […] It is a union of intelligence: of “reason,” of “sense,” of “judgement.” It is a union of virtue: of “good will,” of generosity, of unselfishness. It is a union of feeling: of “taste,” “tenderness,” “love,” “beauty.”

[...] All of the cheap marriage plots in the world should not lead us to be embarrassed about our pleasure in Emma’s and Knightley’s marriage. It is more than just the marriage: it is the rightness of this marriage, as a conclusion to all of the comic wrongness that has gone before. The good for Emma includes both her necessary reform and the resulting marriage. Marriage to an intelligent, amiable, good, and attractive man is the best thing that can happen to this heroine, and the readers who do not experience it as such are, I am convinced, far from knowing what Jane Austen is about […]. (pp. 110–1)

Similarly, Malcolm Bradbury, writing in 1962, argues that

The ‘end’ of the book beautifully enforces the weight and meaning of the book; the waters clear, and all the significances are laid bare in a simple delaying action which enables Jane Austen to make clear all the inadequacies of her characters and the moral lesson to be learned from them. Repentance in Emma is delayed to the last and therefore most effective moment, and it comes after a train of thought in which we see Emma affected, involved, pressed into realisation of her follies. On top of understanding comes marriage, a right resolution to the plot in that it enforces the significance of true understanding. The preparation is over and by extending the novel indefinitely by a closing sentence referring to “the perfect happiness of the union” Jane Austen assures us that it is an effective understanding that Emma has come to. (p. 342)

Rachel Brownstein’s reading, like Booth’s, relies on the idea that the novel’s ending signposts its own contrived, comic nature:

[T]he last words of Emma emphasize the social spirit of comedy. The ending transforms Emma’s wedding into an abstraction—a union—among other abstractions like wishes, hopes, confidence, and happiness. Doing so, it puts Emma and her life at a distance. […]

Jane Austen charms us by permitting us to share with her this detached view of brides and grooms. Separated from Emma in the end, we no longer share her subjective reality, her anxiety to understand the world and herself; but we perceive her understanding with Mr. Knightley sympathetically, seeing it as a distant analogue of our understanding with the narrator. So we can enjoy feeling detached and connected at once. To be an amused spectator of marriages seems, in the end, quite as delightful and companionable as marrying is. The reader can eat her romantic cake and have it, too, and even hedge her bets on Emma’s happiness ever after. (p. 211)2

Where Do We Go from Here?

Amidst these contradictory readings, what do we all agree on, and what are we sure of? Little to nothing. Thorell Tsomondo writes that Emma “creates illusions, makes us aware that what may appear to be a statement of clarification may be but the reformulation of the problem. And nowhere is this phenomenon more palpably felt than in the novel’s ending” (p. 79):

The language of exclusion dominates the passage. The reader is shown what the wedding is not: no “finery”, no “parade”. We are told that the ceremony is witnessed by a “small band of true friends”; that Mrs Elton, not part of the “small band”, knows about the wedding only by report. Yet in naming Mrs Elton and emphasizing her absence, and in invoking her “never seen” Selina, the final paragraph of the novel brings Mrs Elton, her finery and parade into relief so sharply that she threatens to obscure the bride. Her voice echoes too in the very language that insists on her absence. In “the small band of true friends, fully, answered in… perfect happiness” (emphasis added), the sentiment may be the bride’s […], but the sense of overstatement, “true”, “fully”, “perfect”, is characteristically Mrs Elton’s. It encapsulates her vocabulary of superlatives and false aristocratic exclusiveness […]. The language of the final paragraph bears at once the pressures of absence and presence, of measure and excess.

[...] Further, in having “the wishes, the hopes, the confidence, the predictions of the small band of true friends. . . fully answered” in the wedding, the novel doubles back upon itself. Emma has been without wishes, hopes, confidence, predictions and weddings; all, up to this point, catalogue a series of false assumptions and lessons in reinterpretation. (p. 80)

Is the result of this ‘final’ reinterpretation, then, sure to be the ‘correct’ solution (morally or politically)? Have we arrived, through the novel’s final marriages, at a full (and therefore static) reckoning with reality—with morality, “intelligence,” “virtue,” sympathy, “feeling” (Booth, p. 110)? Have we arrived at a stable (and therefore, presumably, desirable) vision of political possibility—of “probability,” “eligibility” [E vol. 1, ch. 9; p. 48], and Burkean unity in stratification that foreclose upheaval? Many critics point out that “the novel’s conclusion arranges the characters in their proper social places” (Poovey, n.p.)—but what is the significance of this fact?

Cecily Devereux argues that, at the close of Emma,

Impropriety and secrecy are banished; everything is, as Emma puts it, “decided and open,” and is thus, paradoxically, closed. That is, in banishing secrecy and impropriety, Emma closes her own channels for expression: her conversion from Miss Woodhouse to Mrs. Knightley is conjoined with her conversion from “joking” at the beginning of the novel to “musing” at its end. Emma, in the end, subdues its own inherent impropriety and covert subversion. (p. 53)

Crucially, however, it does not do so in an unobtrusive, naturalized way: “Emma foregrounds the construction of a decorous order by interrupting the narrative and the social exchanges it portrays with ludic subversions which always draw attention to the fragility of the order they rupture” (p. 54). If Emma “submits in the end to the patriarchal order,” it is “not, however, without providing the reader with all the clues necessary to solve the mystery of the disappearing heroine that is the subtext and the critical game of Austen’s fiction” (ibid.).

Tsomondo identifies a similar closing-off of possibility at the novel’s end:

Through prior ordering and a number of displacements Austen’s plot, fraught at the outset with the tensions of inequality and possibility, resolves itself with predictable propriety into the neat Emma-Knightley, Fairfax-Churchill, Harriet-Martin linkages. Disparities still exist but now they are  contained, as tradition would have them, in parallel units.

The metaphor, marriage, and the rigid paradigmatic class system within which it functions, produces the sense of a violent freezing of the metonymic movement and textual interplay which up to now has lent to the narrative the dynamic instability and openness that characterized it. The nineteenth-century novelistic convention of happy marriages provides a convenient ending to the work, and the class dimension may say much about Austen’s own feeling concerning the ingredients for happy marriages […]. (p. 81)

However, as do many other Austen critics, he draws a distinction between the broad plot movements and surface significations of Austen’s marriage plots on the one hand, and the covert implications of her systems of irony and epistemological questioning on the other: he claims that “the text finally resists this formulaic closure. Emma remains a discourse about art as a system of constantly shifting signification, where meaning is always at the level of interpretation, resisting solidification into moral, social or political abridgement” (ibid).

For every critic who traces conservatism in the lines of Austen’s plots, there is another ready to discover irony in her textual surfaces, a wink and a nudge in the laconic sketchiness of her romantic conclusions—to claim that Austen is trying to “make a conventional form work, while making it work for matters unconventional” (Booth 1983, n.p.)—to identify a distinction between an “aesthetic resolution” and a “genuine social solution” (Poovey).3 Perhaps it is the nature of a novel that warns us of the perils of attempting to reduce signs to a predictable system to appear to be always one step ahead.

Footnotes

Harper notes “complete, full, finished, lacking in no way” as a definition of “perfect” from the late 14th century. See also Brownstein on how “Jane Austen assumes her reader understands this plot’s conventional nature” and will “take the long comic view of Emma Woodhouse”: “The heroine’s marriage—one of several, as usual in comedy—is presented as a conventional arrangement from the literary and the social points of view” (p. 211).

For other readings that confirm the happiness of Emma’s ending, at least insofar as Emma and Knightley’s marriage is concerned, see Duckworth (pp. 177–8); Trilling (pp. 58–9); Tave (pp. 254–5) (Duckworth admits “some ‘doubt in the case’” as to the marriage of Frank Churchill and Jane Fairfax).

Of course we must not assume that a depicted solution must be a recommended one; neither should we envision “conservatism” versus “radicalism” or “subversion” as wholly dichotomous; nor should we theorize a homogeneous ‘hegemony’—a ‘patriarchal’ order that encompasses domination along the lines of both sex and rank (or ‘gender’ and ‘class���)—as though it were not possible to resent male rule while upholding the natural rightness of aristocratic rule, or vise versa. A more granular picture of what, exactly, is being subverted or upheld in Austen is necessary in order to articulate her political views based on her work, if indeed such a thing is possible. On the interplay of “class” and “sex” in Emma see Johnson (p. 127).

Discussion Questions

Why are Mrs. Elton’s prosaic grumblings allowed to intrude on the final paragraph of the novel?

Does Emma have a “happy ending”? What is meant by this phrase—an ending that would be joyful if it occurred in reality? A good solution to a narrative problem (where we may understand “happy” as in “fitting, appropriate, convenient” as well as “content, joyful”)? An ending that makes a reader joyful? Should we read “perfect happiness” as something “flawlessly joyful” or something “completely appropriate”?

Is Emma ‘ultimately’ a conventional, didactic domestic comedy? Is it an artwork that argues, at the metatextual level, about the epistemological and signatory problems we encounter when interpreting art? Does it have anything to say about how we ‘should’ read and interpret signs in our everyday lives (making it, as a text, both didactic and focused on epistemic systems)? What assumptions do we make when we construct an argument about what this text (or any text) ‘is’?

Bibliography

Austen, Jane. Emma (Norton Critical Edition). 3rd ed. Ed. Stephen M. Parrish. New York: W. W. Norton & Company, [1815] 2000.

Booth, Wayne C. “Point of View and the Control of Distance in Emma.” Nineteenth-Century Fiction 16.2 (September 1961), pp. 95–116. Repr. in The Rhetoric of Fiction. 2nd Ed. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1983, pp. 243–66.

Bradbury, Malcolm. “Jane Austen’s Emma.” Critical Quarterly 4 (1962), pp. 335–46. DOI: 10.1111/j.1467-8705.1962.tb01434.x.

Brownstein, Rachel M. “Why We Reread Jane Austen.” In Why Jane Austen? New York: Columbia University Press (2011), pp. 195–236.

Deresiewicz, William. “Emma: Ambiguous Relationships.” In Jane Austen and the Romantic Poets. New York: Columbia University Press (2004), pp. 86–126.

Devereux, Cecily. “‘Much, Much beyond Impropriety’: Ludic Subversions and the Limitations of Decorum in Emma.” Modern Language Studies 25.4 (Autumn 1995), pp. 37–56. DOI: 10.2307/3195487.

Duckworth, Alistair M. “Emma and the Dangers of Individualism.” In The Improvement of the Estate: A Study of Jane Austen’s Novels. Baltimore, ML: John Hopkins Press, 1971, pp. 145–78.

Goodheart, Eugene. “Emma: Jane Austen’s Errant Heroine.” The Sewanee Review 116.4 (Fall 2008), pp. 589–604. DOI:10.1353/SEW.0.0087.

Harper, Douglas. “Etymology of perfect.” Online Etymology Dictionary. Accessed 20 October, 2022.

Johnson, Claudia L. “Emma: ‘Woman, Lovely Woman, Reigns Alone’.” In Jane Austen: Women, Politics, and the Novel. Chicago: University of Chicago Press (1988), pp. 121–43.

Kaye-Smith, Sheila, and G. B. Stern. Speaking of Jane Austen. New York: Harper & Brothers (1944).

Morse, Joann Ryan. “The Course of True Love Never Did Run Smooth: Shakespearean Comedy in Emma.” Persuasions On-Line 26.1 (Winter 2005).

Mudrick, Marvin. Jane Austen: Irony as Defense and Discovery. Princeton: Princeton University Press (1952).

Paris, Bernard. “Emma.” In Character and Conflict in Jane Austen’s Novels: A Psychological Approach. Detroit: Wayne State University Press (1978), pp. 64–95.

Poovey, Mary. “The True English Style.” Persuasions 5 (1983), pp. 10–12.

Restuccia, Frances L. “A Black Morning: Kristevan Melancholia in Jane Austen’s Emma.” American Imago 51.4 (Winter 1994), pp. 447–69.

Sales, Roger. Jane Austen and Representations of Regency England. Routledge: London (1996).

Stovel, Bruce. “Comic Symmetry in Jane Austen’s Emma.” Dalhousie Review 57.3 (1977), pp. 453–65.

Swingle, L. J. “The Perfect Happiness of the Union: Jane Austen’s Emma and English Romanticism.” The Wordsworth Circle 7.4 (Autumn 1976), pp. 312–19.

Tave, Stuart. “The Imagination of Emma Woodhouse.” In Some Words of Jane Austen. Chicago: University of Chicago Press (1973), pp. 205–55.

Trilling, Lionel. “Emma.” Encounter 8.6 (June 1957), pp. 49–59.

Tsomondo, Thorell. “Emma: A Study in Textual Strategies.” English Studies in Africa 30.2 (1987), pp. 69–82. DOI: 10.1080/00138398708690840.

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

So I looked through a detransition blog just out of curiosity, since it was one you reblogged, but now I’m super... freaked out? I have a top surgery consultation in April but now I have this weird fear that I’m faking it or that I’ll regret it afterwards. I’ve identified as somewhere along non-binary and trans (he/they!) for over a year, and I’ve known I’m not a girl for even longer, but now I’m just so afraid that maybe I don’t know myself at all. Do you have any advice on what this is?

Lee says:

Discussing your feelings with a therapist can sometimes help you untangle the anxiety from everything else. It’s reasonable to have some apprehension about a major surgery that can have a big impact on your life because it is a big change- and like any other surgery, it also has medical risk and can result in complications. 

And reading about other people’s feelings about their surgeries can be helpful! I do recommend reading things from people who were happy with the outcome and reading things from people who weren't to get a better perspective on the range of experiences that can exist. Only reading the negative or the positive doesn’t provide a balanced view!

But even if you read other people’s stories, and talk to them about why they feel the way they do about their choices and bodies, nobody else can tell you what you should do for yourself. Even a therapist can’t know for sure if you will regret surgery (or anything else that you choose to do) because nobody can see into the future, see into your heart, and see into mind simultaneously to and determine for certain what it is that you need. 

As soon as I came out as non-binary when I was 15, I started saving money for top surgery. I was someone who ran towards top surgery at full tilt and I didn’t give myself any space for doubt about whether it was the right choice for me because I felt it was the only choice I had-- forwards or nothing. I was pretty severely depressed at the time and had a brief hospitalization the month before I turned 18, and I was sort of pinning all my hopes on top surgery reducing my dysphoria and booting out my depression. So I scheduled my consultation as soon as I turned 18 and was legally an adult and could do so without parental permission. I immediately scheduled my surgery for the soonest available date, and had inverted-T incision top surgery about 3 months after I turned 18.

Now I’m 21 years old, and I’m 3 years and 5 months post-op from my top surgery. 

In retrospect, top surgery was 110% the right choice for me. If I could do it all over again, I’d do it in a heartbeat. Top surgery really did reduce my dysphoria by a significant amount, and that made it easier for me to cope with my depression and other mental health issues. I was proudly parading around the house shirtless as soon as I was able to stop using post-op compression, before my incisions had even healed into scars.

I don’t have any dysphoria about my chest anymore, especially now that I’ve gotten tattoos to cover my scars. I finally feel like I look like how I always knew I was meant to look.

I don’t post pictures of my chest anymore because I have distinguishing tattoos but I’ve posted a few before/after pictures when I was 3 years post-op and I think things have only gotten better now.

I was lucky to not have any complications; I don’t have any nerve pain, and hypertrophic or keloid scarring, and I didn’t need any revisions. But there are some things that are non-ideal compared to if I had just been born with a typical cis-guy flat chest. My nips are a little wonky in color and shape, and I plan on getting medical tattoos at some point to even the edges out. I also have slightly muted sensation in my chest now, so everything is like slightly number than it was before.

When I was pre-op, I did enjoy having nipple sensation that was pleasurable; even though I had inverted t-incision top surgery which preserved the nipple stalk, I still only have tactile, temperature, and pain sensations in my chest. If you put an ice cube on my nipple and my eyes were closed, I’d know it was cold. If you poked me while I was looking away, I’d still feel it. And if you squeezed me, it would hurt. But somehow it doesn’t feel good anymore like it used to. 

I don’t know how much of that loss in erotic sensation is a mental thing and how much is a physical change caused by scar tissue build up around the nerve. But regardless, it is a real loss. 

For me, that loss is well worth it. While I might have been physically capable of experiencing erotic nipple/chest sensation before, I rarely actually did have that experience because it made me too dysphoric and I didn’t like to take my shirt off during sex. Now I feel more fully present and comfortable in my own body and it makes me more engaged so I can focus on my partner and on the other feelings I’m having and how I look isn’t something that is detracting from the experience. 

In general, top surgery has made my life better in a million ways. I love running shirtless with my college cross country team, I like going swimming at the beach with no shirt, and I like the way I look now when I see myself in a mirror after stepping out of the shower. 

When I get dressed in the morning, my day starts off on a neutral note because it’s just me putting on clothes. Sometimes I pause to think about how I can just put on a shirt and feel good about it and move on. Before, I used to be upset every morning because the first thing I’d be reminded of when I woke up was that my chest was there and I didn’t want it to be. I’m Autistic, and binding was Not comfortable for me sensory-wise, so not having to bind was also nice.

I would choose to get top surgery again, but that doesn’t mean that it’s the right choice for each and every person. I am sure it was the right choice for me, and I have no regrets at all, I never want to have breasts again. But someone else might think that not having erotic nipple sensation is a dealbreaker, or they might not be comfortable with scars if they tend to heal with more visible raised scars that are harder to cover with a tattoo like I did mine.

So I can tell you that top surgery has made my life better and I’m glad I got it and I don’t think that there would have been any way for me to be as happy as I am now if I had not gotten it. Top surgery is life saving and life-changing for some people, and I am one of those people. I might be more inclined to tell people that if you think you need surgery you should get it because my surgery went so well and because I’m still identifying as genderqueer, transmasculine, and non-binary, just like I was when I was 15, so my identity is pretty static there.

Some other post-op people may tell you that they regret their surgery, that they wish they hadn’t done it, and they would make a different decision if they could go back in time. They might want to help warn other people to not make the same mistake that they did.  Detransitioned folks often (but not always) have a different perspective than folks who persisted in being transgender and that’s okay- it isn’t a better perspective or a worse one, just a different one. But both trans and reidentified people can feel this way, even though it’s usually more common for de-trans folks to regret surgical procedures that it is for trans folks.

I semi-rushed into surgery for both emotional and logistical reasons but I knew it was right for me. But that isn’t the best choice for everyone and if you aren’t 100% sure that it is what you want and need then there’s nothing wrong with having the consultation with the surgeon to learn more and then thinking things over before you schedule a surgery date (or don’t), you don’t need to immediately schedule a surgery date after the consult. Think of it as an interview and as an information gathering session.

Neither of us can tell you what you should do because neither of us are “right” or “wrong” about top surgery. It’s just a different experience and a different perspective. We all have biases based on our own way of seeing things, and that can inform our advice.

If you know what the risks are, and you’ve given it careful thought and can provide an informed consent, then whether you should get surgery is your decision. I won’t tell you “go get it!” or “don’t go get it!” and I don’t think that any blogger should be telling anons what medical procedures to get or not get. 

Worrying that you’re faking it, that you don’t know who you are, and worrying about regret is something that can be pretty scary and frustrating, but you don’t need to figure it out on your own, and it’s okay to take a little longer to come to a decision and talk it over with a therapist if you think it’s necessary to help you cope with that anxiety.

But yeah, I believe that ultimately you have to trust your gut feelings on what you know to be right for you.

Top surgery 101 links

Finding a therapist

Side note: While we do our best to avoid reblogs from obvious TERFs/truscum/transphobes/racists/sexists/ableists/etc to avoid exposing people to triggering content by boosting the blog’s visibility, and we do appreciate getting heads up asks about reblogs from a problematic OP, if we reblog a post from someone we do not necessarily endorse all of the content in every post they’ve made, and we don’t necessarily agree with all of the blogger’s opinions either. We reblog a specific post if we think seeing that post might be helpful for some of our followers.

[mysticjupi]

Umineko: When They Cry Review - Episode 0

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

Part 0: Notes

This post can't be as aesthetic as I would like due to only having a phone; however I'll make do with what I have. Hello! Thank you for taking the time to read this; assuming you read my info on the header of my blog page, you should also know my dream is to be an author...and that takes me here, to Umineko and the WTC series in general. I finished reading the Umineko Visual Novel, and have watched the Higurashi Anime, and I plan to read the Manga for Higurashi soon.

The following posts will be about my thoughts, experience, and love for WTC, however this post 0 will be about WTC in general, along with miscallenous things.

Needless to say, SPOILERS!!!

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

Part 1: When They Cry

My first experience with the series was years ago, when I was a child; and coming across some of the more gorey scenes from Higurashi on youtube, I was curious yet I never persued more of this media. Years went by and it remained nothing more than a afterthought in the back of my head, however, a friendgroup who was big into Higurashi made me watch the anime, and I decided on my own to read the Umineko novel, and since then...I've been very into the fandom for a few months.

I took two months to finish the Umineko VN...

And as you can tell, some days I read very generously. That being said however, it was all time well spent.

Ryukishi's writing has become an inspiration and something I think about greatly, his ability for creating and characterizing his characters in both dynamic and subtle ways has stuck out to me, as well as how he handles abuse and sensitive topics authors usually avoid delving into. This aspect will be discussed more when I get around to talking about characters.

However, the thing that sticks out the most to me is his...lessons. How he makes you think about mortality and the negative and positive aspects of people and their situations. Higurashi and Umineko identify and share their themes strongly, while leaving some leeway for the reader to think about it themselves. God knows I've been rethinking and pondering a lot of Umineko's plot.

Without Love, it cannot be seen. Is a new philosophy I have started to use, for example.

That's where much of my love for WTC comes from, and before you ask, I know nothing about Ciconia but I plan to read it once my technology situation is sorted.

I think that's enough for my introduction, and now you know where I stand on this series that's wiggled it's way into my heart.

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

Part 2: Music

Before I discuss the Episodes of Umineko, I'd like to dedicate some to discuss one of my other favorite aspects of the Visual Novel, which is of course the amazing soundtrack that I cannot get enough of.

I never knew a Visual Novel about victorian ladies fucking with people would carry such a banger OST. I'll link some of my favorites:

Patchwork Chimera

Death From Stupefaction

Golden Sneer

Haze

Dream End Discharger

Deep Blue Jeer

The Girls Witch Hunt

Kina no Kaori

Reflection Call

Last End Conducter

I never realized how big of an impact music had on your enjoyment of a story, but Umi's soundtrack compliments scenes extremely well. There isn't much to say here but it's an extremely good listen and one of the major perks of the visual novel. Kudos to the various composers who worked on the soundtrack.

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

Part 3: Artstyle and Design

The last thing I should have to say for this post, and of course this section will be talking about the original novel Artstyle, however the others will be mentioned.

Umineko's designs are stand-out and very unique yet remain alluring. This goes both for the hair and face of the characters and their outfits...

And of course, the fact many of the outfits are taken from actual goth fashion being displayed at around the time or Umineko's original releases. Some of my favorite examples:

Wonderful, I think. I can easily tell these characters from their silhouettes which always means good design. Somewhat unrelated but Ryukishi seemed to really enjoy thigh gaps when designing, (Chiester Sisters, Dlanor's Group, Seven Stakes...) and whatever you would consider Gaap's Gap. However this isn't a negative by any means. Most of the men's outfits are suits, however I can appreciate a formal and crisp style and at least everyone has their own suit aesthetic. Original Battler is the best style btw.

To make mention of the other Artstyles Umineko has...

Pachinko: It's...good? Some characters look better like Lambadelta or George but some were...proportioned oddly? Kyrie and her immensely inflated chest definitely put me off. I had the Pachinko sprites option during my read so I swapped between this and original depending on who was onscreen.

PS3 Remake: Very good and faithful rendition while also modernizing and streamlining designs, though it didn't quite capture the rawness of Ryukishi's expressions in the original Artstyle at times.

Manga: Amazing. The Umineko manga expressions are absolutely amazing. Raw, detailed, the anount of time spent on those illustrations is obvious, up there with the original style.

Anime: It's alright.

That said, the expressions of Umi are stunning, which makes sense considering how gritty and fucked up the story can be at times, nothing beats the little laugh that accompanies these expressions in the visual novel.

(Original Novel) Finally, while the backgrounds in the novel can be pretty simple, Ryukishi truly does his best with what he has and works with, and I think the simple backgrounds work well to not detract focus from the characters and text, however I wish he made the glass shatter screen transition a bit less abrupt?

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

That covers everything I feel like I should discuss, next I'll be taking a retrospective look at Episode 1 of Umineko...Legend of the Golden Witch.

I think one or two posts a day covering a episode will be how I'll write the rest of this review, I hope you enjoy!

- Jupiter.

As some last notes, feel free to interact with me in dms or asks or anything! I'd love to discuss this story with anyone because hearing differing opinions or just bonding over media is one of my favorite things! I'd love to make friends

This of course is all opinion and not objective! I love seeing different views and all opinions are valid to me!

Have a nice day!

[spaceorphan18]

do u think Kurt has ever had sex w anyone aside from Blaine? I sort of like the idea that he really took his dad’s word to heart and only attached sex to feelings, which is why it was so important to him in their relationship. Personally I don’t believe he had sex with Walter or Adam because of the body language he had around them. I don’t want it to be like “Kurt is a virgin saving himself for Blaine” but more like Blaine is the only one he’s ever felt deeply enough to have sex. thoughts?

I understand the sentiment of your feelings -- I do, because I was once there during the original run of the show.  And there’s nothing proving things one way or an other -- so, even after you’ve read what I have to say, if you feel differently, that’s perfectly fine and valid!  The text is pretty open to any kind of interpretation. 

Before I get into it, I want to discuss your comment: 

I don’t want it to be like “Kurt is a virgin saving himself for Blaine” but more like Blaine is the only one he’s ever felt deeply enough to have sex.

So, I want to start by saying when I was younger, I didn’t understand how people could just have sex with people they weren’t in love with.  Part of it is because my Mom was a lot like Burt, and gave me a talk very similarly to what Kurt receives in the show.  Part of it is, I’ve learned, is because I’m demisexual, and I’ve never felt the need to have casual sex.  But as I’ve gotten older, my views on this have changed a lot.  

I do believe that Blaine is the only one whom Kurt has had deep and meaningful sex, but Kurt having other sexual relationships and encounters is not at all a bad thing -- and can be quite healthy in his understanding of how relationships, and his own sexuality, work.  Now, I’d like to make clear that it’s fine whether you’ve had sex with a hundred people, or if you’ve had sex with no one -- your worth is not valued by the amount (or lack) of sexual partners you’ve had.   But what I am saying is that there’s nothing wrong with Kurt having other sexual partners, nor does it detract from the meaningfulness that finds in having sex with Blaine.  

So, let’s talk a second about Previously Unaired Christmas (yes, I know, I’d rather not, either, but it does have some valuable insight).  Kurt, in an attempt to feel better, makes the decision to get a little tipsy, and throw caution to the wind -- and in the process decides to hook up with Cody.  Now, pretending that he isn’t a skeevy conman who preys on minors, Kurt would have surely slept with Cody. And found... that casual sex can still feel good, but maybe it’s not for him because he does prefer the emotional connection his bond with Blaine brings.  

I don’t think the encounter with Cody needed to be a bad one. (My huge objection to this whole thing in the episode is that Cody is a really gross guy taking advantage of minors, and for that I’m glad he didn’t get that far with Kurt.)  I think as long as you have a healthy attitude towards sex and the idea of sex, that you can enjoy the pleasure of it even if it isn’t as emotionally satisfying as having sex with someone you love deeply.  And that’s okay!  Say this did happen with Kurt -- it doesn’t undermine the fact that Kurt is very much still in love with Blaine.  

FWIW - I did write a casual sexual relationship for Kurt in my fic With Every Broken Bone (set between seasons 5 and 6) for this reason -- so Kurt can have a positive sexual encounter who isn’t Blaine - where he comes out of it happy to have had the experience, but still very much in love with Blaine.  

Moving on... let’s talk about Adam! I’ve done a lot of talk about Adam, tbh, (you can find it in my meta tag!) so I’ll probably keep this short.  I think if Kurt was to sleep with Adam, it’d be after Boys and Girls on Film, after they go on that date.  I don’t think Kurt was there yet before, but there’s a definite possibility that after they see their movie, things progress.  But, as with the Cody example, I can easily see Kurt sleeping with Adam, and it not being bad, but not being great either, so he decides he’d rather sleep with his boyfriend pillow, Bruce instead of Adam (which, let’s be honest, is kinda funny).  

I do like the idea of Kurt sleeping with Adam -- because it gives him more experience, but also because it gives him another change to realize how valuable his relationship with Blaine is -- because it allows him to have something to compare to.  

Let’s talk about Walter... Now, I think the show goes out of its way to paint them as nonsexual -- mostly because that relationship keeps getting compared to Blaine’s very sexual relationship with Karofsky as a really chaste thing.  

But I’ve warmed considerably to the idea that Kurt slept with Walter.  So, here’s my thing -- at this point in his life, Kurt has a very different relationship with sex than when he did a few years earlier.  He and Blaine have now had a ton of sex.  Kurt knows what he likes and what he doesn’t, and we know that he really enjoys sex (and is very grupmy when he doesn’t get it).  I can see Kurt going into the thing with Walter being well aware that he just wants to have sex with an attractive older man and it doesn’t mean much other than feeling good.  

And that’s okay! Because Kurt knows he can easily walk away from it once Blaine becomes available again.  As Brittany has told him -- he shouldn’t just put his life on hold just because he’s waiting for he and Blaine to get back together, and part of his life is sex.  So, yeah, I can see him enjoying a casual, sexual relationship with Walter while waiting to get back with Blaine.  

So, those are my thoughts! My line of thinking, and maybe it’s just age that’s gotten me here, is that there’s no shame whatever your sexual history might be.  I do agree with Burt’s sentiment that you shouldn’t throw yourself around as a way to please other people, because it’s expected of you, or because you feel that’s the only way to receive love (Blaine tried that -- it didn’t work).  But having a healthy relationship with sex and your own sexual identity is a good thing! 

Whether you’re like Mercedes and want to only have sex with someone you’re going to marry, or whether you’re like Brittany and have fun having sex with everyone -- as long as you’re being safe, educated, and in a consenting situation, then what ever your sexual encounters are is fine!  I personally like the idea of Kurt exploring his sexual identity with other people because it helps inform his decision that Blaine is ultimately the person he wants to be with.  But the text is open, and if you interpret it differently, that’s cool, too.  :) 

[davidmann95]

Superman’s 10 Best of the ‘10s

Good Miracle Monday, folks! The first third Monday of May of a new decade for that matter, and while that means that today in the DC Universe Superman just revealed his secret identity to the world on the latest anniversary of that time he defeated the devil, in ours it puts a capstone on a solid 10 years of his adventures now in the rear view mirror, ripe for reevaluation. And given there’s a nice solid ‘10′ right there I’ll go ahead with the obvious and list my own top ten for Superman comics of the past decade, with links in the titles to those I’ve spoken on in depth before - maybe you’ll find something you overlooked, or at least be reminded of good times.

A plethora of honorable mentions: I’m disqualifying team-ups or analogue character stories, but no list of the great Superman material of the last decade would be complete without bringing up Cave Carson Has A Cybernetic Eye #7, Avengers 34.1, Irredeemable, Sideways Annual #1, Supreme: Blue Rose, Justice League: Sixth Dimension, usage of him in Wonder Twins, (somewhat in spite of itself) Superior, from all I’ve heard New Super-Man, DCeased #5, and Batman: Super Friends. And while they couldn’t quite squeeze in, all due praise to the largely entertaining Superman: Unchained, the decades’ great Luthor epic in Superman: The Black Ring, a brilliant accompaniment to Scott Snyder’s work with Lex in Lex Luthor: Year of the Villain, the bonkers joy of the Superman/Luthor feature in Walmart’s Crisis On Infinite Earths tie-in comics, Geoff Johns and John Romita’s last-minute win in their Superman run with their final story 24 Hours, Tom Taylor’s quiet criticism of the very premise he was working with on Injustice and bitter reflection on the changing tides for the character in The Man of Yesterday, the decades’ most consistent Superman ongoing in Bryan Miller and company’s Smallville Season 11, and Superman: American Alien, which probably would have made the top ten but has been dropped like a hot potato by one and all for Reasons. In addition are several stories from Adventures of Superman, a book with enough winners to merit a class of its own: Rob Williams and Chris Weston’s thoughtful Savior, Kyle Killen and Pia Guerra’s haunting The Way These Things Begin, Marc Guggenheim and Joe Bennett’s heart-wrenching Tears For Krypton, Christos Gage and Eduardo Francisco’s melancholy Flowers For Bizarro, Josh Elder and Victor Ibanez’s deeply sappy but deeply effective Dear Superman, Ron Marz and Doc Shaner’s crowdpleasing Only Child, and Kelly Sue DeConnick and Valentine DeLandro’s super-sweet Mystery Box.

10. Greg Pak/Aaron Kuder’s Action Comics

Oh, what might’ve been. In spite of an all-timer creative team I can’t justify listing this run any higher given how profoundly and comprehensively compromised it is, from the status quo it was working with to the litany of ill-conceived crossovers to regular filler artists to its ignominious non-ending. But with the most visceral, dynamic, and truly humane take on Clark Kent perhaps of all time that still lives up to all Superman entails, and an indisputably iconic instant-classic moment to its name, I can’t justify excluding it either.

9. Action Comics #1000

Arguably the climax to the decade for the character as his original title became the first superhero comic to reach a 1000th issue. While any anthology of this sort is a crapshoot by nature, everyone involved here seemed to understand the enormity of the occasion and stepped up as best they could; while the lack of a Lois Lane story is indefensible, some are inevitably bland, and one or two are more than a bit bizarre, by and large this was a thoroughly charming tribute to the character and his history with a handful of legitimate all-timer short stories.

8. Faster Than A Bullet

Much as Adventures of Superman was rightfully considered an oasis amidst the New 52′s worst excesses post-Morrison and in part pre-Pak, few stories from it seem well-remembered now, and even at the time this third issue inexplicably seemed to draw little attention. Regardless, Matt Kindt and Stephen Segovia’s depiction of an hour in the life of Superman as he saves four planets first thing in the morning without anyone noticing - while clumsy in its efforts at paralleling the main events with a literal subplot of a conversation between Lois and Lex - is one of the best takes I can recall on the scope on which he operates, and ultimately the purpose of Clark Kent.

7. Man and Superman

Seemingly geared on every front against me, built as it was on several ideas of how to handle Superman’s origin I legitimately hate, and by a writer whose work over the years has rarely been to my liking, Marv Wolfman and Claudio Castellini’s Man and Superman somehow came out of nowhere to be one of my favorite takes on Clark Kent’s early days. With a Metropolis and characters within it that feel not only alive but lived-in, it’s shocking that a story written and drawn over ten years before it was actually published prefigured so many future approaches to its subject, and felt so of-the-moment in its depiction of a 20-something scrambling to figure out how to squeeze into his niche in the world when it actually reached stores.

6. Brian Bendis’s run

Controversial in the extreme, and indeed heir to several of Brian Bendis’s longstanding weaknesses as a writer, his work on The Man of Steel, Superman, and Action Comics has nevertheless been defined at least as much by its ambition and intuitive grasp of its lead, as well as fistfuls of some of the best artistic accompaniment in the industry. At turns bombastic space action, disaster flick, spy-fi, oddball crime serial, and family drama, its assorted diversions and legitimate attempts at shaking up the formula - or driving it into new territory altogether, as in the latest, apparently more longterm-minded unmasking of Clark Kent in Truth - have remained anchored and made palatable by an understanding of Superman’s voice, insecurities, and convictions that go virtually unmatched.

5. Strange Visitor

The boldest, most out-of-left-field Superman comic of the past 10 years, Joe Keatinge took the logline of Adventures of Superman to do whatever creators wanted with the character and, rather than getting back to a classic take absent from the mainline titles at the time as most others did, used the opportunity for a wildly expansive exploration of the hero from his second year in action to his far-distant final adventure. Alongside a murderer’s row of artists, Keatinge pulled off one of the few comics purely about how great Superman is that rather than falling prey to hollow self-indulgence actually managed to capture the wonder of its subject.

4. Superman: Up In The Sky

And here’s the other big “Superman’s just the best” comic the decade had to offer that actually pulled it off. Sadly if reasonably best-known for its one true misfire of a chapter, with the increasing antipathy towards Tom King among fans in general likely not helping, what ended up overlooked is that this is a stone-cold classic on moment of arrival. Andy Kubert turns in work that stands alongside the best of his career, Tom King’s style is honed to its cleanest edge by the 12-pager format and subject matter, and the quest they set their lead out on ends up a perfect vehicle to explore Superman’s drive to save others from a multitude of angles. I don’t know what its reputation will end up being in the long-term - I was struck how prosaic and subdued the back cover description was when I got this in hardcover, without any of the fanfare or critic quotes you’d expect from the writer of Mister Miracle and Vision tackling Superman - but while its one big problem prevents me from ranking it higher, this is going to remain an all-timer for me.

3. Jeff Loveness’s stories Help and Glasses

Cheating shamelessly here, but Jeff Loveness’s Help with David Williams and Glasses with Tom Grummett are absolutely two halves of the same coin, a pair of theses on Superman’s enduring relevance as a figure of hope and the core of Lois and Clark’s relationship that end up covering both sides of Superman the icon and Superman the guy. While basically illustrated essays, any sense of detached lecturing is utterly forbidden by the raw emotion on display here that instantly made them some of the most acclaimed Superman stories of the last several years; they’re basically guaranteed to remain in ‘best-of’ collections from now until the end of time.

2. Superman Smashes The Klan

A bitter race for the top spot, but #2 is no shame here; while not quite my favorite Superman story of the past ten years, it’s probably the most perfectly executed. While I don’t think anyone could have quite expected just *how* relevant this would be at the top of the decade, Gene Yang and Gurihiru put together an adventure in the best tradition of the Fleischer shorts and the occasional bystander-centered episodes of Batman: The Animated Series to explore racism’s both overt and subtle infections of society’s norms and institutions, the immigrant experience, and both of its leads’ senses of alienation and justice. Exciting, stirring, and insightful, it’s debuted to largely universal acknowledgement as being the best Superman story in years, and hopefully it’ll be continued to be marketed as such long-term.

1. Grant Morrison’s Action Comics

When it came time to make the hard choice, it came in no small part down to that I don’t think we would have ever seen a major Golden Age Superman revival project like Smashes The Klan in the first place if not for this. Even hampering by that godawful Jim Lee armor, inconsistent (if still generally very good) art, and a fandom that largely misunderstood it on arrival can’t detract from that this is Grant Morrison’s run on a Superman ongoing, a journey through Superman’s development as a character reframed as a coherent arc that takes him from Metropolis’s most beaten-down neighborhoods to the edge of the fifth dimension and the monstrous outermost limits of ‘Superman’ as a concept. It launched discussions of Superman as a corporate icon and his place relative to authority structures that have never entirely vanished, introduced multiple all-time great new villains, and made ‘t-shirt Superman’ a distinct era and mode of operation for the character that I’m skeptical will ever entirely go away. No other work on the character this decade had the bombast, scope, complexity, or ambition of this run, with few able to match its charm or heart. And once again, it was, cannot stress this enough, Grant Morrison on an ongoing Superman book.

[love-killed-the-superstar]

yay its day 2!! uhh this one’s very dialogue heavy lol

CASSUNZEL WEEK DAY 2 - SECRETS AND PROMISES

“Hey... Cass?”

“Mhm?”

“The Day of Hearts is coming up. Think you’ll stick around for it this time?”

“Eugh. You know there’s a reason I don’t like to come back this time of year, right?”

Cassandra rolls her eyes so spectacularly far back Rapunzel can’t help but laugh despite the gesture being directed at her.

“Well, since you returned I’ve been thinking about the first Day of Hearts we spent together.”

“Oh, geez, this again? Can’t we just put that whole incident in the past?” Cass grumbles.

She’s posing – stiffly as a whistle, mind – for one of Rapunzel’s signature portraits. Rapunzel knows that Cass gets restless whenever she paints her, but the request is a way she can keep her in one place for a while. (That, and Cass is one of her favourite muses; something about the sharpness of her eyes draws her in, and the delight she takes in trying to paint hints of her toned muscles under her formless clothing is unparalleled.)

Cassandra hasn’t been back for… over six months now. She’s missed her.

“You just seemed so… annoyed about the whole affair, even before that guy Andrew arrived in Corona,” Rapunzel continues, mixing up a creamy paint for the base of Cassandra’s skin. “Was it really because you were only pretending to date him?”

“No, no, it had nothing to do with him at the core of it, I just… don’t care for romance and hearts, and Shorty dressing as whatever the hell kind of messed up cherub he’s going for.”

“Sure, the sight isn’t for everybody,” Rapunzel laughs. “You still believe you don’t care for romance and hearts though, after all this time?”

“You’re an exception to the rule, all right? Besides, Corona has way too many public holidays for my liking.”

“All right, noted. I’ve just always wondered if there was something more to it. I know we don’t share everything, and I know you have boundaries. If you really don’t want to talk about it, I’ll drop the subject. Princess’s Honour.”

She holds up her hand in a scout-like salute, almost dropping her paintbrush in the process, and Cass laughs.

“As a rogue traveller, Princess’s Honour only goes so far these days.”

“Well, what about Girlfriend’s Honour?”

“Now that, I can work with.” Cass hums in thought. “To tell you the truth, Raps, I just don’t have a great experience with romance. Besides you, of course.”

“I have no experience with romance besides you and Eugene,” Rapunzel remarks. “Does that make us about even?”

Cass grins, shaking her head in exasperation. “Uh, maybe, I guess. Besides, even if I was looking for love – which I’m not, just to clarify – it’s not so straightforward as that.”

“What?! Why? I know you, er, don’t warm up to people so easily, but you’re smart and funny and strong, and you’re beautiful! Any man would-”

“Well that’s one of the bigger hurdles, to start with,” Cass interrupts. Her mouth pulls into a line as she contemplates her next words, her eyes darting between Rapunzel and the door as if calculating her odds of being able to make a hasty exit if things get too personal for her liking. “I don’t date men, Rapunzel. At all. I thought that would be obvious, since I’m in love with you, but...”

Rapunzel stares, brush suspended midway to the canvas as she processes that last statement.

“What, at all? But, I thought – even if you were pretending with Andrew, you still…”

“Seriously?! After all that happened you thought I would actually be attracted to that whiny, pig-headed-”

“Ah-ah-ah!” Rapunzel holds out her hand, and Cass stops her arm-waving tirade to glare at Rapunzel. “Please, Cass, I’m still painting you.”

Cass pulls a face and reluctantly moves back into her original pose, before starting again. “Rapunzel, did you listen to that ridiculous story about the sheepskin jacket? I had to hear it three times. And the preaching on and on about being a bibliophile, while I had to sit there knowing perfectly well he couldn’t even spell the word… Any shred of curiosity I might have had for how the other half lives – it left long before that last retelling, believe me.”

“He had a nice face,” Rapunzel offers.

“A nice face is just a nice face, it doesn’t mean anything. Don’t forget he’s tried to invade Corona twice already.”

“Hmm. Good point. Well, you have me now, so we can forget about that guy.”

“I honestly haven’t given that clown a passing thought in years.” She stands patiently as Rapunzel holds up a tube of paint against her tunic to judge how much warm blue to mix with the yellow in her palette. “Besides, you’re telling me our extremely brief sham relationship felt believable to you? I’m surprised. Romance isn’t something you can just… force.”

And Rapunzel gets that – no, really, she does. While her relationship with Eugene has had its share of rough patches over the years, it’s something that happened organically. After all that she’s been through with Cassandra, it should have been obvious that she’d never had even an ounce of fondness towards the guy she had almost mercilessly swindled. Some small part of Rapunzel just wanted Cass to have felt happy and safe with someone in the days before they got together, she supposes.

“I guess back then I didn’t know you as well as I thought I did,” Rapunzel admits. She etches out Cassandra’s sturdy frame in shades of moss green, each stroke a little bolder than the last. “Maybe I still don’t. But I’d like to, you know! Has there ever been someone else you liked, as more than a friend?”

“...Once,” Cass begrudgingly admits. “It’s not exactly a happy story.”

“But it’s your story.” Rapunzel peers around the canvas to meet Cass’s reluctant gaze. “If you’re willing to share it, I’m here to listen.”

“God, I’ve never talked about this with anyone,” Cass sighs, folding her arms over her chest. This time, Rapunzel doesn’t bother asking her to move back into her original pose, out of fear of detracting from the story. “Well, anyone who doesn’t already know, anyway.”

“It won’t leave this room,” Rapunzel promises. She mixes a shade darker than the tunic and begins to fleck in little details. Stitches, tears, stains, anything to bring the girl on her canvas to life as the girl in front of her begins to recount her tale.

“...Her name was Alix. When I was turned fourteen my education was finished and I got indoctrinated into being a palace maid by my father. Alix was the same age as me but had been working there much longer, so she sort of took me under her wing and taught me the basics of, y'know, folding laundry properly! Making beds to the palace standards! All that stuff.”

“You've never mentioned an Alix before,” Rapunzel murmurs. She tries to conjure an image of this elusive Alix. Was she pretty? Did they understand each other on levels Rapunzel fears the two of them might never? Did she go charging in out of the goodness of her heart, blind to the consequences, like Rapunzel so often does when it comes to Cassandra’s wellbeing?

“There's a reason for that,” Cass sighs. She peeks over at Rapunzel doubtfully. “This... isn't going to paint me in a favourable light.”

“I can take it!” Rapunzel says, almost indignantly. She reaches over, standing on her tiptoes and stretching out her arm as far as it’ll reach past the canvas, to squeeze Cassandra's hand. “It’s me, Cass. You can tell me.”

Cassandra cracks a smile and hangs her head. “All right, all right! But you've been warned. Okay, so... just over a year after we first met, we started… I don’t know, being a couple, I guess. Iit wasn’t anything serious. Or maybe it was. I don't know, it was my first time just – just being with somebody, you know? It was all new to me – liking somebody, liking another girl.”

Rapunzel tries to picture an adolescent Cass, running arm-in-arm with this girl, whose features she just can’t seem to imagine. It’s pretty surreal, seeing as Cass was such a closed-off person when they first met, that she could ever be this giggly teenager smitten over a first crush. Then again, hasn’t Rapunzel been witness to moments like that, when she takes Cassandra’s hand unexpectedly, or hugs her from behind, or puts into words just how much she cares for her?

Against her better judgement, Rapunzel abandons detailing on the tunic and focuses on Cassandra’s face instead, wishing to capture a hint of that life in her eyes; memories of times she’s caught her unguarded, rather than the gloomy face of her girlfriend in front of her.

“So the Day of Hearts is approaching,” Cass continues, “and we’ve been together for a few months. It’s been great. But then one day Alix decides that when the day rolls around, the two of us are going to sign Herz Der Sonne’s journal together.”

“Wow, that’s… that’s a big step.” What else can she say? She and Eugene only signed their names last year, and they’d waited to get engaged before feeling ready to take that next step. She can only imagine the immense pressure someone like Cass, who has always been skittish about committing to anything in the department of romance, would feel when propositioned with something like that.

“Thank you, exactly! It felt like the biggest deal in the world! It was a big commitment, we were way too young, and I didn’t even think we were together long enough to do something like that.”

Rapunzel frowns. “So what happened?”

“We argued about it.” Cass snorts. “She called me chicken, like if she psyched me out enough I’d change my mind. Can you imagine that, saying it’s chicken for not wanting to commit to someone when you’re just barely fifteen?”

Rapunzel can’t imagine. At fifteen she’d never even met someone she could consider a romantic interest. Even the few books in the tower gave her a very limited view on what romance was.

“Anyway, I told her no. A firm no. I didn’t mind us spending the day together, but I didn’t want a written reminder that would show the whole world who we were. Of course, that turned into a fight about, you know, identity politics and pride in ourselves and stuff that as a kid I really didn’t think too much about. Well, she stormed off and I finished my shift as normal.”

Cass’s face changes a little, from this tired exasperation to… something of a stormy expression. “But I didn’t realise that she’d swiped my keys in the heat of our argument. That night, she snuck in and signed our names in the book after dark.”

Rapunzel’s jaw drops.

“But – but that’s against everything the ritual stands for! It’s something couples are meant to do together, with – with complete honesty!”

“Alix didn’t exactly care much about the rules, it’s what drew us together in the first place. Anyway, the next day she told me all about it, like it was something to be proud of. Really gloated that now we were serious and she’d done it because she wasn’t afraid of her feelings or what anybody thought about us.” Cassandra’s eyes narrow at the memory. “So I took a swing at her.”

“With a sword?!” Rapunzel frets.

“What? No, with the end of my broom. We were working. You think I’d still be working in the palace when we met if I’d struck another maid down with a sword?” Cass’s mouth draws into a grim line, and she suddenly finds herself incredibly interested in her own feet. “Well, that turned into the two of us physically fighting, so we were put on latrine duty as punishment and my dad was summoned. I was so distraught about what happened I couldn’t even think about explaining it to him, but somebody happened to overhear what we were fighting about and showed him the book.”

She falls quiet, and the silence stretches on. Rapunzel stops her almost frantic etching of facial features to peer past her canvas in concern, before Cass finally speaks up again. “That’s how he found out about me. About who I was.”

“Are you okay?” Rapunzel asks quietly.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s just kind of a horrible way for it all to go down, right?” She looks over at Rapunzel, eyes almost blazing, and utters, “My dad is a good man. He saw how furious and upset I was and marched right to the king to explain the situation. Hours later, our names were papered over and we pretty much never spoke of it again.”

Rapunzel thinks back to the times over the years that she’s spent flipping through the pages of the journal, recalling the one page with a simple square of embossed lilac paper neatly concealing the paper beneath, clearly a later edition. She had always wondered about it.

“And what happened to Alix?” Rapunzel ventures, as she mixes a deep raven for Cassandra’s hair.

“She was fired for breaking into the throne room after hours and desecrating royal property,” Cass recalls with a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. “After all, your father is a stickler for tradition. Last I heard she took up a post in Pittsford, but I don’t keep tabs on her or anything.” She spreads her arms out in a theatrical gesture. “Anyway, there you have it. My very sad, very brief experience of love.”

“She sounds awful,” Rapunzel declares, shaking her head in disdain. Cass shrugs.

“She wasn’t. Misguided, inconsiderate and a horrible decision-maker, yes, but she wasn’t a bad person. We were kids. I like to think she’s embarrassed about what happened, but I guess we’ll never know.”

“...So that’s the real reason you hate the Day of Hearts.”

“Raps, we went through this already!” groans Cass. “It’s not to do with any one thing, I just… don’t care for commercial romance and public holidays, that’s all there is to it.” She pinches her brow tiredly. “But I hated the book for years after. Just knowing our names were in there, even if no one else could see, just made me mad.”

“I’m sorry that it happened to you,” Rapunzel says gently. “It wasn’t a fair situation.”

“Yeah, well, what’s done is done. Look, uh…” Cass folds her arms, shifting from one foot to the other uncomfortably. “Can you… not tell Eugene about any of that? Or anyone? Not like… that I’m a lesbian, you can tell anybody that. In fact, I’m pretty sure Eugene already knows that part. But… all the stuff about Alix. That whole chapter of my life is kind of embarrassing, and I just. I don’t like to bring it up, so.”

“Cassandra, I promised you,” Rapunzel says, setting down her paintbrush and moving over to her. She grabs her hand and squeezes tight. “This is between us. No matter what.”

Pinched expression melting into relief, Cass squeezes back and squares her shoulders. “Thanks. So, can I see this painting yet? Or move from this spot, at least?”

“Sure, come here.”

Rapunzel leads her over to admire the canvas. The painting is a little odd, compared to Rapunzel’s typical style; the pose is stiff and vacant, just as Cassandra had been stood herself, but the ferocious brush strokes and tiny details woven in amplify the tension radiating from her body language, almost to the point of appearing antagonistic. Likewise, her expression is bright, wide-eyed and challenging; just as it is when Rapunzel says something overtly romantic or daring that takes her away from her usual focused exterior.

The amalgamation of those characteristics creates a vision of Cass that looks ready to jump up and pick a fight at any moment. Rapunzel glances over at Cass, an apology on the tip of her tongue, only to find that her girlfriend looks somewhere between amused and enamoured by the final product.

“I, um, didn’t mean to paint you looking so confrontational,” Rapunzel begins.

“Are you kidding me? I love this! Look, Raps, as much as I love your usual paintings of the two of us smiling at each other and hugging in a meadow or the like, this… it’s unusual for you. It’s fierce. I really, really love it.”

She leans down and presses a kiss to the top of Rapunzel’s head, before pulling her into a side hug. Rapunzel leans into the hug, beaming up at her.

“I’m glad you like it. It makes the standing in one spot for too long worthwhile, doesn’t it?”

“Ehh, almost. I wouldn’t push it too hard, Raps.”

“...Hey, Cass?”

“Mhm?”

“Do you think you’ll ever write your name in Herz Der Sonne’s journal, after what happened?”

“Maybe. See, now that you mention it, there’s this girl who I really like…” Rapunzel cranes her neck to look up at her, unimpressed, and Cass’s mouth quirks into a grin. “I’m talking about you, Raps. Just so we’re clear.”

“No, no, by all means! If there’s someone you’d like me to meet…”

“Well, I’ll give you a hint, it’s definitely not Andrew.”

“Thank goodness for that.” Rapunzel reaches up to cup Cass’s face, gently pulling her in close. “And it’s definitely not that jerk Alix, right?”

Cassandra’s grin grows wider. “You’re not jealous of the girlfriend I briefly had when I was a teenager, are you, Rapunzel?”

“What? No! I just, y’know, wish she’d treated you better, that’s all,” Rapunzel grumbles. “You deserve better, Cass. You deserve the world and more.”

With a huff of laughter, Cass leans in and kisses Rapunzel softly. “Lucky for me, my current girlfriend knows how to treat me right.”

“You know, my magic girlfriend powers work best on the Day of Hearts,” Rapunzel trills, twirling a strand of Cassandra’s hair around her finger. “Just so you’re aware.”

Cass groans. “I better not regret it if I agree to stick around this year.”

“You won’t! We’ll keep it nice and lowkey. You’ll never even know it’s the most romantic day of the year!”

“Uh huh, keep talking…”

Maybe this year won’t be the year. In fact, after everything Cass has told her today, wouldn’t it be super insensitive to broach the topic of signing the book together in two days time? Still, as she glances back to the painting of the tough fighter of a woman staring back at her, warmth washes over her, settling comfortably in the pit of her stomach.

Some day, when the timing is right, wouldn’t it be wonderful?

[a-song-of-quill-and-feather]

Harry Potter OC Masterlist

Tag: oc: amoretta tonks

FC: Crystal Reed

Love Interest: Cedric Diggory / Fred Weasley

Story: Twisted Fates

Summary: Life was good.

Amoretta Tonks headed into her 6th year at Hogwarts with that thought to her mind. Life was good. She had finished her OWLs the year before with good marks, and had figured the only thing ahead that she had to worry about this year was what sort of trouble Harry Potter would bring to Hogwarts. Though really even that she worried little over, it hardly ever reached her sphere of Hogwarts with her being older and in an entirely different house. Really she just had to worry whether it’d effect quidditch or not.

Plus she had Cedric. Finally, after years of friendship and crushing and pining, she had him.

So life was good.

But then the Triwizard Tournament is announced, and feeling settles over her that something bad was coming. Dreams wrack her mind at all hours of graveyards and death. And when Cedrics name is pulled from the Goblet she is struck by an all encompassing dread that grows and grows as they pass through each task.

But life was supposed to be good.

Tag: oc: beatrice dursley

FC: Kaylee Bryant

Love Interest: Ron Weasley

Story: State of Possession

Summary: Beatrice Dursley grew up fairly unobtrusively. With her older brother demanding—and getting—most of the attention from their parents, and her cousin drawing— however unintended—the ire from them. She was left to her own devices for the most part, enjoying her own quiet room or the front garden where she could play about the flowers. She knew odd things happened occasionally around her, but she never really noticed them. 

Then letters come for Harry and she learns that there is such thing as magic in the world. She doesn’t pay it much mind, sure it was rather funny to see Dudley get the tail, and the giant man that came to see Harry didn’t seem as bad as her father seemed to rant on about. But it didn’t have anything to do with her, until the start of summer when she turned eleven and a witch showed up at Privet Drive with a letter just like Harry’s for her.

Tag: oc: cadence hearthorn

FC: Bella Heathcote

Love Interest: Sirius Black

Story: And Into the Woods I Go [Ao3] [FFN]

Summary: Cadence Hearthorn doesn’t truly understand her relationship with Sirius Black.

Her relationship with Regulus is quite clear to her, they’ve been the best of friends and each others anchors in the political mine-field that is Slytherin house since their first year. The both of them striving to secure their spots amongst their peers. With Regulus working hard to detract attention from his brothers rebellion against their family, and Cadence struggling to bring her families name back to reputable status as the first magic user in generations.

But Sirius Black has confounded Cadence since the summer before her fourth year when she stayed at Grimmauld Place and met the elder Black brother more surely than she had ever before. He challenges her views and ambitions, and at the very least it seems she sparks his curiosity much the same. Especially after he wakes her from a dream where she saw the truth of one of his best friends deepest secrets.

Tag: oc: cassiopeia malfoy

FC: Jenny Boyd

Love Interest: George Weasley

Story: Mischief & Manners [Ao3] [FFN]

Summary: Cassiopeia knows what’s expected of her as the daughter of a pureblooded house. She knows that after Hogwarts she’ll get married off to a rich pureblooded wizard of good standing with whom she’ll be expected to have proper pureblooded children. She’ll be a good pureblood witch and follow her parents example and she’ll show that despite her more rebellious youth she can do as is expected of her, that it was all just a simple toeing of the line but not any serious deviation.

Cassiopeia knows that if it were entirely her own choice she’d make use of the N.E.W.T.S that she knows she’ll score perfectly on and become a healer. If it were her choice she’d continue on with Fred and George for the rest of her life and help them with their developing line of prank products even after their school years have ended. If it were her own choice she’d tell George her feelings and be with someone she chooses rather than someone chosen for her. If it were her choice she’d make something of her life that was challenging and brilliant and utterly hers.

Cassiopeia knows that for all her wants and rebellions she’ll do what she can for her family in the end, even if it means sacrificing her own choices.

Tag: oc: dahlia potter

FC: Holland Roden

Love Interest: Draco Malfoy

Story: Dream to See [Ao3] [FFN]

Summary: Twin to the Boy who Lived, Dahlia grew up alongside her brother Harry under the care of the Dursley’s. She always did her best to keep herself happy while also protecting Harry when she could. Thus when the twins acceptance to Hogwarts comes she is ready to move forward, away from the apparent hatred from their relatives and into the magic that a part of her had always known she held.

But then Harry goes into Gryffindor, after she had already been put in Slytherin. Leading her to deal with the fact that she’s separated from the brother she’s always strived to protect. She is left to the house that had held the man who killed their parents, to strange dreams that have haunted her for as long as she can remember, and to the blonde haired brat who seems determined to either get her to love him or hate him. 

Despite it all Dahlia Potter perseveres through her years at Hogwarts with a determination to succeed.

Tag: oc: evie tatters

FC: Danielle Rose Russell

Love Interest: Harry Potter

Story: TBD

Summary: Evie Tatters is a witch.

Her parents had always said there was something special about her, but she’d always chalked that up to being a thing all parents told their children to make them feel special. But when a tall woman came to their home on Privet Drive telling her that she was indeed special, in comparison to muggles at least, Evie was determined to prove her entirely right.

It was just an added bonus that her best friend Harry also proved to be special. Though apparently he was special even in the world of magic. Not that she would let that affect her view of him, or if she could help it let it affect his view of himself, no she was simply overjoyed that she wasn’t going to a school where she’d know absolutely no one all on her own.

Of course then she gets put into a house that tells her she’s not special, rather she’s wrong and bad and does not belong.

Of course, that just makes her all the more determined to prove each and every one of them wrong and show them just how special she is.

Tag: oc: jeanie prewett

FC: Sophie Skelton

Love Interest: Marlene McKinnon / Nymphadora Tonks

Story: TBD

Summary: Jeanie Prewett was a witch, in her own opinion, who was exceptionally gifted. 

Thus, it only made sense that she’d join up with the Order of the Phoenix come leaving Hogwarts.

Jeanie Prewett, in her own opinion, was quite skilled at fighting death eaters. And she had a bloody good time doing it as well. Alongside her brothers Gideon and Fabian she did her duty to the Order, and the greater wizarding community, and worked hard to end the reign of terror the Dark Lord was bringing to Britain.

Thus it only made sense that she was with her brothers when they died. But Jeanie Prewett did not die that day. No matter what was presumed when her body was not found. 

Because Jeanie Prewett was an exceptionally gifted witch who enjoyed experimenting with difficult magics and had, a few weeks prior, found an illegal time turner that she kept for private research. Thus, when her brother’s and her were set upon by death eaters, she in a spur of reckless caution turned the piece in hopes of saving the day. 

Of course, it wasn’t a regulation time turner and she had tinkered with it some. And so, in a dizzying sense of magic (that felt very much like falling upwards) she found it had nowhere near the effect that she’d hoped for. 

Jeanie Prewett was a witch who opened her eyes to find herself stood in an entirely unfamiliar time that was heading into a very familiar war.

Tag: oc: lyra black

FC: Phoebe Tonkin

Love Interest: Remus Lupin

Story: TBD

Summary: Lyra Black has been hearing things she’s not supposed to all her life. 

When she was little she heard of Bellatrix’s plans for the muggle family that lived down the way. She heard of Andromeda’s secret friendship with a muggleborn. She heard of Narcissa’s secret hiding spot for her things that she didn’t want her sisters to touch. 

She heard other things too, just thoughts passing through the heads of those around her. 

Her mother and Bellatrix insisted it was a gift. A thing most wizards and witches would have to work years and years to have even the base natural skill Lyra shows. A gift Lyra knows Bellatrix thinks is wasted upon her. 

But it was a gift she didn’t particularly want. And thus since she was little, Lyra Black tried very hard not to hear things she was not supposed to. 

But sometimes her focus slips and things slip through the cracks. Sometimes she sits beside a tired looking boy in Transfiguration and hears his pain and wonders on it just the second needed to see something she was never supposed to hear.

Tag: oc: tristram crouch

FC: Richard Harmon

Love Interest: Hermione Granger

Story: State of Forgetting

Summary: When Tristram Crouch enters his fourth year at Hogwarts he’s acutely aware of one pressing issue. He’s missing something. He’s certain if he got his hands on a remembrall it would smoke up faster than the fireplace in the Hufflepuff common room on chilly days. But he’s also certain it’s not an object that he’s missing.

No. He’s quite certain that whatever’s missing from him is missing from his head. A memory, he thinks, lost from his mind and leaving him rather pissed at its absence. And it’s not something small. No, he thinks it’s actually rather big. Which only pisses him off further.

So, he turns to the most brilliant witch of their age (at least that’s what he’s heard plenty of people call her) and asks for her help in figuring out memory magic in order to get whatever it is back into his mind where it belongs.

[vaperoad1-blog]

Vape Road

Our degree of administration is unparalleled without the market and our vaping specialists are available to help you locate the ideal Vape Road, starter units, and all the more so you can genuinely make the most of your vaping experience.

The secret and concern remain. Furthermore, numerous smokers who utilize these gadgets to stop are worried that a significant Vape Road might be detracted from them.

There's considerably more that analysts need to know. These gadgets have a short history. As a Vape Road who concentrates how individuals use tobacco items, I accept that clients' conduct is critical to understanding the positive and negative wellbeing impacts coming about because of e-cigarettes. All things considered, their purpose was to help individuals quit smoking, the main source of preventable demise in the U.K.

The manner in which clients puff, how long they puff and what they puff all assume a job. We don't yet have the foggiest idea how this conduct influences the amount of every substance vapers burn-through throughout the span of their day by day lives, however we have motivation to trust it is huge.

Many are doubtful that e-cigarettes will lessen demise rates identified with smoking. Verifiably more secure cigarettes have not conveyed on a comparable guarantee. After the U.S. top health spokesperson pronounced smoking unsafe in 1964, smokers who couldn't stop moved to what exactly were then viewed as low-yield cigarettes, showcased as more secure and having less tar than standard cigarettes.

However, the wide utilization of low-yield cigarettes didn't bring down death rates for smokers. Instances of squamous cell cellular breakdown in the lungs did diminish after the top health spokesperson's admonition, yet another sort, adenocarcinoma, expanded.

Designing models recommend that adjustments in smoke qualities joined with smokers' remunerating practices changed where the particles kept in the lung assumed a job. Smokers may have burned-through more smoke to keep up their fixation. Distinctive malignant growth types start in various lung areas. The contemplation is that smokers changed their conduct, and in doing as such, may have exchanged one kind of malignancy for another.

[acrianswashere]

A real Occultist Debunks “Selling Your Soul”

Hot take this was ripped from my Wordpress, and Magick Journal I highly recommend checking out at the links above.

You ever read something so fuking asinine you want to claw your eyes out? Not everybody is Christian. Not every religion is Christianity. not all magick and holy sacred power comes from your Jesus. Selling your soul isn’t real. That’s not how this works beyond your feeble religious understanding. Today we’re going to be debunking Robert Johnson and how he “sold his soul” at the crossroads. Hot take: he didn’t.

For starters who is Robert Johnson? He’s a famous blues singer. He’s infamous for the before statement. Robert Johnson as a person doesn’t matter to much. I’m not really into blues and while I respect it as a genre with a history I could care less. What matters is this myth surrounding him and his music. Lots of people think he “sold his soul” for some kind of skill with the guitar. That, because he pledged himself to Satan he got his ability. Let’s get one thing out of the way. That doesn’t happen.

If you are familiar with this blog (I’m assuming you’re not) you’ll know I do magick. The real kind. Not that harry potter bullshit you see in movies. I am a left handed sorcerer who works frequently with demons. With the dark. Magick some people would consider to be black or inherently evil given the subject matter. Stuff drenched in what you stereo-typically view as the “occult”.

I promise you that the black man at the crossroads ain’t a demon but now we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Point is I do this shit for real. Solomonic tradition and the like. I’ve read my fair share of goetic based texts and fancy golden rimmed grimoires. I know demons well.

So why do I think as someone embedded in this that this is horseshit? Cus it is. When you work with spirits for any long period of time you’ll eventually have to pay them for their work. Nobody does any kind of labor for anyone for free whether you’re a human or a ghost. Spirits can be paid in a lot of ways from them asking you to write a song or throwing a rock in a pond, to giving them cake. Spirits can be paid with tasks or offerings. But your soul is worth nothing to them.

Your soul isn’t worth anything on the astral plane. It’s not something you can pay somebody with. It’s nontransferable. No one wants it and nobody will take it. You can promise your essence in devotion to someone, you can promise service, you can be a sword and a shield sure. But your soul is worth nothing. Nobody cares about it.

When it comes to dealing with the devil the myth arises from actuality. When it comes to demons or even other spirits like fae, you can bargain and barter with them. You can sign contracts with entities where they promise you something in exchange for something else. This something has to be something you can give them. Such as food, incense, art that sort of thing. You can’t really give anyone your soul it doesn’t work that way. 

Spirits do want stuff from you but they don’t want your soul. You can sign contracts with demons but they’re not gona ask for that in return. They may ask for something big but never that. It’s just not of value to them. They may ask for big metaphorical concepts like your divinity, your fame, or your loyalty but not your soul. Anything that’s asks you for your soul, chances are is trying to fuck with your head and only wants to parasitically feed off you. But we’re not gona get into Jellyfish here.

So yeah you can make an agreement with a demon, sign a contract with one also. But your not gona go to hell for it, and your certainly not giving them your soul.

Also Robert Johnson? Wasn’t a left handed guy. He was someone who practiced Hoodoo (not demons) which is a kind of African folk magick that comes from a variety of influences. Dollies are European In origin and while they made their way in some Hoodoo practices and even Voodoo it doesn’t change the fact that they are originally European.

[Barber, Chad. Infernal Conjure Craft. HADEAN PRESS, 2011. 1 vols.]

Hot take: it’s not cultural appropriation to work with dollies in that form. But that’s another misunderstanding and issue for another day.

So I mean reflecting did Robert Johnson do magick? Yes he did. He did Hoodoo. He references Mojo hands and other practices in his music. Those are Hoodoo things. Hoodoo ain’t evil. Just because it’s magick doesn’t make it “of the devil” and in retrospect that’s a super naive way to think of things. Especially given Hoodoo’s blend of cultures and origins which I’m not gona touch here because I am far from and authority on that matter.

 The world doesn’t revolve around Christianity and regardless of whether you practice Christianity or not you can’t really filter it all through that lens if you want a proper perspective. Other religions, other practices exist it doesn't mean its YOUR devil in disguise tempting people to sin via their belief.

[Yronwode, Catherine. “http://www.luckymojo.com/crossroads.html.” Luky Mojo Curio Co,

   www.luckymojo.com/crossroads.html.]

Hell, Christian Magick exists and the miracles Yeshua himself performed were inherently of a divine supernatural presence (you know the big guy). That’s magick whether holy or not. But now we’re detracting.

Point is regarding Robert Johnson, the dude did do magick. He did Hoodoo. That doesn’t mean that he sold his soul. Also the whole crossroads thing? Yeah there is a ritual you can do to achieve a skill set that is known as “that one crossroads ritual everybody talks about whenever the crossroads in magick are even briefly mentioned”. You enter in to an agreement with an entity known as The Black Man by going to the crossroads for a set time frame. Then he then aids you in your attempts to learn whatever the skill you asked for afterwords. 

It’s a Hoodoo ritual and I know so because I’ve done it. (See my magical journal entries night 1 through night 7) Certain pantheons have certain vibes and this one was African in nature. The exact origin or creator of it I can not tell you but it has a vibe that doesn’t scream to me demon. Plus some of my demons don’t get along well with him which wouldn’t of have happened the way it did for me had he been one of them.

We don’t really have any historical evidence that Robert Johnson himself even bothered to do this ritual. You can speculate but it doesn’t change the fact that we simply don’t know and what we do know we can’t pinpoint. We only have second hand sources from other people rather than statements made by the man. Crossroads are just a thing in Hoodoo. They are a thing in a lot of magick and religions. I mean the Greeks had Hekate. who is wonderful and that was/still is her thing. The heathens have Wodin. Crossroad deities are everywhere. They are not regulated to one specific faith or practice alone. Nor should they be.

So him singing a song about the crossroads or rituals related to it means absolutely nothing. Did he wake up good at guitar? It’s possible. Was a ritual involved? Yeah I’ll give you that. Did he sell his soul to do it? No. He didn't. The reason this association is even here in the first place is because of his friend Tommy Johnson. No before you ask they weren’t related. Tommy Johnson did this ritual. He painted it for whatever reason as a satanic thing and marketed himself accordingly. He also did Hoodoo so take that as you will. He wasn’t really as well known even if his guitar playing was better than Roberts. This was later adapted into a published fictional book where the myth of Robert doing it arose in popculture.

So that’s the truth it’s not as exciting as a conspiracy theory drenched in Christianity.  The ritual is real. I talk about it in my oddly titled book “how to sell your soul and other nifty things. A beginners guide to black magick.” which has yet to come out despite it’s misnomer of a title. if you want guides on that ritual I can’t really help you but earlier in this article I linked my journal experience of me doing the ritual which is the only deviation out there from the standard fair you find online. But it’s really best performed at an abandoned location for as long as possible, with information regarding it gathered from places outside the internet. (The internet won’t properly prepare you for this ritual you need to go buy some books).

So yeah you can do Hoodoo and a crossroads ritual to achieve a skill. You can sign pacts with demons. You can use magick to get famous even though we didn’t discuss that here. But you can’t sell your soul. It’s worth nothing. The crossroads ritual has nothing to do with the christian devil and you don’t go to any sort of hell for performing it. It’s possible that Robert didn't even do the ritual though that really is a matter of opinion at this point. Tommy did the ritual. Tommy marketed himself poorly. So maybe before you perpetrate a myth like this do a sting of research and discover that life is way more interesting and elaborate and magick is far more detailed than some industry based conspiracy theory about getting famous and good at shit with no effort.

My name is Acrians Locket. I’m snarky and bitter. My blog is currently aimed at beginners who have an interest in the real versions of this sort of stuff outside of hogwarts ridden movies. I hope you enjoyed and check me out. Chow

-Acrians Locket

Further Reading:

Baby’s first demons:

Best Book For Beginners

Companion to the keys of Solomon

Demon Dictionary

This Youtube Channel [e.a koetting]

This Youtube Channel [Orlee Stewart]

Other magick (not my forte though I’m exploring it right now so forgive the lack of links)

This Youtube Channel [Arziana EverDark]

This Author [Taylor Ellwood]

This Site [More traditional based shit, legit and good]

[I’m not linking any crossroads stuff it’s linked previously if you actually click the hyperlinks I included within my article.]

MY magickal Blog

MY magickal Youtube

My Magickal Journal

[gunpan48]

3m Safety And Security Reading Glasses

Signs And Symptoms Of Vision Issues

#toc background: #f9f9f9;border: 1px solid #aaa;display: table;margin-bottom: 1em;padding: 1em;width: 350px; .toctitle font-weight: 700;text-align: center;

Content

What Triggers Ocular Pain?

Searching For A Reduced Vision Aid To Eliminate Vision Loss? Take The Irisvision Test.

Common Eye Disorders.

What Is Glue For Glasses Frames.

Nose Pads Keep Glasses Comfortable.

What Causes Ocular Pain?

Forty I made use of a fluid called acetone, secure the break and melt the brake with an eye dropper I dealt with numerous pair, and now I wear wire frames.The declines of acetone thaws the break comparable to weilding. Try several of the quick setting JB Weld, The rapid type held some plastic that the old standby JB counldn't. I glued it from the within to permit the adhesive to permeate into the crack as well as fill the space up, worked flawlessly.

Glass adhesives are commonly solvent-free, UV and weather-resistant as well as have an extremely high resistance to mechanical stress. If you intend to use the silicone adhesive on a terrarium or fish tank, you need to make certain it appropriates. Sanitary silicone, in particular, commonly has an antifungal impact of preventing mold growth in the washroom. This is obviously a wonderful benefit when used in moist spaces, yet fungicides are damaging to animals and also water organisms.

After I was particular the glue was gone from the delicate white of my eyes, I extremely gingerly blinked. I was overjoyed when my eye resumed without sticking itself closed, and also discharge a deep sigh of alleviation. I would certainly managed to adhesive the light bulb owner back with each other, and additionally glue the tube to my fingers.

Looking For A Reduced Vision Help To Fight Vision Loss? Take The Irisvision Trial.

As the name implies, the Devcon 2-Ton epoxy is made for very sturdy use. It has great impact toughness, is non-shrinking, as well as keeps good clarity once it dries out. Other than being water resistant, it was also formulated to stand up to solvents, fuel, oil, mineral spirits, and anti-freeze.

Nevertheless, this is not your perfect epoxy if you remain in a hurry. The Devcon 2-Ton Epoxy has an exceptionally lengthy setting time of 20 mins, with complete treating just expected after about 12 hours. The E6000 was specifically formulated with craft-making in mind. In spite of its stamina, it preserves a good action of versatility when dry. It is clear and also is easily paintable, so it should not detract from the aesthetics of your crafts.

Art Bell once glued his lips virtually together obtaining the cap off with his teeth throughout a break. When he came back on after the break a humorous event occurred live to us radio audiences in the millions. Being a significant fan of Ghost Peppers, I've gotten powder or oil in my eyes more than a couple of times. Yet not so chilli pepper, which as soon as resulted in a blind rescue trip to medical facility as well as an eye spot for a number of weeks. I take place to keep my superglue in the shower room purposefully-- appropriate next to the plasters so that I can spot a cut from an airplane or a razor operating in the store.

What does OD mean after a doctors name?

An optometrist receives a doctor of optometry (OD) degree after completing four years of optometry school, preceded by three years or more years of college.

Robert's walking cane maintained falling over when he had to use his hands. Adding magnets made it easy for him to complete his everyday tasks without needing to fret about fetching his cane regularly. The numbers and also dials on cleaning makers, microwaves, ovens as well as various other appliances can be little as well as difficult to read. Throughout the years our neighborhood has actually made use of Sugru to make points extra visible and also also included tactile pens to assist individuals with damaged vision. It worked initially for initial two goes, after that the thin needle appicator came undone and also it had to be utilized as regular adhesive i.e. an opening as well as pressed glue out appeared in bigger blobs.

It's a pity that the secretary did not have some nail gloss cleaner handy. The non-irritant kind (n-Butyl cyanoacrylate) which is also authorized for usage on human beings, is rather pricey.

If adhesive continues to be after using warm soapy water, it will certainly usually de-bond within a number of days due to basic damage and also the all-natural oils in the skin. " Want to make fish pot, we have ten mm glass. Got good info with actions, thank you." " I am planning on crafting with glass marbles & half rounds & required information on just how to go about it. Thanks to all writers for producing a page that has been read 571,551 times. wikiHow is a "wiki," comparable to Wikipedia, which means that most of our short articles are co-written by several writers.

Repairing fragile valuables or cherished accessories can lead to additional damages as well as frustration if you do not have the right tools. Because of its numerous resistance to wetness, reduced temperature, and also different chemicals, the Loctite Professional adhesive makes sure resilient bonding with keep the optimum effectiveness. Exactly how old are the glasses you might be able to obtain them replaced if they aren't also old. I suggest utilizing a toothpick to use the combined epoxy to the glasses.

Once the components are adhered, leave them uninterrupted for a minimum of 10 mins. Repairing glass can be complicated, however it does not need to be. A couple of easy preventive actions can make the distinction. The most effective way to attain enduring results is to plan in advance.

I've utilized a small old drill little bit, and also tight galvanized cord. A drill little bit can repair the earpiece, as well as the cord can be formed around contours in the glass holding areas.

The epoxy retains its strength in severe hot and cold as well as can be utilized for acrylic, steel, glass, concrete, and ceramic. Eliminate any extra fragments or glass fragments obstructing a perfect seal. If you do discover spaces in between glass items, select a gap-filling adhesive such as Loctite Go2 Gel.

Common Eye Disorders.

Top-Specs embeds in the presence of wetness, so this can additionally make it most likely the eyelids become adhered to the eyeball too. I then proceeded to delicately wipe away solidified adhesive from my reduced eyelid as well as eyelashes.

What Is Glue For Glasses Frames.

I'm a jewelry maker and it doesn't stay with my pearls or crystals - as anticipated - as I use it for glueing knots on stretch string. I've stated, yes, permanently value, as it had not been also pricey for needle application adhesive - yet if only it worked effectively - maybe I had a dud one. I make my own sterling silver wire wrapped Sea Glass as well as Gemstones. This glue is amazingly solid and dries out clear which is excellent.

The worst little bit was what got under my eylid the unpleasant effect was quiet undesirable, took a trip to the doctor to have it cleaned out, fortunately no permenant damages. This certain little girl has offered me numerous terrific tales like securing the "Care construction zone" sign by running over it with her auto. She came home with the best front panel of her cars and truck in the trunk. Since then I've used hardware-store grade CA many lot of times to knit up little cuts, and also it's remarkable. Maintains them with each other for 3-4 days and afterwards just peels/ dismiss.

Once all was tranquil, I determined to begin my research study into just how negative that can have been. This implied a briny eye rinse was offered, and also I purged my eye repetitively without blinking.

What kind of glue do I use when covering bottles with thread? I've tried wood adhesive, however it's not offering me what I want.

The lines of type get smaller as you relocate down the chart.

Your near vision additionally might be checked, using a card with letters similar to the far-off eye graph.

During a refraction analysis, your doctor asks you to check out a masklike gadget that contains wheels with various lenses having different toughness to aid determine which combination provides you the sharpest vision.

Your doctor asks you to determine different letters of the alphabet printed on a chart or a screen placed some distance away.

Most individuals will not experience unfavorable results from a short program of unnecessary anti-biotics, Stein states, however there are threats.

Start with a clean, dry surface area that is free of oil, wax, paint, or any kind of sort of soapy deposit. Any excess material, even fingerprints, may stop a solid bond. Taking care of smooth surfaces and sharp edges can be irritating. Gluing that damaged rear-view mirror or cracked wineglass back with each other can be harder than it first seems.

What is eye doctor called?

An ophthalmologist — Eye M.D. — is a medical or osteopathic doctor who specializes in eye and vision care. Ophthalmologists differ from optometrists and opticians in their levels of training and in what they can diagnose and treat.

After that some years after, I saw just how a mom used the very same adhesive in the temple of his very own youngster that obtained a bleeding scrape. Instantly the kid quit blood loss and afterwards some ice was applied to avoid swelling, however later the child was allright runing everywhere again. some days later I reached see the kid once again and he hadn't got even a tiny mark of the swelling. This mom told me the exact same, the adhesive will certainly left the body in a number of days.

To produce this article, 20 individuals, some confidential, functioned to edit as well as boost it gradually. Operate in a well-ventilated area if you are making use of an adhesive that creates hazardous fumes. Some silicone adhesives come in a cyndrical tube with a plunger at one end as well as a nozzle at the various other.

We kept it wet to quit it from setting but however that did not function. It at some point came off with a combination of cutting his eyelashes, using a hot flannel compress and also selecting away at the glue. That was a really undesirable minute, however I was lucky and also just ended up with a cornea abscess and no vision loss.

These can be put into a "silicone weapon" for higher control over application. If you want to include mod-podge rather, that will certainly make it clear as well as shiny. Make use of some of the truly little bottles of industrial-strength glue. Be extremely cautious not to jump on your fingers in the process.

What are the different types of eye doctors?

Eye Doctors - Eye Doctors: Optometrists and Ophthalmologists There are two main types of eye doctors: ophthalmologists and optometrists. Confused about which is which and who does what? Here's a look at how they're different.

Nose Pads Keep Glasses Comfortable.

Complying with that, I'll share some basic tips for when you locate on your own in a sticky scenario. # 7 Take the glass out of the frame and make use of the glass cleaner and the towel to brighten up your mosaic. # 6 As soon as all your tiles have actually been carefully glued in position make certain to leave the mosaic over night to make sure that your adhesive can entirely cure. # 5 Once you more than happy with exactly how your mosaic looks not stuck down, you are ready to begin sticking points into place. You might require to take off a few pieces at once to make sure that as you push the floor tile into location the displaced glue does not half stick an additional floor tile down.

I don't really maintain eye drops accessible, to make sure that confusion is unlikely, but I might certainly see another person encountering that complication. I could begin buying the bright orange containers of superglue simply to be on the risk-free side ... I was residing in an unpleasant shared level where somebody leaving superglue in the bathroom wasn't that out of the ordinary.

The lengthy slim applicator tube is additionally great for getting the adhesive right into little limited areas. I would thoroughly suggest this for any type of fragile glueing. You'll see an approximated delivery date - opens in a new home window or tab based on the vendor's send off time and also delivery service. Delivery times may differ, especially throughout peak periods as well as will certainly depend upon when your settlement removes - opens in a brand-new window or tab. Rinse your fingers immediately with a lot of cozy soapy water and do not draw on the skin that has been glued.

Spray with a sealer to guarantee resilience and also water resistance. As soon as the very first layer has actually dried out, adding a small amount of adhesive to a location will certainly make it wet as well as tacky, preventing your designs from slipping.Wait an additional 5-10 minutes for this to take effect. For large level pieces of glass, repair them in position with a glass clamp or an additional clamp specialized for holding delicate things. Ensure the busted surfaces are straightened and hold in place for a minimum of one min. You will certainly utilize the wire to reinforce the location on both sides of the break.

Take care using any adhesive for seals revealed to extreme temperatures (over 180 ° F/82 ° C). E6000 Craft Adhesive can survive at any kind of temperature because of its commercial toughness top quality, which can provide you a maximum bonding efficiency. Cyanoacrylate "Super Glue" is the functional adhesive offered by Glue Masters.

If you desire, you can put a tablet computer or print out of a picture below to assist you draw out your lines. The dry eliminate pen can be easily abraded if you make any type of errors. When dealing with sharp-edged glass, there is, certainly, a danger of injury. Protect your fingers from sharp sides by masking them with a layer of clinical tape. In this way, you can maintain your haptic capacities without revealing your skin to unsafe fragments.

no matter what item you utilize, put covering up tape on your lens to shield it from any adhesive mishaps. These are a bit harder to make use of but they do give the best bond. Obtain the mixing taste buds and the little spatula as well as continue to blend equivalent parts of the tubes. It placed my mind secure when my child's eye crash obtained glued with each other. He was having a head wound glued up by an Emergency situation Doctor and some glue glided down into his eye.

How can I restore my eyesight to 20 20?

Keep reading to learn other ways you can improve your vision. 1. Get enough key vitamins and minerals. 2. Top-Specs forget the carotenoids. 3. Stay fit. 4. Manage chronic conditions. 5. Wear protective eyewear. 6. That includes sunglasses. 7. Follow the 20-20-20 rule. 8. Quit smoking. More items•

This can be performed with tidy water or a proper clinical solution, such as saline made use of by call lens users. Using anything to liquify the adhesive is an outright no-no. This will just offer to boost the possibility of gluing your eyes closed as the eyelids collaborated.

Hackaday presently appears like a pack of cigarettes in an international nation. You recognize, the ones that plaster images of malignant body organs and rotting faces on tobacco items to encourage individuals to quit.

This was quite standard procedure, so I wasn't specifically worried. However, as my figures drew devoid of television, the nozzle flipped a fat bead of glue straight in the direction of my face, touchdown in the corner of my eye.

From the outside with or without the light on you can not see the fracture anymore as well as it has held for about 4 months to date. Great for sticking little glass products; not so reliable on larger breaks. Moisten the glue tarnish with cozy water, after that carefully rub toothpaste over the discolor with a fabric.

I obtained the top of my ear cut while obtaining a haircut (blood all over!) and also went to the ER and they glued it back along with medical-grade CA. They could not have sewed anything so fine, and also it worked perfectly. One of the initial functions for CA adhesive was to close gunshot wounds during the Vietnam Battle. My doctor superglued my fingertip together after I inadvertently touched a running bandsaw.