#which ive never seen and i wanna see sooooo bad

[florida3exclamationpoints]

Hi besties it is whale day

[canayams-art]

yikes ik it's been a while, and trust me ive been meaning to talk more about qianqing, but the uni exams started and now i FINALLY found some free time (and a sticky note at the back of my brain reminding me) to talk 😭

also before anything SEASON 2 LOOKS SOOOO FREAKING GOOOD!! like in absolutely in love with mq and i thought i couldn't love him more but i was fortunately proven wrong ! also it dragged me back into fengqing so there's that hensndkeknd it only took few hot shots of fx and yeah i hate that i love them again but i do and there's nothing i can do about it but accept 😔✊ I HAD SUCH HIGH EXPECTATIONS FOR LQQ AND HE MET EVERY ONE OF THEM SJDJDJD HE LOOKS SO BABY and speaking of him, im sooooo curious what was your favorite lqq scene??

you seem to have read my thoughts when you answered my last ask because THOSE WERE EXACTLY THE SCENES I IMAGINED THEM IN!! mq nagging lqq about paperwork, friendly sparring, lqq sticking around mq during events in the heaven iejejekejej gods i wish i have more time so i can write something for them because this hasn't stopped itching my brain for weeks 😭

i also raise you that they go on missions together, because once mq gets comfortable and once he notices that lqq keeps inviting him, even if he doesn't need the help, he would invite lqq simply for the company!

lqq meeting fy on his purse of revenge could go into sooo many different directions!! like does lqq figure out fy is out on defending mq's name quest and is conflicted because he wants to help but also killing qr takes priority rn? does he try to convince fy to work together?? now i wanna explore every crevice of that meeting and make like thousands fics for it!!

(it's not out of the question, ive done aus out of my own aus! im sure if i find the time i could do this as well😭)

the thing about qiurong for me, as it is with many ships in big fandoms, it feels very forced ig by the fandom? i don't think im wording it correctly, but for me i usually don't end up liking many of those ships because it feels like people would just smush two characters together because they ran out of characters they can pair them with. and it's not necessarily a bad thing, but in this case the most im seeing from qiurong is fluffy family aus, which would never come to mind for me when i think about qr and lqq in a room together. again not a bad thing, not a bad ship, but personally not my cup of tea.

i do have to admit tho, im always kinda leaning towards more canon characterization, so i do have a particular tastes in ships i do ship and in definitely not one of the people who would read anything they can from the ships i like. so i think i wouldn't have gave up so quickly on quirong if i found something that suits my taste, because i do like both of their characters separately.

EXPLORING THE SIDE CHARACTERS RELATIONSHIPS IS ALWAYS THE BEST PART IN ANY FANDOM FOR ME!!! especially as someone whose faves are usually the side characters lol the creativity and the freedom of interpretation, diving deeper into them and putting them into situations and having to think about how they would act in them sjsjjsjd makes me crazy every time!

IVE SEEN YOUR LQQ/SQX ART AND OMG I WAS KICKING MY FEET ON MY BED LIKE A KID! EJJEJEEJ IT WAS SOO PRETTY!! GENUINELY LIVED IT! 😍😍😍

WELCOME BACK QIANQING ANON!! Best of luck with your exams! Make sure you find time to take breaks and rest your brain when you can!

For real though season 2 has been such a treat so far— visually stunning and so fun to watch. I know what you mean about sinking back into fengqing hell while watching it. I’ve been in the same position— once you go fengqing you can never leave fengqing. They’re still so important to me 🥹🥹🧡

ALSO LQQ IS JUST AS ENDEARING AND CHARMING AS I HOPED HE WOULD BE. The way he’s so expressive and always so honest— he wears his feelings at all times and it’s always been one of my favorite qualities of his. Also asking me to choose a fav lqq scene is cruel— I love them ALL!!! From his intervention in the gambler’s den and subsequent fight with Hua Cheng, to the way Xie Lian still wrangles him like they’re still teacher & student, to lqq’s “if I hadn’t stepped in, nobody else would,” to the anger and pain in his voice as he broke his own arm to make a fair duel against xl,,,,, there’s so many good scenes!!!!

I’m bouncing all of these qianqing scenarios around in my head but I’m also especially intrigued by a fy & lqq encounter. If lqq was already close with mq when he was put under house arrest, I don’t know if lqq would be able to ignore that— even if he was still hellbent on revenge against qr. Maybe lqq doesn’t recognize mq in fy’s form— his decision to help would come across as so much more sincere like that, I think. Mq isn’t even present but lqq— who is still so jaded by his own quest— still thinks so highly of mq,,,,,,, I think mq would be taken aback by the gesture. Meanwhile lqq knows what it’s like to be wronged and want to set things right— he can empathize.

I’m shaking your hands on the qiurong sentiments— again, I think it’s fun for people to explore ships however they want. I don’t really like it so I don’t really engage with it. They don’t scratch the right type of enemies to lovers tropes that I usually like and that’s okay! I’ll be peddling my lqq content off in the corner while people have fun in their spaces.

I think it’s okay and important to be selective about how you enjoy your media! Not every piece of art or fic was made to be universally enjoyed and that’s okay! Personally I’m with you on focusing on characterization— If I feel like my silly lil guys would not say the words being put in their mouths then usually I put what I’m looking at down and move onto something else.

We’re alike in side character enjoyment too LMAO. Not to analyze it too hard but— for me at least— I think it comes down to how much they have or have not been explored and the intrigue that comes with that possibility. In more deranged words: they’re chewier! It’s like you said— it’s fun to try and figure out how they would behave in unwritten scenarios.

I’m glad you liked my autumn wind piece!!! I’d never drawn sqx before so that was exciting. I’ve been quietly enjoying people’s reactions to it while hiding so many other lqq rarepair ideas in my pockets 🤫😂

[ask-the-party-god]

Ask The Party God - Timeline

hi hi! as i mentioned earlier, i wanted to talk about my specific timeline so you guys are more or less aware of my situation when sending asks! thats me up there! the best doggy girl around ;o

as far as i am aware, theres not much of a difference between mine and... other timelines as far as the game goes! we beat sburb, we arrived to earth-c, we settled down, you know! the usual! i have my tower on a nice island, but its so far away from everything i barely go there, its... lonely!

i have a smaller house in the troll kingdom though! its a bit on the outskirts and like ten minutes away from dave and karkats, but i still crash at theirs or roses or roxys or johns way more often... X) its pretty standard all things considered, but i do have a bit of a basement lab to mess around with some side-projects of mine!

that aside... lets see...

thats john! my lovely ecto-bro! :D hes been a bit down in the dumps for a while so i try to cheer him up and keep him company <3 he lives in the outskirts of the human kingdom bordering with the consort kingdom, in a little mixed village... recently hes started to grow his hair out a bit too! i swear its just laziness so he doesnt have to take care of that messy mane, but i do think itd look cuter longer sooo...

he doesn’t... do much, which is why i have been trying to cheer him up and be around lately! he’s a bit more active at least and talks with the others, but i do wanna encourage him more >:/

5/8/20 edit: thats june egbert, my adorable ecto-sis whom i adore so so so so very much!!! weve been hanging out a bunch since her latest birthday!

shes been doing a lot better! more energetic, more open about the things that worry her... i only wish her the best of the best for the future, and im sure well be having lots of fun together from now on! :D

of course theres dave and karkat!!! they live together in the troll kingdom and have the moooost adorable domestic life i have ever seen, swoooon~ that being said theyre two awkward bottoms that couldnt realize their feelings even if they wrote a heartfelt love letter to each other and read it aloud, soooo its a... work in progress! i have tried nudging things along but thats an even worker in progresser, whoops

they also dont do much other than laze about most of the time, but dave has some creative side-projects with music and art that he shows me from time to time!

rose and kanaya maryam-lalonde!!! two absolutely lovely ladies whom i looove very very much! ;o their place is at the carapace kingdom, but kanaya spends a good deal of time in the brooding caverns as the matriarch of the troll race! i helped them install a transportalizer to speed things up so they have more time for each other, if you catch my drift ;)

about a year ago or so, rose got really sick for a short while, but she recovered and has been her usual lovely self since! since that scare though, they have been considering the idea of expanding their family! they could adopt of course, but they wanna try other stuff first! i occasionally help kanaya at the caverns with ectobiology machinery trying to find a way to properly mix troll and human genes, but its not exactly... easy

those are jane and jasprose! janes technically my mom but ive always seen her as a sort of cousin! we dont chat much but shes not bad! jasproses... well, you know! a wild kitty girl that knows how to have fun, hehehe, i hang out with her far more than my doggy alignment would have you know! ;o

a while back jane seemed pretty serious about running for office, and maybe because rose was in a bad spot or something, but jasprose started to pop up more and more often in public, and specifically messi around with jane? eventually she seemed to just lose interest in politics entirely and, while they havent said anything officially, i heard the cheshire cutie pops over by janes way too often to be just friendly visits ;o

roxy and callie!!! both of them came as non-binary around the same time, probably after talking it out for a while! hehe, rox has got that strider style going, and callie has been wearing their old wig more often in public! roxy and i have been messing around with their old lab equipment trying to give callie a fun surprise, but as it turns out messing around with basic biology with tech made to be used by 13 years old requires a looooot of tinkering... maybe some time?

i love them a bunch! theyre not really together i dont think so? but im pretty sure theyre more than just good friends that live together! im pretty sure callies still experimenting with identity and labels so, i wont pry really!

two cool dudes~ jake and dirk are nice, dirks a bit shy but ive gotten him to open up about robotics and we talk from time to time! jakes pretty much like jane, i pretty much see him as my cousin! we go hiking around from time to time in the weekends im not busy doing other stuff! :B

dirk got really concerned about rose when she had her episode, but dave helped him keep his cool about whatever was going down, and they hang out about once a month or so! also i was never sure whether dirk and jake USED to be dating or are STILL dating or whatever but, hey, much like with rox and callie, im not gonna pry!

tereziiiii :( shes away from earth-c plundering the corpse of paradox space! we barely see her but we keep in contact and send her supplies out into the furthest ring!

we worried for a bit that she was focusing too much on vriska and harming herself being out there, we kind of made it work in the end! some of our other friends are still out there and theres the possibility of finding some weird remnant of a timeline or something, so she keeps watch in case she can guide someone still living or trapped back to safety... and in the meantime she keeps watch for vriska, too, of course- ugh, i sorta just wish she got back already, im sure her being around would also encourage john to be more active! but as long as shes safe...

davepeta!!! the coolest cat around B) ive not... seen them in person since our little encounter near the green sun, but, terezi bumped into them a while back and sent a selfie! i dunno what theyre doing out there, but they mentioned about popping by earth-c eventually, sooooo, weve been holding onto a welcome celebration for a few months now!

and i think thats all? uuuh, if i can think of anything else i will add it, and you guys can ask me anything that wasnt clear or to elaborate on other stuff! hope this gives all of you a better picture of whats been going on in my life! :p

[theabyssalmuses-archived]

20!

[Munday Meme! - Open !]

20. Is there someone you admire on here? 

Oh sure, there are a few people…i wouldn’t say I admire them, but I do like them a whole lot! 

@kiidreamu - MY WIFE and person who convinced me to start this blog in the first place, I wouldn’t have gotten anywhere without them!! They’re so amazing and have even more muses than me and they’re so kind and sweet and i love them so much!! They play ALL their muses so so very well and their headcanons are sooooo well thought out and i just LOVE everything about them!! They’re just 1 billion percent amazing! 

@muniificus - ICARUS is just an amazing friend who plays some really nifty muses, not gonna lie !! They have some muses i don’t really know BUT i like them and overall they’re just GREAT!!! They’ve been going through some rough times but im sure they can get through it!! 

@maljefe / @awanderers - JAZZY is an INCREDIBLE writer FOR REAL. Their muses have some SUPER in-depth worldbuilding and headcanons and descriptions and their relationships WITHIN that world feel SO SO REAL and they’re just INCREDIBLE (I haven’t had a chance to write with them yet but!! it will!! happen!! I KNOW IT!! ) @destructiveglitch - FARIDA WHOAAA HAS an AMAZING MUSE! MWAH MWAH i wanna give Cadillac a BIG KISS right on his beautiful face!! The worldbuilding for his story is SOOOO GOOD and all the other characters related to him are JUST AS GOOD TOO !! OOOOHOHHHH H

@dekirukoto - ALEX  !!! I love Makoto so so much!!! i don’t really know much about his source (danganronpa) BUT the fact that you’ve taken him ABOVE AND BEYOND into different verses is !! GOOD!! and the ANALYSIS!! HIS S PSYCHOLOGY!! HIS DREAM!! OIUGUGHHH!! PROTAG POWERS ACTIVATE! 

@mcphistcples HHEEHEEE WHERE DO I BEEEGGIINN…you first roleplayed with me on another blog of mine and now the wheels of fate have brought us together again, old friend. aNYWYAS your charactertisations are so gOOD and your in depth METAS ARE NEXT LEVEL and thus you can consider me apart of your eternal legion of Reinhard lovers 

@asagamifujiino - metal,,,metal my man. one of the first people i ever really interacted with ,yo… YOU are a REAL G MY MAN!! even if we don’t rp much that’s probably my fault but I APPRECIATE YOU BRO!!!! And i love all your muses, not just fujinon!!! 

@chaldeamxster GAN-SAAAAAAN !!!! WHAT CAN I EVEN SAY!!! you’re a GREAT friend YOO!! i love our ships and i love Shizuka AND your other muses a whole lot!! AAAA !!!!! 

@hearthhearted  YO YO YO  YOU have some *SWEET* muses yessir!!! I love your headcanons a fuck ton you know!! Playing Lalter and Santa alter is so MWAH!!! I love!!!! Your interactions are always so nice to see on my dash!! keep it up!! 

@jaakunxkaze  I see. so this is the way of the fuuma. yes, it’s true, i adore Kotarou a whole lot- but is that really okay? ADASD YEAH I LOVE FUUMA SOOO MUCH!! his mentality toward his clan and his lingering feelings and the way he follows his ninja code AAAASDDFSADS I LOVE HEEEEEEEE (and so does Ibaraki she will care for himSFDSFSD)

@sanzenxsekai  SUKU! I LOVE YOUR NOBUNAGA SO MUCH!!! You play her in such a PERFECT balance of ‘Comical’ and ‘Actually threatening demon king’ ITS FANTASTICC !!! AAAAAAAA !! ! ITS SO SO GOOD AND YOu’RE JUST SO UNIQUE- NO ONE COULD EVER HOPE TO MATCH YOUR NOBU! YOU’RE IRREPLACABLE! 

@nexarerum SPOOKSSSS we also haven’t interacted as much as i’d like (my bad, but new year new me i can do it!) BUT AAA I LOVE ALL YOUR MUSES SO MUCHH!! they feel SO REALLL you know??? of course, Gabs is the lovable sunshine centerppoint, but the others like Samil and Azar are SO COMPELLING AS WELL!!! WOOUGHHHHH!!! 

@crionsbelt DEVIL DEVIL DEVIL We’ve not really known each othe that long, thinking on it, bUT I LOVE ALL THE MUSES YOu’vE PLAYED THAT IVE ,,SEEN!! Your playing Super Orion is FANTASTIC SO FAR AND IM HYPED AS SHIT TO SEE MORE!! you’ve had some rough times but here’s hoping for a good 2020! WOOOO!!! 

@twinfoxtails  AMBER we haven’t interacted much either (my bad. 2020 is here i WILL get on that) BUT i love Eri sso much…he’s such a lovable boy and i love seeing how he develops…PLUS you’re just a great friend overall!!! 

@intrinsicmirage we’ve not spoken / interacted a whoole lot but I ADORE ALL YOUR OCS SO MUCH ASFSDFSD YOU’RE GREAt!!! i can’t wait to do more stuff with you yeah yeah yeah!!! 

@mysticallities a totally sweet friend with a WILD set of muses - many of which i’ve never heard of, but they’re totally COOOOOOL !!! Hang in there, Silk! 

@fantasyacrossworlds AWOOOOOO i LOEV ALL YOUR CHARACTERS AFDSFSDF their stories are so NEAT!!! I can’t wait to see what else you do, too, you know! you’re amazing!!! 

@fatefulones dr~ac~ooooo!!! you have a sweet collection of muses across all your blogs, and i love all of them! alot!!! your ocs are super duper wooper neat, and have some interesting concepts at play !! 

@squadronofnerds Proot you’re here cause you’re awesome- A GREAT friend with some absolutely SPECTACULAR OCs, even if you don’t write on tumblr much, STILL!! Thank you for supporting my grade-A bullshit! YEAHH! 

THERE ARE MORE PEOPLE BUT THIS POST IS GETTING TOO LONG GOMENASAIIII EVERYONE 

BUT IF YOU’RE READING THISS I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUU !!!!

[tumblunni]

OH FUCK I THINK I FINALLY CRACKED THE CODE OF WHY I ALWAYS LIKE THE VILLAINS BETTER

Like man it always makes me so confused cos i mean im a soft AF person and i always end up having sympathetic redemption headcanons for them so its not like i like VILLAINY ITSELF but what else do all these characters have in common?

Thats it. Thats it, ursula helped me crack it.

I just WANT THOSE TRAITS ON THE HEROES

I really want a nice confident sassy funny chubby trans auntie who promotes body positivity to our young hero and always gets to say the coolest lines and get the best moments and BE LOVED FOR WHO SHE IS

And like usually whenever you get anywhere close to seeing those "villain traits" on a hero they like.. Remove all the good parts. If you have a supportive hero aunt she's always boring and generically supportive instead, and has to look like the most stereotypical boring mess ans have a super small plot role and uuuugh thats IF SHES EVEN THERE i mean seriously aunties and grandmas are weirdly less represented as mentors than grandpas who are already REALLY HARD TO FIND and again OFTEN GENERIC AND UNFUN WHENEVER THEY GET TO APPEAR

And how damn often are we allowed to have a chubby gay aunt!! WHERE IS MY CHUBBY GAY AUNT!! ive met SO MANY chubby gay aunts in real life like 90% of all my psychologists have been either that or like.. The exact same but a straight lgbt ally instead. Sassy plus size aunties are THE BACKBONE OF OUR SOCIETY DAMMIT! I've had so much help thanks to sassy gay aunts!! And like even just looking at any damn crowd scene in a normal city centre youre gonna see so many chubby aunts and long nosed uncles and all those sorts of bullshit "ugly people" that mass media pretends are ugly and relegates to One Minor Role In The Entire Cast despite them being infinately more common than supermodels and NOT UGLY AT ALL GEEZ IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH

I cant believe im a fuckin disney villain fan cos of body positivity

Tfw u suck so bad at making hateable people that the fandom universally hugs all your villains and ignores your boring protagonists like fuckin TAKE THAT DIDNEY

God i wanna hug hades sooo bad he just needs a friend aaaaaa

And i mean its not just disney, every damn time ive obsessed over a villain its been because they have some trait thats supposed to be "bad" but its actually good and we dont get to see it on the heroes

Like my thing with science villains in particular is that when i first played ff7 i really liked the idea of an evil minion who's a bad sidekick not just because he's "dumb" or "bumbling" but because he's actually not interested in any of the evil stuff and he works against his own boss and is like.. Friendly to the heroes, i have no particular grudge against you and i wont stop you if im off duty and all. I liked the Turks for the same reason but in the origibal ff7 translation they were kind of stoic and serious and i didnt really become as much of a fan of them til i saw them being more goofy and comic relief in some optional sidequests and then their movie adaptation. But hojo was always being all "lol my boss's plan is so stupid amirite" and had that very memorable scene where he's just sunbathing and tells you everything you need to know to get to the next thing to ruin his boss's plan cos i mean fuck it who even cares im just here to soak up some sun while fully dressed in a turtleneck and labcoat. It sucked so much that he was such a reprehensible bastard with creepy sexual assault vibes and murder and child abuse and experimenting on people and basically just NOT A LOVEABLE VILLAIN but his CONCEPT held so much potential to be filled by a sympathetic character instead...

So yeah then cos of him i kept being obsessed with finding SOME CHARACTER SOMEWHERE that actually lived up tp that potential, and thats why i was instantly interested in charon from pokemon and totally on edge waiting for the slightest chance for him to become That Perfect Sass Gramps Of Legend. And then he was indeed sassy!! And had so little screenyime that there was potential for interpretation of him as potentially redeemable cos i mean the game never said he wasnt, the game barely said anything about him at all, lol. And he was so old and small and frail looking and i just wanted to protect him!! And then that one wifi event that actually hinted at synpatheticness!! Aaaa its a recipe for a Forever Fave~

And i guess maybe it all started with my grandma being awesome and me really missing her? Cos i had shitty abusive parents and she was my ONLY good family member who showed me what love was like. And she was also basically a supervillain. Like every damn supervillain trait except being evil! She was bombastic and confident and sassy and mischievious and loud and passionate about stuff and always had something funny to say and never gave up no matter how many times she failed. And she also used all that great power for the forces of good!

So yeh thats why i love sassy good guys and i hate that often even when a sassy villain gets redeemed they seem to lose all their edge and become more generic now theyre a good guy. Or they get totally sidelined with no screentime anymore, or they ONLY get to be comic relief and dont get the full and complex redemption they deserve. Or just a lot of bads!! Its never the simplest answer of just fuckin.. Keep the character the character. Thats kinda why i didnt feel too much for the maleficent movie even though the concept itself sounded like everything i ever wanted. The character in that movie is a very different person to origibal maleficent, she's more just a stoic tsundere mumsy figure than a hammy badass iconicness. Still a nice villain redemption but it felt like it would have been better as an original story instead of an attempted maleficent. Also i wish they handled it better with the whole "true love's kiss could be from your mum instead" thing cos i get sooooo grossed out whenever i see people shipping movie maleficent and aurora! Like yes sleeping beauty with lesbians would be great but not when one of them is old enough to be her mum and raised her like a mum and changed her goddamn diapers! Also why did they have to ruin the three good fairies just to make maleficent have the mum opportunity? Like just remove them from the story if you wanted maleficent to raise the kid instead. No need to rewrite them into incompetant assholes when they were everyone's fave part of the original! Dont sacrifice the rare and elusive Good Sassy Gay Aunts!! THEYRE LIKE THE ONLY ONES IN DIDNEY!!! (Incodentally merlin is the equivelant of this to hades as the fairies are to ursula)

Also also villains tend to have ACTUAL FLAWS in stories that have a more boring bland protagonist. I wanna see the story behind charon's neuroses and how he struggles with overcoming his temptation to be bad because of greed but ultimately manages to conquer his own negative side because power of friendship and such. Thats a great character arc that provides so much more than he does as a villain where they just wasted him entirely :(

SO BASICALLY IN SUMMARY

* villains are often more complex and well developed characters with flaws while the same wroter might make shitty heroes due to the illogical fear that nobody would root for them if they werent 100% perfect and successful at everything ever

* villains are also often made as negative stereotypes of minorities and other rarely seen traits, which means its easy to reach out to them and reclaim them as a more positive version when theres literally no other options for you to cling to

* the quite common accidental sympathy factor where a villain will seem to be hated more than they deserve for their actions, ir unjustly punished so much that they feel like an underdog, since the writer assumes you'll think theyre "more evil" for being a stereotype and if you dont agree that this thing is bad then it seems like they have way less sins than the story claims they do

* also sass. Sass is good.

But basically the whole root of it is that its stupid and cruel and doesnt goddamn work when you make villains bigoted stereotypes. It just makes me love them! The only person i hate when i see a stereotypical villain is the writer who thought that was a good idea, lol. Just imagine that meme of the samurai holding the cat but its me holding all disney villains!

Also even if a villain isnt outright intentionally meant to be "this minority is bad", it can still make me symoathetic to them if theyre still something thats rare amoung the hero side in the same series. Like charon being the "most unredeemable" villain despite being the most harmless and funny and his plan being so much less world destroying than cyrus, and also he's the only grandpa villain in like.. The whole of all. And he's drawn very much in that way thays supposed to be "ugly" i.e normal grandpa, vs that weird sort of younger than he looks grandpa that hero ones tend to be because blablabla beauty ewuals goodness anti body positivity whatever. Tho actually sinnoh was good with that, they had the best grandpa professor in my opinion cos he got to be sassy too! Rowan always reminds me of auron from ff10. Sinnoh was a good game where i liked a lot of both the heroes and villains even if i still had more villain faves cos i mean pokemon is always biased towards that for me since every game has a voiceless perosnalityless main character and often theyre the one doing most of the heroing with the supporting hero characters having surprisingly little proper screen time. Thats a big part of why i loved hau gladion and lillie in sun and moon! They felt more like a real friend group than any other ones before.

ANYWAY now im just going offtopic into more "i love lots of stuff about every pokemon game" so ill stop typing now

But just basically VILLAINS ARE GOOD COS THEYRE GOOD CHARACTERS and if those stories gavethe same character a good guy role then id still love them just as much, if not more. I dont specifically like villainy, its just that my definition of a good character is often considered a bad character by lazy writers, apparantly?

Also WHERE IS MY SUPPORTIVE GOOD GRAMPS CHARON GAME AND GAY AUNTIE URSULA GIVES YOU FASHION TIPS SMARTPHONE MMO

[petrosapian]

Monster in law

kljkldjlakdjlaskd ive seen that is sooooo bad like jlo has no appeal to me. i wanna see second act as some point but i have never liked a single jlo movie i could never even finish maid in manhattan and the only reason i kind of enjoyed wedding planner is matthw maacononoheyhey evokes strong feelings in me which i cannot tell if theyre positive or negative. someone told me thats his southern charm and i wanted to snap a neck

anyways i dont consider it a romcom bc the central story doesnt have anything to do with the romance tbh unless u were rooting for fonda/lopez. has fonda ever genuinely played gay? bc she should. anyways jlo is always lackluster and i dont like stories that are a conflict between old person young person like who are you? tina fey

[smireyac]

fuck this year man u dont even get cute emojis in the title this time

so lemme just start by saying fuck 2020 

now that we’re on the same page, lets get into it

so i dont have to explain all the reasons why this year sucked bc u just need to google 2020 and there will be a million reasons why it was TOTAL FUCKING GARBAGE...... usually when so many people collectively say a year sucked ass, i can be like “oh it wasnt *all* bad for me, personally” haha not this year!!! 

its super fucking depressing to look at how hopeful and positive i was about 2020 a year ago..... ofc there was no way for me to have known it would all go to shit but i still really appreciate the tone i had set... reading over the previous reflections and seeing how harsh and negative i was @ myself made the softness of last years post super refreshing.... 

now i said i dont *have* to explain all the ways 2020 was shitty, but i am gonna explain the biggest reason this year was shitty for me, personally..... it might seem really small in comparison to the ways 2020 was shitty as a whole on like a global scale? but really the biggest reason 2020 sucked ass was i didnt get to really hang out with any of my friends in real life for 9 out of the 12 months of the year.... and really it was like the first week of march that shit hit the fan so like really it was only 2 months that we got to see each other....... if u rmbr p much every previous retrospective post ive made, there was a big emphasis on friends..... ive come to realize that im actually a very *extra*verted person??? despite my overall shyness and homebody attitude, i would always choose to hang out with people over being alone so stay-at-home orders FUCKING SUCKED??? when we all thought it would be over in a couple weeks, maybe a month it was fine?? hey its a good time to draw or catch up on that reading and/or writing i said i was gonna do maybe even start learning to drive?? it’ll be no big deal THEN it wasn’t over in a month and it wasnt gonna BE over anytime soon and no one important was doing anything about it and its an election year and black lives have always mattered and yet everything is so uncertain and

[inhale]

[exhale]

this year was..... a lot...... too much in fact

in 2018, i had said that i watched vox’s video on the year in 5 mins and cried... if i watched this year in five minutes, i dont think i would be able to breathe...... 

SO instead of making myself CRY..... lets try to think about any GOOD things that happened and think about what we can do to make 2021 good for ourselves:

GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPENED:

-i *didn’t* lose my job!! sad that so many others cannot say the same but im trying to make myself feel *better* not WORSE so i got to keep my job and i actually work more hours than before so!!

-i actually *did* learn to drive this year!!!! and im pretty good at it??? for someone that just started this year anyway?? i probably *would* have my DRIVER’S LICENSE right now if it weren’t for a surge in cases in a certain STATE that i happen to live in......... but w/e its fine i get more time to practice and im ~~**DEFINITELY**~~ going pass my test and get my license ~whenever it is that i can reschedule my dmv appt~

lmfao its so funny that last year, i was absolutely *dreading* learning to drive but i so fucking get why everyone was like ‘you need to learn how to drive’ i legit love it so much???? ive always been a car person but that was like purely for the aesthetic but now that i can drive im just....... WOOOW this really is what freedom feels like.... like ik that public transportation is amazing and i will always champion it but nothing beats being purely in control of your destination.... i also wanted to buy myself a car for my birthday even tho i couldnt really drive yet but then sien had to fix smthg on her car and it was EXPENSIVE AF and my mom was like “u dont need to buy a car yet” so i put the brakes [haha] on that... but soon... once i get my license,,, then i will have u my love................. so with that being “my most serious goal of 2020″ im glad i did it

-i was one of lucky ones and got unemployment when i couldn’t work so i have a lot of money saved in the bank??? pls no one steal my identity i wanna use that money to buy myself a car and/or for when we move out 🤞🤞 we’ll just have to wait and seeeeee....................

-i had mentioned playing dnd last year too and thats been going STRONG as hell thank goodness....... we couldnt keep playing in person but when we moved it to online, not only did we actually get to hang out a lot more, we made more friends??? introduced new people to the group?? its so good and in fact probably the only thing that kept me even a little bit sane this year...... 

-this is more of an honorable mention than an accomplishment but im this 🤏close to catching up with critical role and thats partially thanks to the pandemic lmao sooooo ??? 

aaaaaaand thats p much it lol i didnt really accomplish any of my other goals bc reasons................. but!!! as cliche as it sounds, with a light at the end of the tunnel, im confident that i can turn that all around this year.... so if 2016 was the year of change, 2017 was the year of getting used to shit, 2018 was the year of getting *too* used to shit and 2019 ended up being the year of friends, 2020 was the year of absolute shit and it doesn’t fucking count....... i learned a lot this year, biggest lesson of all is that life is short and if i were to have died at any point last year, what the fuck would i have to show for it??? so usually i end up giving a theme or name to a year after its done but this time im determined to make 2021 into what i want it to be SO i am declaring this year, the year of our lord 2021, the year of new experiences!!!! what the fuck does that mean you ask? well ill tell you!!! im gonna try new things this year!! make a very pointed effort to do things outside my comfort zone?? and for my goals this year, im going back to my old way of making a huge list of stuff u wanna do and seeing how much i can actuallly accomplish!! now i said theres a light but we really dont know when all this shit will end and life will go “bAcK tO nOrMaL” so whos to say ill get to accomplish any of it? at the same time, there are plenty of stuff on the list that i can do within the pandemic set parameters so!! lets see this list!!

2021 GOALS:

[check boxes bc there is no plain box emoji lmao]

☑️ read new books!! i’ll keep last years goal bc i didnt meet it and i have good reads now which tells me i just need to read 1.5 books a month to reach that goal!! huzzah!

☑️ watch new shows and new movies b4 u end up watching shit you’ve already seen a million times... i bought an old planner for 2020 instead of 2021 by accident but i hope it will help keep track of the movies/shows along with the books too!

☑️ listen to new music!! this years spotify wrapped was garbo it only had like 3 albums and a bunch of other shit i always listen to so i gotta fix that lmfao

☑️ write new stories!! i am comforted by the shit ive been writing for the past like 7 years but if my screenplay class taught me anything its that there are a lot of stories to tell and i got so many ideas floating around in this noggin!! instead of an arbitrary word count, why dont i say write idk 3 new stories, start to finish, in whatever medium idc screenplay, short story, comic, twine WHATEVER!! do it!

☑️ eat new food!! lmao this one seems the most silly to me but ive never had indian food, ive never had [not really anyway] korean food, i want to find new restaurants and eat new food!!! yum!

☑️ go on a road trip!!

☑️ visit some place ive never been before!!

☑️ go on a hike??

☑️ go to mexico again

☑️ ride a scary rollercoaster you previously wouldnt have

☑️ go to a club

☑️ get silly drunk fr 

☑️ FUCK IT go on dates!! self date friend dates sister date cousin dates R- Romantic... dates ??? FUCK IT!!! YEAH!! DATE ALL UP IN THIS BITCH!!

☑️ learn to use blender

☑️ animate something 

☑️ make a big painting

☑️ cosplay ???? AHH

☑️ learn to roller skate lmao u bought the skates and were so excited for them!! 

☑️ go somewhere SUPER DARK and go see some real stars!!!! 

☑️ and to top it all off, throw the airbnb house party that we’ve been talking about for MONTHS lmao 

hmmmm,, i think thats a good enough list for now ?? another thing i wanted to accomplish.... that im scared to speak into existence bc then i cant back out of doing it...........and it doesnt align with the whole “new” spirit of 2021 but.......... i want to like start making apartments for rent????? like i want to have something of it to show by, if not the 8th anniversary then by the end of the year HHUFF THERE I SAID IT......... no turning back now.......... 

alright its almost midnight on.... whats this? its already jan. 1st??? lmao yeah fuck it i didnt keep up with anything i normally did this year who cares i made up the rules i can break them too lol  

so yeah 

we’ll see what this year brings us,,,,

hoo boy

[sequoiann]

❧ h.js | assassin!au

pairing; seventeen joshua x reader

genre; bulletpointed, assassin!joshua, fluff, doctor!reader, mentions of blood

collab with; @kpop–fics

tags; @lunarjihoon

notes; my asssassin!aus are getting waaay to fluffy for a supposedly dark au i’m sorry everyone AHAHA but hope you like this one!!

joshua assassin!au

did you think you were gunna get some dark shua

SIKE

jkjk

he’s the medic ??? of the team 

idk what you wanna call it but

he basically cures everyone on the team

and prevents them from dying lol

no i mean seriously joshua is seen as the florence nightingale of the group 

but ok he does go on the missions too

since he has the most advanced knowledge on medicine and stuff like that ,, he can make doses that can kill their targets

basically poison doses lol

andddd he’s always busy 

like 

he doesn’t have time to rest 

AT ALL 

because

every day 

like every single day

after every single mission

there would be at least one wounded member on the team 

“smh guys can’t you be more careful” 

“YOU TRY IT THEN” 

“...nvm” 

he usually does the behind-the-scenes work and not the actions aha

& he usually gets really worried when someone gets injured bc he knows how bad it could get

it could go from 

“seungkwan got a scratch on his cheek”

to

“SEOKMIN HAS HIS INTESTINES RIPPED OUT JOSHUA SAVE HIM” 

like what the fuck guys

well 

no matter how busy it could get 

it was something he did like doing 

he liked the feeling of being important to the team 

and 

the fact that he could make the members feel better

but surprise surpriseeeeee

he actually didn’t plan on becoming part of an assassin team 

all he wanted was to become a doctor 

but 

since his group of friends pulled him into this 

,,,

why not 

they were all childhood friends and had promised to stay as a group when they were still really young

and their friendship had remained strong throughout the years

so sure

they need someone to look after them anyways

it was kinda funny to imagine that they would be nowhere without him 

seokmin would probably have his kidney hanging out of his body or something

but today, it was joshua himself who got injured 

they were on a mission to kill the president of a corrupted company

so all of them went,, since the building was really big

and jeonghan stayed in the car as standby

jihoon too,,, he was just monitoring them aft hacking the building’s cctvs

soo for those in the building

they were moving tgt, although pretty spaced out

joshua lagged behind the group bc he was on the lookout

but suddenly someone just grabs him from the back and joshua managed to kick him off

but that man came back and just flung him

shua was practically thrown against a window + shelf while trying to attack back

and there was a huGEE gash running up his upper arm

resulting in his arm bleeding a waterfall of blood

apparently the company had higher security than they had predicted so

abort mission for real

when they were in the car + when they got back, joshua couldn’t do anything bc ,,,

i mean ,,,

how tf is he supposed to treat himself

soonyoung was just pressing a thick cloth onto the wound but it wasn’t of much help really

everyone else would be able to help with minor wounds but this one was asdfgkl

,,, joshua wouldn’t be able to help even if it happened on another member

it was that bad

and ok jeonghan knew how to stitch wounds up 

but they don’t have anesthetic

so he couldn’t stitch the wound up bc joshua would probably die from the pain first before dying from blood loss

and joshua was just getting paler and paler by the minute

this wound just couldn’t get treated by any of them

“i think we need to get you to a hospital”

cue joshua pouting bc he never really liked hospitals

the doctors never really cared

shua had a few hospital visits when he was younger

none of them being good experiences

like omg the doctors act as if everything can be cured by ice packs

got a bruise? have an ice pack. 

have a stomach ache? have an ice pack. 

broke your neck? have a fucking ice pack.

like do i look like a moron to you

ok back to the story

seungcheol was kinda hesitant at first but 

1. he knew their assassin group was pretty private so no one would recognize them 

2. shua was gonna die and

3. shua is screaming

ok not really screaming screaming

but making weird grunting noises

of pain

whatever 

he needed to live

the team needed him

so 

an hour later 

joshua and everyone else were in front of the local hospital 

andddd you worked there as a pretty experienced doctor

so! 

suddenly

that night

a horde of men just run into the hospital like a fucking tsunami was chasing them lmao

“is there a doctor available?!!!” 

you were the closest to them and you didn’t even have to ask who’s injured

bc this,,, brown-haired guy,,,, in the middle of all of them,,, being held up by 2 guys,,, was literally red

like i mean everything was red

except for his face which was ghostly !!! white !!!

but his clothes were soaked in his own blood and his flesh on his arm was cut open and it was so deep and just

omg it was really really gory

you were pretty shook

“did you guys murder someone or something??”

everyone just gave each other awkward glances 

like um techincally yes we did

you quickly led them to a room and did all the procedures

aka stitching of the wound

but you didn’t allow the whole group of them to follow you in bc you counted 13 of them in total like nonononono get out all of you

so only seungcheol followed

you stitched up joshua’s wound after injecting him with local anesthetic to numb the area

and seungcheol had to look away bc ew

joshua was still really pale tho like the amount of blood he lost was ,,, a lot ,,,

“i think he’s gonna have to stay here for a day or two,” you told seungcheol

seungcheol just nods and leaves and you try to call him back to sign the papers but he juST LEFT 

you were dumbfounded like okay so you’re just ?? gonna ?? leave your friend here ???

but joshua (you learnt his name from seungcheol while you were stitching up joshua’s wound) was asleep

and reasonably so

he would’ve been really weak and tired, considering how much blood he lost

you couldn’t help but stare at him for a while bc he,,, looked ,,, cute

there was a little frown on his face but he still looked pretty relaxed

and his features and everything were just so perfectly sculpted ajdskjfh

ok no y/n you’re a professional doctor stop it

so you let him sleep in the ward after updating his medical reports

and you were on night shift so you were gonna stay in the hospital through the night

you went on your daily rounds and settled more patients

but when you went to check back on joshua about 4 hours later

mEJIK

pOOf

hE wAs gONe

the hospital bed was empty ,,, with just a few cash notes lying on the sheets

o and a little handwritten note too

which just said “thanks for stitching up my wound & taking care of me”

and the amount of cash beside the note was the exact fee he had to pay

okay maybe a few dollars less but that didn’t really matter

what mattered was that hE wASN’T WELL ENOUGH TO LEAVE YET

the wound would open again if he does any strenuous activity omg

but that worry didn’t last very long bc you had other patients to take care of

you couldn’t keep him on your mind like that

fast forward a few weeks later

joshua’s wound !! has healed !!!

not completely but the stitches are out (yes he did it himself) and the wound’s pretty closed already

but he still wasnt in prefect condition so he was sent on a fairly simple mission

which involved killing someone again

but this target was hospitalized 

so it was an easy task

all joshua needed to do was to insert the poison,,, venom thingy,,,, into that person’s IV

but no 

it didn’t go as well as planned

he realized that the person was staying in the same hospital as he was previously

but he didn’t think much of it bc he was here for only a short while

and his identity wasn’t really recorded soOooO 

he just went into the target’s ward, acting as a visitor, a regular mask covering his nose and mouth

and a casual cap over his head

i mean he looked pretty normal

and the target was soundly sleeping

joshua pulled the tiny vile from his pocket, quietly grabbing the syringe from the nurse’ table at the corner of the room, filling it with the poison and injecting it into the IV

“what are you doing?” 

joshua threw the syringe under the bed and stuffed the empty vile into his butt pocket and turned around

shit 

out of all doctors, it had to be you

you ran over, pushing him aside, ripping the IV out of the patient’s arm

the patient had woken up, obviously alarmed and confused

joshua looked away, afraid of being recognized by both you and his target

he quickly turned and walked-jogged right out of the room

you quickly told the patient to just go back to sleep first and ran after joshua

but by the time you got out, you couldn’t see him anywhere 

so you just ran down the hallway, pulling out your phone and calling the hospital’s security.

“hello? someone just entered the---”

you didn’t finish your sentence

the door of the storeroom on your right opened and someone grabbed you, placing a hand over your mouth and pulling you in

your phone was snatched out of your hand and that person switched your phone off

the door got locked but the hand was removed from your mouth

you were about to scream but when you saw the perpetrator’s face ;;; 

“joshua....?” 

you recognized him almost immediately 

he was one of the patients you wouldn’t forget easily

besides, he just came in a few weeks ago

joshua smiles a little when you remembered him

“hey.”

“what the hell? why were you in the patient’s room? what did you put into the IV?” 

your voice was getting louder and louder, causing him to widen his eyes & place his hand over your mouth again

he shushes you

“stop speaking so loud!” 

you stare at him like ??? i’m speaking loudly?? you’re the one who just tried to kill my patient???

joshua couldn’t reveal anything so he just ,,

“that guy isn’t good.” 

you were so pissed like did i ask that ????

joshua just changes the topic suddenly like nothing happened 

and he thanked you for the other time

“i know i haven’t thanked you face to face yet, but thank you. it’s a lot better now.” 

you looked at his arm where the wound was, but it was covered by his sleeve so

nvm 

he smiled at you again and you wanted to scream at him like

stop !!! smiling at me !!!!!

he was so cute you really couldn’t take it 

and so you just snatched your phone from him and left the storeroom 

but not before joshua makes sure you “don’t tell anyone about anything” and “pretend he was never here”

like ok i totally can do that 

he honestly didn’t seem like a bad guy

he seemed to hv good reasons

but no your morals got to you

you had to report him

he nearly killed someone

but before going to the security, you went back to your patient’s room to check if he was fine

but the moment you stepped in

you got fuckign strangled

by your patient

he was shouting something like “are you from their team?! did you just try to kill me?!” 

you were just helplessly clawing at his hands while your lungs contracted

you panicked

but suddenly the pressure on your neck disappears and you just crUmble to the floor

joshua had kicked him in the face and he was sprawled on the floor now

joshua grabs another syringe that was from his jacket pocket and just stabbed it into the man’s neck 

and the man just went unconscious

you were still,,, on the floor,,, spluttering and wheezing

joshua rushed over to you 

“are you okay?” 

he pats you a bit, and he suddenly just reaches around your neck gently, his thumb caressing your sore skin

when you could finally breathe again, you were just

“what was that? did you kill him?” 

joshua shook his head.

“it was just a heavy dose of general anesthetic.” 

that was joshua’s back-up.

you heaved a sigh of relief ;;;  joshua would’ve gotten into huge trouble if the man died 

you got really suspicious of joshua bc of what the man had said to you so you started ,,, cautiously ,,,, questioning joshua

and joshua told you. bc he trusted that you wouldn’t do anything.

and you didn’t !!! bc he just saved your life ,,, he was obviously a good guy

everything he said made sense too sooo okay

so you became a new “partner” of his team

you always helped the members treat their wounds and everything whenever they got injured

it was fun

and joshua liked to make jokes about how “getting injured isn’t bad now, i get to see you” 

:”))))) 

[kpop--fics]

Assassin!Joshua

Collab with @theliqht <3

---

joshua assassin!au

did you think you were gunna get some dark shua

SIKE

jkjk

he’s the medic ??? of the team

idk what you wanna call it but

he basically cures everyone on the team

and prevents them from dying lol

no i mean seriously joshua is seen as the florence nightingale of the group

but ok he does go on the missions too

since he has the most advanced knowledge on medicine and stuff like that ,, he can make doses that can kill their targets

basically poison doses lol

andddd he’s always busy

like

he doesn’t have time to rest

AT ALL

because

every day

like every single day

after every single mission

there would be at least one wounded member on the team

“smh guys can’t you be more careful”

“YOU TRY IT THEN”

“...nvm”

he usually does the behind-the-scenes work and not the actions aha

& he usually gets really worried when someone gets injured bc he knows how bad it could get

it could go from

“seungkwan got a scratch on his cheek”

to

“SEOKMIN HAS HIS INTESTINES RIPPED OUT JOSHUA SAVE HIM”

like what the fuck guys

well

no matter how busy it could get

it was something he did like doing

he liked the feeling of being important to the team

and

the fact that he could make the members feel better

but surprise surpriseeeeee

he actually didn’t plan on becoming part of an assassin team

all he wanted was to become a doctor

but

since his group of friends pulled him into this

,,,

why not

they were all childhood friends and had promised to stay as a group when they were still really young

and their friendship had remained strong throughout the years

so sure

they need someone to look after them anyways

it was kinda funny to imagine that they would be nowhere without him

seokmin would probably have his kidney hanging out of his body or something

but today, it was joshua himself who got injured

they were on a mission to kill the president of a corrupted company

so all of them went,, since the building was really big

and jeonghan stayed in the car as standby

jihoon too,,, he was just monitoring them aft hacking the building’s cctvs

soo for those in the building

they were moving tgt, although pretty spaced out

joshua lagged behind the group bc he was on the lookout

but suddenly someone just grabs him from the back and joshua managed to kick him off

but that man came back and just flung him

shua was practically thrown against a window + shelf while trying to attack back

and there was a huGEE gash running up his upper arm

resulting in his arm bleeding a waterfall of blood

apparently the company had higher security than they had predicted so

abort mission for real

when they were in the car + when they got back, joshua couldn’t do anything bc ,,,

i mean ,,,

how tf is he supposed to treat himself

soonyoung was just pressing a thick cloth onto the wound but it wasn’t of much help really

everyone else would be able to help with minor wounds but this one was asdfgkl

,,, joshua wouldn’t be able to help even if it happened on another member

it was that bad

and ok jeonghan knew how to stitch wounds up

but they don’t have anesthetic

so he couldn’t stitch the wound up bc joshua would probably die from the pain first before dying from blood loss

and joshua was just getting paler and paler by the minute

this wound just couldn’t get treated by any of them

“i think we need to get you to a hospital”

cue joshua pouting bc he never really liked hospitals

the doctors never really cared

shua had a few hospital visits when he was younger

none of them being good experiences

like omg the doctors act as if everything can be cured by ice packs

got a bruise? have an ice pack.

have a stomach ache? have an ice pack.

broke your neck? have a fucking ice pack.

like do i look like a moron to you

ok back to the story

seungcheol was kinda hesitant at first but

1. he knew their assassin group was pretty private so no one would recognize them

2. shua was gonna die and

3. shua is screaming

ok not really screaming screaming

but making weird grunting noises

of pain

whatever

he needed to live

the team needed him

so

an hour later

joshua and everyone else were in front of the local hospital

andddd you worked there as a pretty experienced doctor

so!

suddenly

that night

a horde of men just run into the hospital like a fucking tsunami was chasing them lmao

“is there a doctor available?!!!”

you were the closest to them and you didn’t even have to ask who’s injured

bc this,,, brown-haired guy,,,, in the middle of all of them,,, being held up by 2 guys,,, was literally red

like i mean everything was red

except for his face which was ghostly !!! white !!!

but his clothes were soaked in his own blood and his flesh on his arm was cut open and it was so deep and just

omg it was really really gory

you were pretty shook

“did you guys murder someone or something??”

everyone just gave each other awkward glances

like um techincally yes we did

you quickly led them to a room and did all the procedures

aka stitching of the wound

but you didn’t allow the whole group of them to follow you in bc you counted 13 of them in total like nonononono get out all of you

so only seungcheol followed

you stitched up joshua’s wound after injecting him with local anesthetic to numb the area

and seungcheol had to look away bc ew

joshua was still really pale tho like the amount of blood he lost was ,,, a lot ,,,

“i think he’s gonna have to stay here for a day or two,” you told seungcheol

seungcheol just nods and leaves and you try to call him back to sign the papers but he juST LEFT

you were dumbfounded like okay so you’re just ?? gonna ?? leave your friend here ???

but joshua (you learnt his name from seungcheol while you were stitching up joshua’s wound) was asleep

and reasonably so

he would’ve been really weak and tired, considering how much blood he lost

you couldn’t help but stare at him for a while bc he,,, looked ,,, cute

there was a little frown on his face but he still looked pretty relaxed

and his features and everything were just so perfectly sculpted ajdskjfh

ok no y/n you’re a professional doctor stop it

so you let him sleep in the ward after updating his medical reports

and you were on night shift so you were gonna stay in the hospital through the night

you went on your daily rounds and settled more patients

but when you went to check back on joshua about 4 hours later

mEJIK

pOOf

hE wAs gONe

the hospital bed was empty ,,, with just a few cash notes lying on the sheets

o and a little handwritten note too

which just said “thanks for stitching up my wound & taking care of me”

and the amount of cash beside the note was the exact fee he had to pay

okay maybe a few dollars less but that didn’t really matter

what mattered was that hE wASN’T WELL ENOUGH TO LEAVE YET

the wound would open again if he does any strenuous activity omg

but that worry didn’t last very long bc you had other patients to take care of

you couldn’t keep him on your mind like that

fast forward a few weeks later

joshua’s wound !! has healed !!!

not completely but the stitches are out (yes he did it himself) and the wound’s pretty closed already

but he still wasnt in prefect condition so he was sent on a fairly simple mission

which involved killing someone again

but this target was hospitalized

so it was an easy task

all joshua needed to do was to insert the poison,,, venom thingy,,,, into that person’s IV

but no

it didn’t go as well as planned

he realized that the person was staying in the same hospital as he was previously

but he didn’t think much of it bc he was here for only a short while

and his identity wasn’t really recorded soOooO

he just went into the target’s ward, acting as a visitor, a regular mask covering his nose and mouth

and a casual cap over his head

i mean he looked pretty normal

and the target was soundly sleeping

joshua pulled the tiny vile from his pocket, quietly grabbing the syringe from the nurse’ table at the corner of the room, filling it with the poison and injecting it into the IV

“what are you doing?”

joshua threw the syringe under the bed and stuffed the empty vile into his butt pocket and turned around

shit

out of all doctors, it had to be you

you ran over, pushing him aside, ripping the IV out of the patient’s arm

the patient had woken up, obviously alarmed and confused

joshua looked away, afraid of being recognized by both you and his target

he quickly turned and walked-jogged right out of the room

you quickly told the patient to just go back to sleep first and ran after joshua

but by the time you got out, you couldn’t see him anywhere

so you just ran down the hallway, pulling out your phone and calling the hospital’s security.

“hello? someone just entered the---”

you didn’t finish your sentence

the door of the storeroom on your right opened and someone grabbed you, placing a hand over your mouth and pulling you in

your phone was snatched out of your hand and that person switched your phone off

the door got locked but the hand was removed from your mouth

you were about to scream but when you saw the perpetrator’s face ;;;

“joshua....?”

you recognized him almost immediately

he was one of the patients you wouldn’t forget easily

besides, he just came in a few weeks ago

joshua smiles a little when you remembered him

“hey.”

“what the hell? why were you in the patient’s room? what did you put into the IV?”

your voice was getting louder and louder, causing him to widen his eyes & place his hand over your mouth again

he shushes you

“stop speaking so loud!”

you stare at him like ??? i’m speaking loudly?? you’re the one who just tried to kill my patient???

joshua couldn’t reveal anything so he just ,,

“that guy isn’t good.”

you were so pissed like did i ask that ????

joshua just changes the topic suddenly like nothing happened

and he thanked you for the other time

“i know i haven’t thanked you face to face yet, but thank you. it’s a lot better now.”

you looked at his arm where the wound was, but it was covered by his sleeve so

nvm

he smiled at you again and you wanted to scream at him like

stop !!! smiling at me !!!!!

he was so cute you really couldn’t take it

and so you just snatched your phone from him and left the storeroom

but not before joshua makes sure you “don’t tell anyone about anything” and “pretend he was never here”

like ok i totally can do that

he honestly didn’t seem like a bad guy

he seemed to hv good reasons

but no your morals got to you

you had to report him

he nearly killed someone

but before going to the security, you went back to your patient’s room to check if he was fine

but the moment you stepped in

you got fuckign strangled

by your patient

he was shouting something like “are you from their team?! did you just try to kill me?!”

you were just helplessly clawing at his hands while your lungs contracted

you panicked

but suddenly the pressure on your neck disappears and you just crUmble to the floor

joshua had kicked him in the face and he was sprawled on the floor now

joshua grabs another syringe that was from his jacket pocket and just stabbed it into the man’s neck

and the man just went unconscious

you were still,,, on the floor,,, spluttering and wheezing

joshua rushed over to you

“are you okay?”

he pats you a bit, and he suddenly just reaches around your neck gently, his thumb caressing your sore skin

when you could finally breathe again, you were just

“what was that? did you kill him?”

joshua shook his head.

“it was just a heavy dose of general anesthetic.”

that was joshua’s back-up.

you heaved a sigh of relief ;;;  joshua would’ve gotten into huge trouble if the man died

you got really suspicious of joshua bc of what the man had said to you so you started ,,, cautiously ,,,, questioning joshua

and joshua told you. bc he trusted that you wouldn’t do anything.

and you didn’t !!! bc he just saved your life ,,, he was obviously a good guy

everything he said made sense too sooo okay

so you became a new “partner” of his team

you always helped the members treat their wounds and everything whenever they got injured

it was fun

and joshua liked to make jokes about how “getting injured isn’t bad now, i get to see you”

:”)))))

>> Masterlist

[winemom92]

#BeautifulinNY 07.14.17

This is purely for me to remember everything that happened during my long ass adventure for monsta x

GOD okay so once Friday finally rolled around and i was actually IN NEW YORK!!!!!! we ( @jminsnose & i) got to the playstation theater before 8am bc they told us to line up then but we werent really even ready so we ran back to our place real fast and did a half ass makeup job (which just ended up melting off our faces anyways but thats besides the point) and got back by 8:30 and the line was almost at the end of the street. so once we waited there it started pouring rain but we were smart and brought an umbrella and bought cheap ass ponchos

this is all pointless honestly SO finally by like 12ish they finally took us around to where the ticket booth is (it was shaded from the rain tho tHANK @ GOD)  for us to get our wristbands (we had p2 so we got the hi touch experience to “meet” them) but we didnt even get the wristbands until like 6.... ok

we barely ate anything this whole damn day either and had to stand ever since 8am because they literally told us we couldnt sit bc it was a “fire violation” or some bs. i really only had two bites of a muffin from starbucks and half a small bag of cheez its and a small bottle of water. dont ever do this its not healthy at ALL. 

but anyways by the time 7:04pm came we finally started lining up to get into the venue and we got split up from our friends we made in line (alee karen and clarissa my little babies i miss them too) but once we got inside we found them off to the right side on the stairs and honestly it was the PERFECT view 

the show started half an hour late because of a “medical emergency” but after all the suffering and not eating/sitting and waiting THE SHOW FINALLY STARTED. 

they were sooooo happy to be in new york. they kept on singing NEW YORKKKKKK and saying they loved us and how we were amazing to them and i just. they really loved new york. we loved them back. it was so magical.

and i swear to god WONHO knew he was my bias because

i have never

in my life

had the kind of experiences i had with him with any other singer/band member whatsoever

he ket messing around with me on PURPOSE knowing he could get a reaction out of me..... i...... dont know how i even survived any of the concert honestly. i had to keep crouching down on the ground to breathe i literally was dying for monsta X. wonho ruined my life forever ill never be the same ever again. he would purposely look at me and either rub his chest, bite his lip, body roll, or he even. HE EVEN. 

i have to mention this. so before fighter (their “last song” before their encore) they were saying how it was the last song and i was waving my finger and shaking my head, wonho literally was just like staring at the ground then he randomly looked up RIGHT AT ME while i was waving my finger and he starts to smile and shake his head the way i was waving my finger back and forth. then i guess i was messing with my hair trying to fix it because wonhO FREAKIN COPIED ME AND DID THE SAME THING TO HIS HAIR then i slapped my hand over my mouth and died AND THEN HE GIVES ME THE BIGGEST SMILE AND LAUGHED SO CUTE AND SO BIG MY HEART HURTS THINKING ABOUT IT. AND I FOUND IT FILMED IN SOMEONES VIDEO. i honestly just want to die. he also killed me during White Love aka one of my top 3 songs of the life. thanks a lot wonho. OH AND FROM ZERO...... I DONT EVEN WANNA TALK ABOUT THAT. I WAS LITERALLT SWEARING THE WHOLE TIME. i kept throwing finger hearts at him and thats when he would tease the hell out of me. i see u wonho.

JOOHEON WAS SO BEAUTIFUL????? like they all are and i  couldnt believe any of them were real. but joo-fucking-heon. am i right. he came out and i was like

WAIT

thats him??? that beautiful man???? 

he done snatched me from shownu i cant even deny it anymore. he crawled up my bias list soooo fast (its funny bc in line people were passing out buttons and i kept getting jooheon... it was a sign) he was SO happy during the whole show, and i cant believe the way he raps, HE EVEN SANG i wanted to throw up everywhere. once he did his duet with kihyun. i was floored. i knew he had my heart after that. he kept saying a few things in english my heartu.

kihyun is such a smol but hes so beautiful too and his voice is even more beautiful in person?? he was so damn happy too the whole concert he kept smiling and being lit as hell. he had these really cute moments with i.m and wonho i wanted to just die right then and there.

SHOWNU MY BIG BALL OF CUTENESS. ive never seen someone that was soft as hell and also a man (besides wonho) during sweetheart he tried throwing candy in our direction but he threw it too high and it hit the speakers/lights above us and it all fell on the ground and he just looks like .... the fuck it was adorable as hell i love him mom. but when he threw a handful again i actually got a piece of chocolate and thANK the lord because i was hungry as hell. he went hard as hell in 24k magic... wow a man.

i.m. was adorable as hell too. his english ;__; i cry every time. he really didnt give us the time of day except for a wave (UNLIKE WONHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but he was just cute as hell and he also goes hard when he raps. WE HEARD MARATHAWN in person i was a changed person.

Minhyuk really is wild irl he was one who kept grabbin his crotch every possible moment he could. hes so tall and thin oh my god you can break him in half but hes also so beautiful??? i dont understand how any of them look the way they do. his little english moments too. i was crying and dying.

since hyungwon wasnt there they kept all his placements in the choreo empty and i was crying bc i missed my turtle son :( we kept chanting his name every moment we could. he was definitely loved and missed by all of us.

SO ONCE THE SHOW FINALLY ACTUALLY ENDS!!!  we get ready for the hi touch and i swear to god. i cant believe. i actually. got to. touch. monsta. x. theyre so adorable as hell. and being so close to them i want to die. and touching their hands. o my god

the order was jooheon, minhyuk, shownu, i.m, wonho, then kihyun.

jooheon was saying thank you to everyone with this big ass smile on his face and cute squinty eyes. NO THANK YOU JOOHEON. im p sure they had them standing on something bc jooheon was like 2x taller than normal i was like THAT SOUNDS FAKE.

minhyuk really smacked everyones hand so hard omg a wild child

shownu was so cute he had a hand on his hip and was just hi fiving everyone i cant believe i touched a mans hand.

i.m i really dont remember well he was just adorable as hell, and tbh my focus was just getting to wonho (im sorry i.m i swear i love you a lot)

WONHOS TURN. so i get to him i hold his hand and do a finger heart with my other hand and im like “youre my favorite i love you” then he does a finger heart back to me and nods his head. BOY U BETTER AFTER EVERYTHING HE PUT ME THROUGH. i didnt wanna let go afterwards but i had to “keep the line moving”

i literally blacked out after wonho and dont even remember looking at or acknowledging kihyun. it was so bad i swear i love you too my smol child.

i really cant believe i got to see them and meet them and FLY ALL THE WAY TO NEW YORK????? just for them, oh my god it was worth it. we literally only had a total of 10 hours of sleep all four days we were there. but it was worth literally dying. i cant wait to see them again and meet them again. they relaly put on the best show ever. i miss thems o much :(

[festivebb4-blog]

Jury Questions and Answers, and Closing Statements:

Jury question from Owen - Why don't the other two people you're sitting next to deserve to win, and why do you deserve it more?

Timmy: Hi Owen! I don’t think Amanda deserves to win because she did not make moves during this game. It was easy for her to get this far because she wasn’t seen as a threat and while that can be seen as a good way to play, I think in this situation I played a better game. I deserve to win over Amanda because I always put in the effort to make moves that would benefit my game even if it risked me being a target. Even when I was a target for some people I was able to use my social game to stay over others. Ali does not deserve to win because I was in control of the moves Ali made. Ali was an amazing ally to have and he is a great friend but the things he did in this game were things that I told him to do. I deserve to win over Ali because I helped him get this far. From a different standpoint, I won more competitions than both of them and made moves out in the open, which some disagreed with, and I was still able to make it this far.

 Amanda: Why do i deserve it more- Do you know the vine thats like "Im a bad bitch you cant kill me" thats me in this game lolol i should have been booted sooooo long ago but i kept weaseling my way through. You Rhone and I got seen as a very known trio and i made sure you guys looked scarier than me and once you left i played the "poor me i have nothing" card and it gained me allies with people who should have been getting me out and obviously it worked because im here :)

Ali: ajkhfdakskjfdas owen making me be mean, I hate. Amanda doesn't deserve to win because while she seems like a lovely person, I don't think was especially committed to this game and I don't think she has done all that much. Her and Rhone would consistently vote together, and I don't think she has been a threat for a long time. Additionally, she has consistently just kind of voted with the same people and been in the minority, just sticking to her friends (which she must have good choice in, since you two are friends). Compared to me, I would try and make connections on all sides of the house, I was in a huge variety of alliance chats, with Dana and Zach, with Timmy and John, with you and Ruthie, with Madison, I was always working to make sure I had connections everywhere, which solidified my spot in the majority for literally every vote. Timmy has played a phenomenal challenge game, he won many many comps. With that said, while he was nominated many times (which potentially stems from his weaker social game), it would be my vote that would save him. We have worked quite closely together, but it was my social game that meant that unlike him I never received an eviction vote and was only a final nominee once . When he made unpopular (and surprising) decisions like in the live night, I would do damage control with people like Zach to ensure people I trusted I could balance between. I didn't need to rely on competitions to get here, I used a strong social game as the foundation to a strategic game which allowed me to make it this far. I deserve your vote Owen because I played hard. I was consistently a swing vote and made some hard strategic decisions (like voting out Dana) to ensure my safety going forwards. You once again were terrifying to play with, but I feel like this time (more than last time) I should have earned your respect and thus your vote.

Jury question from Madison: I have the flu so can you ask them how I've impacted them in the community

Amanda: Madison we've gotten through so much trash over the time ive known you and we're still alive. Like girl we got through hell and so much random ass shit here you're so fun and i love you you'll always be my meme queen

Timmy: Hi Madison! I hope you feel better soon!!! You have impacted me in many ways in the community. You are always someone who I am happy to talk to and I know I can have a good laugh with. There are a lot of people who I only talk to because we are in a game together and that’s just how it works out, but we talk outside of games and I enjoy that. You have added me to some random chats, and while I have still yet to take advantage of jackbox nights, I appreciate that you invited me into that. Also, I would have applied to Alcatraz because you’re hosting it but 4 games is already a lot (even though this one is about to end).

Ali: Madison, you have impacted me in the community in that you've become a friend. I remember in Festive 3 when I had to do that satanic slide puzzle for that veto comp and I was so sad and disappointed in myself and you were being so supportive and great. This sounds so incredibly corny, but from there I knew you were a friend and thats why I play these games, to meet new iconic people. Since then, it's been my pleasure to know you and call you a friend and root for you in VLs for games, and I'm so happy we got to play together too, even though it cut short (still sorry about that!)!

Jury question from Ruthie - What are three reasons you deserve my jury vote over the other two in the final 3?

Timmy: Hi Ruthie! I hope you’re having a great time in Disney!! The first reason is that I made moves that I believe changed the game. These moves were in the weeks that John stayed over Chrissa, when I stayed over John, and during the live double. In the week where John stayed, I made multiple calls that day to keep him safe. I was able to convince Zach and Dana to talk to him since they had no prior relationship with him and did not see the original benefit of keeping him. I see this as a move that changed the game because many sides and alliances were exposed under the surface, especially those surrounding Amanda, Owen, and Rhone and I knew I was still able to trust John, so it was in my best interest to keep him. In the week that I stay over John, I knew I was the target, so I could have easily laid down and accept my fate, but I had to fight. Owen had kept nominating me and therefore he wanted me out, but I was able to convince people to look past the “I need to know what others are doing” mentality and show that they all had that and keep me because I am more beneficial. With that move I was able to get Owen out the next week during the double and if I had not done that then the trio of Amanda, Owen, and Rhone would probably have outlasted all of us. The second reason is that I won competitions when I needed to. I won 3 HoHs and 2 vetos. I was able to save myself with both of those vetos, the more important of the two being at F5 when I knew if I had not won I would have left. With the HoHs, at least the 2nd and 3rd, since the first was in week 1, I was able to get rid of people who would have or were already targeting me, Owen and Zach. I think this is important to note as one of the reasons because collectively between Ali and Amanda they only won 2 competitions. The third reason is that I was on the block at the end of the week 4 times and people still did not get rid of me. I never saw myself as a background player in this game because I was always telling people what I wanted to happen and making the right moves to allow those things to happen and somehow people kept me. I always made sure that there was at least one person who looked more threatening than me. I will say though that the situation was different in the Josh vote because he was inactive so I did not put much effort into that vote since it was obvious that he was leaving. Because of those reasons, I believe that I deserve your jury vote over the other time. Sorry, I know you’re on vacation and this is a lot to read, but have fun with the rest of your trip!!

Ali: Hey Ruthie! I'd say three reasons I deserve your vote are:

1. I have never received a vote to evict this season nor have I been in the minority for a vote (the other two have been at least one of those). Timmy was nominated many times,but it was always my votes saving him 2. I played super hard this season, you were my number one and you saw that we were with Dana and Zach, Owen, Madison and Zach, basically I made sure I had connections everywhere, and I think the other two just stuck with who they were close to only. I was also in an alliance with John and Timmy, so it's clear I was working to find numbers all the time everywhere. 3. Other than our BOTB win (so iconic) I haven't needed to win a comp till F4 to evict the biggest threat in the game (Zach). My social and strategic game got me here,while I think Timmy's game was very comp dependent.

Amanda: Lets be honest i shouldve been right out the door after owen and rhone but im here i might not have won comps but 1- i made deals with people i needed to to stay safe and 2- made sure people liked me enough to not want me to leave

And 3- The Disney Gods want you to vote for me

Jury Question from John: Hi final 3! I love you all dearly first off, and this is going to be a very difficult decision. 1. Write me an essay on why you love me 2. If you could compare your gameplay to an animal, what would it be and why?

Amanda: HI BABYYYYY!! You're my John Coffeycakes and I love you so so much. Your BGC snaps are my faves and you always make me laugh. You're literally one of the most genuine and sweet people I know and you honestly brighten up my day everytime we talk! I cried when you left this game and ive missed you so much. I could get even more mushy but i think you already know how much i love you.

2- A monkey because I keep my babies on my back and take care of them picking all the little bugs from their hair. I also sit around eating a banana while everyone else crashed and burned but now Ali and Timmy are trying to TAKE THE BIGGEST BANANA IVE EVER SEEN AND I WANNA EAT IT IM ABOUT TO GO KING KONG ON THIS SHIT.

Ali: 1. John, I love you because while I knew a fair amount of the players before this season, you were one of the few who I only know very loosely (I'd seen you met up with Cameron so knew you already had great taste in friends!). It's been such a real pleasure to get to know and play with you this season, and to become friends afterwards! You are so sweet and so nice, and you don't take these games even remotely personally. My game highlight was the night when like 10 different game calls happening but our one was really fun because we got the game out of the way pretty quickly and then were just able to have fun! You are truly winning crossroads and can add it to all the other things you've won (i.e. festive and everyone hearts). One of the best things to come out of this game is I can now call you friend! 2. I'd compare my gameplay to an octopus in thats my key strength were all the connections and links I made in the house (like an octopus' tentacles). I voted in the majority every single round, and that came from me using my social connections to ensure what I wanted to happen happened and that my votes counted. Like the little squishy suction cups on an octopus' tentacles I would keep attached to everyone which is why I didnt receive a single eviction vote this entire season! Finally I'm an octopus in that.... well you can't play flash games with squishy tentacles which explains why they weren't my friend.

Timmy: Hi John! I’m going to let you know right now, I suck at essays, so this will be shorter than one and will not have the appropriate structure of an essay (also, I’m still on break for the next 24 hours so the thought of an academic style answer is not in me). But to at least answer your question, you were easily one of my favorite people in this game, both on a game level and on a personal level. The first reason was because you were easy to talk to. I am a very awkward person, especially just talking online just because things could come off in a different way than intended but I didn’t find myself having that issue talking to you. Also, in your intro one of the first things you said was that you like being drunk and my first thought was “relatable, me, same” and I knew you would be someone I could get along with. For a large portion of this game you were my number 1 ally and I knew I could trust you which was always important to me since I could just openly talk to you about what I was thinking which is not easy to do in games. I was always able to freak out to you about different things happening and we were always on the same page with what was going on and what we wanted to do about it. To kind of conclude this brief essay, you are a great person who is funny and was always there when I was freaking out and that’s why I love you. To answer the second question, I would simply say that my gameplay could be compared to a cat. Some people like cats, some don’t, which is kind of what my gameplay was like, some people agreed with my moves while others thought I was stupid at times. Another reason is that a cat can be soft and warm up to people and then at any point switch and be angry and I had my moments with that, sometimes turning my targets very quickly based on what was going on around me. Thanks for the questions. 😊

Zach’s Jury Question: Name some fun facts about me and tell me why u should win thanks

Ali: 

- Zach is the king of geckos - Zach has a great pride tattoo - Zach has played 100 days in Athena because he is iconic - Zach has a concerning effect on how I speak, in that I've started saying "I lav it" and "hort" which I'm definitely subconsciously copying from himI deserve to win, because while I've undersold it, I've had a lot of control over this game. I am the only player who hasn't received a single vote to evict this season (or ever) and I was in the majority for every.single.vote. I would make moves to benefit my game, ensuring that threats were going home, and who would benefit my game. I didn't rely on competition wins, until I absolutely needed to, which was ensuring that you didn't win veto and potentially evict me, and so that I could vote to evict you from the game. You were truly the biggest threat in this game, you had such an underdog story and it wasn't something I felt I could rival, so I needed to see you go. Compared to Timmy, while he has had an on point challenge game and has survived many evictions, my votes would consistently be what saved him and I feel like my social game with my strategy gave me a lot of control. I had connections with everyone, alliances all over the shop, and yet I managed to navigate them and ensure my spot at F3. Amanda is a queen, but hasn't been especially committed to this game and I don't feel like has played in a way that deserves to win? (I love her though)

Amanda: You come from a long line of furbies and ilysm. I should win because i'm cute and everyone loves a female winner :*

Timmy: Hi Zach! Some fun facts about you: You live in Canada, you hate mayo, you’re very good at keeping a snap streak going when I’m really bad at it. I should win this game because I played my hardest at all stages during this game. We had conversations about how people were not using their full potential and only a few people deserve to win in the end and I think I am one of those people (who should win). I actively used my social game to stay each week. Some might argue that it was not good because I kept getting nominated, but most of those times I was only nominated by Owen. I got my way during a lot of hard times. Specifically noting the weeks that Chrissa and John left. During the day of the Chrissa vote I spent a big chunk of the day on calls convincing people to keep John because that was a lot better for my game. I got a lot of information from you and Dana and got you guys to talk to John and vote to keep him. John and I were able to convince Ali because of the relationship we had already built with him. When John left, it sucked because I was up against him and he was my number 1 at that point. I knew I was the target and I could have laid down and accepted that but instead I decided to fight and flip the vote. Most people were telling me that day that they would only vote to keep me if others did, so I had to work hard to let everyone know that that was a majority consensus so just vote to keep me and you will be fine. And I stayed. I won competitions when I needed to and got targets out, specifically in the live double. Owen had nominated me many times at that point and I knew I had to get rid of him, so I had like 12 tabs open to try and win HoH which I did. I’m still sorry that I nominated you but my only plan going into that night was to try and get Owen evicted. Two of the times I was nominated I won veto and was able to save myself; the more important of the two being in F5 when I definitely would have gone home if I had not won. I think I should win because I played the game to the best of my ability and thrived, especially after coming in 2nd the season before. This is really one of the first games where I was not afraid to say what my plans were and who I wanted to go and there was only a handful of times during the game where I did not know what was happening (mainly when Owen played the Spook d’état). I hope this answers your question.

Closing Statements:

Amanda: Hi everybodyyyyyy! I know i'm probably the last choice on all of your lists right now but i'm here and i'm having fun! I aligned with the people i needed to and placed myself in the middle of two alliances which kept me in a safe spot for the first half of this game. When we got to Rhones hoh/ the week after everything went to shit and i had to rethink things. I was stuck between two allinces and people were catching onto Rhone Owen and I being a trio. That got completely exposed and everyone was coming at us so i laid low so the two of them ended up looking like the bigger targets and they got taken out before me. After they left i felt alone as fuck and put myself out to zach and made the deal i needed to move forward. I always made sure i had backup relationships for when one crashed and I managed to weasel myself here. Even if I dont win i beat my placement and had a fun ass time doing it and I love you all <3 #FEMINISM

Ali: Hey Jurors! Thank you for an iconic season, it’s been a pleasure to play again with some of you, or meet some faces I’ve seen floating around various VLs. Thank you also to the hosts for hosting an iconic season, it was a pleasure to be invited back to festive and I’m so glad I’ve done myself justice by playing so much better.

When I played my first game, the main critique I got at FTC was that I made friends with everyone but I did nothing with those bonds. Thus, in this game, my philosophy has been to weaponize my social game ; make these social connections but actually do something with them. Consistently in votes, I would be a swing vote determining who would go home, to the point where I was in the majority for every single vote this season. I would use my connections all across the house with my web of alliances (Dana/Zach, Zach/Ruthie/Madison, Ruthie/Dana/Zach, Ruthie/Owen & John/Timmy) to not only keep myself safe but to ensure who I wanted to see go home went home (indicated by how I was in the majority for literally every single vote this season). Additionally, I would position myself so that it was in everyone’s best interest to keep me in the game, hence why I received no votes to evict this season. Social game is hard to quantify, but me winning MVP, which was voted for by players in the game, showed that my social game was universal and I was on average the most liked/supported player in the game.

Thank you everyone for playing, its been an iconic season and I'm looking forward to the reunion chat.

Timmy:  Hi everyone! Thank you for the questions, I hope I answered them to your satisfaction. If I did not, hopefully I can highlight a few things in this statement. I came into this game thinking I would have a huge target on my back because I got 2nd place last season, and granted I did not do much then, it was my ultimate goal to beat that placement here. I think that through the moves I made and the competitions I won to make those moves, I deserve to win this game. I already explained certain moves in some of the jury questions and I just want to briefly mention them again. In the week Chrissa left, I spent a lot of time messaging people and on calls to make sure that John would stay and was even able to convince people like Zach and Dana, who had no prior working relationship with John, to keep him. I even used my vote replacement on Owen and Ruthie just to make sure that he would stay in case something happened. I thought this was smart because I knew it was a safe backup since I had not talked to either of them about the vote. When I was on the block against John, I felt extremely defeated since Owen had hinted using the veto on me and then he nominated John, who was basically my number 1 at that point. I could have laid down and died in this game, but I made people aware of reasons why they should keep me and used my social game to keep me in a 4-2 vote when people all day were saying “maybe, but it depends on what other people are doing”. Then that next week I was able to get Owen out in the live double and, granted I made a few mistakes that night, I was able to put myself in a good spot heading into the rest of the game because the main person who was targeting me was evicted. I was on the block at the end of the week 4 times during this game and was able to stay each time which says something because there were chances to get rid of me, but people did not take those. I think I should win this game because I worked extremely hard to get to this point, harder than I have in any other game, and I made moves both behind the scenes and out in the open and was able to get to this point. Thank you!

[isaacathom]

ah fuck Zeke has future vision. Zeke has future vision and Rhiana haaassss something. im not sure. im not sure if her caste power is connected to her ghost power o unrelated, like Aradia. though i think having them be connected would be more interesting.

also Wow fuck me Rhiana is literally just Aradia except she keeps her emotions when she dies. oh gee. im an absolute hack. fuck. jesus. oh god. hs knowledge will never reallllly leave me, will it? hahhhh far out.

also no time magic. fuck it.

also i guesssss aradias shit was tied to her dead-ness but that shits vague. hear voices AND telekinesis? got it. plus the key difference is that Aradia was killed deliberately, Rhiana died by ‘accident’. as in, SHE thinks it was deliberate, ELLIOT thinks it was an accident. noones really sure. Rhiana’s fucking pissed, though.

hmm. what power though. like burgundy would make sense because i forgot hiveswap existed and gave us juicy gossip (aka i didnt realise that would happen but i should have known). idk. i dont want her to be burgundy though because then shes too close to aradia - having her be bronze differentiates a little and would also highlight her strange status, in general. id place her yellow but thats Zeke. though i could also make Zeke an olive blood and put Rhiana a little higher, in the bronze-yellow range. lime could also be fun and could explain the fact that she, yknow, persisted, but given the dearth of solid info on lime bloods i wouldnt wanna do that. best keep her bronze yellow. give her like..... er. mind shit. idk. shit like soul. that, or you tie it more into her god tier, which im immediately assuming is Heart. w/ the whole dirk ripping souls out, i cant see why Rhiana, as a Heart player, couldnt like. remove her own soul from her dying body.... thus allowing her to continue to exist in the world. give her mild mind control (really onllllyyy useful on Zeke, unless i go more bronze and make it animal communion). theres room there, though. animal communion is kinda boring but slightly higher mind control would be nice. something like Vriska, except Typical of her caste. or reading minds. but, of course, she cant read Elliots, because shes a bronze and hes violet. hes resistant. as for Zeke having future sight? eh. idk. its incredibly vague future sight, mostly just an overwhelming sense of dread. that, or he sees only good outcomes, but not how to get them. thatd be fun twisted shenanigans, eh. dumb shit like that. though werent sollux’ visions also grim bullshit? oi vey. fuck me.

uhhhhhh. ooh, maybe its contemporary sight! as in, he can see stuff thats happening at that time in other places. normally bad shit. he sees a lot of bad stuff. through this sight he probably bears almost first hand witness to Rhiana absolutely ruining Elliots day. could even intervene, if he wanted. he might have tried. thats his idea - wants to look over and protect all his friends, within reason. the sight is hazy, and he has difficulty /locating/ people. if he knows where they are, he can see them. but if he doesnt, he cant. for this reason, while he has seen Lyndel and Elliot, he has never seen Rhiana. until he visits her Land for the first time and starts absently casting his sight over to her house, that is! :) Rhiana is incredibly uncomfortable and unhappy at him discovering she’s a ghost in this manner. like. is the assumption that the computer cant see ghosts but that people can??? i dont remember how it worked with Aradia. i know her server couldnt see her until she prototyped herself.... hmm. HMMMM. tit. shiiiiit. eh. im sure his sight is part of how he works it out. can he hear too? like, if he can hear, then he probably catches Lyndel seemingly talking to thin air and hearing a voice speaking out of literally nowhere to respond, and recognises the talking style as similar to Rhiana’s. i think the assumption is that he cant see ghosts. idk. maybe we’ll make that clear. if he had stronger sight of this nature, maybe he could, buuuut nope. none of that. 

something like that? also, as an aside, since blue bloods are supposed to be sorta violent, it COULD be interesting if Lyndel actually participates in Elliot’s death in some way. like, shes a sort of pacifist, and is probably actually the pacifying element of the moirallegience with Rhiana, but she’s still a blue blood, and she still has innate Rage. though Elliot is also quite a chill guy, sooooo. they cant all be suppressing rage here, right? itd be stronger for Elliot. maybe have Lyndel be teal, they’re less aggressive. but it would be fun. though that would ALSO rob Rhiana of her catharsis and thats most of the point. maybe Lyndel sets it up. maybe she gets elliot into the position Rhiana needs to arrive and absolutely stomp his shit. meanwhile Zeke is going ‘nOOOONONONOOOOOOOOOOOO STOP fucking hoooollly shit’ poor zeke, honestly. frantically messaging people and begging Lyndel to intervene in the bloodbath that is Rhiana wailing on Elliot, and shes just quiet. he casts his sight to her house. shes not there. hes frantically searching. eventually he finds her in Elliots land, not far from the battle, watching on. he sees her read his message and then ignore it. he tries to call her out on her bs. she eventually responds ‘they both need it’ Zeke cant fucking believe it. Zeke doesnt get it. he’d eventually resolve to go there himself (the fight goes on for a long time - seadwellers are very hardy and Elliot is desperately dodging a lot of the attacks) but would arrive too late to stop Rhiana killing him. he’s just screaming. what the fuck! Lyndel looks away and Rhiana’s just ‘nooo, wait a sec, man...... we’ve got this....’ and eventually elliot re-arrives as a god tier and Zeke is INCREDIBLY fucking confused. someone fill this boy in. and give him a 6 letter name.

................................................................... yea i give up ive got no restraint, all aboard the party