#which is AWESOME this is SO COOL i can just ! ! ! walk around dude :000 ! ! ! !
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my computer wants to update so bad. which is a real shame,
#just me hi#i'll let her update as soon as this button situation gets unbearable lmfshvg#//anyway i am thinking </3#not in a 'microwaving that shiz real good' way but in a 'i'm soaking in the bog tastefully' kinda way#so for like the majority of this year and the last of the year previous i was like. In the Misty Lagoons dude#which sucked but in like a Hint Of Chicory Wood kind of way if you don't know what chicory wood is or tastes like. which i don't (didn't! i#searched and it's an herb :3 it's pretty actually i like the flowers !!) so đź’Ą#but now that i'm out of it it's like. i may be lost kfhsvhfhdj#girl i forgor !!! where am i ! ! what's going on. wait HOW old am i#<- mostly joking but kfhshvhgs#like hm. i think i'm missing something here [camera pans and we find that a huge chunk of the wall + ceiling are missing]#//upsides on this though? oh are there Upsides !!#like 2 upsides but i'm very very pleased abt them hfksvh :33#firstly somewhere over the past year i've lost a good portion of that good ol' shame i had while in public#which is AWESOME this is SO COOL i can just ! ! ! walk around dude :000 ! ! ! !#and i don't have to be wearing a specific outfit that does this or that i just have to like. kind of like shirt i'm wearing and then not#think abt it anymore and look strangers in the eyes sometimes. this is crazy [<- goofing]#the second thing is i know more abt my discomforts. which doesn't sound like an upside but DUDE#DUDE. i recently realized it was upsetting me when people were touching too much of me and like. i can Do Stuff about it#which also sucks. the Doing Stuff about it part but i am GOING to get good at it just wait !!#if i'm upset for some inexplicable reason i can just say Hey i gotta go evil mode for a bit. ciao </3 and nobody dies it's so cool !!!#really cool stuff really cool !!!#/oh and things that aren't in that vein: i'm remembering how to skate ! ! ! ! ! let's funkin GO ! ! ! ! evil brain had me thinking i was#gonna forget Forever pfshvhgs; silly silly#i think i know what i want from this life atm which is very neato. very epic sauce and cool đź‘Ť#also broadening my interests <///3 which is Also really cool i just don' like doin it kfshvhghhs ; i'm starting to enjoy it though so Lmaoo#and christmas is coming up and i Still never know what to ask for kfshvhg ; i think i'm gonna get art supplies which is a bad strategic mov#(i use the same 3 kinds of cheap writing utensils i'm SORRY <//3) but the wrapping paperrrrr is what MAKES it honey ! ! ! đź’Ą#speaking of i've got a cool idea for some stuff later this monthhh but i've gotta get on it aSAP or i won't have enough time kfshvhf#//AH last tag !! i must use it for my farewell !! ciaoder dude !! will likely return with art hfsvhg ; tooooooodles ~~~+ !!
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Silence Ritual Chapter 1 - A Deal With the Devil
(AN/ Heyo guys, Esso here and this is my first story; Silence Ritual. Now firt thing's first, although I already mentioned this in the description, this is a spinoff of Take A Stand: The Broken Mirror by Garouge Faux / @crewefox. It's also a direct sequel to that story so if you haven't read it, please do before reading this. This fic will be around 20 chapters and while it doesn't have a strict update schedule, I will try to update it at least twice a month. So without any further ado, let's begin the Silence Ritual.)
special thanks to @helthehatter for letting me use her OC, Kodi Jones.Â
here’s a link to the fic: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13396893/1/Silence-Ritual
and here’s a link to The Broken Mirror, in case you haven’t read it: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12973009/1/Take-A-Stand-The-Broken-Mirror
Chapter 1: A Deal With The Devil
It was almost 9:30am in Zootopia. Despite being late summer the weather was surprisingly cool. And while most mammals were out, enjoying the weather, a brown-furred bunny running like her life depended on it certainly did not fit in with the surrounding atmosphere. "Shit! I'm so damn late." she cursed under her breath as she made her way to the bank. She had just arrived at the front door of Zootopia first national bank but before she could enter, she was knocked back by three figures. By the time she got herself off the ground, the trio was already speeding away in a white van.
In said van a female hyena took off her mask, looked at duffle bags full of cash her and her partners were holding and cheered "Hell yeah! Hahahaha, that was awesome!"
"Shut up!" a male ram shouted at her. "How 'bout we lose the cops, then we can celebrate all we want." He then turned his attention to the driver. "They still followin' us?"
"Nope." The zebra behind the wheel returned. "Should be smooth sailing from he-"
***CRASH***
The van had somehow swerved off the road and hit a lamp post. The group of robbers got out with ease, none of them were injured.
"What the shit, dude?!" shouted the hyena before pushing the zebra driver "You could've killed us!"
"I didn't do shit! The van just swerved!" the zebra retaliated, clearly rattled by the crash.
"Screw that noise! The hell do you mean it just swerved?" the ram said while trying his best not to kick his accomplice's teeth in.
The trio kept arguing for a few more seconds until another mammal, a buff female leopard, stepped out of the vehicle.
"ENOUGH!" she screamed before adding "We got the money. Let's get out of here before the pigs arrive, and then you can beat up this idiot."
"I keep telling you, I didn't do this! I didn't crash the fu-" the zebra tried to explain, but was stopped mid-sentence when a small piece of metal hit him in the temple, knocking him out cold.
Before any of the other crooks could react, a dozen more metal plates began flying around them. First, two of them enveloped the ram's hands and effortlessly magnetized him onto the crashed van. Then one wrapped itself around the hyena's foot and dragged her across the street until it latched onto a lamppost, leaving her hanging upside down. The rest of the plates began spinning around the leopard. One by one, they began binding her hands, eventually sending her flying towards a sewer grate. Now that all of them were immobilized, an ocelot in his late teens came out from a nearby alley. He was dressed rather plainly, with a black hoodie and torn jeans and would seem completely normal if he didn't have several small pieces of metal levitating around his arms.
"C'mon, cut him some slack, I didn't even give him a chance to control the van" he taunted the leopard.
"Who the hell are you?" she spat while trying to remove her arms from the sewer grate they were stuck to.
"Look, I'ma make it real simple for you dum-dums," he snickered "you did crime, so I glued your asses for the cops to handle."
"What the hell?!" the hyena barked in rage "what did you do to me you freak!"
"You aren't very bright, are you?" the ocelot said condescendingly "let me give you the TLDR, name's Steelswarm, I control metal, I got a tip that you were robbing a bank so I decided to have some fun with you all."
"Like hell you got a tip, you're too young to be a cop! Cut the crap!" yelled the ram.
"I didn't say i was a cop, moron" Steelswarm sighed as he pulled a small star shaped badge from one of his pockets "I'm with Ceartais and you are sooooo fu-" he tried to taunt but was cut off by a thud to the back of his head. The zebra had woken up and had taken the opportunity to knock the gloating vigilante out.
When Steelswarm came to the four robbers we're standing over him, when he was knocked out he lost control of all the metal plates that were holding the crooks.
"Ya dun goofed, kid and now you're gonna pay for screwing around!" the hyena snickered before putting a paw to her face, which began to transform into that of a wolf with golden fur. She fished a pair of glasses out of her pocked and put them on before saying;
"OK, first of all you didn't call for backup once you got the tip."
"Sorry, Clara." the ocelot murmured, still in pain.
"You didn't even try to restrain me after knocking me out!" complained the zebra, as it's face morphed to that of a red fox.
"Sorry, Luna." Steelswarm groaned .
"And what's with all the gloating?" said the "ram" as his body transformed to that of a wolf with black and white fur. "Those restraints were weak, I could've knocked you out myself if you had come any closer."
"Sorry, Kodi" Steelswarm added, sinking further into the ground.
"Overall, that was pretty sloppy" said the fox/bunny hybrid that now stood in the leopard's place "but I'll give you points for the van crash. Also Steelswarm? Dope name."
"Sorr- I mean thanks Robyn." the ocelot stuttered out.
"OK, Bella, simulation over." said Kodi as the city around them began to dematerialize and they were left in a blank room.
Kodi helped the ocelot to his feet before saying, "OK, you have good control over your powers but your communication still needs work. Also you need to pay more attention during combat..."
"Yeah, figures..." groaned Steelswarm "so... same time next week?"
"Yup!" said Clara while looking at her tablet "Oh, but you'll be training with Regina and Hannah then."
"Sweet! See ya then, guys!" yipped the ocelot as he walked towards the elevator.
000
In the six months since Doom's defeat, the entire base had been revamped. The training area was now bigger and had simulations about dealing with situations regarding mammals with powers. A lot of them still had trouble controlling their new abilities and that was causing some issues around the city. Some of the mammals who had a better grasp on their powers chose to use them for crime, since neither the ZPD nor the MCB were properly prepared for dealing with them. A few others either wanted to join Ceartais or start their own vigilante teams. And while Ceartais usually wouldn't entertain the idea of letting anyone join in, but Olivia and Kion had left and Alice was on maternity leave, so the team was missing it's powerhouses. And despite Regina, Harper and Clara all joining the team, they were still rookies and needed supervision. So Kodi felt like had no choice but to start a training program for any empowered mammal willing to join them.
The four mammals sat in the main area of the bunker, almost ready to discuss their patrol positions for the night. They were soon joined by another hybrid, this one more closely resembling an arctic fox, bar the black stripes on her ears and tail.
"Hi, Hannah!" Robyn waved enthusiastically.
"Hi!" the hybrid responded as she made her way to the empty seat next to Clara.
"So we're waiting for Regina and Harper?" Kodi asked just as the elevator to the bunker opened.
Out of it walked a horse and a deer, holding hands. The mare was wearing a black summer dress while the buck wore a green polo shirt and torn jeans.
"Hey, sorry were late. Got held up at home." the deer, Harper, spoke.
"It's OK." Kodi said nonchalantly, before scanning the room.
"Everyone's here so," Kodi started, ready to give out the night's assignments "Me, Hannah and Regina will take Savannah Central and Downtown, there has been a string of robberies and witnesses claim that they were done by empowered mammals. "
"Robyn, you and Clara take Tundra Town. Harper and Luna you have the Rainforest District covered and Bella has Spitfire bots patrolling Sahara Square. Everyone OK with the positions?" the wolf asked.
Everyone nodded in agreement. Despite that, Clara seemed to be bothered by something and as soon as everyone went to gear up, she pulled Kodi aside.
"Hey, you got a sec?" the she-wolf asked quietly.
"Oh, I got more than a "sec"." Kodi said teasingly, as he pulled Clara closer.
"What?! No, not THAT kind of sec! Not at work!" Clara exclaimed "Also, Luna will find us... again."
"Awww... OK." Kodi pouted, feigning disappointment. "What is this about then?"
"Kodi, it's been six months. Why aren't you putting Robyn and Hannah on patrol together?" Clara asked.
"Well... because with you, Regina and Harper being new recruits I want an ori-" the wolf started talking but was interrupted by his girlfriend.
"Don't lie to me, Kodi. You suck at it." Clara huffed "What's really going on?"
"OK look..." Kodi sighed "the city's gone to shit again, there's empowered mammals everywhere, running the training program is stressful and honestly, Robbie and Hannah have been doing OK on their own."
"Who are you trying to fool?" the she-wolf said, somewhat agitated "They're growing apart. I haven't heard Hannah call Robyn "princess" in two weeks. They need to get through this Ronin thing."
"Yes I know... but I just don't want to bring it up. Robyn is still pissed at me for helping with the plan, and I don't think she could ever trust me or Hannah completely again. I can't risk another serious fight between the team. Not while the city needs us." Kodi tried defending himself.
"...You know that's gonna come back and bite you in the ass, right? Like, you're aware that if they find out you're keeping them apart intentionally they're gonna kill you?" Clara asked, knowing that she didn't have the time to argue with her mate.
"Probably..." Kodi returned, looking sullen.
"Look, I know this isn't easy. But you promised that you would mend the team's wounds and you aren't doing yourself any favours right now. It's way too late to change positions now but please at least consider giving them a few assignments together." Clara said before hugging her boyfriend.
"I will. I just don't wanna screw this up..." Kodi answered.
000
The Wave was without a doubt one of the biggest tragedies to hit Zootopia. Even six years later, a lot of the damage was still present. There were still parts of Sahara Square and Tundra Town that were uninhabitable, and there was barely anyone left to even live in Little Rodentia. There was one part of Zootopia that was largely unaffected by The Wave, however; Outback Island. Despite being relatively small, it still housed over 50,000 mammals and was home of the first functioning prison for empowered mammals. The facility could hold up to 500 inmates, and for the last six months, it was Esso Reese's home.
The lynx thought that The Cauldron was a hellhole, but this was worse. She could not use her powers, thanks to the modified shock collar that had been on her neck ever since she arrived there. Any of the activities that helped her deal with The Cauldron were useless here. She couldn't listen to music, her snarky attitude had put her in solitary more than once, and while she could still technically take bets on the other inmates... it was highly discouraged unless she wanted to find herself on the receiving end of a shank. The worst part, however, was the loneliness. None of the mammals she met on the Cauldron could visit her as they were witnesses in her case. And none of the imprisoned mammals wanted anything to do with her. She was laying in bed, just hoping for the sentencing piece to come as soon as possible so she could finally know how much longer did she have to endure this for, when one of the guards approached her cell.
"Reese, your lawyer is here." the rhino said in a stern tone.
The two headed to a small area, similar to an interrogation room. Her lawyer was a pig in a beige suit and he was already waiting for them. As soon as they entered, the rhino locked the door, in case the lynx wanted to try something stupid.
"Hello, Sabrina" the pig started, in his usual dull tone "how are you holding up?"
"Well other than the food and coffee being shit, the guards being abusive, everyone hating me and the crushing loneliness... ten outta ten. Also call me Esso." the lynx replied with what she wanted to be sarcasm but in the end it just came out flat and broken.
"Please, please, please tell me you got good news." she continued.
"Well, given the circumstances, I don't think the jury is in your favour." the pig returned.
"Sweet. Awesome. Love to hear it... how much am I looking at?" Esso barely managed to get out as she put her hear in her arms.
"Twenty five years minimum."
"Lovely..."
At this point Esso could not sink any lower. She just huddled in her chair and tried her best to hide her tears. "Just... absolutely lovely."
"There is another option. You could plead insanity." the lawyer tried to calm her down.
"What for? So they'll throw me in an mental asylum for the rest of my life instead of a prison?" the lynx snapped.
"Please, Sabrina, calm down." the pig tried to reason.
"Screw that!" Esso shouted, gaining the guard's attention. "I was kidnapped, almost killed several times and thrown in here for some bullshit that I didn't even know I did!"
"They have body cam footage, I can't jus-" her lawyer cut in.
"Now I'm either gonna be stuck here or in the looney bin until I croak, because I was forced into a cult six years ago! Also for the umpteenth time, call me Ess-" the lynx ranted until her shcok collar delivered a painful sting to her neck, which brought her to her knees.
"You know what?" Esso said through sobs "Just... do whatever... I don't give a shit. Guard, I'm done here."
The rhino guard guided Esso back to her cell. As soon as the door locked behind her, she collapsed into her bed started crying. She had no options left. It felt like hours before the same guard unlocked her cell.
"Reese, someone wants to see you." he said in his usual monotone.
"...what?" the lynx murmured as she got out of bed.
Esso walked the same path she just took. She was wondering who could possibly be visiting her. Her parents were dead, the other mammals from the Cauldron couldn't see her and she barely had any friends in Zootopia.
When she entered the small room, she was greeted by two mammals. One she already knew and hated. It was Skye Savage, the director of the MCB. The arctic fox sat uncomfortably in a one of the chairs and looked at Esso with disdain. The other was a maned wolf she had never seen before. He was wearing a burgundy suit with a matching tie.
"Skye..." Esso sneered at the fox "came to see your favourite little psycho?"
"Shut up and sit down!" Skye barked failing to contain her anger.
"Who's your boyfriend there?" Esso continued to prod. "You want an audience while you scream at me?"
"Now listen here you-" Skye said in a low growl before she was interrupted by the maned wolf clearing his throat.
"Please control yourself Mrs. Savage." the other mammal spoke calmly. "Now, Ms. Reese, or do you prefer Esso?"
"Esso is fine." the lynx replied, puzzled by the current situation.
"Noted." the maned wolf said as he pulled out a tablet from within his suit and started typing. "I have a proposition that you might be interested in."
"Ooooh, let me guess" Esso mocked "you wanna transfer me to an underground super prison, or some off the grid looney bin to lobotomize me?"
"Heh heh, I love your sense of humour." the maned wolf feigned a laugh. "No, I'm a representative of Ashe Incorporated, or Ashecorp. for short. We are an elite company that specializes in research into mammals with extraordinary abilities."
"Oh, so you don't wanna lobotomize me, just experiment on me. Dandy." Esso said sarcastically.
"Not the case at all Ms. Esso. We were made aware of your "outburst" six months ago." the wolf returned as calm as ever, "We want to harness your powers not only to better understand these new abilities mammals have gotten, but to also better the city of Zootopia and, potentially, the world."
"OK cut the crap, what kind of cult is this?" Esso snickered.
"We're not a cult Ms. Esso." the maned wolf answered "I understand why you would be wary of us, but given your current situation I don't think you have a better option. Especially since you haven't heard the benefits of joining us."
Esso looked at the maned wolf, now much more attentive.
"What benefits?"
The maned wolf had a small smile on his face now.
"Well for starters, you'll get full immunity."
"Bullshit." Esso said under her breath. "As if Resting Bitchface McGee over there would allow it."
"Oh, but she already did." the maned wolf produced a piece of paper and a ballpoint pen from his suit and gave it to the lynx. It appeared to be some sort of contract and while Esso couldn't recognize any of the signatures, the fact that Skye wasn't objecting to this made her believe that whoever that maned wolf was, he was being serious.
"You'll also get combat and self-defense training, paid accommodation in any hotel throughout Zootopia and access to any empowered mammal's data. All you have to do is sign the contract." the maned wolf continued, still calm but clearly more excited than usual.
"I... what's the catch?" Esso stammered.
"Well, in return, you'll have to help Ashecorp collect more data on empowered mammals." the maned wolf replied with his usual calmness. "Or you can choose not to sign and none of this would have happened and you would be back awaiting trial. So... what's it gonna be?"
Esso didn't know what to think. It was obvious to her that this offer was too good to be true, but what other choice did she have? The lynx knew that she had no chance of walking out innocent from the trial, and all of her other options involved some type of imprisonment. Maybe this one did to but right now it seemed like her only way out of this Hell.
Esso cursed under her breath as she grabbed the pen and signed her name on the contract, on what she thought was her deal with the Devil. "I want in."
(AN/ DUN DUN DUUUUUUN! (always wanted to do this) Ceartais has started a training program. Kodi is trying his best as team leader. And Esso accepts an... interesting deal. Did you like it, did you not? Either way, please review. If you have any suggestions on how I can improve the fic, please put them in the reviews as well. Next time on Silence Ritual; Esso learns what her deal is all about, Olivia tries to balance professional and personal life and Robyn and Hannah go on their first joint mission in months. See u soon folks.)
#zootopia#zootopia fanfiction#disney#fanfic#take a stand#take a stand tbm#disney fanfiction#zootropolis
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Thailand
^ The late King Bhumibol, whose passing has spawned an odd competition between every kind of establishment as to who can create the largest and goldest shrine to him
So I went to Thailand a couple weeks ago. Thailand is a fun little place in Asia, and it’s got that dirty and wild side that people know about, as well as a lot more. The citizens seem a little tired of tourists, but most of them are still nice. They’ve got Buddhist monks, they’ve got clothes cheaper than dirt, they’ve got bars and parties, they’ve got wild dogs and buffalo-looking creatures wandering around. The taxis and most other businesses seem to take the law as a vague suggestion, and haggling is definitely accepted. You could live in Thailand for ten years on $25, 000 (and decently well). Just because of the slow, leisurely pace of this trip, instead of telling this chronologically, I’ll break this up into areas of interest.
Tuk-Tuk Drivers
A Tuk-tuk is an open taxi, and mostly they seem to operate outside of the law, not that anyone seems to care. Pretty much it looks like someone affixed a small sitting area to the back of a motorcycle and started zooming around, picking up passengers for dirt cheap. It’s a super fun way to get around, and you haven’t really experienced the best of Thailand unless you take one somewhere.
ONE SERIOUS WARNING: Beware taxis, tuk-tuk drivers, and mostly anyone else who speaks really good English and offers to take you to where you want only after you go to his friend’s tailor shop, or bar, or whatever else. Some people here will attempt to trick you into going really far distances and basically extorting you into paying a bunch of money or buying stuff you don’t want or else you’re stranded. I had one douche tell me how much he wanted me to pay in the middle of a tuk-tuk ride, and when I refused because it was a ridiculous sum, he told me I had to pay twice as much and wouldn’t let me get out. He drove wildly into oncoming traffic multiple times, and refused to let me and my friend out. Don’t let suspiciously overly friendly people take advantage. Also, tuk-tuk rides have no set price, so you should give them what you think is fair. This being said, don’t let this turn you off to tuk-tuk rides. Weaving through oncoming traffic while trying to hold on to a plastic woven spiderweb, trying to escape the madman who is also in control of your fate at top speed is part of the experience.
The Streets of Bangkok
Bangkok is so hot that people wake up at around 11 and start opening their stores and restaurants for business around noon.  Don’t expect to get anything done if you’re any early riser. The streets in Bangkok have all manner of crazy food and cheap clothes. There are a bunch of people sitting in piles upon piles of cheap wholesale goods, bare feet, just chilling. Some of the side streets have cramped mall-like areas that you can barely walk through because people have so much random stuff to sell. And they pretty much just unload it from a truck on the sidewalk and sit on it all day unless someone wants to buy it.
^ A covered area we walked past with a ton of Buddhas
^ Random street with a waterway going through the area. They have a lot of water cutting through populated areas.
^ Pretty sure this is a spirit house, and as I understand it, these are for tricking evil spirits into think that this is the real house so they won’t enter.
^ Another spirit house, I think, or maybe some kind of shrine?
^ MOAR SPIRIT HOUSES (possibly for sale?)
^Buddhist temple
^ Close up of those cool ass windows
Toilets
Toilets are super weird in Thailand, but maybe that’s just in the city areas. I don’t know, but I do know that many of the ones I encountered said things in multiple languages like “Do not flush toilet paper! Throw it away! This is for the environment.” Often, the toilet paper would be located outside the stall. They also seem to do this thing where they have a full shower head inside the toilet stall. I am not sure what to make of that.
Songkran Water Festival
This was seriously the best time.
^ Street full of people shooting each other with water guns (there’s more of them than it looks like)
I had been eager to come here during this particular time of year because apparently what had started as a demure celebration of sprinkling small amount of water on people’s heads had slowly evolved.  It gets to be about 110 degrees by noon on a normal basis, so someone had the great idea to turn this several-day holiday into a national water gun fight.
By the time my friend and I walked down a random side street and were finally ambushed, my friend just looked at the ground in somber acceptance. Four joyful dudes poured a bucket of water on us and then wiped baby powder on our faces- marking us. *horror movie sound effects*
(I, meanwhile, had totally forgotten what was happening so I screamed when water was poured over me. It was awesome.)
After a few days, our hostel had towels on every floor and every person we came in contact with was perpetually soaked. One day, as I was flaunting some bright red underwear beneath my saturated pants, my travel buddy became vengeful. “That’s it,” quoth he, “Tomorrow we buy super soakers.”
Notes about this: If you intend to go during this time of year, bring MANY changes of socks. The participants will also shoot you if you are on a motorcycle or tuk-tuk. It’s SUPERFUN for the first two days but then you might find yourself wishing you had more socks, and sprinting past kindergarteners with tiny bowls of water who pour it ONLY on your feet which would be one thing you’ve been trying to keep dry the whole time. You will also be unprepared at some point and get soaked by an entire street of cheering folks. Some will pour entire buckets of ice cold water on you- or more disturbingly, they will pour very warm water on you. People also do drive-bys from truck beds.
Pattaya
^ The people of Pattaya are also participating in Songkran
We only spent one day here, but I immediately understood why this is a tourist area. There are a lot of water sports like jet skiing, some sort of parachute-gliding over the water, boats. They have bars and parties galore, nice country lanes, nice and very cheap houses mostly owned by expats, cool Buddhist temples, laser tag, elephant rides, crocodile farms, the “Floating Market,” and more. The only down side is that everything is way more expensive here than in Bangkok. I’d recommend a vacation here if one were planning to go to Thailand for a short visit.
^ The Beach in Pattaya
^ Water sports are available on the beach of Pattaya
Aquarium
So there we were, waiting to get into the aquarium in the basement of a mall in Bangkok, when a lady approached us and asked if we wanted to skip the line. It sounded weird, but it turns out there is a deal where you pay a lot more money and you can not only skip the line, but go inside the fish tank.
 They took us into an area where you can see over the top of the tank and gave us wet suits to put on. Then they lowered this weird helmet onto us that was basically a reverse fish bowl. We got to walk in the tank with sharks and stuff, but we were also part of the entertainment, it would seem. Everyone outside the tank was watching us and taking pictures, so I got to find out how awkward it is to be a celebrity for four minutes. Just smile and wave, boys.Â
^ Above the tank, waiting to go in
^ Getting in the tank
^People were behind us watching us watch sharks from behind the glass
^ Us becoming aware that we had an audience
Thai Massages
If you like being in massive amounts of pain, these massages are for you. Thai massages are famous, and I’m sure they do a lot of good for a person’s body, but wow. They get in there deep, and you won’t like it. If you need some serious attention, they’ll give you that. Even a simple pedicure or foot massage will probably hurt quite a bit the first time you go. And probably a few time after that as well. I didn’t really like them because of how painful they were, but personal preference I guess. Mr. Superman (I’ll talk about him later) from our hostel seemed to think they were part of the true Thai experience. I do not have any pictures of my agony.Â
Food
Thai food is damn good. The noodles, the smoothies, Tom Yam soup, Pad Thai, you’ve got to try it all. Tom Yam is a spicy lemongrass and shrimp type deal, and you need to try it. I always loved that soup, but it’s even better from actual Thailand. The smoothies are great and come in huge variety, and are usually freshly made right then and there. I loved the coconut ones close to the hostel, but I also tried one from a small cafĂ© that involved dates and papayas.Â
There is one food that reigns above all the others: The Durian. This fruit is very smooth in texture, and when exposed to air, at first smells faintly of mild onion, and then over time develops the odor of a ripe fermented gym sock. It is banned from most stores and establishments. It is inexplicably popular and looks like this;
^ The spikes are there to warn you.
Obviously I was super excited to see one and hold it. The lady selling them was amused and a man standing behind me in the uncropped picture looked thoroughly disgusted. This fruit divides a nation.
Animals
In addition to these soon-to-be mentioned creatures, I also saw a water buffalo looking thing that I don’t know what it was, and also a bunch of wild dogs. If someone could tell me what the water buffalo thing is, I would be grateful.Â
Anyways, first we went to a zoo in Bangkok and saw a nearly not fenced in enclosure with a super low concrete wall housing some bears. Naturally we went to go see the bears. He is bathing in this small pond like a hot tub for bears, and you can only see his head. He was pretty close to us but then some douche thought he was into celebrating Songkran and started shooting him with water. He moved. :(
We also went to a tiger park in Pattaya where they raise baby tigers by hand and treat them almost like cats. Large, dangerous cats. You can go inside the cage and pet them, but you can only do what the keepers tell you.Â
^ Us petting a “small size” tiger
^ “Small size” tigers playing in their pool
^ Lil baby guy that they kept bottle feeding
I also got to ride an elephant and that was cool.
^ This was fun and we got rings made of elephant hair that are super tough and feel like plastic. I wish I’d asked for the elephant’s name, though.Â
Hostel
The place we stayed was a hostel, which was interesting because we got to see a bunch of interesting other travelers, including this one super weird dude that I called Mr. Superman who spoke enough English to give us some recommendations and walked around naked a lot and had some crazy outfits for his raves that he went to. He wore a superman outfit at one point and coated his hair in blue dye and sparkles, hence the nickname. This place was called “Boxpackers Hostel” and it was clean, had a good hang out area, and they served breakfast. I’d say hostels are good for meeting strange people, or if you really want to save money because they are not expensive. Some people say they are dangerous or weird but I think it depends on which one.Â
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