#which honestly good for her that she's not letting this bring her down

[gingiesworld]

In The Stars (1/?)

Wanda Maximoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Fluff, mentions of death

Word Count: 5.7k

Every Sunday, without fail, Y/N would spend a few hours at their wife's grave, telling her about their week, putting fresh daisies in the pot, Jean's favourite flower. That would always be before they would head over to Pietro Maximoff's for Sunday dinner.

The two had met in their first year of college, being roommates and soon becoming fast friends. It was Pietro who had introduced Y/N to Jean at a college party they had both attended, soon falling head over heels for her. They had been together all through the last three years of college, Y/N then proposing after they had graduated, knowing they had saw a future with her.

Once Y/N had arrived at Pietro's, they let themselve's inside, soon hearing voices coming from the living room. They could hear both Pietro and his wife, Monica talking with another. Approaching the living room with caution, after taking off their jacket and hanging it up, they stood in the doorway, their eyes landed on an unfamiliar woman with brown hair. Although they had recognised her from some pictures dotted around Pietro's house.

"Y/N! I didn't hear you come in." Pietro beamed as they stepped inside. "Here." He handed them a beer from the table as Y/N sat down in an arm chair. "Y/N, this is Wanda, my younger sister." He introduced them.

"We're the same age." Wanda told him, only getting waved off by her brother.

"I was born first." He reminded her.

"Wow, 12 minutes before." She told him, a teasing undertone in her voice before turning to Y/N. "It's nice to meet you, I've heard so much about you over the years."

"All good, I hope." Y/N smiled gently, taking her hand in a friendly shake.

"Of course it was." She told them.

"Well, someone had to keep him out of trouble." Monica spoke up, taking a sip of her wine as Pietro feigned hurt.

"I was a model student." He protested, making the other three laugh.

"Really, like that time you ran naked around the quad at lunch time?" Y/N told him, bringing up one of the many fond memories they had of their college years.

"Well, I managed to win over my wife with that." He smirked triumphantly.

"No, I just felt sorry for you." She told him, nudging his shoulder. Earning a low wow from her husband. It was in these moments that they shared with their best friends that helped them after their mornings at the cemetary. Giving them a sense of familiarity and comfort that they needed during the last couple of years since the accident.

"You're married?" Wanda questioned, referring to their wedding ring, which they had refused to take off. She never noticed Pietro's head shake as Y/N smiled down at their finger.

"I was." They answered her honestly. "She uh." Y/N played with their wedding ring as they thought of Jean. "My Jean passed away."

"I'm so sorry." Wanda apologised, instantly feeling a regret of asking them, not knowing how raw the loss was.

"Hey, Wands." Pietro spoke up. "I need your help a moment, with dinner." Wanda nodded as she soon followed her brother to the kitchen.

"I thought we were ordering?" She asked him, raising a confused brow.

"We are." He told her. "It's just that, Y/N comes here every Sunday after they visit Jean. They always spend every Sunday morning with her."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make them uncomfortable." She told him. "I was just curious."

"I know, it's okay." He told her. "It was two years ago, but it's still kind of pretty raw. They were together since our Sophmore year at college." Wanda nodded, listening as her brother spoke before they were interrupted.

"Hey, I'm going to head home." Y/N told the two.

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." Wanda started, Y/N gave her a kind smile, waving her off.

"You didn't." They told her. "I've just had a really long week and I'm exhausted." They spoke calmly, although they were a swirl of emotions inside.

"We can always have dinner another night?" Pietro suggested.

"Of course." They agreed. "How about we have it at mine? On Wednesday evening?"

"Sounds like a plan." Pietro agreed.

"Of course you're welcome to come too, Wanda." Y/N told her.

"I'd love to." Wanda smiled, agreeing easily. Wanting to know more about her twins life since she had went to Oxford University, and living in London for years after her graduating. Y/N then bid their goodbyes before they headed home.

"I guess now it's just the three of us." Monica said as she entered the kitchen, refilling her glass. "So, how is Vis?" Monica asked Wanda, who tensed at his name.

"He is good, happy with the woman I caught him with." She answered, anger seeping through her tone.

"Is that why you moved back here?" Pietro asked her. "Or is there more?"

"Well, I miss you and our parents." She told him. "And I had no reason left to stay in London anymore." She helped herself to more wine. "Although, I am thinking of starting a new book. I have some ideas I have been playing with, but it's something I am excited about."

"That's amazing." Pietro beamed. "But I'll still kick his British ass if I ever meet him." The two girls laughed before they all retreated to the living room, deciding on where they were ordering from.

--

As the days passed and Wednesday arrived, Y/N had prepared everything for the dinner. Cooking was always something they had loved to do, finding a sense of calm in the daily task. Although, they settled on pasta carbonara as they had a tiring day at work, and needing to shower.

"Hey." They greeted the three as they answered the door, allowing them inside.

"It smells nice in here." Monica complimented them, before turning to Pietro. "Why don't you ever cook for me?"

"Unless you want salmonella or a frozen pizza that's still frozen." Y/N teased, recalling their time together as roommates.

"I thought he could cook." Monica gasped, recalling the home dates they had.

"No, it was me hiding in the kitchen." Y/N told her, leading them to the dining room. "I remember he once tried to roast a chicken, it was burnt but still raw."

"The oven was broken." He whined, making them all laugh.

"He was always like that, even when we were kids." Wanda told them. "He once set the toaster on fire while making toast."

"It's like he has a special talent." Y/N laughed before they headed to the kitchen, Wanda following behind them to help bring through the drinks and food while Pietro mumbled incoherently. The four of them shared small conversations as they ate, before Y/N decided to ask Wanda a question. "I hear that you're a writer?" They asked her.

"I am." She answered, wiping her mouth with a napkin. "I am currently working on a novel idea, just trying to work out the plot and plan it out."

"Pietro told me you have also wrote some poetry?" They asked her.

"I used to." She told them. "But unfortunately it wasn't good enough."

"Well, I'm sure whoever said that, is completely wrong and untalented." They told her, Wanda smiled shyly as she sipped her wine.

"Y/N here runs their own business." Pietro told Wanda proudly.

"I wouldn't call it that." Y/N told him.

"I would, you have your own employees who work for you." Monica told them. "You built it from the ground after finishing college before doing a course in construction."

"That's amazing." Wanda told them with a smile.

"Jean helped me a lot with it." They tried to wave them off, not sure how to take the proud compliments. "She used to take care of the office work so I could still head out on jobs." They smiled sadly before they started to gather the empty plates, Wanda then stood up and followed them, helping with dishes.

"I know that sometimes it's sad to talk about her, especially with her not being here with you." Wanda spoke tenderly, watching as they rinsed the plates. "But it does help sometimes, to remember all of the good that she brought into your life."

"She was everything that was good with my life." Y/N told her honestly. Wanda could see the pain and grief in their eyes, but their was also a glimpse of comfort as they spoke.

"It is best to have loved and lost, than to have never known true happiness." Wanda told them. "The pain that is left behind will always be there, but so will all of those memories you both had created together."

"She was my happiness." Y/N told her honestly. "I loved everything about her. Her voice, her laugh, I loved it whenever she sang, although she couldn't really sing, but seeing her happy whenever she was lost in a song." They smiled at the memories, unaware that both Monica and Pietro were eaves dropping. "She brought me so much comfort and happiness, and I fell more and more in love with her every moment I spent with her. Even when she would try to fight me to get me to drink water." They laughed lightly, unaware of the growing ease within as they spoke. "Jean was an amazing and remarkable woman, she was serious but she had a playful childish side. She was just perfect and I was lucky that I got to call her my wife, my soulmate. She was my forever." They told Wanda, a tear falling from their eye. "Thank you." Y/N whispered as they wiped their eyes.

"For what?" She asked them.

"For listening." They told her. "It's not easy for me to talk about her, but I don't know why I even told you about her." They looked at their hands, confusion etched onto their face.

"You do know why." Wanda told them. "You don't quite know it yet, but you." She then moved towards them. "So, what's for desert?" She asked, raising her brow as Y/N chuckled at her.

"Well, I didn't have time to make one from scratch." They answered her as they moved towards their freezer, taking out four small pots of ice cream. "So, I improvised, besides I know Pietro's favourite is cookie dough."

"It's like he's constantly going through a break up." Wanda joked, grabbing the spoons as the two laughed, Monica stifled her own as Pietro scowled, making their way back to their seats. Both Wanda and Y/N had joined them shortly after. The four of them enjoyed the rest of their evening, full of laughter and more digs at Pietro and his lack of cooking skills. 

"Well, I guess we should head out." Pietro said, standing up from his seat since they had since moved to the living room. "Monica has work in the morning, and we know that if she doesn't get enough sleep, I'm the one who suffers when she comes home." 

"Of course." Y/N smiled, following the three of them as they made their way towards the front door. Pietro and Monica had hugged them, bidding their goodbyes before Wanda. 

"Thank you for tonight." She told them, a smile on her face as the two were being watched. 

"No, thank you, Wanda." They told her sincerely. "It felt great to finally talk about Jean."

"Well, if you ever want to talk about Jean, or anything at all, I'm here." She told them with a soft smile. "Besides, it's nice to make a new friend in a new place." 

"I'm glad we can be friends." Y/N smiled gently, Wanda's smile matching theirs. "I hope we can hang out again sometime, I especially could do with more embarrassing stories of Piet, and I'll even give tell you some too." 

"You have a got a deal." Wanda agreed, the idea of having more ways to tease her brother extremely appealing. She then gave them a short hug before bidding her goodbye and making her way to the car, Y/N waving them off as they drove away. Once they had locked the door, they made their way to the garage, the smell of sawdust and wood filling their senses as they moved to the rocking chair they was currently working on. Finding a sense of peace and comfort at the task, humming to the song that was on the radio as they worked. 

--

As time went on, Y/N still remained with their Sunday routine, although spending more time with Wanda had become a part of their life. A fresh bouquet of daisies in their hand as they approached Jean's grave, clearing out the old flowers before placing the new ones, and wiping down the head stone before they took a seat on the soil, not caring that it was still damp from the previous night's rainfall. A smile on their face as they looked at her photo, it was one of their favourite pictures of her, the smile that she hated which had always made their heart skip a beat. 

"Hey, I'm back again." They smiled as they started talking. "I met Piet's sister a few weeks ago as you know, but we have also been hanging out together more and more. She is the complete opposite to him, she's funny too." Y/N continued to talk to her about their outings with Wanda, although they could feel a twinge of guilt, realising that Wanda had managed to make her way into their heart as Jean had done before. "But I don't want to forget you." They whispered, their eyes stinging with unshed tears. "I can't explain what I feel when I'm with Wanda, I know we're both friends but I can't help thinking that maybe there could be something more. Is it wrong?" 

"It's not wrong." A voice spoke from beside them, their attention turning to the next plot. "You're still only young, and it's okay to move on, that is what she would want for you." They gestured towards Jean's headstone. "I'm Charles." He held out his hand for them, Y/N stood up, wiping their hands on their trousers before shaking it. 

"Y/N." They introduced themselves. "But why does it feel wrong?" They asked him. 

"Because Jean still holds a place in your heart." He told them. "Moving on doesn't mean you're replacing her, it's just that you have so much love inside of you that their is still some love left to share." Y/N listened to him. "Jean would want you to be happy, and she would want you to continue to live your life, whether that be with someone new." He gave them a gentle smile. "When I lost my first wife, I was lost, I thought that there was no hope left, I was ready to give up and then I met Connie, she broke through to me, she made me feel something again and I didn't feel the pain of loss as strong as before." 

"So, it's okay to move on?" They questioned, still unsure. 

"Of course it is, as long as you are ready to yourself." He told them. "I have known a lot of people throw themselves into meaningless physical relationships after losing someone, and that never ends well. The shame along with the grief can be overwhelming, so you have to know yourself if you are ready, if your heart has healed before you do move on." He patted their shoulder. "But only you can know that, only you can know if you are ready." 

After their encounter at the cemetery, they had decided to miss having dinner at Pietro's, unsure about seeing Wanda, confused about their feelings. They made their way back home, and headed towards their garage, putting the finishing touches on the rocking chair before varnishing. It was a surprise gift they were making for Pietro and Monica, knowing that the two were trying for a baby. 

"Hey." A voice interrupted them, turning off the radio as they concentrated on the varnishing. "How long have you been working on this?"

"A few months." Y/N mumbled, finishing the first coat before putting the brush down, turning around to see their younger sister. "How's Lena?" They asked her, moving to wash their hands in the sink before moving to hug Kate. 

"She's good." She answered them, returning the hug. "Who's the chair for?" She questioned. 

"Still full of questioned I see." They mused, a smirk on their face. 

"Yes I am, now answer it." She told them, a proud smile on her face. 

"Pietro and Monica." They answered, the two heading towards the kitchen. "They're trying for a baby, and I thought it would be nice for the nursery." They grabbed two cans of soda from the fridge. "Although, they don't know about it yet." The two moved towards the living room, sitting down on the sofa. "How was Russia?" They asked her. "You went to visit Lena's parents right?" 

"We did." She answered, reaching for the remote. "It was cold, very cold but it was nice for Lena to see them, I know she misses them both a lot, and Natasha can be a little bit too overprotective." 

"Well, she is her baby sister." Y/N told her with an understanding. 

"Not of Lena, she's overprotective of me." Kate told them. "She claims she doesn't care about Lena."

"Believe me, she cares about Lena more than she will tell you." They told her. "It's how siblings are, you should know this." 

"Yeah, yeah." She waved them off, looking through Netflix for something to watch. "Well, what are you ordering for dinner?" She asked as she soon settled on Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. 

"What?" They chuckled as Kate turned to face them. 

"Food. Things you eat." She told them. "I'm feeling like pizza." She told them matter of factly. "You should order pizza." Y/N only chuckled before they reached for their phone, opening the app and ordering their pizza as the movie started. As the movie went on, Kate then turned to Y/N, observing them. 

"What?" They asked as they felt her eyes on them.

"You seem different." She told them, watching as they turned to face her. "It's a good different." Before they could respond, the doorbell rang, prompting them to get up and get their pizzas, setting them both on the coffee table as Kate sighed contently at the smell. "You seem happier, like you aren't in pain as much as before." 

"I am happier." They answered her honestly. "I feel lighter, like I'm not drowning in grief as I once was." 

"That's good." She smiled softly. "You deserve to be happy, Jean would want that for you." 

"I know, I have already been told that once today." They told her, recounting their visit to the cemetery, Kate listening to them and nodding in agreement with Charles, but not pushing them for more details. The night went on as the two watched multiple movies, until Kate had fell asleep on the couch, prompting Y/N to carry her to the guest bedroom, tucking her in once they removed her shoes before closing the door behind them as they left. Checking that they had locked up before they retreated to their own room, doing their night time routine before they climbed under the covers. Reaching for their phone, seeing a message from Wanda from earlier, typing out a quick message before they lay back, staring at the ceiling before their phone pinged with another message from Wanda. 

Wanda: You're still awake? 

Y/N: No, I can sleep text :)

Wanda chuckled at the humour as she lay in the bed of her brother's guest bedroom, enjoying this side of Y/N. She was unsure of what to text back, that was until her phone rang, Y/N's name showing up on her screen. 

"Hey." She greeted breathlessly as she answered, unable to fight the smile on her face. "Are you okay?" She asked them. 

"I am." They answered her truthfully. "For the first time in a long time, I am okay. How are you? Are you okay?" They asked her, curious as to why she was still awake so late. 

"I am." She told them, pausing slightly before adding. "I think."

"What's happened?" They asked her, she could hear the rustle of their sheets as they moved to sit up, leaning up against their headboard giving her their full attention. Listening as she laughed slightly, before she let out a shaky sigh. 

"It's just Vis." She told them, unsure if she should continue. 

"What did he do?" They asked her, although the mention of her ex made them feel both uncomfortable and angry. 

"He texted me, he somehow found my number and told me he is moving here." She told them, Y/N remained silent allowing her to continue. "He had been promoted but it comes with a transfer to the New York branch, and he wants to meet up with me. I don't know what to do." She spoke barely above a whisper. 

"Did you love him?" They asked her tenderly. 

"I did, but he hurt me and I don't exactly know who he is anymore." She told them honestly. "I don't want to go back to being the woman he continuously tore down, I have been happier since leaving him behind in London, since being here with my brother and since meeting you." 

"Then you don't have to meet with him." Y/N told her. "You are your own woman, you are allowed to make your own decisions and make your own way in life. Just because he is moving here, doesn't mean that you have to see him or get back with him. You should do what you feel is right for you in your heart, what you know will make you happy." Wanda listened as they spoke, a small smile playing on her lips. "You create your own path in life, you get to decide who you want to be in your life to celebrate your successes."

"So, I shouldn't meet up with him?" She asked them. 

"You already know the answer to that, Wanda." They told her softly. "The answer is in your heart or that feeling in your gut. The one person you should always trust is yourself." 

"Thank you." She whispered, wiping a tear that had fell, knowing that they were right. "Would you stay with me, at least until I fall asleep?" She asked, her voice small as she was afraid of what their answer was going to be. 

"Of course I will." They told her, reaching over to put their phone on charge and on speaker, resting it on the night stand, not knowing that Wanda was repeating the same actions before getting comfier under her blankets. Wanda listened as Y/N told her about their surprise visit from their younger sister, her eyes slowly growing heavier before she succumbed to sleep. Once Y/N had heard a small snore, they smiled as they settled themselves, closing their eyes and sleeping. 

--

Since that night, Wanda had distanced herself from Y/N, she was ashamed of her actions and her request for Y/N to stay with her while she slept, she had even ended the call abruptly when she woke before Y/N. Although Y/N was confused, with their growing feelings for her and the way she hadn't really spoken to them since that night, but they had respect for her. So, they decided to respect the space she had clearly wanted, even though it had seemed to hurt them slightly. 

"Hey." Pietro spoke up, entering Y/N's house and seeing them on sat on the sofa, their laptop open as they finished up some office work for their business. "Are you okay?" He questioned as he sat in an armchair, causing Y/N to look up briefly. 

"Yeah, I'm okay." They answered him, returning their gaze back to their task at hand. "Are you okay?" Pietro sighed, seeing a change in their behaviour, like they were going backwards from when they had lost Jean. 

"I'm okay, I'm just worried about you." He told them, watching as they moved the computer from their lap and getting on their feet.

"You don't need to be, I'm fine." They said as they walked towards the kitchen, grabbing a bottle from the fridge.

"Are you sure?" Pietro asked as he followed them. "You haven't really spoke to anyone in a while, nor have you came over for Sunday dinner." He watched as Y/N sighed, putting the bottle down on the counter.

"I've got some paper work to do." They told him, turning to face him, their expression void of any emotion.

"You know you can talk to me, right?" Pietro asked, a gentle smile on his face. "But I will never push you, and I will always be a call away."

"Thank you." Y/N replied sincerely. "I really appreciate it." They then picked up their bottle, making their way back into the livint room. Pietro sighed, knowing he wasn't going to get much of a conversation out of them, deciding to bid his goodbye. Y/N then leaned their head back on the sofa, rubbing their face with a groan. They felt bad for blocking him out, but they didn't want to press for information on Wanda, respecting her space.

Although, Wanda wasn't much better, she had spent most of her time hold up in the guest room, her laptop on her lap as she sat in the dark, the Dick Van Dyke show was playing in the background.

"Hey." Pietro knocked lightly on the door, gaining his sister's attention. "I made some tea." He approached her, handing her her cup of tea, watching as she inhaled the warm scent before taking her first sip.

"Thank you." She thanked him, holding the cup between her hands.

"Are you okay?" He asked her, sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Yeah." She answered him, although he could tell she was lying.

"You know, you can always talk to me if ever you need." He told her, not wanting to push her, she gave him a small smile before taking another sip before placing the cup on the nightstand. "So, what are you working on?" He asked her, intrigued about her story ideas.

"I'm just working on a plan for my next book." She told him. "Hopefully it will be better than my previous work."

"All of your work is amazing." He told her proudly.

"No, it isn't." She whispered sadly, the words of her ex flashing through her mind about her poetry and previous novels. "That's what he always said."

"He as in Vis?" Pietro questioned, watching as Wanda only nodded, closing her laptop. "He is completely wrong, you sold thousands of copies, all he got was a job at his family's business. You worked hard to get your works out there, you did that all on your own." He opened his arms for her, watching as she quickly dived in for a hug. "He is nothing but a piece of shit, and you deserve to find someone who will love you for who you are, someone who will encourage you to write every idea that comes into your mind."

"But, what if I don't find them?" She questioned, lifting her head, Pietro wiped the tears that had fell.

"You will." He told her, a gentle smile on his face. "We don't choose love, it finds us, and it will happen when you least expect it."

"Thank you." She spoke tiredly, laying back on her pillows, watching as Pietro moved her laptop over to the desk.

"Get some rest." He told her, covering her with the covers, placing a kiss to the top of her head. "We'll be downstairs if you need anything." With that, he left with a soft click of the door. Wanda closed her eyes, allowing herself to succumb to sleep.

The garden was full of laughter and children running around playing. Wanda soon stepped out into the yard, approaching the figure who was stood at the grill, two cold beers in her hand.

"Here." She handed them the beer, which they had taken thankfully. "How are the steaks?"

"Cooking nicely." They answered her, a smile on their face as they took a sip of beer. "The boys, hotdogs are ready for when they've worked up more of an appetite."

"Boys!" Wanda yelled, turning to face the two troublemakers, watching as they both froze in place. "Hotdogs are ready." She told them, grabbing the two plates and adding corn and some potato waffles for them.

"Yayyy!!" The twins squealed excitedly, grabbing their plates before heading over towards the table to settle down and eat. Wanda watched the two with a full heart, a bright smile on her face before she turned to Y/N.

Wanda jolted awake, her heart beating rapidly in her chest, glancing at the time and seeing it was a little after 1am. Getting herself out of bed, not really bothering about changing as she grabbed her shoes and coat, heading downstairs and running straight towards the exit. She had been having the same dream every night, but this time she recognised the other person with her.

She knew exactly what she had wanted, she knew exactly who she had wanted, after trying to deny her growing feelings for so long since that night. She had no idea how long it took her to walk to Y/N's, but she soon found herself stood on their front porch, her heart hammering against her rib cage as she knocked on the door. Soon hearing shuffling feet on the other side, followed by the sound of locks before the door opened.

"Wanda?" Y/N questioned, in shock that she was finally stood before them. "What are you doing here?"

"I just needed to see you." She told them, unaware of how Y/N's heart was racing too. "Can I come in?" She asked shyly, shuffling on her feet.

"Oh yeah, of course." They stepped aside, allowing the warmth of the house to wrap around her form. The door closed softly, the two stood their quietly before Y/N spoke up again. "Would you like a coffee?" They asked, gesturing towards the kitchen.

"Please." She whispered, soon following them further inside, she was looking around, seeing some changes to the decor. "Are you redecorating?" She asked as she leaned against the counter, watching as Y/N brewed up a fresh pot of coffee.

"I am." They answered, turning to face her. "I figured it was time for a change, especially since."

"I know." She spoke softly, noticing their swift change in demeanor, knowing they were thinking about Jean. "I uh, I should apologise." She started, ignoring Y/N trying to wave her off. "I shouldn't have disappeared the way I did, especially after you helped me."

"Hey." They spoke softly, stopping her ramble. "It's okay, I understand how hard it can be to be vulnerable with someone again, especially after everything." They poured out two cups, handing one to Wanda before holding their own between their hands. "I'll be honest, I have struggled with that myself, with letting someone else in since Jean was the last person to break down my walls." Wanda took a sip of her coffee, watching as Y/N looked inside their own cup. "That was until you came along."

"What?" Wanda whispered, her heart beating impossibly faster.

"I can't really explain it, but you made me feel something more again." They started nervously. "It's extremely easy to talk to you, I feel a comfort and safety with you that I haven't felt in a long time." They chuckled as they placed their cup down on the counter. "I have tried so hard as to not forget the love I had for Jean, or the love we shared, I actually gave up on love and happiness, because she was it for me." They chuckled lightly, their eyes soon finding Wanda's green ones. "That was until I met you."

"Y/N." Wanda whispered, Y/N shook their head.

"Please let me get this out." They pleaded, Wanda only nodded, her own cup lost on the counter. "I thought I was never going to feel anything again, but I feel something for you, and it goes deeper than I ever thought it would." They took a deep breath before continuing. "I don't exactly have words for how I feel right now, but I want to figure it out, if that is also something that you would want too."

"Yes." Wanda breathed out, tears in her eyes which Y/N had wasted no time in moving forward and wiping them away, but leaving their hands resting softly on her cheeks. "I want to explore what this is too, because I can't explain what it is that I feel either, but I have been having the same dream, over and over again, but it wasn't until just now that I have finally realised that it was you." She watched as a smile formed on their face. "It's you who my heart calls for."

"Can I kiss you?" They asked softly, looking deeply in her eyes, only finding comfort and certainty.

"Please." She breathed out, Y/N soon closed the gap, pressing their lips against hers softly, Wanda's hands held their wrists softly, smiling into the kiss, breaking it and Y/N rested their head against hers.

"Stay the night with me?" They asked her, watching as her eyes slowly opened and met their own.

"Of course." She agreed easily, Y/N took her hand, leading her up the stairs towards the master bedroom, the two soon lay down, Y/N wasted no time in wrapping their arms around her, holding her close as the two soon fell into a deep slumber.

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[hallufabrication]

It's a small world

A fic about various things I wanted to write about instead of rambling about them; focuses on Manta and Hannah. The whole thing is under the cut.

Manta didn’t expect his and Hannah’s connection to fizzle out the way it did.

Not that he was expecting anything specific; She wasn’t someone he would really consider a friend. At the same time, though, he couldn’t deny that they weren’t exactly strangers, either. They hung out sometimes, she tried to help him during his illegal race against Corto, and they bonded over how great they thought Teach tech was – something that left a bitter taste in his mouth now.

He would have expected some kind of a lukewarm goodbye, or an awkward wave as they stepped onto the boats meant to take them to their homes. But as the boat steering towards the Solar Sea took off, there was no exchange between them - in fact, he wasn’t even anywhere nearby, instead preparing for his and Shino’s attempt at getting a better life for themselves.

He did think then if he should have approached her outburst the day before the way he did. Back then, he didn’t see it as anything more than a show of weakness; she wouldn’t have lasted a day in what he had to live through on Polaris. Why should she get sympathy for being a double-crosser? For only feeling bad now that it was too late anyway, now that Gavinda’s plan was in full swing?

But it wasn’t too late. Not to her and the Tikis, anyway. And she did her part in fighting against Teach…

Unlike him, at first.

No, Hannah wasn’t weak. After everything, Manta could tell that much.

Maybe he shouldn’t have underestimated how cruel Teach could have been to her. Maybe that shouldn’t have been his last words to her.

“Oh well. Too bad”, he thought, going back to packing his stuff. What’s done is done.

He hasn’t really thought about this, or anything related to the Mirages, for the next few months. He had more important things on his mind - building a new life from scratch with Shino (and Debbie) on an entirely new island was challenging enough to take away any time he could have had for reminiscing about his old acquaintances from the Whale Cup.

They weren’t on his mind these few months later, as he was walking through one of the lesser known alleys of Tortuga to his boat, either - at least not until he saw a familiar looking silhouette walking through one of the streets he’d usually pass.

“Hannah?” He called out instinctively, more out of surprise than anything else.

“Oh– hi, Manta.” She replied, turning around to face him. “Been a while, huh?”

“Yeah, but– What are you doing here?”

“On Tortuga? I came for the Rotor Punch, obviously.” She shrugged. “But, I wanted to see how you’re doing with my own two eyes while I’m here, too.”

“You heard of me?” He asked, squinting his eyes.

“Duh. It’d be harder to not hear of the famous White Tiger, honestly.” She said, leaning on the wall next to her. “You’re taking Aquagram by storm– You know that, right?”

He shrugged and made an indecipherable hum. Debbie did tell him that he was getting more popular day by day, but he never really got interested in how popular he was outside of Tortuga, exactly. His winning streak mattered to him more than whatever she was doing over on her hologlove.

“Wait, but– Rotor Punch? You’re competing?”

“What, you think I can’t handle it?”

“It’s just– I didn’t know if you’d still be racing after… Everything.”

Hannah frowned for a short second, but quickly smirked instead.

“It takes more than that to make me quit, you know. I managed to get into Solar Empire’s drone guard.”

She crossed her arms, still leaning on the wall.

“So, I’m the one representing the Empire this year.”

“Oh, wow. You got yourself a solid position, huh?” He said, walking over and sitting down on the stairs next to her. “How’d you even do that?”

“Eh, turns out getting to the finals of the Whale Cup was good enough of an achievement to sign up. Only had to climb a few ranks after that.”

“Pshf, sounds easy.” He teased. She only hummed in response.

“What about Adam? Is he participating with you?”

A slight grimace showed up on Hannah’s face. Manta wasn’t sure how to decipher what emotion it was supposed to show.

“...No, he’s not. He hasn’t reached out to me after Teach’s defeat.”

“Oh.” Manta said. “...Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Hannah sighed, sitting next to him on the stairs.

“...I haven’t tried to reach him, either. At first I thought I should, since Teach manipulated him, too, but… He was always more invested in her plans than I was. It seems like we both picked our sides.”

“...I see.”

“Yeah.”

A moment of silence fell upon them.

“And you’re…not worried?”

Hannah glared at him for a few seconds before deciding on an answer.

“I… don’t know. I have mixed feelings about it all.” She stated, resting her chin on her hand.

“Teach was cruel to him, too. She’s not going to suddenly do a 180. But, if that was his choice, then–”

She suddenly waved with the same hand in the air, leaning back.

“--so be it! I’m not going to chase after someone who made up their mind!”

She let out something between a groan and a sigh, hiding her face with her hands for a moment.

“...What’s it to you, anyway? I didn’t take you for the type to talk about this kinda stuff.”

Manta shrugged, looking somewhere else.

“You were the one who said it’s been a while.”

“Heh– yeah, that’s true.” She chuckled. “I guess it did a number on you.”

“Hmm.”

They sat for a moment in silence before Hannah stood up from the stairs.

“...Well, I should go. I take it you’re taking part in the Rotor Punch too, right?”

“Of course. Who do you take me for?”

“Yeah, thought so.” She smirked again, turning back to go about her way.

“I’ll see you around, then. Just don’t expect me to go easy on you.”

“Psh, as if I’d need that. But yeah. See you around.” He replied, also getting up from the sidewalk.

As he got back to walking to his boat, he felt a sense of a relief he didn’t expect.

Turns out, he was sorta glad to see her again.

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

with a few minutes' reflection and a second conversation with my parents I have realized that I may have overblown things and overreacted a bit and also in some ways they're correct even if I think they're also harsh about it

[deva-arts]

You got isekai'd into SYSTEMA. What now.

Be amazed.

Remember I spawned into the "everything sucks" world.

Break down and cry.

Consider death as an escape.

Summon the global chaos by leaking insider secrets that could make about 200 new conspiracy theories.

Hope that Sera's conspirator ass tries to find me before one of the hits get me first.

Ending 1: I get sniped.

Ending 2: I get jumped.

Ending 3: I get kidnapped.

Ending 4:

Ending 200: It worked! Sera insults me. I cry from both the height she's holding me at and the insult respectively. She tells me to quit sobbing so I weep in incognito mode.

Make it into the Manumission. Wipe my face. Contemplate death again.

Get interrogated.

Get welcomed in! (I am still under close observation)

Quietly fangirl about my characters in 4k then feel incredibly weird about how much I know.

Get interrogated again.

I know that Nathaniel knows that I know but he doesn't know how much I know until I make it known that I know that he knows.

Consider death as- oh. He heard that too.

Literally everyone freaks me out for different reasons. I hang out with Sonia. She calls me fat. I still like you Sonia.

Live in the manumission under witness/informant protection and try not to die.

[faaun]

the way my heart sank . lol

[atomicami]

threesome with bfm!abby + her best friend sevika (aka me trying to make a crossover happen)

18+ only minors DNI

it honestly wasn’t planned, to say the least. before you left with your boyfriend to attend a friend’s birthday party, you had the courtesy of meeting his mother’s best friend, sevika.

“so this must be the not-so-lucky girlfriend, yeah?” she asks before turning her head to abby, to which she nods. “hey there, pretty girl. name’s sevika.” she says, offering her hand out to you.

you blush at the name she gives you and reach out to shake her hand. her palm had felt so large and warm in yours, almost like abby's, but maybe a little bit bigger. you let go of her hand, and you can't help but curiously look at her other arm, seeing that it’s entirely replaced with a metal prosthetic.

sevika catches your glance shifting and she looks down at her arm. "oh, this?" she says, looking back up at you. "i lost it about a decade ago, but i’m alright though. besides…” she pauses for a moment before continuing. “my other one still works just as good.” she says with a wink. you got the joke behind that, of course. but what you didn’t know was that you were going to be the one she’d use that hand on.

fast forward to now, and you’ve wound up in bed with two of the finest, most masculine women you could ever imagine yourself with. you’re trapped in between them, sitting in abby’s lap with your back against her chest while sevika was resting in between your legs and eating your pussy out in a painfully slow, yet rough manner.

“sevika, i said be gentle,” abby says from behind, gently caressing your breasts as she watches sevika’s movements. “i told you she’s sensitive.”

sevika grunts back at her, briefly removing her mouth off of your throbbing clit to speak to her. “where’s the fun in that, anderson?” she replies as she inserts a second finger into your soaked cunt, admiring how you squirmed and whined at her touch. “look at how much she likes it…pretty girl seems to be enjoying herself from the looks of it.”

while abby and sevika may present themselves in similar ways, you realize that they are both completely different in bed. abby was the gentle type, who’d always touch you and handle your body with care as if you were a porcelain doll that could shatter at any moment. sevika, on the other hand, was the opposite. she’s been manhandling the hell out of your thighs and pussy for the past ten minutes now, as if you had now turned into a ragdoll that could be easily thrown around the bed.

but if there’s one thing the two women have in common…it’s that making you cum was their number one priority.

“you okay, beautiful?” abby purrs into your ear, gently planting kisses on the back of your neck as sevika continued to finger your cunt. “is sevika taking good care of you?”

you nod with a whine, and while abby took that as a valid answer, sevika sure didn’t. her metal hand gripped your inner thigh harshly, causing you to jerk back at her. “answer her question, sweetheart.” she mused, her steel gray eyes staring you down.

“y-yes! please keep going sev…” you whine out to her. sevika hummed, bringing her gaze back down to your pussy. “such a pretty pussy, baby… it’s crazy how anderson’s kid can get to taste this whenever he wants.”

“yeah, about that…” abby chimes in, stifling a laugh. “it’s just me who does that. andrew always refuses to do it.”

sevika scoffed and shook her head in disbelief, her flesh fingers slowing down their movements inside you. “you’re fucking lying.” her eyes shift back to you. “she’s lying, right?”

you look down at sevika with a straight face, slowly shaking your head. “it’s true…h-he never does…”

sevika couldn’t help herself. she starts to laugh, still unable to wrap her head around it. “jesus, anderson, your kid is pretty stupid for that. who wouldn’t wanna get a taste of this gorgeous girl?” she leans in and licks another stripe up your pussy, letting out a groan as she savored the arousal that caught on her tastebuds. “she tastes like fucking heaven.”

“that’s exactly what i told her,” abby replied. “but what can i say? he gets his self-absorption from his father, and i sure can’t fix his stupidity either.”

you whined as your pussy clenched tightly around sevika’s fingers. it felt insane to think about it, but the fact that abby and sevika were talking shit about your boyfriend like this couldn’t help but turn you on even more.

however, sevika was quick to feel your actions as her gaze drops back down to your pussy. “did you just clench around me?” she asks, looking back up at you. her fingers began to speed up a little now, causing a whimper to escape from your throat as you clutch onto abby’s bicep. “seems like she’s getting off on hearing us talk shit about her useless boyfriend.”

abby chuckles, leaning in to press a kiss on your cheek. “it’s because she knows it’s true. besides, she’s got two women right here who’s gonna give her all the pleasure her body needs tonight.”

sevika smirks, spreading your thighs out farther for her. “in that case, you better buckle up, princess…because we’re just getting started.”

yeah so anyways…i kinda want to make a full fic of this…should i make a full fic of this??

[gffa]

One thing that caught my attention while watching The Phantom Menace in the theater, a movie I didn't expect to find anything new with after how many times I've seen it and analyzed it, was that Sidious mentions multiple times that he has to change his plans to fit the new circumstances. It got me to thinking about how Palpatine gets credit for his carefully crafted plans, but often times not for how flexible he is in changing them on the fly, especially in time travel fics where someone destroys one of his plans and that's the end of it. Which, I'm not advocating against, I love a good Take That Wrinkled Walnut The Fuck Down However You Gotta Do It fic and I don't want them to change! But in canon Palpatine makes note of things he's not expecting, like:

When Valorum sends the Jedi as ambassadors, it's not part of Sidious' plan: DAULTAY DOFINE: This scheme of yours has failed, Lord Sidious. The blockade is finished. We dare not go against the Jedi. DARTH SIDIOUS: Viceroy, I don't want this stunted slime in my sight again! This turn of events is unfortunate. We must accelerate our plans. Begin landing your troops. NUTE GUNRAY: My lord, is that… legal? DARTH SIDIOUS: I will make it legal. NUTE GUNRAY: And the Jedi? DARTH SIDIOUS: The Chancellor should never have brought them into this. Kill them immediately!

On the Trade Federation ship, after Queen Amidala has disappeared from Naboo, Palpatine originally planned that she would be forced to sign the treaty, and then brings in Maul to deal with this. DARTH SIDIOUS: And Queen Amidala, has she signed the treaty? NUTE GUNRAY: She has disappeared, My Lord. One Naboo cruiser got pat the blockade. DARTH SIDIOUS: I want that treaty signed. NUTE GUNRAY: My Lord, it's impossible to locate the ship. It's out of our range. DARTH SIDIOUS: Not for a Sith. This is my apprentice. Darth Maul. He will find your lost ship.

On Naboo, after Padme allies with the Gungans: NUTE GUNRAY: We've sent out patrols. We've already located their starship in the swamp....It won't be long, My Lord. DARTH SIDIOUS: This is an unexpected move for her. It's too aggressive. Lord Maul, be mindful. MAUL: Yes, my Master. DARTH SIDIOUS: Be patient... Let them make the first move.

Palpatine's plans aren't static, they adapt and change with the events that happen, just as the other characters react to new information and head in new directions for it, so too does Palpatine and I think it's interesting to note that part of what makes him such a good villain is that he has an outline for what he wants to do, he sets up the dominoes of what he needs, but even when they don't fall precisely into place, he generally gets what he wants. He originally intended that Padme would sign the treaty, the Jedi wouldn't be involved, and that would lead to a vote of No Confidence to oust Valorum, using the sympathy for Naboo as a way to boost himself into the position. But he didn't really need her to sign it and still managed to use the sympathy for Naboo to get elected, it ultimately didn't matter what happened to the planet, so long as it was in danger while he needed it to be, he could use it either way. Nor, honestly, do I think he ever planned for Anakin Skywalker's existence, he had no idea they would find such a boy on Tatooine or how useful he was going to be, that was another way he changed his plans once the opportunity arose. Or a lot of his plots in TCW--he has Cad Bane steal the list of Force-sensitive children and kidnap them, bringing them to Mustafar for some sort of program to use them probably not too unlike how he uses the Inquisitors later. That plan is foiled by the Jedi, the babies are returned to their families, and Sidious' plans fall through, but that doesn't really change the outcome. tl:dr: I don't think Palpatine gets enough credit as a villain whose plans shift and change along with the new events that happen, just as much as the heroes' plans shift and change when new things happen. Yeah, he's a great villain because he creates an impossible trap for people, but also because the thing about him is that he's incredibly charming and charismatic and he knows an opportunity when he sees one, that any one given plan might fall through, but it's not necessary to his overall plot.

[hazelfoureyes]

Alastor in Rut (one shot)

Rutting Alastor x Fem Rabbit Reader

Less than confident and lacking much in the way of assertiveness, you find hell to be scary. But, a very kind and helpful deer demon has a solution! Just in time, as an unexpected rut hits him and he feels the need to reel you in.

this is pure self indulgence. Shout out to @jazzmasternot , @lustylita , @sugoi-writes , and @minkdelovely for keeping me sane and horny (with art lol)

「Warnings/Promises: actual warning - mentions of accidental vehicular homicide and reader's death, Marathon Smut, p in v, finger almost in a?, anal is considered, knotting because fuck it, attempt at breeding, womb flooded, not dubcon but everyone in the hotel thinks it is, slightly repetitive fucking because he wont waste semen on other holes, Alastor would fuck anyone but you’re the most amusing, Alastor doesn’t think he’s the good guy which is honestly kinda cute, deadass talk about making you carry his fawns?? Why is it so hot?? Knock me up deer man bleat bleat bitch, implied previous relationship with a human man, plans to cuckold your ex, heat, blue fire isn’t hot, you’re tricked into a deal with Alastor, kinda size kink, demon Alastor, minor aftercare, a little sexual choking (as a treat)」

Hey--- we're all here for something. This is 10000 words, 5300 or so is smut. Smut starts at the bright green divider for you impatient and horny deeries.

MINORS YOU KNOW THE DRILL DNI

The line for reception was long, but that was to be expected. After the extermination ended early and Adam killed on television by a maid, the Hazbin Hotel had been busy. Or so you overheard others saying. You’d only been in hell a day, lucky enough to catch the advertisements and hear the gossip for the hotel soon after your descent.

You recognized the princess immediately, but not that tall man beside her. He wasn’t doing anything, just staring and smiling. Was he friendly? Were there friendly people in hell? Truly friendly. Not high school girl friendly. Or hungry witch friendly. He had witch vibes.

“Hiya welcome to the”, she took a deep breath in, “Hazbin Hotel! I am Charlie! This is Alastor! What did you do to bring you to hell? Gotta know so we can cater your redemption activities to your sins!”

She was staring at you so happily, pen over paper. Your eyes nervously shot to the man, who leaned down in response.

“I fell asleep driving and killed someone, and myself.”

Everything about Charlie was frozen still except the sudden glossiness forming over her eyes. “You… you… were you like, a thief or… did you…… push old ladies into traffic?”

You shook your head no.

“Gluttonous? She asked.

“No, I wasn’t a fan of overindulgence.”

“Prideful, then?” 

“Unfortunately… I don’t think too highly of myself. Living or dead.” Your hand came to your down turned rabbit ears, sad and limp. Even in death you weren’t the right kind of anything.

“Uhh,” Charlie clicked her pen furiously again and again, “Lustful?”

“Just the one partner. My highschool sweetheart.”

A sweat was forming on Charlie’s brow, “Sloth?”

“I did fall asleep behind the wheel… but it was from working 25 hours of overtime this week.”

Charlie put the pen down, “I don’t think you belong in hell. You made an accident. That’s not how sins should work…”

Your eyes bore holes into the desk, avoiding eye contact, “I don’t think heaven cares much about that.”

“Poor thing. Let’s circle back, Charlie.” Alastor’s large hand rested on your head, patting twice. 

She nodded, “Good call. I’ll just,” her tongue stuck out as she began to write, “make a new category just for you! Other.”

Yeah that made sense, you thought. That was fitting. This truly was hell. Finally you stood out, as the one who didn’t fit in. You supposed that’s what a wallflower deserved for murder. 

“Follow me little one.”  The tall Alastor instructed you as he snatched a key from the hook and walked past you.

Happily. Small tail uncontrollably swishing as you followed a foot behind him.

A hum of approval, Alastor noticing the distance you kept.

“You obey instructions well.”

You always did. “Thank you.” Tiny and soft, your response made his shadow shift and smile.

It wasn’t a compliment, but the fact you took it as one interested him. Subservient. 

Fun. 

“I take it that you really were a good girl in life, weren’t you?” He swiveled on his heels to face you, the sudden change causing your face to run into his lower chest.

A song of apologies fell from your mouth as you backed up, tripping over your own pathetic attempts at platitude and falling back onto your ass.

He was tall before but now he towered over your, hand outstretched to help you up. You offered a thank you before taking it.

Clawed fingers tightened around your palm. Not letting you pull away. “You’re new to hell, right?”

A glance around, no one else in the hallway, “Is it obvious?”

“Yes. But also, you mentioned work this week.”

A nod, “It’s been maybe a day.”

Delicious.

“Could I offer you some advice?” He leaned down, hand tightening further. Wide eyed and a little frightened with the change in atmosphere, you just nodded again. “It’s very dangerous out there for little prey animals like yourself.”

“Aren’t you also a prey animal?”

His hand uncurled.

A moment of tension, Alastor leaning down further.

A strange sound was coming from his microphone, the best approximation you had was a car radio going haywire skipping through the channels.

“Room 243!” His body popped up and he held the key out for you. The hallway lights seemed to be glowing brighter now.

You grabbed the key, “Thank you!”

Two fourty three was just past him. A small tremble kept you from getting the key in on your first and even second try. 

You didn’t even stop to turn on the light, just pushing the door closed behind you as soon as your body was through the threshold.

The relief barely left with a sigh when you heard it, “You know…”

Frozen, your eyes adjusted to the darkness enough to see the shining of his red and pink eyes in front of you.

“I’m somewhat of a deal maker. For a small price, I could help you. Perhaps, you’d like a change of appearance?” His voice seemed to be coming from the walls, above and beside you all at once.

Something lifted a floppy ear. But his eyes were too far from you for it to have been his own hands. A small scream as you smacked at the appendage.

“What do you say? I can use a little magic to make you happier with your new form.” A dark whisper into your right ear. 

Your hands flew to your head before you dropped to your knees to escape the hidden things touching you. 

“What do you want?” To your left now. “Let’s make a trade. A deal.” Above your head. 

His eyes were gone. Just darkness and a soft laugh echoing around you.

Your mind was reeling through possible answers, what did you want? At that moment? In general? 

An answer tumbled out, too quietly.

“Hmm?” His eyes reappeared closer to you and glowing a bloody red. “Speak up, my ears are quite a bit higher than your mouth.”

A second attempt, “Safety. I wanna be safe.” The laughter got louder, mocking you without words.

“A little tougher of an ask.” The sound of something slithering near your feet made you pull your knees tighter to your chest. “But! I’m here to please. In exchange for protection from the more nefarious of hell’s citizens I’ll need something worth my while.”

Of course, that is how deals work, right? A promise with compensation. 

“I don’t have any money, or possessions yet. Maybe I should try again later?” You were lost in the light of his stare and found the darkness deepening around him.

A considered hum, “Well, you’re already dead. You’ve no need for your soul. Damned as it is, give it to me instead. To keep safe. And I’ll always answer your calls for rescue when in harm's way.”

Why would…what use was a soul, you wondered. Was he right? But if he wanted it, surely it had value. You were too new to this world, scared to say yes and part with what little you had. 

At the risk of angering the demon in the darkness of your room, you whispered to yourself and hoped he would hear it, “I think I shouldn’t.”

Hissing in your ear, “Disappointing.”

The lights flickered on, an empty room. A bed. A nightstand. A closet. A bathroom. No tall smiling dealmaker.

A tremor stayed in your hands through the night. 

To your surprise, when you ran into Alastor the next day he was more than kind. He was eavesdropping when you asked Charlie if the hotel needed any staff. Not only did you want to be of use, you were hoping to earn some money. He quickly slid beside Charlie suggesting things you could do. 

Wow, you thought. He didn’t hold a grudge at all. Maybe he had been trying to help before? 

It took a few weeks, but you found a groove. You were a floater between the staff, helping Husk with the restocking of his bar, following behind Niffty with supplies her tiny arms couldn’t carry, and keeping notes for the activities Charlie held. It was vital for you to feel needed and everyone seemed happy to have you around. Hell wasn’t so bad.

“Dear,” Alastor found you holding a basket of towels in the hallway on a rather standard weekday, “I need an errand runner. Do you mind?”

You had been finding Alastor’s presence enjoyable, a little secret you held. He was always smiling, which made you smile in turn. And his manners, well, perfect. You couldn’t understand why such a sweet man was in hell, but then you considered you were also in hell. Mistakes happen, perhaps he was also damned by technicalities. 

Not that you would ask him, you barely spoke a word to the deer demon. Every time he was around you your throat would close up. Oftentimes you would pull your hands behind your back to shield the wiggle of your too-honest tail. 

When he would speak to you, you would get so focused on the sound of his voice and watching his mouth move you’d actually not hear a damn thing he said. You must have looked like an absolute airhead, always replying, “What?” every time he finished a statement. 

“Hellooo, anyone home in there?” He knocked gently on your skull. Ah, those big hands again. He watched the pink bloom across your cheeks, your hands coming to your ears to pull them down as your mind wandered off.  A snap of his fingers finally brought you back.

“Sorry, what?” Your eyes were bright as you finally made the journey all the way up to his face.

“Welcome back. I need some stuff picked up from a shop downtown. I can’t leave right now, mind hopping over for me?” The grin he offered you made you melt.

“Of course!” That damn tail shaking behind you, “What am I picking up?”

He waved his hand, “Not important, it’ll be all wrapped up and waiting.” The radio effect of his voice grew, “I’ll write down the address.”

Terrible handwriting. You could barely read it, but didn’t want to insult him so you just nodded as he followed you to the doors. Pausing, you realized it was your first time leaving the hotel alone. 

“What’s wrong? Not up to it?”

You shook your head, “No! I can do it. Thank you.”

A pounding in your chest made you question if you were actually dead. But despite your concerns, no one bothered you beyond some catcalling and intense glares. Staring at the paper, you struggled to decipher the address. Was that a 7 or a 1? A 4 or a 9…? You were in the general area, the street name lined up and the first couple numbers of the address too.

You brought the paper closer to your face, maybe if you really inspected it you could figure it out. 

A shriek, dropping the paper to felt a small goblin-like creature pushing at your knees. Another, then another, began to appear from the shadows of the street. Black and white little creatures pushing and pulling at your legs until you tumbled over.

“Help!” You thought it was a shout, but it came out as a soft spoken request, the tone itself adding a ‘please’ to the end. 

They weren’t hurting you, just knocking you over every time you tried to stand up like grade school bullies. You managed, the creatures relenting momentarily before a stockier one materialized. A step back, what did they want? Money? You pulled out your wallet and opened it but the large one smacked it to the ground. 

That quick heart skipped a beat when your back hit against something solid. As your head bent backwards, you could see those red and pink eyes looming over you. 

“Oh dear. Trouble already?” 

You could cry. You did cry, a little, at the sight of a familiar face. With a flourish of his hands, those previously unseen tendrils whipped from his back and flung the aimless attackers away. 

Rescue! You hugged his waist, a chorus of ‘thank yous’ and ‘Oh, Alastor!’ into his chest. 

“Now now, can’t even be a proper task rabbit. You really do need some safeguarding.” He peeled you off him, brushing his coat off. Your mind thought back to the offer. “And I don’t see my purchase… didn’t complete the task either?”

You shrunk, you’d entirely failed him. His smirk was one sided, eyes half lidded and expression dramatically disappointed. Alastor sighed and turned to walk away from you. You’d let him down. He’d been nothing but accommodating and gentle.

“I’m sorry! Alastor!” You grabbed his wrist, eyes shut so you didn’t see the green glow of arcane symbols floating up around him. “Can I please have that deal? Please. I’m sorry, you have my soul as payment.”

Painless, selling your soul. With a handshake, a little light show, and a whirling of magic, you had done it.

“Excellent choice!” Alastor patted your head, “I’ll come to your aid when you’re scared for your life! Aaaand in return, your soul is mine. Easy peasy, yes?”

Fine, not an issue in the slightest. “Do I need to do anything?”

“About what?” His eyes wandered to inspect his fingernails.

“My soul.”

A barking laugh, “No. You’re tied to me now, dear. As for my end, just call my name when you’re in danger and I’ll,” a flourish of his talons, “rescue you.” His smile strained as he peered down at your little face, “Why are you crying?”

“I’m so happy to have the help, thank you Alastor! You really are just, amazing. Your mother raised you right.” Your hands were holding your cheeks, grateful and feeling a little less alone.

The mention of his mother made his back straighten, a bloom in his chest he knew all too well to be pride. Finally, someone was vocalizing his better qualities. Well, other than Charlie. But impressing Charlie was like making a dog think you’d thrown a ball. Just a little quick whirl of your hands and a couple sweet words with a smile and she’d be all wagging tail as she ran to retrieve nothing. 

But he supposed you were very much like Charlie, easily tricked and distracted. Had you really not noticed those goons were his? Or that the address wasn’t real? Were you stupid or naive? His head fell to the side unnaturally as he watched you talk. He wasn’t listening, though. He took in your features, slight but average. His hand came out absentmindedly and felt at one of your long and limp ears. He didn’t see you blush or caught how you stiffened. 

Naive. Terribly naive.

Perfectly usable. 

He dropped your ear and turned to leave. “I won’t rescue you twice in one day. Best to follow me home if you value your life.”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

You hadn’t told anyone about the deal, a secret for yourself to keep. Partly because you were embarrassed you needed the help, and partly because you had been warned extensively to not make a deal with the deer demon. Everyone had such a peculiar idea of Alastor, it seemed to you. Even after making a deal, he was still…Alastor. Always offering a joke, or playing something jaunty in the shared spaces. You could vent and whine and Alastor would hum as he read. Always offering a gentle pat to the head when you were sad or did something he liked. 

So when Alastor suddenly left the group in a sweat, hands shaking and body rocking slightly side to side, you were quick to follow behind him. He bumped off the walls a couple of times before making it to his room and falling forward past the threshold. 

You waited for the door to close before running down the hall and knocking. 

“Are you alright?” You pressed your cheek against the wood and listened for any reply. 

Alastor was still on the floor when you knocked, which worked out well. He leaned against the door, ears flat with his condition. He took a deep breath, voice dropping an octave and carrying easily to you, “Just— an out of season rut. Unexpected and unwelcome. Without any does nearby it’s quite odd.”

“Oh, are deer not like rabbits? Rabbit does are always in estrus! Mating actually triggers their ovulation. Neat, huh?” Silence, Alastor’s ears turned forward focusing on every other word.

Does, always, oestrus

Mating, triggers, ovulation 

“I had pet rabbits when I was little. Isn’t that funny though? That they’re also called does.” You worried he thought you were weirdly interested in rabbit sex. “We had them as pets. So….,” a silence you misinterpreted as awkward.

Alastor tapped a long claw on the door before dragging it down the wood. A line was etched behind, “Is that so?”

You knelt down to get comfortable, “How long will it last?”

“Ah, hard to say. I've only suffered through a few. Alone, perhaps a week.”

“That sounds terrible.”

“With an appropriate partner, a deer demon would rut for two days. One for mating with his doe, one for guarding his doe from rivals who could still interfere with conception.”

His doe. You both found your throat running dry at the words. 

You nodded, “Oh wow, I guess that’s why you always see bucks locked together in fights.”

“Precisely.”

“But...can sinners actually conceive?” You gulped, the idea was a little naughty to you. The entire conversation was actually making you uncomfortable. The kind of discomfort that made your breath pick up. The kind of discomfort that shifted to hunger with just a few words or a well placed look.

“No, but that doesn’t matter. Once fully in the hold of a rut or heat, demons aren’t motivated by logic.”

You nodded again, forgetting he couldn’t see you. “Oh okay…” the idea of Alastor rutting into his own hand desperate to fill a womb made your knees come together. “Must be hard for you. As an asexual.”

A hum, confusion breaking his creeping fog for a second, “A sexual what?”

“Nevermind.” You shook your head, shaking off the topic with the motion.

Alastor could smell your arousal wafting under the door. A feverish chill ran through him, drawing the fog back into the recesses of his mind.

“Well… I’ll let you rest. I know you can’t call me, so I’ll stop by to see if you need anything.”

His mouth opened to correct you— he could call you in a sense, and he didn’t need help as he had minions he could summon with a snap. 

“That sounds lovely, what a helpful thing you are.” The words came out strained, his jaw tensing. How much longer could he hold out? The thinnest lie held in place that he’d suffer alone through the week. Already compromised by his errant shadow, flat against the carpet beneath your thighs. 

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

Within hours Alastor was lying on the floor with his limbs splayed out. The sweating was the worst, not the heat. He could feel ticklish drops dripping down his stomach. His hair was sticking to his face, adding to the mounting overstimulation. Wet, hot, clothes clinging to his body like a second skin. A clawed hand pulled off his bow tie. His fingers shook too much to handle the tiny buttons of his shirt so he gave up and ripped it open. 

It fell into a pile with the bow tie and soon his pants and socks joined. Sitting up on his elbows he looked down at his underwear, he wasn’t hard yet but he knew the smallest touch could trigger what could be days of painfully swollen erections.

He fell back to the floor with a huff, hands raking through his hair and gripping his ears a little rougher than he’d meant to. A gasp, red tipped talons feeling down his ears and slipping around his already growing antlers.

Alastor’s eyes rolled back, strong hands squeezing his prongs, tugging them forward as he imagined anyone riding him. Using his appendages as a handle while he bucked up into them. His hips were already moving, lower back rising off the carpet as he rolled his body up into the imaginary mate he despised his desperation for. His mind flicked through faces. Husk’s pained but satisfied expression, Vox’s tears as he whined, Carmilla’s lusty eyes paired with surrendered sighs. He lingered briefly on Angel’s smirk as his hands roamed down his chest and his thighs in tandem. 

But through the darkness of his imagination he saw two watery and timid orbs, tears welling as eyebrows rose in confusion. Pleasure making the features soften. Soft. Soft velvet ears he could tug on in turn, a little bushy tail he could grip. 

A doe. 

The only doe he knew of in the hotel. 

The radio on the writing desk flipped through channels, piecing together the sounds to form the words he was trying to forget, a magazine ransom note cut from sound bites.

....out the windows

 ....always and forever, 

....in yesterday. 

....rusty cage 

May you never....

Hating how I....

....pull the trigger

....say you love me?

....congratulations 

The relevant sounds spiked in volume, mocking him. 

He walked to the radio and hurled it across the room. Aggression. Already he was losing himself to hellish biology. 

A minor part of him didn’t want to use you. You always looked at him with such adoration, which he’d come to look forward to when others weren’t giving him adequate attention. You also seemed to genuinely see him as a friend, as much as he didn’t directly feed that idea.

But using people was how the world worked. Everyone was using someone. You had said how much you wanted to help… Alastor leaned on the desk with both hands and watched the sweat fall onto the wood and leather writing surface.

How was his body leaking from every pore but his mouth was so dry?

His shadow reached for the thrown radio, the light flickering on. That dark doppelgänger using a song to offer another piece of torment for him, ‘you ain't never caught a rabbit and you ain't no friend of mine.’

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

You had been speaking to Husk about what you could do to help prepare the bar for the weekend when a green light began to form around your neck. 

“Did you— Did you make a deal with him?!” Husk dropped the dish rag, hands shooting to your shoulders, “Hold on! I’ll— fucking hell. Fuck!”

“Wait what’s wro-,” you were standing inside an unfamiliar room, just at the door, before you could figure out why Husk was panicking. Looking up, you locked eyes with Alastor. The room was dark, curtains drawn shut and ceiling lights off. A slight glow from a roaring blue fire to your left. His eyes were those familiar glowing red orbs in the darkness of his large canopy bed. “Oh, Alastor.” You finally noticed the third light source. A neon green large linked chain was wrapped around his fist. Following the squared interlocking pieces down the length of the bed, across the carpet and up as you looked down to find it ending on you.

Your hands touched your neck, feeling the cold metal of your collar. 

Alastor took a deep breath in, a shaky exhale following.

Oh. You’d heard from Angel how his deal with his boss often materialized as a series of smoke rings linked and attached to him. 

Before you could question it any further you were sliding across the floor, hands and feet struggling to find purchase as he reeled you toward the bed. Alastor lifted you by the glowing chain around your neck, evidence of the deal you so easily accepted.

“Can a deer breed a rabbit?” He mused, breath ragged as he struggled to remain in control of his impulses, “Doubtful. But I’ll give it my sincerest efforts, regardless.”

“Alastor-! You don’t want to do this, it’s just your rut.” You pulled back, legs kicking and piling up the blankets. It was fruitless. 

He laughed, incorporeal radio studio audience joining along. You couldn’t stop from glancing at the straining fabric of his black boxers. Setting a small hand on his chest to better attempt to push away you gasped, “You’re burning up!” The fear of the moment left you entirely, replaced with deep concern. 

He gripped your wrist with his free hand, not letting go of the chain in his right, “The fever is unbearable. My mind is slipping away.”

“Is this normal?!” Your hands came to his cheeks, his forehead, his neck. You remembered how your grandmother always checked your temperature, and pressed your lips to his sweat slicked brow. “You poor thing…”

When you pulled back you were met with the bright and blown out pupils of Alastor’s gaze. He was staring at your mouth, the green of his magical connection to you reflecting off his glossy eyes.

“Poor me.” He’d been sitting with loosely crossed legs but got on his knees. His face rose until he was looking down at you, hand now holding your chin, “You promised to help me.”

Your eyes were looking everywhere but his face. 

His hand on you tightened, cheeks squished together as he pulled your head up, “Are you a liar?” Of course not. His hand made your head shake left to right.

The trembling of your hands was obvious to you both. A cruel laugh, “Do I scare you, little bunny rabbit?”

In life you weren’t popular. No one hated you, but, well, you never had much luck attracting the men all the women seemed to want. No one of power or consequence ever paid you any mind.

Alastor was scary. But were you scared? Someone strong wanted you. Someone people feared was saying you were good enough for them.

Tears welled in your eyes as you felt your tail wiggling side to side. Your body always betrayed you. Your own death had been the doing of your body’s inability to listen to you. 

He couldn’t see the tail but the way your face screwed up in shame tipped him off. Letting go of your face, super heated finger pads slipped down your back. He slotted your tail between two fingers. There was no reason for it to be such an intimate action, but your entire body trembled.

Another deep sigh from Alastor, closing his fingers around the base and pulling gently. A test. Your head dropped to hide your reaction.

“Ah ah, eyes on me.”

He hummed happily as you did as you were told.

But the moment was cut short, you jumping when a rough knock came to the door.

“Alastor!” Vaggie was turning the knob despite knowing it was locked, “Is she in there? Open the fucking door.” A kick, a threat, “Now.”

“I’ll need your answer.” He leaned back onto the pillows piled behind him. Making a point, he lifted your chain and dropped it. It dissolved into nothingness before it could hit the bed.

“I’m here!” You said barely loud enough to be heard through the wooden door. Your eyes were drawn to Alastor’s lap as he pushed down his underwear to free his deep red cock.

His hand tenderly touched his base, hissing with the contact.

“For fuck’s sake Alastor!” Vaggie yelled, “You have three seconds to open this fucking door before I rip it off the hinges.”

Alastor’s head fell back with a moan, stifled as he bit down on his lip. 

“One!”

As his fingers slid up his length and touched his leaking slit his entire body violently shook.

“Two!”

He opened his eyes just barely. You hadn’t noticed the antlers on his head were quite a few times larger than normal. 

“I’m okay!” You shouted, the loudest noise you’d made since your death, but not the loudest you’d make by the end of the day.

Silence.

Mumbling.

 Vaggie spoke up again, “Are you sure? Come out and talk to us first.”

His hand began stroking himself, precum spilling down. Something soft and fuzzy was settling over the front of your brain.

You scooted backwards off the bed, eyes staying on his lap. The light color of his inner thighs. The little bit of red and black tail you could see squished down under his ass.

“Hello!” You opened the door just enough to shove your head through. “Hi there gang.”

Husk’s arms were crossed and his foot tapping, “Are you really okay? No matter the deal he can’t fucking make you stay in there with him.”

While you weren’t sure that was actually true, it wasn’t an issue, “I wanna stay! He needs someone to watch his fever and-,”

A brief rush of cool air up your shirt before a hot mouth was pressing into the small of your back.

Vaggie’s eyes narrows, “and?”

“And! And. Yes.” Your eyes shut, “and take care of cleaning up after him.”

They shared a glance, “He can just make his little creatures do it.”

A surprisingly long tongue ran up your spine.

“Oh my god.”

“What?”

“Oh my god! No! I couldn’t let my friend,” you sucked your bottom lip in as his hands wrapped around your waist and undid the button of your pants, “rely on strangers.”

Husk sighed, “Alright, just… like, call us or something? If you need anything.”

You began to nod but the door was shut and locked by Alastor before you could reply.

₊✧˚﹕︶︶︶﹕૮₍ ⸝⸝´ ꒳ `⸝⸝ ₎ა﹕︶︶︶﹕ ˚✧₊

Your face hit the wall as you lost balance when he pulled down your pants and panties with one yank and buried his face into your crotch. His tongue licked at the wetness pooled at your entrance.

Any moans would probably still have been heard by the other two so you tried to keep quiet. Alastor didn’t seem to care though, growling into your skin.

The fever seemed it would spread skin to skin, but when he pulled away you found your body quickly cooling. Taking a moment to breath before turning back, you wondered if you’d made a great decision or a terrible one. When you turned, Alastor was settling back into his previous spot. “I could rip the rest off of you or you could undress yourself.” He wasn’t looking at you as he said it. You made quick work of removing your shirt and returning to the bed as you had before.

"Turn around."

You turned to face the door.

"On your hands and knees."

You paused briefly, but did so.

As you bent over, little tail high and trembling, Alastor’s clawed thumbs spread open your bottom lips. Perhaps it was embarrassment or just the nerves but you were twitching open and close.

You heard a low “Fuck” before the feeling of heat dripping onto you made you jerk forward. One of his hands came to your shoulder to hold you in place, the other kept your hole open as his seed continued to dribble down onto it.

He hadn’t been trying to cum, but his body was already responding to the opportunity before it; a breedable and submissive doe.  His cock trigger-happy at the sight of your pussy, inside pink and clenching.

A tiny yelp as he fell over you, joining you in an all fours position but larger body caging yours between his limbs. He laughed again when the back of your head hit him square in the chest. 

“You are uselessly small.” His body rumbled over you. “Clever girl to make a deal for protection.” 

A burning stiffness slid down your folds. You could feel from even how little contact he made he was too big. Was it a bad time to tell him you’d only had the one partner on earth? A rather boring but sufficient sex life. If Alastor was hoping for a sex kitten he’d be deeply disappointed in you.

He hummed imagining dropping his weight and feeling you fruitlessly squirm under him. 

“Mating triggers ovulation, I recall you said. I just need to fuck you into it, right sweetheart? Maybe if I do a good enough job,” his hands gripped the flesh of your ass, “your body will actually respond. Your belly will swell with the evidence of my virility.” Both hands slipped down your hips and came to nestle above your womb, tenderly caressing the protective layer of fat there, “could your little form handle it?” Little form? Not quite. But to him everyone was little. Claws leaving faint red marks as he dragged them up your ribs, around your sides and pressed your back down to get your chest into the bed and ass in the air.

A squeak, your legs flailing with what little motion they had as you turned your head, “Well that’s for actual rabbits not--.”

His hand came over your mouth, “Shhh, there's safety in the quiet. Don’t you know? We’re most vulnerable when we mate.” On the utterance of the word you’d been avoiding to even think about Alastor’s still hard cock squeezed its way into you. Your body was willing, but your pussy wasn’t ready to accommodate him. Not that your living partner had been small, but he wasn’t a seven foot tall rutting deer demon. And with height came a girth and length you’d not anticipated. You had seen it, yes, but that didn’t translate to much once Alastor was entering you.

His hips were snapping back as soon as he sank in. It frustrated him endlessly that he wasn’t trying to fuck you with such a lack of control. He couldn’t have been sure he’d have done it any differently had the circumstances been changed, but he liked to think he’d  retained some skills over the long years alone.

The way he whined made him sound like a weak man, which he was in that moment. You wanted to call out his name, do the things you were used to doing during sex, but his hand was still over your mouth.

As if he heard your thoughts, his fingers spread open over your lips. Pinky under your chin to keep his hold on you. 

“Alastor,” the tenor of your voice surprised you.

“Stick out your tongue.” He sounded far away, despite being right behind you. When you did as he instructed his hand shifted. Two long fingers went into your mouth and pressed down on your tongue. Immediately his fingers and your chin was dripping with drool. He whined again, louder, the noise growing into a growl as his speed began to pick up. 

You could feel the thin flesh at the bottom of your entrance stinging as it was failing to stretch enough for him. It would have bothered you more but the way his burningly hot cock's head was pressing into your cervix was making your eyes lose focus. 

Without ceremony, you felt a rush of heat deep in you. Your shins lifted from the bed as you squirmed, weak attempts to escape the deep press.

His hand left your mouth and you felt it working on the base of his cock that was not yet in you. He mumbled something, it sounded like an apology, before you felt him pop the rest of himself in. You choked on your scream, not knowing what he had put in you. 

It throbbed, new and stronger spurts of his seed felt against an indescribable place. 

A brave hand reached between your thighs and felt at the space between your bodies—- well, would have felt at that space. But there was none. You were flush against his lap. Your fingers slid down to feel taut balls pulled up into his body. 

He shivered as you traced between them, checking neither were …  inside you. 

“I should have warned you, but my ability to speak wasn’t—,” he waved his hand around, “available.” You tried to pull away but found you both were locked together. “A knot. Not an accurate representation of a deer… and technically useless.”

That word meant nothing to you. “Is it normal?”

His thumb pressed at the virgin tight ring of muscle just above your pussy, you instinctively jerked away but just made yourself gasp as that large knot in you threatened to further tear you if you kept it up. “I don’t normally do it so early in a mated rut.”

You surrendered, trying to relax your upper body into the bed. “How do we get it out?”

A mocking chuckle, “It’ll deflate, so to speak, in a couple minutes. It’s just keeping my little doe in place while I finish filling her up.” He patted your ass. 

It was mortifying to be suck in that position.

“Have you ever used this hole?” He rubbed some of your wetness up to your asshole. 

 Your tail lifted, “My boyfriend didn’t like anal.”

Alastor massaged around the puckered ring, “I didn’t ask if he used his.” Your head turned to look at him, shaking it ‘no’. You noticed his face looked less strained now, and that his finger didn’t feel like a fire was just under his skin. “Ah, well. I won’t need it today anyway.”

He didn’t see the bright blush that came over your face. He spoke so easily about the topic, a topic you’d never heard him speak on before. One you’d been told he had no interest in.

An error you made, assuming a lack of interest meant a lack of knowledge or experience. 

When he finally could pull himself out of you, you felt a rush of warmth down your inner thighs. Looking under you, past your chest and between your legs, you saw the thick white semen escaping from your stretched entrance. 

You’d never seen such an opaque release before. You wondered if it was a hint at his…potency. You wondered more what was happening in your body at that moment. 

“Will it come out on its own or do I need to clean it?” Finally sitting up, your fingers felt the mess still dripping out of you. 

Alastor leaned back onto his legs, ears turning in your direction as you asked, “Is this your first time? Your little boyfriend never finished in you?”

Crossing your arms, you turned to him, “Don’t be patronizing to him. And no, okay?”

He felt the heat rising from his gut again, cock twitching at every bit of the scene before him. Insolent body language, an attempt to scold him, and an admission. You watched him sit back up, a sudden reminder how much taller he was as darkened eyes looked down on you. The blue of the fire cast half of his face in shadows. “What’s this? My obedient doe wants to defend another man in my bed?” 

Your hands nervously came to the ends of your ears, “I didn’t mean it like that.” A finger twirled, telling you to turn around. You hesitated. Did he want you to leave? He didn’t want to look at you? You hadn’t—, “I’m sorry.” 

With a blink, his eyes were black.  His fingers longer as parts of him seems to stretch between the joints. He twirled them again as his smile grew wicked.

Desperate to show him you hadn’t wanted to upset him, that you wanted to stay, you turned around. The fear of not knowing what he would do next was sending waves of electricity to your lap. You realized you hadn’t touched yourself yet, not that this was the time to start. 

One by one, those freakishly long fingers curled around the small of your waist and lifted you off the bed. The tops of your feet were sliding across the dark maroon blankets beneath you both.

Your heart was pounding in your ears as he pulled you against him. He positioned you above his renewed erection, your legs opening a little in instinct. 

Grateful now to be turned around, you let your face run the full range of feelings as they washed over you. Fear, arousal, anticipation.

“What a wasteful man.” He brought you down with a painfully slow speed, head just now meeting your sticky wet hole. “He never flooded your soft cunt?” He pressed in a little easier this time, but as you sank to take him all in you felt a sting where you’d slightly torn earlier. “When he dies, I’ll be sure to find him.” Cruel. “And make him watch me breed you.” You clenched, yet another betrayal by your body. 

You were reduced to gasps as he stayed stock still and moved you on and off his cock. “Am I bigger than he is?” You could feel his breath against your back as you were lifted and brought back down again slowly. 

You nodded. A terrible liar, you didn’t even try to fib.

He stopped with his head barely in you.

A squirm.

“I’m sure I just didn’t hear you. Try again.”

“Yes.” You were full again as he got his answer. A creaking sound you didn’t recognize startled you.

“Do I fuck you better than him?”

Ah you understood. Your hands held at his fingers digging into your body. “Yes.” Another creaking sound as he quickened your rise and fall.

Alastor’s antlers were wide and multi-pronged as your affirmations jostled around behind his eyes. Your ‘yes’ somehow made you tighter, wetter, hotter around him. His hips started moving again to meet yours. Perhaps he his dick grown a little during his shift to a more demonic form, or maybe you enjoyed the line of questions. All he knew was you were squeezing him like your body didn’t want him to ever pull out again.

Blood dripped from his lips as he cut his own skin, through gritted teeth a final question, “Do you want my fawns?”

Your legs pressed together, you knew there was only one answer and yet you asked yourself. Did you want that? To carry his children? A moan cut through your thinking, “Yes!”

The fire roared, a response to his own reaction.

Alastor felt his mind slip under again, noticing the wild way his shadow was dancing around the walls before his senses all dulled except touch.

The bed drifted away from under his knees and the walls melted like spent candles. Just sounds echoing off space as your moans deepened. As if learning, you began to whisper ‘yes’ to yourself as you felt a building pressure in your stomach. 

Every thrust into you further separated your brain from your body. Your eyes lost focus as you watched the door bounce. No, wait, you were bouncing, right? Bouncing up and down the stiff rail of Alastor’s arousal. Your head fell forward, gasping as you felt him harden further while buried deep in you. He was going to cum again, you could feel it, you would feel it. The thought made your body shake as a pressure grew steadily in you. 

Not a new sensation, but a different one. 

“Louder,” another thinly veiled demand from Alastor that seemed to come from somewhere else entirely. Your eyes noticed a small light on the floor near the wall. A radio, buzzing with the same crackle as his voice.

“Yes,” you ground out, his hands were slippery with sweat as his nails dug in to ensure he didn’t lose his grip on you. “Yes, yes, yes.” He brought you down entirely and only let you off a little, an unspoken fear he would release too close to your entrance and he’d lose precious seed he needed your body to receive. “Yes! Alastor!” You weren’t sure who was talking now, as it surely couldn’t be you. You’d never —

“You’re better than him. You’re bigger and stronger and and he never —- he could never…”

He was suddenly regretting the position, unable to watch you fall apart as he so lovingly spread you open. 

With a shriek, your back crashed into his chest as Alastor fell backward into his pillows. He didn’t miss a beat. He continued fucking up into you but let one hand reach your clit. When you whined, he breathed into your hair, “I need you to orgasm.” Other hand pressing down on your womb, “Many cultures believed a woman couldn’t get pregnant without finding her release first. Surely it’ll take. Cum for me my doe.”

You shook your head, “Alastor that isn’t possible.” Not that you were arguing against the way his finger was rubbing up and down on your swollen clit, you just felt the need to remind him of the obvious. Your eyes wandered up and back to see the hauntingly wide antlers now. His transformed face barely visible in the shadows.

“I thought you were a good girl.” His mouth kissed at the base of your ears, hand over your womb pressing in and exaggerating the feeling of his cock bulging from under your skin. “Darling,” he groaned, “Are you ready for my knot?”

You moaned at the words. No, of course not. 

“Yes,” you got quiet, embarrassed again. Your hand snaked up and behind to hold his shoulder for stability. 

“Relax,” he hissed, feeling your body tensing in anticipation.

You tried your best, but between his strumming finger and the sting still at your entrance you struggled to let things go limp.

This time you felt it growing beneath you. Alastor was ready as well, pushing it in before it was swollen so large he’d have to force it or just suffer with it outside.

Lubricated with the multiple loads already fucked into and then out of you, the knot pushed past your entrance with ease. But then you felt it expanding in you. Eyes crossing as they rolled back with the foreign sensation. It didn’t hurt, but a little alarm was going off in the back of your brain. How could something natural feel so unnatural? And how—

Your body locked up, muscles from thighs to neck tight. Alastor’s finger hadn’t stopped, and as the second knotted release flooded you with his feverish need, as his knot trapped every drop and forced it up past your cervix you tripped into your first orgasm. Different from your own hand and toys, the build up hadn’t been a slow ratcheting climb. No, you were rolling through waves of nearly pained pleasure. The spasming forced your body to feel him even more, pulling him deeper, triggering another wave to crash into you.

Alastor wanted to praise you, a rush of hormones and ego expanding his chest but the sensations had him so overwhelmed he was manually breathing. His hand didn’t want to stop, because then the way your pussy was positively sucking him in would also end. But your little cries and moans got increasingly choked and strained.

The calm briefly offered by knotting a mate during his rut came to your rescue, Alastor dragging a still barely moving finger up your body and going slack into the pillows.

Deep breaths, both of you fighting to slow them down. Alastor was experiencing another moment of clarity, only slightly upset he had doled out so much tenderness.

But for you, there was no deep fog of a heat to numb the sensations and let the more bothersome bits of consciousness turn off. Your mind was just as clear as normal. A little lusty, but nowhere near Alastor’s altered state. As you laid against his chest, waiting for him to be able to pull out, you could feel the pains and aches setting in.

Alastor summoned a minion, food set down on his desk under a silver cloche. Your eyes caught the black and white creature before it was whisked away.

Sitting up, you flinched but fought against the pain, “Alastor. What was that?”

His hands pulled you back down by the shoulders, skin on skin, “My minion. One of many.” 

 Exhausted, you could only sigh, “So, the errand.”

His hands went up defensively, “Oh come now, did you really think I was the good guy?” You didn’t reply. The silence began to bother him. Odd, given he usually didn’t give a fuck.

But he’d asked a lot of you, and you agreed willingly. You did as you were told. A little twinge of concern he had actually upset you wiggled between his ribs.

His hands slipped down your waist and settled over your stomach, “…Are you hungry? If you stay like this, I can help you eat.” You took a deep breath in, but didn’t even move to look at him. He squirmed ever so slightly, “I can only assume you’re… quite sore. Perhaps a bath? But I can’t guarantee we’ll make it out much cleaner than we are now.” His smile was smaller, just lips; no teeth. As his antlers withdrew and his limbs all returned to their proper places he could turn his head enough to look at your face.

Alastor felt relief wash over him to see you deeply asleep in his arms. It wasn’t a bad idea, to sleep before the next spell hit him and he was too far gone to think about baths or meals.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

Alastor awoke in the dark. He found his hands and ankles tied behind his back, his body naked and sweating. He was on fire, pieces of himself lifting in the hot breeze and blowing away. He could feel his body fragmenting. You were just a little ways away and he tried desperately to reach out to you but as his eyes adjusted you were suddenly too far. If he could just get you to take a single piece of him, a shard of himself, he would live still. Even when the rest of him was dead and gone, he’d be alive in your hands. A raging stress, the fire now reaching his bones. It wasn’t too late. He still had time. Just a sliver of his existence was all he needed to get to you.

When you woke up, your body was at the foot of the bed. Looking over you saw Alastor lazily stroking his painfully hard erection. His gaze downcast, vision cloudy with unmet needs.

“Alastor?” With shaky arms you lifted yourself. You were hot. Was it the fire? No, before it had no heat. A little damp outline into the comforter formed where your body had been. 

“You’re awake.” He reached over and grabbed your ankle, pulling you towards him and rolling you onto your back. Hand still around your ankle, he pulled your leg against his chest.

“Alastor.”

He sunk into you without hesitation, hips rolling into you roughly. Your body was rocking against the bed, wood creaking against wood with the steady force of his thrusts.

It felt good. Better than before, your walls felt soft and puffy around him. Alastor’s head was low, groaning every time he bottomed out. You could see just enough past him to watch the bed canopy swaying above you both before he folded you in half and leaned fully over you.

His eyes were unfocused like his mind, staring into the bed. A large palm at either side of your head, his back curved as he angled his hips to reach deeper yet.

“I’m so hot.” You were struggling to get the words out. It felt so good, the deeper in you he reached the more you seemed to be melting away.

Your hips were lifted off the mattress, held up entirely by his cock as he continued to rut into you. He could feel the fever in you rising. 

Bent and tangled together, his head was nearly above yours. He was sweating, hair stuck down and ears folded back. A bead fell from his cheek and hit your forehead. He was working so hard. Such a strong man. A strong buck. 

Something in you snapped. Something twisted and burned in your belly. You brought the other leg up to let yourself be folded in half completely, and his eyes wandered to your face. Your frontal cortex was just static as the lights were shutting off in most parts of your more human faculties. 

Everything got quiet in you, a deep seated feeling of security creeping up your legs and sinking into your bones. With Alastor in you, nothing bad could happen to you. If you were carrying his offspring you’d be guaranteed a new level of protection. You needed it. You wouldn’t survive if you weren’t fucked and bred by the overlord. 

How could your body be wrong when the feeling was so natural? So intensely confident?

“Alastor!” Your nails dug into biceps, hands clamoring up his arms to cling onto him, “breed me, please.” 

He was caught alight, mind on ablaze with his raging fever. Your plea was a magnifying glass concentrating the sun into him and sparking a wildlife. Alastor was defenseless against the way your words affected him. 

He could feel it, he could smell it, your heat triggered finally. His lips caught yours as his hands slipped up the blanket with how he had to contort to reach your mouth. You moaned into him, teeth on teeth as neither of you had any ability to finesse things.

“On your knees,” he instructed. You scrambled to turn around as he briefly left your body. A desperate whine in the seconds that stretched on, the emptiness unbearable. It hurt to have him anywhere but balls deep in you.

His hands slipped around your tail that still tried to swish side to side. When he tugged you gasped, the closest sensation you had was having your hair pulled. Chills ran up your spine. You nearly fell forward, but a strong hand wrapped around your neck and pulled your head back. He lined up, adjusting his legs wider to get down to your level.

“Are you feeling it?” He nipped at your shoulder, “Your heat?”

You pushed your ass back and pressed his tip into you. The sound that tore through your chest was answer enough for him as you tried your best to move along his length all on your own.

“You’re okay,” he squeezed lightly around your neck, pussy twitching around him as lightning snapped through you. “I’ll take care of you.”

Words that made your head spin. His body on yours felt like security. Everywhere his skin touched yours was a gulp of cold water in a drought.

A cliche, as he began to move again and his cock hit your g-spot every couple thrusts, you couldn’t tell where you ended and he began. His fever was matched to yours, no heat exchanged as warm and wet flesh moved around warm and wet flesh. Was that your hand or his on your stomach? Both were searing, both soft and slick. One of your hands was reaching down to hold his arm for support.

Eyes slipping shut, you imagined this was what being high felt like. You were out of your body entirely, feeling his dick slipping in and out of you from a different plane of existence. There was a sense your mouth was moving but no awareness of what you were saying. Truly just babbling as Alastor’s speed hitched. A clawed hand on your hip cut into you as he pressed deeper with every thrust.

He guided you down onto your stomach, hand now resting on your right shoulder to keep you in place. You were entirely flat, his knees parting your legs so he could get flush against your core. 

His knot was in place as he began to swell. You felt it again, him flooding your womb as he released directly into your twitching cervix. A euphoria filled you so totally you were sure you could feel the cells of your body humming.

Like a cool breeze had blown down, your fevers broke nearly immediately.

“Oh,” you squeaked, Alastor’s hand releasing you as he lied on top of you. The weight of him was oddly arousing as it gave a clear comparison of your smaller size. “I think you’re right. Estrus.”

He nodded, rolling you both onto your sides, “Would you like the good news or bad news first?”

Resting your head on his extended arm, you tried getting comfortable despite the sticky feeling of your skin and the burning in your thighs, “bad news.”

“You won’t be walking straight for days.” He said it with a heavy tone of pride.

“Oh geez…,” you could feel his knot still throbbing between your hips, “The good news?”

“Your heat is going to make me even more desperate to fill you,” his free hand ran down your sides and slipped between your legs to feel where you two were connected. 

You turned your head the best you could, “That’s not good news, Alastor!”

He laughed, “I lied. Oh well!”

While the good news had been a lie, the way your body’s shift into meeting Alastor’s instincts upped his feral responses was not.  You nibbled on fruit and bread and cured meats in the small windows the clouds around your humanity parted.

But when they’d roll back in, a tempest of feral wants crashing into you both, you’d find yourself clinging to the deer demon.

You could have had an apple in one hand and be mid bite when his musk would reach you and your grip would loosen. With just a moan and a lifting of your hips Alastor would be dragging you closer, crawling over your body, mounting you wherever you two happened to be.

It wasn’t that you’d become confident by the end of the day, but that you’d lost all semblance of shame and embarrassment.

When Alastor pulled you onto his lap and placed your hands on his peach fuzz covered antlers, you didn’t need verbal instructions. It took all of your arm span to reach them, so you held tightly as he thrust up into you. None of his noises had been as intoxicating as the ones he made when you were leaning over him and squeezing his prongs with every jostle of your womb. Perhaps he’d lost his shame too, loud and long moans the other residents had to have heard spilling from his open mouth. 

The wet slap of your ass coming back down onto his thighs as he bounced you was barely registered. Head hung low to meet his black engulfed eyes, you didn’t notice his smile was gone for the first time since you’d met him. Pinhole red pupils were locked on your face and imperceptibly roamed around your lust filled expression. 

One hand reached up and rubbed the soft skin of your downturn rabbit’s ears between his thumb and index finger. Soft. Velvet. 

A sensation that was wholly pleasant, not sexual in any nature but feeding the comfort provided by Alastor’s cock buried to the hilt. He wanted to enjoy the smile it gave you but he could feel his orgasm climbing exponentially.

There it was again, the darkness of your combined heat and rut slinking in. Body to body, your own sounds harmonizing with his and losing distinction. “Alastor–,” eyes drifting shut, “Please. I feel empty.” His previous loads dripping down your thighs, then down his own, and soaking into the carpet. “Fill me up. Please, can you breed me?”

His hand pulled down on your ear, “That was never in question.”

You let go of his extended prongs, arching your back to take a kiss. More. His tongue in your mouth, another hole full of Alastor. His hands both reunited on your ass and used the flesh there like handles. He fucked up into you, withholding the growing at his base, until he felt you cumming around him again. As your body sucked him in with rolling spasms, he pressed you down on his upthrust. A pained moan as it was pushed in a little late. 

Lightning behind your eyelids, your mouths hanging open and pressed together. 

Both of you a pile on the floor, a cold blue flame and soft music playing from the still broken radio. Uncharacteristically, Alastor’s arms wrapped around your smaller form and clung to you. The sensations were popping up one by one. Sticky skin, sweat rolling down your face, hair sticking to your neck and forehead. You’d have to peel each other apart. Which you did, eventually. When Alastor could pull out, he followed through on the bath he’d been thinking about. 

You protested, reminding him you’d be soaking the floor with displaced bath water as soon as the next urge to mate came around. But he laughed, smile back in place as if it had never left, “Sweetheart if I do my job right you won’t even realize you’re not in bed until you’re knotted and knocked up.”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

He hadn’t been lying about the protective second day. But what he hadn’t anticipated was just how long that aggressive desire to keep others at a distance from you would last. While your deal had been in place for a little while before his rut, it wasn’t until after your time together in his room that it seemed to ever be used. 

But you didn’t need to call out for him, like he had said. No, anytime someone even looked at you with a nasty thought, you were graced with his presence. Most people figured it out quickly enough, but occasionally new and brave idiots would approach you with trouble. 

So when a tall and imposing creature cornered you in a shop, hand holding something sharp and shiny and asked, “Scared, little hare?", you could only smile as your face was lit up by a green glow and offer a little advice, “No, but you should be.”

deleted scene ˗ˏˋ Masterlist ˎˊ˗

˖  ݁𖥔.Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult.𖥔 ݁ ˖

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[strawbeerossi]

Sweet Treat

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid

Description: Penelope gives you aphrodisiac chocolates as a gag gift. Whenever you and Spencer have a movie night, you both don’t realize what sweets you are delving into.

Content/Warnings: Awkward little banter between friends, mutual pining is mentioned, food/eating, aphrodisiacs, unprotected sex

Word Count: 2.4K

Kinktober Day Twenty Three: Aphrodisiacs

Navigation || Kinktober Masterlist || AO3

“Penelope, what the hell is this?” You asked, a laugh leaving your lips as you looked over the container of what looked to be normal chocolate. “Well! I found it online and apparently it’s some of that chocolate that you eat and you just wanna go crazy on the first person you see.” She giggled.

A girls night meant all sorts of things but whenever Penelope pulled out presents, you knew exactly where this was going. You and the girls had met up at her place about an hour ago. After ordering Chinese takeout and having way too much wine, the night had taken a bit of a turn when it came to discussions. Women talk. Sex was a main topic between you and your small friend group.

“So you are giving them to me?! P, I don’t even have a boyfriend.” You laughed. “Who needs a boyfriend whenever you can have fun with anyone in the world. Just keep them.”

And so you did. It was days after the fact whenever you were inviting Spencer over for a marathon of your favorite show. It was going to be fun, you and your best friend from the office watching your favorite show together. He’d offered to pick up food on the way, which he’d stuck with a good Thai place that you both had eaten at numerous times before whenever you got back from a particularly late case.

Spencer was your best friend on the team, the both of you being closer in age compared to the rest of the crew you worked with. Plus you had similar interests when it came to books, movies, among other things. You’d greeted him with a wide smile the minute the door opened. “Hey!” You grinned while moving to hug him. Despite his disdain for hugs or being touched, he’d slowly began to let you in more. He was happy to hug you or have you hold his hand whenever you needed to pull him somewhere else in a crowded room without losing him.

He enjoyed being by your side. Honestly, he was sure he was in love with you because of how caring you were. You listened to his rambles and even asked him further questions. You even laughed at the jokes that were complicated to understand. You were truly a light shining bright on the team. “I hope you have snacks because I didn’t even stop.” Spencer groaned after returning the hug with one arm as his foot kicked the front door shut. “I do. I have a lot in the kitchen.” You assured.

You'd started the new season of your show together and gotten through dinner within a few episodes before Spencer disappeared into the kitchen as you paused the program on tv. “Don’t take too long! I gotta see how this plays out!” You called while leaning back against the couch, pulling the blanket over your body while letting out a soft hum. Spencer had ended up grabbing some chocolate. Which he didn’t read over the label as he grabbed a tab from the container and looked it over. “That’s cute. It’s got little shapes.” He chuckled to himself, breaking one in half as he was moving to take a bite from the rich milk chocolate. It was to die for, so he had to take the other half to you so you could try before you both tore into the bag together.

“Try this. It’s so rich. I actually love it.” He’d commented. You weren’t paying attention to what the chocolate looked like, bringing it up to your nose and smelling it before you were pulling the piece in your mouth. Which it was delicious, your eyebrows raising. “Wow, that really is good.” You laughed, watching as Spencer was sitting down and passing over snacks to you. “We can eat the chocolate later. You know sweet stuff can either send me flying on the walls or I end up feeling bad to do anything.” Fair enough.

It was an hour later when you were on another episode, your body was feeling hot as you shifted uncomfortably on the couch. You wouldn’t like to think that you were attracted to the program, it was a horror series and you were in the middle of a chase scene. So why else were you squirming?

Just as you were going to excuse yourself to take care of the heat in your belly, you noticed Spencer shifting uncomfortably, a pillow resting over his lap. Then you thought about the chocolate, your eyes widening as you were shooting up from the couch and rushing to the kitchen. Spencer watched you, turning slightly on the couch to watch you curiously through the doorway. That’s when you see the box, a soft groan leaving your lips as you lifted up the sex candy while bringing a hand up to rest against your face. ‘

Just great. You knew you should’ve just put it in your room.

“Spencer.” The sound of your voice had him nearly jumping out of his skin as he quickly faced the tv again. “Yeah?” He asked as his hand clutched the pillow harder. Maybe you’d caught him. Even someone who wasn’t a profiler could tell there was something going on, not to mention the growing tension between the both of you.

Mutual pining was normal and you both weren’t exempt from that. Spencer was an awkward rambler but you found it endearing. Just as he found you as equally as endearing even if you were quiet a good majority of the time and relished in his ramblings about whatever was brought up. You both enjoyed each other's presence, the two of you spending time together more often than not.

Those unsaid mutual feelings made this whole situation worse.

You approached the couch again as you slowly sat down beside Spencer again, body leaning back against the couch as you could feel yourself hot, face flushed as you couldn’t sit still to save your life. Spencer had now taken notice, clearing his throat. “I-I uh.. I may need to leave soon. M-mom’s facility called.” A lie but it would be a smooth getaway.

“Oh, yeah. Uh, it might be for the best! I forgot that I have to..” Your eyes glanced around the room. “Reorganize my bookshelf!” Less subtle. “R-right. Uh, This seems weird but can you close your eyes for a minute? I just..” His eyes were glued on the pillow, making you bring your eyes down as well. “O-oh.”

“It’s not because of the show!” He squeaked, face bright red as he was looking back at the screen. “I don’t- I don’t know why but I was looking at you and it just.. I don’t know!” He whined. His awkwardness made it hard for him to admit why there was a pillow on his lap outright, however you had clocked the reasons why.

“You know the chocolate..? Uh, Penelope gave me them the other day as a joke and they are.. They are essentially just sex chocolate.” Your face was hot, chest rising and falling as you were feeling the gush of slick in your panties from the heightened arousal. “Wait. Aphrodisiacs?!” Spencer was looking at you with wide eyes, mouth agape in shock. Well, at least he didn’t feel as bad from getting hard after giving you a few glances. There was a reason behind it.

The both of you stared at one another, faces hot and eyes blown out with lust. “So uh.. How long does this last?” Spencer finally asked, his brain being too clouded over with lust as he stared in your direction. “I-I wouldn’t know.. I never used them.” Your nose crinkled as the both of you couldn’t seem to tear your eyes away from one another. “I, uh, I lied about my reason to leave.” He stated the obvious while you couldn’t help but let a little laugh escape your lips. “I know..” You admitted, slowly pushing yourself to stand. “I um.. I don’t actually have to reorganize my bookshelf either..” You laughed awkwardly while heading over to stand in front of your best friend, hand moving to gently rest over the pillow. “I don’t want you to go.. Not yet. Can you, um, help me out a little bit? I trust you and you are here.” You rambled on as you put your hands together slowly. Spencer was looking at you with wide eyes as he nodded slowly.

“I’ll help.” You were both a bit awkward at first, the male letting you move the pillow before you were straddling his waist, the show in the background continuing to run as your best friend was blushing nervously. “I gotta admit that I’ve only done this one time before..” He spoke while you offered a smile. “It’s alright.” You whispered as you let your head dip down to connect your lips with his. Your bodies were buzzing with electricity as you were deepening the kiss, your hands tangling in his hair while his hands were gripping your hips.

You never thought you’d be in this position, tongue in your closest friend’s mouth while your hips were grinding down against his. You felt a fire inside of you, your body desperate to be bare and touched. As you pulled out of the kiss much to Spencer’s dismay, you were tugging your shirt over your head before tossing it somewhere else in the room. The sight of your breasts in a white bra had Spencer’s Adams apple bobbing as his eyes were trained on the lace that accentuated your skin. “It’s pretty right? One of my favorites.” You comment while watching his eyes stare at your tits with a new sense of hunger in his eyes.

You took it as a great sign as your hand was reaching behind you, unclasping the top before letting it fall somewhere with your shirt. His hands were quickly coming up to cup your breasts before he was just diving right in, wet kisses being pressed against your skin before his lips were wrapping around your nipple, tongue flicking over the nub as your fingers tangled in his hair. “Fuck.” You cursed while his attention was focused on your chest.

Your body was perfect.

As he had gotten enough though, he was pulling back to examine your chest that was covered in a few hickies and your hardened nipples. “You look so pretty.” It wasn’t akin to being called a whore or a slut but you honestly liked it. The way he complimented your body had your cheeks heating up as you were lifting your hips when he had gained enough confidence to work on your pants. He’d tugged down your pants and panties before working on his own pants.

“Eager?” You commented, a little giggle leaving your lips as Spencer looked at you as if you’d grown another head. “Have you seen yourself?! Of course I’m eager!” He defended himself, causing the both of you to share a laugh. “I hate to rush this but-” He was cut off by a groan as your hand reached between you both to give his leaking cock a few tugs. “I know, me too. You can make up for the lack of foreplay later.” You wiggled your eyebrows as you pressed your lips against his once more, your leaking hole sinking down onto his cock.

The both of you had let out moans muffled in one another’s mouths as your hips rocked slowly, getting adjusted to the man’s thick cock. It was always the awkward nerds who had the best surprises.

Your head was falling on his shoulder as he held your hips with a bruising grip. He wasn’t one to have sex often, not being lucky like Derek in the department of women effortlessly throwing themselves at him. He knew that this scenario was one he never imagined happening, your velvety walls clenching tightly around this bare cock while you essentially used him as a human dildo to get yourself off.

He wasn’t complaining in the slightest, watching your face contort in ecstasy as his hips were thrusting upwards to slam into your leaking cunt, a groan falling from his lips as his head tilted back against the sofa. You were whining and moaning with each thrust that he matched with your movements, eventually pushing the one place you needed most. The impact had your hands clutching tightly to his shoulders as you let your mouth fall open with a soft cry.

“Oh my god, fuck, I’m gonna cum.” Your words were slurred, the effects of the aphrodisiacs heightening all of your arousal so you felt like you were going to burst at the seams. Your body was hot, hips surely bruised by Spencer’s rough grip as he slammed into you as well as your legs shaking from their position.

When you did hit your peak, you were tightly grabbing Spencer’s shoulders as your hips slammed down into his lap, ass hitting his thighs at an unsteady rhythm. Spencer however, was quickly flipping you both over, your body sprawled out against your living room couch as he was rolling on top of you.

Taking the opportunity, he wasn’t skipping a beat as his hips slammed into yours, your sensitive cunt contracting around his cock as he was bringing himself to climax. As your moans and whines from overstimulation echoed in the apartment, his own whines of desperation were falling from his lips.

His cock twitched inside of your used pussy, quickly making the effort to pull out of you as he jerked at his leaking cock, a low huff leaving his lips as ropes of cum were now pooling in your stomach, glazing your bare skin as he let out a weak whine. As you lay there covered in his spent, your chest was rising and falling at a rapid pace as you made the effort to catch your breath.

“I think that chocolate needs to be thrown away to avoid incidents like this again,” his voice pulled you out of your post sex haze as you laughed a little. “Are you kidding? I think we need to do this every time we watch our show together.” You teased, making Spencer shake his head with a smile.

“At least hide it for when you have anyone else over. I don’t think I’ll survive if this mix up happens with someone else.”

[potatoplace]

Can't Help Falling In Love

The Afterthought: Chapter 6 | series masterlist

ACOTAR x Archeron!Reader

chapter 5 | chapter 7 | ACOTAR x reader masterlist

Story Summary: Your gained independence has brought you more friendships, a companion, and, surprisingly, a new romance.

Warnings: shitty Feyre, very mild drinking, iiii honestly think that's it? I cannot think of anything else, let me know if I missed something pls

Words: ~11.8k

Author's Note: omg so I'm tired so there might be mistakes BUT everyone let me know what they think!!!!!!!!!! IM SO EXCITED TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK CAUSE OMG IVE BEEN SO EXCITED FOR THIS MOMENT. Also. Peep the fun lil cameo I made (I am sure you all will guess it easily lol it's p obvious imo. Also. I will share pictures if people ask 🤭) I hope you all like this chapter!! ps the title is from an Elvis song but I know it from Fools Rush In but that's what they dance to at the end

18+ only pls

🤍🤍❣️🤍🤍

Mor returned just a few minutes after you finished getting dressed, in a soft, thick navy cotton nightgown, your feet clad in soft, fuzzy white slippers.

You had already set the table- another purchase from the secondhand furniture store that you had made yesterday, coming with four matching chairs. The scuffed walnut wood matched your bed frame, which had been a good enough reason for you to choose it.

And, that you'd been able to carry it home. Slowly, but you had, and you'd returned for the chairs promptly, each time apologizing to the seemingly annoyed shop owner who had said nothing each time, only stared at you over the top of his book.

You let Mor in after the first knock, giggling when you saw everything she was carrying. She had a small duffel bag, a bag filled with food, and another bag filled with... well, you weren't sure yet, but it was stuffed to the brim.

"Did you bring enough stuff, Mor?"

"Oh, hush you," Mor said, breezing past you to deposit the food on the stable, her other bags deposited next to your bed. "I brought pasta! There's a creamy one that has a seafood blend, and some good old spaghetti with meatballs. Plus-" Mor pulled another, smaller bag out. "Breadsticks!"

"Did you get anything healthy?" You asked, taking the breadstick that she handed to you and taking a bite.

"Nope," Mor said through her own bite. "I mean, unless you count tomatoes being a fruit. Which I totally do. So actually, yes."

You shook your head and laughed as you sat at the table, Mor following right after. "As long as there's tomatoes, then. What's all the other stuff?" You asked, pointing your breadstick at her other bags.

"Well, one is my clothes for tonight and in the morning, and the other is full of housewarming presents!"

You let out an exasperated sigh, but you couldn't help the smile that spread across your face. "More housewarming presents? I don't know how much of this I can take."

"Oh, you will take them happily," Mor said sternly. "They're just some small things that I thought you might need, nothing big. Though I would love to help you find a couch tomorrow, if you're up for it?"

You looked at the bag, and back to Mor. "That depends on how much you got me, Mor."

Mor smiled brightly. "Ahh, so you can be convinced. Do you want to know what they are now, or food first?" You glanced down at your breadstick, and quirked a brow at Mor. "I mean the pasta, silly. So?"

"Uhh... Presents first, I suppose, as long as the food won't get cold."

"That should be no problem, if we keep it in the bag. I'll go change into my pajamas really quick, and then you can see what I got you!"

A few minutes later you were sat on your bed, Mor beside you, pulling your first present out as you held your eyes shut.

"Go ahead and open!" Mor said after placing something that felt like a book in your outstretched hands.

It was a book- and upon opening, you saw that it was filled with handwriting exercises, and beginners words. Meant for a child, yes, but...

"Mor, thank you," you said tearily, pulling your friend into your arms. "This is- oh, this is so amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Mor giggled beside you. "You're welcome, Y/N! I know that glass Nuala and Cerridwen gave you is helpful for understanding letters, but I also know you'd prefer to do it yourself. Now, close your eyes again!"

The two of you repeated the process over and over again, until you'd received every present Mor had picked out for you.

She had gifted you a beautiful quill set, with a selection of colored inks along with a larger inkwell filled with the standard black. A diary, in a delicate shade of pink, along with matching letter paper and envelopes, a small kit to do wax seals for when you decide to send letters. Mor had also picked out a few lovely bars of hand soap, along with two cute crystal dishes to hold them. And Mor had brought you two new blankets, one a dark blue, and the other in a dark purple.

"You can never have enough blankets, Y/N. Never," Mor said seriously as the two of you moved back to the dining table, each of you having a blanket wrapped around your shoulders.

"I agree with you completely, Mor. And really, thank you for everything," you said sincerely, squeezing her hand.

"It's my pleasure, Y/N. I'm always happy to go shopping! Now- do you want some of both dishes? Cause... I do," Mor admitted with a grin as she pulled the to-go boxes out of the bag.

"I'd be happy to have both," you giggled, grabbing another breadstick from the bag, this one slightly cooler than before. "So- tell me what's been going on with the Hewn City? Unless you want to avoid work completely."

Mor sighed as she dished out some of both pastas for both of you, onto the pretty clay plates you had bought two days ago, with painted flowers decorating its surface. "Well, Keir has been a pain in my ass, using every available connection he has to try and stop the upcoming election. He's been holding these stupid little rallies at the nightly revels, trying to convince the citizens to stage a coup. Though why he thinks that would work when Rhys or Feyre alone would be able to shut it down, I don't know. Just... He's being a pain in my ass!"

"I'm sorry, Mor. Isn't there anything that Feyre or Rhys would be able to do? Or maybe... Maybe remove him from power, imprison him for attempting to overthrow their rule?" You suggested, then took a bite of the seafood pasta- absolutely delicious, the creamy sauce complimenting the scallops, shrimp, and shellfish well, the pasta tender.

"I've tried telling them that it may be the only way forward, but they don't seem to understand how bad it's gotten as of late. Azriel's been busy in Autumn or Illyria for the past few months, and Cassian's been monitoring Windhaven specifically as of late. And Feyre is pregnant, meaning Rhys is unlikely to send her to the Hewn City without him, which would leave only Amren in Velaris. So..." Mor took a dejected bite of a breadstick.

"So you're stuck there?"

"Pretty much," she sighed. "Though I made Rhys promise to give me at least one day off every week, so I'll be able to come back home, and I'll be able to see you!"

You smiled. "Good, I'm glad. I missed you a lot over this last month, Mor."

Mor's expression matched your own. "I missed you too, sweets. Now... Tell me how everything's been going with you?"

It was your turn to sigh after you swallowed your bite of spaghetti- also delicious, with the slightly spicy sauce and meatballs.

"Things have been... They're looking up now. Now that I've moved out, at least. And working has been really nice. Things around the River House... Besides Azriel, they've been really tough for me. Nesta and Elain... They make me so uncomfortable, and they hate me for no reason. At least, that's what it feels like. And Feyre doesn't seem to care, either..." You shoved another bite of food into your mouth, letting the flavor soothe your pain.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I really thought that Feyre would have tried to make them stop, especially after how rude they were dress shopping for Starfall," Mor said. "But I'm glad to here that things are looking up for you- And that Azriel has been sweet. And working at Sevenda's! You've done amazingly for yourself, love, all on your own. If..." Mor paused, considering her words. "If you decided to not have them in your life anymore, I wouldn't blame you. Feyre I would give another chance, but Nesta and Elain... They're taking their anger about their own situation out on you, I think. And that's unforgivable, seeing as they know how much it's hurt you."

Tears had welled in your eyes at her words, at how well she understood your feelings. "Thank you, Mor," you managed to choke out before the tears fell.

"Oh, sweets... Come here," Mor said, standing from her chair and pulling you up and into her arms, squeezing you tightly, a hand stroking your hair soothingly. "How about we do a face mask and eat chocolate? Does that sound good?" Mor asked after a while, pulling away from you a bit. You nodded your head, not trusting your voice quite yet.

"Let's do it, then."

🤍🤍❣️🤍🤍

The next morning was lazy, with you and Mor sleeping in and laying in bed for an hour, talking about everything and nothing. You felt like you were sharing hushed secrets together, like you had so long ago with Feyre when the both of you laid awake at night, your other sisters sleeping the night away as the two of you dreamed of a life you wanted to live, not just an existence of scraping by.

Eventually, you were dragged from the cocoon of your bed by your bladder, and after you had washed your hands you jumped on the bed, right on Mor.

"It's time to get up," you sang as you laid on top of your friend, giggling when she half-heartedly tried to push you off of her. "You said you wanted to go couch shopping, right?"

"Yes, but not this early," Mor groaned beneath you.

"If you want any chance of paying for it, you've got to get up now!"

"Okay, okay! You've convinced me, you're impossible to give things to unless I've already bought them," Mor laughed, and this time you let her push you off of her- not that you doubted her ability to do it if she truly wanted to. The two of you made your way into the bathroom, going through the steps of washing and moisturizing your faces. "We're stopping for breakfast in a café, though, I'm dying to have a muffin and some coffee."

"That's fine by me Mor," you laughed. "You can change in here, I'll change in the main room."

"Okay, just let me know when you're dressed so I don't accidentally peek on you," Mor said after she had grabbed her bag and returned to the bathroom. That left you to quickly strip out of your nightgown, down to your underwear. You slipped on a simple peach brassiere and into a clean, black woolen dress, in a similarly modest fashion to the one you had worn yesterday.

"You can come out, Mor," you called out, and a moment later the bathroom door swung open.

"Let's get going, I'm starving," Mor complained as the two of you slipped on your boots and outerwear, you of course wearing all of the items Azriel had bought for you. "Oo, I like these," Mor said, stroking the cape with an ungloved hand. "Did you buy it recently?"

A blush spread over your cheeks against your will. "Oh, uhm. Azriel gave the set to me, for Solstice."

A smile spread across Mor's face. "Oh? Azriel bought it for you?" Mor asked.

Your cheeks heated further at her actual question. "It's not like that, he's just being nice..." You mumbled.

"And what if he wasn't?"

You blinked at Mor for a moment, dumbstruck by her suggestion before you laughed. "No, no. I don't... That's not a possibility, Mor."

Mor shook her head. "But you want it to be- and it is. Any male or female would be lucky to have you, Y/N," Mor said gently, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "Now. Let's go get breakfast."

🤍🤍💙🤍🤍

Three hours later, you and Mor were carrying a couch through the snow covered streets of Velaris, the legs dragging through the white powder. Its pink velvet fabric was a near match to the chair you had already bought, and had a low enough back to allow winged individuals to sit comfortably.

Not that you'd taken that too much into account, it was just a nice benefit for when Azriel came to visit.

Which he would be, tonight. The two of you had agreed to have dinner tonight, as your way of repaying him for your bed. It was the one night he would be in town this week, and since you had the day off it had seemed to work perfectly.

Mor was going out with some friends tonight at Rita's, an activity that you were fine not being involved in, and she had to return to the Hewn City early in the morning.

The two of you said goodbye in the late afternoon, a long hug and promises to coordinate time together and write to each other- you would even attempt to tell her about your week, if you were able.

You spent the time before Azriel turned up cleaning your apartment some, washing the dishes that you and Mor had used last night and putting away the gifts she had given you.

Then? You collapsed on the couch, a blanket spread over you as you enjoyed how soft the cushions were.

A shadow tangled in your hair moments before a knock landed on your door, and you shook your head at the silly little thing.

"Hello, Azriel," you said as you opened the door, face to face with the Shadowsinger, a round, covered dish in his hands. His shadows seemed antsier than usual, a few of them breaking away to swirl around your feet, a tiny smile creeping onto your lips.

His eyes tracked them, tightening for a moment before they met yours, hazel softening as he looked at you. "Good evening, Y/N."

Your smile grew. "Come in, you need to choose a recipe so that we can go shopping," you said brightly as you opened the door further, letting him into your apartment. "You didn't need to bring anything, you know."

"Thank you. I just brought dessert, and it was my pleasure. And I'd be happy to have anything you make, Y/N," Azriel said as he followed you into the kitchen, where you had two of your cookbooks set out on the counter. The ones that Nesta and Feyre had gifted you. He set the dish to the left of them, and you were tempted to peel back the foil covering it.

"None of that, you're going to choose a recipe that you want," you demanded, fully aware that you are being more assertive than you'd been with him... Well, ever.

But he seemed similar to you, in the way that you never liked to accept much of anything from others.

Azriel stared you down for a moment before sighing, a small smile creeping onto his face. "Okay. But you have to let me know if it's a recipe you wouldn't like," Azriel said firmly, waiting to open a cookbook until you had nodded your agreement. "Good."

He flicked through the pages until he settled on a dish you both thought sounded good- chicken and dumplings. "It was my favorite when I was younger," Azriel confessed as the two of you walked to the Palace of Hoof and Leaf, his shadows clearing your path as they had taken to doing over the past month.

"I can't imagine you younger, somehow," you giggled as you looked up at him, trying to imagine him as a gangly teenager. But the image never came, leaving you staring at the very masculine male next to you.

Azriel let out an amused snort. "That's fine by me, I was... I was awkward, back then. But, so were my brothers."

"You? Awkward?" You shook your head. "I don't buy it. You're too calm, all the time."

"That's now. Back then I was a nervous wreck," Azriel admitted, rubbing the back of his head.

"Well, if you're ever nervous now, you do an amazing job of hiding it," you said as you picked out the vegetables you would need, handing over your bank card to the stall owner for a moment, thanking them as you left. The vegetables were placed into the cloth bag you had brought with you, which Azriel plucked from your arms despite your protest.

"If you're paying for everything and cooking, the least you can let me do is carry the ingredients," he insisted. "Now, what else do we need?"

You looked down at your list, squinting at the poorly printed ingredients that you had written down before leaving. "Uh... Chicken, obviously."

"Right. There's a butcher shop just a few stalls down," Azriel said, leading you gently with a hand on the small of your back.

The intimacy of his touch made your breath stutter for a moment, before you reminded yourself that Azriel is your friend, nothing more.

Shopping flew by, easy, light conversation flowing between the two of you while you were in the outdoors.

Azriel carried everything for you, prying every item out of your hands after you had paid for it. But you didn't feel patronized by it, rather... You felt touched, that he wanted to carry the groceries back to your apartment, that he wanted to help out in some way. It was nice.

His helping hands attempted to extended into the kitchen, at which point you fixed him with your toughest stare, demanding that he stayed still.

"Just sit there and let me cook! Enjoy your wine!" You said to him as you dropped the dumplings into the pot. "This is me repaying you for my bed in the one way you would let me- so let me!"

Azriel sighed, but you could almost hear the smile he was wearing. "I cannot believe my shadows are siding with you."

"What?" You asked, turning away from the pot to stare at him, laughing at the sight you were met with. "Oh my- that's hilarious!" You giggled at seeing Azriel, covered in his own shadows as they held him to the chair, even lifting his glass of wine up for him.

"So you say, I find mutiny much less amusing," Azriel said, shaking his head with a smile on his face. "It smells amazing, Y/N."

Your smile grew, nose scrunching at his words. "Thank you, it should only be a few more minutes."

"I'm fine right here, no matter how long it takes."

🤍💞💙💞🤍

Azriel had left your apartment near eight in the evening last night, after he had insisted upon doing the dishes, of course. Dinner had been such a pleasant affair, with Azriel telling you about his work in Autumn and Illyria, and you talking about the small dramas of your fellow kitchen staff.

You could confidently say that you were friends now. Even better, you had gotten Azriel to agree to have dinner with you when he had a rare evening in town that wasn't taken up by court matters or inner circle dinners, though it hadn't been tough to convince the male. The next time you would see him would likely be on Saturday, though he had promised to send a note with one of his shadows if something came up.

Currently though, you were at work, nestled between Josi and Torma.

You'd woken up with an ominous feeling pooling deep in your stomach, one that you still hadn't shaken. But, you'd gotten yourself out of bed and to work; for that, you were proud.

Josi and Torma were going back and forth about where they should go for drinks that night.

"I think we should go to Rita's. Then we can dance!" Josi said excitedly, even doing a little jig, bumping her hip lightly into yours which drew a giggle from you. "See! Y/N thinks it's fun!"

"Dancing would be fun, that's true Josi. But I'm feeling more like sitting and talking a bit tonight, which is why Blue Bar would be a much better choice," Torma explained, giving Josi her best puppy dog eyes as she looked over your head.

Josi sighed. "What if Y/N comes dancing with us? Would you go to Rita's then?"

Your eyes widened at the suggestion. "I don't think-"

"Oh, please Y/N?" Torma begged, setting down her knife and putting her palms together. "Please please please? You haven't gone out with us yet!"

You scrunched your face at the idea. Drinking, dancing, and being near so many people... Was not your idea of a relaxing evening. "I'm not sure... I don't really drink," you said quietly.

"But you don't have to drink! You can just watch us be silly and bad at dancing," Josi enthused, setting down her own knife. "Come ooon, you know you want to see us make fools of ourselves!"

The thought of them stumbling around together on a dance floor did bring a smile to your face. "As long as you guys don't abandon me," you decided, your words resulting in enthusiastic high fives from your coworkers, only making you smile wider.

"Yes! Okay, we can either pick you up from your apartment at seven, or you can meet us at Rita's at the same time," Josi said.

"Uhh... Pick me up from my apartment, I think. Otherwise I might just stay home," you admitted sheepishly.

"Then we'll pick you up at seven o'clock sharp," Torma declared.

The rest of your shift passed quickly, with you leaving around five. You bid goodbye to your coworkers, promising them that you would be ready and enthusiastically awaiting their arrival in two hours.

You walked home, enjoying the slightly warmer weather that Velaris was having today. The sun was shining brightly, even as it began its descent below the horizon.

Still, even the lovely weather couldn't shake the feeling in your bones that something unexpected would happen today, good or bad.

And you were proven right when you arrived to your building, Feyre standing outside of the locked door, looking...

Angry.

Furious.

Your heart picked up in your chest, beating rapidly as you tried to assess why she would be angry... The only reason you could come up with was, well... Why you were standing outside of an apartment building.

"Hello, Feyre," you said, as neutrally as you could with your heart hammering in your chest.

"Y/N," Feyre said coldly, her hands pointing to the doorknob. "Let me in?"

Your brows scrunched together, but you unlocked the door, letting Feyre pass through before you. You led her upstairs, pausing before your door. Should you let her in...? You sighed and unlocked the door, allowing Feyre to enter your apartment. Your safe space.

You only hoped it continue to feel that way, after this visit.

"So... You moved out without telling me? Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? How worried I've been?!" Feyre growled at you once the door was shut behind you.

"Worried?" You asked with a mirthless chuckle. "You've been worried? I was gone for a week, Feyre! A week, and you couldn't be bothered to notice until Mor did!" You yelled at her, your own anger at your situation bubbling up. "Besides, it's not like I could leave the fucking city without your approval anyways, so what do you have to be worried about?! That I'm making my own life, with people who actually care about me?!" Feyre opened her mouth to respond, but you didn't give her the chance. "I felt like nothing but a burden, an annoyance in that house," you hissed. "And if you had actually cared about me, you would've noticed I moved out last Wednesday. And you would've noticed when I got a job. And you would have remembered that I cannot. Read." Tears filled your eyes as you brought up that little tidbit, the sting of it fresh whenever you thought of it. Water had begun pooling in Feyre's eyes, and you knew that if she spoke you would forgive her, even if you didn't want to. "Now get out, Feyre, unless you've decided that my apartment is now your property as well. Come back when you actually realize why I moved out," you said coldly as you opened the door, staring expectantly at her.

She did as you asked, passing through the doorway mere minutes after she entered. Feyre turned to you, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears. "I do care for you, Y/N. But you've got to stop acting like living at the River House was torture."

You scoffed and rolled your eyes, slamming the door in her face and locking it tightly.

Not that it would stop her, if she really wanted in...

You spent the rest of your time before your coworkers showed up curled in your bed, pillows piled around you and blanket pulled over your head. It was only when you peeked at the clock and saw it was ten to seven that you pulled yourself from your cocoon.

Hair brushed out and a small amount of eyeliner and pale pink rouge and lipstick applied, you quickly changed into a different dress. Your cozy black cotton dress was changed to a flowing, sapphire blue silk gown. The sleeves were loose, wider once they met your forearms, and the modest cut and floor length skirts left you feeling secure and covered. You felt pretty in it, one of the few nicer gowns you had taken from your closet in the River House.

You had just pulled on your boots and cloak when a knock fell on your door, Josi and Torma waiting outside.

"How did you get in the building?" You asked with a laugh as you locked up.

"Well, one of the other tenants had just walked in when we arrived, so we slipped inside!" Josi explained, locking arms with you as the three of you left the building.

"Ahh, that explains it."

"Yes. Now, let's get to Rita's! It's cold as balls out here," Torma groaned, taking your other arm and dragging the two of you along faster.

The air in Rita's was hot, a welcome reprieve from the winter chill outside. Josi went to order drinks for the three of you, while Torma led you over to a booth in the back of the bar.

The two of you had just settled in when Josi came back, four drinks in her hands. She set two in front of you, one was water, the other was pink and sparkling, smelling of strawberries and a hint of alcohol.

"I know you said you don't drink, but I thought I would get you something just in case! I had the bartender make it less strong for you. And if you don't have it, I'll drink it anyways," Josi giggled as she slid into the booth next to you, already sipping her own drink.

Normally you wouldn't have dared to touch alcohol, but your conversation with Feyre earlier... You could use a distraction. And, you were with your trusted coworkers.

You took a small sip of the drink, delighted at the way the liquid was fizzing in your mouth. It tasted as it smelled, primarily of strawberries with the slightest hint of alcohol- champagne, you thought.

"Thank you, Josi, it's delicious."

"I'm glad you like it! Oh- Torma, we have to dance to this one!" Josi squealed, setting her drink down and sliding out of the booth, pulling Torma along with her.

You watched them dance, sillier with each song as Josi had said they would, sipping your drink. You started feeling light, tipsy like you had at the one party you'd drank at, when you still lived in the human lands.

Maybe that was why you hadn't noticed him, until he was standing directly in front of you, wings tucked in behind him.

"Oh- hi, Azriel," you said quietly, a flush on your cheeks as you smiled at him.

"Hello, Y/N. I didn't expect to see you here," Azriel replied, sliding into the booth across from you. "You look like you're having a nice time."

You bobbed your head to the beat of the music. "I am. Josi and Torma convinced me to come out tonight. And I am glad they did, otherwise Feyre would have ruined my day," you giggled, the sting from your interaction with her not present with the alcohol running through your veins.

"You spoke with Feyre?" Azriel asked, a curious look on his face.

You sighed heavily and took another small sip of your drink. "Yeah, she was at my place when I got off work, and was mad that I moved out without saying anything. But really, it took her a week to notice!" You vented. "Not to mention she didn't even remember that I couldn't read... Nesta and Elain I understand since they hate me but..." you trailed off, a frown on your face.

One of Azriel's hands slid over your own, grasping it gently. "I'm sorry that you've been let down so thoroughly by your sisters, Y/N. I am happy to know that you're still living how you want, and making friends too."

You smiled dreamily at him. How was he so nice to you? "Thank you, Azriel. I'm glad that you're my friend, you're really nice."

Azriel smiled softly at you, his hazel eyes crinkling at the edges.

One of his shadows tangled itself in your hair, rubbing against your neck and drawing your eyes away from Azriel's. "Your shadows are so silly," you giggled, tickling the shadow with a finger.

"They seem to like you a lot," Azriel remarked, watching as more of his shadows nuzzled themselves against you. "By the way, I wanted to ask you if you're up for a surprise on Saturday, before we have dinner."

You blinked at him for a moment, your thoughts coming more slowly with what you'd drank. "Uhm... Is it a fun surprise? Or like... dragging me to a family dinner surprise?"

Azriel's lips pressed together, the corners of his mouth still tilting upwards. "A fun surprise, I promise. And if you don't like it, we can leave right away."

"Mm... Sure, I don't see why not," you said, trying to come up with what kind of surprise he would plan.

"Good," Azriel smiled. Josi and Torma had wandered back over to the table, fresh drinks for themselves in hand. "I'll let you spend time with your friends," he said, sliding out of the booth.

"Thank you for saying hi, Az," you said sweetly, smiling happily at him. "I'll see you on Saturday!"

Azriel nodded, a slight flush on his cheeks as he turned away, going back to whichever table he had been at.

"Oooh," Josi said from beside you, elbowing you gently in the side. "Someone has a crush on the Shadowsinger!"

You scrunched your face at her, but couldn't get the smile to slide off of your face. "No I don't," you whined.

"Oh yes you do," Torma joined in, poking your leg with a foot. "And I dare say he has one on you as well."

You blushed further at that idea, shaking your head. "No, no, we're just friends!" You insisted, but both of them gave you a knowing look.

"Uh-huh," Josi giggled from beside you. "Just let us know when you start dating, hmm?"

"It's not like that!" You giggled, gently slapping her on the arm. "It's not!"

Torma rolled her eyes playfully at you from across the booth. "Sure, Y/N. Now, do you want to dance with us?"

You looked out at the dance floor. You'd never been one for dancing, since you'd missed out on the years of lessons that Nesta and Elain had gotten. But...

You drained the rest of you drink, about a third of it, and scooted into Josi. "Let's go dance!"

🤍🤍💙🤍🤍

The next morning, you'd woken up with a slight hangover, which had been easily cured with a large glass of water, some dry toast, and a long bath.

Josi and Torma had grinned at you the whole day, talking about how they needed to take you out more often now.

You wouldn't say yes every time but... It had been nice spending time with them, and dancing had been more fun than you'd thought, with a bit of bubbly running through you.

The five days before you would see Azriel again- when you would know what surprise he had planned- passed by quickly at work, but dreadfully slow while you were alone at home.

You had taken to filling out the handwriting book that Mor had given you, your letters improving with every time you wrote them. And you felt you were nearing the point that you could attempt to read children's books, perhaps the book of fables that Rhysand had given to you for your birthday.

Feyre had yet to visit again, something you were grateful for. If she couldn't understand that being trapped and kept here like a forgotten pet, or worse, a chew toy for your sisters, was your problem? Then you didn't want to see her.

You were lonely while you weren't at work, but you could handle that. After all, you had time with Azriel after work today, and you and Mor were having another sleepover tomorrow night.

You had just started washing up to leave work when a shadow snuck into your hair, alerting you to Azriel's presence, likely in the dining room. You giggled at it, gently poking it with a wet finger before you dried off your hands. Sure enough, Azriel was stood in the dining room, talking with Sevenda in a hushed tone, both of them quieting when you walked through the curtain separating the kitchen from the front of house.

"Ah, Y/N! Someone came to pick you up," Sevenda said with a smile, winking at you when Azriel had his head turned.

You rolled your eyes at her, turning your attention to Azriel. "Come to take me to the surprise?"

"I am, in fact," Azriel nodded, extending a hand to you.

You took it without thinking, letting him lead you out of Sevenda's restaurant and into the snowscape of Velaris. His hands were soft, even with the scars that you knew covered them, and the calluses that you knew he should have, being a warrior and all.

His shadows were buzzing around the two of you excitedly, mirroring that of their master. Something about where you were going had Azriel as close to giddy as you could ever see him getting, a slight smile stuck to his face, his wings twitching every now and then.

Soon enough you came to a stop in front of a large building, various magical creatures painted onto the sign above the door.

Velaris... Animal... Shelter?

You blinked at the sign, confused. Surely you hadn't read that right.

"Come inside, I think you'll like it," Azriel said, gently tugging you into the building. Once inside, your ears were met with so many different sounds: meows, barks, bird trills, growls, hisses. There were a few rooms, all separated with glass walls and doors, filled to the brim with animals.

You were instantly drawn to the room housing felines- there were so. Many. Kittens!

"Oh my gods, can we go in?!" You asked Azriel, your face flushed from excitement and the cold as you met his hazel gaze.

"Of course we can, we just need to keep all of them inside the room." Azriel opened the door for you, letting you pass through first.

"Oh, they're so cute!" You squealed, approaching a pile of kittens, all conked out. You sat on the floor next to them, petting all of their fuzzy little heads and milk filled tummies, delighting in the squeaks they let out.

"This is an amazing surprise, Azriel," you told him once he sat down next to you, his wings drawing the attention of some of the active kittens.

"Being here isn't the only surprise," Azriel said. "If you'd like, you can take one home. I've already picked out some possible furniture you might like for the little one, if you decide to have one."

You gaped at him, completely shocked. "I can... I can take one home?" You asked, looking back at the kittens with new eyes. You could have a companion... Someone just for you.

"You can," Azriel said warmly, a smile on his lips when you looked back at him.

A grin spread across your face and your launched yourself at him, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck. "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

His arms wrapped around you for a moment before you pulled away. "You're welcome, Y/N. I thought you might like to have a companion at home."

"Well you were right," you said giddily, turning back to the kittens. All of them were so adorable, so sweet while they were sleeping. But you would want one that was calmer while awake, matching your energy levels.

You and Azriel stayed in that room for two hours, playing with kittens and talking about what you'd both been up to over the past five days.

"The elections are heating up, and thankfully Rhys and Feyre sent me to the Hewn City to help protect the candidates going against the current leaders," Azriel told you as he let four kittens climb over him, even onto his shoulders and head. "Mor sends her love, by the way."

You smiled, both at the sight and the mention of your shared friend. "That's sweet of her, we get to have a night together tomorrow, which will be even more fun with my new little one," you said. "I still don't know which one I want, though."

"Take your time, you want to get one that you'll bond with well," Azriel suggested.

You looked around to room, trying to find any kittens that you hadn't interacted with yet. There, on one of the shelves... Mostly hidden behind a fluffy bed stuffed onto the shelf was a tiny kitten with glowing green eyes, her beautiful silvery coat shimmering even in the slight darkness of the shelf. You crawled over to her, extending a hand back to let her sniff. She hissed softly at you once, but let you run your fingers across her head, purring at the first touch.

Oh yes. This one.

She seemed slightly afraid of everything, hissing gently when you plucked her from her spot and cradled her in your arms. She was so tiny, and her fur was so soft and puffy, you wouldn't be surprised if she turned out to be a total fluff ball. Her tummy fur was the palest pink color, absolutely adorable. And her silvery fur had streaks of light tan running through it, along with slightly darker streaks of grey.

She was perfect. And the way her eyes closed as you pet her was so comforting to watch, you knew that you had found your fur child that you wanted to take home.

"I want her," you said to Azriel, tilting her in your arms so he could see her better. "She's so cute, and she seems nervous, like me."

Azriel laughed softly. "She's very cute, Y/N. Do you know what you'd want to name her?"

You looked down at her, trying to think of something that would suit her. At the same time, she let out the tiniest little squeak, that sounded like a soft 'eek.'

"M'aiq. Cause she's mine, and she made a little eek noise," you said, nodding your head at the name.

"M'aiq... That's a cute name for a cute little Starfall kitten."

"Starfall kitten?" You asked, wondering if that's why her eyes glowed green.

"Yes, every year, in the two months after Starfall, about one in every litter is born with a Starfall spirit inside of them. Or, at least, that's the explanation I've heard for why their eyes glow," Azriel explained, beginning to place the kittens that had climbed onto him back on the ground.

"Awe... You're even more special, my little M'aiq," you said cheerily, nuzzling your nose against hers.

Azriel led you out of the glass room and to the counter, where a fae took M'aiq and put her into a small carrier. He then led you into the shelter's store, where they had plenty of furniture, toys, and anything else you would need in stock.

You picked out a tall, carpeted structure that had a few platforms that M'aiq could rest on, as well as four different beds meant for small felines. A magically cleaning litter box and several food and water dishes also came home with you, as well as many, many toys.

His shadows sent everything to your apartment besides M'aiq in her little crate, which Azriel picked up for you. You tried to pry it out of his hands, but instead he slipped his free hand into yours and began leading you back to your apartment. Along the way you stopped in the Palace of Bone and Salt, picking up the things you would need for a simple pot roast dinner, seeing as you would be distracted for the rest of the evening.

Once you were inside the apartment, you immediately snagged M'aiq's crate from Azriel and pulled her out of it and into your arms.

"You're so cute," you cooed to her, petting her tiny head slowly.

You felt Azriel's eyes on you before you saw them, glancing up and smiling warmly at him. He looked away, the slightest blush on his face.

He is, too.

You placed M'aiq into one of the many cat beds now decorating your apartment, this one placed at the foot of your bed. "Stay there, sweetie, while I make dinner," you told her, her nervous green eyes on you. "I'll make you something, too, don't you worry."

Azriel was smiling softly at you when you turned to the kitchen, the expression making his face even more beautiful than normal.

You'd never understood how a male could be pretty, until now. But now you knew why Feyre called Rhysand the most beautiful male she had ever seen, because you thought that might be true of the winged male in currently in your kitchen.

"Did you need help with dinner?" He asked as you approached the bag of food he had placed on the counter.

"Hmm... I suppose since this isn't me paying you back for anything, you can help this time," you decided, setting out two cutting boards and handing him a knife. "Cut the potatoes into halves then quarter the halves, slice the carrots half an inch thick, and the onions into eighths please."

Azriel nodded and began rinsing the potatoes and carrots, while you grabbed some chicken from your cold box, dicing it after you started a flame under a pan with a bit of oil in it.

You balanced cooking the chicken for M'aiq and braising the roast while Azriel cut all of the vegetables, finishing at the perfect time, right when you needed them all to be added to the pot.

Azriel took over seasoning the roast while you fed M'aiq for the first time, grinning from ear to ear as you watched her devour half of the chicken that you had cooked for her. You'd get the portions down in no time.

With the roast in the oven, you and Azriel relaxed on the couch for a while, M'aiq in your lap.

After a little bit, Azriel had his shadows bring him a few reports after he made sure you would be okay with it, quietly filling them out with the scratch of his quill on the paper.

You decided, since you had tipsily told him that you were illiterate at Rita's anyways, that you would work on your handwriting in the book Mor had given you again, fighting the blush that had overtaken your cheeks.

But he said nothing about what you were doing, only giving you one curious glance before returning to his own work.

He was thoughtful like that. He thought about what would make you uncomfortable.

Your heart thumped in your chest at the feelings you were developing, ones that you had been fighting so hard to keep at bay.

But you were failing.

You were failing because this sweet, caring, thoughtful male did nothing but make your life brighter, Shadowsinger or not.

Doing your best to keep your attention on your workbook, you passed the rest of the time until the roast was done in a comfortable silence, the scratching of quills, crackling of logs, and M'aiq's soft purrs the only sounds in your ears.

Azriel checked the roast for you, after you had complained about having to move M'aiq when she was so comfortable and sleeping... And then he brought a bowl over to you along with a napkin, eating his own on the couch as well.

You felt so comfortable near him, even sitting so close, unaccompanied by anyone else. Two and half years ago you would have balked at the idea, the impropriety of it. But Azriel had been nothing but gentlemanly toward you, even when he had flown you up to the House of Wind.

And really... You would never be the whore that Nesta claimed you to be, after all you had never even been kissed in your twenty years of life, let alone had relations with someone. Just the thought of that sent anxiety through you. No, you would not have sex with someone until you were married, as you had been raised to do. You even... You even found it romantic, to save yourself for your future spouse.

So, being alone in your apartment with Azriel? That was an impropriety you were willing to overlook.

Azriel left your apartment near eleven at night, having spent extra time with you while you helped M'aiq settle in to her new home.

When you shut the door behind him, your heart fluttering from his presence, and now absence.

You turned your attention down to the fluffy ball in your arms. "What do you say, M'aiq? Are you ready for bed?"

Her soft squeak was enough of an answer for you. You settled her on the bed, next to your pillow while you washed your face and dressed for bed.

You laid down next to her, covers pulled up to your shoulders, with a hand poking out so you could pet her as you went to bed.

You didn't feel quite so lonely, laying in the dark now.

🤍🤍❣️🤍🤍

As soon as you exited work, you were assaulted by way of an aggressive hug from a bouncy blonde. Mor swung you around, giggling.

"I'm so excited to see you!" Mor yelled, squeezing you tightly.

"I'm excited to see you too, Mor!" You giggled after she set you on your feet again. "So, what's the schedule like for tomorrow?"

"Well," Mor started as the two of you began walking to your apartment. "I have to be back in the Hewn City by noon, and... I have a family dinner to go to tonight," Mor said with a sigh. "So I won't be with you for dinner, but I'm planning to book it out of there and have dessert with you!"

You nodded in understanding. "That's fine, Mor, but you should come to my apartment first! I have something to show you."

"Oh?" Mor asked, quirking a brow at you. "What is it?"

"If I told you now, it wouldn't have the same effect!" You insisted as you let her into your building, following her up the stairs. Your door swung open, and you heard the skitter of claws on wood. "Oops, I think the door spooked her."

"Her?" Mor asked, looking around before her eyes locked the far wall. "She's under the bed."

"Oh, M'aiq!" You called as you pulled off your boots before crawling next to the bed. "Come on out, sweetie, Mor is your friend," you said softly, rubbing your fingers together to draw her out. No luck, though, especially when Mor kneeled down to peer under the bed. M'aiq actually hissed at her, spitting and everything. You hated that she was distressed but... She was so cute.

"Awe, she's adorable!" Mor whispered. "And she's a Starfall kitten, oh that's so sweet. You know, they tend to bond strongly to their owners, some are even able to communicate with them. Not talking," Mor giggled when you gave her a wide eyed look. "More like... Their emotions can be shared with you, similar to daemati, but it's just a connection between them and their person. Maybe your little M'aiq will do the same."

You looked back to her, where she was now sitting, pressed tightly against the wall but no longer hissing. "That would be so cool," you whispered.

Four hours later and Mor was back in your apartment, lounging on your bed with you, M'aiq laying inbetween.

"So, besides the kitten, what else is new?" Mor asked you, popping a chocolate into her mouth a moment later.

"Well..." You blushed. "I... I like Azriel..."

Mor grinned at you. "I knew you would! And honestly, I don't see why he wouldn't like you. The two of you are so well suited for each other."

You shook your head. "I don't think so Mor, I'm... I'm human," you whispered, your eyes stinging.

"And what does that have to do with anything?" Mor asked seriously, tilting your chin back up so you would look at her. "So, you're human. Why does that matter?"

"Well, because... Because I won't be around for long, and it's cruel to shackle someone to me when I'll be old and grey in such a short time," you admitted, finally giving voice to your doubts.

"Who says you'll get old and grey?" Mor asked. "Maybe there's a way for you to not age, we just haven't found it yet. And besides, it's Azriel's choice if he decides to pursue you, he would know the possible outcomes. You deserve to be happy, Y/N," Mor said softly, her own eyes shining with tears. "I know that you're stuck here, and you would prefer to be in the human lands, but you still deserve to have happiness here, and if that means having a partner? Then that's what you should do, sweets."

You sniffled at her words, willing your tears to not fall as you stroked M'aiq. "Maybe... Maybe you're right... But I still don't think he likes me in that way," you said quietly.

"Well, I think what you think is wrong. I've never seen Azriel smile as much as he does when he's with you," Mor giggled, causing you to do the same. "And the two of you look so cute together!"

"Mor, stop," you laughed. "I don't want to get my hopes up..."

"Okay, okay. I'm just saying..."

You scrunched your nose at her. "Different topic. Tell me how things have been going with the election?"

"Well..."

🤍💙💘💙🤍

Friday night you and Azriel had planned to spend the evening together, but you were surprised to see him on Wednesday evening, after knocking on your apartment door.

"Hello, Azriel," you greeted. "What are you doing here?" Your eyes darted down, seeing his shadows swirling around his legs, a few darting out to brush against your legs. But more interesting was the box in his hand, pink with a matching ribbon tied in a cute little bow wrapped around it.

"I, uhm-" Azriel stammered for a moment before taking a breath. "I came here today because I want to ask you on a date, Y/N."

Your breath caught in your throat, your heart stopping. "I- what?"

Azriel's mouth tilted up in the corners. "I want to take you out on a date. I want to spend time with you, have a chance to court you. I like you, Y/N. And I was thinking we could go out for dinner on Friday night, if you decide to say yes."

Your brain short circuited. He- he likes you?

"I- Is this a joke?" You asked in a small voice, your heart bracing for the answer you were dreading.

Azriel's eyes saddened for a moment, his hands twitching where they were holding the box. "No, Y/N, I would never joke about this. I like you, very, very much. And I would very much like it if you joined me for dinner Friday night at seven," Azriel said softly, his eyes locked on yours. They shone with nothing but the truth, soothing your worries and sending heat to your cheeks.

A small smile slid onto your lips. "I... I'd like that very much, as well."

Azriel's smile at your words set your heart ablaze, the fire of your feelings stoked by the knowledge that he shared them as well. "Good, good. This is for you," Azriel said, placing the box into your hands once you held them out, his fingers brushing against yours. Just that little touch sent flutters through you, your blush deepening. "It's Elain's recipe, the white chocolate raspberry cake that you love," he explained. "I thought, even if you did not share my feelings, that you might like something sweet anyways," Azriel admitted, rubbing a hand against the back of his head.

"Thank you, Azriel," you said softly, touched that he would still care for you, even if you'd rejected him. "I'll... I'll see you at seven on Friday?" You asked shyly, still in disbelief.

"I'll see you then, Y/N," Azriel said, raising one of your hands and pressing his lips to the back of it. "Sleep well, dear."

Your heart thumped in your chest, hard enough you thought it might beat out of your chest. "You too," you said quietly, watching as he smiled once more at you, before disappearing down the stairs.

You shut the door, leaning against it after you locked it.

Had that really just happened?

Your eyes drifted down to the box in your hands, proof that Azriel had visited, had brought you it, had... Had...

Oh gods, you had no idea of what to do for a first date!

You set the box on a kitchen counter, opening it to see an adorable, heart shaped cake, decorated with pretty pink swirls of icing. It made you giddy, knowing that the cake was a present from a suitor. From Azriel. You cut a slice for yourself and grabbed a fork, taking the plate over to the table.

The cake was as delicious as you remembered, and M'aiq jumped onto the chair next to you, watching as you ate.

"If only you could give dating advice, little cutie," you mused, having another bite. No, you'd have to go see Mor for help.

🤍🤍❣️🤍🤍

The next morning, you knew that Mor was in town, visiting the River House to give a report on the upcoming elections to Rhys and Feyre- early, too, before you started your work day.

You bundled up early, your nerves getting the better of you. You needed her advice, and you needed it before Friday. Which meant this morning was your only option, even if it meant going to the River House...

You entered your former home, filled with anxiety. There was no way to tell how this would go, given your last encounter with Feyre, but you were determined to get what you needed, and that was a conversation with Mor.

Luckily for you, she, Feyre and Rhys were sat at the dining table, having breakfast. Mor was chugging coffee until she saw you, setting her cup down and rushing out of her chair.

"Oh, Y/N! I'm so happy to see you!"

"I am too, Mor, I was-" You looked at Rhys and Feyre. "I was hoping I could talk to you, if that's alright?" You asked nervously.

Mor glanced back at the two of them before nodding. "That's fine, sweets, what did you need?"

"Uhh... Can we go outside, to talk?" Mor nodded and followed you to the front door, slipping on her coat before leaving the warmth of the River House. You walked a little bit away before talking, you didn't want anyone besides Mor to know. "Okay, so... Remember how you said that Azriel might like me...?"

"Oh mother!" Mor exclaimed. "He asked you out, didn't he?!"

You blushed and nodded your head. "Yes, last night, and for tomorrow night. But I- I've never been on a date before," you confessed, wringing your mittened hands together. "I don't know what to do, I don't know what's expected. I've never- I've never even been kissed!"

Mor placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Oh, hon! Nothing will be expected except for you to give it an honest try, and to be yourself! And as for never being kissed, I could change that," Mor offered, wiggling her eyebrows at you.

You swatted her arm, shaking your head at her. "You're very pretty, Mor, but I don't like you that way," you giggled. "But... But what if he... What if he doesn't understand that I'm... saving myself," you whispered, "For marriage?"

"Y/N, if Azriel is in any way demanding sex from you, then he doesn't deserve you. I also don't think Azriel is that kind of male, he seems like a true gentlemale, in my opinion."

Her words soothed the anxieties in your chest, calming you down. "I don't think he would either," you said shyly. "But I... I also don't know what to wear."

Mor's eyes lit up even more, and she clapped her hands together. "Oh, oh! We can go shopping when you get off work today! I'll make sure I can stay in town until eight tonight, okay? And I'll see if I can come over tomorrow evening before you leave and help you get ready, if you'd like?" Mor asked.

"Really, Mor? That would be lovely," you said, hugging your friend. She squeezed you back. "Thank you, I'll see you at five, yes?"

"Yes you will, sweets. Now, you get to work, and I'll get back to that meeting. See you later!" Mor said with a wave, turning around the way you came.

Your shift passed incredibly slowly, your mind drifting to every way that the date could go right- and also wrong. You had nearly driven yourself crazy by the time you had washed up and left the building, Mor waiting by the door with two steaming cups of tea in each hand.

"Let's get shopping, sweets!" Mor said brightly, handing a tea to you and leading you to a dress store in the Palace of Thread and Jewels. It was a different one than you had gone to for your Starfall dress, for which you were thankful.

Mor lead you through the store, showing you dress after dress in styles and colors that you loved. All the while, she gave you little tips of advice, most of them along the lines of "be yourself and know that he is just as if not more nervous than you are."

After trying on ten different dresses, you settled on a rose pink silk dress with a modest neckline and floor length skirts. The sleeves billowed out before coming in at your wrists, the silk laying across your body in a flattering fashion. You could safely say that your body had filled out over the past month, what with you eating a small lunch at work and having dinner most nights. Your curves were more pronounced, a bit closer to how you had been before being taken to Velaris.

Mor had also insisted on buying you heeled boots in a matching shade of pink, a gold heart buckle keeping the strap in place. They were cute enough that you didn't fight her on accepting them.

She walked you home, parting with a strong hug and a promise to come by a bit after you got off work tomorrow.

But for tonight? You had another slice of cake, then snuggled up with M'aiq under the covers, using her purrs to chase away your racing thoughts.

🤍💙🤍💙🤍

"You look gorgeous, Y/N!" Mor squealed as she stood back, having put the finishing touches on your makeup. "What do you think?"

You looked in the mirror, taking in the very light blush on your cheeks, the softly glittering pale pink eyeshadow on your lids, brown eyeliner complimenting your eyes, making them look even softer than normal.

"I agree! You do an amazing job every time, Mor," you praised, standing to hug your friend tightly. "Thank you so much for helping me get ready, today and yesterday."

"Oh, sweets, it's no trouble at all! In fact, it's been so long since my own first date that it's bringing back this memories, how fluttery your stomach gets when you see them..." Mor sighed happily. "Well, I should get going, otherwise Keir will riot."

"When are the elections over, again?" You asked as you walked her to the door.

"In two weeks, thank the mother," Mor groaned. "Then I get a nice, long vacation for three weeks."

"Just two more weeks, you can do it!" You encouraged, wishing there was something you could do to make it shorter.

"Yes, I know... And you had better tell me everything that happens tonight!"

You giggled at her words. "I will, Mor!"

"Everything!" Mor yelled as she went down the stairs.

You shut the door looking at the clock. Half past six. That was plenty of time for you to feed M'aiq her dinner and get dressed. And luckily for you, cooking something would keep your mind occupied enough to not panic about Azriel's impending arrival.

Your little child was fed and your dress pulled onto your body, pink boots slid onto your feet. All you had left to put on was your cloak, mittens and scarf, but that could wait until right before you left. Five minutes passed dreadfully slowly, and at 6:57 you pulled on your winter gear and descended the stairs after saying goodbye to M'aiq.

Waiting for you just outside the building door was Azriel, a bouquet of roses- red, lavender and white- in his hands.

"Hi, Azriel," you said, a blush instantly coming to your cheeks at the sight of him in a fine black shirt and pants, a change from his normal Illyrian leathers. The shirt clearly showcased his physique, something that you could appreciate. He had no knife belt on him tonight, his waist looked a bit barren without it.

"Good evening, Y/N." He pressed a kiss to the back of your mittened hand before pressing the bouquet into your hands. "I thought you might like some flowers," he said with a small smile, one that you easily returned.

"I love flowers, and these are absolutely beautiful," you said, raising them to your face to smell them. "And they smell lovely as well."

"I'm glad to hear it. Would you like to take them upstairs, or my shadows can, if you'd like?"

You bit your lip. If you went back upstairs... You might chicken out. "If your shadows could take them, that would be nice." In the next moment, the bouquet was out of your hands, whisked away by his shadows to the vase in your apartment. "So, where are we going for dinner?" You asked, locking your arm with his after he held it out, your hand holding onto his muscled forearm.

"It's an Illyrian restaurant, I helped the owner and his cousin leave the camps sixty or so years ago, and I've found that, except for your cooking, it's my favorite restaurant in all Velaris," Azriel explained as you strolled towards the Palace of Thread and Jewels.

"Really? That's so amazing, that you're part of the reason their dreams came true," you said, even more enamored with the male beside you. "You're going to have to recommend things to me, I wouldn't know where to start," you giggled.

Azriel smiled down at you. "How about we share a couple of dishes? That way you can try whichever ones catch your eye."

You met his eyes, a smile on your own lips. "That sounds perfect, Azriel."

His eyes sparkled as he opened a door for you, a hand on your lower back guiding you through, sending a renewed flush to your face.

You were seated a moment later, in a cozy booth near the back of the restaurant, two menus placed on the table. Azriel ordered a pot of tea for the two of you to share, which warmed your heart.

He already knew you so well.

"Now, what sounds good to you, dear?" Azriel asked, the pet name sending your heart into overdrive.

You looked down at the menu, but with your excitement and still somewhat illiterate eyes, you were lost. You bit your lip for a moment before deciding what to do. "What if you order your favorites, because I am overwhelmed by choice?" You asked, relieved when Azriel nodded his head.

"That would be their beef stew, made with Illyria native vegetables and their roasted Illyrian trout with roasted vegetables. Do those sound good?" Azriel asked. You nodded your head- both of those sounded fantastic, and you were excited to see what he enjoyed most.

When the server returned with your tea, Azriel ordered the food before returning his attention to you, the weight of it making your breath catch in your throat.

"So..." You started, entirely unsure of what to say.

"I'm glad you decided to come out with me," Azriel said, his eyes soft as they met yours.

"I am too," you said shyly. "I'm still... Shocked that you asked me to come out, though."

A soft frown slipped onto Azriel's face, and you wanted nothing more than to wipe it away. "Really? I'd thought..." Azriel's own face heated a bit. "I thought that I was rather obvious with my affections. I might be the spymaster of this court, but I'm woefully inept at hiding my own feelings, at least... When it comes to you," He admitted, voice low and gentle.

"So... We both like each other... And thought we were bad at hiding it?" You giggled.

"I suppose so," Azriel chuckled. "But truly, I am very happy that you're here tonight, with me. Now, tell me- How is M'aiq settling in?"

Now that was a subject that you could go on and on about, with only having her for a week now.

You had covered how she was doing wonderfully at your place by the time your food arrived, with Azriel dishing your plate for you. The gesture made you smile, all the little ways he took care of you already.

The food was absolutely fantastic, flavor bursting along your tongue. Both of the dishes were spicy, but not so much that you couldn't handle it.

Conversation flowed between the two of you as you ate, just as it always did. You talked about your dreams for the future, the few that you did have at this point, your brain already working Azriel into them- not that you admitted that to Azriel, it was a bit early for those sentiments. Azriel told you a bit more about his upbringing, glossing over the parts of his life before he had befriended Rhysand and been taken in by his mother. You didn't pry, but you were a little curious to know every part of his story, everything that had shaped him into the male you cared for.

Soon enough you were stuffed full of warm, delicious food, the plates in front of you empty. More than that, you were filled with joy from Azriel's company, from how he clung to your every word.

He led you from the restaurant, his hand placed on your lower back once more, the warmth of it radiating through the fabric of your dress. You walked along the Sidra slowly, leaning your head against Azriel's arm, trusting him to keep you from falling.

You were almost halfway home when you heard the most beautiful music, coming from two musicians playing next to a bar, one with a violin and the other with a cello. You slowed your pace, Azriel's arm tightening around you as you did so. Listening for a moment, and gazing up at the brilliantly shining stars above you, you had an idea.

"Azriel, would you dance with me?" You asked him quietly, tilting your head to look at him.

His eyes met yours, a smile glowing within them as well as covering his lips. "I'd be honored, Y/N. So long as you call me Az."

You smiled brightly at him. "It's a deal, Az." You let him turn you in his arms, clasping your right hands together and placing a light hand on your waist. Your other hand came to rest on his shoulder, grasping it lightly.

The two of you swayed together in a small circle to the lovely music, the light of the stars shining down on you.

It was the date of your dreams, if you were being honest. Lovely conversation and food, and such a romantic partner, willing to dance in the snow with you because you asked.

So when you finally arrived at your apartment, you were a bit sad the date was ending. But more than anything, you were excited for everything that lay in the future for the two of you.

Azriel smiled down at you softly, his eyes warm despite the cold temperatures. His wings twitched behind him, just before he leaned in a bit.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked as one of his hands came to cup your cheek gently, so, incredibly gently.

You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak. He leaned in further, allowing you to close the last, tiny gap between your lips.

And when you did, you knew that you would never be the same. His lips were so soft against yours, so gentle and sweet that it stole your breath away.

Your mouth followed for a moment when he pulled away, your eyes fluttering open- you hadn't even realized you'd closed them.

"If it's fine by you, I'd like to see you when you get off work tomorrow," Azriel suggested softly, gaze flicking between your lips and eyes.

"I'd like that," you whispered into the space between you, the tilt of his lips more than worth having to speak so soon after such a life changing kiss.

"It's a date," Azriel said with a smile. "Goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight, Az," you breathed, unlocking the door of your building. He waited to leave until you were safely inside, the door locked behind you.

You just managed to get into your apartment before you collapsed against the door, overwhelmed by just how perfect the night had been. How perfect Az had been.

🤍💙💝💙🤍

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[thewretchednight]

Long Time No See.

Dom!Jinx x Fem!Piltie!Virgin!Reader! Ft. Pow’ Pow

Warnings: Gun fucking, Home invasion, Name calling (Bitch,Esc), mentions of stalking, Slight choking, over stimulation, Squirting, oral. I believe that’s it. If there’s anything thing else feel free to inform me. (Also only proof read twice so sorry for any mistakes thank you @tobyslover for proofreading and fixing it for me.)

Men and minors DNI

You sat in your chair staring at the notes on your desk. You were tinkering around with a new idea that popped into your head. It was fairly late and to be honest with your self you were just sitting and spacing out.

To be fair with yourself needed some time for your brain to just shut down. The sound of the clanging of your window made you jump to attention. Metal fell onto the marble floor with a clang. You stood wiping your eyes nearly tripping over your own feet. 

‘ Whatsa’ firein bullet? ‘ The familiar voice of Jinx coming from the window behind your seat. ‘ Fuck- You look absolutely wiped out or your wits pumpkin. ‘ She took steady strides towards your form letting out a gentle giggle. 

‘ What do you need Jinx… ‘ you huffed glaring at her, giving her a wave of your hand in annoyance.

She paused in her tracks lifting her hands in defense, giving you a mock pout before grinning letting out a hum. She let her arms fall to her sides her stature loose.

‘ Whatsa’ wrong mouse? ‘ She smiled moving closer to you. Gently placing a hand on your chest she pushed you. Stumbling back you fell into your chair. You looked up at her sneering, once you faced up at her your face softened your eyebrows furrowing. Her eyes were no longer blue you noticed. But now they were pink, you could swear they were glowing. 

Swiftly sitting down in your lap hands placed on your shoulders lazily, she spun the chair gently picking something off your clothing. ‘‘ Whats the matter with your eyes-?’ You asked examining her. 

She’s different…

‘ It’s been four years and all you can say is what’s wrong with my eyes? ‘ she snapped eyebrows furrowing her eyes flickering with annoyance and something else…. Impatience? You quickly changed the subject shifting under her uncomfortably ‘ What do you want Jinx?- ‘ you snapped. 

‘ What? Can’t I not visit anymore? ‘ cocking her head to the side her cheek nearly touching her shoulder. 

‘ You’ve never visited befo- how do you know where I lived?- ‘ you questioned looking up at her then looking at the window which she broke, Was she stalking you?  ‘ Never mind that. Why are you here? What do you want. ‘ you mumbled looking back up at her red’violet eyes.

‘ Mmm~ Attention? ‘ she giggled out. You grumbled ‘ Couldn’t you see I was in the middle of something bitch? ‘ You grabbed her wrist of the hand that was stroking your hair. She gave you a look of offense before rolling her eyes. 

‘ The middle of you drooling onto your little scribbles? Yeah. I found it less important than me though. ‘ She grinned. The shine of the metal and the barrel of the gun she sneaked out of its halter made you go cold. The metal connected with your skull making you freeze at the contact. You looked up at her eyes wide. She mocked your expression laughing maniacally after leaning back daring to fall off your lap. ‘ Now let go of my hand toots. ‘ You fallowed the command letting go of the appendage. ‘ good girl! ‘ she pinched your cheek letting the hand that held the gun fall to her side.  

‘ I love when you think you’re all tuff n all,  till I bring out the toys. Honestly so cute!~ ‘ she squealed 

‘ Look at you now~ not so tuff after all, Huh mouse? ‘ she mocked.

‘ I could give you over to the enforcers. After All you were the one whom bombed the high council. ‘ you warned gritting your teeth. ‘ Oh…~ but you can’t… can you? ‘ she placed the barrel under your chin cocking the gun. You shut your eyes tightly. You shook your head swallowing thickly. Jinx leaned into your ear ‘ Thought so. ‘ 

The boom of the gun made your ears ring the shattering of glass fallowing right after. You shuttered gently looking up at her. She grinned placing the gun on your desk, you glanced at the metal, of course Jinx saw your eyes dart over to the weapon. She laughed humming ‘ Mmmh~ No I don’t think so sweetheart. ‘  she smiled waving her pointer in-front of your face. 

She flipped herself so she was sitting longways on your lap letting her legs hang off the arms of the chair. She picked up one of your notes like it was a rotten banana peel before taking her other hand ripping it In half. ‘ oops~ hope this wasn’t important. ‘ she smiled up at you of which you returned with a scowl. 

‘ Ughhhhh~ ‘ she grumbled ‘ Your so boring. ‘ she pouted throwing the paper into the air. She stood up from your lap back faced to you. She rose her arms in the air stretching with a gentle groan. You took your chance grabbing the gun on your desk. You stood up swiftly, you grabbing one of her braids yanking her back into you. 

Putting her into a headlock you held the gun to her head. She tilted her head back a wicked grin spreading across her face. You gave her a disgusted look wrinkling your nose. She reached a hand up gently caressing your cheek gently. You froze for a second before pressing the gun harder into her skull.  She smiled softly running her hand through your hair digging her nails into it. 

‘ You still love me~ Doncha’ bullet? ‘ she whispered. 

You hated her so much. You thought she was dead. But yet… she was right… you did still love her. 

‘ It’s been a four years.. A four Powder. ‘ you mumbled. 

‘ Mm- sorry, mmbut I was kinda busy bein’ undercover, n all‘ she said shrugging. ‘ You’re really that self centered… ‘ you scoffed pushing her away from you strolling over to your bed sitting down on the edge. She pouted fallowing you gently crawling back onto your lap straddling it. ‘ I didn’t know if you were even alive.. ‘ you mumbled. ‘ I’m here now though~ ‘ she cooed lifting your chin.  

‘ you don’t understand- ‘ you started yet quickly cut of with a pair of lips swallowing your protest. 

‘ You just don’t shut up huh- ‘ she muttered against your lips ‘ blah blah blah- something I’m selfish m’ right? ‘ she huffed. ‘ well- ‘ you mumbled ‘ Your quite the talker yourself there Pow- ‘ 

Before completing your sentence again she kissed you again, hungrier this time, her petite hands wrapped around your neck her thumbs gently pushing into the cushion of your neck slightly blocking your airway. 

Immediately you choked on your own spit grabbing her arms breaking her kiss your wide eyes staring at her wild ones. ‘ What the matter mouse? It’s Mkay. I won’t kill ya or any thing. ‘ she let go with one hand gently stroking your hair. 

‘ Lemme make it up to ya toots~ ‘ she scooted closer to you in your lap quite literally closing any space you had left. 

You opened your mouth to speak placing a hand on her shoulder. ‘ Ahah- Shhh~ ‘ she  whispered holding your chin forcing you to look up at her. She shoved her lips against yours once more heated that time. 

She pushed you back against the mattress keeping her hand on your chest gripping your loose shirt. Her Red-Violet eyes looked nearly luminous. She trapped you between her and the mattress,  her lips attacked the flesh of your neck teeth nipping your sensitive skin. 

‘ Fuck-~ ‘ you whimpered weakly under her, you reached to wrap your hand around her neck. Soon as your thumb grazed over her clavicle the cold metal of her pistol met with your head again. 

‘ Mmm~ I don’t think so sweetheart~. ‘ she cooed. You’ve already long forgot about that pistol that you left at your side as soon as she crawled into your lap. 

‘ Off~ ‘ she nudged your hand with the gun. You obeyed quickly moving your hands to her sides. ‘ Much better Pumpkin~ ‘ she murmured laying the pistol down next to your head. 

Her hands groped your body roughly, her mouth jumped between your lips and neck leaving sloppy marks and kissing leaving your skin coated in saliva.

‘ Hey-~ slow down… ‘ you whispered carefully caressing her face. She shoved your hand away her fingers slipping under your shirt starting to lift it till she realized it had buttons… 

You remembered her despising buttons, quoting " They take too long “ 

Before you could react. The dagger she kept sliced open the thin fabric you wore. Slipping it off your shoulders she threw the ruined garment aside, leaving you exposed at her will.

‘ Powder~.. ‘ you groaned her tongue licking around the outside of your breasts. 

She reached up placing a hand on your chest her classic chipped pink and blue nails scraping against your skin. Her lips moved up to your neck again her thumbs gently massaging your breasts. 

You reached up fumbling with the her crop top. She pulled away from your skin to help you out by finishing your work pulling the leather over her head throwing the garment aside.

Pulling her back in for a kiss. Your fingers explored the various scars and other marks all over her body, moving her hands up to her shoulders you gently pressed your fingertips into them earning a groan from her. 

‘ Awfully quiet for someone who talks a lot. ‘ you teased the female pulling one of her braids gently. ‘ Awfully needy for someone who wanted me gone a few minutes ago. ‘ she replied in her usual manner giving you a little giggle. ‘ Shut up. ‘ you hissed kissing her your hands pulling at her hair. Pulling away after a few seconds she sat up on her knees. She unbuckled the arsenal around her waist. Bullets, Little satchels filled with who knows what, a dagger or two. You watched her place it carefully on the floor. Her gaze immediately moved back over to you her fingers hooking under your pants. Fumbling with the drawstring. She un tied your loose knot that you made to keep the garment on your body. She toyed with the now loose waistband before yanking the garment down your legs in one swift motion, the warmth of the room hitting your skin pleasantly. 

She leaned down gently kissing your stomach ever so slightly moving down to kiss near the rim of your underwear, she pulled away slipping down her own pants. Your eyes devoured her form eyes trailing down her body. 

‘ Take a nice long look toots~ ‘  she smirked glancing down at your dumbfounded form.

‘ Anyone ever tell you how incredibly gorgeous you look? ‘ you muttered, watching her thumbs tease the elastic of her pants. ‘ M’ think your the first to tell me n’ those words ‘ she replied with a gentle smile slightly pulling down the cloth covering her hips. Giving you a judgmental look at how intensely you were staring at her hands pulling down her garment painfully slow. ‘ You’re basically drooling over me, Toots. ‘ she pointed out snapping you from your trance. 

‘ I- I surely am not…! ‘ you stammered getting defensive at her words. She laughed at your response discarding her pants at the moment tossing them to the side. She crawled on top of your body straddling you. You quickly shut your trap at the realization of her being on top of you. Her nails running down your body leaving red trails behind them as they reached your hips. ‘ Someone shy now? ‘ She mocked toying with the waistband of your underwear, which was, let’s be honest soaking at this point. The female cocked her head to the side her red violet eyes looking up at you hazily. ‘ No- ‘ you said defensively your eyebrows furrowing. ‘ Good!~ ‘ she squealed dragging your underwear down throwing them aside. 

You opened your mouth to follow up your "No" before you were quickly thrown off by her slinking down your body. Her hands pulling your legs apart to make space for her. Her lips connected with your heat, her tongue sloppily lapping up your juices. You stumbled on your words making a  rugged groan leave your lips. ‘ Fuck! ‘ you hissed out throwing your head back. Her hands grasped each your hips pulling you in closer. She plunged her tongue into your dripping hole. Quickly becoming dissatisfied with her method she latched onto your clit. Replacing two fingers into your hole instead of her tongue. 

Not a few more seconds passing by, you could feel your orgasm build like a ticking time bomb getting ready to explode. ‘ Mmgf- Jinx~ ‘ you grumbled your body tightening under her grasp. ‘ I’m gonna~.. ‘ You warned the female. She hummed in response, the vibrations of her hum making your toes curl like her fingers abusing your cunt. A few more thrusts of her digits has you coming undone within her tight grasp.

’ Jinx… Mmgh too much- ‘ you squirmed under her once she didn’t stop, becoming more and more overstimulated under her lips drinking you up. 

‘ You can handle it… ‘ she muttered into your cunt. The female pulled away wrapping her hand around the gun by your head. She opened the cartridge which held the bullets letting them fall onto the ground with clangs. 

‘ what are you doing?- ‘ you asked fear creeping into your words ‘ Mmmh~ making sure of your safety. ‘ you cocked a brow sitting up only to be shoved back down. Her hands shoved your legs apart the cold metal of the barrel brushing up against your folds.

Shuttering you looked up at her your hands gripping the sheets in anticipation. Her head cocked to the side examining the way your hips flinched. ‘ Are you- still? ‘ she grinned looking up at your embarrassed face cheeks a bright pink. She giggled gently, running the barrel up and down your slick gathering your juices.

She slipped partially of the gun into you making you scream feel like it was splitting you open. “ mmmh~P-Powder!~ ‘ you moaned arching your back off the bed. She leaned down biting down onto your neck harshly before kissing around the visible mark leaving a few others around the flesh of your throat, she then slipped a few more inches of the gun into your heat starting to thrust the hunk of metal in and out of your dripping hole

‘ How do you feel about pow’ pow taking you? Good?~ ‘ she mocked with a grin her nose grazing your ear gently as she took in your scent. Despite the pleasure and her arousing sentence, you were confused.

Who was pow’ pow?

You couldn’t worry yourself over it for long after you felt the knot start to untie in your abdomen. You glanced down at her seeing the bulge of the gun every time it re-entered your body. The sight threw you off the edge, your head lolled back simple moans escaping your lips. You felt light headed your vision blanked for a moment. You opened your eyes to see a pleased Jinx. Sittings on your lap licking the stinky wetness off her beloved gun. 

‘ Din’ know you could squirt there bullet ‘ she smiled tossing the gun to the side leaning down to kiss you deeply. ‘ If I’ve known that little tid-bit of information, I would’ve taken your little virgin ass sooner toots. ‘ 

‘ sorry I waited so long~ ‘ she cooed slipping off your limp body. She rolled you over on your side causing you to groan your chest still heaving. She slipped behind you wrapping her legs around your bare waist her smaller body pressing up against you. She pulled the blanket over you nuzzling into your back. 

‘ I’ve missed you Powder…. ‘ You mumbled, your voice hoarse. ‘ I've missed you too bullet… ‘ she whispered back kissing your neck ‘

Morning. Your body ached. You sat up hold your head a massive head ache burring your thinking process . You looked to your side seeing it empty. You frowned looking around the room in a haze finding no trace of the female. Disappointment washed over you as you moved to the edge of your bed your feet finding the cold marble of your floor. You stretched, you flinched at the sudden sting of pain that burned on your collar bone. You whined getting up quickly moving to your vanity you read " Property of JINX " carved into the skin of your flesh. 

You flushed at the thought of this. You looked around a little more grabbing the robe which hung on the chair in-front of your desk. You stared down at the desk for a moment. Your eyebrows furrowing all your books of research and papers of your project were all gone. Your heart sped up looking all over your apartment for said research to no avail. You froze infront of the mess of your bed realizing where they could’ve gone. Or whom they could’ve gone with. 

Jinx. 

Please do not steal, claim, or repost any of my work. Thank you

[lovecoree]

can you do a smut fic on Felix or hyunjin and they just eat her out till she's begging to stop 😫 please and thank you btw i love your fics especially your bangchan one

omg thank you! I can imagine Hyunjin eating reader out like it’s his last meal! Like he’s just straight up pussy drunk when there having Christmas Eve movie night !

warning; oral sex ( fem receiving ) , not really proof read !

You felt like you were on cloud nine. Your boyfriend, Hyunjin was settled between your legs, giving you immense pleasure as he fucked you on his tongue. Your begging only fueled his energy as he held your legs open wider with his hands as he sucked harshly on your clit causing your body to jolt a little and back arch off the couch.

“Baby- fuck -baby please.” You didn’t know what you were pleading for, but your words couldn’t get out fast enough while you grip his hair, tugging at it which only made Hyunjin groan from the painful yet satisfying pull to his hair.

You honestly didn’t know how you ended in this position. A Christmas Eve movie night turned into you getting eaten out in a heart beat— not that you’re complaining though.

The Christmas movie playing in the background, long forgotten, the nice night view outside the windows as snow passed by and the night moon shining inside, and you, sprawled out on the couch letting your boyfriend eat you out for hours.

“Hyunjin, fuck wait I need a break.” You begged, lips forming into a pout as you whined still feeling sensitive from the past three orgasms your boyfriend made you go through.

Hyunjin mumbled against your sweet cunt, most likely saying something but he couldn’t find the energy to pull away, licking up your arousal in the process. It was like his weakness. “Baby I can’t hear you.” Breathing out, you took the opportunity to push his head away for a split second, it was like you could finally breathe.

You moaned at the sight of your boyfriend’s handsome face, the dimly lit living room shined just perfectly on his face to show the glistening arousal on his swollen lips and chin. “I said, just give me one more mamas, just one more please.”

He didn’t even let you respond, his eyes low and hazy, mind drunk off your pussy. You let out a cry as he dived back in between your legs. “Please baby.” Your voice came out in a whisper, too weak to say it louder, energy slowly leaving your body. “Fuck, Hyunjin I can’t!”

“Yes you can, you’re doing so good for me.”

Hyunjin moved his hand to rub your clit while tongue fucking you in the process. He looked up at you watching the way you react to his touch. God you look beautiful, your face contorted in pleasure and body shaking from pleasure.

He knew you were close because your moan grew louder and your eyes crossed. He took the initiative to plunge two of his long fingers inside you, curling up inside your sweet spot. He sucked on your clit again, to bring you even closer. “Oh my- fuuck.”

He pulled away from his assault on your clit with a lewd pop, “That’s it mamas, cum for me..god you look so pretty right now.” Hyunjin mumbled, fingers never halting as he fucked them deep inside you in a fast pace. “Shit, I’m cumming.” Hyunjin watched your mouth go wide, a silent cry as the knot in your stomach finally broke, “There you go, there she is.” Hyunjin praised.

Your body slumped into the couch while your boyfriend let you ride out your fourth orgasm. “No more, back up.” You said, finally after calming down. Hyunjin laughed while giving you the most sweetest smile, like he just didn’t eat you out first hours on end.

“Ok ok, no more I promise.” He got up off his knees before helping you up and carrying you to y’all shared bedroom. You looked at him confused for a second, “What about the movie?” Hyunjin only shook his head smirking.

“Oh baby, the movie can wait, I promise not to eat you out, that didn’t apply to me fucking you.”

“Hyunjin!”

[rie-092]

idk what is this but listen—

just imagine ijekiel alpheus, now the head of alpheus dukedom. saw a child, which is you, on the streets. even though he claimed that he already moved on from the princess, now the empress of the empire, there is still this part of him that doesn't.

so, you who had no relationship with the imperial family and your family died because of an accident back then. for some reasons, you had the same eyes as athanasia. and your hair color was similar with ijekiel. so, what did he do? he adopted you as his child!

honestly, ijekiel alpheus was a great dad. this dude has no plan on marrying anyone. and his vassals and lucas and athanasia was practically never stop on telling him to get married. i mean, athanasia was telling that because he doesn't want ijekiel to be alone. while lucas, this little shit, just want to mess up with him and ruin his day. while his vassals just wanted a heir for the alpheus dukedom.

so, why not bring a child from the streets? look, his intentions was clear. he wanted to help you. but the people who saw you with ijekiel thought you were his secret love child or smth like that. like the good ol' manhwa plot, ofc, they spread rumors that the top husband material in the empire wasn't as clean as they expected. does ijekiel cares? ofc, no. this guy was too busy to spoil the hell outta you to make your heart open up to him. i mean, he's your father from now on, so it's normal for a father to spoil his child, right?

but honestly, here's this shitty side of ijekiel that he hides from everyone. this shitty delusional side of him that imagined you as his and athanasia's child. and this side of him became more worse when he brought you with him to the palace. and athanasia, unaware of your jeweled blue eyes behind the contact lenses that you were wearing. thinks that you were really so adorable. so she too, started to spoil you like you were her own child. how adorable, you're like mother and child— of course he was the father— wait, no.

ijekiel always tries his best to calm himself down whenever he sees the sight of you with athanasia. no, this is not right. the empress was already married to that shitty tower master, this is wrong. he should just focus to you— but...

you see, ijekiel never let you meet lucas. even though that guy was practically saying that— "how cold whitey's boy, you're acting like we're not close friends!" when the truth is they are never friends in the first place. besides, he already got athanasia— that's why he will never, as in never give you to him.

but ijekiel was the kind and understanding one. that's why, when you told him you wanted to learn magic. he supported you, he bought you books about magic, he even goes far on asking lucas for help. but you see— ijekiel too can lose his temper.

“ijekiel, where the hell is ( name )?"

that was the first thing that lucas asked as he left your room where he teleported. ijekiel nonchalantly said that you were at his family's villa, after you threw up blood last night because of using too much magic. but boy, lucas was more perceptive than he thought. saying that he should stop spouting bullshits. but ijekiel didn't say anything.

ijekiel was kind— but the truth is he was beginning to lose his mind. he hated the way how you look at lucas the same way you look at him. he hates the way how you and lucas looks more father and child than you and him. he hates the way how you seemed to like lucas praises than his. and the thin thread that left on his patience snapped when you told him how much you idolized lucas.

ahh, that night when he visited you on your new room in the manor. where he put your beloved toys and books, but put a mana restricting chain on your wrists. he couldn't help but to smile. now, it'll be only you and him.

ijekiel was kind, but when someone is threatening his child. he has no choice but to do this, right?

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

notes: idk, but I'm really tempted to make unhinged versions of every green flag manhwa men. anyway, happy 2k followerssss! I'm planning on doing an event to celebrate this, and then i'm going to do the 100+ requests in my inbox. ♪⁠┌⁠|⁠∵⁠|⁠┘⁠♪

pls bear with my laziness (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)

[missdynamighttt]

This is not a request or anything like that, I just wanted to know which MHA guys would be willing to have a threesome, as canon and as less OOC as possible in your opinion!

⋆˚࿔ kia's note ˚⋆ FINALLY FINALLY OH MY GOD IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE. THE REQUESTS I GET ARE NICE BUT THEY ARE KINDA OOC AND PURE ON HARDCORE PORN IM NOT SURE IM USED TO YET.

NO TO THREESOME:

katsuki bakugo, shoto todoroki, tenya iida

honestly? i get these requests but i dont believe they'd be into that or want to do it. its a nice thought but its more that they just want you all to themselves.

they dont believe in sharing. plus, with the lack of intimacy they grew up with, it took AWHILE before yall have mindblowing sex. they won't let another person see how beautiful you look, when its supposed to be all for him.

its more of an ego thing for katsuki. even if you wanted to, his pride couldn't take it. besides, he can take care of you all by himself. he doesn't need another dick, or even a dildo to have you screaming and crying out in pleasure. and if it was a girl, he'd probably just ignore her anyway.

"sure as hell ain't sharin' you, sugar, thats for sure. tch, c'mere, gimme a kiss. i'll show you why my dick's all you need. gonna fuck these stupid ideas outta that pretty little head of yours."

meanwhile, shoto and iida is just reluctant. like i mentioned, it took you awhile in the relationship before hes fucking you so good. it also just feels weird when another person sees him like that, when its only all for you to see.

"my love... as... exciting, as the idea is, i don't think i like it. is that okay? i'm sorry. i'll make it up to you. now spread these legs for me, c'mon. i'll eat you out real good, i promise."

WILLING TO TRY:

sero hanta, kirishima eijirou, midoriya izuku

they wouldn't say outright no but not outright yes either. they're reluctant because another person would see you all vulnerable like that but the idea of bringing you more pleasure gets his dick really hard.

"it.. depends who its with, mi amor. i dont like it but i don't hate it. let's make a list, yeah? narrow it down and shit and we'll see." (y'all end up picking denki.)

"that's.. not what i was expecting. don't get me wrong, i don't hate it. its hot but its a little weird, y'know what i mean? okay, good. who to ask? bakugo would kill me... mina? she would too. but i'll ask." (she said hell yeah)

"oh! um... sure, why not? i'm not sure who we could ask, though.. maybe kacchan? oh! or, uraraka-san maybe. i'll call him and you call her." (both of them said yes but y'all decided on katsuki. you got drunk on both of their dicks real good.)

YES TO THREESOME:

denki kaminari

i think y'all know why he says yes. this man is kinky as shit, no denying that. he's a pervert but he's not a maniac like mineta. the image of you all fucked out taking on 2 cocks or kissing another woman while you're bouncing on his cock and he's eating her out.. its hot.

the challenging thing here was finding someone who was willing to have a threesome with him though. the person who ended up saying yes was sero. i imagine using both of their quirks to real good use, like bondage or shocking your needy clit.

"fuck, fuck, fuck. yeah? you like getting fucked by that, don't cha? c'mon baby, fuck his cock like you mean it, c'mon."

‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia ! ]✧˚₊‧ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧

[wndaswife]

While on a family vacation alongside some of your father’s coworkers’ families, you and your stepmother take some time of the trip to yourselves.

Tags | MDNI: smut, fluff, strap-ons, brief handjob sorta, praise, mommy kink, soft top!wanda maximoff

drabble for matriarchal disturbance

Wanda wrung the last of the shower water from her bikini that she had used to wash away the sand and ocean water then hung it from the balcony of your resort room. 

It didn’t take much begging for your dad to book a separate room for you, as he agreed that you should have your own privacy on vacation. It was a celebratory trip and had something to do with Stark Industries, and a few of his close coworkers, all with high positions within the company, brought their families along too. 

Also, you wanted to have your own room to get some privacy with your stepmother when you could — which, thankfully, turned out to be a rather large amount, since she wasn’t all that entertained being Vision’s trophy wife while he conversed with his friends, which was most of what he’d been doing for the trip so far. 

“Do you want me to hang your swimming things too, Y/N?” Wanda offered sweetly as you laid sprawled out on the bed after your shower together. 

“Yes, please. Thanks,” you told her, opening your eyes and giving her a smile. 

She smiled back at you then took your things, wrung it out, then hung it beside hers. 

Wanda shut the sliding door then removed her towel from her hair, letting brown hair fall in damp waves down her arms. She hung the towel on one of the armchairs then all but leapt into bed beside you, to which you immediately wrapped your arms around her and elicited a giggle from your stepmother. 

“I liked having you to myself today,” you said, hugging her close as she nuzzled her nose into your neck, taking in your freshly-showered scent. 

She hummed in agreement and you questioned, “How much of the evening do you think we’ll have?” 

Wanda laid her head on the pillow and thought for a moment. “A few hours. I think they’re just getting drinks. Your dad will be fast asleep the moment he gets back to the room, so I’ll leave only when you kick me out.” She said that last part with a playful grin. 

“I’m so lucky,” you said, smiling. 

Your stepmother nodded in agreement. “You are,” she said, raising her head from the pillow and kissing you.

Your arm slid down from her waist, your hand slipping under her skimpy silk pajamas shorts and groping her ass. She moaned into your mouth, giving you access to slip your tongue into hers before she took the chance to shift her weight onto her knee and heel of her palm so she could position herself on top of you. 

Lovingly, your other hand moved up the soft curve of her spine then her lower back to cradle the back of her head.

Wanda lifted her head and parted from your lips. “I want to do it,” she panted softly.

“Now?”

She nodded.

“Did you bring it?” she asked.

With a tiny laugh, you answered, “Yeah, of course.”

After getting over her initial bashful reaction to your response, Wanda teased, her fingers dancing against your chest, “Well, I’ll feel quite privileged to be the first to use it on our vacation.”

“The first?” you repeated. “You plan to get in several more good uses while we’re here?”

Wanda ducked her head into the crook of your neck embarrassedly as she laughed. “Hopefully,” she muttered against your skin.

“I’m a bit embarrassed wearing this,” Wanda confessed as she stood between your knees at the edge of the bed while you fastened the strap around her hips. She still had her pink camisole on that matched her shorts which had now been discarded, and she looked quite sexy wearing her pajamas with the strap.

You tightened it, checking in with your stepmother to make sure she was comfortable when she moved her hips and legs around, before leaning back a bit to get a good view. “No, don’t be embarrassed. It suits you.”

“Are you being honest?” she asked, looking up from the silicone to you.

“Honestly, it does,” you answered. “It’s kind of hot knowing you’re a bit embarrassed about it too. Actually, I think you with a cock satisfies more fantasies than I ever thought I had.”

Wanda flushed and she pulled her camisole over her hips. “Y/N…” she said, a bit embarrassed.

You straightened and wrapped an arm around her hips. “Wanda, I’m really serious — I like how it looks on you. Don’t be embarrassed. It’s just me. And you know how much I appreciate how much you always wanna give back, and how much you want to experiment.”

She smiled as she looked down at you, stepping forward into your embrace. “I suppose I could get used to it,” she confessed quietly.

“I know I could,” you said then moved yourself back onto the bed, Wanda following after and crawling on top of you.

“You have to tell me how to do everything, okay?” she asked. “And you have to make sure to tell me exactly how you feel — if I’m hurting you, if I’m making you feel good.”

It wasn’t very hard to figure out that it was in Wanda’s nature to be quite motherly. Ever since your relationship with your stepmother bettered exponentially, there was far more you did together than before. Naturally, Wanda took on a more prominent role in your life, much to her enjoyment. She was able to keep up with what you were doing at school and visit you often. But it seemed that what she liked to do the most was just to care for you; she often asked how you were doing with your classes and what you did during the day and if you ate, and when she came over, she either came with food or cooked for you.

Reassuringly, you told her, “I promise I will.”

Wanda seemed to be comforted by your response, both by your role in what she wanted to try, and in her own skin wearing the strap for the first time.

Moving onto your elbow slightly in order to get a better view of her, you squirted lube into your hand and applied it onto Wanda, who watched observantly with her forearm and knee holding herself up, angling her hips properly.

She then realized that it was extremely true that there was a kind of mind-connection made in wearing the strap like you had told her about when she asked out of curiosity before, because there was this warm flush that she felt crawl up her cheeks and up to her ears as she watched your hand wrap around her, pumping gently along the length and coating it in lube.

You must have heard her breathing quicken, for the way you coated the silicone cock became increasingly teasing, and Wanda could tell, for she felt a pressure develop between her thighs at the way your wrist began rotating rhythmically and how you moved over her tip.

“I bet you’re loving the strap now,” you whispered slyly as Wanda made attempts to regain her composure in order to focus. 

Wanda swallowed and got on both her knees steadying herself on top of you. “How should I do it?” she asked, looking at you for guidance.

Supportively, you took hold of your stepmother’s hand and wrapped it around the base of the strap. “Just position it right where you would enter when we’re both ready, and keep your hand around it until it’s in enough and you can use your hips to enter the rest of the way.”

She nodded then looked back up to you. “I’m not ready yet,” she said, biting her bottom lip.

“It’s okay,” you answered, smiling a little at how cute she looked, simultaneously nervous but also incredibly eager to please you in ways she hadn’t ever before. 

You wrapped your arms around her waist and brought her against you. She lowered to kiss you and brushed your hair out of your face. 

“I have the strap,” she said against your lips, opening her eyes and meeting yours once you opened your own.

“Yes,” you answered, a smile forming.

“We’re on vacation.”

You laughed. “Also yes.”

“These are very big steps for us.”

“I’ll ask you to move into my dorm next.”

Your stepmother looked beautiful when she laughed. She seemed so free and sincere, and you knew that she was able to feel safe with you, and that she felt taken care of. 

You placed your hands on Wanda’s hips and moved her onto her back, causing her to giggle and reach up for your shoulders. You kissed her and slipped a hand under her camisole to grope one of her breasts, eliciting a soft moan from the older woman. She felt her desire begin to heighten when you began kissing her neck, running your tongue up her skin, and nipping softly at her earlobe. 

“Y/N,” she sighed.

“You’re so beautiful,” you uttered against her shoulder as you moved to kiss lower. Her hair had spread out around her head and her moans sounded so delicate. She was the most beautiful woman you’d ever seen, truly. 

Then either side of your face was carefully cupped by Wanda’s hands as she raised your head and kissed your lips, and she shifted her weight and switched positions with you so she was on top again. 

One hand parted from your face while the other moved down between your thighs, fingers gently massaging against your pussy and drawing loose circles around your clit while her other hand continued to cradle the side of your head. 

She raised her head and watched as you moaned and squeezed your eyes shut beneath her. She peppered soft kisses onto your face then parted from your body and straightened onto her knees.

With her hands now on your hips, warm palms moving up and down soothingly, your stepmother asked, “Are you ready, Y/N?”

You nodded. “I’m ready.”

As you watched Wanda shift her focus, cautiously applying a bit more lube to the strap before doing as you had previously shown her and positioning herself with your opening, you realized you were also quite excited for her.

Wanda was normally quite nervous about new things, and she was trying something new for herself no doubt, but also for you, and she was able to because she felt safe with you. 

“The tip is in. I’m going to keep going, okay?” she asked, looking up from between her hips then at you. She advanced when you nodded, one of her hands planted on the bed by your hip holding herself up, and the other delicately rubbing the side of your thigh. 

Then she was far enough that she could rejoin you on top, looking down between your hips as she carefully moved forward. Like you sometimes did, she pulled out and gently thrusted back in so you could adjust to the size. 

She looked up at you when you groaned softly.

“Are you still feeling alright?” she asked. 

You nodded and kissed her forehead. 

Reassured, she continued, and soon she was all the way in. “I think I’m in. Can you feel me?” she asked, applying a bit of pressure by pressing her palm down on your stomach. 

Your back arched slightly from the bed and you moaned. “Yeah, I can feel you,” you answered.

Wanda positioned herself so she was right on top of you, her elbow placed beside your hand with her other hand caressing your hip. Then she began moving her hips with hesitation at first, but picking up speed when she faced little resistance.

When she became quicker, your arms wrapped around her waist, encouraging her. “Wanda, that makes me feel so good,” you told her. 

She pressed the most delicate kiss to your lips and watched your expression intently from above you, watching as you reacted to different speeds, even experimenting with thrusting a bit rougher. 

It seemed you liked it when she kept a rather steady, average pace while thrusting in a bit harshly, for she quickly had you a mess beneath her, grasping for her back and her hair and her waist. 

She let go of your hip and cupped your cheek lovingly. “You’re doing so good, Y/N,” she cooed. Her thumb moved over your cheekbone when your eyebrows furrowed together at a particularly harsh thrust, your lips parting to let out a whine.

“You look so pretty underneath me,” she breathed, panting softly as she continued to fuck you. “So sensitive. You know mommy takes care of you.”

You audibly groaned at the usage of the title. It was always you who called Wanda ‘mommy,’ and though she liked it immensely, she hardly ever used it for herself — she got far too flustered when you used it on her, much less for herself. 

Wanda seemed to have been paying close attention to exactly what you liked, for she was fucking you at the perfect speed and with just the perfect amount of toughness. 

You could hear her efforts in her breathing, in how she panted and how she grunted softly into your ear so you could hear her steady effort in the form of warm exhales against your temple. 

Then she was kissing your temple and the side of your nose, your cheeks and your lips and your chin, kissing around your parted mouth as you moaned declarations of how good she was making you feel. 

“Y/N, you’re so beautiful,” your stepmother sighed, kissing the tip of your nose before tucking her hand under your shirt and lifting it above your breasts. She made brief eye contact with you before she wrapped her lips around one of your nipples, flicking her tongue over it in her mouth. 

You arched your back and Wanda picked up speed, wanting to hear you louder, more desperate for her. 

“I’m gonna come,” you whimpered, and your stepmother raised her head from your breasts and repositioned her face above yours. 

She hooked her finger under your chin and made you look up at her. “You can come, Y/N. You’ve been such a good girl,” she told you with a supportive smile. “Come for mommy.” 

Her hand returned to your cheek, stroking it with her thumb tenderly as you came beneath her, your stepmother whispering out a string of praises, telling you things like how pretty you looked and how safe you were with her. 

“There we go.” Wanda pressed a kiss to your lips as you caught your breath. “I’m going to pull out now, okay?”

She raised herself slightly and got onto her knees after you nodded. She pulled out of you slowly then undid the harness, setting it to the side. 

“Was that alright?” Wanda asked once she settled back down, cuddling into your side and looking up from your shoulder. 

“Wanda, that was amazing. You did great,” you told her, stretching yourself out like a cat then wrapping both arms around her. 

Peeking up, she asked with a wide smile, “Really?”

You nodded. “Did you like it?”

“I did,” she answered. “I liked to see you that way. I thought you looked really cute. I liked to know I was making you feel good.”

“Oh, and when you called yourself mommy,” you said, “I loved that.”

Wanda laughed and turned a bit so she could face you better. “I knew you would — that’s why I did it,” she confessed. “I’m glad you did.”

“I’m happy you wanted to experiment with things.”

“Me too. I had fun.” She smiled at you and you kissed her forehead.

“Is extreme bondage next?” you joked. 

Your stepmother scoffed and pushed away from you. “Extreme bondage will never be next.”

[1980shorrorfilm]

eyes without a face

please click! happy 2025 :]!! may this year bring u so much joy i love you

pairing…ellie williams x fem!reader x abby anderson

in which…your relationship with abby doesn’t stop ellie from liking you.

before you read…angst. modern au. pathetic losertron 5000 ellie :[ this is just me really wanting to write #that scene from tpobaw which is a warning within itself. truth or dare trope. established messy relationship with abby. dina gets mistreated by ellie </3 did i mention ellie is a loser

it’s not hard to make ellie uncomfortable.

throw her in a crowded party or put her in a room where you’re clinging to abby, and it’s done. easy. like now. her eyes are betraying her, not daring to blink or look away, while abby’s whispering shit in your ear that has you giggling sweetly.

she can’t hear you, the music and chatter are way too loud, but she already knows what the noise sounds like. it’s when she makes a stupid geeky pun as you’re studying in her dorm, that the light laughter turns her face beet red— another thing that’s not hard to earn from ellie.

not from you, at least.

when your fingertips trace her fern tattoo, leaf to leaf, ellie holding her breath and arm in place. showing up to hang out in one of her hoodies you have assumed are yours by now, she’ll let you believe it, because she doesn’t want to change it.

telling her how smart she is. how funny she is. and some vulnerable, teary-eyed, post-argument with your girlfriend nights, how you wish abby were more like her.

compassionate...understanding...kind. things your girlfriend lacks, you had told her. it was one of the more severe arguments and surely said out of resentment, but ellie secretly and happily took it as a win.

if she was blunt, free from nerves that taunt her regularly, ellie would agree. maybe free you from her. become a villain to abby and her friends, the loved group that already despises ellie and her too close proximity to you, and her entire ‘no good’ existence.

but she would be your hero. that’s how she would like to think of herself— but ellie is very self-aware and knows that’s not a reality in any universe. her confidence is nonexistent, and reaching out to you would be reaching for the stars. two things she will only dream of.

you’re with her, that ellie cannot change that. she shouldn’t even be so fucking invested in you or your relationship.

she almost has her own, after all. sort of. it’s complicated, her and dina never put a label on what they were. she couldn’t use the term ‘distraction’ without seeming like the biggest jackass in history, but that is what she is.

searching for the qualities that you beautifully possess, in an entirely different person, and being disappointed she cannot find them. ellie feels bad about it, but somewhere in between those guilty thoughts, she wonders if it’s the same for you.

if you looked at abby and tried to find her in there somewhere, if the same sad realization that they were nothing alike, and you're with the wrong person, hits you as it does her.

shamefully, the idea makes ellie happy.

watching abby lead you away, out of her eyesight, did not make her happy.

“got us drinks,” dina chirps, plopping down onto the couch beside ellie, the auburn-haired girl honestly not noticing dina had ever left in the first place. she hasn't been paying attention to much besides you.

“thanks,” ellie makes sure to tell her, taking the red solo cup, sniffing it, and scrunching her face. the fuck is in that punch? she doesn’t know, but the brunette doesn’t seem to mind, sipping while nodding her head to the beat of the music playing throughout the house.

ellie, trying to be normal, shows a smile and brings the cup to her lips, gulping down the harsh alcohol all at once. she hates it, and she’s surprised she doesn’t throw it up immediately.

“thirsty?” dina jokes, earning an awkward chuckle from ellie, who is still eyeing the crowd before her, waiting for your reappearance.

maybe it will be without her, and she can finally talk to you alone, free from the prying and judgmental eyes of your damn girlfriend. she could barely even greet you when she arrived, the blonde's arm wrapped around your shoulder, subtly pulling you away after ellie got a ‘hi,’ in. asshole.

she will never know what you see in her. why you complain about her one night and then fuck her the next. she understands you with everything, besides your relations with her— unless she is your distraction. she’s hot and everyone with working eyes can tell. you two look great together, but you don’t work great together. not in ellie’s opinion, anyway.

ellie starts to drift now, the muffled noise of whatever story dina was telling and the noisy crowd blending, a headache of a symphony. or perhaps it’s the vile drink already hurting her head. or both and she should just ask dina if they could leave this stupid fucking party.

then she sees you. alone, visibly upset, locking eyes with her for a split second, but that’s all she needs. you don’t stay still, you’re walking away once more, but ellie thinks of it as an invitation. you liked to be with her when you were sad, even if ellie sucked at processing emotions, or giving any sort of advice regarding them.

you noticed this when she kept her mouth shut after ranting about something wrong abby had done, and poor ellie just didn’t know what to say. she never seemed to. you didn’t take issue with it, because the most important thing was, that she listened to you. she let you sob and held you in her always welcoming arms. it was enough for you, and why you’ll always appreciate ellie’s friendship.

you find yourself in the snowy backyard, colorful lights thrown messily on a large tree that young adults stand beneath, smoking a joint. you’d join them if you had the energy to be around people, but your previously high spirits had now gone. it was something little-- but the little nitpicky things somehow always led to a dramatic feud with your girlfriend.

you let out a deep sigh, taking a few steps away from the door and leaning on the house, everything a bit more quiet. your thoughts aren’t, though, not until you see her from your perpetual vision, making her way toward you. her gaze is heavy, examining you and keeping a small distance as she also leans against the brick exterior.

“something happen?” ellie asks, knowing both the answer and the cause.

“what do you think?”

“right…” ellie nods, face flushing red at your bitter sarcasm, which you regret immediately. all she’s trying to do is help. ellie doesn’t take it to heart, though, recovering quickly with a joke. half joke. “want me to beat her up?”

it earns a light chuckle from you, ellie smiling to herself as result.

“no…no…she just…never mind.”

she chews her lip, keeping her focus on her scribbled converse, wishing you would elaborate. not because she specifically wants to hear about what happened, but so you would. you would say the words aloud, rehashing it, rethinking where your relationship stands with her. that’s what ellie wants most.

“i understand,” ellie says, a safe response. much safer than where she’s about to lead this conversation.

“where is she?”

“hm? i don’t know?” you ask back, confused about abby’s whereabouts being relevant to right now. you don’t even care, you don’t want to see her. you turn to ellie, “why?”

she opens her mouth, then shuts it, and opens it again.

“i mean…if my girlfriend and i fought at some stupid party…i wouldn’t leave her alone…” ellie speaks quietly, nervously, fiddling with her fingers, “especially you…”

you don’t get the last part. not how ellie wants you to, green eyes parting from her shoes and to your face, waiting for a reaction— for the realization that you’re standing out in the cold with her, not your girlfriend, who is seemingly pretending nothing happened while mingling with her group of ghouls.

but after letting her comment linger, you laugh slightly. “isn’t your girlfriend alone in there right now?”

“she’s not my—” ellie corrects you too damn fast, gulping, “we’re just friends.”

just friends. dina would probably wear that desolated frown if she heard ellie say that, the brunette was more interested in ellie than ellie to her, it makes sense ellie could never really help you with your relationship.

she was struggling with hers, or whatever she had going on with dina. you just hope she’s happy, and being taken care of, and feeling loved. you wouldn’t know, she doesn’t talk to you about any of that. like it’s too personal, but nothing was ever too personal between you and ellie. you hadn’t thought so.

“well, your friend is probably wondering where you are…you should go back in.”

“i want to be with you.”

again, she speaks too fast. you’re looking at her with unreadable eyes, and it makes her feel weird.

“i-i want to make sure you’re okay,” ellie adds, your lips curling into a soft smile that turns her pupils heart-shaped. always so selfless, putting you before her or anyone else.

you're not surrounded with many people like that, like ellie, making you feel like a priority instead of a burden. wanting to be with you, instead of feeling like she needs to simply because you're not okay. she's the sweetest girl you know.

“you’re my favorite friend, you know that?” ouch.

ouch ouch ouch. yeah, that’s what she is, but when you say it it sounds wrong. as if it’s diminishing what she truly is to you, which is so much more than that cursed f word. and still, she smiles, only half fake. at least she’s your favorite something, she thinks.

“dina is a lucky girl.”

the words take ellie back for a moment, mouth parting slightly despite not having a thing to say. it’s almost teasing her, surely not intentionally, but ellie would forget about dina— or any single person if you had wanted her to. if you wanted her. do you?

there’s a comfortable beat of silence between you two, the snow now beginning to fall lightly. it doesn’t bother you, but you do shiver, and ellie takes notice. she’s already peeling her brown trucker jacket off before you could protest, knowing if abby had seen it, it would start another fight.

abby thinks you’re closer than you should be, and if you truly believed it was solely a concern because of your relationship, you’d be a respectful partner and listen to her complaints. but it’s not.

it’s personal, a vendetta against ellie and everything that she was that you admired. a loser with hardly any friends, a nerd that doesn’t even belong to this party tonight, a freak that’s obsessed with you...abby wasn’t kind to her.

you defend her, but usually, it makes it worse. you couldn’t fix that— them. especially because it’s mutual, though ellie never flat-out said anything cruel about abby. she just never said anything nice either.

“thank you,” you tell ellie as her jacket engulfs you with warmth, and the spicy scent of sandalwood that you only associate with her. it makes you feel like you’re being hugged tightly by her.

it’s the perfect moment. the party is dying down, and the muffled chatter is even quieter. everything is hushed currently, the blanket of snow coating the ground making sure of it. it’s so peaceful— and intimate. maybe even romantic, ellie mesmerized by how beautiful you appear next to her.

she was always amazed by winter images, how the pale snow has a magical contrast to whatever object is in focus. and right now you look like an angel, one she'll be sure to draw in her journal when she gets the chance. immortalizing a nice memory while also impressing you. a win-win.

and the moment is interrupted. “there you are!”

both of your heads turn to dina, an enthusiastic smile on her face as she approaches you both. she notices ellie’s jacket on you, but unlike abby, dina doesn’t care. she had started messing with ellie well aware of her close relationship with you, actually finding it adorable how much ellie cared for you. dina thinks she’s a great friend; that’s it.

“here i am,” ellie responds, showing a tight-lipped smile. a cup is given to her from dina, the brunette then looking to you. “do you want mine?” she motions to the drink in her hands, “i would’ve brought another but—”

“oh— no, designated driver,” you inform her, dina letting out a quiet ‘oh,’ in return.

“okay, well,” dina redirects the topic, eyes drifting to ellie, “they are playing truth or dare and i want you to play with me.”

“i don’t—” “c’monnn.”

dina places her hand on the sleeve of ellie’s flannel, a gentle grip on her forearm as she attempts to pull her away. from you. ellie really doesn’t want to leave, especially to play a stupid fucking no-good game with people she barely knew, but her feet are already moving with dina.

“have fun,” you tease ellie, catching the rolling of her eyes.

then you’re lonely, again, and you despise it.

you accept the defeat of who will apologize first, pushing yourself off the wall and going inside the house. the music is turned off, a few people talking from the living room, and you scan the area hoping to see her.

you don’t— it’s her friends, a few faces you’re not too familiar with, plus ellie and dina. your eyes meet with ellie’s first, sitting on the wooden floor crisscrossed like a child. then her eyes drift behind you.

“hey.”

abby’s voice nearly makes you jump, hip brushing against yours as she stands next to you. she takes in the same sight, people giggling in a circle on the ground, while ellie williams is staring at her lap, appearing so out of place. abby snorts quietly to herself— you pay no mind to it.

“hey,” you copy, shifting out of the doorway and slipping into the kitchen, not wanting this conversation to be held in front of everyone, and ellie. she follows, somehow only now noticing the jacket that doesn’t belong to you clinging to your body. she forces herself to drop it for the time being.

“i didn’t mean to cause a fight. was stupid,” she apologizes without apologizing, folding her arms, bomber jacket tightening around her biceps. she’s right, it was stupid, so stupid you don’t even remember the exact reasoning, as it was so insignificant— a reason to just let it go.

“it’s fine, baby,” you reassure both her and subconsciously yourself, closing the gap between you two. her head is lowered, still feeling unsure about it, not looking you in the eye.

your soft hand cradled her jaw, tilting it upward, finally meeting those stormy irises of hers. they seem so distant, like you cannot look through her and understand anything she is feeling— or thinking. you can’t help but wonder if it’s due to the slowly fleeting tension, or something more. something too much to unpack in a house party.

your lip twitches, “we’re okay.”

abby accepts that, as do you.

the room over is suddenly and loudly in an uproar, abby and you sharing an exchanged look, knowing it was probably something very stupid— and probably abby’s friends. your friends.

“they’re having fun,” abby points on the obvious, a switch in her demeanor that you recognize. she’s tipsy and hungry for you.

you sigh her name when her hands find your sides, dipping her head into your neck to kiss the area. she's taking advantage of the empty kitchen, subtly walking you into the nearest counter, still devoted to the soft flesh of your throat.

you give in, shutting your eyes in bliss for a split moment, before the room over is once again in a loud fit of laughter. it’s too distracting for a make out session.

“let's just—” you gently push her away, ignoring the groan that came with it, “—join them.”

“wha—”

you pull her with you to the other room, dragging her to where ellie sits, and inserting yourselves in the game of truth or dare.

you, of course, next to her, knees nearly brushing, while abby is on the other side of you, a gap between you. the women meet eyes briefly, but leave it at that.

ellie is agitated— she feels hot, not in a good way. maybe it’s the mysterious alcohol, or maybe it’s the fact abby is by your side again. a sight she already dreads, but now, after you made it abundantly clear she had upset you, and you just move on from it. it was easy, and so hard for ellie to witness again and again and again.

dina puts her hand on her thigh, squeezing as she chuckles, bringing ellie back from her dire mind. she tries to mirror everyone else in the room, a bleak smile that doesn't make it obvious she's not enjoying her time here.

this is boring. she doesn't care about someone being dared to suck the toe of another or having to reveal some dumb secret from a truth. she cares about you— yet looking in your direction only bothers her; the girl next to you bothers her.

ellie hates this.

“earth to ellie,” her head snaps to the direction of the voice, recognizing it as one of your better friends made through abby, nora. “truth or dare?”

“i— uh,” she wants to say truth, but she means to say truth, but it doesn’t leave her lips. “d-dare.”

you’re surprised. she's surprised. ellie is often shy in settings like these, especially around your friends where she feels the need to watch everything she says and does. luckily, she's cheered on, everyone expecting her to play it safe, or in meaner terms, be a pussy.

you’re also glad ellie’s fate is in the hands of someone you trust, someone who wasn’t harsh on ellie or your friendship with her. it’s an easy dare, something that doesn’t embarrass her at all, and make her the laughing stock.

“i dare you to…” nora speaks, looking between ellie and dina, “kiss the prettiest girl in the room.”

such an easy dare, it’s almost lame, those aware of ellie and dina being a duo now, groaning to themselves.

but ellie doesn’t do anything.

she’s frozen, not even looking in dina’s direction, but rather yours. you think she’s searching your eyes for courage, but you don’t know what for. this shouldn’t be difficult. seconds are passing, everyone waiting for her to get it over with so they can continue the game.

just kiss her.

ellie can’t. she can’t break eye contact with you. and it’s not hard to understand why that is, your cheeks burning up while the rest of the room seems to go dead silent; also realizing what was playing out before them.

“i’m…i’m sorry,” she speaks hardly above a whisper, low mumblings from around her that embarrass her even more. judgement. it is possibly the worst thing she could’ve done, an awkward tension now between her and dina, and you and her. ellie wasn’t working up the courage to kiss dina in the first place. it was you.

but she wouldn’t do that— only in her head, watching the scene play out while everyone is watching her.

ellie quickly gets up, muttering something you don’t catch, and swiftly walks away. she heads to the front door, everyone’s short attention span already moving on, continuing the game. you cannot.

you stand up, a hand on yours holding you in place, preventing you from moving. you look down at abby and her pleading eyes, letting them do the talking. don’t follow her. stay.

you don’t. you retreat your hand, glancing at a distracted dina who was sipping on her drink, probably trying to ignore what ellie had just done, and you leave the living room.

you too exit the house, spotting ellie approach her truck across the street. you call her name out, the woman hardly turning her head over her shoulder, continuing to get inside the red vehicle. you understand she doesn’t want to show her face now, but she cannot hide from you. no, this has to be addressed.

even if you don’t really know what to say, or how to say it. you jog to her car, welcoming yourself inside, boring your eyes into her, while hers are on the windshield, snowflakes coating the glass.

“what was that, ellie?” you ask her, a soft tone as if you’re trying to understand her, rather than pass judgment. she’s sensitive, and she’s also shown empathy to you in times you’ve made mistakes. but that’s the problem— it wasn’t a mistake. she wanted to kiss you. there was no doubt about it.

“i’m with abby,” you continue when she stays quiet, “and you’re with—”

“no, i’m fucking not,” ellie cuts you off before her name leaves your lips, finally finding the strength to look at you. her brows are lowered, shaking her head, visibly irritated. “we aren’t— i don’t want —i want you.”

there it is. you mentally flinch at the confession, a confirmation on her feelings for you; something that cannot be undone and now will haunt you moving forward. it’s not like you can say the words back, because what you said is true. you are with abby.

your friendship with ellie is a friendship. you sigh her name, lowering your head. for some reason, ellie had hoped this moment would come and it would be different. something out of a coming-of-age film, you coming to terms with feelings she’d like to pretend you had for her. abandoning your girlfriend for her.

but you’re too sweet, and that simply is not happening.

“you...you know that i love you.”

she makes it worse. it has been said between you several times, but not like this. she means it in an entirely different, much deeper, meaning.

you don’t reply.

her brows tilt down, tears beginning to form as her body feels on fire. she’s not overcome with pure sadness, she’s frustrated. really fucking frustrated and confused and feeling alone with the feelings, wondering why you’re so calm— like you don’t care.

she thought you did, but she thinks lots of things about you. the idea that maybe, just maybe, it was mutual. you treated her like it was, you made her feel the most loved compared to everyone else in her life, because you knew the most.

the things that brought her joy, that you went out of your way to fill her life with.

a trading card from ebay. a vinyl she spoke about once. her gas station order after getting high together. the kindest things done with the purest intentions, and nothing more. she’s not ungrateful— she just doesn’t get it. she doesn’t want to.

“y-you can’t not feel something,” ellie sounds like she’s trying to convince you, stages of grief already settling inside her. denial, lots of it.

“ellie—” “you can’t.”

“i don’t,” you rush the words out, voice raising an almost unnoticeable level, but still makes ellie sink into her seat. those building tears are now free, a silent cry while she watches you, avoiding to look at her.

“i’m with abby,” you repeat, wondering why it feels like more of a reminder to yourself, than ellie. why it seems like a shield, protecting some sort of lie, or a truth. you take it further, “there was…never…anything between us…”

she talks beneath her breath, “fucking bullshit.”

“ellie.”

“you’re a liar,” ellie doesn’t care for the stern tone in which you spoke her name, a dark cloud of negative emotions hanging over her head. “she’s not fucking here and you’re trying to spare her feelings…what about me?”

you finally look at her, her glossy green eyes appearing so desperate. like you’re her life line. her heart in your hands. but you can’t give in, or give her what she’s yearning for. you cannot give yourself to ellie.

“you’re my best friend, ellie,” you say, watching whatever light leave her eyes at the comment, “and i love you…just not…”

you stop.

ellie holds her breath. a car honks in the distance. an intoxicated person shouts something inaudible. a chill from the cool wind seeps into her truck. the world is moving quickly while everything feels in slow motion for you. then she swallows thickly, “right.”

she wipes her tears, and you take off her jacket that was still on your body, holding it in your lap momentarily. your fingers trace the fabric, a small gulp before you speak in the quietest voice, “you should go…i need to get back before she gets mad.”

there’s a short, dry, scoff laugh from the girl beside you. “wouldn’t want that,” she mutters, “who would you run and cry to?”

there’s venom on her tongue that you’re not familiar with, hell, ellie doesn’t even know where it came from, biting her lip when you look at her with wide eyes; a cold stare that is equivalent to spitting in her face.

“i’m sorry—”

“i’ll tell them you were being stupid. they’ll forget about it next week.”

you had cut her off, a monotone voice that she despises. you open the car door, exiting despite ellie using your name, not wanting the night to end like this. the winter air sends chills down your spine, and yet it’s more comfortable than sharing the same space as ellie in her truck.

“y/n—”

“drive safe.”

her mouth hangs open, watching you shut the car door and walk away, no hesitation or looking back.

you return to the house, to your girlfriend, while she sits lonely in her pickup truck, not being able to turn on the engine. she can’t move. all she can do is cry; but she’s freezing and the tears feel like frost.

she wishes she had you to wipe them away, as she did for you.