#which ... yes i have in fact read and the 2011 script is probably one of my all-time favorite scripts i've EVER studied like dang wow ok

[uniiiquehecrt]

The only other honorable mention is the 'coronation' scene (i still say he deserved a real one .... and him giving it up for real boils my blood but that's a rant for a different day)

He is stately. A contemplative and dignified king. ... Pause. Reluctant acceptance. Thor sits down. ... Thor turns around to see the thousands of people staring back, silently awaiting word from their new King. Now feeling the true weight of the crown, Thor takes a moment...

Unironically the only memorable and emotionally poignant moment in Thor: Gagnarok's final edit of the shooting script is the scene 146, in which Thor looks at himself in the mirror and sees his daddy trauma lost eye for the first time

"Thor takes a beat, as though trying to get used to the sight of the man looking back at him."

[f4wri]

ABOUT ME (cus im bored andd busily forgot)!! VERY LONG CUS I YAP TOO MUCH:

• First Topic!- Facts and fixations..!

(even though I probably have small details to tell cus it’s hard to explain for me stuff and have tightly enclosed interests, learning, etc)

• stars and space..I enjoy to fully immerse myself in further biology aswell (science is all time for me) and learn by reading my science encyclopedia and watching videos of teachers demonstrating/dedicating this topic knowledgeable enough to know (ofc)for atleast a decade. It’s me and the online teachers against the world. Fight meh, (pls don’t, I ain’t intrigued enough for it)

• I love my little pony (if you couldn’t already tell) which has been easily going on for most of my life and never will stop (most lesbian show ever). Continuing on, I adore and know most of the episodes IF I can physically remember ( i DONT have good memory) , and rewatched each episode atleast twice..even when I’m busy. I would talk for hours on end and rant about it! Lol! ( I was born to watch this show ).

•MOSHI MONSTERsZZ, I have the encyclopedia and everything, I loved playing the game and trollling on there to scare everyone and wish I spent more time on it. I used to have figures of them and I personally also dreamt to become one of them as a kid! The series itself helped me interest into reading any kinds of silly stories too (LOVREE ITT). However, it was an on and off story, that’s why I didn’t spent so much. More obsessed now!

•Pokémon!! Gonna catch them alllll!, yes, I had the collections and when my dad brought me all them cards, i couldn’t help but pack them up read through trying to actually get them all! I would talk about it all day (if I ran out of ideas of mlp) running to school to interest others kids (most people were OPPS against this fr..) but that didn’t stop me from watching or playing!! :D Fixation since 2011-idk lol.

•Plants vs zombies..what a time. I remember how I kept this away from everyone, even my parents and uncle (mostly dad). Another one that’s been happening most of my life aswell. However, I got upset when they changed the game itself..I cried cus WTFFFF..they updated it to a basic level game and was no longer interested in it. I LOVE playing the old demo tho fr, best thing ever, just like everything else cus I die when change. I loved it since the DS version was out ( Jan 2011 ).

I have more but too much already..

Second topic!: ME!

I have multiple disabilities. In statement of including of ADHD, attempted Tism, scoliosis (mild/progressing),astigmatism, attempted asthma and breathing problem(s), binge eating disorder, body dysmorphia, eczema (less baffling), motion sickness, indigestion, insomnia, endometriosis (mild/ also progressive), anaemia and maladaptive dreamer.

Third Topic!: Films/Series and music taste..

My favourite films/series (surprised myself).. are Mad Max 1 and 2, Scorpion King, Sonic the Hedgehog 1 and 2 (fixation), FROM (series), Elf, Diary of the wimpy kid, Fast and furious (kinda tired of them lol), Casino Royale, Boisvert (series), Happy meat farms/ Jurassic World (analog horror) Karate Kid (film series), Fury, 1917. I have more but idc to tell!

MUSIC!!:

Nickelback, Fergie, Lapfox Trax, Skillet/ Skrillex, the killers, Rob zombie, PTV, Chiodos, Black eyed peas, three days G, RGTM, Disturbed, Billy idol and Queen.

Fourth Topic: EXTRA HOBBIES

I enjoy..

•English/ literature/storymaking

• Journalism/ diaries

• Drawing/ art

•Fashion and Jewellery

• Baking and cooking

•DIY (labour included so sometimes)

• physiotherapy

•Scripting/animating/editing/computing

•Gaming

•Swimming (sometimes)

[sherlokiness]

The last scene in A Dream of Spring: Sansa with kids?

In a 2011 interview, Daniel Abraham, who adopted AGoT into a comic, was told by GRRM to keep a throwaway line because it is foreshadowing the last scene of ADoS.

There are things about this story that only he knows, and they aren’t all obvious. "There was one scene I had to rework because there's a particular line of dialog -- and you wouldn't know it to look at -- that's important in the last scene of "A Dream of Spring."

See this for more discussions about it.

Daniel published a book in June 2012 while he was working on the serialisation of the comic in Sep 2011. When he said the following in the book he probably was only finished for the script for early AGoT chapters or maybe ACoK:

But A Song of Ice and Fire isn’t open-ended. It does have a conclusion it moves toward, and in fact, the last sentence of the last book is already decided.

For me, the single most important fact about A Song of Ice and Fire is that it will end. Daenerys Targaryen will have a last scene and a last word. Because of my participation in this project, I know the fate of several major characters, and have a good idea of the final plot arc. Even so, the details of where the many, many characters end—where, in fact, Westeros itself ends—aren’t all available to me. They may not even be available to George.

My experience writing my own novels suggests that even at this late stage in the project, the best writers are in an ongoing process of discovery. Even with the last scenes firmly in mind, the process of reaching that place is full of surprises. Some of the ideas and intentions for The Winds of Winter and A Dream of Spring will change in the telling of the tale, because that is the inevitable process of creation. Especially as we near the end, the events at the beginning will take on new significance. Prophecies will unfold in ways that may be as surprising to the author as they are to the reader. Things that are foreshadowed will come to be, or else they won’t.

To add to that, we also have this 2015 Elio and Linda interview.

For example, Daniel Abraham did a comic series adapting A Game of Thrones and there’s one interesting thing that George told him: “You have to keep this line because this line is important for what it happens in the end.

Linda Antonsson: The very last scene… So there’s something in the very first book that will be echoed there.

I think there are two simple requirements.

1. It must be a dialog- so something that a person said to another person that when we see the last scene we will be reminded of.

2. It must be one throwaway line which DA thought he could rework because it would work better during the conversation or just insignificant but had to change back because it was oddly specific.

So, as a Jonsa, I think the quote would be this.

You,” Ned said, kissing her lightly on the brow, “will marry a king and rule his castle, and your sons will be knights and princes and lords and, yes, perhaps even a High Septon.”

Arya screwed up her face. "No," she said, "that's Sansa." She folded up her right leg and resumed her balancing. Ned sighed and left her there.

In fact, this entire thread argues it's this dialogue but they think it's Ned's line.

what seems to get left out of most discussions of what Ned said to Arya, is what ARYA said in response. IMO very significant. She specifically rejects that plan for her life. She says that is not her, it is Sansa.

as I tried to point out, there is absolutely no reason whatsoever to assume that it is Ned's line and not Arya's response that is foreshadowing. Her answer should NOT be simply brushed aside as simply added in to conceal the ending. The scene, IMO is just as likely, if not more so, to be intended as foreshadowing that Sansa will indeed marry a King etc. etc. in spite of the fact that her path seemed headed that way then seemed to veer definitevely away from that when her betrothal to Joffrey ended. The response would also presage Arya's choices later.

We cannot possibly know until we read the final book.

That is what Hippocras from the thread had to say and I am inclined to agree with him that the massive spoiler is not Ned's but Arya's line - which is the one most overlooked as evidenced by them not even taking a second look.

This whole dialogue is relevant because of the word King. In the show, they had changed it to high lord and what's also interesting is Arya's response which is "No, that's not me." So, DA could have also made same mistake like the showrunners did but GRRM had to micromanage him to using the exact quotes to appear in the comic. Before Arya left Gendry, he told him "You'll be a wonderful lord and any lady would be lucky to have you. But I'm not a lady, I never have been. That's not me."

Arya is not a lady but Sansa is. Arya did not marry anyone and Sansa will technically have sons as princes and knights since she's a Queen as the last scene. This coincides with the book quote and the show ending. So the show deliberately left out Jonsa ending?

So in the books maybe it will be like this

Them/Ned: You will marry a King, Arya.

Me/Arya/GRRM: No. That's Sansa.

Coz the show went like this

Them/Ned: You will marry a high lord, Arya.

Arya/GRRM: No. That's not me.

[swiftgronmasterpost]

Late Stage Swiftgron Part 1

Update from November 2021 - I really don’t believe much of this is meaningful at all.  I don’t think they’re sitting around referencing one another on social media or anything but some of Dianna’s interactions with Karlie are interesting Dianna shows up explicitly in Taylor’s life a couple more times so I’m leaving these sections here.;

From here on out everything but the 2014 AMAs and Dianna’s somewhat shocking appearance at Taylor’s 2019 SNL performance are just odd social media shenanigans (or subtweets) between the two, and Taylor appearing to release at least one more song about Dianna (Babe in 2018) (and let’s be honest you can make a strong argument for The 1 being about Dianna as well other post 1989 songs.)

Some of this might be complete crack or coincidence but as you all know I want this to be the most thorough Swiftgron document possible.  

If anything it proves they both certainly still have similar interests and they really do seem to be in touch.

There are some interactions claimed by others to be Swiftgron related that I’m not going to include because they’re just a bit too reachy for me (though I completely support the theorizing!) but in general, if I personally can see the hint of a Swiftgron connection, I’m going to include it here. Draw your own conclusions and take everything, particularly the alleged subtweets/social media shenanigans, with a grain of salt.

And yes there’s tons of Kaylor and other Gaylor/Gaygron content that will be left out of this segment because this masterpost is focused on Swiftgron.  Someday it would be cool to make a giant masterpost/timeline that documents all of it, but for now it’s just going to be Swiftgron stuff. August 26, 2014 - Dianna tweets, and then deletes “Withdrawals, clearly…we had fun.” 

There’s no screen shot of this tweet but some retweets/responses of it remain:

If Dianna is indeed referencing the song Clean (in which their relationship is compared to an addiction hence, “withdrawals” from it) then Taylor would have had to give her advanced knowledge of the song since 1989 did not come out until October 2014.

Taylor did claim she ran 1989 by the muse that inspired it and they were both in LA in late August 2014. Maybe this is when.

November 1, 2014 - Taylor posts about Clean

November 19, 2014 - The 2014 AMAs Kaylorgron Explosion Extravaganza:

Taylor, Karlie, and Dianna are at the event.  Taylor and Karlie are clearly on a date and Dianna is there to present Sam Smith’s performance of I’m not the only one.  Dianna seems a bit out of her element/gloomy when interviewed on the red carpet and Taylor flexes Karlie hard, dancing with her throughout the night and even sitting on her lap during an interview.

Click here for photos, video, gifs, and a live L chat reaction to the night.

December 28, 2014 - The writer for the tv show The Originals, Carina Mackenzie, tweeted that 1989 was about Dianna:

It’s of course notable that someone in the industry is “confirming” Swiftgron on main (particularly before gaylor went mainstream with Kaylor being so obvious in 2015/2016) however what’s even more interesting and notable about this tweet is that an actor named Michael Trevino was on the show The Originals and he dated Jenna Ushkowitz from 2011-2014.

Not only that but Michael was at Dianna’s 26th birthday when Taylor was in attendance as well.

It’s possible that Michael witnessed Swiftgron in real life and spilled a bit to the writer of the TV show he was on.

January 5, 2015 - Taylor likes a Swiftgron related post on Tumblr of Dianna saying she’d go on the road with Taylor and carry her bags at the Giffoni Film Festival in 2012:

February 9, 2015 - Style is released as a single

February 13, 2015 - The Kaylor “Best Friends” on a road trip Vogue Spread comes out.  You’re probably familiar with it but if you aren’t google it.  It’s incredibly romantic and pda filled.

The Style music video is released on this day as well.

We don’t have to go through the whole video but one egg I just have to note is the cave pictured in the MV is in Morocco the same country Dianna seemed to flee to after Swiftgron was outed:

February 14, 2015 - Dianna tweets 143 remember those days (for some reason it has not been deleted) seemingly in response to the Kaylor vogue shoot:

143 is a code that means “I love you” that originated from Mister Rogers.  Both Taylor and Dianna have publicly shown that they are fans of his.  Taylor has even made certain songs 3 minutes and 41 seconds long seemingly referring to this number and wore a Mister Rogers pin on a jacket for a photoshoot once.

Here’s a bit more in depth analysis on the significance of the 143 post.

This tweet is how we know that it is 100% in Dianna’s character to occasionally subtweet Taylor and why a lot of this social media analysis has been done.  

February 16, 2015 - Just two days later Dianna attends a fashion show in which Karlie walks and is noted to “have kept a smirk on her face” during.  Dianna doesn’t clap at the end of the show and looks miserable in photos of the event:

February 17, 2015 - Taylor releases Wonderland

I’m going to pause here and discuss the song Wonderland for a brief moment because it is some of the most incredibly airtight evidence for Swiftgron available.

Dianna’s favorite book of all time is Alice in Wonderland.  She brought it up in interviews all the time, tweeted about it, auctioned off a signed copy of it for charity, her private Tumblr and instagram account are called whosirmesir which is a reference to it, her private Tumblr is filled with reblogs about Alice, and her public Tumblr was called fell down the rabbit hole.

So the fact that Taylor writes an entire song describing a relationship through the lens of and packing full of references to Alice in Wonderland is incredibly interesting.

Let’s take a look at some of these lyrics:

Flashing lights and we, took a wrong turn and we Fell down the rabbit hole (literally Dianna’s tumblr name and url)

Didn't you flash your green eyes at me (Dianna is famous for her beautiful almost hypnotic green eyes and yes they are green)

Haven't you heard what becomes of curious minds (queer coded)

Too in love to think straight (queer coded)

But there were strangers watching And whispers turned to talking And talking turned to screams (seems to reference when they were outed) You searched the world for something else (Dianna very publicly went travelling around the world right after April 2013 when they seem to break up)

Taylor literally put Dianna’s Tumblr URL in the song.  Frankly I’m kind of shocked she released this song at all it is so obviously and clearly about Dianna.  Truly a Swiftgron anthem!

Back to the timeline...

March 8, 2015 - Taylor posts Flamingos for her dad’s birthday:

The caption was “Happy Birthday, Dad. Thanks for all the unconditional love, sarcastic comments, and interesting Christmas presents.”

May 1, 2015 - Dianna posts a flamingo for her birthday (post is now deleted):

The caption was “This is 29. Spoiled rotten. Funny enough, at work they were painting the hallways white and the roses (hallway doors) red, then I actually went to Wonderland (@AliceUnderLdn) and came home to a surprise flamingo. Here we go. Another year around the sun…feeling lucky and loved and loved and lucky.”

Taylor also gave Emily, another rumored ex, a flamingo bandana for her birthday.  i also think it’s odd that Dianna mentions Wonderland specifically in the post.

January 15, 2016 - Dianna’s engagement to Winston is announced and Kaylors notice Taylor is liking sad posts on Tumblr including several posts related to Clean:

November 7, 2016 - Lorde’s birthday party where Kaylor is together in public for the last time for 20 months.

January 5, 2017 - Claire (who is still very close with Taylor) comments on one of Dianna’s Instagram posts):

March 2, 2017 - Dianna posts her James Dean inStyle UK photo to Instagram:

This is actually the second time she has posted this as a throwback photo.  She also posted it on February 4, 2016 with simply the caption “TBT” and did not include the “rebel without a clue” bit which is a reference to James Dean (Rebel Without a Cause). She’s never posted the same TBT photo twice before or after this (as of the writing of this post in October 2020).

It I may be permitted to go real far out on a limb here it’s almost as if she wanted people to connect that photo of her in the UK InStyle magazine to James Dean.  James Dean is of course the way Taylor describes her lover in the song Style.  

At any rate it’s very odd that it’s the only photo she’s posted twice whether it’s related to Taylor or not.

April 25, 2017 - Fans notice Dianna is having her script tattoo removed:

This is significant because a part of the tattoo was dedicated to Alice in Wonderland - it said “We’re all mad here” 

Tattoo removal is a years long process:

So it’s possible she started getting it removed around the time that Wonderland came out.

It’s also possible part of the tattoo was dedicated to Lea (the part that said “here I am”) so this whole removal situation is very interesting.

In 2019 she was still getting it removed and commented this at a Cafe Carlyle session:

"i was like i don't know i wanna explain all my tattoos or the one that i'm getting removed on my side...you know you're like...WHATEVER we're stopping we're moving on"

February 13, 2018 - Dianna attends the Carolina Herrera fashion show, so does Karlie. Dianna is introduced to Karlie by Derek Blasberg and very audibly calls Karlie “gorgeoouusss” as they meet. 

Kayda play “Gorgeous” by Taylor Swift.

Click here to keep reading!

[lamiralami]

TMA Retro 4: Page Turner

I was touched to see some tag commentary on yesterday’s post! Honestly, it gave me an emotion - I am traditionally very anxious about engaging online, it speaks to my immense love of TMA that it brought me to Make A Post At Last. It’s very affirming and reassuring to get some response to my lunatic treatises. Y’all are all right. 💜

Anyway, grab some lighter fluid and a sturdy wastepaper basket, time to torch your haunted novel in MAG 4: Page Turner

It’s ironic that this statement is about the Vast when it is one dense motherfucker. so many dangling plot threads are introduced here, each ready to hook you and start reeling. we’ve been into the meta plot since episode one but this episode is the first time the audience is made aware of such.

seriously: Jurgen Leitner and his library, Gerard Keay and Mary Keay, Michael Crew. the figures introduced in this one thirty-minute installment loom large over the rest of the entire run

you could, your first time through, even file this away as a one-off scary story if not for the fact that Jon knows what’s going on (enjoy it while it lasts, my son). He’s heard of Jurgen Leitner. He alludes to an incident with his library in 1994. Deeper than that, he immediately takes the statement at face value and treats the claims within it as authentic, which is a complete 180° on the first three episodes

and this is such a smart story choice? Jon shapes our perspective into this universe and up until now he’s been utterly dismissive of the validity of the stories he’s telling. To go from practically rolling his eyes to scheduling a meeting with his boss about tracking down more haunted books - that tells us that Jon takes this seriously as a threat. And that makes us take it seriously too, makes us take note that strange books are dangerous things in this world. Any offhand mention of books in future statements will be enough to make us sweat

And! It starts winding the narrative tension on a character level. Why and what does Jon know about Jurgen Leitner and his library? Why does he say his name with such venom? And if he’s so sure about the supernatural nature of these books, why is he so loath to believe the other statements?

(and then it takes 80 + episodes to fully answer these initial questions. Jonny enjoys a slow roasted torment)

love that the statement giver presents, as proof of his iron-clad sanity, the fact that he works as a theatre technician. speaking as someone with an unfinished theatre degree: theatre people are feral my good buddy, try again. I mean, we refuse to say the name of one of the most famous plays in the English language because we think a ghost will trip us for the indiscretion. this is not the trump card you think it is.

a quick sidebar for the Red String Brigade: The Trojan Women is an ancient Greek tragedy that involves a baby being thrown off a city wall. The Seagull’s first published English translation was done by Marian Fell, and also a seagull is a bird and birds can fly. Much Ado About Nothing is very good and you should all watch the version from 2011 with David Tennant and Catherine Tate.

it’s interesting that these early episodes seem to take a cue from urban legends in some respects. Nathan Watts gets extremely drunk at a party and then is almost skinned by a monster while having a smoke. Joshua Gillespie is approached while engaging in a whirlwind of debauchery and has to take care of a cursed coffin after accepting money for what he thinks is a drug trafficking gig. Amy Patel regularly spies on her neighbour for her own entertainment and then has to watch him be replaced by a malevolent entity only she can perceive. and now Dominic Swain pushes past his guilty conscience to score a valuable book off an unknowing charity shop and...gets a bit dizzy and haunted by a phantom stink for a few days then gets ‎£5,000, well anyway, the point is he got spooked! spooked after doing something kind of iffy! that is pure urban legend procedure; modern day fairy tales imparting dire  consequences onto societal transgressions. in a horror story this structure offers a false sense of safety - if you’re a good person, the monster won’t come for you. I can’t recall which upcoming statement yanks the rug out from under us with the first completely random victim.

cannot comprehend how this guy didn’t start plugging the book into google translate the second he got home. that probably saved him from being taken by the book but I am still judging him for not even trying it. yeah you’d be sucked into some sort of sky hell but at least you’d know what’s in the book!! could never be me

(yes I am aware in this universe I would have been eaten years ago. I’ve made my peace with that)

grbookworm1818 slays me. I don’t know which is better, the idea of Gertude carefully curating the most sixty-five-year-old-on-goodreads username she could as a cover for her cursed purchase history, or her actual sixty-five-year-old brain just expressing itself naturally because Gertrude is a very busy woman who doesn’t have time to immerse herself in the ins and outs of internet culture, she just wants to buy the demonic tomes she’s selected for destruction and get on with her day thanks.

did Gertrude know what a meme was? which Archivist could convincingly pose as a millennial best, Gertrude Robinson or Jonathan Sims?

The Key of Solomon and its former keeper, Samuel Liddell MacGregor Mathers, are both real historical figures. the book is basically Renaissance-era magical au fanfic of the Bible, and the man was a 19th century British occultist (and likely drinking buddy of Jonah Magnus) who founded a Very Serious Secret Society. this is a picture of him whiiiiiich rather dispels any sense of menace he’s meant to invoke. what kind of cosplaying nonsense

Mary Keay is such a striking figure. “She was very old and painfully thin, but her head was completely clean shaven, and every square inch of skin I could see was tattooed over with closely-written words in a script I didn’t recognise.” a Look, a vision!

I’m guessing that Our Gerard was blasting heavy metal at 2 am to try to drown out his undead mother while waiting for her manifestation to dissipate. I like to imagine him frequenting Reddit advice posts about dealing with toxic family members, poor lad

oh my gosh Mary refers to Gerard as “her Gerard” is that where Jon got “our Gerard” from?? I feel betrayed??

whatever, I’m reclaiming it. Our Gerard is meant with affection now babey! 

the eye portrait is a bit puzzling. the inscription - ‘“Grant us the sight that we may not know. Grant us the scent that we may not catch. Grant us the sound that we may not call.”’ - could almost be read as an invocation against the Eye? But in general Gerry is fairly Eye-aligned, so...shrug emoji

(honestly my main takeaway from the eye portrait is that it’s finely detailed and near photorealistic so we can add “tortured artist” to our list of Gerard Keay traits and is it any wonder that he’s so Fandom Beloved?)

Mary is Not Good at negotiating sales. her main technique involves terrible tea, bringing up repressed childhood trauma, and getting her magic book to drop animal bones onto customer’s shoes. I’m guessing Pinhole Books was in bad shape even before the police investigation and murder charges.

hahaha, the Vast pushes Dominic down the stairs. classic. you gotta grab what opportunities are available

so did Gerard have to follow Dominic back to his flat and wait awkwardly on the doorstep at like 3 in the morning, hoping none of his neighbours would notice and call the cops

the revelation that Mary’s been dead the whole time! this episode may be more intent on world building and plot set-up but damn if it isn’t still a good little ghost story.

kind of rude of Gerry to just burn a book in this guy’s flat without asking and then steal his wastepaper basket.

Jon may not call the statement giver a liar for once, but never fear, he’s still our petty bastard man. accuses Gertrude of filing statements without reading them, has Sasha double-check Martin’s research, grumps about his general misfortune . he’s stressed from the Archives’ disorder and having flashbacks to a certain picture book but by Jove, that won’t stop him making snide comments on what’s supposed to be an official audio transcription!

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching Good Omens (ALL OF IT)

my favourite novel is now my favourite mini-series and IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL

under the cut: a very long, spoilery six-episode reaction to MY NEW FAVOURITE THING EVER

--

may 31st 07:36pm nz

i posted my episode 1 reaction a couple hours ago but that got ZERO NOTES so i assume people are either avoiding spoilers or aren’t interested, which is fine, but i’m just gonna put all my reactions in one big post so anyone who IS interested doesn’t have to read 6 separate posts c:

edit june 1st 04:08am: btw i watched using a free trial on amazon prime, which i’m pretty sure is worldwide. soooo if yOU WANT TO WATCH THIS, YOU CAN, FOR FREE

--

EPISODE 1: In the Beginning

--

04:03pm

idk how much i’m gonna type, whether i’ll post a reaction to the entire thing in one post....... or how much i’ll end up watching right now

kinda want to spread it out and save it as a treat for after i’ve done some writing

but right now i wanna watch before writing

so maybe i’ll do one ep, write something, then return to this?

edit: aahhaha that didn’t happen

-

04:04pm

I’M SO EXCITED

I’VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG

well... since 2011 when i first read the book

but regardless it’S BEEN 84 YEARS

-

04:05

okay first off i did not know amazon prime did adverts at the start of their videos. so i was like SINCE WHEN WAS CHILDISH GAMBINO/DONALD GLOVER IN GOOD OMENS

and then

yeah

no

either way i thought it was a good opening

-

W A R

NING

cool cool cool cool cool

-

omg i’m used to where the netflix full-screen button is, and on amazon prime that’s the “next episode” button so i gotta be real careful

-

dear god my video quality is TERRIBLE

i.......... i might torrent this show and watch it offline

this is horrendous i can’t see a damn thing

i have never seen pixels this big

-

04:11

okay the quality calmed down after a minute

i loooove the intro, i love that it’s basically word for word from the book

i feel like i’d find it funnier if i hadn’t read the book 3 months ago

-

also? god is a woman? yes

-

04:13

is it just me or does the snek have a slightly david tennant-esque quality about it

-

i’m so happy adam and eve are black

-

04:17

omfg. aziraphale said “ineffable” and now CRAWLEY’S CHECKING HIM OUT TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS ANY JUNK

WOW

...or y’know, looking for a flaming sword. SAME FUCKING THING.

-

also i looove how FLUFFY azi is

-

azi: “do hope i didn’t do the wrong thing”

i fucking love them both uhrgughhhuhuhughuhhh

-

04:21

small sob for cuteness

umbella wings

-

04:23

in the opening titles, crowley just stopped a spaceship and aziraphale turned it into fish

i feel like that was a douglas adams reference and i’m on board

-

04:25

the entire time i read the book, up until i saw video promos of this show, i thought “crowley” was said the same way as spn’s “crowley”, as in “crahwlee”

not “crOhwlee”

i definitely like that they’re different though

both probably named after aleister crowley tbh. all of whom are queer.

-

THOSE SWAYING HIPS

i haven’t found david tennant attractive in about 9 years but WHOOOP HELLO AGAIN

somehow attractive for entirely different reasons than before. like. my taste changed but tHEN

-

i’m on crowley’s side, taking down a cellphone network is VERY ANNOYING

-

04:35

crowley: shitshitshitshithsit

:D

i can’t wait for aziraphale’s big swear

-

04:37

i miss eating sushi

sushi was great

-

04:43

this baby delivery thing is sTRESSFUL

“aaaaurthurrrrr”

nooo

poor lady

-

04:45

“little toesie woesies”

where’s the sister mary loquacious fan club and where do i sign up

-

i’m glad they colour-coded the babies and did the playing card explanation because this part of the book always tied my brain in knots

-

05:00

this is reminding me how utterly gross england is

-

“MY POINT IS............. DOLPHINS”

YES

-

05:06

see in the book

i never once realised that the nanny was crowley in disguise

-

05:11

digging the snake tattoo sideburns

-

05:14

and yeah the short hair looks good

-

05:15

fINALLY crowley called azi “angel”

-

05:17

crowley: “oh no no don’t do your magic act, pleeease”

the magic act scene is one of my fave parts of the book <3

-

05:20

aw man they cut out the best part

i mean i get why

the kids shouted a bunch of gay slurs at aziraphale

and there were no secret service people with guns

but aw mannn

AND THEY CUT OUT THE BIT WITH THE DEAD DOVE AND CROWLEY BRINGS IT BACK TO LIFE FOR AZIRAPHALE

THAT WAS MY SINGLE FAVOURITE BIT OF THE BOOK

AND IT’S GONE

;C

-

OH WAIT

THERE’S THE DOVE

OH GOOD

-

aw man aziraphhale just brought it back himself

i liked it better in the book

they sat on the steps outside and crowley comforted azi and took the dove and fixed it for him, and then it flew off

idk i just had such a perfect image of that moment in my mind and this was..... good but not the same at all

could be gayer

-

05:27

good dog

-

05:28

crowley: *snifsnif* something’s changed

aziraphale: “oh it’s a new cologne, my barber suggeste--”

crowley: “no no i know what you smell like”

gayyyyyyyyyy <3

-

05:31

okay that’s ep 1 watched!!! i’ll watch more maybe later tonight :D

ENJOYING THIS SO FAR

not as gay as expected ........YET

needs 400% more “angel” and “dear”

--

EPISODE 2: The Book

07:42pm

pillar of salt guy: “something smells evil”

the fact crowley smells evil and yet aziraphale likes his company regardless says a lot

-

07:49

fully expected crowley to say “i didn’t fall, i sauntered vaguely downwards”

-

07:50

iiiii’m finding the narrator a little annoying

maybe it’s because i read the book so i know what’s going on

but saying “he has four items to deliver in his van. he works for this postage company and he’s making his first delivery in a formal warzone”.... idk i feel like all of those things could be shown visually? saying it rather than showing it probably saved seven seconds of airtime, but damn

-

07:56

i wonder if the narrator was a later addition to this, for new audience clarity? the script for god just seems a little stilted, idk

edit: i kind of got used to it, but it was still jarring, which i’m sure was the opposite of the intended effect

-

08:09

the saddest newt

-

08:13

she’s kind of exactly how i imagined her in the book

and definitely my fave next to aziraphale and crowley

-

08:17

i feel so bad for crowley’s plants

poor babies

-

08:19

for some reason i imagined her as a redhead. kind of more like mrs weasley

-

08:33

these wee children......... so soft.......... so smol

-

08:25

v happy with the casting for pepper

tiny downside is that we lose another redhead

-

08:29

i find the kids’ conversations hilarious because they’re the same age as harry potter when he goes to hogwarts the first time

idk if this is what eleven year olds are like in real life, but when i read the book i did feel distinctly like they spoke like eight year olds

-

08:35

crowley: “i like spooky. big spooky fan, me”

he just sounds like the tenth doctor

-

08:36

YEEE FINALLY CROWLeY DOING NICE THINGS FOR AZIRAPHALE

-

08:48

"you know, crowley, i’ve always said that deep down you really are a--”

“SHUT IT”

DON’T YOU CALL HIM NICE YOU PRETTY BASTARD

-

loquacious: “sorry to break up an intimate moment”

-

08:45

i imagined anathema’s tripod thing to be about 5 feet tall, not a cute little knee-high thing

-

08:48

freddie mercury: BIIIII CYCLE

BIIIIIIII CYCLE

yeah i was waiting for that

-

crowley: “get in, angel”

HE MURMURED

DON’T MURMUR YOUR TERMS OF ENDEARMENT noo

-

09:00

end of episode 2!!! i freaking loved aziraphale vs the book <3

-

the credits for this ep credit konnie huq as someone named pam but idk who that is? i had a crush on konnie huq as a kid when she was a presenter on “blue peter”

OH WAIT RIGHT the lady on the breakfast show on crowley’s tv. aw such a small part. hoping we’ll see her again later

edit: nope. might rewatch that part to pay more attention. obviously i didn’t even recognise her after like.. 15 years

--

EPISODE 3: Hard Times

09:05pm

brb gotta get some food

-

09:14

and now i wait for food

EPISODE THREE LET’S GO

is this the one that’s just crowley and azi’s backstory?

-

09:16

i can’t even put my finger on why but he’s getting more attractive

-

09:21

ah yes

aziraphale is eating shellfish and trying to tempt crowley

“oh... that’s your job”

i love this part of their dynamic

-

09:29

i adore when crowley makes aziraphale smile <3

-

09:43

SAUNTERED VAGUELY DOWNWARDS

YEE

-

i like seeing how crowley’s sunglasses differ throughout history

-

09:36

“if they knew i’d been... fraternising”

this is such a forbidden romance i love ittttt

-

09:49

CROWLEY SAVED THE BOOKS

and SOFT VIOLIN PLAYS

THIS IS A FUCKING LOVE STORY

k this is my favourite part of the show so far <3

-

09:50

this angel just fell in love

right in that moment

i see cartoon hearts around him

-

09:54

just had to pause for a second bc there was some broccoli in my tea :c

-

09:56

awwwwwwwwwwwwww 

he got him holy waterrrrrrr

-

UNIVERSAL ANGLE OF HETEROSEXUAL LONGING

-

definitely feeling a lot of “NOW KISS” right about now

-

09:59

LAUGHING BECAUSE THE OPENING CREDITS ARE LITERALLY HALFWAY INTO THE EPISODE

-

10:03

throughout the entire book azi just came across as the kind of person who wore glasses even though glasses were never once mentioned

I AM GLAD TO SEE GLASSES

-

10:12

i like this colour palette and the gold in their makeup

-

10:27

“we can go off together”

omg the world’s ending and crowley’s all RUN AWAY WITH MEEE

-

10:31

okay then

good eyelashes

edit: i also like how their relationship was explained with a simple tap on the wrist: hurry up, you’re on the clock, i’m a sex worker, finish your call because i’m leaving

-

10:32

episode three DONE

these eps don’t feel long enough

maybe that means the pacing is just right? who knows

i feel like i should be doing something other than watching this but..... why

--

EPISODE 4: Saturday Morning Funtime

10:48pm

aziraphale is SOFT and he’s perfect like that <3

fuck u gabriel and your body shaming

-

10:53

i want delivery guy to be okay BUT I READ THE BOOK

so............... i know he will be...... eventually

-

10:55

how did they get photographs taken in the 1600s

-

oh gabriel’s eyes ARE purple, i thought i was seeing them wrong

-

11:02

“maud i love you”

noo ho hoooo

-

11:09

a little douglas adams, definitely

BUT NO PEPPER POT DALEK

AWW

-

11:10

the season is very much jumping between summer and autumn

though i suppose that’s the point, tadfield is just perfect

-

11:12

“which the internet has begun to refer to as the kracken”

i wonder if good omens inadvertently inspired me to write The Wireless a couple of years back. wouldn’t be surprising

edit: no, couldn’t have, because the internet wasn’t much of a thing (or a thing at all?) in the book, given its publish date

-

11:20

that’s a v nice dress/top combo

gosh she’s so pretty

-

11:30

crowley: “we can run away together!!! alpha centauri!!!”

aw baby

-

crowley: “i’m going home, angel! i’m getting my stuff, and i am leaving. and when i am up in the stars, i won’t even think about you!!”

THAT WAS A V SAD BREAKUP NOOOOO

why has there not been a single “dear” yet :c

-

11:37

oh no, this part

i loved this in the book but i am NOT READY for maggots

damn you gaiman

-

11:39

he’s so cute

and so gay

-

11:42

uriel: “don’t think your boyfriend in the dark glasses will get you special treatment in hell”

he looks kinda delighted uriel called crowley his boyfriend

i would say he looks worried but this shot was used without context in the trailer and it came across as genuine joy, i actually thought he was looking at crowley

-

11:46

i thought it was a strange throne before

a spider at the centre of a web

dark halo

yeah

-

11:51

oh now she’s a redhead???

-

also i’m glad they implied newt and anathema just kissed because the sex thing was weird in the book

-

okay never mind

hmm

-

12:05

aziraphale: “oh.................ffffUCK.”

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

-

12:07

oh no

it’s happening

oh no

i hate this part but i love what happens because of it

-

12:29am

i have eaten and now i have tea and i am back from MORE BOOKSHOP FIRE

-

EPISODE 5: The Doomsday Option

12:31

nuuuuuuuuuu

and “you’re my best friend” playing while crowley’s tryna call azi

nuuuuuu

-

“somebody killed my best friend”

jfhsdfjsdj

/sobs

-

12:36

freddie mercury: “somebody find me somebody tooo ooo looove”

edit: the narration WRECKED this. it was so dramatic and visually emotional but the voiceover completely screwed with it and it was SO UNNECESSARY.

-

12:46

crowley: “i lost my best friend”

he says, while crying, while talking to that friend

-

THE ONE BOOK HE WANTS IS THE ONE CROWLEY SAVED

THEY’RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL TOGETHER

-

azi wanted to share crowley’s body

and then said they had to get a wiggle on

-

12:52

they cut out the hell’s angels / lesser horsemen

i figured they would, but still a shame

-

1:54

in the book tracy’s “spirit guide” was native american but daaaaaamn that part really needed to go

now she’s irish which is... better, probably

-

01:01

ron: “SHUT. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP”

this guy’s having the time of his life

-

01:03

he wave

-

01:05

1926 bentley; sexiest car right next to the ‘67 chevy impala

-

01:08

omg gotta translate and explain the road

-

01:13

OH NO the maggots are about to happen

they changed the placement of this but it worked for the pacing

-

OH NO

-

k well the maggots were gross but not as bad as i imagined

-

01:31

omg the dog turned upside down rather than be picked up

i wonder if that was intentional

dog: I DO NOT WANT UP

-

01:34

pfff he’s reading “american gods” by neil gaiman

-

01:44am

10/10 flaming car

-

EPISODE 6: The Very Last Day of the Rest of Their Lives

01:51am

here we go...

-

01:55

azi so happy that crowley said the dress suits him <3

-

01:57

rip bentley

-

01:59

aziraphale: “we are here to lick some serious butt!!”

crowley: “kick!! kick, aziraphale, for heaven’s sake”

-

02:06

i freaking love the parallel between the Them and the horsemen in the book

and i love that they did face shots to show the parallel

pepper = war

wensleydale = famine

brian = pollution

adam = death

the parallel is less clear for brian and wensleydale, at least in the show. was more obvious in the book. but at the same time i kind of got confused between them a lot, brian was always eating, but wensleydale was named after cheese

-

02:14

pepper: “i do not endorse everyday sexism”

/STOMPS ON WAR’S FOOT

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

-

02:25

shadwell: “anyone who wants ta get ta the hoore of babylon will have to get past me”

earlier anathema said “boyfriend”

may i point out that all the adults are paired up

shadwell & madame tracy

newt & anathema

......and....

aziraphale and crowley

-

0:28

crowley: “we are FUCKED”

these two need a holiday

-

azi: “come up with something... or.... or i’ll never talk to you again”

he knows crowley loves him aww

perfect blackmail material

-

02:32

they went from trying to kill him to being his gay angel parents real quick

-

02:35

thought they were holding hands for a second there

edit: regardless, a whole damn airfield and they’re 2cm apart

-

02:39

happy ending for the postman, hooray~

-

crowley about the bookshop, softly: “it burned down. remember? you can stay at my place”

awwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-

02:42

CROWLEY GOT HIS CAR BACK AND YET HE TOOK A TAXI

-

02:45

anathema: “why is your car called dick turpin?”

newt: “dick turpin is a famous highwayman. it’s called dick turpin because everywhere it goes, it holds up traffic”

i laughed

this wasn’t in the book and i always wondered

-

02:51

i wonder if holy water wouldn’t burn him because he’s too good

-

03:00

gabriel: “don’t talk to me about the greater good, sunshine, i’m the angel fucking gabriel”

really enjoying these swears

-

03:03

i thought so

-

03:30am

paused for a bit to get ready for bed

i thought it was after 4am but nope

-

“there would be other summers, but not one like this. not ever again”

that genuinely makes me emotional

i think that’s why it’s my favourite book, i can relive that summer with them

-

03:35

omg

-

OH MY GOD

WAIT

THEY

OH MY GOD

THEY WEREN’T IMMUNE, THEY JUST SWAPPED PLACES

HOLY SHIT

edit: THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND I’M GLAD IT’S HERE

-

crowley: “let me tempt you to a spot of lunch?

azi: “~temptation accomplished~!”

THEY’RE SO STINKING CUTE

-

“just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing”

perfect

STILL NO USE OF “DEAR” THOUGH AND IT’S KILLING ME

-

that ending with the bird made me teary-eyed

-

credits: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AS SATAN

WOW

OKAY

AKSFJDSF /snorts

-

the end credits and the song i just wanna bawl my eyes out

i loved this so much and i’m so glad it was GOOD

i loved that they added so many people of colour. in the book i imagined crowley played by alexander siddig (star trek: deep space 9 era) but i guess david tennant makes a pretty good crowley too

i’m trying not to be upset that my favourite scene with the dove and aziraphale’s affectionate use of “dear” was taken out

but 

this was damn good regardless. even gayer in places than in the book

-

this nightingale song is my new favourite song

i never got the reference before

“and as we kissed and said goodnight, an nightingale sang in berkeley square:

GAY

SO GAY

i love

-

the end of the credits “For Terry”

ACTUAL OUT LOUD SOBBING

TERRY YOU WOULD’VE LOVED THIS

NEIL DID YOU PROUD

-

oh this was so beautiful

i’m gonna watch it again with my family probably within the week. i’m so emotionally tender now

azIRAPHALE WAS SO FLUFFY AND CROWLEY WAS SO NICE ABOUT THE BOOKS

ugh i love them more than ever

anathema...... i don’t know if i relate to her, want to be her, look up to her, want her to mentor me, live with her, or find her attractive. maybe all of the above. but she was freaking PERFECT. PE R F E CT 

the casting was so... just right. thank you casting people for anathema.

like... i also didn’t mind the newt/anathema thing so much now. it was hard to tell in the book how much of a relationship they had after, but that smile she gave while lying in bed the morning after, that worked, it said a lot. and i like that it was her choice to burn the prophecy sequel rather than newt’s suggestion

gabriel was amusing. like.. i’m glad he wasn’t in the book. but he was great here. also really like michael and uriel. uriel was so damn beautiful.

i also would really have liked to see a mention of the fact crowley and aziraphale are both agender and potentially asexual. not even a hint of it here. buuuuuut it guess i know from the book. so.

my favourite episode was of course episode 3 with crowley and aziraphale’s 6000 year backstory. especially the 1940s bit where crowley saved the books <3

this show was was less confusing than the book too. ugh it was done so well

OH

we didn’t see where the soldier guy went when aziraphale zapped him away!!! in the book he reappeared safely back home and went out to see his family. to be fair i don’t know whether he died and went to heaven, but it was a nice thing to happen

and they took out the Them’s bully/rival gang, who was led by the third baby from the baby swap, and who won awards for his tropical fish. at least that’s what i remember. which meant the parallel about heaven/hell being rival gangs was lost here. but the parallel between the horsemen and the them was stronger than ever and i loved that.

look, i mean, 10 out of 10, EASY.

favourite thing? yes. yes, absolutely.

--

shoutout to the one time i wrote a Good Omens/Destiel crossover fic The Angel Cake Challenge

IT’S 04:02am THIS TOOK ME 12 HOURS

04:40am AND FORTY MINUTES TO EDIT

congrats if you made it to the end of this!!! thank you for reading <3 AND GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

[migleefulmoments]

lmao Abby is losing her shit because Darren is gonna be singing White Christmas with Lea on her new Christmas album. Apparently that song is "sacred" and can only be sang by Darren and Chris. She seriously needs to get a grip.

Anonymous said: "I can be upset, I think it is a complete slap in the face. there are like 3000 christmas songs, there are THREE that are sacred.   And yes, D should have sad no." Oh look Abby doesn't approve of something Darren is doing AGAIN. Seriously she claims to be his biggest fan but yet complains about everything he does.

Man, I didn’t see this coming. I’m amazed at how deeply emotional they are about a scripted, tv-show couple and a really old song! I might understand  if Abby was a lesbian teenager and this was 2011. It was empowering for gay, lesbian and bisexual kids and young adults to turn on network tv and see people that looked liked them. But times they have a changed. Klaine and Brittana pushed boundaries, but in 2019 there are LGBTQ characters on many shows, Netflix has LGBTQ programing and Ryan Murphy continues to create shows that specifically tell LGBTQ stories-ie Pose and he has created LGBTQ characters for all of his shows because that’s life. He’s continues to normalize LGBTQ characters on his shows: 911 has a main character who is a married lesbian, The Politician has gay characters and its been reported that Rock Hudson will be a character in Hollywood. 

So here we are in 2019 and Abby is devastated that the sacred White Christmas will be covered by Darren and Lea on her new Christmas album. First off, why is the song sacred? Abby mentioned the “Bryant Park riot”-a riot we know never happened. The people “holding the fandom together” were not in the cc fandom when Chris and Darren filmed in Bryant Park. Their “memories” of that day have all been created by watching a few moments of the 11-hour day. I’ve come to realize that the cc theory is built on slowed-down gifs and screenshots. Reality looks nothing like cc so they manipulate the facts to fit their needs. It’s a powerful method because it is so easy to con people into believing inane facts. I am sure that Abby and Flowers and Cassie and Leka fully believe everything they hold near and dear about CrissColfer.  It’s all a lie but they fully believe they are throwing out tried-and-true proven facts. Abby in particular is really baffled why we can’t see what she see. The difference between them and us is that we don’t listen with our eyes. We don’t get information about Darren and Mia by piecing together gifs. That’s it-gifs and screenshots from videos! Can you imagine if a lawyer a police officer  used a gif as evidence? 

Nobody set out to con the tinhatters into believing a fantasy that doesn’t exits-in fact, nobody is conning the fandom-they are conning themselves. They don’t look at the  evidence and form an opinion- they literally create the evidence. Zoom in a photo until you can crop out what you need or clip 1-2 seconds from a longer video, slow it down, add some text and suddenly *BAM* you have proof! Proof with all the drama and emotion to make it feel so much more important than it was. 

How the shit hit the fan:

Leka:

jaci3

I will definitely be purchasing this album! So much talent! Cynthia!! Darren!! Jonathan and Lea!!

notes-from-nowhere

I’m going to take this as a good news👍🏻

ajw720

But no, no, no no. Do not get me wrong, I am thrilled D is on the album, but no, no, no, not a K/laine song. Why?  There are so many Christmas songs out in the world and they chose a K/laine song?  

I have no interest, it can never live up.

I hate 2019.

DRAMA MUCH?

Thanks, but it’s a hard pass for me.

ajw720

I actually have tears in my eyes. This feels like a complete slap in the face. Sorry, but it is and it should not have been this song and I don’t care what you believe, Those songs are sacred to the K/laine fandom whether you think he is married to her or with C or something completely different.  

How many Christmas songs are there to choose from? If she wanted WC, she could have sang it with someone else.

With you @cassie1022 hard pass.  It may seem silly to be this upset about something, but this actually makes me angry.  I feel like K/laine fans are being discarded. That is his LEGACY, something he should be proud of, through that character and that pairing, he and C made a difference, and I do not understand why it needs to constantly be chipped away.  

I have to say the thing that strikes me the most is how obtuse she is about what Glee was the end. It was a mess. I loved Glee but most of the fun by the end was the amazing fanfiction, Fanon Klaine and fandom itself. It was fun to get the song sneak peeks and BTS photos and videos. It was amazing to be a part of a fandom of people who loved what I did. It is amazing to be part of the Chris and Darren stanclub.  But Glee...it was a disaster. .

Leka proves some context for “White Christmas is Sacred” and notice how how many are gifs: 

leka-1998

Excuse you.

WC is so much more than just a song.

(She does know this is a scripted moment right? Darren didn’t actually travel to NYC from Lima with Chris’s dad and someone told him when to skate, what to say, what to sing.). 

“It’s been a whirlwind, but amazing. We got to film at the ice skating rink in Bryant Park, which was just incredible. It was one of the best filming experiences I’ve ever had.”

- Ch/ris Col/fer

(Yes, Darren laid down on the carpet and took a picture of Chris which was  about the most cc thing that happened in 11 hours)

(I have no doubt that these three gifs were created from 1 or 2 seconds of real-time video. These images created the false impression that they spent the day together, gleefully skating and being intimate. Not too long ago, I read a cc post that claimed “Darren spent the day taking care of Chris”.  No, not true- see the videos below for a more realistic representation of the day). )  

#truly this really upsets me

(I guess she is reminding us of how much they mean to the world- eye roll.)  

I tried finding a long video on YouTube-ideally much of the day or even just big chucks of the day but *surprise* nobody bothered to upload that snooze fest. If the day was actually the cc riot the posse believes it was, there would be an 11-hour complication video.

I did find some video that accurately represents what I remember. Basically just imagine 11 hours of the following: 

Chris was pretty shaky when they started skating but by the time they filmed, he was much better. I cannot imagine being on skates for 11- shaky- hours.

Chris skating alone, trying to get more comfortable with skating before filming.

That’s it! That s the totality of what is posted on YouTube from the “Riot”.

The conversation continues; 

Anonymous asked:

White Christmas is literally one of the most cliché christmas songs. The album is just Lea's favorites. Darren has sung White Christmas before and he sounded amazing so it's only natural she would invite him to sing it with her. I get the a lot of things can be frustrating, but good god you all being THIS upset about it is the reason why everyone mock our fandom. It's not even baby it's could outside. At least we know for sure chris is going to be mentioned at some point during the promo.

ajw720 answered: (in victim mode)

Why do you care if I am this upset?  Seriously, let them mock me, they have blogs dedicated to hating me and posts multiple times a day.  I am over it, they are the ones with the sad lives who actually give me power.  

(Nope, not dedicated to “hating you”, I simply debunk your “facts” and “proof” beaus they are not evidence of CrissColfer; Yes, this is unfortunately a negative side effect to disproving your lies- you don’t care if the attention is negative or��positive- you just like the attention. But pointing out the lies and misinformation is more important to me ) 

I can be upset, I think it is a complete slap in the face. there are like 3000 christmas songs, there are THREE that are sacred.   And yes, D should have sad no.  We sit here and swallow everything, including having “D” himself mock and yell at our fandom on SM.  And I virtually defend everything he does, probably to a fault, including holding out that person as his wife. This was easily avoidable.

(well at least you acknowledge that Darren calls out your fandom for their bad behavior on social media. Now would be a good time to really analyze why you think that is. Really sit down and think about why Darren would mock your fandom without a gif or a screenshot to zoom in on. What would drive him to be angry at a ccer?) . 

Sorry, not sorry, don’t like, post on your own blog and stop reading mine if you don’t like the way i represent. Happy to pace the torch. 

(Wow she is happy to pass the torch? Right. ) 

notes-from-nowhere

(Notes comes in and tries to soothe Abby’s fragile nerves).

So, I feel the need to say something. I’m not that much upset for the song mostly because I think it may be the song D picked out if those presented to him so I don’t fully like the idea but it could have been worse. At least all of the involved knows the meaning of the song.

What bothers me though is this kind of attitude, anon. This urgency to come here and to tell to another person what/how/when she should feel about something. Trying to put a weight on it or to dismissed the rightfulness of her feelings.

If this is how she (and everyone else) feels about this, she has the right and the freedom to say it out loud without having to face someone else’s judgement because maybe she has another opinion.

(and the anon has the right to say what she feels-see how that works?)

There are different ways to approach a person to communicate so please next time, think better.

ajw720

Thank you @notes-from-nowhere, hard to believe, the above was at least more respectful than this anon:

This is why I left the fucking fanbase. I still very much agree with the same views and ideas that all of you have, but jesus christ, it’s a SONG. Calm down. I’m just happy whenever D does something that doesn’t envolve PBB. Getting so upset because D is singing a song that he sang with C. Maybe he’s doing it because it reminds him of the Bryant Park shoot? Maybe? Good god, everything is the apocalypse to you guys. Leaving was the best thing I’ve ever done.

I want to remind everyone, I am the one, with a handful of people, keeping this fandom alive and supporting D&C daily,. And just like i can praise them, i can tell them when they hurt me.  This hurt. Maybe I am being overly dramatic and if this was isolated, i would say yes. This is not isolated, it is a continued effort to erase K/laine and CC.  As has been pointed out, not only did they offend K/laine fans in general, it is a knock at our fandom who still to this day celebrate the skating riot.

(Oh lord, she reminds us she is the HBIC, sacrificing everything to keep the fandom together. I love that she believes this is “supporting D&C daily”. Nobody needs to be told the suck everyday.  She support them and so she can criticize them but nonnie cannot criticize her. That makes perfect sense) 

Again literally THOUSANDS of songs to choose from.  Not even sure why L would EVER want to compete with C, but in this case, the fault doesn’t lie with her.  D should have said no.  

(I don’t think Lea is too worried about putting up her vocal chops against Chris’.  The both have great voices)

I am not going to say anything else and just accept that yet another of D’s 2019 projects is something i won’t ever see or hear.  

(once again it’s all about her and her hurt feelings. But this response is at least rationale-if you don’t like the project- skip it. It isn’t Darren’s responsibly to provide 100% Abby approved content)   

I really hope things are going to change, I really, really do.

(But they aren’t..they really aren’t.  This is Darren’s life and I know it’s super stressful because you are trying to hard to make his life work with yours and it just won't You both have very conflicting and opposing goals for Darren’s life. Here’s a protip: Go on a gif-free and zoomed-photo-free diet for a few months. Analyze the information at face value. Learn what PR really means and see how things look.If for no other reason than your own sanity. Stop trying to shove the square peg in the round hole 

#please do not send any more asks on this topic

#i am very upset

ajw720

My feelings aside, WHY in the world would LM EVER want to compete with this? Sorry, but it won’t be half as good. Stupid move and that is trying to remove my bias.

(Her thought processes never ceases to amaze me. Abby and Trump- they start criticizing and they just can’t stop. Lea gets to make her own decisions about what songs she sings, who she’s competitive with, whether she wants to take a chance and put herself out there or not. It just isn’t anyone else’s business. Chris has a beautiful voice but Lea has a stunning voice-she isn’t worried. This is right up there with her criticisms of TSG’s air conditioning, drink names, theme nights and every comment she’s made about a bar she will never go to. 

[redqueenmiku]

A DECADE’S RETROSPECTIVE, REDQUEENMIKU STYLE

Here we are, facing down the start of a brand new decade. This decade has had its ups and downs for everyone. For me, this has been an extremely eventful decade. So much has happened that it’s actually ridiculous.

So, I got to thinking: as we enter 2020, I want to take a look back at my past ten years of existence and really give you guys a peek into my mind. You’re going to learn where I came from and how I got to where I am now. This decade contained my first experiences with the great wide world of posting to the internet and everything that came with it.

Are you ready? Let’s travel back in time to the start of this decade…

2010

2010 started with the final half of my eighth-grade year. I was an awkward child with a million original characters and no friends.

It was pretty sad.

Eighth grade came and went and summer came around. Wow! Look! What’s that?! Toward the end of the summer that year, a certain character named Jake Speed was born and Diametrics, then known as Lightning Speed, officially commenced. If you don’t know about my precious brainchild, Diametrics, don’t worry. I have something big planned for this summer to coincide with the series’ tenth anniversary that’ll answer everyone’s burning questions.

Then, toward the end of the year, after entering ninth grade, something amazing happened. I officially began my long and storied internet posting career.

Where did I start, you ask?...if you have to ask at all, I mean I’ve mentioned this probably a million times by this point but YES. I got my start as Shinymew76 on Nickelodeon’s official Invader Zim message boards. I was just getting my bearings at this time, so I didn’t do all that much of note, but I was getting ready to make my very first power move…

2011

Now, if you don’t know anything about what the Invader Zim message boards were like, we were kind of a hot mess. We were a tight-knit hot mess, though, and dang if we weren’t proud of it. The main activities of the message boards were making OCs and writing fanfiction. You know how sometimes on fanfiction.net you’ll find those really weird stories that are written entirely in script format? That was our bread and butter on the IZ boards. Just about everyone wrote that way. We had to be pretty kid-friendly too. I mean, what you could get away with depended on what our mod, NickZa, was feeling like that day, we were generally pretty restricted.

It’s important to remember that we were also little baby teenagers in a community revolving around Invader Zim.

In 2011, I began to really try to make a name for myself on the message boards. I started a short-lived gameshow series where people could submit their OCs to compete. It was a Total Drama kind of deal but it never really took off all that well. Then, though, I started a fanfiction titled “200 Years From Now”, which told the story of Dib accidentally transporting himself and Gaz to the future, where Zim has been exiled and a new Irken has been assigned to conquer the earth: Miki. Then, Zim returns to earth and something something rebellion to take down the Tallests. I don’t remember most of the story considering a good chunk of it was lost to time, but it definitely existed. The story also featured Zaz and Zelena, other people’s OCs that they submitted to be part of the story.

I don’t know how big that story made it. I really don’t know the scope, so I couldn’t say with certainty how many people read or enjoyed that story. Younger me, however, thought it was THE BEST. Immediately after it ended, I was already planning for a sequel with the same characters, adding villains from the still-thriving Lightning Speed. The story never actually got written and there was no real plan for anything about it aside from what I just told you, but there you go.

I also branched out further, spreading myself to other Nick.com boards with a variety of usernames because I was a coward. One account was 2darcara2, which was meant for the Danny Phantom and TUFF Puppy boards. I never did anything on the latter, the only remnant being an OC for the series known as Agent Darcara Fox. The former, though, came with two OCs, Annette and Aria Spectrelle, and a fanfiction: Eternal Darkness. The story revolved around Danny Phantom meeting Annette, who was being bullied by her older sister, Aria, and something about Aria being ultra-powerful and wanting Danny dead. Again, much of the story is lost to the ages. 2darcara2 also had an Invader Zim OC to coincide with it: Invader Erin, who had dark powers a la Raven from Teen Titans.

In case you couldn’t tell, 2darcara2 was the edgy one.

Then there was the other account: xxpetalxx. This account was meant for the iCarly and Victorious boards and also had her own Invader Zim OC, a human named Miriam. xxpetalxx published two stories, actually. The first was a crossover for Victorious and Invader Zim, where Zim and Dib end up at Hollywood Arts and Dib tries to get Tori to team up with him against Zim. It never finished, but it was something. More importantly, though, there was iMeet a Hero in Hollywood. I can’t even remember which board this went up on, but it was a three-way crossover between iCarly, Victorious, and Lightning Speed. Yeah. I was getting rather crazy here. I’ll talk more about the unfortunates of iMeet a Hero in Hollywood during that big surprise project I teased earlier, but it was a huge mess. Besides the fact that no one cared and I was way out of my element, it just sort of...dropped off the face of the earth.

Back to the main account, though. I lost the Shinymew76 account somewhere along the way, so I had to take up a new handle for my main account, JS712, named after Jake Speed. After getting bored of trying to maintain two secondary accounts, I cut the whole thing off save for iMeet a Hero in Hollywood and decided to just do things with my main account. That was when I decided to check out the miscellaneous boards. One was a board dedicated to original writing. Of course, I dabbled with posting the first story of Lightning Speed there only to have it rejected the first time around, likely because one of the characters was holding a gun. Yeah. This is how strict things were around there. I got it up the second time, but only by getting rid of the gun. The story never garnered any attention either, so that was a waste of time.

Then there was the video game board. This was a place for discussion about anything and everything video games. I remember everyone there making a big fuss about Chuggaconroy and how he was the best lets-player out there. Simpler times, those were.

On those boards, I attempted to launch a Sonic-themed series known as “Adventures in the Z-7 Station”. The series starred a character named Krystal the Hedgehog, who owned a boarding house called the Z-7 Station, where Sonic, Tails, Amy, Cream, Rouge, Shadow, Omega, Vector, Espio, Charmy, and Eggman lived. I also invited people to submit their own OCs to be included in the story.

No one gave a crap.

Even so, I endured, writing a good number of stories for the series. None of them actually went up, though. Sad, isn’t it?

Finally, I extended myself to the Penguins of Madagascar boards, writing a story known as “Penguins of Madagascar Humanized: Unleashed”. The story revolved around the adventures of the penguins, the lemurs, and Marlene, but as humans. There were also humanized versions of Dr. Blowhole and the android version of Skipper that showed up in, like, one episode of the show. They were the villains of the series alongside an OC named Violet. The story actually garnered a fair bit of recognition...until the whole thing randomly disappeared one day. Considering I didn’t archive it at all, that meant the whole thing was completely lost to time.

Of course, the message boards weren’t the only thing I was doing at this time. I was writing other fanfiction on the side too. One of these things was Shadow’s Story, a mega-crossover where Shadow the Hedgehog journeys across a crud-ton of different worlds to find the Chaos Emeralds to defeat an evil force that has made Sonic into its slave. It was one of the dumbest things in the history of ever, but I wouldn’t be mentioning it if it didn’t become important later.

Then, there came the end of the year, namely the date of November 4th. This was the day that I created a DeviantArt account under the handle KristoonzArtist76, and my life changed forever.

Immediately in the next two months I posted artwork for Lightning Speed, Penguins of Madagascar Humanized, 200 Years From Now, Shadow’s Story, and Adventures in the Z-7 Station. There was also the version of Lightning Speed’s first story that went up on the message boards as well as an attempt to recreate Penguins of Madagascar Humanized in comic form...and it was complete garbage.

I also met back up with people from the message boards during this time, seeing as they also had DeviantArt accounts. The most notable of these were Heidi and Mollie, both of which had been a constant presence on the Invader Zim boards and had actually made pretty significant names for themselves there. Mollie, though, had also been significant on the Penguins boards. I believe she even read the Humanized story before it was deleted.

Anyway, that brings us to the end of 2011. Now we move right into…

2012

2012 was when I started to get really frustrated with the boards...and I pretty much just left. You’re not really going to hear anything about the boards from here on out.

The first significant thing about 2012 happened in February: I bought a thirty-five dollar digital drawing tablet off Amazon. It was a cheap, floppy, plastic thing, but, to a younger me, it was the greatest thing ever. It was with that that I started my grand excursion into the world of digital art, starting with Microsoft Paint.

At the end of February, I decided that I was going to do something special to commemorate the leap year. This took the form of a new original story called The ExPERiMENT, which was about two experimental humans with the absolute worst names in existence, Haretaieto and Aidamizumi, nicknamed Hareta and Mizu for short. The two of them were labelled as defective and scheduled for execution, but are saved and brought to a secret compound for...well...undecided reasons. The story was meant to be told in the form of diary entries dated to the actual days each of them were to be released, but this quickly fell apart and ended up spelling the story’s doom. It stopped after the rescue on April 2nd and was never updated again, despite one or two unreleased efforts on my end to revive it.

In another turn of events, I published what I had for Adventures in the Z-7 Station on DeviantArt. The series went on to introduce Sonia and Manic from Sonic Underground, as well as several new OCs: Spright the Raccoon, Leigh the Hedgehog, and Raven the Echidna. A friend’s OC, Silverdust the Husky, was also included.

Then there was the day I logged on to find children staring me in the face. Heidi, one of the friends I had mentioned earlier, had written a story about her Invader Zim OCs that had also involved characters from Lightning Speed. In particular, the main character, also named Heidi, was involved in a romantic relationship with Dnias Speed, as agreed upon and supported by both of us. Then, one day, Heidi posted drawings of a theoretical set of children for the couple.

Those two children were Dante and Jupiter Speed. They will become extremely important later.

Lightning Speed continued to flourish in this time and I was still keeping up with trying to start getting good at digital art. At the end of May, I opened up five request slots, which ended up getting decent reception...from a bunch of bronies.

Did I forget to mention I was in the My Little Pony fandom at this time?

Things continued on from there. I went to prom, I made more Invader Zim OCs, I reached 100 posts on DeviantArt, I quit the message boards, I started learning how to drive, I pared down my ridiculous number of OCs, I read the Warriors series and actually started writing Warriors fanfiction with a whole four clans full of OCs, I made a group on DeviantArt for Lightning Speed, and many things continued as they already had.

Then, September rolled around and everything changed again.

It began with a class trip and the friend I sat next to on the bus. That friend introduced me to many things that day. One of those things was Law of Talos. Law of Talos is a phase in my life that I referenced for two seconds and then continued to haunt me for the rest of eternity.

The more important thing, though, is my first introduction to Vocaloid. On that day in September of 2012, I became a Vocaloid fanatic for the rest of my natural-born life. This would quickly become both a blessing and a curse.

Then, October rolled around and blessed me with Autodesk Sketchbook Pro. I immediately ditched MS Paint and embraced the new art program whole-heartedly. It was a whole new world. Suddenly I had layers and a color wheel and drawings that didn’t look pixellated.

Then, when Christmas came along, it also gave me a shot at a brand new tablet: a real Wacom Bamboo tablet.

I got fed up trying to get used to it and went back to my old tablet, handing the Bamboo off to my sister. I can’t tell if that was a terrible mistake or not, but here we are.

2013

In January of 2013, I discovered MikuMikuDance. MikuMikuDance is a free program that lets one pose and animate 3D models, primarily for use with Vocaloid models but with models for just about everything under the sun existing in one place or another.

This program was the worst thing that ever happened to me period.

Slowly but surely my art started to get completely drowned out by constant MMD images. I had MMD OCs, being crappy recolors of Miku and Rin. I had bizarre lore for different models. I put together those stupid Jewel Hearts that people keep downloading to this very day and I get messages of people favoriting them on DeviantArt constantly and it makes me want to scream because all I did was take a half of a heart someone else had made and just slap the two sides together and recolor it a few times yet it’s literally the most popular thing I’ve ever made someone please end meeeeee.

*ahem*

The MMD stuff wasn’t so bad in 2013, but this is where it started, so I’m obligated to mention it.

As for things that weren’t MMD that happened in 2013, we first have Lightning Speed. In 2013, the final material for the first run of the series was posted on DeviantArt. It wasn’t planned to be the last, but that’s how things worked out. The series still continued outside of DeviantArt, but there’s nothing on the internet to show for it.

There was also the X-Factor OC tournament, a tournament run by Heidi where various Invader Zim characters would be put up against each other in a literary battle of the ages. The character I entered was one I had adopted off the message boards before my departure: Quinn. Three of the tournament’s four rounds took place this year, all of which were wins for Quinn and my admittedly lackluster writing.

2013 also happened to be the time of a monumental shift in fandom for me. I voluntarily left behind the Sonic the Hedgehog fandom. To fill the void, though, I turned to...Koopalings. This, again, was both a blessing and a curse.

And, on top of that, 2013 was the year I attended my very first convention and wore my very first cosplay. I was a hastily-put-together Kagamine Rin. The costume was crap and the convention was just a tiny local event, but I still had fun nonetheless.

Then, at the end of 2013, something incredible happened. Heidi had created a shipping meme some months prior. As her friend, I filled out the meme and, in the process, I jokingly decided to pair Miku up with a cloud. Eventually, the joke devolved, said cloud eventually turning into one certain character of mine that had once had a cloud-like form. Then, that Christmas, I produced my very first annual Christmas shipping picture with said couple: Miku and the character known as Red King.

Yes, dear friends. This is where Red Queen Miku was born.

Oh, I also got a laptop for Christmas. That happened too.

2014

The first thing I did in 2014 was start up a challenge that would quickly become the bane of my existence: the MMD 100 Themes Challenge. This absolutely massive undertaking was the death blow for anything non-MMD related on my DeviantArt account. By that point, I was rarely posting actual art. 80 of 100 themes were posted this year alongside many more MMD images, dwarfing all other posts from this year.

Even through the MMD, though, I found the time and energy to start up my very own OC tournament: the Nightmare Manor OCT. Character submissions for the tournament began in February and, after the final audition phase from April to August, 14 characters had been entered and matched up for round one. After that, round 2 began in December, now down to only 6 participants after eliminations.

2014 was also the year that the first run of Lightning Speed finally came to an official close after over fifty quote-unquote “seasons”, ending officially on September 13th. In its wake, though, emerged Cannonfire, the story of Dante and Jupiter and their quest to escape nonexistence after being removed from their world. At the end of the story, Dante and Jupiter return from the city of those that don’t exist, Cannonfire, now existing in a parallel reality to the Lightning Speed series. The story was written early in 2014 and posted that summer.

Besides that, there were also my first full-fledged fanfictions for the Mario fandom. There was The Show Must Go On, a story about Lemmy Koopa getting kidnapped by a gang of thugs and Iggy and Larry venturing out to try to save him, and Cold Wind, a series of short stories about the Koopalings living in a normal neighborhood, going to a normal school, and doing normal things, based off of events from my own past. A few tertiary stories left over from the original run of Lightning Speed were also posted

Also this year, the final round of the X-Factor OCT began. Quinn ended up winning once again, securing victory over the entire OCT with a piece of writing that, honestly, was rushed and kind of lazy. I’m convinced I only got by because my opponent did literally nothing.

August 2014 would also mark the last time I’d open up requests on DeviantArt, this time only being single-character sketch commissions. I believe it was sometime after this that I abandoned the My Little Pony fandom for good, although not necessarily because of it.

And then tragedy struck. 2014 marked the release of my first Youtube videos featuring terrible voice acting that I tried to pass off as being good. People still watch these things to this day. I hate these videos and everything they stand for.

Most importantly, however, 2014 was the year I graduated from high school and the year I started attending college, going for an Associate’s in Simulation and Game Development at the local community college. I spent my first semester learning the basics and getting adjusted, eventually making my first college friend.

2015

2015 is the year that absolutely everything started changing for the better.

...well, almost everything. First, let’s get the bad news out of the way.

Checking back in on the Nightmare Manor OCT, the tournament’s second round of six contestants garnered a grand total of half an entry. After two separate calls to action, the tournament was abandoned in May without an official statement; a mistake on my part, but I was pretty depressed about the whole thing, so can you really blame me?

The MMD 100 Theme Challenge was also abandoned this year, stopping at theme 97 out of 100. Fun fact: the last three images actually exist. I just never posted them.

Then there was Curtain Call, the sequel to The Show Must Go On. Curtain Call was a disaster and it’s probably the worst fanfiction I’ve ever written besides, well, Shadow’s Story. Please don’t ever read it.

Now for the good news.

Firstly, 2015 was the year that I finally stopped using MMD. Even in the beginning part of the year, I was already posting far less of it. This meant I was focusing more on my art and, when I say that, that’s no exaggeration. 2015 was a huge year of improvement for me, from learning new techniques to adopting a vastly different art style that was more fun for me to use to ditching Autodesk in favor of Krita, allowing me to finally move past my inhibitions and actually use things like pen pressure, which I was too afraid to do in Autodesk, where I’d kept my settings the exact same since 2012. I also obtained a new drawing tablet: a Wacom Intuos 3 given to me by my uncle as a hand-me-down.

The things I wrote this year weren’t anything particularly special, for the most part. Cold Wind continued and Surveyor’s Wings, a crossover involving Larry, Wendy, and Roy Koopa getting transported to the world of Attack on Titan, started up, going into indefinite hiatus a short time later. There was also This is Me, a short one about Larry Koopa accidentally switching bodies with Luigi. Above all of them, though, was In Memoriam Vos, a twisted story where the Koopalings are suddenly thrust into a world that wants Lemmy Koopa dead. This was also the year I created an account on Fanfiction.net, named RedQueenMiku, where I posted “This is Me” and “In Memoriam Vos”.

This year was also the year of the Mushroom Timeline, my first attempt at a Mario timeline that also came with its own map. With that also came my first time arguing a Game Theory video, being that I couldn’t just ignore the fact that their timeline came out the day before I posted my own.

This year was also the year I entered another OC tournament: Origins OCT. I entered Dnias from the Lightning Speed series, partnered with his mental companion of cynical disposition, Yang. The tournament was a blast and I had a lot of fun with it, even with all the mistakes I made in the process. The first three rounds took place this year, all of which I won.

Lightning Speed also received a hard reboot this year, transitioning into the short-lived “Lightning Speed 2”. The first story of this run released this year.

This was also the year that I discovered and subsequently adopted a group of bootleg Koopalings I began affectionately referring to as the Bootleglings. Nonexist was created to coexist beside them later that year. The Sesonia AU was also launched, being an AU that shuffles around Koopalings from both the games and the cartoons and Bootleglings, placing them in a fantasy world heavily themed around the four seasons where magic is a prominent feature. Also, there was KoopaDoopa4321, a joke account I made on DeviantArt. I never did all that much with it, but it existed and I posted some art produced in MS Paint there.

This was also the year I created my Tumblr account, RedQueenMiku, this being the second account of mine to bear this name after the Youtube account the year before (because the Fanfiction account came afterward). Because of this, 2015 was my first year participating in the yearly Tumblr event known as Koopalings Week (as well as the year I created my human designs for the Koopalings). Later in the year, I created a second blog, justkristoonzartist76things, for posting small blurbs and generally ranting out of the way of the main blog. It took me a while to find my footing on Tumblr and get comfortable enough to start posting art, but, eventually, my main blog transitioned from reblog city to a mainly art-focused blog. Two more blogs also popped up toward the end of the year: little-red-dolls, which was dedicated to a dress-up game kick I’d had at the time as a big guilty pleasure that didn’t last that long, and frame-by-frame-mario, a blog devoted to weird inbetweens and animations errors in the Mario cartoons.

Finally, this year had one more significant occurrence: I witnessed my future anime husband, Sakaki Yuya, for the first time over my friend’s shoulder in class. Due to this, I asked my friend to teach me how to play Yugioh. Now you know why I started playing Yugioh. It was all Yuya’s fault for being so handsome.

2016

2016 built a lot upon what 2015 started. In fact, in a lot of ways, I regard it as a continuation of 2015.

2016 was also the year I snagged myself a Core Membership on DeviantArt and finally renamed my account from KristoonzArtist76 to the iconic RedQueenMiku you see today. I also changed the name of my second blog to correspond with this, it becoming justredqueenmiku things. From here on, RedQueenMiku would become a constant handle for me on absolutely everything.

The biggest thing that happened at the start of 2016, though, was me finally playing a certain indie game that had come out the previous year: Undertale. I immediately became obsessed. I drew art for the series, I made a blog specifically for it, rqmundertaleparty, to keep spoilers away from those that didn’t want it, and I undertook the challenge of drawing every single major character from the game, which I ultimately succeeded with, coming out with sixty-two drawings for the challenge.

Then, there were the AUs. Many of my AUs for Undertale at that time were simple derivatives of things I already had, like Sesoniatale, Yangtale (which was planned to have a story, but was scrapped), and Nostritale (based off of the Memoriam series, which had recently gained a new entry in the form of a very basic version of In Memoriam Nostri, which would be expanded upon later). There was also Underfire, an Undertale derivative of Cannonfire that had its own short series of comic strips, and Mariotale, which was my attempt to cast Mario characters in the roles of Undertale characters.

Lastly but most importantly, for April Fools that year, I decided to, as a joke, revive Adventures in the Z-7 Station as an Undertale AU titled Krystaltale. The revival, though, ended up having twisted meta elements that eventually warranted its continuation from the three parts posted on DeviantArt for April Fools. In the AU, Krystal was changed to a skeleton named Lucida, but still retained her memories from her previous incarnation and wished to recreate what she had in this new world she suddenly finds herself in using the powers of resetting and scripting to make events exactly the way she wants them. Sans catches on to them and starts to oppose Lucida, creating the back and forth that would persist for the rest of the series.

Also for April Fools that year, I attempted to start an ask blog on Tumblr for the Bootleglings, titled ask-the-real-koopalings. The blog never took off, however, mostly due to my own lack of motivation.

Also in 2016, Cannonfire received a sequel, Cannonfire 2, in which Dante and Jupiter are brought back to Cannonfire, where this time they would remain alongside another Lightning Speed child, Thicket, and a character that had been scrapped during the transition from Lightning Speed to Lightning Speed 2: Nightmare.

In January of 2016, the final round of the Origins OCT came and went, with myself taking the runner-up spot. Later that year, a second season of Origins would begin, this time with myself entering Dante. After the first round, however, the tournament abruptly ended.

2016 was also the year I finally started watching Yugioh Arc V. I made it through nearly forty episodes this year. I also updated my human Koopaling designs and started doing DeviantArt memes for fun, notably posting the very first version of the first crack lovechild meme I did. My first palette challenge was this year as well and, slowly but surely, I was moving myself away from DeviantArt and toward Tumblr as my primary platform. There was also the first death of KoopaDoopa4321, meant to be on April Fools, but accidentally delayed to April 2nd. This was also the year I changed the anniversary of Lightning Speed from July 12th to July 29th and posted the second and final story of Lightning Speed 2.

Speaking of, there wasn’t a lot of writing that came out from me this year. Besides Krystaltale and Lightning Speed 2, there was a one-shot based on my old headcanons about Bowser’s past titled “Her Name Was Annabel” and a story revolving around Ludwig von Koopa after the birth of Bowser Jr and the subsequent revoking of Ludwig’s birthright that also included elements of Superstar Saga, this one titled “Decomposure”. These went up exclusively on Fanfiction.net along with a cross-post of The Show Must Go On. There was also one more part of Cold Wind that went up on DeviantArt before the series went into indefinite hiatus. Behind the scenes, though, I was already starting up stories for the Sesonia AU, the Bootleglings, the Memoriam series, and multiple things for Undertale including two crossovers and two one-shots. I also received a dare from a friend this year to finally write a sequel to Shadow’s Story in the worst possible way as a great big joke, so that happened too, resulting in Shadow’s Sequel.

On top of all this, I finished the Simulation and Game Development program I was in, our capstone project being producing an RPG titled “Life’s Memory”. It was an extreme prototype of a game, but I believe we accomplished what we set out to do.

Then, at the end of the year, I posted the final awful voice acting video I ever made. It was meant to make fun of the previous ones, but it ended up being cringy in its own right, so I still regret it immensely.

2017

2017 for me started with news of an upcoming move that summer, which immediately sent me into a depression over having to leave behind the place I’d been living for nearly ten years by that point. As a result, I feel into a rather extreme slump. I took on an expression challenge to try to cure my art block, not posting a single finished piece outside of that until the end of February. I started several sketches for images that I never completed and subsequently threw out. I abandoned the frame-by-frame Mario blog after trying to hand it off to someone else with no reception. I didn’t return to DeviantArt until April due to anxiety about the amount of messages piling up from a posting flood at the end of the previous year. Generally, I was just feeling like a piece of garbage.

There wasn’t much that happened in the first part of the year. I was certainly writing more than I was drawing, though. I started two more Cannonfires and a project named “I Can Fix You” that was supposed to go up at the end of that year, but ended up being shoved back. There was also the next story in the Krystaltale saga, “The Mispersonification Ray” which actually did go up on DeviantArt. I did also create the Barian Koopalings AU at the start of this year as well.

Over the course of the year and especially during the move, I started watching more Yugioh Arc V, eventually finishing the series by September. I also watched Yuri on Ice this year. I also got back into the crack love-child meme and, after finishing my second one shortly after the move, I came up with the premise for “The Great S.T.O.R.K. Machine” and created worlds for all the children to live their lives, quickly revamping the first meme shortly after.

Then, on July 29th, I officially revealed Lightning Speed’s final reboot to Diametrics. I’ll talk more about Diametrics in that thing I keep teasing, though, so keep an eye out for that later this year.

Then Koopalings Week 2017 came around, I set unrealistic standards for myself, and it crushed my soul again.

This year also just so happened to be the year that I looked back on my rant on the Game Theory Mario Timeline and said “Yeah, I could have done better”. This led me to start writing theory rebuttals that would eventually turn into full-fledged videos. I created the first version of a video on Game Theory’s Rosalina Unmasked video this year, as well as wrote the first draft of a script on Game Theory’s Mario Timeline and a couple other theories.

Things proceeded as normal into the end of the year. I drew more Arc V art, I started writing my first Arc V fanfictions, I posted the somewhat-sequel to In Memoriam Vos, In Memoriam Eius, I made a Wattpad account that I posted Cannonfire 1 and 2 on and then swiftly abandoned, I drew a piece for Hatsune Miku’s tenth anniversary, I posted a Christmas special for Krystaltale, I made an account for the Yuri on Ice Amino, and…

...oh...right...

that drama started this year…

So, in December of this year, I was approached by a user I’ll keep anonymous for her own sake. This user, who I’ll call “T”, directed my eye toward her DeviantArt account, which contained uncredited drawings of her characters wearing some of the outfits of my Bootlegling designs and Nonexist. I asked for these to be credited and they weren’t. This doesn’t escalate, though, until…

2018

In 2018, the T drama escalated from an argument to an all-out war. I did some things I’m not proud of, but I tried to come at the situation with as much grace and dignity as I could muster. I’m not going into detail because, in the end, it doesn’t matter to the present day—the whole thing is over and no one needs to bring it back up like that—but the only thing worth knowing is that I unintentionally stoked a fire I was ill-prepared to deal with and, somehow, I gained a crud-ton of followers on DeviantArt because of it.

Finally, in April, after T had been ignoring large majorities of my messages and the situation moved far beyond needing my input, I dropped out of the whole thing, making my final statement and leaving it be.

Now I can talk about everything else that happened in 2018. Gracious.

The beginning of 2018 was slow because of the drama debacle, but I started a palette challenge on Tumblr and I drew pieces for Yuri Plisetsky’s fictional birthday and Mar10 Day, along with a third crack love-child meme for The Great S.T.O.R.K. Machine, finally revealing the whole thing on DeviantArt toward the end of the year and even starting on a fourth entry, and I entered a contest on the Yuri on Ice Amino with a picture of Otabek that didn’t end up placing.

April Fools then rolled around and, for 2018, I decided to re-release Shadow’s Story alongside the sequel I’d written two years prior on my newly-acquired AO3 account. The whole thing was massively ridiculous and even included pictures every few paragraphs, just like the original had so many years ago. I don’t know if anyone even caught chapter 19, though...

Summer came, I moved Diametrics’ anniversary to July 31st, I started up a challenge called the RedQueenMiku Redraw Bonanza where I redraw, like, a bajillion old pieces from my past, and I drew pieces and wrote a whole slew of bios for Koopalings Week 2018. Fall came, I went off on Nintendo’s announcement of New Super Mario Bros U Deluxe and the existence of Peachette, I started on a brand-new Mario timeline, I finally posted Roy, I started and subsequently failed my first attempt at a Goretober after only three days, I played Deltarune, I posted a redraw of an image involving Karl from Castle of Nations and Law of Talos that was actually a huge mistake to post, I started a Twitter account, and I created and started taking requests for a brand new challenge called the Yuri Expression Challenge, where I draw characters with expressions from various screencaps of Yuri from Arc V. Brilliant, I know. Praise me for my intelligent brain.

2019

And we finally come to the year we’re leaving behind us tonight: 2019. 2019 has been a heck of a year on its own.

2019, in itself, was a lot like 2017. I started off massively depressed, then, in the summer, we moved again.

In January, we lost our dog and I spiraled into depression again. Between that and computer issues, I didn’t actually do a lot in January. I did, however, join an art group on the Yuri on Ice amino in this time: Artevivo. I posted one more piece for the Yuri Challenge before my desktop failed on me and I was forced to either do art on my quickly-dying laptop or go traditional. The latter is what I did for the first Artevivo prompt post, though I took the former route to make a doodle post announcing my sort-of official return to the Sonic the Hedgehog fandom.

Next up was February. I did a few more traditional doodles, one set of them revealing an Arc V AU known as the Dragonia AU, before I finally got my desktop back online. I drew a couple more pieces after that, including an Artevivo prompt for Valentine’s Day involving Otabek and Mila.

March came with Mar10 day once again and an Artevivo prompt about boy bands in which I made a stupid joke by drawing Yuuri, Victor, and Yurio as Dreamboat Express a la Sonic Boom. I also entered a contest on the Amino for St. Patrick’s Day and, while I ended up just shy of winning the whole shebang, I did place first in my category, earning the title of Emerald Princess. Most importantly, though, I dropped a bunch of titles for future writing projects. Some of them, like “I Can Fix You”, “Yu-Gi-Oh: Arc INFINITE”, “Sesonia: The Dark of Spring”, “In Memoriam Nostri”, and Cannonfires 3 and 4 had already been previously announced, but others like “Tales from a Dark and Stormy Night”, “49”, “Jump Up, Superstar!”, “Memory to Hunt her Down”, and, most notably, “In Memoriam ihr Zerbrechliches Ego”, were brand new announcements.

April came around with a half-hearted failed attempt at an April Fools event that we don’t need to talk about and not much else. There was an Artevivo prompt about Cherry Blossoms, another entry in the Redraw Challenge, and I drew some bears. That was really about it.

In May, I traveled for Animazement 2019, which ended up being a heck of a lot of fun. There was also an Artevivo prompt about sea creatures AND the release of the first real story in “The Great S.T.O.R.K. Machine”’s series on AO3. At the end of the month, though, I had a real scare. I backed up everything on my laptop onto an external hard drive then, about a week after that, my laptop sang its final hurrah, dying to a critical hard drive failure.

June was a much slower month. I drew a few pieces at the beginning of the month, but, by the end, we had already begun our next big move. I managed to squeeze in a Sonic birthday sketch dump before we left and I even got the Artevivo prompt for that month done ahead of time. The rest of the month, though, was pretty much completely dead, as I had to pack up my only remaining computer for the move. At the very end of the month, though, I bought a brand-new laptop, meaning I was officially back in business and better than ever, at that.

July started with me taking on a style challenge on the Amino and just generally drawing a whole heck of a lot. This continued all the way through July.

Then, August came. I kept up with Koopalings Week like I never had before, ending it out with the least fatigue I’d ever felt coming out of a Koopalings week. I also finally finished an enormous piece for Diametrics that I had planned to finish for the anniversary, but that took much longer than expected due to the sheer scale of the piece. There was also an Artevivo prompt about fruit somewhere in there too.

September was a month that I vowed to be productive for considering the previous year’s September I did absolute bupkis. What a productive September it was too. I drew some Sonic characters in Vocaloid outfits, released an Undertale two-shot called “Vodka en Rouge”, added another three entries to the Redraw Bonanza, completed an Artevivo prompt for Fall, and started preparing for another crack at the Goretober I’d failed the previous year by drawing six different practice pictures. We also finally got into our new house this month, so that was great too.

Then, Goretober finally came. Did I succeed this time? Well, no. I managed to get most all of them done, but 27, 28, 29, and 30 were never completed. Even so, I produced a grand total of 25 images this month, which is still absolutely insane. I also made a rule for myself that I couldn’t draw for the same fandom twice, meaning the variety of pieces was vast and I even drew characters that I had never previously drawn like Twelve from Zankyou no Terror, Katara from Avatar the Last Airbender, Sakura from Zombieland Saga, Luluco from Space Patrol Luluco, and Kaoru from Ouran High School Host Club.

When November rolled around, I swore to myself I wouldn’t let myself slump into inactivity like I had after previous challenges like Koopalings Week 2018. With that resolve, I kept drawing. I drew a piece celebrating the new Sonic movie trailer drop. I did a short livestream only one person came to. I drew a piece of steampunk art for the Artevivo prompt. Finally, though, I started the Youtube channel I’d been preparing for for two entire years, RedQueenMiku2, and I started with newly-revamped videos on Rosalina Unmasked and the Game Theory Mario Timeline, just like I’d planned to do years ago.

Finally, we come to the present. December came with three more videos, a Silvaze Christmas piece, a Christmas Aretevivo prompt, and the retrospective you’re reading right now. Really, looking at 2019 as a whole, it’s like what 2017 could have been if I’d done things right. In 2017, I let depression get the best of me and let my work suffer because of it. In 2019, though, I pushed through and vowed not to quit, bettering myself because of it.

That’s the big thing here, really. 2010-2014 was all about me trying to find myself as a young, impressionable teenager, 2015 and 2016 were me discovering where I wanted to be and how I wanted to present myself, and 2017-2019 were me coming to terms with myself and pushing through my own mental roadblocks. Looking at where I started and where I’ve ended up, the difference is staggering. Of course, it has been ten years, after all. Now, as we look ahead to 2020 and the start of a brand new decade, I can only hope things will just keep getting better from here.

Happy 2020, everyone. Cheers.

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

“After the disappointment of the Andrew Garfield-led Amazing Spider-Man movies, everyone’s favorite wallcrawler has been having a renaissance. Entering the Marvel cinematic universe in 2016's Captain America: Civil War, the webslinger fully redeemed himself with well-crafted live-action film in Spider-Man: Homecoming.”

 Yes...okay...that was definitely what Homecoming was....

 “and a wildly successful spin-off film Venom, ”

 I mean financially successful sure...

 “In the midst of all his success, Spider-Man has quietly become one of the most inclusive and socially conscious superheroes of today.”

*raises eyebrow*

 Okay...go on...

 “Last week, it was announced that Spider-Man: Far From Home would feature two out transgender actors playing trans characters, the first big-budget superhero film to do so. Spider-Man: Homecoming also featured a queer character, as well as numerous people of color.”

  Wait who was the queer character in Homecoming?

 “It’s also worth mentioning that Spiderverse included a Jewish version of Peter Parker, who is typically portrayed as either secular or Christian.”

 ....ehhhhhhhhh....yes and no.

 In media adaptations barring maybe one (the 1994 show cos I do not remember where he got married) Spider-Man is portrayed as...I guess secular but really it’s more that they just don’t say anything.

 It’s not that the character is not a believer in a faith per se, especially if you go by older adaptations during times when hardly anyone was secular. It’s just that they, understandably, aren’t saying anything.

 In the comics Peter is some kind of Christian but probably a Protestant (unless you go by Amazing Grace where he is an atheist but that’s hot trash we don’t talk about) but we don’t really talk about it that specifically.

 We just know that he and his family celebrate Christmas and very, very occasionally Aunt May references going to church and that she, Peter and MJ believe in a monothetistic deity they refer to as ‘God’.

 And really apart from the Church thing there is no clue to Peter’s religion and Marvel probably (wisely) would rather keep it that way. He even got married in a civil ceremony!

 However in the SUBTEXT...he’s Jewish. And it’s basically an open secret that he is and always has been Jewish.

 “The Spider-Man video game also featured a wonderful easter egg for queer fans by having a giant rainbow flag, as well as several smaller ones, scattered around the game’s fictionalized New York City map. ”

 I mean that’s wonderful but I wouldn’t call that an Easter Egg so much as...it’s just what you’d find in modern NYC.

 “Even the Venom film got in on the fun, with fans shipping Tom Hardy’s Eddie Brock and the titular male alien-symbiote after the two kissed in the film. Sony even encouraged the pairing, releasing a romantic comedy-esque trailer for the film to promote the home release. While some complained of queer-baiting, most felt that it was all in good fun and included queer people in on the joke, instead of making us the target.”

 Again, good for them but I don’t think that was the movie actively trying to be positive towards queer people.

 Brock and Venom kissed when Venom was bonded to Brock’s ex-fiance and had a pronounced female form, being an adaptation of a character literally called She-Venom.

 And it was based upon a script written in the 1990s so really it was more the movie did it and then people took it as a thing that was shipping Venom and Brock (even though Venom is sexless). Brock and the symbiote have been shipped numerous times in the comics but the subtext has always been that the symbiote, if any sex, is female. In the Spec cartoon it is referred to as Symbi (a pun on Cyndi) and in the Spider-Girl comics it is marked out as female (granted this happens after it’s bonded to a woman).

 And again, headcanon away but like...that probably wasn’t intentional at all Sony were just being goofy or unintionally made something people took a certain way.

 “Indeed, even in the comics, Spider-Man has always been a fairly inclusive hero. Miles Morales was introduced in the early-2000s, taking over the mantel from Peter Parker for several years. ”

 Okay, this is so weird for me to be correcting such a praising point but lets really look at this.

 First of all Miles didn’t take over Peter’s role for several years he did it permanently.

 Second of all Miles is from 2011 so that’s not the early 2000s, that’s the early 2010s, but okay maybe that was a typo.

 Third of all, is it really all that logical to say this franchise that began in 1962 has always been fairly inclusive and then cite a character from 2011 as proof of this? Wouldn’t examples from during the FIRST quarter century have been more apt?

 Fourth of all...eh. Has Spider-Man been fairly inclusive from the start? Yes, no, its complicated.

 Look there were exactly 0 LGBTQ+ characters in Spider-Man until maybe the 1990s and even then I couldn’t off my head tell you who they were. Felicia Hardy is bisexual but we didn’t find out until the 2000s and it was most prominent in an AU. Really the most significant LGBTQ+ character who’s had the fact that they are queer be more than a one off reference was Max Modell and he debuted 2011 and IIRC wasn’t established as queer until 2012. In defence of Spider-Man the Comics Code literally FORBID any character be anything other than straight until the 1990s and even then it was relatively rare, even in X-Men which you’d think it wouldn’t be.

 If we’re talking POC again this one is a bit complicated Glori Grant, Joe Robertson, Randy Robertson are frequently appearing POC characters but not in every run and they aren’t usually as prominent as like Jameson, Aunt May, Harry Osborn, MJ, etc. Characters of other ethnicities are even less frequent and I don’t even know what we should make of Puma/Thomas Fireheart. I mean A for effort, they wanted a Native American character who wasn’t really a villain and wasn’t exactly a sterotype so there is that I guess.

 Again though...most other Marvel franchises decade by decade weren’t much better with this and we should give credit where credit is due to the same guy who created Black Panther writing a nuanced scene where 2 black people in the 60s separated by age discuss different approaches to civil rights with neither being proven right or wrong.

 When it comes to disabled people, outside of evil insane villains, forget it, there is nothing before Flash Thompson in 2008 unless you count Aunt May’s chronically poor health.

 “Spider-Gwen quickly became one of the highest-selling female superhero comics. Spider-Woman was a prominently featured bisexual character, and the female Asian-American hero Silk also had LGBT supporting characters, Rafferty and Lola, who were in a healthy relationship. Additionally, many view vampire villain Morbius, who is getting a spin-off film starring Jared Leto next year, as a metaphor for those suffering during the HIV crisis of the '80s. ”

 Again...Spider-Gwen and Silk are 2010s characters so that’s not ‘always fairly inclusive’.

 I don’t even know if Jessica Drew is bisexual, I’ve never heard that but I don’t think she is.

 Morbius as a metaphor for HIV...MIGHT be true if we are specifically talking about his 1990s solo-book which I’ve never read. But the character as originally created 100% was never about that because he was created in the 1970s before HIV was known about.

 “Unlike his Marvel counterparts Thor, Iron Man and Captain America, Spider-Man’s world has accurately reflected real world diversity for years.”

 ....Not really.

 I’m not even saying Spidey maybe haven’t been comparatively better at it than those guys but he’s deffo not been accurate.

 Plus to be fair to the other guys, Captain America and Iron Man have had at least one major black supporting cast member and in Cap’s case he was fairly candid about social strife and issues.

 And with Thor it’s not that fair to throw shade at him for not reflecting the real world given that 90% of this characters and stories are literally pulled from fantasy and myth. I don’t even know if there are any queer figures in Norse myth let alone poc.

 “While it’s a seemingly simple idea that any of us can be a superhero, it’s sadly still a radical concept in a endlessly growing film genre that has predominetly centers straight cisgender white men. ”

 Well that’s mostly because the comics the movies adapt are about those types of people.

 “That is because relatability and inclusion has always been core to Spider-Man’s appeal and message. It’s why the late Stan Lee decided that, unlike other superheroes who expose parts of their faces, Spider-Man had to wear a full-face mask.”

  Stan Lee only speculated that that was part of Spider-Man’s appeal, he never had any input on that design choice it was all Steve Ditko...who frankly was unlikely to have been thinking about that...

 “Even further, Spider-Man isn’t the king of a country, a billionaire, a woman out of a Greek myth, or a brilliant scientist. He’s just an average high-school kid from Brooklyn who always strives to do the right thing even while struggling to balance his everyday life and hiding a secret identity.”

 WHOA there buddy...Spider-Man isn’t routinely ‘a kid’ nor is he from Brooklyn.

 MILES is from Brooklyn but Peter, as evidenced by that great big caption in Captain America: Civil War, is from QUEENS.

 “And it’s the idea of balancing a secret identity with everyday life that has always allowed Spider-Man to connect with queer audiences long before comic writers were allowed to explicitly include LGBT characters.”

 ...I’m not denying this necesarrilly but whilst i’ve heard stories from poc who connected with Spider-Man I’ve never heard this about LGBTQ+ fans of Spider-Man.

“Indeed, perhaps the strongest part of Spider-Man’s inclusivity is the subtlety to which it has been done. While Black Panther, Black Lightning, and Wonder Woman rightly put issues of identity front and center, Spider-Man’s quiet diversity allows audiences who typically cry “SJWs are ruining my favorite characters” to actually see diversity showcased without it being overt.”

 Errrrrrr...sure....*represses memories of when Miles Morales was first announced*

 Lets um...wait and see what happens when those trans characters show up in the movie this year okay.

[decandantfics]

Fight the World for You

Dec swallowed hard around the lump in his throat. This all felt so surreal, it was like he was there but not actually there – as if it was a bad dream he couldn't wake up from. As he stood at the top of the stairs, he couldn't help but sneak a glance at the other side of ITV's Studio 1 where his partner would normally be standing – waiting to run down the stairs together during rehearsals for this week's Saturday Night Takeaway. His heart clenched at the empty space, and he felt tears coming to his eyes. Furiously, Dec tried to control his emotions and focus on the task at hand – there was a show to do, and it had to be perfect. It felt like the whole world was watching him this week, judging him, and he had never been more scared in his life. He was suddenly snapped out of his thoughts by Chris Power, the director, calling everyone to attention as rehearsals officially began. The music started, and Dec forced his legs to move as he numbly made his way down the stairs towards the stage. As he ran onto the stage, he was again hit by the emptiness of the room. He felt all alone, even though there were at least a couple dozen members of the crew and production team milling around, making adjustments to lighting, camera angles, etc. As the music stopped and the autocue started running, it all became too much for Dec.

                                                           ~~~

He had tried all morning to keep his emotions in check. The script meeting had been horrific, as everyone tried to come up with the best way to address Ant's absence. Everyone was trying their best to act as if everything was normal, but it was just so very awkward. No one seemed to know how to act around Dec, and he felt as if they were all tip toeing around him, afraid to say anything lest he shatter in front of their very eyes. Honestly, he didn't know which was worse – confronting the very painful reality head on, or trying to ignore it and pretend everything was okay. In the end, he decided trying to ignore it was the best option – one well-meaning crew member had told him how sorry they were about what had happened and that they hoped he and Ant were okay. It was all he could do to keep from breaking down. The only response he could muster was a curt nod – studiously avoiding their gaze - and then walking swiftly away so that they wouldn't see his pain-filled eyes brimming with tears.

If he was honest, the past two weeks had been the worst of his life. His world fell apart when his father died in 2011, but he had had so much support from those closest to him that he was able to get through it, no matter how painful it was. But now, he felt all alone. Yes, his family and friends were trying to buoy him up, calling, texting, and just attempting to support him as best they could. Ali had been amazing – so patient and loving, letting him cry bitterly on her chest, comforting him and reassuring him as his whole world fell apart. The only bright spot in his life right now was his baby – their baby – but even that had been partly ruined for him by the press outing their secret. He had gone out to run some errands and had stopped to order a takeaway to be delivered to their home, as Ali wasn't feeling great and neither of them felt like cooking (let's face it, he'd gotten a bit more domesticated since Ali came into his life, but he still couldn't be trusted alone in the kitchen). When he arrived home and made his way through the crowd of paparazzi stationed outside his home – whatever happened to privacy?! – they were shouting something at him that made his blood run cold. "Is it true – is your wife pregnant?" The pictures in the paper the next day showed him looking slightly incredulous, bewildered, angry – who had outed them, was nothing sacred these days? He and Ali had so wanted to keep their baby news a secret for as long as possible. To have their privacy invaded, to be denied the privilege of making this precious announcement to the world in their own time when they were ready – this was the height of cruelty. But, he bitterly thought to himself, what are the press if not cruel. He and Ant had always had a fairly good relationship with the press – they stayed out of trouble for the most part, and although there had been a few exceptions over the years when the press had made their lives hell, they weren't really bothered by paps or brutal tabloid "journalists." As soon as Ant's accident happened, though, that had all changed. Probably forever, Dec suspected. Their entire lives were in limbo right now – he honestly didn't expect either of them would have a career for very much longer. Actually, if the vicious voices of self-doubt in his mind were to be believed, neither of them would have a career after tonight's show.

Dec had always suffered with anxiety and insecurity – he had even described himself as "neurotic, insecure, and self-obsessed" in their autobiography, and with good reason. He would quite frequently suffer from anxiety dreams in the lead-up to a new series of Takeaway, which would result in sleepless nights when the latent worry in his mind took hold of him and made his mind race with everything that could potentially go wrong on the night. But through the years, the one thing he could always rely on to help relieve his nerves, to make him believe in himself, was Ant. Ant was always there for him – sometimes, Dec thought, Ant believed in him too much, almost to the point of blind belief – and could always snap him out of his obsessive worrying with a warm hug and some calm words of wisdom and reassurance. But now, now he was all on his own. Ant was back in rehab, and all communication with him was cut off. Again. 2017's absence had been hard enough on Dec, but then it was different. Ant had the full support of the majority of the public, but most importantly, they were sort of off work at the time. Yes, there were some production meetings and the like for I'm a Celebrity... and SNT, but Dec was mostly able to cope with those on his own fairly well, with the knowledge that Ant was getting better and would be back in time for IAC. This was a whole different kettle of fish. Ant was suddenly ripped completely out of his life, and Dec was abruptly thrust into the spotlight, expected to step up to the plate and carry on as if everything was normal. Nothing was normal. His psyche was in tatters, his confidence had completely vanished, and the level of pressure and expectation being heaped on his shoulders was unlike anything he had ever experienced. He could barely sleep, he merely picked at his food, and his nerves were on edge. Someone had accidentally dropped a microphone onto the stage with a clatter earlier, and he had nearly jumped out of his skin. He couldn't think straight – the combination of exhaustion and nerves further damaging his fractured mind. Stress was also taking its toll – he felt tetchy, like he could snap at any minute – and his face wore the look of someone who was completely broken inside. He was trying to put a brave face on, even trying to crack a few jokes with the crew to raise morale, but the smile never reached his eyes and his laugh sounded horribly forced, even to his own ears. There was no way he was going to get through the show tonight, he told himself. He wasn't capable of doing this all by himself. He was mad for even thinking he could do this, for making the decision to go ahead with these final two shows of the series. He just wanted to crawl into a hole and never come back out again.

                                                          ~~~

Dec was wrenched from his morbid thoughts as he stepped onto his mark and the autocue started running. He opened his mouth to start reading his lines, only to be stopped immediately by Chris. Inwardly, Chris was cringing at what he was going to have to point out to Dec. There was no tactful way of putting this, really. "Dec," Chris said gently, "You're too far to the right of the stage for the camera. Your mark is in the center here, see?" The carefully schooled, stoic expression Dec had been trying so desperately to maintain all morning – all week, in fact – slowly crumbled. He looked over to his right, at the empty space beside him, at the mark that was placed where Ant should be stood beside him. His breath caught in his throat, he felt like someone was choking him, squeezing the life out of him. His vision blurred, his heart painfully clenched and then started racing, the fight or flight instinct kicking in. He knew he had to get out of there before he lost his last shred of dignity. He breathed out a choked, "I need a minute," to Chris, and sprinted off the stage and to his – their – dressing room.

Locking the door behind him, he collapsed onto the sofa, broken sobs clawing their way out of his throat. This was like no other pain he had ever experienced. He knew he had sometimes taken his friendship with Ant and the incredible bond they shared for granted, but it had never really occurred to him that it might all disappear some day. That Ant wouldn't always be by his side, that they could be torn apart so cruelly by life and forced to live without each other. True, Ant was still alive – albeit not very well, mentally or physically – but Dec felt totally isolated and removed from himself. Ant had given him his blessing to carry on and present the final two shows solo – he had even tried to be supportive, despite what a mess he was emotionally and psychologically – and told Dec that he had every faith in him and that he could do this. Dec knew he was far too easy to read for Ant – they had known each other for 29 years, after all – and even though he had tried not to show his anxiety at the prospect of going solo, it was painfully obvious to Ant.

Oh, Ant. Even just thinking about him hurt. There was a constant ache in his heart that just wouldn't go away. He wanted so badly to protect him from everything he was facing right now, but at the same time he was incredibly angry at Ant for having done what he'd done. Never in a million years had he thought this would happen. This was not the Ant he knew, the Ant he'd spent 29 years with. And that was the one thing that kept him going.

Ant knew he had messed up big time, and he had made it clear to Dec that he was determined to make it right and finally get better, once and for all. No more lies, no more secrets, it was time to face his demons and shake them off. Dec wanted nothing more than for Ant to be able to come back and be by his side again, although the prospect of that ever happening seemed very far away at this point in time. He had tearfully told Ant that he would give everything up if Ant could just be happy again. Their career meant nothing compared to their friendship. He loved his job, loved being on the telly and doing everything they do, but if it was a choice between Ant and their career, he would always choose Ant.

Words could not describe the depth of his love for Ant. It actually scared him how much he loved Ant and needed him in his life. He could not contemplate a world without Ant, it would kill him...His heart stopped for a moment. He furiously shook his head, as sobs continued to wrench themselves out of his being, forcing down the thought that had come to mind. Ant was in hospital, he was being watched and cared for. He wouldn't do anything like that, he knew people loved him, right? He knew Dec loved him more than anything, surely he would never leave him alone in the world....He forced the thought out of his mind. There was still a show to rehearse, even if he was having a mental breakdown. He couldn't let everyone down – but more importantly, he couldn't let Ant down. He knew Ant loved their job, and he knew Ant was convinced his own career was over. Well, if he couldn't help Ant with the battle he was currently waging against his demons in rehab – truly the most helpless feeling in the world, being unable to help his one true friend fight the hardest battle of his life – there was still one thing he could do: save their career.

With that thought, he forced himself to take a deep breath. His sobs slowed down to a halt, and even though the ache in his chest didn't relent, he replaced the broken look on his face with his stoic mask of professionalism. But there was a difference now – there was an air of steely determination about him. He was going to make sure Ant still had a career to come back to, if and when he was ready. The world might try to bring them down, tear them apart, put them through untold heartache and pain, but he was more than ready to fight against the world for Ant. Ant is his world, and he would do anything for him. Slowly, Dec pulled himself together, steeling himself for what was to come. Standing up on wobbly legs, he walked to the bathroom and splashed water on his face, trying to rid himself of the red, blotchy look that would broadcast his breakdown to everyone. Having cleaned himself up as best he could, Dec resolutely unlocked his dressing room door and strode back to the studio. He still felt sick with fear every time he thought about going live to the nation that evening. He knew he would probably have at least a couple more panics and/or emotional breakdowns before the show tonight, but for now, he had to put his emotions aside and make sure this was the best show he had ever put on in his life. This was for Ant. He wasn't doing this for ITV, their sponsors, not even the fans anymore. This was about Ant now, and that made it the most important thing he had ever done. If it was the last thing he did, he was going to save their career and give Ant something to hold onto, something to give him hope that not all was lost. No one could stop him now.

[aion-rsa]

Best Movies Coming to Netflix in September 2021

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Fall is here. Almost. Technically we’re in the last grips of summer’s dog days right now, with Americans gearing up for a three-day weekend by the grill. But Netflix at least isn’t ready to leave the sunniest months alone, as indicated by a number of the major films coming to streaming in the next few weeks, including iconic summer spectacles like Jaws… plus Jaws 2 and all those other seaside sequels.

But there’s more than red dye in the water to enjoy in the below outings for those content to stay home as things continue to stay weird out there. From cult classic science fiction to a Spike Lee masterpiece, here is the best of what to expect from your favorite streaming service.

Blade Runner: The Final Cut (1982)

September 1

Of the many versions floating out there in the ether of Ridley Scott’s Blade Runner, this is the best one. Only a slight reworking of the director’s cut—complete with new footage being shot to fix a particularly troublesome wig during one stunt—the Final Cut is a refined distillation of the science fiction thriller that increasingly looks like a masterpiece with each new iteration. Dense, evocative, and strangely beautiful in its fatalism, Blade Runner remains the quintessential blending of sci-fi and noir, and a haunting work about what it means to be human.

Harrison Ford plays Deckard in the film, a laconic cop in an apocalyptic and rain soaked Los Angeles. His beat? To hunt down and exterminate replicants (robots) who disobey their programming and go rogue. Yet to the frustration of early 1982 audiences, and the film’s producers, Blade Runner is not a movie particularly concerned with plot. It’s about the mood evoked by its exquisite nightmare of tomorrow, and the realization that our toasters can be more soulful than you or I.

Clear and Present Danger (1994)

September 1

We know what you’re thinking: Isn’t Jack Ryan over on Amazon? That may be true of his current iteration with actor John Krasinski, but if you want to see Tom Clancy’s originally not-so-super spy done right, we recommend this delightfully dated ‘90s action classic. Starring Harrison Ford at the peak of his grumpy dad phase, Clear and Present Danger is the third Jack Ryan movie and arguably the best one after The Hunt for Red October. Like that other Ryan high bar, there is a winsomely nerdy fascination with the technical side of spycraft at the end of the 20th century here, as well as the political undercurrents which can leave even the most well-meaning spooks high and dry.

The ostensible plot is about the then-popular drug war, with Ford’s noble if weary Ryan finding himself swept up in the politics of Colombian drug cartels. However, the film’s real villain in the U.S. president whom Ryan serves, a man who uses the U.S. intelligence and military as his personal hit squad to settle scores, and then leaves them stranded when it becomes politically convenient. In many ways this is a prescient film about the 21st century to come. Which is to say that Clear and Present Danger has just enough brains to make its explosions matter. And yes, there are ‘splosions.

Cold Mountain (2003)

September 1

A movie that it’s hard to imagine folks making today, Cold Mountain is a Civil War epic which eschews the usual trappings of dramas set during that era. The film’s main characters are North Carolinians who find themselves drawn into the Confederate cause of secession (and thereby slavery), although Jude Law’s Inman is no slaveholder. In fact, he has no real reason to be fighting the war, which is why after seeing years of carnage he goes AWOL, embarking on a Homeric quest to return to his Cold Mountain home and the sweetheart waiting there for him, Ada (Nicole Kidman).

Not that things are much better back in the poverty of Appalachia where Ada’s land has fallen on hard times. Living under the tyranny of the home guard, Ada and her own sorrows on the domestic front complement Inman’s, revealing the horrible futility of war from many perspectives. A bit overwrought in places (Cold Mountain was clearly designed to win Oscars), there is nevertheless an earthy authenticity about this yarn which is impossible to ignore.

Do the Right Thing (1989)

September 1

Spike Lee’s seminal masterpiece is as potent 32 years later as the day it was released. A funny, heartbreaking, infuriating, and ultimately thrilling experience, Do the Right Thing proves as elusively complex as its misleadingly optimistic title. It’s also just a blast to watch.

Read more

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BlacKkKlansman: Spike Lee Explores Racism in Classic Hollywood with New Movie

By David Crow

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Blade Runner: How Its Problems Made It a Better Movie

By Ryan Britt

An ensemble piece, Do the Right Thing primarily focuses on Lee as Mookie, a delivery man for his neighborhood’s pizza joint owned by Sal (Danny Aiello). The relationship between the white business man and the Black employee, and what that means for the predominantly Black Brooklyn neighborhood of Bedford–Stuyvesant, is explored from every angle as both men, plus Mookie’s whole community, endure the hottest day of the year. Tensions rise, prejudices are exposed, and an ending involving a young Black man and violent police officers, and a trash can and a window, remains as poignant as ever.

Green Lantern (2011)

September 1

Ah, Green Lantern. Remember when this movie was supposed to be the launching pad for the DC Cinematic Universe or whatever it ended up being called? Following the gritty realism of Christopher Nolan’s first two Batman movies, the loopy cosmic vibe of this would-be epic was just not what audiences were expecting to see. And even with all the visual pyrotechnics, an earnest try from a somewhat miscast Ryan Reynolds in the title role, and a great turn by Mark Strong as anti-hero Sinestro, the movie just came across as uninspired and unfocused.

Part of the problem may have been hiring Casino Royale director Martin Campbell—known for bringing Bond back to Earth—to helm what is essentially an uneasy mix of superhero origin story and space opera. Campbell does his best, as do actors like Reynolds, Strong, Tim Robbins, and Angela Bassett, but the script is too saddled with stuff. The primary villain is a cloud and the secondary villain—Peter Sarsgaard in a puffy head—is chewing the scenery in another movie entirely. We may get a good Green Lantern movie one day, but this one is best enjoyed while cleaning the house or getting drunk.

Mystery Men (1999)

September 1

Made in a time before superhero films became a Hollywood mainstay, Mystery Men is an artifact from a bygone era. The admittedly overstuffed superhero comedy made by “Got Milk?” commercial director Kinka Usher flopped at the box office, despite having an ensemble cast that included Ben Stiller, Hank Azaria, William H. Macy, Greg Kinnear, Janeane Garofalo, Paul Reubens, Lena Olin, Geoffrey Rush, Eddie Izzard, and Claire Forlani. Perhaps 1999 wasn’t ready for a superhero satire about a team of lesser superheroes who are asked to save the day?

Read more

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Green Lantern Star Mark Strong Was Excited for Sequel

By Don Kaye

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Blade Runner 2049 and the Role of Joi in a Joyless World

By David Crow

Likely, this concept would do much better today in a pop culture climate where superhero subversions like The Boys and Watchmen have thrived. Sadly, this wasn’t to be the fate for Mystery Men, which made only $33 million at the box office against a budget of $68 million. The cult classic may yet find its time to shine on the Netflix Top Ten and, if not, it will always be able to boast its connection to Smash Mouth’s “All Star” music video, which features characters from the film.

Once Upon a Time in America (1984)

September 1

The story behind the last film ever directed by the great Italian filmmaker Sergio Leone is as fascinating as the picture itself. Having made his reputation as the king of spaghetti Westerns—and then transcending the genre with films like The Good, the Bad and the Ugly and Once Upon a Time in the West—Leone set his sights on gangsters in 20th century America. But his nearly four-hour epic was severely truncated down to 139 minutes and rendered almost incomprehensible in America where it failed spectacularly. Meanwhile the original version remained largely unseen until it was restored in 2012.

Leone’s methodical and occasionally dreamlike esthetic might still be a tough sit for some audiences, but we hope that Netflix is indeed showing the full-length version (this is the company that backed The Irishman, for Chrissakes, which probably wouldn’t exist without Leone’s influence). It’s an expansive, truly gripping epic that stretches across a 50-year span, encompassing Prohibition, Italian, and Jewish criminal mobs, plus politics and more in a vast portrait of a corrupt American dream. It’s been called one of the greatest gangster films of all time, and rightly so.

School of Rock (2003)

September 1

Bless the movie gods above for a filmmaker like Richard Linklater. Typically an indie darling known for time-bending cinematic experiments such as the Before Sunrise trilogy and Boyhood, the Dazed and Confused filmmaker can still also do genuinely great mainstream entertainment when he wants to. Hence his partnering with the oft-underrated talent of Jack Black. Together, they made an all-time family classic between them in School of Rock.

Read more

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Mob Antipasta: Best Gangster Movie Food Scenes

By Tony Sokol

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Jaws: Why the USS Indianapolis Speech is Steven Spielberg’s Favorite Scene

By David Crow

The plot, if you somehow haven’t seen it, involves Black playing an out-of-work rocker who cons his way into becoming a prestigious private school’s new music teacher—one who’d rather teach his kids about the awesomeness of KISS or Led Zeppelin than Mozart and Beethoven. He even gets the kids to start a rock band! The supreme appeal of the movie, however, is the interest and affection Linklater showers onto Black as well as his entire cast of talented youngsters, who all get to shine and help build this Zoomer touchstone. That includes future iCarly star Miranda Cosgrove as Black’s pint-sized nemesis turned frenemy.

Jaws (1975)

September 16

Arguably the greatest summer blockbuster ever made, there is no debate over the fact that Jaws kickstarted this type of summer spectacle. Which makes returning to it now kind of remarkable when one realizes how grounded and real Steven Spielberg’s primal horror still feels. And we’re not talking about the killer shark; Great Whites do not behave this way, nor do they look like that rubber monstrosity fans affectionately refer to as “Bruce.”

Rather the film’s paradox of being a thriller intended for adults during New Hollywood’s golden age in the 1970s, as well as being the accidental creation of the summer blockbuster, means the film maintains a surprising degree of naturalism and complexity among its three central characters, and their various motives for getting in a boat to do primordial battle with a fish like something out of a Hemingway book. Plus, in addition to the terror of not seeing the shark for most of the movie and Spielberg instead relying on John Williams’ nerve-shattering score, the film’s depiction of politicians who will let their voters get eaten before listening to the scientists hits especially close to home these days.

Jaws 2 (1978)

September 16

The making of Jaws 2, which was inevitable following the unprecedented success of Steven Spielberg’s classic 1975 original, was beset with as many problems as the first film. The first, of course, was that Spielberg did not return to direct; that task fell to John D. Hancock (Let’s Scare Jessica to Death), who was replaced prior to filming by Jeannot Szwarc. The script was constantly revised as well, and star Roy Scheider was apparently unhappy that he was contractually obligated to show up.

In the end, Jaws 2 isn’t a bad film; it’s just a pointless one. The town of Amity is plagued, improbably enough, by a second shark, and once again the mayor (Murray Hamilton, somehow reelected after pulling a Ron DeSantis in the first movie) idiotically refuses to heed Chief Brody’s warnings. The film’s centerpiece is the shark’s relentless attack on a bunch of teens headed out to sea in a small flotilla of boats, and Szwarc generates some real tension and horror even if we see way more of the monster this time. There’s no way Jaws 2 can match the greatness of its predecessor, but considering what came afterward, we’ll take what we can get.

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[helshades]

The Brodinsons: Kings of Asgard

Extracted from here for reasons related to practicality.

Quotation 1

“I start in the film as Thor’s younger brother and I think in the manner of all younger brothers I have a greater sense of freedom. I’m not the oldest therefore the parental expectations aren’t as heavy, so it’s like a lot of younger children in sibling groups; I think Loki has a bit more freedom. He’s not going to be King. He knows that. And so he’s freer to… he has less responsibility on his shoulders so he’s freer to have a bit more fun. And I think like everybody at Marvel has been very clear and brilliant about coming into this that Loki just has… they’re both enormously gifted. Thor and Loki are a two-man team and they’re both going to run Asgard when Odin steps down, and Thor has an ability and a physicality and a presence—a physical presence that is… he’s the type of man you follow. You just do. In the same way they used to talk about all the leaders and the captains and the generals that came out of both World Wars that those captains and generals weren’t necessarily elected just in battles. There were certain men who were followed. You know, leaders were born and Thor is that guy. And Loki’s gifts are different in that he is sharper, he’s cleverer, he’s more interested in tactics and strategy. He’s capable of thinking ahead and he enjoys chaos. So he enjoys reacting to chaos and that affects how given that he’s the God of mischief. Mischief is essentially chaos. He likes stoking the fire of chaos and seeing what happens as a result.”

                 — Tom Hiddleston on Loki, 2011 interview by Collider during the production of the first Thor film.

Quotation 2

“Thor is the favoured son, and destined to be heir to the throne of Odin and that kind of rubs Loki the wrong way, but at the same time they’ve had a great experience growing up together. Odin has been a tough but good and fair father to both of them.”

                  — Kevin Feige, quoted in the Art of Thor official book.

Quotation 3

                        ODIN           Do you think he's ready?                         FRIGGA           He thinks he is. He has his          father's confidence.                         ODIN           He'll need his father's wisdom.                         FRIGGA           And his humility?           Odin reacts.          FRIGGA (CONT'D)           Thor won't be alone. Loki will be          at his side to give him counsel.          Have faith in your sons.  

                — Deleted scene from Thor, to be read in the original script.

“Thor and Loki are a two-man team and they’re both going to run Asgard when Odin steps down”

“Thor won’t be alone. Loki will be at his side to give him counsel.”

I don’t think it has been pointed out enough that Odin and Frigga had always intended to have both of their sons rule Asgard, and that Thor and Loki themselves have long been a rather efficient team. Here’s to hoping they’ll get the occasion to be one again. (Before one stabs the other and runs away with the silverware, of course.)

star-sought-light:

I agree with everything you say. I was also reminded of the scene where Frigga *gives* Loki the throne; clearly, she thought him capable of being king, even when Loki initially refused, and it does feel like a further piece of evidence that both were loved and both considered equally capable of rule. Although why Thor over Loki, when they admit Thor wasn't ready?

The last question was just a criticism of them, but I haven't enough characters to express that. It seemed to make sense with the original script that Odin meant for Loki to rule Jotunheim, but - without that scene - makes little sense, as they're picking the seeming less capable child to rule over the capable one.

Quotation 4

“It's been in the works for many years, right, since we finished Dark World. What has Loki been doing on that throne in guise of Odin? And we always liked the idea that he was doing a good job! He was doing a good, but shortsighted job. The trains were running on time, but he wasn't paying attention to anything else going on in the universe or in the realms.”

                — Kevin Feige, interviewed by CinemaBlend shortly before the release of Thor: Ragnarök.

We have often discussed between us the fact that Loki is much more like Odin than many, including himself, would like to think; something that Taika Waititi had Hela comment upon in Ragnarök, in fact: ‘You sound like him’. No matter their differences, Loki was very much Odin’s son. He inherited the sharp wit and calculating mind of both his adoptive parents, in reality, whereas Thor had his father’s hubris but his mother’s heart. On the other hand, Thor is clever, much cleverer than everyone usually give him credit for, while Loki is somewhat less of the strategical mastermind than too many people have decided he had to be... After all, Loki makes up a lot of it as he goes along, and he lacks self-perception to a ludicrous extent—he lacks wisdom, probably because he lacks the humility and empathy necessary for change, and wisdom requires the capacity for change, like Thor, on the contrary, demonstrated in learning from his mistakes.

I’m not entirely sure this was the entire reason for Odin and Frigga choosing Thor over Loki for occupying the throne of Asgard, though; I would say the main reason for this was, quite plainly, the reality of Loki’s birth first and foremost. Not that it make him unworthy, but it seems highly likely that his true parentage would have eventually caused some turmoil within the realm... This is not the only thing, either.

Thor isn’t only an Asgardian citizen nor even an Asgardian prince; he is of the line of Odin, the line of Borr and of Búri (the former appearing in the prologue of The Dark World, the latter cited in behind-the-scenes material as the king who had the oldest part of Asgard built) before them. He descends from the founders of Asgard, you see, and, like his father Odin and his older sister Hela, Thor derives most of his power from the very people of Asgard. There is much to speculate here, but it would be hard not to state right away that the kings of Asgard are almost one with their people, and that in order for Asgard to prosper, a king of the line of Búri must occupy the throne. Which is not to say that Loki or someone else couldn’t be king, only that he would probably lack in power and oversight somewhat.

Remember that Thor, prior to Ragnarök, had visions of Asgard’s impending doom, whereas Loki saw nothing—and when warned about them under Odin’s guise he dismissed them as ‘just a silly dream... signs of an overactive imagination’. The Odinforce was never cited in the Marvel Cinematic Universe but it is very tempting indeed to assume that Thor, has inherited more from his mighty father than a throne.

          FRIGGA (CONT'D)           Thor won't be alone. Loki will be          at his side to give him counsel.          Have faith in your sons.                         ODIN           Yes, but Thor's still a boy. He          could be a great King...           Odin stops, notices HIS HAND SHAKING. It seems to be out of          synch temporally with the rest of the world, leaving a trail          as it moves. He stares at it determinedly, concentrating,          trying to stop the strange event through the force of his          sheer will.          Finally, the occurrence subsides, his hand normal once more.          A worried Frigga covers his hand with her own.          ODIN (CONT'D)                         (QUIETLY)           ...if we only had more time.                         FRIGGA           For once, our son needs something          we cannot provide.                         ODIN           I can fight it a little longer...                         FRIGGA           No. You've put it off too long! I          worry for you.           He touches her cheek.                          ODIN           I've destroyed demons and monsters,          devastated whole worlds, laid waste          to mighty kingdoms, and still you          worry for me?                         FRIGGA           Always.  

                         LOKI           It all makes sense now. Why you          favored Thor all these years.                         ODIN           Listen...                         LOKI           Because no matter how much you          claim to "love" me, you could never          have a Frost Giant sitting on the          Throne of Asgard!           Odin's body begins to shake, he lifts his hand. It starts to          move out of synch temporarily, leaving a trail, the effect of          the Odinsleep approaching. Loki doesn't notice as Odin tries          to fight it off.                         ODIN           Listen to me!           Loki strides away towards the exit.          ODIN (CONT'D)           Loki!           Odin starts towards him, when the enormous mental, emotional,          and physical strain of recent events finally takes its toll.          The effect of the Odinsleep consumes him. His entire body          now moves out of sync with the rest of the world, leaving          trails behind him as he staggers backwards.          Odin falls back against a wall, his face contorting in a          scream. He collapses to the stone floor.          Loki, shocked, hurries to him. He takes Odin in his arms,          calls out.                         LOKI           Guards!  

Inattentive people have made fun of Odin’s ‘convenient Odinsleep’ for a long time, but the truth is, Odin had been putting off this indispensable regeneration of his physical faculties, which he underwent once a year, for too long prior to the events of Thor, precisely because he sensed grave developments in the near future and wanted to be able to control whatever Thor wouldn’t know how. Of course, we know that Odin had been doing all he could to push back the inexorable advent of Ragnarök... and it seems more and more likely that he might have cheated death for quite a long time, in all likelihood using the Odinsleep, in the knowledge that as long as he kept alive, Hela’s reign of terror would be kept at bay. At the very least, he would be affording time for his sons to grow up, and especially for Thor to grow strong enough to, maybe, with hope, go against his sister one day.

          61 INT. ODIN'S CHAMBERS - DAY 61          Frigga sits at her husband's bedside, holding his hand. Odin          lies there—looking pale and lifeless, his body and the          space around it warped from the effect of the Odinsleep. The          walls of the chamber have moved close around him, protecting          him like a dark crypt, sealing off any daylight.          Loki sits at Odin's side, across from Frigga. She speaks          softly to him.                         FRIGGA           I asked him to be honest with you          from the beginning. There should          be no secrets in a family.                         LOKI           So why did he lie?                         FRIGGA           He kept the truth from you so that          you would never feel different.          You are in every way our son, Loki,          and we your family. You must know          that.           Loki takes this in, stares at Odin.          FRIGGA (CONT'D)                         (RE: ODIN)           You can speak to him. He can see          and hear us, even now.                         LOKI           How long will it last?                         FRIGGA           I don't know. This time is          different. We were unprepared.                         LOKI           I never get used to seeing him like          this. The most powerful being in          the Nine Realms lying helpless          until his body is restored.                         FRIGGA           But he's put it off for so long          now, I fear...

Once again, I’m also left wondering whether Loki wasn’t actually the son of the same mother who gave birth to Hela—we could call her Fárbauti, since there was one in the comics and since, like in the comics, the mythological mother of Loki, Laufey, was turned into a male in Marvel lore; or Angrboða, the mother of Hel in the myths. Note that if this were true, it would give Odin an acutely realistic reason for hiding the truth of his birth from Loki, in spite of his wife’s preference for telling him from the beginning. If Asgard’s bloodier past must be obfuscated, and Hela’s very existence forgotten by all, any mention of Loki’s dangerous lineage would have required similar secrecy.

It may also be, in the same vein, that Odin was well aware of Loki’s instability, be it linked to his true parentage or not, and wished him away from absolute power. Indeed, Thor himself wasn’t that much readier for kingship, but he was a hot head more than anything, whereas Loki’s ‘mischief’ evidently always had crueller undertones. Where power is concerned, he thoroughly needed his mother’s talents for appeasement. Probably, a lot like Odin did.

(Stripped of everything, Thor is a good man. Loki is not.)

[fussingoverfassbender]

An old interview from 2011 about Jane Eyre

BY EDWARD DOUGLAS ON MARCH 4, 2011

Actor Michael Fassbender may have first found his way onto filmgoers’ radars as Lt. Archie Hicox in Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds (or Zack Snyder’s 300if you were paying attention), but before then, he had already established himself as one of the stronger dramatic actors of the decade with his unforgettable performance in Steve McQueen’s Hunger. He’s kept fairly busy since then with similarly stirring performances in Andrea Arnold’s Fish Tankand a few movies that slipped under most radars… and at least one that probably should have (Jonah Hex). Regardless, he’s poised to become a household name with his upcoming appearance as Magneto in X-Men: First Class and with his casting in Ridley Scott’s return to science fiction with Prometheus.

In Cary (Sin Nombre) Fukunaga’s take on Charlotte Brontë’s Jane Eyre, Fassbender gets to play the iconic literary role of Edward Rochester, a character previously played by the likes of Orson Welles, Charlton Heston, William Hurt and Timothy Dalton. This Jane Eyre is played by Mia Wasikowska, her second iconic literary character after starring in Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, and for those who haven’t read the book, the movie follows the life of that title character, an impoverished young woman trying to find herself a life without love who ultimately becomes the governess for the troubled Rochester, who falls in love with her. Fukunaga has taken a far more realism-based approach to the material which has been adapted many times previously, this time with a cast that includes Jamie Bell, Dame Judi Dench and Sally Hawkins.

Having spoken with Fassbender just last year, we already had a fairly comfortable rapport when we sat down with him a few weeks back, making it much easier to get right into a fairly freeform chat about the movie as well as other things he has going on.

ComingSoon.net: Obviously, “Jane Eyre” is a classic piece of fiction so when somebody sent you the script, you must have known at least the title. Did you have any sort of connection to the book at all? Michael Fassbender: Yeah, I had read the book I think six years ago or so, because I was involved in perhaps doing this thing called “Wide Sargasso Sea,” which is the idea of what would have happened in Jamaica before the Brontë novel. It wasn’t Brontë who wrote it, but (Jean Rhys’) take of what would happen in Jamaica and Rochester as a young man and what happened with Bertha the wife and all that. I read that and I read “Jane Eyre” at the time, and obviously I read it again once they offered me Rochester this time around. My sister and my mother were big fans when I was a child and when I was in my teens as well, they were always talking about it because my sister was reading it. That was the reason why I wanted to do it, so they could take a look.

CS: They must be thrilled. Have they seen it yet? Fassbender: They haven’t, no, I haven’t seen it yet! I’m waiting for the premiere to have the nerves and just to experience it for the first time with an audience.

CS: I don’t want to embarrass you but everyone I’ve talked to–men, women, gay, straight–they all have the hots for you after seeing this movie. Fassbender: Oh, really?! (laughs)

CS: Even though you already were a sex symbol, I think this movie is going to put you over the top. Fassbender: Oh, fantastic! (laughs)

CS: Rochester is almost as an iconic character as Jane Eyre herself, especially to the women who read the book who must have great expectations of what Rochester would be like. Fassbender: Yeah, that’s the thing, and I did watch all the previous versions as well, a lot of them I could get my hands on.

CS: Wasn’t Orson Welles one of them? Fassbender: Yeah, I watched that and at one point, I was supposed to be doing “Wuthering Heights,” about three years ago I think it was now, so I watched Laurence Olivier do his “Wuthering Heights,” and I was like, “Woah, it’s so overdramatic,” and the same with Orson Welles, it’s like (doing his impression of Welles) “Jaaane… Jaaaaaaaane…!” I think Toby Stephens was my favorite – he did it for ITV, one of the British channels, it was a six-parter for television. Then I threw it all away and then I sort of concentrated on what was in the book and what was in the script. By treating him as the Byronic hero, which Brontë wrote him like, that gave me all I needed and then I thought, “Okay, he seems a bit bipolar as well.” His moods sort of swing and it’s because of all the sh*t that’s going on in his head and the fact that (SPOILERS!!!!!) he’s got this woman locked upstairs in the attic that’s always with him in a way that’s almost like he’s carrying a weight with him as well.

CS: It must be tough, because he’s supposed to be the perfect romantic lead but he does have all these secrets and flaws, which slowly start to come out as Jane gets to know him. Fassbender: Definitely flawed, yeah, and at the beginning, and you think, “God, this guy is an ***hole.” He’s sort of manipulative and cruel and charming and you realize that he’s just been putting up all these fronts and layers and protections. I mean, as a young man, this sh*t happened to him, and he started off his life I always imagined bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to have a go at life and then BANG! He gets knocked on his *** and so, because of that, he doesn’t trust people, he doesn’t trust relationships. He’s been burned. So when Jane comes into the house, she just starts peeling away one layer after the other and in the end, she sort of heals him.

CS: When I talked to Mia and Cary a couple of days ago, they were saying they both had books with copious notes in them and had been referring back to the book and having all these meetings to discuss it. Did you have to go back to the book a lot yourself for reference? Fassbender: Yeah, I don’t really take a lot of notes. I’ve noticed that my scripts are usually quite empty of notes to be honest. I’ve scribbled down a few things, but I read the script over and over again a couple hundred times, it must have been. That’s the only way I kind of prepare, I just sort of read it and read it and read it, till you’re absolutely sick of it, and then you read it again. Then when I’m on set, it’s sort of in my skin, so I can then go anywhere I want with it and feel free to allow things to happen, as opposed to making sure I’m hitting all the points.

CS: The words from the novel especially for your character are great, some of the lines he says you kind of want to keep them in your head to use as pick-up lines. Fassbender: “Right, that would be a good one! That’s a first date line!” (laughs)

CS: Exactly, but you can only use those lines as long as the woman hasn’t read “Jane Eyre” and know where you stole them from. But was it Cary who wanted to make sure that some of Rochester’s best lines from the book remained in the film? Fassbender: Yes, I mean I didn’t change the script. It was so well written and it’s finding those little moments in the book. You’ve got a book and how do you condense it into a script and that’s the really fine art there, so everything that’s in there, every sentence, is there for a reason, because it’s been filtered down to what is absolutely necessary to have. That’s why I was saying that there was a precision that I wanted to find with him, so that I’m not just brush-stroking over stuff, that it’s more finite and sort of detailed.

CS: Were you able to use anything from the other script you had read that involved the character? Fassbender: “Wide Sargasso Sea”? That’s one way of going about it, and I tended to not go that way. The whole idea… I mean, I did often think, “Oh, God, poor Bertha. She might have just been a horny lady. She might have just enjoyed sex and back then, it’s like ‘Whoa, you’re enjoying this sh*t, you must have the devil in you or you must be crazy.'” So there is that take on it, but I kind of went along the lines that she was insane and it was a hereditary thing, her mother before her had mental problems, so that’s kind of the line I took.

CS: Let’s talk about Mia. I met her for the first time a couple of days ago, and she’s really quite amazing in terms of being 18 and really having it together. Can you talk about what makes her such a perfect Jane Eyre, and why she embodies that character? Fassbender: Yeah, it’s just because she’s such a gifted actress, really is. Once I found out she was playing Jane Eyre, and I got “In Treatment” and I watched her episodes on that.

CS: I assume this was before “Alice” and “The Kids Are All Right”? Fassbender: Yes, I haven’t seen “Alice” yet actually, but I was like “Oh My God, she’s got so much maturity.” There was this 17-year-old, or 16 as she was then, and I was like, “Wow, who is this girl?” Her choices are so interesting and she’s got a real connection with the camera. You’ve seen her as Mia and also the fact that she comes from this dance background. She’s got this great physical authority and command of her physicality that is brilliant and also a discipline that she’s brought from that dance world into the acting world. I just sort of had to try and keep up with her. She’s I think the future, she’s like Meryl Streep class.

CS: You’re also working with Carey Mulligan who is another one of those impressive young actresses. Fassbender: I know. That’s the thing. Once you’re put amongst a high caliber of talent, it raises you.

CS: Oh, and of course, the girl from “Fish Tank.” Fassbender: Yeah, Katie (Jarvis), wow, what an explosion she is. She’s not an actress, she’s just Katie. I’ll be interested to see what she does next or if she wants to act at all, I don’t know.

CS: Have you seen any of the Cronenberg film you did yet? Fassbender: I haven’t seen it. I don’t really see the films until there’s an audience. What do you say about David Cronenberg? Other than as a man, obviously his talent is clear for everyone to see. He’s a real master and a real technician, as well as being an artist, but he’s just such a nice guy and such a light personality and very warm, and funny. We had a good sense of humor on set, and then Viggo is obviously a big hero of mine, and Keira is going to make a lot of people sit up and what she does in this film is going to be really impressive.

CS: How’s it been going working with Steve McQueen again on “Shame”? Is this a little more conventional since you’re shooting in New York? Fassbender: (shakes head) No, it’s all the things you expect from Steve. It’s intense. There’s nothing left on the floor at the end of scenes. Everything goes into the camera. We improvise, we take risks, and it’s exciting and Sean Bobbit behind the camera again, it’s sort of dancing all together. We often say that, Steve and I, it’s like musicians and when the timing’s right, you can feel it, and when the timing’s off, you can also feel it. I’m back to working with him tomorrow so I’m trying to make sure I’m well prepared really.

CS: So is he doing a lot of location stuff here in New York? Fassbender: Yup, all location.

CS: How has he been adjusting to shooting here versus Ireland? Fassbender: Well, I think he went to film school or art school here, so he’s familiar with New York and always had the idea of setting this story in New York, so he’s been in and out of New York for the last couple years. When he first mentioned this idea to me in 2008, he’s been coming back and forth since then.

CS: It’s great that he’s shooting in New York. We really appreciate when filmmakers bring their films here. Fassbender: There was a time when there was loads and then there was a time when there wasn’t any, and now it’s sort of coming back again, which is great, because it’s such a fantastic setting to make films.

CS: Can you tell me anything more about the movie? Fassbender: I can’t really.

CS: I know that you have a history of sex. Fassbender: Yes…

CS: And that Carey Mulligan plays your sister. Fassbender: Yes…

CS: Is there anything else you can say about it? Fassbender: No! (laughs) But it’s a beautiful script and I have to say that it’s a very relevant topic and we’ll see, we’ll see.

You can also read what Fassbender said about taking on the role of Magneto, the Master of Magnetism in Matthew Vaughn’s X-Men: First Class over on SuperHeroHype.

Jane Eyre opens in select cities on March 11. Look for our video interview with director Cary Fukunaga very soon.

[encyclopedia-dramatica]

ED Interviews: The Ben Garrison  (  @GrrrGraphics ) Interview

crackrabbit ( for ED) : First off, you probably get asked this a lot, but can you tell us about how you started drawing and painting? Ben Garrison: I started writing stories when I was in the 5th grade. Then I began illustrating them with little cartoons. I enjoyed drawing stuff for classmates--caricatures and such. I would draw caricatures of my teachers. One time I drew one of a rather brusque math teacher in the 9th grade. He snuck up on me and grabbed the drawing. I thought I was in big trouble, but he loved it and put it up on the bulletin board. By the time I was in high school I started painting. That's when I knew what I wanted to be in life--a fine artist. I studied painting in college, although I have a BA and not a BFA. My wife Tina has a BFA and she was a better cartoonist than me when I met her. I've gotten better since. After I graduated, I got a job at a newspaper and I became a graphic artist instead. I still draw complex information graphics for corporate clients. Political cartooning was a just a sideline when i started drawing them in 2009. I did not expect any fame or money. In fact, they cost me a lot in terms of a smeared reputation and a resulting loss of commercial work.
 crackrabbit ( for ED) : Do you ever listen to music in the background while creating your art? If so (and even if not) what kind of music do you enjoy?

Ben Garrison: Yes. I listen to classical music 90 percent of the time. Some of my darker and more complex cartoons were drawn while listening to Shostakovich symphonies in particular. I like everything he has written, but his Fourth through Eleventh ones in particular--each one is a masterpiece. To me it's a shame that young people aren't listening to the greatest music ever written. Instead they subject their ear drums to heavy metal, rap, hip hop and other trash. I encourage them to listen to classical music because it will connect them to the sublime. I also like early jazz music, old Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra tunes as well as some old standards from that bygone era. If any of your readers want to start with an easy to understand classical music introductory piece, I suggest Mozart's Symphony No. 39. It never fails to put me in a good mood.

crackrabbit ( for ED) : A lot of people on the so-called altright (which includes the new right , or alt-lite as some call it) like to spend free time reading political/philosophy books. Do you ever have time to read books, with all the work you do; and if so, what kind of books do you like and/or recommend?

Ben Garrison: I consider myself to be a libertarian cartoonist and not part of the 'alt right.' I don't have time to read all the books I want to read. I like reading books on history a lot. I minored in history when I was in college. Victor Davis Hanson is one of my favorite history writers. Most recently I finished a book titled "The Problem With Socialism" by Thomas DiLorenzo. I highly recommend it to everyone. I just started a book about my favorite president, "Andrew Jackson," written by H.W. Brands. I don't read a lot of fiction, but a friend gave me "All the Light We Cannot See," by Anthony Doerr and that was pretty good.

crackrabbit ( for ED) : You’ve appeared on INFOWARS/Alex Jones Show a bit over the last two years. How did that come about?

Ben Garrison: I listened to Alex a lot when I first began drawing the cartoons and many of my ideas were inspired directly from some of the things he said. He speaks very colorfully and uses a lot of metaphors that conjure up vivid imagery. I was very angry at him when his divorce was announced and I found out he was a multi-millionaire. I definitely heard him say that he wasn't a millionaire and that most of the money went back into his operations. I was angry that he was hanging out with that scum bag Charlie Sheen for a while, too. Mostly, lot of my anger sprang from regret, because for a while he had guests on such as Max Kaiser and many others who were predicting $500 per ounce silver. It was during this time that I drew a lot of pro-silver cartoons.

I went 'all in' on silver including getting leveraged with silver futures and I got wiped out in 2011 when JP Morgan illegally colluded to short massive amounts of the metal. I should have invested in Bitcoin instead. Now silver is in a protracted bear market, but in retrospect it wasn't Alex's fault and I forgave him. He does deserve to be a millionaire for his years of hard work and waking people up. My financial destruction couldn't have come at a worst time though, because the trolling was at its worst when I was struggling the most. It was hard to find commercial work when search engines summoned up horrific defamation.

Anyway, with the help of my wife Tina we began righting the ship in 2015 and the presidential election in 2016 helped us turn things around. Now I'm close to being able to make a living from cartooning alone. The trolls no longer concern me, although I still despise Andrew Anglin. His troll army helped get me kicked out of the art gallery I was in because they harassed the owner. I'm glad to see someone with the means is going after him for libel and harassment, even though I was disappointed to see the guys at WeSearchr lending him a hand financially. He certainly doesn't deserve it.

I've been on the Alex Jones three times now. It's fast-paced and I have no idea in advance what I'll be asked, so I have to think fast on my feet. I don't claim to have any special talent for public speaking. Mostly I'm content to let him talk. He's a professional and an entertainer. I think he does believe in what he's doing and he's helped us a lot. I've been on many other radio shows and podcasts and those platforms have allowed me more time to sort out my thoughts, but even still I'm mostly a ranter. I never use a script.

crackrabbit ( for ED) : In the image (that i have saved) of your iconic “March of Tyranny” cartoon, there are pencils visible. Do you usually pencil then ink your cartoons, or what is the production process? Ben Garrison:Yeah, I pencil my cartoons in on a large piece of quality 3-ply illustration paper and then ink them in by hand. "The March of Tyranny" was drawn in about three hours with a 'Sharpie' pen and it was drawn rather small. I don't draw them like that any more, but back then I didn't think I'd get many viewers, so I didn't spend a lot of time crafting them. A lot of my earlier cartoons were dashed out quickly.

crackrabbit ( for ED) : Tell me about your fine art paintings.. What paint mediums do you work in most? And what painters are influences on you?

Ben Garrison: In a perfect world I wouldn't be cartooning at all--I'd be working on paintings. I enjoy that the most. I use oil on canvas and a local carpenter here frames them for me--he uses 100 year-old barn wood which gives the paintings a unique western flair. I like Picasso even though he was a monster in his personal life. I also admire the work of DeKooning a great deal. He was a genius. Yes, I know a lot of people consider modern art to be 'degenerate' but they're wrong. I think what they object to is 'conceptual art,' which consists of existential, post-modern exhibition type stuff and I agree it's boring and bad. crackrabbit ( for ED) : What are your thoughts about how the libertarian movement has changed over the past 2-3 decades? Ben Garrison: Libertarians were dealt a setback with the tongue poking Gary Johnson. He hurt the movement. Johnson is a liberal who wants pot legalized. That's it. He apparently smoked too many harvests because he couldn't even name one world leader he admired, even though as governor of New Mexico he must have worked with Mexican leaders such as Vicente Fox. Regardless, I'm a Libertarian because it's the best means to push back against an ever-growing leviathan government. Sure, it may be a waste of time but as Rhett Butler said, "Maybe it's because I've always had a weakness for lost causes." crackrabbit ( for ED) : Where did ya learn to put so much detail into every section of your cartoon pieces?

Ben Garrison: I've always put a lot of detail in my work and when I started out my cartoons were over-worked and chalk full of obsessive detail. I've actually simplified things now. Some people hate what I do, but many more like looking for the little hidden Easter eggs in the detail. The last cartoon I drew featured a small cockroach on Hillary's hamburger of corruption. Nobody saw it. I'm an old man now and my style is pretty much fixed. I will still try to get better, but some want me to draw in an animé style and so forth. I don't think so! Someone wrote me and said I had a lot of work to do...he said my inking was bad, my color theory was terrible and I'd never be a 'professional.' Well, I've made my living via art for nearly 40 years now. I'm thinking that makes me a professional. I've also sold a good number of my latest cartoon collection book. Still, harsh criticism comes with the territory. Some people think my cartoons are the best ever and some think they're the worst ever. As long as I'm getting their attention and drawing memorable things, then I'll consider them to be successful.

Encyclopedia Dramatica would liek 2 thank Ben for the opportunity to interview him.

Ben’s work can be found, viewed and even purchased at grrrgraphics.com . If you want to buy his designs on shirts you can go to https://teespring.com/stores/grrrgraphics-t-shirts . Finally, feel free to help support Ben on Patreon at https://www.patreon.com/grrrgraphics .

[jisforjudi]

it’s only a partial screenshot - but it’s a gorgeous photo.  if you can lay your hands on the culture section of today’s times you’ll see the whole picture in all her glory.

Judi Dench on playing Victoria again

The diamond dame is celebrating 60 years in the acting biz with a second pop at playing the queen on film. This time with a rather beautiful young man — ‘Who wouldn’t?’ By Louis Wise

It was on September 9, 1957 that Judi Dench made her debut as Ophelia in the Old Vic’s Hamlet. Over the six decades since, she has taken hundreds more roles, won dozens of awards and ­plaudits, and become embedded in the national psyche. What is the greatest misconception about her? A pause. “‘National treasure,’” she purrs, in that distinctive Denchian croak. “F****** ‘national treasure’!”

 We are sitting in the library of the Covent Garden Hotel, in London, where she is doing promotional duties for her latest effort, Victoria and Abdul. At 82, she looks gorgeous, if a little shaky: the rattle of the bangles on her arms is complemented by a persistent cough, accompanied by streaming eyes. (She dismisses the suggestion that it’s hay fever, but isn’t sure what it is instead.) She is dressed in the expected boho-Denchy pale linen and has tiny feet, her toenails painted scarlet. Will she celebrate her 60 years in the biz? “Oh, I doubt it, no.” A small pause. “I might have an extra glass of champagne that day.”

Dench is, as you’d probably expect, both warm and brisk from the off, but the first time she gets properly animated is when I mention the “n******* t*******” tag. We know she hates it, she says it all the time, but I only bring it up to ask whether it’s an albatross when she’s looking for roles. As soon as the phrase even looms, though: “Oh, please don’t say that! Everyone says it, everyone. It’s horrible, it’s awful. I hate it.” So, yes, it’s the biggest misconception about her. She later qualifies her answer. “I’d like much more to be the Notes on a Scandal woman than the Marigold Hotel woman, do you know what I mean?”

It’s bizarre to define Dench’s career in terms of two roles, considering this is a woman who has been Cleopatra, Elizabeth I, Lady Macbeth, M from the Bond films and, yes, Queen Victoria, but you can see what she’s getting at. In 2007’s Notes on a Scandal, Dench was exceptional as the tortured, torturing Barbara Covett, unhealthily obsessed with her younger colleague (played by Cate Blanchett); in 2011’s The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, she had a far more fragrant, floaty time in the silver-surfers drama set in India. It’s the former that she hungers for, even now. “Oh, I loved it! I loved every second. That’s the part I’m always looking for.”

Furious old lesbian roles not being more forthcoming, though, she is back to playing the queen-empress for a second time, after Mrs Brown. Would she have liked to play any other crowned heads? “No, I don’t particularly want to play queens. You don’t actually think of Cleopatra [‘Cleoparrtra’] as a queen. You just think of her as somebody who behaves rather badly, now and again. But — if there’s a queen that behaves really badly...” She mulls it over. “You know, I long to find this film where this woman walks a tightrope and turns into a dragon. If that part is around, and she happens to be a queen, that’s fine, too.”

Sadly, perhaps, Victoria and Abdul does not require this of her. It’s another anniversary of sorts, since Mrs Brown dates from 1997, and it was this that launched her surprising, late-blooming Hollywood career. (It was a TV movie for the BBC until Harvey Weinstein snapped it up and put it in cinemas, earning Dench the first of seven Oscar nominations in the process.) “Is it 20 years since I did Mrs Brown?” she asks. Yes, isn’t it odd? It seems only about 12 years to me. “It seems like 40 to me.”

The role is not the only similarity. Like Mrs Brown, Victoria and Abdul charts the unusual relationship the monarch had with a man in her long years of widowhood. Whereas the first film concentrated on her intimacy with John Brown, roughly covering the 1860s to the 1880s, the second starts up in the late 1880s, when Victoria, even older, even grumpier and even more alone, is suddenly taken with a young Indian servant, Abdul Karim (played by the Bollywood cutie Ali Fazal), who has been brought over from Agra. Victoria makes him join her private household and he becomes a favourite, educating her on the country of which she is empress; she designates him her “Munshi”, an Urdu word for “teacher”.

All lovely, but of course this goes down like a lead balloon with the monarch’s stiff inner circle, for reasons of class and colour, and things get tricky and sour. The film, directed by Stephen Frears and scripted by Lee Hall, is a game of two halves: naughtily funny to start, achingly sad at the close, as Victoria reaches the end of her life and their friendship reaches its limits. Dench says she had “no intention” of ever returning to Victoria, but that the script won her over.

“I thought it just gave another huge insight into her life. The whole episode with John Brown was strange, but I thought it was totally understandable, which I believe that this relationship was, too. [Here was] somebody that she found, and she could just talk to him, and he talk to her, and she could ask questions and learn something.”

How much of Victoria’s rapport with Karim is an echo of the John Brown episode? “I think the need is the echo,” she replies. After Prince Albert’s sudden death, Victoria was left alone, without a man she could be utterly devoted to. “Yes, she liked a chap around,” Dench nods — which, with the lusty Victoria, is an understatement.

No hint of sex here, but certainly romance: a man “with whom she could actually relax, all formal protocol cancelled. A real, proper relationship, being able to speak her mind to somebody — I think that’s what it was. Apart from the fact that he was an extremely beautiful young man. Who wouldn’t?” She smiles gleefully. “If Ali [Fazal] walked in now, you wouldn’t recognise me. I’d be a spring chicken, all over the place. So beautiful.”

As she says, she is not quite a spring chicken today, but she fires on nearly all cylinders. The main thing that strikes me is how funny she is, specifically her timing and delivery; she can make all sorts of lines work. It reminds me that my first experience of Dench wasn’t as the great Hollywood matriarch, but on a much cosier and smaller scale, in the BBC sitcom As Time Goes By.

Time has indeed gone by, though she doesn’t want to moan about it. There are, of course, her eyes: for years now, her eyesight has steadily gone, as she suffers from macular degeneration. It’s always bad, but it’s getting worse. She says she’s finally going to tackle audiobooks, as she can’t read novels any more. I am politely surprised — I would have thought she had fathomed that a long time ago. “Yes, but you know, you think you can struggle on. But last week we ran over the only pair of glasses of mine that remotely worked.”

Television, though, she still tries at. “We’ve been watching Poldark, which for me is Pol-very-very-dark. I keep going, ‘Who is that speaking?’ I remember Robin Ellis doing the original all those years ago. You don’t remember,” she says, appraising me. “You were in short trousers then.” I wasn’t even born, I’m afraid. “You weren’t born? Oh, thanks so much. Thank you so much.”

If she can laugh about it, there are sadder sides, too. Recently her eldest brother, to whom she was close, died. She was close to her whole family, with whom she had a “glorious” time. “I’ve thought a lot about it recently. I keep wanting to refer back, and there’s no one to do that with. It is hard when that happens.”

In many ways, though, she seems to have been very lucky: she had a blissfully happy 30-year marriage to the actor Michael Williams, who died in 2001, and with whom she had a daughter, Finty, who has provided her with a grandson, Sammy. I ask Dench when she was happiest in her life.

“Oh, I don’t know. I have a happy nature. I have been very, very unhappy, like everybody, but usually I have quite a sunny nature, which is something you don’t manufacture. It’s either something you’re born with, or you’re not. And I think that comes from my parents. They had great, great senses of humour.” Her childhood in Yorkshire sounds glorious: play-acting and cycling and going to the theatre (her parents were involved in am-dram), and when she went to boarding school nearby, that was “heaven”, too. So you didn’t even have a tricky adolescence?

“Well, I remember my mother saying to me when I was at art school, ‘You are without doubt the most intolerant person I’ve ever met.’ I think I found fault with everything. And I remember not being able to say anything back, and just looking out of the window. She said it to my back.” A pause. “It’s very good to be told that early.” Did you take it on board? “I hope so. Because I think I am quite tolerant now. To a certain extent.”

What can’t you tolerate? “I can’t tolerate the bastardisation of the English language,” she says with a cackle. “I’m always screaming at Sammy. He says, ‘I was laying there.’ And I say, ‘Hens lay — lying, lying!’” She also says that she doesn’t like it when an actor turns up to rehearsals unprepared: “It’s not up to you to take up another person’s time.” This is easy to visualise. She says often how much she loves working in an ensemble, but you can be sure that once she’s in one, the dame is very much a dame.

I ask who, of all the people she has met, she’d like to talk to again. “Oh, Gielgud. So funny! Terribly funny and irrelevant — I mean irreverent! Oh, he would send me up for that.” Also, she would like to meet Shakespeare, “to see if he had any more plays up his sleeve, or doublet”.

Lots of interviews dwell on Dench’s grief after losing Williams (and her new relationship with David Mills, whom she met at the opening of his squirrel sanctuary). But I was interested in how she and Williams met, and how it felt at the time. She met him in a pub on Drury Lane, in the early 1960s. Did she find him attractive at first?

“No, we just laughed a lot. And we went on meeting like that occasionally, and having a good laugh.” Things came to a head when he joined her on a theatrical tour in Australia, and he took it upon himself to propose; they finally wed in 1971. Had it been her ambition to be married? In the early 1970s, I’d assume mid-thirties was late for such a thing, especially for a woman wanting children.

“Oh, I wanted to be married and have six children! That’s a big regret in my life. But at least I have one divine girl, and a grandson.” But was she panicked at all about whether she’d settle down? You see, Judi, I’m 34 and single. “No, 34 is fine,” she says firmly. “It’s fine.” Yes, yes, but did you feel that way at the time?

“Oh, I know, but I was in love so, so much, all the time,” she replies dreamily. Before Michael? “Oh yeah. Mmm.” With varying levels of success? “Oh, hopeless.” Unrequited? “No!” She gives a cough, which for once might be a planned one. “No. Requited! It was just the most glorious time, a wonderful, wonderful time,” she says. “So don’t give up because you’re 34. Certainly don’t.”

The Munshi’s tale

Victoria and Abdul’s story began in 1887, her golden jubilee year. As part of the celebrations, she was presented with two Indian servants from Agra. Victoria took a shine to the more handsome of the two and integrated him into her household. For Abdul Karim, a humble clerk, this was a vertiginous elevation, though he balked at the menial work she demanded and asked to be sent home. The queen, 68, besotted with the 24-year-old, refused.

Very soon, she promoted him from simple manservant to “Munshi”, or teacher, asking him to give her lessons in Hindustani. The fruits of these labours are her Hindustani Journals, all 13 volumes of which are at Windsor Castle. They are a symbol of the empress-queen’s fervour for all things Indian, as encouraged by Karim — not least a good curry. Chicken and dal were her favourites.

Victoria’s family and entourage detested Karim. They railed and plotted against him, even threatening a mass walkout in 1897, but Victoria stood firm. When she died, however, retribution was swift. The new Edward VII ordered that all trace of Karim be removed; the king’s sister Beatrice excised all signs of him from her mother’s diary. Karim was sent back to India, where he would die eight years later in 1909, aged 46. Luckily, though, he left a diary with his relatives — a huge help to the journalist Shrabani Basu when she started researching his extraordinary story a few years ago. It’s on her book that Stephen Frears’s film is based.

A small trace of Karim survives at Victoria’s private retreat on the Isle of Wight, Osborne House. Two photographs hang in her dressing room, one on top of the other: one is of John Brown, the Scotsman who guided her through the darkest years of her widowhood; the other of her dear Munshi, who consoled her thereafter.

[playeroneplayertwo]

Back in Time (Tragedy Looper)

The only thing better than getting killed by a mad cultist embroiled in a suicide pact is going back in time and doing it again! And again!

And again!

Tragedy Looper (2011) Designed by BakaFire Art by Bascu, Rei Konno Published by Z-Man Games

I was hoping to frame this entire review around Back to the Future, a movie I prefer endlessly to the more plumb comparison for this game, Groundhog Day, but, to be fair, Groundhog Day is infinitely more apropos.

Tragedy Looper is an asymmetrical game about trying to stop a tragedy from happening. Sounds simple enough, no? The Groundhog Day bit comes from the fact that Tragedy Looper is a hidden information game, and the only way for the tragedy-averse player(s) to win the game is to have the tragedy happen (at least a few times), so as to learn exactly what’s going on. Each time the secret tragedy happens, the game resets as time is wound back to the beginning once more and the scenario restarts.

See? Groundhog Day.

Lowdown (How to Play–in a Very Small Nutshell)

I hope that no one reading this blog ever uses these Lowdowns as a means to learn the rules. I intentionally skip details (sometimes smaller rules, sometimes not) because the Lowdown is supposed to be an in-a-nutshell overview. I don’t want to get too detailed, because that could easily take up the whole review. That being said, I’m going to make this Lowdown even more macro than normal. If I make a dumb mistake or gloss over something that seems particularly important, I probably did so for the sake of brevity–at least that’s my excuse for now…

Tragedy Looper comes in a small box and has a surprisingly low number of components, but it’s a big game. Your first play of this is going to be tough, and its asymmetric nature will make it even harder to play, because if you want the experience to be even halfway satisfying, it’s not possible to play open-handed. All right, that’s enough of a prelude.

There are two sides to a game of Tragedy Looper: one Mastermind and one to three Protagonists. The Mastermind player will be doing the bulk of the work in running the game (not dissimilar to the Overlord in Descent (2012) or the Keeper in Mansions of Madness (2011)). Prior to starting the game, the Mastermind will get two cards outlining a main plot and subplot of the script, essentially the core of how the game works. These are only known to the Mastermind. A plot and subplot will dictate which character roles are present in the game–a cultist, conspiracy theorist, key person, serial killer, etc. Additionally, script cards will tell you about specific incidents, like a suicide or murder, that will happen on specific days of the script.

On a player’s turn, cards will be played by the Mastermind and Protagonists to alter the board. Character cards can be moved, movements can be canceled, intrigue or paranoia can be seeded across the board, as well as removed. The point of the game for the Mastermind is to end a loop by meeting specific conditions outlined by the plot of the script. For the Protagonists, on the other hand, the point is to learn what exactly is causing the loop (or round of the game) to end and prevent it.

I’ll give you an example. Let’s say that you are playing a scenario in which the loop will end when the key person (a roll that is hidden and known only to the Mastermind) is murdered. Simple enough. The Mastermind is given the ability to orchestrate this by a number of means. For example, if there is a serial killer character, the Mastermind can simply get the key person alone in a location with the serial killer. If a day in the game ends with this condition met, the Mastermind simply tells the Protagonists that the loop has ended because the tragedy has occurred. No other details are given. The game is reset at day one, and play resumes.

The real game here is that which plots are being used is completely hidden from the Protagonists, so often they will not even be aware if a game contains a key person role or not–as not all plots contain the same roles. Further, if a loop is ended and the cause if obvious, then it will be very easy for the Protagonists to prevent it the next time through. The meat of the game comes from the Mastermind muddying the water enough so as to create multiple possible end game conditions. Did the loop end because the teacher was murdered? Maybe they are the key person? Or did the loop end because of the amount of intrigue in the school? Or did the loop end because the butterfly effect occurred?

Each game lasts for a set number of loops, a number that is public knowledge to all players. As the game continues and the Protagonists begin to piece the puzzle together, tension will ratchet up as each player struggles to outsmart the other.

The Mastermind will win if they are able to make it through all loops without being foiled and the Protagonists fail at the “final guess.” The Protagonists will win if they either foil the Mastermind on any loop or succeed at the “final guess.” The game gives the Protagonists one last chance to win after the final loop has finished: guess all players’ roles (meaning that the Protagonists have effectively figured out what plot and subplot are in the script, and have been able to essentially map out which roles each of the players have been assigned by the script).

Tea for Two (Scaling for Two Players)

The only real scaling present in Tragedy Looper is the same scaling present in a game like Fury of Dracula (2015) or the aforementioned Descent (2012): one player will have to play multiple characters. In this case, multiple protagonists. In general, this is far from optimal, but I don’t think it’s as bad in Tragedy Looper as in some other games. Unlike a game like Mansions of Madness (2011) or Fury of Dracula (2015), there’s not nearly as much bookkeeping. You’ve got no items, health, or abilities to keep track of, because each Protagonist doesn’t really control one character, but has the ability to influence any.

At the same time, some of the tension is removed with only two players. First of all, the Mastermind will miss out on any table talk, with one player essentially doing all of that “table talk” in their own head–I think in this case it’s just called thinking. Second of all, there is a mechanic in this game that essentially screws the Protagonists: if they each play the same card, it cancels and the action is wasted. With only one player handling all three Protagonists, this will never happen.

If you’re okay with these little issues, Player Two and I think the game plays very well with two.

The Power of Love (The Good Stuff)

I have to be honest and tell you that our second game of Tragedy Looper was one of the best and most satisfying single gaming experiences I may have ever had. If you don’t know anything about Tragedy Looper, I imagine the Lowdown was sort of baffling. This is a very hard game to teach. But the experience is fascinating once you get the basic idea down.

Like Detective (2018), the actual mechanics of the game are remarkably simple. If Detective (2018) is a time-management game complicated by narrative induction, then Tragedy Looper is a basic hand-management/grid movement game complicated by hidden information, deduction, and bluffing. All of the complications come from the actual deduction inherent in Protagonists watching the Mastermind and slowly eliminating options as the noose tightens around their own necks. For the Mastermind, on the other hand, this is a basic hand management/grid movement game complicated by bluffing, misdirection, and clever timing. Each player has very different responsibilities, and must play the game very differently.

Like I said, Tragedy Looper is unlike anything I’ve ever played. This doesn’t feel like deduction, it is real deduction. Detective (2018) is great, but when I play it, I can’t get over the feeling that it’s not really deduction, instead it’s time management as you wander around in the dark, managing resources as you try to build a case from a smattering of details. 

I like heavy games, and Tragedy Looper scratches an itch that I didn’t even know I had. When Player Two and I play, I am always the Mastermind, not only because Kathleen’s not 100% comfortable running everything (of which there is a bunch), but because she’s the real deduction hound. I enjoy the feeling of pulling the strings as you move characters across the board, slowly lining up events like dominos so they will fall at just the right time, triggering the end of the loop without giving away too many clues. The design of Tragedy Looper manages to be as clever and dense as it is beautifully elegant in its simplicity, and that fact really can’t be overstated.

I Want a New Drug (The Bad Stuff)

But the bad stuff. First of all, I’m not a big fan of the art. I’ve watched my fair share of anime, but I don’t feel the artwork adds anything to this game at all. Additionally, the components are kinda cheap. I sleeved the cards to not only prevent chipping (they’re all black), but also because the card stock is bad. The only cards I think I’ve used that are worse are in Doctor Who: Time of the Daleks (2017), which in this house has legendarily awful cards.

But that’s fine, whatever. If you’re interested in this game, it’s a huge, rewarding experience, but you really need to know what you are getting yourself into. Each player will have a player reference. Okay, big deal, 75% of games come with player aids these days. They’re handy! Yes, but these are spreadsheets. I’ve included a portion of one in the montage image above. It’s a literal spreadsheet telling each player which roles are present in which script, how plots trigger, how loops end, what abilities individual roles may grant players, etc. It’s a lot. No, really. Like a lot. See, I used bold to emphasize it doubly.

Brass: Birmingham (2018) felt like a big, overwhelming experience the first time we played it. So did The Gallerist (2015), and Labyrinth: The War on Terror (2010), so what’s different? Well, 90% of the actual gameplay of Tragedy Looper, or at least the gameplay that really matters (like the deduction, the process of elimination, the analysis of possibility or potential) will happen in your head. You’ll have notes scribbled on your napkin or your hand, and you’ll be contemplating texting yourself notes to try not to get lost in your own brain. I can’t forget that the principle was at the shrine with two paranoia when the loop ended… It’s a lot.

Like nearly all of our games, we’ve only ever played this game together as a two player game. We often joke that teaching someone Race for the Galaxy (2007) is a nightmarish experience because of the madcap symbology. But after playing Tragedy Looper, I’d rather teach my grandmother Race for the Galaxy (2007) on a school bus filled with seven year-olds than teach anybody at all Tragedy Looper, even under optimal conditions.

The End (Final Thoughts)

I love Tragedy Looper, but perhaps the most illuminating reveal in regards to the game is that we played it about four times over a fairly compressed amount of time, but haven’t played it since. I’d love to play it again, but the idea of relearning portions of the rules (yes, I have forgotten more than a few things, and this is another reason the Lowdown may be a little brief) gives me cold sweats. Its learning curve is keeping me from playing it, and I’ve played it multiple times. It’s ranked 9/10 on my Board Game Geek, but it doesn’t rank in my top 40 games. Why such a disparity?

Ultimately, it’s an unfriendly and demanding game. Will the work required to play pay off in the end? And will it be rewarding enough for you? That’s the question you’ll need to answer yourself. I don’t honestly know myself. It’s still on my shelf, but I don’t want to play it, something I feel bad admitting. I don’t want to put in the work, and not because the game isn’t good enough, but because it’s a lot of work, and it’s very heady. This is a complicated review because it’s not as binary as most reviews are. I have to say “It’s great, but…” or “You should get it, but only if…” and that’s something that can’t be ignored.

There’s a hungry fan base who have made a plethora of home-brewed scripts beyond the 10 that come in the base box (or the smattering of expansions Z-Man released over the years since Tragedy Looper’s 2011 western publication), and you can buy this puppy for less than $20 in about 6 different places online, so like Kraftwagen, it’s a true bargain bin deal. If you can break through the invisible barrier around this game, what you’ll find waiting is amazing.

But that’s a pretty big “if.”

Player One Eric