#when like other ppl are just not interested in that. we simply come to games for different things

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

perhaps my most #cancelable videogame take i can post on this website is i think that the kind of people who say that anyone who picks the "morally wrong" or "mean" options in video game dialogue should, as a player, feel bad about their own choices/morals in real life. is that those people are just another flavor of the kind of dudes who play Disco Elysium and get mad for not being rewarded for picking the facist options. both of these groups are reducing games to "a thing I want to agree with me and everyone else who doesn't either suffers or does not have the option to play a character who behaves otherwise" rather than "a medium where you get to (or even Have to) explore different kinds of characters in order to experience the full depth of the story and characters in it."

When I want to pick options in a game that are mean, negative, arrogant, or ignorant, it's because I want to explore what would push a character into becoming that kind of person. Sometimes I want to see how the NPC characters who I-The-Player like/agree with react to someone who is fundamentally different from them. I think it's GOOD actually when the narrative allows you to push limits and especially when it has the option to then punish you for it in some way, such as losing options/routes later on, or companions straight up abandoning you for your choices. It DOES often make me deeply, viscerally uncomfortable to make choices in a game that are so counter to my own, but it means I get to experience that discomfort in an isolated environment and also think about what it means, what would push the character or even yes a real person into actually feeling those things. And I get to play with what ways the narrative could challenge them/make them grow over the course of the game--or on the other side, it can let me make a character who does start off more open/accepting but let the events of the narrative push them into being more reactively closed-minded instead.

I like that we have invented a medium where you can play a game multiple times and experience it differently depending on the character you play as. Books and TV and movies are all static--the greatest draw of games to me is the ones that are responsive, that can tell a slightly different story every time--when other characters in the game respond differently to you because of it, or some paths open up and others don't. And so yes it did disappointment me when a franchise that previously had these elements, Dragon Age, did not include them in the most recent installment. I don't think games should have options where you get to just hit a button to say something racist with no consequences or exploration into why a character would do that. but like, if i can only ever play a game as an upstanding person who is morally right all the time in basically the same flavor for every dialogue. I only get to truly play that game Once, you know? And I only get to see the way the companions react to someone they like and trust. And never really go deeper than that.

So like... I just sit and think about the scenes you can get in Inquisition. with Cassandra breaking down, because she fears she placed a would-be tyrant at the head of a powerful organization--that she searched and searched and chose wrong. Of Varric who is desperate to convince you not to become a monster, like the last person he feels betrayed him. Vivienne intentionally pissing you off because she wants to see how far you'll go when angered, how much she has to worry about your reactions. They say so much about the companions, what they fear most, and where they will draw the line. And especially in Inquisition, at these crisis points--you don't have to double down. Your character can have a come-to-Andraste moment where they go "woah... is that really how people see me? is this what i want?" and I think that kind of option can do way more for encouraging actual players to examine the choices they make in stories, more than locking the player into supportive, non-aggressive options does.

now. do i think all games execute these flavors well? no. writers and devs will have their own biases and blind spots, even if they are otherwise well-intentioned. and I don't think the ends of the scale need to extend from "absolute angel" to "horrible bigot", because the real complexity of course lies in the middle. I am not asking for games to let me be bigoted at every turn, what I want is games that let me make the protagonist deeply flawed in one or more ways--fearfully closed-minded to things outside their upbringing, or afraid of change to the status quo, or who want to advance their own aims regardless of consequences to others. I actually agree that the game was correct not to include any options for disrespecting Taash and their personal journey for example, but I do wish... idk maybe that we could have had a scene where if for instance the player character avoided outside-world missions relating to clearing away blight, they could confront us on how this might devastate the natural world and its creatures like dragons, and push us into trying to resolve it. Or in the other direction, if you spend the (currently meaningless) time giving money to background NPCs begging in the cities, Neve could could have a special cutscene thanking you for your attention to people otherwise beneath notice. You know?

And of course not every game can do this, I can write those sentences up there that represent hundreds of hours of dev time, of course they can't do it all. But the prior games usually did have at least a little of this, and that was enough to make me really fall in love. I KNOW the tumultuous development cycle, restarts from scratch, interference from higher-ups all contributed to why Veilguard was unable to hit those same marks this time. And we probably won't ever know how much of the loss of options/reactivity was intention vs a side effect of these things. But I wish people wouldn't frame players who miss these aspects as insane/morally corrupt. When for most of us it's because we genuinely enjoy challenging and exploring these aspects of reality in fiction in a way entirely unlike what we actually support in real life. i fully acknowledge not everyone desires to play this way. and that's fine!!! i am glad people can enjoy doing a "good" run each time that brings them joy. but for me it really limits the potential bounds of my enjoyment i guess. I like media that is complicated and messy and makes me think, and extra so when I get to see how playing that way impacts the greater story around it.

[woman-respecter]

nah, can i say that appreciate ur opinion on mouthwashing? bcuz i have the exact same problem with the fandom and it gives me an ick. i only watched a play through (shoutout to cory kenshin) of the game, but the storytelling is quite surface level. its basically an unreliable narrators and while i do enjoy those type of stories, mouthwashing feels like a game for ppl just discovering complex storytelling and the ppl hailing it as some devastating critique of workplace capitalism makes me wonder if they interacted with any type of media.

i do love that its an indie game and the more popularity indie games get, more ppl would gravitate towards it compared to the bigger gaming studios. concerning the fandom, i do find them annoying. its one of my issues with fandoms where there are interesting female characters front and center or the story is very deep/compelling to discuss about, but fans twist it into shipping two men together and blorbifying the basic white dude. i swear the ship between the rapist and the captain only exists bcuz fans wanted to ship two dude together for the sake of it as the two characters don’t have much chemistry together. plus the blorbifying a rapist is just ugh when he gets the most attention and the other characters are ignored.

even more annoying when its done by female fans and i feel like a lot of them have internalized misogyny when it comes to how they approach female characters. bringing up another show, arcane, i also hate how its one of the few shows out there with well written female characters and the most famous ship is between two white dudes who are secondary characters at best compared to the one canon lesbian ship (caitvi) that exists right there. yet when u bring up that double standard, its either fans be like “well hollywood doesnt write good female characters, if they did maybe we would give more attention to them” or i have seen a lot by fanfic writers, “im a woman not comfortable writing female sexuality bcuz its gross and objectifying to me.”

which for the first excuse, goes out the window when there are shows/movies/games/books that tumblr would stereotypically like, but theres barely any publicity for it and fans also put extra effort to ship a male character that has 2 scenes with a more prominent male character simply bcuz they made eye contact 4 seconds longer than usual in one scene. for the second excuse, i can kind of understand, but it sounds misogynistic to describe female sexuality as something dirty naturally and considering the type of ship dynamic tumblr loves (bottom/top), they basically have code that dynamic in a heteronormative sense where one man is the “feminine” one and the other is the more “masculine/dominate” one, its also hypocritical with the objectification excuse.

thank u for this! was hoping to hear from someone who played the game or watched a playthrough. and holy shit your experience is worse than mine with the fandom. i could have never imagined they stooped as low as to ship the RAPIST with the ship captain. ugh gross.

i really do hate tumblr’s tendency to ignore interesting narratives or female characters in favor of the yaoi. like i’m all in favor of fujoing out and i will admit to reducing a “horrors of war” videogame series to my little buffet of yaois but you’ve gotta do it in moderation. arcane is a perfect example bc those lesbians were actually canon and yet the girls on tumblr are obsessing over the two yaoi boys.

i sometimes understand the appeal of yaoi as something completely divorced from the male gaze and the trappings of heteropatriarchal relationships, but i really think the main reason women enjoy it is not that deep. it’s bc they center men and, mostly, they think it’s cute/hot. like 90% the latter. and it’s silly when people try to make up reasons beyond that. the “well i don’t like female characters bc they are poorly written” argument is the one that holds the least water tho, considering the guys they will make their blorbos.

[yichens]

tag game ✨

thanks for tagging me zey @thasorns ♥ i teared up at your addition about me, that is so sweet :( i miss our dff talks too! idk what you're into these days but would love to talk about some show with you again :')

-

1. why did you choose your url?

bc am obsessed with one (1) man who belongs to another amazing guy ♥ (been thinking about an url change lately tho bc i'd like to put last twilight and the hurt it caused behind me but haven't found something else to tie myself to yet. maybe we are and phumpeem if the ending delivers?)

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

not really. the only side blog i have is my og url vishcount saved for nostalgia purposes but there's nothing on that blog

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

started on this hellsite (affectionate) on the lord's year 2013 and it shows

4. do you have a queue tag?

i don't use the queue much so no. you will only catch me reblogging like ten posts in a row when am online/in the mood and then going back to lurking again

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? 

i was into a bunch of animes and tumblr was filled with amazing fanart. i wanted to be able to look at them in peace

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

to show who my url is about ♥ mork my beloved

7. why did you choose your header?

wanted it to fit the theme. also i adore the last twilight rooftop kiss, it's one of the brightest spots of the show

8. what’s your post with the most notes? 

most likely this the untamed edit from 2020. i was truly living my peak back then :'D tbh i feel like the whole of tumblr was living its peak when the untamed was airing and when we all lost it together for the longest time after

9. how many mutuals do you have?

way too many and i adore all of them, tho i probably forget or cannot recognize most of them. especially if you've changed your url/main fandom OR i have, we might not even know each other anymore haha

10. how many followers do you have?

more than i deserve and idk what all of you are even doing here but i like feeling like i'm part of some type of crowd ♥

11. how many people do you follow?

quite recently i unfollowed some inactive blogs and blogs about things i don't really care for anymore so my follow count is a nice number of 205

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

uh. i don't really know? do some posts from my finnish tumblr (suomitumppu) era count? :'D

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

am chronically online and i open this app like a fridge

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

no, not really. am not really one to share strong opinions, especially negative opinions, publicly online which i think is the cause of most arguments ppl have here. i'd rather just keep my peace and be nice

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts 

mostly i don't like doing things when am told to do them

16. do you like tag games?

yes! it always makes me happy to know that someone is thinking about me and i do find these a lot of fun to do ^^

17. do you like ask games?

also yes. i just don't often reblog those bc i don't really have a lot of interactions on this site. if i find an ask game with very interesting questions, i might forward it to kiddo @i-am-just-a-kiddo and we do it together privately to enjoy it like that ♥

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

the first one that comes to mind is hanyi @ruanbaijie who i think deserves all the recognition for her absolutely amazing giffing skills ♥ she's also the sweetest so idk what's not to follow, make her even more famous if you can!

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

nope. idk if i function like that tbh. i have some huge friend crushes tho and want to be closer with some ppl a lot! not mentioning names bc am shy haha

but i want to say that monica @stormyoceans is very important to me these days. she brightens up my days and makes my whole fandom experience so much better by simply being her enthusiastic and authentic self ♥ never change!

and also jessi @oswlld who i still cannot believe is someone i can call my friend and bestie on this site. i am so happy we've gotten to share bad buddy, vice versa, and last twilight together! also happy to hear about your life at times and to just share silly things with you ♥

third one i want to mention is shannen @icouldhyperfixatehim who always manages to stand out in a positive way. we don't interact much but i cannot help but feel very giddy about their presence on my dash. they leave the best tags and every time they reblog any of my edits with their tags, they manage to make me feel like i've made it and my edit was worth the effort :'D so thank you!

20. tags?

want to tag at least @psychic-waffles @foxofninetales @hils79 @sherrymagic @srnileforme and @thitiponqs ♥ also the ones i mentioned before are free to join and anyone else who wants to do this!

[layzeal]

What are some of the things that are ace codesd abt wwx? I don’t hear much abt and and am curious!

HIII, okay so as always, "coded" isn't really the right word since it implies authorial intent, but i often use it anyway bc who cares it's my blog. just know i don't think wwx is actually canonically supposed to be demi, it's just a headcanon from silly ol' me!

i do have a #demi-wwx tag you can check if u'd like too hehe

now, what makes wwx come off as SO incredibly acespec/demisexual for me is his approach to... well, relationships in his first life. he's a flirt! he likes teasing people! he likes watching them blush! he likes getting a reaction! but as lwj questions him in the xuanwu cave about, it all seems like very much a game to him, something he does without actual intention, unaware of the torment he might be putting others (lwj) through

i often see people say that wwx didn't date or that wangxian didnt get together in his first life because "they had other things going on" and "there was no time", but that's not only innacurate to post-sunshot, it genuinely comes off to me as if wwx simply has no romantic or sexual interest in anyone at all. granted, he has an eye for pretty things and people, and is VERY vocal about whenever he finds others beautiful. lwj is a common target, but far from the only one!

basically, for as loud as flirty as he can be, we know that's never really genuine. there's no second-intentions or desire in his words (hell, he had even been saving first first kiss for twenty years!!), even when it comes to lwj. and the way we know it is by comparing it all to how he acts, thinks and feels after he's ACTUALLY experiencing attraction for the first time!

but what does have to do with him being demi? and what makes, in my mind, wwx so much more demi coded than lwj for example, whose entire romantic arc is only falling in love with one person?

well, that would be that despite the way it's been romanticized, demisexuality has nothing to do with "only falling in love once". devotion isn't acespec exclusive, choosing to love a single person in your life isn't acespec exclusive. demisexuality is simply a term to describe the specific conditions a relationship might need for an asexual person to experience attraction. those conditions? a strong emotional bond (which is why so many demi ppl are described as "only being able to fall in love with your best friend")

and to me, that's what sells wwx as demisexual the most. he's had so many friends, classmates, xiongdi, and all sorts of companions in his life, but none of them were particularly... emotionally fulfilling. other than perhaps shijie, who he saw more like a mother and sister, there was no one else who he could truly lean on and trust, open up, and be vulnerable with. for many people, that's not a barrier that gets in the way of developing romantic or sexual interest in someone at all, and that's great!! (we see it with lwj himself, who spent so many of his teenage years frustrated for liking wwx and had to slowly realize why that wasn't shameful or a bad thing. lwj's attraction not only came before there was any significant bond between them, it directly blocked it from forming earlier due to lwj's constant avoidance of wwx!)

but for demi people, and for wei wuxian, it is a barrier. it's almost comical just how fast and deeply wwx fell in love with lwj once he opened up to him. it is the most visible in wwx's second life, but i do find there are inklings here and there to it in his first, especially after wwx and lwj get to spend some pleasant time together (ie. post-phoenix mountain and post-yiling date with a-yuan)

but it really does become the most obvious after the yi city arc (drunkji 2 my belovedddd). by that point, their friendship and closeness was already solid, and wwx is already crushing HARD, but isn't quite aware of it yet. it isn't until post-jinlitai stab (and his flashback to his and lwj's youth, how they fell apart and how lwj was only ever worried for him) that he starts pondering if these feelings might be... more than just fondness. and boy do i eat it UUUUUP

it wasn't until wei wuxian got that reassurance of trust and closeness that his feelings truly started to develop. i genuinely cannot imagine a wei wuxian who falls in love with someone who he genuinely believes hates him, and it's actually something i believe stopped wwx from developing deep feelings for lwj in his first life. we know how much all his rejections and their disagreements hurt wwx, and in the back of his mind, he always thought lwj disapproved of him, maybe even disliked him. there was no trust, and it smothered any small, warm little inkling of romantic love from sparking into a flame

so when wwx finds himself with a lwj who is indulgent, who wants to be close, who protects him, comforts him, listens to him, and won't ever let him fall... well, you can't blame him for daydreaming about a calm farm life by his side, or being embarrassed for acting so shameless while still pretending to be mxy, or wishing from the bottom of his heart that even if lwj doesn't love him back, he'll still stay next to him

he only ever wanted lwj to be his friend, and now he's the closest and most intimate one he's ever had. and he treats him so well... all the barriers have fallen, how could wei wuxian not fall too?

(and i didnt rly get into it but this all applies to physical attraction as well! wwx behaves and sees lwj's beauty through two different lenses in his first and second life, and wwx himself noticed the difference from when he could see lwj's nakedness back then without batting an eye VS now. it's hilarious, endearing, and EXTREMELY relatable!!)

[powerpuff2003]

I'm so sorry. Those ppl telling you to kys are Way over the line, but you need to understand that you have heavily internalized terf viewpoints. All these people aren't just calling you a terf for no reason. And your deflection that you're "literally trans" is meaningless. Do you think cis women can't have internalized misogyny?

You talk about how some trans women have "cis male mindsets." That's terf rhetoric. You literally just told a trans woman "You're a man." You're a terf.

Your relationship with porn is explicitly what terfs take advantage of to lure people down the radfem pipeline. I'm really worried for you, sis. I'm sorry you've only been met with anger for this. It's understandable, but it's our responsibility to look out for our younger sisters.

Please rethink the conclusions you've come to. They won't make you happy. You'll never be able to surround yourself in trans joy when you're constantly looking over your shoulder for "the bad ones".

I appreciate you being kind in your words instead of simply hostile.

I think a dude with a conversion r*pe fetish is a man pretending to be trans to get his sick kicks and not really trans. That is my opinion on the matter. Assuming that's the incident where I called someone a man that you saw.

If "the bad ones" are homophobic sex pests then yes I will reject them out of simple morality, not "optics".

I understand that I will never be "the good one", I've been down that path, tried, failed, tried again, failed, its tired and it will not work. I do fully know. But I will still fully stand for what I believe is right even if other trans people disagree. Terfs won't agree either, and I'm not trying to pander to them anyway.

I want to surround myself in trans joy, I really do, but as long as there's people who identify as trans women making lesbophobic r*pe kink blogs, femicide jokes, homophobic coercion. As long as these things are ok in some portions of the trans community, I have to alienate certain trans people from my life. I do partake in trans joy with trans friends, in fact almost all of my friends who aren't cis women, are trans people. A large portion of my friend circle is trans women, my girlfriend is transfem, I'm t4t. Trans women are pretty much the center of my life in that respect, seeing as they're the only people I'm interested in forming an intimate life-long partnership with.

If anything its BECAUSE I see myself as a woman in my subconscious that the sexism some trans people expound hurts me so much. And, when they do that, within my head I cannot think of any rationalization other than "they do not really see themself as a woman like I do". I don't know how else to explain it in my head. I have to fear "the bad ones" because in fact some of them are known for preying on the community! Watch The Sasha Manifesto by Keffals.

This is a very difficult and very complex subject for me, I do hope you see that I am being genuine in standing up for what I think is right and am really truly not trying to be "the good trans" as I think that is a losing game. Feel free to message me if you want to have further conversation, I think we could really come to something here.

Also I love your blog aesthetic. SU carried me through my teen years.

[johaerys-writes]

15 questions for 15 friends

I was tagged by my dear @elveny, thank you so much!! 💙

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?: No! Well, yes, after a character in Greek mythology, but not after a parent or grandparent or anything like that.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: Yesterday. I was reading the Iliad again for an anon ask and was going through the part where Achilles kills Hector and oooh that scene got hands 🥲 I cry a lot though, I'm a crier, and a lot of the time it's about patrochilles so it's par for the course really lol

DO YOU HAVE KIDS?: Nope.

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?: I'm fairly active generally but I don't play sports at all because I don't like them. I tried several sports while in school before accepting that I simply don't like team sports and I'm not good at them, but I had much more fun with solo sports. I swam for several years somewhat competitively, and I also did track for a while. 

DO YOU USE SARCASM?: I think so? But usually only with people I'm very comfortable with, because I can never know what would go down well or not with a person I don’t know. 

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?: That’s hard to answer because I feel like it depends on the situation. Most of the time, it's body language and their general vibe. Meeting new people can be nerve wracking so I try to "read" them and act accordingly, if that makes sense? I don't want to step on any toes or say the wrong thing so figuring out what the other person's mood or interests might be usually helps. But that often means I miss out on other things on first encounter, like... their eyes or smile or something?? Lol idk man, socialising while on the spectrum is hard 🥲

WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOUR?: Brown.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?: I think I'll pick scary movies because I do like horror and dark stuff and I don't care if the ending is happy or not as long the story is interesting. 

ANY TALENTS?: it took me so long to think of something for this and I honestly don't know? I'm assuming by 'talents' we mean something you're born with, not something you've worked hard at like some kind of craft, right? In that case, I think I have pretty good visual memory, especially when it comes to books and articles and such, or the written word in general. Oh and I'm weirdly good at orientation, I can usually find my way no matter where I am. Which isn't such a huge deal now in the era of google maps, but back when there was no gps it was a pretty useful skill to have haha. 

WHERE WERE YOU BORN?: Greece.

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?: Writing, reading, gaming, crocheting, drawing, going to museums! I'm constantly on the look out for new exhibitions and stuff, it's my favourite thing in the world to do. 

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?: A darling and dastardly cat, aka my extension when I'm at home. 

HOW TALL ARE YOU?: 1,68m

FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?: Oh god I freaking hated school, absolutely hated it LOL I can't think of one thing I liked in it. I guess I only enjoyed the very last year of high school when I was preparing for the Panhellenic exams because like... it felt like there was finally some kind of purpose or reason to be there at all, even though there was a lot of pressure. I loved Ancient Greek, Latin, History and Philosophy. 

DREAM JOB?: I don't have one, I don’t dream of labour 🙃 I don't think there's any sort of job anyone could do in this capitalist hellscape we're all currently living in that would be enjoyable enough to make up for, well... living in a capitalist hellscape lol. If I could, I'd just go back to uni, probably. That was my happy place and I miss it. And I'd also write a bunch and read a bunch and take up all sorts of creative hobbies, and probably travel more. 

Tagging forth to a bit more than 15 friends lol sorry (and I know I'm forgetting ppl): @baejax-the-great @thiefylilelf @vimlos @mogwaei @gloriesunsung @aymayzing @cordelia---rose @knicknocknick @aristi-achaion @peachandfig @heypax @darlingpoppet @tevivinter @mary-aries @tragediegh @pikapeppa @figsandphiltatos always with love and without any pressure 💕

[shirogane-oushirou]

edit: i decided this would drive me nuts, but i still want to keep it in case there's something worth salvaging in the future. ignore all of this ^_^

for some reason i'm interested the idea of poke!ren beginning our friendship with that like... unintentional infantilization a lot of people do with disabled people when they're trying not to be actively ableist? not because i enjoy that LMAO ABSOLUTELY NOT -- and my pokesona is prideful as hell and would DESPISE it -- but i think it would make sense.

[cw casual ableism, infantilism of disabled ppl. also, disclaimer: i'm basing some of this loosely on my own health issues so it may not 100% apply to all disabled people. just want to keep that straight LMAO.]

most many doctors are SUPREMELY ableist, but doc!ren went into his field SPECIFICALLY to help disabled people and so focused on how best to treat each individual person according to their personalities and disabilities. sure, poke!ren's also technically both a clinical doc and researcher, but if doc!ren is like 80% clinical 20% research, poke!ren is like 10% clinical 90% research.

so poke!ren... doesn't have that knowledge. he does mostly field work and some lab work, with the rare "what do you think about this specific medical case?" appointment. he's the kind of person who hates the more vocal brands of ableism, but is consistently overbearing with his treatment of disabled people in a way that's inadvertently exhausting to deal with because "what happens if i tell him this is also ableist? will he have a fit? will he get angry or upset? will he decide disabled people are too picky if i'm not the Perfect Disabled Little Meow Meow?" so you just end up suffering through it.

therefore, he goes full "paper skin, glass bones," with me, very, "oh i can get that for you! no don't stand up, i can do that. can i cook something for you? no no no, i mean, i know you COULD, but wouldn't it be /easier/ for me to make it for you? you might hurt yourself!". 🙄

we have an evening outing in another city. it gets dark, we're not at the point where we're comfortable staying at his place together, he offers to maybe help me find a hotel, and i say "nope i've got this!" and fly away home on a Fucking Lugia.

and then he has to sit with that and realize some things.

like the fact that he has no idea who the fuck i am beyond surface level. after all, i've been carrying a legendary bird around in my back pocket and he didn't know until now, months after we first met.

like the fact that i can take care of SOME things by myself with the right "tools" or pkmn. i SOMETIMES need help, but i don't ALWAYS need help, and if i DO need help i have the option to tell him myself.

like the fact that he simply saw me as Disabled. as though i didn't have a life before or outside of Disability. i was simply the pitiable, lonely, disabled vn nerd he talks about games with.

and then he has to relearn Me from square one, and it makes our relationship so much stronger. we're able to work on our perfect balance together and build the trust that HE won't take things over for ME when I'M capable of something, and that I will let HIM know when i need HIM to do something I can't do. he has to trust that i'll let him be more doting on the days when i'm having flare-ups, but simultaneously has to respect when there are things i still want to do myself even on those worst days.

.........idk. this is a lot of words to say "god i want to be taken care of, but in a way where the other person sees me as an adult with a personality and decision-making ability and a life that's deeply AFFECTED by disability in many ways but isn't JUST disability." yk?

tbch, after writing it all out, this maaaay end up as canon..... OR it might remain a theoretical offshoot depending on how comfy i am when the Mental Movies (tm) of us finding that trust come together. poke!ren's supposed to be like. PURE escapism, so something like this honestly might hit too close to home to feel good fdhfghfg. like at least he'd end up learning that balance, which is nice... but everything leading up to it? 😬 Maybe A Bit Too Painful....

(damn. verbose king over here, wrote all of this TWICE just to say "i might throw it out" lKNMADKJFNKJDNF)

[aydaptic]

Just say, for the sake of argument, that Gavin had to be paired up with someone else besides Nines. Is there any other character in dbh that you believe would be the most compatible with him (male or female).

Tbh, much like yourself, I only see Gavin being compatible with Nines and it does actually interest me to think that if Nines had never existed, who would be the next best person for Gavin's character (I know what the most popular gavin ship would be if nines didn't exist but we don't talk about that)

With what we know, the only canon alternative with speaking lines that might work would be Canada Border Guy™ (CBG)

whether or not he lets Kara into Canada -- without a sacrifice -- is dependent on public opinion (so he's not a pushover)

they both work in law (...and might even know each other)

he's calm/composed

we're especially attracted to ppl who visually share similarities with us (Gav/CBG have a lot in common appearance-wise)

we know very little about him

Using him specifically in CH15 of A&E (WebComic | Written) wasn't random.

For someone to be a good fit for Gav, they need to be calm and composed. The no. 1 thing a man wants when he comes home is peace and miniscule conflict. Especially someone who cares deeply about their job -- as Gav does -- bc he puts in extra hours meaning he's extra tired when done for the day/night. It needs to be someone who lets him be in charge. Yet also have the backbone to say "no" when necessary.

All the other characters we see in-game are either too aggressive/dominant, too passive/submissive, or we simply don't know enough about them to pinpoint a personality. Compatibility, especially in romantic settings, is way more complicated than ppl realize. 9/10 ppl think they're more 'accepting' than they actually are.

I assume you haven't seen the ask I got when I went into detail about why Niner works best among canon characters, so I put the link in.

[starryseafo4m]

🎫 + isolde !!

YESYESYESYEES (okok I needed some time to gather my thoughts before I could answer cuz omfg I got so many things in my mind rn and I may or may not have gushed and ranted about her lore and upbringing more than me just simply loving her, so I deeply apologise if there are any grammatical errors!)

Okokokokokpk ISOLDEE, alright so first of all how the game portrayed her, her first appearance, her in the end of chapter 6, and her backstory

First things first, she, from the very beginning was introduced to us as a patient who is ill and unable to live a normal life due to hysteria(the story takes place in a era where hysteria was interpreted as a valid illness to be diagnosed with) and so ppl had pity on her from the very moment of her existence

Because! We see in the event "A small room" where we witness her backstory, we are first introduced to Isolde's mother and her deceased daughter (Isoldes older sister that has passed away) and once the others find out that after this tragedy, Isoldes mother was announced pregnant with her(Isolde), and so others pitied her when she wasn't even born yet!! Afterwards we are given an explanation that Isolde's family possesses the capability of talking to spirits but one of the ghosts that resented (not really but partially) was her older sister (and from what I understood it was because she wished she lived instead of her)

I can go in depth how much chapter 6 gave us in regards to Isolde that makes her such a complex and interesting character, she's neither good or bad she's so flawed but yet so pure intentioned because by the end of the day she desires a world where arcanists are not discriminated against by society, making her think that "the salvation" is the cure and liberation of all arcanists

And now my rant as my f/o. She is one of the most gorgeous individuals I have ever seen in my experience, I don't tend to believe in things such as "love at first sight" but I must admit this is how I felt when I first met her. At first she seemed like an untouchable force of nature above all beings but ever since understanding her she's much more divine because of her humanity and desire for her people to be happy. I would like to kiss every part of her face, every little eyelash, everything, I'd like to give her the most gentle of kisses and reassure that everything is going to be alright and that I'm not going anywhere (because after hearing her voice lines we can assume that she has attachment issues) I'd love to wake up next to her and pamper her with the softest of kisses and admire her beauty that lies in and out of her soul. If she's ever sick of the ghosts that haunt her, I, with the biggest pleasure would let half of her ghosts to haunt me so she'd feel the pleasure of a quiet undisturbed night

Thank you for coming to my yap fest<33 I really appreciate the liberty that I have gained now that my emotions are written down!!

[single-malt-scotch]

i kno theres a lot of comparison for Good Season between s9 and s7 and i love them both bc they really have entirely different vibes. they cant be the same. i dont think its fair to say why one was better than the other but rather recognize what is different about them and think about the numerous things done and why they worked well, potentially thinking about what would be nice to see going forward.

s7 was interesting bc it isnt unlike s9 in having some kind of central location and then hermits spreading out from there, as well of the numerous 'events' that occurred.

i think a central area is key... not just spawning in the same place together, but spawning there and establishing something there. s9's spawn blossoming in that spot with everyone's small starter homes was lovely because it basically made a small neighborhood. it seemed natural to make a little starter base to prepare and live in before going off to build a potentially bigger base imo. my favorite thing about s9 (kind of s8 simply because of proxy voice) is the excitement and chaos of starting and everyone bumping into each other and poking fun etc and i think spawn is a key part of that! its what i look forward to most for the start of a season.

in terms of events, its something the hermits were very good at in s7 and naturally did in s9 again. events are good. they allow collabs between bigger numbers! i cant even count all the events on each season but i realize i feel there is like... a 'roleplay-ish' event and some kinda game event lol. and strangely we had two events that had to do with controlling a district/server etc (s7 mayor and s9 king). which is just coincidence. but, this kinda back and forth of funny 'lets play pretend" to some degree can be amusing to watch and i dont mind it, but its the way that its played out that matters. s7 mayor was pretty simple and didnt effect other people too hard (it was on a much smaller scale tbh), whilst ren's king arc was incredibly involved!! and that is NOT an insult (i think it was done decently in a way where ppl not involved did not have weird video situations of being confused or left out-- they could ignore it easily).

it is just wild to see the progression of work done between these events these ppl created. honestly no matter the ups and downs of the king arc i cannot applaud ren enough for everything he did, it was insane. this is to say-- i wouldnt doubt a pattern potentially coming through-- playing pretend in a way thats a bit more than just a prank war, and obviously making silly games. games are really The staple of the server and the way people get together to have fun. my only wish would be to not have another mayor/king/etc arc lol. i dont think thatll be an issue.

i think what stands out for both season are the things some hermits make that arent mini games or just a little play pretend, but the long going events that get people involved for a longer period-- s7's button, tag, head games, decked out or the base trade. s9's decked out, tcg, mumbo's new button, ren's quests, etc... and i imagine they will all come up with new things again. s9 at least to me felt like it lacked some of that but its probably more because the ones that did come up lasted a long time inbetween giving hermits more time to work on their builds. but they all came in waves that felt fitting. let a thing happen for a while, it slows down, people spend time more specifically working on their base. rinse repeat. i guess in some ways it felt 'organized' but i can see how it maybe didnt work for some people-- some didnt like watching tcg and when it was the main focus, some people didnt watch. same goes with decked out.

and of course, across both seasons, its always a toss up on how "complete" is feels. and my prespective is less of who completes what, but instead how the season potentially affected their ability to work on their stuff. of course there are all kinds of irl things that affect them too so i cant judge this as if i know everything. s9 felt kind of linear? again, in the sense of how larger scale events were spaced out. and i feel like ppl were given good spans of time to work on their stuff. really, it just seemed like irl things is what slowed some people down towards the end, especially when the pauses between things like tcg and decked out were spent dealing with irl, and then returning because of those events. at least from my perspective, s7 felt a bit more chaotic in terms of this pacing due to the randomness of events and the fact they would often take them away from their bases. i dont actually feel like anyone worked less on their bases in s7 than s9, but the big things that happened were not at all paced the same way as they were in s9 (it sometimes made me feel like they werent making much progress at all even though they were lol).

it is interesting taking a look at these two seasons because i think they had a lot of the same stuff, but both went about it differently. i think these two seasons define the hermits very well-- the kinds of stuff they do, the stuff they enjoy, and what they tend to keep doing. assuming s10 doesnt get some kind s8 treatment i can only see this one going forward just as well as the previous. and i hope as well to see some very interesting new ideas from after the insane massive works like tcg and decked out 2.

[nogenderbee]

hii i wanted to send smth for the event!!

nicknames for my lover: idk I'd prob just use their name or a shortened version, or come up with smth silly

hobbies: playing guitar, drawing, listening to music, playing rhythm games

perfect date idea: just staying home and cuddling while maybe watching a movie too

something i hate in others: when they're pushy and don't understand if i don't want to tell them smth, when they judge others, and when they lie for attention

main personality traits: uhh quiet, reserved, creative, sarcastic basically. I'm bad at starting convos and expressing things with words also

activity i like: like i said, i rlly like playing guitar!! I'd like to learn bass guitar and drums too someday

activity i don't like: big social gatherings (worse if there's ppl i don't like) and studying (but I'm a perfectionist so i study anyways)

i think that's it!! have a nice whatever it is in your timezone :D

Of course! Let's get right into it then!

I pair you with...

🥁🥁🥁

Ichika Hoshino!

⊱ okey so Ichika is used to Saki others calling her "Ichi" but if you come up with something silly, she won't mind! In fact she'd probably just laugh it off

⊱ as for hobbies, she likes every besides drawing. But it's not like she hates it so she can draw with you if you want! As for playing on guitar, you both literally make such an incredible duo! Maybe you two even go to live house to perform together from time to time?

⊱ she also likes your date idea! You can just be comfortable in each other arms while a movie or Miku song is playing in the background!

⊱ she's a bit bad at socializing too... but she tries her best with you! But I have a feeling like you often have that comfortable silence~ As for other traits, she had hard time adjusting to your sarcastic personality as she sometimes takes things too seriously... but she became used to them eventually and got the hang of when you're sarcastic and when you're not!

⊱ now... other interests! Since you're thinking on learning how to play on bass and drums, I'm sure she'd ask Honami and Shiho to help you if you'd want! Honami will definitely agree but Shiho may be hard to convince...

⊱ and finally, you both aren't fans of crowded places so you most likely won't go much to public. As for studying, she won't stop you from studying as it is important but she will try to get you to relax a bit and not go too hard on yourself

You and Ichika were now simply cuddling at one of your rooms. It was perfect since it was raining outside so you had no one interrupt you! In the background was playing some movie even tho it may've been a bit hard to convince her to not play Miku music AGAIN. But now you're really just enjoying both, music and each other. And what's the best, she seemed to like the movie!

"You still think watching a movie is bad idea?"

"Ah, I never thought it's a bad idea I just... really adore Miku... But the movie is really nice! We can actually... watch another one when it ends..."

It was a bit surprising but you were glad you found something that suited her taste. And you won't say no to seeing how interested she is while being cuddled into you~

❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉⊱•═•⊰❉

[kakujis]

Hi! I'm sorry but what does CPL mean? that's okay, i'll answer on my computer too and the app is just glitchy, it's not worth the risk.

that's true, leander could definitely be a big plot twist like he may had already figured out how to cure the MC but keep it a secret so she won't leave the city anytime soon. i've seen their tumblr blog but i cannot do that because it would remind me of the long awaited release date which is forever away LMAO. are there just characters page for the love interests or is there one for sen/elyon too?

i suppose since they are the non-humans character, it does seem likely that is the case. maybe, vere broke into the senobium and learnt stuffs that he shouldn't had ? or maybe he own them some debt or something ? that's true but all of these vital info would probably be reveal in the halfway point of each route.

if the moon was a person, it would be mhin like look at their character design! that's interesting though because i'm sure they and ais are opposites. vere is definitely eye candy but the studio had poured their hearts into their designs because the artists have added distinctive touches to their faces.

but vere's and leander (marks and scars) are the only obvious one, with the rest, you do need to look closely like mhin's beauty mark, ais's eyebrow with the shaven streak across the centre and the golden teardrops underneath kuras's eyes.

that's sound fun! good luck with that. i really like mhin because their character design solely pulled me and their character/personality because i saw myself in them which is probably a bad thing LMAO. i was leaning towards ais too but when i noticed his eyebrow, i got reminded of my brother because he naturally have that with his one so it hasn't been the same since then ;-; but i like kuras a lot!

there was a fem!li for another otome game called ozmafia but i think it was platonic romance? i think it was more of a friendship route since it came out in 2013. that's true, i cannot recall other female characters in otome game and if they are, they're normally a shit stirrer or the mc's rival.

i hope the studio see the fan comments about sen so they won't change her design because it would be such a waste! ais would be terrifying as a yandere though esp since he have those soul eaters (is that what they call) at his beck and call. but i feel like their approaches would be very different from each other like ais would be upfront and controlling but leander would be patronising and gaslighting.

like with leander, the mc would need to be smart to realise what's going on otherwise it'll be too late or they're just simply naive where they will never realise and i dk which fate is more worst.

speaking of yanderes, do you read/write yan! contents? i read them a little bit but nothing hardcore and i am writing some yan fanfics (bnha and tokyo revengers series) but i'm posting them on ao3.

kuras is very polite and private, he does fit his profession but i felt like he was someone who used to wear his heart on his sleeve but shit happened. the other origins would reveal more of him considering his dialogue towards but it'll only be trinkets/hints so ppl will play the game when it come out.

there is a possibility because his basic summary sentence that he's looking for the one thing that money cannot buy so he seem to be the only rich character. but sometimes, i do wonder if sen will be blind (?) considering her eyes and the scar/stitches on her face, it does look like she was in a horrific accident.

i'm going to add it towards the end but my shipping cost will be $20-$40 so i might just abandon the idea. i'm sure there will be a chance to buy more merch when the game come out but it's probably be more expensive than the kickstarter version.

yh, i saw that goal! do you think we might get partial voice acting for them too? but the animated intro, that is the studio's biggest dream, it's the one that they want to unlock the most.

oh, i know what that is but never heard the official japanese term for it, thanks for explaining. do you ever feel embarrass with your? because i've noticed that most of them have inappropriate designs so i never went ahead and brought them. from your body pillow case, i'm assuming you're a gamer (?)

well, i think that's a bit hasty too because if studio fail to develop the game, kickstarter won't be able to refund their pledge but i highly doubt that will happen but that's always a risk regarding kickstarters. (i feel like this is something mhin would probably say too LMAO)

i think the studio added more slots for that but are already sold out or on the last one.

hiya <3! cpl is a shortened way to say: couple! i write with a ton of shortened words n phrases, i'll keep that in mind from nyeow on! also hard agree on the app being glitchy, i've seen a ton of ppl saying even their tags aren't working and i'm like tumblr can we get it together just once!!!!

maybe! i think the way that leander is strong enough to resist the curse is telling in itself! god he's so mysteriouss, i wanna know more, sobbing. also, i think kuras may also know as well since he IS a whole angel + doctor. i didn't see any chara pages for sen/elyon yet! but i think we'll probably get those :').

i think so! either that or he willingly went to the senobium and ended up getting captured! ORRR he could've been betrayed? I know kuras used to work with the senobium and vere HATES him. EEEE MAYBE THATS IT? i'm not sure why kuras would sellout vere though.. hm. UGH NONNIE WE HAVE TO WAIT SO LONG WHILE WE THEORIZE..

YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT MHIN BEING THE MOON UGH. i wanna write a drabble on that line now hehe. they're so beautiful, so pretty, so handsome and everything in between and beyond. i wanna make mhin my computer bg cause i'm soo in love with their design. and IKR LOL. ais seems to be a lot more carefree and mhin is a lot more uptight. i agree w vere too! i love his outfit a lot also, like it's total inspo for me irl ngl! honestly, i think the reason why mhin's is so subtle is cause if you look at their design compared to the others they are the brightest palette, in the sense that they're almost completely white besides their cloak!

AYYY no don't worry about that! honestly, i liked leander because he reminded me of me! super helpful and not asking for anything in return (except this is touchstarved so what do u really want leander.. :eyes:) ALSO LOL THE SIBLING TURN OFF IS SO REAL HAHA. i'm into kpop right? so no matter how handsome josh from seventeen is i CANNOT be attracted cus he has the same name LOOL.

ahhh platonic ... i like platonic love, i really do but please gimme my wife!! i actually have a couple of fem charas in my drafts, so i won't be surprised if i start something for sen when she's released and we see more of her! also i agree, i hate the 'oh theres another woman.. shes a rival.' i dont want a rival i want a best friend or gf, the heck.

AH THE SOULLESS! yes yes, he could literally use princess to sniff u out and bring u back. thats kinda sexy. i love that. absolutely agree on leander being gaslighty and ais being controlling! eeee. i think leander would be a lil more easy to read tho, especially if he's being antsy about something. i think it's cause during the demo he kinda just lets his thoughts slip out, at least from what i remember! i think being naive and unknowing is worse, cus leander has always been leander to you, sweet and kind, if not a little clingy so why is he suddenly acting like this? type of deal.

i do write yan! i'm not the best at it though, like i think my yan!kakucho n yan!baji fics are both just awright on the yan aspect, i could've gone further especially with baji's but he's so nice in my head that i couldn't lool. i have a suuuper old yan!nightowl ficlet in my drafts that i wanted to convert to a tokrev chara, i was thinking kazutora buut we'll see. also really? i need to start using ao3 more! i have my baji fic queued but i need to put my kakucho one up too :>. if u wanna share them with me anytime i'd love to read!!!

agreed with kuras, it does mention that he's failed a ton in the past, so he's probably much more guarded now even though he's still a sweetheart! it did say sen was brought back from the dead and is seeking revenge and her own death so maybe! as for elyon, eee i usually don't like rich guys kjdsdsksdf unless u reo mikage LOL. but we'll see~

ahhh that shipping is insane omfg.. >< maybe in the future they could find a way to lower shipping prices eep.. but i know thats entirely dependent on the post office, not them. also YES I SAW THE PARTIAL VOICE ACTING KADSNFSDKFN, i already have voice claims for them in my head but ofc it's all japanese va LOL. i don't know many english vas... but i was telling my friend that mhin as paku romi's role in aot(hange) is sooo spot on in my head. just paku romi in general i assign with mhin hehe. we're actually soo close to that goal already for the animated intro!! im SO EXCITED to see the next stretch goals after we hit it!!

nahh i don't feel embarrassed haha. i've become a lot more indulgent on myself and if it doesn't hurt anyone, there's no harm in having it! i don't necessarily sleep with him because i don't want my dog to accidentally pee on it (shes a senior dog who has a lot of accidents now) but he does rest on my bed! and yes i am! i play a looot of games and as of now, one of my dream careers would be to work on a game to write lore or a character in the future! maybe make my own game? who knows! a lot of them do have inappropriate designs LOL, but there are some that are relatively sfw. i know the obey me! dakimuras just came out but i read they're super expensive.. like 100+.

LOL yeah i think mhin would say that too! they're soo serious. c'mon mhin gimme a smile, -pokes-. AND YEAH THATS kinda insane to me how fast those tiers sell!! like dang!!!

[alacants]

*pulls up chair* newbie to tennisblr here again. would you mind sharing some views on like. your favourite current women’s tennis rivalries? are the last legion of comets like raducanu rly coming back? do you believe naomi is gonna win again? etc etc

open-ended question getting me right in my weak spot hahaaa. that is, i can talk ad nauseam about some specific things that i am deeply devoted to but i have a very poor birdseye view of the landscape. (for example i never in a million years would have clocked madi keys taking ao but some of my VERY OWN MUTUALS correctly predicted this!!!) so this is mostly gonna be a round-up of links to other, better thoughts.

#1 specific thing i am deeply devoted to: YES NAOMI WILL WIN AGAIN iiiiiif her body allows it. like, based on her recent play i completely believe she has it in her, i just dunno if the injury/fitness issues will abate long enough to let her build up a head of steam. not to mention get through a whole draw. ugh i really hope so i would throw so many players on both tours under the bus for naomi title. ;_;

things that are not naomi winning again:

first of all if you are interested in rivalry narratives you simply must read mayafritzes' emma navarro & zheng qinwen lorepost

but i mean look. it's gotta be igaryna. what if we were #1 and #2 circling each other warily as our fanbases tore each other apart and then we hung out and discovered we actually have a ton in common. (wow maybe this sounds familiar.) this is the "easy" answer but it compels ppl for a reason. great meta about how the rivalry has Evolved. (as for the tiktok incident where iga BROKE ARYNA'S PHONE… idek where to start…)

now. my fave relationship is not a rivalry it's my 37 year old babygirl sara errani who was on the verge of retiring and then rediscovered the JOY of TENNIS thanks to her 28 year old golden retriever of a doubles partner. who btw was experiencing the breakout year of her journeyman career. then they won olympic gold. i'm js it's probably true love. please see sara's 2024 recap on ig for details. yellow do you see...

(and now people want jas to dump doubles and focus on her singles career YEAH RIGHT. she's very up front about how doubles has helped her game and tbh i think it helps her mentally too.)

this isn't lore it just makes me laugh every fucking time

speaking of naomi. and iga. and naomiga. 2024 roland garros match is unmissable.

cocoiga is also going places

vika azarenka still out there seeded for majors and masters... cries about it. <- not a narrative just important to me

many karo muchova lovers on the dash. this is The karopost. to me.

ons jabeur/wimbledon trophy. ao3 tags star-crossed lovers, unrequited love, hurt no comfort, major character death, dead dove do not eat.

raducanu… sigh. i mean. comet is right. or actually meteor. flashing across the sky only to flame out and fall to earth etc. this might? be an unpopular opinion (??? ihni) but i like her and i'd like to see her get back to winning. it feels farther away every tournament but. tennis is a sport of surprises. maybe she WILL be a comet and come back around on another swing. hopefully not one of the ones whose orbits take 63 years.

oh. OH. holy shit how did i almost forget this. EMMA RADUCANU + LEYLAH FERNANDEZ. dfjdajf;df.

the andreeva sisters. when they play each other… fascinating. also, you know, talk about shadows you'll never escape lmao. 

last but not least if you are re-exploring tennis then you've probably picked up on this already but what the vlog is appointment television.

[roxannarambles]

It is late, my sleep drugs will kick in soon, I am rambling about Indigo Disk. Big huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge spoilers n such

Not gonna talk about Paldean Pals at the moment, that's for a another time. Talking about other complains haha

I dunno how I feel about Kieran going all 'friendship with Ogerpon over, Terapogos my NEW BFF now'

Like, in some ways it makes perfect sense, he's on the rebound. It also implies maybe he never was interested about Ogerpon to begin with, he was mostly just interested in power/strength because of self-esteem issues.

But silly 'ol me, I thought the 2nd DLC might have some kinda emotional resolution between Kieran and Ogerpon. I guess in a franchise that wants to sell games and DLCs though, the suits wanna make it all about the next big exciting Legendary/Mythical, so the 'old' legendary has to be ignored in favor of the shiny new crap. I'm used to seeing that junk in gacha games but jeez, I guess it's not just gacha games, is it?

And don't get me started on Kieran's "resolution" with the Player character. That was weakly done. . . they really whiffed it at the end there. I think his descent into madness was done well enough and had me interested, but when it came to him "snapping out of it," as one character worded it (Drayton, I think?), well, I dunno if that's something you simply 'snap out of.' And they didn't ever give a compelling reason for him to do so, imo. Terapogos rejected him just like Ogerpon did, then he helped us deal with the threat, ok? Not enough of a reason in my mind for him to come to a major realization about himself as a person or about life.

So in the end, when everyone got shoved to the side in favor of Kieran's story arc (Nemona, Arven, Penny, and even Carmine in the 2nd dlc), they didn't even deliver on a satisfying conclusion to that arc, imo.

And as to the whole deeper mystery about Area Zero, wow man, they totally gave up tying ANY of those loose threads, huh? Was it a real time machine or was it Terapogos granting wishes? idk lol who knows. Is the barrier still in place for Area Zero and is there a risk of the Paradox pokemon escaping again (Geeta mentions this as a reason they need more ppl researching the area)? idk Are they gonna keep the Paradox pokemon down there in some kind of top-secret eternal Jurrasic Park? idkkkkk but hey look at the sparkly turtle mythical pokemon!!!!

(Also, what's going to happen now that we shoved the magical wish-granting genie into a pokeball? Well idk but the justification for capturing pokemon gods/demigods has always been on REAL shaky ground ever since Gold/Silver so. I guess I can't complain there. But to be honest it's one of the reasons I do dislike legendary/mythical pokemon)

The artists went OFF on the design of the Lower part of Area Zero tho, that looked super cool. The part with the tree though, it SHOULD have been where we encountered Terapogos. It looked so epic and gorgeous (brassius: avant-garde!) shut up brassius

ok sleep drugs are kicking in big time so byeeeee for now

[survivor-marieta-islands]

Episode 5: "I'd rather die than grovel to a group of white people."—Raffy

Antigua

Amy

whoopsies.

I simply couldn't do rocks like that

Zo

So unfortunately for everyone i am somehow still here 😎

Maddison

tribal days are so stressful PLS i need some reprieve lol. i feel bad for the ellie vote out but! i don't like to be two timed. it also could be someone else doing the two-timing but that's the game. last time i played in an ORG there was the biggest rat of all in my alliance and i was sooo caught off guard sooo tryna not let that happen again. also just so y'all know i actually am great at spelling and grammar but this forum is legitimately a giant brain dump. i hope i didn't ruin my chances to work with colin or raffy but if so, so be it. chat soon!

Amy

okay but for real I can only play with who really wants to work with me at the present and I have the ability to readjust if something goes awry. tell me about alliances that exclude me and I'm tempted to work my way in and correct that. and I don't have the energy for last minute info. i do feel bad for not telling Colin Raffy and Ellie that I wasn't going to do rocks but Ellie was jinx target last go and even Colin said last go that they would vote Ellie but they were in alliances and wanted to go to rocks. Simply my plan became to remove options from Colin and Raffy but also still protect us three, though I also was mess bc I could have just told them whoopsies. They are mad and this could still easily flip onto me but I feel good in my group with jinx and JG and honestly I love other ppl doing the work for me while I sit back and wait. Though yeah I shouldn't have blindsided not going to rocks here 😬 and I do love rocks so it's a tough loss but I told Raffy and Colin from the start i wouldn't vote them but jinx really tried to switch the vote to Colin last minute so I had to stop that lol not happening even if they blindside me next 😅 tbh this vote didn't even need to happen and if raffy would have kept the vote on zo I probably would have voted with that side and got someone else to do so too bc girlie was living her best life when I was working for hours on that puzzle. Anyway I lost some info access but I want to keep the game interesting 🤠 (for me) and give myself space to move when I need to.

Raffy

I need to win this tribal immunity or I am going to be a pre-merge flop. I guess I made too many mistakes these past two rounds. First mistake was trying to target JG during the Steven round. That made him not trust me and now I lost an ally. Second mistake, was then trying to work with JG on the Zo vote which gave him ammo against me so that he could throw me under the bus to Zo. Third mistake was even going along with the plan to flip the vote to save Steven as I should have just given Steven up the wolves and not reveal my position. Fourth mistake was actually voting JG instead of Ellie which cements him not working with me. Fifth mistake was not revealing all the info I had to JG about that woman's alliance so that JG would actually trust the info. There definitely could be more, but that's just what I can come up with.

Where do we go from here? I have no idea. I think Amy and Jinx are protecting me, but, at this point, does it really matter? Looking at whose on the tribe, even if they wanted to vote out Colin, Zo is definitely going to want to vote me out more since apparently Zo and Colin have a really tight relationship and JG doesn't trust me at all. So, that's like two people who would most likely push for me to go. Idk if Colin is even going to try to salvage this or throw me to the wolves since he must also be feeling it's either me or him. I think I'm just in a "wait and see" sort of phase since I don't have power, sway, or even a voice on this tribe. So, I have to wait till a tribe swap or merge to even re-establish myself on the social hierarchy.

I don't even really wanna talk to Zo or JG since I don't even know what to say. They obviously both know I came at them at some point and anything I say to them would just be twisted to take me out. I don't really wanna talk to anyone on this tribe either. Cause it's just too difficult. Feels like I'm groveling and I'd rather die than grovel to a group of white people.

Zo

Jay you’ll be hearing from my lawyer for that tribal because the literal cardiac arrest i am in still!!!!! But seriously what a rush the passion it was truly incredible I am so sad JG is gone tho :( Here’s hoping for no swap fuck today babes!!

Amy

Tonight was a LOT. What just happened?? Guess who with a disadvantage, then deciding on a live tribal??? I almost voted Colin out but when zo said she couldn't I said oh I guess I'm voting JG out then bc I just couldn't vote Colin. Sucks though the JG Jinx Amy alliance was iconic. Anyway a live tribal while I'm running around in public straight into a mutiny swap?? I just went for it bc I have never mutinied and it sounded fun and chaotic. In the end it's 3 olds to 2 news on 2 of the 3 tribes! Me raffy and jinx together (so jinx and Colin aren't fighting lol) like this is WILD???? Olds control 2 tribes and the other is all Youths. And I think I won Raffy and Colin back over from being mad at me.

But I gotta say the funniest thing of the night. Turns out I thought AJ and Adeline were the same person.

Sin Sazonar

Trinica

Girlllll idk what's happening. I thought JG would be going, instead Els is gone. I *think* that Raffy and Colin and Jinx are working together? Maybe? And they were some of the votes on Els? But I also think I'll need to drop all my preconceived notions because past relationship does NOT equal current alliance. Anyway, bummed to see Els go, they seemed cool 😭

AJ

Wow Hairie really pulled through with the puzzle challenge. I was fully ready to go to sleep and wake up to defeat but goddamn. If that round wasn’t a rollercoaster I have no idea what is. But also, I have no clue what the voting sitch is on the other tribe, and that scares me with us potentially going into a swap. Jay turned off chat history today which is like, mmm not sus at all. But I digress. I feel both better and worse since I’ve got this idol in my pocket, but we’ll see how today goes. Trinica’s got a handy dandy spreadsheet but the other tribe has people who’ve been super fans much longer than I have. Wishing us all the luck because I have no idea what’ll happen if we lose. Pandemonium probably.

--

So I may have just made the biggest mistake of my entire game but…we shall see. I’ve told Trinica about the idol. This might bite me in the ass, but honestly I feel better having someone else who is informed who can help properly use this idol. But also, could bite me in the ass if there’s an attempt to flush it. So honestly who knows. This is either the biggest mistake of my game or a good move. I really hope it’s the latter.

Trinica

Okay not only did AJ find the idol right before me, she also TOLD ME ABOUT IT. Sometimes when I play with AJ I feel like I have to talk to her about security precautions in the same way I had to talk to my old social work clients. Like no, you should not give your new hookup your social security number! No, you should not go buy an iTunes giftcard to send to the stranger texting you! No, you should not tell other players you have an idol until and unless absolutely necessary!

But hey, I'm glad she told me. It's a sign of trust, which is good. Now the question is... do I honor that trust? Or betray it?

In an ideal world, I'd have an F4 with me, Hairie, AJ, and Brandi. But Hairie and AJ are on a "I don't trust the other" spiel with me and Brandi in the middle. I could try to repair that, but idk if that's to my benefit at this point. And it feels irreparable tbh. I really want to tell Hairie about AJ's idol, but I don't think that's a helpful move right now. We will keep that in the back pocket.

Brandi has said she wants to work until the end with me, which honestly was a little unexpected but it's good news. And although I'm definitely working more CLOSELY with Hairie as far as strategy goes, he's not somebody I would necessarily want to sit with at the end.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. For now, surviving this round.

Shawn

I'm really worried about my chances after this. If our tribe doesn't win the next challenge, I feel like my head could be on the chop. Im sitting out this next challenge because I genuinely don't know survivor that well, I liked it as a kid, I like this game. But Im so bad with names and I haven't watched it in years. I hope my tribe understands how badly I want to participate, but how I have NO knowledge. I hope our tribe wins again, and we don't have to go to tribal.

Brandi

I have never known peace like getting to sit out of a challenge. I am just vibing. There are no responsibilities that I have to tend to. No stressing or freaking out. I am just chilling

Arvin

I think I didn't contribute that much to the challenge because I was preparing to go to work. I took a bath during the challenge, so it's hard for me to keep up but yeah, we did it again. We won another challenge and so nervous for the swap. 3 tribe of 5 is a pretty small group and there's no hiding place. I hope I get into a strong tribe that can win challenges.

Shawn

We are about to merge and all I can say is I hope I'm with Trinica I really like them here we go I'm scared !!!! I hope my shhhh! Team can stay together through this time of - oop you posted!

Brandi

I have lots of feelings because my number one alliance member might’ve lied to me eek big feelings but ima keep my head up

[mishanym]

Thank you for @mysteriouslover1516 for asking me this interesting question.

How do I imagine Jake?

(Please refrain from reading this if you haven't completed the game as this contains some spoilers. :) I recommend you to finish the game and come back to read this after).

I imagine Jake as a reserved personality. I imagine his life to be difficult and much of a loner. That's why he's easily feeling shy.

He prefers to appear mysterious because he needs to maintain his identity a secret, being chased by the government and all, he appears creepy to most others but he doesn't feel scary or creepy at all to MC. Most probably because he helps MC with many hacking perks from the very beginning to help them in finding the suspect. And he also shows how he only trusts MC and is willing to work together with them so MC sees him as a partner not as someone who is scary or creepy at all (despite all the questionable hacked sources ofc). ;) Ofc there are many things about him that are still mysterious to MC and let's hope MC can know more about him. Only to MC especially. :)

He doesn't show his emotion much except when he's with MC so most probably he's an introvert person who will warm up with certain ppl whom he is already familar and feeling close with. Just like how he is with Hannah.

I think Jake is also a curious person. He's curious because MC is like an "X" factor that remains as something unpredictable and surprising to him in so many aspects and layers. He also really appreciates and respect MC. One of the reasons is because he learns many things about MC that he finds endearing to him. For one, he tried to half force MC into the problem He's in and MC has every chance they have to ignore but they choose not to. Next, MC even indirectly, if not directly, defends him from the group and keep his identity and any information about him safe from anyone. MC never blames Jake too much about the problem that comes after. Next, Jake seemed like he never really worked with a partner that he feels close to him before and I mean not physically close but psychologically and he's surprised that he feels that way about MC. (Tbh I didn't expect to fall in love with his character too).

Through these qualities Jake deems MC as a valuable partner he can trust.

He's also a secretly caring and a romantic person. Many times when MC was in trouble he jumped in and helped out without being asked. He also can suddenly type out something or do something that's just simply romantic out of nowhere. That random "Do you like chinese" question and statement about it reminds him of MC. Also how he just blurt out about how his mind can't focus on his task cause his mind always flies back to MC. I find it as romantic, but how he says it in a non flirty and non cringe kind of way... It does tremendous damage to my heart, ack. I find it so charming. (Yes, I'm a sucker for someone who can show that he cares in a non cringey way).

Up to this point, we can assume Jake as someone who can't control his feelings specifically, love. But he seems to be a calm and collected person, usually, maybe unless when it comes to love. :) Remember how he's annoyed because phil called MC for help and he admitted, "Yes. I'm not usually like this."

Accompanying his caring personality is his protective behavior. He protects MC from his pursuers, he created Nymos 💙 He is also so very determined in preventing MC from going to Duskwood at any cost. Also He finds it hard to turn his back on Hannah's case and even if he tried to cut any contact with Hannah, when she asked him for help, he finds it hard to refuse. Does he have hero complex, hmm not really, more like he has the protagonist qualities.

I think he's actually not a brave person inside, that's why he is charmed by how brave MC was pictured in the story. He's afraid of losing someone he loves. But despite not being brave enough, he always tries to act strong and put up a brave front.

When he loves someone he seems to be the type that is gonna go all out or nothing. I give it my all or I don't go at all. :)

I also imagine him as the type who won't easily fall in love. He fell for MC under very exceptional case which makes his love feel exceptional and rare. Maybe he secretly believes in destiny and that he will meet the one for him.

He's also loyal and ofc as we all know, extremely smart. He's mostly rational and not emotional except for some cases that involve people who are important to him.

He's not selfish. He honestly doesn't want to drag people to his mess that's why he pushed away MC at first because he knows it's dangerous to be with him.

I also imagine him as someone who can't be easily impressed by others. (Only when you do very exceptional thing that would impress him, ofc MC always impresses him, but hey Thomas did impress him too, once, if I'm not mistaken).

He's awkward with crowds. He often doesn't know the right words to say so he keeps it short and straightforward. He claimed to be able to handle bad guys and bad situations better ;)

He is honest except for things he needs to keep secret because he thinks it's to protect someone or keeping someone safe. So he does keep secrets but all the things he ever said is honest and the truth. Because everytime MC said "you're keeping something from me aren't you?" He never denies it. So he's not a liar.

He's pretty nerdy too :) why, because he rarely says anything except for the case they're working on or when he's explaining stuff that he's found and he's interested in (flashbacks to when he talks about the history of ironsplinter mine in long lines to MC, lol.)

He's very observant. Maybe part of the perks for being very smart and having a curious mind.

He's not good at reading people but he can take hints and not completely clueless.

He's stubborn alright. He needs some convincings if you want him to do otherwise. And there will be no discussion if it's a matter of MC's safety.

Yes, you read it right, Jake is NOW OFFLINE. :)

He also has a cute quirk, unique, and special talent for understatements. :D when we told him he was surrounded by his pursuers he just said "This is not good."

I find how he's always typing his words in a formal/serious sentence and ending them with a period as something that is not awkward at all. It's charming and hot. :) And his smileys, and his 'haha.' And 'hehe.' Aaaaa..

So yes, he is a cool, charming, closet romantic introvert kind of person with all those qualities I have mentioned above which make him this complete personality, the Duskwood Hacker Jake that we all come to love. 💙